Podcast appearances and mentions of lauren zoeller

Lesley and Brad recap inspiring conversation with boudoir photographer Shayla Pelton, exploring how her unique approach to photography encourages individuals to reclaim their confidence and embrace their true selves. Together, they discuss the powerful role self-care and energy work play in self-empowerment—and why a boudoir photoshoot can be an empowering gift you give to yourself.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:The impact of boudoir photography on self-confidence and self-acceptance.The therapeutic benefits of seeing oneself through a professional lens.How small self-care habits can lead to improved mental well-being.The importance of releasing generational trauma and cultivating personal growth.Highlights of the upcoming OPC tour and its mission to foster community within the Pilates world.Episode References/Links:Cambodia February 2025 Retreat - https://crowsnestretreats.comFlashcards Waitlist - https://opc.me/flashcardwaitlistPilates Studio Growth Accelerator - https://prfit.biz/acceleratorOPC Winter Tour - https://opc.me/tourEp. 5 Amy Ledin - https://beitpod.com/ep5Ep. 421 Dr. Louise Swartswalter - https://beitpod.com/421Ep. 175 Keri Ford - https://beitpod.com/ep175Ep. 388 Lauren Zoeller - https://beitpod.com/ep388Ep. 298 Michael Unbroken - https://beitpod.com/ep298 If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS!Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox Be in the know with all the workshops at OPCBe It Till You See It Podcast SurveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates MentorshipFREE Ditching Busy WebinarResources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Follow Us on Social Media:InstagramThe Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channelFacebookLinkedInThe OPC YouTube Channel Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  I'm a big fan. And now I think everyone should go do a boudoir photoshoot. I think I should do one. Brad Crowell 0:05  I'm in. Lesley Logan 0:06  I know you are. Brad Crowell 0:08  Sign me up.Lesley Logan 0:10  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 0:51  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to. What are we doing? Brad Crowell 0:57  We're digging into the boldly confident convo that Lesley have with Shayla Pelton in her last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that, go back and listen to it now or don't, but we think you should, because it's a great episode. Lesley Logan 1:10  She's so fun. Brad Crowell 1:11  She's great. Lesley Logan 1:12  She's so sweet. I don't know why all of a sudden I forgot the script. So, thanks, Brad, thanks for having my. Brad Crowell 1:17  Oh, I got you. Lesley Logan 1:18  Okay, guys, Today is November 14th 2024 and it's Loosen Up Lighten Up Day, aka LULU day. Brad Crowell 1:24  LULU. Lesley Logan 1:24  And I chose this because we're recording this before the election. We are after the election, and we have no idea what shenanigans are happening around in some shitty places, so we are loosening it up and lightening up, just in case. Brad Crowell 1:35  We're LULUing. Lesley Logan 1:36  If you've been looking for a break from all of your stress and troubles, Loosen Up Lighten Up (LULU) on November 14 is perfect for you. This day presents an opportunity for you to take a break from your usual busy schedule and all the stressful thoughts and instead focus on just being happy and relaxed and having fun.Brad Crowell 1:36  I mean, I think this is very appropriate, because I have a feeling a lot of shenanigans are happening right now. Lesley Logan 1:59  I know. LULU day is our cure for burnouts and breakdowns. I just love that line. It's like a, it's like a medication. LULU is your cure for burnouts and breakdowns. Brad Crowell 2:11  I'm LULUing. Lesley Logan 2:12  You guys, we don't, we don't know, but we have a feeling that we all need a LULU today. And you know, so at any rate.Brad Crowell 2:19  The only thing I can say that makes me confidently LULU is that one of the two candidates raised a billion dollars in the last quarter and has money to fight legal battles. Because that's the shenanigans that are probably happening right now. Lesley Logan 2:32  No one, no one. Here's the thing. Everyone's like, what is your hobby? And I, we never tell them. And clearly what it is is we are deeply involved. We are ridiculously involved. And if you didn't know that, Brad even more so because he listens to world podcasts that I just don't have the time to take in all of that. But we know the names of too many people in too many places, and the district and the court numbers. We know all the different court levels, district nine, we know too fucking much. And so we are trying to LULU around here. Brad Crowell 3:01  We're LULUing. Lesley Logan 3:01  Yeah. Anyways, our Cambodia retreat we just got back from we were so relaxed. The relaxation is gone, but our lives are changed forever in the best way. And I can tell you, having the memories of Cambodia to reflect on and these weird times is fucking great. It's so great. It's amazing. I have to look back and go, wow, that was fabulous just to be on the other side of the world and not actually be thinking about what is going on back home. It's a way to LULU all the time. It's so wonderful. It's so fabulous. And so we want you to come with us, because you will LULU as well, and you will get to see amazing temples, and we'll do breath work, and we'll have great breakfast and great lunch and great dinner. And then we (inaudible). We find ourselves at a lovely bar sometimes together. We do nightly massages. One night there was 14 of us getting a massage together. So, you know, and not, like, with, like, not in the same room, (inaudible) but yeah. So you should be, you should come, crowsnestretreats.com is where you're gonna get your tickets. Brad Crowell 4:04  Yeah, crowsnestretreats.com. Lesley Logan 4:05  Join us for February. Don't go I'll go next time. Oh, this, you will always have an excuse not to go. I promise you, you'll be so happy you went, and you will change your life. Brad Crowell 4:13  It's true. Lesley Logan 4:14  And now I'm even closer to my little week-long excursion living in LA to get ready and do the accessories photo shoot. The Accessories Deck is our sixth deck in all of the flashcards. If this is your first time listening, you probably have no idea what our flashcards are. We have Pilates flashcards and you, too, can get some. Brad Crowell 4:32  And you, too. Lesley Logan 4:33  The Accessories Deck is the sixth deck in the series. And then from here, Brad gets to design the collector's box. So for those of you who thought you weren't gonna get a discount when you bought all six, I promise you, you're not. I promise you, Brad is going to figure out a Harry Potter like, collector's box. Brad Crowell 4:49  Yeah. The flashcards come with a magic wand. Lesley Logan 4:52  I don't like to be involved in the design of this box. I just would like to say, because I do think it should have a way to, like, pull the card out.Brad Crowell 5:00  Oh no. I think it's gonna, like be a glass display case.Lesley Logan 5:03  But it needs to, so you you will see all the cards, all the boxes, beautifully, but then there needs to be a way for you to have a card of the day, or like this week's exercise. There needs to be a way. Brad Crowell 5:14  To put one card, feature a card? Lesley Logan 5:16  Feature a card. I mean, that could be cool. And then what would also be cool is a little hidden hook. So if someone is doing those little drop pouches, they could hook that on and it could, like, they (inaudible) with their workout on it. Brad Crowell 5:27  Yeah, we're asking a lot of our display case here. We'll see.Lesley Logan 5:30  This is, we're in the design phase. We're in the design phase. Brad Crowell 5:34  LED lights inside. Lesley Logan 5:36  All the different colors?Brad Crowell 5:37  Maybe. We'll see what we can figure out.Lesley Logan 5:39  All the OPC colors? Brad Crowell 5:40  I don't know. I don't know. We'll figure it out. Lesley Logan 5:42  What if it's just, what if it's a disco ball and it is like.Brad Crowell 5:47  All right, well, if you have ideas, we'd love to hear them.Lesley Logan 5:51  Is there a site for, like, display cases? We got to figure this out. Anyways, we will work on that. After the sixth deck is done, I'm doing the photoshoot, go to flashcard waitlist opc.me/flashcardwaitlist and that will get you on the presale waitlist, the secret waitlist, and only the people on the waitlist get the presale invite. That's how it goes. Brad Crowell 6:07  That's true. Lesley Logan 6:08  And our goal is to get the presale out sooner so we beat the hurricane season. Okay, Brad, take it away. Brad Crowell 6:14  Okay, cool. So I want you, if you are a Pilates business owner, what (inaudible) Lesley Logan 6:19  That's the way the bear says only you. Brad Crowell 6:21  I want only you, stand up and serve your country.Lesley Logan 6:26  That was, yeah, very much so.Brad Crowell 6:28  If you are, if you have a Pilates business, if you take clients at all, big, small, medium, long time, short time, not yet time but know you're going to take clients in the future, I want you to come join me for a free webinar called the Pilates Studio Growth Accelerator, where Lesley and I have boiled down three of the the biggest things that we've learned in how do you actually move the needle with your income? Okay? So if you're feeling stuck at all with like, I've been at the same income level, I thought I was going to be able to make more money, or I thought I was going to be able to have the life that I always wanted when I worked for myself. We can get you unstuck. Come join me for this free webinar. Go to prfit.biz/accelerator. That's profit without the O, dot biz slash accelerator, and come check it out. We're gonna be, we're gonna be hanging out. It's only an hour long, and I'll get you a In-N-Out before your class.Lesley Logan 7:22  There's only a couple opportunities before you go on winter tour. Brad Crowell 7:26  That's very true. Lesley Logan 7:27  So take advantage of that while it's happening, because you don't want to wait until the new year and then start the new year late, guys. So opc.me/tour, is where you get your tickets. But we're going to 23 cities. We kick off on December 6th. And we start in Sedona, then Oklahoma City, then we go to Memphis, and then to Huntsville, and then we go to Greensboro. Brad Crowell 7:51  Atlanta and then Greensboro. Lesley Logan 7:52  Oh Atlanta, Greensboro, DC. Brad Crowell 7:55  Hershey, Pennsylvania. Lesley Logan 7:56  Virginia Beach.Brad Crowell 7:58  I think that's on the way south. Lesley Logan 7:59  Oh, it's on the way South? Brad Crowell 8:00  Yeah, because I think it's too close to DC, so I think we go Virginia Beach on the way down. Lesley Logan 8:04  Okay, so then it's Hershey, then it's Portland, Maine, then it is Boston, Cape Cod, Providence, Greenwich, then it's Virginia Beach, then it's Charleston, South Miami, Tampa, Pensacola, New Orleans, Austin, Dallas, Lubbock, Phoenix. I don't think we skipped any this time. Brad Crowell 8:28  I think we got them all. Lesley Logan 8:29  I did Oklahoma City, yeah, okay, we're great. 23 cities, over 40 events. So many are sold out. Brad Crowell 8:34  Almost 50 events, yeah, they're literally already selling all out, y'all. So if you are just hearing about this now, go to opc.me/tour and jump on this, because. Lesley Logan 8:49  Pilates lovers of all levels. If you're brand new and you've just been Pi Curious, come, come, come. Come join us. Brad Crowell 8:55  Well, I'm just excited. I can't believe how. Lesley Logan 8:58  How excited everyone is. Brad Crowell 8:59  How excited, yeah, the vibes are strong, okay? So come, don't sit on this, because there might not be anywhere left.Lesley Logan 9:06  And also, if you're like, oh, I work at this studio and you're having other studio, get your ass over there. It's called community, okay? Brad Crowell 9:11  It's called community, y'all. Come across the road. (inaudible)Lesley Logan 9:14  Yeah. Do it because here's the deal, no one's gonna be like, oh, my God, that's like, working in that studio. They're gonna be focused on I'm there. Okay?Brad Crowell 9:24  Yeah. Well, it is true. Lesley Logan 9:25  They're actually focused on I'm there and we're gonna have fun. And I'm tired of people feeling like, oh, I can't do that. They teach like this. I can't, I don't teach like that. It. Brad Crowell 9:34  Nobody gives a shit. Lesley Logan 9:35  No one does because it's called community and I am on a mission to make sure Pilates lovers meet each other all over the place, and we have so much fun, and it's quite like reunions, and you'll see people you haven't seen in a long time. (inaudible) So come, come, come, bring your friends. All right, that's opc.me/tour to get your ticket. We do have an audience question. Brad Crowell 9:53  We do. Lesley Logan 9:54  It is in your text messages, Brad.Brad Crowell 9:56  It is, it is. The question is actually from @SL4081, how is the MOTR Core Balanced Body equipment for Pilates?Lesley Logan 10:09  I think it's like the MOTR piece of equipment for Pilates. I think that's what they're asking.Brad Crowell 10:13  For Pilates. How is it for Pilates?Lesley Logan 10:16  Like, how is it used for Pilates, maybe?Brad Crowell 10:19  (inaudible) I feel like I'm missing a piece. Lesley Logan 10:20  Well, you know. Brad Crowell 10:21  How is it for Pilates? How does it work for Pilates?Lesley Logan 10:24  I mean, they clearly took a lot of time taking. Brad Crowell 10:25  How is it official for Pilates? Lesley Logan 10:26  They took a lot of time on that YouTube name Brad, the details for this. Okay, so here's the deal. I need to be really honest with you guys. I've been on a MOTR. I am not certified in a MOTR. I am not trained to teach a MOTR, and I don't. So I can't rave about it the way that my friends who are trained on the MOTR rave about it. So I'm gonna give a shout out to SuperKate, Erika Quest, I think even teeny_pilates on Instagram there's one more. Oh my gosh, sweet girl who isn't the OC anyways, so there are tons of people who are truly trained in teaching on the MOTR, and that is who I would really pose this question to. I am a classical Pilates teacher, which means I kind of just play on my classical equipment, and I know a lot about that. What I will say about the MOTR that's really cool is you can do a lot of movements that are in Pilates using the MOTR and it doesn't take up a lot of space. You could not use the MOTR on OPC to take a reformer class. You can't do that. Or you can't do that for a Pilates Anytime class, you can't. Brad Crowell 11:27  Well, it's not a reformer. Lesley Logan 11:28  No, but people do reformer moves on it, just like they do mat moves on it, just like they do bar moves on it. So there's a lot of similarities there. But if you buy a MOTR, you need to take MOTR classes. That's what you just have to do. So if you want a MOTR, my discount works for that MOTR. Brad Crowell 11:43  It does. Lesley Logan 11:44  And then you can reach out to me and I'll connect you with one of those few girls that I just mentioned, and they will teach you. Brad Crowell 11:49  I love that. Lesley Logan 11:49  So I'm so sorry. Clearly, I don't know all the answers, but if you have a question, you want me to take a stab at it, or Brad to take a stab at then you want to send in your questions. You apparently can call us, we say the number somewhere in the credits. So listen to that, or just send it to me on Instagram or YouTube. We get them there, and then we'll answer your questions here.Brad Crowell 12:08  Yeah, you can text us at 310-905-5534. Stick around we'll be right back. Brad Crowell 12:13  Okay, let's talk about Shayla Pelton. Shayla is a passionate boudoir photographer based in Arizona, dedicated to helping individuals and couples cultivate self love and elevate their mindsets. Inspired by her own experiences and the transformative power of photography, she believes that everyone, regardless of age, body changes or life circumstances, is beautiful and deserving of celebrating their unique selves. We had the pleasure of meeting Shayla in person at James Patrick's event, the last event that he hosted for that series. I can't remember what it was called. Lesley Logan 12:49  You guys had to listen to that episode, but he is such a fascinating man. We are at the event. It's a last day. Everyone's having the best time, and he's like, we're never doing this again. And I was like, oh god, okay, that's one way to end a run, but we did get to meet her in person. And she is such a she's like a little firefly, but I mean that in the best way, she lights up wherever she's at, and she's really excited. I just really loved we had a great time talking with her. And I was like, I have to, I want to have her on the Be It Pod. And I told her you have to pitch yourself. Because that was what's it about. That was what the event was about. So I couldn't just invite her on, she has to pitch herself, and she wrote me a great pitch. And what I loved about this.Brad Crowell 13:29  Well, she came from a career in retail, and really wanted to work for herself, and has been a photographer, and was always passionate about it. And we got super fired up for her, because we love entrepreneurialism, and we absolutely believe that you can make money working for yourself, and there's no reason that you can't make money being a photographer, as inspired by James, he does the same thing. And so it was really cool to meet her and be able to encourage her. And then also, well, basically, we were there helping people cultivate their pitches and to figure things out. So it was great to challenge her a little bit, and then she pitched us, and we said, this is really awesome. Great job. Lesley Logan 13:32  Well, we haven't had a boudoir photographer on the show. We've we have brought on Dr. Celeste Holbrook, and we've brought on Nikole Mitchell, and we also just had Dr. Jordin Wiggins, who is a pleasure coach as well. And so we've had people on who talk about, oh and Kelli Adame like pleasure and receiving and all these things. But if you don't feel sexy, like we have a big jump, that's a hard thing. And so I really like what Shayla does, because the boudoir photography used to just be like the gift you gave your future husband, like some weird gift to the wedding, but it can really be for you, and that's what we got to talk about.Brad Crowell 14:32  I think that's my biggest takeaway, is that boudoir photography isn't necessarily about sex. Lesley Logan 14:50  No, I think it's actually about confidence and seeing yourself in the most beautiful way that you exist in and no matter your body type or scars you have. I follow her on Instagram, and I see the different women she photographs, and they're fucking all stunning. I'm like, I want to look like that. Like it's just so fun, because the camera catches you at this, she's so good at catching your true light, and you're showing things, and it's just great. And then you get to see yourself through that lens. I was talking to my client, (inaudible), today, and she's like, I don't see myself every day, so I don't think anything has changed. I think you should take a picture. I don't like to take a picture of myself. Okay, well, I'm looking at you and you have changed. So either I'm going to be the person who tells you that you have to believe me, or you take a picture so that, because we see ourselves every single day, we don't realize the changes that are happening. And so I really love it. Lesley Logan 15:42  Anyways, boudoir photography is about reclaiming your sexuality. Everything about us is different. Everything about us is worthy of love. And so even though it's not about sex, we shouldn't be ashamed of the sexuality that we have, because it's part of who we are, and it's part of that charisma and that charm, and also, ladies, it's fucking awesome and okay to have sexuality and sexual desires and enjoy pleasures and that's why I keep bringing these women on and telling you to do that, because the burnouts and breakdowns you're having, they're having, I bet you maybe a little pleasure and a little enjoyment. But if you don't think that you are sexy or you're not confident in that way, I think a boudoir photoshoot could be a really great gift to yourself. And if you hate it, throw it away. You won't. You just won't. You'll just really think they're cool.Brad Crowell 16:27  Yeah. And I think that that was an interesting thing, where she talked about, you know, I think the questions you asked her were really helpful for people who are, like, boudoir curious, where it's like, I'm not ready for that, or what is it going to be like? Or, I don't know, but what other questions in that way. But what was really great is that the preconceptions that people have about boudoir photography is that you have to be sexy, you have to be hot, you have to be all the things. And Shayla talked about how that is not reality. That is actually not at all what it's about. You don't have to show up performing for the camera. It's actually when you get to know her and the two of you have conversations, she's gonna work with you to bring that element out of you. And no matter what you're wearing or not wearing, or how ready you feel, she's gonna help you get to that place. And she said, I love that she intentionally doesn't doctor up the images all over the place, because she's going to capture the beauty inside of the person that she's photographing, and doesn't have to add all this extra stuff to it. And I just thought that was really cool. Lesley Logan 17:40  Yeah, I mean, I'm a big fan, and now I think everyone should go do a boudoir photoshoot. I think I should do one.Brad Crowell 17:47  I'm in. Lesley Logan 17:48  I know you are. Brad Crowell 17:51  Sign me up. Maybe I should do one. Lesley Logan 17:53  Okay. Brad Crowell 17:54  I'd be down. Lesley Logan 17:59  Okay, let's, we'll figure this out. We'll work on it. It'll be a 20 20, what's next year? 2025. We'll put it on the list. Brad Crowell 18:05  Well, she said on embracing your true self, we never see ourselves in that beautiful vulnerability, because we always have our shields up, right? Only people that we are most intimate with ever see us in those moments. And she explained that when we look at ourselves in the mirror, we don't feel that sexy or that fun or that fire, but we all have it. We all have it. We just don't always let ourselves see it.Lesley Logan 18:07  You're so busy thinking about I got these 17 things to do today. I got these many things to do today, and then your partner comes in and they're like, all they're seeing you all sexy, and you're like, oh my God, my brain is in the wrong journey. But that's the thing.Brad Crowell 18:16  And having a photo like this is an incredible way to remind yourself. Lesley Logan 18:45  That you are. Brad Crowell 18:46  That you have it, right, and it's a moment, but I can't remember who we were talking to, who said they write down their wins on a note card, and when they're feeling down, they pull out the note card. Was that all the way back to Amy Ledin? I think it was.Lesley Logan 19:02  My mom's favorite episode, she, and in the two and a half years I've been doing this podcast, guys, my mom only likes episode five. Brad Crowell 19:10  Now that is not true. Not true. Lesley Logan 19:12  She still quotes it. Brad Crowell 19:13  She still quotes it, but she likes more than episode five. But seriously, this is like that where if you're struggling with confidence, you can pull out this photo, and even if it's only for you, you still have this, this moment where you're like, I am a rock star, and I love that. I think that is, I think that's necessary. Lesley Logan 19:33  Yeah, I agree. I agree. Brad Crowell 19:34  Yeah. All right, stick around. We'll be right back. Brad Crowell 19:37  All right. Finally, let's talk about those, Be It Action Items. Say it with me. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Shayla Pelton? Lesley Logan 19:49  I think you know what I want. Brad Crowell 19:50  Tell me. Lesley Logan 19:50  I want our listeners to record themselves saying that and then we can use their recording. Brad Crowell 19:57  That'd be fun. Lesley Logan 19:57  Just like Keith Olbermann has his friends introduce like and now here's Keith. We can have different listeners, yeah, we can have different listeners send in themselves saying, what bold executable, intrinsic or targeted steps?Brad Crowell 20:11  Okay, I love this, and I really love this, y'all. Call our number and leave us a voicemail of you saying, "What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo?" And we will take those clips and we'll start to put them into the show. Lesley Logan 20:29  I think that'd be so fun. And if that's too long, you could also record yourself saying, "Until next time, Be It Till You See It."Brad Crowell 20:36  Yeah, that too. That too. So 310-905-5534. Hit us up. Okay.Lesley Logan 20:42  (inaudible) was like, what's going on? Why are people emailing us this? Brad Crowell 20:47  No, just call it. We won't answer. Just leave a voicemail, and then we'll get the voicemail. Lesley Logan 20:51  It's probably important to know we'll never answer. Brad Crowell 20:53  Well, that number is intentional that we're, I'm not picking that number up, but it's there for people to leave a voicemail. Lesley Logan 20:59  You could answer it. We just don't, because it's for voicemails. Brad Crowell 21:02  Yeah, my phone fucking rings. I don't answer it. Lesley Logan 21:04  (inaudible) way too much. Okay, well, just so we, call a different number if you want us to answer, but leave a message.Brad Crowell 21:09  Okay, so she said, book yourself a boudoir session. That is the Be It Action Item that you can take. You can do this. All you gotta do is the first step, which is book that session, whether that's with her, with Shayla, or with someone else. Do it for you. She has people fly into Phoenix to work with her,by the way.Lesley Logan 21:27  We definitely have amazing recommendations for where to stay in that area, too, so. Brad Crowell 21:31  We do. There's also an incredible botanical gardens that you should see while you're in town. Anyway, she said you should book this for yourself, because you are worthy. You're worthy today. You're worthy right now. Lesley Logan 21:43  You don't have to send us the picture, but you do have to tell us now if you do this. Brad Crowell 21:46  Yeah, yeah. Also, she said, prioritize yourself by taking small moments every single day just for you. And she had personal experience with this where she said, when I started to work my yoga practice in for myself in the morning, I actually became an incredibly better person, and I performed better at work, and it was just better all around and she's talked about getting her nails done and being intentional about taking care of herself. So prioritizing yourself, and this is something that I'm sure you've heard Lesley talk about, self-care isn't selfish care. And when you prioritize yourself, you are going to show up better in every other aspect of your life, every other element of your life, for the people that you are intentionally taking care of or serving or working with, or your clients or your family or friends, whatever it is, when you prioritize yourself, you are going to be a better you.Lesley Logan 22:39  Yep, I love it. I'm in on that. She also said, put time into energy work and releasing generational trauma and healing in your own family. And I think this is really important, because we can try to, like, I just have therapy, but we don't always release the actual energy of that. And so I'm gonna highlight episode 421, with Dr. Louise Swartswalter, who will release like she's not gonna release my great grandfather shit. And you know what? I think I worry less. So that's really great. And I don't remember Lauren Zoeller's most recent episode, but Lauren Zoeller does somatic releasing work, and that is a great way to get rid of some of that trauma through energy work. We had Keri Ford, who's a somatics coach, who did that. Brad Crowell 23:18  Lauren is episode 388. Keri Ford, 175.Lesley Logan 23:24  Yeah, yeah. So anyways, I'm sure we've had other people, but those ones I remember. So do this because.Brad Crowell 23:31  We have Michael Unbroken.Lesley Logan 23:32  Oh. Don't tell him I didn't. Michael's episodes are really, he's working with mostly men now, though. So that (inaudible) that's kind of why there's lots. Brad Crowell 23:41  He's episode 298. Lesley Logan 23:43  No, I think we're good. I think that's plenty. We don't need to overwhelm them with trauma. They just need to do it. So here's the thing, if you don't, it doesn't, you can't shove this in like a closet and then never look at it again. It's gonna rear its ugly head. So do the work. Brad Crowell 23:57  Do the work.Lesley Logan 23:58  Because it makes a huge difference. And especially if you're a parent, it affects who you are for your kids to see, and it really does make big changes, so. You guys, I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell 24:07  And I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 24:08  Thank you so much for being here. Shayla, thank you for being amazing. I can't wait to hear how many people get some boudoir shoots. I really am excited. I think everyone needs a photoshoot. And I think a lot of people don't have pictures of themselves that they like because they don't have a professional take pictures of them. Your friends and family are never gonna take the most amazing picture, like Monica Linda would or Shayla would. You know, you just need a good photographer. I love all the pictures that professionals took of me. I mean, Brad's great too, because he's also a professional but I like theirs too. So go do it. It'll change your life. It'll help you Be It Till You See It. Brad Crowell 24:08  Bye for now. Lesley Logan 24:41  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 25:24  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 25:29  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 25:33  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 25:40  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 25:43  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to today's ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. Dating can be the BEST. But it can also be THE WORST if you've been on the hunt for “the one” for a while. Whether you're newly single or a seasoned app swiper, we're throwing it back to the lesson that changed how we approached partnership and ourselves, from relationship coach Lauren Zoeller. Tune in for the non-negotiables you should establish going into any relationship, and an insightful exercise to help you figure out your needs in a relationship, and how to give them to yourself. Lauren is a CTA certified Love & Relationship Coach, motivational speaker and podcast host. She's the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a coaching program that teaches women how to attract love. She's been featured in international publications like Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Thrive Global, Money Inc., and more. Believe us when we say love is her language!Listen to our full episode with Lauren here.Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.Follow Lauren:laurenzoeller.com@laurenzoeller Sign up for our monthly adulting newsletter:teachmehowtoadult.ca/newsletter Follow us on the ‘gram:@teachmehowtoadultmedia@gillian.bernerFollow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult

On this week's episode of Badass Basic Bitch, we're excited to have Lauren Zoeller, a somatic dating and relationship coach who helps women understand the profound connection between the nervous system and relationships. Lauren shares her journey from traditional talk therapy to discovering somatic therapy, which she describes as the missing piece in her healing puzzle. We explore how understanding your nervous system can transform the way you attract and maintain healthy relationships, and Lauren offers practical advice for navigating love and connection in a more mindful way. She also dives into the impact of trauma on our nervous system and how to create lasting change in both personal and professional life.More About Lauren!Lauren Zoeller is a somatic dating and relationship coach who specializes in helping women find and keep healthy partnerships by understanding their nervous systems. After years of traditional therapy and mindset work, Lauren discovered the transformative power of somatic therapy. Today, she uses her expertise to guide women in building deeper, more authentic connections in their relationships and lives.Connect with Lauren!Instagram: @laurenzoellerTikTok: @coachlaurenzoellerWebsite: laurenzoeller.comConnect with Brianna!Instagram: @mombossinaustinLinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/briannademikeFollow the Podcast on Instagram: @badassbasicbitchLove the podcast? We would love if you would leave a review!Thank you to this week's sponsors!Air Doctor: Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BBB, you'll receive UP TO $300 off air purifiers! 

Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell recap the conversation with Matt Gerlach, an entrepreneur and breakthrough consultant focused on men's mental health and well-being. This recap explores the impact of unhealed trauma on loved ones and the critical role parents play in modeling self-care and teaching children the importance of boundaries. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Why microchipping is essential for pet safety.Expansions to OPC fitness decks and where to purchase.How to embrace imperfection and self-acceptance.Impact of unhealed trauma on family members and future generations.The essential role of parents in teaching boundaries to their children.How to break the cycle of generational trauma and foster healing.How to take control of your life with goal-setting strategies. Episode References/Links:Barrels Deck FlashcardsOPC Summer TourCambodia February 2025 RetreatOPC $40 for 40 DayseLevate Mentorship ProgramPilates Studio Growth Accelerator Program 6-Step Guide to Creating Your Dream Life with Matt GerlachMatt Gerlach's PodcastLauren Zoeller Episode 388  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. DEALS! Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox Be in the know with all the workshops at OPCBe It Till You See It Podcast SurveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates MentorshipFREE Ditching Busy Webinar  Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Follow Us on Social Media:InstagramFacebookLinkedIn  Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  To think that you are less than and then you just have to be better. And once you're better, then things are better. Actually, the more you love and accept yourself, the better all things are.  Lesley Logan 0:11  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.  Lesley Logan 0:53  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the growth-oriented convo I had with Matt Gerlach in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now and go back to listen to that one. And then come back and join us.Brad Crowell 1:11  Yeah.Lesley Logan 1:11  What a sweet guy. I like him a lot.Brad Crowell 1:13  It was a super thoughtful interview. Lesley Logan 1:14  Yeah, he's super vulnerable and authentic. Brad Crowell 1:18  That's how he described himself is he said he wasn't always vulnerable. And I mean, it definitely if that's something he intentionally worked on, it comes through in that interview. It was great. Lesley Logan 1:30  Some coaches in that space could be like a look at me. Look what I've done, you know, like just do it my way. And he's definitely like, I'm on this journey and here's what's helped me. And it's more of a guide. And I really appreciate that about him. So today is August 15th, 2024 and it's Check the Chip Day. Brad Crowell 1:47  That's right. Lesley Logan 1:48  About this day, Check the Chip Day is celebrated annually on August 15th. It's that time of the year when we raise awareness regarding the importance of microchipping. Brad Crowell 1:56  Microchipping. Lesley Logan 1:57  Which greatly helps in reuniting missing pets with their owners. In fact, every second a pet family pet is lost with only one in 10 ever being found. Every second a family pet is lost and only one in 10 are ever found. There's a fucking lot of seconds in a day. So on one tenth. Oh my god. This is very depressing.Brad Crowell 2:17  That's why we're raising awareness. Check the Chip Day.Lesley Logan 2:20  Approximately 10 million pets are lost annually.Brad Crowell 2:23  Ten million.Lesley Logan 2:24  Microchipping provides peace of mind to pet owners as it confirms the safety of their beloved pets. Gone are the days when pets were kept in cages now, they can be free and out of harm's way. Okay.Brad Crowell 2:34  Yeah. Okay. So FYI, they, I, I tried to figure out the best way to check your chip. Okay. Cause if it's Check Your Chip Day, how do we do it? Ultimately you need to have a special RFID reader and your cell phone can't do the job. So there are a couple of apps that connect to a reader, but you got to buy the damn reader first. So I really went down the rabbit hole on here. Basically, take your, take your dog to the vet, get the chip read, right? Get that number. And then here's the, here's the problem. You might have a chip, but the chip still has to be registered with a system.Lesley Logan 3:11  And also a lot of people don't update their contact information. Brad Crowell 3:16  They almost never do. Lesley Logan 3:16  So they move things like that. I follow one of the rescue, dog rescues out here and after the 4th of July, they got in 400 pets in a day, 400 pets turned in, most of them had chips. And so, first of all, if you do find a pet, go to a vet, just drive to a vet and have it checked, do not go to a pound and things like that, because some of those are kill shelters, and if they, even if they have a microchip, they have a limited space, so take them to a vet, and then that way they can scan the thing, and then they can hopefully contact someone, but everybody, you need to update. Brad, are ours updated?Brad Crowell 3:55  Yeah. Lesley Logan 3:57  Okay.Brad Crowell 3:57  Yeah, there's a couple of different databases. You can just search for pet, you know, pet chip databases or microchip databases. Cause it depends on the chip. Sometimes the chip depends on the database. Like for example, we have two of our dogs are in one database and then one is in a different database. But they need to be in a database.Lesley Logan 4:15  Oh, cause we had two dogs in California and one in Nevada. Brad Crowell 4:17  That's right. Lesley Logan 4:18  So also another way you can do this, you guys, we have them chipped and we have them, what do we call these things?Brad Crowell 4:24  Air tagged. Lesley Logan 4:24  Air tagged. Brad Crowell 4:25  Yeah. We also put air tags on ours.Lesley Logan 4:26  And we have air tags and they have these cute little things that go on their collars and the air tags are great because whenever we get out of the van on tour, it goes, you've left three items behind. So it's always August. It's like, you've left. It's like, he's right here. Like, don't panic me about the one that runs off.Lesley Logan 4:34  You've left your item, Gaia, behind.Lesley Logan 4:46  Yeah. So anyways, do both, double dose it.Brad Crowell 4:50  Yeah. Double dose it. So next time you go to the vet or even just go to that now.Lesley Logan 4:56  I would not wait. If you have no idea, if you're sitting here listening to us going, I wonder if mine is like, don't, you'll be so pissed if in three days, your dog gets out and then you're like, they told me, it's like, yeah, we did.Brad Crowell 5:09  Handle it. All right. Here's what's coming up in events and travel. A summer tour. We are on the road right now. As we speak we are probably leaving St. Louis and driving to Kansas city. By the time you're listening to this we have. Today's the 15th, tomorrow the 16th. We're in Kansas city on the 18th. We're in Colorado Springs, Colorado. If you are in either of those places and you want to come hang out go to opc.me/tour, opc.me/tour. That's it for the summer tour at this point, and then we're going to be doing a winter tour leaving in December but we're still working on all the specifics for that. So right now, the last two stops are going to be Kansas City and Colorado Springs. After that, we are still taking applications for elevate. That's Lesley's mentorship program. It's a Pilates mentorship program. It is nine months long. It is an amazing opportunity where Lesley gets to pass on all the information she learned from her teacher, Jay Grimes, who literally studied with Joseph Pilate. He taught all the stuff he knows. Lesley Logan 6:10  Pilate? Just Joseph Pilate? Brad Crowell 6:11  Just Joseph Pilate. Just Joseph, one Pilate. Lesley Logan 6:14  He's one Pilate. Brad Crowell 6:15  Yeah, he only has one. Joseph Pilates and he, Jay, passed on all the information that he knows to Lesley. She's literally been working with him for 12 years. Something like that. 10 years, at least 10, more than 10. Lesley Logan 6:27  Yeah, yeah. Brad Crowell 6:28  Yeah. 12 years. You're super young, babe. I love you so much. And she gets to pass on all this information. Go to lesleylogan.co/elevate. You'll be able to say that you're classically trained. You're going to be a third generation teacher. You're going to be able to connect all the dots for all the different pieces of equipment. It's going to help you with class planning. You're not going to talk as much when you teach. It's going to be great.Lesley Logan 6:46  I think the official would be 10 years, guys. Brad Crowell 6:48  Ten. Lesley Logan 6:49  Official. Yeah. Yeah.Brad Crowell 6:50  She's still doing the math all right. It's all right. Lesley Logan 6:52  I just want to, I don't want to lie, you know.Brad Crowell 6:54  We don't want you to lie. Okay. So, then, we are going to Cambodia in February 2025 crowsnestretreats.com crowsnestretreats.com. Y'all know it's my favorite thing to do of all the things that we do. It is an amazing experience. It is incredible trip. We're going to go romp through the jungle. We're going to eat great food, local food. We're going to do some Pilates. We're going to meet up amazing people. It's a journey and it's an incredible journey and we want you to join it with us. Come stay at our house, crowsnestretreats.com. All right. You want to take the next two?Lesley Logan 7:26  Yeah, because I want you to be an OPC member. You guys, it is one of the best places to do your Pilates because guess what? You can do Pilate, you can do your Pilates anywhere you can lay down and OPC is, I know you're like, I won't do it online. I have to go to a place. You can still go to a place and you can be an OPC member because here's the deal. You need to do more Pilates than you think. Once a week isn't going to cut it. Our classes are 30 minutes long, but finishing is optional. And we have monthly classes that are 50 minutes long. We hold you accountable because classes do disappear, but as of last month, you actually have the weekly classes access for two weeks for each class. So each week we drop a new class. But you have access to this week's class and last week's class. Don't you like how creative those names are? This week's class and last week's class. Yeah. And one of our teachers today was like, if you're like, Oh my god, I'm overwhelmed. Which one do I do? She closed her eyes and she hits click. So there you go. Thanks, Christine, for that. So opc.me/40 gets you 40 days of OPC for $40. You can quit if you don't like it, but hey, you might love it.Brad Crowell 8:28  You might just love it. Lesley Logan 8:29  And by the way, it can be part of that 2 percent of every day you dedicate to you. And then if you are a Pilates instructor and you are feeling like your business is just not making the money that you want, then I want you to join Brad for our free webinar. It 's called Accelerator and it's really amazing because by the way, there is money in Pilates and you can make it and you are capable of doing it. And no, you don't have to do crazy memberships or do wild things on social media. Brad Crowell 8:56  Grow a million followers. Lesley Logan 8:58  There's a path for every single person to make the money they want to make, especially when you have, when you're armed with the knowledge on how to do it. So go to prfit.biz/accelerator prfit.biz/accelerator.Brad Crowell 9:09  That's profit without the O prfit.biz/accelerator.Lesley Logan 9:14  All right. We're going to get into this episode with Matt, but before we do, we have an audience question.Brad Crowell 9:18  We sure do. Esta Zero on YouTube says, Hey you've been talking about these flashcards. Where do I find them?Lesley Logan 9:27  Yeah, I was like, oh, this is an easy question. You guys, you just go to onlinepilatesclasses.com and if you go to the shop, it'll say flashcards. Brad Crowell 9:36  Yeah, or you go to opc.me/flashcards. That'll also do it. So directly to the spot.Lesley Logan 9:40  And right now, this episode is coming out. You'll have access to four decks of the five we've worked on so far. The fifth one is the Barrels deck and that one is, I think you can buy it, you just have to wait. That one will be out probablyBrad Crowell 9:56  Barrels will be shipping in Lesley Logan 9:57  September, October? Brad Crowell 9:57  Eight to ten weeks from, yeah, next week.Lesley Logan 10:01  Yeah. So, yeah. So we're probably looking at like Brad Crowell 10:03  we're probably looking at like timber. We're looking like Lesley Logan 10:05  October. Brad Crowell 10:05  Yeah, beginning of October.Lesley Logan 10:07  But also here's fun news. The mat deck got a makeover. Brad Crowell 10:12  It sure did. Got a facelift. Lesley Logan 10:14  Yeah. Facelift. It got fillers. We got more exercises in there. Brad Crowell 10:21  That's great. Lesley Logan 10:22  It's actually youthful. Cause it got, it went from its vintage vibe to other rebrand that is so  Brad Crowell 10:28  It's hip, young and cool now. Lesley Logan 10:29  Hip, young and cool. And it has standing exercises in there. We have more prep exercises in there. It's just really, really fun. So if you haven't got the mat deck yet, you should get this new one, which is probably shipping like as we speak, because it was eight weeks ago, four weeks ago, so it's probably in three to four weeks still, but. Yeah. It's happening.Brad Crowell 10:51  Yeah. We're talking end of August.Lesley Logan 10:53  It's a little beefier, but still that same great feel that will fit in your gym bag. We'll go on a trip with you. All the good things. So you can get those. Also. Oh my god. I left the cat out of the bag right now. We are reprinting the Reformer Deck and I added the related mat exercises to the Reformer Deck. Brad Crowell 11:11  What? Lesley Logan 11:12  I know.Brad Crowell 11:13  So we've also given a facelift to the Reformer card.Lesley Logan 11:16  It's a tiny one. Micro lift, a mini lift. It was a mini lift. Brad Crowell 11:20  It's a lash extension. Lesley Logan 11:21  Yeah. That's really what it is. You're correct. You are so correct. And then because because my team, it just wants to finish this, the flashcard project. I'm already working on deck number six.Brad Crowell 11:35  It's only been five years. Only.Lesley Logan 11:37  Four. Four. We came up with the idea in 2019, but I didn't write the mat deck until February of 2020 and then the pandemic happened. But in the later part of the pandemic of 2020, we released the Mat Deck. So currently it has been four official years.Brad Crowell 11:52  Okay. That's fair. That's fair. Four years. Five decks.Lesley Logan 11:54  But the sixth deck will be the fifth year. And then, oh my god, Meredith's like, maybe you do an expansion deck. And I was like, shh. You shut your mouth, you zip it.Brad Crowell 12:02  You just wait up. Hold up.Lesley Logan 12:03  You zip it. Cause I have some ideas of what I want to do with these cards. Like when you, I, I want it, I want, I wouldn't do like a text message that like sends you cards that like, it's almost like a tarot reading, but like the cards are laid out to like create an exercise. Brad Crowell 12:19  That could be fun. Lesley Logan 12:19  Isn't it fun like today's that you're reading today is this? We make it all like Shamany. Brad Crowell 12:26  All right. We'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. Lesley Logan 12:28  Anyway, stop.Brad Crowell 12:29  If you, if y'all have any ideas on how you would want us to work with you on these cards.Lesley Logan 12:34  No, we're not making a digital deck. Brad Crowell 12:37  No, we're not doing a digital deck. Lesley Logan 12:38  So you can ask and it's.Brad Crowell 12:39  Although I, I have been tempted to do a, a full app that, that, that's interesting. That could be interesting.Lesley Logan 12:47  No, we have an app and they can watch the videos in there. No. Lesley Logan 12:50  They can't watch the videos. Lesley Logan 12:51  No. No, no, the cards are the way they are, but I may help people put building blocks together is the thing that I would be interested in doing. And since I'm the one doing it, this is what I want to do. So let me know if you like that idea and if your idea sucks. Keep it to yourself.Brad Crowell 13:10  Stick around, we'll be right back. Okay, now let's talk about Mr. Matt Gerlach. Matt is an entrepreneur, an author, and an owner of a breakthrough consulting business netting over a million dollars in annual revenue. He focuses on men's mental health and well being. Matt draws from his own experiences to guide clients through their struggles. His work emphasizes the importance of self-worth, setting boundaries, goal setting, and breaking the cycles of trauma. And generationally, too. You know, I thought it was really cool that he said, I'm the first one in my family to break this cycle, right? Super aware of that. And that's pretty cool. I think that's awesome. Lesley Logan 13:53  I know. It's really, it's really amazing. When he first, when we first met him and he spoke, I was like, wow, beautiful. He like, like his soul is beautiful. You know, like, it's just really, really amazing. So he said, there's never a destination when we're perfect. Like, like, there's just not like, like perfect doesn't get, you don't get to stop, you know? And so what he said is his biggest thing is that he, that he's ever done is he. Brad Crowell 14:17  I think he said, I think he said this. Lesley Logan 14:20  Yeah. Yeah. And if you're not watching YouTube, then you don't know what just happened. So that was not for the folks at home, babe. But we have a hat is really what it all is. That was a little of a merch, you know, thing. It's, 'Perfect is boring,' it's what the hat said. So he said the biggest thing he's done is to learn to love and accept himself in learning and loving this, to accept himself was to recognize that there's nothing wrong with him. And I really love that. You guys, there's nothing wrong with you. Like, you are enough. We have, oh, another merch.  Brad Crowell 14:52  Another merch.  Lesley Logan 14:53  We are, but who knew? I didn't know this today, but we have a sweatshirt that says, you are enough. You've done enough today. When you look at it in the mirror and then on the back, it tells the person behind you, you've done enough today. But at any rate there's nothing wrong. And I think that's really a hard thing because yes, of course self-growth and self-development is an amazing thing. There's always something you can learn about yourself. But to think that you are less than, and then you just have to be better, and once you're better, then things are better. Actually, the more you love and accept yourself, the better all things are. You know? You bring a whole different vibe to every group you're in, a whole different, you have less insecurity in conversations and so deeper conversations can happen. It's just really amazing. And so he also did talk about boundaries, you know, I'm a big fan of boundaries. And he said that it was because he really focused on boundaries and advocating for himself. He was able to take his business into a million dollar paycheck for himself. And that's also cool because most people think I gotta say yes to everyone. I gotta people-please. I gotta work all the time. No, I can't have boundaries because then people won't like me and then I won't make any money. And that's not true because he fucking made it work. Million dollar a year paycheck. I, yeah, I love that. Brad Crowell 16:01  Yeah. I mean, that's, actually, his story was that when he first started his business, he didn't have any boundaries. And his clients were like, flying him all over the place and he was doing all this stuff and he was getting really, he was building a lot of resentment when asked to handle things that he probably, my guess is, had advised against, they did it anyway, and he's like, what the fuck, now I have to clean up your mess and it was building a lot of resentment, and that's because he didn't have boundaries at the time. And then over time started to shift all that and change it. So, I mean, what an awesome thing to be able to help guide people through setting those boundaries you know, for his clients with his clients, really cool. One thing I loved, he said is that his mission, his, he talked about his mission, helping unhealed trauma. And he mentioned that trauma, when left unhealed, you think it's not affecting anyone or you think it's not affecting you, but it is, it's actually being passed to your loved ones. It's being passed to the people in your immediate circle. Whether you realize it or not, we are, we are passing it along and whether we're intentionally doing it or not, we are passing it along. So that was actually kind of shocking to me. I was like, never thought about that. He highlighted the time we're in right now where the word generational trauma is becoming a lot more prevalent. We're, we're becoming a lot more aware of it. And that's why I found this impactful is because my parents don't seem like they're traumatized people, but I definitely learned things from them that I had to choose to part ways with later on in my life. And it's taken me a long time to understand how I was thinking, why I was thinking it that way, and then make the decision to no longer think that way. Not to tell too long of a story here, but generally a lot to do with money and the way that I think about money. Was definitely, I adopted it from my, my parents. The irony is I never actually learned how to handle money. What I got from them was the emotional element of money. And it was negative. There's never enough money, right? Save every penny you got because you're never going to have enough money. And so I never learned. I learned how to save, you know, but I didn't actually do it. But I learned about that. But I didn't learn how money growth worked. And so it created this weird fear around it. And I don't think my parents meant to do that. That wasn't something that they, but it was, it was clearly something that, you know, they adopted, too.Lesley Logan 18:34  And also just speaking of what parents could do. So many parents don't make time for themselves because they're like, oh, I want to do things with my kids. Do you know the best thing you could teach your child is that you, boundaries. Like I, in the morning, I spend time with myself. You get to spend time with yourself and we all are allowed and all deserve time to go inward and think about ourselves. You want to, you want to pass something on, pass on boundaries.Brad Crowell 19:01  Yeah. I mean, imagine, I mean, this is one of the things that we encourage all of our OPC you know, clients to do is say, hey family, I love you so much. Right now is my time to practice Pilates. I'm only asking for 2 percent of my day and I'm going to do that right now. And when this is happening, I'm doing that.Lesley Logan 19:21  And also, do you want to know what else you can do? They can join you. They just can't talk to you. Brad Crowell 19:25  Right. Lesley Logan 19:25  So, Emily, our neighbor who we did our pop up at her store, I sent her a workout the standing workout from my YouTube channel and she posted, her friend and her doing the same workout. They've never done it before. Brad Crowell 19:39  Cool. Lesley Logan 19:39  They're following along with me. And guess what? One of their daughters just came right up and just started doing right behind them. Brad Crowell 19:44  That's so cool. Lesley Logan 19:45  Didn't interrupt them. Didn't say, hey, can I have this? Like just started doing it because. Brad Crowell 19:49  I love that. Lesley Logan 19:50  They are an example of like taking care of their selves and like, that's important. And so kids just catch on to these good things and they'll catch on to the shit too.Brad Crowell 19:59  Yeah. I love that. When you don't address trauma you are passing it on. And he's, he said he emphasizes the importance of negotiating goals and making achievable plans, focus on goal-setting with his clients, also articulates their goals and overcome limiting belief. And he said, it's really being able to take control over your life and realize that you have agency in building the life that you want and making changes. You know, we totally agree. That's exactly why we created our coaching program, our fitness business coaching program, which is called Agency. It is on purpose. You know, so couldn't agree more. Love that. And there's so many bunch of different ways you can process trauma.Lesley Logan 20:39  You can also reach out to Matt and see what options he's offering and also Brad Crowell 20:43  Actually he is offering a 30-minute call to work with him. Lesley Logan 20:47  Yeah. Brad Crowell 20:48  So, and, and here's, here's the thing, you know, it was working mostly with men, but I'm sure he'll take your call too.Lesley Logan 20:54  Yeah, I'm sure he will. And also like, if you're listening to this and you have a man in your life, send them this episode because you don't have to be the one to tell them what to do. They can figure it out for themselves.Brad Crowell 21:03  That's true. But, we'll tell him, hey, your wife gave you this episode on purpose so that you can book a call with Matt.Lesley Logan 21:10  We could just tell, we just do that. Well then thank your wife. Brad Crowell 21:13  Thank you, wife. Lesley Logan 21:15  Happy life. Happy wife. There you go. Brad Crowell 21:17  Stick around. All right, so finally, let's talk about those Be It Action Items. What bold, executable, intrinsic, or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Matt Gerlach? He said, just to keep going, you need to stay on the journey and celebrate the small wins along the way. Perfectionism is a very real thing. We've talked about perfectionism so much on this pod. I loved in his three steps that he was talking about. Perfectionism was like number one and he said, you got to let it go. And he said, it's probably the hardest thing. So this is like, even though it's step one, it's still challenging to do. And ironically, I found it, I found it really funny that you said, I call myself a recovering perfectionist because I think the idea of. Getting rid of perfectionism is the perfectionist in me . So I'll call myself the recovering perfectionist. I agree. You know, like I'm also, I'm healed. I'm no longer perfect. Alright. Which is the perfect form of, like it's.Lesley Logan 22:18  That's just perfectionism. Yeah. I'm, by the way guys, I'm reading this book on perfectionism and it's irritating the fuck outta me . And I had written to the woman saying, I want her on the pod on. And I, if she comes on the pod. I, I have several questions for her because like, she's basically saying to own your perfectionism, but to let go of the malignant parts and like, keep the like healthy parts. And I'm like, but isn't that like being a human with like, like, isn't that just using your strengths? Like there are strengths that you're, I'm just like, I'm struggling with it. Anyways, I'm a couple of girlfriends are reading it. We're all texting about it. And I just, I'm like. No, I, I don't. She's like, I don't have to call yourself a recovering perfectionist. And I'm like, yeah, I do. And it's not like, I'm like, I'm not using it as like, oh, don't mind me. I'm recovering perfectionist. I'm not using that. No, it's just like, it's a reminder. oh, let that shit go. What basically, Matt's Be It Action Item, we got to let it go. Like that's, I'll let it go.Brad Crowell 23:13  And, and being vulnerable, you know, he said he said, listen, you know, something he's been working on for a long time. And he still feels like he's only penetrated 10% of this perfectionism wall that he has built around himself. So, you know, don't beat yourself up. But it's something, the more you focus on it the more aware of it you'll be and the easier it will be to go I'm doing it again, doing it again. So yeah, what about you?Lesley Logan 23:40  He said, you need to talk to someone about what's going on. And it's really true. Like things grow in the dark, like in the darkness, but when you shed light on it, like it can kill all that bad stuff. And shedding light on it is talking to someone and very, most importantly, he said, select wisely. And so here's the deal, like, absolutely, you can reach out to Matt because if he's not a person for you, I'm sure he has resources for you. So that's what I would do if we've had other guests on in a similar vein, like, reach out to them. These are people who have resources and they have ideas. We are, we are not people who do like, therapy or somatic work we just know people who do and so, but he, you have to select wisely because I think people go, oh, I tried therapy and it didn't work for me. There are so many different types of therapy. And there are soBrad Crowell 24:29  You just had a deep dive with Lauren Zoeller about somatics versus talk versus, you know. Yes.Lesley Logan 24:36  Yes. And there's like, people are doing EMDR. They're doing all this different stuff. So trust your, don't trust your gut if you're like, I don't know, this person's listening to me. I was my person. Go the next person. And I know that's hard. I know, especially when you are finally aware that you are trying to deal with your trauma and it's affecting your life negatively. We want it to like fix it tomorrow. And all of these people might have wait lists or like time, but just know that the fact that you've acknowledged you have this help and that you are on the journey to find someone. Do not let the first one or two people who don't feel like they're a great match, stop you from doing this. Keep searching, keep looking, it's, it's, it, you are worth it. And so use this free call. We have the link. Brad Crowell 25:19  Yeah, it'll be in the show notes. Lesley Logan 25:21  Yeah. So check it out. Go check out Matt Gerlach. Share this with a friend, share this with a dude in your life who we've had Michael Unbroken on and like other people, we've a lot of men in our lives who like, I think are really cool people like Matt, they've done work and they're on this journey and they're always uncovering themselves. They're always learning and growing. And so it can seem like that's what everyone is doing, but also like they did, they've been doing it for years and it took just the acknowledgement and the first step. So it is possible for the people in your life to take that first step. Sometimes as soon as ready, the teacher appears and maybe this episode or other episodes will help ready them. You know, they might hear something in his story that gets them to go, oh, hey, wait, that's me. That's not normal? You know, like that, you know, like you said, neither one of our parents were actually very like textbook traumatizing to us.Brad Crowell 26:13  I'm the problem. It's me.Lesley Logan 26:14  Yeah. But like, you know what I mean? Like when we think about like people like, oh, I like lost my parents and like, this person killed this person in front of me.Brad Crowell 26:23  It's not like my parents were abusive or anything like that. But still. Yeah. And, and actually he mentioned there's like, there's a, there's a big difference between big T trauma and little T trauma, right? Like if you went to war or there's some tragic incident that happened in your, in your life and your childhood or whatever versus like, you know, he, his example was, you know, maybe your uncle yelled at you for doing something stupid when you were a kid and you know, and that stuck with you. You know, and it's been affecting you all this time, subconsciously, that's like little t trauma kind of stuff. Lesley Logan 26:54  So, yeah. Yeah. So come on, take them up on that. You guys share this with a friend and until next time, Be It Till You See It.Brad Crowell 27:02  Bye for now. Lesley Logan 27:04  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 27:47  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 27:52  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co. Brad Crowell 27:56  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan 28:03  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals. Brad Crowell 28:07  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Brad Crowell and Lesley Logan recap their interview with Greg Tomchick. They discuss Greg's emphasis on fostering internal trust and leadership within organizations, the importance of getting to know people you hire, and how chaos in personal lives can affect company culture. They also highlight Greg's focus on a people-first approach in cybersecurity, the value of setting personal standards, and effective strategies for building trust in the workplace.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Reducing pain and strengthening your knees during Reformer moves. Why your employees' personal lives can impact company culture.How trust gaps can be a company's biggest vulnerability and blind spot.The advantage of a people-focused approach to cybersecurity.3 C's framework for building trust within teams and organizations.The importance of setting standards to attract meaningful connections.Episode References/Links:World Listening ProjectOPC Summer ToureLevate Mentorship ProgramCambodia February 2025 RetreatTry OPC $40 for 40 DaysGreg Tomchick WebsiteGreg Tomchick Social LinksValor CybersecurityPilates for Knee Pain Workshop with Sonia AhmedJill Coleman Episode  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. DEALS! Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox Be in the know with all the workshops at OPCBe It Till You See It Podcast SurveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates MentorshipFREE Ditching Busy Webinar  Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Follow Us on Social Media:InstagramFacebookLinkedIn  Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  He was just saying that like security isn't just about technology. It really is about trust within the company culture. And we have to focus on that. So, if you are a business owner, you do have to focus on your company culture, if you do want to have amazing security in your business, because you need everybody to be running at their best and most amazing level. And that goes for in your family too. It doesn't have to be cybersecurity. It could be like just taking care of each other inside of a family as well. Lesley Logan 0:25  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the trust-centric convo I had with Greg Tomchick in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that one, you should go back and listen to that one at some point because it's really freakin good. I totally was thinking how am I going to explain what security is to my listeners and.Brad Crowell 1:27  Cybersecurity.Lesley Logan 1:28  Cybersecurity. I was like, oh, I guess we can talk about being cybersecure helps you be it till you see it. And we didn't even talk about much about cybersecurity, I still don't really know what it is. So it's actually a great interview because you're gonna hear a lot about how to be an awesome human. But first, today is July 18th 2024. And it's World Listening Day. About this day. It's the sound of World Listening Day on July 18th. World Listening Day is hosted every year by the World Listening Project, how many times do we say world listening in a paragraph, a nonprofit organization that is “devoted to understanding the world and its natural environment, societies, and cultures through the practice of listening and field recording.” They explore acoustic ecology, a discipline that studies the relationship between humans and the natural world as mediated through sound. So quiet down, open up your ears, and get ready to study soundscapes on World Listening Day. So what you can do, (inaudible), and you can go hiking without air pods and you could just listen to the sound. Just listen outside and go for a walk around your block without air pods. You could actually just sit in your house without turning any devices on. There's lots of ways to listen to the acoustic ecology. And, you know, what it's mediating through sound to you wherever you are. It's important, you know, so okay, go listen to the world today. Brad Crowell 2:45  Yeah, actually, they may even have some things for you to listen to over at worldlisteningproject.org Lesley Logan 2:51  Cool. Okay, so, coming up, we are super close to leaving for our summer tour. And at the time of recording, five cities workouts are sold out. That's the time we're recording this at the time that this comes in your ears, it's possible that more are sold out. Brad Crowell 3:04  Yeah, a lot more. Lesley Logan 3:06  So you want to go to opc.me/tour to grab your tickets. Yes, you can go to multiple cities. I mean, if you're going to Milwaukee, you may as well come to Chicago or Minneapolis, or Cleveland or something like that. It's gonna be a lot of fun, there's people who are just like totally grouping out, we have merch for the groupies as well. So check it out opc.me/tour. At the time that this drops, we have already accepted people to eLevate and it's possible there are some spots in 2025 left for you to apply to. So if you're a Pilates instructor who is wanting to have a mentorship program that really helps you have more confidence in your teaching, your practice, or connection to the method then go to lesleylogan.co/elevate. We only take 12 people in a group. So don't wait because the next one would be 2026 which is really friggin far away. Brad Crowell 3:49  It's true. Lesley Logan 3:51  Cambodia retreat, our October one is very sold out. But our February one has spots in it. And that one is gonna be amazing because it's a different time of season. So it's actually basically the end of the dry season. And the landscape looks so different. I think that's really cool to see because it helps you understand like, what was going on with these temples and why (inaudible) and like the Mekong River and all this amazing stuff. Plus the sunrises are stunning in February. Would you agree? Brad Crowell 4:16  Oh, I mean, y'all heard me talk about Cambodia before it's my favorite place. Yeah, absolutely. It's a little bit of a different vibe, but it's a great vibe. I mean, we used to actually always do a retreat at the beginning of the year. And then COVID really complicated everything. So yeah, you should absolutely come join us in February 2025. For more information on that go to crowsnestretreats.com, crowsnestretreats.com.Lesley Logan 4:45  And lastly, but not leastly, if you are looking for a workout that works for you finally, that's what OPC is all about. So it is got accountability and community and feedback on your form. And you don't even have to have fancy equipment. There's a mat version, mat only membership version with really amazing classes and lots of support, and you can go to opc.me/40, opc.me/40 it gives you 40 days for $40, which is $1 a day, which is cheaper than a lemon every day, just saying.Brad Crowell 5:15  Before we get started, though, we have an audience question. This is from Alison Trotsky, she DM-ed you here, she said, "Hi, I was wondering if you have any pointers for some Reformer moves to improve knee strength, I use your Reformer flashcards all the time."Lesley Logan 5:32  I love this. So knee strength is really key, it means the muscles above and below the knee have to be strong, which means when you go up the leg, your hips have to be strong and not just flexible, but strong as well. So you want some mobility there, because if the hips are tight, the knees are going to actually be compromised. And so what I would say is if you're on the Reformer, well, first of all, we have a whole workshop on OPC, about reducing knee pain and strengthening your knees. Sonia Ahmed is a physio and Pilates instructor and eLevate grad out of the U.K. and she created that, so you can get that workshop at onlinePilatesclasses.com and you get to keep it forever. And she gave us some amazing exercises that you could do on the mat and also using equipment as well. But on the ReformerBrad Crowell 6:20  Yeah, that one's called Pilates for knee pain. It's a workshop on the site. Lesley Logan 6:24  On the Reformer, I think if you are already doing footwork, you need to know that that is part of what the "strengthen your knees" should be, however, if you're pushing from your knees, you're missing on all the good stuff. And so if you watch my footwork tutorials, I talk about how the knees are not pushing down, it's actually not about opening the knees, it's about working on the back of the legs. And so that would be a good one for you. Stomach massage is gonna be really good. And then also hamstring curls are gonna be really great. Knee stretches are going to be amazing for you. Front splits, like, honestly, it's really hard to choose, there's so many more we can go through. But I would need to know if you're hyperextending your knees. Brad Crowell 6:59  You would need to know?Lesley Logan 7:01  I would, pun intended, apparently. So, Alison, if you are an OPC member, then you can actually send me a video of you doing some of your former moves. And I could see what's going on that makes you think you need to strengthen your knee. And I could give you more and more tailored feedback other than like right now these are just some really good exercises. However, if you are hyperextending your knees, none of these will work. So. Brad Crowell 7:23  Yeah, and we have people submit videos to us every single week, we have something called Form Feedback Fridays, and all of our OPC members are allowed to send in videos. (inaudible) of them doing their practice saying hey, you know, I'm confused on this thing. I'm not sure how you know, whatever. And you can ask whatever question you want to ask. And then our team, the teachers, will actually check it out and give you some feedback. Lesley Logan 7:46  Yeah. Brad Crowell 7:47  Okay, now let's talk about Greg Tomchick. Transitioning from the field to the boardroom. Greg Tomchick, an award-winning cybersecurity coach, former professional baseball player and CEO of Valor Cybersecurity has made a name for himself in the business and technology sectors. He focuses on helping executives cultivate internal trust and improve their leadership capabilities. Greg's approach is rooted in self-discovery and the intentional building of meaningful connections, which he discusses on his podcast, The Connected Mindset Live. As a sought-after speaker, he inspires others to share his journey and insights on building trust from the inside out. Greg isLesley Logan 8:27  He's so cool. Brad Crowell 8:29  Incredibly eloquent and I was surprised to hear him describe himself as the dumb jock in high school. Lesley Logan 8:36  Yeah, there's he doesn't seem at all them. Brad Crowell 8:38  No, in no way. (inaudible)Lesley Logan 8:39  And also very insightful, and curious. And he's also like, in the episode was like, oh, I asked my coaches for feedback. I see people for feedback. He's always looking for feedback, which is like, amazing. I just think he's really awesome. So one of the other, so many things that I loved, we talked about, but he mentioned a rhythm of existence. And he was talking about how our overall lifestyle of how we maintain ourselves as individuals, that we carry our personal life into our company, and that's of company that you work for, or that you run, but we carry it over. And it's so true. I don't, there's no way to compartmentalize like, I do not understand that at all. Brad Crowell 9:19  Well, he was talking about hiring people, I think, or doing interviews and how we hire people based on a resume instead of hiring them based on who they are. And he was talking about how his favorite thing to ask is not like, what do you do for work, but instead it's like, you know, what do you do when you're trying to blow off steam or what do you do? Like, who are you? What do you like to do and what he's hoping to understand is are they, are they like a chaos agent? Is their life chaotic? Lesley Logan 9:47  Because if their life is chaotic, they bring chaos into a company. Brad Crowell 9:50  Yeah. Even, no matter what the resume is, that's how they are, that's who they are, then that's what they're gonna bring. Lesley Logan 9:55  100% This goes for everything, guys, you don't have to be hiring people. We can actually just take this to like friendships, Do you have those friends who just like every thing seems to like tragically happen to them. Like there's just always like, drama in their lives, well, they bring drama into your life, like, that's just how it is, that's who they are. It's okay, if you've been friends with them for 17 years, or like, they know certain people that are super cool. The resume isn't what you're getting, you're getting the actual person. And so in any relationship that you are hiring for, because we are all looking for best friends, partners, people to work with, things like people to hire, get to know them, because that person is what you get. So I think that's a great way of exploring it. And he had said, I just wanna highlight like, because we're like cybersecurity where this come from the episode, he was just saying that, like, security isn't just about technology, it really is about trust within the company culture. And like, we have to focus on that. So if you are a business owner, you do have to focus on your company culture, if you do want to have amazing security in your business, because you need everybody to be running at their best and most amazing level. And that goes for in your family, too. Like it doesn't have to be cybersecurity. It could be like just taking care of each other inside of a family as well.Brad Crowell 11:08  Yeah, listening to Greg talk about that, it reminded me of the time that I worked back in the office. And you could always tell when somebody was down or you know, whatever. And 99% of the time, it was something happening outside of the office. Yeah. Because if it was in the office, and somebody fucked up or whatever, y'all knew it, it wasn't like, you know, he.Lesley Logan 11:32  You could also address it, it wasn't like you would oh, there's Greg, he fucked up the project. You would like talk to Greg, hey, Greg, what happened here? Like, how can we fix this? Like, you kind of actually can resolve a conflict, almost, I would think that with, you can't go to their partner and go, What the hell's happening at home, you're fucking, you're making him have a bad day at work. It's bringing us all down. Like you can't do that. So like, it's a little, you know, hard.Brad Crowell 11:55  Yeah. Well, one of the things I really love that he said was, again, talking about companies and again, making me reflect on my experience, I said, large companies that he has worked with, they want a more people-focused approach to security not just the focus on technology, which I thought was really interesting, because for me, what that means is, technology's changing the cybersecurity space, too. And it's impacting some of the things that before a company like his might come in and be like, here's a recommendation, you got to do this, this, this, this, and this, and he's like today, with the, you know, the advent of login, like one, one, password login, you know, or whatever, all those kinds of tools, they those kinds of tools, make his job as a cybersecurity expert, easier. And he said, actually, a lot of the time now, he's working with them on hiring practices, so that he can understand, they can vet the team that they're bringing in, or the vendors that they're bringing in, because you might actually be inviting the cybercriminal into your space to work at your space.Lesley Logan 13:01  Here's a perfect example. You can all witness it on the Ashley Madison Documentary, highly recommend it, highly recommend it. It's awesome. It is all the things not to do. One of their contractors is who took over the website, held it hostage, not for money, but because of values, and then released all that information that they were supposed to delete. But again, because they didn't hire people who would ask questions. No one was like, hey, do we actually delete the profiles? Will the people pay extra for us to delete the history? No, they didn't. And that's why they got sued. And it was a big bad thing. So just like if you are like, no way this didn't happen. It happens on a big level. Huge.Brad Crowell 13:39  Yeah. And alongside getting to know people before you bring them in. He also talked about once they're in, the value of having just a one-on-one conversation and stopping by their desk or their office and poking your head and actually getting to know them. He said that, you know, I mean, we live in a world today of text messages, phone calls, DMs. He said it's a quick dopamine hit, but nothing replaces the actual one-to-one interaction. So I always thought it was interesting. I mean, we work remotely, right? So it's actually hard for us to do that. Although we do spend a lot of time on Zoom calls and Google Meets and all those kinds of things where we like, like, sometimes we're just co-working with people virtually from the other side of the world. And you know, we are effectively spending time with them, even if it is remotely, but even that I like even more than just a text message or a DM because you really can't feel disconnected. It just feels like you're chatting to, you know, some random people. So yeah, great, really interesting observations. Yeah. Stick around. We'll be right back. All right. Finally, let's talk about those Be It Action items. What bold, executable intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Greg Tomchick. He provided three C's that individuals and leaders can use to foster trust within themselves and their relationships. And I thought this is really cool because he said, you know, half the time, half the battle for cybersecurity is building trust in your team and trust with your clients. And he said the three C's are consistency, compassion, and connection. And so which we love, because that overlaps. Two of those C's are overlapping OPC's core values which I, I love that. But he said, you have to have consistent engagement with someone that you're going to build trust with, you want to have an approach to understand where they're coming from, which is the compassion element of it, asking meaningful questions, like we were already talking about, sticking your head in their office and actually building trust, getting to know them, not just like, hey, what do you do for work? But like, who are you? And what's life like for you? And then with connection, building trust requires genuine connections, hopefully, through deep, you know, more than surface-level conversations. So what about you? Lesley Logan 15:50  Okay, so he talked about this, and I thought was so great, because you can apply this to anything. He said, set your own standards, what a bold statement. And he said, what is this piece? He said take a piece of paper and write one to five and say, what is the standard that I need to have to attract the right person? And this could be for co-working, this could be for relationship, this could be for friendship, this could be for anything like what are your standards? We had Jill Coleman on and she is one of the people who like really, really honed in with as when we worked with her about values. And like, values are the same as standards like and also you could also insert like boundaries, like these are things that are like, required to be with me or work with me or in a relationship with me of some kind. So write them down and have a clear list of the five most important standards you value. There you go. And then he said an example is that like, Greg has transparency and compassion as his values. And so he is really upfront when he meets new people about what those standards are. And it either weeds people out, or attracts the right people in. And they're going to help improve you because they're going to follow with those standards, which means you have to, as well.Brad Crowell 17:00  Yeah, I mean, it was interesting. You talked about just basically introducing himself and being like, hey, this is who I am. Take it or leave it. Lesley Logan 17:07  Yeah. You know, our friend Lauren Zoeller does this as well. She's like, really, like, upfront, she won't like she's like, here's what I need. Here's what it takes to be like a partner, this is the type of conversations I want to have. It's who I am. And you know what, like, I find that she has some very deep upfront conversations that can be very, like conversational, that may not happen on most people's like, fifth or 17th date, that she's having on like, before the date. So I actually think more and more people are wanting to do this, because life is short. We don't have a lot of time. And you don't want to, like get too involved with someone or something or some project, only to find out that the values and standards aren't going to align and you have to get out of it anyways.Brad Crowell 17:46  Yep, I totally agree. Well, love that. We really love Greg, it was, it's been awesome to get to know him in person. We've actually met up with him a couple times. And it's been just great. He's a standard guy. I think, you know, not only has he figured out something really amazing with his cybersecurity company about how to be a leader. But also it's allowed him the flexibility to go around and start speaking from stage about these types of topics. And, you know, it's just been fun to watch him grow. Lesley Logan 18:20  Yeah, love it. And also, I just want to say like, check us out, we had a whole cybersecurity and baseball conversation without really talking about either of those things. So there's very deep levels to all of these things that makes person up. So, thanks Greg for being our guest. How are you going to use these tips in your life? We want to know. I'm Lesley Logan. Brad Crowell 18:37  And I'm Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 18:38  Make sure you share this with a friend who needs to hear it. Please, please, please, pretty please with ice cream on top, please. It is how this podcast grows. We actually cannot get amazing, huge guests. I've had some of you request Michelle Obama, Oprah, like, of course, I want these people. They care about downloads peeps, I'm just gonna be really honest. So share this with a friend, write a review, it makes, it's like, it's currency test. Brad Crowell 18:59  And actually, we've had some people ask, like, how can I support you straight up, check out the links that we have from for our commercials, you know, for our ads, because our you know, they are companies that we actually do use their products, we actually have a relationship with them, we talk with them, they have set up a special link so that they know that you that we've referred you to them. And that's how you can support us absolutely. It helps us also grow the pod.Lesley Logan 19:27  Those referrals are how what pays for the pod and it helps us grow the pod. So please, please, please, that's how you can help us. Thank you so much. And until next time, be it till you see it. Brad Crowell 19:35  Bye for now. Lesley Logan 19:37  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.    Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.  Brad Crowell 20:19  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 20:24  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 20:28  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.  Lesley Logan 20:36  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.  Brad Crowell 20:39  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time. Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell reflect on a recent conversation with Lauren Zoeller, an expert practitioner in somatic therapy and founder of The Aligned Love Experience™. Lauren underscores the transformative power of qualified somatic practitioners in accelerating healing and breaking free from destructive patterns. Listeners will delve into insights from Lauren's interview, including how to recognize trauma responses and implement practical steps for effective somatic self-assessment. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Explanation of somatics as the language of the nervous system. How somatics differs from traditional talk therapy and its approach.The unhealthy cycle of codependency in therapy and coaching. How to do a somatic check-ins to monitor your body's responses. Recognize trauma as urgency and learn to slow down and be present.Episode References/Links:OPC Summer TourBalanced Body and ContrologyElevate Mentorship ProgramCambodia February 2025 Retreat40 Days of Pilates for $40Balanced Body and ContrologyLauren Zoeller WebsiteLauren Zoeller on InstagramAligned Love PodcastAligned Love Collective ExperienceEpisode 183 with Dr. Kelly BenderEpisode 376 with Jenny SchatzleEpisode 131 with Lauren ZoellerEpisode 132 Lauren Zoeller RecapEpisode 22 The Aligned Love  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. DEALS! Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox Be in the know with all the workshops at OPCBe It Till You See It Podcast SurveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates MentorshipFREE Ditching Busy Webinar  Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Follow Us on Social Media:InstagramFacebookLinkedIn  Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  I think what I like about these, it's not about having an answer. It's about just getting into your body and just notice how you're feeling and then like taking a moment to your present because that is where we can actually make true be it till you see it moments in our life is when we're not trying to respond from trauma. Lesley Logan 0:17  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:59  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the relieving convo I have with Lauren Zoeller in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that one, you should listen to it. You should listen to this one or you listen to this one and that one and then listen to the one I was on hers. Because Brad and I are both on hers. So you can just hear Lauren and Brad and my voices in your ear all day today. Brad Crowell 1:18  It's true. Lesley Logan 1:19  And you should. Lauren was first on the pod in Episode 131 and 132. Holy moly. That's like 160 episodes later. Well. Brad Crowell 1:30  It's been a minute. Lesley Logan 1:31  It's been a minute. Okay, so we'll get into Lauren and her awesomeness. And my ladies who want to learn more about your relationships and like how you feel the way you feel, that's what we're talking about. So stick around. But today is July 4th 2024 and it's the fourth of July. Thank you, Brad. Thank you for writing it out one way. Brad Crowell 1:47  July 4th is the fourth of July. Lesley Logan 1:50  It's totally only applicable to Americans. And, you know, sometimes it feels like a not great holiday anymore. But don't worry, we're positive around here. We're really excited. It's one of the biggest national holidays. Americans come together on July 4 to celebrate the nation's birthday and Independence Day. On this day, most Americans enjoy grills in their backyards, at beaches, or in parks. Some partake in parades or marches and enjoy the fireworks that are often launched at dusk. We kick off the festivities with details, trivia, and anything else you need to know about Independence Day. Happy Fourth! This website that we get all the descriptions of the holidays, this is the most bland description of what happens on the fourth. If you live in our neighborhood, everyone does their own firework situation. It is chaos. And our dogs are really chill. Our dogs do not mind. So we're at the pool today. Just so you know. We are at the pool with some of our podcasting friends actually. So some of the people who've been on the show Neda, Michael, couple others are all there. So we're just you know, hanging out on the fourth. Brad Crowell 2:49  Take it a holiday.Lesley Logan 2:50  And but other things are coming up that you need to know about is Summer Tour is one month away, we kick it off on August 4th. And most of the cities, many of the cities, workouts are sold out, the workshops are getting closed. So you want to go to opc.me/tour Brad Crowell 3:04  opc.me/tour Lesley Logan 3:05  To snag your spot. And also spots, if you want to come to two cities, some people are doing that, I can't wait to see them. It's called the groupies. It's the groupie rule. And also, our tour is powered by Balanced Body, which means we'll be bringing our Contrology Reformer, you could try that out. You could win a gift certificate to Balanced Body and Contrology. And by the way, you can still use my affiliate link when you use that gift certificate so, just saying, you might want to win that. The eLevate applications are going to open up in literally four days. And so if you're listening to this in real time to get your booty over to that waitlist, if you're wanting to find out more information, it's lesleylogan.co/elevate. And I spell my name L-E-S-L-E-Y because that's what you actually spell Lesley. And to the Leslies with they I out there, you're fine too (inaudible).Brad Crowell 3:48  Yeah, eLevate as a nine month long mentorship program for Pilates teachers who want to really dig in more classically, classical Pilates and connect all the dots across all the different pieces of equipments, stop class planning, all the things. Lesley Logan 4:04  Yeah, it's really amazing. Our fourth round has actually just finished their fourth out of five weekend. And it's just so cool to see how much they have changed in their teaching in their practice and how their understanding exercises. It's just really beautiful to see their growth. So yeah, we'll have a week for you to apply. And we are only taking 12 people in a group so you know, get on the waitlist and be quick on the application. Cambodia Retreat, October is super sold out. But February has spots in it and there's some amazing women already signed up. They're already getting excited. We have some great people I just can't even wait for that February one as well. So that's crowsnestretreats.com. Brad Crowell 4:45  Yeah, and lastly we got OPC. We want you to try out OPC we got a special offer just for you. This is the best offer that you're gonna get anywhere, 40 days for $40. It's a dollar a day y'all go to opc.me/40, opc.me/40.Lesley Logan 5:06  And you can keep coming into our community, you get to meet our crew, you get to, and in 40 days you'll have (inaudible) two different monthly themes, you'll be able to try out more than like five weeks of weekly themes, you can get your feedback on your form, and you come to a live class. You get to experience a true OPC membership in those 40 days. It's a dollar a day, we just found out that that's cheaper than a lemon, just so you know, that's cheaper than if you bought a lemon for every day. It's cheaper than that.Brad Crowell 5:31  How about that? Before we actually get into Lauren, we had a question today from Jaravia from YouTube. Thanks for asking Jaravia. What is the most beneficial reformer for core strength development? Should I get a basic one, a Tower or a Cadillac? Take it away, Lesley. Lesley Logan 5:51  So ideally, you don't buy a Reformer combined with anything in the most perfect sense of the world, you would have a Reformer, and you would have a Cadillac. And that would be like my dream for you. Okay, and it'd be a Contrology ideally, an 80 inch, just saying. Use our, use our discount link. But if you are looking for a combo equipment then I would do the Reformer Tower from Contrology. I do not like a reformer combined with a Cadillac. Okay, they are too high. So the Reformer is actually much higher off of the ground. So the little scarier, you cannot mount you cannot do a lot of the setups for the exercise the same way that you would, the bars are in the way so you got to do coordination and your legs are like opening up into bars. You, like you're constantly having to get your head through these bars. So I don't love that. So if you're going to do a combo, I would do a Tower Reformer combo, not a Cadillac Reformer combo. If you're asking like, should I get the tower or the Cadillac? I'm going to say Cadillac if you have the space because honestly, it's the best. But if you don't, or if price is a thing, then a wall unit is really amazing. Super, super great Contrology will have a wall unit out pretty soon. That's my vote for you.Lesley Logan 5:58  There you go. I love it. Well, if you have a question for us, you can ask it through DMs on Instagram or you can text us at 310-905-5534. Stick around we'll be right back. Brad Crowell 7:20  Okay, now let's talk about Lauren Zoeller. Speaker, author, host of The Aligned Love podcast and Founder of The Aligned Love Experience™, Lauren is a somatic and relationship expert who emphasizes understanding the body's responses to trauma. She advocates for recognizing these responses and encourages individuals to learn the language of their nervous system to break free from unhealthy patterns and find healthy relationships. Lesley Logan 7:47  Yeah, and she does relationships not just with love, but like at work with your work, with money, we have lots of relations in our life and how you treat one is how you treat a lot of them. So she kind of works with a lot of those things. I love a lot of the things that she said and we're gonna get into some other really, really good ones because you like those ones that I like too. To explain somatics, I think, is the best way to go into this podcast. It's like somatics is the language of the nervous system. And so it's like how your nervous system is sharing how it feels about things. And sometimes we can't articulate with how we're feeling we just don't feel right. And that's what's gonna be what somatics is, the language of your nervous system. And it's a language that a lot of us were never taught to speak, a lot of us were not taught to feel our feelings or like I was told like children should be seen not heard. So you'd be like sniffling, crying. It's like, hey, suck it up. But once you know the language of your nervous system, she said, You can shift the way you relate to anything in your life. And so she's worked with a lot of leaders, mostly women, and she was able to like really help them express their frustration. So it's just really cool to see how somatics can work because especially if you've done a lot of talk therapy, you've done a lot of like, you know, life coaching and like things haven't changed, and you're just in the same cycle. It sounds like what you need is somatics so you can actually understand your nervous system. What it's trying to tell you.Brad Crowell 9:08  Yeah, yeah. So the, the language of the nervous system, and I think it's good to understand that, when she's talking about it just sounded like oh, I don't know what it just sounds like therapy, right? But the thing that I liked, where she was talking about somatics is it's more than it's like the sum of it all is what it is, right? So there are different forms of therapy and somatics incorporates all different parts. So she wasn't knocking talk therapy. She said that's one piece of it, but it's only like 20% of it. You know and so there's more to it. And that's what I thought was really intriguing that there's a bigger (inaudible).Lesley Logan 9:49  And also, like, to truly do what she does, it's like eight years of like it's many, many years of training. This is not like you do this on a weekend, you guys, so like Brad Crowell 9:58  I got certified.Lesley Logan 9:59  So be mindful when like, working or looking at people who are doing somatics because it's becoming a hot thing right now is like I do somatics. And it's like, you know, it's not just your breathwork person who did a weekend course, like, you really want to find someone who is truly aligned because when you are doing somatic work, their shift can be like, it's important. So, I really appreciate how much training and studying she constantly does and how much she's done it already.Brad Crowell 10:25  Yeah, Lauren, also has a team of coaches, and they're all certified. So, yep, that's pretty awesome. Well, she also dug into this idea of being stuck forever in the therapy or the coaching. And she said, it's actually unhealthy. She said that, there's got to be a point where we are at a place where we can manage it ourselves without still being in the program, or still having a coach or, you know, and I can't remember if it was you or her who mentioned, you know, imagine going to college and never been allowed to graduate, like that just, there's no logic to that the way like, you start it, you take it, you pass, and then you leave.Lesley Logan 11:05  You know, I heard that I heard it from a cult podcast that I listen to.Brad Crowell 11:10  That was you. Lesley Logan 11:12  Because they were like, you, you get into a course program. And then they say, continue to have more and more courses that you need to buy to get closer and closer to God or the source or the leader or whatever it is, then like, you know, that's not healthy, that's a cult.Brad Crowell 11:26  Well, and she, she kind of laughed when she said it like this is probably bad for my business to say that there's a place where you should be able to move on, because, you know, but I think it's true, you know, and she started to talk about codependency and how people get stuck in the rut of the therapy, or the meetings, there's actually something called Codependents Anonymous, or, obviously, we've all heard Alcoholics Anonymous, or all these other things. Or maybe it is just the talk therapy, or maybe it's a codependency in relationships with someone that you're with. Right? And she started to talk about how, especially in the coaching world, we've kind of built into our programs the idea that people should stick around forever, right, stay with me forever. nd she said, we've been building really deep codependencies. I mean, we, if we're doing it that way, then we as coaches aren't necessarily doing our jobs. Lesley Logan 12:22  Yeah, yeah, it's true. It's true. Yeah, I also, before we get into our Be It Action Items, I just want to say like we also did a whole talk about the like the responses which is like the fight–fight, flight, fright and fun. (Inaudible) Yes. and fun is something a lot of women end up doing. It's a very people-pleasing, like, let me fix this thing. And I, so I highly encourage you to go listen to that whole segment on the pod because the way she explains it is really amazing. And when you start to learn how a your response is, it really helps you again, learn the language of your nervous system. Oh, I'm fawning right now. It's a little like, hello.Brad Crowell 13:04  That was a new one for me. I knew about, obviously, we've all heard of fight or flight. Freeze makes sense and then fawn was new. And I think we talked about that a few weeks ago, actually on the pod. But yeah, awesome. Okay, stick around. Brad Crowell 13:18  All right, so finally, let's talk about those Be It Action Items, what bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your conversation with Lauren Zoeller? Well, we were talking about learning the language of the nervous system, or actually that somatics is the language of the nervous system. So how do we learn that language? And she had a very methodical approach to learning this language. And she said, set a timer, you're going to do a somatic check in. She said, like every three hours, do it for a week, right? And she said, what, what you're going to do is pull out a pen and paper, you're gonna document the sensations and emotions that you're feeling at the time that it goes off. Right, so open your phone's Notes app, write the sensations and emotions that are present in your body, and then document what you were doing when it went off. She said, avoid rationalizing, this is important. She specifically did not say if you do explain why you're feeling those emotions, or sensations, just that you are write them down, and then focus solely on documenting what sensations, what emotions were present and what you were doing at the moment. That's it. That's all. Right? And she said, what this does is after a week it allows you to understand, you know, where your nervous system is, on a moment-to-moment basis. So if you're, maybe you're commuting, right, or maybe you're working or maybe you're at lunch, or maybe you're with the family, or maybe you're cooking dinner or whatever, and if you're doing this on a consistent schedule. Throughout the week, you can start to see how come every time I'm at work, you know, sweating, I'm like freaking out or I'm like feeling, feeling it in my chest or whatever, you know, start to identify those things. And then you're going to be equipping yourself with a different type of language around, you know, and a different perspective around how you're doing what you're doing. And that will lead to why you're doing it that way. You know, she has some resources available, you know, to help dig into this a little bit more. So we'll be putting that in the show notes. What about you? What was your biggest takeaway?Lesley Logan 13:38  She brought up like, discuss, like trauma as an urgency, which is a fight and action response like, so if you are trying to have instant gratification or you're, you're wanting things to like, happen over, overnight success, it's actually can lead to further trauma. So I know I'm someone who like need, like, Lauren and I are very similar. We just went a week together. And like, we like to know the answer now. Like right now, like, let's just know that now it's almost, I feel better if we've like, made a decision, you know, which is instant gratification that can just be a trauma response. And, and so she said, the things that are meant to be savored in life and make your life robust, are the ones where you actually slow down. And so she said, or, like, were able to build a space, like build it from a space of true presence and being grounded. So if you are like trying to make decisions from an instant spot, like take action kind of a thing, it can actually be, it can actuallyBrad Crowell 15:32  She said it's a trauma response. Lesley Logan 15:41  Yeah. Yeah. So it's your nervous system telling you like, I'm like, I'm activated right now. And so part of how you relate to things like let me just do this right now. But she's like really trying to get you to like, based on the other Be It Action, I'm like, take a moment. And just notice how you're feeling and not make and not make a reason, which is very hard for people to do. And we had Dr. Bender on. And she said, try not to reason with how you're feeling. Just notice how you're feeling because we're often wrong. So but what she then said is like, so when you're feeling an urgent need for immediate results, or instant gratification, recognize it's trauma response. And then in order to break the pattern, slow down and focus on being present, which is really hard to do. Brad Crowell 17:09  It's hard. Lesley Logan 17:09  It's really hard to do. So I just want to shout in Jenny Schatzle had a breathing exercise that we had in another Be It another Be It Action Item just a few weeks ago. Maybe it was a month ago at this point. Her breathing where we did see others just inhale exhale. That was it. That was it. That was her thing. So try that to get yourself present. So combine these two. And just, you know, I think what I like about this is that it's not about having an answer. It's about just getting into your body and just notice how you're feeling. And then like taking a moment to your present because that is where we can actually make true, be it till you see it moments in our life is when we're not trying to respond from trauma.Brad Crowell 17:54  Yeah, if you want to go back to that episode with Jenny, it's episode 376. Lesley Logan 17:59  Yeah. So I mean, Lauren's right. If you haven't yet listened to her first episodes on the pod, I highly recommend going back to those 131 and 132. And then, if you want to hear about Brad and I, and our aligned love on her podcast, you can do that on The Aligned Love podcast. Brad Crowell 18:15  Yeah, we'll put the link to her pod in the show notes. You can find it wherever pods are found, The Aligned Love. Well, anyway, it was super fun to have Lauren join us first, in person in Vegas, but also in-person in Nashville (inaudible).Lesley Logan 18:31  We spent more days with her in a week than we have seen her ever in life. So yeah, but you know, she's fabulous. She's family. And so I'm just really grateful that she does what she does because a lot of people need it. And she's, you know, changing lives out there. So I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell 18:46  And I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 18:48  Thank you so much for joining us today. You are amazing. In case you didn't remember in case someone told you that you are incredible and awesome. And we're so grateful for you. And if you haven't left a review for this podcast, please do it. Brad Crowell 18:57  Do it. Lesley Logan 18:58  That would be a really great gift to me. It's also a great way for you to be present. You could take note of what you learned from this episode. Brad Crowell 19:03  It would be a great gift to me, too. Lesley Logan 19:05  Yeah, great gift to Brad. You know Brad needs to get, his birthday's coming up, everyone. Leave a review for his birthday. (Inaudible) It is. So and then share this with a friend who needs. If you got a friend who's like you know, as one of those people who's just like acting out of trauma sometimes you're like, Oh, you can see it. Sometimes you can see others and we can see it in ourselves. Send this to them because you don't have to tell them what to do. You can just let them learn about it on their own. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Brad Crowell 19:27  Bye for now. Lesley Logan 19:29  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day.Lesley Logan 19:56  Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 20:11  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 20:16  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co. Brad Crowell 20:21  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan 20:28  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals. Brad Crowell 20:31  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Lesley Logan interviews Lauren Zoeller, a dating and relationship expert specializing in Somatic work. Lauren explains the importance of understanding the language of the nervous system and recognizing trauma responses for effective healing. She discusses the dangers of codependency and the necessity of active participation in the healing journey. Discover how to break free from survival patterns and transform your relationships with the help of her upcoming book and her actionable tools for trauma recovery, especially for those in their late 40s.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:The benefits of somatic therapy over traditional therapy.Identifying four survival responses: fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.Understanding somatics as the language of the nervous system.Recognizing and addressing codependency in therapy.Healing from trauma and understanding trauma responses.Breaking free from constant mental loops in trauma recovery.Episode References/Links:Lauren Zoeller InstagramLauren Zoeller WebsiteLauren Zoeller TikTokThe Aligned Love PodcastThe Rise of the Reader by Nick HutchisonNick Hutchison Episode 373A Little Bit Culty PodcastWill Rēzin Episode 16Dr. Bender Episode 183Guest Bio:Lauren Zoeller is a 7-figure entrepreneur, host of The Aligned Love podcast, speaker, and author. As the Founder of The Aligned Love Experience™, Lauren is an expert practitioner in reparenting, generational healing and Somatic Experiencing. Through her work, she created the proprietary Voice Activation Method™ that has been used to help thousands of men and women heal from past trauma and take ownership of their future. She is a certified dating & relationship coach and her insights have been featured on The Drew Barrymore Show, The NY Post, Business Insider, Medium, NBC News, Goal Cast, SHAPE magazine and other international media outlets. Lauren is a featured contributor for Ask Us Beauty, a unique magazine and membership platform that redefines beauty by helping women choose what beauty means to them both inside and out. She often speaks on topics such as Embodiment, Attachment Theory, Somatic Experiencing and Leadership. Her business endeavors are dedicated to helping build schools for underprivileged children in Honduras with The Boundless Foundation, a philanthropic organization whose mission is to end generational cycles of scarcity and poverty.  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. DEALS! Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox Be in the know with all the workshops at OPCBe It Till You See It Podcast SurveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates MentorshipFREE Ditching Busy Webinar  Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable Pilates Follow Us on Social Media:InstagramFacebookLinkedIn  Episode Transcript:Lauren Zoeller 0:00  I always say that Cymatics, it's the language of the nervous system, and it's a language that many of us were never taught to speak. We never learned it. You don't learn how to listen to your emotions and sensations when you're in middle school, grade school or high school. We were never taught that. So in a lot of ways, there's a learning curve in understanding the language. Lesley Logan 0:21  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.  Lesley Logan 1:03  All right, be it babe, I'm so excited to have you here for this episode. I'm obsessed with the woman we're about to listen to, it was just on the show before, we are going to talk about Cymatics you're in relationships and love and how we respond to things in our lives. So I know it's how you're gonna respond to everything, whether it's relationships, business money, like little sneak peek. But I think this is a really important episode to listen to. Because being until you see it, it's gonna require us to get us outside of our comfort zone to do things that are different. And our bodies are going to respond to those differences to be outside of our comfort zone. And those responses are actually going to let you know how you're feeling how you're reacting to something. And we need to know how to manage that and understand that so that we can do all the things we're supposed to do on this planet, you are the most amazing person. You're the only person who can do what you do the way that you do it. And so understanding how your body is reacting to things is actually going to be a superpower that you will need in all things in your life. So without further ado, here is Lauren Zahler. Oh my god, this is so fun. Okay, this is also the strangest. I'm gonna leave this all in. You guys. We're doing to be a pod in real life with one of my dearest best friends I absolutely adore which has been on the bigger pot before it Lauren's all you're here. Can you tell everyone who you are and what you rock get in case they haven't heard your first episode?Lauren Zoeller 2:21  Oh my gosh, what do I rock at? So I am, I'm a somatic dating and relationship expert. And first of all, I'm just so excited that we're getting to do this in real life.Lesley Logan 2:30  I know, maybe we should have done this, got excited about doing this before. But it's really fun. Lauren Zoeller 2:35  Yeah, it is fun. So I'm a somatic dating and relationship expert. I help both men and women really heal their relational trauma so that they can find healthy partnership. So I kind of geek out on relationships, but I do it through the lens of the nervous system, which a lot of people are used to traditional talk therapy. And I really get into the body and work with the nervous system so that you can heal some of these relational patterns that feel like you just do the patterns that you just can't seem to get over when it comes to relationships. Lesley Logan 3:02  Yes, you mean like your, you date the same person over and over again expecting it to go better? Lauren Zoeller 3:06  Yeah, yeah. Or you get in the same relationship dynamics and you find yourself sabotaging in the same way over and over, maybe you find someone that's really healthy, but it feels boring. And so you just Lauren Zoeller 3:18  We all remember that episode with Keri. Yes. Exactly. So it just you keep imploding these relationships, that could be really good for you. So it shows up in different ways. And also, it's more than just romantic relationships, too. It's like we have a relationship to money, we have a relationship to ourselves, to our health. And so how we do one thing is how we do everything. And it's all based in whether you feel safe, or whether you're in survival and your nervous system. So it's looking at that and regulating it. Lesley Logan 3:45  Yeah, I love this. I know in, the first time I had you on you kind of explained the difference between like what somatic work can look like, just in case anyone hasn't, can we get like a little 101 definition of it so everyone's on the same page?Lauren Zoeller 3:56  So somatic work is it's therapy of the nervous system. So most people when they go to traditional talk therapy, or even if they work with a mindset coach, they're looking at, cognitively, how can I put patterns together and try to shift what my mind thinks about when it's triggered or when it experiences something traumatic. What somatic work does is it looks at where did your body go into a survival response, when it experienced something that was too fast, too much or too soon, to properly get to safety. And these responses, they get stuck, they get stuck in your body. You don't look at them, and you don't regulate them, then you're going to continue to trip over the same wire and you're going to feel it in your nervous system. So an example of this, right, and I kind of like to give my own example here, I dated, I go to in relationships with alcoholics and loved them because they were projects and I felt like if I could save them if I could lead them to coming home to themselves and getting sober than I would be worthy of love. Right? I learned that at a very young age, because I grew up in a whole long line of Polish women, my mom taught me that you don't get to sit down and eat your dinner until everyone in the room has eaten first. So I was taught that my happiness was dependent on other people being happy first, and this, this survival response that my happiness was dependent on other people, it was alive in my nervous system, because that's the only thing that was familiar. It was the only thing I learned. So fast forward to becoming an adult, I then just started to continue to attract these types of men that reiterated that survival response because it felt familiar. So somatic work, taught me to go into my body, recognize that survival response and get it to safety so that I can break that survival pattern. Lesley Logan 5:54  So then you can, you actually can make changes to things whereas, if, not that talk therapy can't do that, but I feel like it's longer and/or you're kind of having to do things as it's happening. Lauren Zoeller 6:00  Exactly. Yeah. Well, and I had been in talk therapy for almost 10 years, like I had a whole team of therapists and mindset coaches and I had spent almost six figures in trying to break the cycles. But when we talk about our trauma, we are actually re-traumatizing ourselves, in a lot of ways, because we're not getting to what actually happened in the body when that survival response first set in, and most of the time, it's generational, we look at relationships. So it's just looking at trauma in a different way. It's a whole body approach versus just hanging out in the brain.Lesley Logan 6:44  So as far as like how the body's responding, can you give us some examples? Because I do think that I'm like, like thinking about some of my like, perfectionist overachievers, who are amazing, but also like, not always as in tune with how their body is interpreting things like what are some of those things they're feeling as I remember, I had an amazing therapist. She did somatics. And she was going, where are you feeling that I'm like, where should I feel it? Yeah, where am I? Where should I feel it? I feel it there. Yeah, yeah.Lauren Zoeller 7:10  So if I heard that, I would be like, ah, this is very much a freeze response. So you may not be able, it can be two things, right? You are either frozen and you have no sensation whatsoever. You feel kind of flighty or you feel disassociated. We've all been in that space where we know we need to do something, right? Like we have this crazy long list as an entrepreneur of all these things that we need to check off. And what do we end up doing? We end up scrolling on social media and we don't get to any of it. That is a sign of disassociation, that is a sign of freeze in the system. And so until you start to look at and know those survival responses, because there's four of them, there's fight, which is how it sounds, there's flight, which again, is how it sounds, freeze, which is what I just described, and then there's fun, which is people-pleasing. It's shutting down your voice in, let's say, you're on a sales call and you know, what you're worth. And next thing, you know, you're like giving away the house. Right? Because you feel like I need to be accepted. I just need this person to work with me as a survival response. So it's like looking at those different responses in the system like I'm curious about them. Lesley Logan 8:20  Okay, this is really cool. I love the way you're describing this because, again, as the (inaudible) like, I'm like, oh, I just need to have the right answer. So what's the, what's the? What's the right answer for you? You know, I feel like, it's an easier way to kind of understand. Oh, right now I want to run away. Okay, so that is a survival response. And so we, we talk therapy be like, why do I want to run away? And somatics would be like, where am I feeling running away in my body? Is that the how are...? Lauren Zoeller 8:20  Yep. Yeah, so talk therapy would be okay, where did this pattern come from? How can I connect it cognitively to something that I experienced in the past? I get it working in the body through somatics would be okay, what are the sensations and the emotions that are associated with me wanting to run away? And can I be with that and as a somatic practitioner, I'm then allowing my clients to be with that sensation. And we give it space to renegotiate in the body. So the next time that you come up to an event that's similar to the one you want to run away from your body goes, Oh, I'm actually not in threat right now. I don't have to run away. I can stay here because I feel safe. And that's what somatic experiencing does it, renegotiates those survival responses.Lesley Logan 9:29  I think it's if this sounds so awesome, because it gives people part of their life back. And it allows people to have new experiences in even same relationships because I do feel like not that not that I want anyone to like renegotiate a bad relationship that they're in. But if you have, like a (inaudible) with your parents, and they're still alive, you actually don't have to continue to repeat the same behaviors because you can change how your body is going to feel in those situations. Lauren Zoeller 9:57  Exactly. Yeah, and It's, it gives people hope, because I can't tell you how many leaders I have worked with. And really just women that come in through, you know, my programs that they're frustrated, they're like, gosh, I have been I've been in therapy, I've been doing all the things that I people tell me I need to be doing. But I can't seem to move the needle here. And I always get, I never wanted to be like my mom, I never wanted to be like my dad. But here I am as an adult. And like, I'm just like my parents, and I don't understand why and how this happened. And looking at your relationships from the lens of somatics gives you a very clear picture as to why it's happening. Because the only thing you ever learned in your body, it's what feels safe, even though it's a false sense of safety. Lauren Zoeller 9:59  Yeah, you got into this, because of your own experience. And you have now helped so many women, what are you looking forward to helping people with now? And like, how are you kind of working your business to do that? Because I know that you've you, you've helped so many, what's the next step?Lauren Zoeller 11:03  Yeah. So I do have a book coming out next year. It's really exciting. I know, I'm so excited about it. So hopefully, that will reach more people and get this work into more hands. Because I feel like, you know, I just own it, it's expensive to work with me long term. And, but I also have this really big mission on my heart that I want to get this work into as many hands as possible. So hopefully, the book will be able to do that. But I work, I really like to say that if you are struggling in relationship to anything in your life, that's where you would come and absorb the work that I teach. So really, for next year, I have the book, and I'm getting ready to launch a membership, a really affordable membership, so you can get your hands on some of this work. So that's what's coming in the future. Lesley Logan 11:50  I think that's really exciting. Because I think like when you have the tools, and you have these keys, and you can see how it's affected your own life, but then also the women that you're working with. It is like how do I get this to help more people but also not water it down? And sometimes it's just exposure? Like, I think, especially if you're going, I'm 41, right? So anyone who's listening, a lot of them are in their 40s and 50s. You get to a point, it's almost kinda like, is it too late for me like, I feel like I should have done this a lot, a lot sooner. And so I think it's really cool that you could have different ways of people becoming aware, because I don't actually think that many people a lot more people are talking about somatics. And maybe it's just because my algorithm is showing me that but I don't think as many people are aware of this work. And so sometimes it's just getting them into awareness for them to have that impact. Lauren Zoeller 12:36  Yeah, I always say that somatics, it's the language of the nervous system. And it's a language that many of us were never taught to speak, we never learned it, you don't learn how to listen to your emotions and sensations when you're in middle school grade school, high school, we were never taught that. So in a lot of ways, there's a learning curve in understanding the language. And it's just like, you know, learning to speak Mandarin, or Chinese or any other language, you're not, you're not going to just show up to your first class and be able to speak yeah, like speak Mandarin fluently, you're going to have to learn the you know, the alphabet and the phrases and put things together. Your nervous system is the same way it is a language. And so my hope with the book is that it will start, it's called The Missing Language of Love. And my hope is that people can have access to this language because most people don't have it. Lesley Logan 13:29  Yeah, I think that's really cool. I want to go into like, you talked about the missing language of love. And earlier you (inaudible), anything. So you're known a lot for like, relationships with love and as a partner. But is, is that the only love that this book is towards? Or is, like, for any kind of love?Lauren Zoeller 13:51  For the love of everything, right? So because again, once you know the language of your nervous system, you can shift the way that you relate to anything in your life. And so a lot of people that I work with, even though they come in for relationships and dating, they're struggling in their romantic relationships. How you do one thing is how you do everything. Yeah. So if they're struggling, and they have patterns showing up in their relationship, romantic relationships, they're also struggling in that same vein, when it comes to their relationship to money, like they're usually the same patterns. So this book will teach you it's a, it's a roadmap. So there are a lot of exercises within the book. And you can use it I tell people go through it for your romantic relationships, and then go back and go through it and look at your relationship to money, your relationship to your health, like it is a roadmap that you can use for all of it. Lesley Logan 14:39  Okay, I love this. So you guys probably heard the episode already with Nick Hutchison, and he has a book called The Rise of the Reader and his book teaches you like how to absorb more from what you are reading. He's a big self-development book person. And he said that he puts on a Post-it note on the inside cover like what his intention for the book is, so you guys can just take that lesson and just apply it to this like, okay, my intention first is romantic relationships. And then now I'm rereading it for money. So that and he says, every time you open the book, reread the intention, so you can keep that that's how he absorbs most. So I'm just like connecting to that, so, you guys, because I just think that that's how I would want to go through the book is like with one idea at a time. So I, my overachievers, you can't do three ideas at the same time. That'sLauren Zoeller 15:23  It won't work, it won't work. Lesley Logan 15:26  Can you tell me what if we don't work on our somatics? Like, what happens to us? What does our future look like if we just decide not to?Lauren Zoeller 15:35  Very dark, And I, it's not, I mean, you're gonna be fine. But you just have to get you have to have a moment where you say, okay, do I want a different reality for myself? Period. And every person that I know that has not done somatic work, they're kind of living in the same dynamic that their parents had. And so I'm not saying that that is always going to be the case. But if you don't look at your healing from the lens of your nervous system, you're only attacking 20% of the healing puzzle, like the cognitive piece is important to go through talk therapy, and to talk about your problems, you need to make that link cognitively. But it's 20%. If you think about from your neck down to your toes, that's like 80% of your body. So and most people don't ever look at that. So, again, yeah, maybe you're going to talk therapy, maybe you're talking to your problems, but you're really only addressing 20% of the healing puzzle when you do that. So you're going to stay stuck, where you are, may have a little bit of change. But you're going to revert back to your old patterns.Lesley Logan 16:42  Do you find, once you know this language, and once you've done work on it and understanding it, is this something that you can continue to work through with yourself? Can you like work through yourself? Or do you have someone you, like how, I'm just wondering, like, what's, what's the process of someone who's going through, learns to work, learns the language and then like, stuff happens? Like you're known, just like, it's not like just like life's squeaky clean?Lauren Zoeller 17:04  Yeah, yeah. It's funny, I interviewed Will Rezin on my podcast last week, because episode just came out, and I need to connect you two, by the way, but he was talking about that, because he had, he is also a somatic practitioner. And he had done all of this work for so long. And he studied with Shamans in Peru, and his mother was a therapist, and he kind of like surrounded himself with all of these personal development tools. And it wasn't until really late in his career, that he found somatic work. And he said, you know, after I was facilitated enough, and I really understood, had somebody else guide me into the language of my nervous system, I can now walk myself through this. And so I tell all my clients, my goal is for you to not meet me anymore. And I think that that's, we've built this really deep codependency in the personal development world. And it's not healthy, it's not healthy to need a coach for the rest of your life. It's not healthy to need a therapist for the rest of your life. We aren't conditioned to believe that. And I mean, from a business perspective, it's a really awful business model. For someone to not need me, right. But the truth is, is that you shouldn't need a therapist for the rest of your life. You shouldn't really need a coach for the rest of your life or else they're not doing their job. Lesley Logan 18:21  Yeah, you know, yeah, no, I was there's a podcast I was involved, A Little Bit Culty, and they said like, imagine if you went to college, and they just never let you graduate. Like that would never be okay. Like anyone you work with. There should be a point at which you you've graduated otherwise, maybe it's a little I culty.Lauren Zoeller 18:37  Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And we need to normalize that because I think the personal development world has become so you need to be in it forever and ever and ever, and you never get to leave. Lesley Logan 18:48  Well and also like how is that at all abundance mindset, which is what the personal development world preaches. It's like you should have an abundance mindset. Well, if you did as the coach, you would be okay with people graduating and you would trust that there'd be more people coming through. So I really love hearing that the goal is like you've learned these tools to a point that you can actually use them on your own and you're not so reliant on other people and I do think it's true because like, I have people in my life who were raised to be in this codependent relationships and like they have therapists which is really great, but they just develop another codependent relationship, you know? Lauren Zoeller 19:23  Yeah. It's funny I was, I was on a call with a client yesterday and she was speaking about this very same thing. You know, her she grew up in a household where her mother went to codependent anonymous. And next thing you know, she was like, my mom was in AA my mom was an alcoholic, but she was going to AA meetings and she was going to like eaters anonymous meetings. She was just conditioned to have this codependency and so I really want to talk about that, right, and put it out into the world because I feel like a lot of people aren't talking about how bad it is. Lesley Logan 19:52  Yeah, I know you and I've talked to like, offline about, you know, it's very interesting. I get really disenchanted. Sometimes with what we do, because I'll go to a conference, I'll go and hear different speakers, we'll all be on the same status (inaudible) I'm like, what are they talk, what are they saying? Like, you're making people find more things. Or you're making them think that they need all these things, there is not actually a template out there for any business that's going to always work for everyone all the time. Because the truth is that we're all very unique individuals, and we have different ways of responding to obstacles in our way that like, even if he did everything the exact same way, it still wouldn't be the exact same result, because we're coming out with different strengths, different weaknesses, different ways of seeing things. And I do think that it can be really scary and sometimes dark in the self-development world. How, obviously, we don't ever want to work with you. But what are some like signs? Or do you have anything that you kind of like us to make sure that you don't end up working with or studying with anyone this ultimate world that could maybe be like a red flag of like, this might not be a good program? Lauren Zoeller 20:58  Yeah. I mean, I think, a big thing for me, if someone comes to a, let's say, a discovery call with me, or someone on my team, and they are, they're already in defensive mode, they're like defense, they don't think that this is going to work. They've tried everything, I will just tell them I don't think that this work, is it's I don't think it's the right time for you to be here. Like, that's a big one. But also, when people come to me, and they talk about, well, is this gonna heal me? Like, am I going to be healed when I'm done with this? I'm like, that's a big red flag, right? Because nothing and no one can heal you. Healing is a lifelong journey. But the best thing that you can do is equip yourself with the right tools to be able to facilitate yourself through whatever you need. So that's a big red flag for me is when somebody shows up and they're like, or when someone says, this work healed me. Because it's, it's there's so many different factors. Yeah, in order for that to be true. Lesley Logan 21:53  Yeah, I love that what you're saying it's like there's this goes both ways. Someone who's coming as a client wanting these, like, like, this has to work, that kind of almost desperation. It's like, this is probably even like our business coaching for fitness instructors. People are coming like, I need this to work. And I'm like, so here's the deal. Like, I can't make the business decisions daily for you. I'm not in the biz I'm not writing to, you have to do all the work. Yeah. So it will work if you do all the work. But is it gonna work tomorrow as it were yesterday, that's not true. If you're all out there interviewing different people to work with, they should be honest with you. And they shouldn't be saying this isn't the right thing for you, or here's what is possible. But here's how long it could take like, there has to be honesty there. And if it's not transparent, or they're just telling what you want to hear, like, those are big red flags.Lauren Zoeller 22:37  Big red flags. Yeah. Well, and also, and this is just a point of curiosity for people to think about the need for something to work. And for it to work right now. That is a trauma response. And so you have to start to get curious around that, because it's this that is flight in action. That's what it looks like you're in this space of feeling like it needs to be urgent. And really, trauma is urgency, its urgency of needing things now, because when we look at the definition of trauma it's something that happened too fast, too much too soon. It is in that space of urgency. So things happen. And you and I've talked about this, like the instant gratification, and the instant, overnight success, that's very much in the personal development world, can cause a whole myriad of, of trauma. And really, the things that are meant to be savored in life, and that are really beautiful, and make your life robust, are the ones where you slow down. And you were able to build it from a space of true presence and being grounded. And so if you aren't there, and you're constantly wanting immediate results, that is a sign that you are in trauma, and you need to work through that. Lesley Logan 23:50  It's so interesting. I could be having a trauma response in my business. That's not necessarily, the trauma wasn't from business, it could be from something else in my life. And that's how it's showing up. (inaudible)Lauren Zoeller 23:59  Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah. And it's a relationship, you have a relationship to your business. So you have to look at how are you showing up in that relationship? And what from the past has led you to this place where you feel like, oh, my gosh, I need instant results right now, or the house is gonna catch on fire. Lesley Logan 24:17  See, I think it's fascinating, cuz I do think I had Dr. Bender on many years ago. And you guys we'll put her second episode in the show notes. But she talked about, we tend to as humans, try to make a reason to the stress for feelings. I'm having this like any instant gratification. So we're trying to figure out the reason for that in the head, right? A cognitive reason. And she gave the example of like, whenever I walk into office, I get super, super stressed out. And so it's my job that's causing this and she's always like, try not to create reason, because what you logically will connect might not actually be the thing that it is and you could totally switch a career and actually have the exact same feelings because it's a trauma response as to something else. We have to do the somatic work to regulate it. Lauren Zoeller 25:02  Yeah, well, and it's important to note too, that the nervous system again, it doesn't speak in story. So going into story and making meaning about something over and over and living in what I call monkey brain, which are like those constant loops. That is the flight response. That's what it looks like to notice yourself in an actual trauma response, when you have those looping thoughts, like everybody can relate to being broken up with, and then laying in bed at night and trying to sleep and your brain won't shut off. And you're like, oh, my gosh, well, what if I would have done this? And what if I would have would have, he would have done this different? What were the you know, you have these like, constant ruminating thought Lesley Logan 25:39  Replay the conversation in your head over and over.Lauren Zoeller 25:43  Yeah, that is a trauma response. And it's usually linked to you not being chosen at some point in your life. And so you went into reasoning, to pacify and to cope with what happened. So if you're not looking at how your body is responding in a moment-to-moment basis, you're gonna keep living those loops over and over again, you're gonna keep, I call it burning the ships in your business because your brain takes over and kind of sabotages what's actually happening.Lesley Logan 26:12  Okay, this has been amazing, because I feel like I've learned, I feel like fight is an easy one to kind of understand how that response is but having, we've gone through real amazing what it looks like for the flight and for the freeze and for the fun. So this has been so educational, obviously, we're happy to have you back when your book comes out, because I can't wait to read it, I will have to figure out a way to like, make sure our listeners get their hands on it. We're gonna take a brief break, we're gonna find out where people can find you, follow you, work with you. Lesley Logan 26:37  All right, Lauren, where can people find you, follow you, work with you? Where do you like to hang out? Where's your favorite place?Lauren Zoeller 26:44  Okay, so you can find me online at my website, laurenzoeller.com. I'm most active on Instagram. So you can find that, you can find that @LaurenZoeller on Instagram. In Tiktok, @coachLaurenZoeller. And I think that's all the places that I hang out. I do have a podcast, which you're about to Lesley Logan 26:59  I know. Lauren Zoeller 26:59  So you can listen to that. It's the Aligned Love podcast. Lesley Logan 27:02  Yes, you guys, you can listen, wherever you listen to this one, just go find it. We'll put it in the show notes. But sometimes it's not easy to go. Just google that. You I think that's really, it's really cool that you have your podcast because I think having this we have to hear it a few different times for different ways. So it's great for people to have you in their ears more often. Yeah. Well, you've given us so many amazing bits of information about ourselves. But for our, you know, people who want an action step, what's a bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted step they can take to be it till they see it? Lauren Zoeller 27:36  So I would suggest beginning to learn the language of your nervous system. And do this by what's what I like to call a somatic check in. So if you are a tangible person, get out your phone, try this for a week, get out your phone, set a timer on your phone to go off every three hours. When that timer goes off. All you're gonna do get out your notes on your, on your iPhone, or your Android, we were talking about that earlier, whatever, you have no judgment here. And I want you to document the sensations and the emotions that are present in your body. And then I want you to write down what you were doing when the timer went off. Note I did not say I want you to write down your sensations, emotions, and tell me why you're feeling them. All they want you to do is document what sensations what emotions were present and what you were doing. What this does is it starts to give you the language of where your nervous system is in a moment to moment basis. So for instance, if every time your timer goes off, you're sitting down to write an email. And you notice that you're sweating, and your heart wants to jump out of your chest. You're probably in a flight response when you're sitting down and you're working. And so once you start to understand this language, then you have the language to be able to shift where you need to go from survival to safety and you can start to take that next step. So awareness, the somatic checking gives you awareness of the language that you're speaking Lesley Logan 28:54  Oh, I love this you guys. This is such an easy and free. I love a free tool. Ah, Lauren, I adore you. I'm so happy that we randomly met by an email introduction. Because you're just one of the favorite people in my life and I love getting to see you in real life. This is just so wonderful. You guys, how are you going to use these tips in your life. We want to know. Tag Lauren Zoeller and tag the Be It Pod, share this with a friend if you are hearing anything like oh my friend is a people pleaser. Oh, my friend is like this. All you have to do is actually send the episode to them, you don't actually have to tell them you are a pleaser and people-pleasing mode, you can actually send it to them and allow them to go on their own amazing journey. So thank you, Lauren. Thank you everyone for listening. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 29:40  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day.   Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 30:22  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 30:27  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co. Brad Crowell 30:32  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan 30:39  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals. Brad Crowell 30:42  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Join us for an insightful conversation with my dear friend, Lauren Zoeller, as we explore the intricate connection between the nervous system and our relationships. Lauren shares her expertise on understanding the language of the nervous system and harnessing its power to build deeper, more authentic connections. Discover practical tips and techniques for mastering nervous system communication, fostering emotional resilience, and nurturing heartfelt relationships. Tune in to uncover the untapped potential of your nervous system and transform the way you connect with others. Connect with Lauren: INSTAGRAM TIKTOK 'Manifest Your Dream Relationship' Course: https://laurenzoeller.com/manifest-your-dream-relationship-2/ Connect with Tori: TIKTOK INSTAGRAM COACHABLE YOUTUBE COACHABLE INSTAGRAM COACHABLE FB COMMUNITY Join My Women's Community Membership -Revive Women OUR SPONSORS: Interested in experiencing EESystem technology for yourself? Go to unifydhealing.com/COACHABLE Ready to elevate your wellness journey with Liquivida's innovative approach? Experience the benefits for yourself by calling 1-844-548-2100 to book a session at any of their South Florida locations. Don't forget to mention The Coachable Podcast when scheduling your appointment! Additionally, delve deeper into optimal health strategies by grabbing a copy of Sam Tejada's insightful book, "How to Win in Modern Wellness," available on Amazon. Transform your well-being today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to today's ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. TBH dating can be stressful and exhausting if you've been on the hunt for “the one” for a while. Whether you're newly single or a seasoned app swiper, we gotchu! We're throwing it back to the most important lesson we learned from relationship coach Lauren Zoeller: The non-negotiables you should establish going into any relationship, and an insightful exercise to help you figure out your needs in a relationship, and how to give them to yourself, first. Consider this the healthiest dating pep talk you'll hear, in 7 minutes. Lauren is a CTA certified Love & Relationship Coach, motivational speaker and podcast host. She's the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a coaching program that teaches women how to attract love. She's been featured in international publications like Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Thrive Global, Money Inc., and more. Believe us when we say love is her language!Listen to our full episode with Lauren here.Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.For show notes and more adulting tips, visit: teachmehowtoadult.caSign up for our monthly adulting newsletter:teachmehowtoadult.ca/newsletter Follow us on the ‘gram:@teachmehowtoadultpodcast @yunggillianaire@cailynmichaanFollow Lauren:laurenzoeller.com@laurenzoeller PS: If you've been dreaming of pivoting into podcasting but aren't sure where to start or how to grow, check our consulting services at teachmehowtoadult.ca/howtopodcast. Sign up for our monthly adulting newsletter:teachmehowtoadult.ca/newsletter Follow us on the ‘gram:@teachmehowtoadultmedia@gillian.bernerFollow us on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult

On today's episode, we delve deep into the challenges and triumphs of women in dentistry. In today's episode, recorded live from a webinar within the Dental Success Network (DSN), we're tackling a subject close to the hearts of many professionals: "Recharging the Dental Battery: Strategies for Dentist Burnout, Client Care and Nervous System Resilience," hosted on November 28, 2023. We're joined by an inspiring panel: Ashlee Hirschfeld, Summer Kassmel, & special guest Lauren Zoeller, a somatic therapist. Lauren Zoeller's Expertise: As a somatic therapist, Lauren brings a unique perspective on how dental professionals can navigate the physical manifestations of past traumas and relational issues, providing insights into how these experiences shape our current well-being. Trauma's Impact: Lauren discusses the profound effects of trauma on entrepreneurs and leaders, particularly in high-stress environments like dental practices. Survival Responses: Our panel dives into the nervous system's survival responses, crucial knowledge for understanding reactions to daily stressors. Healing through Awareness: The importance of awareness and choice in the healing process is highlighted, especially when dealing with survival states that often go unnoticed. Strategies for Resilience: Listeners will gain practical strategies to develop a flexible nervous system that can withstand the rigors of dental practice. If you're finding value in these discussions and want to connect with like-minded dental professionals, the Dental Success Network is your go-to community. We're more than a network; we're a support system dedicated to your success and well-being. Join us at DSN to access a wealth of resources, including more episodes like this one. Remember, this is only Part 1 of our in-depth discussion. Tune in tomorrow for Part 2, where we'll continue to explore strategies for combating burnout and enhancing client care. Don't miss out on more expert advice and practical tips that can transform your practice and personal life. EPISODE RESOURCES https://www.truedentalsuccess.com Dental Success Network Subscribe to The Dentalpreneur Podcast

We're ringing in Valentine's Day with a love week series on all things relationships, dating, and sex! Welcome to today's ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. There's an ongoing debate between people who swear by dating apps, and people who swear they'll never use them, so we're throwing it back to relationship coach Lauren Zoeller's advice and fresh takes on how to use apps to your benefit, and how to get dates in this day and age.Lauren is a CTA certified Love & Relationship Coach, motivational speaker and podcast host. She's the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a coaching program that teaches women how to attract love. She's been featured in international publications like Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Thrive Global, Money Inc., and more. Believe us when we say love is her language!Listen to our full episode with Lauren here.Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.Follow Lauren:laurenzoeller.com@laurenzoellerOur show is produced by:Gillian Berner, Host, Producer & EditorOlivia Nashmi, Audio EngineerKyla Killackey, Digital EditorCarolyn Schissler, Designer & Web ProducerFor advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. PS: If you've been dreaming of pivoting into podcasting but aren't sure where to start or how to grow, check our consulting services at teachmehowtoadult.ca/howtopodcast. Sign up for our monthly adulting newsletter:teachmehowtoadult.ca/newsletter Follow us on the ‘gram:@teachmehowtoadultmedia@gillian.bernerFollow us on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult

Brief summary of show: In this episode, we explore the concepts of generational trauma and its impact on our relationships. We also learn about somatic therapy, a unique approach to therapy that focuses on the nervous system and its connection to our emotional health.   Listen in as we talk about: - Introduction (00:39) -What is somatic therapy and how does it work? (03:44) -What happens when the Nerveous System is not regulated (04:50) -What is generational trauma and how does it affect our relationships? (06:38) -Physical elements (08:20) -How to identify and regulate our nervous system's protective responses (10:18) -How to get out of Survival mode (13:47) -Where to find Somatic Therapy (15:07) -How Somatic Therapy can heal relationships (16:03) -Importance of couples getting in therapy together (18:06) -What happens to your body when you're in Survival mode 24/7 (20:09) -Offline Brain (21:44) -Final thoughts (23:00)   Notes from Natalie: Sign Up for Natalie's Newsletter : https://marvelous-designer-6863.ck.page/fd348899af Seeking Health: www.natalietysdal.com/favorites  Before you go on Camera: https://www.natalietysdal.com/mediatraining Podcast Launch Guide: https://www.natalietysdal.com/mediatrainin Anti Burnout Worksheet: https://marvelous-designer-6863.ck.page/b6d4b2c9d2   Connect with Natalie  

Lauren Zoeller is a 7-figure entrepreneur, host of The Aligned Love podcast, speaker, and author. As the Founder of The Aligned Love Experience™, Lauren is an expert practitioner in reparenting, generational healing and Somatic Experiencing. Through her work, she created the proprietary Voice Activation Method™ that has been used to help thousands of men and women heal from past trauma and take ownership of their future. She is a certified dating & relationship coach and her insights have been featured on The Drew Barrymore Show, The NY Post, Business Insider, Medium, NBC News, Goal Cast, SHAPE magazine, Ask Us Beauty and other international media outlets. She often speaks on topics such as Embodiment, Attachment Theory, Somatic Experiencing and Leadership. Her business endeavors are dedicated to helping build schools for underprivileged children in Honduras with The Boundless Foundation, a philanthropic organization whose mission is to end generational cycles of scarcity and poverty. Connect with Lauren: Email: lzoeller@laurenzoeller.com Website: laurenzoeller.com Instagram: @laurenzoeller Twitter: @laurenzoeller

How can you fall in love with the person of your dreams and have the best relationship ever?Lauren Zoeller is a relationship expert who helps men and women find and keep healthy love. Lauren had relationship struggles through her early 30s and had bad boyfriend after bad boyfriend until she found out what was wrong. And then she was able to attract the man of her dreams.If you're ready to find out what you are doing wrong that is preventing you from finding and keeping the right person, then it's time to get closer to your Best You with the one and only Lauren Zoeller! In this episode:01:49 How did you start to change your approach to relationships so that you could attract the right person?13:08 How do you approach talking with your clients about not being too picky when dating?15:56 How can someone gain more awareness on whether or not they feel safe with someone?20:26 How should you handle times when you're emotionally "triggered" by your significant other?23:33 How do people best approach talking with their significant other about a time when they were triggered?27:16 What are some of the relationship habits that you encourage people to practice on a regular basis?31:29 What do you think are some of the most important conversations to have with your partner before marriage?36:40 Lauren's 3 keys to getting closer to her best self? Welcome to The Best You Podcast where we explore how to improve all 6 areas of life - health, personal, career, financial, spiritual, and relational. My name is Nick Carrier, an entrepreneur, fitness trainer, and motivational speaker. I was going down the traditional path of working a 9 to 5 until my mentor saw something in me, I quit my job, and started my own business. My mission is to help you gain clarity on how to become your Best You.  Need a kickstart to build some momentum and motivation? Try our 1-Week FREE Trial of the Virtual 10-Week Transformation. You'll receive access to:1. 3 Video Workouts2. My Goal-Setting Framework3. The 5X5 Meal Plan Check it out at nickcarrier.com/freetrial

In this captivating episode, Lauren Zoeller, accomplished Love and Relationship coach and host of The Aligned Love podcast, joins Mimi for a deep dive into the realm of relationships and emotional well-being. Lauren and Mimi engage in a profound discussion structured around four essential themes: Wanting Love, Finding Love, Losing It, and Keeping It. Within the intricate landscape of dating, Lauren imparts her profound wisdom on embracing radical responsibility and transformative mindset shifts. She challenges prevailing notions about dating apps, shines a light on the intricate dynamics faced by Successful Women in Relationships, and advocates for the delicate equilibrium between masculine and feminine energies. Alongside these insights, Lauren delves into the role of trauma and its impact on relationships. This episode offers invaluable relationship guidance, touching on themes of self-worth, commitment, and navigating rejection, all woven into fostering healthy relationships.Topics:- Career + Background: qualifications for a love and relationship coach, past dating experience, and love being 'worth the wait.' - Wanting Love: knowing when you're ready for love, dating apps, healing before seeking love- Finding Love: why we seek out the familiar in dating, relationship values, and assessing if you're ready for commitment.- Losing Love: fighting in relationships and if it can be fixed, dealing with breakups, ghosting, and grounding after heartbreak.Lauren Zoeller' Links:WebsiteInstagramTry the Superhuman Meditations app risk free → USE CODE 'PODCAST' FOR 6-WEEKS FREE• Hundreds of guided meditations powered by neuroscience for every mood + activity• 85% of users feel a shift after just 5 minutes of listening per day.Check out my fav Organifi products and get 20% off at Organifi.com/MIMIFollow Mimi on Instagram hereFollow Mimi on TikTok hereFollow MIMI Podcast on Instagram hereJoin us on YouTube hereWebsite → mimibouchard.comCan a conversation change your life? It can if you listen to it at the right time. Every week on this podcast, Superhuman founder Mimi Bouchard holds deep, inspiring conversations with some of the most motivating people in the world who share the secrets of their incredible success. Whether they've built lucrative businesses, created amazing relationships, improved their health, grown their wealth, or turned their lives around in really big (and even small) ways, you'll hear fresh takeaways that you can put in place to create the life of your dreams and become the very best version of yourself.New episodes every Monday + Wednesday. Don't forget to share your thoughts by rating and reviewing the show - your feedback helps us create more of the content you love!

It was such an honor to have Lauren Zoeller on the show! Lauren is a 7-figure entrepreneur, host of The Aligned Love podcast, speaker, and author.As the Founder of The Aligned Love Experience™, Lauren is an expert practitioner in reparenting, generational healing and Somatic Experiencing. Through her work, she created the proprietary Voice Activation Method™ that has been used to help thousands of men and women heal from past trauma and take ownership of their future.She is a certified dating & relationship coach and her insights have been featured on The Drew Barrymore Show, The NY Post, Business Insider, Medium, NBC News, Goal Cast, SHAPE magazine and other international media outlets. If you are interested in learning more about Lauren, follow the links below to learn more.The Aligned Love PodcastAligned Love Collective 

Lauren Zoeller, Certified Dating and Relationship Coach, talks about how you can become aligned in love, personally and in your relationships. The Dating Dish this week is: How many swipes does it take to find love online? The Dear Damona question is: Help! I have too many dating app messages and I'm getting burned out! Be sure to follow Lauren on Instagram @LaurenZoeller and learn more about her work by visiting: laurenzoeller.com/ Get Damona's free profile starter kit at DatesandMates.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode, we will learn about what it means to communicate with your nervous system through Somatic Experiencing Therapy with a licensed expert and a fellow relationship coach, Lauren Zoeller as she also tells us how it can heal traumas and help with your dating pattern. 

Episode Swap with the She Who Wins Podcast We all carry trauma with us, even if we don't realize it at the time. It's embedded in our identity, seeping into our everyday actions and responses whether we are aware of it or not. But simply acknowledging its presence isn't enough to truly confront it – unpacking and processing that baggage requires real commitment. This week, we are doing something a little different and listening in on a conversation from one of our favorite podcasts, She Who Wins, and airing an episode with host, Renee Bauer and her guest, Lauren Zoeller. Lauren Zoeller is a seven-figure entrepreneur, speaker, author, and host of “The Aligned Love Podcast”. As the Founder of The Aligned Love Experience, Lauren is an expert practitioner in reparenting, generational healing, and somatic experiencing. Through her work, she created the proprietary Voice Activation Method that has been used to help thousands of men and women heal from past trauma and take ownership of their future. In this episode, the two discuss the role that trauma plays in our lives and how we can turn it into an opportunity for growth rather than something that holds us back. Connect with Renee: The She Who Wins Podcast Renee's Website   Connect with Lauren: Lauren's Website Instagram: @laurenzoeller Tiktok: @coachlaurenzoeller   If you'd like quick tangible tips and practical corporate career advice to level up your authentic leadership, download the 10 simple “plays” to stop selling out and start standing out at https://bauthenticinc.mykajabi.com/freebie   To connect with Erin and/or Nicole, email: hello@bauthenticinc.com  If you like jammin' with us on the podcast, b sure to join us for more fun and inspiration!  Follow b Cause on Twitter (really it's mostly Nicole)   Follow Erin on LinkedIn or Instagram  Join the b Cause Podcast Facebook Group    Take our simple, fun and insightful"What's your workplace superhero name?”quiz  Unleash your Authentic Superpower with Erin's book,"You Do You (ish)" Check out our blog for more no-BS career advice Work with Us Or just buy some fun, authentic, kick-ars merch here DISCLAIMER: This episode is not explicit, though contains mild swearing that may be unsustainable for younger audiences. Tweetable Comments “Trauma is an overwhelming response to something that was too fast, too much or too soon for your body to properly process what's happening.” “When you're in this manic state of, I need to achieve, I need to get things done, what is your body telling you in that moment? Because when you can start learning that language, Then, you can start using the tools to regulate your system.” “Your truth is your birth right.” “It's important that we all learn to reparent ourselves. We all become self-healers because at some point we've had trauma.”  

Episode Swap with the She Who Wins Podcast We all carry trauma with us, even if we don't realize it at the time. It's embedded in our identity, seeping into our everyday actions and responses whether we are aware of it or not. But simply acknowledging its presence isn't enough to truly confront it – unpacking and processing that baggage requires real commitment. This week, we are doing something a little different and listening in on a conversation from one of our favorite podcasts, She Who Wins, and airing an episode with host, Renee Bauer and her guest, Lauren Zoeller. Lauren Zoeller is a seven-figure entrepreneur, speaker, author, and host of “The Aligned Love Podcast”. As the Founder of The Aligned Love Experience, Lauren is an expert practitioner in reparenting, generational healing, and somatic experiencing. Through her work, she created the proprietary Voice Activation Method that has been used to help thousands of men and women heal from past trauma and take ownership of their future. In this episode, the two discuss the role that trauma plays in our lives and how we can turn it into an opportunity for growth rather than something that holds us back. Connect with Renee: The She Who Wins Podcast Renee's Website   Connect with Lauren: Lauren's Website Instagram: @laurenzoeller Tiktok: @coachlaurenzoeller   If you'd like quick tangible tips and practical corporate career advice to level up your authentic leadership, download the 10 simple “plays” to stop selling out and start standing out at https://bauthenticinc.mykajabi.com/freebie   To connect with Erin and/or Nicole, email: hello@bauthenticinc.com  If you like jammin' with us on the podcast, b sure to join us for more fun and inspiration!  Follow b Cause on Twitter (really it's mostly Nicole)   Follow Erin on LinkedIn or Instagram  Join the b Cause Podcast Facebook Group    Take our simple, fun and insightful"What's your workplace superhero name?”quiz  Unleash your Authentic Superpower with Erin's book,"You Do You (ish)" Check out our blog for more no-BS career advice Work with Us Or just buy some fun, authentic, kick-ars merch here DISCLAIMER: This episode is not explicit, though contains mild swearing that may be unsustainable for younger audiences. Tweetable Comments “Trauma is an overwhelming response to something that was too fast, too much or too soon for your body to properly process what's happening.” “When you're in this manic state of, I need to achieve, I need to get things done, what is your body telling you in that moment? Because when you can start learning that language, Then, you can start using the tools to regulate your system.” “Your truth is your birth right.” “It's important that we all learn to reparent ourselves. We all become self-healers because at some point we've had trauma.”  

Welcome to today's ICYMI, where we kick off the week with a quick game-changing tip from one of our guests that you might have missed. Dating can be maximum fun, but it can also be stressful and exhausting if you've been on the hunt for “the one” for a while. Whether you're newly single or a seasoned app swiper, we gotchu, boo! We're throwing it back to the most important lesson we learned from relationship coach Lauren Zoeller: The non-negotiables you should establish going into any relationship, and an insightful exercise to help you figure out your needs in a relationship, and how to give them to yourself, first. Consider this the healthiest dating pep talk you'll hear, in 7 minutes. Treat yourself. Lauren is a CTA certified Love & Relationship Coach, motivational speaker and podcast host. She's the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a coaching program that teaches women how to attract love. She's been featured in international publications like Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Thrive Global, Money Inc., and more. Believe us when we say love is her language!Listen to our full episode with Lauren here.Tune in every Monday for an expert dose of life advice in under 10 minutes.For show notes and more adulting tips, visit: teachmehowtoadult.caSign up for our monthly adulting newsletter:teachmehowtoadult.ca/newsletter Follow us on the ‘gram:@teachmehowtoadultpodcast @yunggillianaire@cailynmichaanFollow Lauren:laurenzoeller.com@laurenzoeller

Today's guest episode is a powerful one!  Lauren Zoeller doesn't hold anything back in this interview.    Sneak peak: "When you start to get into somatic work and really understanding the nervous system and understanding the four survival responses, you can really see where your body is in a moment to moment basis and then say, oh, wait a second, I'm in a lot of activation right now. I can resource safety, that's the goal." - Lauren Zoeller   Lauren Zoeller shares her personal story of hitting rock bottom in her life, and then discovering Somatic Processing.  Inside this episode she explains that Somatic processing is a way to renegotiate trauma in the body.    In this episode, you will learn the following:  1. How can trauma be renegotiated in the body?  2. How can understanding the language of the nervous system help us recognize and source safety?  3. What is the fawn survival response, and how does it manifest in our relationships?   If this episode spoke to you, and you're ready to do the work to heal, I want to personally invite you to apply to the Empowered.Secure.Loved. Relationship Program.    Apply to the Empowered.Secure.Loved Program Here:    Click Here to Apply   Pssssst Podcast listeners get a special program offer: 10% off the program price!     EXCLUSIVE PROGRAM DISCOUNT CODE FOR PODCAST LISTENERS ONLY:    LGV10    Today, Lauren Zoeller leads men and women through healing work, helping them understand their nervous system and how to find safety within themselves.    Lauren Zoeller is a seven figure entrepreneur, host of the Aligned Love Podcast, speaker, author, and founder of the Aligned Love Experience. She is an expert practitioner in reparenting, generational healing, and somatic experiencing, and has been featured on The Drew Barrymore Show, The New York Post, Business Insider, and many other media outlets.   Connect with Lauren More:  laurenzoeller.com Instagram TikTok Facebook  

In today's episode with Ken Joslin, you'll hear how to hold space for your partner. As you listen today, Ken describes what holding space means and how his journey has led him to this topic. While doing the inner work, he discovered what his past meant for relationships and how to reframe that trauma. Ken gives you actionable steps in your relationship to deepen the intimacy between you and your partner. You will also hear tips to help both partners set boundaries.If you want to relisten to the episode with Lauren Zoeller, click here https://www.buzzsprout.com/1906299/11346669As always, we hope this episode helps you to build confidence, gain clarity, and create the community you deserve. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it on social media and tag Ken Joslin.

The first in person podcast for this year's season of Finding Your Competitive Edge features none other than 7-figure entrepreneur Lauren Zoeller!From being 30k in debt, to a cancer scare, to her relationship falling apart - all in ONE DAY, Lauren shares her journey and how getting real with yourself can truly heal and bring out the best version of you.As the Founder of The Aligned Love Experience, Lauren is an expert practitioner in reparenting, generational healing, & Somatic Experiencing. Through her work, she created the proprietary Voice Activation Method that has been used to help thousands of men & women heal from past trauma and take ownership of their future.“I truly believe that the most influential people in the world are the ones who are the most vulnerable…the more that you can take it piece by piece…the better it can be.” - Lauren Zoeller

Have you heard of somatic therapy? Lauren redefines how unresolved trauma is stored in our bodies with Lauren Zoeller. To kick off this interview, Lauren defines what somatic experiencing is and examples of somatic tools. Furthermore, she speaks about how to identify an unresolved trauma and how attachment theory relates to finding deeper connections with others. She offers two tools to work through feelings and sensations at home, as well as how to not “scare anyone away” by being vulnerable. Finally, she discusses her three-step process to emotional healing and ways you can work through the three-step process. Let's discuss the nuances of dating and relationships! Tune in! MAJOR DISCOUNT FOR JEN.HEALTH. Sign up now to get 57% off for life! You will have access to 11 different plans with 2-3 phases and short videos daily, monthly check-ins with DocJen with anatomy breakdowns, and a growing community. Sign up right now and start a free week. See what it feels like to commit for a week! Click here to join Jen.Health! What You Will Learn In This Interview with Lauren Zoeller 4:00 - What is Somatic therapy and experiencing? 4:53 - What are examples of somatic tools 6:25 - How do you identify if you have a trauma that needs to be worked through? 11:43 - Attachment Theory: Can working through trauma help you transition to a different “attachment” 13:53 - 2 at-home tools for somatic work 19:00 - How to not “scare someone away” 21:35 - How to repeatedly be vulnerable when dates go wrong 24:57 - How do you know when you're ready to date again after a traumatic experience? 26:54 - Can you work on healing in partnership? 27:58 - Three-step process to somatic healing 30:53 - How to differentiate between red flags and second chances! 32:58 - The Align Love Experience To learn more about Lauren Zoeller and view full show notes, please visit the full website here: https://www.docjenfit.com/podcast/episode279/ Thank you so much for checking out this episode of The Optimal Body Podcast. If you haven't done so already, please take a minute to subscribe and leave a quick rating and review of the show! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/tobpodcast/message

Barton and Dr. Kelly sit down for a spirited discussion about Health, Addiction, David Goggins, and how we can find positive ways to focus our energies to better ourselves.  He talks about extreme athletes like David Goggins and what to watch out for with following him or other Elite Athletes.  Dr. Robb will join Ed Mylett, John Maxwell, and others in the CREATE Conference in Atlanta, GA from January 26 - January 28th.  For more information, visit:  http://www.robbkelly.comFor more info on the Endure Tour coming to Austin, TX, with David Goggins, Cameron Hanes, Nick Bare, Phil Daru, Nate Boyer, Mitch Royer, and Barton Bryan, visit: http://www.enduretour.comBackground on. Dr. Robb Kelly:Dr. Robb Kelly, PhD is a sought-after recovery expert who believes in treating thecauses of addiction and not the symptoms. Dr. Kelly has appeared on such shows asThe Doctors, Eye Opener, Good Morning Texas, and Kens5 morning news.  A frequentcontributor to radio and print interviews including The Jim Bohannon show, Miracles inRecovery, USA Today, and participated in McLean Hospital's (Harvard Medical School)study on the stigma associated with mental illness. Dr. Kelly hosted Sober Celebs showon KLIF radio in Dallas, and currently hosts the Breaking Through Addiction podcastfeaturing special guest discussing a variety of mental health issues.Dr. Kelly created Let's Get Back to 98% Recovery DVDs used in prisons and recoverytreatment centers throughout the US. He has lectured on addiction and trauma at high-profile universities, national conferences, treatment facilities, public schools, churches,business organizations and hospitals. Dr Kelly is currently the CEO of the Robb KellyRecovery Group, an addiction and mental illness recovery coaching company hecreated based on extensive research and behaviour studies that he conducted over thepast 20 years. Dr. Kelly shares his personal highs and lows as he struggled andovercame crippling alcoholism in the November 2019 release of the book “Daddy,Daddy Please Stop Drinking”.Professional Credentials:PhD, Psychology, Trinity College/Oxford University, October 13, 1984PhD, Psychology (Behavioral Science concentration), University of Southampton.Nationally Certified Recovery Coach (NCRC 1)Somatic Experience Practitioner CertificationCertified Life CoachCertified Neuro-Linguistic Programming PractitionerCertified International InterventionistCertified Brain Spotting PractitionerPublished author, professional speaker, and consultantrobb@robbkelly.comwww.robbkelly.comwww.facebook.com/drrobbkellytwitter.com/RobbKellyGrouplinkedin.com/in/dr-robb-kelly-07718133https://www.instagram.com/robbkellyrecoverygroup/Check out more info about the Endure Tour coming to Austin, TX on March 29th: https://www.enduretour.comBarton on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/bartonguybryan/Podcast Website is: https://www.podpage.com/the-mindset-forge-podcast/Join the Mindset Forge Premium membership for $3 / month (Donor Level) or $150 / month for Coaching: https://themindsetforge.supercast.com

A cosmic-focused convo that is your beginners guide to all things Astrology and Feng Shui. Step into the concepts behind what astrology truly is and the reasonings behind society's obsession with the stars. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Lesley and Brad are going on tour! Astrology signs don't define your behaviors.The perception of astrology in society.The difference between Feng Shui and astrologyHow the energies and stars can make senseWhat in your life are you becoming desensitized to? Episode References/Links:Join Brad and LL on tourThe Source Book by Dr. Tara SwartKate Wind WebsiteMom & Me Astrology Podcast  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.Be It Till You See It Podcast SurveyUse this link to get your Toe Sox!ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the cosmic convo I have with Kate Wind in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now, go back and then listen to that one and then come back and join us. Okay, I really loved this interview. I just have to say this before we get into anything else because I was like, I really want to have her on but I don't want her, I don't want it to be like to woo and people like freak out. But like, I really felt like it. It made a lot of sense. If you haven't listened to it, you should like listen to it. Because it's a it's a precursor. It's definitely like, a pre 101 you know, and (Brad: Yeah) it makes me feel like I understand a few things. I started listening to her podcast with her mom. And yeah, I feel like I actually know some of the words. I'm still learning things. And it's all very interesting. It's all very fun. So anyways, Brad just got back from Philly. And he was visiting his grandfather and family for the holidays. I don't even know the last time I spent Thanksgiving with them, Babe, but you got to spend Thanksgiving with them.Brad Crowell  Yeah, before we go on there, I had a comment about the conversation as well. You know, I'm I've never been a big fan of astronomy. Just kidding. Astronomy is the study of the stars. Astrology has always been weird. I always thought it was like, I don't know, just kind of that thing that you read in the newspaper that tells you that the world's coming to an end every single week. And I didn't know anything about Feng Shui either. And this was a really enlightening conversation for me because I I learned some of the concepts behind what astrology you know is and why there are charts and all this stuff. And I thought it was interesting to hear that the idea that it's like, I mean, she's got a psychology degree. (Lesley: Yeah) Right. It's this isn't like she just like read a couple books and became like a fairy who reads a crystal ball. Because in my head that's what other movies are with this kind of thing. The conversation wasn't like that at all it was it was really grounded. I thought so. I really enjoyed that. (Lesley: Good. Well ...) Anyway, my my my trip back home was really good. My grandfather is getting old and I really wanted to spend some time with him when it was possible to do that. So taking two weeks out of our crazy life was really important to me.Lesley Logan  Yeah, and you know, we don't really do a lot for Thanksgiving around here anyway, so I think it was really good that you got to spend Thanksgiving. I'm not gonna be, I'm be really honest like because Claire came to visit me and that was so exciting. But I like nothing brought me more joy then going, "I don't have to cook any thing."Brad Crowell  Except for bacon.Lesley Logan  I'm not even do it. I didn't even do that. I'm like I ordered in. I got to be by myself until my family like I mean like it was glorious. I love it. Um I am also on my way to Dallas (Brad: Oh yeah.) for it's coming becoming an annual event. (Brad: Yeah) Erika Quest and I are doing a WeLL weekend, well it's our second WeLL weekend. But it's definitely ...Brad Crowell  You've been down there three times but (Lesley: Yeah) this is the second, (Lesley: Yeah, this is ...) December.Lesley Logan  With Erika Quest. (Brad: Yeah) And it's just, it's gonna be a lot of fun. I really enjoyed working with her, we're gonna do things like that, if you don't know who Erika Quest is, you gonna listen to her episode. It's probably in the teens. And, and when we come back, we quickly get ourselves situated, close the house up for the winter and hit the road (Brad: Yeah) where it's our first stop being in Dallas. Well, one of the first class we're gonna do, so I'll be back in Dallas teaching some workouts, and then Houston and then we're going to spend a night in Memphis and then a day in Nashville, sometime in Atlanta with our friend Joel. Well, actually be in Nashville with our friend Lauren Zoeller. You've heard her episode. (Brad: Yes ...) And it's me so much fun ...Brad Crowell  It's gonna be an incredible tour. (Lesley: Yeah. And the Greensboro.) Yeah, we're gonna be doing multiple classes in a few cities. But I think we have. Yeah, Dallas, Houston, Nashville, just outside of Atlanta, Greensboro, North Carolina, (Lesley: Cleveland) Cleveland, Ohio and then St. Louis. (Lesley: Yeah. So so fun.) So seven stops.Lesley Logan  Seven stops. (Brad: Yeah) Yeah. And so anyways, if you are wanting to join any of those cities sound like something fun. You want to work out with me onlinepilates.classes.com/tour is our third official tour.Brad Crowell  Yeah. And if you're in the Philly area and you want to hang we're going to like get together for coffee. You know, in the Philadelphia just north of Philadelphia. SoLesley Logan  Yeah. And that and it's at night time that coffee might be a drink and and then ... (Brad: It might be a hot toddy.) And then Denver, yes loves of course, we're going to hang out and have lunch for you guys.Brad Crowell  Yeah. Denver we're gonna have lunch on our drive thru.Lesley Logan  We have a wedding to be at (Brad: Yeah) on December 31. So this tour is hot like hit it hard before the holiday. (Brad: Yeah) A couple days a family, get our ... back home. Yeah. So super, I'm just so excited that people love this tour so much that we keep doing it because it really is fun. And I just saw the art for the tour. And I can't wait to see what the merch is because we all need a tour shirt. (Brad: Yeah, you do.) We all do. (Brad: Yeah, you do.) Now ...Brad Crowell  Anyway, onlinepilatesclasses.com/tour.Lesley Logan  Yes. Okay. So instead of a question this week, we have a bold moment, right, Brad?Brad Crowell  Yeah, we totally do. It's exciting. We love hearing from y'all. So if you ever have any bold moments, you know, we are very excited to share with your permission, of course. SoLesley Logan  I got permission from Alison. She's an Agency member of ours. And she wrote lots of stuff on my mind this week. But there's a channel we have an Agency by the way, it's called Blow My Mind. "First, LL's podcast episode on fall routines and mindset helped me realize that for as long as I can remember, I have not wanted to do anything from roughly October to December. And yet also for pretty much my whole life, I have resisted that because I believe I should push on no matter what. And this October has been no exception. So as I look ahead to November and my business goals, I'm considering what kind of actions will cultivate a sense of nurturing rather than effort. Also, I started reading The Source recommended in that podcast episode. And the first journal exercise helped me realize how disconnected I feel from pretty much everybody since moving. Even though I'm still in touch with wonderful people from Austin and I love my partner's family. I still feel alone. This is definitely something to journal more about." So I loved this moment because it's all inspired from the pod. (Brad: Yeah) And and that's the whole point of this whole podcast is to help people, help you listening, understand yourself more and (Brad: Yeah) figure out how you can be it till you see it and like you cannot be it till you see it if you're pushing through when your body is saying it slowed the fuck down. So and I have, I have been watching what Alison's been doing. And all of her goals have been things to help set her up for a Q1 where she can go off and hit the ground running so she's not doing nothing, but she's not pushing. She's actually like it's it feels a little bit more like polling like what is what do I need to do over here. So thank you, Alison, for letting us share this and also for sharing it with us because it y'all podcast is so much fun. I love doing it. I love the interviews I get to do. It's like a really fun thing. But hearing how it affects you makes it like is like the why behind doing it. Like it's the fuel for it all. So thank you for sharing this and if you want to share yours, you can DM us at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. You can send it into the team, any place that you want to do that and will help us share it with other people.Brad Crowell  Yeah, we want to celebrate your bold moment. (Lesley: Yes) So awesome. Okay, now let's talk about Kate Wind. As a second generation Astrologer, Tarot reader and Feng Shui consultant. Kate has been raised around the language of the stars. But it wasn't until after she pursued her degree in psychology, that she got fed up with the corporate life and doing a decade in the corporate life, that it started that she started to recognize the cycles of astrology in her own life and circle back around starting her own business. So she got out of the corporate world and started her own astrology business. She now works to bring these tools to people in a digestible manner. Kate works with one-on-one clients with both astrology and Feng Shui and reads Tarot for events and is a co host of the podcast called Mom & Me Astrology.Lesley Logan  Yeah, it's a fun podcast. Can you just say how you read, reader before? Can you just say that again? I just want to hear how you said it.Brad Crowell  I don't have any idea (Lesley: Oh, okay.) what she talking about.Lesley Logan  At the top you said Tarot reader and I just thought that was really special. It's like tarjay, it's just Tarot. (Lesley laughs) (Brad: Oh) Yeah, you say it Tarot. And I was like, (Brad: Tarot reader) that is such a beautiful way of saying it and also a big (Brad: tarjay) a big light. Brad does not do I don't think he's ever had a Tarot reading before.Brad Crowell  I've definitely not had a Tarot reading. (Lesley laughs)Lesley Logan  I would have stopped you if you said (Brad laughs) Tarot. Okay, so this is a really fun conversation. This was really, I really wanted to have her on talking about this because I find what she does really interesting. I also it sounds like I've I've I know other astrologers and I haven't brought them I specifically brought her on because I love the way that she and her mom, look and use astrology as she mentioned, it's like, like can be like a therapy thing. And so I just find that to be really cool. Like, back during the US election, they had a whole episode on astrology and the election. And so they, they use it in an applicable sense as opposed to like a psychic sense. And I think that that's really unique. So one of the (Brad: Yeah) things that I loved, and this is, this is like super key as like your signs don't define your behaviors. So I say this, I'll just keep going with like, one of the things she talked about was like, talking about how your how you shouldn't use your sun sign as an excuse for behaviors. She like she, have you ever had this, like, "Oh, I'm a Virgo. So that's just who I am." Like, anytime you say (Brad: Totally) it's just how I am, and then you refer it to your sign. That's not how astrology was supposed to be used, or is actually used. It just just as much as like, one of my strength is WOO. And I ... I stayed in a relationship too long, because I was trying to win this person over. It doesn't mean like, I constantly put myself as a doormat because I'm trying to win others over. That would be like, I have choice there. I have I know who I know this about myself. (Brad: Yeah) And I know that I can do that. So I put boundaries in place. And so ...Brad Crowell  Well, we I mean, it's the same like we talk about strengths all the time, especially Strengths Finders, you heard us talk about that a lot. Every strength has a flip side, you can be empathetic, and it can be a benefit to you. That same empathy can be an anchor (Lesley: Yeah) for you, you know (Lesley: Yeah) on you. And so I think that in the same way, you know, why what how Astrology can define a possible character trait of yours, that character trait doesn't have to be negative.Lesley Logan  Right. Well, and also, it doesn't just go back to it's not an excuse for poor behavior, (Brad: Right) period. (Brad: Yeah) End of story. You don't get to be like, like a dick about something go that's just my like sun sign. Like, because (Brad: Yeah, or...) I'm a Taurus, I blow up at people. No, you have fire in you. But that doesn't exclude you, excuse you for like, blowing up on people just because you're upset.Brad Crowell  Or you're talking about being a doormat, you know, you don't necessarily like you could be prescribing yourself a negative situation, thinking that this is just the way it is because I'm X Y Z, you know, (Lesley: Yeah) because I'm a Cancer. You knowLesley Logan  Well, I mean, I lose things all the time. And yes, I am an Aquarius. And I put things in different places. That being said, I don't get to every time I lose something of ours and go, "Let's kind of have an Aquarius deal with it." Like no. (Brad: Right) Is he some people like you, I put things away on purpose, so that that are yours anyways. You know, so anyways, just to like sum that up, I really love that she brought this up, because I really do think a lot of times, we can use some qualities about ourselves or characteristics about ourselves that are unbecoming. And go, well, that's just who I am based on this sign ...Brad Crowell  And write it off, and then expect everyone to just be like, okay with it.Lesley Logan  And guess what, you know, you still are responsible for the actions that you take.Brad Crowell  Yeah, totally. Yeah, you know, one thing, actually, I have a couple things. You know, like she said, you ask her how do people take you know perceive, perceive you when you explain to them what you do. And she said, people either have two reactions, they are really excited about it, or they avoid it. Because they don't really understand it, and I don't know what to do. And we went out to dinner with her and her partner. And like, and I think I avoided it. You know, I wasn't like ...Lesley Logan  Oh you did. I was like, "Wait, tell me more."Brad Crowell  Yeah ... It just kind of got like, kind of made me glassy eyed where I was like, I don't know what that means. Okay, moving right along. Right. And it was a you know, you know, that said, with that in mind. I, it was a an awesome dinner. We had an amazing time and the conversation was fantastic. But what I didn't understand at the time until the interview that you just had was that there is a difference ... while they go hand in hand, there's a difference between astrology and Feng Shui. (Lesley: Oh, yeah.) And I didn't know that. I mean, I just heard a Feng Shui too, but like I don't actually know anything about Feng Shui. I just knew that like, it's a thing and people like you know, change ...Lesley Logan  My mom is going to call you up because my mom was so big on Feng Shui. She watches us on YouTube, shout out to mom, and she is going to teach you all the things and you're ended up with a crystal somewhere.Brad Crowell  I mean, I'm not opposed to that. But my point is I didn't know that there was a difference. Just kind of lumped it all into whatever. And I thought, you know, this conversation was still a merge of the two and I was trying to understand like, what's what and what's the other but I was, I was definitely drawn to the actionable steps that are possible with Feng Shui. I still don't really understand all the things with astrology. But I thought, I thought with the idea of like, there's a, you know, there's a clear timestamp in space and time when you were born. Okay, no problem. And when you were born, planets and things were in a specific space, and like they were, they were, where they were when you were born. Okay, totally get that. So I thought that was interesting. But then from there, there wasn't too much like, I didn't really understand action steps that could be taken from that. And then the conversation shifted over to Feng Shui where I did, where there was a lot of actionable steps. And I thought, okay, cool. So I was kind of learning about the practicality of Feng Shui, and how you can be setting yourself up for failure without even realizing it simply based on your environment. (Lesley: Yeah, well, I mean, and I think ...) Or you can be setting yourself up for success in that same environment.Lesley Logan  Yeah, I think like, that's the like, there's, and some people might even be doing some Feng Shui things not even knowing about it, because (Brad: Yeah) it's doesn't, when you actually look at it, it's it kind of as some of it is a little more common sense. Like, I wouldn't have known that the the money like that the girl's picture was in the wrong corner. But the girls had our picture that she talked about the back is turned towards her (Brad: Right) and your your clients are women, and they're not buying for you, like put that picture away. Right. Like ...Brad Crowell  Yeah, the most practical application of Feng Shui, from my experience growing up is you laugh about it, but the lipstick on the mirror in the bathroom in the morning of like, you got this, right, the positive messaging of like, you're a good person. And like the concept of a mantra, you wake up and you have this thing that you repeat to yourself, and you start the day, the day is amazing. And, you know, and I never really thought that there's anything weird about any of that, because I understand the story we tell ourselves is how we're going to experience the day. Right? So if I'm willing to embrace that idea, why would I not be willing to embrace these ideas of like, the way you've positioned the room can actually have an effect on your mindset.Lesley Logan  Well, and so I love that you brought that up. Because when you as you're talking earlier, and you're like, I didn't know about this, the I didn't put it together with the stars. Y'all you're most many people who might be like a little bit like, "I don't know about astrology. I don't know about this Feng Shui stuff. I don't know about this." But then you go to Machu Picchu or you go to the the pyramids, or you go to the temples of Cambodia (Brad: Temples of Angkor with us. Yeah.) How do you think these things got created and exactly where they are? Okay. I think we talked about this in, you know, when we were in Cambodia, some of these temples were built at the exact same time as other things halfway across the world were being built. And like, the only thing I can think of is like, well, what was going on at that time? Because there wasn't cell phones, there wasn't email, there wasn't someone chartering a boat, and like telling people this we're building. It's po... it had to been what was going on in the stars, because they could you know what I mean, like, there's just these energies things. So I, I know, it can sound like triple woo, when you talk about energies and stars and all and the Feng Shui. But some of it just makes a lot of sense.Brad Crowell  Yeah. And I thought that there was, I was, you know, what, also, I thought was really interesting was, she grew up in this environment, or, you know, parents are both astrologers, and her, she was fielding phone calls of like, you know, my triple Moon is jumping backflips over the rainbows of Mars, you know, like, as a 10 year old, and I don't, I don't speak that language. So I didn't really understand. And I was kind of making fun of it right there. And I hope she doesn't give me too much shit for that. But, you know, that's kind of what it sounds like, to me. And I'm like, "Ah, I don't really get it." But I also don't, you know, like, when she started to get nerdy about it, she was like, here's the relationship of the planets and the stars and the things and how they affect each other. And then when the, you know, as the Earth rotates, and we move around the sun, and all this stuff, and the position that we are in that, you know, it affects things and I was like, "Oh, get it, got it. Got that. That's kind of cool." You know, and her psychology degree, when she was looking like at her own life, experiencing her corporate life that she was living, you know, having speaking the language that she grew up with, and then applying the, you know, her knowledge from going to school, you know, allows her a really interesting get a bridge, like she speaks a language that I could connect with, because, you know, I can relate more to psychology that I can't do astrology, and she is connecting the dots there and I thought that was really helpful for me really revealing.Lesley Logan  Yeah, yeah. Well, basically, Kate, we love you and the way that you look at these things because it's approachable (Brad: Yeah) and easily to understand. And that's why I'd have her on. Brad Crowell  All right, so finally, let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted items can we take away from your conversation with Kate Wind?Lesley Logan  Yeah, so she had one kind of one BE IT action. I mean, I really love this because it's, you should be doing this annually, if not more often, but she says, take a look at your home. What is your home saying? And if your home is an apartment, or ...Brad Crowell  Yeah. There's a little more on the Feng Shui than the astrology side.Lesley Logan  Yeah, so look at the artwork, look at the pictures, are they current, any dead trees or plants, anything broken, remove the dead energy.Brad Crowell  Clutter. I mean, I'm, I'm such a culprit of this where like, things just build up on my desk behind, you know, my zoom camera. And then all of a sudden, I turn around, and it's been like, a month since I've moved things around on my desk. And it's just a pile of stuff. You know.Lesley Logan  Yeah. And then she and this is like, also, I thought this was a really actionable thing. She says, take note of where you walk around and curse. Where are you spilling your four letter words? Because I think sometimes people go, "Oh, it's fine. No, my plants are fine, or actually I don't have a lot of things. I'm a very clean, like, I have like a clean look." Or whatever you call that minimalist look. And it's like, okay, but then are you constantly like tripping on a table? Or are you like, are you avoiding like, do you even sit in your living room, like, what go in and do an inventory around how you use your house, and if it is actually bringing you any joy? Or like what the energy is (Brad: Yeah) because, you know, we do move things around a lot. Because we that's how we are. And that's kind of how it but it's really easy. Like I'm looking over at this like shelf and over here. And I don't even know why those things are on there. And if we chose for them to be on there, and maybe we should move those things around. Because maybe like, maybe they belong to somewhere else.Brad Crowell  These are my decorating skills, Babe.Lesley Logan  Yeah. I clearly, you know, take over on that. But anyways, I thought this is really cool. And I'm wondering, Brad, if there's if there's anything in your spaces that you're wanting to like, take a look at.Brad Crowell  So I'm not going to answer that question. No, I'm just kidding. Well, I thought I really connected to the idea of dead trees and plants. Because as you all know, I've been really excited about cactuses. And I never gave a shit about that before, for the first time in my life, like I actually walk around and water them and check on them and make sure that they're, you know, doing well. And, and like talk to them, which is weird, but I do. And, you know, so the I certainly wouldn't want a you know, if something has died. You don't leave it there. Seems pretty straightforward to me. But maybe you do because it's not important to you. But what I think the idea is, whether you think it's important to you or not, it is affecting you. Right? Whether you realize it or not, it is affecting you. Right. And you almost become I become desensitized to it. Until there is a boiling point. I remember I was thinking about this when I was listening to the interview. I remember at my old job, I had a desk and the desk was in a room with other people. And you know, unsurprisingly, my desk started to get clutter, right. And I didn't realize it but you know. And then over a period of time, it was clutter and clutter, clutter. And then I had like an epically bad day, like so bad that I wanted to throw my laptop, break things, scream, yell, and all this stuff. And I couldn't do any of that. But I literally, I just took my arms and I just went flew and I switched everything off my desk on the floor. And everyone in the office was like, "What just happened?" Right. And I was because I just needed space, I needed ... you know, all of it was there and ... And I just remember throughout basically throwing stuff against the wall, right? And and I don't know why, but it was very relieving for me. It was really weird for everyone else in the room. I created a lot of tension in that public outburst that I didn't scream and yell. But suddenly my desk was clean and it allowed me to go like ... right, so I didn't even realize all of that clutter was affecting me. But it was.Lesley Logan  Oh, it's like that having the tabs open on your computer. (Brad: Same thing.) It's the same thing. It's got things running in the background. And so I like that I um, I'm actually super excited because we're gonna be back in time for our New Year's day anniversary like (Brad: Yeah) and our thing that we have, we try to do every year at New Year's and what I'm hoping happens is we redo the closets. (Brad: Yeah) It's a little hard to do every single room in the house in one day but I believe in us and the closets and the kitchen drawers I think. So follow up with us y'all on January 2nd and ask us (Brad: How we did?) how we did on removing room like moving some energies and also where all cuz I definitely curse in the closet because I can't find things (Brad: Sure) and they're missing. (Brad: Sure) And I then I buy them again, because I forgot that I already own them or something similar. Like, "Why do I have four hot pink pair of pants?" Oh, because I couldn't find the other three. And I was like, "Oh, look at these. I already have that." So anyways, I thought this was really special. Let us know how this conversation worked for you. What parts of it were intriguing, which parts were like, oh, and it makes you understand, which part you're like, not into that. I'm happy to hear and also what you're going to remove or move around in your place like how are you doing? (Brad: Yeah) Take a picture or show it, like share you got any create a reel, create a reel of you like change the energy in your house. (Brad: Yeah, that's a great idea.) And tag ... (Brad: Tag us. Tag Kate.) And tag the @be_it_pod, tag Kate. She'll love it. (Brad: Yeah) And also take a listen, if this was really interesting to you, because I would love to have her back. But you don't have to wait for that you can actually go to Mom & Me Astrology and listen to their podcast. They have an episode every week, and I find them all very fascinating. So anyways, I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell  And, I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan  Thank you so much for joining us today. We are so so grateful to have you here and so until next time, Be It Till You See It.Brad Crowell  Bye for now.Lesley Logan  Be It Till You See It is a production of Bloom Podcast Network. Brad Crowell   It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan. And me Brad Crowell. Our associate producer is Amanda Frattarelli. Lesley Logan   Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.  Brad Crowell  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianranco Cioffi.  Lesley Logan  Special thanks to our designer Mesh Herico for creating all of our visuals, (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week, so you can.Brad Crowell  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each episode, so you can find it on our website. And finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on timeTranscribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Trauma is a fact of life; everyone everywhere has it. Traumatic experiences may not be our fault, but healing from them is our responsibility. Getting to the root cause of “what happened to you,” instead of thinking “what's wrong with you,” is essential to your healing. Doing the inner work requires your full commitment in order to take ownership of your future.In 2018, Lauren Zoeller was running a successful business, had a partner she adored and to anyone on the outside looking in, life was pretty perfect. But three phone calls brought her to her rock bottom. The first phone call was from her boyfriend's mother, telling her he was going back to rehab for the sixth time that year. The second phone call was from her  CPA who said he was dropping her as a client because her business was $30,000 in the red and he saw “no hope” for her future. The third phone call was from her doctor telling her that test results came back showing potential cancer. That day Lauren made a choice to face the healing she was ignoring and found somatic therapy to be the most successful healing modality. The results were better, faster and created permanent change than traditional therapy, meditation, coaching and other healing modalities. This work created a ripple effect and transformed every area of her life. She then went from $30,000 in the red in her business to generating $30,000 a month in her business. Lauren Zoeller is the founder of The Aligned Love Experience, and an expert in reparenting, generational healing and somatic experiencing. In this Limitless Podcast episode, she tells us how she turned her chaos into an opportunity to rise up and fulfill her mission: to help people find alignment, fulfillment and clarity in their relationships with themselves and with others.IN THIS LIMITLESS PODCAST EPISODE YOU WILL LEARNHow somatic experiencing can lead to breakthroughs of healing past traumas.How to view struggles as opportunities to grow, push forward and fulfill your purpose.The importance of doing the inner work in order to improve the relationships you attract and the life you want to lead.Ask Frankly Co. your most pressing business questions and get answers now: https://forms.gle/scCv8UD6g4UhjPZ59More Frankly Co. resources: https://franklyco.com/resources/Visit Lauren's website: https://www.laurenzoeller.com/Follow Lauren on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurenzoeller/?hl=enFollow Lauren on Twitter: https://twitter.com/laurenzoeller

Is there a secret to being confident? Is there a way to speak up without being a natural extrovert? Elle Russ argues yes! Listen in for Brad and Lesley's recap on building and protecting your confidence with a few tips and tricks weaved throughout.  If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Retreat updatesWhat is confidence? Why you have to take action Why direct communication and boundaries are a package deal How to protect and build your confidenceStart small to Identify and change the pattern What is the stumbling block to confidence? Episode References/Links:Retreat Info If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.Be It Till You See It Podcast SurveyUse this link to get your Toe Sox!ResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the confident convo I had with Elle Ross in our last episode. (Brad: It was that.) It was so confident. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now, go back and listen to that one and then come back and join us. You have to listen to that one. I don't care what order you do your shit in but like ...Brad Crowell  That's a great, amazing, like hard to break down into one thing to talk about episode because there was so much good stuff.Lesley Logan  So much good stuff. I mean, like I sometimes I was just like, I'm just gonna let her go. Because like, I'm just like, I'm getting confident, just listening to her. (Brad: Yeah.) So I'm just ... (Brad: It was, it was exciting.) I'm just gonna, like live off that those words. So anyways, I'm really excited about this interview. I've been wanting to have her on since before we started the pod. I heard her somewhere else. And like I was like, "This girl has to be on." And I actually heard her talking about something else that she does with paleo stuff and, and we ended up just chatting back and forth. I was like, "Okay, you're talking about confidence. Like, you're just going to do that." So anyway, I'm so glad we waited and we got her on and this time and Brad, we're in this interesting, like not a lull. But it's like a, it's like a, well, it's an in between what do you call that? (Brad: The middle.) The middle. (Brad: The messy middle.) We are in the middle. We've literally just sent everyone out of our house. (Brad: Oh, yeah.) After like being we were in Chicago. It was a freaking blast if we told you. And then we came in, cleaned everything up again. And then like people came in. And then it was a whirlwind of people, people getting photos ...Brad Crowell  Because we had the Pilates retreat, or sorry, we had a business retreat at our house in Vegas. (Lesley: Yeah.) So we're in Chicago for POT. And then we hosted an event here. And now we are prepping to leave for Cambodia.Lesley Logan  Yeah, so and while we're prepping, we've got so many people coming to town for another Pilates situation with PMA. And it's like, I think we're gonna have more coffee dates than we've ever had in our entire lives. I'm (Brad: Yeah) but we're prepping for Cambodia and I'm really excited. And if you are like, "I missed the business retreat." You frickin did. You just did. No, I mean, we missed you too. But when is the next one and there is not one on the books for 2023. Because actually, a really a lot of amazing other stuff going on. And there's only so many weeks in the year and one of those should be a vacation for me and Brad. So (Brad: It's true.) so you can get on the waitlist for Profitable Pilates business retreats we'll probably bring them back in 2024. And if you're like, "That's too far away, guys." Well, that's what Agency is for.Brad Crowell  Right. So if you want to get on the waitlist to join us in person in Vegas, go to profitablepilates.com/retreats plural, retreats. And if you are interested in more about Agency and working with us before then just go to profitablepilates.com/agencyLesley Logan  Yeah. You don't have to wait till 2024 to get the hands in on your business. (Brad: That's true.) Even if you're like, "I love in person." That's fine. (Brad: We love in person too.) We do too, but I don't want you to wait two years to get you know, you're like we can totally make magic happen online before you get in person and we can do twice as much when you're here. (Brad: Yes.) All right. Well, now we had an audience re... an audience question to respond to, I think.Brad Crowell  Yeah, well, this one was a collection of questions when we were in Chicagoland with Pilates on tour. (Lesley: Why is it called Chicagoland?) Because it's not Chicago proper, (Lesley: Yeah) outside of Chicago. We, it was so exciting, because I thought everybody knew that we go to Cambodia. (Lesley: No) You know, like, we talked about it so much, so, so often. And people were like, so fired up to hear about it. And they were really excited about the idea of going there and they were getting themselves on the waitlist. And they were asking because obviously we're leaving in less than a month now to go to Cambodia with our first group post COVID. And we're really excited about that. But if you wanted to join us oh sorry, the question is, how often do we go?Lesley Logan  Yeah, So the reality is we've always wanted to go twice a year for retreats. (Brad: Yeah.) But given that people are still getting into the swing of traveling in this new normal that we're in, we only have one this year. And we're only planning one next year.Brad Crowell  That's right. (Lesley: Yeah.) By the way, if you have noticed where we're trying to reduce things.Lesley Logan  Yeah. Do you see how we're doing that? We're being it till we see it on this reduction policy over here. And it's not because we don't love it. Well, Brad, and I will probably know ... (Brad: It's my favorite thing.) Yeah, it's our will, we're definitely gonna go because we got a couple trips to Korea. That's happening and definitely ...Brad Crowell  ... we're gonna go down. Yes.Lesley Logan  Yeah. I feel like but Lesley, that made us could do another retreat. Yes, we could pack that in. (Brad: We could.) But that's, that's not we're doing anymore. And so if we're doing one next year, so I highly recommend that you get on the waitlist for that, well announced the dates probably, probably towards the end of this year, we'll have it solidify. We're just waiting on a few dates from some other events that we've got to make sure that we're at and ...Brad Crowell  Yeah, but it's gonna be in the fall, like September, October, somewhere in there and 2023. (Lesley: Yeah.) You know, (Lesley: Yeah.) by the way, if you're like, "What the hell I want to go right now?" (Lesley: You can.) You can join us. We still have room on the one that's happening in starting on October 30, 2022. But if you know that's not going to work for you, and you want to join us next year. Get yourself on the waitlist, go to lesleylogan.co/retreats. And that's plural. (Lesley: Yes. It's plural.) It's lesleylogan.co/retreats. (Lesley: We like the s s around here.) Yeah. (Lesley: And so ...) Singular takes you to the landing page for this year's retreat.Lesley Logan  Plural takes you to a waitlist. So you can get ... yeah. And so I just hope you come. I know that it's, here's the thing, but I know. I know that it's a big deal for you to plan a trip that crosses the ocean. And I know how easy it is say, I'll do next time because you think that next time will be easier than this time, or the next next time will be easier than this time. You are never going to feel ready. (Brad: No.) Ready is a lie.Brad Crowell  It's like having kids.Lesley Logan  Well, and we don't know that. But every person we know who has a kid, they're like ... (Brad: They're like buying a house.) You're never ready. Yeah. So I, so what I would just say is like, make make the plans, put it in there, put it in your calendar, or put like put it on your list of things you want to do in 2023. And like, look for ways to make that happen. (Brad: Yeah.) Because you will never ever regret going we did a retreat in March of 2020. And every person who came with all the uncertainty that there was, there was like, couldn't be more uncertainty then because we're like, "What's going on? I don't know." And we all went none of them regretted it. (Brad: No.) They all still talk to each other since then. (Brad: Yeah.) They still talk to each other. We've had ones that had babies since then. All of us have has happened and they're so glad they went when they did. (Brad: Yeah.) And so I'm just saying you should be there. Instead of ...Brad Crowell  You should be there. Yes. Well anyway, that is exciting. We love talking about Cambodia and I know that you know that diehard listeners if you're a first timer. Welcome to our world. (Lesley: Hello. I'm Lesley Logan.) And I'm Brad.Lesley Logan  You know, we don't do on this recaps. We don't even introduce ourselves.Brad Crowell  Oh yeah, I thought about that the other day. (Lesley: We do at the very end.) Yeah. Yeah.Lesley Logan  And like one of, one, like our our our our coach Jill and Danny on every one of their episodes, they go they still cool man. Like they all, like this make sure that you know the voice is and we're like, we're gonna make all the assumptions you know, why you're here and sink or swim. Here we go. (Brad: Yeah.) Maybe we'll stick to the script.Brad Crowell  Okay, now let's talk about Elle Russ. Okay. A firm believer that confidence is the key to success in almost every area of your life. Elle Russ is the author of Confident As Fu*k. She's a speaker and a podcaster. She helps clients materialize dreams and goals, create better business and personal relationships and become the best at whatever it is that they're doing. She's also a world renowned thyroid expert that has overcome her own health struggles to find full confidence. So the thyroid portion of this you guys didn't even get into it. (Lesley: No.) During the episode, (Lesley: No.) I was actually very interested in that but looks like we're gonna have to have Elle back ...Lesley Logan  We'll have to have her back because the thyroid thing is like this crazy thing that's going on in this world that we're like people need to know more about so and that could be affecting you being it till you see it if your thyroids off. Guess what? Y'all you're not functioning to your best. So (Brad: Yeah.) another episode. So what I loved in this episode is, what is confidence? Yeah. And she said confidence is some of the thoughts you think and then the actions you take and like, yeah.Brad Crowell  Confidence is the sum of the thoughts that you think and the actions that you take.Lesley Logan  Yeah, because you can, you can, you can think about something all the time, but if you don't take any action than actually, you, you have you actually going to create lack of confidence because you've got all these ideas and you don't do anything. And so now you don't have any, like, you don't have this like, data showing like I do the things that I'm thinking about. And so I really loved how she said that because people are always like, what is confident? How we more confident? Well take this some of your thoughts. And then take the action.Brad Crowell  The action to take. I mean, I know on this pod, you've heard Lesley say, you know, 100 times if you've heard she say at once, action creates clarity and clarity ...Lesley Logan  And actions, action is the antidote to fear.Sorry, yeah. No. I say, (Brad laughs) It says, action brings clarity and action is the antidote to fear. When you have a fear, if you take action, it's the antidote. And then boom, clarity arises. So I guess you could say clarity is the antidote to fear. Maybe, maybe, not all the time, but I think some of the time can be that way. So you didn't jack it up. I think ...Brad Crowell  Yeah. I've never understood it that way before. But (Lesley: Yeah.) action brings clarity and clarity is the antidote to fear. (Lesley: Yeah.) So you know ... yeah. So but basically, that's what she's talking about here too. Confidence is the sum of your thoughts and then the actions that you take.Lesley Logan  Yeah, when you take action, you get clarity, so that you take more action to get more clarity. And it just kind of, it kind of snowball is in there. And I I think it's really easy for us to think some thoughts about something that's amazing. And then we think about all the things that are reasons why we shouldn't, do it. And then of course, you feel like shit afterwards, like you don't, no one walks away from self talk of like, all the reasons why they shouldn't do something, feeling good about themselves. But if you take some action, and it doesn't have to be big action, it can just be like Googling the thing that you're thinking about doing. Right? Like, listen to Laurie Harder. She wants to have her like she's gonna have a beverage company, she didn't know how to like, make a beverage. So she could have just thought about how she doesn't have to do that. And then she's like, "Okay, I'm just gonna take this one action like Google, how do I do that?" And then she found some words she didn't know. And then she Googled those. And like, those, even just Googling is an action you can take to get the clarity that you want to have. And so really, and then that brings confidence, like, okay, I can do this because I have information around the thing that I want to do. And now I have the step, the next step to take. (Brad: Yeah.) So I'm in. I thought, I was like, oh, mic drop, and we can just put that on a frame and remind ourselves, that's what it comes from, you can't just think things and you can't you can't just do things, you got to kind of do them together. What did you love?Brad Crowell  So this is a little bit of a collection of things that you two, we're going back and forth. But as I was listening through the episode, you were talking about the necessity of speaking up for yourself. Okay, and particularly, people who are like people pleaser mentality, and the idea of speaking up for yourself. So I'm gonna read a whole bunch of things. And then we can kind of talk about, but you were talking about boundaries and direct communication. And basically, the, the idea here is if you don't speak up for yourself, you end up being a victim. And you want your and you're allowing yourself to be the victim, for allowing whatever it is to happen to you. Right. If you don't speak up for yourself. And her example was her friend was getting her hair cut, and she wanted it to be flat across the banks, but her barber or hairstylist was doing like choppy. Right. And then she came back the next time and like, still did it choppy. And so you know, she's allowing herself to be the victim of this. And it's building resentment. It's all these things. And what you two were discussing, which I thought was really amazing, was you can be declarative, and not confrontational. Okay. Declarative, and not confrontational. So you can say, "Hey, I would love for my bangs to be flat this time." That's not confrontational, not like, "Hey, asshole last time I told you to cut to be flat and you made him choppy." Right. That's confrontational. So you can be declarative. It doesn't have to be confrontational. We can say what is on our mind. And it doesn't have to be a huge sit down. It doesn't have to be like, "Okay, can I have five minutes of your time? Just the two of us. I just need to talk to you about something right now." Like that's so dramatic. It's so like, you're building this whole massive thing up and it doesn't again, that's like leading to awkwardness which could bring confrontation. Right. And another thing you said is, you can actually make people feel good while you're doing it. And so what that is, I'm sure you've heard this, if you've ever been a coach of any team, and you have to critique a student or a child or anything like that, or you know, the coach, usually they say, compliment, critique compliment, right? You sandwich it. Okay, so compliment, critique compliment. So, you know, "I'm so happy to be here today to get my hair cut. Hey, do you mind cutting it this time flat instead of it? You know, because I know you're so good at that." Compliment, critique compliment, right? And so it also allows you to make them feel good while you're basically correcting a behavior. You know, or standing up for yourself speaking up for yourself. Right. It can be done in tones. If I said, you know, "Cut my hair flat." (Lesley: And I think he's like) Whoa, whoa, (Lesley: whoa, oh, my God, get out of my chair.) You know, cut my hair flat. You know what I mean? Like, so funny, right? But tones can really, really change that. And yeah, I think that's enough. I had a couple of other points. But this is like, you know ...Lesley Logan  That was such a great part of the of the episode. And I really hope you all listen to it. Because she, I had not, I have always been proponent of like, just just tell people, it doesn't be a big deal. I'll just be like, you know, can we do it like this this time? But what I, what I loved how she said it was like, you know, you can say, "This time, I'd like to do my bangs and oh, by the way, I love that shampoo you gave me last time. I'm loving it." (Brad: Right. Yeah.) It just and it's kind of like what you said it's on a sandwich. But it's like, you know, it's it's got the thing, and it's just ...Brad Crowell  She call it like a throwaway (Lesley: Yeah) talking point, (Lesley: a throwaway) you know, where it's like a nice compliment. And it's like, actually, it softens the blow as it were of the critique or the heart and the harshness or the correction that you are, you know, standing up for yourself.Lesley Logan  Yeah, and I think, I think also just to go, if you've never done this before, it's okay. If the first couple of times just feel really awkward, you kind of have to prep yourself, again, for a little rehearsal, (Brad: Yeah, yeah) that's fine. But what I hope you do is celebrate when you do it inside your head, like, "Oh, I just did that. Oh, I did that." (Brad: Yeah.) Because you're going to find that becomes easier and easier to do that. And then people just are like, "Oh, that person just knows what they want." No one's gonna go, "Oh, that's a bitch." They're gonna be like, "Oh gosh she always knows she wants, she gets what she like, it's so amazing." They're just like, "He did it so well." And all of a sudden, you're like the person that everyone's looking to, to, like, get the things you want. So I that, that segment needs to be saved and re listened to.Brad Crowell  Yeah, 100%. It was really, really revealing for me, you know, I think that I used to work in a job where I had to be the quote unquote, "bad guy" with things like if if something was wrong, I was the one who has to fix it. And so I had to go constantly have, you know, very challenging conversations all the time. And I remember at the beginning of that, like, I was stressing, I was sweating having this conversation with what, and we're talking like a vendor, that, like, made a mistake. And you know, it was like, expensive and time and we didn't have the time or the money. And I was like, I had to basically go yell at them and not yell at them, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, and get them to do the thing, fix the thing without pissing them off yet still, make sure it was corrected, and make sure it didn't happen again. And I just remember, like, I sat down, I wrote, I like literally wrote down on my, everything I needed to absolutely communicate. And then it was like, alright, cool. And then I took a nice one walk around the block, cooled my head. And then I got on a call. And, and I was like, okay, this wasn't as bad as I thought it was gonna be. And, and then over time, over the years, and having conversations similar to that as things, you know, as life happens in operations, there's always something that goes wrong. The, you know, you kind of get good at it, you start to figure it out. And, and also you don't, it doesn't have to be this big, massive build up, unless you want it to be, you know what I mean? And that can be part of it too, down the road, when you know what you're doing with this, these kinds of conversations.Lesley Logan  And that's something to notice, like, if you keep making things a big deal, that could be kind of a pattern that you are feeding off of a little bit, there's something there there. But I want to go back to like, I know a lot of people listening to this can be our teachers and have these clients who like ask certain things or demand certain things, and you're like, "Oh, my God, I felt like, I don't do that. Then I'm gonna loose this client." First of all, it's okay to lose a client then, like, if you're so afraid of anything that you do as the version of yourself, that is the best version of yourself pissing off someone off for them to leave, then they need to go. So that's first and foremost. And so the thought some of your thoughts and the actions you take are going to be the confidence you need to go for someone to go. I had this one client she every third session, she would say that we have to do things differently because it was hurting her back. And the third time she said that to me over I was like, I recall the session we had and the reason we went to a pre Pilates session for that day because she had told me I spent the last eight hours moving art in my garage, she has a art person. And I said, when she said that, I said, look, I gave you a pre Pilates session, it couldn't have been more protective of your back than I like it couldn't have been. What you have to recognize is all the things you do on the many hours, you're not here with me, make a difference in how your back feels. (Brad: Sure.) This is not the only thing that works your back. And so I really love working with you. But if that's going to be a problem, then this isn't gonna work out. And she like snap to it and like, gosh, like, okay, and like was fine. So it wasn't fun. I did not play that through in my head beforehand, because it happened in the session. (Brad: Yeah.) And I but I will say that, having those thoughts about how do I stand up for myself with clients that are truly not respecting me as their teacher and wanting to be the teacher of their own session, which is not, that's not what you pay me for. You pay me to teach you. So having that and then taking that action. I got so much frickin confidence from that as like. So I just say, you know, it's okay, did not I did not say it in like a mean way. I like literally, I was like really honest with her. And I and I said it with a smile on my face. And I just said, I hate to lose you. But you know, I want you to feel safe. And if you don't, (Brad: Yeah) that's okay. And you do that one time and oh you'll have their pick kicking your step ladies, you will and (Brad: Yeah) find gentlemen listening. Brad Crowell  All right. So finally, let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Elle Russ? So this is a two parter. Where she didn't actually explicitly say the second part, but I inferred it. So I wanted to break it down a little bit more. She said, identify the pattern. Okay. But then the two of you also had a conversation about changing the pattern, which we just briefly discussed a little bit ago. But effectively, what is the pattern that happens to me, but not other people? What are those patterns that keep happening? You know, like, for example, I think we've talked about this before, but you're going to keep dating the same people until you change. Okay. And that's funny to say, it's it's like, (Lesley: Oh) the until you change part is not obvious, actually.Lesley Logan  I know, you keep thinking you change the partner, but it's actually you. (Brad: Yeah, it's actually you.) That's what Lauren Zoeller would say.Brad Crowell  Right, so what are the patterns that keep happening to me? But none of the people and why are those things happening to me? And she talked about writing them down. What are, write down those patterns, right? And, and then she said, patterns will continue to happen until you stop them. And then how do you change those patterns? Right? So, right, she said, she start small, okay, small changes of some of these patterns, and write down the changes that you're going to make. So, you know, for example, let's say you keep getting clients that late cancel on you, okay, and I'm just going to compare this to teachers, again. If you continue to get clients that late cancel you, and you're annoyed by that it's, you know, what's happening over time builds resentment, frustration, you know, anger, all the things, eventually you explode, you know, one time and you just, like, throw things at the wall, because they, you know, they like to canceled on you again, you know, and so you can, you know, start small, by making a change in you, in making a change in your policies, and making the change in how you address these situations. There's a lot of little micro changes that you can make, but pick one and then do it.Lesley Logan  Well, you can go back to dating relationships, because because everyone listens has done that. If the partner you're with, never picks up around the, like picks up their dirty laundry, and you never say to pick up your dirty laundry. And then the one day, we've all done it, where you just fucking lose it. (Brad: Yeah. You freak out.) Like something happens, has nothing to do laundry, but you trip on the laundry and you're like, "You never pick this up." And they're like, "You never told me. Like, do you never say that bothered you?" (Brad: Right.) Do you see the common denominators? You, you didn't, you tripped on it. You never said anything. You kept it to yourself, and you thought, "Oh, this will just be fine." It's not fine. If it bothers you say something.Brad Crowell  Yeah, I mean, definitely, you know, that's annoying. (Lesley: That's changer.) I completely understand. It's annoying that they don't pick up their stuff, but like, have you expressed it? You know, and if you have and has it been in a angry way, like we talked about the beginning or a kind way, you know, so, you know, I think start small write down the changes that you're making. Right? And then something else was that she said, which kind of goes in parallel to that is to detach yourself from people who are toxic. She was talking about confidence and dreams and but, you know, basically change could be, you know, isolation, or actually. But I just realized I'm spilling into your takeaway. So, what about you? Lesley Logan  I was just like, I was just like, "Oh were you just gonna tell you all the takeaways." And you just gonna say ... because I'm gonna just pipe in and just say, "Excuse me, it's my takeaway." Thank you.Brad Crowell  Yeah, hey, don't take my takeaway. (Lesley: Don't take my takeaway.) Don't take my takeaway. (Lesley laughs) Did you like you know, not take my takeaway, please.Lesley Logan  Hey, I loved your takeaway. But can I have my takeaway back? (Brad laughs) Thank you. So keep your dreams close to the vest. You know, here's we, first of all, we had a whole conversation and she was quite blunt about you hanging around people who are not super awesome for you. (Brad: Yeah.) And that bluntness might be hard to take, but like, I love honesty, it's the best policy and just so like, keep dreams close the best, here's the deal. It's important to have people in your life that you can share things with. But if you don't have those people in your life, you gotta you gotta keep those things close to your vest, so that you, especially if you are not yet feeling confident around things, you gotta build that confidence up before you share things. Because when you share something, and you are vulnerable around it, you are not yet confident in it. And someone says, the thing that you're probably worried about, because they will, you know, that's going to shatter that dream, and you might not make it happen. And so you be mindful of that.Brad Crowell  Yeah, can be a big stumbling block with your confidence. (Lesley: Oh, yeah.) So, you know, keeping them clo... keeping your dreams close to your vest, you know, basically, she kept referring to Mary, I don't know, apparently, Mary's angry. So Mary doesn't believe in you. Mary doesn't believe in herself. Mary, actually, you know, shit talks, the goals that you have, and the dreams that you have. And so, really, but Mary has been your best friend for 30 years? Well, you know, Mary's not helping you, she's actually not being your friend. She's actually what she's doing is projecting her fears onto you. (Lesley: Yeah) Those fears could simply be her own, you know, like, like, lack of dreams. But those fears could also be fear of loss. If you are successful with the thing, maybe that thing takes you away from her. She doesn't want that. Right. She doesn't really understand even though she's sabotaging you, (Lesley: Yeah.) but she is.Lesley Logan  Yeah. No, and so you may have to stop, stop telling Mary some things and you might have to find. Like I have some friends that I really told my business stuff to. And I have some friends I just talk about life with. And it's (Brad: Sure.) not because I don't actually, the friends I got my life with probably would totally support those business ideas and dreams. But they're not yet solidified yet, all the way. And those friends that are like my life friend might not really understand it. And if I get a question that at all, is like where I'm a little worried and something it could totally derail it. And it's not because they're bad. Like they're doing it intentionally. It's just like, I'm not confident on that thing yet. So make sure you know who you want to tell things to and who you don't. And so take practice. And if you're a 30 year old friend of Mary, that you've had forever and your life is being like that. It's okay to just start like, maybe don't talk to Mary every day. Maybe Mary gets a weekly call, and then maybe Mary gets 10 day call and then they call. And if, and if Mary asks you what's going on, because Mary built up the gumption you can go, "Wow, that's amazing. Thank you for asking. I'm just really working on some things right now. (Brad: Yeah.) I love you. Working on some things right now." It is okay. I don't know why a lot of people like to keep friends around. But don't make them feel happy. They're so afraid to like, let go of these people. It's not that it's you can pick them back up when you are strong enough to handle those things. (Brad: Yeah.) Until you have the confidence around the things you want to do and the life you want to have. You need to be super protective of it. You need to, you need to make sure you have all the protection up before you take it on to the world. You know, so I hope this helps you with your confidence, guys. I really, I might put this on repeat. I really loved it. It's so good.Brad Crowell  Yeah, yeah. And I can't wait to have Elle Russ back to talk about her, her, you know, experience with the thyroid stuff too. So ...Lesley Logan  I know. Elle, that's your your invitation. (Brad: Yeah.) Call us back. Well, I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell  And, I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan  Thank you so much for joining us today. We are so grateful to have you here. How are you going to use these tips in your life to build your confidence? Let us know. Tag @_elleruss, tag the @be_it_pod. Share it with your girlfriend, share with this with Mary. You know the one, (Lesley laughs) the one with your life. (Brad: ... we send it to Mary.) Hey, Mary (Lesley and Brad laughs) I've really ... Do whatever you want with it. But whatever you do make sure that you are taking messy action because perfect is boring and until next time, Be It Till You See It.Brad Crowell  Bye for now.Lesley Logan  'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell   It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.Lesley Logan   Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing. Brad Crowell  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all videos each week so you can.Brad Crowell  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today's episode, “The Embodiment of Dating & Relationships,” features my guest Lauren Zoeller. Lauren is a 7-figure entrepreneur, host of The Aligned Love podcast, speaker, and author. As the Founder of The Aligned Love Experience™, Lauren is an expert practitioner in reparenting, generational healing, and Somatic Experiencing. Through her work, she created the proprietary Voice Activation Method™ that has been used to help thousands of men and women heal from past trauma and take ownership of their future.You'll hear as Lauren explains how our body processes trauma. You'll be blown away by Lauren's exploration of finding safety and why we repeat patterns and need time to ourselves. Would you know if you are using breathing techniques, exercises, and meditation the wrong way? Do you communicate the right way? What does it take to make a relationship work? Lauren answers this and so much more as Ken opens up and shares his own struggles and wins. This episode is far-reaching and will help you learn the language of the nervous system and make you a better individual, spouse, and partner. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it on social media and tag Ken Joslin.

We have all heard it, “sending positive vibes”. But how do “vibes” really play into our day-to-day life? Brad and Lesley recap Dr. Vic's interview and dive into the impact and signs of high vs low vibrations, the importance of finding your anchor, and letting the right energy direct your path. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Winter road trips and upcoming events What a high vibration state means The signs of high or low vibrationsThe benefits of operating in a high vibration How to use a pause as a resetWhy you need to be enlightened and aware to use it as a compass for directing energyCreating your vision so you have a compassUse your vibrations to find what is for youEpisode References/Links:Agency Mini profitablepilates.com/mini  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.Be It Till You See It Podcast SurveyResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co hosts in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the abundant Convo I had with Dr. Vic in our last episode. If you haven't yet listen to that interview with feel back, feel free. Feel free to pause this now and go back and listen to that one and then come back and join us. It was there's so much information, there's so much positivity. (Brad: Yeah.) He was like, he was like taking like a dose like a like a, do you know what I mean? Like a zap off ... like of zap off of positivity and ability. And I just really enjoyed that.Brad Crowell  Think he was giving it. (Lesley: Yeah.) Yeah.Lesley Logan  So anyways, if you're listening to this in real time, we're in Nashville. (BradL In Nashville.) Yeah, we're hanging out with episode, I can't think of the number but I think it was in the 40s, Lauren Zoeller. Lauren Zoeller. (Brad: Zoeller) Yeah. Lauren Zoeller. We're hanging out her house. And we're hanging out a bunch of, actually, I think are gonna I think we're in meetings with a bunch of people who've been on the pod.Brad Crowell  Yeah. Also Amber Shaw.Lesley Logan  I know. I know. I hope she's there.Brad Crowell  Maybe Tori. (Lesley: I think so.) We're going to a coaching weekend. (Lesley: Yeah.) We're actually going to bump into a bunch of people ...Lesley Logan  Bunch of are friends. (Brad: Yeah.) That's how we hang out. We're like, (Brad: We're friends.) we're like ...Brad Crowell  slash let's all learn together.Lesley Logan  Let's all learn together. It's a write off, we get to hang out and write it off. (Lesley laughs) Oh my gosh, it's so fun. So anyways, we come home. And we literally kick off our seventh Agency Mini, which is our seven day coaching program, which you've been listening to this show. You've heard us talk about it. And you have the final moments if we have spots left to sign up right now. And if there are no spots left to get on the waitlist for the next one. If you're like, I'll just wait for the next one, then you shouldn't you shouldn't try to get into this one because ...Brad Crowell  You should totally try to get into this one. This one's going to be amazing. We are going to have a couple of guest coach appearances.Lesley Logan  Yeah, we are we are.Brad Crowell  ... You'll have to be there.Lesley Logan  Yeah, I know some of them are going to be total surprises for even our Agency members. (Brad: Yeah.) Which is really exciting who we have some of our Agency members on Profitable, hanging out instead of Mini to support everybody. But we only offer this twice a year. So if you wait to the next time, you're literally holding your business back for months of generating income and getting support and maybe not wasting time on things that won't work and actually like dial in things that well. So that's happening. And then we go to Chicago (Brad: Yeah.) for Pilates on tour. (Brad: That's gonna be fun.) And Erika Quest and I are teaching a workshop together. And then you have a table with our flashcards and our book.Brad Crowell  Yeah, come hang with Brad at the table.Lesley Logan  And then we come home on our seventh year wedding anniversary on the day. And then we have 48 hours to get ready for a bunch of people to be at our house (Brad: Yeah.) for our business retreat. (Brad: Yeah.) So woah! I'm so excited for water, sleep, my higher dose mad, my red light therapy and our incredible team who helps us get all of this done so that we can support all these people because we frickin love doing it.Brad Crowell  Absolutely, I can't I really can't wait to see everyone not only hanging out in Nashville, but actually getting to meet a bunch of people in the Pilates world in Chicago. And then of course, diving diving deep into your businesses for those of you who are joining us here in Las Vegas for the business retreat. (Lesley: Yeah.) So I can't wait.Lesley Logan  I was like dipping. What are we dipping?Brad Crowell  Yeah. We are dipping. If you want ... more information about Agency Mini, just go to profitablepilates.com/miniLesley Logan  Yeah, and Pilates on tour is on the Balanced Body site. And you you can't miss it. Like it's gonna be amazing. It's the first in person event they've had since the last time I was with them, which was in October 2018. So wow! (Brad: Yeah.) Holy frickin moly. (Brad: in a minute) Here we go in a minute. I'm gonna need a question from the audience, Brad.Brad Crowell  Yeah. So we got a question from someone asking, "Are you planning to drive around the country again this winter?" And the answer is, yes.Lesley Logan  Yes. We're still, at this moment of recording, we are still working on it. But we did see it, we did get to talk to Joel.Brad Crowell  We did. I think that this kind of goes hand in glove with our tours that we have been doing the last handful of years. You know, skipping COVID year of course, but I think this this year, we have a different timeline. We have to be back in Vegas for January one for a wedding.Lesley Logan  For actually December 31. (Brad: Oh, December 31 for a wedding.) Yeah, I know. So we are working on planning out the route. And we're kind of thinking we'll leave a little earlier and do the tour before the holiday.Brad Crowell  Yeah. It'll probably all happen first. And then we'll hang (Lesley: We haven't ...) with family before turning around and come to Vegas.Lesley Logan  We have not ... Yeah. We have not picked all the cities yet. We're still working that out. And so you can throw your city in. (Brad: Yeah.) You absolutely can throw your city and I will say ...Brad Crowell  It's gonna be a different route this year than normal because we don't have the luxury. I was really hoping to get up into the Northeast. Get up into Canada even but I'm not sure we're gonna pull it off this year.Lesley Logan  He always has hopes it will dry and (Brad: ... really we're going Canada.) no winter time. I know. But I don't want to go, why would we drive into Toronto in the winter? (Brad: Because we're going to be on that side of the world.) To my Torontonians I fucking love you. I just don't like, tell Brad if like summer driving into Toronto is a better idea. (Brad: I know it is. I've been there.) Yeah. (Brad: Yes.) I have not. But anyways, so we you can throw your city out there. Typically, we have host studios. They're usually affiliates of OPC. And they basically help us promote it in the area. We pop in, we do a workout, we have a little hang. And then Brad and I give the dogs walk and get back on the road. But we're super excited to get that planned. And so yeah, we the answer is yes. I know the answer before is like I don't know. But the answer is now, yes. And I'm excited to, I'm excited to do like just it's like a one legged tour. It's like a tour on one end. (Brad: We're gonna hop.) Yeah, we're gonna hop hop hop. But yeah, it's, but we're very excited to be able to attend a wedding. So we're trying to make that work, which just means traveling back from Philly to Las Vegas in literally four days.Brad Crowell  We've done it and we've done it faster.Lesley Logan  We've done it faster. So I think it's possible. (Brad: It's possible.) Yeah, it's possible. Okay. So yeah, you can just hit up opc.me/chat if you want to throw your city and there and then our team will figure out like if whether if you're on a route that allows us to get from, I wouldn't say a to b but it's literally LV to PA and, and back. So and you would be surprised what's on the route because Atlanta is on that route. We are working out (Brad: Oh, yeah.) Atlanta. We talked to Joel as I mentioned from Vitality Method. So we'll see you there.Brad Crowell  Looking forward to that. Okay, now let's talk about Dr. Victor Manzo, transitioning from a practicing Pediatric Chiropractor meaning kids. Right? I didn't know. (Lesley and Brad laughs)Lesley Logan  The way you said that was like as if the word Pediatric is is new.Brad Crowell  It is like I didn't know Chiropractors worked on kids.Lesley Logan  Brian, our Chiropractor (Brad: I know Brian does) works on kids. He has pictures of kids.Brad Crowell  Before I met Brian, I didn't know that was a thing. So yes, I didn't realize that Chiropractors could do that. Anyway, moving right along. A practicing Pediatric Chiropractor too, a spiritual business mindset coach. Dr. Vic is on a mission to influence and help people become aware of their limiting beliefs, their habits, standards, and the stories they tell themselves. Then he shares his insights to help them reframe and change their beliefs to support life they love. Dr. Vic is also the creator and owner of The Mindful Experiment Podcast and the author of three books that are seeking to assist people in their everyday spiritual lives.Lesley Logan  And also, just so you know, Manzo is like the American way and Manzo is the Italian way. So if you if you can say either, apparently, but if you wanted a little education in languages. (Brad: Good to know.) Yeah. (Brad: Dr. Victor Manzo.) Yeah.Brad Crowell  But you have to say it with a British accent.Lesley Logan  I know. I'm saying, I don't think that's how it sounds either. But we're just gonna keep going. I'm just gonna let that roll. Okay, one thing I love that he said was our job is to stay at a high vibration. And I think we can all agree that that is a very positive and helpful thing. And I think the next question is like, "Okay, but how do we do this?" Because you can no longer go, "Yes, I need to stay in high vibration" and then boom, you're in a low vibration state and it's like, "Oh, I'm trying to stay in a high vibration."Brad Crowell  I don't even know what a high vibration state means.Lesley Logan  Okay. Well, that's, that's an even better question. So I would say you are in a high vibration. There's a flow state, you know, when like, things come easy to you when you're at work, and you just like, just get a ton of stuff done. You said this before, like, "I got a ton of stuff done."Brad Crowell  Oh, yeah. (Lesley: Yeah.) I always looked forward to that. Like I really, and it was like, for me, it was like, "Don't ever talk to me, don't bother me. I mean, I'm in the zone."Lesley Logan  Yeah. But it's, you often don't know that you don't want anyone talk to you because you're until you're in the zone, you (Brad: Yeah.) don't go, "Don't talk to me, I'm in the zone." (Brad laughs) That would not be a high vibration. You are, you like start to get in this flow state and you start to and everything comes a little easier for you. And so when you're in that, that's like you're trying to tap into that. And that state and that's not easy. And you cannot be there if you're like, "Oh, fuck this, this thing is not working." Ah that you like, though, when you get when you're really snappy at little things, you are in a low vibration. So just just a quick thing if you are like if somebody bumps into on the street, or someone cuts you off while you're driving, there's your sign. You're not a high vibration. But if you are like driving, and someone ...Brad Crowell  Well, it depends on how you react to them cutting you off. You don't have any control over them cutting him off, but how you react to them. (Lesley: Correct.) Yeah.Lesley Logan  Yeah. So anyways, you don't have a buffer on your cars like this a high vibration car, park up. (Lesley laughs) Anyways, so the idea is like, we have to our job is to try to stay at the high vibration. Now that requires work. But that's what job is, that's what a job is. It's also an exercise. And you're going to have times where it's easier to stay the high vibration and times when it's harder. And you you maybe can't stay in there as long because you tap out sooner. But you know what it's up, the more you can, he said anchoring will help you find a high vibration moment in your life. So anchoring is he's, a lot of times people use this, like anchor into something. So you can think back to a time this what do you exit, think back to a time when you it was easy for you to do that. Like we just was like, oh, you know, when you say you're at work, and you do it like this. So you you think about what that is? And then you can also think about what happened before that, that allowed that flow state to happen or how did you set that up, so becomes really easy for you. So if there was a time when you like, were really confident or really positive in your life, it was a really happy moment, you can go and go into meditation, you can think about that moment. And then you can go, you can actually feel it in your body. Like if I asked you to feel about a time right now, everybody think back to the time when you were like, feeling the most positive, like, on top of the world. Like you just felt like, "Oh my God, this is the most amazing, I never want to stop." Sometimes for me, it's on the top of a hike in Hawaii, like when you're there and like you're like, "Wow, I just feel so like, literally in inside myself in the most positive and like, I never want this to end. What did that feel like? What does it sound like? Like, what does it taste like?"Brad Crowell  Yeah, a lot of times it's an achievement or a win that you've, you know, just add in your life and whether that was a something that you've been, you know, chasing for a very long time or something that just happened, you know, for you remember how you felt in that moment. You know, there's a he describes it later on in the pod as like the moment of bliss or joy, you know exuberance, happiness. And you know, that I think that he, he kept saying something throughout it that was a little bit woo for me, he's like, you gotta like, you know, be in the vibe. And it's funny because I use the word vibe, but like I am, what was really surprising to me is that he's a doctor who went into being a spiritual guide, which is kind of the opposite of what I expect most people to do, because they're trying to prove something right and so they go and they really get into like science and medicine and like proof, and tangible, and logic and like he is all the foundation of that doctoral, you know, logic and then he's actually applying it into the spiritual, the the attaining a spiritual life (Lesley: Yeah.) and, and when he's talking about this vibe, he said he said that the he said basically when you're operating when you are attaining achieving in a higher vibe, you are going to have a better life. (Lesley: Yeah.) And you're going to achieve more things. Life is going to work for you more often, (Lesley: People want to be around you.) people want to be around you. Yeah, he talks about that, like being in a room around someone who is operating at a higher vibe, you want to just be in their presence. And you know, and then, and then when you two were talking about like, well, how do you, how do you identify the higher vibe? That's what he's talking about anchoring. Remembering a moment where you've had a crazy celebration in your life or something really amazing. And he talks about his daughter, or if it is not his his child just being born six weeks ago or whatever. And in that moment of joy that he felt, then is something that that's an anchor, that's something he can be like, "Okay, cool."Lesley Logan  Yeah. Yeah, I think like, so find your anchor. And then, and then if you are ever out, if you're ever feeling like, "Wow, I'm just like losing it every few minutes, right now, today is not a great day." Take five seconds to like, go back to that moment, like maybe have to write on a post it notes. So you just it's easily I know, I can't think of good things when it's a bad thing. So I like have it somewhere where you can easily access it. (Brad: Yeah.) And and then go try to anchor into that and see if you can tap into that high vibration. I know for me, I'll turn on my red light therapy, and I'll sit and play this one little mantra meditation takes like five minutes. And it's like, all these positive mantras. And I'm like, "I feel so good when it's over." So you know (Brad: Well ...) your thoughts, the tools out there.Brad Crowell  I liked that you said that, because he was talking about forcing it, you know, and taking a pause, and allowing that to be effectively like a reset button, you know, and he was, there was actually a lot of conversation about forcing it. And I know, I know that I do that. Or I'm like, "I have to get this done. I only have another hour to get this done." And I'm like ehhh. Right. And and like to be honest, it's generally not my best work.Lesley Logan  Or it takes longer if you just take in 15 minutes to like, go rest, go reset, you (Brad: Yeah.) might come back and get it done faster. And you won't, it'll be better work.Brad Crowell  Yeah. (Lesley: Yeah.) And that, you know, it can be as simple meditation as it were, where you are effectively stepping back from something that might be frustrating you and and reflecting back to what your your anchor is, where you can, "Okay, how do I reframe where I'm at right now? How do I get back into joy?" Right. Before I then go get back into this project that I have to get done. (Lesley: Yeah.) So yeah, that's really interesting. And what I really loved about that is a) I felt there was a very practical approach, but also to, he said, "Hey, look, you know, give yourself a break here." This is something that's a habit you have to create, you know, you can conceptualize it right now. But in the moment, you may forget. And so you know, it's okay. This something you need to practice.Lesley Logan  Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you can't get in like, I think it's so weird that we want to get everything right the first time. I say this with Agency members, like we teach them something, and then they get frustrated, like, "I can't do it." It's like, "We'll you just learned it, like five seconds ago." Once you don't, like you don't like you can get it conceptually, but then you got to do it. And you're like, "Ah, it's a great." Because you just learned it. You just learned you have to do it again. And then you have to learn it from a different angle. And then you have to like put into your own words. So you can't you have to just be, you have to just be kind to yourself. And (Brad: Yeah.) like when you are being hard on yourself about how you're not good enough. The first time you do something you are that's just here's your sign. Not a high vibration. I feel like Jeff Foxworthy, "Here's your sign, you are in low vibration."Brad Crowell  All right, so finally, let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Dr. Vic, Victor Manzo? (Lesley: Yeah.) He had, he kind of he repeated himself a handful of times throughout the thing, the whole interview so I thought that was great because it made it he's got like a very clear path on how to stay in that high vibration. And so right out of the gate, he said, "You need to have or create your vision." Okay, and that vision for, the vision is for your life. You know, do you see yourself staying where you are doing the thing you're doing? Is that something you love and you're already doing that thing? Or are you not where you want to be? Where do you want to be? And he suggested to make that like an anchor or sorry to play that like a movie in your head and associate it with those vibes from the anchor that we already talked about earlier. Right? So you know, if you are like, I'm going to get that promotion at work, you know, and so "see" yourself getting the promotion at work. I mean, you hear this actually, from football players all the time, like, see yourself scoring the goal, see yourself catching the ball, see yourself getting past the opponent, whatever, you know. And then he talked about relating that vision that you're creating with the emotions, the joy from that moment that you're anchored.Lesley Logan  You know, they've actually done studies where they had people think about working out like literally put their mindset into like, actually, like lifting weights in their mind. And then they had people workout, but not think about it. And then they had people do both. And the people who worked out and people thought about working out had the same strength scores.Brad Crowell  I did not know that.Lesley Logan  Yeah, like, yeah, it's because our mind is so powerful. (Brad: Amazing.) And like when I was talking with Jay, Jay Grimes, he's my Pilates mentor. He, I told him this, and he's like, "Oh, yeah." He's like, "I used to get so tired after teaching two hours, because my body was like, doing the workout with them." Like, the muscle, like, he's like, "I wasn't rounding forward, I was just standing there. But like, my muscles, were doing the things." And I because you're like, (Brad: So, I mean ...) feeling it, you know. And so even ...Brad Crowell  No wonder teaching can be very draining.Lesley Logan  It can be and then people bring their own weird emotions too. And then client's bring theirs.Brad Crowell  They are bringing those low vibrations.Lesley Logan  Yeah. (Brad: Yeah.) But he, but he talks about, like, you know, even he says, now he's like, "Mate, I want to, I want to, like, I want to feel, I want to feel your mood while exercising. Like, I, he can't do it now. So I want to feel for you, you know, so you gotta do that way." (Brad: Sure.) So I think you have it, I love what his point was. And I think like, it's not, I don't think we give ourselves enough time to sit still. And like picture the thing that we want. And like, create that, like, see the vision. (Brad: Yeah.) And even if you're not a visual person, then write it frickin down.Brad Crowell  Yeah, he did talk about that. He said, a lot of people, maybe they can't, like, create, like a movie in their head, but they can write it down and then and they create the story that way. (Lesley: Yeah.) Yeah, totally.Lesley Logan  So, I really loved um, become aware and use it for that as a compass for the work that you want to achieve. So like he was talking about vibe and paid attention and the excitement gave a whole demonstration about like, rub your hands. Do you ever remember? I remember being a kid in a school bus and like, we would like put our hands like, do you ever do this? Where you like put your hand like close to their hands? You could do with me. Do with me. Give me your hand. (Brad: Okay.) And like you would you would like get close with your hand and (Brad: Oh, yeah.) they got further away. (Brad: I feel the heat.) And you can, yeah, you feel that, you can feel energy. (Brad: Yeah.) Yeah. So we've ...Brad Crowell  He actually talked about taking your hands and rubbing them together. (Lesley: Yeah.) And then holding them slightly apart and you can feel you know that energy between them.Lesley Logan  I'm vibing so high. I didn't even need to do that. You felt it anyway. (Brad and Lesley laugh) But anyways, like he gave like a very kinesthetic exercise you could do to feel that vibe. And you can also just the I think it's really interesting like awareness is so key. And we even talked with like Lena Franklin, she's like, once you're aware you're enlightened. But when you can actually have that feeling of like when you become aware what you're wanting and the vibe you want to have. It is so much easier to use that as a compass and know how far off you are. I'm turning because I'm like, and then like how, like a compass. Right. You can come back to it.Brad Crowell  Yeah, yeah. Sorry, I think I feel like we're missing a step to connect those dots here. So the first what he's talking about is we operate better when we are in a high vibration. Right. But we're not always in a high vibration. (Lesley: No.) Right. And so ...Lesley Logan  You can change, you can be in high vibration in the morning and low by an hour later. Like you can it's like you're a human.Brad Crowell  So the, so we operate better at a high vibration, and we're not always operating in a high vibration. Right. So then we have, how do you know what a high vibration is? That's where the anchoring is. Right? And then we have going out and doing life. And in you then once you understand, once you begin to associate high vibration, and identity be able to identify that internally throughout your day, which is where the practice part comes in. Then when you're trying something new. You can start to feel, "Am I in the right place? You know for this"? And you can start to identify like, "this thing might not be for me." You know and this other thing, "Oh yeah, this is totally for me." Because you're starting to to associate like you start to identify, "Oh, yeah, this, this makes me feel good."That's why I feel like it's a compass. Right? Because when you identify, "This is my this is my anchor. This is my high vibration." Right. And you're doing something that is like 100% not making you connect with that vibration, you can start to say, "Well, maybe maybe I don't want to go be, this isn't my thing."Lesley Logan  I also just want to like, counterpoint, which I know I talked about, we love what you said. But I think with that description, it's very easy for someone to try something new feel like their compass is off. And it's actually the people that they did the new thing with, and it's not the new thing. For example, I really loved that lyric class that I did. I thought the teacher was great. I had the best time, it was amazing. I went back, and my compass was like, "This is off. This is not fun." I left feeling worse than when I came. And then I didn't go back. And actually, the reality was, is just the people that I was with for that moment, made the compass off (Brad: Interesting.) not the thing. So I really think that people there's like ...Brad Crowell  So it's almost like something that we can bring. It's something we bring to a situation. And it's also something that we can be paying attention to.Lesley Logan  Yeah, I mean, let's just think about like, you and I used to go on hikes. We love hikes. (Brad: Yeah.) And there's a few hikes in there that I remember going, "Fuck this shit. When was this fucking hike over?" Because the people brought it the low vibration. The people took the compass the wrong way. And so I think it's like, we have to be really mindful of like, is it the activity or is or the location or is it the person? Because there are some things I frickin love doing that I would never do it some people. And so I think we can be a little quick to go, "My compass is off. This isn't for me," when actually, it that's the thing. It's just the wrong. Like, can you imagine if your first date experience blew up and was the worst thing ever? Like, I'm never dating again? No, it was the wrong date. Right? Like, or your first job was like, the most awful experience? Like I'm never working again.Brad Crowell  Yeah but I think that's exactly right. When you know that something is your high vibration. Right? For like, for example, that moment of joy, whatever that is. And then you go on a date, and you're like, "This did not bring me joy. This is nowhere where the close to where I want to feel (Lesley: Right.) to be." Then you know, then you can say, "All right, cool." You know?Lesley Logan  Yeah, but that's my point. You know, it's that person, not the dating, not the activity. You went on another date with somebody else. (Brad: Yeah.) Yeah. I think we're saying the same thing. I'm just making sure people ... (Brad: It's not always about people tho.) No, it can also be the nice amazing people on the worst activity. I think that's, I think we need to compasses. (Brad: Yeah.) Are there like compasses with like a node? A weather pattern. I don't know. Like, I feel like there's like a dewpoint that goes along. I don't know, there's just has to be another layer. Because I really, I'm a little wor... I'm a little concerned that some people will go, "Oh, my compass is off. I didn't like this thing," when maybe it's not the thing. It's like, the place where the thing was. The person where the thing was. I'm not trying to tell people to convince themselves to do something different. But I'm just a little worried that people might give up on the first try of some things based on this one particular example.Brad Crowell  Here's what I think we're gonna do. I think this is a really interesting conversation. I, we're gonna send this to Dr. Victor Manzo. And we're gonna get his input. (Lesley laughs) But in the meantime, (Lesley: Because I really love it.) in the meantime, we want your input. (Lesley: Yeah.) Where do you stand here? Is this something that you're applying or something that you're putting yourself in a situation and then feeling? Right? Or are you applying it to a situation because you're reframing your mind?Lesley Logan  Yeah, I just, I just want to I just want to make sure that we're not giving pe... like giving people, I totally agree with what he said, when I was on the podcast. What I'm a little concerned with, with just the way we're talking about it, is that we're making it so that it's, it might be too easy to write off something that just might there might be the wrong ingredient. It's like a food. It's like, if you like I like there's Latkes right, and there's all these different types of flavors. And there's a couple that I would never ever eat and there was a few that you put some apple sauce on it and fuck yeah, I want that. So I'm just I'm just trying to say like, I'm a little concerned that people might write something off that's right for them, but it was in the wrong place, people or thing.Brad Crowell  Yeah, we're gonna we're gonna we're gonna talk to doc. (Lesley laughs) And we're gonna leave us a voicemail. (Lesley: Yeah.) And put it into one of the recaps coming up.Lesley Logan  Yes. Okay, (Brad: Yeah.) sounds good. (Brad: I love it.) Okay, I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell  And I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan  Thank you so much for joining us today. We're so grateful you're here. How are you going to use these tips in your life? Let us know by sending us a DM to the pod. And or you can you can put a comment on the YouTube. (Brad: Yeah.) Um, we don't have a phone number for you to call in and leave a voicemail but you can leave a voice message on on the Instagram. So, I sound like an eighty year old, you can do on the Facebook. (Brad: You can do on the w w's) (Lesley laughs) You can do on the emails. (Brad laughs) Anyways, thank you so much and until next time, Be It Till You See It.Brad Crowell  Bye for now.Lesley Logan  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!   'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.  Brad Crowell  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.  Lesley Logan  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing. Brad Crowell  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianranco Cioffi.  Lesley Logan  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all videos each week so you can.Brad Crowell   And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How can you finally stop repairing the same negative relationships? Brad and Lesley recap somatic dating coach, Lauren Zoeller, discussing past relationships, red flags, and how to transform your dating life or current relationships. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Upcoming things to note: AGENCY MINI, Cambodia retreat, Las Vegas RetreatThe best Book recommendations for personal growth and bizHow do you give and receive love? And is it keeping you in unhealthy relationship patterns?Boredom as a driving factor and running from relationship to relationship to chase the high.The difference between a life coach and a therapist Exploring your past red flag relationships for growthWhy has every relationship ended? Episode References/Links:Follow Lauren on IGLauren's WebsiteProfitable Pilates RetreatAGENCY MINIBooks: We Should All Be Millionaires, Rachel RogersChatter. Ethan KrossRejection Proof. Jia JiangE-Squared Pam GroutGetting the Love You Want, Harville HendricksBrad Crowell PP Course How to be rejected to success with 200 noesTELL US YOUR THOUGHTS  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.Be It Till You See It Podcast SurveyResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the aligning convo I have with Lauren Zoeller in our last episode. If you haven't yet listen to interview, feel free to pause this now. Go back and listen to that one, and then come back and join us. If you don't know about somatic coaching. You should listen to the interview.Brad Crowell  Yeah, if you don't know the definition of somatic, she explained it. (Lesley: Yeah.) Lauren because it was actually great as your very first question. Like, "Hey, cool. I'm all about life coaching. What's the somatic part mean? Can you explain that?" And they dug in pretty deep. So yeah.Lesley Logan  Yeah, I know. Well, it's because I have a somatic therapist, and I didn't really understand what that title was. And she would do her therapy. And it had somatic stuff, but like, I didn't really I just was like, "Oh, we're in the woowoo world. We're just doing this." But it's actually not. It's not woowoo would all it's like totally legit science. You should totally... So go listen to it. But I love Lauren, and ...Brad Crowell  She, she's powerful.Lesley Logan  She's powerful. (Brad: Yeah.) She's super cool. And at the time that we're recording this, I'm on the eve of hanging out with her for the weekend here in Vegas. (Brad: Yeah.) So talk about, do you mind, I just say I want to say this, because it's nothing to do with anything. But if you're trying to make friends, like, do the things that just that people do want to like, share and experience together. She is coming here with a couple other women. Because I was like, "We should all hang out. I live in Las Vegas. It's a great place to come visit."Brad Crowell  Wait, really? (Lesley: Yeah. That was I said.) They came because you, you just invited them to come. (Lesley: Yeah.) That's so cool.Lesley Logan  I know. I said we should, well, I will, I won't take all the credit. They know a mutual friend, they know Tori Gordon, who is a coach because who was a coach, and she was on our podcast earlier. (Brad: Yeah.) And they're like, "Oh, yeah, Tori was talking about how we should all come to Vegas." I said, "Well, now you've two reasons to come because Tori and I live in the same neighborhood. (Brad: Great.) And you should come." And boom, set some dates. And now they're coming.Brad Crowell  That's really cool. I didn't know that. That's fun.Lesley Logan  Take action ... I'm so excited. By the time you've heard this, I've already hang out. We've already had our women's weekend and it's going to be amazing. I'll be talking about it on another episode. Anyways. We are also one month away from the time that you're listening to this. From the PP retreat. The Profitablie Pilates business retreat here in Las Vegas. (Brad: Yeah.) So if you are wanting to hang out in a very intimate, not in like a sexual way, but just like small, that's what I mean it by a small group, private event.Brad Crowell  I don't think anybody took it as sexual but but that's fair to clarify.Yeah, it's it's a, it's an intimate setting, that's a fair way to describe it. It's, it's actually a lot of fun and very transformative when it comes to digging into the customer journey that you may or may not be presenting to your customers. If you run a fitness business, or any kind of service based business, really, the principles do apply, and that we'll be recovering that weekend. And our first one that we ran earlier this year was amazing. It was so amazing. So we're really excited to be hosting a second one this year. (Lesley: It will be amazing.) It's going to be amazing. (Lesley: I'm just gonna put amazing in there one more time.) Also, amazingly, I'm not sure that we haven't set a date yet for next year. So it's not 100% that we're going to do it for next year. So if you're thinking I'll just do the next one. Just talk to us now because (Lesley: Yeah.) because it may not actually be one we want you know like we've got a lot going on next year like a lot.Lesley Logan  A lot. And I'll say I just want to say like putting off the growth of your business for next time. Can we just like talk about like ...Brad Crowell  Why wait nine more months to get started?Lesley Logan  The people who are at our first retreat, several of them made their retreat investment back within a couple of months. Of just using our project management training, of using our launch training of all this stuff. (Brad: Yeah.) They are now working on things this right now, as second rounds of things that will have (Brad: Yeah.) even better outcomes. If they had not come if they waited till next time they would not they would literally be where they were way before March making what they, making what they made before March in a time when you make more money. So I'm just saying don't wait till next time and Brad is right. We have not set dates and it's pretty unclear whether or not we will have another one in the 2023 dates we ...Brad Crowell  Look, we're hoping that we can do but (Lesley: We love it.) but but actually I also love going to Cambodia. So, yeah.Lesley Logan  We love going to Cambodia but we also love vacation.Brad Crowell  Yeah, there's that. I would like to take ... (Lesley: Yeah, so anyway ...) and idea. (Lesley: That's one month away. So ...) That's happening. Yeah, in the month. And then but what's happening is before then.Lesley Logan  Oh, Agency Mini. (Brad: Yeah.) Two, so it's like about two ish weeks away. It starts on the 18th. And ... (Brad: How it was a different than the retreat?) Okay, so Agency Mini, first of all, fold is very different. The retreat is at our house in person curated, very small group, very small group. (Brad: Yeah.) Agency Mini is not to say that it's a big group, but it is a bigger group. And ... (Brad: Yeah, it's a couple hundred people.) It's also online. We do one workshop, and we do one Q&A session, and then we answer your questions throughout the week. Whereas at the retreat, when you're on our house, we have several workshops, several times where you guys are in coaching settings. It's a very curated experience around what you're gonna be learning. Whereas inside of Agency Mini, we have a very curated webinar and homework for you. But then the rest of the week, you can really ask us anything, we'll be really honest with you.Brad Crowell  But bigger, bigger picture, though. The retreat, we're going to dig into, like I said, your customers journey (Lesley: Yeah.) and what you're putting in front of them, when to graduate them from your first product, your second product, your third product, whether that's digitally on your website, you know, or whether that is, you know, in your brick and mortar store. (Lesley:Yeah.) Where Agency Mini is a, it's a seven day taster of our ongoing coaching services, where you can we are going to dig into, we're going to help you clarify, you know exactly what it is that you offer your clients, how to connect to those clients, who those clients actually are. Right. And and then we're going to open it up for questions about anything throughout the week. So you know, and that's going to be virtual.Lesley Logan  Yeah. So profitabliepilates.com/retreat is retreat and profitable, profitablepilates.com/mini is for Agency Mini. (Brad: Yeah.) So you should sign up for that. (Brad: Yeah. Join us.) Also, by the way, if you join Agency for Mini, you get a lots of goodies. So just saying (Brad: True.) you've been thinking, "Oh, I want to coach with them," and you sign up for that. This is the time. So anyways, I'm so excited. September is, September, October are like going to be so ... (Brad: They're very so fun.) We're going to be like we're going to be in several states ... (Brad: It's gonna be a whirlwind.) It's a whirlwind.Brad Crowell  Yeah, it's gonna be crazy.Lesley Logan  Gotta get my sleep on. Anyways, we have an audience question.Brad Crowell  We do. You've answered this before, but it's been a long time. I just inserted that. What are some books that you recommend? Do you have any new ones?Lesley Logan  Yeah, so I don't recall which recap we answered this question. But I would say it's probably 100 episodes ago.Brad Crowell  I was gonna say, I think it's been like a long time.Lesley Logan  Yeah. So of course, I have been reading a lot. And by reading I mean listening. But I actually am reading a couple books like physical books. Currently, as we're doing this. So here's my new top books that I've been talking about a lot. And I've read it. There's they're not in, like, inclusive of all the books that I've read, but like what I think listeners of this show would really love. We Should All Be Millionaires, Rachel Rogers. Rachel Rogers, if you're listening this episode. Hi. Big fan over here. Want to be on the show? If you know Rachel, please do the intro. I'm just putting out there. I'm asking for it. I want I want Rachel Rogers on the show. That book is amazing. It's so good. I and Brad, love reading it.Brad Crowell  Yeah, we're I'm like, I don't know, third of the way through it right now. Halfway, I'm not sure.Lesley Logan  Yeah, it's so good. Chatter. I believe it is by Ethan Kross. I think that's who it's by. Yes. And I have DMed him, he has not responded to me. So I am not, (Brad: Ethan Kross.) I'm not rejected yet. And I will not take no for an answer from that man because he is amazing. That book is so it's so awesome at identifying why you're talking to yourself and the thoughts you say. And then also how to like snap yourself out of it, which I just frickin love. You know, I love action. So, Action Steps so that's a great book and then Rejection Proof. Oh my gosh, he did reject me for right now. Not permanently, he said to come back to him later. He's just not doing podcasts right now. That's okay. Jia Jiang, I got you. My peeps are gonna find you. We're gonna get you on the show. Anyways, Rejection Proof is so good. If you're afraid of being rejected. Brad has a course about being rejected (Brad: I do.) on our Profitable Pilates website.Brad Crowell  Yeah. We'll put the link to that in the show notes. (Lesley: Yeah.) It's called How to be rejected to success with 200 noes.Lesley Logan  Yeah, so and then this book was just like so so good. I'm really into it and then I've talked about it before actually talked about it with Coach Lee a couple weeks ago on that episode, but I started doing E-Squared again, and it's Pam Grout. Hi, Pam. Hi, hey girl hey. (Brad: Hey girl hey.) I tagg you on a post or three. Not a stalker, but just same (Brad: Big fan.) big fan, big fan over here. Anyways, um, I had I read Pam Grout's book, eight years ago, seven years ago, and I actually did one of the experience I put Brad's name now. And then he called me. (Brad: I did.) And then the other woman's name down, I just put the two together. She's the woman from the other company that's been hitting us up. (Brad: Oh, that's crazy.) How crazy is that? But she did also call me while we ran into each other. Anyways, you'll hear that on on Coach Lee's episode. But the point is, I've been doing all the experiments and I did the experiment one. I started on a specific date at 11am. And then I decided to meditate on like receiving abundance. And at 11:03 during the middle of my meditation, the experiment came through. Oh! So you all have to do E-Squared. Okay, those are the books. Do you have anything add to that?Brad Crowell  Those are, those are great. No, I've been reading political books, and also some novels. (Lesley: Yeah.) So yeah, less if you if you if you are looking to find a new world to experience that has nothing to do with reality. There's a lovely, incredible, 20 something books here series (Lesley: Oh, are you doing YA?) No.Lesley Logan  No, young adult, you're listening to a young adult?Brad Crowell  I don't know what that is. (Lesley: Oh.) So no, it's his name is Michael J. Sullivan. And he is a he's like a, he created his own fantasy world where he's got different, different times of the timeline. So like, you know, he started off, (Lesley: Oh) he started off with a thief and a soldier and the two of them get paired together and have to go to that. And he wrote, like, I don't know, 12 books around this. They're still out ...Lesley Logan  So not necessarily like a book for 20 somethings. It's just a 20 year long.Brad Crowell  No, no. He's written 20 novels. (Lesley: Yeah. Okay.) No, (Lesley: Sorry.) 20 books.Lesley Logan  20 books. So not YA at all?Brad Crowell  I don't know what YA is? So, no.Lesley Logan  YA is a ti... is like a section of books. It's called Young Adult. It's like your twilight ...Brad Crowell  Oh, yeah. I never I never got out of that. Yeah. (Lesley: Yeah.) No, it's a ...Lesley Logan  Like not goosebumps. But you know, something like that. Like ...Brad Crowell  I mean, sure, these are these are applicable for all ages, actually. The but but then, in that, in that timeline, he was referencing, you know, the history 3000 years ago. And then the next set of six books he wrote was from 3000 years ago. (Lesley: Oh, my God.) And then now the new books he's writing are in the middle, between these two timelines on a ... (Lesley: I can't handle it.) It's amazing, actually. And you fall in love with the characters and yeah, I mean, he is, he's mind blowingly good at what he does. It is incredible. The books are just fantastic. So (Lesley: Okay.) yeah.Lesley Logan  Let's talk about Lauren. (Brad and Lesley laughs)Brad Crowell  We don't go to the same movies, y'all. Just saying.Lesley Logan  We don't. We also don't go to bed the same time or wake up at the same time. We are an anomaly. If you are like, "I want to be married like Brad and Lesley." I'm just gonna go out right now you have to be very secured ...Brad Crowell  We have so much in common when it comes to being entrepreneurs.Lesley Logan  Yeah. And we ... like, like the things that we love to do for fun. Our so opposite. (Brad: Yeah) We just do them on our own.Brad Crowell  So, Lesley's got a green thumb. No, she doesn't.Lesley Logan  No, no. She doesn't. (Brad: I'm teasing.) But my Mammillaria by not touching it whatsoever is doing great. (Brad: Yeah, yeah.) My plant in the window. It's not doing so good. I don't know what to do about it. Anyway. Hi, let's talk about Lauren.Brad Crowell  Let's talk about Lauren Zoeller.Lesley Logan  All I can say is Lauren ... as like our guests listening to these recaps ...Brad Crowell  I know. They're probably, "What the hell?" (Lesley: When did they talk about me though?) Okay, cool. So, Lauren, helping women and men find conscious partnerships. Lauren Zoeller is a Somatic Relationship Expert, aka Dating Coach who overcame her own patterns of shame to now lead women into aligned lives. Lauren is more than a matchmaker. She's here to guide individuals to keep the relationships they find, and in the process, discover a deeper love for themselves.Lesley Logan  So aka better than a dating coach. (Brad: Yeah. Better than a dating coach.) Just to like, help my new friend out. She's more than a dating coach.Brad Crowell  Well, yeah, well, I think I think that, again, if you go back and listen to her definition of somatic, it will help you understand how different she is from you know, just, you know, she's not Hitch you know, I think you you probably had the best example, I'm just going to pull it back up. You said, people who date the quote on quote, "date the same person over and over and over again, until they learn their lesson." Right? She helps you, like understand why you might be repeating things, but just in a different time and a different with the different people. (Lesley: Yeah.) But you're still repeating the same thing.Lesley Logan  If you're watching us on the YouTube channel, you got the air quotes. If you didn't, Brad, his inflection should hopefully help you understand the air quotes are in there.Brad Crowell  Yeah, Brad is very good.Lesley Logan  It's better than Joey from Friends that air quote. I'm sorry. (Lesley and Brad laughs)Brad Crowell  What was one thing that you love that Lauren said?Lesley Logan  Thank you for asking. One thing I love that she said was "how you receive love as a child shapes how you expect to be loved today. Often those who had a frenetic childhood are chasing the high of chaos". And she went on a little bit like how do you give and receive love? And is it keeping you in unhealthy patterns is a question she's having (Brad: Yeah.) she's haveing you ask yourself. So take a moment. How do you give and receive love? And is it keeping you in an unhealthy patterns? So, you know, we all know The Five Love Languages and things like that. But like actually think about it like the way you're giving and receiving love. Is it actually helping you? Have loving relationships? Or is it in this chaotic, unhealthy pattern? Like these are important things. And then she also had some other examples like boredom as a driving factor and running from relationship to relationship to chase the high.Brad Crowell  Well, that's good. So so what she was talking about, which I thought was really amazing because I, I don't I never I never thought this way. But she said if you had chaos in your childhood, and actually she specifically was talking about helicopter parents. And she said, if your you know, parents were in, and then out and then in and then out and there was this chaos happening. You often expect that later on in life. So if you end up in a stable, you know, relationship, it doesn't mean stable is good or bad. It just means it's the opposite of what you expected. So more often than not, you're inclined to feel like, this is boring, or this is safe. Or this is kind of ... you know, and ...Lesley Logan  It's like when Carrie broke up with Aidan, everyone. She broke with Aidan because they didn't fight. And ...Brad Crowell  I don't actually know any idea ...Lesley Logan  Sex in the City. Everyone who's listening is knodding their head, we all know, because that was a big deal. There was a whole thing.Brad Crowell  So glad I wasn't there for that one. Okay. Yeah, it's like, guys, it's like, Oh, my God. It's like when Carrie broke up (Lesley: Stop.) with Aidan (Lesley: Okay.) because they didn't fight all the time.Lesley Logan  No, but it's I think people need examples sometimes ...Brad Crowell  I think it's a perfect example. I just was not there with you on that one.Lesley Logan  It's fine. Everyone who's listening is with me. (Brad: Yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.) They're all with me ...Brad Crowell  No, it's a perfect example because, you know, and then conversely, if you had a relatively stable, you know, or quote unquote, "boring", you know, like, like childhood love from your parents, and you find yourself in a chaotic relationship. You may be like, "I can't do this," you know. And anyway, I thought that was really interesting. I never thought about that before ...Lesley Logan  Yeah, yeah. And also, so first of all, Lauren has an incredible course. And she has a bunch of services. There was also the book, Getting the Love You Want, which is a very interesting book about explaining the old brain, the new brain, and like, how, when you first get a relationship, you fill all of your own holes. So ... (Brad: Harville Hendricks) Yeah. So you fill all your own holes to so people like look, "I'm this like, perfect, amazing being and there's nothing crazy wrong with me here. Don't like I'm so good. And your partner, by the way, is doing the exact same thing." And then after a few months, it's so exhausting trying to fill those holes. But you don't even realize that you're doing it on a subconscious level. So (Brad: Right.) you think that that person, the person you're with is filled the holes like they've solved the problem. So and then when both of you start filling your own holes, you're like, "You change. They change, blah, blah, blah." Actually no, you both just started to be your fucking selves. (Brad: Interesting) Yeah, and so a lot ...Brad Crowell  Well she does, Lauren talks about that, at the very beginning. She talked about like, you know, being lonely and filling that loneliness with someone who you know, you shouldn't be with.Lesley Logan  Yeah. Oh, totally. Who hasn't done that, (Brad: Yeah) like 17 times not personal. Just, I just know, I'm still I'm watched. But I think it's like, it's ... (Brad: Calling you in behalf of a friend.) Yeah, calling for a friend, actually. Anyways, it's a great book, if you're like, "I don't know, if I'm gonna read the book." He was on Oprah. And you can like get the Cliff's Notes version, or you can just work with Lauren. But the reality is, is like, we have to stop pretending that how we were raised is um not affecting the lives and the choices we have now. And then also we have to understand that like we are making choices. You may think things are happening to you. And this is just the people that are around you. And these are the only options but we all actually have choices and when you start to recognize that like how you are choosing to give and receive love is a choice. (Brad: Sure.) Even if you feel it's subconscious, it can actually be a conscious decision. When you make those changes, you can actually start to change the patterns of the day you have and find the person you want to have and look at Lauren, look where she's at right now.Brad Crowell  Yeah. Interesting. Wow. Yeah. And what she's referencing is having moved through a very tumultuous time in her life to finding a place where she can be herself. (Lesley: Yeah.) With someone that she loves in a business that's functioning and all good things. (Lesley: Yeah.) So again, worth listening to. One thing I loved that she said, was she helped define the difference between a therapist and a life coach. (Lesley: Which I knew you would love.) Yeah, well, she is a life coach, therapist, generally speaking, has degrees in therapy, and they, you know, like help you dig into the past. Right. And so you're really breaking things down and trying to uncover, you know, where you came from. Whereas a life coach is helping you plan and look at your future. And I thought that was such a clear distinction, such an easy way to understand the difference between the two ...Lesley Logan  I knew you love it. (Brad: Yeah, that was great.) I was like, "Oh my gosh, Brad's and I fucking love this definition." And also, by the way, you could have a somatic therapist, (Brad: You can.) life coach, (Brad: Yeah.) and so you, like somatics is really amazing. Again, if you like, "What's somatic?" Listen to the other episode, just gonna make you do it. But you can have both and like, you can also have a therapist and a life coach, because one could be dealing with one thing and one you could be doing. (Brad: 100%) So you know, just that there are different things. But I loved how she explained it. I agree with you on that love.Brad Crowell  Yeah. All right. So finally, let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your conversation with Lauren Zoeller? She summed it all up with one, one solid action BE IT action item. She said, look at the patterns that have shown up in your relationships, and write them down. Why has every relationship ended? And is there a common thread?Lesley Logan  Yeah, and I think you can look at friendships, as well as in family relationships, as well as love relationships. Like I think like, you know, we're not, we are different, with different people ish. But we all kind of wrote this thing. So like, if you look at how you how maybe a family member and you had a falling out, or a friend you had falling out, I bet you there's some common threads. And I think that can be worth journaling about. I'm not saying shame and judge all yourself, please. That's not what I'm saying ...Brad Crowell  But it's still a hard thing to dig into and look and review. And, you know, I mean, I think that it's easy to avoid. Let's just say it can be easy to avoid thinking about this stuff. (Lesley: Oh yeah) So when you start to uncover it, it may be a little bit uncomfortable. You know, because if you're honest with yourself, you know, how much a part of the ending of those relationships where you? Obviously, it takes two people to be in a relationship. So you were clearly a part of it. How?Lesley Logan  Yeah, and I think like, it's not like we're saying you should take all the blame, because that's not it at all. (Brad: No) But you should just actually look at like, what was your role in it? And like, if you're like, "Well, listen Brad, my person cheated on me." Okay, that's fine. I do not blame anybody who was cheated on, like as the reason for that, because that's a whole other ball of wax. But you can look at the red flags, that you ignored at the begining of the relationship that (Brad: Yeah) got you in relationship with someone who cheated on you. (Brad: Sure.) And there, and so you looking at those red flags that you ignored, those are choices. And you made those for specific reasons. (Brad: Yeah.) And there's nothing wrong with the choice you made. But then you can actually have this like, red flag marker. So when you're on a date, and you see that red flag and you go, "Oh, here I am with the same pattern of dating this person who is doing this out of spite..." (Brad: Exactly. Yeah.) And one thing, put a stop sign up. But you get to say, "Hey, you know, you said something. I just would like to go back to that. And just kind of explore that a little bit. (Brad: Yeah) Could you mind like, like, just give me a little bit more from that." And if they like dig a hole that's just like, wow, that's red flag just became a frickin fire, run. (Lesley laughs) (Brad: Yeah) Run away.Brad Crowell  Yeah, I mean and it may be, I mean, there's, you know, in a yet last steps, so we were talking about or so in our last recap, we're talking about clients and firing a client. Same thing, I mean does, we're not necessarily talking about love relationships here. We're talking about relationships, right? So it could be you keep taking on clients that you, you know, I don't know, maybe, you know, we teachers, as a teacher, we all feel like we can help someone, but maybe we think we can help them emotionally in addition to physically and maybe that is like consistent issue. Because after a while you're fried, you're ready to move on to the next person, but now they're your client, you know, and it's possible that you've been doing this over and over again. You know, who knows? There's just a It's interesting to go back and take a look. And like what what Lauren said, look at the patterns that have shown up in your relationships and write them down. Why has every relationship ended? And what is that common thread?Lesley Logan  Well, I'll be really honest. Like we would not have dated had I not like looked at the red flags and like been playing that game. And like looking at how all of the people I dated before you ended, I was like, "Oh, wow, there's a common interesting theme." And so when you came on, like, I challenge you a couple of times, like, ... you relate to something I said, "That doesn't, I don't like that doesn't work for me." You know, and like, we had to talk about it. So like, it's not like, if you see it, you're like, "I have to run away right now." No, you can actually have a conversation around it, (Brad: Sure.) and then like, say things and it really does allow you to have an adult relationship where yes, there's vulnerability. But what ...Brad Crowell  I don't even think I asked you like things, you know, in that sense, I, I actually, I don't, I didn't have a plan when I was going through my divorce. But I did write things down. Because I couldn't keep it in my head anymore. I just couldn't juggle it all. Because it's so much as thinking about, you know, it's like replaying every conversation I ever had, ever. And, you know, you know how it is, it is right, and but what it allowed me to clarify, were the things that were important to me. And so when I went when we began to date, I literally had a list. I actually ...Lesley Logan  I had a list. I had a list. I deleted my list after you dumped me because I was so mad at you. Because okay, so he came over with beer, and I'm fucking gluten free.Brad Crowell  Oh, I did that.Lesley Logan  And he came over with beer. This is not the first time I told him I was gluten free. This is the third time I had to tell him I'm just gluten free. And he brings us beer like, "Hey, I brought this beer." I'm like, "I'm gluten free. I can't drink it." And he's like, "Oh, yeah, that's right." And then he proceeded to take two hours of telling me everything he liked about me, and then why we couldn't go on a date. And I had this list and you checked off everything on the list, but I literally had written out remembers I'm gluten and dairy free. And I was like, "Fuck this list. It's not fucking working. I he meant everything and he fucked this up and he fucked that up." And I deleted the list. And then 10 days later, you're like, "Hey, I'm at Trader Joe's. I know you're gluten and dairy free. So I got you some veggies and hummus." I'm like, "Are you fucking kidding me right now?"Brad Crowell  You know what? You know what I did. I actually went home and looked up. What is gluten free? Because I didn't know. You were like, "Yeah, I can't eat bread." I was like, "Oh. Well, okay, I guess she can't eat bread." So I didn't bring bread. But I actually looked it up. I was a dairy was pretty straightforward.Lesley Logan  Yeah. (Brad: But gluten that I didn't know.) and Yeah. But that's if I didn't know you had a list. I have, I have a list anyways, obviously it worked out for us. But it's because you both ... reflected on past relationships and how they ended. (Brad: That's pretty funny.) And hey, I'm so happy we're together. We're celebrating seven years this fall. (Brad: What? That's crazy.) Yeah. Anyways, I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell  I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan  Thank you so much for joining us today. First, I'm grateful you're here. I hope you enjoy these. You can always give us feedback on our podcast at beitpod.com/tellme and we want to know how you're going to use these tips in your life. Give us a tag, tag @laurenzoeller. Let us know and please share this with a friend who is having needs in their relationships that need to be met. (Brad: Yeah.) So we can help them out with Lauren's amazing tips and we'll catch you in the next episode.Brad Crowell  Bye for now.Lesley Logan  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day! 'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.Brad Crowell   It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli. Lesley Logan  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing. Brad Crowell  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all videos each week so you can. Brad Crowell  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Looking for love but constantly finding yourself in the same repetitive relationships that leave you heartbroken and searching for more? Lauren Zoeller, a Somatic Dating Coach, joins today's conversation to uncover why we find ourselves dating the same people and how to finally discover secure love. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co . And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:What is somatic experiencing and how does it play into relationships? The survival response to the loneliness How do you give and receive love & is it keeping you in unhealthy patterns? The energetic vibrational frequency of emotions and how it plays a role in attraction.3 pillars to break the dating cycle: recognizing the dysregulated nervous system patterns, healing the patterns, and manifestation. Understand how you self-sabotage.The peace found in not questioning life changes. BIOLauren Zoeller is a Somatic Relationship Expert, speaker and podcast host. She has achieved overwhelming success in helping high performing, female executives attract a dream relationship and a life they crave. She is the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a cutting edge coaching program that teaches female visionaries how to find aligned love and co-owner of SHIFT with Sanctuary™, an elevated inner circle for the 1% woman who is ready to step into sacred leadership, divine love, energetic longevity and her abundant legacy. Lauren's own story of overcoming deep shame has led her to advocate for women to own their story, use their voice and step into an aligned, vibrant life. She is now the President and CEO of the Balanced Boss Company, LLC, as well as the founder and host of The Aligned Love Podcast. Lauren has been featured in international publications such as Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Total Beauty, Thrive Global, Goalcast, Money Inc., Healthline, Greatist and more.Episode References/Links:Follow Lauren on IGLauren's Website  If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.Be It Till You See It Podcast SurveyResourcesWatch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!Lesley Logan websiteBe It Till You See It PodcastOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley LoganOnline Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTubeProfitable PilatesSocial MediaInstagramFacebookLinkedInEpisode Transcript:Lesley Logan  Hey, Be It babe. How are you? Oh my goodness. Okay, so I have, she's just an amazing woman for you right now. So a really, really, this is going to be an episode, I really hope you share with all of your female friends, actually, you can share with your men friends, too. You can share with any friend who is you see them struggling to have just amazing conscious love, and be in relationships that you know, fully meet them and support them. And it's an it's mutual. And it's amazing. And you know, it's not not that like everything is about who you're with, because it's not that you have to love yourself. So even if you're like, "I don't want, I'm happily single, I don't want to be with anybody." You have to love you. And there are things that we were taught when we were younger, that really affect how we love ourselves and how we seek out love. And I really like you can't be it till you see it if you don't love yourself or if the love that you're in isn't fully supporting you. You just can't. If you are a married person and your love and life, I still want you to listen because I think there's some amazing things, some reminders, some confidence boosters, you're gonna get some ways to pat yourself on the back. And also, I know you got friends who need to hear this episode. So, I wanted to listen to it so you can give it to them. And then make sure that you're celebrating you. And you're being kind to you this week, I think, I think it'd be really easy to forget all that you've done, all that you do, and all that you are and only see the things that you're not doing things so well and what's not going right. And I just want to remind you that you're doing an amazing job, and you're an awesome, awesome person. And so now, here's Lauren Zoeller.Hey, Be It listener. What is up? I have Lauren Zoeller here and this girl and I had a like a zoom date because of mutual friends that we have both who've been on the show Amber Shaw and Tori Gordon, you have to go listen to their episodes. And it was really funny becuase one those days I was like, "Who is this call?" But I, like, "Who am I talking to today?" And she came on and we hit it off like kismet like friends from like another life. And I had to have her on because what she does in her life and what she does in her business is something that I know every single person actually wants, they want they want, you want to feel loved, you want to feel like you're seen and you're important, and you're heard. And so anyways, I can't wait for you to meet her. And so here she is Lauren, can you tell everyone who you are and what you're up to these days?Lauren Zoeller  I sure can. I'm so excited to be here. So for those of you who are listening and haven't met me, my name is Lauren Zoeller. I am a dating and somatic dating and relationship expert. So I really help women and men find conscious partnership and find a way to actually keep it when they do find it. So I work all with the nervous system and how we have all of these patterns that we have been recreating since childhood and they are stuck in our body. And they actually keep us from finding that sense of deep, deep love that we yearn for. (Lesley: Okay) So that's a little bit what I do.Lesley Logan  Okay, I love all this dating and relationship coach, I think that people are like, yep, understand, you know, got that. The somatic part that you mean, like do a little deep dive into what that is? And then also I can't I really do want to make sure we talk about like the keeping it part because a lot of people are good at getting the date. And it's ... (Lauren: It's like keeping it.) Yeah.Lauren Zoeller  Yeah, yeah. So I am trained in somatic experiencing, which is looking at the nervous system and the way that the nervous system holds on to trauma in the body, and how that trapped trauma keeps us from deep love for ourselves and deep love for others. So somatic experiencing is just, it's therapy of the soma, which is therapy of the body. So so often, we'll go to therapy, and we'll do a lot of cognitive work. So we'll do CBT, we'll do brain spotting, we'll do EMDR. And it's very cognitive, which means you can look at a pattern, or you can look at something toxic. And you can say, I know that this isn't good for me. But your body has a different story. And even though your brain can label something as toxic if your body experienced trauma, which we can talk about trauma and the actual definition of trauma here in just a minute. But if it's if it experiences trauma over an extended period of time, your body goes into a survival pattern. And it will seek out that survival pattern over and over. Even if your brain is saying wait a second, this isn't right. Your nervous system will take over and hijack your brain. So if we're not looking at the body. And if we're not looking at the nervous system, which is what somatic experiencing does. This is why we continue to create patterns. And we don't, we can never find a way out ...Because this is like ... (Lauren: we aren't looking at the body) you keep dating the same person. Yeah. So sorry. You keep dating the same person. (Lauren: Yeah) Like it's like when you're like you keep I know, this is the wrong person, man, just keep doing it. It's like like, and you get frustrated with yourself like you think it's you like there's something wrong with your brain, or there's no one with you. And it's really that you just actually have to release that trauma from the body so that you can experience what your brain knows at once.Exactly, exactly. And I, the example that I give all the time, and most women can relate to this because they've been in this position at one point in their life. It's the man or woman that you know, is so bad for you. Like it's one that you gossip with your girlfriends about. And you're like, "Oh, I know that this person is horrible for me." But yet, it's Friday night, and you're lonely. And you're feeling a little down on yourself. The next thing you know you wake up in their bed Saturday morning. (Lesley and Lauren laughs) Right. (Lesley: Yeah. Yep, did that.) I know. We all did. We all did. And we'll continue to do it if we don't look at the way that the body holds on to that need for someone else to fill that wholeness inside of ourselves. And it comes down to a survival response. It's actually a trauma pattern. So the body but the brain knows it's wrong, that the body hijacks the brain and sends you to his bed because you need that hit. You need that high. Your nervous system needs that high. So,Lesley Logan  Yeah, that's yeah, so fascinating. And took me down memory lane a little bit. So, (Lesley and Lauren laughs) I tell the story because we brought when people asked like, you know, like, how did I meet Brad and it kind of goes back to like this one time that I was sitting on this couch, in this house that was my house with this partner that I was with for five years, and I'm looking at this 80 inch screen TV, 80 inches y'all, it's freaking huge. And the living room was one of those long living rooms. But the way the couch was the TV was on the short side. So like you're like in the screen and it was like 180 degrees of windows in this house. It was like beautiful views, but it's 111 degrees. So you're like a lizard in a terrarium.. So, I'm laying on the towel on a leather couch. It's not mine, looking at an 80 inch stream TV. Watching, He's Just Not That Into You. And I'm like, "I don't think he's that into me." And it was this weird moment. And then I was like, "Am I into him? Like, what are we doing here? What is happening?" And it was weird thing and I, I didn't. So my brain figured it out. And I left but it took, it took a lot of therapy and a lot of stuff to get to where I could like, "Stay away." I had to, I had to, like (Lauren: Yeah) literally go homeless so that I would not live there. Because like, if I live here, I'm gonna end up staying in this relationship.Yeah, yeah. And so in your body is conditioned. Right. And it's, it's used to finding that safety, in that chaos of this person that isn't able to fully commit to you. It's like we our bodies, we call it chaos, and we call it toxic. But it's actually extremely brilliant. It's our body's way of keeping us safe. But it's a false sense of safety. (Lesley: Yeah.) Right. It's not security and it's not, it's not this stable relationship that you're really yearning for. It's this false sense of safety that your body's seeking. But yet, it's not what you actually desire for yourself.Yeah, yeah. So okay, how did you get into doing this? (Lauren and Lesley laughs) Because I feel like that, that's not something that you're like, "When I grow up, I'm gonna, you know, be a somatic coach for relation..." Like you know what I mean, like, that's a lot (Lauren: Yeah) for a five year old. So like, what, what started, what started you on this journey?Lauren Zoeller  Well, to put it nicely, it was my train wreck of a dating history is really what led me here. But it was so much more than that. And I'll give you kind of the cliff notes version. But I had been, I started coaching about eight and a half years ago. And when I made my way into the coaching world, I was working with other coaches and entrepreneurs, helping them build and scale their businesses with heart. I had this, this company, and I do that kind of like weird voice because it was just my pitch line, right. And I had this company and this program called Balanced Boss Academy. And I had The Balanced Boss Podcast, and I had this whole business that was built around how to balance your entrepreneur life with living an actual life, right? And it looked like if you follow me on social media, it looked like I had the best life in the world, like on the outside, looked like I was traveling the world, I had this perfect relationship with this man who was this big to do man in Nashville looked like I had these incredible friends. It looked like had the picture perfect life. And what people didn't understand was that on the inside, I was actually a complete train wreck, complete train wreck. And my breakdown, and my rock bottom moment came. It was one day. And it all happened, like everything came crashing down and in less than 24 hours, and I, it consisted of three phone calls. I woke up on Saturday morning, and the first phone call that I received was from my boyfriend at the time, I had been dating for two years from his mother. She was calling to let me know that he was going to rehab for the sixth time in one year.Lesley Logan  Oh, my God. How ... (Lauren: Yeah ...)how did he have the time or to do that six times?Lauren Zoeller  Right. Right. Right. And everybody thought that we had this perfect relationship and nobody knew. Right? Nobody knew that he was an alcoholic. So it was a whole facade in and of itself. The second call that I received was from my accountant, who told me that we were $30,000 in the red. And he was dropping me as a client because he had no, he was like, "I have no idea. Like your business model isn't sustainable. I have to drop you as a client, because I don't know how you're gonna pay this."Lesley Logan  Oh, my gosh, what a jerk? (Lesley: Right) Could have told you before you're 30,000 in the red.Lauren Zoeller  $10 of the halt, right. So that was call number two, and then call number three and mind you this happened within a 24 hour span. Call number three was from my doctor telling me that I potentially had cancer. They had a biopsy that came back that was cancerous. (Lesley: no) So in a matter of 24 hours, this complete facade that I was trying to uphold, came crashing down. I had no relationship. I had no business really. (Lesley: Yeah) My health was in the shitter (Lesley: Yeah) and I I didn't know what to do. I was like, what? Excuse my language but like, "What the hell? I am a coach. I'm, like, immersed in all this mindset work. And I'm doing all this therapy. And I was positioning myself as this expert that could help people balanced life and work. And I couldn't do it." (Lesley: Yeah.) So I started looking for answers. And I started digging around and really getting real with myself, like, "What is going on? Like, what are these patterns that keep showing up?" And that is when I stumbled into my first somatic session with a somatic therapist. I found somatic therapy, I had a friend that had told me about it. And it was the missing piece for me. So I started to unravel and understand that even though I was just like I spoke about, I was able to recognize that things weren't right in my life. My body was telling me a different story, and I wasn't trained in how to listen to it. (Lesley: Yeah.) So somatic experiencing opened everything for me. And the result, after years of working with it, with a trained somatic therapist, and doing a lot of reparenting work, and a lot of the work that I now lead women through. The result of it was I realigned my business and went from $30,000 in debt to making 30k in one month. I found an aligned partner, who was a dream, who was not addicted to anything, and was secure. (Lauren and Lesley laughs) I realigned my business and helping and serving in a way that truly was in alignment with my heart. And I eliminated the cancer scare, which was pretty amazing.Lesley Logan  That's amazing. I know everyone's like, (Lauren: completely limited ...) "What happened at the quest?"Lauren Zoeller  How, how, yeah, yeah. Like it just, it went away. And then I found amazing, amazing women that just started to kind of fall into my life like you, and Amber, and Tori, and Carrie, and just this really supportive, fantastic group of women and friends that are everything that I always wanted, I really stepped into alignment. So it was the missing piece for me.Lesley Logan  So, thank you for sharing that whole story because I think that people go, "Oh, she went from a coach to being a somatic coach, there's just a certification." And like, really, like, all and also, so many people are like, "Oh, my God, I'm so sorry, that happened to you." And it's probably and you're probably like, I don't know, for me, I'm like, I'm so happy that happened to you. Because like, (Lauren: Yeah) you wouldn't be who you are right now, you wouldn't ... Like if only you lost was just the boyfriend, you probably would still be doing what you were doing. You know, like, if all your or if all you had was like just the debt, you probably would have kept the other two things like you or you wouldn't have put the things all together like it all had to come crashing down for you to actually go, "What am I going to do here?"Lauren Zoeller  Yeah, yeah. Well, because, and I think that this happens often with people when they get into the coaching business. It's like, "I want to be a coach." But they haven't really overcome a lot of what they need to overcome in order to properly coach someone through what they're going through. And so I really had a wake up call, I think you're absolutely right, I had to go through that complete rock bottom because I would have kept doing mindset work. I would have kept going to talk therapy, I would have just kept doing what everybody says to do. (Lesley: Yeah) But it wasn't getting me anywhere. So it's like it all had to come crashing down in order for that to realign.Lesley Logan  Yeah, and I, you know, like, if you're listening to this, and you're feeling like you're at your rock bottom, like I'm not like, I'm not like, I'm not saying I'm like, "Whoa, go you." But I am. But I think if you can accept that, and you look around you instead of going why is this happening? Like so if you're like, this has all happened to me, well is me. It's like, why is this happening? Like, go on that curious journey and, and try to figure it out. You, I mean, I didn't have a cancer scare. But I definitely like left the ex. And so I was homeless. And then a month later, I'm back to the house to pick up something. And when I was leaving, I totaled my car. (Lauren: Oh) So, I like head on collision. I had to call him to get me to the hospital, like all this stuff. And then I found out a week later the place that I rented space closed and I had no place to take my clients, which is like where a majority of my income came. And I was just like, "Okay, well, where are we going to live? And what are we going to drive and where are we going to work?" And all of it led me to like really figuring out like, what are like what are like, like, this is a fuck yes. This is what we're doing. (Lauren: Yeah) Ditch like, I'm not doing lukewarm things anymore. And so yeah, I think like, I am so grateful for that moment for me. And so when I hear about people, I see the other side. It's like that was like the best thing could have happened for you, you know. So okay because someone heard at the beginning when you're like and stay in these relationships. So what what is it about like, what is the thing where we can get into them, but then we can't always keep them and should we want to keep all of them like what's how do we decipher that too maybe that's like 17 questions, butLauren Zoeller  Yeah, well, it depends, right? It depends on what the dynamic was that you learned, either in past relationships or as a child in how you give and receive and hold onto love. Right. So I'm just going to give you kind of a high level example. If you were raised in chaos, as a child, if you had helicopter parents who were in and out, like, sometimes they were there, sometimes they weren't. Sometimes they showed you affection and love. Other times, they were just mad at you, because they were having a bad day. Right. And you have this inconsistency and emotional availability, then what we usually see is that as an adult, if chaos isn't present, if there's not fighting are really high highs and really low lows. You feel bored. You feel like relationship, like the relationship doesn't have any quote unquote, "passion." But it's only because and I say this all the time that children raised in chaos, are triggered by peace and safety. Right. So this is one example. There's so many different ways that trauma (Lesley: Yeah) can show up and recreate itself, right. But most of the time, the reason people can't hold on to secure love is because they feel like it lacks passion, or it's boring, and nine times out of 10, that's because you experienced chaos and your nervous system in printed that love equals chaos. And so when that chaos isn't present, your nervous system is used to that, to that chaos. And so you feel like it's boring, when in essence, it's actually not boring. It's just that you are used to chaos. So you run from relationship to relationships, and you can feel that high (Lesley: Yeah) all the time. Right.Lesley Logan  This is, this is so fascinating. I can think of like 17 friends on my whole life that like, I'm like, "Oh, that person needs to hear this. And this person needs hear this. My mom. Hi, mom." (Lesley laughs) And so um, so that's, that's amazing. Because what you're what you're saying as a coach is like, it's not just about us helping you find... And I think this is like relationship coaches that like find people to mate like I when I taught in LA and I had these in person clients, they were like, getting out of these dating coaches are those you know, I don't know what it's called anymore, but like just lunch and like then other people (Lauren: Yeah) like, set you up for the dates (Lauren: matchmakers ...) matchmakers that's it. (Lauren: Yeah.) But they're like, they're not able to actually help you keep the relationship going. And so what you're able to do is like, let's figure out what's going on inside of you. Let's unravel that, so that you can actually keep the person that you really did fall in love with for reals, that you're just (Lauren: Yeah) sabotaging not like on purpose, but because of what your patterns are that are imprinted in you. Lauren Zoeller  Exactly, exactly. And there's, and I don't usually get to this until I've worked with someone for a while. But if you follow Dr. Bruce Lipton, he talks all about energetic vibrational frequency of emotions. If you're living in a heightened trauma response for an extended period of time, chances are you're living in shame, anger, guilt, fear, which are lower vibrational frequency emotions, which means that if you've never looked at your childhood patterns and the way that you love and were taught how to give and receive love, and then there's a lot of shame and guilt, and fear and anger and sadness around the way that you receive love. If we look at Dr. Bruce Lipton's work, he says that every emotion has an energetic vibrational frequency associated with that. So, and this goes, this is kind of like leading into manifestation a little bit and (Lesley: Yeah) attraction a little bit. If you're not looking at those patterns, and you're not actively doing the work to understand them and heal them, then you're going to be vibrating at that energetic vibrational frequency, which means you're going to be attracting people who have your same wounds. Right. So if we just take away even all the patterns, and dissecting the patterns, and we just look at the emotions of associated with some of these trauma instances in our body, of course, you're not going to find secure love because you're vibrating at that state. And that's what you're going to attract because like, attracts like. (Lesley: Yeah) Right. So you got to be able to do the work so that you can also shift the way that you call people into your life, which is kind of a missing piece a lot of people don't talk about.Lesley Logan  Yeah, so you brought up manifestation and I think a lot of people go, "Oh, manifestation. Yeah, I thought about it. I wrote it down. I did the secret like you know, I put it in the universe." But I, I think that manifestation also can... can also, you can also manifest and also take some action and there can be, it can be a little bit more than this amorphous thing that we do. How does that work in your your work and how does that work in like relationships and attracting and bringing in the person that we want to have?Lauren Zoeller  Yeah. So I'm a firm believer that man... manifestation work, okay, an I want to put this because it's so, so deep. I teach manifestation work and I teach attraction work at the end of working with someone. It's actually the third pillar of my program and what I lead women through. The reason being is because in the first pillar, we understand your patterns. So we get really clear what are your patterns, we go back through your past relationship patterns, what I call your core stories of limitation, which are your trauma moments, your childhood and generational dynamics, it really clear on the dysregulated nervous system patterns that are present for you. And the second pillar, we heal them we go through a lot of somatic experiencing to shift your nervous system. The reason that I don't go over manifestation and attraction until the end is because if you are manifesting and you're putting out into the world what you want, and you're just letting it be, but you don't actually truly believe at your core level that you are worthy of receiving what you've asked for. You will sabotage what it is that you want. (Lesley: Hmm) That that sabotaging comes from your patterns. Right. (Lesley: Right.) So it's like if you haven't done that work, the re parenting work to understand how you self sabotage or how your nervous system is dysregulated it doesn't matter how many things we put out into the universe, you're gonna hijack those bad boys.Lesley Logan  Right. So it's possible that people are out there manifesting and then sabotaging every time the universe is like, "Here's the thing you wanted. Here's the thing that you wanted." (Lesley laughs)Lauren Zoeller  Yeah. Yeah. And, and you see that cycle of at least it was for me, like, you may manifest it, but it may go away as soon as it shows up. Right? You can't hold on to it, which is the same thing with love.Lesley Logan  Yeah. Oh, my goodness, it's so fascinating how all of this kind of works together. Because I feel like what you do, even if someone listen to this, it's like, "I've got the man I'm with or the person I'm with. The human I want to be with." But the other stuff isn't there. Like, it's like, okay, somehow you made that work. And we still have work to do (Lauren: Yeah) on these other areas. I feel like, I feel like, I don't know, maybe our life's work is just getting to know ourselves and re parenting. And then, and then trying to do the best we can with all of that information. So Lauren, you, you now have someone that like, great relationship, you're loving it, you're doing this job. How, you know, what were the was there any hesitancy when you're switching careers? And you're like, "Okay, this is what I'm going to do now?" Because I don't know, maybe it's just me and what I'm thinking but like, I always go, "What if like, but I failed at this. And so I won't be good." You know what I mean? Like the history of it, like kind of cloud what you think is your potential? Was it easy for you to make the switch? Was it hard for you? How did you like do that without holding yourself back?Lauren Zoeller  I would say that I switched. I mean, if we go back back, like before I even started coaching, I owned a yoga studio. And like I've had all I feel like I've had all these different lives prior to where I am now, which is crazy. And up until this shift, like up until really diving into and understanding somatic work, and stepping into dating and relationships. I was always hesitant. I was like, "Ah, I don't know if this is gonna work." Like the thing before it failed. And the thing before it failed and everything else failed. I always had this hesitancy and I will say this and I truly mean this from the bottom of my heart. Since doing this deeper somatic work and really understanding my worth and knowing me really deeply. I've never questioned it. It's the first time that I've never questioned it. It's just felt so right. And that doesn't mean that it's it hasn't shifted and changed and things haven't fallen apart and rebuilt themselves. But there's always just this deep knowing that I'm exactly where I need to be which has never been present before.Lesley Logan  That I totally understand. I totally because I think and maybe hesitancy isn't what I felt but like I felt like, "Who am I to do it?" I had questions like, "Is it gonna work? What if it doesn't work?" Like there's all these things and then and then I would kind of do it anyways but always holding myself back and playing smaller I think than I should like if (Lauren: Yeah) I look back they all worked out because it was supposed to but like I, I was like waiting for the like someone to deem it fine, you know ... (Lauren: Yeah) like say and you're you're doing a great job and you're doing a great job. And it wasn't until like my little my own rock bottom moment that I didn't question the apartment I chose. I didn't question like, this is where I'm gonna have my my clients. I didn't question when I met Brad. I was like, "I'm gonna married that man." He didn't have my phone number y'all and also was still married, so. But I was like, "No, we're gonna be married someday. I'll wait till he's ready." And I didn't question our move to Las Vegas either like those things. And so now when I questioned things, I'm like, "Why am I questioning this thing? What is what is it about this thing that I'm questioning?" Versus ... Do you know what I mean? Like, it's like a different (Lauren: Yeah) way of looking at it. It's more of a sign like, (Lauren: Yeah) what is this over here? Why are we looking at it as a distraction? Like, what is or do I have work to do? So thank you for sharing that because I, I think a lot of people listening to this, probably have done the same thing and all of this stuff. And then when they don't question it, they also are kind of like, well, then that's almost like, too, it's almost too easy. Like, (Lauren: Yeah) it should be harder than that. (Lauren: Yeah) There's a negotiation process I have to do. So (Lauren: Yeah) what so now you've made the switch. You're doing this, I know, you're in the process of moving and everything to what is it that you are kind of being it till you see it right now? Like, where are you going with, like, what's your next thing that you're trying to grow into?Lauren Zoeller  So I truly my life's work is to get this work into as many people's hands as possible. Truly, I want everyone to be able to experience deep, deep love from the space of a balanced nervous system from security. So, I am in the process now of writing a book. So my book will hopefully be out by this time next year, which is really exciting.Lesley Logan  Oh, my God, you're writing a book? Yes. Yes. This is amazing.Lauren Zoeller  Yes, yeah. So I'm very excited about that. And just continuing to spread the message. I have a program called The Aligned Love Collective that has been going strong now for almost two years. And we enroll 20 to 30 women in it every month. And it's changing lives. So it's just a matter of getting this message to more people and getting the book out and doing some speaking.Lesley Logan  Have you ever written a book before? Is this your first book? (Lauren: My first book.) That's amazing. I want to go back to the first book because I didn't know what I didn't know. And now I know. (Lesley an Lauren laughs) And now I know.Lauren Zoeller  That's what I hear from everybody.Lesley Logan  Yeah, yeah. Oh, my gosh, we'll have to have you back when the book is done. We'll have to talk about the whole process and, and just let people know when it's out. Okay, we're gonna take a quick little break. We're gonna edit that out everyone. I don't know how this dog got in here. It's like he was he was called in. Yeah, he called it okay. We're gonna take a quick break, and then we're going to find out how you can hear about do your course and follow your podcasts in just a second.All right, Lauren, where can people find you, follow you, do the work with you? What do you got?Lauren Zoeller  So you can go to my website, laurenzoeller.com. I'm also most active on Instagram and TikTok. So you can follow me on Instagram at @laurenzoeller and on TikTok at @coachlaurenzoeller. And it'll give you if you go to the website and visit the Instagram will give you everything that you need ...Lesley Logan  Amazing. Amazing. Okay, we asked everybody how some BE IT tips. So bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action steps they can take to be until they see it. So what do you have for us?Lauren Zoeller  So I my first tip would be if deep committed partnership is what you want to find. And I'm just giving this to you from a dating and relationship side of things. Look at the patterns that have shown up in your relationships and write them down. Why has every relationship ended? What is the common thread? And then go back and answer this question. How was I taught to give and receive love as a child? That's the first question. Second question is, what version of myself did I create to receive love from my parents? And use these two questions and compare them against the relationship patterns that you have found out and he will know so much about how you show up in relationships and use that as your jumping point to start to go deeper into yourself about what may need to shift and what may need to heal so that you can have deeper partnership.Lesley Logan  Oh, oh, I love this so much. I can't wait to hear what people discover. So you all how are you going to use these tips in your life? Lauren and I want to know. So screenshot this episode, tag us on Instagram and TikTok. I'm also on there. I'm being it until I see it on TikTok. That's where we're like that's my be at moment right now. I'm like, "I'm just gonna figure this out this elder millennial is showing up." (Lauren: I love it.) So how are you use this tag us, share it on on Instagram and wherever else you do so that other people can hear this especially if you are listening to this and you're like just love us and you're like happily married. Send this to your single friends that you are like so tired of the patterns that they're going through. If you truly love them you want them to have love like you do, then you send them this episode. You can just text it to them that way. It's going to be great. So thank you so much and until next time, Be It Till You See It.That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day! 'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'. Brad Crowell  It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli. Lesley Logan  Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.Brad Crowell  Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan  Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all videos each week so you can. Brad Crowell  And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.Transcribed by https://otter.aiSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/be-it-till-you-see-it/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Carla and Sherry share hilarious Zoom fails and the unexpected silver linings from working online over the last two years.  Then, they take a Love Fix question from a friend who thinks it's time for her friend to get married.  What are the red flags in this question and in this situation, and is marriage as important as finding the right life partner? Then, they welcome Lauren Zoeller, CTA certified relationship coach, motivational speaker, and podcast host. She has achieved overwhelming success in helping high performing, female executives attract a dream relationship and life they crave. She is the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a cutting edge coaching program that teaches women how to attract love and Balanced Boss Academy™, a learning platform that teaches online coaches how to build and scale a business with heart. Lauren talks about how she incorporates ventral vagal work into her coaching, how trauma can affect everyone differently, and how to release toxic energy and sit with your biggest emotions.   What You'll Hear In This Episode: Lauren talks about somatic experiencing and how she uses it to coach her clients through trauma and the early childhood experiences that keep them stuck in toxic relationships.  Do people who keep picking emotionally unavailable partners have a more anxious or avoidant attachment style?  The importance of learning how to sit with the big emotions so that you can first have a healthy relationship with yourself.  Why you need to stop fooling yourself- and others- into thinking that you've got it all together.   Find out how to connect with Lauren, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, break-ups, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.  Toxic people and narcissists are addicted to the manipulation that fills their self-worth cup.  Two ways to calm yourself in the interactions leading up and on a first date.  Mastering the ventral vagal state in your nervous system allows you to respond the way you really want to in any situation.  There's no one traumatic event that is more severe than another, and every brain responds to trauma in a different way.  How to know if therapy, psychotherapy, or coaching is what you need now.  Connect with Us! The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast Become a Member — Codependency Special — Wake Up Recovery — $1 trial membership Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group The Love Fix Relationship Quiz   Sherry Sign up for one of Sherry's coaching or psychotherapy packages here: Sherrygaba.com/addiction-recovery/sessions-psychotherapy/rates-insurance   Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. Relationship-quizzes.com   Carla Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp   Sign up to be in TDR database: https://www.threedayrule.com/CarlaRomo   Lauren Zoeller Website | Instagram | Facebook    Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.   Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

Today on Expand I'm joined by special guest, Lauren Zoeller, who specializes in working with high performing, female visionaries utilizing her expertise in somatic healing to help them step into a space of sacred leadership, divine love, energetic longevity and abundance. Together, Lauren and I cut to the core of why we face so much misalignment on the path to creating success on our terms...and how regulating your nervous system can play an integral role in releasing what no longer serves you so you can reclaim the rejected parts of yourself that actually hold the key to your fulfillment. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurenzoellerTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@coachlaurenzoellerFree Masterclass: https://www.laurenzoeller.com/ata-masterclass/Email List: https://www.laurenzoeller.com/

The way we connect and have relationships with people is strongly based on whether our nervous system is regulated or not. The regulation of our nervous system, on the other hand, is strongly based on old unhealed traumas that may have happened in childhood or just weeks ago. These wounds manifest as relationship insecurities and problems when we are adults, and most people simply don't know how to address it. In this episode of The Wellness Revolution, Amber speaks with Lauren Zoeller. Lauren is a Somatic Relationship Expert who helps people deal with tough situations in relationships through managing their feelings and calming their nervous system. Lauren explains the 4Fs of common nervous system reactions: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn. Each one guides us on how we will respond to anxiety inducing moments. Tune in! Wellness Quote “When your nervous system and your brain are not aligned with one another, you're going to constantly self sabotage in your romantic relationships and in any dating situation that you're going to be in.” – Lauren Zoeller Key Highlights Lauren explains what is a somatic relationship coach, telling a little bit about her own story and background and how she started this career; Lauren explains that the first step to start having sane relationships is identifying what doesn't feel good in the relationship; What is anxious attachment and what are the common actions and thoughts of someone who has it? Some inner child wounds can manifest as relationship issues in adulthood and the first step to change this is being aware of it; Lauren explains the 4Fs (fight, flight, freeze, fawn) and how to regulate our nervous system in order to get better results in relationships; Lauren gives the listeners tips and strategies to implement when having first dates, getting to know someone for the first time, or using dating apps. Related Links Happy Days by Gabrielle Bernstein About Lauren Zoeller Lauren Zoeller is a Somatic Relationship Expert, motivational speaker and podcast host. She has achieved overwhelming success in helping high performing, female executives attract a dream relationship and a life they crave. She is the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a cutting edge coaching program that teaches female visionaries how to find aligned love and co-owner of SHIFT with Sanctuary™, an elevated inner circle for the 1% woman who is ready to step into sacred leadership, divine love, energetic longevity and her abundant legacy. Connect with Lauren Website: www.laurenzoeller.com Instagram: @laurenzoeller Facebook: Lauren Zoeller YouTube: Lauren Zoeller About Amber Shaw Amber is a Body Transformation Expert, Founder of The Wellness Revolution, motivational speaker, and NBC Health and Wellness Coach. Having built a lifestyle that allowed her to embrace work, children, exercise, and well-balanced eating habits, Amber now works with helping and coaching women to achieve the same level of serenity and empowerment through a sustainable way of living. Connect with Amber Instagram: @msambershaw TikTok: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com Facebook: Amber Shaw FREE Guide on Intermittent Fasting: ambershaw.com/fasting

Lauren Zoeller is an CTA certified Relationship Coach, motivational speaker and podcast host. She has achieved overwhelming success in helping high performing, female executives attract a dream relationship and life they crave. She is the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a cutting edge program that teaches women how to attract aligned love and Balanced Boss Academy™, a learning platform that teaches online coaches how to build and scale a business with heart. Lauren's own story of overcoming deep shame has led her to advocate for women to own their story, use their voice and step into an aligned, vibrant life. She is now the President and CEO of the Balanced Boss Company, LLC, as well as the founder and host of The Balanced Boss Podcast, a show that interviews high achievers who are following their dreams and staying healthy in the process. Lauren has been featured in international publications such as Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Total Beauty, Thrive Global, Goalcast, Money Inc., Healthline, Greatist and more. She lives in Nashville, Tennessee with her sweet Persian cat, Ellie. When she is not coaching, you can find her traveling, speaking and leading workshops to promote her ultimate message of living a healthy, successful, life. https://www.laurenzoeller.com/Become a soul professional: https://www.soulprofessional.com/ #SoulProfessional #NLBP #CamilleLMiller

We're crushing week two of women's history month with another incredible female guest: fellow nutrition and fitness coach, lash artist, and podcaster: Abby O'Sullivan. Abby is on a mission to help women step up and into their own incredible power through health coaching, and truly understand that self-care is healthcare. In this episode, Abby details her entire fitness and wellness journey: a total departure from the lash artist who partied to decompress on the weekends, to a gym newbie who overcame nerves, imposter syndrome, and a lack of self-esteem. And fast forward to present day--a fullblown wellness coach who is mentoring women to take care of their minds, bodies, and spirits. We tie Abby's own mental and emotional transformation through fitness to the evolution of her coaching business over the past 18 months. We discuss: - the challenges of working in the service industry - how and why beauty professionals and service professionals become workaholics - the importance of operating from a place of alignment - why you really need to trust your intuition - her experience with relationship coach Lauren Zoeller - how a total commitment to self-development naturally reshaped her business - dating--the weird and funny stories, and the good guys out there To connect with Abby, give her a follow on Instagram: @coachabbyo. And be sure to subscribe to her podcast: Crushing with Abby O, available anywhere you listen to your podcasts. Fill your coffee cup, sip away, and get your FYX of Coach Krysta on The FYX podcast. Lynk up with Krysta on all of her social channels: @thekrystahuber @thefyx.officialpod @fyxstudios Visit Krysta's website for more information on her nutrition coaching formula, The Fitness FYX: www.thefitnessfyx.com. Create accountability in your life by taking the first step: talk to a qualified nutrition coach who actually gets it. This isn't another quick fix program--it's THE FYX. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thekrystahuber/message

My next guest Lauren Zoeller is a Somatic Relationship Expert, motivational speaker and podcast host. She has achieved overwhelming success in helping high performing, female executives attract a dream relationship and a life they crave. She is the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a cutting edge coaching program that teaches female visionaries how to find aligned love and co-owner of SHIFT with Sanctuary™, an elevated inner circle for those who is ready to step into sacred leadership, divine love, energetic longevity and her abundant legacy. She is now the President and CEO of the Balanced Boss Company, LLC, as well as the founder and host of The Balanced Boss Podcast. Lauren has been featured in international publications such as Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Total Beauty, Thrive Global, Goalcast, Money Inc., Healthline, Greatist and more. When she is not coaching, you can find her traveling, speaking and leading workshops to promote her ultimate message of living a healthy, aligned life. In this episode, we dive deep into how to build resilience after trauma in the year 2022. Website: www.laurenzoeller.com  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@coachlaurenzoeller IG: instagram.com/laurenzoeller    Book a FREE 45 min 1-1 Coaching Session with Raj Montage Contact:  Rajmontage@protonmail.com     IG: https://www.instagram.com/on_call_empath  https://linktr.ee/oncallempath   Disclaimer-This podcast's subject matter, which contains sensitive medical and mental health issues, is for entertainment purposes and does not constitute medical, legal, or any other type of professional advice. If you have any health concerns, please see a doctor or medical professional. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/oncallempath/support

In today's episode of The Coachable Podcast, Lauren Zoeller and I dig into what it takes to have a long lasting and fulfilling relationship. From healing and commitment to exes and intimacy, we figure out what it takes to have the relationship you desire. Reclaim Your Voice [3:45]“Relationships are truly the greatest gift we've ever been given.”“Commit to yourself and reclaim your voice.”Reflect What You Desire [12:10]“Your single-ness or discontent in relationships is due to core wounds that haven't been brought to light and healed.”“You are a reflection of what you are attracting into your dating life.”Take Responsibility For YOU [18:35]“The only thing we truly have control over is the way we feel at any given time.”“How someone responds to your truth is not your responsibility.”Our Ex Relationships [24:25]“If someone is bashing an ex, it's showing that they haven't taken responsibility for the relationship ending and healing that in themselves.”“It takes two people for a relationship to not work.”“The way you speak about an ex is a reflection of the healing work you've done.”Intimacy and Growth [27:00]“After 60-90 days, hormones can settle and you can get to really know someone on an intimate level before sharing the most sacred act of intimacy with someone.”“Don't utilize sexuality as a weapon.”“The key to intimacy and deep alignment is vulnerability-being able to speak your voice and be transparent.”Love Language Connection [35:30]“Intimacy is so much more than the act of sex- deep intimacy can't come without emotional, mental, and spiritual connection.”“Open communication and vulnerability creates intimacy.”Downfalls of Relationships [39:10]“The downfall of relationships is people not wanting to have that additional conversation within themselves and also with their partner to say, ‘this is how this makes me feel'.”“Another downfall: One person is willing to put in the work and the other person is shutting down.”Put In The Work For YOU [46:09]“There is a right or wrong when it comes to neglect of self-the minute you start to discount yourself and the experiences you're feeling, you need to separate from the other person. You are NOT responsible for their feelings.”“Embody the example, don't shame your partner into doing the work.”Commitment vs. Interest [54:03]“An aligned partnership has very little to do with what you're doing and everything to do with who you're being.”“When you're interested in something, you'll do it when it's convenient. When you're committed to something, you'll do whatever it takes.”Stay in touch with Lauren:Website: https://laurenzoeller.comInstagram: @LaurenzoellerTiktok: @CoachLaurenZoellerApplied knowledge is power. Execution will always create greater results than theory. And execution starts with your psychology. In this training learn how to maximize your potential, create incredible results and beat the competition, even if it's just the clock without burning yourself out. Here's the link to my FREE training, The Secret to Sustainable Success: https://torigordon.com/the-secret-to-sustainable-success 

One of the many things we're loving about life after lockdown is that LOVE IS BACK, BABY! So many people are jumping back into the dating world, but we've also heard from lots of single friends that they're feeling a little apprehensive or unsure of how to get back into it all after over a year of isolation. In our recent Instagram polls about dating, 47% of you said you're a litttttle nervous to get back into dating post-Covid, too, and lots of you have had less than ideal experiences on dating apps. Navigating love and the dating world in 2021 ain't easy, so we called in love and relationship coach, Lauren Zoeller, to answer all of your burning Qs, and give us the advice that everyone needs to hear, whether you're newly single, have been on the market for a while, or are in an open relationship.  Lauren is a CTA certified Love & Relationship Coach, motivational speaker and podcast host. She helps high performing, female executives attract the dream relationship and life they crave, and she's the creator of The Aligned Love Experience™, a coaching program that teaches women how to attract love. She's been featured in international publications like Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Thrive Global, Money Inc., and more. Believe us when we say love is her language!Tune in as we chat about:@yunggillianaire & @cailynmichaan's biggest lessons from the dating worldThe lowdown on which apps are best for your wants and needsHow to meet someone IRL vs. on the appsTools for bouncing back from bad dating app experiencesThe inner work we all NEED to do to show up as our best selves3 non-negotiables you should be setting from the get-go when datingConfidence boosters to get you feelin' good as hell going into a date Tips for setting boundaries early on when dating and why that's *actually* sexyHow to deal with rejection and what to do if you're ghostedGood questions to ask on a first date to build connectionWhat you should consider if you have a “type” you only dateRed flags to look out for on apps and during a dateLauren's hot tip to successful dating in 2021We hope this episode helps you get back out there, date with confidence, and pursue the love that you deserve!For show notes and more adulting tips, visit:teachmehowtoadult.caSign up for our monthly adulting newsletter:teachmehowtoadult.ca/newsletter Follow us on the ‘gram:instagram.com/teachmehowtoadultpodcast Follow Gillian:instagram.com/yunggillianaire/Follow Cailyn:instagram.com/cailynmichaan/Follow Lauren:laurenzoeller.com/instagram.com/laurenzoeller/

00:00 Your big news stories of the day 14:00 Lauren Zoeller with online dating trends post pandemic

This episode is with the amazing Lauren Zoeller who is a Love & Relationship Coach, guiding high performing female executives in attracting a dream relationship and life they crave. This one is packed with insights and practical takeaways to make any or your relationships better and why "balance is bull$it".Connect with Lauren on her website at https://laurenzoeller.com/ and on https://www.instagram.com/laurenzoeller/After the episode, be sure to connect with your hosts at:http://www.livingaheadpodcast.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LivingAheadPodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livingaheadpodcast/Kelly:Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kelly.moser.180Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kelly_moser_/Shay:Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/shay.alsa.54Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shayalsahhar/Until then, KEEP LIVING AHEAD!Music: https://www.purple-planet.com

Episode 14 of Living and Leading with Emotional Intelligence: Burnout with Lauren ZoellerIn this episode, we will speak with Lauren Zoeller about the importance of effectively managing stress so it does not lead to burnout. "Lauren Zoeller is an CTA certified Life and Business Transformation Coach, E-RYT 200, motivational speaker and podcast host. She has achieved overwhelming success in helping high achievers ditch burnout, find purpose and make money to live the life of a #BalancedBoss.Lauren is the creator of the Four Step Transformational Mindset Process™, a cutting edge coaching system that elicits lasting change to overcome burnout and avoid a misdiagnosed clinical disorder, and Balanced Boss Academy™, a learning platform that teaches entrepreneurs how to build and scale a business with heart.Lauren’s own story of overcoming depression and anxiety has led her to advocate for a balanced approach to life and business. She is now the President and CEO of Lauren Zoeller Coaching, as well as the founder and host of The Balanced Boss Podcast, a show that interviews high achievers who are following their dreams and staying healthy in the process." (Source: https://laurenzoeller.com/about)Get in contact with or to learn more about Lauren:Website: https://laurenzoeller.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurenzoeller/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lzoellerYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuUitahJx92u57rdXIUL0DgLearn more about you host, Brittney-Nichole:Websites: www.catalyst4change.com; www.generationeq.orgFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/brittney.connor2321LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/brittney-nichole-connor-savarda-2b5737137/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bncs_23/Book: https://www.amazon.com/EQ-Deficiency-Emotional-Intelligence-Compassion/

Are you a coach or a business consultant or maybe planning to start your own own coaching or consulting business? We have some pointers that could help you build your business and save you time and money. You might be wondering how and where to start.  It is not easy, but listen to today's Podcast as we have a returning guest, Lauren Zoeller sharing 4 Ways To Build Your Coaching Or Consulting Business with Mike Yanda & Bobby Hoyt.

This week on The Balanced Boss Podcast, I (Lauren Zoeller) am interviewed by my best friend/sex guru, Christin Henke. In our time together, we chat about everything from my original life plan to my deepest fears in life. Christin joins an incredible group of previous Balanced Boss Podcast guests in which I want to give a huge THANK YOU! This world is full of entrepreneurs working to keep their life in balance, and I've interviewed some of the best! I hope you enjoy this very intimate TELL ALL episode, and make sure to visit Lauren's Instagram page for a chance to enter the Balanced Boss Podcast Celebration giveaway for 10k+ worth of LIFE CHANGING GOODIES from our previous Balanced Boss Podcast guests! About the guest: Lauren Zoeller is an CTA certified Life and Business Transformation Coach, E-RYT 200, motivational speaker and podcast host. She has achieved overwhelming success in helping high achievers ditch burnout, find purpose and make money to live the life of a #BalancedBoss. Lauren is the creator of the Four Step Transformational Mindset Process™, a cutting edge coaching system that elicits lasting change to overcome burnout and avoid a misdiagnosed clinical disorder, and Balanced Boss Academy™, a learning platform that teaches entrepreneurs how to build and scale a business with heart. Lauren's own story of overcoming depression and anxiety has led her to advocate for a balanced approach to life and business. She is now the President and CEO of Lauren Zoeller Coaching, as well as the founder and host of The Balanced Boss Podcast, a show that interviews high achievers who are following their dreams and staying healthy in the process. Lauren has been featured in international publications such as Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Total Beauty, Thrive Global, Goalcast, Money Inc., Healthline, Greatist and more. Lauren lives in Nashville, Tennessee with her sweet Persian cat, Ellie. When she is not teaching or coaching, you can find her traveling, speaking and leading workshops to promote her ultimate message of living a healthy, successful, balanced life.​ About the host: As a writer, podcaster and activist, Christin has made it her mission to create safe, judgement-free spaces for women to tell stories, examine their fears, and eradicate shame. Her podcast, Nothing Confidential, focuses on normalizing the conversation surrounding female sexuality and removing the stigma attached to past traumas and our unapologetic pursuit of liberation, pleasure, and embodiment. In this 50th TELL ALL episode, Lauren shares: - What led her to coaching - Big lessons learned from previous entrepreneurial endeavors - Why yoga was a catalyst for major change in her life - Her sexual awakening + deepest, darkest fears - Self Care non-negotiables that are a "MUST" Follow Christin: Instagram: @christin.henke + @nothingconfidential Website: Nothingconfidential.com Podcast: https://link.chtbl.com/nothingconfidential Follow Lauren: IG: @laurenzoeller Website: laurenzoeller.com Love? Make sure you comment and subscribe below! --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thebalancedboss/support

This week's show is a bit different and EXTRA FUN because I had the incredible honor of turning the mic around on my friend, Lauren, for the 50th episode of her show, The Balanced Boss Podcast! And since I asked her every question under the sun, I thought it would make a great #askingforafriend segment (only 3x longer. Haha.)! Enjoy

There are plenty of benefits to working in the corporate world, but some people feel they aren't given the chance to grow at the pace they desire.  On the other hand, there are some who have already risen to the top with a fat salary, however, still feel something’s lacking… And they start to ponder what if they start their own business? Joining Bobby and Mike in today’s episode, is a CTA certified Life and Business Transformation Coach, a motivational speaker, and a podcast host, Lauren Zoeller. She is also an advocate for a balanced approach to life and business. So if you’re thinking of ditching the corporate world to become an entrepreneur and want to find out the transformation process then go ahead and hit that play button!

Life Coach Lauren Zoeller sits with us to chat about life, her transition from being an artist to being a life coach. She also explains the concept of Yoga to us. 

Jen McCarter, third time guest, talks about her upcoming Re.Treat in Turks and Caicos, hosted by herself and life coach and yoga teacher, Lauren Zoeller. Jen and Ariana talk about what finishing her RYT (Registered Yoga Teacher) 500 means for her practice and classes. Then of course, as always, things go off the rails and they follow some great conversational rabbit trails.

Lauren Zoeller and I both whole-heartedly believe in the alchemy of active choice orientation, but to get there we have to recognize our own victim/blame mentality. Lauren shares how she got out of her own way, but only once she realized that she was ostracizing those she loved by her own “this is happening to me” internal dialogue. She thought everyone was against her and soon realized she was the common denominator.  Lauren’s own story of overcoming diagnosed depression and anxiety through natural solutions after life crisis has led her to advocate for a non pharmaceutical approach to life. She is now the President and CEO of Lauren Zoeller Coaching, as well as the founder and host of The Balanced Boss Podcast. A show that interviews high achievers who are following their dreams and staying healthy in the process. Lauren has been featured in international publications such as Prevention, Shape, Business Insider, Total Beauty, Thrive Global, Goalcast, Money Inc., Healthline, Greatist and more. Lauren Zoeller is a CTA certified Life Management Coach, Wellness Expert, Motivational Speaker and podcast host . She has achieved overwhelming success in helping burned out, high achievers shift their viewpoint and find an alternative approach to crisis management. Lauren is the creator of the Four Step Transformational Process™, a cutting edge coaching system that elicits lasting change to overcome burnout and avoid a misdiagnosed clinical disorder.  Lauren digs into the awareness required to dig into your relationship with victim/blame, vulnerability and whether or not you find yourself consistently complaining. Leveling up requires deep self awareness and the ownership of your own “stuff.” Lauren lives in Nashville, Tennessee with her sweet Persian cat, Ellie and teaches yoga at multiple studios in the Nashville area. When she is not teaching or coaching, you can find her traveling, speaking and leading workshops to promote her ultimate message of living a healthy, unmedicated life.  I love Lauren’s outlook and the way she helps us understand our relationship with ourselves, those we love and her admonition that we “feel the feelings.” Never forget that your connection to others will always be more important than the grind and the goals. Thanks Lauren for the reminder that there is no space for fear to live when we are guided from a place of love. You can connect with Lauren on her website www.laurenzoeller.com, on Instagram @laurenzoeller, and on Facebook at facebook.com/lzoeller Catch this week's episode of Gold With Jeanette Schneider Episode 28: Own Your Stuff: Healing Victim/Blame Mentality with Lauren Zoeller As always, please subscribe to this podcast, leave a review and don’t forget to share with your friends. I’m always interested in content that uplifts, so if you have things you’d like to hear about, please share them with me in the comments. You can also find me on Instagram @ms.jeanetteschneider or Twitter @msjwrites. If you want some help moving toward that intentional life, join me every week on my intention journey. I’m inviting you. Totally free. From my heart to your inbox. Sign up for my love notes at jeanetteschneider.com and before you even wake up on Monday mornings there will be a huge dose of motivation waiting for you. Yes, I will wake you up on Monday morning with intention setting prompts and give you some tips as to what is setting my soul on fire. On Fridays I’m going to remind you to let go, recharge, and love yourself up with some self care prompts to get present in your down time. Intentional living is where it’s at, y’all! Until next time – in the words of my grandma, “Love each other every day.” In your ears, filling your heart. Xo, J

Ever wonder what all the HYPE is with morning routines? Well, in this episode we unpack just how crucial having a morning routine is to the overall success of your work day. Work-life balance coach and yoga instructor, Lauren Zoeller walks us through her top secret magic formula that will transform you from a stressed out and tired professional to a zen-like superstar. - Lauren helps individuals find work/life balance for increased happiness and heightened performance. She brings life balance to the overworked professional and equips them with the tools they need to re-fill their cup. She believes that EVERY aspect of life is meant to be lived, not just your work. Connect with Lauren on:  Her podcast: The Balanced Boss podcast Instagram: @laurenzoeller Facebook LinkedIn

Lauren Zoeller, a CTA certified Life Management Coach, Wellness Expert and E-RYT 200 has achieved overwhelming success in helping people achieve their mind, body and spirit goals. Whether she is working one on one with clients, facilitating one of her workshops, speaking to a group, or teaching yoga, Lauren has the ability to open hearts and minds to enable her clients to become the best version of themselves. Lauren helps her clients, embody unwavering confidence, gain clarity on their heart’s purpose, access full abundance in every area of one’s life, and receive a greater sense of health on a physical, spiritual, mental and emotional level. In addition to her coaching, Lauren teaches private, corporate and studio yoga and is the co-owner of Phoenix Yoga, a 200-hour teacher training program. She has been teaching dance and yoga for 13 years and incorporates clean living and fitness in all of her programs. Lauren is a brand ambassador for Defiance Fuel, Yoga Club Box, doTERRA, Let's Get Checked and AMPD Nutrition, all programs, and products that work in partnership with her lifestyle philosophies.

For Session 64 I was joined by the female version of me – Lauren Zoeller. She is a true powerhouse who does all the things. She’s a yoga teacher, a coach and a podcaster.We talk about pouring from an empty cup. This is something I’ve struggled with the past year where I felt like I kept on giving until I almost burnt myself out. Lauren gives great advice on how we can only care for others by caring for ourselves first, otherwise, we will just burn ourselves out and end up running on empty.I loved her emphasis on getting a morning routine of self-care that is specific and works for you. It’s something I’ve put a lot of effort into and starting the day right with a bit of self-love can make a huge difference to not only you but those around you.Learn more about Lauren:Lauren’s website See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Let's talk about our basic life force -- our breath. Today, we're breathing deep with Lauren Zoeller, a Nashville-based yoga instructor and certified work life balance coach who helps high achievers find holistic balance in their lives and careers. Lauren knows that when we learn to breathe better, we can perform better in our professional and personal lives. In fact, it turns out that just five minutes of deep breathing can reduce stress levels by 75 percent. That's a pretty high ROI for a busy professional with a full plate of responsibilities! So let's take control of our lives, one breath at a time. Shall we?Listen in and learn: How breath is connected to your natural fight-or-flight stress response How deep breathing can stimulate healing, regeneration and detoxification in the body How to tap in and recognize when you're breathing from your chest instead of your belly How to control your breath instead of letting breath control you How to incorporate a simple two-minute breathing practice into your morning routine You can find Lauren on Instagram at @laurenzoeller and learn more about her FREE 5-Day Mediation Course at www.laurenzoeller.com. And, don't forget to grab free your episode worksheet to put Lauren's wisdom and breath work into practice.

** Soul in the Raw is a podcast for adult, as such the language will reflect that.**   Lauren Zoeller is aWork-life Balance Coach, Yoga Instructor, & Motivational Speaker. Lauren brings holistic balance to the overworked professional. Her coaching practice equips high achieving individuals in finding work/life balance for increased happiness and heightened performance.   In this episode we discuss: How recurring stories from your past keep you stuck Realizing when it’s time to nurture yourself Knowing your limits Using Yoga & Meditation to give your mind a break The Art of Surrender   We can’t wait to hear your takeaways, so don’t forget to leave us a review! Until then, sit back, relax, & we’ll see you on the inside!   To connect with Lauren further, make sure to follow her on Instagram @laurenzoeller and visit www.laurenzoeller.com !   To connect with us further, follow us over on Instagram @soulintherawpodcast and www.soulintherawpodcast.com !

Living The Dream with Travis BartonMonday Nights 8/7cJoin Travis as he has an epic chat with another awesome guest - LAUREN ZOELLER!Lauren Zoeller is a registered yoga instructor and certified life coach. Specializing in helping you find out what you are missing in your life, that is keeping you from living to your fullest potentialSo plan to join us Monday Night 8pm ET!"Proving your dreams can become epic realities!"This show is brought to you by:The Speaking to the Heart Radio Network!speakingtotheheart.org

Living The Dream with Travis BartonMonday Nights 8/7cJoin Travis as he has an epic chat with another awesome guest - LAUREN ZOELLER!Lauren Zoeller is a registered yoga instructor and certified life coach. Specializing in helping you find out what you are missing in your life, that is keeping you from living to your fullest potentialSo plan to join us Monday Night 8pm ET!"Proving your dreams can become epic realities!"This show is brought to you by:The Speaking to the Heart Radio Network!speakingtotheheart.org

Living The Dream with Travis Barton Monday Nights 8/7c Join Travis as he has an epic chat with another awesome guest - LAUREN ZOELLER! Lauren Zoeller is a registered yoga instructor and certified life coach. Specializing in helping you find out what you are missing in your life, that is keeping you from living to your fullest potential So plan to join us Monday Night 8pm ET! "Proving your dreams can become epic realities!" This show is brought to you by: The Speaking to the Heart Radio Network! speakingtotheheart.org

Lauren Zoeller is a certified Life Coach and a Yoga Teacher and her ultimate message is self care. As a 12 year old, Lauren was told she was different and that no-one would like her. She was taller and more mature than her friends and because of unkind words, she lived in a constant state of unworthiness and felt like she was never good enough.   She craved acceptance and found it in performing, where she could take on a story other than her own. This led her into depression, addiction and anxiety, which she was able to heal through yoga and endless amounts of self-love.   In today's episode, we talk about How she overcame depression and you can, too How a simple sign on the street changed her life forever Why your emotions don't define you Her best body love exercise that changed her self-hate into self-love How to use the power of intentional language to get what you want from life   And so much more!   You can find the full show notes here: martinafink.com/podcast/35  

For our 12th episode, I had the pleasure to sit down with Lauren Zoeller. Lauren is a yoga and meditation teacher, and she’s also a Whole Living Life Coach. We really connected on the importance of self-care when looking for growth in our life and on the idea of whole living. Today we sat down and talked about what does it means to be a life coach and how has yoga has influenced her on that path.As always, I really appreciate your support. So as you leave a review on iTunes or on your iPhone podcast app, you automatically enter a giveaway. Once more Athleta is supporting this podcast in their effort to ignite a community of strong women who lift each other up, and is giving out a 75$ shop card! If you're not sure how to leave a review, check this article.ABOUT OUR GUEST​​Work-life Balance Coach. Yoga Instructor. Motivational Speaker. Lauren brings holistic balance to the busy professional. Her coaching practice equips individuals in finding work/life balance for increased happiness and heightened performance. Lauren believes that yoga, meditation, and proper self care can give anyone the balance they need to take ownership of their body, believe in themselves and live a happy life. In addition to her coaching practice, Lauren teaches yoga at multiple studios in the Nashville area and co-leads 200 hour Yoga Teacher Training Courses with Phoenix Yoga Teacher Trainings. When she is not teaching, you can find her traveling, speaking and leading workshops to promote her ultimate message of balance and self care. Find more about her here:Her WebsiteIG : @laurenzoellerFB : @lzoellerFree 5 Day Meditation Course: http://www.laurenzoeller.com --> Scroll to bottom to enter courseMention this podcast when you sign up and get 20% off sessions with her!QUESTIONS SHE ANSWERED DURING THIS EPISODE :Can you tell us a bit more about yourself and how you found yoga.What’s the parallel between teaching yoga and being a life coach? Before becoming a life coach, you started by seeing one right? Why did you seek coaching? How did that help you move forward in life? You’re still seeing one now?Why did you later decide to become a life coach? Why are you on this path? How does a session look like? How is what you do different from therapy?Can anyone become a life coach? What does it take?What are your intentions as a coach, what are your goals? What do you believe in? What’s your definition of success?On your website, you say : You have a story, it’s meant to be told. Why do you think telling our story is important? How does telling your story has helped you?How do I know if coaching is right for me? Any tips for people to choose the right person for them? How can people know if the sessions are working for them? / What are the keys to having a successful coaching experience?I would like to finish with a few journaling questions for our listeners. Can we make a list of questions you would ask clients? See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Today Lauren and I discuss her near misdiagnosis of PCOS, MTHFR genetic mutation, body image, and what self-care and self-love really looks like! Website - laurenzoeller.com  FREE 5 Day Meditation Course - https://laurenzoeller.lpages.co/free-5-day-meditation/ 8 Week Find the Missing Piece Course - laurenzoeller.com/program

Shemekia Copeland (Somebody Else's Jesus); Etta James (Champagne And Wine); Diana Braithwaite and Chris Whiteley (Champagne Blues); Eric Bibb (Champagne Habits); Jimmy Rushing (Pink Champagne); Lauren Zoeller and Bluze Lightning (Right Track); Freddie Spruell with Washboard Sam (Ocean Blues); Hi Henry Brown (Titanic Blues); Katie Bradley (Damn Your Eyes); J.B. Hutto and His Hawks (Married Woman Blues); Frankie Lee Sims (Married Woman); Big Joe Duskin (Slidell Blues); Tom Doughty (Your Picture Has Faded); 24 Pesos (Did Your Daddy Wrong); Cash Box Kings (Ain't No Fun When The Rabbit's Got The Gun).

This week is chock-full of practical nuggets as we welcome somatic relationship coach Lauren Zoeller to the pod. Together, we break down her nervous-system-based approach to coaching and even do some group exercises that you can follow along with at home. We're all feeling a little less anxious after this one!But first, Ali & Erica are reporting live from Vegas.Ali shares a non-update update on The Roommate and Erica continues her vacation mentality.Where to find Lauren: On Instagram @laurenzoeller and at her website laurenzoeller.com.Timestamps: Lauren joins us at around minute 20.If you'd like to hear our personal updates before everyone else as well as other exclusive content, join The Search Party on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight . And, if you want to send in a "weird or nah" suggestion, share your own phone throwing moment, ask a question, or have general feedback, you can do it all at www.findingmrheight.com/podcastThanks to this week's partners:Sunset Lake CBD: For 20% off all products, go to sunsetlakecbd.com and use code FMH20.ZocDoc: Go to Zocdoc.com/FMH and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Many are available within 24 hours.Drizly: Download the #1 alcohol delivery app today by visiting Drizly.com. EveryPlate: Get started with EveryPlate for just $1.49 per meal by going to EveryPlate.com/podcast and entering code fmh149. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy