Podcast appearances and mentions of irvin yalom

This week we have been exclusively watching 'Magic Mike', shaking a Magic 8-Ball and listening to '24k Magic' by Bruno Mars (which is just awful) in order to win the slightly nervous attention of Adam Ferrier, founder of Thinkerbell; the thinkers, tinkers and practitioners of ‘measured magic'.  A psychology brain sat on top of some sturdy strategy bones, Adam is a rare voice of reason in the largely barmy brand world – as well as being the chief sceptic when it comes to the industry obsession with ‘the customer'. He's also the author of more superb books, including ‘The Advertising effect: How to Change Behaviour' and supplements all this talk-talking with some serious walk-walking through his work that brings marketing science and creative thinking together.  In this episode Adam shares his expertise on brands who forget how to be brands, why every business problem is a behaviour change problem and the forgotten benefits of simply fitting in. This episode is very proudly dedicated to Anne Young.    /////    Follow Adam on LinkedIn Timestamps 09:16 - The impact of D&AD annuals on Adam's career choice 11:19 - Transition from forensic psychology to marketing 16:12 - The perils of customer obsession 22:57 - Balancing brand and customer needs 25:11 - The importance of consumer research Adam's Book Recommendations are: Stop Listening to Your Customers by Adam Ferrier: The Advertising Effect: How to Change Behaviour by Adam Ferrier:  Love's Executioner and Other Tales of Psychotherapy by Irvin Yalom:  Existential Psychotherapy by Irvin Yalom:  Here and Now: Tales from the Heart  by Irvin Yalom:  /////

Passer de la recherche opérationnelle chez Air France au poste de CTO chez Acasi, c'est jongler entre maîtrise technique, management de l'humain et vision du produit. Mathieu nous raconte son parcours, entre défis, remises en question et apprentissages.Dans cet épisode, on parle aussi de création de contenu sur LinkedIn et du podcast de Mathieu : Tronche de Tech. Un échange sans filtre sur l'évolution d'une carrière dans la tech et la manière de faire grandir une équipe.————— MATHIEU SANCHEZ —————Retrouvez Mathieu :Sur LinkedIn : https://www.linkedin.com/in/matsanchez/Sur son podcast Tronche de Tech : https://shows.acast.com/tronche-de-tech————— PARTIE 1/3 : PARCOURS —————(00:00) Intro + présentation de Mathieu Sanchez(03:34) Recherche opérationnelle chez Air France(09:15) Le déclic de changer de boîte(14:17) Enseignements de l'expérience chez Air France(20:41) Transition d'Air France à Yuso(24:56) Software Crafter chez Yuso, SaaS pour apps de VTC(32:07) Déclic : rendre le code plus accessible pour les autres(35:50) Recommandations de lecture(42:09) CTO chez Acasi, outil d'expertise comptable en ligne(49:08) Premiers enjeux après la prise de poste en tant que CTO(57:02) Assurer la montée en compétences de l'équipe junior(01:02:45) Perdre 9 mois de recrutement(01:15:33) Culture d'entreprise : la vision de Mathieu(01:24:20) Challenges de la double casquette CTO / CPO(01:35:20) Évolutions sur le plan humain et émotionnel(01:41:58) Ce que Mathieu préfère dans son métier aujourd'hui(01:44:41) Être une figure d'influence sur LinkedIn(01:50:12) Le processus de Mathieu pour créer du contenu accrocheur(01:57:13) Tronche de Tech : le podcast de Mathieu————— PARTIE 2/3 : ROLL-BACK —————(02:08:53) L'échec de Mathieu avec une collaboratrice(02:14:43) Les leçons qu'il tire de cette expérience(02:17:24) Où placer le curseur entre exigence et bienveillance————— PARTIE 3/3 : STAND-UP —————(02:19:11) Langage SQL : trouver la meilleure façon d'exécuter une requête(02:28:03) Ce que Mathieu aurait aimé faire plus tôt dans sa carrière(02:30:32) Recommandations de lecture (partie 2)(02:33:17) La prochaine étape pour Mathieu————— RESSOURCES —————Les livres recommandés par Mathieu :Clean Code - Robert C. Martin99 bottles of OOP - Sandy Metz, Katrina Owen & TJ StankusDomain-Driven Design Distilled - Vaugn VernonElegant Objects - Yegor BugayenkoThinking in Bets - Annie DukeDiscovery Discipline - Tristan Charvillat & Rémi GuyotDifficult Conversation - Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton & Sheila HeenShutter Island - Dennis LehaneLe Jardin d'Épicure - Irvin Yalom————— 5 ÉTOILES —————Si cet épisode vous a plu, pensez à laisser une note et un commentaire - c'est la meilleure façon de faire découvrir le podcast à d'autres personnes !Envoyez-moi une capture de cet avis (LinkedIn ou par mail à dx@donatienleon.com) et je vous enverrai une petite surprise en remerciement.

In this episode on Midnight Mass (2021), I explore the portrayal of the crisis of faith that accompanies a world-class existential crisis. Mental Health is Horrifying is hosted by Candis Green, Registered Psychotherapist and owner of Many Moons Therapy...............................................................Show Notes:Join Illuminative Tarot for Working With Trauma to learn creative ways to work with tarot as a supportive partner in the healing process. Want to work together? I offer 1:1 psychotherapy (Ontario), along with tarot, horror, and dreamwork services, but individually and through my group program, the Final Girls Club. Podcast artwork by Chloe Hurst at Contempo MintMike Flanagan opens up about the personal journey that shaped his buzzed-about Midnight Mass by Nick Romano Staring at the sun: Overcoming the terror of death by Irvin Yalom

When we become aware of our innate human nature and stop trying to control something that isn't controllable, we can break away from the mental prison we often find ourselves in and start to recognise that we have more freedom than we thought. Carly draws on the wisdom of psychotherapist, Irvin Yalom and existential philosopher, Jean-Paul Satre to help you gain insight into your human nature and recognise the freedom you have to choose how you live your life.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Bu bölümde Irvin Yalom'un klasikleşmiş eseri Aşkın Celladı üzerine konuşuyorum. Kitabın genel yapısını ele alırken, altını çizdiğim cümleleri paylaşıyor ve üzerine kendi düşüncelerimi ekliyorum. Terapi sürecine, insana ve Yalom'un büyülü anlatımına dair bir yolculuğa çıkmaya hazır mısınız?#IrvinYalom #AşkınCelladı #Psikoterapi #Şifa #Terapi #Psikoloji #KitapTavsiyesi #KitapAnalizi #İyileşme #PsikolojiPodcast #Ra'nınGözü

Our guest this time is Dr. Daniel N. Watter. Dan is an existential sex therapist and he has so much to say about appreciating sexuality as we age instead of extolling the virtues of youthful sexuality. He has a fresh approach to the connection between death anxiety and sexuality. Dan talks with us about the existential importance of the penis and the idea that the penis is speaking but sometimes in a whisper. Dr. Watter is the author of more than 30 professional articles and book chapters on topics such as sexual function and dysfunction, and ethics in healthcare practice. He most recently completed the new book, The Existential Importance of the Penis: A Guide to Understanding Male Sexuality and a new article about men, sex, and aging for the Journal of Sexual Medicine. Dan has been a practicing clinical and forensic psychologist and certified sex therapist for more than 35 years. He is licensed as both a psychologist and a marital and family therapist. In addition, he is Board Certified in Sex Therapy by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT), and the American Board of Sexology (ACS), of which he also holds Fellowship status. Dr. Watter is an AASECT certified sex therapy supervisor and has been elected to Fellowship Status in the International Society for the Study of Women's Sexual Health (ISSWSH). In addition to his clinical practice, he is a faculty member at the University of Michigan School of Social Work's Sexual Certification Program and the Modern Sex Therapy Institutes. He has taught at a number of colleges, universities, and medical schools in the past. Dr. Watter is a member of several professional organizations and has been elected to leadership positions in many including the New Jersey Psychological Association's Ethics Committee, the Society for Sex Therapy and Research (SSTAR), and AASECT. He's been the Chair of the AASECT Ethics Advisory Committee and President of SSTAR. You can reach Dan Watter here. And you can check out his new book here. If you'd like to read any of the other books we discussed, you can find Irvin Yalom's work here, and Peggy Kleinplatz's book, Magnificent Sex: Lessons from Extraordinary Lovers  here. If you want to catch up on other shows, just visit our website and please subscribe! We love our listeners and welcome your feedback, so if you love Our Better Half, please give us a 5-star rating and follow us on Facebook and Instagram. It really helps support our show! As always, thanks for listening!  

December 16, 2024 Discussion on the book "Hour of the Heart" by Irvin Yalom and Benjamin Yalom by Dr. Farid Holakouee

Send us a textIn this week's episode, my guest & clinical psychologist Ali Ilyas, explores the impact and work of existential psychiatrist, Dr. Irvin Yalom. We dive into core themes like: mortality, meaning, death anxiety, and the unique dynamics of the therapist-client relationship, such as transference and countertransference. Ali shares how Yalom's teachings have shaped his personal journey and therapeutic practice, while also discussing the importance of reflecting on death, finding balance between life and death anxiety, and how existential therapy can offer deep insights for those struggling with life's big questions. About Muhammad Ali IlyasAli is a clinical psychologist residing in Dubai, UAE. In his psychotherapy work, Ali guides clients on their journey of self-discovery and helps them navigate existential challenges, using philosophical and psychological perspectives. He has  spoken at platforms such as TEDx events, literary festivals, and podcasts to name a few. Ali is also a neuromarketing consultant, and corporate trainer applying interdisciplinary insights from psychology and related fields to help individuals and organizations achieve their goals and find meaning in their lives.LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aliilyasm/Website: https://www.connectpsychology.ae/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepersonandthecouch/  Subscribe to the Behind the Stigma podcast on Apple Podcast or Spotify.Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/behindthestigmapodcast/

"One of the many paradoxes of the Christian life is that when God sees your genuine humility, He exalts you." Join Dawn and Steve in the Morning for a devotional from Blackaby Ministries International about cultivating humility. Also this hour, Phil Herndon with Tin Man Ministries is in the studio to help us process that powerful emotion called anger. Phil uses a dynamic approach to help his clients recover their hearts and redeem their stories. His therapeutic approach is grounded in the Spiritual Root System™, and is informed by the work of Irvin Yalom, Curt Thompson, Dan Siegel, and Dan Allender. He also integrates perspectives from Judeo-Christian traditions, and pastoral care. Phil works with individuals who have lost their way through addiction, anxiety, depression, struggles with spirituality, or burnout to walk them through the tumultuous and scary times that are so common to the human experience.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Start your day with Dawn and Steve in the Morning as they share a devotional from Open the Bible about praying for our leaders. What are mirror neurons? Phil Herndon from Tin Man Ministries is here to help us learn more about the brain and how fearfully and wonderfully made we are! Phil uses a dynamic approach to help his clients recover their hearts and redeem their stories. His therapeutic approach is grounded in the Spiritual Root System™, and is informed by the work of Irvin Yalom, Curt Thompson, Dan Siegel, and Dan Allender. He also integrates perspectives from Judeo-Christian traditions, and pastoral care. Phil works with individuals who have lost their way through addiction, anxiety, depression, struggles with spirituality, or burnout to walk them through the tumultuous and scary times that are so common to the human experience.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Crisis in Psychotherapy: Reclaiming Its Soul in the Age of Neoliberalism" Summary: Explore the identity crisis facing psychotherapy in today's market-driven healthcare system. Learn how neoliberal capitalism and consumerism have shaped our understanding of self and mental health. Discover why mainstream therapy often reinforces individualistic self-constructions and how digital technologies risk reducing therapy to scripted interactions. Understand the need for psychotherapy to reimagine its approach, addressing social and political contexts of suffering. Join us as we examine the urgent call for a psychotherapy of liberation to combat the mental health toll of late capitalism and build a more just, caring world. Hashtags: #PsychotherapyCrisis #MentalHealthReform #NeoliberalismAndTherapy #TherapyRevolution #SocialJusticeInMentalHealth #CriticalPsychology #HolisticHealing #TherapeuticLiberation #ConsumerismAndMentalHealth #PsychotherapyFuture #CapitalismAndMentalHealth #DeepTherapy #TherapyAndSocialChange #MentalHealthActivism #PsychologicalEmancipation   Key Points: Psychotherapy is facing an identity and purpose crisis in the era of market-driven healthcare, as depth, nuance, and the therapeutic relationship are being displaced by cost containment, standardization, and mass-reproducibility. This crisis stems from a shift in notions of the self and therapy's aims, shaped by the rise of neoliberal capitalism and consumerism. The “empty self” plagued by inner lack pursues fulfillment through goods, experiences, and attainments. Mainstream psychotherapy largely reinforces this alienated, individualistic self-construction. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and manualized treatments focus narrowly on “maladaptive” thoughts and behaviors without examining broader contexts. The biomedical model's hegemony views psychological struggles as brain diseases treated pharmacologically, individualizing and medicalizing distress despite research linking it to life pains like poverty, unemployment, trauma, and isolation. Digital technologies further the trend towards disembodied, technocratic mental healthcare, risking reducing therapy to scripted interactions and gamified inputs. The neoliberal transformation of psychotherapy in the 1970s, examined by sociologist Samuel Binkley, aligned the dominant therapeutic model centered on personal growth and self-actualization with a neoliberal agenda that cast individuals as enterprising consumers responsible for their own fulfillment. To reclaim its emancipatory potential, psychotherapy must reimagine its understanding of the self and psychological distress, moving beyond an intrapsychic focus to grapple with the social, political, and existential contexts of suffering. This transformation requires fostering critical consciousness, relational vitality, collective empowerment, and aligning with movements for social justice and systemic change. The struggle to reimagine therapy is inseparable from the struggle to build a more just, caring, and sustainable world. A psychotherapy of liberation is urgently needed to address the mental health toll of late capitalism. The neoliberal restructuring of healthcare and academia marginalized psychotherapy's humanistic foundations, subordinating mental health services to market logic and elevating reductive, manualized approaches. Psychotherapy's capitulation to market forces reflects a broader disenchantment of politics by economics, reducing the complexities of mental distress to quantifiable, medicalized entities and eviscerating human subjectivity. While intuitive and phenomenological approaches are celebrated in other scientific fields like linguistics and physics, they are often dismissed in mainstream psychology, reflecting an aversion to knowledge that resists quantification. Psychotherapy should expand its understanding of meaningful evidence, making room for intuitive insights, subjective experiences, and phenomenological explorations alongside quantitative data. Academic psychology's hostility towards Jungian concepts, even as neurology revalidates them under different names, reflects hypocrisy and a commitment to familiar but ineffective models. To reclaim its relevance, psychotherapy must reconnect with its philosophical and anthropological roots, reintegrating broader frameworks to develop a more holistic understanding of mental health beyond symptom management. How Market Forces are Shaping the Practice and Future of Psychotherapy The field of psychotherapy faces an identity and purpose crisis in the era of market-driven healthcare. As managed care, pharmaceutical dominance, and the biomedical model reshape mental health treatment, psychotherapy's traditional foundations – depth, nuance, the therapeutic relationship – are being displaced by the imperatives of cost containment, standardization, and mass-reproducibility. This shift reflects the ascendancy of a neoliberal cultural ideology reducing the complexity of human suffering to decontextualized symptoms to be efficiently eliminated, not a meaningful experience to be explored and transformed. In “Constructing the Self, Constructing America,” cultural historian Philip Cushman argues this psychotherapy crisis stems from a shift in notions of the self and therapy's aims. Individual identity and psychological health are shaped by cultural, economic and political forces, not universal. The rise of neoliberal capitalism and consumerism birthed the “empty self” plagued by inner lack, pursuing fulfillment through goods, experiences, and attainments – insecure, inadequate, fearing to fall behind in life's competitive race. Mainstream psychotherapy largely reinforces this alienated, individualistic self-construction. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and manualized treatment focus narrowly on “maladaptive” thoughts and behaviors without examining social, political, existential contexts. Packaging therapy into standardized modules strips away relational essence for managed care's needs. Therapists become technicians reinforcing a decontextualized view locating problems solely in the individual, overlooking unjust social conditions shaping lives and psyches. Central is the biomedical model's hegemony, viewing psychological struggles as brain diseases treated pharmacologically – a seductive but illusory promise. Antidepressant use has massively grown despite efficacy and safety doubts, driven by pharma marketing casting everyday distress as a medical condition, not deeper malaise. The model individualizes and medicalizes distress despite research linking depression to life pains like poverty, unemployment, trauma, isolation. Digital technologies further the trend towards disembodied, technocratic mental healthcare. Online therapy platforms and apps expand access but risk reducing therapy to scripted interactions and gamified inputs, not genuine, embodied attunement and meaning-making. In his book “Getting Loose: Lifestyle Consumption in the 1970s,” sociologist Samuel Binkley examines how the social transformations of the 1970s, driven by the rise of neoliberalism and consumer culture, profoundly reshaped notions of selfhood and the goals of therapeutic practice. Binkley argues that the dominant therapeutic model that emerged during this period – one centered on the pursuit of personal growth, self-actualization, and the “loosening” of the self from traditional constraints – unwittingly aligned itself with a neoliberal agenda that cast individuals as enterprising consumers responsible for their own fulfillment and well-being. While ostensibly liberatory, this “getting loose” ethos, Binkley contends, ultimately reinforced the atomization and alienation of the self under late capitalism. By locating the source of and solution to psychological distress solely within the individual psyche, it obscured the broader social, economic, and political forces shaping mental health. In doing so, it inadvertently contributed to the very conditions of “getting loose” – the pervasive sense of being unmoored, fragmented, and adrift – that it sought to alleviate. Binkley's analysis offers a powerful lens for understanding the current crisis of psychotherapy. It suggests that the field's increasing embrace of decontextualized, technocratic approaches to treatment is not merely a capitulation to market pressures, but a logical extension of a therapeutic paradigm that has long been complicit with the individualizing logic of neoliberalism. If psychotherapy is to reclaim its emancipatory potential, it must fundamentally reimagine its understanding of the self and the nature of psychological distress. This reimagining requires a move beyond the intrapsychic focus of traditional therapy to one that grapples with the social, political, and existential contexts of suffering. It means working to foster critical consciousness, relational vitality, and collective empowerment – helping individuals to deconstruct the oppressive narratives and power structures that constrain their lives, and to tap into alternative sources of identity, belonging, and purpose. Such a transformation is not just a matter of therapeutic technique, but of political and ethical commitment. It demands that therapists reimagine their work not merely as a means of alleviating individual symptoms, but as a form of social and political action aimed at nurturing personal and collective liberation. This means cultivating spaces of collective healing and visioning, and aligning ourselves with the movements for social justice and systemic change. At stake is nothing less than the survival of psychotherapy as a healing art. If current trends persist, our field will devolve into a caricature of itself, a hollow simulacrum of the ‘branded, efficient, quality-controlled' treatment packages hocked by managed care. Therapists will be relegated to the role of glorified skills coaches and symptom-suppression specialists, while the deep psychic wounds and social pathologies underlying the epidemic of mental distress will metastasize unchecked. The choice before us is stark: Do we collude with a system that offers only the veneer of care while perpetuating the conditions of collective madness? Or do we commit ourselves anew to the still-revolutionary praxis of tending psyche, dialoguing with the unconscious, and ‘giving a soul to psychiatry' (Hillman, 1992)? Ultimately, the struggle to reimagine therapy is inseparable from the struggle to build a more just, caring, and sustainable world. As the mental health toll of late capitalism continues to mount, the need for a psychotherapy of liberation has never been more urgent. By rising to this challenge, we open up new possibilities for resilience, regeneration, and revolutionary love – and begin to create the world we long for, even as we heal the world we have. The Neoliberal Transformation of Psychotherapy The shift in psychotherapy's identity and purpose can be traced to the broader socioeconomic transformations of the late 20th century, particularly the rise of neoliberalism under the Reagan and Thatcher administrations. Neoliberal ideology, with its emphasis on privatization, deregulation, and the supremacy of market forces, profoundly reshaped the landscapes of healthcare and academia in which psychotherapy is embedded. As healthcare became increasingly privatized and profit-driven, the provision of mental health services was subordinated to the logic of the market. The ascendancy of managed care organizations and private insurance companies created powerful new stakeholders who saw psychotherapy not as a healing art, but as a commodity to be standardized, packaged, and sold. Under this market-driven system, the value of therapy was reduced to its cost-effectiveness and its capacity to produce swift, measurable outcomes. Depth, nuance, and the exploration of meaning – the traditional heart of the therapeutic enterprise – were casualties of this shift. Concurrent with these changes in healthcare, the neoliberal restructuring of academia further marginalized psychotherapy's humanistic foundations. As universities increasingly embraced a corporate model, they became beholden to the same market imperatives of efficiency, standardization, and quantification. In this milieu, the kind of research and training that could sustain a rich, multi-faceted understanding of the therapeutic process was devalued in favor of reductive, manualized approaches more amenable to the demands of the market. This academic climate elevated a narrow caste of specialists – often far removed from clinical practice – who were empowered to define the parameters of legitimate knowledge and practice in the field. Beholden to the interests of managed care, the pharmaceutical industry, and the biomedical establishment, these “experts” played a key role in cementing the hegemony of the medical model and sidelining alternative therapeutic paradigms. Psychotherapy training increasingly reflected these distorted priorities, producing generations of therapists versed in the language of symptom management and behavioral intervention, but often lacking a deeper understanding of the human condition. As researcher William Davies has argued, this neoliberal transformation of psychotherapy reflects a broader “disenchantment of politics by economics.” By reducing the complexities of mental distress to quantifiable, medicalized entities, the field has become complicit in the evisceration of human subjectivity under late capitalism. In place of a situated, meaning-making self, we are left with the hollow figure of “homo economicus” – a rational, self-interested actor shorn of deeper psychological and spiritual moorings. Tragically, the public discourse around mental health has largely been corralled into this narrow, market-friendly mold. Discussions of “chemical imbalances,” “evidence-based treatments,” and “quick fixes” abound, while more searching explorations of the psychospiritual malaise of our times are relegated to the margins. The result is a flattened, impoverished understanding of both the nature of psychological distress and the possibilities of therapeutic transformation. Psychotherapy's capitulation to market forces is thus not merely an abdication of its healing potential, but a betrayal of its emancipatory promise. By uncritically aligning itself with the dominant ideology of our age, the field has become an instrument of social control rather than a catalyst for individual and collective liberation. If therapy is to reclaim its soul, it must begin by confronting this history and imagining alternative futures beyond the neoliberal horizon. Intuition in Other Scientific Fields Noam Chomsky's groundbreaking work in linguistics and cognitive science has long been accepted as scientific canon, despite its heavy reliance on intuition and introspective phenomenology. His theories of deep grammatical structures and an innate language acquisition device in the human mind emerged not from controlled experiments or quantitative data analysis, but from a deep, intuitive engagement with the patterns of human language and thought. Yet while Chomsky's ideas are celebrated for their revolutionary implications, similar approaches in the field of psychotherapy are often met with skepticism or outright dismissal. The work of Carl Jung, for instance, which posits the existence of a collective unconscious and universal archetypes shaping human experience, is often relegated to the realm of pseudoscience or mysticism by the mainstream psychological establishment. This double standard reflects a deep-seated insecurity within academic and medical psychology about engaging with phenomena that resist easy quantification or empirical verification. There is a pervasive fear of straying too far from the narrow confines of what can be measured, controlled, and reduced to standardized formulas. Ironically, this insecurity persists even as cutting-edge research in fields like neuroscience and cognitive psychology increasingly validates many of Jung's once-marginalized ideas. Concepts like “implicit memory,” “event-related potentials,” and “predictive processing” bear striking resemblances to Jungian notions of the unconscious mind, while advanced brain imaging techniques confirm the neurological basis of personality frameworks like the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). Yet rather than acknowledging the pioneering nature of Jung's insights, the psychological establishment often repackages these ideas in more palatable, “scientific” terminology. This aversion to intuition and subjective experience is hardly unique to psychotherapy. Across the sciences, there is a widespread mistrust of knowledge that cannot be reduced to quantifiable data points and mathematical models. However, some of the most transformative scientific advances have emerged from precisely this kind of intuitive, imaginative thinking. Albert Einstein's theory of relativity, for instance, emerged not from empirical data, but from a thought experiment – an act of pure imagination. The physicist David Bohm's innovative theories about the implicate order of the universe were rooted in a profoundly intuitive understanding of reality. And the mathematician Srinivasa Ramanujan attributed his brilliant insights to visions from a Hindu goddess – a claim that might be dismissed as delusional in a clinical context, but is celebrated as an expression of his unique genius. Psychotherapy should not abandon empirical rigor or the scientific method, but rather expand its understanding of what constitutes meaningful evidence. By making room for intuitive insights, subjective experiences, and phenomenological explorations alongside quantitative data and experimental findings, the field can develop a richer, more multidimensional understanding of the human mind and the process of psychological transformation. This expansive, integrative approach is necessary for psychotherapy to rise to the challenges of our time – the crisis of meaning and authenticity in an increasingly fragmented world, the epidemic of mental illness and addiction, and the collective traumas of social oppression and ecological devastation. Only by honoring the full spectrum of human knowledge and experience can we hope to catalyze the kind of deep, lasting change that our world so desperately needs. It is a particular vexation of mine that academic psychology is so hostile to the vague but perennial ideas about the unconscious that Jung and others posited. Now neurology is re-validating Jungian concepts under different names like “implicit memory”, “event-related potentials”, and “secondary and tertiary consciousness”, while qEEG brain maps are validating the underlying assumptions of the Jungian-derived MBTI. Yet the academy still cannot admit they were wrong and Jung was right, even as they publish papers in “premiere” academic journals like The Lancet that denounce Jung as pseudoscience while repurposing his ideas. This is another example of hypocrisy. Academia seems to believe its publications have innate efficacy and ethics as long as the proper rituals of psychological research are enacted. If you cite your sources, review recent literature in your echo chamber, disclose financial interests, and profess ignorance of your profession's history and the unethical systems funding your existence, then you are doing research correctly. But the systems paying for your work and existence are not mere “financial interests” – that's just business! This is considered perfectly rational, as long as one doesn't think too deeply about it. Claiming “I don't get into that stuff” or “I do academic/medical psychology” has become a way to defend oneself from not having a basic understanding of how humans and cultures are traumatized or motivated, even while running universities and hospitals. The attitude seems to be: “Let's just keep handing out CBT and drugs for another 50 years, ‘rationally' and ‘evidence-based' of course, and see how much worse things get in mental health.” No wonder outcomes and the replication crisis worsen every year, even as healthcare is ostensibly guided by rational, empirical forces. Academia has created a model of reality called science, applied so single-mindedly that they no longer care if the outcomes mirror those of the real world science was meant to serve! Academic and medical psychology have created a copy of the world they interact with, pretending it reflects reality while it fundamentally cannot, due to the material incentives driving it. We've created a scientific model meant to reflect reality, but mistake it for reality itself. We reach in vain to move objects in the mirror instead of putting the mirror away and engaging with what's actually there. How do we not see that hyper-rationalism is just another form of religion, even as we tried to replace religion with it? This conception of psychology is not only an imaginary model, but actively at war with the real, cutting us off from truly logical, evidence-based pathways we could pursue. It wars with objective reality because both demand our total allegiance. We must choose entirely between the object and its reflection, god and idol. We must decide if we want the uncertainty of real science or the imaginary sandbox we pretend is science. Adherence to this simulacrum in search of effective trauma and mental illness treatments has itself become a cultural trauma response – an addiction to the familiar and broken over the effective and frightening. This is no different than a cult or conspiracy theory. A major pillar of our civilization would rather perpetuate what is familiar and broken than dare to change. Such methodological fundamentalism is indistinguishable from religious devotion. We have a group so committed to their notion of the rational that they've decided reason and empiricism should no longer be beholden to reality. How is our approach to clinical psychology research any different than a belief in magic? The deflections of those controlling mainstream psychology should sound familiar – they are the same ego defenses we'd identify in a traumatized therapy patient. Academic psychology's reasoning is starting to resemble what it would diagnose as a personality disorder: “It's not me doing it wrong, even though I'm not getting the results I want! It's the world that's wrong by not enabling my preferred approach. Effective practitioners must be cheating or deluded. Those who do it like me are right, though none of us get good results. We'd better keep doing it our way, but harder.” As noted in my Healing the Modern Soul series, I believe that since part of psychology's role is to functionally define the “self”, clinical psychology is inherently political. Material forces will always seek to define and control what psychology can be. Most healthy definitions of self threaten baseless tradition, hierarchy, fascism, capital hoarding, and the co-opting of culture to manipulate consumption. Our culture is sick, and thus resistant to a psychology that would challenge its unhealthy games with a coherent sense of self. Like any patient, our culture wants to deflect and fears the first step of healing: admitting you have a problem. That sickness strokes the right egos and lines the right pockets, a societal-scale version of Berne's interpersonal games. Our current psychological paradigm requires a hierarchy with one group playing sick, emotional child to the other's hyper-rational, all-knowing parent. The relationship is inherently transactional, and we need to make it more authentic and collaborative. I have argued before  that one of the key challenges facing psychotherapy today is the fragmentation and complexity of modern identity. In a globalized, digitally-connected world, we are constantly navigating a myriad of roles, relationships, and cultural contexts, each with its own set of expectations and demands. Even though most people would agree that our system is bad the fragmentary nature of the postmodern has left us looking through a kaleidoscope. We are unable to agree on hero, villain, cause, solution, framework or label. This fragmentation leads to a sense of disconnection and confusion, a feeling that we are not living an authentic or integrated life. The task of psychotherapy, in this context, is to help individuals develop a more coherent and resilient sense of self, one that can withstand the centrifugal forces of modern existence. Psychotherapy can become a new mirror to cancel out the confusing reflections of the kaleidoscope. We need a new better functioning understanding of self in psychology for society to see the self and for the self to see clearly our society. The Fragmentation of Psychotherapy: Reconnecting with Philosophy and Anthropology To reclaim its soul and relevance, psychotherapy must reconnect with its philosophical and anthropological roots. These disciplines offer essential perspectives on the nature of human existence, the formation of meaning and identity, and the cultural contexts that shape our psychological realities. By reintegrating these broader frameworks, we can develop a more holistic and nuanced understanding of mental health that goes beyond the narrow confines of symptom management. Many of the most influential figures in the history of psychotherapy have argued for this more integrative approach. Irvin Yalom, for instance, has long championed an existential orientation to therapy that grapples with the fundamental questions of human existence – death, freedom, isolation, and meaninglessness. Erik Erikson's psychosocial theory of development explicitly situated psychological growth within a broader cultural and historical context. Peter Levine's work on trauma healing draws heavily from anthropological insights into the body's innate capacity for self-regulation and resilience. Carl Jung, perhaps more than any other figure, insisted on the inseparability of psychology from broader humanistic inquiry. His concepts of the collective unconscious and archetypes were rooted in a deep engagement with mythology, anthropology, and comparative religion. Jung understood that individual psychological struggles often reflect larger cultural and spiritual crises, and that healing must address both personal and collective dimensions of experience. Despite the profound insights offered by these thinkers, mainstream psychotherapy has largely ignored their calls for a more integrative approach. The field's increasing alignment with the medical model and its pursuit of “evidence-based” treatments has led to a narrow focus on standardized interventions that can be easily quantified and replicated. While this approach has its merits, it often comes at the cost of deeper engagement with the philosophical and cultural dimensions of psychological experience. The relationship between psychology, philosophy, and anthropology is not merely a matter of academic interest – it is essential to the practice of effective and meaningful therapy. Philosophy provides the conceptual tools to grapple with questions of meaning, ethics, and the nature of consciousness that are often at the heart of psychological distress. Anthropology offers crucial insights into the cultural shaping of identity, the diversity of human experience, and the social contexts that give rise to mental health challenges. By reconnecting with these disciplines, psychotherapy can develop a more nuanced and culturally informed approach to healing. This might involve: Incorporating philosophical inquiry into the therapeutic process, helping clients explore questions of meaning, purpose, and values. Drawing on anthropological insights to understand how cultural norms and social structures shape psychological experience and expressions of distress. Developing more holistic models of mental health that account for the interconnectedness of mind, body, culture, and environment. Fostering dialogue between psychotherapists, philosophers, and anthropologists to enrich our understanding of human experience and suffering. Training therapists in a broader range of humanistic disciplines to cultivate a more integrative and culturally sensitive approach to healing. The reintegration of philosophy and anthropology into psychotherapy is not merely an academic exercise – it is essential for addressing the complex psychological challenges of our time. As we grapple with global crises like climate change, political polarization, and the erosion of traditional sources of meaning, we need a psychology that can engage with the big questions of human existence and the cultural forces shaping our collective psyche. By reclaiming its connections to philosophy and anthropology, psychotherapy can move beyond its current crisis and reclaim its role as a vital force for individual and collective healing. In doing so, it can offer not just symptom relief, but a deeper engagement with the fundamental questions of what it means to be human in an increasingly complex and interconnected world. References: Binkley, S. (2007). Getting loose: Lifestyle consumption in the 1970s. Duke University Press. Cipriani, A., Furukawa, T. A., Salanti, G., Chaimani, A., Atkinson, L. Z., Ogawa, Y., … & Geddes, J. R. (2018). Comparative efficacy and acceptability of 21 antidepressant drugs for the acute treatment of adults with major depressive disorder: a systematic review and network meta-analysis. The Lancet, 391(10128), 1357-1366. Cushman, P. (1995). Constructing the self, constructing America: A cultural history of psychotherapy. Boston: Addison-Wesley. Davies, W. (2014). The limits of neoliberalism: Authority, sovereignty and the logic of competition. Sage. Fisher, M. (2009). Capitalist realism: Is there no alternative?. John Hunt Publishing. Hillman, J. (1992). The thought of the heart and the soul of the world. Spring Publications. Kirsch, I. (2010). The emperor's new drugs: Exploding the antidepressant myth. Basic Books. Layton, L. (2009). Who's responsible? Our mutual implication in each other's suffering. Psychoanalytic Dialogues, 19(2), 105-120. Penny, L. (2015). Self-care isn't enough. We need community care to thrive. Open Democracy. Retrieved from https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/transformation/selfcare-isnt-enough-we-need-community-care-to-thrive/ Rose, N. (2019). Our psychiatric future: The politics of mental health. John Wiley & Sons. Samuels, A. (2014). Politics on the couch: Citizenship and the internal life. Karnac Books. Shedler, J. (2018). Where is the evidence for “evidence-based” therapy?. Psychiatric Clinics, 41(2), 319-329. Sugarman, J. (2015). Neoliberalism and psychological ethics. Journal of Theoretical and Philosophical Psychology, 35(2), 103. Watkins, M., & Shulman, H. (2008). Toward psychologies of liberation. Palgrave Macmillan. Whitaker, R. (2010). Anatomy of an epidemic: Magic bullets, psychiatric drugs, and the astonishing rise of mental illness in America. Broadway Books. Winerman, L. (2017). By the numbers: Antidepressant use on the rise. Monitor on Psychology, 48(10), 120. Suggested further reading: Bordo, S. (2004). Unbearable weight: Feminism, Western culture, and the body. University of California Press. Cacioppo, J. T., & Patrick, W. (2008). Loneliness: Human nature and the need for social connection. WW Norton & Company. Deleuze, G., & Guattari, F. (1988). A thousand plateaus: Capitalism and schizophrenia. Bloomsbury Publishing. Fanon, F. (2007). The wretched of the earth. Grove/Atlantic, Inc. Foucault, M. (1988). Madness and civilization: A history of insanity in the age of reason. Vintage. Freire, P. (1970). Pedagogy of the oppressed. Bloomsbury publishing USA. Fromm, E. (1955). The sane society. Routledge. Hari, J. (2018). Lost connections: Uncovering the real causes of depression–and the unexpected solutions. Bloomsbury Publishing USA. Herman, J. L. (2015). Trauma and recovery: The aftermath of violence–from domestic abuse to political terror. Hachette UK. hooks, b. (2014). Teaching to transgress. Routledge. Illouz, E. (2008). Saving the modern soul: Therapy, emotions, and the culture of self-help. Univ of California Press. Laing, R. D. (1960). The divided self: An existential study in sanity and madness. Penguin UK. Martín-Baró, I. (1996). Writings for a liberation psychology. Harvard University Press. McKenzie, K., & Bhui, K. (Eds.). (2020). Institutional racism in psychiatry and clinical psychology: Race matters in mental health. Springer Nature. Metzl, J. M. (2010). The protest psychosis: How schizophrenia became a black disease. Beacon Press. Orr, J. (2006). Panic diaries: A genealogy of panic disorder. Duke University Press. Scaer, R. (2014). The body bears the burden: Trauma, dissociation, and disease. Routledge. Szasz, T. S. (1997). The manufacture of madness: A comparative study of the inquisition and the mental health movement. Syracuse University Press. Taylor, C. (2012). Sources of the self: The making of the modern identity. Cambridge University Press. Teo, T. (2015). Critical psychology: A geography of intellectual engagement and resistance. American Psychologist, 70(3), 243. Tolleson, J. (2011). Saving the world one patient at a time: Psychoanalysis and social critique. Psychotherapy and Politics International, 9(2), 160-170.

In this short episode, Dr. Fred reflects on his recent podcast interview with Rachel Fiorentino, a nurse and tarot card reader. He expresses his newfound appreciation for tarot cards as a powerful tool for self-discovery and healing. Dr. Fred shares the insights he gained from the tarot card readings Rachel gave him during the podcast. The first reading revealed that he relies too heavily on his intellect, represented by the swords, and needs to listen more to his heart, represented by the Ace of Cups. The second reading, featuring the Devil, the Hangman, and the High Priestess cards, resonated with Dr. Fred's role as "the Undoctor" - someone who challenges conventional narratives around mental illness. It encouraged him to shed his ego, embrace his unique perspective, and follow his intuition on a path towards self-actualization. Dr. Fred discusses how this experience aligns with his recent studies of Carl Rogers, Irvin Yalom, and mindfulness meditation, all guiding him towards self-actualization and transforming the conversation around mental health. He invites listeners to be open-minded about tarot cards, just as practices like meditation and yoga were once considered "woo-woo" but are now mainstream. Dr. Fred sees tarot as a beautiful way to tap into the subconscious, unconscious, and super-conscious aspects of ourselves on the journey of self-discovery. Overall, the episode promotes an appreciation for tarot cards as a valuable healing modality and encourages listeners to explore Rachel's upcoming full podcast interview.  

Hey guys, welcome back to The Mind Mate Podcast! I'm your host, Tom Ahern, and in today's episode, we're diving deep into the fascinating world of psychotherapy through the eyes of two legendary figures: Carl Rogers and Irvin Yalom. Carl Rogers, the mastermind behind client-centred therapy, has revolutionised the way we think about the therapeutic process. One of his most famous quotes is, "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change." Today, we'll explore how Rogers' emphasis on unconditional positive regard, empathy, and authenticity creates a nurturing environment where clients can truly thrive and discover their genuine selves. On the flip side, we have Irvin Yalom, a pioneer in existential psychotherapy, who brings a unique perspective on the human condition. Yalom's approach is deeply rooted in addressing fundamental human concerns like death, freedom, isolation, and meaning. He beautifully encapsulates his philosophy with the quote, "The therapist is the fellow traveler, not a master or superior; the aim is to guide the patient on a journey of self-discovery." We'll discuss how his collaborative and humanistic approach helps individuals navigate their existential journeys.In this episode, I'll be breaking down the core principles of both Rogers' and Yalom's therapeutic goals, and how their insights can help us achieve greater self-understanding, acceptance, and fulfilment. Whether you're a therapist, a psychology enthusiast, or someone keen on personal growth, this episode is packed with valuable insights and inspiration.So, sit back, relax, and join me as we uncover the transformative potential of therapy with the wisdom of Carl Rogers and Irvin Yalom. *** The Mind Mate podcast provides listeners with tools and ideas to get to know themselves. Psychology-based with an existential twist, the podcast delves into topics ranging from philosophy, spirituality, creativity, psychedelia and, of course, the meaning of life! Your host Tom is a counsellor and psychotherapist who specialises in existential concerns and relationships. He is also a writer who enjoys exploring the ideas that emerge in therapy to help people live meaningful lives. Find out more here: https://ahern.blog/

Dr. Christof Koch: Consciousness, Free Will & The Grand Theory of Everything In this episode we interview Dr. Christof Koch, a trained physicist turned neuroscientist who's primary area of research focuses on consciousness. We sit down with Dr. Koch to discuss his latest book "Then I am Myself the World" out in May of 2024 on Basic Books where he recounts his experience with consciousness altering substances, Integrated Information Theory, which is the foundational theory for his research, and of course...what he's currently reading! You can find all of the books mentioned in this episode in the links below. ⁠⁠ In Defense of Food by Michael Pollan ⁠https://amzn.to/3WlhDy4⁠ The Schopenhauer Cure by Irvin Yalom ⁠https://amzn.to/4b1JdoK⁠ When Nietzsche Wept by Irvin Yalom ⁠https://amzn.to/3UnSLDd⁠ The Feeling of Life Itself by Christof Koch ⁠https://amzn.to/3Umeewf⁠ The Doors of Perception by Aldous Huxley ⁠https://amzn.to/3Qtn61Y⁠ Oblivion by David Foster Wallace ⁠https://amzn.to/3WkLG91⁠ Determined by Robert Sapolsky ⁠https://amzn.to/3JH1Imc⁠

This week on The Tarot Diagnosis Podcast, I'm getting existential. There's been an uptick in discussion in my therapy practice around the concept of death, the meaning of life, and existential dread. So, naturally I'm turning to tarot to help me examine, ponder, and even come to terms with my own existential dread. The Five of Cups, Queen of Swords, Hanged Man, Two of Wands, and Nine of Cups all make an appearance and help to write the narrative of an existential crisis. I'm inspired by Freud's essay “On Transience” as well as the work of Dr. Irvin Yalom this episode. Deck used: Tarot Vintage (of course) If you love The Tarot Diagnosis Podcast, please be sure to hit those 5 stars and write us a review on whatever platform you listen to us on. It really is a HUGE help to us and allows more people to see our podcast! Have a topic you'd like to hear about? We're always interested in hearing your suggestions!⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to submit a topic! Don't forget to subscribe to our email list to get all kinds of free mental health and tarot goodies on our website, as well as access to our private membership community The Symposium!⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.TheTarotDiagnosis.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow The Tarot Diagnosis on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@TheTarotDiagnosis⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Audio Edited by Anthony DiGiacomo of⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠Deep Resonance Sound⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Contact: DeepResonanceSound@gmail.com Music by Timmoor from Pixabay

Embark on a transformative journey through the landscape of group therapy with us, your seasoned navigators, Dr. Linton Hutchinson and Stacy Frost. With a nod to the pioneering work of Dr. Irvin Yalom, we're tearing down the walls of traditional mental health discussions, bringing to light the essential concepts for your Licensure Exams. Prepare to break the ice on therapy modalities, from individual sessions to the communal embrace of group, couples, and family therapy.This episode is a treasure trove of insights, where the warmth of shared stories meets the cool analysis of therapeutic factors. We chart Yalom's eleven therapeutic touchstones that spark change in group therapy settings, starting with the 'installation of hope' and journeying through to the 'concept of universality.' Whether you're seeking to replenish your mental health knowledge reservoir or simply curious about the collective healing power of shared experiences, we've got the antidote to the textbook tedium. Get ready to be inspired by the camaraderie and growth that only a group dynamic can foster.If you need to study for your national licensing exam, try the free samplers at: LicensureExamsThis podcast is not associated with the NBCC, AMFTRB, ASW, ANCC, NASP, NAADAC, CCMC, NCPG, CRCC, or any state or governmental agency responsible for licensure.

Auch ohne romantisches Dinner könnt ihr am Valentinstag das schönste Gefühl der Welt feiern – mit einem Liebesroman, gemütlich eingekuschelt auf der Couch. Karla und Günter stellen euch in dieser Folge vier Bücher vor, die differenziert, klug und bittersüß von der Liebe erzählen. In „Das verborgene Leben der Farben“ (btb) von Laura Imai Messina stellt Mio in einem Atelier in Japan Kimonos her. Farbnuancen bestimmen ihr Leben. Als sie Aoi begegnet, sind die beiden wie Komplementärfarben, doch ein Geheimnis steht zwischen ihnen. Ihre lebenslange Liebe schildern Irvin D. Yalom und Marilyn Yalom in „Unzertrennlich” (btb). Die beiden verlieben sich als Teenager, werden renommierte Wissenschaftler, bekommen vier Kinder. Als Marilyn unheilbar an Krebs erkrankt, schreiben beide abwechselnd über ihre Partnerschaft. In „Am Meer“ (Luchterhand) erzählt Elizabeth Strout von Lucy, die den Lockdown mit ihrem Ex-Mann am Meer verbringt. Aus Wochen werden Monate, in denen die beiden herausfinden, welche Art von Liebe sie noch verbindet. In Angelika Overaths “Die Unschärfen der Liebe” (Luchterhand) sitzt Baran 30 Stunden im Zug von der Schweiz nach Istanbul. Er und sein Freund Cla haben sich entfremdet. Während die Landschaften an ihm vorüberziehen, fasst Baran einen Entschluss. Die Titel dieser Folge: Laura Imai Messina: „Das verborgene Leben der Farben“ (btb), Irvin D. Yalom und Marilyn Yalom: „Unzertrennlich” (btb), Elizabeth Strout: „Am Meer“ (Luchterhand), Angelika Overath: “Die Unschärfen der Liebe” (Luchterhand) +++ Viel Spaß mit dieser Folge und wir freuen uns auf euer Feedback an podcast@penguinrandomhouse.de+++Unsere allgemeinen Datenschutzrichtlinien finden Sie unter https://art19.com/privacy. Die Datenschutzrichtlinien für Kalifornien sind unter https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info abrufbar.

Fuck The Rules PodcastSeason 4 Episode 16The Rev. Wiesch* is back in the house!This time around, John and I discuss just what the fuck is EMDR? Many misconceptions are out in the great wide world about this treatment, and luckily, John brings his experiences in participating and in providing EMDR therapy in this episode.PLEASE NOTE: We discuss the following topics that may be distressing to listeners - suicide, war crimes, sexual trauma, substance use, physical trauma, war/military trauma.More info John:John Wiesch is a Licensed Mental Health Professional (IA), Licensed Clinicial Professional Counselor (IL), and CCMHC, and works with individual & couplesin  therapy, ages 18 years and older. John specializes in EMDR, trauma, substance abuse issues/co occurring disorders, combat veterans, mood disorders, life transitions, LGBTQIA+ affirmative. John has experience as a veteran of US Military service, and working in crisis counseling for mental health in Emergency Departments. Website:https://www.ayaspsychotherapeuticinterventions.com/*Check out Season 1, Ep 17: "The Rev. John Wiesch Fucking Dropping It Like Bombs, Y'all" * * *Resources:Viktor FranklBooks:Man's Search for MeaningThe Will to MeaningYes to LifeIrvin YalomBooks:Creatures of the DayLove's ExecutionerStaring at the SunCarl JungThe Undiscovered SelfModern Man in Search of a Soul* * * Support the showWant more sweary goodness? There's now the availability of Premium Subscription for $3 a month! Click the "Support The Show" link and find out more info.* * *F*ck The Rules Podcast is produced by Evil Bambina Productions, LLC. You can find our podcast on Amazon Music/Podcasts, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify and many more!***Social media/podcast episodes are not intended to replace therapy with a qualified mental health professional. All posts/episodes are for educational purposes only. If you are in need of assistance for mental health services, please check with your PCP, your insurance provider or an online therapist directory for the nearest mental health professional.*****Susan Roggendorf is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor in Illinois and a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Iowa. In addition to hosting and producing her podcast, she's running a private practice as an independent provider full-time. Susan is a National Certified Counselor through the NBCC as well as an Emergency Responder & Public Safety Certified Clinician through NERPSC. When she's not busy with all those things, Susan is usually busy annoying her adult children or gardening.

Dawn and Steve welcome Phil Herndon of the Rivertree Center back to the studio to talk about narcissism. Phil uses a dynamic approach to help his clients recover their hearts and redeem their stories. His therapeutic approach is grounded in the Spiritual Root System™, and is informed by the work of Irvin Yalom, Curt Thompson, Dan Siegel, and Dan Allender. He also integrates perspectives from Judeo-Christian traditions, existential philosophy, and pastoral care. Phil works with individuals who have lost their way through addiction, anxiety, depression, struggles with spirituality, or burnout to walk them through the tumultuous and scary times that are so common to the human experience. Phil completed graduate school in 1992 with a Master of Arts degree in counseling and religious education. He served as a pastor in Texas for 15 years until joining the Center for Professional Excellence in 2005 where he served as Clinical Director until 2020. Phil became the Clinical Director and co-owner of (what is now) River Tree in 2020 and loves his role in developing, encouraging, and equipping the staff as they walk with people through their life journeys. Phil lives in Murfreesboro with his wife Sheila and they have one son, Luke.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Irvin Yalom 'Yas başkalarını sevme cesaretine sahip olduğumuz için ödediğimiz bedeldir' diyor. Bu bölüm başkalarını sevme cesaretine sahip olanlara gelsin. Kitap Kulübüne Katıl : https://superpeer.com/bilgesen/collection/kitap-kulubu-felsefe-edebiyat-ve-psikoloji-uzerine-okumalar ⁠ ******* Bana yazın: genelsesler@gmail.com --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/bilge56/message

The WTTA clinical team, led this episode by Dr. DB Palmer, explores the concepts and foundations of one of counseling's oldest (but least understood) orientations: existential psychotherapy. In this exploration, Dr. Palmer and the team discuss how to handle all sorts of life matters - including death - as viewed through the existential therapy lens. To learn more about this, we recommend reading books by Irvin Yalom, such as Love's Executioner, Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning, or anything by Rollo May.

En este episodio exploramos las cuatro preocupaciones existenciales fundamentales que todos los seres humanos enfréntanos en nuestra vida. También tendrás recursos prácticos para encontrar significado y autenticidad en este viaje vital. El psiquiatra y psicoterapeuta del que hablamos es Irvin Yalom. ¡Espero que te guste! 🤔 ➡ Audiocurso Gratuito: https://psicoguias.com/audiocurso ➡ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helenapsicoguias ➡Sitio web: https://psicoguias.com Si te ha gustado el episodio: dale ME GUSTA, déjame un comentario y compártelo. ¡Muchas gracias! Escucha el episodio completo en la app de iVoox, o descubre todo el catálogo de iVoox Originals

When I received an email about this new book, I knew I wanted to talk with its author. The book? The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control. The author? Katherine Morgan Schafler, a psychotherapist and former on-site therapist at Google. She's worked with many high-achieving women who are told they need to find "balance" - as if they're doing something wrong! Katherine tells us instead that what's important is to learn about the five different types of constructive perfectionism so that it can work for you! As she says, "You can dare to want more without feeling greedy or ungrateful!" She's an eloquent writer and speaker and it was wonderful having her on SelfWork as she helps these women exchange superficial control for real power.  Hope you'll listen in and learn! Advertisers' Links: Have you been putting off getting help? BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now! Vital Links: The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control: A Path to Peace and Power My TEDx talk that today has earned 100,000 views! You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, The Selfwork Podcast.  Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you'd like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome! My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life. And it's available in paperback, eBook or as an audiobook! And there's another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You'll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you're giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I'll look forward to hearing from you! Episode Transcript: Speaker 1: Dr. Margaret This is SelfWork. And I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford At Self-Work. We'll discuss psychological and emotional issues common in today's world and what to do about them. I'm Dr. Margaret, and Self-Work is a podcast dedicated to you, taking just a few minutes today for your own selfwork. Hello and welcome or welcome back to SelfWork. I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. I started this podcast now, almost seven years ago, to extend the walls of my practice to many of you who've already been in therapy and very interested in psychological and mental issues, emotional issues, to those of you who might have just been diagnosed with something and you're looking for answers. And also to a third group of you that might be a little skeptical about the whole mental health treatment thing. And even admitting to someone that you need help, that's a step in and of itself. So listening to a podcast, it's a real safe way to do that, right? Welcome to all of you. Y'all all know that I've written a book called Perfectly Hidden Depression, where we need to look at perfectionism as it serves as a camouflage for really a lot of inner struggle, despair, loneliness, and even sometimes suicidal thinking. So I was very interested to see a book that's come out talking more about the positive aspects of perfectionism, what I would term constructive perfectionism rather than destructive perfectionism. So there's a new book by Katherine Morgan Schafler called The Perfectionist Guide to Losing Control. And she says, you know, you don't have to stop being a perfectionist to be healthy. She says, for women who are sick of being given the generic advice that they just need to find balance, her new approach has arrived, and she's categorized these constructive perfectionists in five ways: classic, intense, Parisian, messy or procrastinator. Which one could you be? As you identify your unique perfectionist profile, you'll learn how to manage each form of perfectionism to work for you, not against you. Beyond managing, you'll learn how to embrace and even enjoy your perfectionism. Yes, enjoy. This book is elegantly written. I had to comment at the very beginning of the interview. I think it's one of the best books, at least self-help books that I've ever read, including my own. So Catherine's book is a love letter to the ambitious, high achieving full of life clients who have filled the author's private practice and who changed her life. Ultimately, her book will show you how to make the single greatest trade you'll ever make in your life, which is to exchange superficial control for real power, is what she says. So I was very interested to talk with Katherine, and we talked a few weeks ago, and that's our episode for today, Katherine Morgan Schafler. So this episode is sponsored once again by Better Help, because when you are ready to ask for help, maybe that will be the venue that you turn to because it is so easy, affordable for many, and very, very conducive to whatever lifestyle you are living. So let's hear from Better Help. BetterHelp Ad: I recently heard a fascinating reframe for the idea of asking for help. Maybe you view asking for help as something someone does who's falling apart or who isn't strong. So consider this. What if asking for help means that you won't let anything get in your way of solving an issue, finding out an answer or discovering a better direction? Asking for help is much more about your determination to recognize what needs your attention, or what is getting in your way of having the life you want better help. The number one online therapy provider makes reaching out about as easy as it can get. Within 48 hours, you'll have a professional licensed therapist with whom you can text, email, or talk with to guide you, and you're not having to comb through therapist websites or drive to appointments. It's convenient, inexpensive, and readily available. Now, you can find a therapist that fits your needs with better help. And if you use the code or link Better help.com/selfwork, you get 10% off your first month of sessions. So just do it. You'll be glad you did. That. Link again is better help.com/selfwork to get 10% off your first month of services. And now I want to introduce you to Catherine Morgan Schaeffler, the author of The Perfectionist Guide to Losing Control. Interview: Speaker 1: Dr. Margaret Catherine, I I, I was reading your book and, and I will tell you that I, I think you're one of the most eloquent writers that I've ever interviewed and I've interviewed a bunch. Speaker 2: Katherine Schafler Wow, thank you so much. Speaker 1: The way you use language, the way you approach ideas and the way you get them across is really, it makes the book not only very compelling, but it's it's just a pleasure to read. It's, it's a, it's the, it's very evocative and, and I just so enjoyed the way you think and the way you put things. So the process of the book was really good, I thought. 2: Thank you. That is so flattering. I will take that. Thank you so much. 1: Oh, good. So tell SelfWork listeners a little bit about you, who you are, how you get, you know, how you got to be an author, all that kind of thing. 2: Sure. So my name's Katherine Morgan Schafler. I live in New York City, and I'm a psychotherapist and, and I, I think I always secretly wanted to write, but it was never in the forefront of my mind because I really do love being a therapist and, and my private practice was the soul of my work and still is. But I just noticed so many patterns as, as I know you have, because I've read your book as well, which is also fantastic. It was hooked on that intro story, which is every therapist's worst nightmare of Natalie and everything. Anyway, I digress. So, you know, when it is your job to listen to the most intimate pieces of someone's life, unfiltered, uncut and totally honest, that there's something special and sacred about that. And you kind of have your pulse on the zeitgeist in the way that other professions don't necessarily allow. And for me, recognizing patterns across so many clinical settings, across so many de demographics, culturally, socioeconomically, and in all these kinds of ways, really compelled me to contain it somewhere. Mm-Hmm. , hence the book. Mm-Hmm. . So I wrote The Perfectionist Guide to Losing Control, A Path to Peace and Power, because that's, I noticed, universal. 1: That's my cue to show it. . Yeah. , yes. 2: So I, I really noticed universal plates around perfectionism that we are not talking about in commercial wellness. And not only are we not talking about them, we are talking about perfectionism. Like we fully understand it, like we know what it is, and you know, it's agreed upon in the research world that we're in the infancy of understanding this construct and that we don't even have a, an a formal clinical definition for so much of this stuff. And that really... 1: I noticed you call it an innate natural human tendency mm-hmm.Yeah. I thought that was interesting. 2: Yeah. You know, I think that it is natural and innate, and natural does not mean immediately healthy. Mm-Hmm. mm-hmm. , you know, like anger is also natural. That doesn't mean that anger is always healthy, but it also doesn't mean that it's not that there aren't wonderful expressions of that impulse within us. And that if we can just harness our natural innate human impulses instead of trying to eradicate them and get rid of them, which doesn't work, it will never work. I'm glad it will never work, because perfectionism is so powerful. Anger is such a powerful tool. All these things that we think are bad. Mm-Hmm. , they're not bad. They're powerful. 1: Yes. And they can be used in that way. You know, I, of course, I was thinking about my own writing and, and research and work when I was reading your book, and I really loved the juxtaposition of, of what your focus was and what my focus was. Which your focus is much more to a look at the, the beauty of perfectionism and celebrate it in many ways. And, and yet also look for when it's becoming something that, you know, like you said, all the five different types have their pros and their cons. Right. There are things that are great about them, and then there's things that are a little more vulnerable about them. Whereas my work is more talking about trauma and perfectionism and how that can, how perfectionism can at times, certainly not all the time be a camouflage of some kind, something that someone learns how to do in order to cope with the trauma that they have. So they mm-hmm. Anyway, enough about that. But I, I, I so enjoyed looking at this other side of it. And how did you come up with the five different categories? I mean, is that something just observation, clinical observation? 2: Yes. Well, first, let me say, I really resonate with what you just said, because my first job in this profession was working in residential treatment with kids in LA who had been severely abused and neglected so much so that they were no longer even in foster care because their family of origin had in some way not been fit to parent. And then they were abused and neglected in foster care, and then they became what was called wards of the state. Yes. And I saw so much perfectionism, maladaptive perfectionism of just shape shifting, of being around an adult and immediately trying to assess, "Okay, who do they want me to be?" Speaker 2: Who does this grownup want me to be? How do I, how do I best be whatever they need me to be right in this moment to stay safe. 1: Yeah. It's like a supervisor told me once, if you go into someone's home where you meet a family, always pay attention to the child that is quiet in the corner. . 2: Yeah. I put that in my book too. I had, I had similar advice from my supervisor who said, really specifically, pay attention to the children who are behaving perfectly. And I think that's a common adage in training and therapy, because, you know, kids have natural frenetic energy so often, and they're a little bit all over the place, and, and that's a good thing. But when they are trying to manage so much, they you know, fade themselves out. But to return to your original question, I came up with the five types because I was really trying to understand a phenomenon that I was noticing, which was, you know, I, I worked onsite at Google. I had a private practice on Wall Street. I worked in a rehab in Brooklyn in all these different, you've been , all these different settings. And I was able to take a client from my rehab and a client from my private practice on Wall Street and on, and see that they were both going to respond similarly to a certain situation. And those kinds of things started happening all the time. And I'm like, what is the tie that binds this true? Love it. And I thought for a moment, like, is it attachment theory? Is it this, is it what is happening? And how come I can predict with reasonable reliability, how people are going to respond to certain, you know, stimulus? And that's where the five types came from. I said, oh, it's perfectionism that is manifesting here, and it manifests in a patterned way. 1: So the, just to let the listeners know, the five types are: classic, procrastinator, messy, intense, and Parisian. And having lived in Paris for a little while I thought was, that one was very interesting. Oh, I think the French would love that they were some type of perfectness. 2: Well, you know, I I came up with that title because, you know, the, the beauty aesthetic for French women is so, so understated and simple in the sense that like, simplicity is the greatest form of sophistication. Like, it's very much signaling a a subtext of I'm not trying too hard. And the Parisian perfectionist really is embarrassed about other people knowing how much they care about something. Oh, that's, you know, and so they wanna be a little bit effortlessly cool. I'm not trying too hard. I don't care if you like me or not. Speaker 2: Meanwhile, they care a lot. And as I talk about in the book, that's not a bad thing. It's not a bad thing to prioritize connection and relationships and understand the power of those connections that you have. And that is what Parisian perfectionists do. Every perfectionist is chasing an ideal mm-hmm. . And we think of perfectionism in a one dimensional way, as in behavioral perfectionism. So I want everything to be organized and in its place when actually perfectionism is kaleidoscopic. And so perfectionism can show up interpersonally, I want to be perfectly liked by you, or perfectly understood, or I wanna be the perfect mother, the perfect whatever. And that doesn't look like I wanna act and say the perfect things. It's so much more nuanced. That's why I love this subject, because the person is holding in their mind a pie chart of what the perfect mother, let's say, okay. Speaker 2: Behaves like. Right. It's not that she never screams, it's that when she loses her cool, it's only to a certain amount. And then she's immediately able to make successful repair attempts and she's continually, you know, improving and getting better. And, you know, she's, and so when we think of perfect, we think of happy all the time, or never making a mistake, but perfectionism is actually very individualized. Mm-Hmm. , and it's based on the own person's sense of what is, you know, this shows up another example of emotional perfectionism showing up is like, what is the perfect way to feel when you bump into an X ? Right? So it's like, I wanna feel 5% nostalgic, 20% just indifferent, and I don't care. And like 50% confident, empowered, and, you know, I wanna forget about it 10 minutes later. And so, you know, that's where we get to the nuance of perfectionism is those, those little pie charts that we walk around with our minds. 1: I, I think that's great. And, and I'm not sure what I would do if my heads, I don't think it would be perfect, whatever it was. 2: We don't wanna find out. We don't need to find out. Right. that can remain a mystery for us all. 1: It seems more targeted or focused on women. You talk a lot about misogyny, and I totally agree with you. And, and yet how would men be? 2: You know, you're the first person to ask me that question, and I've done so many podcasts. Thank you for asking that, because this is something I wanna talk more about. Unfortunately, like everything can't fit in a book, but perfectionism in men, typically, and I, you know, this is like a heteronormative version of perfectionism in men, typically shows up in like, the perfect response for a man is to be strong, to not cry, to know what to do, and to be able to pretty immediately execute on those actions. Speaker 2: Right? So there's no allowance for inaction. There's no allowance for more feminine qualities of, you know, I need comfort, I need guidance, I need counsel, I need love, I need all the things that men need, but feel unable to either access or ask for, or even recognizing themselves that they need because we've so polarized what it means to be a man and a woman in this, in this ridiculous way that we all know intellectually. But when we are in that position of, of feeling in need, you know, it's hard to be able to operate with a broadened perspective on all that stuff. 1: I was talking to one of my own clients yesterday about asking for help, and I quoted your quote . Hmm. He said, asking for help is refusal to give up. And that's how I frame it. I loved that. So anyway, again, there are lots of little, no, not so little just very noteworthy and memorable.Is that a word? Memorable, things things, quotes in your book. 2: Well, I'm glad that we're including men 'cause people have asked me that question too. And, and what I've noticed and I, I certainly have men, many men come to mind that I've worked with that Right. Fit into this rubric. So, I mean, I'm sure you've noticed the difference between what happens when men cry in front of you in a session, for example. Right. I mean, it's always vulnerable when clients go there. They're meaning like a very emotionally like live wire place when men do it. There, there is like a palpable sense of shame in the room, you know, of like, oh, I am really out of control right now. I am really losing it. Mm-Hmm. . 1: Yeah. I, I I love to say to folks, I think tears are about intensity, not weakness. 2: Mm. I like that reframe. We believe. 1: So one of the things that I appreciated so much about your book is that you spend several chapters on what you can do about it, is what I say on SelfWork all time. What can you do about it? Yeah. And I wanna get there, but before I do, I think there were really in this kind of sense of celebrating, but also trying to understand what the underbelly of perfectionism is. You, you said there are two guiding questions mm-hmm. , how am I striving and why am I striving? Can you talk about that a little bit? 2: Sure. So, you know, mental health and being healthy is not like a coordinate that you just plant your flag in and say, I've arrived. I'm healthy now. And healthy versions of perfectionism and unhealthy versions, like everybody always wants to know, am I healthy, perfectionist or not? And I'm like, let me kill the suspense. You're both, I'm both, anyone who's a perfectionist is both Exactly. Mm-Hmm. . And so I encourage people to think of it on a spectrum, right? And so in instead of a categorical model of I am or am not, the questions of how and why help you really be a little more thoughtful about your level of awareness. So the how it am it skin, it's that, right? Exactly. Exactly. And so the how is like, how am I striving? Am I striving in a way that is hurting me, that is burning me out, that is exploiting people around me, that is, you know, costing me something that I value my integrity, you know, my health, my relationships with my family, whatever it is that's unhealthy perfectionism, maladaptive perfectionism. Conversely, am I striving in a way that makes me feel like more of myself, that helps me to feel alive, that increases my curiosity, that really energizes me and also, you know, tires me out because this is work, you know, but it tires me out in a way that feels satisfying, right? That's healthy adaptive perfectionism. And the why am I striving is like, why am I trying to pursue the thing that I am in pursuit of? Is it because I think achieving that thing is going to enable me to then feel a certain way that once I, once I get my doctorate, then I can feel smart or know that I'm smart. Or once I get married, then I can feel like a grownup or lovable or legit or, you know, is it gonna certify my belonging in some way? Are you trying to get a ticket of admission into some club mm-hmm. , or that's that's, that's unhealthy perfectionism? Or am I striving because it feels so good in the most, in the deepest way to find a pursuit worthy of a lifetime of striving, right. 1: And it's a process, it's a, yeah, you're enjoying the whole nine yards from A to z I mean, you may be tired when you get to Z but it's something that is, like you say, is feeding you at the same time that you are, that you are putting out that kind of energy and determination. 2: Yes, thank you. That's a great point. There's a level of reciprocation of energy, whereas when it's maladaptive and unhealthy, it feels like just hemorrhaging energy, just like, you know, such a cost. And so this most simple example is when people try to look their best, right? Healthy perfectionists might want to, some perfectionists don't really care about the way that they present, but if you're in a healthy place and you do care about the way that you present, you might decide to present, you know, as your best to look your best because you feel your best on the inside. And you wanna animate that and celebrate that and share that and let people know that. Whereas if you are in a maladaptive space, you do the exact same behavior, right. You're looking your best, but you're doing that because you already feel like you're at such a deficit and you already feel unworthy. So the thinking is, I better look my best because I'm already coming to this meeting, this marriage, this whatever it is from a place of lack. And so I need to compensate for that somehow. So I'm gonna, you know, try to compensate by looking my best. So it's very . Yeah. I mean, it's what you're talking about in your book of it's hidden only, you know? Mm-Hmm. only, you know, whether you are focused on looking your best because you know, you truly feel that inside and you wanna animate that mm-hmm. or because you feel a void inside and you wanna try to fill that. 1: I love that term "animate." I think that is very 'cause it does feel as if you are Disney your life in some ways. 'cause You want to, you're trying to, you know, Gordon Flett says, "The better I do, the better I must do."  2: And so it's just this constant cycle of, of of animating that, you know that way you want to seem Yeah, yeah, yeah. In destructive perfectionism. 1: Right. I love those two questions. Help me understand, because I, I got puzzled a little bit about, you talk about balance in a negative way mm-hmm. and I, I understood it. In many ways, it's, you, you know, you can't have it all. You, you just, you know, that's just not gonna happen. But you, you talk about balance is actually an energetic equilibrium. There's another one of those phrases that I loved, and because you've become, you've become being good at being busy. So can you sure. Yeah. 2: So that a little bit for us, yeah. Balance is a wonderful pursuit in its original definition, which is energetic equilibrium. Mm-Hmm. right. Balance in its, yeah. You know, original form is about how you feel on the inside. Right. Balance as we talk about it in commercial wellness has become a, about being good at being busy mm-hmm. mm-hmm. . And so we've really lost the inside of what balance means and we're operating with a shell casing. Yeah, that's an excellent point. Yeah. And so, you know, the people that are genuinely have found this sweet spot of their energetic equilibrium on the outside, they look like the opposite of balanced. You know, they're not able to juggle any task you throw at them. And, and they're not, you know, perfectly moving through their day with all of the, you know, it's not about that. And so it, that section was about the implicit sort of wild goose chase that we send women on, which is, you know what, you know what your problem is, you are not balanced enough. Yeah. Let me help you to be balanced. Do this, say this mantra in the morning and buy this like Instapot so that you can make quinoa, , and you know get this app that's gonna help you to learn French, because balanced people are really cultured and travel enough and all this stuff. And it's like, just becomes another another achievement. You must, but now I must achieve balance. Yeah. And you know, I talk about it in the book, like when we were all young girls, we were told that the story that a prince was gonna come and rescue us, right? And that if we just make the most out of being trapped or kidnapped or, you know, being an orphan or whatever travesty that we're in and do what is good and virtuous, then one day the prince will come and save us and we will live as this story goes happily ever after. And now as adult women, we are being sold that same exact story. And the prince has been replaced by this idea of balance that is so superficial, it's not real, and it never arrives. It's like, balance is always, oh, after the holidays I'll, I'll find balance. Oh, this is such a stressful week at work. I can't wait till Saturday. I'm gonna, you know, what I'm gonna have, get level set on Saturday. And then it's always in the future. And it never comes. And, and we don't notice that it never comes because as women, we are too busy blaming ourselves for it's delay. And it is not our fault. The reason that we never come, that it never comes is because this fake notion of balance is not real. It's just an idea. It's not real. Mm-Hmm. . 1: Yeah. It's a really intriguing thought. And I, I think it, it certainly I'm glad you said it and brought it up in the conversation in your book. 'Cause I, I think it's, it's something that maybe people, as you say, have swallowed a this com. 2: I used the term commercial a few minutes ago, this commercial version of balance. And, you know, you see people meditating on commercials and you know, making sure they take their, you know, all their medicine 'cause another medicine is going to fix that. Right? So medicine and yoga pants, the right outfit, , and a quick vodka martini perhaps. Oh, that too. Sure. 1: You said there are 10 changes in thinking that you can have and then 10 changes in your behaviors. So I would, I would love for you to just pick one of those maybe that you don't get to talk about very much. Mm-Hmm. , I just wrote a few of them down. Counterfactual thinking Maintenance and is triumph, difficulty versus challenge. And what I can't read my own handwriting, the getting connected Simple isn't easy, which I loved that one. Mm-Hmm. And then some of the behaviors are restoration, reframe, explain, and express. Do less than, do more. Those are just a few that I wrote down. But what do you not get to talk about that you'd like to talk about? 2: Oh, thank you for that. So I think strike when the iron is cold. Like one of my favorite strategies it's a phrase that comes from the Dr. Irvin Yalom who is, you know, a celebrated psychologist and writer. And the idea here is that the best time to address a conflict or something that is really challenging to you is not when the iron is hot. It's not in the moment that you're in the conflict, right? It's when the conflict and you have some distance between themselves. So the strategy that, you know, the way I applied it in the book is like, the best time to work on your maladaptive perfectionism is when it's not showing up. Yes. For you. It's when you're in a great space. Because when you're in a healthy space, that's when you feel most solutions oriented. That's when you feel confident enough to ask for help. That's when you feel, you know, that you have the most energy to maybe set or adjust a routine such that you are able to encounter, you know, your deepest self every day or your goals or whatever it is that you, you know, if you're anything like me can lose sight of really easily, you know, I have to remind myself of like my basic values every day just because otherwise we get so distracted and so striking when the iron is, is cold applied outside of managing perfectionism might look like, let's say you and your partner have a real hot button issue going on. Mm-Hmm. the time to talk about that is when you are feeling very connected to that person. Exactly. And when, when you and that person are laughing, you're having a good time, you feel safe together. And that's when you wanna say, listen, I, I've been thinking about something that I'd like to have a conversation about. It's important to me. Do you have time? Mm-Hmm. And energy to listen to that right now? Or are you up for that right now? Mm-Hmm. and the person will probably be able to receive that versus, you know, let's just say for argument's sake, the, the issue is one, you know, one person comes home late and they don't say that they're coming home late and the other person feels dismissed and disrespected and blah, blah, blah. Okay. So striking when the iron is hot would look like noticing it's seven o'clock. My partner said they would be home at, at 6 45, 0, 15 minutes. You're building resentment, you're, you're, you know, you're just having an argument in your head and then seven 12 rolls by and your partner comes home and you're just like, why didn't you tell me? We have talked about this. I wanna talk about this right now. You either respect me or you don't. And you just engage in this very unproductive back and forth, which creates immediate defensiveness. Nobody feels really safe and nobody feels open. There's, there's such a tiny, if not invisible or, or not even invisible, but just like doesn't exist opportunity for solution in those moments. You're just doing damage control at that point. Sure. Of course. 1: Strike when the iron is cold. That's a great, great way of putting it. And I've never heard it before. So that's that's, that's another one that will stick with me. I have sneaking suspicion. And then again, some of your behavioral suggestions are also really, really good. Which one do you not get to talk about ? Well so I mean, I think that if people understood that asking for help looks like not just asking for emotional help, that's actually a reframe of of perspective. 2: It's not one of the behavioral strategies, but I think it applies to behavioral strategies. Because if we're talking about the behavior of asking for help, being able to understand that, so often we don't ask for help because we think of my, of help in this myopic one dimensional way, which is asking for help means being emotionally vulnerable and having to tell someone something that feels private or scary to acknowledge. And emotional help is one version of help. I identify six in the book. There are many more. And so other versions of help include informational help. Mm-Hmm. , right? So if you, if you just started a business and you are really stressed out with the mechanics of filing your taxes under, you know, this a new P L L C as opposed to the way you've always filed your taxes in life, you are stressed and you need help and understanding, wait a minute, I don't need necessarily a therapy session about this. I need to talk to an accountant and ask them two specific questions. I need informational help. And so just being able to organize the kind of help you need and create buckets in your mind. There's tangible help, there's physical help, there's financial help, there's emotional help, there's informational help and there's community help. And again, that's just the intro class, right? , they're all different kinds of help. And so asking for help doesn't have to look like bearing your soul to somebody. You know, I, I'm thinking laughing to myself about this past weekend. I, I'm short, I'm like five three and I am too. Oh, . And I was at the grocery store and the thing I wanted Creme Fraise was way at the top. And I was standing there and trying to hold on and I thought, I'm just not gonna ask for help. And I knocked the hole, the shelf off, , it all kept rumbling down. Oh God, didn't I just ask for help? So 2: Yeah. I know there are so many moments where we don't ask for help for no good reason. And then there are other moments when we don't ask for help for reasons that we think are good, but other people, you know, they, I was just talking about this to a friend where it's like, you don't ask for help because you think you are burdening someone. Mm-Hmm. when actually asking for help is an invitation to connect and let people show up for you. And it also gives other people license to ask for help from you. Love to ask for help. Yeah. Be asked for help. It's like, oh, you see me as someone that can help you? That's very flattering to me. 1:  Right. A lot of people do. So well the, the book's title is again, the Perfectionist Guide to Losing Control, A Path to Peace and Power by Katherine Morgan Schafler. And I'm also curious, and I saw that one of your certifications was from the Association for Spirituality and Psychotherapy in New York, and, but your afterward is very interesting. Mm-Hmm. . 2: Yeah. I put that in in the last second 'cause I was scared to put it in because I was like, it it, it has God in it. Yeah. It has God, God language, . And I was really raised, not, not religiously and so to me, but I've always believed in God. Mm-Hmm. and it felt like a really intellectual book. And it also felt incomplete without that afterwards. So I just snuck it in there, . 1: I love it. I thought, wow, what, this is really revealing another part of her. Yeah. So it was and the way you feel about that kind of connection, how you feel about connection. Yeah. 2: Well, I'll tell you where that came from. I remember being in my apartment before I even had a book proposal and just having a ton of index cards. 'cause I'm old school and I like to write stuff on index cards and lay them out to organize my thoughts. And I was like, what is this book gonna be about? What is it not gonna be about? How am I going to structure it? And I just had that, you know, I call it in the afterward Waking Dream. I was sitting there and I just saw what I wrote in the afterward and it was just like a ten second thing. And I, and I was like, that is the spine of the book. And at, when I finished the book, something about it didn't feel complete and it was not including that little, you know, half a page afterward. And then I put it in and I felt such a peace in heart and mind, and I really love that part too. So thank you for, for sharing that. 1: Of course. Well, if for SelfWork listeners who are going to actually pick this book up, which I would highly recommend, I'm not gonna spoil it by reading it because I think it's just very, oh gosh, it, it evoked curiosity. It evoked gentleness. I don't know. It was just very, it was very interesting that you would, and I, I, I felt like you were letting us in a little bit to who you are and, and what makes you tick. So that's, that was really a beautiful thing to write. Hmm. Thank you. Anything else that you would like for us to hear about you or about your work? 2. Well the book is a conversation starter, and I could, you know, I think we all could talk about this in so many different directions and ways. And I continue the conversation on my site, which is Katherine Morgan Schafler.com, and you can find me on instagram@Katherinemorganschafler.com. And and I just wanna thank you for having me on. This has been such a thoughtful conversation and I also wanna Thank you. I have your book here. Oh. And I wanna, I wanna thank you for laying the groundwork. You know, you and so many other practitioners, you know, Dr. Brene Brown comes to mind, Flett and Hewitt, obviously, you know, all these people that really cemented how perfectionism can go wrong and how much we need to be mindful of that and understand that we need bumper lanes on this thing mm-hmm. or else we are going to crash. Mm-Hmm. . And, you know, the crash for perfectionism is very serious. And I talk about those serious risks in the book. And the reason that I was able to write a book about a sort of broader perspective was because the, you know, part about how maladaptive perfectionism can go wrong was so clearly laid out. And so I appreciate that and it gave me license to really explore. And I never get a chance to tell the people who wrote books. I mean, isn't that the best part of being an author is that you get to talk to other people who write other authors and about being a podcast host as well, so . Yeah, right. But man, being a podcast host looks so hard to me. It look, I mean, it looks easy on the surface, but just by being on all these podcasts, even just as a guest, I'm like, God, the level of technology, alone, . Well, that's when you, thank God for your team and your audio engineer . Mm-Hmm. . Thank you Catherine. So very, very much. My pleasure. Thank you. Of course. Thanks to Catherine for a wonderful interview. I'm so appreciative of her work and the fact that she also actually in the beginnings of the book does talk about how perfectionism can be destructive. So we're really more on the same page than I initially thought. Thanks for the reviews you're leaving for SelfWork. Wherever you listen, keep 'em coming. Thank you for your support and for being here today. And please take very good care of yourself, your family, and your community. Of course, our hearts are broken by what has happened in Hawaii. And so if you know someone there or if your life is affected by that tragic wildfire, please know that we are helping and we want to help. And I urge everybody listening, give whatever you can to the American Red Cross or the organization of your choice to help out these Hawaiians who have lost everything. I'm Dr. Margaret, and this has been SelfWork.    

We talk aimlessly about Greyson’s recent battle with some window blinds, progress on dear sweet Steven’s apartment hunt, Irvin Yalom’s “Love’s Executioner,” and whatever else!

Listen to ASCO's Journal of Clinical Oncology essay, ““Why Me?”, a Question of Opportunity,” by Simon Wein, head of Palliative Care Service at the Davidoff Cancer Centre. The essay is followed by an interview with Wein and host Dr. Lidia Schapira. Wein considers if patients are able to make rational decisions about their health when they are able to accept the reality of illness. TRANSCRIPT  Narrator: “Why Me?”, a Question of Opportunity, by Simon Wein, MD  “Why me?” A question is an opportunity. It is also an invitation and a revelation. A question by its nature reveals something about the asker. When a patient or family member asks the doctor a question, the challenge for the doctor is to follow up the question diagnostically, then therapeutically, be the therapy medication, or talking. Some questions appear mechanical, such as “Will I be able to drive again?” while others are more obviously self reflective, such as “Why did I get sick?” However, even the most mechanically minded question may be fraught with emotional significance. A recent Art of Oncology poem entitled “Questions for the Oncologist” listed a litany of questions the doctor encouraged his patient to ask. All, except one: “But please, don't ask me that one thing./Don't ask, ‘why me?'/You wouldn't like the answer. I don't.” Later, the doctor-poet provided the answer: “Bad luck is a second-rate explanation, I know.” The poem was sensitively, empathically, and thoughtfully written, apparently recalling an emotionally intense case. The poem reminded me of a patient I looked after some time ago and of a mentor past. An obese 60-year-old man came in. He was miserable and in pain. Ten months after definitive surgery and radiotherapy for lung cancer, the disease had returned with pain in his right chest wall. While awaiting full biopsy results, we irradiated the lesion and started nonsteroidal analgesics and duloxetine for the neuropathic pain (with the hope it might also improve his mood). Within 3 weeks, the pain had been significantly relieved although his misery was unchanged. We talked. He had been divorced for many years, worked in hi-tech, lived alone, and had lost contact with his two adult children. His parents had migrated in middle age, and he was an only child born in a new country. His parents struggled, and the family dynamic could be described as sullen. The family did little together and was silent a lot of the time. He recalls his parents, especially his father, as emotionally distant, involved in their own lives. Growing up he spent a lot of time alone. At university, he studied engineering and married his first girlfriend; however, the marriage fell apart as, in his words, “I did not know how to live together with someone else.” In his sullen home life, he had not acquired the skills of building a family nor had he developed a coherent world view. Despite good pain relief, his sense of brooding and demoralized loneliness persisted. Underneath was a seething anger. He kept asking “why me?” I assumed at first that he was referring to the cancer. He was, but not only. I consulted with a mentor, and he said he often answered that question with: “Why not you?” I tried it. The patient was flummoxed. It pushed him to reflect. With further probing, over time, his thinking changed from a closed loop of “Why me,” to “What is life asking of me?” And further afield he reflected on his childhood, his failed marriage, and estrangement from his children. Why did this happen to me? He shook off some of his depressed mood as he began to piece together his life's trajectory. In an insightful moment of acceptance he noted: “Indeed, why not me … What makes me special that I should not have the disease?” Sadly, there was no fairy-tale ending. He died alone. When a patient asks a difficult question such as “Why me?” or “How long have I got doc?” the psychologically astute analysis is, “Why and what does the patient want to know?” and “Why now?” Responding with the question “Why not you?” may sound harsh, even confrontational. “Why not you?” is designed to be challenging to shift the locus and focus of thinking from a passive and often ineffectual cry, “Why me?” Nevertheless might such a response appear insensitive and lacking empathy? Over the years, I have learnt that practically any question can be asked of a patient so long as it is asked for the sake of the patient, in an appropriate manner and in the right circumstance. In short, the questions must be empathic. Wiseman suggested the empathic response has four characteristics: to see the world as others see it, to be nonjudgmental, to understand another person's feelings, and to communicate your understanding of that person's feelings. Avoiding difficult and embarrassing questions may provide short-term relief but possibly sets the stage for later unresolved angst. I recently did a sabbatical in palliative care in Australia, a fair distance from the Middle East both physically and culturally. The openness and tempo of questions asked of patients and family in Australia might be considered brusque (or confrontational) and hope depriving in the Middle East. Although the influence of culture is pervasive, it is the individual who needs our help and who ultimately determines the conversation. Sometimes the individual is not open to talking therapy. It is an important communication skill to know when not to probe. “Why me” is both a deeply philosophical and a naive question. “Why me” addresses the question of justice and seeks an explanation on the assumption that ours is a rational world. However if a person thinks the world is inherently random, then such a question is naive and without intellectual value since everything is bad luck, like a random genetic mutation. “Why me” can be a profound philosophical question as the doctor-poet implied when he concluded: “Search for a better answer within, as I have. Unsuccessfully, so far.”1 The “answer within” bypasses the issue of whether it is a meaningless world or a god-driven world. The “answer within” locates the responsibility within ourselves to try to make sense of what is happening with my life. An answer within suggests a philosophy that we can make sense and meaning of my life, despite the world's apparent carelessness or bad luck. Alternatively many people, especially here in the Middle East, hold a theological belief, and the question “Why me?” is resolved within the theology of their religious beliefs. The believers are, in a way, lucky. Patients who ask the existential question “Why me?” can be challenged to reflect on themselves. “Why not you?” is a probing question that, with skill and some luck, may enable a measure of acceptance: “Indeed, why not me” (Fig 1). Dr. Lidia Schapira: Hello, and welcome to JCO's Cancer Stories: The Art of Oncology, which features essays and personal reflections from authors exploring their experience in the field of oncology. I'm your host, Dr. Lidia Schapira, Associate Editor for Art of Oncology and a Professor of Medicine at Stanford University. Today we're joined by Dr. Simon Wein, head of Palliative Care Service at the Davidoff Cancer Centre in Petah Tikva, Israel. In this episode, we will be discussing his Art of Oncology article, "Why Me? A Question of Opportunity."  At the time of this recording, our guest has no disclosures.  Simon, welcome to our podcast and thank you for joining us. Dr. Simon Wein: Thank you very much, Lidia. It's a pleasure to be speaking with you. Dr. Lidia Schapira: It is our pleasure as well. I'd like to start this conversation by asking our contributing authors to tell us what they're currently reading or if they have a book they've just read they want to recommend to colleagues and listeners. Dr. Simon Wein: So I recently picked up and reread The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas. I don't know if you've read it. It's a very long production because in those days they used to have a weekly chapter, weekly several chapters, and they didn't have WhatsApp and television and cinemas. And it's very long, but it's a wonderful read. I enjoyed it very much. The other book I'm reading now, more slowly, is The Nature of Natural History by Marston Bates. He is an American zoologist, and it's a wonderful read about his overall view of life, animals and plants, and I'm enjoying it very much. I have a great interest in gardening, and I think his views are very interesting. Dr. Lidia Schapira: That's wonderful. So let's turn now to your essay, "Why Me?" This essay starts as a conversation with an author who has published a prior work, a prose poem of sorts, in Art of Oncology. Tell us what it was about that read that sort of triggered you to want to respond and then clearly elaborate into what's turned into a beautiful manuscript. Dr. Simon Wein: I think what really grabbed me was the sensitivity of the oncologist as he was writing it, and the pain, it's a little bit strong, that word, but the difficulty he had in dealing with this fear that the patient would ask him, "Why me?" He wrote it so beautifully with such empathic sensitivity, that it really grabbed me, that question, "Why me?" that he was scared of. And it recalled for me, my mentor from many, many years ago, Dr. Wally Moon. And I remember as clear as yesterday, he'd say, "Patient asked me the question, 'Why me?' I'd ask him back, 'Why not me?'" So that's what it triggered off for me reading that essay, those two things. Dr. Lidia Schapira: Simon, you also make an interesting point that I want the listeners also to think about, and that is that a cultural context influences whether or not we feel comfortable even asking these questions, right? And you contrast your experience in a recent setting in Australia with your typical practice in Israel and the Middle East. Can you talk a little bit about that? Dr. Simon Wein: The older I get in this profession, the more I'm impressed by the importance of culture and yet how much we have to honor the individual and that ongoing tension between those two points of the compass. And I was brought up in Australia and sort of rather Anglo-Saxon and reserved in that way, and in Australia much less likely, in a sense, to be forthcoming and outgoing in what we want to say. And in Israel, people are much more open. And yet when we come to the consulting room in Israel as in other parts of the Middle East, indeed in Eastern Europe, a lot of the literature has demonstrated that we don't want to tell the truth straight out directly.  And in Australia, on the other hand, even though it's a reserved society, people are straight out in the consulting room. Bang. They'll say, "This is the prognosis and this is what it is." So I've developed this model for my own thinking, is that in the West, the individual is the final moral arbiter of deciding ethical behavior, whereas in the Middle East it's more the family or, in a broader context, the culture. And so in Israel, you're much more likely to speak with the family, involve the family, or they'll come in and ask you not to say this to Grandma, and you have to make up your mind where the individual stands and where the cultural family influences. But from my point of view, I still think that the individual has to be honored and respected ultimately in the final decision. Dr. Lidia Schapira: Simon, I want to also ask a little bit about your style and your communication style with patients. You are so clear in your descriptions to address not only physical pain but emotional pain and suffering and misery, as you call it. How do you sit with a patient and try to draw them out in a way that is empathetic and respectful, but also to help them understand that you actually care? Dr. Simon Wein: I'll take you back to another mentor I had. That was Bill Breitbart at Memorial. I did a two-year fellowship in psychiatry psych-oncology there many years ago. As I said, I came from Australia. I was rather green in psychological terms, and I used to do rounds with Bill. And I remember this one patient I had with Bill, and it was a middle-aged man. He was a working blue-collar man. And Bill went up to him, we were asked to see him for depression, and Bill went up to him and started talking with him, and within 30 seconds he'd started asking about the tattoos on his arms. And I thought, wow, that's fairly personal to get into that. You only just met the bloke and you're already talking about that.  And of course, from that I learned and with other experiences, that you can ask any patient any question so long as three conditions are fulfilled, and this is what I teach to the residents. The first condition is that it has to be at the right time. Sometimes you have to ask the patient privately and you ask the patient, the family, then to leave. It has to be the right you can't ask questions like this in the corridor, so the timing has to be right. The second thing, and this is I learned a lot from Bill and from my previous mentor, Wally Moon, you have to ask it in the right way. You have to ask with the right intonation. You could have said to that guy with the tattoos, "Wow, look at those tats. I mean, where did you get them from?" You know, that might have then made him shirk a little bit and stand back. Or you could have said, "Hello, Mr. Jones, goodness gracious, look at those tattoos you've got. They look very interesting. Do you mind telling me about them?" And so the way you ask. But I think the third condition for asking any question to any patient is that it has to be for the sake of the patient. It's not for me, it's not for anybody else. It has to be that in some way, this question will benefit the patient. The patient will respect that, they'll see that.  And so I remember once I wanted to go and take a photograph of this guy who had these enormous hemangioma tumors on his leg. And I went in and I felt uncomfortable. And I realized the reason I felt uncomfortable was I was taking these photographs for myself, not for his sake. Eventually, I spoke to him and he agreed. He was agreeable for education and so forth. But I think those three conditions, the right time, asking it in the right way, in an empathic way, that's a key word, empathic or sensitive or charming or pleasant way. And for the third condition, for the sake of the patient, and I think that's really, really critical in being able to ask a patient any question. Dr. Lidia Schapira: That is such a thoughtful, beautiful answer. And I'm going to switch to another topic just because I want to pick your brain and I'm curious to know how you would handle this. And that is, I know you do palliative care and you've clearly trained in the psychological aspect of serious illness, but do you think, wearing your palliative care hat, that cancer is special and that cancer patients are a special population when they ask, "Why me?" Dr. Simon Wein: That's a really good question, isn't it? In our hospital now, I started off in palliative care about 15 years ago. For the first 10 years, we only did cancer patients. I'm an oncologist by training. But now we're opening up to non-cancer patients. I think that in society there's little doubt that the myth of cancer being the same as a death sentence is very strong. There are many patients with advanced New York Heart Association IV heart failure whose prognosis that is much worse than many of our cancer patients. But cancer has gotten this flavor of death, of Damocles' Sword hanging over your head and that's that, and it raises- immediately goes to all the existential questions of meaninglessness and emptiness and death and fear and loneliness and all that, much more than these other ones. And it's not true. Cancer patients today may live much much longer than we once knew and much longer than many other non-cancer patients. So I think there is something very special about that.  And cancer has got this other horrific aspect about it which is that the body is eating itself up. Your own cells have turned against you. And I think psychologically, emotionally– Well, auto-immune diseases are not dissimilar in the sense of the body turning against itself. But cancer, it's a sense of the cells dividing and coming on and eating you up. It's got that mythical aspect to it.  Dr. Lidia Schapira: And if I may add one more thing, in my mind, it's also that cancer treatment is so grueling and awful and sometimes actually exacerbates the suffering. So I think that it's cancer and the fear of consequences and exposure to cancer treatments, would you agree? Dr. Simon Wein: A lot of our patients come to us, but they won't say to the oncologist how tough the treatment has been. They don't want to sort of feel weak in front of the oncologist they don't want to give up on that chance of getting out of the cancer. Because if they say that to the oncologist, the oncologist might say, “Oh, you don't want to miss this chance, but you're not good. But maybe we take a break from the cancer treatment.” But many of them are absolutely exhausted. Absolutely exhausted.  And then the other aspect of that, not just the fear of the oncologist, but also with the family. The family are egging them on, and I often say to the family, “Listen, guys. Mom is very, very tired. You haven't got the treatment. You're young, you're well, you don't feel sick, you want to fight.” The patient doesn't want to disappoint the family. The family don't want to disappoint mom. Nobody talks to each other and they have this dance of the macabre where nobody's talking to each other and the patient just keeps getting this treatment. I mean that's one of the things why I think it's worth confronting patients with the question, “Why not you?” If only to have some sense of acceptance of what it is. Now often in palliative care oncology, when you say acceptance, it means “Right, I accept I am going to die.” But I don't see it like that. I think if you have a measure of acceptance, then it will enable you to make more rational decisions about your cancer care. I mean how rational can you be in deciding about the cancer? We don't know. The oncologist gives you 30%. Well, how can you interpret 30%? I don't know. So the rationality is limited. But if you're understanding of what's going on, I think it helps you make more rational- to have treatment and continue or not. So I think that's why it's a useful thing to try and do that. But some patients don't want to, and I just don't push it. And many is the time that I've said to a patient, “You know, this is very bad. You've got cancer.” It's like they come back next week, “How's my virus going?” It's like ‘It'll just pass and that's it,” and so you realize that and you just continue on.  Dr. Lidia Schapira: And so my last question to you, Simon, is this: as an oncologist, as a palliative care physician, as an expert in communication and psycho-oncology, what do you say to your oncology colleagues who have trouble responding to the question that patients frequently ask, ‘Why me?' Dr. Simon Wein: Lidia, it's a good question because not often do I get a chance to speak to oncologists in this way. We're often kept out of the room, and when the decisions are made, it's very difficult to backtrack a decision about treatment. Very difficult. One, because you can destroy any trust that the patient will have built up in the system, and two, it's not really collegial then afterward to go and undermine. And so that's why I write lots of articles on these subjects, Lidia, and I hope that the oncologists will read them and I hope that they get published. I distribute them at work and sometimes the young ones will come and say, “You know, that's quite good.” What we're trying to do, what I think is very, very important, is to have the multidisciplinary meeting. We're trying to develop that now.  When I was in Australia, Peter Mac, we used to have them. And I think it's by a process of diffusion, by repeating the messages, the philosophy, the idea that we should ask the patient, get a picture from the patient of what's going on. Do they really want it? What's going on? What's important to them in life? Maybe they're satisfied with their lives. And then to have the balance between the side effects and the challenge of the treatment. The other thing that really gets me, got me on a bit of a hobby horse now, Lidia, is how much time in the last three months of their life patients spend on the road, coming to the hospital, doing blood tests, going home, another PET CT, another scan, and those are the last percentage of their life. It's substantial. So more and more we're actually doing telemedicine, as I'm sure you are. And at first, I was a bit skeptical about that, being an old-fashioned physician, where I think you should talk, touch them, see them, but you actually save a lot of their time and a lot of their difficulty and so forth. I think that's very good. Dr. Lidia Schapira: Yeah, both for us and for our patients, time is the greatest gift, right? And if we begin to think about it in those terms, time saved, time freed from hanging on to a test result, or needing to go and get another scan, can be an enormous gift for them as well. Dr. Simon Wein: Or an opportunity to live and enjoy life. And I say to every patient that every day you've got to find something to make yourself happy. I had this one patient the other day, the oncologist was mad. This poor guy's got a metastatic disease, his liver is not as good as it might be, and he was desperate to have a smoke of a cigar and a whiskey. And the oncologist said, “No, you can't do that because it could interact with your chemotherapy.” And so I broke my rule and I said, “Look, the oncologist doesn't really know what he's talking about,” and the guy promised to bring me in a cigar, which I haven't yet got. But anyway, I thought that was very sweet of him.  Now I just like to say one more thing. If we're talking about therapeutic relationships, I think that the best lesson I ever learned and heard was from Irvin Yalom, from his book Existential Psychotherapy. And it's like 40 years since he wrote it, and a lot of paper has been printed, articles have been printed since then. But he really was very good. He said we have to relate to the patient like ourselves. We've got the same existential problems that the patient has, you know, empathy and all that, but we've got the same problems. Theirs are a little bit more contracted in time. And what I like to do with my patients is relate to them in an authentic, real way, a genuine way, and they'll learn from that relationship how to live their lives when they go home. And I thought that was a really, really beautiful thing. And so he's got a quote there, which I love to share. And it's that “The relationship with the patient is that which heals.” It's the relationship that heals. And I think we shouldn't underestimate, and I think we do sometimes, the importance of the interaction and the relationship between the patient and the doctor. Dr. Lidia Schapira: It's a lovely way to end our conversation. Dr. Yalom is a colleague here at Stanford. He's in his 90s now, and he recently widowed. So that's a lovely thought and a wonderful teacher and mentor. So thank you, and until next time, thank you for listening to JCO's Cancer Stories: The Art of Oncology. Don't forget to give us a rating or review, and be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode. You can find all of ASCO's shows at asco.org/podcasts. The purpose of this podcast is to educate and to inform. This is not a substitute for professional medical care and is not intended for use in the diagnosis or treatment of individual conditions.  Guests on this podcast express their own opinions, experience, and conclusions. Guest statements on the podcast do not express the opinions of ASCO. The mention of any product, service, organization, activity, or therapy should not be construed as an ASCO endorsement. Show Notes:  Like, share and subscribe so you never miss an episode and leave a rating or review. Guest Bio:  Dr. Simon Wein is head of Palliative Care Service at the Davidoff Cancer Centre in Petah Tikva, Israel. Additional Reading and Podcast Questions for the Oncologist, by Barry Meisenberg Podcast Interview with Drs Meisenberg and Schapira on Questions for the Oncologist.

Danny has mixed emotions about Father's Day. He's trying to balance his needs with the demands of parenting and wants to hear more about fatherhood. He's also curious if being psychiatrists changes our views on parenting.  Michelle (34:30) is a newly minted therapist and has questions about the role of transference and countertransference in our sessions. She'd also like to know if we have advice for someone just starting out as a therapist.  _______ David argues that balancing personal and parenting needs can be especially hard when--like Danny--you're trying to create a different kind of life for your child.  At 08:33 we discuss the various meanings of fatherhood.  We discuss our personal experiences starting at 12:49 which quickly becomes sentimental. At 17:29 we discuss parenting as psychiatrists. At 24:50 David has 2 hot tips from psychotherapy that he applies to parenting.  David recommends (32:00) the work of David Lancy to get some perspective on modern parenting (http://www.anthropologyofchildhood.usu.edu). The books we mention at the end of Act 2 for the new therapist are: The Gift of Therapy by Irvin Yalom, M.D and Deepening the Treatment by Jane Hall, LCSW If you have questions or feedback please send a message (voicemail or email) on our website: https://www.callthepsychiatrists.com 

We have decided to call time on Two Shrinks Pod as our personal and professional lives have prevented us from being able to regularly produce the show. As we both care about the quality of the work we put out, we decided that if we couldn't produce something we were proud of then it was time to end the pod. Thank you to all of the tens of thousands of listeners who had let us into your ears and minds, and for sharing our nerdy sense of humour. Thanks to our collaborators and interview guests. It has been an amazing journey to go on with all of you.We will keep our episodes and website up indefinitely. If you want to contact us, we will keep monitoring our email twoshrinkspod@gmail.com and our twitter @twoshrinkspod until the end of May 2023. Irvin Yalom said “life is a spark between two identical voids, the darkness before birth and the one after death”.Listeners, thanks for making our spark burn that just that bit brighter. We hope yours burned brighter too for having listened to us.Amy and Hunter.

In this solo-pod episode, host Dave Ursillo breaks down some of the big — and daunting! — ideas that emerged in our last interview with best-selling author and thought leader Margaret Wheatley. Dave editorializes an overview of his understanding of a philosophical concept called The Three Stories of Our Time, which was created by ecologist, philosopher, and author Joanna Macy in her book Active Hope (revised): How to Face the Mess We're in with Unexpected Resilience and Creative Power (2022).Listen back to our recent interview with Margaret Wheatley on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or at TheNewStory.Is.Pre-order the updated second edition of Who Do We Choose To Be? Facing Reality, Claiming Leadership, Restoring Sanity (June 6, 2023)Also mentioned in this episode: Dr. Irvin Yalom and his 2013 book, Love's Executioner.Stream our curated podcast playlist on Spotify!Please rate and review our show to help other listeners find our work.Support our partners and affiliates for exclusive discounts:Bookshop.org: Buy cheap books and support local, independent bookstores with every purchaseFathom Analytics: Get beautiful, secure website data without trading your customers' private browsing data to Google and FacebookFlywheel: Seamless WordPress website hosting on US-based serversHover: Register domains with ease. Save $2 on your first purchaseMailerLite: A lite, powerful, affordable email marketing platform with premium plans starting at just $9/mo.Sanebox: Take back your inbox with machine learning to automatically organize your emails. Save $5 when you join.Trint: Turn recordings of meetings, calls, and interviews into transcripts with 99% accuracy.Affiliate Disclosure: Our show is listener supported through affiliate and partner links. By clicking one of the above links and registering or making a purchase, we may earn a small commission, which helps pay for the costs of our show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

For our kickoff episode of our 3rd season, we're honored to present this touching, illuminating, and entertaining dialogue with 40-year veteran therapist Bob Edelstein, LMFT, in which he guides us through life's big questions (AKA existential themes) through an Existential-Humanistic lens. Bob shares his amazing story of coming of age as a human and therapist in the 1960s during the modern-to-postmodern shift. Highlights include his life-changing reading of Carl Rogers' Freedom to Learn as a teacher-in-training, being ripped apart by primal therapy, becoming a therapist through “the paraprofessional route”, working in the Haight, making space around the need to achieve, training with Jim Bugental and LSD researcher Stan Grof, and being ok with the idea of dying. Bob is such an authentic human being in every interaction, and you'll feel that come through as he teaches us about E-H through his own transforming views. If you're a fan of Carl Rogers, Maslow, Jim Bugental, Viktor Frankl, Kirk Schneider, Rollo May, and/or Irvin Yalom, this is the episode for you.Bob Edelstein, LMFT has been a therapist and consultant since 1973, practicing in Oregon since 1984. He is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the states of Oregon and California, a certified Clinical Supervisor through Lutheran Family Services, a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy, a professional member and former Board member of The Association for Humanistic Psychology, and a founding member of both the Association for Humanistic Psychology – Oregon Community and the Existential-Humanistic Northwest professional organization.Resources:-Bob's web site: www.BobEdelstein.com-Bob is also the executive director for the Association for Humanistic Psychology. Their website is ahpweb.org-The website for EHI (existential humanistic institute) is ehinstitute.org-The website for EHNW (existential humanistic northwest professional organization) is ehnwpdx.org-Books mentioned include Carl Rogers' Freedom to Learn, Jim Bugental's The Search for Existential Identity and The Art of the Psychotherapist, and more Welcome to The Psychologists Podcast, where we talk about all things psychology through a very personal lens. Gill Strait PhD and Julia Strait PhD are both Licensed Psychologists (TX) and Licensed Specialists in School Psychology (LSSPs, TX). They are alumni of The University of South Carolina School Psychology Doctoral Program (Go Gamecocks). Gill is a teacher, researcher, and supervisor at a university graduate psychology training program. Julia is owner and therapist at Ocean Therapy in Houston, TX, offering telehealth therapy to young adults in their 20s and 30s who are struggling with anxiety. Check it out here: https://www.oceantherapy.net/

Jade Adgate and I both love to read and we love to read books that expose us to new angles of death, dying, loss and grief. Sounds miserable, eh? But it's honestly not. Through reading, we clarify our own thinking and values around these hugely human issues. Whatever you are reading, you can watch for these themes, and you can make it a point to read on hard topics long before you or a loved one needs the information. In this episode, we talk about 20 books that will increase your death literacy! ✨Being Mortal, Atul Gawande ✨When Breath Becomes Air, Paul Kalanithi ✨Giovanni's Room, James Baldwin ✨In Love, Amy Bloom (BLBD Podcast #43) ✨When My Time Comes, Diane Rehm ✨Last Day, Dava Shastri ✨Crying in H Mart, Michelle Zauner  ✨A Matter of Death and Life, Irvin Yalom and Marilyn Yalom ✨The Book of Two Ways, Jodi Picoult ✨The Spanish Love Deception, Elena Armas ✨On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous and Time is a Mother, Ocean Vuong ✨A Thousand Mornings, Mary Oliver ✨Late Migrations: A Natural History of Loss, Margaret Renkl ✨The Cancer Journals, Audre Lorde ✨Clear Cut: One Woman's Journey of Life in the Body, Ginny Jordan ✨Signs: The Secret Language of the Universe, Laura Lynn Jackson ✨For Small Creatures Such as We: Rituals for Finding Meaning in Our Unlikely World, Sasha Sagan ✨Death is But A Dream, Dr Christopher Kerr (BLBD Podcast #30 and #31) ✨With the End in Mind + Listen: The Art of Tender Conversations, Dr Kathryn Mannix Subscribe to the podcast for bonus content for only $7.99 a month! https://anchor.fm/diane-hullet/subscribe For more information on Best Life Best Death please visit our website at www.bestlifebestdeath.com Follow us on our social channels to receive pertinent and helpful resources on death, grieving, and more at: Facebook: www.facebook.com/bestlifebestdeath Instagram: www.instagram.com/bestlifebestdeath

For many of us, life is a process of minimizing uncertainty. We spend our days trying to eliminate uncertainty from our lives. Find the right career path, the right partner, buy a house, or at least find a sense of long-term settledness. Raise a family and put our kids on track to get into the right college, so they can start the process over again finding the right career, the right partner, and so on. The implicit idea in this is that there's a point in life where we reach quiescence, where all the big problems are figured out. But here's the thing. Life doesn't work like that.Life is not a problem to solve. It cannot be terminally fixed. Something can always go wrong. There's always the next thing. And so if you're living your life, even tacitly, under the assumption that it's possible to reach this point, you are operating according to the wrong model of the world.These are themes that I've long been grappling with in my own life, and they're resonant in the work of my guest today, the author and philosopher John Kaag. Kaag is a professor of philosophy at U Mass Lowell, but he has that rare quality of someone who makes his living as academic philosopher: he lives his life as a classical philosopher. To him, ideas aren't just for arguing about it. If you're getting them right, they should tell you something—hopefully something important—about living.He's a student of the work of William James, Friedrich Nietzsche, and Henry David Thoreau. His books include American Philosophy: a love story, Hiking with Nietzsche, and Sick Souls, Healthy Minds: How William James can save your life. A theme that runs through the work of these thinkers, and by extension John's own, is how uncertainty is crucial to meaning-making. In a way, once something has become certain in our own life, it gets taken for granted. I think if we're being honest with ourselves, we can readily identify this effect: whether in a complacent relationship, or in the pursuit of material comfort, or whatever it may be. Once it's all shored up, it no longer seems something so worth striving after that you can build your life around it. It's sort of like artificial intelligence. Whatever milestone AI successfully achieves, Gary Marcus will tell you that, well, that's not what AI really is.I think there's important in the idea that uncertainty is something to embrace, not just because it's a fundamental and inescapable part of life. But because it can also itself be a source of great meaning. If that's something you're interested in being more closely in tune with, I think you'll get a lot out of this conversation.At the end of each episode, I ask my guest about three books that have most influenced their thinking. Here are John's picks:* Waldenby Henry David Thoreau (1854)One American Transcendentalist's attempt to wring meaning from everyday life.* Thus Spoke Zarathustraby Friedrich Nietzsche (1883)Nietzsche's keystone… novel? meditation? confession? about an individual who is struggling to become who he is.* Man's Search for Meaningby Viktor Frankl (1946)The most recommended book on this show. The classics are classic for a reason.* Existential Psychotherapy (Honorable mention)by Irvin Yalom (1980)The 700 page version of Man's Search for Meaning. (Never heard of it myself, but it looks really good!)Books by John:* 2020: Sick Souls, Healthy Minds: How William James Can Save Your Life* 2018: Hiking with Nietzsche: On Becoming Who You Are* 2016: American Philosophy: A Love Story(I hope you find something good for your next read. If you happen to find it through the above links, I get a referral fee. Thanks!) This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit codykommers.substack.com/subscribe

Today, we are making invisible things visible for people who love to think about our human condition, the philosophers(!), and people with ADHD who struggle with the meaning of life, our purpose and how to make sense of our experience as humans. I cover: How my pursuit of a late-in-life ADHD diagnosis revealed some interesting (and obvious) signs of ADHD, from one of my philosophy professors, What “bibliotherapy” is, and how stories that are hundreds of years old, can help us with our mental health struggles, Nietzsche and concept of the Eternal Return, The art of taking responsibility for your life. Resources: Check out our vetted and recommended BOOK LIST! Bibliotherapy for all. Specifically related to this episode, I might recommend When Nietzsche Wept: A Novel of Obsession by Irvin Yalom. Learn about evidence-based treatment for ADHD, assessment and diagnosis pathways and find supportive articles HERE. Use the discount code ‘CCPODCAST' at checkout, for 15% off on DIY*ADHD. Looking for one on one support or treatment in Ontario, Alberta or PEI? Meet the Team. Find Christina (CRPO #003908): Website | Meet the Team | DIY*ADHD course | Instagram | Facebook | TikTok A gentle reminder that this is not therapy, and Christina is not your therapist. If you need more one on one support or treatment, please check out the links posted in the Show info and episode notes on the main podcast webpage. LISTEN OR SUBSCRIBE for free in your favourite podcast app: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Google Podcasts | Overcast | Stitcher | RSS --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/christinacrowe/message

"Cancer cures neurosis," is a quote from the great psychotherapist, Irvin Yalom, who (like me) got his start as a psychologist working with cancer patients. Among other things, he meant that a real problem tends to put things in perspective for folks. In this episode, I discuss how the core of neurosis is conflating a fake problem with a real problem, and how those who are actively dying tend to get very busy living. #cancer #psychology #health

The delivery of group therapy hasn't received an update or serious attention since Irvin Yalom's work back in the 50's. Because most therapy delivered in addiction treatment is group therapy and, as a field, we're finally talking about trackable outcomes, it has become clear that improved techniques are needed. Andrew Bordt, Executive Director for The Institute for the Advancement of Group Therapy, and I walk through the neurobiology of learning and how effective group facilitation can significantly improve outcomes not just in the group, but beyond as patients reintegrate into their daily lives.

This episode was recorded in 2021. Sarah Sarkis's introduction in her own words: I received my MA from Boston College where I studied Counseling Psychology. I then began my doctoral training at George Washington University with an emphasis on Adult Psychotherapy from a psychoanalytic perspective. Upon completion of my doctoral studies, I completed my internship and post-doctoral fellowship training at two inpatient psychiatric hospitals in the Boston area. There, I worked with people who were suffering from the most severe and retractable forms of mental illness. Those experiences taught me the deep and enduring value of comprehensive and collaborative care from a multi-disciplinary perspective. I carry those lessons with me to my current work in my private practice, where I emphasize and utilize my partnerships with physicians, naturopaths, and functional medicine doctors and nutritionists to provide the best standard of care. In addition to my psychology training, I've studied extensively the use of mindfulness, functional medicine, hormones, and how food, medicine, and mood are interconnected. My influences include Dr.'s Hyman, Benson, Kabat-Zinn, Maté, Gervais, and Gordon, as well as Tara Brach, Brené Brown, Irvin Yalom, Howard Stern, Steven Kotler, and Bruce Springsteen, to name only a few.

Een aflevering over de relatie tussen het leven en de dood. Over de verschillende manieren hoe we met de dood omgaan en over hoe het ons leven beïnvloed, vaak zonder dat we ons daar bewust van zijn. De vier verschillende houdingen waar we het over hebben netjes op een rijtje: - - Niet bezig met dood; niet bezig met leven: vegeteren - + Niet bezig met dood; wel bezig met leven: doodzwijgen + - Bezig met dood; niet bezig met leven: doodstaren + + Bezig met dood; bezig met leven: bewust leven met de dood Veel luisterplezier! Show Notes:

What's the danger of the Lone Ranger Christian mentality? Join Steve for a devotional from Blackaby Ministries International about standing with others. Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he fails, For he has no one to help him up. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 In addition, Phil Herndon will have a conversation with Steve about managing our expectations during the holidays. Phil will also give us insight into coping with depression and grief during this season. Phil uses a dynamic approach to help his clients recover their hearts and redeem their stories. His therapeutic approach is grounded in the Spiritual Root System™, and is informed by the work of Irvin Yalom, Curt Thompson, Dan Siegel, and Dan Allender. He also integrates perspectives from Judeo-Christian traditions, existential philosophy, and pastoral care. He completed graduate school in 1992 with a Master of Arts degree in counseling and religious education. He served as a pastor in Texas for 15 years until joining the Center for Professional Excellence in 2005 where he served as Clinical Director until 2020. Phil became the Clinical Director and co-owner of (what is now) River Tree in 2020 and loves his role in developing, encouraging, and equipping the staff as they walk with people through their life journeys.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

FEATURED GUESTS: Victor Yalom, PhD, is the Founder, Director of Content and Resident Cartoonist of Psychotherapy.net. He maintained a full-time practice psychology practice in San Francisco for over 25 years, and currently continues to see a small handful of clients, as well as leading psychotherapy and consultation groups. He has conducted workshops in existential-humanistic and group therapy in the US, Mexico, and China. He has produced over 100 training videos in the field of psychotherapy and continues to be inspired the many master therapists he has been privileged to work with, including existential-humanistic psychologist James Bugental, and his father Irvin Yalom. In his spare time he paints, creates metal sculptures, and tries to improve his table tennis game. More information on Victor and his artwork is at sfpsychologist.com. LISTEN & LEARN: What lead Victor into producing films for psychotherapists. The importance of witnessing skilled professionals as we develop our clinical skills as therapists. The role of mindsets and worldviews on the ways in which we practice. Why it is helpful to question historical ways of doing things within our field. The importance of the invitation within the therapeutic exchange. RESOURCES MENTIONED ON THE SHOW: SFpsychologist.com Psychotherapy.net Discount code for a subscription to psychotherapy.net is reina100 and will apply a $100 discount to either of their annual membership options

In this episode, Anna Mathur talks about the books that changed her life.Anna Mathur is a psychotherapist whose book 'Mind over Mother' was a Times Best Seller.  She has subsequently written two more books that promote mental wellbeing. She is a social media influencer who has taken therapy out of the clinic to the people who need it. She is a regular face on broadcast media, a popular speaker and runs her own podcast and training courses. Books chosen by Anna:Stolen Focus by Johann HariBreath by James NestorThe Body Keeps The Score by Bessel Van Der KolkDaring Greatly by Brene BrownThe Gift of Therapy by Irvin YalomOther books discussed:Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail HoneymanThe Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk KiddMadame Doubtfire by Anne FineLittle Women by Louisa May AlcottA Song of Ice and Fire by George R R Martin, adapted into Game of Thrones The Bone People by Keri HulmeShooters by Julia Boggio (forthcoming)Inheritance by Jen Hyatt (forthcoming)A quick warning: This episode contains a brief discussion about the use of psychedelic drugs as part of therapy. You can buy books mentioned in this episode on our Bookshop.org Affiliate page. (UK Only). By purchasing here, you support both small bookshops AND our podcast. Twitter: @twolitchicksInstagram: @two_lit_chicksTikTok: @two_lit_chicksEmail: hello@twolitchicks.orgWe love our listeners, and we want to hear from you. Please leave a review on one of our podcast platforms and chat with us on social media.If you do one thing today, sign up to our newsletter so we can keep you updated with all our news.Thank you so much for listening. Listeners, we love you.Two Lit Chicks Podcast is recorded and produced by Your Voice Here.Support the show

I wanted to finish the story from yesterday's video. https://youtu.be/Q6Ps4fkkdx4  All the same issues. How many selves have we? Can they be known? Who can know them? What can be known by dead reckoning and what are the parameters?  Love's Executioner by Irvin Yalom https://amzn.to/3Q0qhwj    Upcoming live Events Meetup event for June 7th: https://www.meetup.com/Chicagoland-Bridges-of-Meaning-Meetup/events/285810460/ Meetup event for June 8th: https://www.meetup.com/Chicagoland-Bridges-of-Meaning-Meetup/events/285810002/ Chicago Bridges of Meaning Meetup: https://www.meetup.com/Chicagoland-Bridges-of-Meaning-Meetup/events/285829004/ June 17 Estuary Church Leader's Meeting at the Prince Center: Registration Link https://forms.gle/j7Kk6ktQs8rzfuB58 https://network.crcna.org/crcna-and-synod/estuary-grand-rapids-post-synod-intro-ministry-those-edge-faith June 18 Grand Rapids Estuary Meetup https://www.meetup.com/hudsonville-conversation-meetup-group/events/285968736/ German Estuary Festival August 2022 https://bridgesofmeaningfestival.de/ Thunder Bay Gathering September 2022 https://events.eventzilla.net/e/consciousness--conscience-2138584969? Discord link. Good for just a few days. Check with more recent videos for a fresh link. https://discord.gg/fC3h7dVQ Paul Vander Klay clips channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCX0jIcadtoxELSwehCh5QTg My Substack https://paulvanderklay.substack.com/ Estuary Hub Link https://www.estuaryhub.com/ If you want to schedule a one-on-one conversation check here. https://paulvanderklay.me/2019/08/06/converzations-with-pvk/ There is a video version of this podcast on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/paulvanderklay To listen to this on ITunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/paul-vanderklays-podcast/id1394314333  If you need the RSS feed for your podcast player https://paulvanderklay.podbean.com/feed/  All Amazon links here are part of the Amazon Affiliate Program. Amazon pays me a small commission at no additional cost to you if you buy through one of the product links here. This is is one (free to you) way to support my videos.  https://paypal.me/paulvanderklay To support this channel/podcast with Bitcoin (BTC): 37TSN79RXewX8Js7CDMDRzvgMrFftutbPo  To support this channel/podcast with Bitcoin Cash (BCH) qr3amdmj3n2u83eqefsdft9vatnj9na0dqlzhnx80h  To support this channel/podcast with Ethereum (ETH): 0xd3F649C3403a4789466c246F32430036DADf6c62 Blockchain backup on Lbry https://odysee.com/@paulvanderklay https://www.patreon.com/paulvanderklay Paul's Church Content at Living Stones Channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh7bdktIALZ9Nq41oVCvW-A To support Paul's work by supporting his church give here. https://tithe.ly/give?c=2160640

​ @Matt Walsh  What is a Woman Interview with Dr. Forcier https://youtu.be/zdDB8wU73NA  @Sisyphus 55  Do We Want to be Free? https://youtu.be/ObCTx4UNwnA Love's Executioner by Irvin Yalom https://amzn.to/3Q0qhwj   Upcoming live Events Meetup event for June 7th: https://www.meetup.com/Chicagoland-Bridges-of-Meaning-Meetup/events/285810460/ Meetup event for June 8th: https://www.meetup.com/Chicagoland-Bridges-of-Meaning-Meetup/events/285810002/ Chicago Bridges of Meaning Meetup: https://www.meetup.com/Chicagoland-Bridges-of-Meaning-Meetup/events/285829004/ June 17 Estuary Church Leader's Meeting at the Prince Center: Registration Link https://forms.gle/j7Kk6ktQs8rzfuB58 https://network.crcna.org/crcna-and-synod/estuary-grand-rapids-post-synod-intro-ministry-those-edge-faith June 18 Grand Rapids Estuary Meetup https://www.meetup.com/hudsonville-conversation-meetup-group/events/285968736/ German Estuary Festival August 2022 https://bridgesofmeaningfestival.de/ Thunder Bay Gathering September 2022 https://events.eventzilla.net/e/consciousness--conscience-2138584969? Discord link. Good for just a few days. Check with more recent videos for a fresh link. https://discord.gg/fC3h7dVQ Paul Vander Klay clips channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCX0jIcadtoxELSwehCh5QTg My Substack https://paulvanderklay.substack.com/ Estuary Hub Link https://www.estuaryhub.com/ If you want to schedule a one-on-one conversation check here. https://paulvanderklay.me/2019/08/06/converzations-with-pvk/ There is a video version of this podcast on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/paulvanderklay To listen to this on ITunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/paul-vanderklays-podcast/id1394314333  If you need the RSS feed for your podcast player https://paulvanderklay.podbean.com/feed/  All Amazon links here are part of the Amazon Affiliate Program. Amazon pays me a small commission at no additional cost to you if you buy through one of the product links here. This is is one (free to you) way to support my videos.  https://paypal.me/paulvanderklay To support this channel/podcast with Bitcoin (BTC): 37TSN79RXewX8Js7CDMDRzvgMrFftutbPo  To support this channel/podcast with Bitcoin Cash (BCH) qr3amdmj3n2u83eqefsdft9vatnj9na0dqlzhnx80h  To support this channel/podcast with Ethereum (ETH): 0xd3F649C3403a4789466c246F32430036DADf6c62 Blockchain backup on Lbry https://odysee.com/@paulvanderklay https://www.patreon.com/paulvanderklay Paul's Church Content at Living Stones Channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh7bdktIALZ9Nq41oVCvW-A To support Paul's work by supporting his church give here. https://tithe.ly/give?c=2160640  

Victor Yalom, PhD, is the Founder, Director of Content and Resident Cartoonist of Psychotherapy.net. He maintained a full-time practice psychology practice in San Francisco for over 25 years, and currently continues to see a small handful of clients, as well as leading psychotherapy and consultation groups. He has conducted workshops in existential-humanistic and group therapy in the US, Mexico, and China. He has produced over 100 training videos in the field of psychotherapy and continues to be inspired the many master therapists he has been privileged to work with, including existential-humanistic psychologist James Bugental, and his father Irvin Yalom. In his spare time he paints, creates metal sculptures, and tries to improve his table tennis game. More information on Victor and his artwork is at sfpsychologist.com.Please visit www.psychotherapy.net to view the wonderful resources they have there which include over 300 videos of the prominent psychotherapist of the past and present. Think Netflix but for psychotherapist. You can save $100 dollars off an annual memberships at psychotherapy.net with the discount code : connection100Rather than having a set agenda for the podcast, Victor offered to have an open ended conversation with me and to explore and learn together, which was very exciting for me. Since the podcast is about connection it was fitting for us to explore topics related to psychotherapy as the content that served as the context for learning about and with each other. We start the discussion with me sharing my here and now experience of feeling nervous to speak with him, which is very unusual. I decide to share this straight away and Victor compassionately invites me to explore my experience together. 2:00 Victor shares the common expectation that a therapist will take away or reduce the experience they are having. Instead he points out that we can be with our experience and learn from it. 3:00 Tim express gratitude for Victor's work in making Virginia Satir's work available on video and subsequent work with other master therapists. 8:10 Victor reflects that he notices so much in what he's hearing and noticing with what Tim's shared that in therapeutic context would be available. He feels that psychotherapy can be a creative artful process.10:30 Tim poses the question of what aspects of therapeutic skills are relevant for day to day intimate and connective conversations to Victor. 12:27 Victor reflects that he often asks clients to reflect on what's happening for them at the head level and heart level. He suggests slowing down and tuning into ourselves and the other person. Attending to the words , and facial expressions of the other person as well as one's own body and feelings. 18:40 We talk about what ‘here and now' means in context of group and individual therapy. Victor shares that he is feeling engaged, and in flow and aware of some vulnerability and a desire to share something of use to the audience. 21:45 Tim asks about Victor's connection to James Bugental who was a Humanistic existential psychologist. Victor shares about his meeting and experiences of training with James. . 27:30 Victor reflects on his learnings with James Bugental. He demonstrates and differentiates some of the ideas and techniques from James Bugental's work such as searching that make it different from normal day to day conversations.32:20 One of the most powerful words he would say was , “And...” rather than letting the conversation be a ping pong match. It reinforces and introduces the idea that there's always more. This is one of things James used to say, “There's always more.” Each person is an arena of endless exploration.34:00 Victor experiential explores his emotions that come up upon his reflects on his relationships with James Bugental. 37:50 Tim shares a quote from James Bugental “ But early on l wanted to change her implicit sense of her task from telling me about herself to expressing herself. That's such an important difference. Then she makes herself an object of description. We're not dealing with a living person. lnformation about her. .. l don't like to get a lot of information about a client in advance. l want to know are they're reasonably able to maintain, and reality testing is all right, that sort of thing. But too much information will just cloud the screen for me. l need to be as innocent, in a certain way, as l can be for each person. l need to be as innocent, in a certain way, as l can be for each person. To discover this unique person. And that sounds very nice and humanistic, and it is. But the real value is, that way l get to know the livingperson, not about a person who has that name.”39:00 Victor reflects on the therapist role in helping the client to not objectify themselves but to enter more deeply in their experience and to be present (“search process”) 42:00 James Bugental also talked about ‘resistance' which is resistance to life. These are coping patterns created for survival, defense mechanisms. They work for us but also limit us. Examples, intellectualizing, or mocking oneself, or hiding emotions. Helping clients become more flexible with their coping patterns.47:00 “inclusion not amputation” another James Bugental quote . He also talked about the co-occuring counter balancing energies of support and encouragement or the ‘backstop' that urges them forward. 50: 30 Tim reads a quote by Rollo May and asks for Victors reflections. “....and the problem is that psychotherapy becomes more and more a system of gimmicks. People have special ways of doing their own therapy. They learn which particular buttons to push. They're taught various techniques by which they can, so that they can at least cure this isolated symptom or that. And that wasn't the purpose at all, of Freud and Jung and the rest of the really great men who began our field. Their purpose was to make the unconscious conscious. And that's a great--there's a great deal of difference between them.This was what Freud was setting out to do. It's what Jung is trying to do. It's what Adler and Rank did. These people never talked about these gimmicks. It just didn't interest them. What did interest them was making a new person. You see, the new possibilities come up. Then you have--then you change the person. Otherwise, you change only the way he behaves, only the way he approaches this or that incidental problem. The problem's going to change in six months when he'll be back again for some more so-called therapy.” -Rollo May52:00 Victor reflects on some of the context surrounding more technique based therapies and the importance of therapist reflecting on their use of self, to sit with difficult emotions, not necessarily always needing to ‘do' something to the client. The ability to sit with clients and to be with their emotions. 58:32 Victor shares about his orientation and perspective towards psychotherapy.1:03:30 We explore the words. “Self-Connection”

One of Craig's heroes is Dr.  Irvin Yalom, a psychiatrist and writer— Yalom's books inspired him in the early years of learning to become a psychiatrist. Today's story concept was sparked by Yalom's book “Every day gets a little closer—A twice told therapy.” To create this book,  Yalom asked one of his long-term patients to keep a weekly diary of their therapy sessions, and he did the same. He wove their two very different but fascinating perspectives together to write the book. Craig just loved this idea and thought it would be really cool to do the BFTA version of this. In this story, Dr. Erin Jacklin, a psychologist in Denver, and her 15 year client Sherlock tell their shared story…..with Erin first meeting Sherlock at the very beginning of her doctoral training, and Sherlock coming to Erin at a pivotal point in his life.  To create this episode, Craig asked Erin and Sherlock to not discuss their treatment history or what they might say during the recording, then he recorded Erin and Sherlock separately, asking them each the same questions, and then the magic unfolded.Dr. Erin Jacklinhttps://catalystcenterllc.com/our-team/erin-jacklin/Please take the BFTA listeners poll--we really want your input!https://bit.ly/3eQ8DdyBFTA on Instagram. @backfromtheabysspodcasthttps://www.instagram.com/backfromtheabysspodcast/BFTA/ Dr. Hhttps://www.craigheacockmd.com/podcast-page/

Does creativity require suffering?Rachel Moore, a therapist who specializes in working with creative people, has an illuminating answer to this question. She also talks about the connection between therapy and spirituality and why she compares Julia Cameron's book "The Artist's Way" to the Bible.Rachel mentions a couple of her psychology heroes in this episode: Irvin Yalom and Gabor Mate'.Learn more about Rachel's work at rachelmoorecounseling.com and connect with her on Instagram @rachelmoorecounseling.Rachel is also the cohost of a great new podcast, Therapists at Play.I'd love to hear your thoughts on this episode! I'm @YouKnowSandy on Instagram and Twitter.As always, thanks to Michael Kobrin for the music.Have a peaceful week!

What if the problem with the problem child is not as cut and dry as we think? What larger issue could they be pointing to?HONORABLE MENTIONS:Schedule an Energy ReadingSign up for the Free Readings Waitlist (and then reply to the welcome email to let me know you're on the list!)Dr. Irvin Yalom's booksYongey Mingyur RinpocheThank you for listening! If you liked this episode, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts. Throwing Light is for people who believe in the restoration and healing of the world and who aren't hung up on outdated dogma that seeks to dictate what that's supposed to look like. I'm interested in connecting with people who are actively working toward healing and restoration for themselves and the world. My hope is that engaging with this podcast will help you on your healing journey and motivate you to delve even deeper into the beautiful work you are already doing in the world.If you resonate with my work and want to stay connected, be sure to follow me on Instagram, or subscribe to the Letter Balm (my semi-regular love letter in which I share actual good news, personal updates, and a written reading for the collective). If you have a question, please feel free to email me at brandyglows@gmail.com. So much love to you!

Searching for New Year's inspiration, I spoke with Daniel Pink about his new book, The Power of Regret:  How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward — paired with what legendary psychotherapist Dr. Irvin Yalom told me about how he uses regrets of the past to help people live a more regret-free future. Actionable intelligence for 2022. 

A very special episode with a very special person!In today' s episode I spoke with Irvin Yalom, the author of best-selling books such as When Nietzsche Wept and Love's Executioner, the father of existential psychotherapy and a pioneer in the field of group theory.   We spoke about his latest book, A Matter of Death and Life, which he co-authored with his late wife, Marylin Yalom. Marylin and Irvin weave together a beautiful and touching tale of true love, old age, and a life well-lived. Click here for their latest book:  A Matter of Death and Life@YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheBiggerPicturePodcast@Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/biggerpicturepodbyroni/@Website: https://thebiggerpicturepod.com/ This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thebiggerpicturepod.substack.com

Counselor, Liberty alumna and assistant professor, founder of all the online CSI chapters at Liberty, and originator of this podcast Dr. Krista Kirk joins Robert and Jeff to discuss the most often asked question she hears from students - how do we navigate the moral issues that arise in counseling?  In the spirit of Irvin Yalom's axiom that we bring ourselves wherever we go, Dr. Kirk shares from her own theological perspective on how she navigates her identity in Christ as a child of God while also remaining focused on the child of God in front of her.  Dr. Kirk challenges us to remember that we can learn a lot from those with whom we may disagree theologically, morally, or politically while still maintaining our integrity.  Recommended APA citation example: Switala, R. P., & Mazzone, J. (Producers). (2021, May 18). Ep. 16: Bringing ourselves into the moral conflicts - Dr. Krista Kirk [Audio podcast episode]. In RENAR Voice. Rho Eta Nu Alpha Rho of Chi Sigma Iota, Liberty University.

Today we are delving deeper into the key factors that make groups effective. In this episode, Carrie talks about the uniqueness of group therapy, and the “bible” of group work, The Theory, and Practice of Group Psychotherapy by Irvin Yalom. The post The Magic that Makes Group Work appeared first on The Art of Groups.

Andrew Henry MA LPC and Paul Krauss MA LPC discuss many concepts related to Intuition, Stoicism, the Present Moment and the intersections with the practice of Psychotherapy. Paul and Andrew elaborate on the philosophy of Stoicism, Reality Therapy, ways to enhance your meditation or mindfulness practice, and methods for getting more out of psychotherapy. Andrew's book The Gift, an Unconscious Intuitive Mind! is available on Apple Books. Andrew discusses the power of the unconscious intuitive mind, and how it can help a person better understand them self, and those around them. Andrew stated: All people are born with a powerful alley: the unconscious and intuitive mind. Tapping into this vital internal resource is as important as knowing the route to your next destination. Andrew discusses the history of Stoicism and how this philosophy can help us decrease our anxiety and also help us be more present. Andrew also discusses how the concept of personal responsibility being grounded in the now can help a person in their journey. Paul goes on to discuss the concepts of Reality Therapy (William Glasser). Andrew also discuses the concept of cynicism as well. Paul discusses some existential concepts illustrated by Irvin Yalom. Andrew goes on to discuss the values of struggle in people's transformation. Andrew also discusses his first book and some exercises in dialectics that people can do from their home.  Also discussed: Neurobiology, Trauma, Jordan Peterson, Personal Struggles, Carl Jung, Micro vs. Macro, Control, Imperfect Systems, How to make a difference, Don Miguel Ruiz, Incremental Changes lead to larger changes, Myelination, Neurological Wiring, triggers, Relapses, Personal difficulties, Positive Psychology, Blame, Individual Strengths, Self-Reflection, Unconscious Mind, Adverse Experiences, problems that are out of time, Stuck Points, Crystalline Structures, Trauma-Informed Therapy, Schema, Self-Construct, the fantasy of the future and the past, emotional dysregulation, “time capsules”, ego states, different concepts of time, Alchemy, Dialectics, Mindfulness Skills, Imagination, Colors, Symbols, James Hillman, what a person can do at home to help themselves, amygdala, the negative bias, survival, adaptation, the prefrontal cortex, seeing a therapist, Hypnosis, and more.  Andrew Henry, MA, LPC is a licensed professional counselor in private practice located in Mesa Arizona. Andrew is an EMDRIA certified clinician, and Andrew has 16 years of experience in the field of counseling. In addition to being an author, Andrew taught Masters level counseling as an adjunct professor at Grand Canyon University in Phoenix Arizona. He continues to work in private practice utilizing Jungian methods, Hypnosis, EMDR, elements of DBT, energy psychology, mindfulness, and CBT. Andrew is currently open to guest lecturing on campuses via video, and teaching national and international workshops on the topics of Hypnosis and Jungian methods via video. Andrew graduated with a Masters degree in professional counseling plus the certificate in advance graduate studies in 2004 from Ottawa University in Phoenix Arizona. Andrew has an undergraduate degree in Sociology from Arizona State University in Tempe Arizona 1996. Andrew volunteers his time in Kathmandu Nepal providing therapeutic treatment. Learn more about Andrew Henry here:  www.CounselingbyAndrew.com   aehlpc@icloud.com Get Andrew Henry's Book Here. Paul Krauss MA LPC is the Clinical Director of Health for Life Grand Rapids, home of The Trauma-Informed Counseling Center of Grand Rapids. Paul is also a Private Practice Psychotherapist, EMDRIA Consultant in Training (CIT), host of the Intentional Clinician podcast, Behavioral Health Consultant, Clinical Trainer, and Counseling Supervisor. Paul is now offering consulting for a few individuals and organizations. Paul is the creator of the National Violence Prevention Hotline (in progress)  as well as the Intentional Clinician Training Program for Counselors. Questions? Call the office at 616-200-4433.  If you are looking for EMDRIA consulting groups, Paul Krauss MA LPC is now hosting weekly online and in-person groups.  For details, click here. For general behavioral and mental health consulting for you or your organization. Follow Health for Life Grand Rapids: Instagram   |   Facebook     |     Youtube    Original Music: ”Shades of Currency" [Instrumental] from Archetypes by PAWL (Spotify) "Nivedan" from Healing the Divide by Anousha Shankar (Spotify) “Geometry of Lawns” from Strange Geometry by The Clientele (Spotify)   Support your local bookstore by shopping at https://bookshop.org/ (You can order online from the comfort of your own home, while supporting local businesses near you).