Podcasts about bengtson

Episode Summary: In this week’s episode, I’m talking with Dawn Ward, who shares her painful story of being a mother to two sons who have struggled with addiction. Dawn shares how God has used those wounds, healed them, and given her purpose in her pain to encourage us that God never wastes our pain. Quotables from the episode: I was a Christian and I thought that if I took my children church and taught them the Bible and did all the things according to God's word then those evil elements of the world would somehow not get to our family, but that didn't prove to be true. When I tried to outrun old wounds from my childhood, these old pains and things that had hurt me so much came back to haunt me when my son became involved with the wrong friends and the wrong movies and troublesome behaviors. Both of my sons struggled with addiction and I faced intense guilt and self-blame and shame because at that point I thought it was my fault. I remember crying out to God, “I thought that I was doing better in my relationship with you. I thought I had more faith. I thought I trusted you. And now I'm just in a big pool of my own tears.” And that is so often what happens when we hear messages in childhood that are not always based in truth. Earlier in my life, in my career, my faith, or things that God was tugging at my heart to do, I was reluctant to step out and be bold and do those things because I didn't feel adequate. I didn't feel like I would be able to do it. And I look back on opportunities that God put in front of me, and I told myself I couldn't do them. There came a breaking point where I realized I have to figure this out, because if I don’t figure out how God sees me and the things that he’s given me responsibility for and that he trusts me to be a wife and to be a mother, but yet I’m not trusting myself to do it with his help. I needed to trust God to begin to reveal lies and the thought patterns that were holding me back and affecting all my relationships. One day my husband confronted me and said, “You are going to worry yourself to death.” And I told him he had permission to write that on my tombstone, “She worried herself to death.” But I heard the Lord say to me, “No, it’s going to say she trusted God.” That was an aha moment for me when I realized that every choice that I made moving forward, I needed to ask, “Do I trust you, Lord? Even though this doesn’t make sense. Even though I can’t understand why it’s going this way.” So, I wrote a book hoping maybe other moms wouldn’t have to go through as much pain and all of the hard lessons I had to go through. It’s really about getting our relationship back with the Lord and having our faith in him that can withstand these storms and helping us to trust him in the process of those difficult and painful things that we have no control over. That’s the same thing with us with these wounds. If we don’t allow God to heal them the way that he wants to heal them. Most of us wouldn’t sign up for half the stuff that we end up having to go through in our life. But the beautiful thing is that when we turn it over to God and we trust God through it, he can bring something beautiful out of those painful wounds. Another benefit that comes from that is our relationship with our children and our loved ones, whether they’re in a good place or not, it becomes healthier just because we become healthier and stronger and we’re healing. I look back and sometimes truthfully wish I didn’t have to bear this trial, or that my children didn’t have to bear their trial. But I can see that God has cultivated trust and faith and hope through his grace into my life. And I’m so grateful for that because I don’t think I could have really healed from some of the things I went through as a child without him working through the process of this healing with me as an adult. God is not finished writing your story, or your child’s story. He loves you very much. If we can imagine how much we love our child and to imagine that God loves them that much more, and he loves us too. When we look at our God and what he is capable of and realize that his eye is on that one little lost sheep that’s wandering, that gives us hope. Recommended Resources: Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Dawn Ward: Website / Facebook / Instagram For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Dawn Ward is a speaker, writer, and biblical life coach. She is the founder of The Faith to Flourish, a ministry equipping women to live transformed lives through inspiring teaching, mentoring, and biblical resources. Dawn also offers support and encouragement to women with addicted loved ones. She is married to Steve and mom to three adult children. Her book, From Guilt to Grace: Hope and Healing for Christian Moms of Addicted Children is scheduled for release in September 2024. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: If you’ve ever struggled with relating to God as Father—maybe you’ve been hurt by an earthly father or a church leader and carry a misunderstanding of God’s heart for you-- then this episode is for you. Rev. Jessica Van Roekel and I talk about Relating to God as Father and Understanding God’s Love When Earthly Fathers Fail. Relating to God as Father is vital for a proper understanding and close relationship with the Lord. We can lose sight of who God is when we forget that he is not like us. We are made in his image, not the other way around. Fatherhood is an important aspect of God’s character and when we can relate to God as father it can transform our life. Quotables from the episode: Knowing God as my Father has brought so much comfort to my life. I know many of our listeners and viewers carry deep wounds, and my prayer is that today’s conversation will bring encouragement and hope. Relating to God as Father is essential to experience his comfort and blessings of being his sons and daughters. He gives us mercy, love, forgiveness, compassion, faithfulness, and goodness. When we reject God’s fatherhood, we struggle to experience the comfort he offers to us. Earthly fathers are an imperfect and flawed example, but God is a perfect Father. He always has the best intentions for his children, and he always has the ability to carry them out. Jesus taught that “Father” was the way to address God. “Father” was Jesus’ favorite term for addressing God. In the synoptic Gospels, we count Jesus referencing God as Father approximately sixty-five times and in the book of John, we see it over one hundred times. Because of Jesus’ use of this metaphor, the rest of the New Testament emphasizes the Fatherhood of God. In Paul’s letters, God is described as “Father” over forty times. For Paul, God’s fatherhood is based on the redemption and reconciliation he has made available to everyone through faith in Jesus Christ. There are a lot of misconceptions about the Fatherhood of God that can keep people from relating to him as Father. Let’s take a moment to address some of them. One of the biggest challenges is being hurt by people—fathers or father figures. One of the reasons is we are such sensory beings. We feel so deeply the wounds of betrayal and if we compare God to mankind, there’s no way we could trust him with our heart. But humanity is made in the image of God, not God in humanity’s image. We are a reflection of parts of God. But then sin entered the world and shattered the reflection. It’s like we all have a shattered mirror in our chest, and we can’t see other people clearly or ourselves clearly. This skewed vision impacts how we see God. But his “mirror’ is intact. He is the perfect reflection of a perfect Father because he is our Father. Ephesians 1:5 comforts us, “God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.” Another challenge to relating to God as Father is when we misunderstand his discipline. But discipline is an important part of growing and living for him. It not only rebukes and corrects, but it also trains us and guides us. Discipline assures us we are God’s children; Discipline is evidence he loves us and has concern for us to not be condemned by the world, but so we can share in his holiness. It sounds like there are three responses to relating to God as Father through discipline. One response is to shrug it off where we refuse to take it seriously or despise it. The other is to be over-sensitive and withdraw emotionally. These two will cause us to reject God as father. But the one who receives God’s discipline as an act of love will draw closer to God’s Father heart for us. I think it starts with trusting God. God delights in protecting the weak, disadvantaged, oppressed, hurting, and lonely—especially when we trust him. If you feel alone in the world, you can ask God, as your Father in heaven, to put you under his special care. And sometimes, we need to consider how deep our honor and respect for his power, judgment, and intolerance of evil. When we cultivate a deep honor and respect for him, God liberates and motivates us to avoid evil, obey God’s word, and to live with a continual awareness of God’s mercy and nearness. To those who revere him, he gives mercy, love, forgiveness, fatherly compassion, faithfulness, and goodness. The final step we want to share today is to ask the Holy Spirit to create the feeling of filial love that causes us to know God as Father. I love Galatians 4:6, “And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, ‘Abba! Father!’” Because we are now God’s children, we have a new “guardian.” We can be free from religious rules or the devastating impact of human failures. Abba is Aramaic for Father and expresses the depth of intimacy, warmth, and confidence by which the Holy Spirit helps us relate to and cry out to God as Father. When we refer to and relate to God as Father, we demonstrate the transforming work of the Holy Spirit in our life. Relating to God as Father has nothing to do with how poorly you’ve been treated but has everything to do with placing your entire trust in God’s love for you. You have the freedom and the right to approach our heavenly Father with the confidence that you will be accepted, welcomed, and loved. Scripture References: Ephesians 1:5 comforts us, “God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.” Hebrews 12:6-10 states, “For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives. It is for discipline that you must endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us, and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” Psalm 68:5-6 reminds us, “Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation. God settles the solitary in a home; he leads out the prisoners to prosperity, but the rebellious dwell in a parched land.” Psalm 103:13 teaches us, “as a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him.” Galatians 4:6, “And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, ‘Abba! Father!’” Recommended Resources: Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In this episode, guest Tammy Kennington shares the deep wounds she experienced as a survivor of childhood sexual trauma—and the heartbreak of watching someone she loves endure the same pain. Through her journey, she shares how God met her in the midst of that suffering, redeemed even her most painful experiences, and gave her sacred scars as beauty for her ashes. Quotables from the episode: My story of wounding is two sides of the same coin, first as a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and then seeing someone I dearly love experiencing the same sort of thing. I’ve really had to kneel at God’s feet, seek Him, and heal physically, emotionally, relationally, and spiritually. My wounds trapped me in grief, fear, and confusion; not so much my own trauma, but the vicarious trauma of the individual that I love so much. Fear held me captive. I thought I would not ever experience freedom again or ever experience any of the Lord’s peace because it just seemed so out of reach. Anywhere I turned, it felt like tentacles twisted around my marriage, my family, my personal life and it attempted to destroy all beauty. The painful wounds I experienced emotionally and relationally were also replicated physically. After I found out about the horrendous suffering my loved one had endured, I found out that I was suffering from fibromyalgia and scleroderma. It took years for those to be diagnosed but God has done an amazing work in my life through all of it. When we go through a painful event, even emotionally, relationally, or spiritually, our body will react to that pain and stress, and create physical health conditions that also often contribute to physical pain. I’m trying to give people permission to acknowledge the pain, but then to step forward to deal with it in a safe healing environment. Because when we don’t, our body will hold onto it, and we will experience physical symptoms at some point. Without healing, wounds rot, they fester, and they go deeper. I’m a testimony to God’s power. I no longer live with fear, with flashbacks, suicidality, or disassociation. And because the Lord healed me, of those burdens, I knew he could heal me of the autoimmune disorder I was dealing with, if he wanted to. It was a long seven-year process. But now I’m coming up on the one year anniversary of not having any fibromyalgia flareups, and I’m going back to full time work in the fall. God has restored me emotionally, spiritually, and physically as a testimony of his goodness. We know that there are times when God doesn’t heal this side of heaven. But those who know Christ will be healed ultimately in Heaven. Even if we are walking through a painful journey now and he doesn’t heal us here, we can count on him because we know he will give us the strength that we need. Scripture tells us that he will provide for all of our needs, and that his grace is abundant. He is a God of mercy, and he is able. If you are in that situation now where you are praying for physical, emotional, relational, or spiritual healing keep praying. Keep pursuing God. Keep praying. God has not always healed areas that I have most wanted healed, he still may but he has not yet, but there are other areas that he knew, in his infinite wisdom, were more important for him to address with me. So I continue to press in for healing, but I trust God’s timing and his perfect plan. God does redeem our pain. Our most painful experiences when we place them at his feet and surrender them to him can be used for good whether or not the enemy intended them for evil. What flipped the switch for me was when I realized that if I denied my faith, if I allowed my anger and bitterness to boil under the surface, then I would have given Satan the ultimate victory because he would have stolen the most beautiful thing in my life: my relationship with my Lord and Savior. I refused to give him that pleasure. Trauma occurred out of my control, but my response did not. You decided that your faith in God was stronger and more important than the enemy having victory over your life. God can work in and through the most hurtful experiences in our lives, and he can bring us to a place of restoration. Scripture References: Genesis 50:20 NIV “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” Philippians 4:19 NIV “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” Psalm 147:3 NIV “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Recommended Resources: Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Tammy Kennington: Connect with Tammy at https://tammykennington.substack.com/ or learn more about her at https://tammykennington.com/. For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Tammy Kennington is an author, educator, speaker, and life coach familiar with the impact of trauma, mental health issues, and parenting in the hard places. She strives to lead women from hardship to hope and share Christ’s love with the young and young at heart. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: Today, we're exploring a topic that feels counterintuitive but profoundly transformative: "How to Rekindle Your First Love.” Together with Pastor Jessica Van Roekel, we’ll examine why this is important, how it helps us live our lives in Christ, the warning signs of losing it and how to get back to it. We’ll offer biblical wisdom, personal stories, and practical insights to help you embrace joy as a choice, a fruit of the Spirit, and a testament to God’s faithfulness. Quotables from the episode: Search for identity and purpose can only be found in our personal relationship with God. We cannot chase Dr. Michelle’s experience with God, my experience with God, or your pastor’s experience with God. We gather corporately for worship services, but the rest of the week, we “gather” with God as an individual. We must seek our own revelation of his love for us, who we are IN him and TO him. Life confuses, distracts, or points us to look at the world or church leaders for insight into ourselves. Ultimately, Christ reveals himself and will return to set things right. No more broken hearts or tears. All hope will be fulfilled. All promises will be kept. The book of Revelation uses imagery to describe the end of time, but the letters to the churches at the beginning of the book are easy to understand. Christ’s purpose for the letters are to challenge, encourage, warn, and build up believers and churches throughout history. The letter’s values for us today includes: a revelation of what Christ loves and values along with what he hates and condemns. They also give us a clear statement about consequences for disobedience and spiritual neglect along with rewards for spiritual alertness, diligence, and faithfulness to Christ. They also provide the standard for any individual or church to judge their true spiritual condition and provide an example of Satan’s methods for attacking and working against the church or individual Christian. The Christians in Ephesus were complimented for: toil, patient endurance, separateness from evil, pursuers of truth, bearing up for the Lord’s sake, not grown weary. They were criticized for losing their first love. The first love is defined as: commitment to the original love, truth, purity, and power of Jesus and his original revelation. Our first love protects and helps us live the way Jesus calls us to. Our first love protects us because it helps us avoid sin, prevents us from running after false teaching, and helps us not forsake Jesus. But the consequences of losing our first love means we forget about loving the hurting, loving our fellow siblings in Christ, and about our own lost, wretched nature before we gave our life to Christ and his Lordship. We can lose our first love through spiritual distraction, loneliness, weariness, focusing more on the battle rather than our Victor, listening to other voices, and allowing religious actions to replace relationship. But God gives us warning signs. Let’s go through the warning signs: delight in something/something else more than God; lacking of longing for prayer and Bible reading; don’t think about God throughout the day; claim to “be human” to excuse behaviors/attitudes; and lack of cheerful giving or service. There’s more: treating other Christians with more judgment than kindness, view Christ’s commands as restrictions to happiness, striving for mankind’s acclaim, allowing fears to control decisions to share the Good News of Christ, refuse to give up an activity that displeases God, complacent to sinful attitudes around you, and unwillingness to forgive. To rekindle our first love, we choose to remember God’s love, his faithfulness and our initial love for him. We can remember what he saved us from and how we were before we welcomed him into our lives. The second way to rekindle our first love is to REPENT. Jesus, our High Priest, stands ready to forgive us if we would turn and come to him. We need to admit we’ve lost it, stop ignoring the warning signs and bring our “spiritual” care into the “mechanic” for service. He stands waiting for us and we don’t need to be ashamed or put undue pressure on ourselves. The third step is to RETURN. Return to where you lost it. Don’t try to be a mile ahead of where you use to be. Go back and begin again with renewed love for God. Don’t beat yourself up for letting your love for God grow cool. Remember you’re not alone, remember God is for you and loves you. Repent and return. Scripture References: Revelation 2:1-5 To the angel of the church in Ephesus write: These are the words of him who holds the seven stars in his right hand and walks among the seven golden lampstands. I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked people, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not and have found them false. You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first. Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place. Jeremiah 29:13 “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” 1 John 4:19 “we love him because he first loved us.” Luke 7:36-50 Hebrews 4:12-16 “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account. Jesus the Great High Priest Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” 1 Timothy 1:6 “For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God.” Jude 20-21 “But you, beloved, building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in the love of God, waiting for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ that leads to eternal life,” Recommended Resources: Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: This month is Mental Health Awareness Month, and I want to take some time to talk about something that is so important but often misunderstood—mental health, especially in the context of our faith. For too long, mental health struggles have been shrouded in stigma—especially in Christian circles. Maybe you’ve heard things like: “You just need to pray more.” “If you had more faith, you wouldn’t struggle.” “Christians shouldn’t be anxious or depressed.” Have you ever heard these statements? Maybe you’ve even said them yourself at some point. The problem is, these kinds of messages aren’t biblical, and they can actually do more harm than good. So today, we’re going to break the stigma surrounding mental health in the church. We’ll talk about: What the Bible really says about mental health Why struggling with mental health doesn’t mean you lack faith How we as believers can better support those who are hurting I pray that today’s episode will encourage you and help bring light to a topic that desperately needs to be discussed. Quotables from the episode: Some people believe that if we’re struggling emotionally, we must be failing spiritually. But that’s just not true. The Bible is full of stories of faithful men and women who wrestled with deep emotional pain: David, a man after God’s own heart, poured out his despair in the Psalms. He wrote in Psalm 42:5 (NIV), "Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." Elijah, a mighty prophet, was so overwhelmed with despair that he asked God to take his life (1 Kings 19:4). Job, a righteous man, suffered so much that he wished he had never been born (Job 3:11). Even Jesus Himself experienced deep sorrow. Isaiah 53:3 calls Him "a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief." The presence of mental and emotional struggles does not mean we lack faith. It means we are human. God doesn’t dismiss our struggles—He meets us in them. Psalm 34:18 says, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." If you’re struggling today, I want you to hear this: God sees you. He cares. And He does not condemn you for your pain. Can God heal? Absolutely.Does God answer prayer? Without a doubt.But does struggling with mental health mean you’re failing as a Christian? Not at all. Think about physical health. If someone has diabetes, do we tell them, “Just pray more, and your blood sugar will be fine”? Of course not! We encourage them to seek medical treatment, eat well, and take care of their body—all while trusting God for healing. The same applies to mental health. Anxiety, depression, and other struggles are not signs of spiritual weakness. They are real, complex conditions that can be caused by many factors—biology, trauma, stress, spiritual warfare, and more. Seeking help—whether through counseling, medication, or other means—doesn’t mean you lack faith. It means you are taking wise steps toward healing. James 1:5 tells us, "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." Wisdom includes knowing when we need help—and being humble enough to receive it. If you’re struggling, please know this: Your pain does not disqualify your faith. Your struggles do not define you. God is not disappointed in you—He is with you in the struggle. So, how can we, as the body of Christ, do better in supporting those who are struggling with mental health? 1. Stop the Stigma Let’s be careful with our words. Let’s stop shaming people for their struggles. Often, people can figure out what to DO for someone, but they often stumble over what to SAY. In my private practice, and through my own personal struggles, I’ve found this to be a huge stumbling block. There are definitely things NOT to say: “It’s all in your head.” “Snap out of it.” “Pull yourself up by your bootstraps.”(All of these things convey a lack of sensitivity to the pain they are experiencing. You’d never say these things to someone who has cancer, and depression is just as much a medical diagnosis.) “This too shall pass.”(That is true, but it doesn’t make someone struggling with depression feel any better. Even a tornado passes, but it leaves damage and devastation in its wake.) “What doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.”(First of all, many with depression consider suicide, so it’s never a good idea to joke about dying. Secondly, most with depression don’t care about getting stronger, they just want to survive.) “Others are worse off than you.”(Isn’t this true for everyone? But saying that doesn’t even acknowledge the pain the person with depression is in. And why is their pain any less valid?) “I know how you feel.”(If you’ve never struggled with depression, you don’t know how they feel. Even if you have experienced depression, the situation and symptoms and complicating factors may be entirely different. It’s better not to even try to compare.) Helpful things TO say: “I love you.”The person with depression often can’t love themselves much less believe that others love them. They need to hear this now more than ever, even if they don’t believe it. “I’m here for you.”Someone struggling with depression feels so alone. They need to know that others care enough to be present with them in their pain, rather than trying to fix it. “You are important to me.”When struggling with depression, self-esteem is often at risk. They feel all alone and need the assurance that their standing in your eyes and your life doesn’t change just because of the depression. “I’m sorry you’re hurting.”While I do not recommend saying you know how someone feels, I do suggest you offer kindness, compassion, and concern for their pain. “Is there something I can do for you?”Often, our actions speak louder than words. When you offer to help, you enter into their pain. They may not know how you can help, but by asking the question, you open up the opportunity for dialogue. “You may not believe this now, but you won’t always feel this way.”When one is struggling with depression, the whole world looks black, and the future seems to offer only more of the same. It can be helpful to encourage them that this is a season, and they won’t always be in this place. “What might help you feel better?”This can help them start to think pro-actively about things that help, and can clue you in on how you can support them. For example, if they mention that they always feel better after a walk, offer to walk with them. “What might be making your depression worse?”This can help them step back and take a look at things they need to change (e.g. sleeping too late in the morning may leave them feeling lethargic and sluggish all day, so setting an alarm to get up earlier might combat that), and can also help you better know how to support and pray for them. “We will get through this together.”Depression can leave one feeling incredibly lonely, isolated, and as if no one cares or understands. This simple statement conveys support. You aren’t trying to change them or solve the problem, just be present.Remember, someone else’s experience with depression isn’t your fault and you can’t “fix it” for them-only God can do that. But you can support. Say nothing.Words get us into trouble so often, when really, just being present often conveys much greater support than having the perfect thing to say or advice to try to make things better. 2. Encourage Professional Help God has gifted counselors, therapists, and doctors with wisdom to help. Seeking help is not a lack of faith—it’s an act of wisdom. 3. Offer Practical Support Mental health struggles can be isolating. A simple text, meal, or kind word can mean the world to someone who’s struggling. While we can be prone to feel helpless to help someone with depression, particularly if we have never experienced it ourselves, there are some practical things we can do to help: Enter into their experience with them and be present. Offer to make a doctor’s appointment for them, and offer to go with them. Make plans with them. Even if they decline, keep offering. Ask how you can pray for them, and pray with them. Remain encouraging and positive. Meet tangible needs (i.e. car pool, pick up grocery items, run errands). Be willing to just sit and be with them. Convey there is hope. Pray With and For Them Prayer is powerful. Instead of saying “Just pray more,” Pray with and for them. But let’s not use it as a substitutefor real support. Let’s walk alongside those who are hurting. Galatians 6:2 says, "Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." Let’s be a community that lifts each other up, rather than tearing each other down. Friend, if you are struggling today, I want you to know: You are not alone. Your mental health matters. Your pain does not define you. And God has not abandoned you. If you need help, please don’t suffer in silence. Reach out to a trusted friend, pastor, counselor, or doctor. You are worthy of support and healing. And if you know someone who is struggling, I encourage you to be the hands and feet of Jesus to them. Let’s break the stigma. Let’s create a church culture where it’s okay to not be okay—because that’s where healing begins. Scripture References: Psalm 42:5 (NIV), "Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." Psalm 34:18 says, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." James 1:5 tells us, "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." Galatians 6:2 says, "Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." Recommended Resources: Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host: For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, Rhonda Stoppe shares her Sacred Scar Story of finding hope in the midst of postpartum depression and hormonal imbalance. What began as a season of silent suffering—marked by deep shame, emotional exhaustion, and the sense that no one understood—eventually led her to the help she desperately needed. Now, Rhonda offers encouragement and truth to women facing similar struggles, reminding them they’re not alone and that healing begins when we bring our pain into the light. Quotables from the episode: Living in that one-bedroom house, without electricity, with three children I was so overwhelmed. It wasn’t depression exactly, but I was completely overwhelmed. I was lying in my kids’ bunkbed with the door closing, weeping, when my husband came home and found me like that. He asked what was wrong with me, and I didn’t know. It was just too hard. It was a very dark season for me. I didn’t know that it was post-partum depression—I just knew I was frail, and I was fragile. Slowly, that post-partum turned into PMS/PMD. I remember not being the mom I wanted to be. Two weeks out of the month I wasn’t myself, and then two weeks out of the month I was myself. We lived behind a locked gate on a ranch, so I could hide. So whenever I wasn’t myself, and I couldn’t live my life “out there,” I just stayed home within the locked gate. Imagine if you’re a werewolf, and imagine if every full moon, you were going to turn into a werewolf and you couldn’t stop it, you couldn’t stop that werewolf from taking over your body, and the only hope you had was if someone would lock you in a cage until the full moon passed so you didn’t eat your young. That is what my experience was like with PMS. Before I experienced it, I had said to my mom and to my sister who struggled with it, “Oh come on, you’re just using that as an excuse to hurt people with your words.” Now, I knew enough to not hurt people with my words. Instead, I would pull back. During those times the only fruit of the spirit that I seemed to have was self-control, and I could keep hurtful words from coming out of my mouth that I couldn’t take back. I told my husband that the best way he could help me was to let me pull away in my bedroom, while he played with the kids, and let me just get through it. I would be in my room with my Bible open in my lap, reading, praying and asking God to help me. I felt so ashamed because I knew the Lord and I had the Holy Spirit in me. What happens with a hormonal imbalance is a real medical condition that occurs and can play itself out in a way that you can be very sinful in how you let yourself respond to it. I felt shame, I felt alone, I felt lonely, I felt like no one else was going through what I was going through. I think it’s silent suffering that we often go through as Christian women because it feels so shameful when we have the Holy Spirit but we don’t know why we cannot get a handle on this. What makes it so hard is that we are so ashamed about it, so we don’t want to talk about it because we don’t know anyone else who is going through it so we think we are alone, so then the message we hear is “what’s wrong with ME?” That just brings on more guilt, shame, remorse, regret, fear, and isolation. The isolation is about the worse thing we can do. We need to talk about it so that people know they’re not alone. The enemy convinced me I was all alone, nobody understands, and I was going to have to figure this all out on my own. I ultimately found help when I went to an endocrinologist who specialized in hormonal disorders. She gave me medication that balanced out my hormonal levels throughout the month. My sacred scars came out of this experience because now I can comfort others with what has comforted me. Whenever I share my story, women are desperate to talk to me because they feel so alone and don’t think anyone can understand the struggle, and for some, it’s ruining their marriages. The whole essence of the book Sacred Scars is that God didn’t cause our pain and suffering, but He will use it for good. Even now, my husband, Steve, who is a pastor, can help other men whose wives are going through it, because Steve went through it with me and can understand. Initially, in my pride, I didn’t want others to know about my frailty, but if God can use my frailty to help someone else, who am I to not let Him use my sacred scars to help someone else who’s desperate to know they aren’t alone. Don’t try to find someone to blame for how you’re feeling right now. Recognize what is going on in your body. It’s no one’s fault; you don’t have to find someone to blame for why you’re sad or why you’re mad or why you’re triggered. It’s a hormonal fluctuation and you need to decide how to take care of you and not assign blame or fault for why you feel this way. There is hope and there is help. Find a medical professional who specializes in hormonal imbalances. Don’t give up. Find someone you can trust who you can talk to about it. Isolating yourself makes it worse. Don’t give up and don’t suffer silently. Satan keeps our secrets and makes us feel shame, so when we share it, it disarms his hold on us. Find a safe person to share this with. You need to be careful who you share this with because some people haven’t earned your trust or the right to hear those intimate personal details. Recommended Resources: How to Deal with Hormonal Imbalances That Affect Your Marriage Real-Life Romance: Inspiring Stories to Help You Believe in True Love by Rhonda Stoppe Moms Raising Sons to be Men by Rhonda Stoppe If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy: And Other Myths Women Believe by Rhonda Stoppe The Marriage Mentor: Becoming the Couple You Long to Be by Rhonda Stoppe A Christian Woman’s Guide to Great Sex in Marriage by Rhonda Stoppe Text NOREGRETS to 55444 to access the free video “God uses ordinary people” Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Rhonda Stoppe: Website / Facebook / Instagram / Twitter / LinkedIn / Pinterest For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Rhonda Stoppe is the Best-Selling Author of 7 books. For more than 30 years Rhonda has helped thousands of women build no regrets lives! Rhonda is a highly sought after Speaker and a popular voice in the Christian Living Community. Rhonda ministers alongside her husband Steve, who for 20 years has pastored First Baptist Church of Patterson, California. They live out their own Real Life Romance writing books and speaking at their No Regrets Marriage Conferences, but their favorite ministry is their family. They have four grown children and 10 grandchildren. To learn more about Rhonda’s speaking topics, watch her teaching and to book Rhonda for your next event visit: NoRegretsWoman.com Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, we continue our Sacred Scar Story Series, where we talk with individuals who have experienced deep pain, but have also seen God bring healing and redemption. My guest, Phylis Mantelli, shares her journey of growing up with a narcissistic, alcoholic mother in a chaotic and abusive environment—facing stress, shame, and secrets from an early age. Despite a childhood marked by dysfunction, trauma, and loss, Phyllis eventually chose to pursue healing and break the cycle of generational pain in her own family. Through honest reflection, deep faith, and intentional work, she now helps other women confront their own “mother wounds” and embrace the truth that God can transform even our most painful stories into something sacred. You’ll be encouraged by her transparency, wisdom, and hope-filled perspective. Quotables from the episode: Some of your hardest stories become the very thing that you are able to help others through if you can find healing for yourself. I was raised by a dysfunctional, alcoholic, narcissistic mom and everyday was living on the edge of stress, and shame, and secrets. My mom kidnapped us, my dad came home to an empty house with no family. It took him three and a half months to find us. At eight years old, we moved in with my mother’s boyfriend, my sister’s father, and started a whole new life. Imagine being plucked out of your childhood and everything you’ve known and you’re just supposed to start a new school the next day like nothing is going on. My mom had violence in her relationships our entire lives, so we witnessed violence growing up—we were physically and verbally abused. Growing up, being told to be strong and not tell anyone about it, I didn’t realize it until many years later that I’m actually a very highly sensitive person but because I was taught to be tough, I became a really strong coverer of all kinds of wounds. So I had a lot of rage but I didn’t even realize that’s what it was. With secrets, you think that you’re the only person going through things. There was so much shame attached to that that I never shared my story with anyone. After 61 years, I was finally able to grieve my story. And I realized that I’m not alone and there are many other women who have gone through similar things and I want to learn how to help them. Through trial and error, and being able to say the words, “I’m sorry” and “tell me more,” I was able to deep conversations with my daughters and break off that generational dysfunction. It takes work, and that’s the kind of thing I love to do in my ministry, by helping other women get to that place. I became a Christian at 35, and I realized that my life is worthy. I am loved because I am a child of God and He has always had his hand on me. I felt God through all the trials in my life and even in the things I did wrong. I didn’t love myself…I wanted someone to love me, and now I know that God does. I needed to say “no more” for looking for outside sources to love me. I had to love myself and I spent a lot of time on the floor crying out to God. It’s not about the stuff you do. It’s about the heart of where you are. God hears you and loves you. You don’t have to do X, Y, Z to earn his love. You have to look back over your history and realize someone has been carrying you even through all the muck, and that means they love you. Shame sounds like, “If they find out your secrets, they are never going to like you and they are going to fun from you.” When you hold onto secrets, it’s like a little gift inside your body that is so tight that it’s ready to explode, and that’s a gift Satan wants you to not open up because he knows that once you open it up and let it out, no matter what, it holds no power over you anymore. Tell your story to safe people. Secrets have to come out. You cannot get to a place of peace until healing takes place in your body. Satan likes to tell us all the things we aren’t, but God loves to tell us all the things we are. Nothing will separate us from his love. If you really want to heal, you have to start doing things differently. You can’t keep doing things the same way and expect a different result—it’s likely not going to happen. We have to choose to pursue our healing. God isn’t going to force it on us. Every family is different so don’t do the comparison thing and think “I want to be like that family over there.” Do what works for you. Where you are and what works for your family and brings your family peace and comfort may not look like others. God is giving you God-kisses in the most gentle of ways and we have to open our eyes to see it even in the midst of great struggle. Scripture References: Psalm 91:11 “For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways.” Recommended Resources: Unmothered: Life With a Mom Who Couldn’t Love Me by Phylis Mantelli Dysfunctional Mother Daughter Relationships: Hope for Breaking the Cycle—Episode 108 Healing Dysfunctional Relationships Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Phylis Mantelli: Podcast / Website / Instagram / YouTube / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Phylis Mantelli is the author of the book “Unmothered” Life with a Mom Who Couldn’t Love Me. She is an inspirational speaker at churches, retreats, conventions, Celebrate Recovery groups, and rotary groups. She is the host of the Unmothered Podcast. She is currently writing her 2nd book on lessons of how to break generational dysfunction. She loves helping and coaching women reach their full God-given potential despite their trauma-filled past. www.phylismantelli.com Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Host Matt Fisher talks to Ryan Bengtson, CEO, Panda Health about the State of digital health market; evolving perceptions of digital health; refinement of utilization of digital health; intersection of health equity and digital health; impact of economic uncertainty on digital health. To stream our Station live 24/7 visit www.HealthcareNOWRadio.com or ask your Smart Device to “….Play Healthcare NOW Radio”. Find all of our network podcasts on your favorite podcast platforms and be sure to subscribe and like us. Learn more at www.healthcarenowradio.com/listen

Episode Summary: In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, author Rachel Wojo joins me to share how prayer sustains us through life’s hardest challenges. From heartbreaking loss to seasons of silence, Rachel opens up about the desperate prayers that carried her through—and the surprising power of just three simple words. You’ll be encouraged to let go of prayer perfectionism, lean into honest conversation with God, and discover hope that holds—even in the dark. Rachel shares the journey that inspired her book, Desperate Prayers: Embracing the Power of Prayer in Life’s Darkest Moments, and how the cries of biblical “desperados” mirror our own today. With vulnerability, she reflects on the grief of losing her daughter, Taylor, and the truth she had to whisper to her heart to keep going. If you've ever wondered how to pray when words fail, this conversation will remind you that God hears—even the smallest cries. Quotables from the episode: When I was a young adult, I grew up in a beautiful Christian home, went to Christian college, graduated, went on to teach in a Christian school, married a preacher boy, and so the white picket fence dream was just in sight. You know, I thought that I would be a pastor's wife and we would have a beautiful family and God would just use us to reach so many people across the world. And then I found out that my preacher husband was having an affair for four of the five years that we had been married. I discovered then that my special needs daughter who had been born during that time had more than just developmental delays, and her actual diagnosis was a rare metabolic disorder that would result in a lifespan of approximately 10 to 15 years is what they gave us at the time. And so your dreams just come crashing down with all of those dilemmas, and you wonder, "Is God real?" Desperate prayers became the cry of my heart early on. It would take a couple of decades. Taylor lived for 22 years. We had her much longer than the anticipated time, and my heart grew to just love the Lord so, so much and embrace His hope and His peace, His mercy and grace throughout Taylor's lifetime. God did give me an opportunity to remarry, and our beautiful redemption story includes five more children, so God has been gracious to us. But I know that when people are in hurting, dark situations like what I've just shared — whether it's divorce, disease, death, discouragement, depression, all of those big D words — they just bring us to a point of: do we trust God enough with how we're feeling to go to Him? Simple three-word prayers are powerful. They are powerful. We oftentimes feel like we have to have all the right words, and so we don't go to God in prayer because we can't even think of what we should say. Just boiling it down to simple three words — as I was walking through my daughter's suffering for so many years — I needed something I could remember. My brain fog was very prevalent during those years, and even afterwards, the grief caused that fog. I just needed some simple wording that I could hold on to. I realized that a conversation between God and me — it's just me and Him, right? It's just words between me and Him. So I simplified it: Address Him: "God" Add a verb for the need End with "me" Some of those very simple three-word prayers are: God hold me God heal me God revive me God show me God guide me Just asking Him to do what I couldn't do for myself. When we use the three-word prayer, we're admitting that He is God and we are not. We're not in control, as much as we want to be. And so those three-word prayers can really simplify our plan, our hearts, our minds, but they also can be deeply profound because God takes those words to His heart — and that's where His power steps in. Sometimes when I'm in those desperate seasons, I can have a really short memory of what God has already done in my life - which is why I'm so grateful for the Bible. Because even when I can't remember what God has done for me, we've got countless accounts of what God has done for other people. And in each chapter of Desperate Prayers, you focus on one Bible character that you call a desperado, and being from Texas, I love that. What do the desperate prayers of the Bible have in common with our prayers today? When I read those prayers, I get so excited because: They didn’t have their acts together — and neither do we have to. We all come to God in brokenness, in desperate need, in a state of destitution. I used to think that word "destitution" meant you had to physically have nothing, but there's spiritual destitution and emotional constitution and so many areas of our lives where we're just experiencing an emptiness, a void, and we need God. When I look at those Bible characters, I see men and women who recognized that looking up was the only way out. Whether the issue is infertility like Hannah, rejection like Hagar, or the many emotions David shares throughout the Psalms — no matter what the issue, we can take it to God. I take a lot of encouragement from those desperadoes. I had a little post-it note on my desk that said "Drop prayer perfectionism." It was a reminder that I don't have to have the words together. As an introverted person — an extroverted introvert — I can eventually articulate things, but my words often come out better on paper. That’s why I choose to prayer journal a lot. I'm so thankful that we don't have to have perfect words to go to God. He accepts them as they are. And when we don't have any words at all, that's when it’s amazing to see how He's already provided, even when we don't know what we need. Anyone who has lost a loved one — especially a child — knows this isn't the way God intended life to be lived. The very first parents, Adam and Eve, lost a child. And so I had to tell myself — probably the same thing Eve had to tell herself after Cain killed Abel: "I did not die when my son died. God has a plan for me." Those are the words I had to speak to myself: I did not die when my daughter died. God has a plan for me. It was a really difficult thing to tell myself. Because when you say that, you admit the truth: you would rather not live without your child. I appreciate so much that you say we need to speak truth to ourselves — even out loud. Because in times of greatest desperation, we're vulnerable to the enemy's lies. Speaking truth out loud: Reminds ourselves of the truth. Strengthens faith ("Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God" — Romans 10:17). Places that stake in the sand so that the enemy knows: we're going to speak that truth, even when it's hard. You can say anything to the Lord — and it will be fine. It’s really a posture of turning your heart toward Him. Even just simply calling out the name Jesus is a prayer — and I have done that many times. If you have no words — if you can't figure out what to pray — then invite Jesus into the space where you are. He longs to be present with you. He is already there. By making that invitation, you ask for His supernatural strength, mercy, and grace to surround and comfort you. When we turn our hearts toward Him — that powerful posture of prayer yields the pathway to peace. Prayer is the channel that allows us to place our hope on Him — a place where hope is accepted, loved, honored, cherished — and it shifts our perspective. Because most of us need a perspective shift in order to experience peace. And that's what prayer does for us. God wants to do so much more than answer our prayers. He wants to be the answer to our prayers. Those are two totally different things. A lot of us want our prayers answered — and He is a prayer-answering God. I've seen miracles. I know you have too, Michelle. We've witnessed them. But more than answering, He wants to be the answer. When we rely on Him, our perspective changes —from the here and now to what matters for eternity. Friends, I hope you heard that: More than answering your prayers, God wants to be the answer for you. Scripture References: 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 encourages “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” Romans 8:26 encourages us “Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Colossians 4:2 tells us how to handle life’s darkest seasons: “Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving.” Recommended Resources: Desperate Prayers: Embracing the Power of Prayer in Life’s Darkest Moments by Rachel Wojo Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Rachel Wojo: Website / Facebook / X / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / LinkedIn For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Rachel Wojo is an inspirational author, speaker, and podcaster. Through her biblical approach and personal life experiences, Rachel empowers women to discover strength and hope in everyday situations. Despite enduring the loss of her mother, adult special needs daughter, and father, Rachel remains resilient. Rachel is deeply in love with her husband, Matt, and cherishes her motherhood with six children on earth and two in heaven. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, we are continuing the Sacred Scar Story Series during which I’ve had the blessing to interview many people who have experienced some very painful wounds, but then saw God heal and do a redemptive work and bring about beautiful sacred scars. Maureen Miller shares about her devastatingly painful wound when she had dreamed of becoming a mother since early childhood only to have doctors report that short of the miraculous, she would be unable to conceive. She shares how she coped with her pain and her grief, and how God ultimately fulfilled her dream of motherhood through adoption. Quotables from the episode: Everyone has a story about something that has wounded them and caused pain. My scars have been more emotional scars having to do with the loss of a dream since I was a little girl, of being mom and so looking forward to having children and being able to do all the things that moms love to do with their kids. I married my high school sweetheart and not long after that we realized we were going to have difficulty conceiving. It was painful to hear a doctor say that short of the miraculous, you will never have children biologically. Those words felt like the death of a dream and cut very deeply. Having been raised in a Christian home, and having a good grounding in biblical truth and God’s promises, it wasn’t long before I really began seeking the Lord and asking him how he might use this pain for something good and bring something beautiful out of my broken body. I mourned and I grieved the death of that childhood dream that I had held onto so tightly. There was a season when I shook my fist at God, but it wasn’t a long season. As I began to delight myself in the Lord, and be real with him, and at times even shake my fist, he can not only handle all my doubts and fears and anger, but he can even pry open my hands that were clenching that dream. He began to show me that as I prayed with my hands up and open, he could either take that dream away and replace it with something better, or he could grant me that dream in some miraculous way. As I meditated on the scripture and began to delight in the Lord, it didn’t mean that God would always answer our prayers in the way we wanted them answered, but he would actually fill our hearts with the dreams he had for us first and those would become our dream. As I mourned then sought the Lord and delighted in Him first, He began to show me that it was his dream for me to be a mom—it just didn’t look like I thought it would. We have the choice when we are wounded to either turn toward God and seek him or turn away and walk in the other direction. There was shame because I had to really remind myself that my identity as a woman was not wrapped up in me being a life-giver. My identity came in Christ and who he created me to be. The Lord confirmed for me that I was “blessed in my barrenness.” Our pain became a catalyst for me to offer sympathy, comfort, and help for those he places in our paths. I realized I had the ability to minister to birth mothers who chose life for their children, carry them for 9 months, and then give others the greatest gift of life they could ever give. When God impressed upon me that I was “blessed in my barrenness,” I realized my condition wasn’t a mistake and that God had given me a heart to sympathize and empathize with those who are hurting. Over time we were able to adopt three children, but we also experienced the pain of two failed adoptions that have their own sacred scars and round out our story. It’s a beautiful thing when we’re able to hold up our dream and offer it to God and say “Take this dream if it’s not yours, and you have something better, or if it is your dream, confirm it so I can walk it out in faith and joy knowing it’s according to your will.” Delight yourself in the Lord. Spend time with Him in His Word. Spend time with God in prayer. Surround yourself with Christian brothers and sisters who can really speak into your life and confirm the truth. Know your identity in Christ and surround yourself with people who will remind you of that. Trust that according to Romans 8:28, God will work all things together for good for those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose. Journal so you can go back and look at the “stones of remembrance” and you can remember how God answered prayers. Once I surrender my will and my way, God has the freedom to work His perfect will, in His perfect way, and in His perfect timing. Scripture References: Psalm 37:4-6 NIV “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun.” Romans 8:28 NIV “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Recommended Resources: Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Maureen Miller: Website / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Maureen Miller has been married to her childhood sweetheart Bill for 35 years. Together they have three born-in-their-hearts children and three grand-girls and share life on Selah Farm, a hobby homestead in western NC. She writes for Guideposts, her local newspaper, and several online devotion sites, and her debut novel, Gideon’s Book, is due to release later this year. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In this episode, my co-host, Rev. Jessica Van Roekel and I reflect on the journey from the darkness of Good Friday to the redemption of Resurrection Sunday. For Jesus’s disciples and followers, Good Friday marked a day of despair, while Saturday felt like a wilderness of uncertainty. Yet, Resurrection Sunday brought the hope of resurrection, redemption, and purpose. Together, we’ll examine how these themes resonate in our own lives when we walk through dark seasons and wilderness experiences, and how we can hold onto hope, knowing that redemption is always possible through Christ. Quotables from the episode: Even though Jesus warns us we will experience trials, they often take us by surprise just like Jesus’s death did for the disciples. Nothing happens to us that isn’t first sifted through God’s hand. God has a plan, sees the whole picture, and offers his comfort. Prayer and lament: Honest communication with God, expressing pain, confusion, and doubt. Meditate on Scripture: reflecting on Bible passages that highlight God’s faithfulness in difficult situations. Practice gratitude: remember past instances of God’s provision as encouragement for the present trials. Fasting: set aside time for fasting to seek clarity, alight with God’s will, or pursue deeper spiritual intimacy. Worship and praise: praise God for who He is, even when circumstances feel bleak. Community and Fellowship: share your struggles with trusted believers who can pray and provide encouragement. Silence and solitude: spend intentional quiet time with God, listening for his voice and his presence. Remembering God’s faithfulness: reflect on his unchanging nature and promises. God often uses our darkest moments to bring about the greatest redemption. Lean into God’s promises during dark and wilderness seasons. Look for glimpses of God’s redemptive work, even when it feels far off. Remember that life’s trials often follow the pattern of Good Friday, Saturday, and Resurrection Sunday. The darkness of despair can give way to the wilderness of waiting, but the story doesn’t end there. Resurrection Sunday reminds us that hope and redemption are always on the horizon. No matter what season you’re in, trust that God is at work, bringing beauty out of ashes and life out of death. Scripture References: Luke 23:44-46 (The darkness of Good Friday) Isaiah 43:19 (God’s work in the wilderness) John 20:1-18 (The resurrection on Easter Sunday) Romans 8:28 (God’s redemptive purposes) Recommended Resources: Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: A recent survey of 15,000 workers across 15 countries found that a quarter of all workers experienced burnout symptoms, but many don’t recognize it for what it is until after the crash has occurred. Join me with Dr. Jonathan Hoover, author of Stress Fracture: Your Ultimate Guide to Beating Burnout. Together, we will unpack the root causes of burnout and explore how it impacts physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Dr. Hoover shares actionable strategies and faith-based insights for recognizing stress fractures in life and taking steps to heal holistically. With practical advice, scientific understanding, and a focus on hope, this episode will equip you to overcome burnout and restore balance, resilience, and joy. Quotables from the episode: We can go from being okay to not being okay really quickly. Burnout is a legitimate path straight to depression. I found out that it’s (burnout) not a unique situation. It happens a lot, and especially even to people that we would look up to as incredibly productive people. It is very, very common, especially amongst highly productive individuals, because we have a tendency to even push through our body's normal signals that, hey, you need a rest. We kind of push through and go, I'll take time for a rest after I get this done, after I get that done and we don't take the time. But I think what is hard and your example of your father's experience is that often we don't see the early signs of burnout and we don't recognize it for what it is until after we've hit rock bottom. Burnout specifically tends to happen to people that are very driven. And we want to do lots of things and we want to take on the world and we dream big and we execute big. But sometimes we execute beyond what God is calling us to do. And we have to grieve the fact that there are lots of good things we could do but Paul taught us that not everything I could do is something I should do. There is something about the emotions we experience that are at the core of who we are as a person. And we sort of use that emotional capital in understanding how other people feel, sharing with them how we feel, using our emotions to achieve goals, exercising our emotions to be Christ -like. I mean, tells us about Jesus' emotion. So often we see that Jesus was compassionate. That is an emotion. And there is a season where Jesus wants to get off by himself because there wasn't even enough time for them to eat. Him and his disciples didn't even have enough time to eat. But what you see is that what was he tired of doing? He was giving of himself emotionally. There was this compassion, there was the desire to help people who were struggling. And we don't realize in our daily life how much emotional capital we are doling out from our emotional wallet. When it comes to caring about our kids, caring about our spouse, caring about our job, putting our passion and energy into our life's calling and At some point what can happen is we can write those emotional checks beyond what the balance is in the account That's what happens with burnout is and that's why it can start with such a benevolent and well-meaning direction in life. I want to give as much of myself as I can to as many people as I possibly can I want to accomplish big things, nothing wrong with any of that, until we write a check that's bigger than the balance. And then what happens is, this is something that we're still trying to figure out psychologically. There is a sort of, of last straw that happens with emotions. We haven't figured it out yet, but you go from being okay to not being okay very fast, very fast. And that is I think what is so challenging when you work with people as I do who are burned out is one day they're doing fine, and then the next day they're not. I like to treat the analog of going to the gym as a good way of thinking about burnout. So if I'm going to the gym and I'm hurting myself because I'm pushing myself beyond my limits. So let's say I go and I try to lift too much weight or something like that. I have three options for how to deal with it. I could, one, reduce the weight that I'm lifting. So sometimes when I work with people who are burned out, my first suggestion is let's try to figure out what we can delegate that you do. Let's figure out how to get you doing what only you can do and find a way to get people, other people to help you do what other people could do. Sometimes I have to work with people to say, well, the reason it's so difficult for you is it has to be perfect. Perfectionists tend to get burned out faster than anybody else. So we have to learn that science of good enough. Burnout can happen in a lot of arenas. It can happen in marriage. It doesn't have to be work. But whatever arena I'm burning out in, the question is, am I doing healthy things away from that arena to help me fight that more challenging battle in that one zone? Signs that you’re potentially facing burnout are massive exhaustion. There’s a difference between being exhausted and being tired. Tired is normal. Tired helps me know I need to rest. The difference between being tired and being exhausted is like when you’re driving down the road and the little gas light comes on, that's tired. If you are on the side of the road and literally your car won't start because there's no gas in it, that's exhausted. So there's a big difference between saying, "I really should rest," and saying, "I have nothing left to give anyone." That's exhaustion. When you start to feel like, "I don't have anything to give anybody," huge sign there, a burnout. So there are a lot of things that people wouldn't necessarily immediately tie to burnout that absolutely can be related. Digestive issues can be related to burnout, migraine headaches, shoulder and neck tension. Anything that ends in itis, pick up a medical manual when you're at your bookstore, look for anything that ends in itis. That is a bodily inflammation illness of some sort. Some, if it ends in itis, inflammation is at the root of it. And we know that stress causes bodily inflammation. So I make myself more likely to have those itis conditions by allowing stress to get out of hand. There are some cognitive things to look for. Burnout effects are working memory. So you have that kind of memory thing where it's sort of like a whiteboard. You can throw some numbers up there, an idea up there, but you don't need it long. You just need it for a second. And we have that in our memory where we can just hold something briefly. And when we're stressed out, that takes a huge hit. I mean, all of us have that experience where you're walking down the hallway and you're like, wait, what did I, what was I doing? Like, why did I come down this hallway? We all have that. But if it happens three or four times more than usual, so you constantly, like all the time, you're finding yourself going, well, I was thinking about something and I lost my train of thought. I was trying to walk down here. I forgot what I was going for. And you just realize, like, I don't remember things nearly as well as I normally do. That's a sign. Listen to people that love you. That's a big one. So when your spouse says, I'm worried about you, don't let that just roll off. Pay attention, right? And know that they care about you. The first thing I always tell anybody who's really thinking “I'm going through burnout” is you need to make three appointments. Just do it now. Just do it now. First appointment needs to be with your doctor. Get with your primary care physician, set up an appointment to go see them, get a checkup, let them know any symptoms you might be experiencing, physical symptoms, let them know that you're going through a season of stress. Have them check you out physically. Make an appointment with a therapist. Sit down with a counselor, a professional counselor, walk through what it is that you're going through. And then finally, make an appointment with a spiritual advisor. That could be your pastor to talk about your spiritual condition. Scripture References: Mark 4:38 “Jesus was sleeping at the back of the boat with his head on a cushion. The disciples woke him up, shouting, “Teacher, don’t you care that we’re going to drown?” Recommended Resources: Stress Fracture: Your Ultimate Guide to Beating Burnout by Jonathan Hoover, Ph.D. Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Dr. Jonathan Hoover: Website / Facebook / LinkedIn / Instagram For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Dr. Jonathan Hoover serves as the senior associate pastor of NewSpring Church in Wichita, Kansas. He also works as an assistant professor at Regent University’s School of Psychology and Counseling, where he is the director of the master of science in psychology program. He lives in Wichita, Kansas, with his wife, Wendy, and daughters, Cheyenne and Summer. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, I’m joined by my friend, Pastor Jessica Van Roekel, as we talk about something so many of us are facing today—the growing challenges of stress and a work-life balance that feels anything but balanced. Together, we share from our personal stories, our professional backgrounds, and, most importantly, from a place of faith. We offer practical strategies to help you reclaim peace, set healthy boundaries, and redefine what true success looks like. My hope is that through our honest conversation, you’ll be reminded that grace and flexibility are available, and that lasting peace is found when we anchor our lives in faith. Quotables from the episode: Stress is something we all face to a greater or lesser extent. We live in a culture that promotes “If it’s going to be, it’s up to me” but if we aren’t careful to attend to appropriate stress management, prolonged stress can have a detrimental impact on our physical, emotional, mental well-being. If we go too long, for too strong, ultimately our bodies will demand we stop. So how do we work toward better work-life balance? Stress comes from a variety of places, but if we don’t learn to manage stress, it will manage us. We as women struggle with the work/life balance in a unique way because culture tells us success is gained or lost in the workplace, yet we are often the primary caregivers for our family (including everything from laundry to holiday costume sewing to permission slip signing to kissing boo-boos). In 1970, about 43 percent of women ages 16 and older were in the labor force. By 2000, 61 percent of adult women were in the labor force and that has continued through today. Arguably, today women have more on their plates than a generation ago, with less down time to rest and restore. Stress is a physiological and psychological response that occurs when we perceive a threat or challenge that EXCEEDS OUR COPING RESOURCES. This perception triggers the body's CENTRAL STRESS MGMT SYSTEM, particularly the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis and the sympathetic nervous system (increased Heart Rate, Blood is directed to our muscles, increased alertness so you can face danger or run away) leading to the release of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. Once stress passes, the HPA axis should return to normal but often doesn’t because we live life in a heightened state of stress. Our brain doesn’t know the difference between good stress and bad stress. While this natural stress response is useful for short-term danger, chronic stress keeps these hormones elevated for extended periods, which can harm both mental and physical health. Perfect balance is a myth; instead, balance is fluid and flexible. Sometimes career demands take precedence, while other times, family needs do. Extending grace to yourself and adjusting priorities based on seasons of life can prevent both guilt and burnout. The myth of “multi-tasking”—it’s physiologically impossible for your brain to multitask. Physically, chronic stress can cause headaches, muscle tension, fatigue, and a weakened immune system. It also raises the risk of heart disease, high blood pressure, digestive issues, and sleep disturbances, impacting overall physical wellness. Stress has significant effects on brain function and structure. ACUTE stress can sharpen focus and improve short-term performance by enhancing activity in brain regions like the amygdala and prefrontal cortex. However, chronic stress can have adverse effects and lead to structural changes in the brain, such as a reduction in the size of the hippocampus (affecting memory) and prefrontal cortex (affecting decision-making and executive function), while potentially increasing the size and activity of the amygdala (heightening emotional responses). Chronic stress often leads to constant worry, difficulty concentrating, and memory issues. The brain, under prolonged stress, struggles to function optimally, making it harder to focus and think clearly. Emotionally, prolonged stress can lead to feelings of irritability, anxiety, and even hopelessness and despair. It can cause mood swings and may contribute to depression, as persistent stress wears down emotional resilience. Constant connectivity has been shown to increase stress, as people may feel pressured by comparisons, notifications, and the need to stay updated. Increased academic and career pressures, societal instability, and economic uncertainty can all contribute to heightened stress. Having too much on our plate in one arena of our life leading to insufficient time and energy to devote to other areas of our life can spur stress. Consider adopting both a weekly and daily planning ritual across both your work and personal life whereby you establish the top 10 priorities for the week, then the top 3 priorities for each day, while circling the non-negotiable tasks. This narrows our focus and reduces the overwhelm of a long to-do list. When we consider that stress arises when situations exceed our coping resources and anxiety results from a fear of losing control, if we lower our expectations of others it leads to decreased stress & anxiety when things don’t measure up. Also, we often expect more from ourselves than do others. If you were to list everything you expect of yourself in a day or week, would you reasonably expect the same from others? Set Boundaries: we teach people how to treat us, and part of that is by setting and respecting boundaries. This includes learning to say “no” or “not now” gracefully and asking for help without guilt. Furthermore, appropriate boundary setting includes prioritizing non-negotiable family time, reserving specific hours for work, and protecting time for self-care. Consider Self-Care as Non-Negotiable: Redefine self-care as essential for your mental and physical health, including basics like adequate nutrition, exercise, scheduled rest breaks throughout the day, and consistent sleep-hygiene. Self-care also includes self-compassion especially on challenging days. There are no perfect days, but how we talk to ourselves on both good and challenging days matters! Pay attention to your thoughts and assess if you would talk to a friend the way you talk to yourself? Adopt a growth mindset: understanding that true success includes inner peace and joy, not just career milestones. Redefine “Success” in the Context of Balance: Never has anyone said at the end of their life that they wish they’d worked more. Consider envisioning a successful life that includes time for loved ones, mental wellness, and personal fulfillment. Return to Faith as Your Foundation: Surrender control to God and stay anchored in faith. Scripture References: Ecclesiastes 3 Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Isaiah 30:15 “This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: “Only in returning to me and resting in me will you be saved. In quietness and confidence is your strength. But you would have none of it.” Psalm 23 Recommended Resources: Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: When we talk about wounds, pain, and scars, we need to remember that those come in the form of physical, emotional, relational, spiritual, grief and loss. This week’s guest, Kimberly Joy, shares of severe physical pain she endured after being hit by a car when she was out for a run, and the excruciating recovery she endured, but how she experienced God has her comfort and coach throughout her recovery. Her story is a powerful reminder of how to keep running with God after life hits you hard. I know you’ll be encouraged by her story! Quotables from the episode: Everybody I meet has gone through some painful trials, whether it's physical pain, relational pain or even spiritual pain or grief or loss. And what amazes me time and time again is that frequently those really painful trials that we've been through are an opportunity for God to use us to minister to others. Have you ever felt like what happened to you was like getting hit by a car? Well, I actually did get hit by a car! At the hospital, doctors said, “well, the good news is you've only broken bones. And they said, this is a miracle. We don't know how you have no internal organ damage, no spinal cord damage, no brain damage, no head injury. All you have are broken bones, but are you ready for the bad news? And I said, yeah, what's the bad news? They said you broke the two most painful bones in the human body, your pelvis and your ribs.” I was no stranger to pain. But I'm telling you, this pain was unlike anything I could even describe. I describe it as a thousand sharp objects being stabbed into my body in some medieval torture session. I just want to say this to your listeners, whether it's a relational, financial, physical, whatever, spiritual injury, the way that we immediately blame ourselves is so from the pit of hell, you know, that we would immediately heap condemnation right onto our wound. And that's what I did. And but I didn't blame God, and I wasn't mad at him. And I just thought the Lord is with me. I've done a lot of things with him that were hard. This is another thing that God and I are going to do together. That was my attitude. This is another thing God, and I are going to do together. And he's never failed me. So, he's going to not fail me now. And I had an attitude of faith, but also that underlying self -blame. The question to ask is who, not why. Who, Lord, do you want to be for me in this pain? Who is the question I've learned to ask, are you going to be my healer, my savior, my deliver, my friend, my comforter? Who are you going to be? And I already knew he was being my comforter. It was the most fearless season of my life, which made no sense, which proved to me. He was so with me, that peace that he gave me when I rolled up onto the hood of the car had not left me. **You can tell the size of your destiny by the size of your opposition. This pain, this problem is evidence of the size of your destiny. This is not evidence of your foolishness running out in the middle of the street. This is not evidence about how you do everything the hard way because I had to stay awake while I was being hit by a car. This is evidence of the size of your call. Previously, God told me to run. And so I thought, if I can run in the physical, I can run in the spirit. And my evidence, Michelle, was I crossed a finish line of a half marathon. One month later, I couldn't even walk. One month later, I came home in a wheelchair. And this was my enemy's direct and immediate assault on two things I did that put me closer to my destiny than I had ever been. So I decided that I was going to come back stronger, go further, and do it bigger. And Lord, whatever dream you put in my heart, stretch out the tent pegs, expand my borders, because if he thinks that he's going to kill me before I do what I was put on this earth to do, he's got another thing coming. And this holy indignation just rose up in me. The doctor came in the next morning and told me that it would take a year to recover from my injuries. What was in my mind was this message God had given me that this was a direct and immediate assault on my destiny. And I knew that this race that I had just run 30 days prior was happening again in 11 more months. And so, I looked at the doctor and I said, I'm going to be running a half marathon in 11 months. I ran that race in 11 months. Eleven months later, I crossed that finish line, that same one again. And this time, I cannot even tell you the emotion. I got a taste of what it's going to be like when we meet Jesus, and we cross our final finish line. I got a taste because I came out of such opposition, such pain, such limitation, such focus, such faith it took me to go from that bed to that finish line in 11 months. It was like such a metaphor for this walk with God, this race we're running with Christ. Paul said, run your race in such a way as to win. And I did that in the natural realm, but it made me see what it's going to be like when we meet him and we crossed that line. And when I crossed the finish line that day, I felt a victory. I do want to say that with all the faith that I had and all the trust I had in God, there was still some practical things I needed to do on my journey. And I heard someone say, if the counsel you're given isn't both spiritual and practical, then it's not spiritual at all. And I really, really stand as a testament of that, that God didn't just, you know, encourage me spiritually and give me promises in his word and comfort me. He pointed me to people that could help me with the practical things I needed to heal my body, my health, and the PTSD to deal with the fear that I had. What we go through, whether it's physical or emotional or relational or spiritual, that is not our not our identity. So often what I see and what I've experienced myself is that during those times when we are in the most painful trials, that is also the time when we are most susceptible to the enemy's lies. And that's why we have to lean into God. That's why we have to stay in this Word. And that's why we have to be around people who will speak truth when we're having a hard time recognizing that we're listening to a lie. My story is universal in that life hits you like you were hit by a car, life hits you with various kinds of pain, but Jesus called you to run your race with him. He's the best running coach. He's the best guide. He's the best father. He's the best friend. If you do this with him, he will lead you to everything you need to walk in your real identity. I kept saying to myself, this is my life right now, but this is temporary. I will heal. I will heal. I am on my way to healing. This is temporary. And then I would stop and say, thank you, Lord, that it's temporary, that this is not permanent. And I would remind myself to remind myself and to thank him. You're going to cross your finish line. And you're going to look back on what you overcame and say, look what God and I can do together. Look what we can do together. And that is such a beautiful hope -filled perspective because God doesn't want us to have to do it on our own. No. He wants us to lean into him, hold his hand, and move in forward direction. Realize that Jesus is your coach and that he wants you to run the race with him. Finish well. He doesn't want you to do it on your own. He says, “Come to me all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. And rest was part of Kimberly's training. And it may just be the part that God wants you to focus on right now. Recommended Resources: Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Kimberly Joy: Website / Facebook The Few Women / Instagram The Few Women / Instagram Kimberly Joy For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Kimberly Joy is celebrated as the award-winning Founder and Chief Executive Officer of The Fellowship of Extraordinary Women (FEW) International. She is on a mission to equip and empower professional Christian woman to fulfill their Kingdom assignments and divine destinies, and to leave lasting legacies in their faith, family, and finances. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In honor of International Happiness Day, join me as I sit down with Rev. Jessica Van Roekel to explore what it really means to count it all joy. As we reflect on personal experiences and biblical examples, we’ll highlight the distinction between circumstantial happiness and the deep, steadfast joy that comes from trusting God through trials. You’ll gain a deeper understanding of how joy can be a deliberate response to life’s challenges, cultivating faith and steadfastness. Whether you’re navigating hardship or seeking a renewed perspective, this conversation offers hope and encouragement to find joy in every circumstance. International Day of Happiness aims to make people around the world realize the importance of happiness within their lives. This day encourages people to spread happiness through a small action. But what happens when actions don’t cut it, and the feeling of happiness lasts mere seconds? What do we do when the idea of happiness seems far off and impossible? Quotables from the episode: I liken joy and happiness, the difference between that is that a river usually has a source. And A river can get filled up with mud and leaves and twigs and even beavers come along and build dams and so further on down the little stream, it's just dried up, rocky, dry bed. But if you follow that stream, you eventually come to the source and the source is where it just bubbles out. And that's how I liken happiness and joy is that joy is the source. My relationship with the Lord is my source of really life. It's my source of source of strength. It's my source of everything. The breath that I breathe comes from God and that is my joy. So, I can have these circumstances like postpartum where it felt like continue on with the analogy that streambed dried up. It's like the depression built this dam between the feelings of happiness and yet that joy, the source was still bubbling and still there. From a neuroscience perspective, happiness and joy engage the brain in distinct but overlapping ways. Both emotions activate reward systems in the brain, but their triggers, durations, and neural pathways differ significantly. Happiness is often a fleeting emotional state triggered by external stimuli or achievements, like eating a favorite meal, receiving a compliment, or reaching a goal. The brain's happiness response is typically short-lived, subsiding once the rewarding experience ends or the novelty wears off. Joy is a deeper, more enduring emotional state that often arises from intrinsic sources, such as gratitude, faith, or connection with others. Unlike happiness, it does not rely solely on external circumstances. Joy is more sustainable than happiness because it is less tied to transient external factors and more rooted in internal states like faith, gratitude, and meaningful relationships. Happiness primarily relies on external stimuli and rewards, triggering immediate but temporary dopamine release Joy emerges from internal processes and deeper reflections, engaging serotonin pathways and regions involved in emotional and existential meaning. Happiness is short-term, as the brain’s reward circuitry adapts quickly to pleasurable stimuli (a phenomenon called hedonic adaptation). Joy is longer-lasting, supported by neural circuits linked to emotional regulation, contentment, and resilience. Happiness can be disrupted by stress, as the brain's focus shifts to managing perceived threats. Joy can coexist with stress, as it often stems from a sense of purpose or faith that provides emotional resilience during trials. Happiness happens to us while joy happens within us—fruit of the Spirit, a choice, endures hardships/sufferings. Happiness is a reaction but joy is a practice and a behavior, deliberate and intentional. In the Bible, happiness appears less than 30 times but joy appears hundreds of times. Counting it all joy when we face trials means we: experience God’s strength, feel the power of faith, hang on God’s powerful arm, and witness God’s work. When we “count it all joy” God proves himself faithful to produce steadfastness in our hearts. Scripture References: James 1:2-4, ESV “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And Let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” Esther 8:16, NIV “For the Jews it was a time of happiness and joy, gladness and honor.” Proverbs 23:25, NLT “So give your father and mother joy! May she who gave you birth be happy.” Psalm 92:4, NET “For you, O Lord, have made me happy by your work. I will sing for joy because of what you have done.” Isaiah 52:7, ESV and NASB “How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news, who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness, who publishes salvation, who says to Zion, “Your God reigns.” Psalm 32:1-2 NLT “Oh, what joy for those whose disobedience is forgiven, whose sin is put out of sight! Yes, what joy for those whose record the LORD has cleared of guilt, whose lives are lived in complete honesty! 2 Corinthians 12:10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. Recommended Resources: Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: Mothers of children with special needs experience a wide range of emotions: fear, disappointment, guilt, grief, despair. They have a yearning for relief but often feel isolated and inadequate as they look at the parenting experience of others. As you pour your energy and resources into raising a special needs child, it’s easy to struggle with feelings of isolation, competition, and overwhelm. For the special needs mom who yearns for community and support on what can be a lonely road, my guest, Carrie Holt, wants to remind you that you are not alone, your best IS good enough, and even on the hard days, there are blessings to be had. In honor of Developmental Disabilities Awareness Month, we’re sharing how to find hope and flourish when parenting a special needs child. Quotables from the episode: I have seen how families lose hope, feel strung out, and all alone living this life of being in and out of the hospital. From the time my son was around 20 months of age, I began volunteering at our local children’s hospital and have been passionate about encouraging others ever since. I was joyfully expecting our third child when at a 20 week ultrasound, our doctor told us something was wrong with the baby. We learned he had Myelomeningocele (Spina Bifida) and Hydrocephalus and would require two life-saving surgeries the first day of his life, with one following a few days later. I read a lot about his condition, grieved, and then planned – trying to control everything. It wasn’t until the last few years, that I have truly grieved that, and have been learning to live in the tension of lament. My son ended up being admitted for 64 days, 30 of those in the PICU. He came home with a trach, ventilator, and g-tube with 16 hours a day/7 days a week of home nursing care. He’s been in and out of the hospital repeatedly and to date has had 64 surgeries. The life of parenting a special needs child is continual, so we are all learning to live in the tension of our kids not being healed and how God is with us in all of this. I’m learning that it’s okay to feel disappointed, to lament that to God, and grieve the hard moments of realizing that my son isn’t going to be like other kids. I’m also trying to help him navigate life’s hard questions: “Why did God allow this? Why didn’t he heal me?” His complex emotions, doubts, and anger over being in a wheelchair has been really hard for us. Do not be afraid of grief. Sometimes we feel like it’s going to drown us, but it’s so important to take our messy emotions to God. It’s okay to take our messy emotions to God – even anger, doubt, and fear, but it’s actually essential to our relationship with God and how He meets us there. Emotions aren’t something we get over, they continually come up again and again, but we’ve learned some strategies to deal with them. Gratefulness, getting quiet, and lament are just a few. I think for me personally, it is learning to take this one day at a time, crying out in the pain when it’s there, and then also remembering that God is in control. It’s also just looking for the little gifts of hope and joy that he gives us on a daily basis. Probably the biggest thing has just been his presence and knowing him in a way that I had not known him if I wasn’t in this. As difficult as pain and suffering is, God has showed me his character and his presence and sometimes it's just that perspective shift of Lord show me you, instead of my eyes being on my pain and my suffering, show me how you've prepared me for this, show me your character, show me your glory, show me your comfort. Jesus wants to be present in your pain. Scripture References: Psalm 40:1-3 ESV I waited patiently for the LORD; he inclined to me and heard my cry. He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the LORD. Lamentations 3:21-26, ESV But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. “The LORD is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him.” The LORD is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD. Recommended Resources: The Other Side of Special, Navigating the Messy, Emotional, Joy-Filled Life of a Special Needs Mom by Amy J. Brown, Sara Clime, and Carrie M. Holt Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Carrie Holt: Website / Carrie Instagram / Special Moms Instagram / Carrie Facebook / Podcast & Book For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Carrie M. Holt is the co-host of the Take Heart Special Moms Podcast, an author and speaker whose passion is to encourage women to flourish in the unexpected. Through her testimony of raising and homeschooling four children, including her son, with medical, mental, and physical disabilities, her desire is for women and mothers to experience the hope we have in trials through the steadfast love of Christ. Her recent book, "The Other Side of Special: Navigating the Messy, Emotional, Joy-Filled Life of a Special Needs Mom," was released May 9th through Revell Publishing. She spent twelve years speaking and advocating through volunteer groups such as Family as Faculty and the Family Advisory Council at Nationwide Children's Hospital, a press conference in Washington D.C., several hospital fundraisers, and an event featuring former Ohio Governor John Kasich. She has also been a guest on various radio shows, including KNEO Author's Corner, Family Life Radio, and Moody Radio, and has spoken for women's events in churches, conferences, and smaller homeschool groups. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In celebration of International Women’s Day, a time to honor the achievements and contributions of women across the globe, this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective shines a light on some of the most inspiring women in the Bible. From Leah’s resilience in the face of rejection to Deborah’s fearless leadership, these women modeled faith and hope that transcend time and culture. As we explore their lives, we are reminded that the greatest advocate for equality and empowerment is Jesus, whose grace offers freedom to live courageously and faithfully. Join me with Rev. Jessica Van Roekel as we reflect on these timeless examples of strength and hope, and learn how they inspire us to live with faith and purpose today. Quotables from the episode: The greatest proponent of equality is Jesus, and we can only know the kind of freedom he brings when we receive his saving grace and live for him. He broke barriers between humanity and God, people groups, and genders. It’s when we live apart from him that we experience disparity. We're all equivalent at the foot of the cross and we can really only know the kind of freedom he brings when we receive his saving grace and live for him. You know Jesus broke barriers between humanity and God between people groups and genders and it's when we live apart from him that we really experience disparity. We can trace that through the old and new Testament. In fact, some influential and powerful women throughout the Bible are, you mentioned her Leah, she stayed strong through heartache and rejection. We had Jacobad, the mother of Moses, Abra led Israelites as a judge and prophetess for 40 years. Esther had the courage to say yes to God and in doing so she saved her people. Mary the mother of Jesus shows us how to have the courage to surrender completely. Then we have Ruth and Mary Bethany. These women were in a very male dominated society but God elevated them to positions of leadership. Sarah became my example of faith in the face of fear. She messed up and I messed up. And I think that's what I love so much about her is because she messed up royally. I mean, she created a whole mess with Ishmael and Isaac. She couldn't wait for God to fulfill his promise to her. And yet he did eventually, but she made this big mess. And yet she's still touted as a woman of faith in the Hall of, you know, Hebrews 11, the Hall of Fame chapter. She is our example of not to give into fear. And I think it's because of her faith, even in the midst of making so many mistakes. I would have to say that one of the women in the Bible who has inspired me the most was the woman at the well. You know, she lived a rejected life. She lived her life apart from other people. She had plenty of sins where she had messed up and yet I love that scripture says that Jesus had to go that way. He had to encounter her. And when he talked about her sin, it wasn't in a demeaning way, but it was to let her know, "Oh, I know so much more, and yet I'm still here with you. I'm still going against societal norms to have a conversation with you." And he revealed himself to her as Messiah and gave her hope to the point that she left and went and told people that she had met the Messiah. And so that's such a good example for me because I don't know about you, but when I've messed up, sometimes I don't even wanna go to God and tell Him, but He already knows. He already knows and it's a safe place. Jesus validated her when he said, "Go in peace. Your faith has made you well." In that, he gave her back her identity. He esteemed her. He loved her. And we don't even know her name, Jessica, but her story encourages us today and it encourages me to keep pursuing after Jesus when I've tried everything else. Jesus is the one place I need to go. Oh, yes. She is a wonderful example of we can feel so set aside. Unseen. Unseen. Rejected. And yet God elevated her. He saw her. He called her to go go into the fact that she believed that Jesus was her only hope and she pushed against the crowd. Leadership doesn't always mean, it doesn't always mean leading your family. It doesn't always mean leading in business. I think leadership, if we expand on that concept, means using our gifts to influence. And our gifts might be the gift of hospitality. It might be the gift of mercy. It might be the gift of compassion or encouragement, but when we use our God -given gifts to influence others, that is assuming a leadership role. Since Old Testament times, the idea of setting boundaries between men and women has been challenged. God has always placed women in leadership positions. Influential and powerful women exist throughout the Bible. Some inspiring women of the Bible include: Leah—strong through heartache and rejection Jochebed—mother of Moses Deborah—prophetess and judge of Israel (40Years) who inspired complete obedience to God Esther—courage to be bold, say yes to God and save her people Mary—trust and courage to surrender completely Miriam—our words matter Rahab—knowing God protects us Ruth—selflessness and seeking God leads to our betterment Priscilla—help each other mature in our faith Mary Magdalene—the power of a submitted heart Rachel—the power of patience to wait on God Hannah—God prizes faithfulness Abigail—equipped for wisdom Martha—God equips us to use our practical gifts Hagar—God gives us strength to move forward Anna—keep watch for God’s works Lydia—grow in love for God for others Rebekah—know that God’s plans are always good Many of the inspiring women of the Bible encourage us to know our strengths, use our influence as an invitation to know God, lead by example and lead with love. Our hardships don’t preempt us from living a life of faith and hope. They propel us toward faith and hope when we keep our eyes fixed on Jesus. One of the key commonalities between all of these women is that they did face hardships. So my hope filled perspective is this, that hardships don't preempt us from living a life of faith and hope. They actually propel us toward faith and hope when we keep our eyes fixed on Jesus. That's so important because I think in our culture, we look at hardships and Lord. We're doing everything that we can that's right. Jesus told us we would experience hardships. - He did. Read though for the accounts of the women in scripture and how they modeled getting through those hardships and the lessons that they teach us. And there have been so many as we listed off some of the other women that we didn't have time to really talk about in depth today. We would encourage you pick one or two of those women's accounts and go study them for yourself. Scripture References: Matthew 6:33 “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” 1 Peter 3:6 “For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do.” Recommended Resources: Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: When alcohol addiction enters a family, it can bring heartache, uncertainty, and difficult choices. Sonja Meyrer shares her deeply personal journey of navigating her husband’s battle with alcohol addiction and his tragic loss. Through grief and unanswered questions, she discovered God’s presence in the midst of pain. Now, she helps others find healing, set healthy boundaries, and move forward with faith. If you're struggling with the effects of addiction in your family, this conversation offers encouragement and practical wisdom. Quotables from the episode: The word redemption really resonates because I believe that as Christ followers, nothing is wasted. Jesus had to have his scars in his resurrected body to prove that he was who he said he was and that he had done what he said he would do. So his scars are beautiful, and so are ours. Frequently our greatest areas of ministry come out of our greatest pain and woundedness. About twenty years into our marriage, the disease of alcohol addiction showed up. It wasn’t something I was familiar with—it was not present in my family growing up. Anyone who has suffered the effects of addiction can tell you that there is a day when “something is different.” On that day when something changed, I realized I was really in over my head. Especially as a spouse, who was raising children, I had to ask how do I fit into this. We say “in sickness and in health,” and that is true, but how do I protect myself and my kids? I didn’t start my career thinking, “I’d love to be an addiction specialist!” I don’t think anyone starts off that way. But it is my greatest honor and joy to sit with other people as a coach to find their own God-given hope and peace regardless of the choices of other people. Now I get to share out of my own experience how I navigated that time. When we will change the verbiage from “I have to” to “I get to,” first, that puts more control back into our hands in otherwise powerless situations, and, it gives us a more hope-filled perspective. So often, the ministries that many of us have are not ministries we would have asked for or signed up for but that is the goodness of God to bring you to the place where you can say “it’s my honor and privilege to walk with others.” The difference between those who stay angry and disgruntled versus those who say, “okay God, what do you have for me?” is operating from a place of surrender. Along the way, I had to learn to let go. I learned to say, “Even if, God, this all falls apart, you are still good, and I will still find my way forward.” I no longer hold onto what I think the future should look like. Instead, I say, “wherever you lead me is a good place to go.” In the letting go, it gives God the freedom to work his will, his way, and his timing. Unfortunately, my spouse fell into a deep depression and after a few years made the regretful decision to end his life. As a Christian spouse, I had to navigate the questions, “God why didn’t you heal him?” and at the same time, wondering, did I do everything well? Did I do it all right? The process of trying to learn how to honor the dignity of his suffering and yet still finding joy and happiness in my own life, was a process that takes some time. But I do believe that God can give us true joy from knowing He’s on our side if we’re willing to let go of our expectations of what we think life is supposed to be like. Some of us fall under faulty theology and think that if we’re doing the right things, we won’t experience suffering but that isn’t at all what Jesus told us. He said “in this world, you will experience trouble/suffering/pain, BUT take heart, I have overcome the world.” He also said, “If you’re going to follow me, you are going to suffer.” When I can get to the place that I can say, “This is for you to handle, God” it goes so much better. We say in the recovery community that “expectation is the root of all suffering.” Where we can live a life where are hands are truly open and we can say to God, “This is what I want…however, make me an instrument” and not be disgruntled and not get discouraged, it goes so much better. I’m grateful for Jesus’s example. In the garden before His death, Jesus cried out to God, “I don’t want to do this…if there is any other way please show me” but then he came back to the point of submission and surrender where he said “but I want your will more than I want mine.” The struggle of watching someone not be able to conquer the disease that they have is very sad. Jesus did a really good job of setting boundaries both when he said “yes,” and when he said “no.” This tragedy created an enormous bond between me and my children. They want to stay connected. They care for each other in a way that they hadn’t before. Another blessing that came out of this was my willingness to ask for help, my willingness to show my vulnerability, and it has allowed those around us the opportunity to love on us and love our family. So, it has helped me to not be so proud. You are not alone. There is hope. We don’t have to do this alone. Being around like-minded people who are also on the same path can lend so much relief. Scripture References: John 16:33 NIV “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world!” Recommended Resources: And Then You Went Missing: A Hope-Filled Guide for Anyone Lost in a Difficult Relationship by Sonja Meyrer Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Sonja Meyrer: Website / Facebook / Instagram / Podcast For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Sonja Meyrer is a certified professional coach who helps people navigate difficult relationships and situations where they feel “stuck.” She offers individual coaching and intensive workshops through her private practice. A former educator and curriculum designer, she is also deeply embedded in the recovery community and works closely with people whose lives have been affected by addiction Her book, “And Then You Went Missing – A Hope-Filled Guide for Anyone Stuck in a Difficult Relationship” launched as an Amazon best-seller in several categories. Sonja resides in St. Louis, loves Jesus, running, her family and anything that involves coffee or chocolate. For more information or to book a workshop or speaking engagement, please visitwww.sonjamcoaching.com. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary: In this episode of Your Hope Filled Perspective, we honor National Caregivers Month by shining a light on the often unseen challenges and rewards of care-giving. Whether you’re a caregiver yourself or know someone who is, this conversation will provide encouragement, practical tips, and faith-based hope to navigate the emotional, physical, and spiritual toll of caregiving. Carole Leathem and I discuss the misconceptions about caregiving, the importance of self-care, and ways communities can better support caregivers. Join us as we explore how faith and community can sustain caregivers through their most challenging moments while also revealing the unexpected blessings caregiving can bring. Quotables from the episode: There are 55 million caregivers in the world. Caregiving often comes with, as you've alluded to, a range of emotions. You called it a roller coaster of emotions, which I think is a beautiful picture of just exactly what's that like. It comes with grief, it comes with guilt. Sometimes it even comes with resentment. How can caregivers process these feelings in a healthy way? Well, for me, it really boils down to what I call asking the right questions. Because early on, I was asking, why in the heck is this happening? What did I do to cause this? I would cry out to God and say, why are you allowing this? I would say all of these why, why, why, why, why questions. And the why questions would get me nowhere. And one day, God, in my quiet time, said to me, “Carol, you're asking the wrong question.” And the question I needed to be doing asking was “okay this is happening, now what?” What I have now done is, I have taken the focus off the why which is the focus on me and what I'm going through and what I'm feeling now I'm not diminishing those emotions but when I am focused on me and my hurt and my pain and my resentment, then I'm not doing anything to get myself off that hamster wheel or that roller coaster. When I ask the right question, which is, I make a statement to God, “okay, this is happening. Now, what?” Then I can take a step back, my eyes are us back on God. My heart is now open to the mistakes that I'm making. And the emotions now can one by one be dealt with. How do I deal with the resentment? Well, when I say to “God, you know, I didn't sign up for this.” God says to me, “Oh girl, yeah, you did. Remember those vows that you took 48 years ago.” And I'm like, yeah, you're right. And all that does is it just kind of puts it back into a perspective, because the perspective of focusing on me is not as healthy as the perspective of focusing on God. God didn't answer Job. When Job said why, God had something else for Job to learn. And when you say now what that offers God the opportunity to teach you either something about yourself, something about your spouse, or something about him. Yeah,… those are hard fought lessons. But I'm convinced that sometimes the only way we learn those lessons is walking through the hard times. I agree. I agree with you 100%. “ I have this space created so that when I walk into this room, it's me. It's my safe place. It's my place where I do my quiet time. It's my place where I work. It's my place where I do my podcasts. It's where I do everything in this room. I had to create a space. And fortunately, I had a room that I could do that with. So I come in here and if life is particularly hard, I have to tell myself 15 minutes is not going to change anything outside these walls, but it can make a big difference in me. We make time for the things that are important. We can always find time if we make it important enough. The real bottom line is, and I deal with a lot of caregivers, we make time for what's important, and that is the honest truth. … we can always find time if we make it important enough. So we have to make it important. And I hope that you're listening because that is such a valuable nugget because we really do make time for what's important. The number of times that I hear people say, oh, I just don't have time. You know, we all have 24 hours in a day, And we are all going to spend every minute of those 24 hours, but we will spend it on what we deem is important. And so if your loved one that you are caring for, if you deem them as important, you need to also deem your own self -care as important. You can still experience joy even in the midst of sorrow. It comes down to perspective and how we’re looking at it. It’s not about me, even though it feels like it’s about me. We have to know our limits. There are some things when we’re dealing with caregiving there’s things I can do, and then there’s things I can’t do. The hardest thing is to understand where those boundaries are. What am I responsible for? What am I not responsible for? Scripture References: Matthew 25:40 “Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” 1 Timothy 5:8 “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” Galatians 6:10 “Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” Recommended Resources: Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1 YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2 Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference Revive & Thrive Summit 2 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1 Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2 Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.) YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Carole Leathem: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple Guest: Carole is a speaker, teacher, author, storyteller, podcaster, and encourager, and she has been speaking at women’s retreats and teaching Bible studies for over thirty years. She is a certified mental health coach, professional life coach, and a spiritual formation coach. Carole is passionate about sharing her story with those God puts in her life and loves spending time with her 7 grandchildren. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Episode Summary:  In this heartwarming episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, we explore how to love God, yourself, and others as I welcome author Rachael Adams. We discuss why she wrote her devotional, Everyday Prayers for Love, and what she learned while writing it. Inspired by a moment in a church pew, Rachael shares how God called her to be His “love offering” and to help others experience His transforming love. In this episode, we explore biblical love, the importance of accepting God's love, and practical ways to love ourselves and others. With insights on prayer and purpose, this conversation invites listeners to discover how to start living out God's love in everyday life. Quotables from the episode: The biggest battle has always been maybe striving for approval and striving for acceptance and for love. I grew up in a divorced home and my earthly father was not around much. And so I think I just always wanted just to be seen and known and loved. And So, I went in search of that. I'm so scared to disappoint anybody. I'm very much a people-pleaser, and so to really start to learn of God's love and experience that from my heavenly father has just really shaped the person I am and changed everything. It changed the trajectory of my life. And now I just want to share that with the world around me. Our early experiences, before we're even really cognitively aware of what's going on or what God has to say about it, really does shape our perspective and how we look at God, at the world, and ourselves. So how we're living our faith maybe is different, but our goal is all the same. What does the Bible teach us about both the nature and the characteristic of love? After I had my son, I really believe that as God was teaching me how to become a mother, he was also teaching me how he was my father. And I believe that as I was holding my son, God was really holding me. He can use us flawed humans to be an expression of his love to others. The greatest act of love was that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us! That's why he came to save us. He knew we weren't perfect and that we needed him. It's so important for us to be filled with God's love first, to have anything to give to others. Scripture talks about the fullness of God. So what are we watching? What are we reading? Who are we surrounding ourselves with? What are the words that are on repeat? Nothing else in the world will satisfy but Christ himself. When we receive God's love, there's a freedom in that, and a security in that. There's the saying that there's nothing that we can do to make God love us any more, and there's nothing that we can do to make God love us any less, and we don't have to work for it. Scripture References: Matthew 22:36-40 “'Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?' Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and without all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” Ephesians 3:17-19 “And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,…grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and…know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” 1 John 4:19 encourages, “I pray this not just for your sake, but also so that you may extend this newfound love to others. Afterall, ‘We love you because he first loved us.” Romans 8:39 “…No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”   Recommended Resources:  Everyday Prayers for Love: Learning to Love God, Others, and Even Yourself by Rachael Adams  A Little Goes a Long Way: 52 Days to a Significant Life by Rachael Adams www.millionprayingmoms.com/the-think-pray-praise-method-of-daily-prayer Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Rachael Adams: Website / Facebook / Instagram / Podcast For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Author of A Little Goes a Long Way and Everyday Prayers for Love, Rachael Adams, hopes to help women realize God's love and purpose for their lives. She and her husband, Bryan, live in Kentucky with their two children, Will and Kate. Her work has been featured on Good Morning America, Crosswalk, Proverbs 31, Today Parenting, and YouVersion. Connect with her by visiting rachaelkadams.com, searching @rachaeladamsauthor on Instagram and Facebook, and tuning in to The Love Offering podcast every Tuesday on your favorite listening platform.    Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  When you marry, your heart overflows with enthusiasm, exhilaration, and optimism. You can't wait to start a new life with this one whose mere presence or voice causes an abundance of feel-good neurotransmitters to your brain. But soon after, differences in temperament, gender, family of origin, and marital expectations collide. You discover that the characteristics and behaviors you once found attractive in your mate, are now sources of irritation and frustration. Conflict erupts, causing reactivity in your temperament to surface more often. Before long, your dialogue degrades with frequent accusations and debates about perspective. The enemy in this fight isn't your spouse. Unmanaged reactivity, those involuntary and unregulated reactive messages you inadvertently send your spouse when you're triggered is the culprit. Today, Dr. Donald Welch joins me to talk about how to recognize reactivity, understand its origin and work together to eliminate it, learning to respond rather than react in our marriages. Quotables from the episode: The enemy is not your spouse. Our temperament is really the way God made us. And so understanding how we are made allows us to become more comfortable and really at peace with who we are and who we are not, because we're created in God's image. And as we embrace our natural temperament, we are then in a better position to also accept and embrace our spouses temperament rather than trying to change them into someone they aren't. Before marriage, there's a tendency to attract to the opposite and after marriage to attack that opposite when it's really one of our best friends in a healthy marriage. So, as we learn more about our temperament, we can focus on enhancing our strengths and minimizing our weaknesses. The way God made us is to be able to protect ourselves. So for example, if I were to touch or you were to touch something hot, your hand or my hand would react before the brain knows it's hot. It's a way to protect ourselves. So what happens with the limbic system is that we can have all sorts of reactions. Like for example, if I squint my eyes, the other person or we're having dialogue, you might involuntarily react to it. Or if somebody screams or you hear something sharp, you might have a reaction to be awakened to see, do I need to take care of something? So we have hundreds of these normal reactions, and I've seen it for 40 years in marriages, in the sense of working with couples, that they will tend to react to each other before they're aware and then they're off to the races, and it's difficult to decrease that. So I define reactivity as involuntary, unconscious thought, uncontrolled relationship, impeding behaviors that originate from the feeling part of our brain known as the limbic system. We can have these involuntary reactions in a marriage that actually set up the marriage for difficulty. So since these originate from the feeling part of the brain rather than the thinking part of the brain, they're largely outside of our conscious awareness, so it can make it insidious to the relationship. So we want awareness. Is it possible that we react to present conflict even based out of past wounds in other relationships? - Oh yes, that's very common. In fact, it's why unfortunately, second marriages move up to about 80 % of potentially divorce because they're bringing in those reactions. In my opinion, those reactions, and there's what I believe support this, is that those reactions are coming into the relationship. And so now that person reminds me of something from the past. That's why those first eight years of life for any child are incredibly important because we are, the way our brains design, we absorb emotion and then that emotion can stay with us and then we can practice it without even knowing and then it's a reaction into adulthood. You suggest that the greater a couple's differences, the more likely their marriage will be to succeed. And that's not what society typically says, so help us understand that a bit. Yes, that's a fascinating concept that really God created the opposite, man and woman. And may I just quickly tie into this idea of wounds and how it may impact your current question because many people believe that their past is the past and it does not affect them now. Others may believe that their past can affect them but they think they have dealt with it and it is now irrelevant. The truth is emotions never forget. There is nothing ambiguous about marriage in the Bible. It is far superior to any other permutation—offering stability for kids, security for spouses, and higher rates of happiness overall. Intimacy only exists in an environment filled with trust and loyalty. Intimacy can be defined as a close relationship that does not operate at the expense of the self, with a self that does not operate at the expense of the other, and in which each person is fully known and fully loved. The freedom to choose to respond rather than react is a gift of being human. Love only exists where choice is present. When choice is eliminated, so is intimacy. The path out of reactivity to a responsive marriage is a continuous journey to discover the fulfilling and deeply satisfying marriage you desire. Fewer adults are getting and staying married. Those who do tend to have unrealistic expectations or poor communication and conflict resolution skills. When one understands and embraces their natural temperament and learns to minimize negative reactivity in the expression of their temperament, their important relationships will flourish and grow. A relationship lacking nurture wipes out any trust one may have in the other person. Unmet expectations are relationship killers. Intimacy only exists in an environment filled with trust and loyalty. We can't simply change the definition of marriage and think you can solve relationship problems. No studies show any form of alternative family as better than what has been traditionally defined for millenia.   Scripture References: Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Ephesians 5 Galatians 5 Romans 4:17 As it is written: "I have made you a father of many nations." He is our father in the sight of God, in whom he believed--the God who gives life to the dead and calls into being things that were not.   Recommended Resources:  The Responsive Marriage: Finding the Path Out of Reactivity by Dr. Donald W. Welch, Ph.D., LMFT Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Dr. Donald Welch, Ph.D., LMFT: Enriching Relationships Website / Welch Therapy Institute Website / Instagram / Facebook   For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Dr. Donald Welch is a licensed marriage and family therapist, professor, and national speaker. He holds three master's degree and a Ph.D. from the University of Kansas. He's an ordained minister, and founder of the Center for Enriching Relationships, a professional counseling center with multiple sites in San Diego, California. He lives in Coronado, California with his wife, and together they have two grown children.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  We've all had moments where we look back on a conflict, shake our heads, and think, why did I handle it that way? With three decades of ministry experience, Donna Jones has had a front-row seat to--and been in the middle of--all kinds of conflict and she understands the regret, guilt, heartache, and hurt conflict can produce. But she also knows it's possible for God to use those chaotic, painful moments and turn them into opportunities for better connection with those around us.  Whether you are dealing with daily disagreements or occasional blowups, our discussion on how to handle conflict will offer you a new paradigm, one where you learn how to honor God when you've been hurt, communicate when you'd rather retaliate, and move toward others when it seems easier to run away. Have you ever looked back on a conflict and wished you'd handled it better? Donna Jones shares wisdom on how to handle conflict with humility, communicating effectively, and honoring God in tough moments. Learn how to turn conflict into an opportunity for growth and connection.   Quotables from the episode: Conflict actually serves as a platform for personal development. During that difficult season, I had to come to terms with something. I would have nodded and given an intellectual ascent to this truth that I'm about to say, but I didn't yet have to really live it. And that is that you cannot change another person. You can only change yourself.” You cannot change another person. You can only change yourself. I need to stop focusing and obsessing over the other people and start really assessing myself and how I'm dealing with this, that's when breakthroughs started to happen. I grew in my relationship with the Lord because I really got to the point where I had to invite God into this and just say, God, this hurts. I invite you into this pain. I had to search the scriptures and go, I can't do anything about them, but I am responsible for handling my side of the to your word. Even in the worst-case scenario, when there's not reconciliation in a conflict, there can be personal growth. Because you surrender and you start to go, okay, Lord, I, this is where I really am putting my faith into practice in the really hard stuff of life. What is the single most important quality necessary for handling conflict in a healthy way? And why is that important? There actually is one single thing that if this piece is missing, you cannot handle conflict in a healthy way. It's that important. And interestingly, Michelle, you brought up Romans 8:28. God causes all things together for the good, for those who love him, for those who are called according to his purpose, but Romans 8:29 is, for whom those he foreknew, he predestined to become conformed to the image of Christ. So how he works things out is he causes us to be more Christ -like. And that one quality that you cannot handle conflict well without is humility. And that's the mark of Jesus. Humility does not make us a doormat for exploitation. It makes us a doorway for conversation. You can still be angry and be humble. You can still speak your mind and voice your thoughts, feelings, and opinions, and be humble, right? You can still have boundaries and be humble, because biblically, humility is strength restrained. So, it comes from a place of strength. It doesn't come from a place of weakness. And see, when I allow myself just to be humiliated, that comes from a place where I don't have a voice. I don't have, you know, it's a place of weakness, not strength. But if I am choosing to be humble, that is me making a choice to restrain myself. "At its root, all conflict is really a power struggle." So, think about that, whether it's your toddler or your teenager or your teammate at work, when there's conflict at its root, it's really a power struggle, right? So, who's gonna get their way? Whose voice gets heard? Whose opinion is validated? Who, you know, it's a power struggle. So, what ends up happening is that when conflict escalates, we're vying for power. You know “you listen to me. No, you listen to me. No, you listen to me. No, no, no, you listen to me, right?” It escalates. This is why that humility is like the key because humility doesn't play the power game. Humility takes the escalation and it deescalates it and that's why it is the superpower for handling conflict. There's a sweet spot in the middle where we're not avoiders or not attackers. We are addressers. And these are the people who actually go, okay, this is conflict. Avoiding it is not going to make it go away. It's still going to be there and it's still going to be eating me up inside. Here's one that most people don't think of, but it's particularly lethal, and that's being dismissive. So when another person approaches us with a concern, when we say things like, “again? like, oh my gosh, why are you making this such a big deal? Like, just get over it. Like, you're such a drama queen.” Or we roll our eyes, even though we're listening and we're nonverbally, that is basically saying, “I don't care about you, I care about me.” If that is not the precursor to destruction of a relationship, I don't know what it is because when we are dismissive of another person's concern, we're basically disregarding them and it's disrespecting them and you cannot have a relationship with disrespect. Don't be dismissive. I would say that's a no -no. And then number two, I would think, is the way we apologize. And sometimes we think, “why do I have to be the first one to apologize?” Worrying about who goes first or, and this is just as destructive: is to apologize, but add the word “but.”  “I'm sorry that I hurt your feelings but you know you…” and then because what that was really saying is the whole fault is yours, I would never have done what I did if you didn't do first what you did and while sometimes that's true that doesn't go far in healing or reconciliation and it certainly doesn't show humility. Also, don't say, “I'm sorry you feel that way.” That is not an apology, because I'm not owning anything I did. Somebody has to go first. Why not me, right? It seems like through this conversation, the word that keeps coming to mind is “honor.” Conflict doesn't usually honor another person. It stirs up pain and accusation which produces resentment and guilt and remorse and all the things. Honor doesn't mean that you agree with them. It doesn't mean that you don't have your own side and your own justification. Isn't that what we all want? Isn't that what drives so much of conflict is we feel like we're dismissed, we're not seen, or not heard and that's what stirs us up to more conflict. We want to be understood so the faster we can say oh we don't have to agree with it but like, "Oh, I understand why you would feel that way." then it makes the other person feel acknowledged and seen, and it takes this escalation that's happening with the power struggle, 'cause the person's saying, "Please understand me, "please understand me, please understand me." And all of a sudden, it just tones it down, right? This does not mean that we don't have a voice and that we don't also say our perspective, or our opinions, but it's the way we do it is with honor, honoring the other person. And that's the difference. Whenever I have to have a hard conversation, I pray this, “Lord, let this be a conversation of three, not two.” That's a game changer. So, I would say that's number one. Just “Lord, let this be a conversation of three, you and me and the other person, not just two. “   Scripture References: Proverbs 15:18 A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel. Romans 8:28-30 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who i have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. Hebrews 12:14 Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.   Recommended Resources:  Healthy Conflict, Peaceful Life: A Biblical Guide for Communicating Thoughts, Feelings, and Opinions with Grace, Truth, and Zero Regrets By Donna Jones Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host and Guest: Connect with Donna Jones: Website / Instagram / Podcast   For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Donna Jones is a national speaker, church planter, pastor's wife, and self-described “Bible-explainer” who has spoken in 26 states and four continents. A graduate of UCLA with a degree in interpersonal communications, she hosts the weekly “That's Just What I Needed” podcast, and is the author of “Healthy Conflict, Peaceful Life: A Biblical Guide for Communicating Thoughts, Feelings, and Opinions with Grace, Truth, and Zero Regrets.” Donna is passionate about equipping others to know, love, and follow God in their real, everyday lives. She wants to know, love, and follow God this way herself. She and her husband, JP Jones, make their home in Southern California.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  In the last episode, Jessica and I discussed managing seasonal affective disorder with faith and hope. We talked about what Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is, how to recognize it, and some practical strategies to cope with it. This week, we're offering additional tips and strategies for coping with SAD. If you're struggling with Seasonal Affective Disorder, these tips will help you find renewed strength and hope through practical, faith-filled strategies grounded in both Scripture and proven clinical insights. Learn how to care for your mind, body, and spirit while trusting God to meet you in your need. Quotables from the episode: Seasonal Affective Disorder is a mental health concern that typically shows up in the colder, darker winter months, linked to seasonal changes. Some common symptoms of seasonal affective disorder include fatigue or exhaustion, feelings of sadness, increased loneliness, discouragement, lack of motivation, decreased interest in previously enjoyable activities, change in appetite, and/or change in sleep patterns. If you've experienced more than a couple of these for more than a few weeks, you might be struggling with Seasonal Affective Disorder When we struggle with depression or other mental health disorders, it can impact our faith walk in our faith journey. We need to address mind, body, and soul, so we cannot leave out the spiritual aspect of our emotional struggles. When you're in the middle of seasonal affective disorder, immerse yourself in Scripture somehow, whether you listen to it read to you through the YouVersion Bible app, or maybe You just camp out in Ephesians and you just reread that book through the month of January and then pick another book in the month of February. Worship music, that ministers to my heart in so many ways, especially when it's so hard to read. When I'm depressed, I find it hard to comprehend what I'm reading, but worship music penetrates all of that and I still feel touched and connected and I can praise God. Rest is so important for one thing because we can have a tendency to push and push and push and push especially during the holidays. We have mentioned this in previous episodes that a lot of us take on a lot of extra duties during the holidays, but nothing ever comes off our plate. So then we get to January and February, we feel depleted. We cannot continue to pour out of an empty cup. So we have to take time to physically rest, mentally rest, and spiritually rest to recharge. God wants us to take some time to rest. And the good news about that is that while we are resting in him, he's doing things in the background. We're not going to do anything important. So, if we could look at these wintering months with expectancy of what God's going to do, maybe they won't have such a downcast experience in our soul. It's also important to stay connected with friends and family. When I have been in the throes of SAD,  as an extrovert, it's tempting to withdraw because it just takes too much energy. But I know that I need to have interaction and even having 50 % of my family introverts, they still need social interaction just because you're an introvert doesn't mean that you're not social. It means how you rejuvenate your energy. But it's so important to keep reaching out to friends, to stay connected to family, and your faith community for support. Call a friend once a week. And if calling is too much, send them a text just saying, "Hey, thinking of you, I have found when I am in the depths, the darkness, I am encouraged, I can encourage myself when I reach out to someone else." And it doesn't have to be something major, it could just be say, "Hey, thinking of you, I saw this funny, funny meme and it made me think of you." That type of a thing. God plants the name of somebody in my heart to reach out to. And it's countless times when I've done that and they've responded that that was just what I needed or I needed to feel seen and you did that today. So if that inkling is there, that's probably the Holy Spirit putting them on your heart. When we're struggling with seasonal effective disorder, it is really easy to read into other people's motives and intentions. And we don't want them to do that to us. Exactly. Exactly. We also want you to stay attached to the vine. And as Jesus talks about, he is the vine, God is the vine keeper, and we are the branches. And when we are apart from the vine, we will bear no fruit. It can be really tempting when we're struggling with any degree of depression to pull back. - Yes. - To not pray. To give up our time in the word. We want to encourage you to immerse yourself. If you're having a hard time remembering truth, ask the Holy Spirit to remind you of truth. That is his job. Jesus said he was going to send the Holy Spirit to remind us of all truth but the Holy Spirit cannot remind us of truth that we have not already taken in. It's our responsibility to be in the Word so that the Holy Spirit can remind us of the Word. Getting counseling or therapy is a very good practical thing to do and it's a sign of strength, not weakness. It's important to get a medical physical to rule out medical contributors to your mood.   Scripture References: John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” Psalm 18 Psalm 118 Psalm 30 Psalm 74 Psalm 77   Recommended Resources:  Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host and Co-Host: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don't need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God's transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God's expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a subtype of depression characterized by recurrent episodes that occur at specific times of the year, most commonly during the fall and winter months. It is officially classified as a type of major depressive disorder with seasonal pattern in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5). If you struggle with seasonal depression during the winter months, know that you aren't alone, and there is help. In this episode, Jessica and I discuss managing seasonal affective disorder: what it is, how to recognize it, and practical strategies to cope with it. Quotables from the episode: Seasonal Affective Disorder is a mental health concern that typically shows up in the colder, darker winter months, linked to seasonal changes. Up to 3% of the general population is prone to Seasonal Affective Disorder. But those who are prone to depression are 10-20 times more likely to experience Seasonal Affective Disorder. Some common symptoms of seasonal affective disorder include fatigue or exhaustion, feelings of sadness, increased loneliness, discouragement, lack of motivation, decreased interest in previously enjoyable activities, change in appetite, and/or change in sleep patterns. If you've experienced more than a couple of these for more than a few weeks, you might be struggling with Seasonal Affective Disorder. There are many contributors to seasonal affective disorder: Biologically, studies have proven that the changes in the amount of sunlight significantly impacts our hormones and our mood. There are psychological contributors to seasonal affective disorder: we have just come off the holidays where there's so much to do that it's difficult to maintain a consistent schedule. Often we skimp on eating nutritionally, we skimp on sleep because we need more time to get everything done. Then come January 2nd, we wonder “what now? What do I have to look forward to now?” Seasonal affective disorder can impact our ability to hear God's voice. There are examples in the Bible that if we were to apply current clinical diagnostic criteria 2000 years ago, there are several who probably would have been diagnosed with depression: Jeremiah, Job, David. The winter months look so barren. Everything appears dead, but it's not. It's a season of wintering. If the land doesn't have winter rest, the soil gets depleted. If we can look at SAD as a time of wintering and hold on to the fact that God does a mighty work even in the winter, it can give us hope and it can build our faith even when we are struggling with SAD.” During the wintering months, God is doing something even our outside environment looks like it's dead. If we focus on the fact that life feels really dark when you struggle with seasonal affective disorder, but God is our light. John 1:5 “The light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it.” But when we're struggling with seasonal affective disorder, it can feel like darkness has overcome us. For many who struggle with seasonal affective disorder, a light therapy lamp can be helpful because it mimics the sunshine we don't get enough of during the winter months. You can sit in front of that light for 10-30 minutes a day while you're reading, while you're doing your quiet time in the morning, or have it next to you in the kitchen where you're fixing a meal. Because seasonal affective disorder can have an impact physiologically on our body, it's important during the winter months that we are still getting time outside, even when it's not sunny. Research has shown that just taking a walk for 10-15 minutes outside significantly elevates mood. When it's too cold to get outside, you can move with the sun through your house. Sit near a sunny window. During the winter months, it's important to make sure you are getting enough vitamin D. During winter months, consider taking up a new hobby that would bring you joy. When I have too much time alone, I find myself in this weird cycle of knowing that I need to do, which is to go be by people, but not having the energy or motivation to go be by people. During the darker winter months, my daughter and I plan Saturday fun days. We made a list of things that we could do each Saturday through January and February so we'd have something to look forward to. They don't have to cost any money. One Saturday it was “Let's stay in our pajamas and watch morning movies.” One Saturday we did painting. You may not feel like you have the energy to exercise, so start small. Set a small goal of just 5 minutes, and over time you will find that that will give you more energy to exercise longer two or three days later. If you are suffering, cling to the Lord. He will guide your steps. He will walk you through this darkness. In part 2, we will be offering more practical strategies to help you cope with seasonal affective disorder. Scripture References: John 1:5 “The light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it.” Isaiah 43:1-3 ““Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.”   Recommended Resources:  Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host and Co-Host: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don't need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God's transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God's expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  Research suggests that girls as young as three years old prioritize beauty, and children in elementary school frequently exhibit body image issues. In this episode of Your Hope Filled Perspective, I chatted with Heather Creekmore of Compared to Who about the pain, wounds, and ultimately, sacred scars, she experienced as a result of body image issues starting in childhood. Together, we explore how God's healing can transform body image wounds into sacred scars, offering hope and freedom. Quotables from the episode: I really believed I had the perfect life, and yet, I have issues. I struggled with the way I looked, but I rationalized that as normal because I believed every woman struggled with that. Even within the church, the message that seemed to be presented was that part of being a good Christian was following whatever culture told you to follow in terms of taking care of your body. Counseling revealed the depth of my identity struggles. I had no idea to feel God's love, and to feel accepted and approved apart from striving for it. Subtly through the years I had built an ideal that I was constantly trying to live up to. As I looked up to pastor's wives, they seemed that ideal. They were thin and trim and beautiful. I believed my greatest gift for our congregation was to be that pastor's wife. I came to realize that my greatest gift to our congregation was to be authentic and vulnerable and let them know I had struggles too. I'm angry at the enemy now, as I look at pictures of me as my younger self, and realize that there was nothing wrong with my body back then but he had me believing there was. What I'm most sad about is that I was so focused on fixing my body that I really didn't pursue the opportunities that the Lord had for me to grow spiritually and things that I could have done for Him that would last. I invested a lot in deeds that will burn up, like what I ate and how much I exercised and how those two numbers went together to create a calorie-deficit. What turned everything around for me was when I had made my own body an idol. There was no weight or body size I could achieve that would bring about satisfaction, peace, and contentment. I had to come to a place or repentance and really turn from that…when I realized the depth of my sin and pride and self-righteousness, I realized I was a broken sinner desperately in need of a savior, just like everyone else. That changed it all for me. The enemy either comes in and says “oh that's not that bad,” or he comes in on the other end and says “who do you think you are? You're worthless!” God healed this wound through allowing me to build an identity on Him. God can only build if I've broken down what I tried to construct. He needed me to come to a clean foundation so I could build my identity on Him, which is stronger, more long lasting, and so much more secure. I have freedom in my body image, but that doesn't mean I never have another thought what I weigh or how I look, but now I have the tools to respond, and I no longer agree with the enemy regarding those thoughts. When I'm tempted to go back to that kind of behavior, I instead ask, “What does God want me to do today? What does He want me to focus on?” He doesn't want me spending my day thinking about my body—that renders me useless for God's kingdom, and then the enemy wins. I do take care of my body, but that is no longer my primary purpose. As I have been able to share the darkest parts of my journey, the harder parts of my journey to share, the more others share that they can relate to those wounds and pain! Through my pain and wounds surrounding body image, God has given me a ministry to other women through my books, podcast, and coaching women to body image freedom, bring sacred scars for my pain. It is an overwhelming blessing to walk with women and lead them into freedom in Christ!   Scripture References: 1 Timothy 4:4 “For every creation of God is good, and nothing that is received with thanksgiving should be rejected, because it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer.” Ephesians 2:10 “For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.”   Recommended Resources:  The 40-Day Body Image Workbook: Hope for Christian Women Who've Tried Everything (A Journey from Insecurity to Positive Body Image and Self-Worth) by Heather Creekmore The Burden of Better: How a Comparison Free Life Leads to Joy, Peace, and Rest by Heather Creekmore Compared to Who: A Proven Path to Improve Your Body Image by Heather Creekmore Aging Gratefully: A 30-Day Devotional for Women by Heather Creekmore  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Heather Creekmore: Website / Facebook / Instagram/ YouTube For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Heather Creekmore writes and speaks hope to thousands of women each week, inspiring them to stop comparing and start living. The host of the popular podcast, Compared to Who?, she has been featured on dozens of other shows and podcasts as well as on Fox News and HuffPost. She was a contestant on the hit Netflix bake fails show Nailed It. Heather and her marine-fighter-pilot turned pastor-husband, Eric, have four children and live in Austin, Texas.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  As a new year approaches, many of us feel pressured to make big changes and set ambitious resolutions. But what if God is calling us to be faithful in the work we're already doing? In this episode, we explore how faithfulness in our current season can bring deeper fulfillment, peace, and a stronger sense of purpose than constantly striving for the next goal.   Quotables from the episode: Today we're going to be talking about faithfulness over resolutions, embracing God's path for you right now. As we enter into this new year, many of us feel pressured to make big changes and set ambitious resolutions. But what if God is calling us to be faithful in the work we're already doing? Think about this, just because the calendar changes doesn't mean that God's ready for us to move on a previous assignment or an area in our heart that he's working on. So in this episode, we're going to explore how faithfulness in our current season can bring deeper fulfillment, peace, and a stronger sense of purpose than constantly striving for the next goal. According to the US News and World Report, over 80% of people failed to keep their New Year's resolutions. Society pushes us to aim higher at the start of each year, in the form of New Year's resolutions, yet faithfulness in our existing roles can be just as impactful. You can go to the grocery store and stand in line and see on every single magazine that's there at the checkout lane about how to set the best New Year's resolutions and what the in vogue resolutions are. But that leaves out the very distinct possibility that maybe God is calling us to be faithful where we are instead of feeling the pressure by resolutions and change. Society may pressure us to “do more,” but God values consistency, dedication, and a heart of gratitude. There are unexpected blessings and growth that come from sticking to what God has already entrusted to us. Actionable steps to focus on faithfulness include: Practicing gratitude for current blessings. Setting intentions to honor God in daily tasks. Asking God for strength and wisdom to serve well where you are. Make a list of current responsibilities and consider how you can serve God more fully in each or let something go for a season. One of the problems with New Year's resolutions is that they often tend to be grand and often unrealistic and unattainable, whereas I want to set people up for success, which takes time, faithfulness, and intentionality. Faithfulness is representative of consistency, but not perfection. Society always pressures us to do more, or be more. Do more or be more. And yet I don't hear that from God in scripture. He values dedication to him and what he's asked us to be obedient to.   Scripture References: Luke 16:10 "Whoever is faithful with little will also be faithful with much." Colossians 3:23 "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord."   Recommended Resources:  Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host and Co-Host: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don't need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God's transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God's expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  For many, the holiday season is synonymous with joy, family, and celebration. But for others, it brings a heavy reminder of loss and sorrow. Grief can take many forms—the loss of a loved one, a relationship that ended, or even a dream that was never realized. Today, we will navigate this journey together and explore how, even in the midst of grief, we can find glimpses of hope. You are not alone in this, and we'll spend time talking about practical strategies, share stories, and dig into Scripture to see what God says about our pain. Quotables from the episode: I want to start by acknowledging your grief. During the Christmas season, there's often a societal expectation to be cheerful and merry, but if you're dealing with loss, that expectation can feel impossible to meet. Maybe it's the first Christmas without a loved one, or perhaps the memories from past years are bittersweet. Your pain is real, and it's valid. Remember that Jesus was familiar with grief. The shortest verse in the Bible, ‘Jesus wept' (John 11:35), shows us that even the Savior of the world mourned with those He loved. He is not indifferent to your sorrow. The Psalms are filled with the raw, honest emotions of those who suffered, reminding us that we can bring our pain to God, and He meets us there. Grief is not linear, and it doesn't follow a predictable timeline. It's normal for grief to feel sharper around the holidays. Instead of suppressing your emotions or feeling like you need to ‘move on,' give yourself the space to grieve. Remember that Jesus invites us to come to Him with our burdens. Rest doesn't mean the absence of grief, but the presence of God in the midst of it. Traditions can be both comforting and painful. If certain traditions feel like too much to handle, give yourself permission to simplify. This might be the year you skip decorating the tree or decide not to host a large gathering. Consider creating a new tradition that honors your loss while bringing some comfort. Perhaps lighting a candle at the dinner table, donating in your loved one's name, or hanging a special ornament in their memory. Grief and joy can coexist. Even in the midst of sorrow, there can be moments of beauty and joy—if we're open to seeing them. This could be as simple as enjoying a favorite Christmas song, taking a walk in nature, or sitting quietly with a warm drink. Grief can feel incredibly isolating, especially during a season that emphasizes togetherness. It's important to remember that you don't have to walk this journey alone. Christmas, at its core, is about the hope of Jesus. It's easy to get caught up in the decorations, presents, and festivities, but the real meaning of Christmas is that Jesus came to be with us—God with us, Immanuel. He came into a broken world to bring light in the darkness. When grief feels overwhelming, return to this truth: that Jesus came to bind up the brokenhearted and bring hope to the hopeless. Scripture References: John 11:35 ‘Jesus wept.' Matthew 11:28 says, “‘Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.'” Zephaniah 3:17 says, ‘The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.' Galatians 6:2 reminds us to ‘Carry each other's burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.' Sometimes, we need others to help carry the weight of our grief.” Isaiah 9:2 says, ‘The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned.' Psalm 34:18 - ‘The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.' Revelation 21:4 - ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.' Matthew 5:4 - ‘Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.'     Recommended Resources:    How Do You Overcome Grief after the Death of a Child? – Episode 273 Find Strength in Sorrow: 15 Essential Tips to Survive Grief Healing from Grief: Tips for Coping with Grief and Loss How To Recover from Grief and Embrace Life – Episode 230 How To Navigate Grief and Loss How To Deal with Grief and Maintain our Hope – Episode 153 How To Find Hope in the Midst of Grief – Episode 70 Grief at Christmas: 10 Ways to Help Help for the Grief-Stricken: 3 Anchors that Held Me in Grief 10 Things Grieving Parents Need and Don't Need Grieving with Hope After the Loss of a Loved One Hope in Widowhood: How to Help a Grieving Widow – Episode 8 How To Help a Grieving Friend Hope for the Grieving Parent: How to Help a Grieving Friend – Episode 3 Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host: For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube   Dr. Michelle Bengtson is an international speaker, a national and international media resource on mental health, and the bestselling, award-winning author of Hope Prevails, the Hope Prevails Bible Study, Today Is Going to Be a Good Day, Breaking Anxiety's Grip, The Hem of His Garment, and Sacred Scars. She is also the host of the award-winning podcast Your Hope-Filled Perspective. A board-certified clinical neuropsychologist in private practice for more than twenty years, Dr. Bengtson blogs regularly and offers a wide variety of resources on her website, DrMichelleB.com.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  The end of the year often brings about a time of reflection over our growth and achievements from the past year, as well as dreaming and planning for the next year. A popular practice at the start of a new year is to choose “a word of the year” to guide our focus, goals, and resolutions for the next year. For some, this is a rewarding and encouraging practice. For others, it leads to guilt and shame when they don't have a word of the year.  In this episode, Dr. Michelle and Rev. Jessica share their experience with the practice, as well as several alternatives to the popular “word of the year” practice so that we can continue in the new year growing in our faith walk without the pressure thinking that there's just one way to do this. Quotables from the episode: When others are following a practice, and God is not confirming it for you, it can lead to you feeling inferior, feeling left out, feeling like a failure, and wondering if you don't hear from God. The problem with many of the quizzes out there is that we can skew the results based on our answers. They are strongly influenced by our personality, by our expectations of ourselves, and by what other people have said to or about us. God's approach with each one of us is not a cookie cutter format. 1.    Reflect on Past Growth When we get to the new year, we can tend to be so focused on what's coming that we lose sight of what has been and what has God done for us in us and through us. And there is a good place to pause and reflect on how you grew and changed, especially over the past year. That can guide where we need to go, where we want more growth. What do we need to continue doing that the Lord has shown us? Reflect on God's Faithfulness Through Journaling Oftentimes God's faithfulness in our lives is tied to a difficult circumstance. And especially if we've had a hard year, we kind of just want to close the chapter on the year and open up the new one. And there is a time and a place. We don't want to dwell. Dwelling in negativity and the frustration part of it isn't healthy, but dwelling in God's faithfulness is absolutely healthy because remembering His faithfulness is going to carry us through future hard things. When we can look back, when we can reflect on the past year to see God's hand at work, even in those unforeseen circumstances. And if we can start celebrating those small victories, those unexpected lessons, when we can build altars of God's faithfulness, that can actually propel us into the new year. Questions to ask yourself at the end of the year: “What were some of the most significant moments of the past year?” “What did I learn about myself through the trials and triumphs of the past year?” “How did I grow in my faith and understanding of God's purpose?” We can get so focused on our accomplishments that we lose sight of the fact that our purpose is to fellowship with God. Our purpose and our call are slightly different things. When we pursue our purpose, our call will follow. Our purpose is to fellowship with God. God will not bless my call when I make my call my idol. 2.    Choose a Guiding Verse or Scripture  Choosing a Bible verse or a passage to meditate on throughout the year, it'll help us keep our focus on God's guidance rather than our personal ambition. 3.    Set up a monthly or quarterly intention. Break up the entire year inter shorter time frames. It might be monthly or it might be seasonal. Use those shorter time frames to focus on areas of growth that God is encouraging you. It could be, for example, to focus on one of the fruit of the spirit at a time, or focus on a theme like prayer one season and gratitude the next, forgiveness another, the armor of God, etc. 4.    Anchor Yourself in Prayerful Reflection If we are anchored in prayerful reflection, God will guide how he wants us to focus going into the new year. Spending time in prayerful reflection gives us clarity, and it gives us wisdom, and it gives us peace. Scripture References: Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Philippians 4:13 "I can do all this through him who gives me strength." Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose.” John 10:10 “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” 2 Timothy 1:7 “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.” Isaiah 43:2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” Hebrews 4:12-16 “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account. Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God's throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 10:35-36 “So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.” Joel 2:25 “I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten— the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and the locust swarm — my great army that I sent among you.” Psalm 139:23-24 “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me and lead me in the way everlasting.”   Recommended Resources:  Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host and Co-Host: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don't need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God's transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God's expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  Continuing in our “Sacred Scar Story Series,” in this episode I chatted with Veronica Sites, who shared about the pain and wounds she endured that culminated in her believing the lies that she would be better off dead. She attempted to eliminate her life, but God had other plans. Now she shares the sacred scar that God is using to educate the church and leaders about how to respond in such a mental health crisis. Quotables from the episode: If you have ever experienced depression or anxiety, or suffered the loss of a friend or loved one to death by suicide, then today is the perfect show for you. My guest today, Veronica Sites, is a first response crisis chaplain. She grew up in a family of first responders. And sadly, she lost a family member to death by suicide. This experience caused a shift in how she responded in such situations. But she also experienced some tragic life experiences which brought her to the point that she began to believe some lies that took her down the path to attempting to end her own life by suicide. When she woke up, she told a friend, “The Lord is going to use this for His glory. You just watch.” And that is what has happened, as she now serves as a first response crisis chaplain, and she tries to educate about suicide prevention. I no longer believe that my previous suicide attempt is my identity. I am first and foremost a child of God. My painful wounds that led to my desperation also made me forgiving and more merciful. Healing my wounds has caused me to have greater compassion and empathy for others who suffer. The enemy is relentless to get us to take his bait. Once I regained consciousness, I became angry that I believed the enemy's lies. Victory is in the vulnerability with the Victor. The most unhealed wounds are usually the invisible ones. God can be trusted with our vulnerability. Our painful wounds can be both destructive and productive. We get to choose what result they will have by how we respond to our hurts. Can we listen to others as if there is something to learn? Scripture References: Psalm 34:18  “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Proverbs 17:17 says “A brother is born for a time of adversity.”  Proverbs 27:17 “Just as iron sharpens iron, friends sharpen the minds of each other”.   Recommended Resources:  Local Suicide Prevention Hotline: dial 988 TALK Suicide Hotline (800) 273-8255 Suicide Text Line: 741-741  https://www.crisistextline.org/textline Hope Line Suicide Prevention Network (800) 784-2433 Elijah App –helps people struggling to reach their support system with one text Hope When You Have Thoughts of Suicide - Episode 22 Hope for Recovery for Suicide Attempt Survivors - Episode 49 Love Me to Life: Suicide Recovery at Church by Veronica Sites Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Veronica Sites: Website / Facebook / Instagram / X / Pinterest / Vimeo / YouTube For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Veronica Sites is a Trauma-Informed Behavioral Health Coach. She serves as peer support and creates safe space for ministering to survivors touched by and that seek recovery beyond the moral injury left by suicide. She challenges the church and her leaders to be equipped and have a plan and protocol every volunteer knows and uses to connect people to next step help.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary: Reverend Jessica Van Roekel joins me as a co-host as we take on the challenge of how to celebrate the holidays with hope, even when life isn't merry. They explore common struggles such as grief, unmet expectations, loneliness, and the pressures of maintaining traditions. Offering both spiritual and practical tips, they share how to hold joy and sorrow simultaneously, lean into God's presence, and embrace meaningful rest during this season. Whether you're personally struggling or know someone who is, this episode provides encouragement and tangible ways to navigate the season with grace and hope. Quotables from the Episode: "We can hold sorrow and joy simultaneously. God gives us grace to feel both and meet us there." — Dr. Michelle Bengtson "Social media is just a shadow of people's lives—you see the shape, but not the details." — Rev. Jessica Van Roekel "Rest isn't running away from life—it's running to life in Him." — Rev. Jessica Van Roekel "Those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed." — Dr. Michelle Bengtson "If you're lonely, invite someone into your loneliness—it creates community and shared comfort." — Rev. Jessica Van Roekel "We can celebrate the holidays even when life isn't merry by holding both joy and sorrow, knowing God meets us right where we are." — Dr. Michelle Bengtson "Grief doesn't follow a timeline—it ebbs and flows, and that's okay." — Dr. Michelle Bengtson "When we abide in Him, even the busiest season can feel more manageable." — Rev. Jessica Van Roekel "We often extend grace to others but forget to offer that same grace to ourselves." — Dr. Michelle Bengtson "Loneliness during the holidays isn't just about being alone; it's about what feels missing." — Rev. Jessica Van Roekel "Doing the minimally acceptable is still celebrating—there's no rule that says it has to be perfect." — Dr. Michelle Bengtson Scriptures References: Psalm 30: "O Lord, my God, I called to you for help, and you healed me. O Lord, you brought me up from the grave." Deuteronomy 31:8: "The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." Romans 12:12: "Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer." Galatians 6:9: "Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Romans 12:15: "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn."   Recommended Resources:  Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host and Co-Host: Connect with Jessica Van Roekel: Website / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Co-Host: Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don't need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God's transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God's expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary: As the holidays approach and we're inundated with messages about thankfulness, you may wonder: does gratitude actually change anything? Is there science behind the old advice to “count your blessings”? In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, I'm diving into the connection between Gratitude and Neuroscience, showing how adopting a heart of gratitude impacts not just our spiritual lives but also our mental and physical health. Scripture reminds us that what God commands aligns beautifully with how He created us. I'll share 25+ unique things to be grateful for and why cultivating thankfulness, even during tough times, is so important. Together, we'll look at how gratitude helps us see hidden blessings and keeps our focus on God's faithfulness. Quotables from the episode: God never wastes our pain; even in difficulty, we can find reasons to be grateful. When we will be continually in a prayerful posture, God will open our eyes, our minds, and our hearts to recognize and then be willing to thank him for all those things that we had previously dismissed or not considered. I want to have a constantly grateful heart. So I'm consistently challenging myself to notice little or unusual things in life, those things that maybe I sometimes take for granted, and offer up thanks for them.  When God tells us to be thankful in all situations, He means it, but I believe that as we pray without ceasing, like that verse in First Thessalonians said, that God is the one who creates a thankful heart in us. Start with the small things. Start with the unusual things. And I'm firmly convinced that the more we cultivate an attitude of gratitude, the more we realize we really do have to be blessed and thank God for. Gratitude shifts our perspective, revealing God's hidden blessings in our everyday lives. Scripture References: 1 Thessalonians 5:17-18 “Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” Proverbs 17:22 “A merry heart does good like medicine.” Psalm 139:16 “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” Romans 12:18 “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”   Recommended Resources:    Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Host: For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube   Dr. Michelle Bengtson is an international speaker, a national and international media resource on mental health, and the bestselling, award-winning author of Hope Prevails, the Hope Prevails Bible Study, Today Is Going to Be a Good Day, Breaking Anxiety's Grip, The Hem of His Garment, and Sacred Scars. She is also the host of the award-winning podcast Your Hope-Filled Perspective. A board-certified clinical neuropsychologist in private practice for more than twenty years, Dr. Bengtson blogs regularly and offers a wide variety of resources on her website, DrMichelleB.com.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  In this episode of the Sacred Scar Story Series on Your Hope-Filled Perspective, I had the opportunity to talk with Becky Beresford about a significant time in her life when things didn't go as she hoped and meticulously planned. She experienced physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual pain. She shares how her first pregnancy was fraught with complications, leading to grief, loss, and deep wounds. Becky discusses how she learned to trust God through her struggles and how He brought healing, leaving her with beautiful sacred scars as a reminder of His faithfulness. Quotables from the episode: Jesus is good and with us in our suffering. If it weren't for my scars, I wouldn't know Jesus like I do. When life turned out the opposite of what we prayed for, I had to heal from the inside out. God uses our seasons of painful darkness to bring comfort to others. Joy and grief can and often are intertwined. Scars remind me what God brought me through. The enemy kept telling me “You're not enough.” The truth is, I'm not enough, but God is enough. Satan tried to define me by what I considered my failures but my God is bigger. God shines through my weakness. God is so faithful and he got me through the hardest time of my life, and now my scars are a reminder of what he has done. Rainbows aren't actually arches, but rather, full circles. Rainbows can only be seen from a higher perspective, and God's promises are still true even when I can't see the whole picture.   Recommended Resources:  She Believed He Could So She Did: Trading Culture's Lies for Christ-Centered Empowerment by Becky Beresford Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Becky Beresford: Website / Empowered Email Tribe / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: BECKY BERESFORD lives in North Carolina and is happily outnumbered by her husband and three wonderful boys. She is an author, speaker and coach with a Master's Certificate in Spiritual Formation and Discipleship from Moody Theological Seminary. Becky loves encouraging God's Daughters to embrace Christ-centered empowerment through the truth found in the gospel, and her first book with Moody Publishers, She Believed HE Could, So She Did, released in March, 2024.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  In this Sacred Scar Story, we hear from Lori Wildenberg who faced the unimaginable pain of nearly losing her daughter to depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts. She shares how her faith and God's presence guided her through this dark journey, ultimately bringing healing to both her daughter and herself. This story of resilience and hope offers encouragement for anyone navigating similar struggles. Quotables from the episode: Wounds have to be uncovered and cleaned out before real healing can take place. With great pain often comes fear, which can paralyze us and keep us from moving forward. Even when God healed my loved one, I had to come to the realization that I, too, had wounds that needed healing. It sounds counterintuitive but helping others helped heal me. God sets us up to have interdependent relationships. God is our helper. Even those parts of our lives that are messy and embarrassing can be used by God to help others. If you suspect your child is suffering from anxiety, depression, or suicidal ideation, ask them if they are thinking of hurting themselves, so you don't have to ask, ‘Why didn't they tell me?'  Scripture References: Hebrews 6:19 (NIV) We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.  John 16:33 (NIV) I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.    Recommended Resources:  Messy Hope: Help Your Child Overcome Anxiety, Depression, or Suicidal Ideation by Lori Wildenberg Messy Journey: How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home by Lori Wildenberg Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Lori Wildenberg: Website / Facebook / FB Community / FB Group / Instagram Lori / Instagram Moms / Podcast For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Helping families create connections that last a lifetime is Lori Wildenberg's passion. Lori, wife to Tom, mom of 4, and Mimi to 1, shares her stories of failures and successes, in her books and talks, to encourage and equip parents. As a licensed parent and family educator, she leads the Moms Together Facebook group and page and co-hosts the Moms Together Podcast. The Wildenberg home is nestled in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. www.loriwildenberg.com    Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Have you ever considered the stories etched into your skin and heart as sacred testimonies? Dr. Michelle Bengtson joins us to explore the concept of "sacred scars," emphasizing how they reflect our healing journey and God's grace. Through personal anecdotes and poignant reflections, we examine how physical and emotional wounds remind us of resilience and divine love. Dr. Bengtson invites listeners to embrace these scars, viewing them not as mere remnants of past pain but as symbols of transformation and strength found through faith.Visit Dr. Michell's website: Sacred ScarsSupport the showBegin Your Heartlifter's Journey: Visit and subscribe to Heartlift Central on Substack. This is our new online coaching center and meeting place for Heartlifters worldwide. Meet me on Instagram: @janellrardon Leave a review and rate the podcast: WRITE A REVIEW Learn more about my books and work: Janell Rardon Make a tax-deductible donation through Heartlift International Learn more about Young Living Therapeutic-Grade Essential Oils and the Aroma Freedom Technique: HEALINGFROMTRAUMA

Episode Summary: Our guest on this episode, Kathy Collard Miller, was raised by a very angry mother. The more Kathy tried to suppress her anger, the more it surfaced. Over time, Kathy found herself expressing her anger toward her husband and her daughter, and in her own words, abusing her daughter. Kathy shares her painful wounds in this episode, as well as the story of redemption and the beautiful sacred scars God has given her. Quotables from the episode: Sometimes when we talk about pain or wounds, that pain comes at the hand of another. Sometimes we have no explanation for why it happens (like a medical diagnosis), and sometimes we participate in choices that end up hurting us in the long run. Frequently our greatest areas of ministry come out of our greatest areas of pain. I have a unique story because not only was I wounded, but I wounded others in turn. As a child, I didn't know I had anger building up inside of me until in third grade I hit my best friend in the nose. To this day, I have no recollection what I was so angry about that would prompt me to be aggressive. As my friend ran away sobbing, I thought to myself, “See what happens when you get angry, Kathy? You'd better never get angry again!” Buried anger doesn't go anywhere except making a volcano. Also in the third grade, I was sexually harmed, although I didn't know that that was what it was called, but I thought it was my fault and that I should have prevented it. So the anger toward myself began to build. My mother was orphaned at the age of ten, resulting in her own anger issues toward me that built up inside of me. I didn't know it would be detrimental toward others later, but I've also found it to be something that God has used in amazing ways. I was never taught how to appropriately deal with my anger. As a little girl who tried to be perfect to prevent me from overreacting in anger, I then thought that God must be disappointed in me and that he was expecting me to be angry. Because of the messages I was taught when I was growing up, I pictured God in heaven with his arms crossed saying, “Kathy, when are you going to be perfect so I can love you?” After I became a Christian at 17, I married my husband, Larry. But all the anger that had built up in me started coming out toward him because his promise of being my perfect, Godly, prince charming didn't come true and left me totally disappointed. I interpreted that as there was something wrong with me. I began to believe I wasn't loved or cared for and that came out in bitterness, anger, criticism, never being happy, or never being thankful for what my husband did do. I began to displace my anger toward my husband on to my two-year-old daughter because when she misbehaved, I interpreted that as “I am a horrible mother.” In the end, I began to physically abuse her. I kept praying for an instantaneous deliverance of my anger and when God didn't do that, I believed God had given up on me, and I almost took my life. But God intervened. We have to feel it to heal it, meaning we have to acknowledge the pain. Then we have to choose to engage in the healing process. When we don't choose the path of healing, other things will happen and there will be consequences of that, until one day it comes out at a less opportune time and a less opportune way. Scripture talks about the importance of getting wise counsel. There is no shame in needing help. Seek out a trusted friend, a mentor, a counselor, a coach, or a pastor and get help.  Do not try to handle your pain alone. When people didn't follow through with what they said they were going to do, I concluded that I was worthless. My healing began when I got the courage to share my sin with the women in my Bible study that I led in my neighborhood. They began to hold me accountable, and they prayed for me. I started taking parenting classes and reading books and I read in the Bible Ephesians 4:26, “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.” I can be angry, but surrender whatever it is that I think I deserve that's causing my anger. God showed me that I was making my husband an idol because I was expecting him to be responsible for my happiness and contentment. That brought me to the place where I could acknowledge God was the only one who could fully meet my needs. And whether or not my husband ever changed, that was up to God. As God began to have me share my story, other women would come up to tell me that they struggled with the same thing but had never told anyone else. My relationship with my daughter and our family is healed. She has always supported my ministry sharing with others how I treated her. She loves God. I thought I had destroyed her, but God has redeemed us and brought about a sacred scar. There is always hope with the Lord. What the enemy intended for evil, God is using for good. There is healing when we share our story in safe places. We need to get wise, safe counsel so that we don't go back into the hiding. Satan loves secrets and he loves to cause us to hide and isolate. My journey of healing came little by little by little. When we have thoughts, we need to stop and ask, “Is this the truth according to scripture?” If it is, we allow it in. But if it is not, we need to reject it, and recite God's truth. If God can deliver a child abuser on the verge of suicide, God can help you! I was more concerned about Jesus's reputation than my own.  Scripture References: Ephesians 4:26 NIV “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.” Genesis 50:20 NIV “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” Revelation 12:11 NIV “They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.” 2 Corinthians 10:5 NIV “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” James 5:16 NIV “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”   Recommended Resources:  Anger Management, Jesus Style by Kathy Collard Miller  No More Anger: Hope for An Out of Control Mom by Kathy Collard Miller Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Kathy Collard Miller: Website / Facebook / Instagram / X   For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Kathy Collard Miller (www.KathyCollardMiller.com) is the author of over 60 books including women's Bible studies, a memoir, Christian living books and Bible commentaries. She is also a popular women's conference speaker who has shared in over 30 US states and 9 foreign countries. She has been married to Larry for 55 years, is the mother of two and grandmother of two and lives in Boise, Idaho.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

In this episode, Dr. Saundra is joined by Dr. Michelle Bengtson to reframe our view of scars to allow them to be catalysts in our growth. Connect with Dr. Bengtson on Facebook and Instagram. Get your copy of Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted. I Choose My Best Life Podcast is one of the  Top 20 Christian Women Podcasts I Choose My Best Life Books: Colorful Connections, Sacred Rest, Come Empty, Set Free to Live Free Connect with Saundra: Twitter: @DrDaltonSmith Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/drdaltonsmith Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrSaundraDaltonSmith

On today's show, Carol welcomes back another dear friend, Dr. Michelle Bengtson! Michelle is a certified  neuropsychologist who lives to break the grip of anxiety and fear, foster regeneration, and renew life in her readers and listeners. From her own personal cancer experience and professional clinical expertise she recognizes in her life and others' both the brokenness that attends life, and the concrete steps we can take as we walk with Christ. Dr. Bengtson's newest book is titled Sacred Scars, and is an exploration of the encouraging truth that past pain and brokenness can serve as preparation for what God wants to do in and through his children if we'll only surrender to and trust in him.Just as Jesus's scars didn't disappear after his resurrection, our scars tell our story and lend credence to our testimony of the love and power of God. If you are ready to turn your past pain into present comfort and future hope, let Dr. Bengtson be your compassionate guide.Connect with Michelle and order Sacred Scars at https://drmichellebengtson.com/ Connect with Carol at https://www.carolmcleodministries.com/ or email her at carolmcleod@carolmcleodministries.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/carolmcleodministriesInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolmcleodministriesYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQE6z9U5VR9tjoJB1NAsgMw

Episode Summary:  Have you ever prayed fervently for something for years, or even decades and began to doubt that God would answer your prayers? My guest on today's episode is Bunny Yekzaman who prayed for over 20 years for her Muslim husband to receive God's gift of salvation. Her journey took a powerful turn when she learned to pray in faith and release control to God's timing. Thought it was a painful time in her life, Bunny shares how God redeemed that pain, bringing beautiful sacred scars in place of her painful wounds.    Quotables from the episode: Sometimes we create wounds ourselves and we don't even realize we are doing it. I was raised to not marry an unbeliever. I was told “don't do this” or “don't do that” but there was really no education as to why. But there are important principles in God's word about why we shouldn't be unequally yoked—it's an element of protection that God puts around us if we will just obey his word. Sometimes we don't really mean to disobey Him, but sometimes we just really don't understand that that protection is coming from God. I knew not to marry an unbeliever, but I didn't understand why. Was that really from God, or was that just another rule to follow? When I got into college, I met a man who was totally on the other side of the world from me. He was raised Muslim, raised in Iran, came here to go to school, denounced his beliefs, accepted the communist teaching and was teaching that in an undergraduate class at the college I attended. When they told me to stay away from him, it just made me want to run toward him. When I realized that I was a believer and he was an unbeliever, I began to think that maybe this was supposed to be my goal: to change this man so I spent 8 years trying to change him. We knew each other for eight months and then got married. Nobody said it would work, and it almost didn't because I did step into a relationship unequally yoked. We think love is going to cure everything, but there is not true love where there isn't a relationship with Christ. So maybe I had this deep abiding love for Jesus and for my husband, but my husband couldn't understand that because he didn't know the love of Christ. I went for years, trying to prove to him who Christ was and that he needed to know Jesus. I raised our children in the church, and it became a real battle because he began to believe that he was in competition with God. I realized that I had stepped outside of God's will when I married him. I prayed and prayed for his salvation, and I learned how to love my husband with the love of Christ and not expect anything in return. He was a great husband and a great father in all other aspects, but it angered him that the children and I were praying for him and that I could have this confidence that when I died, I would go to heaven. In the Muslim faith there was an evidence of works in everything they did, so even though he denounced his faith, he couldn't understand how the gift of eternal life was based on God's grace. It took about 20 years of marriage before I really started seeing change. My children were on a mission trip, and I was at home, on my knees again praying for God to save my husband when I sensed a gentle voice in my spirit saying, “Bunny, don't ask me again.” The Bible talks about being persistent in prayer, so I didn't understand what God meant. There are three reasons why we often continue to plead with God to answer our prayers: 1) impatience, 2) wanting to be in control, and 3) not believing God for his answer. God was showing me that I was asking him for my husband's salvation, but I wasn't asking in faith—I was asking in doubt. We can have confidence when we pray. There is no shred of doubt that when we ask God according to his will, it will be done. But that means we have to know what his will is. If I'm praying for someone's salvation, that's God's will. And if I believe that's God's will, and it is, then I can have a confident assurance that God is going to do what he said he is going to do. I can hold onto that promise and it changes the way I pray! After that, I stopped praying asking God to save my husband, and began praying, “Thank you God for saving my husband.” I'm thanking God for what he said he would do. He wants us to have faith. Faith isn't believing after we see it, it's believing before we see it. When I realized God's word is true, I wasn't trusting in me, I was trusting Him. Ultimately, my husband gave his life to Christ, he surrendered to the ministry, went to seminary, and has been the pastor at the nursing home where I work for three years now. Get out of God's way. Get on your knees and thank God in advance for whatever it is you're praying for, and trust him. Don't pray with an agenda. Praying believing God will answer, but then surrender the how and the when to him. That way he gets the glory, but we get to witness God's goodness and faithfulness. God has never and will never go back on a promise. If you stop getting into God's word, that's when the flesh takes over.  The flesh will start questioning and doubting when you aren't studying God's word. God's word is where you will find the strength, the wisdom, the courage, the faith, and everything you need to push through your painful trial. The enemy will do everything he can to try to doubt God. Hold onto God's promises. The only strength that you have is God's word. The longer a tea bag stays in boiling water, the stronger that tea becomes. Likewise, the more we stay in God's word, the stronger we become, not in our own strength but in His, so that when those trials come, we can stand steadfast on those promises we know. Scripture References: 2 Corinthians 6:14 NIV “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” James 1:6 NIV “But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” 2 Peter 3:9 NIV “The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.” 1 John 5:14-15 NIV “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.  And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.” Joshua 23:14 NIV "Now I am about to go the way of all the earth. You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the LORD your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed.” Philippians 4:19 NIV “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” Genesis 50:20 NIV “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” Philippians 4:6 NIV “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”   Recommended Resources:  Trusting God While Praying for Lost Loved Ones How to Maintain Hope While Waiting for the Salvation of a loved One –Your Hope Filled Perspective, Episode 167 Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Bunny Zekzaman: Website / Facebook / Instagram For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Bunny Yekzaman is a child of the King, a wife of over 40 years, mother of four & grandmother of many grandchildren  She is a disaster relief chaplain, and works as an Enrichment specialist for a nursing home. Her passion is sharing God's love & truth with a faith in His faithfulness to His promises. She lives with hope for her lost family and friends and finds it her calling to pray in faith for them.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  In this episode, author, speaker, and mother, Jodi Howe, shares the painful wounds she has gone through as she has parented a child with gender identity issues. She shares the wisdom that God has granted her in how to remain true to the gospel of Jesus Christ, but still love her daughter.   Quotables from the episode: Often God uses our most painful experiences to minister to others. The ultimate way to glorify the Lord is to turn our pain into power. My testimonies come from experience with anxiety, divorce, and having a transgender child. But He equips, He leads, He walks alongside us, and I'm at the point now where I'm speaking from a healed scar, not a wound. I've gone through years of learning, growing, messing up, and trying to stay close to my faith in Christ and love my daughter through this. The thorn in my flesh came about ten years ago when my daughter told me she doesn't like the skin that she is in and wants to transition into a male. I firmly believe that God does not mistakes and that the gender you are born in is the gender you are to live in. But that doesn't mean that our children and the culture they live in don't feel lost in who they are. In the course of a decade, not much has changed in her decision, but what has changed is how I approach it as a mom who is adamantly and passionately in love with Jesus Christ and is adamantly and passionately in love with my child. The Lord has shown me that I need to be open to what an agape love looks like, not just the love a mother to a child, but His love as spelled out in First Corinthians. God has shown me such incredible growth in this process. Gender identity issues is not being born in the wrong skin. This is actual societal pressure, infused by the internet, put upon lonely hearts and minds that are struggling just to get by at the times when they are the most vulnerable and the affirmations by doctors, therapists, teachers and educators who say if you want to be a duck, and act like a duck, we're going to help you be a duck. Satan, through society, is really putting a stronghold on those vulnerabilities. But the good news is, God is prevailing through it as I knew He would, in my life, in my family's life, and in my child's life. You grow in Christ as fast as you are intentional about growing. I have been intentional from the day I accepted Jesus into my heart that I was going to build a life and a foundation on who He is, on His foundation. I am going to build my life around Him. These children are told that if your parents won't let you be who you want to be, you need to threaten suicide or even attempt it so they will get on your bandwagon of transitional change in your body. 90% of transgender men and women are coming from a traumatic circumstance. It's crucial to thoroughly vet the mental health therapists you go to for therapy. We don't have agree or like the choices of our children. But when God says “love the Lord with all your strength, heart and soul, and love thy neighbor,” when we appreciate how much he loved us to send Jesus to die for our sins, we don't get to love haphazardly—it is a full love of acceptance. What it has shown me is that I can love her alongside the struggles and the choices she has made. It has softened my heart to not feel as much shame, to not feel as much resentment, to not worry what people think of me…when I go to bed at night, I only care what God thinks of me. I believe that our omniscient God is going to be able to weave this into something beautiful. I know the Lord would want me to have a relationship with my child no matter what. I adore my child, and she is going to see how I, her mother who loves the Lord, is going to honor her. So there is going to be a lot of pressure on me to keep my Godly heart in check, and I'm willing to do it for the sake of my child, and most importantly, to glorify the Lord. You can stay a beautiful believer in Jesus Christ, believe that the gospels are real, and you can still love your LBGT family member but you can't do it without God. God will show you. He will equip you, He will provide for you, and He will comfort your heart when it's at the lowest of lows. He will speak to you, and He will give you the words to say that will speak love. We need to go to God and ask Him how to navigate this world. The only hill to die on is the one that Jesus tells me to die on, and so far, He has told me to keep going. Are we loving God's people to life? Jesus keeps the door open, and I think He's asking us to do the same thing. We often can't help what happens to us, but we can take it to the Lord and we can trust that He's weaving it and working it out for good. I'm trying very hard that regardless of what comes before me, before I react I pray; before I speak I pray. I take it to the Lord. Stop leaning on the world. It's going to disappoint you. It's going to hurt you. Take it to the Lord first and ask Him how he wants you to handle the situation with integrity as a friend, as a coworker, as a parent, as a child…we need to do what God tells us to do, but we have to be willing to listen first.  Wisdom from the Lord will never steer us wrong. That doesn't mean it will always be comfortable, but it will not mislead.  God doesn't care as much about our comfort as he cares about our character. When you walk with Christ, His favor is upon you. And when we walk in His favor, that makes us more attractive to those around us. Scripture References: Matthew 13:6 NIV “But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root.” Romans 12:1-2 NIV “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. But do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.   Recommended Resources:  The Air That I Breathe: Hope and Healing from Anxiety (22 Day and Night Devotions) by Jodi Howe Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Jodi Howe: Website For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Jodi Howe is an engaging stage performer, author, and award-winning podcaster known for her heartfelt messages and magnetic energy. She hosts "The Air That I Breathe," podcast and released a book of the same name last year, both inspired by her passion for sharing messages of hope through the gospel of Jesus. Based in Cary, North Carolina, Jodi inspires through her writing, music, and dedication to her family.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  In this episode we continue the “Sacred Scar Story Series.” My guest, Georgia Shaffer, shares the pain of a broken engagement and what she thought that meant for her ministry and service to God. She shares the beautiful sacred scar that her wounds have produced, and how God is using her in the lives of others.   Quotables from the episode: Shame from the actions of another made me feel like there was “something wrong with me!” I felt like a fool, and believed I was unlovable. Because of the pain I went through, I was sure God would never use me again. Healing came when I got involved in a supportive community that helped me to focus on the truth of God's word. I learned I had to take my focus off the pain, and place my full focus on God. Painful trials make us more powerful because we can relate to the suffering of others. When you're in a painful trial that you had no control over, don't isolate, take time to grief, and seek out a supportive community with whom you can process your pain. In my painful circumstances, I learned what God can do. Pain is an opportunity for growth.   Recommended Resources:  A Gift of Mourning Glories: Restoring Your Life After Loss by Georgia Shaffer  Taking Out Your Emotional Trash: Face Your Feelings and Build Healthy Relationships by Georgia Shaffer Avoiding the 12 Relationship Mistakes Women Make by Georgia Shaffer Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Georgia Shaffer: Website / Membership / Facebook / X / Instagram For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Georgia Shaffer, is an author, PA licensed psychologist and a Professional Certified Coach. In 2023, the International Christian Coaching Association chose her as the Christian Coach of the Year. She has written 6 books including A Gift of Mourning Glories: Restoring Your Life after Loss and Taking Out Your Emotional Trash. Georgia offers individual and group coaching online including ReBUILD After Divorce https://georgiashaffer.com/rebuildmembership, a community for Christian women struggling to begin anew after a shattered marriage. www.georgiashaffer.com.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  In this episode, Karen DeArmond Gardner opens up about the deep shame she experienced as a victim of domestic abuse in her thirty-year marriage. She shares the painful journey of living through abuse and the healing after abuse that transformed her life. Karen explains the key factors in her healing process, including how God replaced her pain and shame with sacred scars, giving her a powerful testimony of restoration and hope. Quotables from the episode: Some of our greatest areas of ministry comes out of our greatest areas of pain. I survived a thirty-year abusive marriage. I've been out 19 years, and it's easier for me to talk about now becomes there comes a time when there's been enough healing that it's more about remembering than reliving the experience that happened. I experienced force of control, the threat of violence to control, to manipulate, and to gaslight so I would do what he wanted, how and when he wanted. Often, domestic abuse doesn't involve hitting. I believed as a Christian that God hates divorce, so I thought this was my cross to bear and that I was called to suffer through it for Jesus. I didn't know I could leave. People often asked, “Why did you stay?” Because I didn't know I could leave and I was terrified of my husband who was in law enforcement, and I knew his capabilities.  Instead of asking someone “why did you stay?” The better question is, “Why would he abuse his wife whom he supposedly loves?” Put it back on the one who caused the harm rather than the one who endured the harm. I didn't want this to be my story. The shame was so powerful. I was a good Christian girl, so rather than share the shame of my story, I buried it. It was like putting a Band-Aid on a bullet wound and being unable to stop the bleeding. When I chose to leave, the aftermath was just as hard. Back then we didn't have the resources that we have today. So there was the trauma of an abusive marriage, but then there was the aftermath in the healing. None of us would say “Oh I want to marry an abuser.” Being a Christ follower did not prevent me from experiencing abuse. When I left, shame covered me like a scratchy wool blanket and people could see it. I couldn't look anyone in the eye and I didn't want to be seen. When I realized no one wanted to know my story of pain, I internalized the shame and I put on a mask. You would see the absolute ugliness if I let you in, so I didn't show you my real self. Shame has a look and a sound and how we behave. Shame affects how we talk and behave. Shame comes from the enemy and from the abuser. So, a lot of the shame we carry isn't even ours. With His death, Jesus shamed the enemy with the cross. So, we can put the shame back on the enemy where it belongs. I changed churches over time and started attending a church where I was taught that I could heal from this experience.  For me, it started with reading “Mending the Soul.” About a decade later, I went through a period of grieving over something else and I realized I had never grieved my pain or losses before. That propelled my healing. So I always recommend grieving while you heal. God doesn't have a cookie-cutter way of healing. If you can go to therapy, do that. Nothing gets wasted in your healing journey. In my healing journey, I realized who God really is, and who I really am. God says to call unto Him and He will come to us. Trauma is a liar. It distorts who God is. He is so much kinder, so much more loving, so much more gentle, but yet, God is a lion, He is my protector, He is my body guard. It is encountering God in those dark, painful places that we learn who God really is to us and for us. Frequently, the sacred scar that comes out of these painful wounds is greater intimacy with God, knowing Him deeper, it's understanding the fullness of His character. Anger is part of the healing process. God can handle that anger! Anger is not the primary emotion—it's the secondary. There is something else that is going on. Scripture References: Romans 2:4 “It is the kindness of God that leads to repentance.” Isaiah 45:3 NIV “I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.” Ezekiel 34   Recommended Resources:  Hope for Healing from Domestic Abuse: Reaching for God's Promise of Real Freedom by Karen DeArmond Gardner  When Healing After Domestic Abuse, God Will Meet You – Your Hope Filled Perspective, episode 120 Leaving an Abusive Marriage Isn't the End by Karen DeArmond Gardner Hope for Healing from Domestic Abuse – Your Hope Filled Perspective episode 119 When to Leave an Abusive Relationship by Karen DeArmond Gardner Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Karen DeArmond Gardner: Website / Facebook / Instagram / X For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Karen DeArmond Gardner is a certified advocate who provides emotional support for domestic abuse survivors. Walking with survivors in the aftermath of domestic, as they discover how to reframe what is normal and real as they process their pain and trauma. Learning how to move from hopelessness to hope and from death to life through mentoring and inner healing.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  In this Sacred Scar Story, I chat with Carole Leathem, a mental health caregiver who founded a caregiving ministry after becoming the primary caregiver for her pastor husband who struggled with mental health issues, and later, her mother. Carole shares how she coped with the emotional impact of her caregiving journey, including the pain of being disqualified from ministry due to her husband's struggles. She opens up about the deep wounds she experienced and how God turned things around for good, transforming her scars into a powerful source of healing and service to others.   Quotables from the episode: So often our greatest areas of ministry come out of our greatest areas of pain and woundedness. I experienced physical, emotional, mental, relational, and spiritual wounds and it completely changed the trajectory of my life and ministry. My husband of many years was a pastor and woke up one morning experiencing anxiety that continued to worsen. By the end of 2016, the anxiety led to full blown depression. It kind of blindsided me because I had never been around anyone with such devastating anxiety or depression. Eventuallly, he became suicidal and had to go into a psychiatric hospital for seven days which created chaos and messiness in our lives. When the dust settled, he could no longer pastor or do his job resulting in his early retirement. I had a fulltime speaking ministry, but all of a sudden my speaking engagements began to cancel because somehow, his mental instability disqualified me in their eyes. Scars remind us that there was a pain, that there was an injury. I went from having an incredible life, to standing in a parking lot one night asking God, “God, what has happened to my life?” But I found God walking through it with me one step at a time. I found that he had put things into place for this season 20-25 years ago that I was going to need that day. The wound was so deep, and we didn't know who was safe to talk about our pain. I've been through a lot, but this was probably the most pivotal turning point in my life. In my book, Sacred Scars, I (Dr. B) shared that I was raised by a mother who was depressed my entire childhood and then I experienced severe clinical depression. I feared that that would disqualify me from my work in mental health. But what I found was that experience made me much more compassionate and empathic toward others, and my patients and readers could tell that I truly understand them because I had experienced it myself. I had already found freedom from having been raised by an alcoholic father and a narcissistic, abusive mother, but when you go through something so catastrophic, like I did with my husband, it triggered all the thoughts about not being good enough, who do you think you are, and now what do I do? Immediately I got into Scripture because I knew that if I didn't stay grounded in God's Word, those lies were going to destroy me. I needed to be strong not only for myself but for my husband, and I needed to go where the absolute truth was. I said to God, “Even if I never stand on a platform or teach the Bible again, I know it'll be okay because you are in this with me.” When a crisis hits, we have to already know what we believe because that is what we will fall back on. We can't wait until a crisis hits to determine what we believe because in a crisis we are more likely to react than to respond, if we don't have a firm foundation based on truth.   Scripture References: James 1:2-4 MSG “Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.”   Recommended Resources:   Self-Care for Caregivers – Your Hope Filled Perspective episode 168 10 Scriptures of Encouragement for Caregivers Hope and Help for How to Avoid Caregiver Burnout – Your Hope Filled Perspective episode 12 Caring for the Caregiver Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Carole Leathem: Website / Podcast / Book / Instagram / Facebook For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Carole Leathem is a speaker, teacher, author, storyteller, podcaster, and encourager, and she has been speaking at women's retreats and teaching Bible studies for over thirty years. She is a certified mental health coach, professional life coach, and a spiritual formation coach. Carole is passionate about sharing her story with those God puts in her life and loves spending time with her 7 grandchildren.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  This week's guest on the Sacred Scar Story Series, Barb Roose, faced prejudice from early childhood. This led to her believing she was never enough and compensating by trying to “outperform her race.” She shares her story, and how she found healing, and God's peace.  Quotables from the episode: I love the message that God can use all things because when we're in deep pain, that's the opposite of what we're thinking: that the pain becomes a limiting factor in our lives. In my particular story, this idea of wounding actually happened even before I recognized it. In kindergarten, there was just something about me that my kindergarten teacher didn't like. I came to find out later on that it was because of my skin color. When I was five years old, I received a very strong, palpable message: before that it was my parents and family and I was surrounded by love, belonging, and acceptance, but when I went out into the world, my kindergarten teacher sent me the message that I was not enough; there was something intrinsically wrong with me. When I was in high school, I found my kindergarten report card and my teacher had written that “Barbara will struggle in life and won't amount to much.” At an early age, even before I knew that there was a wound, something opened up inside of me and I spent a lot of my spiritual journey working to out-perform my race. As life would go on, I lived in a community that was more than 99% Caucasian, which was not me, so there were many points when that wound would reopen. I recognized the blessing that God gave me parents and family who would show me unconditional love and I recognize that not everyone gets that. But in my case, that helped the wound not grow exponentially. I've seen many people from diverse communities where that wound keeps opening and deepening. Throughout my entire life I tried to heal that wound with performance. Couple that with a faith-based community that was a little more legalistic and add that to competition in a very competitive school environment and that set me up later in life to have other family difficulties like addiction issues and my divorce, where some of the themes of my past wounds would be repeated and meant that God needed to do a lot of healing. Often, some of the wounds that are the most painful start in childhood before we know who we are in Christ, before we can recognize that there is another voice that whispers to us. Because it happens when we are so young, it becomes entrenched, and we continue to carry those lies into other situations. That's the enemy's M.O. in that he will always go back to where he was effective in our lives before. Fast-forward 40 years later from that 5-year-old girl to 45-year-old me when I was in the midst of a divorce after 26 years of marriage. This was not a place I ever thought I would be. I had been on staff at a church for many years, was an author and a speaker for many years, and I loved Jesus when a significant portion of my life was ending. I went 8 years trying to hold on to a marriage where addiction was running rampant in a spouse who was struggling and who eventually left. All of those performance issues and trying to do the very best that I could in my capacity, on March 11, 2019, I literally crawled up the steps to my third floor apartment after my divorce hearing, and I laid in bed for 3 days. I was so overwhelmed with the trauma of it all that I lost the ability to speak. I could text but not speak. Just because we love Jesus and are walking with Jesus does not mean that life does not get overwhelming. In that season of life, I had to reform a part of my identity in Christ. I knew that I was deeply loved by God. I knew that he was with me and for me. But I had lost a significant part of myself in the brokenness of my family and who I thought I was and who I would be from that moment on. A friend encouraged me to pray and ask God for a new name. I had been Mrs. Roose for 26 years. As I prayed over the next month, God gave me a phrase that constituted my new name: “You are God's beautiful, loveable, capable daughter. You are confident in Christ, and you are worthy of God's best.” If you follow after Christ, you are going to participate in suffering. You are going to go through stuff, but God can and will redeem it. Healing began years before in a healing journey. The evidence of healing took a while, but I had the opportunity to work with great Christian counselors on things in me that I knew weren't where God wanted me to be. So that healing journey began about 7-8 years before the divorce. During the pandemic, I was divorced and an empty nester all within six months. I had lost my father, my father-in-law and my husband all within one year. But one spring day, I sensed God whisper “I have restored what the locusts have eaten.” And in that, I realized I had the perfect peace of God. As a Christian woman, the “scarlet D” for divorce is something that is like a 1,000-pound heavy weight. That weight of shame was so deep and as I began talking with other friends who had been through similar experiences, there was a compassion that I began to develop. For me to let go of the shame meant clinging to the promises of God's truth because Satan was using that “scarlet D” as a sword. I began doing something called “God Morning; God Night.” I began doing this during my alcoholism years. Alcohol walked in my door at 7am every morning so when I first woke up, I had to deal with the effects of alcoholism first thing in the morning. So, I began repeating 5 promises of God to myself before I put my feet on the floor. Later on, I would tape that note card on my bathroom mirror so I would steal myself to God's promises. That was a slow march, every day believing the promises of God and repeating them until the whisper of shame faded away. The ABC's of the wilderness season: A: Always believe God loves you B: Believe God's promises for you C: Challenge yourself to surrender and let go of what you can't control Surrender really is the path of peace. God's got it, and it may not look like it, but the reality is that he is able to do immeasurably more than we could ask or imagine. When we let go and release our circumstances to God, we need and receive his peace and his power to get through it. Scripture References: Joel 2:25 NIV “I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten—the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and the locust swarm—my great army that I sent among you.”   Recommended Resources:  Stronger Than Stress: 10 Spiritual Practices to Win the Battle of Overwhelm by Barb Roose  Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Barb Roose: Website / Book / Facebook / X / Instagram For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Barb Roose is a popular speaker and author who is passionate about teaching women to live beautifully strong and courageous in spite of their fears so that they can experience God's great adventure of faith and purpose for their lives. Since 2005, Barb has been speaking to audiences in the US and abroad, including national platforms such as the Aspire Women's Events, She Speaks Conference, and the UMC Leadership Institute. She's a Bible teacher who loves following God more than anything else in life. Barb makes God's Word come alive through powerful teaching, personal stories and practical next steps. Audiences love her authenticity and humor. Barb is a real woman who has experienced depression and anxiety, parenting challenges, family addiction trauma and long seasons of walking by faith in unanswered prayer. Rather than teaching audiences to follow God to get what they want, Barb inspires audiences to discover that God is all they need!     Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Join Dr. Michelle Bengtson in a heartfelt conversation on Becoming Bridge Builder with Keith Haney, where they explore the transformative journey of turning scars into sacred scars through the healing power of God. Discover how personal stories of overcoming scars can bring beauty and purpose to life. Embrace the significance of trusting God with your pain and witness how wounds can become sources of inspiration.In this uplifting discussion, Dr. Bengtson shares profound insights into themes of healing, redemption, and the profound impact of God's love. This episode is a testament to the power of faith and the beauty that can emerge from our deepest wounds.

Episode Summary:  Many of us unknowingly invest our time and energy seeking validation and acceptance from others, often at the cost of our own well-being. On this episode, I sat down with Aliene Thompson, founder of Treasured Ministries International, to discuss her journey through painful emotional wounds that led to co-dependency. She shares how God revealed these patterns to her and brought healing, turning her pain into sacred scars. Aliene shares how this transformation allows her to help others find freedom and healing in God's love. Quotables from the episode: We will all go through painful experiences, but when we will give those painful wounds to our heavenly father, he will redeem and restore what was lost and bring beautiful sacred scars for them. I learned at an early age to perform to be perfect in order to receive love. Emotional wounds exist but are harder to see than physical wounds. Ugly words are equated with murder in Scripture, so Jesus validates emotional wounds from the words of others. When I came to the Lord, I learned I don't have to perform in order to receive His love. I consistently found myself in a place of overwhelm, trying to please others. I used to be ashamed to share my weaknesses with others, but I learned it actually helped others. All of my works came tumbling down, and I struggled to understand how these works could be wrong. Codependency is really idolatry of man. Any time we have a lack of God dependency in our lives, God will not allow the idol to succeed. The enemy convinced me to soothe my emotional wounds through performance, people pleasing, and perfectionism, which is me looking to people to gain my worth and value, which led to a co-dependency crash. The enemy is not very creative. He always goes back to where he was successful before. So, if you have struggled with people pleasing, he will try to get you to please more people. An idol is putting something or someone ahead of God, but those idols will never satisfy. God fought for my heart. In his love for me, he would not let my idols win. I felt like I was being punished by God, but now I know it was Him fighting for my heart. He was freeing me. It was a pruning season out of love. What you bow down to, you will be bound to! God ushered me into my wilderness season. In the wilderness is where I learned God-dependency. That is where the healing came, and I learned to put God first. He is now all the validation I need. God was teaching the Israelites God-dependency before entering the Promised Land so that they would always remain dependent on Him. My promised land season was when called me back into ministry and had me teach more and brought healthy great friendships and relationships. I never want to spend one more day without God-dependency. Before Moses died, he looked into the Promised Land. God didn't take him into the Promised Land, but Psalm 90 tells us that God was his home. Home with intimacy with God brought great healing. The deeper we go in our healing, the more quickly we recognize the efforts of the enemy and the more quickly we can run back to God and use the tools He has taught us. The wilderness season gave me the opportunity to return to my family as my top priority ministry. That was a beautiful piece of redemption. Our family is our greatest ministry. God also gave me the opportunity to see my pain wasn't in vain. God gave me lessons that I could then share with other women, so I could comfort them. The enemy will use a half-truth and mix it with lies to us. But God gives us complete truth. God always has a greater plan, that we are often not even aware of. But if you will trust God, he can turn your situation all around and use it for good, as a beautiful sacred scar. Loss is not the end of your story. For every child of God, endings are beginnings. Loss is often the beginning of life.   Recommended Resources:  Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Aliene Thompson: Website / Facebook / Instagram / YouTube For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Aliene Thompson, is the founder of Treasured Ministries and the creator of the Nourish Bible Study Method and the author of the Nourish Bible Study Series. Aliene describes herself as a biblical soul strategist, which means that she helps women transform their lives by changing their approach to Bible study and by educating them on how timeless biblical truths heal soul hurts. She is passionate about helping women uncover how timeless biblical truths heal soul hurts. Aliene is a graduate of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill with a Bachelor of Arts degree in communication studies.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  As a parent, we try to do the best job we can raising our children. While children don't come with a “how-to” manual, God gives us wisdom in His word. Proverbs 22:6 tells us “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” So, what do we do, when our children choose their own path? On this episode, I chatted with Laine Lawson Craft and we discussed her story, her pain, her wounds, and now her sacred scars that came after walking a long journey with three prodigal children. Quotables from the episode: In simple terms, a prodigal child is challenged and gets off track despite being raised under the wisdom of God. I thought I was doing everything God destined me to do. Yet all three of my children succumbed to the enemy and encountered battles with depression, drugs, alcohol, and pornography, and I didn't even know how big the battle was. As a mother who tried to raise my children in the Lord, when they turned from Him, I experienced shame, guilt, and fear. We have a very dark world we're raising our kids in. The phone is the #1 tool our enemy uses against our kids. When we step out for the kingdom of God, we become a target for our children. Our son was high and drunk and in an Uber car when he encountered Jesus. He didn't have to clean up before God began working in his life. Every prayer we pray is captured in heaven. Prayer is your most powerful, essential weapon. God is creating a story that brings Him glory. The only way we have a story is with a Savior who redeems us. God redeems me every day. I know without a doubt it was the Lord who came in, rescued my children, and set them free. God underscored the message of hope that at no-one is too far gone, too messed up, for the hand of God to touch their heart and change their life. And that forever changed me. God loves you right where you are. God loves you and your prodigal. You don't have to clean up for God to come in, and rescue and deliver you. Don't give up “in the meantime” when your prodigal child may be mean while you are waiting for God to change their heart and their ways. You may be disappointed, discouraged, and at times hopeless, but don't give up. God has a great plan for your child, and He is the true parent of your child. He formed them into your womb and has plans for them and we can partner with God and trust Him that He will bring them home! Realize today that you are NOT in war with your defiant child you are in war with the darkness and evil of the world!  Scripture References: Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” 2 chronicles 20:15 ESV ‘Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed at this great horde, for the battle is not yours but God's. Isaiah 62   Recommended Resources:  The Parent's Battle Plan: Warfare Strategies to Win Back Your Prodigal by Laine Lawson Craft 5 Warfare Prayers for Prodigal Children How to Win Back a Prodigal Child, Teen, or Young Adult—Your Hope Filled Perspective Episode 205  Hope for Parents of Prodigal Children –Your Hope Filled Perspective Episode 126 10 Hope Filled Responses When You Love a Prodigal  4 Ways to Pray for Our Prodigal Children How to Treat a Prodigal Child: Rediscover the Jewel Prodigal Child: Hope and Healing When Your Loved One Has Gone Astray Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Laine Lawson Craft: Website / Facebook / X / Instagram / YouTube For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Laine Lawson Craft (www.lainelawsoncraft.com) is an award-winning author, popular media host, and in-demand speaker. The founder and publisher of WHOAwomen magazine (2010-2018), she regularly hosts online challenges and masterclasses as well as Facebook Live events that reach thousands. Her Warfare Parenting podcast encourages parents of adult children. Laine and her husband, Steve, have three children and live in Fort Walton Beach, Florida. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  It's human to have a picture, an expectation, in our mind of how life is going to go. But what do we do when our experience doesn't match our expectations? My guest today, Julie Sunne, shares from her painful wounds of when life and parenthood didn't go as she expected, having gone through five miscarriages and two children born with significant disabilities. But Julie also shares about the faithfulness of God and how she has seen Him redeem her pain and bring beautiful sacred scars from it.   Quotables from the episode: As a young wife, I experienced four miscarriages, and gave birth to four children, two of whom had disabilities: my oldest son was born with a disabled arm, our daughter was born with significant intellectual disabilities, and another son was born with learning disabilities. I expected my pregnancies and parenthood being textbook, and my view of God, since I viewed myself as a “good person,” I expected to have a “good life” so to speak. We often have this naïve expectation that if we do good, God will bless us. It's not that he doesn't bless us, but too often, we are expecting him to bless us in a certain way and it doesn't always look like that. My wounds caused me to turn away from the source of all freedom. I was very angry and had a lot of bitterness which captured me and took me to a very dark place. I didn't have peace, I didn't have joy, and I didn't know the freedom that Christ would give. My anger was largely toward God, although also toward my husband because we were grieving differently. We both needed to grow in our faith but were growing at different rates. I also had some guilt that I couldn't save my baby, and that I had perhaps done something wrong. In my deepest depression, after a miscarriage, I didn't want anything to do with God, and I didn't want to get out of bed, I didn't want people talking to me, and I didn't want to hear from God. God exercises His sovereignty not based on what makes us comfortable but on what will edify and refine us. Looking back, I so clearly see how he used the most devastating things in my life to bring about such beauty and hope. I couldn't be the parent I am now, I couldn't be the caregiver I am now, without the trials I went through. One of the things I had to learn with my daughter was to accept the whole of who she is and not to separate her out from her disabilities. Looking to the future is a scary thing for us with our daughter, but I would be in a panic all the time if I didn't know and had seen his faithfulness through all these years in the struggles and the valleys. God has allowed me to share my story to help others feel less alone in what they are experiencing. Since he has healed me, I've been able to draw strength from what I've gone through. I've been able to accept my daughter, draw strength from my daughter, and love her for who she is, and even learn from her. She has taught me so much like how to love and have compassion and empathy. Those are not that were inherent in me. The Lord used those wounds to make me a more beautiful person on the inside. I wouldn't want to walk through what I walked through again but I can see so much beauty in what he's done through it. He allows me to comfort others and reach out to others to make a difference and point them toward Him. Because He has created beauty on the inside, that is what spills over onto others when we get bumped and pressed. Whatever difficult situation we face, the God of the universe is in charge of it. Whether large issues or seemingly small ones, He knows what's going on, and He has a plan. As the Sovereign, He is allowing the hardship in this season for a reason. We may not understand, but when we accept the mystery of the Divine Supreme Being, believing He has control over all and is never caught off guard, we can choose trust over worry. When something difficult happens in my life, God has to keep reminding me that it took me by surprise, but it didn't take Him by surprise, and He already knows how He's going to get me through it. What flipped the switch for me was taking my attention off my anger and putting it on the needs of my daughter; it gave me purpose and realizing apart from Him, I didn't have the strength for that either. God showed me that I couldn't fix my daughter the way I wanted to, and it made me put my eyes on Him. He created her, He knows her. When that realization came, that I had to surrender my strength to Him, surrender her, and surrender all my expectations to Him, I could begin to see that He was there all along. God is trustworthy. We can trust Him even when we can't understand Him. He's going to be there for you; He loves you. Just take it one minute at a time. He'll meet you in that minute. You'll look back and see that He was faithful and He's not going to leave you. We all have wounds. But in the hands of a sovereign God, we can trust that He really will use it all for good.   Recommended Resources:  Sometimes I Forget: 60 Reminders of Hope for Your Hard Days by Julie Sunne Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Julie Sunne: Website / Facebook / Instagram / X / Pinterest / LinkedIn For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Julie Sunne writes about finding real hope amid life's real struggles. Her own struggles include enduring multiple miscarriages and caregiving for her adult daughter who has significant intellectual disabilities. Julie's writing has been featured in print devotionals for several online sites. Julie and her husband, David, are parents to three grown sons and a daughter and reside with their daughter in rural northeast Iowa. Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Episode Summary:  In this episode, I talked with former runway model, Jennifer Strickland. Jennifer shared how she suffered emotional and spiritual wounds when she allowed others' opinions of her to determine her worth and value. Through her journey, she discovered the importance of finding the true source of her worth -- in Christ. Now, she ministers to other women who need to know this life-changing truth as well. Quotables from the episode: We all have pain and hurt, and if we aren't careful and don't get healing, that is what the enemy uses to hold us back, to think that we are not worthy to be used by God, that we are not worthy of love and acceptance. Sometimes, those things are things that have happened to us. Other times, they are things that we have made a conscious decision to participate in. But I'm here to tell you that your past is not wasted. And that thing that you think is so shameful, embarrassing, or disgraceful is often exactly what God wants to use to encourage others and to help you grow. I was 22 years old when I lived in Milan and was modeling on the runway. A particular man came into my life as a father figure and he saw that I could be a top model. That began a long journey in my life of believing that I was what man said about me. The lens that agents and photographers saw me became the lens through which I saw myself. If they said I was beautiful, I believed it, but if they said that I was ugly or anorexic then I believed that. This particular relationship became toxic for me spiritually. I really believe that the enemy worked through this man to plant some really poisonous lies in my heart. When I didn't make the choices that he wanted me to make, he told me I was disposable, so I allowed man to determine my value. On the spiritual side of things, when I discovered Jesus, it drove me into a deep study of who was man? The word of God says, “do not put your trust in princes, in human beings, who cannot save…but if you put your trust in God it will be like a well-watered garden.” It was the destructive lies that I heard from my interaction with this man that led me to write many of the messages I write now which helps women understand what's going on with them when they allow a good man or a bad man to give them their identity, value, or worth. I carried the lies I believed about man determining my identity even into my marriage even after I became a Christian. So, if my husband said anything, even if he was trying to help me, I became very defensive and fearful based on what he said. I had to heal from those lies. I had to wallpaper my mind with truth. I had to forgive. It was very difficult for me to forgive a couple of particular people in the modeling industry for how they impacted my life, but when I did, I could then filter what other people were saying to me through a lens of wholeness. I had to do that healing work first before I could receive from Godly men, like my husband or father figures in a healthy way. I could receive constructive criticism or correction without believing it had anything to do with my identity. The enemy often plants lies in our childhood before we are mature enough to identify them as lies. The longer and more frequently we hear them, the more they become imbedded. It takes a lot of time and willingness to go deep and ask, “what lies have I believed?” Healing is a process and if we will take those wounds to God, he can take them, heal them, and turn them into beautiful sacred scars. The key to healing is always honesty. For me, healing began with writing my story, speaking my story, and identifying the patterns that were going on. I also believed that I was only as valuable as what I saw in the mirror or what I saw in other girls. That continued into my ministry as social media was throwing other people in my face, whereas when ministry was one on one with me and another girl, I never thought about that or played the comparison game. I had to learn to celebrate other women and continue running in my own lane and do it well. It's a matter of dealing with the memories, assessing the lies and replacing them with the truth of what God says about us. I am his ambassador, I am his daughter, I am the apple of his eye. He never takes his eye off of me. I am loved by him every single day. His grace is sufficient for me. We have to stand on his truth and then walk in it. Confession and repentance is so important. The power of being honest about our sin is unmatched. Once we get honest about our struggle, is the first step, and then replacing it with truth of who we are. Culture today talks about “my truth” but that is just more deception from the enemy because there is only one truth and it is God's truth based on what he has already spelled out and told us in his Word. You are already loved, accepted, and adored by the God of the universe! Scripture says that the heart is deceitful above all else, and we rely on “our truth” that is deception. What I admire about your ministry is that you are taking a very painful wound from your teen and young adult years, and using it to minister to other women, as a beautiful sacred scar because you can say, “I've been through this. I know the lies you're believing. But let me share with you what I've learned on my journey.” God showed me my scars served a redemptive purpose by allowing me to get to the bottom of the well where things were so dark and so destructive for me. I was suicidal, I was using drugs and alcohol. I was starving myself. I hated myself. God allowed me to get to a place of total darkness. At that point, when I began reading God's Word for the first time, and Christians invited me to church, I began to see that the lies the world tells us about beauty, worth, purpose, “my truth” means nothing. It's such a shallow wide ocean that you drown in real quick. But his love is endlessly deep. You can dip your toe into the word of God the rest of your life and stay endlessly refreshed. It's a lifelong walk of saying society is not going to define me, media is not going to define me, but God is going to be the one to define me and fill me up. We need to turn every day to the Lord and say, “I need you to fill me up. I need your wisdom today. I'm not going to find it in me. If something devastating has happened to you, or if you've made poor choices, you are not too far gone for the God of the universe to reach down into that pit and say, “Let me show you a different way and let me not only bring you out of it but redeem it for good and for my glory.” When it seems impossible, remember God is the God of the impossible so let him do the seemingly impossible in your life. The hope filled perspective is that God will shine his light into the depths of your dark sea, but you have to choose to swim after it. God sold everything he had for you, and that was his son, Jesus. Jesus is the light of the world. So, when he wants to shine that light on the beautiful person you are, but you have to be honest and let him wash you with his spirit to be able to reveal who you are really intended to be. When you're in that very painful place, that sand of adversity, let it shape you more into his likeness. Scripture References: Psalms 25:20 NIV “Guard my life and rescue me; do not let me be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.” Psalms 146:3 NIV “Do not put your trust in princes, in human beings, who cannot save.” Jeremiah 17:9 NIV “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure.”   Recommended Resources:  I Am a Woman: Taking Back Our Name by Jennifer Strickland Girl Perfect by Jennifer Strickland More Beautiful Than You Know by Jennifer Strickland Beautiful Lies by Jennifer Strickland 21 Myths (Even Good) Girls Believe About Sex by Jennifer Strickland Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Jennifer Strickland:  Website URMore / Facebook / Instagram / YouTube / X For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Jennifer Strickland is a former international model, TEDx speaker, author, wife, mother of three, and the founder of a non-profit called U R More, that helps women and girls discover their value, identity, and purpose.  Jen has written several books and studies teaching women and girls their true worth, including Girl Perfect, More Beautiful Than You Know, Beautiful Lies, and 21 Myths (Even Good) Girls Believe About Sex. She holds a bachelor's degree in broadcast journalism and a master's degree in writing with an emphasis in biblical studies. In her earlier days, Jen worked for 15 years as a professional model, appearing in Vogue, Glamour, and Cosmopolitan. She was featured in ads for Converse Tennis Shoes, Oil of O'lay, Mercedes Benz, Eddie Bauer, and Jordache; and at the height of her career, she walked the runways of Europe for Giorgio Armani and represented Barbie for the 35th anniversary of the doll. But Jen learned beauty is more than what meets the eye when she discovered what she looked like in God's eyes.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:  My guest today suffered a hemorrhagic stroke at the age of 29, and then subsequently developed epilepsy. I speak with Lori Vober about how God has taken her painful wounds and fashioned them into beautiful sacred scars, teaching her that every trial we face provides us with unique opportunities we might not have otherwise encountered. Quotables from the episode: With the right perspective, attitude, and perseverance, we can stay unstuck and keep moving forward even with our difficulties. Some of our greatest areas of ministry come out of our greatest areas of pain and woundedness. My journey took me through pain physically, mentally, and emotionally but God had me in the palm of his hand because he not only saved my life but he started me on my faith journey long before the stroke so I had a firm foundation to stand on and I learned more and more about how to depend on him. He gives us a choice regarding how we are going to look at our painful wounds, and I'm so grateful that allowed me to go through the fire but also to become closer to him. When we go through trials, we can either lean into God or we can run the other way. But he's not going to chase us. He wants us to willingly come to him. When things are going well, I have a tendency to think, “I've got this, God. I'll let you know when I need help!” But when I go through the trials that seem so dark, that's when I hold onto every nugget that the Lord has given me over my life. Trials offer opportunities. Too often, we begrudge the trials and don't dig in to look for opportunities and don't consider things outside our box. Perseverance ends up yielding the blessing of God's mercy and compassion.  Perseverance has definitely been required. No one clued me in that 21 years down the road I would still have a disability. Grief and loss have also been part of the equation but didn't hit me right away, but rather, has been a journey that I've had to go through over time. But it has helped me to recognize the importance of processing grief and loss in order to move forward. Sometimes we associate grief and loss with the death of a loved one, but grief and loss also occur when we lose our functioning or lose our dreams. God gives us so many mini-miracles, and when God doesn't give you the dream of your heart, we have to be okay with that and thank him for all the other mini-miracles He has provided. If He had granted me the full desires of my heart, I would not have had the blessing of the journey that has led me to where I am today. We need to let God be God and still trust him. I woke up paralyzed on one side. I can walk, but I do so with a limp. I have physical pain. I'm still actively engaged in therapy. But He keeps giving me amazing opportunities. God can handle our anger…He knows about it anyway. When I finally expressed my frustration and anger to God, it was as if He was saying, “now we can deal with it and get somewhere.” Vulnerability is so important, but we can do so honestly in a positive way. I've learned so much through my own need for emotional support, that was never really met, how to support others. When we are vulnerable in our suffering, it gives other people permission to be honest and vulnerable about their situation too. We're all going to go through something painful, embarrassing, shameful, but in the hands of a redemptive God, he can bring about a beautiful sacred scar. We have to give grace to ourselves as well as to our friends and family members who aren't sure how to help because they haven't gone through it themselves and truly don't understand. Every challenge, every trial that we go through is part of His master plan and purpose for us, it's just a matter of us getting out of the way of our plans and saying, “Yes, God, I understand that this doesn't fit into my plan, but it does fit into yours.” We have to be willing to look at how our situation fits into God's master plan. I have a tendency to make my plans and want God to fit in it, but we need to surrender to His perfect plan. God is the only thing that is going to get you through painful situations. Our true hope is in God. The One who created us and the One who is waiting for us at the end of this earthly life is the only One who truly matters. Scripture References: James 5:11 “As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job's perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy.”   Recommended Resources:  Choices: When You Are Faced With a Challenge, What Choice Will You Make? By Lori Vober Sacred Scars: Resting in God's Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson  The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms   Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader's Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day Breaking Anxiety's Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson Breaking Anxiety's Grip Free Study Guide Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety's Grip Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader's Choice Award Trusting God Through Cancer 1 Trusting God Through Cancer 2 Revive & Thrive Women's Conference Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.) Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win   Social Media Links for Guest and Host: Connect with Lori Vober: Website / Facebook / LinkedIn / X For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at: Order Book Breaking Anxiety's Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube Guest: Lori Vober suffered a hemorrhagic stroke at age twenty-nine, and then developed epilepsy from the stroke. She is a survivor, overcomer, connector, and passionate about sharing hope with others. With the right perspective, attitude, and perseverance, we can stay unstuck and keep moving forward. Even with her difficulties, Lori and her husband, Dainis, were able to become adoptive parents to a sibling group of three. Lori's journey and books can be found at www.lorivober.com.   Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson  

Host Laura Reeves is joined by Bo Bengtson, legendary breeder, judge and author of The Whippet: An Authoritative Look at the Breed's Past, Present and Future. Questions for Bo: [caption id="attachment_12997" align="alignleft" width="490"] Bo Bengtson judging the American Whippet Club National Specialty.[/caption] 1) This is your fourth edition of the quintessential book, “The Whippet,” first published in 1985. What made you want to update it again? What will readers find that is new? I guess it's pretty unusual for a dog book that was published that long ago to be reprinted, but it was last published in a much enlarged edition in 2010 and so much has happened in Whippets in the last 15 years! Whippets have become one of the most popular breeds at many shows: Crufts in England has had about 400 for the last few years, only Labs and Goldens have more... I have judged a show with 250 Whippets in Sweden, they have a Sighthound show in Germany that has 235 Whippets as a top figure, and it has become amazingly popular in many countries where you wouldn't necessarily expect it: the big shows in e.g. Poland all have more than 100 exhibits NOW.  The 2024 FCI World Dog Show was held in Croatia last month and there were 171 Whippets entered, which is fairly typical figure for the World Shows. And there are over 6,000 entries from the Czech Republic alone to the Internet's Whippet  Archive, so that's probably the  next big Whippet country!  USA doesn't have the biggest registration figures, but the American Whippet Club holds a National Specialty in April every year that is the largest in the world, sometimes with more than 600 Whippets present and over 1,200 entries.  I made a point of including all countries that have affected the world population in some way. Did you know that there is a world class Whippet breeder in South Korea that often wins in Europe and works with American bloodllines? I read parts of that 1985 book recently … It's not a bad little book for its time and a lot of the content is in later editions also, but it's fairly typical of breed books then, both in scope and size. Not many photos and all black and white, but I'll always remember how proud I was to get into Foyles Bookstore on Charing Cross Road in London and seeing my book on the shelf there! To get back to the new book, I'm so grateful that Denise Flaim convinced me to update it! The book is available both on Amazon and via Denise's RevodanaPublishing.com —they did a beautiful job: the book is much bigger than I expected — I don't know why I didn't expect that because I know that we added a lot of text and about 200 photos of winners from the last 15 years. Anyway, it weighs about 3.25 pounds, covers 530 pages, and when I took an advance copy to the National specialty in Tennessee in April, one reader actually started to cry because it was so beautiful!!  2) Share with our listeners some of the fascinating breed history you have gathered over the years, from its humble beginnings hunting hares, to its popularity as “the poor man's greyhound,” to today. Well, of course the Whippet became popularly known as the favorite dog of the poor mining families in the North of England in the 1800s. There was organized racing with considerable sums to the winners, so of course the dogs were really well taken care of and in fact fed much better than the people. What's really amazing is how many people turned out to watch the races: there are some grainy black and white films still in existence from the late 1800s, and they prove...