Podcast appearances and mentions of amber shaw

What if Mother's Day didn't feel like a celebration but something you had to emotionally prepare for?   In this episode of The Divorce Revolution Podcast, I get real about what it's like to navigate Mother's Day as a divorced mom. Whether you're not with your kids this year, not being celebrated the way you used to be, or just feeling off, this one's for you.    I talk about the identity shifts, the unmet expectations, and the quiet grief that can creep in on a day that's supposed to be joyful. I also share tangible ways to take your power back. From starting new traditions to planning solo time to asking for what you need (instead of waiting to be recognized), this episode is your reminder that you deserve to be celebrated even if you're the one doing the celebrating.   Resources Mentioned: Sign up for ReNewU waitlist to get early access: https://products.ambershaw.com/signature-waitlist Nail Your Niche: https://ambershaw.samcart.com/products/nail-your-niche   What I Discuss: Why Mother's Day can feel complicated after divorce Identity shifts, loneliness, and grieving what used to be When you're not with your kids and it feels heavy Why you're allowed to want acknowledgment (and how to ask for it) Planning something for yourself—even if it's small Reclaiming the day and redefining celebration   Key Takeaways: “You deserve to be celebrated even if you're the one doing the celebrating.” – Amber Shaw   “Mother's Day can be beautiful and complicated at the same time.” – Amber Shaw   “You're allowed to ask for what you need. You don't have to wait to be recognized.” – Amber Shaw   Find more from Amber: Instagram: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@msambershaw

In this episode, we sit down with the incredible Amber Shaw, a powerhouse on a mission to help women create their own financial security and confidence—especially after divorce. Amber's story is one of resilience, reinvention, and taking charge of her future. She shares her journey of starting over at 40, building two six-figure businesses from the ground up, and finding a renewed sense of purpose along the way.Amber opens up about:How starting a business gave her back her confidence, purpose, and power.The challenges and triumphs of rebuilding after divorce.The importance of financial independence for women.Balancing entrepreneurship with motherhood.Why giving others a voice is her greatest fulfillment.Amber's story is raw, inspiring, and packed with wisdom for any woman looking to reclaim her power. Whether you're navigating life post-divorce, thinking about starting a business, or just in need of a confidence boost—this episode is for you.Tune in and get ready to be inspired! Follow AmberFollow on InstagramExplore her website ⭐ Follow us on Instagram: @wholeyschmidt

In this inspiring episode of The Circuit of Success, Brett Gilliland welcomes Amber Shaw, founder of The Wellness Revolution, business mentor for divorced moms, and motivational speaker. Amber shares her journey from a difficult divorce and career burnout to building a thriving coaching business that empowers women worldwide. Her journey began at 40, during a transformative yoga retreat, where she made the decision to pursue a life of purpose and fulfillment. Six months later, Amber launched her coaching business, which quickly became a six-figure venture, enabling her to help countless women embrace change and reignite their inner spark. Amber's story is one of resilience, courage, and self-discovery. She emphasizes that confidence isn't something we're simply born with but something we build over time by showing up for ourselves in small ways every day. Amber's transformation—rooted in self-care and self-belief—serves as a powerful example of the potential within all of us to create a life aligned with our values. As a mom of two, Amber understands the challenges of balancing personal growth with family responsibilities and is passionate about helping other women do the same. Listeners will come away with practical tips on shifting mindsets, building confidence, and embracing the unknown to build a life they truly love. Amber's Wellness Revolution Podcast is now in the top 2% globally, and she remains committed to inspiring women to reclaim their power. Don't miss Amber's insights on breaking through fear, staying motivated, and connecting with your inner resilience, and connect with her through social media to join her community of empowered women. Connect with Amber: TikTok: @msambershaw Instagram: @msambershaw The Wellness Revolution Podcast Website: www.ambershaw.com   Watch the Full Episode Here!  

In this episode, Dennis and Amber discuss the pressures faced by modern women, especially moms. They explore the unrealistic expectations of perfectionism and introduce Amber's “Supermom Assessment,” which helps women identify and overcome limiting beliefs. Amber shares personal insights and practical advice on finding self-worth and achieving a balanced life. Amber Shaw is a board-certified health & … Continue reading Amber Shaw; The Wellness Revolution – Episode 49 →

Have you been struggling with your self-esteem and confidence lately? You're not alone. We all go through that at one point in our lives.    In this solo episode of the Wellness Revolution Podcast, I dive into the three common mistakes that can sabotage your efforts to rebuild your self-worth. I share the importance of avoiding tying your self-worth to external factors, such as your relationship status, weight, or success level. Otherwise, you'll always be chasing an elusive goal, never feeling truly satisfied or confident in yourself.    I discuss this specific scenario along with two other mistakes we often make that could be holding us back from building a strong sense of self. I also share practical tips for overcoming these obstacles so don't miss this episode!  Thank you to our sponsors for making this episode possible: ReNewU Interest List: Join for free here https://products.ambershaw.com/signature-waitlist  Join Crush Life Boot Camp: https://products.ambershaw.com/crushlife    Find more from Amber: Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com  What I Discuss:  01:25 Struggles with Self-Esteem and Confidence 02:22 The importance of focusing on yourself  06:55 Introducing Renew You: A Program for Moms Over 35 09:19 Tying your self-worth to something external 13:37 Internalizing blame and engaging in negative self-talk 18:09 Neglecting self-care    Key Takeaways: Struggling with self-esteem and confidence is common for women in midlife. Building self-worth is crucial for making positive changes in life. Avoid tying self-worth to external factors like weight, relationship status, or success. Internalizing blame is counterproductive and hinders self-esteem. Neglecting self-care can negatively impact self-esteem and overall well-being. Amber Shaw's program, Renew You, offers support for moms over 35 going through divorce.      

Amber Shaw shares her journey from a picture-perfect marriage to divorce, single motherhood, and building a successful coaching business. She discusses the challenges, emotional turmoil, and the pivotal moments that led her to reclaim her power and purpose. Amber's story is a testament to resilience, self-discovery, and the transformational journey from pain to purpose. The conversation covers the topics of passion, purpose, midlife awakening, sharing on social media, self-discovery, self-care, and the role of coaching in personal development. It provides insights into the process of navigating through a midlife transition, taking care of oneself, and finding clarity and purpose. The conversation emphasizes the importance of self-preservation, breaking generational patterns, and the value of silence and self-reflection.Keywordsdivorce, single motherhood, personal development, resilience, purpose, transformation, emotional healing, empowerment, self-discovery, coaching, self-worth, passion, purpose, midlife awakening, self-discovery, self-care, social media, coaching, personal development, self-preservation, generational patterns, silence, self-reflectionTakeawaysAmber's journey from a picture-perfect marriage to divorce, single motherhood, and building a successful coaching business is a testament to resilience and self-discovery.The emotional turmoil, pivotal moments, and the process of reclaiming power and purpose are central themes in Amber's story.Amber's transformation from pain to purpose highlights the journey of emotional healing, empowerment, and the pursuit of self-worth.The challenges and triumphs of Amber's journey serve as an inspiration for women navigating similar life transitions and seeking personal growth and fulfillment. Passion and purpose are essential elements in finding fulfillment and alignment in life.Self-discovery and self-care play a crucial role in navigating through a midlife transition.Sharing on social media can be a powerful way to connect with others and inspire change.Coaching provides a directive action-oriented approach to personal development, complementing the therapeutic process.Self-preservation and breaking generational patterns are important aspects of personal growth and healing.Silence and self-reflection are valuable tools for gaining clarity and making empowered decisions.Chapters00:00 The Journey Begins: From Picture-Perfect Marriage to Divorce and Single Motherhood06:22 Reclaiming Power and Purpose: The Turning Point in Amber's Journey13:42 Emotional Healing and Empowerment: Navigating Grief, Fear, and Acceptance28:14 Navigating Passion and Purpose39:36 The Power of Self-Discovery and Self-Care44:09 Sharing and Inspiring on Social Media47:55 The Role of Coaching in Personal Development51:03 Self-Preservation and Breaking Generational Patterns Connect with Next Level HumanWebsite: www.nextlevelhuman.comsupport@nextlevelhuman.comConnect with Dr. Jade TetaWebsite: www.jadeteta.comInstagram: @jadeteta

Amber Shaw is a Transformation Expert, podcast host And Founder Of "The Wellness Revolution" that helps busy moms transform their mind, body, + beyond (without the diets & overwhelm)Here's where to find more:www.ambershaw.comTikTok, IG and FB - @msambershaw___________________________________________________________Welcome to The Unforget Yourself Show where we use the power of woo and the proof of science to help you identify your blind spots, and get over your own bullshit so that you can do the fucking thing you ACTUALLY want to do!We're Mark and Katie, the founders of Unforget Yourself and the creators of the Unforget Yourself System and on this podcast, we're here to share REAL conversations about what goes on inside the heart and minds of those brave and crazy enough to start their own business. From the accidental entrepreneur to the laser-focused CEO, we find out how they got to where they are today, not by hearing the go-to story of their success, but talking about how we all have our own BS to deal with and it's through facing ourselves that we find a way to do the fucking thing.Along the way, we hope to show you that YOU are the most important asset in your business (and your life - duh!). Being a business owner is tough! With vulnerability and humor, we get to the real story behind their success and show you that you're not alone._____________________Find all our links to all the things like the socials, how to work with us and how to apply to be on the podcast here: https://linktr.ee/unforgetyourself

Do you feel like no matter what you do or how hard you work, you're still not living an aligned, abundant life? Perhaps you need to redefine what health, wealth, success, and purpose mean to you. Today's guest has the key to doing just that. Today, you'll hear from Emma Dunwoody, a Certified Human Behavioral Specialist, Gene Keys Expert, and world-renowned Founder of Transformational Human DesignTM. Put simply, “human design” is our energetic blueprint; a roadmap that can help you be your own guru and redefine what health, wealth, success, and purpose look and feel like for your individual self. From what you eat to how you make your best decisions, human design helps you find the ways you can thrive at your highest potential. It gives you language to what you're feeling inside and the permission to follow what you feel. This new way of living leads you to feeling more in the flow, finding and pursuing your purpose, and so much more. “It's not a dogma, it's an experiment.” – Emma Dunwoody Ready to learn all about it and maybe even start your own human design experiment? Tune in! Key Highlights: How human design helped Emma overcome severe depression, panic disorder, and suicidal thoughts as a new mom. What is human design and how does it work? How your external reality is a reflection of your internal world. The practical side of human design. Emma analyzes my human design chart. How to start experimenting with human design as a woman over 40. Using human design to prevent burnout & optimize your diet and exercise. “This is the future.” – Emma Dunwoody Episode Resources: Save your seat for a FREE Live Event hosted by Amber Shaw on April 16th HERE: https://products.ambershaw.com/ignite-2-day-live-masterclass Listen to TWR 135: Living Purposefully and Authentically Based on Your Human Design with Shayna Cornelius and Dana Stiles Hardwiring Happiness by Rick Hanson PhD The Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford Connect with Emma Dunwoody: Get your FREE human design chart on her website: emmadunwoody.com Listen to The Human Design Podcast Follow on Instagram: @the_human_design_coach Connect with Amber: Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com Free Weight Loss, Health & Fitness Facebook Group for Working Moms

When it comes to transforming your health, you don't have to do everything all at once. In fact, that's often what leads us to failure and frustration. In this episode of The Wellness Revolution, I'm shedding light on the steps you need to take to start improving your life, one area at a time. When you commit to new healthy habits and start feeling good in your body first, you're able to start transforming other areas of your life, too. When you get to this point, what area of life would you tackle first? That choice doesn't always come easily… Whether it's your relationships you want to improve, your career, home environment, spirituality, or finances, allow yourself to dream big and build the courage to take action. Not sure how? I know just what you need. Mark your calendars, ladies! My brand new 6-week transformation accelerator, IGNITE, is opening to the public on April 23rd. Key Highlights: Steps to improving your life, one area at a time. How to decide what area of life to work on first. Helpful tips for strengthening your relationships. How I'm cultivating my relationships with my kids. Episode Resources: Save your seat for a FREE Live Event hosted by Amber Shaw on April 16th HERE: https://products.ambershaw.com/ignite-2-day-live-masterclass Follow the Build Legends app on Instagram: @build.legends About Amber Shaw: Amber is a Mind and Body Transformation Expert, Founder of The Wellness Revolution, motivational speaker, and NBC Health and Wellness Coach. Having built a lifestyle that allowed her to embrace work, children, exercise, and well-balanced eating habits, Amber now works helping and coaching women to achieve the same level of serenity and empowerment through a sustainable way of living. Connect with Amber: Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com Free Weight Loss, Health & Fitness Facebook Group for Working Moms

Welcome to a landmark celebration, our 200th ReLaunch episode, where I take you on a journey through the transformative power of fresh starts and new beginnings. Listen in as we look back on the myriad of past ReLaunch stories from a diverse group of guests who have generously shared their insights and experiences. Each story underscores the potent influence of a well-executed ReLaunch and the ripple effects they have had on our collective pursuit of purpose and possibility.Highlights:05:15 - Dr. Ellen Vora reveals some practical tips to nourish your mental health (Episode 151)12:35 - Bri Seeley explores the concept of becoming your future self (Episode 188)18:12 - Eileen Wilder shares actionable insights for boosting your business's bottom line (Episode 169)22:42 - Beatte Chelette imparts her three key questions that she asks in tough times (Episode 161)28:04 - Mariel Hemingway shares a profound moment of Self Realization, sparking a mission to reassure others that they are already okay (Episode 168)43:56 - Theresa "TGo" Goss discusses breaking free from the constraints of traditional platforms (Episode 155)48:57 - Shannon McKinstrie delves into the business impact of social media and shares tips on effective Instagram funneling platforms, with Instagram (Episode 154)53:39 - Diane Forster introduces her three step intentional living process called Love It (Episode 189)01:00:07 - Amber Shaw dives into mindful planning in order to maintain a balance between healthy habits and the occasional treat indulgence (Episode 149)01:06:03 - Bobby Vargas explores the biggest mistake many women make with makeup and permanent beauty treatments and it is not the products they are using (Episode 171)01:10:55 - Heidi Kristoffer shares the moment she took a pause and decided what she was doing wasn't healthy for her anymore and started doing what she meant to be doing (Episode 174)01:15:28 - Tori Archibald's introduces the superpower that we all need to develop - Self-belief (Episode 180)Join our private Facebook community for BONUS content to ignite your own Relaunch: https://www.facebook.com/groups/232280334811612/Interested in being a guest on the ReLaunch Podcast or booking Hilary as a guest? Email us at hello@therelaunchco.co Find Us on Your Favorite Podcast App - https://the-silver-lined-relaunch.captivate.fm/listenThe ReLaunch Your Magic Retreat is the ultimate event that will guide you in manifesting a heightened level of success even if your entrepreneurial spirit has fizzled out. Register now at: https://www.therelaunchcocourses.com/ReLaunch-Your-Magic

About this episode:  In this episode, I had the pleasure of chatting with Mind & Body Transformation Expert and Founder Of The Wellness Revolution, Amber Shaw, where we talked about all things wellness, business, and mindset! Not only do we dive into the game-changing mindset shifts that Amber took to leave her corporate life and start her coaching business, but this interview is also chock-full of insights and personal experiences that truly define the worth of being part of a supportive mastermind. She also talks about handling the emotional rollercoaster of the holiday season, offering tips on adopting a "progress over perfection" approach and rewriting our food stories.  If you're trying to decide between one-on-one coaching or joining a mastermind, or whether you're ready to join a mastermind group, this episode is for you.  [APPLICATIONS OPEN]

Episode Highlights: privilege, manifestation, setting intention, relationships, entrepreneurship Summary: What's going on everyone!? Kaylor joined mind & body transformation expert, founder of The Wellness Revolution and Motivational Speaker, Amber Shaw on the Wellness Revolution Podcast. In this episode, they dove into: Kaylor's journey with mental health How we can't just write off people's beliefs and experiences because they have a certain amount of privilege An exploration of manifestation and how we are the vessel to attract whatever is meant for us The importance of setting goals and intention and take action to attract what is yours The romanticization of relationships and entrepreneurship  How speaking truth ties into mental wealth  A special thanks to Amber Shaw for having Kaylor on the Wellness Revolution Podcast, this was a great jam session!  If you enjoyed the episode, please be sure to take a screenshot and share it out on Instagram and tag @thekaylorbetts. Also, please make sure to give us a review and a five star rating if you're loving what we are doing! _____________________________ RESOURCES & LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/msambershaw/ Websites | https://ambershaw.com/ Book | The Desire Map: A Guide to Creating Goals with Soul by Danielle LaPorte Podcast | The Wellness Revolution Podcast with Amber Shaw on Spotify | The Wellness Revolution Podcast with Amber Shaw on Apple Podcasts _____________________________ IMPORTANT UPDATES: Check out the Awake & Winning Website | https://awakeandwinning.com/ Join the Awake & Winning Life AW-cademy | http://www.theawlife.com/ Join the Awake & Winning Business AW-cademy | http://www.theawbiz.com Follow Kaylor on Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/thekaylorbetts/ _____________________________

Amber Shaw is a Mind & Body Transformation Expert and the Founder of The Wellness Revolution. She works with women over the age of 40 to empower them to rediscover their confidence and create a sustainable lifestyle. Amber's approach fosters consistency, accountability, and kindness. Women can be quite hard on themselves rather than show self-love. Shifting hormones, the demands of family and career, and a very confusing diet landscape can all be difficult to navigate. This is where Amber Shaw chose to build her career. On today's episode, Amber Shaw talks about helping women heal their relationship with food and themselves while empowering them to transform their lives, love their bodies, and create lasting results. Today on The Lab Report: 3:30 Meet Amber Shaw and hear her inspiring story 13:45 Raising children in a body-shame culture 17:10 Kindness, self-love, and shifting that mentality 21:00 Stop tying weight and metrics to self-esteem 23:40 Fostering consistency, not perfection 28:40 Avoiding diet camps, calories in – calories out, deprivation 33:00 Menopause, peri-menopause – old tricks no longer work 37:00 Work with Amber Shaw – sorry guys, women only 39:30 The Fireball Additional Resources: AmberShaw.com The Wellness Revolution Podcast Subscribe, Rate, & Review The Lab Report Thanks for tuning in to this week's episode of The Lab Report, presented by Genova Diagnostics, with your hosts Michael Chapman and Patti Devers. If you enjoyed this episode, please hit the subscribe button and give us a rating or leave a review. Don't forget to visit our website, like us on Facebook, follow us on Twitter, Instagram, and LinkedIn. Email Patti and Michael with your most interesting and pressing questions on functional medicine: podcast@gdx.net. And, be sure to share your favorite Lab Report episodes with your friends and colleagues on social media to help others learn more about Genova and all things related to functional medicine and specialty lab testing. To find a qualified healthcare provider to connect you with Genova testing, or to access select products directly yourself, visit Genova Connect. Disclaimer: The content and information shared in The Lab Report is for educational purposes only and should not be taken as medical advice. The views and opinions expressed in The Lab Report represent the opinions and views of Michael Chapman and Patti Devers and their guests.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Wellness coach, Amber Shaw, discusses her history of disordered eating and how she found her life purpose in helping women over 40 find sustainable weight loss. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wellness coach Amber Shaw joins Squats and Margaritas to discuss her history of disordered eating and how she found her life purpose in helping women over 40 find sustainable weight loss. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you tired of feeling like you have to conform to society's expectations when it comes to relationships, wellness, and even physical appearance? Do you want to break free from the constraints of what is considered "normal" and embrace what truly makes you happy? Then you need to listen to this podcast episode! Amber Shaw and Kaitlin Anthony dive into the topics of authenticity, resilience, and self-care in this episode of The Wellness Revolution podcast. Kaitlin shares her personal story of overcoming limiting beliefs and finding internal fulfillment. Kaitlin Anthony is an empowerment coach, podcaster, and entrepreneur. Kaitlin always felt like she had an unfriendly relationship with women in general, which is ironic because she eventually fell in love with helping women love themselves. Through coaching, Kaitlin helps clients love their bodies and recover self-confidence for good. Amber and Kaitlin discuss diet culture and the best practices to change our lifestyle to achieve sustainable weight loss. At one point, Kaitlin herself was stuck in a cycle of losing weight, gaining it all back, losing again, and so on. She realized that people shouldn't focus so much on the result but more on the process. Falling in love with the process is the key. In addition, they talk about relationships, partnerships, and how important it is to feel supported when you are sharing life with someone. Kaitlin shares more about her own story, her divorce, and how she came to realize that life is more about what we want versus what we think it's supposed to be. Episode Resources Sign up to join Amber's exclusive private podcast event from June 19-21: ambershaw.com/private-podcast Get your HigherDOSE Sauna Blanket here and use code AMBER15 for 15% OFF! Key Highlights Kaitlin fell in love with coaching and helping other women love their bodies for good despite not always being super connected with women. Daily habits are crucial to losing weight: mindset, sleeping habits, and water intake are all key actions to pay attention to. Kaitlin realized that finding joy in the process is the key to a sustainable weight loss journey. The mentality that “I will only be happy when I lose x amount of weight” is more prejudicial than beneficial. Kaitlin talks about the process of her divorce, how she felt unsupported during her pregnancy, and how it all changed when she met her new partner. No one has power over you. Life is about what you want, not what you think it is supposed to be. Learn the best tips and strategies for a more productive morning and a more peaceful night. Connect with Kaitlin Instagram: @thebeamlife Connect with Amber Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com

Do you want to learn how to use food as medicine and heal from the inside out? Look no further than this episode of The Wellness Revolution podcast with host Amber Shaw and special guest Elissa Goodman, a cleanse expert and best-selling author. Elissa's journey began with a low white blood cell count as a child, leading to constant sickness and a reliance on sugar and caffeine for energy. After moving to New York and climbing the corporate ladder, she was diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma at the age of 32. Her husband was diagnosed with cancer at 43 and lost his battle a year and a half later. Elissa decided it was time to take her health more seriously and became an Integrative Holistic Nutritionist. This wake-up call led Elissa to therapy, self-help books, yoga, juicing, and other alternative healing methods. Elissa's story is a testament to the power of using food as medicine and taking control of your health. She emphasizes the importance of simple shifts in habits rather than focusing on outcomes. Elissa shares her expert insight on the power of juicing, intermittent fasting, and cellular hydration. According to Elissa, juicing is a great way to quickly and easily get essential nutrients into your bloodstream and cells. Elissa and Amber also discuss the importance of paying attention to added sugars, reducing inflammatory foods, incorporating whole foods into your diet, and reducing processed foods. Elissa's approach to health and wellness goes beyond just nutrition. She takes a holistic approach, looking at all aspects of her clients' lives to find the root cause of their health issues. Elissa's latest book talks more in-depth about her battle with cancer and her story. Check the link below. Related Links Cancer Hacks: A Holistic Guide to Overcoming Your Fears and Healing Cancer ARMRA Supplements Episode Resources Join the FREE Consistency Challenge here! Get your HigherDOSE Sauna Blanket here and use code AMBER15 for 15% OFF! Key Highlights Elissa's health issues inspired her to start helping others holistically Elissa's morning routine and morning diet and how it relates to intermittent fasting. Easy ways to make the gut function better and how to reset it Learn some of the food swaps to elevate health How to navigate processed foods for optimal health The writing process for Elissa's latest book and what people can expect from it Who Elissa's programs and offers are for Connect with Elissa Goodman: Instagram: @elissagoodman Website: elissagoodman.com Connect with Amber Shaw: Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com

This week on the podcast Mikki speaks with Amber Shaw, health and wellness coach about her Hormonal  Fat Loss Blueprint - the four pillars that will lead to sustainable fat loss for women. TThey dive into blood sugar regulation,  flexible intermittent fasting, exercise and stress management and how these need to be tackled as women move into their 40s and beyond.Amber Shaw is a Mind & Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution, a leading global movement for thousands of women over 40, empowering them to rediscover their confidence and create a lifestyle that is effortless and sustainable. As a motivational speaker, philanthropist, and internationally recognised authority in the health and wellness industry, Amber coaches women all across the world on achieving sustainable weight loss without dieting their way through life.As a Nationally Board-Certified Health and Wellness Coach and a Certified PersonalTrainer, Amber is committed to overhauling diet culture so women have the support and accountability they need to change their lives.Her insights have been featured in numerous media outlets like NBC, Fox, CBS, and Ask Us Beauty where she regularly contributes as the resident health and fitness expert.https://ambershaw.com/podcast/https://ambershaw.com/ Contact Mikki:https://mikkiwilliden.com/https://www.facebook.com/mikkiwillidennutritionhttps://www.instagram.com/mikkiwilliden/https://linktr.ee/mikkiwillidenSave 20% on all NuZest Products with the code MIKKI20 at www.nuzest.co.nzCurranz supplement: MIKKI saves you 25% at www.curranz.co.nz

Inability to lose weight, low energy, brain fog, bathroom issues, low libidio, dry skin, pain, insomnia, hot flashes, depression, wanting to just isolate…these are just a few symptoms of hormone imbalance. Not even a comprehensive list! The subject of hormone imbalance is a big one and today I'm giving you the top 8 tips to help promote happy hormones. I know you are tired of being on the struggle bus. Let's talk healthy happy hormones today on the Healthy Harmony podcast. This is a quick podcast that gives you an overview of the top tips that can help contribute to healthy, happy hormones. These tips are absolutely foundational before you explore any next steps. I'm listing the 8 tips and additional podcast references here for your convenience. I've got your back girl! Ditch the toxins. You need to reduce your toxic burden. I referenced the EWG Healthy Living app or ewg.org. Also, go check out the podcasts on toxicity that I have done with expert guests Toxic & Tired? Time to Get the Func Out! Balance your Hormones & Detox with Dr. Koz https://www.inspirehealthyharmony.com/getthefuncout.html and Ditch the Toxins, Lose Weight and Overcome Overwhelm with Dr. Wendie Trubow https://www.inspirehealthyharmony.com/ditch-the-toxins.html Show your Adrenal Glands some love. Solving the Mystery of Low Libido and Adrenal Fatigue with Dr. Renee Wellenstein https://www.inspirehealthyharmony.com/libido-and-adrenal-fatigue-1.html Fix your Fork. Focus on smart nutrition Natural Anti-Aging and Why Fat is not a Dirty Word with Dr. Cori Stern https://www.inspirehealthyharmony.com/01252023-episode109.html; Stop Starving Yourself - Weight Loss for Women over 40 with Amber Shaw https://www.inspirehealthyharmony.com/03012023-episode111.html; You are Not Choosing a Cult - How to Choose Real Foods for Families on a Budget https://www.inspirehealthyharmony.com/02152023-episode110.html Pump some iron. Strength training is crucial for women Lose the booze. Decrease or eliminate your alcohol intake Face it and deal with it. Address your mental and emotional health. Stay tuned for the May podcasts on this subject Prioritize sleep. Help me Sleep - Easy Tips to Help you Sleep Better and Live Better https://www.inspirehealthyharmony.com/03152023-episode112.html It's a big, huge subject but I hope you see how crucial it is to have a foundation for balanced hormones. And yes, as you heard I'm continuing my education and will be a hormone specialist after completing my 6-month mentorship. As I learn, you are going to learn too! Come on this journey with me! Here's to happy, healthy hormones in harmony! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/inspirehealthyharmony/message

In this episode I chat with Amber Shaw (@msambershaw). She helps women 40+ transform their mind and body without dieting their way through life. She's also the host of the Wellness Revolution Podcast.  She gives stellar advice around dieting, exercise, mindset ⤵️ 3 reasons to ditch calorie counting How to uncomplicate weight loss Why "dieting" may actually be causing weight gain in the long run This episode was so good! I hope you enjoy it too!  Follow Amber - Click here Join her FREE CHALLENGE Please leave a review if you enjoyed this episode~ 

In the latest episode of the Simply Fit Podcast, I have the pleasure of speaking with Amber Shaw Amber is a mind & body transformation coach, host of the wellness revolution podcast whose main focus is helping women over the age of 40 achieve food freedom. Navigating your health and wellbeing in your 20s and 30s is difficult for many of us. But what about when you hit your 40s, your 50s and 60s. With the stressors of life and the responsibilities we face at this age and after years of countless diets and abuse done to our bodies, it doesn't make things easy. Which is why Amber has committed herself to empowering women and taking it back to basics to help them achieve the health and bodies they want, without going through another cycle of dieting. In this episode you can expect to learn: How you can stop dieting and achieve food freedom. What are some of the changes to expect as you go through your 20s, 30s and 40s. Along with what Amber at the age of 44 does to keep herself shape and how she plans to do this in her 50s and 60s Connect with me on Instagram: @elliothasoon Let's work together: www.ehcoaching.co.uk Get Free Workout Plans: https://bit.ly/EHWorkoutsYT Connect with Amber: @msambershaw Listen To Amber's Podcast: https://ambershaw.com/podcast/ Please rate us 5* on Apple Podcasts and leave us a review if you're enjoying the podcast. Don't forget to subscribe too so that you don't miss any future episodes.

Today, on the Scheer Madness Podcast, Rachel is joined by Amber Shaw, a Mind & Body Transformation Expert, Host & Founder of The Wellness Revolution, a leading global movement for thousands of women over 40, empowering them to rediscover their confidence and create a lifestyle that is effortless and sustainable. Amber dives into the flaws in “dieting”, fueled by the “dieting industry” for profits. Once the diet is over, however, Amber points out that many go back to their old lifestyle of poor health. Amber sheds light on how she takes a different approach to nurturing and motivating a healthy lifestyle for her clients. For more information about working with our team at Rachel Scheer Nutrition, book a free 30-minute call at www.rachelscheer.com/application and learn more about functional wellness coaching at https://rachelscheer.com/functional-wellness-coaching/Listen ON:Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/scheer-madness/id1490423541 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5OLd9BtesW7Oe4nSH0QF9W Chapters:0:00 Intro4:26 What Inspired Amber to Help People with Their Health?16:33 The Spiritual Side of My Journey30:10 The Difference between a Diet vs Healthy Lifestyle41:30 Working with Clients who Don't Like Healthy Foods49:40 Working with Weight-Loss Clients who Don't Like Diets56:14 How to Connect with Amber57:24 OutroConnect with Rachel:Website | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube20% off on all Paleo Valley Productshttps://paleovalley.com/promos/rachel-scheer-podcast-page 

Weight loss. Sustainable weight loss. The kind of weight that you lose and it stays gone. Is that possible and is that likely over the age of 40? Yes, it is my friend! On today's show, we have body transformation expert Amber Shaw and we are tackling the hot topic of weight loss. Could it be that there is more to weight loss than just eat less and move more? Let's stop with the bro code and realize that a woman's body is different. Listen as we hit on the crucial topics of calorie counting, nutrition, food satisfaction, how to honor your cravings, intuitive eating and the specific types of exercise you need to achieve results. Our guest today is Amber Shaw. Amber is a Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution. She has extensively coached thousands of women (age 40+) from all across the world to get off the crazy train of dieting and find true food freedom so they can feel empowered, confident and sexy. You can connect with Amber at www.ambershaw.com Let's get off the hamster wheel of stuffing yourself and then starving yourself and learn how to honor your body to achieve true sustainable weight loss. It's all today on the Healthy Harmony podcast. Oh hey! Before you go, I know you are looking for community. You are looking for encouragement and accountability on your health journey. Well, if that's the case then you need to join the Facebook group FM for Weight loss - Mind, Body Soul Wellness for Women. This is a beautiful group just for women. Join us here https://bit.ly/FMwomenswellness PS...Remember you cannot go from one extreme to another. I want you to be thinking what is one thing, one small change that I can make today to improve my health tomorrow. I hope you enjoyed the episode with Amber Shaw. Join me next time as I continue on the conversation on weight loss and some common obstacles that you need to address to get the weight off. Yep. The title of this podcast Poop and Sleep - The 2 Secrets to Weight Loss and Living your Best Life. Until then, take it one change at a time, one day at a time. You've got this. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/inspirehealthyharmony/message

Join us on Think Unbroken Podcast, where we explore the crucial connection between mental health and nutrition. Our guests, Brian Keane, Amber Shaw, and Uma Naidoo, will dive into the latest research and share their expert insights on how proper nutrition can improve our mental wellness. Discover how to nourish your mind and body for optimal health, and learn practical tips for integrating nutritious habits into your daily routine. Don't miss this informative and inspiring episode of Nourishing Your Mind!************* LINKS & RESOURCES *************Learn how to heal and overcome childhood trauma, narcissistic abuse, ptsd, cptsd, higher ACE scores, anxiety, depression, and mental health issues and illness. Learn tools that therapists, trauma coaches, mindset leaders, neuroscientists, and researchers use to help people heal and recover from mental health problems. Discover real and practical advice and guidance for how to understand and overcome childhood trauma, abuse, and narc abuse mental trauma. Heal your body and mind, stop limiting beliefs, end self-sabotage, and become the HERO of your own story. Download the first three chapters of the Award-Winning Book Think Unbroken: Understanding and Overcoming Childhood Trauma: https://book.thinkunbroken.com/ Join the Think Unbroken Trauma Transformation Course: https://coaching.thinkunbroken.com/ @Michael Unbroken: https://www.instagram.com/michaelunbroken/ Follow us on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@michaelunbroken Learn more at https://www.thinkunbrokenpodcast.com

Are you a woman in midlife who struggles with health and wellness? You're not alone. So many of us have tried every diet on the planet with only minimal success and never the lasting results we desire. Today's guest, Amber Shaw, is a mind and body transformation expert, motivational speaker, and internationally recognized authority in the health and wellness industry. At age 40, she left her sales career of 18 years, got divorced, and went all in on her dream! Join Hilary and Amber as they get real about what it takes to transform your body and mind after age 40, and what you can start doing now to feel confident, empowered, and free.About Our Guest: Amber Shaw is a Mind & Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution, a leading global movement for thousands of women over 40, empowering them to rediscover their confidence and create a lifestyle that is effortless and sustainable. As a motivational speaker, philanthropist, and internationally recognized authority in the health and wellness industry, Amber coaches women all across the world on achieving sustainable weight loss without dieting their way through life.Amber's work is motivated by her own powerful transformation after a particularly difficult season of life. Throughout her 30s she found herself in a lucrative but unfulfilling career, in a crumbling marriage and at a tipping point after years of struggling with weight & body image issues. At the age of 40, Amber took radical ownership of her life, went on an intentional journey to heal from the inside out, and finally stopped being at war with her body. Committed to finding the purpose in her own pain, Amber took The Wellness Revolution from a side hustle to a full-time pursuit and in less than a year, she built a six-figure business helping other women transform their lives as well.As a Nationally Board-Certified Health and Wellness Coach and a Certified Personal Trainer, Amber is committed to overhauling diet culture so women have the support and accountability they need to change their lives. Her insights have been featured in numerous media outlets like NBC, Fox, CBS, and Ask Us Beauty where she regularly contributes as the resident health and fitness expert. Amber is a sought-after speaker who has taken the stage at health and wellness events such as Fitposium and The RD Entrepreneur Symposium. She also shares her expertise on her highly-rated bi-weekly podcast, The Wellness Revolution, which has featured noteworthy guests like Gabby Bernstein, Anthony Trucks, Julie Solomon, and Dr. Jade Teta.Amber's mission is to help millions of women worldwide heal their relationship with food and themselves while empowering them to transform their lives, love their bodies and create lasting results.https://www.facebook.com/msambershawhttps://www.instagram.com/msambershaw/Join our private Facebook community for BONUS content to ignite your own relaunch: https://www.facebook.com/groups/232280334811612/Interested in being a guest on The ReLaunch Podcast or booking Hilary as a guest? Email us at hello@therelaunchco.com

I've struggled with my body image, weight and self-esteem for as long as I can remember. As a kid who grew up in the 90s, diet culture was at it's full-time high. After many years of therapy, personal growth and becoming an expert in the field, I've thankfully realized the only way to get the health I desired, was to heal from the inside out. This week, I bring the inspiring mind and body coach, Amber Shaw, who also believes in the power of mindset and learning to love ourselves. She brings her expertise and charisma to this community, and answers some great questions about how to stop the yoyo dieting and self-sabotage. Although Amber specializes in helping women over 40, this episode contains something for everyone! What's in this episode: How Amber started her journey into the world of health and fitness The problem with having an “all or nothing” strategy Why diets are bullshit and will never be sustainable  The danger in outsourcing our joy to things like external beauty or the validation from other people The secret to long lasting health, according to Amber it isn't nutrition Tips to get started on your health journey right away Connect with Amber Shaw on Instagram, her website or her podcast! On Jan 17th I'm leading a 90min EnvisionHER Masterclass to teach you my proven method to clarify your vision, banish the burnout and learn to ask for your needs. Your registration includes my new journal, which will serve as your guide and accountability for 90 days after the class! This is the class you've been waiting for. Use this link to grab your seat: https://www.thebeamlife.com/offers/YB4VdzjL/checkout

With there being a lot of smoke and mirrors on social media, the power of vulnerability has become even more evident. Vulnerability connects us, and that is all we really want. We all want to be loved, understood, and to feel like we are not alone. Through sharing our experiences, we can turn our pain into purpose and let others know that we have a choice to make our pain temporary and take charge of our lives to reach our most confident, empowered, and free self. In this episode with Mind and Body Transformation Expert Amber Shaw, you will be empowered to learn to truly love who you see in the mirror.Amber Shaw is the Founder of The Wellness Revolution, a Motivational Speaker, and Internationally Recognized Authority in the Health and Wellness Industry. She is a National Board Certified Health & Wellness Coach, Integrative Nutrition Health Coaching, Certified ISSA Group Fitness, and Certified ISSA Personal Trainer. In her 20s, Amber overcame an eating disorder but found getting herself continuing the vicious cycle of deprivation dieting into her 30s. Finding herself miserable in her own skin, Amber knew there had to be a better way. She gave up all the dieting and found true food freedom, and did extensive inner work to learn to truly love and accept herself. Now she has transformed the lives of thousands of women to rediscover their confidence and live a lifestyle that is effortless and sustainable.In this episode, Amber gets real and honest about the painful journey that led her to where she is today, and her realization that things in life happen FOR us, and not TO us. From the outside, Amber's life looked perfect. She had a great job and a picture-perfect family, but inside, she was miserable. By tapping into her intuition through just getting quiet with herself, she transformed her life and wants the same for you. Tune in to Amber's story of healing and hope.Key highlights:Amber's backstory of getting to where she is nowOur intuition is our direct line to a higher spirit We have only one purpose: to know we are loveable Getting to the root of our addictions and self-destructive behaviors Doing inner work isn't about becoming a different person, it is about having the tools to not go down a rabbit hole and to show up for life differently As women we are so hard on ourselves and don't allow ourselves to celebrate our strength and how far we have come, so it is time to change thatPain can have tremendous power if we let it and we have a choice in how we respond to itLeaning into the idea of “Things happen FOR us not TO us”Amber's words for someone in pain and her intention of sharing her storyEpisode resources:Book: The Universe Has Your Back by Gabby Bernstein Connect with Amber Shaw:Instagram: @msambershawTikTok: @msambershawWebsite: ambershaw.comPodcast: The Wellness Revolution Podcast with Amber ShawConnect with Alison:Instagram: @alisonanswers | @lagercounselingWebsite: LagerCounseling.comYouTube: Alison AnswersFacebook: Alison Lager Lcsw Casac

Tracy was a recent guest on The Wellness Revolution Podcast with Amber Shaw. Amber is a Mind & Body Transformation Expert, Founder of The Wellness Revolution, Motivational Speaker, and Internationally Recognized Authority in the Health and Wellness Industry. Listen to the entire episode, #120, How to achieve sustainable weight loss on Spotify at https://open.spotify.com/episode/04hoDgP6ThEKhX5aRueTCx?si=e2b9e2ba8766418b or Apple at https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/twr-120-how-to-achieve-sustainable-weight-loss-with/id1577282350?i=1000586542121 Key Highlights Reverse-architecting your mind to set yourself free of what holds you back The four basics of sustainable weight loss How weight loss can lead to professional growth Quitting alcohol for good

My guest on this week's Best You Podcast episode is Amber Shaw. Amber is a Mind & Body Transformation Expert, Founder of The Wellness Revolution, Motivational Speaker, and Internationally Recognized Authority in the Health and Wellness Industry. Health and fitness have always been a part of her life but not always in a healthy way. Check out the episode to learn more about how she was able to overcome her eating disorder, the keys to sustainable weight loss, how to abandon guilt and shame, how to not let perfectionism get the best of your eating habits, how much protein you should eat, the things she eats on a regular basis to maximize gut health and much more._____________________________In this episode:3:58 - What was your experience like with having an eating disorder and how did you help yourself out of that situation?7:31 - What do you think lead you down the road of bulimia and how do you think parents should teach their kids about having a proper relationship with food?  12:45 - How did you start to break down your perfectionist mindset so that it didn't continue to hold you back? 16:39 - What are some of the strategies you've used to deal with shame and help give yourself grace? 20:50 - What is ghrelin and how can it contribute to people feeling hungry more often than they should be?  29:10 - In your experience, what kind of quality and quantity of protein would you typically recommend to your clients?  34:35 - Talk about some food choices that you try to eat on a regular basis and why those are your most important food choices?37:16 - How can someone tell if they have issues with their gut bacteria and what can they do to help fix those issues? 43:42 - Amber's 3 key's to getting closer to her best self_____________________________Amber's 3 Keys to Getting Closer to Her Best Self:Be more consistent with her quiet timeContinue to let go of some imposter syndromeCreate more space in her day to just be and not do_____________________________Follow Amber on Social Media:Website: http://www.ambershaw.com/Instagram: @msambershawFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/msambershawTikTok: @msambershaw_____________________________Want to try out the 10 Week Transformation - THE premiere results oriented fitness program?Go to: https://www.nickcarrier.com/10wt to learn more and get signed up!____________________________Start Getting Your Eating Habits On Track So You No Longer Fear the Scale, But You Have Confidence In Your Body!https://www.nickcarrier.com/6rules____________________________Follow Nick on Instagram: @carrier_bestyou

“When it comes to huge openings, a lot of people think of me.” We watched Hedwig and the Angry Inch with our friend Amber Shaw and we're ready for a car wash! We talk about our introduction to this queer classic through the stage production, various versions of the soundtrack and the still-rockin' after 20 years movie. John Cameron Mitchell's snappy dialogue is hilarious and the music by Stephen Trask is face-melting rock and roll that can bring you to tears.  We also have to talk about the Glamour - my goodness, the glamour!  The wigs, the makeup, the costumes!  Any drag queen worth her wig glue owes a debt to Hedwig just like Hedwig owes a bit of her look to certain legends of drag *cough* Jackie Beat *cough cough*.  Pour yourself a vermouth on the rocks, grab your wig in a box and get ready for some Eastern bloc Rock! Thanks for listening and don't forget to subscribe, rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! www.patreon.com/moviesthatmadeusgay Facebook/Instagram: @moviesthatmadeusgay Twitter: @MTMUGPod Scott Youngbauer: Twitter @oscarscott / Instagram @scottyoungballer Peter Lozano: Twitter/Instagram @peterlasagna

Every single business owner has a different journey toward success and how you achieve success (and what success looks like to you) will differ from your peers. But no matter what you went through or what you offer, if you're in alignment and are providing a solution to a problem people need to solve, you can absolutely build a successful business!    Today I am talking to rockstar health coach and business maven, Amber Shaw, who built an incredible business helping women over 40 stop dieting and transform their lives, love their bodies and create lasting results. Amber is sharing her journey from navigating an unhealthy relationship with her body to building a business helping other women overcome similar issues.    During our conversation, we talked about everything from turning pain into purpose, finding self-healing by overcoming your fears, why success is about creating habits, the importance of list building and showing up for your people, and so much more.    Connect with Amber: Website: www.ambershaw.com Free Gift: www.ambershaw.com/fasting  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/msambershaw/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/msambershaw  TikTok: @msambershaw

How do females work with their hormones for ideal health? Brad and Lesley recap the stabilizing convo with Jenny Swisher, discussing the importance of a having a healthy period, how to get enough protein in the day, and the value of tracking your cycle. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Why having a period is key to your health Your hormones and gut being off impacts other functionsThe importance of tracking your cycleResearch for dieting, fasting, and working is skewed towards men How cycle syncing your workouts impacts your energy levelsDefining what makes you an expert at somethingHow to know if your getting enough protein The value in tracking your cycleEpisode References/Links:Beyond the Pill: A 30-Day Program to Balance Your Hormones, Reclaim Your Body, and Reverse the Dangerous Side Effects of the Birth Control Pill Hardcover – Illustrated, January 29, 2019 by Jolene BrightenHormone Imbalance QuizTracking Your Menstrual CycleSYNC Your Life Podcast  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.Be It Till You See It Podcast SurveyUse this link to get your Toe Sox!ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the stabilizing convo I had with Jenny Swisher in our last episode, if you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now and go back and listen to that one. And then come back and join us. (Brad: Yeah.) I think it could also have been a synchronicity, or a synchronized synchronized convo because that would go with her SYNC. Anyways, just just my notes. Oh my God, I love my team. Okay. So y'all, we are literally flying to Chicago as you if you're listening to in real time.Brad Crowell  No, we're in. We're in Chicago cur... at the current moment. (Lesley: Well, no.) Yeah, (Lesley: We're not.) we're in Chicago.Lesley Logan  We fly at night. Okay. I love it. Now we'll start over that. We are, so we're currently in Chicago at Pilates on tour. It's my first time back to Pilates on tour for Balanced Body speaking for them since 2019, actually. So that's really exciting. And I brought Brad this time, because last time I just, I did it alone. And it's way more fun when Brad's there. So mostly because people just go, "Where's Brad?" And so it's just easier to bring him and then they can ask him how he's doing. Also, if you're not in Chicago, we got something special going on. Y'all, remember John Mollura from the pod and we actually had him do a course for us at Profitable Pilates. And it's really great. It is all about like, getting past your like imposter syndrome. And y'all I know that this is a course you're like, "Oh, yeah, I need to do that." And then you'll like, "I won't buy that one because you're like, I need this strategy on how to actually get more clients." I promise you right now. What's keeping you from work clients is not a strategy. It's your mindset. And so you need this course. And it's 30% off this week only. And if you're listening to this, and you know, a year from now, it's not on sale, but it's still great. And you should get it. It's like amazing stuff. And then we come back and sale is over. We have our Vegas retreat at our house. (Brad: Yeah.) We are so excited. My sister is coming up to help us, which is really, it's gonna be so fun.Brad Crowell  Yeah, it's gonna be an amazing week. We're gonna be doing Pilates in the morning and digging into the customer journey for businesses for both brick and mortar and online businesses. (Lesley: Yeah.) Plus, we're gonna have a photo shoot.Lesley Logan  I know. So fun ...Brad Crowell  ... we've got another a new restaurant that we're bringing for lunches. You're ...Lesley Logan  We're, we're so obsessed with this place. (Brad: Yeah.) We had them deliver every meal during the week of Mini. And then because I'm not sick of it yet. They are also delivering (Brad: Yeah.) our lunches for the retreat, which I'm so stoked about. (Brad: Yeah.) It's amazing local restaurant. And then we recover from all this, and then we head out to Cambodia.Brad Crowell  Yeah, we do. I can't wait ...Lesley Logan  Yeah. Oh my gosh. If you are wanting to get the course it's profitablepilates.com/courses. If you're wanting to come on the Cambodia retreat, it is lesleylogan.co/retreat. These links are in the show notes and there's a really fun thing you can do on your phone, everyone, you just go to the pod, and you'll see it. It's like a play or a pause thing. And if you just keep swiping it up, it actually has a bunch of notes that our team does a really good job, making sure you can get all the bullet points, (Brad: Yeah.) our Instagram handles all the links to anything I talk about, like I just like, say something and then they're like, "Oh, here's the link for that." So they're all there to help you out.Brad Crowell  Absolutely. Yeah, I think and bravo our team spends a tons of time putting everything together just for you. So if you haven't ever checked that out, take a peek.Lesley Logan  Yeah, so we're gonna talk about Jenny Swisher today.Brad Crowell  Yeah, but first we had an audience question. And this is two recaps in a row. It's a very personal question. So this is another one for Lesley. And, again, talking about personal health. And the question was, "Is it true that there was a number of years where you never had your period?"Lesley Logan  Correct. There was many years. I didn't really, I, you know, like I was definitely of the generation of woman who's like, "I don't want a period." And I hope someday that we like teach children, boys and girls what a period is. We talked about that with Jenn Pike on her episode. Because it would be really great if we didn't see this negative thing. Anyways, I, it was inconsistent through junior high in high school, and I did have one, they were awful. And so when I was put on birth control to make them easier, I ended up ended up getting a blood clot, actually. But I was on a particularly new birth control and my doctors had told me that the blood clot was from the car accident and I was in and not from the patch I was on. And so, which I was like, "Okay, well, that makes sense. Like the blood clot was in the same way the head injury, no big deal, I was on bedrest." But then when I met with a doctor years later, and I told her about my family history, she looked at everything she was like, "You should not be on hormones." So then she took me off the birth control, which by the way, birth control, which as you all know, is not a real period. So it was just telling my body to have a period. But I actually like you're not going through a cycle. So when I got off the birth control, it's not abnormal. I didn't have one, because my body had to like, re figure out what it does, but it had never figured that before the birth control. So like, it just, I had no idea what normal was for me. And so it didn't come back, I went through acupuncture for fertility, just to bring it back, and it didn't bring it back. And so it took, it took a copper IUD to bring it back. And I don't necessarily recommend that I wish I'd had. I wish I had ...Brad Crowell  Or even, even after that, you know, with your health,Lesley Logan  I lost it during, I lost it during my health stuff, because I got too lean. So I got my body fat percentage went too low.Brad Crowell  Yeah, and high stress (Lesley: Yeah.) and the lack of sleep (Lesley: Yeah.) and the combination of all the things that were those (Lesley: Yeah.) that were going on (Lesley: I forgot about that period of time.) like basically eliminate your body was just like, we're just gonna skip this part of it.Lesley Logan  Yeah, we're not doing that. Your body will do some interesting things that keep you fucking alive. So so at any rate, I wish I had known what I know now about things like I think I would have, I think I would have handled it all differently to get the period back at the first place. And I think I would have been ...Brad Crowell  What does that specifically mean? What would you have done? Lesley Logan  So there is a book called the After the Pill or Beyond the Pill, After the Pill. And it is it really is a very educational book on like, what happens when you go off birth control ... (Brad: Beyond the Pill.) Yeah.Brad Crowell  And that is A 30-Day bal... Program to Balance Your Hormones, Reclaim Your Body, Reverse the Dangerous Side Effects of the Birth Control Pill. (Lesley: Yeah.) And that is by Jolene Brighten, Doctor.Lesley Logan  Yeah, yeah, so I wish I had had like just any preparation whatsoever for that. And I also wish I would have known how key to your health having a period is, like how it actually is a natural period is, how it is a sign of things working out well. And I I think I probably also when I lost it again, during my health with my stomach would have probably been able to fight a little bit more for myself or at least done more research myself if I really understood the power and have it all and it and now we're good, we're good to go. Everything is and what we're learning with a new cycle is because we don't have the IUD anymore. So ladies if you are on some sort of birth control, I'm not saying get off of it, I am saying it is worth educating yourself around those things and because there are there are things around long term birth control use that are not great. However I didn't have one I I also didn't have doctors around me that were concerned. Their was their responses really were well it just takes time. Well you didn't you were on this roll so it takes time. My my acupuncturist seemed very concerned I was trying her darndest Jamie had me drinking every fucking tea weird, tea out of the sun. So awful but um if you are someone who is excited to skip your period or how are you are with that one and not really worried about it, I'm not saying go get stressed out about it because I would never want you to do that but it is it is important important part of like the the female body and the health of it and and you know go back and listen to Jenn Pike's episode. I might have brought up on Dr. Bender's episode and then Jenny Swisher is is also she's got so much information for you. You should check out her site and I'm trying out this little doodad.Brad Crowell  She's about to release an app.Lesley Logan  Yeah, she's got an app and I'm I'm trying out this little doodad.That she's got because basically just saying your hormones are off and if your hormones are off (Brad: Yeah.) it is a it's only a matter of time before it's not just your sexual hormones that are off. It's going to affect your sleep. It's gonna affect your digestion and we're all we're not compartments.Brad Crowell  Yeah, this is a perfect, perfect transition right into talking about our guest, Jenny Swisher.Lesley Logan  Yeah, let's talk about her.Brad Crowell  Okay, now let's talk about Jenny Swisher. From a struggle that started in her 20s having to do with chronic migraines, and hormone imbalances, Jenny Swisher has been on a lifetime journey to have of self discovery and becoming her own best doctor. She is a Holistic Health Coach, a mom, she's an advocate for women working with their hormones, for total wellness, and hormones is the key. It's really, really an interesting conversation what you have with her. Stuff I never thought about, didn't know about, really fascinating. Her mission is to bridge the gap between the medical community and functional wellness. So I, I it was a very revealing conversation. I know that we described it as a stabilizing convo, it is stabilizing. But but first off, she talked about she talked about stuff that I had never really considered before. And the logic that she presented behind it was was pretty straightforward. And I was like, "Oh, okay, well, this is important. (Lesley: Yeah.) I don't know, why I never knew this before."Lesley Logan  Well, I think what's interesting, I, I'm gonna sound like some weirdo. But I just need to say this. Most of the issues that we have the solution to the problem has very little to do with drugs. (Brad: Right.) And because no one can make money off of the solution. No one promotes a solution. But really, like, it is it's it's it's very interesting thing that if we just had these answers from when we were children getting to know our bodies, then we would know things were off. SoBrad Crowell  Yeah, what I wanted to, I'm just going to quickly recap and I'll keep this brief here because you can, and you should go back and listen to her episode. But for context about what were the points we're going to go through here, I think, I think that it's important to remember, she talks about the four legged chair. (Lesley: Oh, yeah.) The analogy of how your hormone, your hormones, your endocrine system, like the four legs of the endocrine system. And the first leg is your sex hormone, sex hormones, which she said is progesterone, and other things. The second is your cortisol or your adrenals and that's your sleep and stress. The third is your thyroid. And then the last is your blood sugar. And so your hor... sex hormones, cortisol, your thyroid and your blood sugar. Those are the four legs of your hormonal, your endocrine system. And she said they all sit on top of your gut health. Right. So your gut health will affect each and every one of those. And they all will affect each other because she obviously said if you cut off an inch of your, you know, the leg for the, you know, your thyroid, it's going to affect the other three legs because the (Lesley: Yeah.) chair will be wobbly. Right. So those are what one we're what we're about to go through with the different points that we're talking about. Just keep that in mind, she's talking about the four leg, four legs of your hormone your endocrine system.Lesley Logan  Yeah. So what I love that she said I love that she brought up is that research for dieting, fasting, working out has been done mostly on men. So like, and this is very true. This is not an opinion. Like there's so much research on this. We've been one of our favorite shows John Oliver even did a whole thing on this. And there was a whole science experiment on this like cancer research on ovaries and the people didn't have ovaries there were men, they were men. (Brad: Right.) And so it's like, what the...Brad Crowell  How are you possibly doing research on a body that doesn't have the organs.Lesley Logan  Yeah. And so this means the typical workout calendar schedule is not designed for women. So if you are trying to lose weight or get healthy, whatever, whatever that means to you and or just have a better sleep cycle. A lot of the research out there is for a men's hormonal cycle which is 24 hours and ours is between 28 and 31 or 32 days, so it's just not going to work. So she brought up you can cycle sync your workouts for maximum benefits, which is like you could your, and there, you could compare your workouts to your hormones. So it's like, I do this all the time I use an app that helps me just like tells me like, "Oh, these are the types of workouts you can do right now." (Brad: Yeah.) And so it's actually made a massive difference in my energy levels, my ability to recover from a workout, my, my improvements, the strengths I've been able to make. And I also am a lot kinder to myself when I fucking don't feel like it. (Brad: Yeah.) Oh, well that.Brad Crowell  Also, too, I think that, you know, from the sitting on the sidelines here, it helps me as your partner to know, why are you not doing the thing? Right. Because it was specifically for me work, we work together, y'all. If you didn't figure that out. We filmed classes for OPC. And often she would have them on her calendar. And it would be, like, really stressful for me when she had to film during the week. And I was like, "This sucks. I don't want to be around you when you're filming classes." Because if something would go wrong, it was like a really big deal. If something got like, if there was loud noises, it would become a really big deal. And I was like, "I can't control everything. I try but it's not possible." And it was super stressful for me. And it felt like I was walking on eggshells, and then ...Lesley Logan  We moved the classes to a different week of my cycle. (Brad: Yeah, you ...) Yeah, it's like so much fun.Brad Crowell  Yeah, I didn't think about this. But like, we were just like, "Okay, on the second week of every month, you're gonna film and that was just our work schedule." Right. And so not just your work out schedule, but you know, working to this will affect your work. And then when we when you said, "Hey, what if we changed it?" And then and you explained me why I was like, "I mean, for me, I was like, whatever, I don't care, we'll move it to whatever other week it doesn't matter." And it has been night and day difference for me.Lesley Logan  Yeah. Yeah. And, and actually, because, um, because my cycle at is was eight days and now without the IUD is like four days where we're on a journey ... (Brad: Yeah.) had to change the week that it's happening. And this is gonna piss up everybody because like, I was gonna switch it but at the same time, like it, I really do ...Brad Crowell  But you're aware of that. (Lesley: Yes.) Like, that's amazing.Lesley Logan  Yeah. And so I, I'm, I was like, I this is not something I am a professional knowledge person. And like Jenny is, but like, ever since I discovered this and like, how many experts can I get on the show to talk about this, because most of people listening this are females, or identify as one. And the reality is that you are going to have days where you do not want to show up in front of people. (Brad: Sure.) So when you are aware of that in your cycle, you give yourself permission to go go inward and and reflect on what you've done this month, what has worked, what's going on, and then you make plans for when you're ready to bloom up and like be out there in the world. So you can 'be it till you see it' during those days where it feels so comfortable. So ready, instead of like fighting with it and trying to make sure that every single day it looks like the next day. You're not a dude. It's not gonna work. (Brad: You're not a dude. Yeah.) Now they have their own thing they have to worry about but that's a different person's be it till you see it podcast.Brad Crowell  Well, I really loved that. She said, you can become obsessed with something to the point where you become an expert.Lesley Logan  I know I think some people get a little weird about like their obsession around things. And it's like it goes back to last week's episode, like your pain becomes your program like friggin why not you be the expert if ... Brad Crowell  Well, I definitely I understand this. But I, but I I got a little weird about you know, Jenny Swisher has been on a lifetime journey of self discovery and becoming her own best doctor. And literally that one word 'doctor' made me go, "How can she be her own best doctor?" Right. And I think that not in a literal sense of I went to med school and I've got a degree from University that note says I had the title of doctor, but more in the figurative sense of a doctor supposed to be a proponent of your health, is supposed to be able to help you in your health. And so you know, you she became obsessed with something meaning the anatomy of you know, her female anatomy, her like the inner workings of her body, how it was all working and specifically the struggles that she was having from migraines, right because she said the migraines were debilitating. They weren't just like, "Oh, I had an headache." It was like two days of her 100% out commission could not function migraine and how does that happen? And her conclusion after not been getting the results that she needed from going to a doctor was "oh my hormones are actually affecting the what my migraines. And specifically, it was when she had gone off of birth control. And so and she said, it took her years to put the dots together and be like, when I stopped birth control, I started getting migraines. She didn't know how she didn't see it before, but suddenly became very clear. And then okay, now, how can I resolve that since I don't want to go back on birth control? And that literally sent her down this whole path.Lesley Logan  Yeah, so she is her own best doctor, because doctors were not able to put those together either.Brad Crowell  And now she can legitimately say I'm an expert on these things. I mean, she's, she's been studying it for, you know, (Lesley: years) years, right. (Lesley: years) She's been working in it, studying it, talking about it, reading about and all these things for so many years. And so while she may not be able to be hired to diagnose someone, in a medical sense, from that way, she can provide you a lot of information around the subjects (Lesley: Well ...) from her own experience.Lesley Logan  I think she has a course and it goes back to all the things she's developing. And then you can take that information. Brad Crowell  She actually has a quiz. (Lesley: Yeah, you can ...) yeah, the hormone imbalance quiz. And we will make sure to include that we included in the show notes of last last episode, we will include it again in this one.Lesley Logan  And then you can take all that information, and then you can go back to Jessica Valant's episode, and then advocate for yourself where it is needed. And I think I was so excited to have these two women back to back because I like I said in the last episode, I really do see, one of the big things holding women back from showing up the way they want to on this planet is their health issues. And, and one can be also around their cycle, if your cycle is off. Again, there are we talked about it, I believe in Jenn Pike's episode like about the different phases of your cycle. And the truth is, is if you are trying to do something outside of what your cycle wants to do, you're not going to feel very good about it. And then you're going to, and then because most women who listen to this, do this, you start to shame blame judge yourself. (Brad: Sure.) And then that spirals you out of being it till you see it. And so I really want...Brad Crowell  Yeah and then it jacks up your habits that you've created for yourself, because you know, it just hijacks everything.Lesley Logan  Hijacks everything. So I (Brad: Yeah.) just really, I really wanted to have these two ladies together. And like I said, I'll have more women's health advocates on because I really do see like, sometimes it's not the next habits or mindset mantra is oftentimes like your body and how you feel in it (Brad: Yeah.) and all that. So anyways, I like what you liked.Brad Crowell  And I think also too, there's a there's this idea of the 10,000 hours, you're an expert in your field or that kind of stuff. I mean, I think that one of the exercises that I love to do with those who come through Agency, our fitness business coaching program, is I work backwards with them and I say, okay, how long have you been teaching? And they say, oh, 10 years. Okay, amazing. How long did you study before you were allowed to teach? Oh, a year, two years, something like that. Okay, what are the certification programs that you did? How many hours were those programs? Oh, 600 hours. 200 hours. Oh, it was a weekend. Oh, it was a it was a whole year. Whatever. Right. And then, okay, how much have you been teaching in that time? Oh, I've been teaching, you know, 10 clients a week for eight years. Amazing. Add up all those hours, what what, you know, you're probably like, you have you've probably 1000s of hours of experience under your belt with this thing that you're doing, whether it's yoga, or Pilates or whatever it is. And the reality is, the more you stay focused on something, the more you are an expert at it. So it's, it's plausible to also look at your life and be like, "Wow, I'm an expert in this thing." (Lesley: Yeah.) So that's pretty cool.Lesley Logan  It is really cool. I really think I think she's amazing. I really am into what she's doing. So I hope you all are having fun getting synced with her.Brad Crowell  All right, so finally let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your conversation with Jenny Swisher?I'm gonna go first, we're gonna make sure you're eating enough of the right foods. Okay. And she said, specifically, most women, it needs to increase their protein intake.Lesley Logan  Oh, most people we just told my fath, my father, (Brad: Yeah, your dad, the same thing.) Yeah, most people are not actually eating enough protein. And ladies, especially as you're going into menopause, you're gonna frickin want to do that. So I say that because like, I think it's I think that's the next phase that I'm going to my life and I like like, where's the protein? So, but yeah, I love this. I love this take and I think so I think you just, I don't know, most women ... most women increase their protein intake. I'm not really sure how to help you with that as far I was like, obviously, there's shakes and there's animal proteins, I would definitely make sure if you're taking doing shakes, please watch the ingredients that are put into these things, make sure they come from a reputable source, like do your research, but also count them. Like ...Brad Crowell  Yeah, I think that's what we can recommend to you. Because we can't tell you if protein is what you need more of or not. It's just a generalization. But what Jenny was saying is that you have to be eating the right foods. How do you know if you're eating the right foods? That's something that you're gonna have to figure out with bloodwork and doctors and stuff like that where you know, you know, like, "Oh, I'm going to need more of this thing."Lesley Logan  I think a simple thing you can do though, is just for one week, track your protein like look at if you're having like a chicken breasts, like, like weigh the chicken breasts, so you can find out how much protein is in that you don't have to weight it forever. But like, once you have an idea, like, oh, the chicken breasts, the size of my hand is this much protein. (Brad: Yeah.) Then you'll always know that. And so you can you don't have to do this forever. You don't have to, like I know, like, for a lot of people, like the last thing they want to do is actually count their grams of protein. But it's not the same as counting calories. It's very specific. And so you can see on average, how much you're getting. And it really I have heard from many, many a medical professional a gram for every pound weight. Or ...Brad Crowell  So this is macros. Is this what we're talking about effectively. (Lesley: Yeah, yeah, yeah.) Which I know nothing about.Lesley Logan  Yes. So if you are interested in macros coaching you we can go back to several guests, Launa McClung, Giselle Schroer, and Amber Shaw. And they all can tell you how the hell you should count your proteins. (Brad: Yeah.) But, um, but I have a we had Jennifer van Barneveld-Pe on, and she just had a podcast about like, actually, you know, it's, if you don't want people to see weighing your food, you can simply say, I'm working on making sure I'm getting enough nutrients in my system. And I'm doing it for the week to see on average, what I'm doing that doesn't have to be a weird thing. But you can't you can't make sure you're doing that unless you track it for a while. And then you could at this point in my life with certain things, I don't have to do those things. I'm like, I know how much protein is in my my thing here. So I know that stuff. But it is a key thing that we it's very easy ish thing to add in.Brad Crowell  Yeah. (Lesley: So) Yeah. Yeah, it's a it's not quite as complicated as it used to be. So. Okay. Well, (Lesley: Now it's my turn.) What about you?Lesley Logan  Yeah. So, y'all, if you have a cycle, I want you tracking it. So she's developing an app. There are other apps out there. I do know that in the current US climate a lot of people are afraid of doing that. So I am aware of that. However ...Brad Crowell  I think there's actually lawsuits about it right now (Lesley: Yeah.) happening in the US court system (Lesley: Yeah.) about effectively sharing information. Like abortion argument happening here in our country (Lesley: everywhere)Yeah, I'm sure you all know. But basically, the fear is that the apps ...Lesley Logan  Well, they're not HIPAA compliant so they can sell people's information and they already have it.Brad Crowell  If the apps, aren't HIPAA compliant. But either way, even so the fear is still that the police, police enforces, (Lesley: Yeah.) you know, can tap into this information. Anyway, there's a huge court case happening right now, to block them from doing that.Lesley Logan  You don't want to use an app, you can use your own calendar and just, you know, make sure that you you can put like a P on there, you could put like a red heart or something. And then you what I would highly recommend you do is like do that every day of your cycle. And then go back to the first day and have it repeat in 20 days. And if they're a little earlier, a little late, then you can adjust and you should be able to see if you are I'm on a 28 day cycle as I meant while I was we're going to find out what that is now that it's a four day period. Anyway, sorry, I shouldn't be jumping through I just said like we should like love our periods, but I would from eight to four. So you all this is like my life has changed. But do whatever you can do I do use an app, I am unaware if they are protecting the ... or not if they have any protection. I've been emailing them to find out. But but the app is actually out of different country. So I'm not even sure that it is like that a problem that I have to worry about. I like it because it does tell me where what phase I am in. If you're someone where you are beyond a monthly cycle, you are in menopause, please go with the moon cycle and use the moon cycle as your cycle and that will actually help you to know when you are waxing and when you are waning in your hormones. And so there's a lot of research you can do on that. And then ...Brad Crowell  Yeah actually, I just pulled up Jenny's website while you were sharing that and she actually has an entire episode of her podcast dedicated to tracking your menstrual cycle (Lesley: Great.) from April 5th 2022. We will leave the I'll link to her website in the show notes where you can see her blog posts around that and you can listen to her episode as well.Lesley Logan  Yeah and then I also love that she said find a functional medical practitioner near you. This is really helpful she gave actual steps so you can go back and listen to that on how to do it but honestly like just because and I love that she said there's just because there are functional medicine doctors I mean the right one for you and then you can listen back to Jessica Valant episode and our recap episode about finding a doctor that works for you. It is annoying when the first doctor you go to isn't the right doctor. Keep going. (Brad: Yeah.) Keep going there right people out there for you and I love my, we had Dr. Bender on. I love her because I'm like, she's been also following like how my health and stomach will change after I don't have my IUD anymore. And it is insane. Some of the stuff that I was thought was my stomach were not my stomach at all. So it's just you all your body is its own interesting thing and get to know it, like get to know it because that's going to help you be able to listen to it for not just like how you are today with like your health but also like what your what your gut is telling you like your actual gut, not your stomach like your gut instinct is telling you to do in this world, how to act as if you are already the person you want to be because you are it, you just have to step into those shoes. And the more you get to know yourself the easier that's going to be. (Brad: Yeah.) All right. I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell  And, I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan  How are you going to use these tips in your life? We want to know. Tag Jenny Swisher, tag the @be_it_pod. Share this with your friends like seriously share this with your friends. (Brad: Yeah.) One of our agency members Claire Sparrow, she has this thing. I'm gonna have her on one day but she is like women are not telling other women about the stuff that they're going through because it's like this weird like we don't have, we have weird conversation like weird. It's weird. So just share it and then it's not weird like, "Hey, I was just listening to this. Check it out. What do you think?" That's a great conversation starter (Brad: Totally.) and do it. And until next time, Be It till You See It.Brad Crowell  Bye for now.Lesley Logan  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day! 'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli. Lesley Logan  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing. Brad Crowell  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all videos each week so you can. Brad Crowell  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Looking for love but constantly finding yourself in the same repetitive relationships that leave you heartbroken and searching for more? Lauren Zoeller, a Somatic Dating Coach, joins today's conversation to uncover why we find ourselves dating the same people and how to finally discover secure love. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:What is somatic experiencing and how does it play into relationships? The survival response to the loneliness How do you give and receive love & is it keeping you in unhealthy patterns? The energetic vibrational frequency of emotions and how it plays a role in attraction.3 pillars to break the dating cycle: recognizing the dysregulated nervous system patterns, healing the patterns, and manifestation. Understand how you self-sabotage.The peace found in not questioning life changes. BIOLauren Zoeller is a Somatic Relationship Expert, speaker and podcast host. She has achieved overwhelming success in helping high performing, female executives attract a dream relationship and a life they crave. She is the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a cutting edge coaching program that teaches female visionaries how to find aligned love and co-owner of SHIFT with Sanctuary™, an elevated inner circle for the 1% woman who is ready to step into sacred leadership, divine love, energetic longevity and her abundant legacy. Lauren's own story of overcoming deep shame has led her to advocate for women to own their story, use their voice and step into an aligned, vibrant life. She is now the President and CEO of the Balanced Boss Company, LLC, as well as the founder and host of The Aligned Love Podcast. Lauren has been featured in international publications such as Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Total Beauty, Thrive Global, Goalcast, Money Inc., Healthline, Greatist and more.Episode References/Links:Follow Lauren on IGLauren's Website  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.Be It Till You See It Podcast SurveyResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan  Hey, Be It babe. How are you? Oh my goodness. Okay, so I have, she's just an amazing woman for you right now. So a really, really, this is going to be an episode, I really hope you share with all of your female friends, actually, you can share with your men friends, too. You can share with any friend who is you see them struggling to have just amazing conscious love, and be in relationships that you know, fully meet them and support them. And it's an it's mutual. And it's amazing. And you know, it's not not that like everything is about who you're with, because it's not that you have to love yourself. So even if you're like, "I don't want, I'm happily single, I don't want to be with anybody." You have to love you. And there are things that we were taught when we were younger, that really affect how we love ourselves and how we seek out love. And I really like you can't be it till you see it if you don't love yourself or if the love that you're in isn't fully supporting you. You just can't. If you are a married person and your love and life, I still want you to listen because I think there's some amazing things, some reminders, some confidence boosters, you're gonna get some ways to pat yourself on the back. And also, I know you got friends who need to hear this episode. So, I wanted to listen to it so you can give it to them. And then make sure that you're celebrating you. And you're being kind to you this week, I think, I think it'd be really easy to forget all that you've done, all that you do, and all that you are and only see the things that you're not doing things so well and what's not going right. And I just want to remind you that you're doing an amazing job, and you're an awesome, awesome person. And so now, here's Lauren Zoeller.Hey, Be It listener. What is up? I have Lauren Zoeller here and this girl and I had a like a zoom date because of mutual friends that we have both who've been on the show Amber Shaw and Tori Gordon, you have to go listen to their episodes. And it was really funny becuase one those days I was like, "Who is this call?" But I, like, "Who am I talking to today?" And she came on and we hit it off like kismet like friends from like another life. And I had to have her on because what she does in her life and what she does in her business is something that I know every single person actually wants, they want they want, you want to feel loved, you want to feel like you're seen and you're important, and you're heard. And so anyways, I can't wait for you to meet her. And so here she is Lauren, can you tell everyone who you are and what you're up to these days?Lauren Zoeller  I sure can. I'm so excited to be here. So for those of you who are listening and haven't met me, my name is Lauren Zoeller. I am a dating and somatic dating and relationship expert. So I really help women and men find conscious partnership and find a way to actually keep it when they do find it. So I work all with the nervous system and how we have all of these patterns that we have been recreating since childhood and they are stuck in our body. And they actually keep us from finding that sense of deep, deep love that we yearn for. (Lesley: Okay) So that's a little bit what I do.Lesley Logan  Okay, I love all this dating and relationship coach, I think that people are like, yep, understand, you know, got that. The somatic part that you mean, like do a little deep dive into what that is? And then also I can't I really do want to make sure we talk about like the keeping it part because a lot of people are good at getting the date. And it's ... (Lauren: It's like keeping it.) Yeah.Lauren Zoeller  Yeah, yeah. So I am trained in somatic experiencing, which is looking at the nervous system and the way that the nervous system holds on to trauma in the body, and how that trapped trauma keeps us from deep love for ourselves and deep love for others. So somatic experiencing is just, it's therapy of the soma, which is therapy of the body. So so often, we'll go to therapy, and we'll do a lot of cognitive work. So we'll do CBT, we'll do brain spotting, we'll do EMDR. And it's very cognitive, which means you can look at a pattern, or you can look at something toxic. And you can say, I know that this isn't good for me. But your body has a different story. And even though your brain can label something as toxic if your body experienced trauma, which we can talk about trauma and the actual definition of trauma here in just a minute. But if it's if it experiences trauma over an extended period of time, your body goes into a survival pattern. And it will seek out that survival pattern over and over. Even if your brain is saying wait a second, this isn't right. Your nervous system will take over and hijack your brain. So if we're not looking at the body. And if we're not looking at the nervous system, which is what somatic experiencing does. This is why we continue to create patterns. And we don't, we can never find a way out ...Because this is like ... (Lauren: we aren't looking at the body) you keep dating the same person. Yeah. So sorry. You keep dating the same person. (Lauren: Yeah) Like it's like when you're like you keep I know, this is the wrong person, man, just keep doing it. It's like like, and you get frustrated with yourself like you think it's you like there's something wrong with your brain, or there's no one with you. And it's really that you just actually have to release that trauma from the body so that you can experience what your brain knows at once.Exactly, exactly. And I, the example that I give all the time, and most women can relate to this because they've been in this position at one point in their life. It's the man or woman that you know, is so bad for you. Like it's one that you gossip with your girlfriends about. And you're like, "Oh, I know that this person is horrible for me." But yet, it's Friday night, and you're lonely. And you're feeling a little down on yourself. The next thing you know you wake up in their bed Saturday morning. (Lesley and Lauren laughs) Right. (Lesley: Yeah. Yep, did that.) I know. We all did. We all did. And we'll continue to do it if we don't look at the way that the body holds on to that need for someone else to fill that wholeness inside of ourselves. And it comes down to a survival response. It's actually a trauma pattern. So the body but the brain knows it's wrong, that the body hijacks the brain and sends you to his bed because you need that hit. You need that high. Your nervous system needs that high. So,Lesley Logan  Yeah, that's yeah, so fascinating. And took me down memory lane a little bit. So, (Lesley and Lauren laughs) I tell the story because we brought when people asked like, you know, like, how did I meet Brad and it kind of goes back to like this one time that I was sitting on this couch, in this house that was my house with this partner that I was with for five years, and I'm looking at this 80 inch screen TV, 80 inches y'all, it's freaking huge. And the living room was one of those long living rooms. But the way the couch was the TV was on the short side. So like you're like in the screen and it was like 180 degrees of windows in this house. It was like beautiful views, but it's 111 degrees. So you're like a lizard in a terrarium.. So, I'm laying on the towel on a leather couch. It's not mine, looking at an 80 inch stream TV. Watching, He's Just Not That Into You. And I'm like, "I don't think he's that into me." And it was this weird moment. And then I was like, "Am I into him? Like, what are we doing here? What is happening?" And it was weird thing and I, I didn't. So my brain figured it out. And I left but it took, it took a lot of therapy and a lot of stuff to get to where I could like, "Stay away." I had to, I had to, like (Lauren: Yeah) literally go homeless so that I would not live there. Because like, if I live here, I'm gonna end up staying in this relationship.Yeah, yeah. And so in your body is conditioned. Right. And it's, it's used to finding that safety, in that chaos of this person that isn't able to fully commit to you. It's like we our bodies, we call it chaos, and we call it toxic. But it's actually extremely brilliant. It's our body's way of keeping us safe. But it's a false sense of safety. (Lesley: Yeah.) Right. It's not security and it's not, it's not this stable relationship that you're really yearning for. It's this false sense of safety that your body's seeking. But yet, it's not what you actually desire for yourself.Yeah, yeah. So okay, how did you get into doing this? (Lauren and Lesley laughs) Because I feel like that, that's not something that you're like, "When I grow up, I'm gonna, you know, be a somatic coach for relation..." Like you know what I mean, like, that's a lot (Lauren: Yeah) for a five year old. So like, what, what started, what started you on this journey?Lauren Zoeller  Well, to put it nicely, it was my train wreck of a dating history is really what led me here. But it was so much more than that. And I'll give you kind of the cliff notes version. But I had been, I started coaching about eight and a half years ago. And when I made my way into the coaching world, I was working with other coaches and entrepreneurs, helping them build and scale their businesses with heart. I had this, this company, and I do that kind of like weird voice because it was just my pitch line, right. And I had this company and this program called Balanced Boss Academy. And I had The Balanced Boss Podcast, and I had this whole business that was built around how to balance your entrepreneur life with living an actual life, right? And it looked like if you follow me on social media, it looked like I had the best life in the world, like on the outside, looked like I was traveling the world, I had this perfect relationship with this man who was this big to do man in Nashville looked like I had these incredible friends. It looked like had the picture perfect life. And what people didn't understand was that on the inside, I was actually a complete train wreck, complete train wreck. And my breakdown, and my rock bottom moment came. It was one day. And it all happened, like everything came crashing down and in less than 24 hours, and I, it consisted of three phone calls. I woke up on Saturday morning, and the first phone call that I received was from my boyfriend at the time, I had been dating for two years from his mother. She was calling to let me know that he was going to rehab for the sixth time in one year.Lesley Logan  Oh, my God. How ... (Lauren: Yeah ...)how did he have the time or to do that six times?Lauren Zoeller  Right. Right. Right. And everybody thought that we had this perfect relationship and nobody knew. Right? Nobody knew that he was an alcoholic. So it was a whole facade in and of itself. The second call that I received was from my accountant, who told me that we were $30,000 in the red. And he was dropping me as a client because he had no, he was like, "I have no idea. Like your business model isn't sustainable. I have to drop you as a client, because I don't know how you're gonna pay this."Lesley Logan  Oh, my gosh, what a jerk? (Lesley: Right) Could have told you before you're 30,000 in the red.Lauren Zoeller  $10 of the halt, right. So that was call number two, and then call number three and mind you this happened within a 24 hour span. Call number three was from my doctor telling me that I potentially had cancer. They had a biopsy that came back that was cancerous. (Lesley: no) So in a matter of 24 hours, this complete facade that I was trying to uphold, came crashing down. I had no relationship. I had no business really. (Lesley: Yeah) My health was in the shitter (Lesley: Yeah) and I I didn't know what to do. I was like, what? Excuse my language but like, "What the hell? I am a coach. I'm, like, immersed in all this mindset work. And I'm doing all this therapy. And I was positioning myself as this expert that could help people balanced life and work. And I couldn't do it." (Lesley: Yeah.) So I started looking for answers. And I started digging around and really getting real with myself, like, "What is going on? Like, what are these patterns that keep showing up?" And that is when I stumbled into my first somatic session with a somatic therapist. I found somatic therapy, I had a friend that had told me about it. And it was the missing piece for me. So I started to unravel and understand that even though I was just like I spoke about, I was able to recognize that things weren't right in my life. My body was telling me a different story, and I wasn't trained in how to listen to it. (Lesley: Yeah.) So somatic experiencing opened everything for me. And the result, after years of working with it, with a trained somatic therapist, and doing a lot of reparenting work, and a lot of the work that I now lead women through. The result of it was I realigned my business and went from $30,000 in debt to making 30k in one month. I found an aligned partner, who was a dream, who was not addicted to anything, and was secure. (Lauren and Lesley laughs) I realigned my business and helping and serving in a way that truly was in alignment with my heart. And I eliminated the cancer scare, which was pretty amazing.Lesley Logan  That's amazing. I know everyone's like, (Lauren: completely limited ...) "What happened at the quest?"Lauren Zoeller  How, how, yeah, yeah. Like it just, it went away. And then I found amazing, amazing women that just started to kind of fall into my life like you, and Amber, and Tori, and Carrie, and just this really supportive, fantastic group of women and friends that are everything that I always wanted, I really stepped into alignment. So it was the missing piece for me.Lesley Logan  So, thank you for sharing that whole story because I think that people go, "Oh, she went from a coach to being a somatic coach, there's just a certification." And like, really, like, all and also, so many people are like, "Oh, my God, I'm so sorry, that happened to you." And it's probably and you're probably like, I don't know, for me, I'm like, I'm so happy that happened to you. Because like, (Lauren: Yeah) you wouldn't be who you are right now, you wouldn't ... Like if only you lost was just the boyfriend, you probably would still be doing what you were doing. You know, like, if all your or if all you had was like just the debt, you probably would have kept the other two things like you or you wouldn't have put the things all together like it all had to come crashing down for you to actually go, "What am I going to do here?"Lauren Zoeller  Yeah, yeah. Well, because, and I think that this happens often with people when they get into the coaching business. It's like, "I want to be a coach." But they haven't really overcome a lot of what they need to overcome in order to properly coach someone through what they're going through. And so I really had a wake up call, I think you're absolutely right, I had to go through that complete rock bottom because I would have kept doing mindset work. I would have kept going to talk therapy, I would have just kept doing what everybody says to do. (Lesley: Yeah) But it wasn't getting me anywhere. So it's like it all had to come crashing down in order for that to realign.Lesley Logan  Yeah, and I, you know, like, if you're listening to this, and you're feeling like you're at your rock bottom, like I'm not like, I'm not like, I'm not saying I'm like, "Whoa, go you." But I am. But I think if you can accept that, and you look around you instead of going why is this happening? Like so if you're like, this has all happened to me, well is me. It's like, why is this happening? Like, go on that curious journey and, and try to figure it out. You, I mean, I didn't have a cancer scare. But I definitely like left the ex. And so I was homeless. And then a month later, I'm back to the house to pick up something. And when I was leaving, I totaled my car. (Lauren: Oh) So, I like head on collision. I had to call him to get me to the hospital, like all this stuff. And then I found out a week later the place that I rented space closed and I had no place to take my clients, which is like where a majority of my income came. And I was just like, "Okay, well, where are we going to live? And what are we going to drive and where are we going to work?" And all of it led me to like really figuring out like, what are like what are like, like, this is a fuck yes. This is what we're doing. (Lauren: Yeah) Ditch like, I'm not doing lukewarm things anymore. And so yeah, I think like, I am so grateful for that moment for me. And so when I hear about people, I see the other side. It's like that was like the best thing could have happened for you, you know. So okay because someone heard at the beginning when you're like and stay in these relationships. So what what is it about like, what is the thing where we can get into them, but then we can't always keep them and should we want to keep all of them like what's how do we decipher that too maybe that's like 17 questions, butLauren Zoeller  Yeah, well, it depends, right? It depends on what the dynamic was that you learned, either in past relationships or as a child in how you give and receive and hold onto love. Right. So I'm just going to give you kind of a high level example. If you were raised in chaos, as a child, if you had helicopter parents who were in and out, like, sometimes they were there, sometimes they weren't. Sometimes they showed you affection and love. Other times, they were just mad at you, because they were having a bad day. Right. And you have this inconsistency and emotional availability, then what we usually see is that as an adult, if chaos isn't present, if there's not fighting are really high highs and really low lows. You feel bored. You feel like relationship, like the relationship doesn't have any quote unquote, "passion." But it's only because and I say this all the time that children raised in chaos, are triggered by peace and safety. Right. So this is one example. There's so many different ways that trauma (Lesley: Yeah) can show up and recreate itself, right. But most of the time, the reason people can't hold on to secure love is because they feel like it lacks passion, or it's boring, and nine times out of 10, that's because you experienced chaos and your nervous system in printed that love equals chaos. And so when that chaos isn't present, your nervous system is used to that, to that chaos. And so you feel like it's boring, when in essence, it's actually not boring. It's just that you are used to chaos. So you run from relationship to relationships, and you can feel that high (Lesley: Yeah) all the time. Right.Lesley Logan  This is, this is so fascinating. I can think of like 17 friends on my whole life that like, I'm like, "Oh, that person needs to hear this. And this person needs hear this. My mom. Hi, mom." (Lesley laughs) And so um, so that's, that's amazing. Because what you're what you're saying as a coach is like, it's not just about us helping you find... And I think this is like relationship coaches that like find people to mate like I when I taught in LA and I had these in person clients, they were like, getting out of these dating coaches are those you know, I don't know what it's called anymore, but like just lunch and like then other people (Lauren: Yeah) like, set you up for the dates (Lauren: matchmakers ...) matchmakers that's it. (Lauren: Yeah.) But they're like, they're not able to actually help you keep the relationship going. And so what you're able to do is like, let's figure out what's going on inside of you. Let's unravel that, so that you can actually keep the person that you really did fall in love with for reals, that you're just (Lauren: Yeah) sabotaging not like on purpose, but because of what your patterns are that are imprinted in you. Lauren Zoeller  Exactly, exactly. And there's, and I don't usually get to this until I've worked with someone for a while. But if you follow Dr. Bruce Lipton, he talks all about energetic vibrational frequency of emotions. If you're living in a heightened trauma response for an extended period of time, chances are you're living in shame, anger, guilt, fear, which are lower vibrational frequency emotions, which means that if you've never looked at your childhood patterns and the way that you love and were taught how to give and receive love, and then there's a lot of shame and guilt, and fear and anger and sadness around the way that you receive love. If we look at Dr. Bruce Lipton's work, he says that every emotion has an energetic vibrational frequency associated with that. So, and this goes, this is kind of like leading into manifestation a little bit and (Lesley: Yeah) attraction a little bit. If you're not looking at those patterns, and you're not actively doing the work to understand them and heal them, then you're going to be vibrating at that energetic vibrational frequency, which means you're going to be attracting people who have your same wounds. Right. So if we just take away even all the patterns, and dissecting the patterns, and we just look at the emotions of associated with some of these trauma instances in our body, of course, you're not going to find secure love because you're vibrating at that state. And that's what you're going to attract because like, attracts like. (Lesley: Yeah) Right. So you got to be able to do the work so that you can also shift the way that you call people into your life, which is kind of a missing piece a lot of people don't talk about.Lesley Logan  Yeah, so you brought up manifestation and I think a lot of people go, "Oh, manifestation. Yeah, I thought about it. I wrote it down. I did the secret like you know, I put it in the universe." But I, I think that manifestation also can... can also, you can also manifest and also take some action and there can be, it can be a little bit more than this amorphous thing that we do. How does that work in your your work and how does that work in like relationships and attracting and bringing in the person that we want to have?Lauren Zoeller  Yeah. So I'm a firm believer that man... manifestation work, okay, an I want to put this because it's so, so deep. I teach manifestation work and I teach attraction work at the end of working with someone. It's actually the third pillar of my program and what I lead women through. The reason being is because in the first pillar, we understand your patterns. So we get really clear what are your patterns, we go back through your past relationship patterns, what I call your core stories of limitation, which are your trauma moments, your childhood and generational dynamics, it really clear on the dysregulated nervous system patterns that are present for you. And the second pillar, we heal them we go through a lot of somatic experiencing to shift your nervous system. The reason that I don't go over manifestation and attraction until the end is because if you are manifesting and you're putting out into the world what you want, and you're just letting it be, but you don't actually truly believe at your core level that you are worthy of receiving what you've asked for. You will sabotage what it is that you want. (Lesley: Hmm) That that sabotaging comes from your patterns. Right. (Lesley: Right.) So it's like if you haven't done that work, the re parenting work to understand how you self sabotage or how your nervous system is dysregulated it doesn't matter how many things we put out into the universe, you're gonna hijack those bad boys.Lesley Logan  Right. So it's possible that people are out there manifesting and then sabotaging every time the universe is like, "Here's the thing you wanted. Here's the thing that you wanted." (Lesley laughs)Lauren Zoeller  Yeah. Yeah. And, and you see that cycle of at least it was for me, like, you may manifest it, but it may go away as soon as it shows up. Right? You can't hold on to it, which is the same thing with love.Lesley Logan  Yeah. Oh, my goodness, it's so fascinating how all of this kind of works together. Because I feel like what you do, even if someone listen to this, it's like, "I've got the man I'm with or the person I'm with. The human I want to be with." But the other stuff isn't there. Like, it's like, okay, somehow you made that work. And we still have work to do (Lauren: Yeah) on these other areas. I feel like, I feel like, I don't know, maybe our life's work is just getting to know ourselves and re parenting. And then, and then trying to do the best we can with all of that information. So Lauren, you, you now have someone that like, great relationship, you're loving it, you're doing this job. How, you know, what were the was there any hesitancy when you're switching careers? And you're like, "Okay, this is what I'm going to do now?" Because I don't know, maybe it's just me and what I'm thinking but like, I always go, "What if like, but I failed at this. And so I won't be good." You know what I mean? Like the history of it, like kind of cloud what you think is your potential? Was it easy for you to make the switch? Was it hard for you? How did you like do that without holding yourself back?Lauren Zoeller  I would say that I switched. I mean, if we go back back, like before I even started coaching, I owned a yoga studio. And like I've had all I feel like I've had all these different lives prior to where I am now, which is crazy. And up until this shift, like up until really diving into and understanding somatic work, and stepping into dating and relationships. I was always hesitant. I was like, "Ah, I don't know if this is gonna work." Like the thing before it failed. And the thing before it failed and everything else failed. I always had this hesitancy and I will say this and I truly mean this from the bottom of my heart. Since doing this deeper somatic work and really understanding my worth and knowing me really deeply. I've never questioned it. It's the first time that I've never questioned it. It's just felt so right. And that doesn't mean that it's it hasn't shifted and changed and things haven't fallen apart and rebuilt themselves. But there's always just this deep knowing that I'm exactly where I need to be which has never been present before.Lesley Logan  That I totally understand. I totally because I think and maybe hesitancy isn't what I felt but like I felt like, "Who am I to do it?" I had questions like, "Is it gonna work? What if it doesn't work?" Like there's all these things and then and then I would kind of do it anyways but always holding myself back and playing smaller I think than I should like if (Lauren: Yeah) I look back they all worked out because it was supposed to but like I, I was like waiting for the like someone to deem it fine, you know ... (Lauren: Yeah) like say and you're you're doing a great job and you're doing a great job. And it wasn't until like my little my own rock bottom moment that I didn't question the apartment I chose. I didn't question like, this is where I'm gonna have my my clients. I didn't question when I met Brad. I was like, "I'm gonna married that man." He didn't have my phone number y'all and also was still married, so. But I was like, "No, we're gonna be married someday. I'll wait till he's ready." And I didn't question our move to Las Vegas either like those things. And so now when I questioned things, I'm like, "Why am I questioning this thing? What is what is it about this thing that I'm questioning?" Versus ... Do you know what I mean? Like, it's like a different (Lauren: Yeah) way of looking at it. It's more of a sign like, (Lauren: Yeah) what is this over here? Why are we looking at it as a distraction? Like, what is or do I have work to do? So thank you for sharing that because I, I think a lot of people listening to this, probably have done the same thing and all of this stuff. And then when they don't question it, they also are kind of like, well, then that's almost like, too, it's almost too easy. Like, (Lauren: Yeah) it should be harder than that. (Lauren: Yeah) There's a negotiation process I have to do. So (Lauren: Yeah) what so now you've made the switch. You're doing this, I know, you're in the process of moving and everything to what is it that you are kind of being it till you see it right now? Like, where are you going with, like, what's your next thing that you're trying to grow into?Lauren Zoeller  So I truly my life's work is to get this work into as many people's hands as possible. Truly, I want everyone to be able to experience deep, deep love from the space of a balanced nervous system from security. So, I am in the process now of writing a book. So my book will hopefully be out by this time next year, which is really exciting.Lesley Logan  Oh, my God, you're writing a book? Yes. Yes. This is amazing.Lauren Zoeller  Yes, yeah. So I'm very excited about that. And just continuing to spread the message. I have a program called The Aligned Love Collective that has been going strong now for almost two years. And we enroll 20 to 30 women in it every month. And it's changing lives. So it's just a matter of getting this message to more people and getting the book out and doing some speaking.Lesley Logan  Have you ever written a book before? Is this your first book? (Lauren: My first book.) That's amazing. I want to go back to the first book because I didn't know what I didn't know. And now I know. (Lesley an Lauren laughs) And now I know.Lauren Zoeller  That's what I hear from everybody.Lesley Logan  Yeah, yeah. Oh, my gosh, we'll have to have you back when the book is done. We'll have to talk about the whole process and, and just let people know when it's out. Okay, we're gonna take a quick little break. We're gonna edit that out everyone. I don't know how this dog got in here. It's like he was he was called in. Yeah, he called it okay. We're gonna take a quick break, and then we're going to find out how you can hear about do your course and follow your podcasts in just a second.All right, Lauren, where can people find you, follow you, do the work with you? What do you got?Lauren Zoeller  So you can go to my website, laurenzoeller.com. I'm also most active on Instagram and TikTok. So you can follow me on Instagram at @laurenzoeller and on TikTok at @coachlaurenzoeller. And it'll give you if you go to the website and visit the Instagram will give you everything that you need ...Lesley Logan  Amazing. Amazing. Okay, we asked everybody how some BE IT tips. So bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action steps they can take to be until they see it. So what do you have for us?Lauren Zoeller  So I my first tip would be if deep committed partnership is what you want to find. And I'm just giving this to you from a dating and relationship side of things. Look at the patterns that have shown up in your relationships and write them down. Why has every relationship ended? What is the common thread? And then go back and answer this question. How was I taught to give and receive love as a child? That's the first question. Second question is, what version of myself did I create to receive love from my parents? And use these two questions and compare them against the relationship patterns that you have found out and he will know so much about how you show up in relationships and use that as your jumping point to start to go deeper into yourself about what may need to shift and what may need to heal so that you can have deeper partnership.Lesley Logan  Oh, oh, I love this so much. I can't wait to hear what people discover. So you all how are you going to use these tips in your life? Lauren and I want to know. So screenshot this episode, tag us on Instagram and TikTok. I'm also on there. I'm being it until I see it on TikTok. That's where we're like that's my be at moment right now. I'm like, "I'm just gonna figure this out this elder millennial is showing up." (Lauren: I love it.) So how are you use this tag us, share it on on Instagram and wherever else you do so that other people can hear this especially if you are listening to this and you're like just love us and you're like happily married. Send this to your single friends that you are like so tired of the patterns that they're going through. If you truly love them you want them to have love like you do, then you send them this episode. You can just text it to them that way. It's going to be great. So thank you so much and until next time, Be It Till You See It.That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day! 'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'. Brad Crowell  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli. Lesley Logan  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.Brad Crowell  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all videos each week so you can. Brad Crowell  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

One of the biggest mental health stigmas in the world is around eating disorders. And I will be the first one to tell you that I recognize how touchy of a subject it is. Many of us go through these crash diets, yo-yo diets, these crazy 30-day challenges and transformations, quote-unquote, that are supposed to help us and make us feel better about who we are. In my own journey, as many of you know, at one point in my life, I was 350 pounds; there is no question that morbid obesity comes from an eating disorder. And for me, it was very much tied to emotional behaviors and escapism, and for many people, that holds true. And today's guest, Amber Shaw, is a body transformation expert and the founder of the wellness revolution. She's a motivational speaker and internationally recognized authority in the health and wellness industry. She's a great friend of mine who has been on quite the journey herself as someone who has battled eating disorders and this wellness industry, which is changing it. I have so much love and admiration for Amber. We often think our body is the full representation of who we are in the world. And Amber Shaw is someone I will tell you right now will agree that that's not entirely true. If you've ever been on the yo-yo diets, if you've ever had an eating disorder, if you have low self-esteem, you find yourself binge eating, you're kind of like in this weird place where food often kind of satiates your needs, your desires, your wants and your needs, and yet you always still feel empty, you may wanna listen to this episode. I know that in my own journey, when I got healthy, chose health, and started looking at food as nourishment and medicine, everything changed for me. And I hope you'll find it will do the same for you. And look, I'll tell you right now; this episode is not preachy, it's not as yelling about this is the diet or that is the thing, but I'm going to tell you right now, there are tools in this conversation that if you pay attention, could potentially change your life forever. Learn More About Amber Shaw at: https://ambershaw.com/ Learn more about Think Unbroken and Pre-Order my new book: Unbroken Man. Plus, learn more about the free coaching and other mental health programs. Click here: https://linktr.ee/michaelunbroken

One of the biggest mental health stigmas in the world is around eating disorders. And I will be the first one to tell you that I recognize how touchy of a subject it is. Many of us go through these crash diets, yo-yo diets, these crazy 30-day challenges and transformations, quote-unquote, that are supposed to help us and make us feel better about who we are. In my own journey, as many of you know, at one point in my life, I was 350 pounds; there is no question that morbid obesity comes from an eating disorder. And for me, it was very much tied to emotional behaviors and escapism, and for many people, that holds true. And today's guest, Amber Shaw, is a body transformation expert and the founder of the wellness revolution. She's a motivational speaker and internationally recognized authority in the health and wellness industry. She's a great friend of mine who has been on quite the journey herself as someone who has battled eating disorders and this wellness industry, which is changing it. I have so much love and admiration for Amber. We often think our body is the full representation of who we are in the world. And Amber Shaw is someone I will tell you right now will agree that that's not entirely true. If you've ever been on the yo-yo diets, if you've ever had an eating disorder, if you have low self-esteem, you find yourself binge eating, you're kind of like in this weird place where food often kind of satiates your needs, your desires, your wants and your needs, and yet you always still feel empty, you may wanna listen to this episode. I know that in my own journey, when I got healthy, chose health, and started looking at food as nourishment and medicine, everything changed for me. And I hope you'll find it will do the same for you. And look, I'll tell you right now; this episode is not preachy, it's not as yelling about this is the diet or that is the thing, but I'm going to tell you right now, there are tools in this conversation that if you pay attention, could potentially change your life forever. Learn More About Amber Shaw at: Learn more about Think Unbroken and Pre-Order my new book: Unbroken Man. Plus, learn more about the free coaching and other mental health programs. Click here:

Finishing up our conversation with Amber Shaw we talk about how she became an influencer and jump into the reality that women have taken on more roles in the workforce and home life and the dynamics of that effect. Women are leading in a lot of categories from education to entrepreneurship.  The view that Amber gets to witness of how this all affects our brains should not be overlooked. Lifestyle upgrade is key. For more resources check us out Amber Shwa - IG MSAmberShaw, TikTok MsAmberShaw Doug Mapp - Twitter @dmapp2 Follow Us for Nuggets IG The Brain Prophets, Twitter @brain_prophets www.thinkupexecellence.com 

Are you a serial dieter? Amber Shaw sit's down with us to talk about how she battled with Bulumia, how she reframed how she thought about dieting, and now helps women over 40 deal with dieting and body shame issues in life. 

Kristin chats with Gold Coast client, Amber Shaw about her postpartum recovery. She shares the challenges she faced and the discusses how she advocated for her needs.

Stop complaining and start changing. From personal experiences and over coming extreme trauma, join this conversation with Michael Unbroken to learn how to stop living with regrets.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:The impact of past experiences and the theft of identity. The process of evolving to the person you want to be Building confidence through uncomfortability is self careComplaining isn't changing anythingBe honest and understand yourself to step through the fireAgree only to the things that align The fixed vs abundance mindsetTEAM - Time, Effort, Energy, Money,How bad do you want your dream life? Episode References/Links:WebsiteIGGuest Bio:From homeless to hero, Michael Unbroken, is the Founder of Think Unbroken, best-selling author, award-winning speaker, podcast host, coach, and advocate for adult survivors of childhood trauma.At 4 years old Michael's emotionally incestuous mother cut off his right index finger, she was a drug addict and alcoholic. At 6 his hyper-abusive step-father beat and hospitalized him.At 7 he was molested by a den mother in the Mormon Church.From 8-12 he was often homeless and in deep poverty and did what it took to survive from stealing food and only bathing at school.He got high for the first time at 12 and drunk at 13. By 15 he was expelled from school for selling drugs.At 18 he found himself deep in The Vortex and began chasing money to solve his problems.By 25 Michael was 350 pounds, smoking two packs a day, drinking himself to sleep, and attempted suicide for the second time. Then he had his mirror moment and decided to stop being a victim of trauma and to be the HERO of his own Story! Since 2016, Michael has empowered over 100,000 trauma survivors to get out of The Vortex, learn to love themselves, and become the hero of their own story. Michael has written multiple books including the best seller Think Unbroken: Understanding and Overcoming Childhood Trauma, spoken in over 80 countries, won investments from Undercover Billionaire Grant Cardone, and is on a mission to end Generational Trauma in his lifetime.  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Hey, Be It listeners, get ready. This guest, well, brutal honesty is exactly what you're gonna get. And I am freaking stoked for you. I am so grateful that Michael Unbroken said "yes" to come in on this podcast. And I really need you to hear this, I really, really do. So if you're listening to this podcast while you're doing other things, you're gonna want to save this and re listen and you're gonna listen again and again and again. And I really, truly hope that you listen to the BE IT action item at the end with a journal in hand. Or go for a walk outside without your airpods in, go outside, but your feet in the ground and like answer the question, really, really answer it, and maybe have to answer it again tomorrow. And again, the next day, and then again, the next day, and if nothing is coming down. If you're like, "Lesley, I'm stuck." I'm gonna say, "Do it again, again. Do it again, again. Do it again and again and again." And the reason is, is we like to tell ourselves a lot of stories. We get in our own way. And yeah, there's obstacles and yeah, there's tough shit. But we get in our way more than anything else. And so I'm not gonna keep going because I cannot wait for you to hear the words of Michael Unbroken. So after this message, here he is.Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Hey, Be It listeners I have an awesome guest today. I'm actually really excited. We're going to leave fully inspired and ready to take on each and every day because we have Michael Unbroken here. And I have to say I listened to him on my friend Amber Shaw's podcast - Wellness Revolution, and I was fired up. And there was also some moments was like, "ooh, I want to talk about this more" because I love the way you think. I can't wait to dive in. And I also know so many people like, "But wait, what about this? But wait, what about this?" So Michael, welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast. Can you tell everyone who you are and what you're all about these days?Michael Unbroken 2:38  Yeah, well, thank you for being here. It's an honor. And I am me. That's who I am. And, you know, my my thing is I work with adult survivors of childhood trauma. I'm an author, speaker, coach, podcast host do a little bit here, do a little bit there. But ultimately, my mission is to end generational trauma in my lifetime, through education and information, so that another kid doesn't have a story like mine.Lesley Logan 3:05  Well, thank you for the work that you do. And also, I think there's a few questions people will have, which is just like on how did you get into this work? And what maybe even like, what are the effects? Like what do you see in kids when you see this generational trauma happening?Michael Unbroken 3:22  Yeah, well, I mean, this is my life, you know what I'm saying? So, I got into this, because I was like, on my own journey, just trying to get my shit together, you know, after about 6000 rock bottoms. And one day, someone was just like, "Hey, man, when you coach me," and I was like, "Fuck, no." I have no idea what I'm doing. I barely know what I'm doing with my own life, I can't help you. And they were persistent. And I was like, "Alright, cool. Well, it's X amount of money, let's go for it." And that was six years ago and thousands of people later. And you know, the thing about this journey, as I mean, you know, you look at the fact that from just a statistical standpoint, and I would argue this number is actually too low. 83% of adults in America have experienced the adverse childhood experience. And I would say it's probably realistically 95% if not more, if you consider non reports and homes like mine, where if you talk about it, you're gonna get fucked up worse than if you didn't. And, you know, it's one of those things where I believe that unfortunately, because we live in a society of unhealed people, and you've heard the adage, hurt people, hurt people, you get a continuation of that. And so you see it everywhere all the time. You know, people always talk about trauma is this thing about this mental health aspect and they're right, except they're missing a piece of the puzzle. Like for me growing up, like my mother cut my finger off when I was four years old, she was drug addict and alcoholic. I was homeless as a kid. I lived by myself for months at a time. I stole food to survive, didn't graduate high school, my three childhood best friends got murdered, like I can go on and on and on. But that's still not even the thing. (Lesley: Yeah) The thing is the theft of our identity was stolen from us. And so you see all these people trying to live life, but they've never had been allotted of the space to be them before. You know, because growing up, you think about this, like, what's the brain's purpose, survival? (Lesley: Yeah) You doesn't give a shit about your shirt, doesn't care about your goals? Nothing. It's like, "What do I need to take from the stimulus of this environment to differentiate safety versus danger so that I can keep my ass long alive long enough to procreate?" That's it. And so when you recognize that as an autonomic response, your brain says, "Wait, all right, when I'm a child, and I try to be me, it's unsafe. So because I need to survive, I'm going to stop being me." That becomes the real thief of (Lesley: Yeah) identity. And that leads you to this place where you're an adult, you have no idea who you are.Lesley Logan 5:56  Yeah, and I think like, thank you for sharing that. And also, so many people can be listening to this and going, "I don't know who I am." And they might even be caught up that they didn't have a childhood, as tramatic as yours. But I think you're correct. So many unhealed people parenting, there's a difference like it... it's okay, if you don't know who you are, and your childhood wasn't as tramatic. It's still you still don't know who you are. And you still have to figure that out. You know, and I think a lot of people might even hear this and even think, like, "Oh, I didn't have it that bad. So I just, it's gonna be fine. I'll just, I'll just keep doing it the way I'm doing it." But you're on this mission to make sure that everybody is living the best life that they have that everyone is being themselves, right?Michael Unbroken 6:38  Well, and look, I'll say this, like people will say that all the time. And it's funny if like, when people come into coaching with me, I'll be like, "So what's your point? Like, this isn't a competition. I don't live for you. I don't breathe for you. I don't love for you. I don't get up and go to work for you and build your life and raise your kids and have intimacy for you. I don't do that for you. So what does that have, what does my story have to do with you? Nothing." (Lesley: Yeah) You know and so the thing here is like, people have to realize like, that comparison game that we play as a cop out. Somebody had it worse than you, somebody had it worse than me, somebody's eating filet mignon on a yacht right now. What does that have to do with me? Nothing. And so the thing about this journey is, you've got to be willing to come to this place in your life, where you just simply first and foremost, just acknowledge, like, something's wrong. Like, I'm not living life into the potential that I have, then you recognize something very important that people miss out on and that's causation and correlation. See, we're the sum total of all of our experiences leading up to this moment. That means every single thing that's ever happened to us matters, it impacts as it does, whether you like it or not, you know, think about this, you're in third grade, your miss, miss class, and you're like, sitting there, coloring a house, and you make the sun, purple. She comes up to you and put her put their hand on your shoulder, she goes, "You know, Lesley, the moons and the sun are not purple." And you're like chastised in front of the class, you're embarrassed, they all hear it, they laugh, your brain goes, "Oh, wait, that was super dangerous. I don't ever want to be me again." Right? And so that's this game is like recognizing that there is a reason behind all the actions that we have, and all the behaviors of our life, and having the willingness to recognize the truth, that the only way that changes is you have to foundationally and fundamentally challenge the belief and narrative that you have of who it is that you think you are, because you actually don't know. And in that process, being willing to step through, honestly, the hell in the struggle of self discovery, because that's the only way it changes.Lesley Logan 8:46  Yeah, cuz it is the hell of the self discovery it is, it isn't the easiest thing you could do. Otherwise, everybody would have done it already. It's almost easier to not be yourself to go through and play the comparison game, even though it's painful. It's easier because you don't have to go through the depths and figure out like, when were the spots? Who are the people? Relive those experiences. So, you know, for yourself and for you, do you coach people with this? Like, what is what is that first step? Is it just recognizing that you're, you're not who you want to be?Michael Unbroken 9:19  Yeah, 100% and acknowledging it and being okay with it and giving yourself some grace and compassion, and people will hear my voice and they're like, "Oh, this guy's super intense." Yes, that is correct. But I'm also very kind. I'm very compassionate. I'm very patient. The truth is like, you have to kick your own ass at points and times in this journey. And I think we're, we're so unbelievably afraid of doing that, because everyone only tells self care. And I'm like, "Don't you realize that the greatest form of self care is in the moment of struggle by doing the thing that you know, you need to do to make your life better?" Journaling ain't gonna fix your problem. You know, yes. Do I do I subscribe that? Do I do it for myself? Of course I do. And meditation and yoga and working out and name it, I do it, I swear to you this is true. But in the true moments of growth, you must be willing to nakedly look at your life and go, "I'm not doing as well as I could, because of the choices and decisions I'm making," while simultaneously reconciling the fact that you've been set up for failure, and that the only way that you're going to overcome this is to build confidence. And the only way to actually build confidence is to consistently do incredibly, uncomfortable things.Lesley Logan 10:34  Yeah, that is, so that's the number one question I get all the time, "How do you create confidence?" And I believe it is consistency. And I want to go back, because you mentioned going to the gym, and you mentioned like the hard things and self care, we do think of it as like, "Oh, massages, journaling," you know, maybe some other things in there. But even the way you built like when we build muscle, where we're stressing the muscle or breaking it down to build it stronger. And so that, to me, is really important because going back to what do you say like, you have to like go through the hell the depths of it, figuring out who you are. All that pressure, there's good pressure, too, there's good stress, too. And I think we tend to go, "Oh, if I need to take care of myself, I have to avoid all of that." But there's a balance in there that we have to maintain.Michael Unbroken 11:20  I am such a proponent of forcing yourself into discomfort. I mean, and I practice what I preach, you know, it's from getting up early to training for marathons, and doing CrossFit to sitting in silence, like that is so fucking uncomfortable. Just sit there and discover the truth about who you are. And in that, you will build that muscle, you will create a sustainable ecosystem to survive in. But you've got to be willing to push yourself there. And, you know, I wish there was an easy solution for this that didn't involve like this moment of, like, honestly, like figuring out who you are through the pain. But but it's true because when my life, I'll paint you a picture, when my life was me, not addressing the reality of my potential. I was 350 pounds, smoking two packs a day, drinking myself to sleep, cheating on my girlfriend, making six figures and 50 grand in debt. (Lesley: Hmm) Life was easy. And we think about that, it's like, "Alright, cool. What do you want? Who do you want to be create yourself?" And in that it's about you have to be willing to look at the bullshit that you sell yourself as truth. (Lesley: Yeah) And that's hard. Like, it's hard because we want to avoid it because it's, it's uncomfortable. It should be because look, and I'm gonna say this, and people need to hear what I'm about to say. You're not good enough to be the person that you're capable of being yet. And the only way that you're going to get there is by making a decision of who it is that you want to be, and diving in, like, figure out who you are, and commit to it. Because on a long enough timeline, you will become that person. 11 years later, from the moment I went and looked in the mirror and asked myself, "What are you willing to do, I'm here speaking to you? (Lesley: Yeah) And I'm still not even remotely close to the person that I want it to be because I haven't learned the right skills, met the right people, went to the right courses, read the right books. And it is a progression, just like building that muscle because I know who I want to be in 37 years, and I'm not good enough to be that person yet.Lesley Logan 13:45  Right? Because it's a I think we easily think, "Okay, what do I have to do to get there and then I'm there. And then I'm there." But there isn't a there there. It sounds like it's right. It's like, this is what you want to be and you're working towards it, in 11 years, and like, look where you are. And yet there's still more to get you there. And it's not a perfectionist thing. It's a constant discovery and a challenge thing and a perfectionist thing is like, "Okay, now that I've got the outfit and now that I've got the job and now that I'm doing the journaling, and now I'm going to the gym and so now I'm there." And so I think that's you know, yet is such a powerful word that we don't often remember to put on the end of a sentence. The the question I know that listeners are having is, "Okay, so I'm wanting to work on myself. I want to actually get to know who I want to be. And that yet I've got this partner, these kids, this job." Obviously, I mean, like is it that they let it all go? Is it that they try to like see who they become and what stays, stays? Like where what happens when you're in the middle of a life that isn't the life you want? Where do you go?Michael Unbroken 14:52  When are you never in the middle of life? You're always in life, this is it, this is the game. Right? So here's what I think about two things come to mind. There's so much context. And even with your question, it's still quite vague. And there's so much context in this, right? Because the thing that you have to take into consideration is, everybody has something different going on. But the one thing we all have in common is the ability to make decisions about what we want in our life, (Lesley: Yeah) and to recognize the cold, hard truth, that at any single moment in which you are negotiating with yourself about what you want, you are going to die with regret. And that is the thing that people get trapped in, because they're like, "Oh, but I have the job. And I have the relationship. And I have the lease." Do you how many times I've heard somebody say, "I want to travel the world." And I'm like, "Cool. I've done it, too. I've lived in 12 countries, let's go." And they're like, "Oh, but I have a lease." And? Keep making excuses and keep watching your life not be different. You know, you want to change, I want to change, do you want to change? (Lesley: Yeah, yeah, yeah) I want to change. I don't want to be this me tomorrow. That's not the point of this. I want to evolve, evolve and evaluate where I'm at, and do what it takes to go to where I want to be. Jay Z has one of my favorite quotes of all time, says, "People around you saying that you changed. Why didn't do all this work to stay the same." You've got to recognize as you're in this journey. You shouldn't be changing. You shouldn't be different than where you are. And the truth is, some people are going to come with you and some aren't. There are seasons here, right? (Lesley: Yeah) So people are here for a season. Some are... Now I definitely don't want you to abandon your kids, right? No, I think that's chaotic. And then they end up getting coached by me, it's not the greatest deal. (Lesley laughs) But but what I will say is like, "Is your partner bringing value to your life? Is that career that you spent 20 years on fulfilling you were making you want to contemplate shooting yourself?" Like this real talk shit, right? And you've got to get really, really clear about what you want. And be brutally honest with yourself. The one thing that I know to be true about anyone that I've ever coached that has seen success come through these programs is massive honesty.Lesley Logan 17:07  Yeah. (Michael: massive) And honesty, I think and that's where a lot of people get stuck is that massive honesty. Because there's a story they've told themselves so much that it feels true. Yeah. So something that I know you, you do is they know a lot. Like you love boundaries, you say no, you don't do things you don't want to do. Was that easy for you to do? Or like, did you also struggle with that too, because I, I am a big fan of boundaries. I love them. It's not really hard for me. However, something I hear a lot from our listeners, it's really hard for them to say no, it's hard for them to back out of plans they've made it. They don't want to let people down. What do you got for them?Michael Unbroken 17:49  Yeah, well, I mean, look, keep complaining, not changing things. And nothing's going to be different. Like, I know, that's hard. And so you're in this position in your life where like, I'll give you a perfect example. Like if you invited me, let's say you called me like, "Hey, man, you want to go to see Travis Tritt? I'd be like, "He's country, right?" You'd like, "Yeah, he's great." I'm like, "Hell no." Why? Because think about this growing up. Well, let's create some real context because I want to give people something a foundational understanding. We learn to bend who we are for safety. Right? Going back to what we were talking about earlier, this there's causation here. One of the things that I discovered very young, and I knew I was actually cognizant of this as a kid, is that I would do whatever it took to fit in. I'd listen to the music you like, go to the classes, you wanted to go to, dress like you. I used to have kids call me out like, "You're a copycat." I'm like, "I know, because I don't know how to be me. So I'm a chameleon." And what happens is, you recognize that, eventually, that doesn't serve you. And you're in this position where you have no idea who you are. And so now you have to challenge that. And I believe that the greatest form of challenging the understanding of who you are, is by learning to say "yes and no," based on your wants, needs, interests, values, moral character, and boundaries. And so when I think about this, you know, at 26 years old, I had this really pivotal change and shift in my life. And in that the next three years, were the most incredibly difficult years of my life way more than anything else, because these were the beginning of this year as of self discovery. And so it was me doing a whole bunch of different things to figure out, "Is this who I am?" Then in that the thing that I want folks who are listening to take away is the only way you're going to discover who you are is by discovering who you are. And so that means when your gut is like, "Yo, I don't want to do that say "no'." And when you're like, "Yes, I absolutely want to showing up and going through with it," even if it's scary and uncomfortable, you know, there's something to be sad about that moment in which you chase your dreams as an adult. Like (Lesley: Yeah) our imagination is stripped so way not only through abuse, if that's the case for you, but hell just living in a society that says, "Don't chase your dreams, but watch everyone else has theirs." And you see the change makers in the world, they're the ones who are willing to step through the fire anyway. (Lesley: Yeah) Like, like, I think about that moment in which you're at the precipice of walking through the doorway, right? Think about this, you know, this person, you've probably had this experience yourself, where you like, you pack the thing that you needed, you got in the car, you drove there, you're outside of the building, you're gonna go and do that thing, whatever that thing is, it doesn't matter. And then that moment, you make a decision, that's where life happens. And so for me, I only and when people understand this, it will change your life. And this is not hubris. I'm not being crass. I literally mean this, I only do what I want to do. And I never do what I don't want to do. Now that's framed through my values, my moral character, my wants, needs, interest and boundaries. So if you hit me up, and you're like, "Hey, I heard you in Amber Shaw, you're great. And I go and check your shit out. And we are not in alignment. I'm not coming on the show." (Lesley: Yeah) Even though you want me to.Lesley Logan 21:28  Yeah, thank you for being here. (Lesley and Michael laughs)Michael Unbroken 21:32  Well, obviously, we're in alignment.Lesley Logan 21:34  We are. Well, we are. And like I, I, you know, for the cynic ...Michael Unbroken 21:40  Good. (Lesley: bills ...) I like them.Lesley Logan 21:43  Bills, how do you like, who wants to pay those? Are you pay them because they're part of the value system that you have? Like, do you know what I mean, these people who are, there's people out there who are going to be they're gonna challenge you on this? And they're like, "Yeah, but what about, you know, taking out the trash? What about these things?" Like, I'm, like, I have a hire housekeeper because I hate doing the dishes, and I'm not going to do them. That's just not how I it's not lighting my fire. It's not making me happy person. It's not making me want to coach anybody (Michael: Perfect) you know, so but what it like, you know, in case people are like, "Yeah, Lesley, it must be nice for you." What do you, what do you think?Michael Unbroken 22:13  Work harder. (Lesley: Yeah) (Michael laughs) I mean, I'm not being crass in that, like, you know, no, but seriously, there was... there's the the mundane of life, you don't get out of that. Nobody gets out of that. My mentor is a freaking billionaire. And sometimes that dude has to wash his own dishes. (Lesley laughs) I've seen him do it. You know what I'm saying? Like, like, let's not be stupid about it for real, like, you're gonna have to do shit you don't want to do. I don't want ...Lesley Logan 22:38  But you're saying you don't say 'yes' to things you don't want to do. So like, you're not saying 'yes', because "Oh, I should do that. You're not saying, you're not doing anything out of like ..."Michael Unbroken 22:46  Let me, let me frame it this way very simply. And I think you'll understand and comprehend exactly what I mean by what I just said. If at any point, I feel like I have to bend or placate myself and chameleon, who I am and the only reason why is so that I feel connected to you. I refuse to do it.Lesley Logan 23:07  Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. Yeah.Michael Unbroken 23:12  But I gotta do the damn dishes. (Michael and Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 23:13  Yeah. Well, thank you. But thank you for being honest. And also thank you, thank you for the challenges because I do I love what you said earlier. And it makes sense here it's like the negotiations and and bending around is just keeping the complaints is just is making you stay where you are and not live the life you want to live. And you're saying you don't want to live your life with regret, but I also feel like you don't want anyone, too. You're like, "Let's all, we all do this."Michael Unbroken 23:41  Yeah, but look, I mean, like, honestly, in you know, this, you coach people, right? 7% of people ain't gonna do shit with any of this. (Lesley: Yeah) I can't help you. I can't. I've never saved anyone's life. I get, I get emails literally every day. Somebody's like, "You changed my life." I'm like, "No, I didn't. You did. (Lesley: Yeah) I just handed you a roadmap. You drove the car." And so you know if you want to be a cynic, and you want to complain and you want to, you want to blame the world for your problem. Look, and I will say this, "I get it. I get it. You deserve to blame the world. Play the victim, own it." I was the victim for a long time. I blamed everybody it was everybody's fault. It was your fault. My mom's fault, my my community's fault, teacher's fault, Obama's fault. It was everybody's fault but Michael's fault. Everybody's fault. And on the day that I hit rock bottom, I'm laying in bed after putting a gun in my mouth the night before because I was playing the victim. And I'm laying in bed. So 11 o'clock in the morning and 350 pounds, eating chocolate cake, smoking a joint and watching the CrossFit games. Nobody put me there but me and it was in the moment that I got my ass up and I went and I looked in the mirror, and I got truthful with myself that things changed. You want to play the victim? Own it. Okay, that's your choice. (Lesley: Yeah) That's your decision. I know it's fucking hard. I know it is. I'm, I'm a guy who is an orphan, who grew up with the most abusive parents you could ever possibly imagine. Who stole foods to survive. Who did not graduate high school, who has no formal education, who has written number one best selling books. I have one of the top podcasts in the world. I've coached hundreds of thousands of people. And I feel very good about who I am today. (Lesley: Yeah) You make a decision. Nobody feels sorry for you. I'm sorry. I'm not being an asshole. I swear to God, I'm not. Nobody cares. They're not thinking about you. And there's no Disney moment. Nobody is coming to rescue you. So if you want what's next in your life, as much as it pains me to say it, you gotta go earn every fucking inch.Lesley Logan 26:06  Yeah, that's the I mean, that's the truth. And that's an it's it is. What do they say that the truth is hard to swallow? (Michael: Yeah) (Lesley laughs) (Micahel: It is) It's because we know it's true. We know we need it. And, and you are correct. There, I've been in many a situation where I was like, "No one is coming. This is all me. I gotta figure this out. I gotta, I gotta get off this ..." And I think I think that I think the that more people need to be honest, like you are. And it's, you know, because even if, even if you're listening to this, and you're like, "Michael's not the coach, for me." That's fine. But if he's got you at least thinking, "Okay, what am I going to do next? Who am I?" And looking at yourself in the mirror, like, that is a domino effect that I'm so grateful you can have, because every single person I know is on this planet for a purpose. They really do have something to give the people around them deserve to see who they are, and have the real person in their life. And we can't, it it for every day that they're not doing that they're actually affecting all the people around them from having an experience, that could be the best experience I could have with them.Michael Unbroken 27:12  Totally. And I want to say something important that most people are not going to pick up on. You said, some people are probably saying, "Well, Michael is not the coach of me." If you're coming into this conversation with that mindset, you already lost. That kind of fixed mindset. But I'll tell you the most dangerous words I've ever used in my life. That's just how I am, the ultimate fixed mindset. If you're already pre determining the outcome of what is in front of you, because you've made that decision, before you will absorb what is there for you, you have lost. And that's one of the more difficult parts of this life is that you have to actually let your guard down for a moment and receive the information from the person on the other side. No, I'm not your coach. But that doesn't mean there's not something here that might change your life.Lesley Logan 28:01  Yeah. Yeah, I think I found myself there's been a couple times my podcasts have come up, and I've seen other guests, and I'm like, "Ah, I'm almost that person." And I'm like, "You know what, I'm gonna go listen, that person, something about it bothers me. And I'm gonna learn something about myself right now." And I have found that to be one of the most amazing challenging decisions you can make is to put yourself in a room you think isn't for you, or a person is not for you. And it's still, it's still not might be the person that you're, you're going to hire or you're going to go follow or you're going to listen to again. But every time I've learned something about me, and me, and it's made me a better person, more understanding person, a person who challenges herself more like it's pretty awesome. So I agree with that. And I think, um, I wish, I wish somehow we could teach kids when they're in kindergarten, what fixed mindset versus what an abundance mindset? You know, I feel like that is like, way more important if you don't you, sometimes you don't even catch yourself doing that fixed mindset stuff, even when I was where I wanted this house that we're in. And I literally said to my therapist, "I'm really nervous. Like, what if we don't get in." And she's like, "Well, that's not the abundance mindset you have." And I was like, "Oh, my God. How did I just do that?" So it's this one, we it's a, it's a mindset that we almost need other people to call us out on sometimes if we can't call ourselves out.Michael Unbroken 28:04  Yeah. 100%. And you've got to be paying attention too. You know, I'll give you a great example, I was with my mentor the other day, and we were talking about money. And I was telling him how much money I was spending on something. He goes, "Man, that ain't your problem. You don't, you don't have a five figure problem. You got a million dollar problem, and you need to go figure out how to get it." Because I was like, I've limited myself financially for so long. Like, even though I've done very well, I made my first 100,000 at 20 years old, like I know how to make money, but he was like, "Look, dude, the reality is like, you need to understand the abundance of money being your friend." And I was like, "Damn, son, that was good" because I booked a hotel. It started because I, the whole conversation started because I was like, "Hey, I booked this hotel." And I go, "Yeah, it was pretty cheap." And he goes, "That's your first problem." And I was like, "Yep." And I cancelled the hotel immediately. And I got a nice hotel, right? Because it's like, even changing that mindset of that is like, you have a difference between $7 isn't gonna make or break you (Lesley laughs) that you come from this, like, poverty mindset, and you need someone there for you. (Lesley: Yeah) That's why we have coaches, we have mentors, because I need somebody to like kill that was a dumb fucking decision that you're doing based off of the experiences of your past. Thus, the same thing I talk about is the same thing I go and learn from people, causation and correlation. Why am I cheap? Because growing up, I was poor, and we were homeless, and I had to steal food to survive. And so I'm freaked out about money. And then I'm like, "Wait a second. Last year, I spent six figures on my own personal development." And now I'm thinking like, "How do I spend seven?"Lesley Logan 30:56  Yeah, I so understand the money mindset. Because my husband and I grew up poor in different ways. His parents actually are accountants. So they're very good with money, and very frugal with it. And they have lots of things because they did work. I was I grew up elder millennial. You screen the phone calls, because it was the bill collectors and you would wait and see if it was your friend or if his grandma, "Oh, nope, it's discover." And so I, to this day, still have a problem answering the phone because I'm like, it must, "I owe no one money." And I'm like, "It could be a bill collector though." Like I it's just it's a thing and it's awareness I have but (Michael: Totally) something that I started in 2013 when I was homeless again. And some of my friends were like, "You were homeless?" I'm like, "If you didn't know like, where are you? I was couchsurfing. I probably slept on your couch." Um, but but I learned like, never again, am I gonna get the cheap apartment, I'm gonna get the apartment I want. Never again, am I going to get the cheap car and make the car I want. What if that means I have to ride the bus until I get that car. That's what we're doing. (Michael: Totally) And today, I still don't have a car because I want a different car. I want a G Wagon. And until I can have that G Wagon, I'm going to ride my bicycle or borrow my dad's car because I want a G Wagon in my driveway. And that's what I'm saving up for. And I'm going to have it and it's going to be there. And it's not because material things make me feel good. It's because I know that I when I show up in a space that it feels like it's my surroundings, I show up as fully me, you know, so ...Michael Unbroken 32:30  Yeah. Let's talk about that for a second because (Lesley: Yeah) I think it's really important, right? Because like growing up, I was the same my mom would freak out if you answered the phone at my house, because of bill collectors, she would be like, "Don't you ever answer the phone." And now I look at my life and I think to myself, like those things that happen to us, like they matter. Like and yes, we can laugh about it. Like I'm gonna write a dark comedy about my childhood one day. (Lesley laughs) But you know, you can laugh at it. But the truth about it is those things impact you, and I'm in full agreement with you. Do not settle. Do not settle the life that you want to have. Now, look, if you you aren't making fucking $20,000 a year, you're not going to G Wagon. Like go figure your shit out, (Lesley laughs) right? But but also put yourself in a position to be able to do that education, information, be in the right rooms, have a mentor, get a coach and commit, like commit, put the money on the line. Like that's the thing like I think about this all the time. If you want your life to change, you've got to adapt this acronym I created called TEAM - Time, Effort, Energy, Money, You're gonna have to invest one, but you're probably going to have to invest all for, like, pick the direction of the thing that you want in your life and commit to it. And do not negotiate with yourself until you get it. Like I remember this a couple years ago, I was like, "I want Grant Cardone to invest in one of my businesses." Grant Cardone invested in one of my businesses. Like, "I want, I want Tom Bilyeu to be my mentor." Tom Bilyeu is my mentor. "I want to write a best selling book." I've written a best selling book. "I want to have a top podcast." I have a top podcast. "I want to have the greatest minds on planet earth come and speak with me." They do it. Why? Because as I went through the hell of building the life that I want to have, that's what this looks like, and that committing to those dreams, you get, we get so scared, right? Because we go, "Oh man, if I get the house, and it's $800 a month, well then I'll stop eating Starbucks." But that that doesn't solve your problem. The thing that solves your problem is putting yourself in a position to be more successful than you've ever been by committing harder than you ever have. And eliminating all things that are not moving you towards your goals. That means (Lesley: Yeah) no fucking Netflix. That means no brunch with the girls on Sunday. That means getting your ass up at 4:30 in the morning because you got kids who get up at six and working on building your life until the moment that you go to bed every single night. You don't want it bad enough. Like that's the problem, people are hearing this and they're like, "I want this life." Show me your calendar. Show me your calendar. And I'll tell you if you want this life or not.Lesley Logan 35:15  Yeah, that's you or that's that's it. It's you don't want it bad enough. I think I had on a woman who Hazel Ortega shucks at miracle goals. And what was really cool about that was like challenge that she made. She's like, "Don't just create goals. I want miracle goals. I want goals that are so God sized." So you could your brain couldn't logically figure out how to get them. So you can't talk yourself out of them. Because it's a miracle, then then you can believe in miracles, and then things will happen for you. But so many people make their goals, something that's attainable. And then, because it's like, hmm it makes their life this much better. They don't actually change their life to have it because it's not big enough. You have to, I really do believe that you have to make them big enough that you want it so badly that you show up at 4:30 in the morning. I did. I remember when I had my full time job that paid the bills with the health insurance and all the things and I had the side hustle and I had a private clients. And I slept three hours a night. And I know a lot of people thought I was crazy. A lot of people thought something's wrong with her. And now I get to sleep more. But it's still work every day, you still have to show up every day, you still have to change not just yourself, but how you think about things, how you how your day has made you change your location, you know, like there's things people have to do. And those are hard decisions to make. But if you want it bad enough, you will.Michael Unbroken 36:28  Yeah. And look, and I'll say this too, like I'm not about that hustle culture life. I'm not about it. I'm about doing what I want. That's it. And if I don't want to, like I tell people all the time, you know, I've built this business. I've done so much to help people. If I wake up tomorrow, I don't want to do this anymore. It's all gone. I promise you it is. It's gone. Why? Because life is about doing what you want. Have fun, enjoy. I love doing this. I love it. I love being on stages. I love writing books. I just finished writing my third book just today, like do what you want, do what makes you happy. But I promise you, I have to get up at 6am to write the damn thing because I'm busy the rest of the day. And like that's the thing about this, like, you know, there, I think there's something that like recognizing the truth that you have to be obsessed with the life that you want to create. And if the people around, you're like, "Oh, you're a workaholic," I promise you, you're around the wrong people. Because they don't get it. They don't get it. They're not ready for the truth. They don't want the reality of the truth that you are gonna go and be fucking great. And you deserve it. But it ain't gonna fall into your lap. And the secret ain't real. You got to put in work.Lesley Logan 37:35  Yeah. And I like when you say that you're not about the hustle. It's very different. You're not doing this for the hustle sake of it or for the busyness of it or for the things it's, it's these are the things you want to do. And this is how you have to structure the day to get those things that you want to do done.Michael Unbroken 37:51  Yeah. And I'll tell you this, do I want to be wealthy? Yep. 100%. One of my biggest goals is to make this company a $25 million a year company. I'm nowhere close, yet. Do I want to own a hel... helicopter? Uh huh. Yep, sure do, can't afford one, yet. Will... Right? Do I want to speak on the biggest stages in the world? Fuck yeah. Like one of my biggest goals is speak in front of 50,000 people, the biggest stage I've ever spoken is 10,000. I'm only a fifth of the way there. I ain't there yet because (Lesley: Yeah) I'm not good enough yet. I haven't learned the skills yet to put me in that position. And all the people around me over the years who have called me a workaholic, who have said I'm crazy, who say I work too hard. Those people aren't even my friends anymore. And you know why? It's not because I don't love them or cherish them because many of them I do. But I can't be aligned with people who want to bring down my dreams, because I'm not going to sacrifice my mission for anybody. And on a long enough timeline, like the truth about it is like you'll you'll look at your life. And you'll go on you'll see those people. I looked up a friend the other day on Facebook. I haven't seen him in like 10 years. We were best friends growing up. Do you know what he was doing? The same shit we were doing 20 years ago. And I want to be clear about something. If you're happy, if you're content, if you love your life, if you're not complaining, you already won. Don't change anything. If your content make them 30 grand a year, fucking awesome. That is great. But if you lay in bed at night, and you're like, "I want to go and build this thing." And you weren't willing to do it. I can promise you, on your deathbed. Right before that last gasp that like right before it's over. The word 'regret' is going to come into your head. And this will have been a life unlived.Lesley Logan 39:46  Oh, Michael, you are amazing. I could talk to you or listen to you for hours. Thank goodness you have a podcast. Okay, Michael, where do you hang out? What's your favorite social? Where's your podcast at? So all the places where can they find you?Michael Unbroken 40:02  I don't have a favorite social but I'm everywhere at Michael Unbroken. Literally everywhere and the podcast is Think Unbroken Podcast or thinkunbrokenpodcast.com or just search 'Think Unbroken', it's not that hard to find. Literally, everything I teach is there for free. The books are on there for free. The programs are on there for free. Everything is for free all the time, 24/7 because my mission is to end generational trauma in my lifetime.Lesley Logan 40:27  Yeah, well, we'll put all the links in the show notes below. Okay, I asked everyone this, you've given us plenty of action items, but just in case someone needs it wrapped up in a bow, bold, executable, intrinsic or target steps people can take to be it till they see it. And for you, I know it's that you just do it every day. But like what we got.Michael Unbroken 40:47  Well first, and I just want to say thanks for having me because you are allowing me to share this space with you. You're a part of my mission. And that means the world to me. Look. The truth about it is this, the life that you want to have it's it's fucking right here. It's right here. It's like literally, you can reach out and touch it. But nobody's gonna hand it to you. And if you ask yourself this question, and the answer is anything less than no excuses, just results, you will never, ever have the life that you want to have. So you need to ask yourself, "What am I willing to do to have the life that I want to have?"Lesley Logan 41:32  That's a great question. That's great. Ouf. Well, I love it. I love it. I love that question. I almost, almost want to have it where I can see it every day. Because I think it's a good one to ask yourself each day. Michael, thank you for being here. Thank you for sharing your mission and sharing your journey and sharing your truth. It's beyond and I'm really grateful, really, really grateful. So you all how are you going to use this in your life? What are you going to do? We want to know. So screenshot this, tag @michaelunbroken, tag the @be_it_pod and actually let us know because I know that, I know for myself when I see those things. It just shows how much action you're taking. And for those of us who are trying to change the world, it lets us know that's working, or doing is helping and so let us know. Share this episode with anyone that you know who needs it, who needs what Michael is saying, who needs his resources, and until next time, Be It Till You See it.That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell 43:05  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.Lesley Logan 43:16  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.Brad Crowell 43:20  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 43:28  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.Brad Crowell 43:41  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this week's episode, I talk with Amber Shaw about the Wellness Revolution and how we can get off the diet roller coaster and move to a more sustainable lifestyle. Amber is a Women's Weight Loss and Health Coach who has overcome bulimia and frequent restrictive dieting. Now, she helps other women shed the weight and feel confident. She shares with us tangible steps that we can take when we feel stuck. The first step is to get quiet with ourselves- even if it's for 5 minutes every day. She also encourages us to connect with our intuition and to trust it. And lastly, to go to therapy.  Amber pointed out that mental health dictates our physical health and so, therapy should be used as a preventative tool. I added that mental health also dictates how you're able to show up in your life and that the best antidepressants are exercise, getting outside in the sun, and sleep. With this in mind, Amber's monthly membership, the Wellness Revolution, aims to change the game in health and wellness as it encourages women to stop restrictive dieting and create a sustainable lifestyle. While adopting a balanced diet may be a slower process than dieting, it allows us to eat in moderation rather than completely cutting out foods. She also suggests daily body movement with strength training 3 times a week as part of a healthier lifestyle. Additionally, we discuss how we can get started with this lifestyle without the overwhelm. Amber recommends simply starting small. Commit to one workout, or plan one healthy meal at a time, and grow from there.  Amber shares two key tips to help if we get demoralized when we don't see results. The first is to put the scale away. She explains that other factors can reflect progress more accurately than the results on a scale. The second is to be patient. Since losing weight is not linear, long lasting transformation takes time. Amber's final advice to us is to stop the dieting. It affects our mental health and ultimately sets us up for failure. She invites us to examine our relationship with food and start to heal it now. Key PointsAmber Shaw explains why restrictive dieting is unhealthy and why we should create a healthy, sustainable lifestyle instead.She provides tangible steps that we can take when we feel stuck.We discussed the importance of mental health and the need for therapy.She provides advice on how to get started with a healthier lifestyle and what to do when we don't see results. Amber helps women shed weight and feel confident through her monthly membership, the Wellness Revolution.List of resources mentioned in the episode: The Universe Has Your BackConnect with Amber Shaw:Instagram | TikTok (@msambershaw)Wellness RevolutionThe Wellness Revolution PodcastThank you for listening to the Millennial Health Podcast. If you have questions or comments feel free to reach out on Instagram and Twitter @DrJDisclaimer: The opinions expressed herein are my own and do not represent those of my employer.

Clarity leads to confidence. Clarity leads to process. Laugh along with Brad and LL as they talk about clarity and how to find it admidst life's changes. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:  - How to begin in the collaborating world  - Soul mapping and tracking your improvements   - “Life Lifes” and how you deal with the change  - Getting clarity to move forward   - Recognizing why you are hurrying to relax and prioritize. Episode References/Links:  - Retreat  - Soul mapping: Tori's resources  OPC Flashcards:OPC Flashcards are on AmazonOPC Flashcards are on our site  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.  ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Social MediaInstagramFacebookTik TokLinkedIn Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:01  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co hosts in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the abundant convo I have with Tori Gordon in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened that episode, stop this now, go back and listen to that, or listen to this and then go listen to that. Or, you know, listen to some and then some of the other, whatever you want to do. If you do you, this is the life that you're being it till you see it. So have fun and just see how it goes. Well, we are really close to The WE+LLthy Mindset with Erika Quest kicking off. And (Brad: Oh yeah) I'm really excited because this is something we only do annually. So it's like we work on it for a year. (Brad: Yeah) Percolates, sits there, she and I work on it for a year and then we do it. So I'm just really excited to actually like do the thing. But then I'm gonna have sadness, because then we're done with the thing. So anyways, that kicks off soon. And, Brad, isn't it so exciting, our retreat doors are open... (Brad: To the public. Yeah) For the for the fitness business studio owner and teacher (Brad: Yeah) retreat.So this is Profitable Pilates, if you are running a fitness business and you're feeling stuck, or you feeling like you're just kind of in a hamster wheel, where you're, you're like, just managing all your clients, and you know that whole, like, take a look back, look back at the last six to 12 months and be like, like, "Did you move the ball forward?" Right? And if the answer that is, you're feeling frustrated, and you're not really sure how you're moving it forward. Come join us (Lesley: Yeah) in, you know, in October. So it's going to be amazing. The first one we had was a couple of weeks back. And I'll tell you it was incredible experience we had, like 24 ladies (Lesley: Yeah) out of place (Lesley: none on zoom and 24 in person) Yeah. Wow. It was really ama... an incredible experience. I'm sure you've heard us talk about it multiple times. But if you want more information about that, just go to profitablepilates.com/retreat. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) And you will see everything there. If you have any questions, you can just send us a DM or, you know, ask any questions, ask all the questions. (Lesley: Yeah) I'm actually even happy to jump on a call with you. (Lesley: Yeah) So let us know.Yeah, we're I'm, I just I can't wait to see who else signed up for that we're already pretty much half filled, or at least at the time of recording this actually, we could be filled by the time you hear this. So ...Brad Crowell 3:00  That's also true.Lesley Logan 3:04  Lesley: That's also true. (Brad laughs) But the people ...Brad Crowell 3:09  In that case, get on the waitlist.Lesley Logan 3:11  Yeah, the people who have signed up already that I'm just like, I can't even wait to have them here and like, get my hands on them and their business and in all the best ways, all the good ways. So what is our audience question?Brad Crowell 3:24  This is a fun one. So if you haven't heard Erika Quest has been coaching inside of Agency. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) And she only makes her coaching available inside of Agency now. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) And that is Lesley and I feel super honored that she that she's here with us, and that she's coaching instead of Agency, because she's brilliant. (Lesley: Yeah) And the question was, "How did you start collaborating with someone as amazing and, you know, (Lesley: Yeah) famous as Erika Quest?"Lesley Logan 4:00  Yeah, yeah, like, and also like, because I'm assuming the person is wanting to also figure out ways to collaborate. And, you know, I'll say like, I'll tell you my story, you can see yourself in it, and then I'll give you some tips. So, Erika actually reached out to me, because I was putting out content around business advice. And she was doing the blogging for business advice for Bounce Body. And so, you know, she, she was looking for people who were doing what she was needing that for. And then she reached out to me, we did not become fast friends. We just became acquaintances. And then we would see each other on the like tours at the, thing, but it was a slow going like we'd see each other twice in one year and then like, we talked in between a little bit and then we had a phone call and I asked her for some advice. She asked me for some advice. So as we like, built a friendship, and then I was very clear with her what my goals were, and she was clear with me on her goals were and we support each other. And that has led to a collaboration. And so what I would just say is like, collaborations come, it's like dating, everything goes back to dating. (Brad: Yeah, right.) You can not go to bed with someone on the first night and expect amazing collaboration. Some people get married on the first date. And yes, there are stories that works out. Not everyone who got married, the first date does that. We've all seen 90 Day Fiancé. So my point is ... (Brad laughs)Brad Crowell 5:26  Except for Brad, but yeah, sure.Lesley Logan 5:28  He haven't seen it but he has, he can envision it. So the point is, like, warm up to people, share, be vulnerable, tell them what your goals are, ask them what their goals are, and then see where your goals align, and then do little things together. Not a full on retreat, not a full on program, like an hour long thing. (Brad: Right) And then maybe a two hour long thing and really see if you like to work with the person, if you like their values for work or their work ethic, because we have had collaborations that monetarily were successful. But on the other side, were not as successful. And so not everyone's gonna be the right partner. But you know, and also again, took time, I think she must have reached out to me in 2017. Yeah ...Wow. I mean, that was (Lesley: Yeah) before we were doing. That was like, Agency started in 2018.Yeah, so she reached out to me when we were just blogging (Brad: Hmm) cuz it was just my blogs and my book. (Brad: Right) And I've been (Brad: Wow) doing that for a while.And then she didn't join us as a coach until 2021. (Lesley: Yeah) So years later.Yeah. (Brad: Wow) Yeah. And we didn't do WE+LLthy Mindset together until 2021. We did another thing together in 2020, with Mychele Sims and Tosh Edwards. (Brad: Right) Um, and that was our first like, actual four way... (foray?) (Brad: foray) foray. (Brad: foray) I'm also say it four way because it was but not that kind. (Brad laughs) But like it was, so that was our first time working together and actually, like, marketing something together and with some other people. And so again, test it out (Brad: Yeah) before you like, really like, before we like sign on deadlines of contracts. We tested a lot of things out. (Brad: Yeah) So collaborations are amazing. But you know, it's okay, if one didn't work out. It's like dating. You didn't marry your first boyfriend or girlfriend either. Maybe you did and lucky you. (Brad laughs)Brad Crowell 7:19  Okay, awesome. Now let's talk about Tori Gordon. From finally reaching a breakthrough to recognizing how to express her grief. Tori Gordon has now made it her life's mission to provide tools to transform lives. Tori is an Award-Winning Content Creator, Founder of The Coachable Podcast, Trauma Informed Breathwork Facilitator. She's a Master Coach and your biggest supporter to helping you achieve your highest potential.Lesley Logan 7:52  Yeah, so she, you know, what's crazy is I someone introduced me to her and said, "You two should do a podcast swap." (Brad: Ha!) And then Amber Shaw, our dear friend. (Brad: Yeah) She said, "Oh my gosh, I have to introduce you my friend Tori." And I was like, "I'm already having a call with her. We are already having a call." (Brad laughs) So it's just kind of funny how like, the world is so small. (Brad: That's funny.) Yeah. (Brad: I didn't know that.) And, Tori went to the same Breathwork Training that I am finishing up. SoThat's I was wondering, so yeah, cuz Trauma Informed Breathwork Facilitator sounded familiar. I was like, "Wait a minute." (Lesley: Yeah, yeah.) Light bulb.Same here. But yeah, so it just like, I mean, she went through, you know, a several years ago. So but it's it's just like, like attracts like, somehow you'll just actually meet people by putting yourself out there and asking for what you need. (Brad: Right?) So, yeah. So what I love one of the she said so many things.Brad Crowell 8:46  Yeah, there was, this is like, packed. (Lesley: This is a packed podcast.) Yep. (Lesley: Um, and ...) I literally listened to it twice to prepare for the recap, because I was like, "Woah!"Lesley Logan 8:56  Yeah, there's some really great stuff. And, and one of the things she talked about was her soul mapping. And she actually made a freebie for y'all. So it's in the show notes. But ...It's in the show notes on the last episode, we'll put it in this one too.Okay. Look at that, just making it easy. So she talks about soul mapping and what that means, like tracking and bringing attention to your improvement. And I just love this because I really don't think that we, as a human, society actually focus on what we did do. And we don't give credit on on any improvement because like, we we think that like the finished like, it has to be X high to get the gold star. And if it's halfway there, then it's not a gold star. And it's like actually, especially in the beginning, little, little improvements are very compounding, you know, like, they're just, they're just very compounding. And we can't, we can't discount that. So like yeah, maybe you didn't run around the whole block, but you ran at the corner. (Brad: Yeah ...) And the more you do that's gonna be easier.Brad Crowell 9:57  I'm not gonna lie. I've been experiencing this myself. (Lesley: Yeah) You know, you know where I'm going with this. (Lesley: Yeah, Brad and I went for a run.) Yesterday, I decided to go for a run (Lesley: Yeah) for like the first time in like, years. (Lesley: How far did you go?) I made, I set a timer. I thought, "Alright, I'm gonna do 20 minutes, and I'm gonna run one direction for 10. And then when the timer goes off, I'll set the timer again. And I'll run 10 minutes back." And I made it about two blocks. And then I walked. (Brad laughs) (Lesley: Yeah, so you walk until your timer) And then I started running (Lesley: went over) and then I started walking. And then I started running and then I started walking. And I thought, "Damn, I'm out of shape." But I also thought, "Alright, you know, like I can, I can dig it." You know, I mean, I remember when I was younger, like being out on the soccer field and having no subs. You had a run for 90 minutes. I don't know how I did that, then, you know.Lesley Logan 10:53  Youth. But also (Brad: Yeah, youth) like, also consistency. But so what you ... (Brad: Yeah, consistency was certainly part of it.) What you can do now as you can pick another day to go for a run and do the same route. And if you run a little further than two blocks, you can track that. And then if (Brad: Yeah) you walk a little less, so this is something like ...But then I can celebrate it and be like, "Hey, I made it two and a half blocks or I made three blocks."You can celebrate that you even went outside, the intention is still there, whether (Brad: Yeah) you do it or not, is actually the extra credit. And, and and for my overachievers listening, I promise you this is life changing. But you know, I don't run once it gets hot in the morning. So then when it gets cool in the morning, I have to start a new and ...Oh, so literally, you're doing this every year.... every year now that we're in Vegas. (Lesley: Yeah) I run from the house until I like give myself a mark. And then I walk the route we're gonna run. And then you know, a week later, I tried to go half a block longer or a block longer or two like and then all of a sudden, we're running around three blocks longer. It is (Brad: Hmm) crazy how compounding it is. But you got to give your muscles the ability to get strong, to get ready so that you're not so sore. The next day, you don't want to do this, it's gonna be working out. It could be anything, it could be writing poetry, sitting down for three (Brad: Yeah) hours, write poetry is going to be exhausting if you've never sat down and wrote wrote poetry for three hours. But eventually, you get in this flow state. I was talking with Claire the other night about she was, she was just like, "I'm gonna write for 30 minutes." And, and she ended up writing for an hour and a half. But that's because she's been practicing writing for 30 minutes. (Brad: Right) So, tracking and bring attention to your improvements and celebrating that you did. That is so so important. You will actually go further if you pat yourself on the back more often.Yeah, celebrating is is, I feel like it's the key.Yeah. (Brad: You know) Yeah, it is. It's free dopamine, by the way. It's free. You don't have to, you don't have to scroll on Instagram to get it. You can actually get to yourself. (Brad: Yeah) What did you love?Brad Crowell 12:51  Well, yeah, so she said something that made me laugh really hard. She said, "Life lifes." And I thought that's, that's, that's fucking brilliant. (Brad laughs) Effectively, that life is uncertain and that change is inevitable, right? And, for me, it's the reason I connected with this is because I've always said, "Change is good." Like, forever, I said that since I was yea big, "Change is good. Change is good." Right? And, but she she kept coming back to this idea of like, being in the moment. And, and being willing to able, willing and able to roll with it when life lifes. Right? Because what do we say, "Oh, life got in the way." Yeah, you know, like, "Shit, I hit the fan. Life got in the way or whatever. COVID." Like, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, we just say that we now that become these like blanket statement terms. And I just thought it was so funny, life lifes, (Lesley: Yeah) you know. And I was like, "Wow, brilliant." So you know, being able to allow for change to happen that is unexpected, right? Like we all want some kind of change to happen in our lives in a good way. Because we got up we got a strategy, we got a plan, we're going in a direction, right? But what if you don't actually, what if something derails that plan or, you know, whatever, like, for example, you're going to hear this in a couple of weeks and interview that (Brad laughs) that's coming up, where were one of your guests was talking about being on the way to a gig, and then three of the horses had to go to the vet five hours away. (Lesley: Yeah) And that really complicated things. And then you're like, "Oh, what are we gonna do?" Well, you got it life lifes, so you got to do... (Lesley: Yeah) you got to deal with it.Lesley Logan 14:34  Yeah. (Brad: You know) It's, I mean, and that's, and that's something like if you fight it, you waste more time. (Brad: Yeah) Like if you fight life lifing you are actually just like, it's like, it's like trying to push a boulder up a mountain when you could just turn around and let the boulder roll down. You know, like, and then you know, do the other, I don't know, but I'm just I just think that like, ask yourself why you're resisting that change and uncertainty so much because that would be and like, that's a good place to (dog noise) journals.Brad Crowell 15:03  Yeah, (Lesley: Hi Gaia) life is, life is uncertain and change is inevitable. So, you know, generally, if you can embrace the change, it will, well, it'll make it easier.Lesley Logan 15:15  Yeah, I think it does. I think it's like eating the vegetables you don't like, (Brad: Yeah) you know, (Brad laughs) if you actually eat this, but I know, if you eat them when they're hot, they taste way better than when they're cold. (Brad laughs) So anyways, that's a 9 year old Lesley telling you ... (Brad: That's a quote right there.) (Brad and Lesley laughs) That's a quote Amanda put it on there.Brad Crowell 15:32  Alright, so finally, let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Tori Gordon? I'm going to jump in. She said, "Become clear on what you want."Lesley Logan 15:48  Yeah, I ... (Brad: You know. And I ...) Clarity is so key. If you're like, also, because sometimes we want things because they sound good. So you like I remember writing down on my goals that I wanted to do a yoga teacher training. "What? Why would I do that? Why did I want to do that?"I thought (Lesley: It's like ...) about that, too. Like, like, pretty seriously thought about doing that.Yeah. And I realized that I actually just wanted to know the exercises more not actually become a teacher, which saved me thousands of dollars. SoBrad Crowell 16:16  For me, it wasn't even about the money. It was about the, you know, minimum nine months that it was gonna take me to go through the program. (Brad laughs) You know, like, like time. Right?Lesley Logan 16:26  Yeah. But yeah, but you have to be clear on what you want. Because like, if you were like, "Well, I definitely want to teach this." You might have been like, "Okay, well, nine months is like short and the grand scheme of how long are we teaching it." (Brad: Sure) But if you actually just wanted to know the movements better than like, you know, talking about my BE IT action items. I was like, "What are you in a hurry for?" And, you know, so like, why does the nine months bother you? If it bothers you, because you just want to like, actually, like, nerd out for a little bit. And you don't, then then you can be more clear on what you should be searching for. So, so you know, I just what I did, I totally jumped ahead. So what would you like to finish?Well, yeah, I mean, being clear on what you want, will allow you to also evaluate the the changes that we're talking about where life lifing you know. If you know, if you know exactly what you're going after, or going for or that, you know, that actual path, and then life gets in the way. It will allow you to roll with it, whatever it is a little bit easier. Because here's a perfect example ...Are you talking about our wedding?Brad Crowell 17:37  I am. (Lesley: Oh, my God.) How did you know? (Lesley: I know.) That is so crazy.Lesley Logan 17:40  This is so good. You're in my brain.Brad Crowell 17:43  So when Lesley and I were planning our wedding, we were reading the book, what's it called? (Lesley: A Practical Wedding) A Practical Wedding. We were reading that book, and the beginning of the book, it says, "Pick three things that are actually important." Only three things, right? (Lesley: Yeah) Of all of the things that are gonna happen or going to be involved with this wedding, "What three things actually matter to you?" And we said, "All right, the people, the food and the music." (Lesley: Yeah) Those are the three things that are important to us about this wedding. And what did we not pick? We did not pick the venue, right? Because for us, the venue was less important or not really important at all the... then the other three things. And you know what happened? I'm sure you've heard the story. Five weeks before we were getting married. Our venue canceled us. (Lesley: Yeah) And that was like, well, that was actually like really, like rock the boat, really actually made us really angry. And it was like, incredibly frustrating people that already bought hotels, rooms. And they were like, you know, like, they'd rented cars or not rent cars because of it. There was so much to like, then that limited where we could go because we couldn't move across town. Because, you know, people were already there. So it was, it was really, really frustrating. And what the only thing that really allowed us to roll with it, you know, to allow life lifing was because we we took a step back and we said, "This isn't one of our three things," (Lesley: No) you know, and because we were clear with what was important to us. When that hit the fan. It was still something we had to deal with and it wasn't fun. But it allowed us to kind of move forward without it (Lesley: Yeah) like, really, you know, making things implode.Lesley Logan 19:34  Yeah, no, we actually the wedding didn't have a venue for a week. That was it. Because we actually were able to go, "Well, we just this is what was important to us. So we just need to find a place that allows us to do those things." And we found a better ...Yeah. We found a super amazing, (Lesley: a better thing) it probably better, I would argue that it is better. Yeah.Yeah. Well, everything happens when it's supposed to. So yeah, thank you ... that's a fun story. So anyways, (Brad: Yeah) I think you know nothing can but if you're you have to be clear what you want. Otherwise you don't on how to solve a problem when life lifes.Yeah, totally. So you already kind of spilled the beans here. But (Lesley: I know) you said your biggest takeaway."What are you in a hurry for?" So, I'm impatient. Hi, I see you too. (Brad laughs) And the truth is, is that I love deadlines on goals, because they actually force you to take action. (Brad: Sure) But it's okay if you don't hit a deadline. As long as you evaluate why that was it? Why why didn't you meet the deadline? Did you do need more time to work on this thing? Did you actually work on the thing? Why didn't you work on the thing? Just like getting some clarity around it. Because when you ask yourself, like, "Why does this have to happen on this date?" You can actually get some information like, is it because you just want it to happen? And you want to have a now? Does it, like could it happen at a later date? Would that make it better? Just knowing why you're, what you're in a hurry for will actually allow you to understand like, "Why are you making a deadline of launching a website in a week? Like, what is there a reason?" Now there might be, there might be a reason, but then at least you know.Brad Crowell 21:07  Yeah, I mean, are ... is the timeline arbitrary? Did you create the timeline? And that can be a good thing. It can also just be an incredible amount of stress. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) If there isn't truly a reason, like I used to work for a company that the the boss was like, "When do you want it?" You know and the answer was always "Now." Always for every single thing and ...Lesley Logan 21:31  Right. Which is also not okay, because then everything is a priority, which means nothing's a priority.Brad Crowell 21:35  Yeah, that mean ... Yeah. You didn't let me finished exactly that point. But yes, yes. So the point was then that it was a clusterfuck. Everything was like a super crazy hurry. Right? For no reason, literally no reason. And so then it was like, "Well, you didn't know actually what the, what I should be working on." And, and then it to make it even worse, you didn't know what question you were going to be asked about what project. So it was, it was incredibly stressful, and it caused unnecessary stress. And so I think that writing out what you're in a hurry for is a two fold thing. First, it will allow you to focus on like the things that actually matter. But two, it will allow you to calm the fuck down, you know, (Lesley: That's a quote.) because if you're like, "I gotta, I gotta ... I gotta get this done." You can like write down, "What is it that you're actually like stressing about? What are you in a hurry for?" Right? And you can then take a step back from that and go, "Okay, is this actually time sensitive? Does this really have to happen this exact second?" You know, and you'll be able to figure that out in a different, a different manner.Lesley Logan 22:41  Yeah, I think it's great. And I also just think, the more clarity, again you have around all the things you want, all the things you're wanting to do, the easier it is going to be for you to see help when it's there. The easier it is for you to see a door opening when it's there, the faster things will actually go. But if you're just making blanket statements, blanket goals without any actual curiosity around them, exploration around them, understanding of what it is that you want. It's just going to make you feel like you're running in circles or maybe you're actually like just missing the turnoff. I'm thinking of National Lampoon when they're just going big ... Like, "Hey, kids, Big Ben." And they just like, they just like can't got out of the turn about (Brad: They're going in circles ...) you know because... Yeah, cuz he has no clarity around where he's going. Right? So anyways, I love Tori. She's great. We'll have to have her back. You can check out on The Coachable Podcast. I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell 23:32  And I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 23:33  Thank you so much for joining us today. How are you going to use these BE IT action items in your life? Tag me at the @be_it_pod and Tori Gordon to let us know. Also just you know, whenever you share a podcast you are literally helping the podcast continue to grow even if you (Brad: Yeah) text it to one person. And so whether it's this podcast or any other podcast you like, currency to them is actually you sharing their podcast, (Brad: Yeah) writing reviews. And so please check her out. Check us out and (Brad: Yeah) share ...Brad Crowell 23:58  That person that you just thought, "Wow, they should hear this message." Send them the pod.Lesley Logan 24:02  Yes, please. (Brad: Yep) And and and it will actually continue to change everybody. Right? (Brad: Yeah) And then that makes it easier for you to be more curious if everyone around you is more curious. So anyways, until next time, Be It Till You See It.That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell 24:49  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.Lesley Logan 24:49  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.Brad Crowell 25:25  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

A taboo topic no more, today's conversation is all about changing the mindset around sex so that women can sprout roots of confidence into every area of their life. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Expectations not met Working to become sexually resilientRecognizing the impact of previous sexual messages Erasing the performance based sex mindsetIntentional sexualityHow to incorporate sex education into the homeChanging the conversation around sexBIO: Dr. Celeste Holbrook is a sexologist, speaker and author who has dedicated her life to helping women achieve soul-centered sex through perfectly planned mental and behavioral changes. She inspires women to move through mental blocks surrounding their intimate lives to truly experience the sex that was spiritually designed for her. Hundreds of women have dramatically changed their relationships by following the sexual and spiritual strategies that Dr. Holbrook has created and tailored specifically for them. Her favorite moment is the spark that appears in a woman's eyes the instant her sensual confidence is re-awakened.Episode References/Links:WebsiteIGFB  OPC Flashcards:OPC Flashcards are on AmazonOPC Flashcards are on our site  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.  ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Social MediaInstagramFacebookTik TokLinkedIn Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:01  Hey, Be It babe, how are you? Ah, thank you for being here. All right, I have a very special guest and a very important topic for us today. I have Dr. Celeste Holbrook here. She is a sexologist. So she is a sex educator. And so if you are listening to this with your earpods out, and you've got little ones around, and you would like to be the voice that talks to them about sex, then I highly recommend this as an earpod moment. Save this for when you're by yourself. However, I do hope that this inspires you, for my parents out there to have conversations, conscious conversations with your children about sex. And when I heard Dr. Celeste on another podcast, I was like, "I have to have her on." I have to have her on because I too often see women um, taking on a responsibility and a role around sex in the bedroom with their partner in a way that is not shared responsibility. And it's it's just like a lot of pressure. And I didn't even know what she was going to say until I started the Zoom conversation. And I told her why I wanted to have her on. I told her what I was thinking. And she said this thing that you're going to hear. And instantly I was like, "Yeah, you have to say that again on the podcast, you have to." Because ladies, there are so, there are so many factors that keep us from being it till we see it. And there are lots of little things we can do to make the day go better. And then there's also a major part of our lives and how we see ourselves and how we, how we ask for what we need. Ask for what we want. And and if and I I know that once you listen to this interview with Dr. Celeste Holbrook, you are going to, you're going to 100% understand that really getting clear on your sexual desires and your sexual resilience is key to being it till you see it. So with that, I hope you dive in, grab a pad of paper and some notes. She has a really amazing homework assignment for you. And I want to have her back. So let me know if you want to have her back because I want to have her back. I'm gonna have her back anyways. But um, I just think that, you know, this is a really awesome conversation. And I'm grateful for you to be here. I'm grateful for Dr. Celeste for saying "yes" and for sharing her amazing knowledge and her story. Because I do think that this conversation will change lives. And it's necessary, it's necessary to be it till you see it, it's necessary to have this conversation. So thank you for being a listener. And and here she is. Here's Dr. Celeste.Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Alright, Be It, Be It babes. I have Dr. Celeste Holbrook here. She is a sex educator. And oh, my frickin' goodness when I heard her speak on our friend Amber Shaw's podcast, I was like, "How the heck do I get her on my podcast ASAP?" And it's because of what she talks about. And you're gonna hear it. I think it's gonna make so much sense. Why I want to have her on here. But I'm gonna let her introduce herself. So Celeste, thank you for being here. Can you tell everyone who you are and what you're rocking out right now?Celeste Holbrook 4:16  Oh, thanks, Lesley. It's really exciting to be on your podcast. And I really appreciate you trusting me with this content. It's definitely close to my heart and something we need to talk more about. And so I always appreciate when people provide those safe spaces for us to have these conversations. So thank you very much for having me on. My name is Celeste Holbrook. I'm a sex educator. My mission in life is to provide safe spaces for people to talk about sex. I believe that if we can, you know grow in this very vulnerable part of our life like in our sex life, we can grow in other areas of our lives that grows confidence or confident roots into other areas of our life. So it's not, it is about sex, but it's not just about sex. And I I really enjoy working with women and couples to help them find the pleasure and connection that they have always wanted in their sex life. And so that's what I do. I have a practice in Fort Worth, Texas. It's but it's all virtual. So I see everybody online on Zoom. So I see couples and individuals. And I also teach courses and work for the local sex toy shop to do education there as well. So it's a fun life. Anybody wants to go into sex education, we need more people. (Celeste laughs)Lesley Logan 5:29  I was gonna say. Okay, so so how, how does one go, "You know, I want to be when I grow up? A sex educator." Like, how did this (Lesley laughs) how did this come to be? (Celeste: Right?) (Celeste laughs)Celeste Holbrook 5:38  Right? Yeah, I'm so glad you asked that, because I grew up in a conservative household and a conservative Christian community. And I was always told that you if you, if you wait to have sex until you're married, then your marriage and your sex life are going to be great. And that was what I really believed. And so I did wait to have penetrative sex until I got married. Listen, I did everything else because (Lesley and Celeste laughs) it (Lesley: I went ...) was too much fun not to.Lesley Logan 6:06  Celeste, I went to a Christian University and (Celeste: Mm-hmm) the, I, the creative things people were doing. I was like, (Celeste: Yeah) "Wow, I didn't, I just was having sex." (Lesley and Celeste laughs)Celeste Holbrook 6:07  You're just going for it and we were just like...... I was like, "Oh, that rule I'm breaking." (Lesley laughs)Yeah. Yes. Good for you. Good for you. Yeah. Um, yeah, I got... I was real creative. (Celeste laughs) But I waited to have to have penetrative sex, till I got married. And then once I did get married, I got married in Austin in the morning, because my daddy always said "if you get married in the morning, and if doesn't work out you haven't wasted the whole day." (Lesley and Celeste laughs) So (Lesley: Oh my god.) I know. That's that's like small town, Texas that I grew up in, right. Um, so I get married. We go to the hotel. I like peel off my eyelashes and my ... clip in hair and like my spanx and everything. And we have penetrative sex for the first time. And it is terrible. It's awful. It hurts really bad. And I thought, "Oh my gosh, I have a broken vagina. I must have like, just like a rusty vagina or something." And I thought, "Okay, maybe I just need to do it more like I guess or something." But it didn't get better. Our whole first year of marriage we ha... there was an incredible pain. My partner didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to do. I hadn't gotten any sex education growing up. (Lesley: Right) So I mean, it was abstinence only. And so I was really lost as to what to do. I felt a lot of shame. I felt a lot of guilt. I felt a lot of anger toward my partner. And I went to an OB GYN after the first year and OB GYN did a whole examination sets list, "I don't see anything wrong with you." And then he proceeded to tell me like, "You should just have a baby, and this would get better." Which is ... really ...Lesley Logan 7:55  ... But but, oh, my God, I can't. (Celeste: I know. I know.) Like, because also it hurts to have the sex to have the baby. (Celeste: Right, right) And like, (Celeste: Thank you.) And ... (Celeste: Yeah) Aahh. Okay, that's a whole other topic. But but (Celeste: Yeah) isn't it... Thank you for bringing up how it made you feel? Because I think that that is really the thing, no one actually teaches women, really, you know, unless you had like some (Celeste: Yeah) very open parents, and my grandparents talked about sex all the time. But (Celeste: Yeah) we were always told, like, "Well, you have to wait till you got married." So they actually didn't teach us how to have sex. They just told us like that they had a lot (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: ... about you, that there's.) Yeah, that there's so but it's true. Like so then you're supposed to like know how to do it. And then and then if it doesn't work out, it's something you and as women, I think we obviously go, "Something's wrong with me. (Celeste: Right) It's my fault. (Celeste: Right) Yeah.Celeste Holbrook 8:46  Well, I was told if I waited until I was married, sex would be great. And so I obviously thought something must have been wrong with me. I waited but (Lesley: Yeah) it's not great. (Lesley: Yeah) So yeah, so that was kind of the beginning. Like, in that moment, I thought, "Okay, I'm going to have to do something. I don't need somebody to tell me to stretch out my vagina. I need somebody to walk with me and give me emotional tools and give me sex education. And help me along this path so that I can have sex that feels pleasurable and connective." And so what I did was I just started giving myself better sex education. And that's why I believe in this work so much, is because sex education saved my sex life and my relationship. Like it was literally the thing that saved my life. And so I thought, "Well, gosh, if I'm an educator, you know, I was getting a PhD in Health Education. So I started studying sex education. I was like, if I can help myself, like because I gave myself the sex education I never got and I learned how to have make sex better for myself. And eventually sex is not painful, and then eventually sex was pleasurable. So I thought, if I could do it for myself, I'm sure there's other women out there who experienced something like this I've never talked to anybody who did, but I was sure that there probably was. And so that was kind of the beginning of it. I just, I, it was my own problems that I had to work on fixing. And then I thought I, this has to be helpful for somebody else.Lesley Logan 10:16  Yeah. (Celeste: And I appreciate them.) And I think um, so, you know, it's, I'm sure going through it, no one wants to be through it. They just want to be on the other side of it. But there's like a reason why things happen for you. Because like, now you are educating so many people all over on something that like, it's not exactly like, it's not exactly a comfortable thing to talk about. So like, (Celeste: Yeah) I'm sure you're like, "I'm sure there's other ones going through it and like, but no one's actually talking about." Like, (Celeste: no) outside after church, women are going, "Well, yep, sex was great and like, they're not doing that no one's going. (Celeste: no) I'm actually struggling." Like, no one is saying these things. (Celeste: No) And so like, how, how did you, how did you get started teaching this? Like, how did you get people to actually be comfortable coming to you and talking to you? Do you find that that's like, the next hardest thing is like actually meeting people to say, "Hi, I have a problem I need ..." (Lesley and Celeste laughs)Celeste Holbrook 11:06  Yeah, exactly. Well, after I, I kind of started focusing on sex education, I got a job as a sex educator for a large sex toy company. And I wasn't selling sex toys. But I was internal in the corporate office, answering the questions that came in, like, "Oh, how do I use a sex toy?" You know, a lot of those questions, but a lot of like, "I don't have any libido or sex hurts, or these activities hurts. How can I help? What lubricant should I be using?" And so then I was just like answering these questions over and over. And I realized because the the company I worked for did a good job of providing like, a safe place for women to ask questions, that that's all it took, was providing like accessibility and friendliness. And like a shame free zone, you can ask anything here, there's nothing, you know, off that you can't ask. And people just poured in, it wasn't actually that hard. Like, once you provide the space, then people ask the questions.Lesley Logan 12:05  Oh, my God, that couldn't be more be it till you see it. I have to say, like, I can't believe that it has to be the sex toy company that (Celeste: Right) has to do this though. Like, it's, you know, (Lesley and Celeste laughs) like, you know, the fact that like, someone with low libido can't get that information from a health care person they have to like, that's just that it had to be a little frustrating for you. So you know, people who might be like, "Okay, Lesley and Celeste, it's like, thanks for this, but I'm just trying to like, keep, like, my household sane." (Celeste: Yeah) Can you talk about like how people's lives change if they just have some comfortability, some ownership of their sex life and confidence in that?Celeste Holbrook 12:44  Oh yeah, absolutely. So you talked about, you know, trying to keep this household together or household sane. And one of the things that can be really helpful for people to hear is that responsibility is the biggest killer of arousal. So responsibility is the biggest killer of arousal. So we often say that's why sex can make babies and often babies are the deathblow to sex. (Lesley and Celeste laughs) Because there's, yeah, there's nothing like this big response, you'd have to keep this little potato sack alive. And so it's over the course of our lives, sex changes. And we in the practice, as sex educators, we work on helping people become sexually resilient. Meaning as my body changes, as my partnership changes, as my life changes, how do I continue to find connection and pleasure? And so to answer your question about, you know, how do we, how do we become this in this area that grows roots into other areas, it really is about a continued learning about sex, you're never really done. I'm not done learning about sex. None of us are done learning about sex. Because it changes as our bodies change and our responsibilities change. And so becoming resilient to those changes means, "Okay, this no longer turns me on. I'm going to start exploring what does at this moment instead of like, I no longer get turned on. My sex life must be done." (Lesley: Right) You know ... (Lesley: like instead of ...) it's sexual resilience.Lesley Logan 14:13  Yeah. Oh that's such a go... that's so interesting. And it's so true, because like, it... Well, just to go back to your doctor's advice and how terrible that was, "Go ahead, have a baby." And it's like, that's like the number one killer to sex. (Lesley and Celeste laughs) Like it's painful, or maybe he just like here, and then you won't even have to have the reason you know, (Celeste: Yeah. All right.) But sexual resilience, I think that is really an interesting way to put it because I was I was listening to a podcast where a woman who's over 50 is like, talking about her sex life. And I was like, "Oh, that's so interesting." And then like, because of the way the universe goes, they must have known and I was an interview you because The Daily that did this enter like whole story about having sex in your 70s and 80s. And I was like, (Celeste: Yeah) "I've actually never thought about that." I'm actually (Celeste: Right) never thought like, how do people when they're old have sex? (Celeste: Right) And they were talking about how different it has to be and how and how this isn't. I just think like, "What ah... No one talks about that." (Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 14:47  No one talks about that. Yeah. Not only do we not talk about it, we desexualize anybody that's not young and white. (Celeste laughs) I mean, honestly, we just decent. Like we only sexualize. Yeah, that's not totally true. But we, we definitely do desexualize older people, we (Lesley: Mm-hmm) actually desexualize people with disabilities, we desexualize anything that doesn't fit into this very narrow definition of what we think is sexual. And so yeah, people have sex and through their 90s ... You know like, it's not, you know,Lesley Logan 15:41  And and then and to that point, like, because as growing up, right, like, all I saw was like, "This is what sexy is." And (Celeste: Yeah) then like, if that doesn't make you, if you don't feel good, being sexy that way, then like, again, there's something wrong with you, or there's (Celeste: Right) something like. So, okay, what is like step one, if somebody is like, "Okay, ladies, I'm in. This is like, intriguing me. How do I get sexual resilience?" Like what, how do they or how do they even get comfortable with their sexual desire? Like, what's what do you (Celeste: Yeah) use? (Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 16:12  Yeah, absolutely. I love to start out with this with everybody. I always think about what we want to feel in sex because everything that we do behaviorally, we do it because we want to feel something. So like, I pet my dog, because I want to feel calm. I ride my bike, because I want to feel free. I do certain sex, sexual activities, because I want to feel pleasure, connection, erotic, intimate, loving, whatever it is that I want to feel in sex. And so start with the feeling. So write down my dream sexual experience would feel like and then write those words down. And then you can work your way backwards, like, "Okay, if I want to feel confident, what do I need to do behaviorally in order to feel confident? Maybe I need to learn more about my body. Maybe I need to establish a better relationship with my vulva and my clitoris. Maybe I need to have a masturbation practice. Maybe I need to read some more books." Right? So start with what you want to feel and then work your way backwards, "I want to feel connected. Okay, maybe I need to work on communication styles with my partner. Maybe I need to learn how to ask more for what I want. And maybe I don't know what I want. So maybe I need to take one more step back and figure out what I like and what I don't like and do some more creative exploration in sex," you know. So I like to start out with that list of what we want to feel. Because then you can build behaviors behind that. Lots of times we go into sex, like, "What do I want to do?" You know, like, "I want to use a spreader bar and you know, whips (Lesley laughs) and I wanna rubber and stuff like that." And all that's good and fine. But if it's not getting to what you want to feel, it's, it's gonna fall short. It's gonna fall flat in your sexual experience. So always start with what you want to feel and then build the spreader bars in behind it. (Celeste laughs)Lesley Logan 17:58  Oh my God, yes. Okay, love this. This is how I do goals. Like I people, like I like people are just taking action. And like, "Well, where are we going?" You know, you got to start there and work backwards. So like, this makes so much sense to me. (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Yeah, yeah) And, and, and then it's also like, "Okay, why didn't, why didn't none of us think about that?" (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Yeah) (Celeste laughs) So so so to the woman who is like, maybe because of how they are raised, maybe because like, just like different ideas of what sex is. And like, you know, maybe like, don't have it till you get married and then no one's talked about it. So like you... where do you suggest that even start with that comfortability? Because if they're, if that is like also just boring to them, you know, like, where did they start getting even masturbating might be actually uncomfortable. So like, (Celeste: For sure) where do we go there?Celeste Holbrook 18:47  For sure. And masturbation is very uncomfortable for many, many, many women. This is one of my things that comes up a lot in the practice is women will say, "I went somewhere or my friends just suggested that I get a sex toy and masturbate and that I'd find out what I like." When in reality, if you have never been encouraged to explore your genitals, or you've been told your genitals are gross, or you've grown up in a purity culture, in purity culture, where you know, you're supposed to remain pure and not touch yourself and things like that. It's far more nuanced than just grabbing a dildo and masturbating. Right? So, thinking about getting started out on your sexual journey, it can be very helpful to go back and kind of list out the sexual messages you got growing up. Like, "Who told you about sex? How old were you? What was the message? Did you have a trusted adult in your life that you could ask sex questions to? Where did you get your sexual information? What were your early sexual experiences? Did anybody clothes police you? Tell you your skirt was too short or that your bra strap was going to make boys, you know do do bad things, right? Were you told you were wearing responsible for bad behavior of men?" And so we go back, and we kind of mine for all those messages, because all of those messages harbor in our cells of our body. And we consider that traumatic neglect when you don't give a person sex education that helps them make decisions. It's like not giving a person tools to learn how to eat, right. So we do consider this traumatic neglect. So go back and look at all those messages that are being stored in your body. Because most of those messages are telling your body that sex is dangerous, like if you're told you're going to go to hell, or you're going to be unwantable or unlovable or a depetaled flower. If you have sex before you married, your body just associates that as sex is dangerous. That's its only message, right? And so when you do go to have sex and your body shuts down like mine did, and your vaginas, like, "No, we're trying to keep you safe, you know, we're gonna clamp down and get small," because we're trying to do that, it's our only job as a body is to keep you safe, then it provides pain, or it provides a low libido or it provides low arousal, all things that it thinks is trying to help keep you safe from this thing that it thought was dangerous, right? And so starting out kind of this is the long winded answer the TED the, 20 minute TED talk answer, but I feel really passionate about this, because nobody really talks about this. Is really to go back, especially with a professional can be very helpful, because it can be hard to go back and look at the messages that you've got growing up, they're harboring in your body, and then go and reparent, do inner child work to reparent those messages to tell you like, "Listen, I know you were told that you were going to be unwantable if you have sex but that's no longer true for us anymore in my 40 year old life, you know, so you don't have to be loud in my life anymore. I love you and I see you earlier me. But you don't have to be loud anymore." So it just helps our body relax into, "Okay, I don't have to put up the you know, the fight or flight in order to get out of the situation. I can relax and experience pleasure."Lesley Logan 22:06  Oh, thank you for saying that because I mean, I've heard you know, with my therapist, we've talked about that with my money mindset stuff. Because there's like, a little seven year old Lesley, like, freaking out and I have to go, "Hey, thank you. Hear ya. And we're good actually. We actually have money in the bank all the time now. (Lesley and Celeste laughs) It's okay, (Celeste. You're right ...) we can afford that. We're good." But I never, I never thought about with that. Because I got sent home from school. (Celeste: Oh) Because my my strap on my tank top was not an inch and a half. The thing I actually got sent home for was I was talking back because she said it's not an inch and a half. It has to be an inch and a half or and I said or it said wider than your bra strap and I'm not wearing a bra. So any strap matters. And she called my dad because I refuse to wear the gym clothes (Celeste: Yeah) that they would make you change into. And I was a public school. And I said, "No, I won't. I'll just I'll just take the absence. It's fine." You know, (Celeste: Yeah) and so she had to call my dad and my dad is like, "Who are you calling for?" And they said, "Lesley's not dressed appropriately today." He's like "Lesley?" (Lesley laughs) Because my as my sister is the one who always like dressed with the short skirt, she would take a change of clothes to school. And I was like, (Celeste: Yeah) I'm the upholder, the... I call myself a recovering perfectionist, but obviously then I was the perfectionist 4.2 (Celeste: Yeah) student getting sent home because (Celeste: Yes) this tank top is distracting the boys in her class. (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Mm-hmm) And it is so interesting, because as you say those things I'm sure so many people are nodding their head and listening and like that... you think you think, "Oh, that was just a thing in high school." But we forget that all those things (Celeste: That's right) over our little record players and (Celeste: That's right) they are in our body. And they are telling us things that are taking away our ability to have sexual resilience, as you mentioned, and also just like, confidence in (Celeste: Yeah) ourselves and if we are not, for you said this earlier when we're off the record, but like if we're not confident in ourselves, in our sex, can you, you say it because you have the best way of saying it.Celeste Holbrook 24:03  No, you're fine. Yeah, I I like to think about if we have the ability to ask for what we need and what we want and what we desire in our most vulnerable space. Which one one of our most vulnerable spaces is naked with, you know, maybe somebody's penis in your mouth. And so if we're able to ask for what you want in those spaces, you can ask for a raise at work, you know, like learning the tools and the skill sets to communicate in sex. It absolutely grows roots into other areas of your life. Yeah.Lesley Logan 24:34  Oh my goodness. I mean, thank you for saying that because it's true. If we can be more competent there then it's just almost like so easy to just be confident in these like, fully clothed situations (Celeste: fully clothed situations) (Celeste and Lesley laughs) where like, not like, like bad things really couldn't happen if you're asking your boss for like that. (Lesley laughs) Like (Celeste: Yeah, yeah) I just... Is that something that you discovered in your, like in your your journey of educating people, is that something you've always known? Like, how did you, how did you see that as something that was like changing people's lives?Celeste Holbrook 25:07  I mean, I didn't always know that for sure. Still not sure that I know anything. But um (Lesley and Celeste laughs) to stay one page ahead, right? Um, yeah, I don't know, I don't, I don't know, I just saw the way that things change, especially, you know, one of my specialties is talking to women who grew up in purity culture, and kind of conservative cultures and helping them, em... embracing them, get empowered in their sexuality. And so especially in these cases, where somebody grew up, thinking that they were that sex was like their wifely duty. And then having a 180 turn to, "Oh, like sex is actually pleasure for me and connection for me. And we are two individual people who co create this sex in this third space," instead of like, to becoming one, or leaving and cleaving it is to individual fully represented people, co creating sex, right, that's a big shift. And once you identify yourself as a whole individual sexual person, that's when really like the ma... the magic happens, because you're not, I'm not here to solely server, please this other person, I'm not here as a linchpin to their arousal, like we are told when our straps are too short and (Lesley: Yeah) small, like I, you know, like, if you really think about the psychology of that, it's essentially saying, like, you are in charge for the arousal of men, and that continues in your brain, and even into your married life or your or your relationships, I am responsible for the arousal of men. And so if things aren't going well, it's clearly probably my fault. Just telling somebody their skirt is too short. That's the arc of that message over time.Lesley Logan 26:53  Yeah, (Celeste: Yeah) that's, oh, my gosh, I just had a flashback because, um, my dad, he's turning 70. So when he was in high school, they would make the girls like kneel to see if their skirts (Celeste: Mm-hmm) touch the ground. And I just like, think about all those women who are like, grandparents right now, parents and like, just what that did for potential confidence to do so many things in this world. Like we we think it's just oh, that's in the bedroom, or that happens twice a week or whatever. But like, the more you and I talk, the more you say things, the more I'm just like, so many women are not able to do, something that probably feels very simple, like just like being it till you see it in their job or in their (Celeste: Right) life, or like hosting a book club or, you know, being there for as a friend. And it's like, it's, it's like that, it's almost like if you could go into this one area of your life more deeply. It will do the domino effect to all these other areas. And we started hurting people's sexual resilience when they didn't even know what sex was. (Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 27:55  Right, right. You're totally right. It's I, I love how you say that. We absolutely did. We absolutely did I mean we, yeah, didn't give anybody any information and then told them they were wrong.Lesley Logan 28:05  Yeah. Okay, well, okay, I have some questions for the ladies who are listening because we got a lot of busy mamas. (Celeste: Yeah) A lot of perfectionist, they're... trying to be recovering perfectionist, and just like put a lot of pressure on themselves (Celeste: Yeah) overachievers, those things I imagine are killing a lot of libido. (Celeste laughs) Am I... (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Mama knows, mama knows) ... mama knows as you said. So what are, what are some reasons like they'll all those things are actually like hurting their bedroom, life?Celeste Holbrook 28:40  Right? So if we think about the way we actually learn about sex. Nobody really tells us much about sex, especially if you grew up like you and I did. Nobody really tells us about sex or how are really much about sex other than don't have it and you know, somebody used to tell me, "The best birth control is an aspirin, because you just put it in between your knees." (Celeste laughs)Lesley Logan 29:05  Oh, my gosh. (Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 29:07  I know. I just thought about that. I just thought about that. Anyway, (Lesley laughs) so as far as the way that we learn about sex, we learned about it through media, through media or porn, right? We only see sex modeled in a performative way. And this is very important, because no other part of our life is only modeled performatively. Right? We see other relationships navigating through conflict, we see people cooking, we learn how to cook through seeing other people cook. We learn how to drive by being in cars with adults who are driving. Right? Sex is the only thing we don't see people having sex in a very natural setting. We only see performed sex on film. And so what happens is that becomes our identifier to what good sex is. And so let me connect this to your performers in your audience who want to do things right and correctly and perfect. Right? If our only model for sex is this very performative media kind of focused way, then we're always going to fall short, because sex in media is not real. It's scripted, it's performed, it's angled. It's all of these things that don't actually happen in real life. And so we kind of judge ourselves based on this. Like, I don't know how many times women have come to me in the practice and say, "I don't really think I'm having an orgasm." I say, "Okay, let's talk about it." And we talked about it. And it turns out, maybe she is having an orgasm, but she's not screaming from the mountaintops like it looks like they do in media. And (Lesley: Right) so she assumes that maybe she's not having one, right. And so for your, for any, any of us, all of us, me included, moving away from performance based sex, what am I doing to experience based sex. Sex, first and foremost, is an experience. And something that we feel with all of our senses, which I think is why it's so beautiful, is because it is a merge of all of our senses. And when we are rooted in our senses, we can only feel our senses in this present moment. And so that's why you hear people say, like, I was lost in the moment, it's because I can only touch in this moment, I can think about it in the future, I can think about it from from the past, but I can only experience it in this moment. And so sex is this beautiful experience of senses. And when we think about it, that way, it becomes much more pleasurable, and it becomes much more exploratory versus when we think about it, like, "These are the things I want to do. This is what I want it to look like. I definitely want to have an orgasm every time or we're going to cumm together or whatever." When you loosen the grip on what it looks like, you can feel more of the experience and probably be more fulfilled, because that's what sex really is, is an experience between the two of you, versus a performance that you're doing for some other third person, you know.Lesley Logan 32:12  Yeah. Oh, I keep going back to like, how do you want it to feel like that's like, (Celeste: Mm-hmm) just makes it so tangible? And also like some you can work with and it and you're right, like that performative thing? It's like it, it just, you know, if it's not perfect, you don't have this or you're like, you know, it becomes so much pressure (Lesley laughs) ( Celeste: It is) to put on yourself, how could you even be in the moment because you're like, trying to control all the things? (Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 32:42  Yes, exactly. And if we go back to the earlier conversation of if, if responsibilities is the biggest killer of arousal, and performative sex is starting to feel like a responsibility or a chore, or I've got to do this, or I need to do this so that somebody else is happy, then like, you're just killing your arousal, right? (Lesley: Mm-hmm) If when sex becomes a chore, your arousal is just gonna continue to tank.Lesley Logan 33:04  Yeah, yeah. So for the people who are like, "I'm in, I love this. I'm in, I don't have time." The people who are like, they're so busy, they are... not ha... not, they don't have the time to have sex with their partner regularly or they... (Celeste: Yeah) Do you have advice for them? Is there like, quickies? (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Sure, yeah) Like, is that the only answer like what what can we give them to like, kind of take that excuse out? Because it's it's blocking them from from enjoying pleasure and having the sexual resilience?Celeste Holbrook 33:34  Yeah. Well, so first, I'll say there are times in your life where you have less sex, less sex, and that's okay. There's nothing wrong with that. But what I hear you saying is, is there somebody who wants to be having, you know, a little bit more sex or more pleasurable sex but feel like they can't, it's just not happening organically? Then here's what I would say. We are, we are told, from the very beginning that sex is natural, and it is not natural. It is biological. We're built for sex. We're built for pleasure, right? It's biological, it is not natural. Just like eating is biological. We're built to consume food, you still have to learn how to cook and make it a priority. (Lesley laughs) So so sex is just like this. If you wait until your partner and you are on the same page, in the soft glowing light, and you have had just enough food in your belly, and nobody has farts, you know, going on, like, you're gonna be waiting forever. If you're just waiting for that to naturally happen. And so I do not like scheduled sex. A lot of people say schedule sex, but I do like the premise of intentional sexuality. Meaning we're not just gonna say like, "Every Tuesday at four, we're gonna bang it out." That works for some people, and that's great if it does, but for some people, that feels a little bit too much like a responsibility, but if you just say, "We're just gonna leave it up to chance and hope that someday we're on the same page of arousal." That's also not great, because it's not going to happen. You have to make it a priority. So intentional sexuality looks like this, "Hey, Lesley, I know that we're both off work on Thursday, and we're both going to be home for lunch. What do you think about, you know, setting some time aside to get intentionally sexual?" And you're like, "Yeah, yeah, that sounds good. Like, I think we could do that." And then Thursday comes along, and I ate too many breadsticks. And I'm gonna, like, I've just got too much bloated belly, and I say, "Listen, I can't do it today. Like, let's pivot to something else." And so we can either pivot for to a one way situation where my partner just comes on my skin, or we can pivot to a different day, or we can pivot to something else, but you're making sex intentional, you're looking for those opportunities for you to be together in a vulnerable space and aroused. And if you do this intentionally, sex becomes a little easier, and you're talking about it. And it takes pressure off of just one person to always be initiating, and it takes pressure off of you to always, like, for example, this happens a lot for women. If you're going to bed, and you're like, either trying to avoid sex, or like, "Oh, I don't know, if I want to do it tonight. I'm going to act like I'm asleep." Or if you're, or if every time your partner reaches out to you and just an affectionate touch, and you're kind of moving away, like, "Oh, I don't want to get into sex right now." I would encourage you to make sex more intentional, because then you avoid that, like, weird middle ground of, "Is this a sexual touch or not? Are we going to have sex or not?" It just makes it more intentional, like, "Okay, Thursday, we're we have this time scheduled where we're going to, you know, be together." And if it doesn't work out, that's okay, we can pivot to something else. And that builds sexual resilience. So it's not, you know, every Thursday at noon, but it is, "Let's talk about when sex could be available for both of us. How can I help you get more aroused? What can I do during the day to help you feel more relaxed on Wednesday night? You know, can I can I take the kids pick the kids up from school? Can I you know, make sure that the house is picked up all you take a bath? Like what what are the things that we can do to make sex more intentional." So make sex, sex a priority, you do have time for it if you want to make time for it. But you have to not wait for the margin to just open up. (Lesley: Well...) Oh, my gosh, I'm sorry, that was so long. (Celeste laughs)Lesley Logan 37:23  No, it's okay because what I just want you just towards the end is like really, I love so much because it just goes back to like, it's two and the other person has to help make sure that you have less responsibility for that date, for that moment to happen. And so it requires a, those of you listening to speak up and say, "Here's what (Celeste: Yeah) we really lovely, if we could have intentional sex time, and then I would know that not every time are you kissing me, "are you trying to also..." (Celeste: Yeah) Because like, that is hard. If you're like, if you are thinking, "I have the 17 things that have to happen before five o'clock, otherwise, the whole house falls down." (Celeste: That's right) And then your partner goes to kiss you and you're like, "Oh my God, every time he kisses me, we have sex," then like you're not gonna and then that creates own other ball of (Celeste: Yeah) issues in your (Celeste: Yeah) relationship. So I love that. And I also love that you're like, it needs to be like, finding out what you need and telling your partner it would be really helpful if you could, if you pick the kids up from school on Wednesday that I'll have this and then we can actually I can be relaxed and I can have that time for you. I (Celeste: That's right) love it's just so much communication. And it's that is I mean to talk about modeling. No one communicates to us about sex. So we don't know how to communicate about sex. (Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 37:31  That's right. That's right. Let's examine your on the nose. That is exactly right.Lesley Logan 38:40  Um, okay. So Celeste you're I mean, you're just a wealth of knowledge. And I just I'm loving this conversation, but I want to talk about a couple things because you I always like to bring people on like, be it till you see it story. You are a mom of twins. (Celeste: Yes) So thank goodness again that you didn't listen to that doctor, because you would have had twins (Celeste laughs) possibly (Celeste: Yeah) and then probably not had been on this earth to give us all this beautiful sex education. (Celeste and Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 39:07  And I had them via C section by the way, so it wouldn't have helped. (Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 39:11  So his advice didn't like wouldn't have even worked for you. (Celeste: Yeah) Um, not the first time I've heard a doctor's advice around things like that for women. Um, that didn't go as planned. Can you tell us like about how you were doing a be it till you see it moment to have these twins because I do think it's really cool.Celeste Holbrook 39:29  Oh, thanks. I think this is like the coolest story. But I've always wanted twins. I don't have really twin twins that run in my family. But I just always been fascinated with twins. I'm a Gemini and so I think that's something to do with it. (Celeste and Lesley laughs) And I knew there was a slight more a bigger possibility slightly because my husband's mom is an identical twin and he has several twins in his family. Not that it typically comes from the dad's side but I was like, "Oh no, no, I could hope."Lesley Logan 39:59  Yeah, and also science like... (Celeste: Yeah) it could happen. (Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 40:03  It could happen. It could totally happen. So, um, you know, my twins are almost 10 now. So this was a long time ago, but I just when we started to try and get pregnant, I got off birth control, and we were just kind of being casual about it, you know, like not trying not to have sex or not to have get pregnant and took us about a year and I finally got pregnant and I was like, super excited. And I remember, you know, during my pregnancy, just like, "I just, it would be so lovely if I could have twins. I would just really want twins." And I thought about it every day. And I really, I really do feel like I manifested it. I remember pulling into the first OB appointment and going, "Today is the day I get to find out if I'm having twins or not." Like that was my thought it wasn't, "Today's the day I get to hear a heartbeat" or anything like that was like, "Today's a day, I get to find out if I'm having twins or not." And it was still a big surprise. I'm still so excited. But I'm telling you it is the biggest miracle of my life. And here's the last thing I'll say this is really funny is when the girls were five I was telling them the story like, "Girls do you know that you're the, my biggest miracle and I feel like God gave me you specifically and to be your mom and I manifested having twins as like, you know what? Twins are just like the biggest miracle of my life." And my five year old Zoey, she turns to me and goes, "Well, yeah, but like besides jeggings, right?" And I was like ... (Lesley and Celeste laughs) Okay whatever. (Lesley: Oh, my God. Oh, my God kids.) Jeggings, that was her big miracle. (Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 41:39  Oh, my God, she's she she's still a little fashionista, five years later?Celeste Holbrook 41:43  I mean... She loves her jeggings and when she's still rocking the jeggings, so who knows? Yeah. (Celeste and Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 41:50  This, I thank you for sharing that because I do, I think people can assume that the be it's till you see it's have to be something big. Have to, "Oh, not that having twins isn't a big deal." But (Celeste: Yeah, yeah) like has to be like something that like is in business, or it has to be like some sort of project. But it could actually just be like, "I'm going to be the mom of twins. And I'm going to act like these are twins in here. And I'm going to talk (Celeste: Yeah) like and they're gonna be twins." And then they were. (Lesley laughs)Celeste Holbrook 42:14  Yeah and then they were. It was wild. It's totally wild.Lesley Logan 42:17  Yeah. Um, so because you have two girls and they're identical twins. Is your, as a ... that you are raising them for sexual resilience? Is that is that easy for you to do? Because even though it wasn't modeled for you, or is that like something you're obviously intentional about? And is that something parents can do?Celeste Holbrook 42:38  Yes. Such a good question. So here's what I hope that I can say to help people feel more comfortable is that I talk about sex for a living. I made this my whole career. And I still find myself nervous to talk to my own kids about sex because it's just hard. It's a hard thing to do. You don't know if you're doing it right. You don't know if you're doing it well. But yes, I'm raising my kids very intentionally, about their body and about masturbation and about all things and and honestly, they can't really get away with it. They walk into my office, and there's, you know, some dildos hanging out. (Lesley laughs) So, you know, they'll go like, "Are you teaching about penis anatomy tonight?" And I'm like, "Yeah, I'm teaching about penis anatomy tonight." And it's just that I make it normal, right? We make, we make shame, by being ashamed. And so I really try very hard to make sex a normal part of our conversations, which is easier for me because I'm a sexologists. So the, when I talk about work, we're talking about sex. But I, my deepest hope is that they will feel free to make their own educated choices about sex.Lesley Logan 43:52  That's cool. (Celeste: Yeah) That's really cool. I, for whatever reason, I was imagining like, like the PTA, if, (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Oh) like, it goes well at the school. (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Yeah. Career, career day was a thing in kindergarten.) (Lesley and Celeste laughs) (Celeste: Yeah) Oh my gosh, that's so and you're in Texas, so no offense, but I do feel like that probably had (Celeste: Yeah) some interesting parents reactions.Celeste Holbrook 44:22  It's possible. Luckily, they have they have really cool parents in their classroom. But listen, I'm like, you know, what, if my kids are gonna say something that brings up sex at to your house, into your home, you're welcome. (Celeste laughs) Like, man up and be an adult and talk about it. (Lesley: Yeah) I'm very, like, I feel very strongly about this. Like, you got to talk to your kids about sex.Lesley Logan 44:41  I think so. I think that is the biggest mistake that that that parents can make is like, not actually explaining it to them and or then making them feel that responsibility or shame around it. And like, (Celeste: Yeah) you know, I think it's because whatever their parents said, and their parents said, it's just like, it's just the worst game of telephone we've all played. And (Celeste and Lesley laughs) you know, it just gets like watered down more (Celeste: Yeah) confused like or not there at all. So, you know, Celeste, I'm just so grateful that we can have this conversation. Thank you for saying yes when I asked you. I'm a complete stranger to you. So I really appreciate it. (Celeste: Oh, absolutely.) Because like, I really do, I, the more I talk with women and as a Pilates instructor and I work with women, and, you know, I hear mostly about the struggles for their fertility. (Celeste: Mm-hmm) But also part of those conversations has to do just with sex and confidence in the bedroom. And it's like, if you're not confident there, like it really is hard to be confident, as you mentioned anywhere else. And like, that might just be the one place we can all start exploring this year. So I'm grateful. Alright, Celeste, where do people get to find you? Are you on Instagram? Is our website like, where do they get to talk to you more?Celeste Holbrook 45:52  Yes, you can find me on my website. It's Dr. Celeste Holbrook, d r and then my name is celesteholbrook.com. And you can find me at the same handle on Instagram and Facebook - Dr. Celeste Holbrook. I really want to make you laugh on Instagram. So please come on over (Lesley and Celeste laughs) and see my ridiculous reels that I use with sex toys. (Lesley laughs) So yeah, absolutely.Lesley Logan 46:13  Oh, my God, that's amazing. I'm just so grateful for this conversation. I really do. If you're, if any of this peaked your interest, like, please, you call, go to Celeste. If you, I would love it if you feel super comfortable screenshotting this and taking a picture and tagging Dr. Celeste Holbrook and the @be_it_pod with your takeaways because we could all start making this less this weird thing that no one talks about if we can just post about it on Instagram. (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Yeah) Right? (Celeste: Absolutely. It's a powerful tool.) What a great little be it... (Celeste: Yeah) First action and having a conversation and less shame around this con... this topic. Okay, I asked everyone, because it's one thing to be informed and to get educated or even be inspired. But, you know, what are some tips that people can take away and work on for themselves to be it till they see it in this area? So bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps? What do you, what do you think would you have for us?Celeste Holbrook 47:08  So, I really like the idea of writing down what you want to feel. And if you're not feeling pleasure, if you're not feeling connected, writing those things down and talking about it with your partner, have them write down what they want to feel in sex, too, can be really just the starting point for sex getting better. So really writing down what you want to feel and will help you, you know, be it until you see it, will help you kind of get closer to feeling those things for sure. That's that's kind of once it's it feels like a small thing, but it really does change the way that you think about sex.Lesley Logan 47:50  I mean, I think it's like, this is just be something that's like, in all like before you get married, like these are some things, before your partner, before you even like have sex with someone. Like instead of just saying "yes," like, it should be like, and the next question is, "How do you want to feel tonight?" (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Yes, exactly.) Like it just (Celeste: Totally) I mean, like, you know, it's like, like, you know, after we say "Hi," we say, "How are you?" Could be like, "Would you like have sex? Yes. "And how would you like to feel?" Like that (Celeste: Yeah) could just be like the the new routine in (Celeste: I love it) how we speak. Oh my gosh, I love this so much. And it ... you, I know it's you said it sounds simple. It's not like it's (Mm-hmm) like that requires a people knowing how they want to feel, which is like another so that just is a domino chain if you don't rewind and listen. (Lesley laughs) (Celeste: Yeah) Because we talked about that, but also like, I mean like what a unique thing you could be exploring instead of like, trying to like, I can't think of a better thing to spend time getting to know except for yourself and like what pleases you and like what makes you feel whole and seen? And you know, and that's, and like you said, like, if you can do it, they're in the most vulnerable state then what else you could do everything like you're unstoppable.Celeste Holbrook 48:57  You can do anything. I love it, unstoppable. Absolutely, (Lesley laughs) absolutely.Lesley Logan 49:02  Celeste, you're making unstoppable humans all over. And I'm so appreciative you. Thank you for being here. Everyone, thank you for listening. And I'm serious, like... take a screenshot of this, tag us and your takeaway, because it could be the best way to change this conversation around this. And if you're like, "Lesley, that is like the biggest step of my life." Then please text it to a friend who needs to hear this. Like, "Ladies, I know you know how your friends are feeling or you've heard like between the lines of how they're feeling, send them this like if you don't want to give them the advice yourself. You can just send them and Celeste's words can tell them. (Lesley and Celeste laughs) (Celeste: I love it.) So thank you for being here. Everyone, thanks for listening. Until next time, Be It Till You See It.That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell 50:14  It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our associate producer is Amanda Frattarelli.Lesley Logan 50:25  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.Brad Crowell 50:29  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 50:38  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.Brad Crowell 50:50  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Amber Shaw is the Founder of the Wellness Revolution, a leading global movement for thousands of women to empower them to rediscover their confidence and create a body that looks as good as they feel. As a Nationally Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach and Certified Personal Trainer, Amber is committed to overhauling the diet culture so women have the support and accountability they need to change their lives. In this episode, Amber and I chat about how to get away from extreme behaviors when it comes to diet and exercise. Amber shares simple, actionable steps to help you get off the 'dieting crazy train.' If you've struggled with restrictive diets or over-exercise, this episode is for you! You can connect with Amber on IG @msambershaw or ambershaw.com Does this resonate with you? 1:1 coaching can help you ditch the restrictive diets and find a healthy way to approach your lifestyle. We are currently taking applications. Apply below! https://carrotsncake.lpages.co/coaching/ ***** If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a review and subscribe so you never have to miss an episode! Comments and questions can be sent to info@carrotsncake.com. Follow me on Instagram @carrotsncake Subscribe for the latest updates and free resources: https://carrotsncake.ck.page/free If you're looking for a health-minded group of women who want to support and lift you up as you work toward your goals, please consider joining the CNC Lifestyle: https://programs.carrotsncake.com/lifestyle Grab my macro cookbook on Amazon! https://rstyle.me/+UGeGlgcWbVZdkcObYJIfBQ

How can pain become a power tool? How can the experiences that create resistance lead to transformation? Lena takes listeners through the BEING method and tips to becoming more mindful everyday. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Knowing your passion, but waiting to know how to apply the passionYour souls purpose is not a coincidencePain is a teaching tool, suffering is optionalProcessing the pain to transform yourselfThe BEING Method : Being aware of your thoughts & Enlightenment comes through awareness Cultivating a more mindful present life with intentionsThe fear of power and owning your own powerThe Three A's: Acknowledge, Accept, Alternative ActionEpisode References/Links:Lena's WebsiteThe East InstituteLena's InstagramEAST InstagramGuest Bio:Lena Franklin is a Modern Medicine Woman, Transpersonal Psychotherapist, and Transformational Speaker, offering the ancient practices of meditation, energy medicine and psycho-spiritual healing in an accessible way for a modern lifestyle. Formally trained with a Bachelor of Science in Psychology and a Master of Science in Social Work, Lena is dedicated to guiding others on a journey of embodied purpose, presence and liberated wholeness.Lena has taught transformational workshops and retreats all over the globe, guiding thousands to transform their suffering into strength by accessing their multi-dimensional existence. Raised in a hybrid Buddhist/Christian home, Lena was introduced to meditation as a young child and now integrates Eastern philosophy with Western neuroscience in her healing and teaching work.Lena is the co-founder of The East Institute, a global organization that exists to support the healing and awakening of humanity and the planet through ancient embodied practices, plant medicines and cutting-edge science.Lena is also the creator of The BEING Method ~ a systematic method for igniting your highest human potential through meditation and The Meditation Membership ~ a global community for awakening where members receive weekly meditations and transformational teachings transmitted by Lena.Lena has been featured on Bravo, Lifetime, the cover of Yoga Magazine, and in The NY Times, Telegraph, World Travel Magazine and more. Visit her website to learn more about her practice and schedule of meditation journeys, transformative workshops, corporate and continuing education offerings: www.lenafranklin.com  OPC Flashcards:OPC Flashcards are on AmazonOPC Flashcards are on our site  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.  ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Social MediaInstagramFacebookTik TokLinkedIn Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Hey, Be It listener, how are you? Ah, okay, I can not wait for you to hear this episode. So I am going to try not to ramble because I just want to get into it because Lena Franklin is just, she's amazing. Like, here, a woman who's just so in touch with her, her purpose on this planet. And there's something about being around people like that, that makes it so much easier to step into your own power and awesomeness. And we talk a lot about stepping into your power and the fear we can have there. And I just share this with you. Because here's why, I didn't grow up with people around me who were doing things that I wanted to be doing. I didn't, I didn't know a lot of people who were being their true selves and unapologetically being that I didn't know a lot of people who weren't being in their eat, like working with their ego. I didn't know a lot of entrepreneurs, I didn't that this didn't happen. I didn't see that. And so I can, I understand if you're someone who is walking through this life and just going, it must be so easy for them. Because it wasn't I don't, I don't know that I don't recognize that. And I say this to you because what I did is, was scary. It was really hard. I felt like an imposter all the time. But I constantly tried to seek out people who were doing or had done the things I wanted to be doing. I kept seeking out those relationships. And here's the thing, every single one of us has a gift. And so what I learned in doing that, and putting myself in rooms and putting myself in conversations, putting myself in places with people who had a quality or a skill or had done something I wished I had. I had some that they wanted, because we all have amazing gifts. And I say that to you because this this new year it can be anything you want it to be and if you're listening to this, and another year, this day can be anything you want it to be and I can't wait for you to listen to her be it tips because she'll explain how you can do that. Because I don't I know I say that people go, "yeah, right Leslie like today's a bad day for me." But like get to the end of this podcast cuz you're gonna freakin love that you can. You have every day to have an opportunity to step into the person you want to be actually multiple moments in each day. And Being It Till You See It is not like a light switch. "I'll just turn it on, and now we're it." And it's not that it's going to be easy, everyday. Some days, it's going to be easy to Be It Till You See It and other days. It's gonna be like "what in the world I don't know what I'm doing. I'm scared. I'm afraid I'm tired. I'm freakin exhausted. Hello, like I can't be it today." But it's a practice. Everything we're doing is a practice and it's about the reps. And, and I just challenge you to keep listening. And keep Being It Till You See It and take those tiny action steps each day because they add up they add up it's like a snowball effect. So I love you. I'm so grateful for you. Thank you for listening to this podcast. Thank you for sharing it. You you need to know that every single download you do is a massive impact on so many others because every single download you have actually helps other people find this podcast every time you share this podcast, whether you text it, tweet it, Instagram at all those things. It is how people's lives get changed and if we're all Being It Till we See It doesn't make it easier for you? Right? It does. So thank you for being you. And after this quick message, Lena Franklin...Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Alright Be It listener, what's up! Okay, so I'm so excited for today because I was listening to this amazing woman, when you hear voice, you're just gonna be like, "Okay, I could just listen to for hours." But I was listening to her while on my holiday vacation and she was talking with my dear friend Amber Shaw, we've had on the podcast so if you haven't listened to that when you go back. But I was I found myself talking to the two of you on the podcast and I wasn't not involved in the conversation. So I was like I just have to have her on so we ...(Lesley laughs) so I'm so excited to have you on here Lena that this is amazing. Can you please tell everyone who you are? What you're rocking like what you're doing in this world? Because it's beautiful.Lena Franklin 4:56  Mmhm, Thank you Lesley. I'm so grateful to be here. with you. So I'm Lena Franklin. I'm a modern medicine woman. I'm a transpersonal, psychotherapist, and transformational speaker. And my work is really all about sharing ancient eastern practices and ancient healing approaches, modalities here in the modern world in an accessible way for anybody to really optimize their human embodiment, to really be the best, most expansive versions of themselves. And I am honored to do this work. So I actually learned meditation originally, when I was a young child, my mom taught me meditation because I grew up in a Buddhist Christian home. So my whole life's journey has been this kind of interesting integration of East and West. Lesley Logan 5:51  That okay, so first of all, that is an incredible, interesting childhood to grow up with, and I think (Lena: yea) it's so amazing how things set us up. But I, you know, I, as I mentioned earlier, before we start recording, but also our listeners have heard like, Brad and I go to Cambodia a lot. And there's something when you go to a place where they practice these eastern practices, like really practice them. You can be you can come and be stressed out. And then that plane lands, it's like, you you're going to get ground. They're grounding you. Like it's happening. And you can go with it, or you can fight it. But I remember when I landed there, we got in the, in the tuck, tuck, and I was like, "Babe, My soul is home". And he goes, we haven't even it's dark. It's 10pm. We haven't seen anything. And I was like, "No, I feel so at peace right now." And then you go and you like, we're so great when they teach us a few things on, on honoring the Buddha and the temples, but also, like, just sitting still, and it is so it's so it sounds so common sense to sit still. But like it's so hard for us here to do that. (Lena: uhhu) And so I think it is so cool that you grew up with both of those as parents and your life. Because I think you can relate to people so well, because I mean, if you I was raised Christian, but even if you're not like just being in that Western society with one pair, and then having the Eastern practices from the other, like, you can actually like translate it really well.Lena Franklin 7:14  Totally, totally. I mean, it was so interesting. My dad's Christian, he is Presbyterian. And it's... we need I feel these eastern practices now more than ever, because of the the state of the world. And just it kind of feels like we're living in a pressure cooker. But yeah, I grew up witnessing my mom sit at our ancestral altar and light incense and all the rituals. And you know, when something horrific or painful was going on in the world, she would make us as kids sit in silence and tune into the compassionate heart, the energy that flows through our heart in really sharing it with the world in this intentional way. So, you know, at the time, I thought it was kind of strange, obviously, weird, like "mom's being weird. And her monk robe again doing, doing her, all her little woowoo spiritual things." But it planted these incredible, just powerful seeds within me, that didn't blossom until much later in my life.Lesley Logan 8:18  And I want to talk about that. Because like, I can imagine as a child, you're like, but none of my friends moms do this. Like my friend's mom, something bad happens. And they're like, probably panicked, like, and you think that that's the normal thing to do? Like, Mom, why aren't you doing this? And so, did you? Did you grow up knowing you were going to go into teaching this? Or did you kind of like, wind your way and come back around?Lena Franklin 8:42  Yeah, that's a great question. So I did not know as a child that I was going to be teaching this, but my mom did. So she would say things like, you're meant to bring people back to my homeland. So my mom was from Vietnam. Okay. So that's, that's where my maternal lineage is from. And I'd be like, "okay, Mom," you know, I have no idea what you're talking about. But just, she had that mystical, kind of healer energy, but because we were in a very conventional Western, you know, society in town. It wasn't fully acknowledged it wasn't fully honored. And so I didn't really realize the gift she was sharing with me at the time. But, you know, as I continued to, to evolve on my own path, I realized, you know, people will just gravitate towards me naturally. Not school, when when friends would be having issues or problems or you needed some support emotionally. I was naturally the person they would gravitate towards. So eventually, I realized I was meant to help other humans. I just didn't know exactly what that looked like.Lesley Logan 9:47  Yeah. So how, because I, I mean, I don't know. I don't want to like insert my life, but I think of like, I had no idea what that heck I was gonna be. So (Lena: yeah) like, and so as your as you're doing this, like, how, how did you go from like, "Okay, people are coming to me." And then to where you are today, which is you teach people like you're a life coach and you teach all these practices like, what was that shift? And then? And was it easy for you? Like, you're like, Oh, this is natural for me like, of course I'm doing this or did you feel like you had to work towards it in any way?Lena Franklin 10:23  Yeah. So most of my childhood life, like, even through high school and into college was very focused on physicality. I was a high level athlete, I played soccer, I got a full ride to play soccer at the University of Georgia. So it's all about physicality, competition, sports. And what, what really changed the trajectory of my life, Lesley was, was really my own pain and suffering. My mom actually suddenly passed when I was in my first year of grad school. So actually, you know, at that point, I knew I was meant to help people. I was in grad school for social work. So I was getting my master's in social work. And she suddenly, you know, died of a stroke healthy, you know, didn't have any any health conditions, but just had a sudden stroke one day literally I had talked to her earlier that day, she had been to a friend's horse farm and had the most beautiful, joyful day. And she had a stroke that evening, and was in a coma for a few days until we could see her and then she transitioned. So it was really through my experience of grief and loss and pain, that I fully committed to my yoga and meditation practice. And that's, that's what sent me on this trajectory, I realized, you know, sitting like you said, sitting still, it was more healing than the traditional therapy I was in at the time, because I could see myself in a way I'd never seen myself before, I was so much more expansive than the pain I was experiencing was almost like I was having this existential experience through the pain I was experiencing. And my mom, in that moment of her transition, she became a spiritual teacher in soul form, outside of, you know, human form. And so it was our souls contract together, you know, she was she was meant to transition when she did. And that's what sent me on my journey of helping, you know, so many other humans on their pathLesley Logan 12:31  That is so powerful, because I think so many people like, of course, my instinct is to say, I'm so sorry, because that is a terrible, tragic thing to lose that someone who's such a person in your life, such as support, but then also for that to be the reason why you are, who you are and doing what you're doing. It's almost like, if that didn't happen, how would we get how would you get here, you know?Lena Franklin 12:55  Exactly. It's like, you know, what you see in the Buddhist temples, the mandalas, and all of the, like, everything is shifting in divine sequence. And that was what was meant to happen, like a domino effect to set me on this, this path of really living out my soul's purpose in this particular lifetime. And then now, it's no coincidence that a big part of my work is teaching people how to alchemize and transform their pain and suffering into their greatest strength because those resistance points are really access points into our deeper healing and transformation.Lesley Logan 13:35  Okay, thank you for bringing that up. Because I was like, "How do I get the listener at home? who's like, okay, Lesley, that's great. She was set up her mom totally trained her set her up for this, it was, but that didn't happen for me. Like, that's not how like mine was so..." Like, how, how do you like, what is the thing that you can use to get people that you use to help people see that this great pain is actually their greatest default resource? Or? (Leana: Yeah), yeah. Like what? I don't know. I don't know if you can answer that. But like, do you know what I mean, like, how do what how do you tell someone who's sitting there and pain and suffering like this is actually going to be the greatest thing that ever happened for you?Lena Franklin 14:13  You know, it's important for someone to get that message. But they're not actually going to see the fruits of their pain until the fog subsides a bit. So it's what I would say to those listening because as humans none of us are exempt from pain and suffering. I mean, our the pain is inevitable suffering is optional, because the suffering is us fighting with ourselves not wanting to feel this present moment experience. So in that, whatever you're experiencing right now, whatever challenge, painful situation, piece of suffering. The most important question that you can ask yourself is, "what is this pain trying to teach me"? And if we If we think about that, like that everything is working in support of our evolution, even the most dark, painful moments, then we can flip the perspective and transform our lens to receive life in this much more easeful way, because of we're here on this planet, and we're going to feel challenging moments, then why not transform them into our greatest lessons, because that's actually why we're all here. So it's, it's trusting something that is beyond you, it's trusting the, that you're supported, and that you're loved, despite the pain that you're going through. And it's also I think, this is a really important piece, it's like getting out of our own way, releasing that victimhood that you know, we all actually possess during our life at some point. And then when we go through our deep healing, we can transform it, but this is not happening to you, it's happening for you. And that universal truth is so key. In all of this. Lesley Logan 16:02  You know, it is so key. And it's, I think it's like, I wish people I wish, like when you're young, and it's like I wish my parents had said, this is happening for you, you know, as opposed to not say anything at all, because having to unlearn that victim stuff. And some for some people, a victim mentality gets them attention. And so then they learn behaviors. Now, this is the thing that they're keeping. And so like, I think I would be the first one to say like, I have a really I have a hard time meditating, like, sitting still, (Lena: yep) like, yoga practices. Like, I finally found a teacher who talks the whole time I'm like, thank you so much. Like, please, my chatter is you got to talk over this. So. So I that's why I like found myself with breathwork. Because I really, when you talked about that expansiveness, you're like, I have felt that and like until you feel it, it's kind of like, what are they talking about these people? Right? But it is, it is a breath. That is a way I've been able to meditate. So how do how do you help the person who's like, "Okay, ladies, I'm hearing this. I've heard it many times. I'm ready to buy in. How do I sit? Still? How do I do this? Like, do you have tips for that?"Lena Franklin 17:10  Yeah, so okay, what I'll say is some, okay, we only use such a small part of our, percentage of our human brain, you know, like, 3% something very, very small. So much is happening within your consciousness within your body, beyond your human awareness. Every time you sit so many times, and I tell this to my meditation students all the time is a successful meditation is sitting still, from the first bell when the first bell rings, to when the last bell rings, it's a commitment to stillness, even if you're not perceiving anything, we'll say expansive happening. So for someone who's like, okay, that's, that's great, but like, I, when am I going to feel the benefit? It will come, you know, it's like, trusting this process that is deeper and more multi dimensional than what you can even perceive. So as humans, we know so little part of this is like just admitting, like we know so little. And going back to the basics is one of the most powerful things we can do. Connect to your breath, breathe deeply into your belly, sit still. Listen to your inner self, and cultivate the greatest relationship you'll ever have, which is the relationship you have with your soul. And I promise you, if you commit to that every day, you will begin to feel different, and you will begin to deepen and expand and transform yourself.Lesley Logan 18:47  Yeah, I mean, I, you are correct. And it's interesting. I was telling someone earlier today on another person's podcast asked me like, how did you even get into Pilates and I said, "It's the weirdest thing. I really didn't think I was gonna love it. I really thought this is gonna be this dumb thing." And I went, and in one moment, for the first time, even though I was moving, I wasn't sitting, I was doing the 100. But my brain and my body like had this like, it's like they saw each other for the first time and like, I felt parts of my body I never felt and I, I that that led me to be able to sit still from at least one belt to another, but it's the practice of it, right? It's like trusting like, Okay, I wasn't really good at this today. But I got down on the ground and that I do it again. And I do like it's your give. I giving my body confidence that I can do this. And so when I started doing breath work and mindfulness trainings, I was like, "Okay, I'm not going to be great. I'm gonna be a beginner at this." And I'm not, I'm not going to have the expanse of things because just like when I was beginner Pilates, I couldn't do the roll up. But you you do get there and it is this interesting thing because your brain is eventually going to once you get past like sitting still from bell to bell and going okay, so nothing crazy happened. I just sat here and like, nothing bad happened either the ceiling didn't fall in the world didn't float, I think that's another thing that people have to get used to is like, it's gonna be okay. (Lena: Yeah) If I just sit here for this amount of time. So you know, you you work with so many people and and you do some really awesome work and just helping people. I was listening to Amber's relationship with you and like what you've helped or do. And is there a framework or a system that you like to use with people? Is there something that you do that really helps people kind of step into their own power? Like, what is that something that you work with?Lena Franklin 20:35  I do, I would say, you know, one of my specialties and parts of my purpose really involve coaching and stepping people into the fullest expression of who they're meant to be. So in essence, like their daring, authentic power, and one of the portals into that is meditation, because that's, you know, that's a way that we intimately know or get to know ourselves. So there's a method that literally came through me one morning in meditation, and I have a, we have a meditation temple here at the house, and I was sitting there and you know, it's like, amazing, when you do open up and you become a clear channel, what, what moves through, because you actually have the space to hear it and to listen. So it's, um, it's called the Being Method. And it's a way that we can work with our in our life, our emotions, our thoughts, in order to kind of what I call like, clear the space and to embody this authentic power that exists has always existed within us, but maybe has been tamped down by different thoughts, belief systems, different dense energies. So kind of briefly, I can move through it, (Lesley: Yeah) that was the Being Method and it's really helpful, you can use it outside of traditional meditation. So the B of being is become aware of your thoughts, you know, becoming aware of what's moving through your mind, we can't hear what we're not aware of. So what are the default modes of thinking that you experience on a day to day basis, because you have to begin identifying that so I teach a lot of kind of conscious mindful journaling, as people are on unveiling deeper layers of awareness. So become aware of your thought process. What are you thinking in a pattern way. The E is Enlightenment begins at the moment of your awareness. So I like this one because we think enlightenment is something outside of ourselves, something that is so far away that only Jesus, Buddha, other Ascended Masters were able to experience. No, the moment that you become aware of something that's in your consciousness is a moment of enlightenment. So we can have many moments of enlightenment throughout our day. So when you're becoming aware, it's you. Yes, you are in an active process of transforming yourself and healing yourself and you become aware. So it's like to me that that one gives a lot of hope.Lesley Logan 23:03  Cool, because yeah, we know you said enlightenment, I'm like, "Okay, I know, I don't know, that's like Navanna, that's like your floating on clouds." You're like, no, actually, won't you just became aware, like, enlightened? I'm like, "oop, I'm in."Lena Franklin 23:18  Yeah, I mean, and we can enlighten ourselves all day long, because we can become aware all day long. So I think that's a really important distinction, for you know, for for anybody, you know, in this realm, who wants to really cultivate a more mindful present life. Yeah. So the I is to ignite intention, you know, being so committed to what you want to call into your life, how you want to live, how you want to feel, and committing to that every day through thoughts and action. So what is your intention? What are you going to ignite in your life, for me this year is all about expansion and expansion, unapologetically in all ways. So my thoughts, my words, my actions are going to align with that intention. So being getting very clear, and of course, our intention shifts over time, you know, one month or one year, some intention may serve us but giving ourselves permission to allow that intention to, to evolve as we evolve. So, the end is all about non attachment, which is, you know, is actually a very traditional Buddhist psychology tenant. So and it can be one of the most challenging steps because when we desire something, we have an attachment to the outcome. But as much as you can, when you set your intention, and you commit to align to action, if you can release, you know, align with the energy of release, releasing that intention into the universe, to unfold in its own timeline, than that is key to creating the inner and outer life that you deeply desire. So that non attachment piece because your Higher Self operates from non attachment, it's your ego that operates from attachment.Lesley Logan 25:08  So that makes me think of just really quick side note, we had a guest, her name is Hazel, and she talked about miracle goals. And like, like not just going, oh, I want to have a house. She's like, I want to have a pimp mansion. I want movies and music videos, a film, I want to have big parties, right? She had no money, like, none. And then she's like, and but she's like, I'm gonna have this, I believe it. I have that intention. And then she like, did the first little tiny step. Right. And then nine months later, she's freaking in this mansion there. Yeah. But like, I when you say that, like I because I'm in a process of like a really big goal. And I'm like, I am really that's one I struggle with. Because it's like, I have to take the action every day. And so like not letting the action taking get attached to the you know what I mean? Like, it's like, because you got to do the things that some...you know ...(Lesley laughs) So that's a challenge.Lena Franklin 26:05  It is a challenge. Yeah. And so that's why it's a practice you you work with it every day, you set the intention, you make the aligned action. And then I love and this is a very kind of shamanic practice, but literally breathing, using your hands out from your mouth, from your body, and really aligning so deeply with that non attachment piece, that release piece, it actually creates a swifter result. It feels counterintuitive, but it creates a swifter result.Lesley Logan 26:34  I love that. I'm doing. Yeah, I'm borrowing that. Thank you so much ...(Lesley laughs)Lena Franklin 26:38  You're welcome. And then the last step is, is just what naturally happens, growth naturally happens when you practice the steps before in the Being Method. Your true nature is expansive evolution, your true nature is power, its success, its abundance. We're simply getting out of our own way, by working with our thoughts and reprogramming what's not in alignment with what we deeply desire. So the Being Method to me is, is such an accessible way to do some of this work.Lesley Logan 27:13  Okay, this is beautiful. I mean, I couldn't think of like it, that's a great way to be until you see it, because it's like, become aware of your thoughts. Yes, enlightenment, which have awareness, and then, and then you keep going through it. And I just What I also like about it, thank you for making remind people to practice because I do think that everything really is, isn't it? And we get hung up on, I didn't do it right. Today. I didn't do it. Oh, that's not working. And it's like, no, actually, that's part of practice, like, you're gonna stumble, you're gonna make mistakes, you can make tweaks and you're going to realize, "Oh, I'm totally attached today, I'm really attached. And now I'm aware of that thought." And, you know, so I think this is really helpful, because I do think you said fullest expression of ourselves. And I, I find that a lot of people struggle with, with either trusting that that's a possibility for them or being comfortable with that.Lena Franklin 28:10  Yes, yeah, I believe that, you know, one of the things that we're most fearful of is our power. It's really our power. And that's, that's where we carry so much resistance is like in that metamorphosis expansion, because all of our, all of those old, outdated belief systems get triggered, you know, "who am I to fill in the blank". And that's where I think we can't practice these things without compassion, self compassion, because we are imperfectly perfect humans, we're gonna falter, we're gonna make mistakes, we're gonna have heavy days. But this if we treat our whole life, like as its own living meditation, that our whole life is a practice, I think we can have more grace with ourselves. But this, you know, it's not, it's not easy. These practices may be simple, like, some of the concepts are simple, but they're not always easy to implement.Lesley Logan 29:07  Isn't that the truth simple is rarely easy. I, I'm so grateful we're having this conversation. Because it's like my first like, my second day back in my office, and I. And, you know, we're doing a big scary thing tomorrow, like I'm, we're, I've been wanting to expand on one of our companies big time, and I had to get away of like, the attention of when that was going to happen, because like, I wasn't seeing the growth that I needed to see. And so I was like, trying to like, control that growth. And I was finally like, okay, we're just going to pick a date. Where we're going to bring on these new teachers into the program because I do believe that if everyone has a Pilates practice, even a 15 minute one, they get connected to themselves. They connect to themselves and connect more to others, right? And they're practicing doing hard things through movement. So if you can't do it that day, how you talk to yourself on the mat is information for you. If you can't do it, but you pick something else, you just told yourself, I can do hard things I can find another way I can do this stuff. And so we're constantly reminding them. But I needed to have other people, other voices, because not everyone can hear mine. Not everyone's gonna understand the words that I use versus someone else's. And I've been scared to death because I'm like, of course, there's that ego. But what if no one likes him? What if people don't like that? What if this and this all this stuff. And I'm like, okay, hold on. We were feeling so good about this yesterday. You know, and so it's like, knowing that, you know, it's, it's not, it's not like when you get that enlightenment on that one Awareness Day, it's not the end, it's like, tomorrow's a new day. And there's a new thought later on and, and just being kind to yourself, and I love that you talk about grace, it's like, it's really not easy to work on this, but it gets easier, the more you do it.Lena Franklin 30:53  Totally, totally, it's almost like, like the client I had right before I jumped on with you. We've talked about this being her spiritual training, you know, like, training. Whether you're training your mind, your soul, your body, you're going to go through resistance, you're going to have sore muscles, you're going to feel creaky sometimes. But it's pushing through that resistance in order to discover a power that maybe you haven't tapped into yet. That's why I think I love what you do, because it's, it's all integrated. This mind, body, soul existence, whatever the access point is, it's all very, you know, can be a lesson that we take in every domain of our life.Lesley Logan 31:37  So I want to thank you, I, and I think it's like, you know, whatever gets you in, like, you start to get on the journey, right? So I want to go back to the afraid of our power. Because I do think like a lot of people here like often, like, because the reason I named this Be It Till You See It is because people ask me all the time, like, "how are you so confident?" I'm like, I'm freakin scared. I'm scared to death. I'm scared. People aren't gonna like me. I'm like, literally afraid of what people are gonna say. So I just Be It. I'm like, "well, if I wasn't scared, if I didn't care what people thought what would I do"? But I, I think a lot of people nod and go, yes. And then there's that fear. A lot of people don't talk about but that fear of the power of like, what they're capable of? And? And is that that because of the learn behaviors as a child? Or is it that we just haven't seen a lot of good people step into there? Like, what, what is that? Why are we so afraid of that?Lena Franklin 32:29  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah... so it's a big piece of it, I would say the predominant piece is the ego, the individual ego, but also the collective ego, because we, the ego thrives on fear, and are the systems and you know, so much in society is thrives on fear. And a lot of the well meaning, you know, not always but but generally well meaning parents that we've had, they try to teach us things, but a lot of the lessons a lot of the belief systems are based in fear, you know, and some rightly so to try to keep us safe. But when we then are on this path will say, you know, spiritual growth or personal development, trying to be the fullest expression of who we're meant to be. Those outdated, I call them viral systems that we've been programmed with get activated, because our ego is the one that continues to keep us small to keep us in the, what I call the illusion of safety, not actual safety. And so inevitably, in order to embody your, your authentic power, we have to be willing to do the shadow work of unpacking, what are the belief systems that are still entrenched in my fear based ego? But I think a lot of it is conditioned, is programmed. (Lesley: Yeah) Throughout our life. Lesley Logan 33:58  Yeah. No, it's your so correct. Because I, I had an accountability coach from a program I did. And I was telling them what I was worried about. It's like, three years ago, I just started the company. And I was like, "well, I'm so afraid, because like, if my pl... my platform gets really big, then my friends who own their platform when they get mad at me, because I'm not trying to take their people." And she's like, and I heard myself say it right. I said it out loud. Yeah. Which is always interesting. And then she's like, "you have such a fear of success". And I was like, who would have a fear of success? Like, right, that sounds so dumb, but like it as you say, like a fear of our own power, it that's it. Right, like, because why? You know, like, for whatever reason I was I had this belief that I like I bragged, or I did better than other people wouldn't be able to do but who knows what that came from. But as you say that I'm thinking like, how interesting it kind of correlates. It's like, if you haven't seen it, if you haven't seen that around you or if you if for whatever reason you were told, like "hey, don't you'll hurt people's feelings. If you talk about the good things that you're doing." You know, that's bragging. Like, we, we do get that and then the ego is keeping us safe. Because it's like, well, don't do that cuz you're gonna get hurt, like you're going to hurt someone like all that stuff. And it's so interesting because we don't even know it until like we're going through life. And then it gets it causes issues, it causes friction, it causes us frustration in us and, and so it's just it's so fascinating, but I'm just going to this thing and I'm like, oh my god, it's such a, like, as I say, who have a fear of their own power. I'm like, Well, I have such as fear of success that I have to call it all that like, "oop, this is my fear of success talking". Lena Franklin 35:31  Totaly, and I know it's so interesting, because our, our initial response is like, who would be afraid of that? Like, who would be afraid of success or expansion or power or whatever. But when you really unpack it, it's like, oh, yeah, that's like a deep part of our core, you know, growth area is owning is owning our true power. Because true authentic power has nothing to prove. You know, and I'm sure you've, you've because you've interviewed so many amazing people. It's like when you're in the midst of that, of someone's presence, that that embodies that, there's like this lack of striving or just lack of pushing, it's like, they just are because they know their worth, and they love themselves. Deeply.Lesley Logan 36:14  Yeah, it's your that is so true. Like I would, I remember in my, like, major hustle days, not the fun hustle, not the like hustle that kind of has to like, come like you have to do a little bit of work. But like in the striving, like, I just got to push this boulder up a mountain, I would look at some of these people that I like, admired so much. I'm like, they just look like this. They just make it look like they're at ease. Like they are like, like, so chill. And it's. And it's, I thought maybe it comes with time or practice. But I the more I dive into this and like listening to you, it's like, no, they just start getting that ego out of the way more often than not ...(Lesley laughs)Lena Franklin 36:51  Corect, yeah, exactly. Exactly. It's like, okay, we don't want to demonize the ego, we just want to soften it enough. So our true authentic self empower can shine through.Lesley Logan 37:02  Oh, my gosh, girl, I could talk. I feel like I could talk for hours. I'm like, how do we just.(Lena: I agree) Like, when do I get, how do I get to work with you more? Okay, so where do you like to hang out? How do people get to work with you? Lena Franklin 37:14  Okay, so you can check out more of my work on my website, lenafranklin.com l e n a franklin.com And also, my husband and I just launched the East Institute, which is a learning institute that embodies ancient healing modalities. And we support people and work with people through the East Institute as well. And that's the EastInstitute.com and (Lesley: oh that's so cool). Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's, um, it's been amazing. It's a global organization, that really, we think of ourselves as a bridge between East and West, and really bringing ancient practices to the West in a really accessible way. So check it out.Lesley Logan 37:58  Oh my gosh, I'm going to also anytime I hear someone works with her husband, I'm like, Oh, hi, me, too. (Lesley laughs)Lena Franklin 38:04  Yeah, I love that we have that parallel. Because it's, yeah, anyhow, that's a whole another conversation. (Lena laughs)Lesley Logan 38:09  Yeah, yeah well, someday we can go. This is how you work with your husband.Lena Franklin 38:14  This is how you work with your husband and survive. Yeah.Lesley Logan 38:19  Well, amazing. Everyone, check out Lena Franklin on Instagram and the East Institute. Before I let you go. I mean, you've given us so many great tips that Being I'm gonna like, put on my wall. But any other bold, executable intrinsic or targeted tips that people can take away and take some action on in their life from this conversation.Lena Franklin 38:41  Yeah, there's a call like a mindset mindfulness hack that I use every day throughout the day. And it has been one of the tools that has been so accessible and transformative for my own life, my own growth, but also for my clients and students. So it's called the three A's and it's, it's a way for you to reprogram your thoughts and align more deeply with what you truly desire. I mean I'll just run through it real quick. So people have it. But the first the first A is to acknowledge. Acknowledge the thought you don't want to feel, acknowledge the judgment, acknowledge the negativity. So again, with compassion. The second A is to accept you're just having this thought because you're human. You know, this is a part of your human humaneness. We all have thoughts we're not proud of that we don't want to think or we don't want to own. So this is like the action piece of you know, shifting into your heart and just acknowledging that's a part of your humaneness. And then the third A is the transformative piece piece and that's alternative action, what are you going to do differently? So it could be implementing a mantra, a thought that you want to feel that you want to embody. It could be changing your habit, you know, little micro shift every day to shift a habit. It could be grounding yourself in the moment to shift from that hyper mental energy into your body, that that alternative action piece is the transformative piece of change and transformation. So the three A's, it's like how I work with my own mind on a day to day basis. And it's really, it's really helpful, very powerful,Lesley Logan 40:19  So powerful. I like envision myself just going through those steps in that alternative action. It's like, that's the best part because it's like, you can actually, like, make the decision to change in the moment. (Lena: Right, exactly) That's so empowering. Thank you. You're amazing, beautiful, I hope to we have to figure out ways to run into each other I'm going to definitely become your new best friend ...(Lesley laughs)Lena Franklin 40:45  On this day, let's do it.Lesley Logan 40:47  Wonderful. Well, the listener thank you so much for listening to this. How are you use these tips in your life? Do me a huge favor. Screenshot this tag, Lena Franklin, tag the Be It pod and let us know. And and you know, what do us a favor send the link to this pod to a friend because I I If this changed for you and something in your head. It's going to change for someone else. And if we as a collective even just actually understand being aware of the first part being aware, we can like really change the world there. Thank you so much for being here, everyone. Until next time, Be It Till You See It. That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day! Be it till You See It as a production of As The Crows Fly Media.Brad Crowell 41:54  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.Lesley Logan 42:05  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.Brad Crowell 42:09  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 42:18  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Perdoso for editing all video each week so you can.Brad Crowell 42:30  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Kristin chats with Gold Coast client, Amber Shaw, about her VBAC birth story and the preparation she had for her birth. Photo Credit: Dana Walsh

Tired of dieting? Well, founder of The Wellness Revolution – a global movement for women to rediscover their confidence and create bodies that look as great as they feel – Amber Shaw, is teaching us how to ditch the scale and better understand the relationship we have with food and our bodies. So if you're ready to finally get off the diet train and get to a place of contentment with yourself, get ready because after this episode, you'll never look at food as good or bad ever again!

The longer I've worked in women's health, the more frustrated I've become by the weight loss industry and the myths that are perpetuated and end up causing us more harm than good. Today I'm joined by fellow women's weight loss and health coach and the founder of the Wellness Revolution Amber Shaw, for a deep dive into these myths and why we need to stop believing them to really see any progress. Amber is the Founder of The Wellness Revolution, a leading global movement for thousands of women to empower them to rediscover their confidence and create a body that looks as good as it feels! As a Nationally Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach and a Certified Personal Trainer, Amber is committed to overhauling the diet culture so women have the support and accountability they need to change their lives. To connect with Amber, find her on Instagram or TikTok. To connect with Dr. Alex further visit: www.emergentwomencoaching.com Send an email to Dr. Alex- dralex@emergentwomencoaching.com Get $230 off an initial consultation https://www.emergentwomencoaching.com/voucher-7421 Get more free trainings and connect with our private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/trwcommunity Be sure to check out our website, follow us on Facebook and Linked In, and Instagram.

I had the opportunity to join my wonderful friend, Amber Shaw, on her podcast the Wellness Revolution to dive deep into how we can actively live in the present. It is so easy to forget to be present in our day to day lives, especially with how busy life can get. When that chitter chatter in your brain gets to be too much, we're here to tell you it's time to stop and take a breath. It's time to feel whole- It's time to be present. It's time to say YES! [14:20]“I am where I am today because of life experiences and my amazing coaches and mentors. I said ‘yes' to the part of me that wanted to inspire others.”“It's time to give yourself permission to say YES.”Make Your Impact [17:15]“I'm alive because I'm meant to do something that matters in this world.”“If I were to die tomorrow would I have really made an impact? Would I be proud of the legacy I left and the things that I've done?”“Your intuition doesn't live in your mind- you can't sense that if you're in your head all the time.”“Fear is what lives in the mind.”Breathwork is your Bridge [26:20]“Breath is what bridges the gap between the mind and the heart.”“Breathwork is a tool but it's also that bridge to our highest self and deepest truths.”“When you learn to breathe in a certain way, you can give your brain a moment to rest.”“It reminds me that I'm way more powerful than I thought I was.”Meditation and Breath [32:07]“Breathwork is an active meditation.”“Meditation felt inaccessible! It caused me to become more self-critical. Was I doing it right?”“Breathwork is more accessible because it leads you into the deep quiet of your mind through activeness.” “The point of meditation isn't to attach yourself to your thoughts, but for thoughts to come in and out of your mind.”Anxiety [37:11]“Instead of saying ‘I am anxious' reframe the thought and say ‘I am experiencing feelings of anxiety'. You are not anxious, that's not who you are.”“When you're feeling anxious, you're taking shallow breaths from your chest. When you take those deep breaths from your belly, it helps those feelings relax.”“Your body is so freaking intelligent-it's always giving you signals and messages and adapting to keep you safe.”“Anxiety is thinking about the future, depression is thinking about the past. Once you realize this, it's a big A-HA moment.”Stop making the fire bigger [46:01]“Step 1 is to become aware- catch yourself.”“Step 2 is to stop putting our focus on the things that bring you feelings of anxiety.”“Try box breathing. Set your intention for why you're going to breathe, take a deep inhale through your nose for 6 counts, hold for 6 counts, exhale for 6 counts, and hold at the bottom for 6 counts, creating a box with your breath. Repeat this for a reset.”Get in touch with Amber Shawhttps://ambershaw.comThe Wellness Revolution Podcast with Amber Shaw: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-wellness-revolution-podcast-with-amber-shaw/id1577282350If you're looking for more ways to slow down and live in the present, my signature program, Coachable University is here for YOU! Coachable U is a 12- month transformational journey to overcome limitations and step FULLY into your purpose! Want to learn more? Ready to join? Click here to get started: https://torigordon.com/coachable-u

How do Cheez-Its fit into a healthy diet? Well, Launa Jae McClung will tell you all about that on today's episode with Lesley Logan. They cover getting out of autopilot mode, listening to what your body wants, how to set boundaries - and best of all, how to keep them.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co .And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:One of the things that hold us back from showing up fully in life is the amount of brain space we give to what we can't have.The binge, guilt, shame, self-worth cycle based on the confusion of conflicting diet advice“Listening” to what your body wantsGetting out of “automation” modeSlow down, eat, assess - detach from screens whenever you're eatingSetting boundaries, respecting them so you have the space throughout the day to do what you need to doWhat is CrossFit? What is a “Murph”?Episode References/Links:Launa Jae on IGLauna Jae on FBGuest Bio:Launa Jae is a certified personal trainer, Crossfit coach, Fitness Nutrition Specialist, and founder of LVLX Wellness.Over the last 8 years, in the nutrition industry, she's tried everything from cutting out carbs to meal replacement shakes/liquid diets to the Paleo Diet, and the only nutritional method that has ever given me peace of mind was learning how to eat FLEXIBLY. Learning how to PRACTICE MODERATION -flexible dieting- has remained the single, most valuable tool in body composition preservation and fat loss for her over the years.Launa works with her clients on how to feel comfortable in their own skin, finding a way that they can eat for life, and sustain results long-term!If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co .And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.   If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookTik TokLinkedIn Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Hey babe, how are you? Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast. I'm so happy you're here. Thank you for continuing to listen and download all these episodes and share your takeaways. It's just really fun for me to see all of them. Umm I wake up in the morning, I look at my - well not right away. But like when I get to my social media I look at the different DMs from y'all and it just brightens my day to see what parts of the podcast are inspiring you. So thank you so much. This is your first time, welcome, hello, I'm Lesley Logan. This is the Be It Till You See It podcast where we are going to help you take messy action and create boundaries that help prioritize yourself, first because that's how you do anything on this planet. And, my guest today actually is going to truly help you see that it's okay to be imperfect and to work on boundaries and it doesn't come naturally for everyone, including her. And, so I think that for those of you who think of yourself as a people pleaser or struggle to umm to maintain and uphold boundaries you're really going to love this. She is a nutritionist and CrossFit coach among many other things. She really found her way into her business and her job and career through figuring things out and like asking questions. And I think that that is so important I wanted to say to you, you know a lot of people are like, "How did you become a Pilates teacher?" I was honestly like scratching an itch, I really just wanted to, I wanted to feel... I wanted to connect to myself more and I was feeling really lost in my life and umm my friend invited me to a class and I felt things in my body never felt before and I wanted to feel those again and so I just kept going and kept going and then you know I was like, "Oh maybe I..." someone was then like, "You should teach us" and I was like, "Okay" you know and I kind of just fell down this path that brought me to where I am here talking with you. And and I think you know when you're feeling a little stuck or when you're wondering like, "What is it I'm supposed to be doing?" Honestly, what do you like doing? What is what is your curiosity moment. That's really going to help dictate what you, what you're going to do. It's okay to do something that no one else has done in your life, in your family before that you haven't seen before. I know it sounds weird and scary. But umm if if I could if I could take anything out of this episode that it's like sitting with me as I talk to you, I really do think umm that you'll get that out of it. So whether or not you're interested in nutrition information or what the hell a Murph is, which you're gonna find out. There are some awesome, awesome gems in here and Launa is ... you're you are going to laugh out loud. I seriously can't wait for Brad to listen to this episode. And pull out some of the quote cards because I don't know that we have enough days in a week to put all of her quote ... quotes on a card they're just so good. We'll have to save them for a round up of awesome quotes (Lesley laughs) for a holiday episode or some like that. So anyways, I'm gonna stop talking so that I can bring on Launa McClung right after this message.Lesley Logan 3:01  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 3:46  Welcome back to the podcast. Be It Till You See It listeners, oh my gosh. Okay, so this woman I, it's really funny. My husband was in a mastermind that I made him sign up for because I was too busy. (Launa laughs) And somehow and that he ended up in a different mastermind and he would just leave a sound on and I would hear this girl and this other girl who's also on the podcast, Amber Shaw, chatting away about clubhouse and all the things and I just wanted to be in on the conversation so badly. Have you ever heard I mean like if you're listening I'm sure you've like been at a coffee shop and you hear like, "I know things. I can talk with this. (Launa laughs) These people are awesome." Anyways, I never got to until, till I kicked him out of his mastermind and I joined myself and day one met this woman in... were we in Austin, Launa? (Launa: Yeah.) Austin? Yeah. And we had just so much fun. So Launa McClung, thank you so much for being here. You are a guest today. You are such an amazing force and I can't wait to share with our listeners. Can you tell everyone a little bit who you are? What you're rockin' these days?Launa McClung 4:47  Yeah. Well, thanks for having me. My name is Launa. I am in the Dallas area and I am basically stumbled upon nutrition and fitness coaching through a bunch of trial and error. You name it I've done it from Herbalife to Keto, to Paleo to "don't eat carbs, carbs are bad for you," to "don't eat fat, fat's bad for you," and I thought there was just so much confusion in the space and got so tired of seeing my athletes bust their ass in the gym over and over and over and not seeing any of the results pay off, so I was like, "You know what? I'm gonna find a solution." So fast forward about 10 years and here we are, I'm a flexible nutrition coach that help, that helps people dial in fat loss through counting macros and then learning how to sustainably build a plate to keep the fat loss at bay long after they're done working with me. So, it's about education, action, and implementation and that's how I found Lesley. (Launa and Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 5:49  Yeah. So that's like I mean I think that's like really wholistic because you know, I definitely am a child who was born in the 80s, so elder-millennial everything was nonfat, every ... (Lesley laughs) and then those 100 calorie packs so that I would just have multiple of ... (Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 6:07  Those Chips Ahoy little cookies?Lesley Logan 6:08  And what I what I love that you share there is like there was just so much information out there that's like about restriction, restriction, don't have, don't have, keep it away from yourself. And what what I have come to learn and hanging out with a bunch of trainers and nutritionists I was like, "(A) what a macro is and (B) that it's about having all the macros represented on your plate" (Lesley laughs). (Launa: Right). And so it's really freeing and I and I really want to make sure our listeners hear that because I do think that one of the things that hold us back from showing up fully in life is the amount of brain space we give to what we can't have. (Launa: Yes ...) So, how do you how how did that help like affect you like all the things you did like no carbs and then no fat and all these things like, what was going on in your life when you were like, "I'm restricted from these things," were you like, did you feel happy? Or did it feel like free and like what was that?Launa McClung 6:56  No way dude. I was miserable because you think about like all of the information on a daily that we take in and write between social media, the TV, like if I have to watch one more news special with us nutrition coach come on and tell you this new fad diet like I mean, it's exhausting. And for me personally, I got to the point where carbs are bad, don't eat carbs, fat is bad, don't eat fat, eat salads they're healthy and then at the end of the day, you're just so frustrated and exhausted that you honestly just say fuck it, excuse my French ...Lesley Logan 7:32   No, you can speak and you can say it. (Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 7:34  Oh, I was like I don't know if I need to edit um, but just totally binge because you're so tired you have so much information coming in. And then the next day you feel guilt, shame, you attach your self worth to something as simple as putting food in your mouth and then you make a sweeping declaration to overhaul your life and it's like extremes... the pendulum swinging from one way to another and life isn't lived like that like a pandemic may or may not happen like you may get locked in quarantine with a bunch of Cheez-its and stuff like that. So, I think the extremes from, "I can't have this. I can't have this," like I mean think of any 13 year old girl, right? When you were growing up like boy crazy and your parents are like, "Don't date him!" you're gonna be like, "Babe. Hold up..." (Lesley laughs) And so giving yourself the freedom through exposing yourself in moderation to foods so that the diet industry, whatever week you're tuning in on as deemed bad or taboo, and allowing yourself to be able to trust yourself in those situations. And actually taking a step back and being like, "Alright, cool. Am I eating out of habit? Am I satisfied? Like what's going on with me?" Because I think the more that we take in information, and we're consistently looking outside of ourselves, our inner voice and like, intuition almost gets muted. And that's a miserable place to live. And I think ...Lesley Logan 9:06  100%. Oh my God, there's so much good stuff in here. I'm sorry. I like I just (Launa: No you're good) you are you are you are correct. Like we love you. Like whatever day you tune in it's like, such a it's like it's true. You could like switch from different topics. And they're like all saying different things. It's like, "What am I supposed to do?" So what do you what would you tell someone to be asking for themselves? Because you said some things on there that I think are really like, "Am I satisfied?" Like how often are we actually asking ourselves that at any part of our life? Like, "Am I satisfied?" So what are some of those questions that you ask or you have your clients ask that helps them get to listen to themselves and like maybe hear what their body wants?Launa McClung 9:48  Yeah, um, so I really think it's important. I mean, whether it's like, like humans live their lives on automation. Like if you think about how many times throughout the day, you're just an autopilot. Look like, "Okay, cool, wake up, I'm going to go get the coffee, I got to take the dog out. I know it's time to eat, but oh shit, I got busy. And now it's 11am and I haven't eaten and everything like that." So the first thing I have my clients do is to get out of the automation mode, right? Because whenever you're just putting your head down, and you're on autopilot, like, there's no other sensory type of info that can come in. And so one of the things I have them do is totally detached from screens whenever they're eating, that allows a little bit of quiet, a little bit of stillness. And it doesn't have to be like, I mean, we we live in America, not like a third world country, right? Like, you don't have to hurry up and eat your food before somebody else eats it. (Lesley: Right) And, so I just tell my clients to slow down, eat and assess like, "Alright, cool." We did a lot of this during quarantine last year, when everything shut down, like one of my loves of my life is Cheez-Its. And I'm like, "Alright, cool" (Lesley laughs) you know, I'm not gonna sit on the couch with a whole box and just mindlessly eat as I watch 90 Day Fiancé, or whatever's on TV, you know what I mean? I'm gonna pour a little bit step away, eat, asked myself, "Am I satisfied?" If the answer's "No," cool, let me go but get a little bit more. If the answer is "Yes," then I don't need any more. And then I just built trust with myself. And so doing those little things in the comfort of your own home, give your like, it gives you the freedom and the empowerment so that when you're in social situations, you don't have to be fearful around food, because eating something you're going to do for the rest of your life. (Lesley: Right) And so I think, in the comfort of your own home, being able to get clinical with it and be like, "Alright, cool. Am I eating because I'm starving? Am I dehydrated?" and trying to pay attention to all of these cues as to why your fork keeps coming to your mouth, or why you're going back for a second or third, maybe it's an emotional thing. Maybe it's a habitual thing. Maybe you're just totally shut out. And you're doing it well. Like, like I said, like out of habit. And so having little tips and tricks and being able to identify like, "Hey, boyfriend just pissed me off, I want to go take a bath with a full chocolate cake," or whatever it is, and being able to identify those things ... (Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 12:22  I wish I had a chocolate cake when I got dumped, that one (Lesley laughs) and a bathtub, that would have been way better than what I did. (Lesley laughs) (Launa: It's a whole new low, you know what I mean?) Yeah, you know, I like that you mentioned taking the screens away because I do think again, that's just more input from outside of us, like distracting our brain and like not letting us pay attention what we're doing. I am I have a book on the dining room table now so that when I sit down for breakfast, and I sit down for lunch, I just pick it up and read instead of like, looking at my social media and commenting back people it's like, "No, this is my pause time." (Launa: Yeah) And it's actually really great because I have some habit habits like with the way I eat and of course I'm just like, I love sugar. I think it's just like, my sto... my gut's like, "Ooh, you can bring us more of that." Anyways, I but I do I remember a nutritionist saying like, "The primary foods are actually like play, rest." There's a couple others in there that are like stutter like self care. It's like all these things before you eat. Like, if I'm craving sugar, "Did I get him play?" Like, "Did I go out and do anything? Did I get on a swing? Did I do ... Am I tired?" Like sometimes we're ... eating because we're tired. And I think really paying attention to our body's means really makes us be more present. And that will be a domino effect, not just with what you're eating, but also like how you work out. So you also you you're a CrossFit coach. What ... So, first of all that that scares the hell out of me. (Lesley and Launa laughs) So what, what, how did that how did that even happen? Like, what made you go and try it out? Like, what was the impetus for that?Launa McClung 14:03  Oh, gosh, you know, I think about it. So, I had friends that for lack of a better term, like drank the Kool-Aid and they're like, "Launa you should try it." And I'm like, like, you know, how if you know nothing about the science or whatever, and you're just kind of fearful of it and you're coming from a place of fear, like, you're automatically going to talk shit. And so I was like, "No, I don't want to get bulky. I don't want to look like a dude." And I'm like, like, in retrospect, I'm like, that's so hard and take so many years. So, I was like, "No, no, no." And then I was a collegiate volleyball player. So, I have that competitive like, need and me and so I really just got talked into going to a class and I fell in love. I was like, "Oh my God," like it's me versus me, I can go to a class and like, as an entrepreneur, it's really hard. Sometimes to like, I mean, you're creating programs, you're creating different offers, you're creating landing pages, and it's so much creative capacity that sometimes you just need to be told what to do. (Lesley: Yeah) And I ... (Lesley: Oh yeah that's why I go to gym.) Yeah, if I pull into the parking lot, and I have my friends like talking shit to me, like, "Hey, you missed your workout. Where are you?" I know that in an hour, I'm going to get a warm up, I'm going to get some lifting in and I'm going to get my ass kicked. And I'm going to have a cooldown along with some mobility tools. And then an hour it's done, I can shut my brain off. And, so I really liked that aspect of it, being told what to do. (Lesley: Yeah) And the community with it was great. I mean, you're not dying on the floor by yourself. There's like 10 other bodies ... (Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 15:49  Yeah and no, I ... that's how I got into Pilates. I my friend invited me and I'm like, again, totally knocked it and dissed it. I'm like, "That's that infomercial BS. It's not... and it can't do all the things it says it's gonna do." But then I like went to a class and I fell in love with it. And it's true. It's like, I was like, "Oh, I get a full body workout," I get a little bit of burn, but the soreness isn't there the next day, cuz I only did 10 reps or less. (Lesley laughs) You know, (Launa: Yeah) so like, I can be told what to do, I can work my whole self out, and I feel taller and stronger. And, and, and there's something to that, but I it's so funny how, like, we diss what we, our body actually needs like, we're like, "No, I'm gonna reject that I actually," (Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 16:30  Yeah. And I mean, I'll be totally honest, like, I'm 32. So the older I get like, the more I realize, like, it's not fitting for me to be productive, and to show up for my clients and in my business if I spend 40 minutes after a workout laying on the floor, wanting to crawl back into my mother's womb, like that takes a lot out of your central nervous system (Lesley laughs) It takes a lot out of your brain function and everything like that. So, so it's important, just as like someone in the nutrition and fitness space to be able to recognize that and like, "Alright, cool. Maybe I won't do a metcon and want to meet my maker today. Like maybe I need to conserve some of my energy for X, Y, and Z." And I think energy management is huge, especially as we get older, whether it comes to fitness, nutrition, professional aspects, everything like that. And so again, it comes back to the self auditing and really prioritizing, "Alright, cool. What needs to get done today? What can I do today?" Maybe it doesn't look like a full production of a hero workout, or doing Murph, or whatever it is, but I know I need to get some movement in so I don't sit on my couch and get balls-deep in a box of Cheez-Its. It's like, what, what needs ...Lesley Logan 17:45  What's the balance there?Launa McClung 17:48  Where does my energy need go? So, I work with my clients a lot, whether it's fitness or nutrition, on setting boundaries, respecting them. And so that way you have the space throughout the day for the things that you need to do.Lesley Logan 18:00  So, I love that two things. Oh, three, actually. One, don't don't let me forget about your boundaries. But the thing is, can you tell people what Murph is because I just heard what Murph is from you. And it's kind of crazy, and there's part of me that's super competitive and wants to do it. So, (Launa: Yeah) tell people what Murph is so that they're like me going, "Huh? Maybe?" ... (Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 18:24  Okay. So Murph, is the cool thing about CrossFit is it's a global fitness ideology, right? It's the only type of fitness that is scientifically backed as far as power output with a formula. Um, and so you could go, you could go to, I was gonna say Afghanistan, but no, um, you can go to China tomorrow and drop into a CrossFit gym and be like, "Hey, what's your Murph time?" so it's the signature hero workouts that are an honor a fallen service members. The CrossFit community does it every Memorial Day. So, it's an honor of this crazy dude who came up with this workout and lost his life in the line of action. So, it's a tribute workout. But it's four time, it starts off with a mile run, then you do 100 pull ups, 200 push ups, 300 air squats, and then finish with a mile run. And your goal or your score is four time and the prescribed diversion for men is to do it in a 20 pound weight vest and for women to do it on 14 pounds. Um ...Lesley Logan 18:24  Oh my God, I was just thinking about doing it. And just in general with a Thera band (Launa: Yeah) for the pull up situation and like (Launa: Yeah) I was like, "How can I make this work for me?" and now you're just like, "You got to put a weight vest on" and I'm like, "Wow" ...Launa McClung 19:27  So there's a bunch of different modifications for new people obviously, like I mean, not high volume reps. And if you're not conditioned to do that volume, people will do a half Murph for maybe like a partner Murph and partition the reps...Lesley Logan 19:54  Oh, so fun. We could ... I would partner Murph, my dad (Launa: Yeah) and I are doing partner workouts and it's fun. He takes a (Launa: Yeah) break ... I got break. (Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 20:02  ... Instead of all the pull ups, you could do ring rows, I mean any type of pulling motion for lat activation, things like that. A lot of people break up the meat and bones of the workout as far as the 100, 200, 300 into like 20 rounds of 5 10 15. So you can partition the reps however you want. It's more so this is like the old crossfitter and mean, but I like to think of it as ... part... of completion grade, like you can partition it however you want. The goal is to just get it done, it's not about you, or the pain, you're gonna feel, which you will probably be sore for two to three days after. But it's it's a cool type of community workout that everyone does.Lesley Logan 20:44  Super cool. Okay, so I love that you said you're 32 and as I get older, because I definitely got the eyes rolled when I would do that and at 38. (Lesley laughs) Um, I have been really interested in just really paying attention to my body and one of our guests, Jenn Pike, y'all can check out on the episodes that was she was talking about like, "Cyclical awareness and the days we can go harder." And so she turned me on to this app. And it actually syncs your workouts with your cycle. So when I open up the app in the morning, it tells me, "You can go higher intensity for these next seven days," or it's like, "Oh, for the next three days, low intensity or focus on precision" and so (A) I can do Pilates everyday which is super fun because I can just go harder or I can or I cannot which is really lovely but it lets me know like, "Oh you know maybe today I sounds like a go harder." I'll hit the peloton and all do this harder amrap or whatever workout maybe I'll do a Murph if it lines up with my cycle. And then on these other days, like, "You know, it's okay if I just go for a dog walk" like that's my body is saying that's okay. So, I highly recommend that. So, I want to go back to boundaries. I think this is where people totally screw up Being It Till They See It because they do not have boundaries. They don't enforce them and so they have high hopes for themselves. They get listened to a podcast like this. They're like, "Yes, boundaries," or some sort of inspiration and then that life happens. So, what are your, how do people? How do you get people to like, put a boundary in place and then keep it? Like, what are your tips there?Launa McClung 22:18  Hmm. To be totally honest, I struggled with this for the longest time. I totally forgot what my enneagram or whatever that is ...Lesley Logan 22:27  No, I haven't done that. I keep thinking I'm going to do that. And it's like, I'll probably forget what it is. It's like, I don't even remember my sign. So it's okay. (Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 22:33  I was like a seven. I don't know, anyway, I'll tell you about myself. I'm a giver, and I get energy from pouring in other people. And, I found myself over the past 15 years, like basically, my whole adult life is I would give and give and give and give and then be too exhausted to get shit done, then I would feel a lot of guilt and shame and just want to sleep all day. And it wasn't until I hired my first coach, business coach that she was like, "Look, you have to have time for you." And so I think with me, initially setting boundaries, it felt really sticky. And I felt like a selfish bitch. And I just I felt guilty for it. Because like, "Oh, well why can't I answer a DM?" Like, "Why can't, I console my friend at Monday at two o'clock when she needs me," but it's like, "Okay, well what do I need?" And whether it's fitness nutrition, professional, with your spouse, whatever, if you don't have those boundaries and those schedule like, "Hey, this is Me time," so that you can take care of yourself, you're going to show up for other people's a half assed version of yourself. I always tell my clients like, "Make sure you're good and you can use your whole ass and whatever you do, because if you just exhaust yourself, your kids are gonna get a quarter-ass version, your spouse is going to get another quarter-ass, your job is going to get another quarter-ass and now you're feeling like shit because everyone's pissed off at you. You're about to lose your job. And now you have nothing left." (Lesley: Yeah) Um, maybe that's a little extreme. But ...Lesley Logan 24:09  Ish, and no, like, I think that that's definitely a spiral that has happened to many people or many listeners, you know, they know something that's happened to and it's like, "Yeah, you know, so that that will that could be you," like, ... you know, it's kind of like when the spiral happens it's really wide and so it doesn't feel like it's a big deal. It's like, "Oh, I'm good" because it's like you know you're on the bigger ring. But then as it goes down, it's faster and it gains more momentum. And so the the slippery slope is pretty huge there.Launa McClung 24:19  Yeah. And then like for me, whenever I found myself in like the really small slippery slope, it would manifest in my body is sickness, like ex... total exhaustion, zero sex drive, irritability, like having... being pissed off because I have to go to the grocery store to spend so much money on medication like just laid out for 48 hours, when really, if I just paid attention and set boundaries to those warning signs my body was giving, I wouldn't be in this position, you know, and I think just being able to kind of audit and recognize your tendencies and then playing to your strengths of like, "Alright, cool. Maybe I'll set a timer." And that's one of the things that I give all of my clients, at some point in the duration of working together ... I give them selfish homework for a week, like one thing a day, whether it's, you go get a manicure, you drive home, you get home and you sit in your car for dead silence for 15 minutes. I don't care what anyone says. That is a whole vibe in and of itself. I even had one client that locked herself in the bath... bathroom, told her kids, she was taking a shit and drew a bubble bath and just chilled out. (Lesley laughs) And I think it's really important because whenever we're chronically stressed, again, that goes back to showing up half-assed and other aspects of your life.Lesley Logan 25:59  Oh, 100%. I have a friend who would like DM me from the bathroom. She's like, "I've got a glass of wine and a chocolate bar, and I'm just sitting on the toilet seat and I'm just ..." (Lesley laughs) (Launa: I know) Like, "I'm not going to the bathroom, don't worry, but my kids won't bother me if I'm in here." (Lesley and Launa laughs)Launa McClung 26:14  Yeah. Yeah and I mean, boundaries.Lesley Logan 26:17  Yeah. Yeah. So so I guess like when you were first putting these boundaries in place, like finally starting to do it? What was like the first boundary, you know, because like you can just go, "Okay, I'm gonna put a boundary here here." You can just go all in like it's you gotta like, you know, baby step it, so like, what was the first boundary put in place and how did you like, how did you help yourself enforce it?Launa McClung 26:40  I think the first as an entrepreneur, like speaking of screen times, we live off of our phones, and it's our job to be accessible to our clients to interact with people, connection is our MO. (Lesley: Yeah) And so for me, the first thing, I was like, "Alright, how can I reverse engineer this?" And so it was, "Okay, well, if I was working at the doctor's office, or wherever, I'd work a nine to five." And so when it's couch time, and you're like sitting with your spouse, you know, it's really easy to just respond to this and respond to that. So, I tell my clients Monday through Friday, nine to five, they get me in Voxer, and everything like that, if it's the weekend, I have to have a weekends, too. And so the first thing I did to kind of reinforce that any nutrition audit or discovery calls that I did with potential clients, I was like, "Hey, you have voxer access to me Monday through Friday, nine to five." So they knew what the deal was whenever they came in. And the more I started saying that, the more I was like, "Hey, Launa." Like, "Remember Launa? This is your boundary, like you said it" and so ...Lesley Logan 27:52  That's Be It Till You See It right there. (Launa laughs) You're like, "Okay, these are my hours." I'm gonna tell them "these are my hours" and every time I (Launa: Yeah) tell them "these are my hours." I am literally like, look like put another little level on my boundary wall (Lesley laughs) (Launa: Yeah) around me. I love that.Launa McClung 28:09  Yeah, and so one of the things I do is whenever I'm out, like whenever working hours are done, I turned my phone off of ring. So, if I get a notification it doesn't annoy me. And a lot of the times Brandi makes fun of me, my girlfriend makes fun of me all of the time because I'm like, "Where's my phone?" On nights and weekends, I'm like, "Where'd it go? Oh God, where's my phone? (Lesley laughs) I gotta I gotta do this" and she's like, "Huh?" Or like even my friends know like, "Hey, Launa is not working." And I think it's for people in our space it's weird because a lot of people's downtime is their phone. And for us that's work time and so my friends know that you know like when we're like this weekend we're going to the pool and hanging out like, "Launa is not playing music from her phone. She's not ordering the doordash like it's (Lesley: Yeah) good luck finding it" and so for me I would kind of have to hide it from myself until I got comfortable in like, "Hey, this doesn't have to be done right this instant world is not gonna end if I don't respond in five minutes" like, "I'm important but I'm not that important" like ...Lesley Logan 29:18  Right, we're not the president they tell, "It's gonna be okay. It's just gonna be okay" ... I wouldn't know if anyone knows this. I know that there's apps that like turn off like social media on your computer for a certain time but I actually want certain apps to turn on and off. So like, you know like my messenger on Facebook. I would love for that to turn off on my days off. I would ... you know like because I'm you know, I it's you're so right, like connection is our currency basically, it's absolutely what I market to every ... OPC it's like you get connection and community I'm in there, but (Launa: Yeah) I can't be in there every day. And that community is in Facebook, which is also where my mom wants to apparently like, she likes to tag me and things I was like ... "I love you mom but if you could text me because I don't want to be on social media on the weekend," (Lesley laughs) (Launa: Yeah) you know, so um I guess I wish there was like an app that we could like you know just plug in our schedule like these are the times you can send me notifications on these days. (Lesley laughs) Right?Launa McClung 29:24  I know. Maybe like I mean, if anybody's listening to this and has that creative genius to create that ...Lesley Logan 30:24  Yeah. I think there's money in that.Launa McClung 30:26  Lesley Logan and Laura McClung, we came up with that...Lesley Logan 30:28  Yeah, yeah, we'll be we'll be affiliates for that. And (Launa: Yeah) I mean, there's just a lot of a lot of everyone's make, using their phone for money now and I think that that is going to be a thing that people are gonna have to do. This is um, I just really think this is a lot of fun because, basically, you know, it's whether or not anybody wants to pay attention to their nutrition or their workouts, whatever your thing is, like the what I love that you've been saying this whole time is like, really, is paying attention to what you need first. Giving yourself that thing protecting that so that you can do all these other things that you want to do" and I think that's really really cool. Okay, so obviously everyone's obsessed you have some really fun little (Launa laughs) jokes in there. I really "meet your maker" might be my the first time that's ever happened on this podcast. Where can people (Launa: You're welcome) (Lesley laughs) where can people find you, follow you, connect with you?Launa McClung 31:21  Um, so on Instagram, my handle is Launa @launajae_, Facebook is Launa Jae. You can slide into my DM, snapchats Launa Jae basically Launa Jae, anything. Um ...Lesley Logan 31:37  Yeah. And she will respond to you between Monday and Friday, nine to five. (Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 31:41  Exactly. And if it's on the weekends, forget about it. (Launa laughs)Lesley Logan 31:44  Yeah, we will make sure we have all of that in the show notes below. Because y'all are gonna screenshot this, you're going to tag us and you're going to share your takeaway, not just because it like gets the podcast out, which it does. And thank you for doing that. But also, you know, for people like Launa and I, it's really we want to know what resonates with you, we want to know what's like hitting it where you know, like, like, "Oh, yes, that," because that helps us create more things that you want. Like that's just what we do. So, everyone follow screenshot tag and let us know what your takeaway is. Okay. I ask every guest this, "What are your tips for being it till they see it? Like, what are some quick tips, hot tips, you know, as many as you want that help people prioritize themselves.Launa McClung 32:31  I think the first one is, you're going to feel fear no matter what it is. Um, so I would say "Fuck the fear, do it anyway," you're never going to feel ready, you're never gonna feel like the conditions are perfect. But if you don't take action, you're going to be in the exact same spot 1, 2, 3, 10 years from now. So ...Lesley Logan 32:54  Yes, I love all of that. And I think we just came up with three shirts. (Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 33:01  I can't wait to wear it in LA. The second one as far as be it till you see it. Um, I would say kind of this is probably like a sub point from number one. But I think um, you have 100% survival rate of every situation, everything scary, everything big that you've ever been in. So, if you can count on one person in the entire world, to put your best interest in, like, front and foremost it's you. So, if you've survived everything you've ever been through, you will survive this too. And, so if it's up to you, you got really good odds. So, I would just remind yourself of that it even if you feel like an imposter, even if you're like, "Oh, I don't know if I can do it." That's just playing small and trying to hold you back. So just know you got 100% ... (Lesley: I'm inspired) (Lesley laughs) ... I needed to hear myself talk yesterday. (Launa and Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 34:05  I've been there. I'm like, "Wow, listen to me. I should have (Launa: Wow) I should have said that to myself yesterday." (Launa: Did you hear that? I hope you do ...) I mean, I think we all ... are we all just like saying the things that we need to hear the most, you know, like (Lesley laughs) Launa McClung 34:19  Probably. (Lesley: Yeah) And I'm like ... and then the third thing I think for me personally, especially the past year and a half with everything going on, is reaching out and connecting with people who are going through the same shit as you. If it wasn't for you, Lesley, Brad, Amber, Casey Jo, like, I would be a mental case right now and then obviously my coach. So, if you feel like you're unequipped to do something on your own, find someone that you trust that you connect with that can help you through the trenches that's been there before, whether it's a friend, a colleague, a coach, um, and really just relying on that because you're all gonna have shitty days. Like we're all gonna go back to like crazy emotional women one time a month maybe two or three and I think it's really important to have that community like I said like with CrossFit or with Pilates what got us to the class was being invited and having someone else there with you. And I think that's really important for sustainability and consistency whether it's fitness nutrition, entrepreneurship, anything.Lesley Logan 35:27  I freakin' love that. I do I we were, y'all when you're listening to this it's not the same day though we've ... (Launa laughs) we're recording this, just though that you know these things happen in the ... in the past for me and but I I couldn't sleep this last evening, like last night. So, I woke up and I must have woken up at like a REM like, because I was I was wide awake and cannot go back to sleep. And I did my sunset simulation lamp again, didn't work. I did my sleepy time music didn't work. I put on my McConna... McConaughey bedtime story. He could not put me to sleep, I listened to the whole thing. And then it was creating more and more anxiety. So actually just got up at like, 2:30 I was like, "Let's just get up. We'll work and if we ... when we get tired, we'll go and take a nap." Right? And you were up texting me and I was walking like at 5am so two and a half hours later, I was walking my dogs and my dad's like, "Why are you taking a picture?" and I'm like, "I'm showing this girl, (Launa laughs) what time it is here." But what the point of the story is like, currently we're both going through the same thing in our business and as many of our friends are, and it's so important to have those people who are going through that because I was telling my dad what I was having to go through right before I was texting you. I was telling him everything he's like, "Oh yeah, but you'll do fine. You'll just do fine. Hey, look at this. Oh, did you hear about ... like all these things like on the sports," and I'm like, "Oh, okay, got it." So it's just another there's another blip on the radar. Not, not that he doesn't care he just doesn't understand (Launa: Yeah) it as a different thing than just any other day. And so you have to find people who are going through it, going through what you're going through so you can be like, "Oh my God, I have a launch going on." And I go, "Oh, when's your date start like that." (Launa: Yeah) So they know what all that entails or whatever it is, whatever your thing is, and so I love that one so much. I can't wait to hear what Brad's takeaways are. Y'all, as you know, we recap every episode so definitely stay tuned because it's really fun for me to hear what Brad's favorite one ... (Launa and Lesley laughs)Launa McClung 37:29  I cannot wait.Lesley Logan 37:30  Oh yeah, he has to listen to all of these. (Lesley laughs) And and then we and we talk about it. So it'll be really fun. I if you want to guess what it is we'll, maybe, make it a competition. Launa, thank you for being a guest this week. Everyone, thank you for being a listener. We are rising up the ranks because of you. So keep the reviews and shares coming. Tell your friends to listen, it's super, super important that's like literally the best thing to do for a podcast is rate, review, and share it. Like basically that's your currency for us, and helps us add value to other people. So thank you so much. And until next time, be it till you see it. Lesley Logan 38:04  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!Lesley Logan 38:32  'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell 38:36  It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 38:44  Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.Brad Crowell 38:49  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 38:58  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.Brad Crowell 39:09  And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How do you know when you're overcommitted? What should therapy be like? Are you outsourcing your worth? Lesley and Brad cover all of this in today's recap of Amber Shaw's episode.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co .And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:How do you know when you're overcommitted?Xuxa (she's Brazilian, not Australian like LL mentioned in the show)Therapy is like laundry...Food is more than just caloriesStop outsourcing your worth and value to a scale...Episode References/Links:Pop Up Pilates Tour, join our email listXuxaThe Four Tendencies by Gretchen RubinAmber's websiteIf you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookTik TokLinkedIn Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Hey, Be It pod listener, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for being you. Thanks for watching our podcast here on our YouTube channel. I'm just so grateful for you. I have a big favor, and I'm, I mean like, let me just say, "It's not easy for me to ask for help," but I need your help. I'm on a mission, I really want to change as many lives and help people be it till they see it all over the world, and I need your help. We have been so grateful. The amount of downloads our podcast has had in just a short period of time is, it's amazing. That's insane. However, we also need more written reviews. So, and specifically on Apple. So even if you are watching here on YouTube, or you listen on Spotify, or you listen on Google Play, Apple podcast is where everyone looks to see which podcasts they should send people on for interviews. And, so we need lots of reviews to be there like a hundred written reviews. So, big huge favor if you could give us the link below, go write a review, rate us, give us all the stars you love and let me know. Screenshot it, send it to me on a @be_it_pod. I just want to thank you for the bottom of my heart. We are truly, truly can't do this podcast without you. And, I'm just so grateful that these words hit your ears. And if you wouldn't mind writing us that review that would be amazing. And, I will be so forever grateful. Thank you and now here's the podcast you wanted to listen to.Lesley Logan 1:19  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 2:04  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co hosts in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the infectious convo I have an Amber Shaw (Brad: Oh yeah) (The good kind of infectious by the way.) (Brad laughs) in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now and go figure out how to listen to that one on whatever podcast platform you listen to, and then come back and join us. Or, I think sometimes if you listen to this one, and you just keep listening, it will just go through the list. It depends. I actually don't know how to work my own podcast app. So you know, let us know.Brad Crowell 2:38  If you're looking at all episodes of a podcast, they will just go to the next one. (Lesley: That's true.) Yeah. But if wha... if you're looking at your (Lesley: Leave it in) what's going to be played next, then it's gonna ... jump from pod to pod.Lesley Logan 2:48  This is why we have Brad everyone. That's why we have him.Brad Crowell 2:51  It is a party.Lesley Logan 2:52  Okay, so y'all, we're actually gearing up to plan our road trip. This is our fourth year road tripping our fifth year road tripping? (Brad: Four) Four, this is the only the fourth time (Brad: Yeah) that we've done this nonsense. (Brad: Yeah) Okay, so y'all back in 2018, I was in protest about flying to the East Coast. It's a long story, but you cannot get a flight to Philly from LAX under $1,000, nonstop. So $1,000 with a stop, usually in a state that has snow storms, and always ...Brad Crowell 3:23  Like Detroit or something like that. Chicago...Lesley Logan 3:25  Chicago, Denver and always a red eye. We never got one during the day. (Brad: Yeah) And twice, the only times I've ever fallen asleep on a plane. There was an emergency, and all the lights turn on. (Brad laughs) And even Brad was like, "Are you kidding me?" So in 2018, I said, "I would not go back unless we drove." And Brad said, "Okay." So we rented too small of a vehicle and drove across the country with two dogs. We didn't have three yet and it was so fun. It was so fun. And the whole time we went I was being DM on Instagram, "Are you teaching classes?" And I thought, "Oh, people people are home during the holiday." So then the following year, we did a pop-up. And we did eight city tour and it was so fun. And then obviously year number three. Well, we all know what 2020 was. So we're back, we are road tripping again. We road trip last time but this time we're going to take more than two and a half days to get across country. (Brad: Yes) And we're gonna make some stops.Brad Crowell 4:26  We are, we're gonna make some stops and they're they're not, they're not locked in just yet. But we've got ...Lesley Logan 4:31   No, so there's still time to get your city on the list.Brad Crowell 4:34  And we've got quite, we've got an exciting schedule. (Lesley: Yeah) That's gonna take us from (Lesley: Here) Vegas up to New York City (Lesley: Yeah) to down to Miami. (Lesley: Yeah) And then (Lesley: Through Texas) coming back across across the country there. So ...Lesley Logan 4:52  What is set in stone is Atlanta on the 28th? (Brad: Right) And somewhere outside of Philly on the 19th and a Miami hot spot. It's hot on the 30th. But other than that's all I can say. So if you are excited about that, then you're gonna want to get on the list. You know, just below there's a show note, get on the list on our email, we will let our email peeps know exactly when is, when, what is happening and how to snag your spot.Brad Crowell 5:22  Yeah, yeah, just make sure you're on our email list. And you'll find out about it for sure.Lesley Logan 5:26  I'm so excited you can get on the list. You can get that free class and then you'll just be automatically on a list and you do the workout, (Brad: It's work too. Yeah) Yeah that's that. So um, anyways, okay, so what question do we have this week?Brad Crowell 5:39  Alright, so this week, the first question we had was, "Wha... How do you know if you are over committed?"Lesley Logan 5:48  Yeah. So I, I got this question, actually, from our panel we had at the house. We had a pop-up at the house, our first one. (Brad: Oh) And this question was asked to me and the other amazing women on the panel, one who's been on the podcast, and one who's gonna be on the podcast. So shout out to Erica and Megan. And they had great answers, but I thought it'd be fun for us to share the answers with all of you. So, how do you know if you're over committed? This is like a really interesting question. I think sometimes, you know, after you've over committed. (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 6:24  Usually, that's how it happens when things start falling out of the sky, figuratively, you know, meaning plates start dropping, then you start to realize, "Oh, I'm not being effective. I'm actually not serving anyone." Definitely know how that goes, having had three business partners and a spouse with three different companies and a spouse who had a company too. And I really was kind of spinning, spinning my wheels. I was still making everything.. Like, I was meeting deadlines, generally speaking, but nothing was growing. It wasn't actually, you know, it was a crazy couple of years of, you know, non-stop all day long, kind of a non-sustainable effort. And by by pulling back and shifting, focusing, suddenly, one thing started to grow. And that was very exciting to see. It also made me kick myself because I didn't need to wait two years to figure that out.Lesley Logan 7:28  He means (Brad: Three?) working with me. And (Brad: I do) you know, it made me think of okay, so very few people will remember this. But if you are listening to this, and you remember this show, let me know. So when I was a little girl, there was a show called Xuxa. And it was like a talk show like, I don't know what you call those shows, variety shows. And she was Australian host and her name was like Xuxu. And somehow that was Xuxa. I don't know. It's an Aussie thing maybe I'm wrong. Australian listeners, Jojo I hear I know you're listening when your dog walk, let me know. If you remember this, it would be 30 years ago. Anyways, she had these tall boots and she had this guest on and he had all these plates on a stick. And he was like, run around the stage. And he would like spin a plate and he'd run around and the whole thing was like, "How long can he keep all the plates spinning before they fell?" And it was thrilling and stressful for nine year old all at the same time. And that's what came to my mind while you were telling your story... (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 8:28  Wow. Okay, I'm not I'm not gonna look that up. But I'm gonna take your word for for that.Lesley Logan 8:33  Anyways, I want to know, who knows who Xuxa is. And if you watch the show, and you remember that person. Okay, um, 100% I think what one of the guests at our, at our panel Megan said was like, when you get resentful, like when you're like when you when you go to do the thing. And you're resentful that you said "yes" to the thing – that is a sign you over committed. I think crying is a sign you're over committed.Brad Crowell 8:58  Right. Overwhelmed that like incredible overwhelm. (Lesley: That overwhelm) Debilitating.Lesley Logan 9:02  Yeah. Because you know, like, this is exciting and also, you're so tired. And so for me, I've gotten a lot better when I shared with the group who was here at the house. As I said, "I'm so grateful for my husband" because he's just like, "You could just cancel." And like he's a rebel, if you know "The Four Tendencies" someday Gretchen Rubin will come, or will respond to an email (if I send one to her.) And so don't, don't shout her out. Like I haven't actually emailed to ask her - but, she wrote the book, "The Four Tendencies" and Brad's a rebel and I'm an upholder, which means if I say, "I'm gonna do something. I'm gonna do it whether I told you or not." And it's very hard for me to let go of something I said "yes" to and Brad has taught me that it's okay to cancel something and what I said to the group was like, "We're not brain surgeons. It's okay." If we say, "I'm so sorry. I know I said yes to this but can we do it a different time because it's it's not life or death." So anyways, I loved that question that we got the panel and I wanted to share it with you. So I hope you enjoy I'd love to know your responses.Brad Crowell 10:01  Yeah. Okay, now let's talk about Amber Shaw. Amber Shaw who we both know (Lesley: We love Amber) IRL, is on a mission to help women find food freedom by skipping the dieting vortex. She is a mom of two, divorcee and ex corporate saleswoman turn entrepreneur and podcast host. She is a force, her energy is infectious, and you will fall in love with her very straightforward personality and her advice. It was a very fun episode. (Lesley: Did you like it?) I did. I mean, I also know her personality from hanging out with her. And so it was I could I could actually see her, you know, in my mind, like being herself (Lesley: Yeah) together with you. I thought it was great. Or you can watch it on YouTube. (Lesley: Yeah, yeah) I was not producing it from the video, I was producing it from the audio. (Lesley: Yeah) But ... (Brad laughs)Lesley Logan 10:53  As we do. But it is, she is amazing. And I actually, we met her together in person in real life in Austin, Texas earlier this year, and the two of you are like karaoke lovers. So I was so grateful for her because it's like, "Bye." (Lesley and Brad laughs) Anyways, one of the things I love that she talked about was therapy and the importance of it, and I, I think I will, every time someone brings up therapy make this a point that I love, because (Brad: Sure) as I tell my therapist, therapy needs to rebrand for whatever reason, we think you go to therapy when you're broken, but like, therapy is like, laundry, you just, you should just keep doing it. So you, you know, cuz then when you're in need ...Brad Crowell 11:33  Because then you run out of socks.Lesley Logan 11:35  Yeah, you otherwise like, maybe some people do therapy. Like they do their laundry like they wait till they're out of socks, out of underwear, all the things. But if you keep up with the therapy and your laundry at the same time, then it's kind of nice maintenance. And so I just think that no matter what month it is, I don't care. It's Mental Health Awareness Month or regular month. Therapy is something I will always love when when people bring it up. And you too should find a therapist.Brad Crowell 12:03  That's a great rebrand.Lesley Logan 12:05  Yeah, on laundry. (Brad laughs) Therapy is like a laundry. Keep doing it regularly. (Brad: I love that) (Lesley laughs) Do it so you don't run out of underwear. (Brad and Lesley laughs) What's another tagline we could go? Therapy, it's it's like you're I don't know. I'm not good at this. I'm not a marketing person (Brad: Yeah) anyways, it comes out or it doesn't. Okay, that's I love. What did you love?Brad Crowell 12:25  That was really funny. Okay, I I was I was laughing really hard. Well, I was laughing really hard... Well, I was laughing really hard about you about that. But she said something that I really connected with, and I have shared on the pod before. So I'm not going to tell my whole story on that here. But she said it was obvious that she wasn't eating enough calories. And you know, that's a it's, it's funny, I wonder if that goes hand in hand with, you know, for actually, you know what, for me that happened after I while while I was going through a divor... a divorce for her, that was just the way she grew up. You know, she was basically completely connected with magazines and diets and working out and all the things to the point of obsession where it was detrimental to her and she wasn't eating enough. But what I wanted to talk about instead was stop looking at food as calories in and calories out, which also something that she she shared. And I think that the that's not something I ever had to personally tackle. I actually had to do the reverse where I had to start counting calories because I wasn't eating enough calories. When I got to the point where I felt like I was eating enough calories, then I just kind of stopped doing that. But I I think that the she talks about freedom with food. And she talks about building up your your food experience, your relationship with food to the point where you can splurge on a Thursday night and not freak out about it, you know, not freak out about the calories that you may have consumed because you're on a regimen for the rest of the week, you know, or whatever, you're, you're being consistent about it. And I just wanted to encourage you know, others who are really dealing with that kind of a association with food to connect with Amber. (Lesley: Yeah) Because she, you know, I'm clearly not the spokesperson for that but she is and she has come through quite a journey, a relationship with food to where she can enjoy eating, (Lesley: Yeah) and it became very obvious from listening to her story.Brad Crowell 12:26  Well, I have brought on a couple we've had Giselle before with Amber (Brad: Giselle as well, sure.) We got someone coming up, because ladies, (excuse me, ladies) ladies, we keep outsourcing our worth and value to a scale and we have to stop, like the size your jeans doesn't determine the amazingness that you are. And being it till you see it, you cannot do that if you're like, allowing a number on a scale or what's on your plate to determine if you did a good job today or not. And so I will continue to bring these amazing women on until we have overcome this thing. And it might take us years because I was definitely raised with the magazines and with the with the women and I told Jen Jennifer van Barneveld-Pe, I said, "I grew up with these magazines and I'd rip out the articles and I was trying to be these girls" and and you know what, I actually can't blame the magazines because I'll be really honest, I was listening to her and another woman talk on Jenny's podcast this week, that we actually are sometimes we're inferring a different thing. Like I was listening, I was looking at fitness magazines and I was inferring a different size on these women than was actually there and so I think we have to take ownership of that and have some more fun in our lives. And and not judge like every meal based on like, whether that was enough because we have bigger things to do than worry about that. So I'm glad that that was your takeaway and yes, reach out to Amber, she's freaking awesome. (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 16:24  ... freaking awesome.Lesley Logan 16:26  Amber's freakin' awesome. Amber's freakin' awesome. We will not make fun that right one. (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 16:31  ... that just happen. Okay. All right. So finally, let's talk about the BE IT action items you discussed with Amber Shaw. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items, can we take away from your convo with her? (Lesley: She had so many.) She she did. She actually had quite a list and she and she said, "Consistency is the name of the game with moderation and satisfaction." And I thought that was awesome. You know, because it's like a step by step approach. But that's not what I wanted to talk about. I wanted to talk about, you know, something that I personally have experienced, which was the divorce scen... scenario. And she said, it's so hard, especially when you're in it, you know, in life is a mess. And, you know, she said to grow, ask yourself, "Why am I going through this? What lesson can I learn here? What is the purpose of this?" And first off, I just want to say if you can ask yourself that, you know, right away, you are more objective than I.Lesley Logan 17:40  You're being it till you see it. You don't even need this podcast. (Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell 17:43  Yeah, yeah, because I certainly couldn't look at it from the a third party perspective. Until I had had actually started to just kind of my life was wearing, my life was beginning to fall apart and my my relationships, my work, my friends, everyone started to see, like me getting frayed. And it wasn't until that point, which was, you know, six, eight months in that I really started to realize I can't do this forever, I can't maintain this lie, that everything's fine. And nobody needs to know. You know, the, the, my, you know, the, what I was going through with my divorce. And it was only at that time that I began to say, "Alright, what's, you know, what's the other side is look like," you know, "Okay, I am going to get a divorce. There's no way around that. What does that mean for me? How ..."Lesley Logan 18:37  It means you get to marry me. (Lesleyt laughs) (Brad: Yeah) He didn't know me yet. Don't worry, don't freak out. It wasn't that ...Brad Crowell 18:42  I did not. But you know, and that was kind of the beginning of the change in in me. And so anyway, I would encourage you if you're going through something really dark and it's you know, haunting you, if you can write down, "Why am I going through this?" and then write it down. Because it's hard to just think about it because I know the thoughts just go in circles and you know, you review every conversation, everything that ever happened around it. But what lesson can I learn here and what is the purpose of this?Lesley Logan 19:12  I love that you said write it down because it's true. You're going to replay everything in your head and that's actually the worst place to replay it. (Brad: Oh, yeah) Get it. Your pe... cuz your skull is only so big. Get it out and put on paper. You have more paper than you have space.Brad Crowell 19:23  Yeah. And if you have trouble sleeping, you know, put on some music. And instead of letting your mind wander, focus on the music. Because that was something that my mind. I mean, I could I could lay awake in bed for hours and hours just like thinking. And if you are instead focusing on something else, intentionally focusing on the music, let's say then you're not letting your mind dwell on you know, the pain. SoLesley Logan 19:50  Yeah. I love that takeaway. My biggest takeaway was I love the way she says it too, because she's got that accent from she's got that accent. It's so good. She's like, take some damn time for yourself. (Brad: Yeah) Did I do it well? ... Amber let me know if that was good enough. (Brad laughs) Um, y'all, seriously, of course I would love this as a takeaway. It is so important, especially right now, especially right now, if you're listening to this in timestamp order. It's almost Thanksgiving in the States, which means it's almost Christmas no matter where you live in this planet. And this is when people be crazy. There's a lot of demands, you feel like there's all these things you have to do. There's some traditions, there's probably some recipes you're supposed to be making from scratch because who knows what. No. Before you ...Brad Crowell 20:35  Your in-law's famous apple pie that you somehow got saddled with making and bringing to dinner...Lesley Logan 20:40  You know what my parents did that I like, have always thought was genius as a kid. They just always signed up to bring bread. So look, listen to me, look ... and I'm like look if you're on the YouTube. Listen, if you're on the podcast, you must this is the, if you don't do it any other part of the year, this is a part of the year to take some damn time for yourself! Seriously, you will lose your mind, you do not want to be the person who like lose their mind. If you have seen home for the holidays, I'm telling you it's a thing I watch every Thanksgiving. If you do not (Brad: She does) take some damn time for yourself. You're going to be that mean sister who ends up with like Turkey, just, juice all over her pretty dress, crying, we'll everyone's laughing. But not but like also they are because it's just like, no one's taking time for themselves. And everyone's like get that's how I feel on the inside. So that's my Be It action item. Take some damn time for yourself.Brad Crowell 21:32  Skip the turkey dressing ... (Lesley: Please) Yeah.Lesley Logan 21:34  Yeah. Just bring some bread. I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell 21:38  And I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 21:39  Thank you so much for joining us today. We are so freaking grateful for you and it's a month of gratitude. But we are grateful to you all the time. How can you use these tips in your life? What are your favorite takeaways? Screenshot this tag us, tag Amber Shaw. Let us know because it really does mean the world to us. And it's the best way you could thank us. And we will see you on the next episode.Brad Crowell 21:57  Bye for now.Lesley Logan 22:00  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!Lesley Logan 22:28  'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell 22:32  It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 22:39  Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.Brad Crowell 22:45  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 22:54  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the videos each week so you can.Brad Crowell 23:05  And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Are you stuck in that dieting cycle, jumping from one to the next? Is your relationship with food constantly something you are obsessing over? Meet Amber Shaw, a health and wellness expert. She and Lesley dig through finding food freedom, skipping the dieting vortex, creating consistency, moderation and satisfaction in your food choices.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co .And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Finding food freedomSkip the dieting vortexNot eating enough caloriesTurning 40You are at the right place at the right timeTherapyPutting yourself firstStop looking at food as calories in and calories outConstantly dieting Episode References/Links:Amber on TikTokAmber on IGAmber's websiteAmber's podcast, The Wellness RevolutionGuest Bio:Amber is a Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution, a leading global movement for thousands of women to empower them to rediscover their confidence and create a body that looks as good as it feels (inside and out)!She has extensively coached thousands of women 40+ from all across the world to get off the crazy train of dieting and find true food freedom so they can feel empowered, confident and sexy.As a Nationally Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach and a Certified Personal Trainer, Amber is committed to overhauling the diet culture. Her mission is to help millions of women worldwide heal their relationship with food and themselves while empowering them to transform their lives, love their bodies and create lasting results.If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookTik TokLinkedIn Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Hey you, welcome back to Be It Till You See It. Aahhh. I can't get over that I get to do this as par... as like part of my living. I love talking to you, I truly do. I also am obsessed with the takeaways that you are sharing with me on all the things, whether it is on Instagram and tagging @be_it_pod or it is on our YouTube channel, or it's on Facebook. And you know, however you want to get a hold of me to share with me your takeaways, I will take it because I want to make it easy for you. And, I also believe that when we write things down that it sticks with us, and so thank you for being a listener first and foremost. And if this is your first podcast, you're listening to us. Well hello, and welcome to Be It Till You See It. Today's guest is an epic woman and I cannot wait for you to hear her strategies for you to Be It Till You See It. Oh my gosh. I literally, I literally hung up with her and I went and did one of them. And so you'll have to guess which one I did. I'd love to hear it. But her name is Amber Shaw and she is someone that I think so many of you will resonate with. She was in corporate sales for 16 years. She is a mom and she went through divorce right before her 40th birthday. And she used all of that to propel her on this journey and this mission on this planet. And it is so filled with purpose and she is such an awesome human being so I can't wait for you to dive into this episode. Please do us a huge favor and after you listen to it, share us your takeaways. I know it will not only make Amber's day, it'll totally make mine and you never know who's going to see that post you do and it's going to light a fire under them and it's going to be the sign that they needed to do the thing which is Be It Till You See It. So here comes the amazing interview with Amber Shaw right after this message.Lesley Logan 1:53  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 2:36  Alright. Welcome to Be It Till You See It. I'm so thrilled to have Amber Shaw here. Y'all, she is someone I don't even know if we would ever met had I not been like, "What's this thing? Who's this person? Okay, I love her. I'm going to sign up for this mastermind," and then got my booty down to Austin, Texas and got to meet her and definitely left her on a night on the town with my husband and some other people that go karaoke, but that's who she is. She's so much fun. She's full of life and I can't even wait for you to know her. Amber, welcome to the podcast.Amber Shaw 3:10  Oh my gosh, I am so fired up to be here. Yes, that infamous night in Austin. It was a blast, you I think you got out in the nick of time. (Lesley: I did. I'm really good at that.) Well like you did like yeah, I woke up the next day. I was like, "Damn, I should have gone home when Lesley went home." (Amber laughs)Lesley Logan 3:26  I'm like the queen of Irish goodbyes. I started my 20s and I mean, I guess now I do say, "Bye. I'm going." (Lesley laughs) (Amber: Yeah, yeah) I'm definitely known for we've been out at karaoke and I just call an Uber and I'm like, "Gotta go, my driver's here." (Lesley laughs) Amber Shaw 3:42  Yeah. Like that that's not me. Like I'm like, "Where's the next party?" Like, "I gotta I gotta get this going." Hahaha ..."Lesley Logan 3:47  Well, Amber. So tell us aside from like being amazing life lover and a party queen. Who are you? What do you do? How what are you up to right now?Amber Shaw 3:58  Yeah, love thank you. So yes, I am a nationally board certified health and wellness coach. I'm also a certified certified personal trainer, and I'm a body transformation expert for women over 40. Really my mission in life is to help women really get off the crazy train of dieting and heal their relationship with food and themselves so that they can really be the most competent and sexy version that they can. So, it's my life's work.Lesley Logan 4:28  Obsessed with that as someone who grew up with family members who dieted constantly (Lesley laughs) (Amber: Yes) and so my relationship with food was not super awesome. Again, you know, I had to like really rework that and rework how I thought about food with my body, how it was, became fuel, and it's definitely difficult and I think that it's really one of those things that stops women from doing things in life is this constant obsession of like, "What I can eat? What I can't eat? What is the scale say?" Like that constant whirlwind in the brain is taking up space that allows them to show up on this planet and do what they're here for.Amber Shaw 5:08  Oh, my God, I mean, absolutely, you know, I talk so much about this with my platforms my different platforms. And then when I coach women about really finding food freedom, and if you are somebody that's been in that dieting vortex for most of your life, when I say food freedom, you understand what that means. Because I think so many of us have been a slave to food and just our body image issues and a slave to the scale. And it's yeah, it's definitely, it absolutely stifles your growth that absolutely, like you said, prevents you from being who you're meant to be. And I can tell you that it wasn't until I really took that bull by the horns and tried to heal that piece of me - because of you know, years of having eating disorders and being on every diet on the plan and all of that - it really wasn't until I was able to heal that part of me that I was able to fully step into my power as a woman, as a coach, as a mentor, as all of these things. So yeah, absolutely.Lesley Logan 6:11  So how, so tell me how you got into like, even wanting to be on that journey and how you got into doing it for others? Like what was what was the impetus? What got you to go, "I'm really over this right now."Amber Shaw 6:23  Yeah, you know, so how do you say like, my story, I think, like my, how I got here is really kind of it started when I was a kid, it's kind of like a, it was like kind of the whole journey since I was a kid. And then there was an event that happened later in life that really kind of triggered it and sent it over the edge. And I will say that, you know, I know you mentioned growing up you had like family members that, you know, always were talking about dieting, and I had a very similar situation, no fault of their own. I think there's a lot of, you know, not as much awareness now about talking about that sort of thing in front of little girls. But so from the age of 10 years old, I was a lot bigger than a lot of the other girls not overweight, but just I mean, my 13 I always say I was like 5'7", I had boobs. Like, I looked like I was 18, right? And so, I just, I always felt, I just... I felt not very comfortable in my skin. And this really, really progressed, you know, to when I was 15 being on my first calorie restricted diet that I didn't even know I was doing. I just I knew that like the foods I was eating were very low in calories and apparently that's what I thought I had to do.Lesley Logan 7:24  Oh, when I was a teenager, it was when like the 100 calorie snack packs. Were really like the Snack Wells. You know, that was the whole thing. Yeah, I was like, "Ooh."Amber Shaw 7:31  Yeah, totally. Yeah, like going to like, you know, Subway and getting like a veggie sub only because that was the smallest amount of calories on the thing, like, and it just really continued to progress for me until I got into my 20s. And I started, you know, with bulimia and I always say like, I was very fortunate that I could, I had access to the resources, professional resources to really get, you know, stop the physical act of the binging and purging. But I never really healed I think that the mental piece of that. And I by that point, I was just very, very unhappy in my skin, and just really always bouncing from one diet to the next. (Lesley: Yeah) And always searching to be something a body other than my own, like whether it was I was chasing five pounds, whether it was chasing 10 pounds, whether I was wanting to be, you know, this, whatever it was, right. And so this really progressed even more so, even all the way through to where I had kids and I gained a pretty good amount of weight with both kids about 65 pounds with both. And I got the weight off, but I was just really, really unhealthy in my body. And just really just not just unhappy, very unhappy.Lesley Logan 8:47  Yeah, I resonate with that, because I definitely did not feel comfortable in my skin most of the time. Like, I just, I exercised as my way of like, because I didn't want to be on a diet, so I exercised. (Amber: Yeah) And I thought that was healthy. And it is like but I also, you know, I think I was using exercise and athleticism in a different, like different way, you know. And so even though it wasn't hours at the gym, or hours working out, it was definitely like, this is my reward or this is what I do, you know, as opposed to that's not how I work out now. I work out now because it fuels me, gives me energy, it like ... I love the dopamine, here I'm like, my brain is like, "Wooo," you know, I'm and I don't see it that way. But I feel like, I look back and I go wow, I just really was not comfortable in my body and I grew... So, I was so tall and I think that's part of it. I was like 5'9" as a 14 year old. (Amber: Even I) And so you just don't feel like you're like, "I don't even know what this body is. It's so uncomfortable." And like, you know, bless my family, but like one of them's like, "Oh, you got boobs" and it's like, "I don't actually want you to see that." (Amber: Yeah, yeah) Like I, "Who said that's okay to say?" (Lesley laughs)Amber Shaw 9:56  Right, right. Yeah, I mean exactly. I mean, I think at that age you want so badly just to fit in. And so, you know, you don't want to be bigger than the boys or bigger than the girls and so yeah, it starts to mess with you for sure. So, you know, for me, right around that time in my 30s, I got married. And, and, and I was, you know, things were I had two children, had a great marriage, and right about 2018 my marriage completely fell apart. And I was at that time, I was 39 and so right around the corner was my 40th birthday. And so I found myself in this period of my life where I, and I didn't realize at the time how unhappy, I also was... unhappy with myself. But I knew I but I was in this this, this time, where I'm in this very tumultuous time in my marriage, I'm getting ready to turn 40. And I'd also at this time, been in a very successful career as a salesperson and in corporate America, an inmate for 16 years at that point and it's been a great career, but I just did not feel fulfilled at all. I mean, it just, I could do it in my sleep. I mean, yeah, I mean, as an entrepreneur, now, some of those just tell one friend of yours, I was like, "God, sometimes I just ... wish I could go back to work in two hours a day," like and I was making lots of money, and I work two hours a day and, like, now I bust my ass and I feel like my hourly rate is $2, I'm like ... (Amber and Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan 11:22  I know, I know there's something there's but you know, it's right. Except for that you weren't fulfilled and that's why you're not there.Amber Shaw 11:29  Exactly! I mean, exactly. So, I say that jokingly but yeah, so so, I started really just going inward, I started really started reflecting, you know, "My God, I'm getting ready to turn 40. I'm in this position with my life," and I was in so much pain from just the my marriage and everything that I just was really trying to find some like light at the end of the tunnel. I'm such a believer that you're just you are in the right place at the right time. And so I just wanted to, I was just so desperately seeking what was the lesson like, you know, what, what was the lesson here? And so,Lesley Logan 12:07  I love that. I love that. So basically, like, here you are in this like daily onslaught of like, "This isn't working, and I'm getting older, and this isn't working and I'm not fulfilled." And you were seeking out the lessons for that. How do you do that?Amber Shaw 12:22  Well, it's a lot of therapy... (Lesley and Amber laughs)Lesley Logan 12:25  We're big fans of therapy around here. I'm like, "You should get therapist ... needs a therapist," you know, we have to rebrand therapy is what I think we have to do. (Lesley laughs)Amber Shaw 12:32  Oh my God, are you kidding me? Like I'm like such a believer that anybody if you have access to a therapist, like everybody needs them on their roster, just like as preventative like, I think the problem is, is we go to therapists after the shit's broken. And I will say that it's really we need to, like, it's before - that's what needs to happen. So yeah, I will say it is. Yeah, a lot of therapy, a lot of self help books, but it would also required a lot of me just going inward and literally spending time with myself. Where no, I was just shutting out everybody else, whether that was through some breathwork, whether that was through a little bit of like meditation, whatever that looked like, you know, I think as women as busy women, especially the moms out there, we spend so much time just, you know, doing for others and and taking in, you know, all the noise from everybody else. We just forget what the hell we want. We forget our own voice.Lesley Logan 13:29  Boom! That is, I've chills. That is exactly why this podcast exists. It is all about like, "How do I get women to prioritize themselves?" (Amber: Yeah) Because for whatever reason, we think if we don't do things for others, then we're a bad person. And it's like actually, if you are not taking care of you first, (Amber: Yeah) you can't do anything for anyone fully. And then you're upset at yourself for not being fully there. You feel guilty and then you're resentful that that thing that you said yes to is taking me away from like doing anything for yourself.Amber Shaw 14:02  Yes, yes, absolutely. I mean, and so that kind of that journey of that really like introspection and really just trying to figure out like, "What what is my voice here? What What is this going to look like long term?" I decided to take a trip to Costa Rica for my 40th birthday. It was a yoga retreat. And I wanted, it was so funny like I was telling a story the other day that my my original plan to go for my 40th was to like get this whole group of people, we're going to go to Cabo, we're going to get a house, you're doing all the friggin' things. (Lesley: You're gonna party like it was Austin) ... (Lesley laughs) It was happening. And you know as I got closer and closer to it and in the middle of everything that was going on in my life, I was just like that's not that's not what I need right now. I need to just figure some stuff out and so I ended up going to, yeah, I ended up going to Costa Rica and I really wanted to use this time as like just some time to just really think and so I I'll never forget and I was tell the story because it was really just a, you know, I'll say I think that there are pivotal times in our life that we look back and we're like, boom, like that mess... that was like divine intervention. That was a message that I heard loud and clear, if you're open to receiving (Lesley: Yeah) that message. (Lesley: Yeah) And so, on this trip, I was sitting on the beach, and I was meditating and I was just journaling. And I was brain dumping and I was thinking of like, just all the things that you know... and I was really centered around like, also with my career, like, what did I want to do for my career, and I'm just writing down all the things that I was good at, and that I loved and that, and all of a sudden, it sounds like such a simple word. But it was so loud and so clear, I couldn't deny it, all of a sudden, the word "coach" just hit me. I was like, "Coach," I was like, "Coach of what? Like, what the f..., what am I going to coach? I gotta..." You know? And I just sat with it for a while and the rest of the trip. And I decided when I got back that I'm so fascinated by integrative nutrition, because I'd lost my father several years back to cancer. And so I really became very fascinated with holistic treatment, Eastern medicine and all of that. And so I was like, "You know, what, I don't know what this looks like, but I'm gonna get back, I'm gonna enroll in this program." And, and I also true for me, I think it gave me a little bit of relief, because I needed something that I could start focusing my attention on as well, because I was so consumed on like, what was going on with my marriage. (Lesley: Yeah) And really, like things, just the things just evolved with the, you know, reopened my personal training certification and the nutrition and all of that. And then one came TikTok, and then that then that was the end of it. (Amber laughs) Because my I got on TikTok, when the pandemic hit after I launched my business. And that's really how things got going for me, I just started, like, really putting out content that talked about my struggles and really identity like, you know, related to women over 40. And the things we go through and like random stray hairs on her chin and hormones. And you know how hard it is to keep the weight off. And all these things, and women just started resonating with it. And it just, yeah, kind of started building a community.Lesley Logan 17:02  This is so cool. I actually, I completely agree that there are moments in our life that like are really transformative. They're very pivotable, pivotable, pivotal... I don't know, whatever (Lesley: You got it) that's a great word. Anyway, no one's here for the English lesson. Um ...Amber Shaw 17:16  I'm a queen of that by the way, I make up words all the time. And like my ex husband is like in he's like the master of English. And I'm like, he's like that, you know, it's not a word, right ...Lesley Logan 17:23  Oh, oh, Brad, I I'm the queen of double negatives, really and Brad hates that. But if y'all want to see blooper reels, my team secretly edits out, you know, all of my YouTube videos where I do things, and I'm like, "Da, da, da, da" (Lesley and Amber laughs) and they did put a compilation. I'm like, "Eww" (Lesley laughs) (Amber: Say what...) Anyway, people love it. But going back to that, I think we, I think it's so easy to go, "Why is this happening to me? How did I let this happen?" We end up taking like this, like we're supposed to have seen this train coming. And, and really like, those are the moments that really transform us and put us on the path we're supposed to be on. And actually those those rock bottoms or obstacles are what people relate to us as. Like people, you are able to share those struggles with people people go, "Yeah, I feel that way too. I went through that too." And so I think sometimes we're like, "Let me bury that, let me not think about that. I want to go as far away from that as possible." And really like those are the things that build us up for what's to come and who we're going to be and like what we're supposed to do here. So thank you for sharing that. And I hope that like if you're listening to this, and you can think back, like, at a moment where you heard something so clearly, and it changed something like, I I am doing what I'm doing today, because people asked a question I just happened to go, "Huh! That's an interesting question. I just, I just suggest that that's" so you know what I mean? So I'm with you. Lesley Logan 18:51  When it comes to, let's talk a little bit about health nutrition for a second because I, we're here about being until we see it. And I definitely want to get more into your story on that. But I feel that there are things that we eat, do, or don't do, or don't eat, that are actually keeping us from, from being that person. Like I actually feel that sometimes we are could be the most confident person in the morning and by the end of the day, we're not... and it's not as because we're like talking negatively to ourselves. Sometimes it's like sugar or something else. Is there are there things that we are eating or not eating that are actually causing us to not be able to be that confident, strong person, we're all trying to be in this world?Amber Shaw 19:33  Man, there's so many there's so many like different ways I could take this one. So like on a physiological level, like and I think this is something that definitely plagues a lot of women. And then I want to get to kind of the mental level on that. But like on the physiological level, like one of the biggest things I see is women that under eat and you just have no idea when you are starving your body eating less than 1200 calories a day. Um, because you think that that is what's going to help you to lose weight which in actuality, it's actually the thing that's preventing you from losing weight because you're starving your body. But yeah, I mean, that's absolutely just gonna affect your energy a lot, you know, you're usually not your best self, when you're in, you don't even realize what your baseline is. Because you've been in, you don't even realize where you're at, because that's been your baseline for so long. So, you know, definitely, I'm just like a physical level, I think that yeah, like, definitely under eating, I also think just even getting too much sugar in your diet, I think definitely affects you, you know, by having, you know, crashes, sugar crashes, where you again, lose your energy, you know, increases your brain fog, I mean, there's just lots of things when you are mistreating your body and not eating a lot of whole foods, you know, I always talk about the power of I'm using food as medicine, that's one of the things that I talk about, especially for my, my ladies and even the 30s, 40s and up is that, you know, we really do have the opportunity to heal our bodies so much, so much with food. And so one of the most important things you can do for your body is stop looking at food as calories in and calories out, you know, like, really start to pay attention to the power of food. So, I would say that. And then you know, what I would say too, is at least from a mental game, and you asked, like, are there things that we're, you know, eating or not eating or whatever, that really affects us from being our best self - is that kind of what you're... yeah... (Lesley: Yeah), you know, I think the that constantly being on a restrictive diet absolutely affects your mental game and the way that you feel about yourself and because so much of what, you know, goes hand in hand with constantly being on a diet and constantly looking for that quick fix. You know, to shed the weight is, you know, the the cycle of restriction and bingeing right, and, and what happens, anybody that's ever been on a diet or restrictive diet, where, which you can't stick to because nobody can, because it's not real life, then what happens you either binge, or you kind of like, go off the program and you feel terrible about yourself. (Lesley: Right) And you feel terrible about how the way you look at yourself in the mirror. Now, you don't want to go to the pool, because you don't want to you know, you feel terrible, you're by yourself and not confident in your clothes. I mean, so I just definitely think that yes, I mean, so much of food and our relationships, our relationship to food dictates our ability to be our best selves on so many different levels.Lesley Logan 22:24  Couldn't... I agree so much because I, you said, well, I still have stomach issues. They're pretty much on the mend. But when I was trying to go and figure out what my stomach issues were, I was put on all these different diets. I had an elimination diet, which went on way too long. Someone let me be on that for 90 days. It was terrible, it's ... it was awful. And you just like I was so consumed with like, "Can I eat that? Can I eat this? Can I eat that," that I wasn't able to work on the things that I was really wanting to work on? I wasn't able to work on my book. I wasn't able to work on my courses. I just because you're just so much like you only have so ... many decision. Right!Amber Shaw 23:02  And it's decision fatigue. (Lesley: Correct) ... Jill you know, Jill Coleman talks a lot about this in her you know, Moderation 365 which teaches a more sustainable lifestyle. But there really is such a thing like decision fatigue and it's like if you you don't even realize that but you when you are putting so much of your brainpower into like, "Can I eat this? Can I eat that? How many macros are in that? How many calories are in that?" You don't even know, you don't even know how much it is really detract you know, taking away from your living, your life, your joy. I mean, it's until you get out of it. (Lesley: Yeah) You get out and you're like, "Damn, that was a lot."Lesley Logan 23:36  Yeah, I agree. So how, so... How have you helped women get out of this? Because I feel like they're like, "Great, ladies. Okay, how do I get out of this?" Like, how do what is your like, what what do you suggest people do? Because it's not easy to do on your own. Like if you you know, because it's a pattern ... it is a it's a habit almost, you know,Amber Shaw 23:54  No, I mean absolutely. And I think why it's it is so hard is because there's so much information out there. There's so much misinformation out there and then you couple it with the fact that people want results now, because we're up against you know, body manipulative diets like keto and you know, all these other things where you're cutting out whole food groups, and all of that is that so yeah, it's hard to stay consistent. But I have to say that really, consistency really is the name of the game. Like if you are somebody that is like tired of dieting, you are wanting to you know, create a lifestyle where you have food freedom, where you can go on vacation and not worry about every morsel you put in your mouth, all these things. It really does start with a more consistent lifestyle. So when I teach women, women come to me and they're ready to raise up the dieting like they want, they want to eat more food, they just want to be happy. You know, I do educate women, I'm more of a clean eating lifestyle, which is basically just eliminating a lot of the processed and packaged foods, not cutting them out completely... that would be restriction and that is not possible, right? But for the most part, really relying more on a whole food diet eating foods again, less process less people. Paying attention to the sugar in your diet, getting more vegetables, more good fats like, what I would say is the way that I teach nutrition is not really rocket science, it makes sense. It's things you learned when you were in like the fifth grade. But it is like it is really more about learning that. But then learning how to couple it with moderation and satisfaction, because the two of them like that those two together clean eating and like moderation, satisfaction in like what you're eating and not doing the bingeing and doing this all the time with being on a diet on Monday and then gorging on the weekend and all that, that is really when you can develop a lifestyle where you're going to keep the weight off for good. So, I really, because if you don't, if you don't teach yourself, how to trust yourself around food, again, how to be able to go out in a Friday night and have pizza and beer and all the things you like, and then just, you know, kind of get back, you know, your to your normal routine on Saturday. Like if you don't learn that, then you just do clean eating. It's just another diet, (Lesley: Yeah) like that's just another day. (Lesley: Yeah) So the secret sauce, I think is really learning, again, how to kind of that moderation satisfaction factor so that you can stay consistent because you know, Jill always says, and Jill Coleman is a mentor of both ours and Jill (Lesley: Yeah) and always says, "That a little less perfect, makes you a lot more consistent." And I'm like, ...Lesley Logan 26:24  Oh, I love that because our big thing around (Amber: Right?) here is, "Perfect is boring."Amber Shaw 26:27  So okay, so see, like, ... and it's so true. We focus so much on being consistent. I mean, perfect all the time. That not totally jacks up our ability to be consistent. So yeah for sure.Lesley Logan 26:39  Oh, you're 100%. So okay, I love that. And I just want to quickly get back to something because I'm sure a lot of people like okay, so you are a mom, you have two kids, right? (Amber: Two kids. Yeah) Two kids and you switched careers. (Amber: Yeah) And you went through divorce. So (Amber: Yeah) all this happens. So they're wondering, how did you do this? Like, how did you how because that's a lot of change. And that's a lot of I feel like that'd be a lot of pressure. I don't have children but like, I feel like going through all of that with two kiddos is probably like extra. So what what what were you telling yourself each day? How did you do that?Amber Shaw 27:15  You know, I think and I'll give the overall answer and then I'll kind of go back and kind of break it down a little bit. But I think that the universe or God or spirit or whatever, if you believe in a higher power, what you believe at that. But I think the message from God was so loud to me that I couldn't deny it anymore. And to deny this path would be to deny myself and so I couldn't, He had opened up us here to open up so many doors for me with this coaching in such a short amount of time. Because you're right, I was at that time I was in at that point. I started the coaching it really is like a side hustle because I was like, "Okay, I'm going through a divorce. I need something that will take my attention. This will also be extra income for me," because I mean, I was making multiple six figures at my sales job, very cush shell sales job. (Lesley: Yeah) Okay, to do it in my sleep. (Lesley: Yeah.) But I had a very, and it was actually just that just probably about eight months ago, I had a very good conversation with my brother. And you know, because I was like, because for most of last year, I was doing both (Lesley: Okay) I was doing coaching and my sale... and I was dying. (Lesley: Yeah) I was literally dying. I was like, I can't, I'm working unbelievable amount of hours. And but you know, like I said, my... this conversation with my brother. And also a lot of time going inward and really, you know, thinking on this, but, you know, we had just decided that again, I had had so many just things that have just happened that I did not feel were coincidence that it was like "Okay, I'm gonna trust this" like, I can always this is scary as hell, this is scary as hell. But I can always go back to being a salesperson, right? Even if I'm like, sell, you know, no, even ... sell and making the a $30,000. I don't care. Like I can always go back. I know that I can do that. But I feel like I if I walk away from this now, I will always wonder if this could have been my thing. And again, like I said, I mean to at that point, it was like to deny myself of this was to just really deny, I think, my soul's work. I really feel that.Lesley Logan 29:16  Oh, that's amazing. Thank you for sharing that because I do know that there are someone listening to this going. They're wondering, you know, like, it's hard. Like I had a job that was salaried, vacation, health insurance, all the things and I could I just was struggling so much because I knew that I wanted to do other things. I wanted to get my retreats going consistently. I wanted to coach people. I wanted to have more freedom in my decisions without having... it felt like such a hard thing because of the safe job that made me really good money (Lesley laughs) (Amber: Yes) and all these perks and benefits. But I remember someone said, you know, it was not even having to do with me, she said it around something that had to do with how it was a Pilates classes, she even know that she was saying something. But she said, "You can't have one foot an island and one foot on a canoe." Like you just can't. Doesn't work. (Amber: Right. Right. Absolutely) And I was like, "Oh my God, I have one foot on an island and one foot in a canoe," (Amber: Yeah) and like, I don't have the ability to do the splits, like, I'm just, that's not how I'm built. (Lesley laughs) Okay, Amber, how do people follow you? Obviously, TikTok is one of them. Where are you there? What's your favorite places to hang out?Amber Shaw 30:28  Yeah, so definitely on TikTok. That platform is my jam. Yes, I'm Ms Amber Shaw. I'm Ms Amber Shaw on TikTok, also the same on Instagram, I'm ever on Instagram. And I also have a podcast. (Lesley: Yes, she does.) Yeah, The Wellness Revolution. I'm so excited about it. So um, you can find that on Apple or Spotify. And then of course, my website, ambershaw.com.Lesley Logan 30:51  Amazing. Okay. Y'all, make sure you follow her, check out her podcast. I'm also on it. So you know, (Amber: Yeah.) (Lesley laughs) (Amber: Thank you) So, here's what I love to do. All this is really great. I know, we got so much inspo going on. But I really I'm an actionable strategy person. I like people to be able to take action because I know action brings clarity. It's the antidote to fear, it also helps us remain too perfect. I don't like to plan too much. You got to just try things on. So what, what do you have for us? What are some ways that people can be it till they see it?Amber Shaw 31:23  You know, I think the first thing is that when you are going through something, I think it's okay to ask yourself, "Why, why am I going through this?" But I think the most important thing is to not stop there. I think then it's to flip the script and say now, "How can I turn this into something good?" Or or what ask the question, "What is the purpose in this? What kind of what lesson can I learn here?" And I think that really is where your growth is going to happen. So I think that's that's one thing. And then I think the second thing is, and it is actually you know, goes along with that. And when you're asking yourself these questions is take some damn time to yourself. I don't care if it is not everybody has to go to a beach in Costa Rica. I don't care if it's going in your closet and putting some earplugs in for five minutes - all you moms - you just do it, give yourself permission to be with your own thoughts. I can tell you that I have worked out some of my biggest decisions of my life during those quiet moments. So don't deny yourself of those.Lesley Logan 32:27  Oh my God, I'm in love. I'm in love. All of ... those are so great. These are so great. I can't wait to hear what which ones y'all do, so do us a massive favor, screenshot this podcast, tag @msambershaw, and @be_it_pod with which takeaway you have from this podcast and share it because not only does it tell Amber and I what you loved about this, but it's going to change people's lives. I know that if all of us are be it till we see it, we change this world. So thank you, Amber for being here. (Amber: Thank you) Thank you for listening everyone and until next time, Be It Till You See It.Lesley Logan 33:01  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!Lesley Logan 33:29  'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell 33:33  It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 33:41  Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.Brad Crowell 33:47  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 33:55  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.Brad Crowell 34:07  And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

It's no secret our bodies go through changes as we get older.  Perimenopause and menopause can leave us with symptoms that make us feel like we're in someone else's body, we might struggle to maintain our wellness and feel good when it feels like our bodies have their own plan- and they do! It's normal and natural for our bodies to change as we get older. But that doesn't mean we can't take care of them well- it's never too late to take charge of your health and start loving the skin you're in. Today's guest, Amber Shaw is on a mission to help you get off the crazy train of dieting and find true food freedom so you can feel empowered, confident and sexy in your skin.  Amber share her story of hitting rock bottom, picking herself back up, better than before- and becoming a coach to other women, along the way. Connect with Amber: WebsiteInstagramTik TokConnect with Kris:WebsiteInstagramCooking Classes

In this episode, I had the pleasure to share some space with Amber Shaw. Amber and I talked all about her story, how she trusted the process and her journey into creating Wellness Revolutions for women. We share many concepts on what we all face when it comes to facing difficulty but knowing that we are in the right place at the right time for MASSIVE growth. Tune in below! ------------------------------------------- Who is Amber Shaw? Amber is the Founder of The Wellness Revolution, a leading global movement for thousands of women to empower them to rediscover their confidence and create a body that looks as good as if feels!  As a Nationally Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach and a Certified Personal Trainer, Amber is committed to overhauling the diet culture so women have the support and accountability they need to change their lives.  Amber is also a motivational speaker, philanthropist and internationally recognized authority in the health and wellness industry.  Her mission is to help millions of women heal their relationship with food and themselves while empowering them to transform their lives, love their bodies and create lasting results. How to Connect with Amber? Website: www.AmberShaw.com Instagram: www.Instagram.com/msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw Facebook: www.Facebook.com/msambershaw ------------------------------------------- Connect with Dr. Vic... Website: www.EmpowerYourReality.com Facebook: www.Facebook.com/drvicmanzo Instagram: www.Instagram.com/drvicmanzo LinkedIn: www.LinkedIn.com/in/drmanzo   Check out my books: https://amzn.to/3gzr9XT   Do You Want to DOUBLE Your Profits while leading a SOUL-FULL Life?  Let's jump on a FREE 30-minute call... www.callwithdrvic.com   About Dr. Vic... I'm Dr. Vic Manzo Jr., a Pediatric/Family Wellness Chiropractor, Holistic Practitioner, Transformational Mindset Coach, Influential Author, Inspirational Speaker, and the host and creator of The Mindful Experiment Podcast. I teach entrepreneurs how to DOUBLE their profits while working less in 90 days! Check out my socials and if interesting in a discovery call with me, visit www.TheProsperousMindExperience.com.

  How to eat healthy. and still feel satisfied understand your body over 40 What to means to feel confident and sexy, what is food freedom, how to balance your physical, emotional and spiritual wellbeing Amber is a Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution. Amber has extensively coached thousands of women (age 40+) from all across the world to get off the crazy train of dieting and find true food freedom so they can feel empowered, confident, and sexy. Amber has spent the majority of her life being what most would call “in shape” while struggling with body image issues. It wasn't until her 30's when her father passed away, her marriage fell apart and she ultimately lost herself that she hit rock bottom. Through self-care, nutritious foods and a manageable fitness routine, Amber was able to go from a life of barely surviving to thriving and now she's helping other women do the same. You can find Amber at: https://ambershaw.com    

Hustle Like A Mother podcast is hosted by Taylor Mobley - a blogger & business coach for mama entrepreneurs.  Listen in on the conversations she has with other successful mothers-in-business while they chat growing your business, balancing motherhood, and maintaining healthy mental mindsets through it all. Walk away feeling more prepared than ever before to elevate your business, chase your passions and raise your babies. We discuss Amber's past, her store and how her business journey got off the ground - and then we talk about what a healthy and sustainable life can actually, feasibly look for busy moms. Amber also talked about "food freedom" and what it means to actually change your life vs just jumping on the diet train. You can find Amber HERE.

Welcome to episode 100, a monumental moment for us! At The Confident Podcast, we take pride in everyday podcast so this new season, growth for us is exciting - so of course we had to talk about body confidence to kick us off episode 100! In this episode, our host Lisa sits down with Amber Shaw, a Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution to talk about body confidence... and I mean all the things when it comes to it. Amber shares about how she use to talk to her body and shaming it, the dieting life which was self destruction for her and provides hope for women who are struggling to love their bodies and be proud of it. Starting today.. we want you to rock your body and be confident in it! - Follow us on Instagram @theconfidentpodcast - Follow our host Lisa on Instagram @lisathompsonofficial - Follow our guest Amber on Instagram @msambershaw

Amber Shaw is a Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution. She has extensively coached thousands of women (age 40+) from all across the world to get off the crazy train of dieting and find true food freedom so they can feel empowered, confident and sexy. Amber has spent the majority of her life being what most would call “in shape” while struggling with body image issues. It wasn't until her 30's when her father passed away, her marriage fell apart and she ultimately lost herself that she hit rock bottom. However, through self care, nutritious foods and a manageable fitness routine, Amber was able to go from a life of barely surviving to thriving and now she's helping other women do the same. On this episode we discuss her mission with The Wellness Revolution, the negative effects of "yo-yo" dieting, making healthy food choices, leveraging Tik Tok for business owners, creating a community, and much more! 

Today we have special guest Amber Shaw. Amber is a Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution. Amber has extensively coached thousands of women (age 40+) from all across the world to get off the crazy train of dieting and find true food freedom so they can feel empowered, confident and sexy. Amber has spent the majority of her life being what most would call “in shape” while struggling with body image issues. It wasn't until her 30's when her father passed away, her marriage fell apart and she ultimately lost herself that she hit rock bottom. Through self care, nutritious foods and a manageable fitness routine, Amber was able to go from a life of barely surviving to thriving and now she's helping other women do the same. In this episode we're talking about getting off the crazy diet train, transforming our relationships with our bodies and mindset, and building an empowering business that transforms lives. Jumpstart your 30 day fat loss with Amber, check out her new program here. You can connect with Amber @msambershaw on Instagram and Tiktok, check out her services and magic at ambershaw.com and her podcast The Wellness Revolution. I love to stay connected, let's be friends and you can easily reach out to me on Instagram @maryalvizures__ . You can also access all my latest FREE trainings at bit.ly/bizandbrandsuccesskit

Welcome to the Wellness Revolution Podcast with Amber Shaw! In this opening episode, Amber shares with you how she dealt with her insecurities growing up on account of not feeling happy with her body and how that eventually led to eating disorders. Amber also shares the pivotal moment in her life where she went on a self-discovery trip and eventually had an insight on what the next steps could be for her. It is really a self-development exercise to be ok with being uncomfortable and learning from it. It is also a good thing to be afraid of pursuing a goal and taking risks because this insecurity will be the number #1 motivator to move forward. You will know that you're on the right path if your drive and willingness are greater than your fear.   Wellness Quote “I realized very quickly that my mission in my life was to help women heal their relationship with their bodies.” – Amber Shaw    Connect with Amber Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com

Chandra and Amanda to talk to body transformation and wellness coach Amber Shaw. AMBER SHAW is a Body Transformation Expert, Founder of The Wellness Revolution, Motivational Speaker, and Internationally Recognized Authority in the Health and Wellness Industry.  Amber is the founder of wellness revolution a leading global movement for thousands of women to empower them to rediscover their confidence and create a body that looks as good as it feels.  Show Notes 00:42 - Introduction. 02:46 - How my wellness journey started. 08:40 - You can change your body even after kids. 12:40 - Our bodies change with age how do we maintain wellness. 15:50 - What is the quality of food you're putting into your body? 18:45 - Get a coach to know your body style. 20:10 - Consistency is key. 22:39 - Supplements, vitamins and minerals. 30:00 - What is the deal with the lower body fat? 36:26- Pay attention to the labels. 45:05 - Being a little less perfect is going to make you much more consistent. Support this podcast

This week I have a very special guest from Atlanta, Georgia. Amber Shaw is a Body Transformation Expert and Founder of The Wellness Revolution. Amber has extensively coached thousands of women (age 40+) from all across the world to get off the crazy train of dieting and find true food freedom so they can feel empowered, confident and sexy. Amber has spent the majority of her life being what most would call “in shape” while struggling with body image issues. It wasn't until her 30's when her father passed away, her marriage fell apart and she ultimately lost herself that she hit rock bottom. Through self care, nutritious foods and a manageable fitness routine, Amber was able to go from a life of barely surviving to thriving and now she's helping other women do the same. I loved talking with her and I think you'll get a lot out of what she has to say. If you want to find her online - @msambershaw or www.ambershaw.com --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thewellnessglow/message

Kristin & Alyssa talk with Amber Shaw, a recent student in The BECOMING a Mother online series of classes, about some fears she had with her second pregnancy and why she took this course.

Today I'm chatting with Amber Shaw. Amber is a nationally board certified health and wellness coach with a specialization in integrative nutrition. Amber helps women over 40 get off the crazy train of dieting and learn to live a lifestyle of moderation without deprivation. She teaches women how to use food as medicine to shed the weight, balance hormones, fight disease and feel confident in their skin again. We're talking all about; Amber's story and relationship with dieting and how it led to her becoming body transformation expert and coach to women. How Amber became a Tik Tok sensation, with over 200,000 followers! Why Amber is so passionation about helping women over 40 heal their relationship with food and themselves. Empowering women to feel strong and sexy in their skin at any age And So Much More... Are you ready? Let's go! Want to connect with Amber online? You can find her at: www.ambershaw.com Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw I would love to connect with you and hear what you thought about today's episode! Come join me over on instagram @iam_carolelizabeth send me a DM I want to hear about your morning routine! What do you do that is just for you? You can also head over to my website carolelizabeth.com and record a little question and leave it for me and we can chat about it. You can also text the word “tribe” to (404)-737-1037 and tell me what you want me to talk about. Ask me a question and I will answer it right here on the show.

Today I'm chatting with Amber Shaw.  Amber is a nationally board certified health and wellness coach with a specialization in integrative nutrition. Amber helps women over 40  get off the crazy train of dieting and learn to live a lifestyle of moderation without deprivation. She teaches women how to use food as medicine to shed the weight, balance hormones, fight disease and feel confident in their skin again. We're talking all about; Amber's story and relationship with dieting and how it led to her becoming body transformation expert and coach to women.  How Amber became a Tik Tok sensation, with over 200,000 followers! Why Amber is so passionation about helping women over 40 heal their relationship with food and themselves. Empowering women to feel strong and sexy in their skin at any age   And So Much More... Are you ready? Let's go! Want to connect with Amber online? You can find her at: www.ambershaw.com Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw I would love to connect with you and hear what you thought about today’s episode! Come join me over on instagram @iam_carolelizabeth send me a DM I want to hear about your morning routine! What do you do that is just for you? You can also head over to my website carolelizabeth.com and record a little question and leave it for me and we can chat about it. You can also text the word “tribe” to (404)-737-1037 and tell me what you want me to talk about. Ask me a question and I will answer it right here on the show. 

A few years ago I had the opportunity to meet Mr. Tanner Gary. I learned that he was from Arkansas and that he made his home in Houston, Texas. I invited him to join me at my Gospel Celebration of Praise in the Park in Ardmore, Oklahoma. He blessed us in a mighty way. Recently I got the call that God had called him home. Yes it was a sad day. However I know that he is now singing in the Heavenly Choir. Thank you Amber Shaw for the interview and opening that door to a great relationship. Cedric Bailey, National Radio Host www.musicalsoulfood.com