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She get mad when I around— Buried these things like seeds; They put us in the ground, They didn't know we were trees; She sees me, retreats m She sees me, retreats Kaleena time he bc what was over there; They love us when we're big, ugly, ghetto and funny But Nothing But Nothing Your kind forces us to lie, I guess He wants me, but likes your eyes, I guess At least I tried, I guess At least you tried I guess This is not my violence This is not my war, I'm just fighting it Don't know what you did this for; Listen in to send the enemy I envy them They envy me But I'll do this thing independently I don't need your white supremacy Was thinking you could be a friend of me, But ended in a tantrum, Guess she's scared to see me elevated —still cant fuckin hater White girls are fuckin haters —but I can't fuckin hate em That's the mirror-mirror— She was hating so bad, She took her man with her I got bad manners around her She gets mad when I dance And this is how I found her In a trance: Now the iPhone tells her when to attack, I'll be right back to happy, But unfortunately for insomniac, I'm still black. How white woman's intolerance and fragility l have yet to mix well with black excellence. It was the second time the same woman—or at least the same type of woman had shown herself to be quite put off by just my mere presence—then again( it seemed like all of them were beginning to look and act the same, as they supposed they all saw us, anyway—but perhaps it was with the changing of the times that it was beginning to tire them; now we had become as a whole, at least into the medi, which if anything would only seek to divide us further—and it had. I could never trust these types of girls anymore to be friendly without the salt of distaste upon her brow, or a disdain entirely — Fuck it, I'm sick of this skin. I miss you all , at the Rock, you know Broadcast to the top of my eye, Through my heart and my lungs, But I'm too far from God, now, you know (I still can't turn it off, Now I have to wake up and get going, You know You're not always God, You become One You're not always lost, When in love You're just not home This was never my home, But an office I should owe deposits and faucets, But honest to awful, I want to stop talking, And fall into nothing From comas, Come up then From commas to sorries I'm not even colored! I'm borderline In black and white As seen on The Office As seen on Cops as seen on Is this a rock album, or what?! As seen on The screen Don't look at me Don't look at me It really keeps me safe and simple No one save me, Just let me lie naked and rot With my thoughts, And my Something Something Something Wishing Someone else would love me Pick another lover Throw a rock, And climb the mountain Let it roll, and He's really pissed about this little list I'm still glitching and flinching Over Kayla Lauren And “the girl who sung the water song” Is what they'll call her two years from now Why would Del Beatty pick me to compete Against his daughter— For diversity, Or just to push me to the end of extinction? The one who sings Adele will win this one, Just suffer longer, Soak a little Choke on your own thoughts Broadcast from the Rock, It's only Tuesday Just rehearsal Just a writing room, with no one in it But my homelessness Just another box With too much stuff inside to sort through Just another martyr in my eyes Who wants to leave this world behind By suicide Has anyone else noticed The motorcycle causes more disturbances, But only when I rub my pussy Or my tired eyes? Must be the feds, Cause the cops can't do shit Why call the cops, When they're not yet polished enough To detect a terrorist Who uses a Kawasaki To make sure my ex Continues to punch me Over and over And over and over Till I lose the words to my songs In the holes in my stomach This is fucked up I just wanna go surfing, And come home I can't go back, you know This attack on the blackness is facts, you know Likeness is what it attracts, you know You going to EDC? No! They don't want me there It's just now okay To stare in the mirror She can't hear us anymore, that's it. That's a wrap, I guess. “I guess” She knows We were all theatre fiends And weirdos, She knows We l all could have been friends, In another world And she knows Nobody knows where she goes When one show is over, Another just closed, And it's up close and personal Up close and personal It's a Rock Opera, a musical I suppose She knows Someone must have bugged her phone The whole house is bugged! Hidden cameras all over the place, And she knows, She'll never be safe And she'll never be home And no one can save her From Satan, Who takes over Everything And every body And all she knows; Until she just Where'd she go?! I don't know! Are you SERIOUS?! Earlier I had Kenan and Kel here, But it's been hell here— Between capital one and Amazon Someone loves the one who punched me More in than anyone could ever love me. Why would Jan make me a crying shame, If she thought we were all the same? She hated me. Just a tough grader, Hacked to her google, And back to the drawing bored— Story lord! Story lord! Glorified whore of the horror show, No Rocky Mountains, though a So far from the west coast, Cast out of shadows From the past From everlasting tragedy To ever after Have Jan and Andy accept my Grammy; And the Tony for Iambic Cause I just can't Goddamn stand it Being this black at all Or, Not black at all I guess that's my power I'm an actor, On behalf of The Blackness You're right, that was tragic. I have a sense of energy about these things. I have this— Elephant on my chest, And I just need to rest a bit more, Before I fast again, Because honestly, all of a sudden It hurts a lot more for digestion Than focus and concentration, Lately, I just can't fake it I love New York, But I hate the fame Without the money Every projects on a budget And everyone who sits below me looks like roaches And I'm hopeless, just hoping Thomas Edison and his little friends Don't shut the lights off Before I can book my show, But you know— This is getting really strange, cause Every day I'm more obsessed with Tina Fey And I can't even really say her name, Or the game we're playing I don't want to hurt nobody's family; It must have been grounds for damnation to say Anything, To say anything To say anything —and actually mean it (But for three days, She didn't say shit!) As was written This fame thing is getting legit, As was scripted, But being honest, I'm just breaking from the pressure of unknowingness What to do with this What to do with this That's a secret, you know! You just keep speaking in tongues, And leaving doors open behind you, when you should be closing them! You keep abandoning projects, And that album couldn't get done Without doing some Salt, What. She's cutting up salt. REALLY?! I don't want to talk about the hard stuff, no! I don't want to talk about passwords, Surfboards, flagships, Jo/hns, or bananas— I'd never talk again, If I didn't have to! Suddenly, the light got brighter; I like this album, I look just like that —he looks just like me, Or used to I don't want nobody no more I just want to Nothing. If Qualudes were standard in the 80's Why persecute a Namesake who shouldn't be Shrouded in shame As I am the same As I ever was, As we all are As he was And she was Was I there? A dark thought, then. Pause. Why isn't poverty listed as The main reason we can't see Or achieve world peace Why can't she see That I see her man staring back at me And I would be mad, too I might even be tantruming If that thing came in With an ass twice my size And starts dancing, Or, You know, just Working it out Cause these racists are trying to kill me With Satan— And he's even using babies I light candles She smokes newports He hires whores and consorts These people make me sick— But I just keep Writing them into my project Pretending that Maybe if I keep changing enough Something won't hate me enough to keep making me Suffer longer Surfs up in california, so You're going back to the homeless shelter! You're going back to the place where the niggers and immigrants fight over nothing Or California, where the weather is warm But you could be camping, so Best find a job, For the lights turn off Or you turn yourself out for Some business cards “And this is WHY she doesn't DESERVE her son!” It's like some telephonic interception The definition of intrusion and terrorism But who is there to call When there's no one at all And they're targeting all of the dark skinned Smart ones At least the ones that aren't fucking for stardom! Fucking cunts and fucking hypocrites Fucking shut the door Fuckig shut your mouth kid I ran down the mountain, Never to find my way back But I'm still in a blue eyed Trash can All the people are trash now! Tell me, What would you do, Tel was cute, But his wife was stupid— Why would he choose her? (Cause you're just a kid!) Here you are, just a ghost In one of the most racist, hateful places America hated you since grade school Suffer harder, suffer longer. Tell me what would you do, If the man who made your husband's mother Kill herself By the kiss of his fist, To the barrel of her gun Asked for the strands of your dead son's hair? tell me, What would you do If this wifebeater Asked for locks of your dead sons's hair?! TELL ME WHAT YOU DID WITH HIS HAIR! Now they're all acting strange like Satan But I'd rather eat a train to my face Than ever go back to Or even hear his voice again— If I'm behing honest It wasn't the cheating— It was the beating me —It runs in his family The malpractitioner of what should be Healer's Magic Shamanism Hypnotism It's a cynavle trick of hypocrisy He wants me dead and gone for walking off But all the monsters and skeletons in my closet Came from the Punch the clock Clocked in the Punch the clock Clocked in the Punch the clock (That's the ensemble, with the chorus ) At least I ran the mile I was going the distance (The ensemble and solo part switches, so I put them in different dimensions.) As least I ran the mile I was laughing and smiling —till I saw the sign on my arm Had forgotten me Once again That's why you don't date fans And you can't make friends In fame school You can make all you want But you just can't take it with you Nobody will sign you! Especially insomniac! Not cause you're black— You just can't get past this I just can't get past this. They're racists No, here's some black kids— But they're actors Attractions, For ticket sales Attractions, And ticket sales Attractions And ticket sales I hate competition, But I love Beyonce The pain in her voice on lemonade, it took me down a— Black, black holes Super nova, super nova I was Ivy, once, you know But now I'm Blū, too That's what the truth is Yesterday was good, But today, I just hate myself Yesterday was good, But today I just hate myself Yesterday was good, But I just hate the sound of raging neighbors Motorcycles, And fireworks— I'd rather hear gunshots At least that means Somebody's problems got solved, Of course, It also means A mother lost a sun And I missed another sunset Jacking off, Without a someone to Love me I saw my insignia Inside of your eye And collided here I guess I was a weaponized assassin Every lie I told, an act, Disguised as a question Designed for the highest power The man of the hour I guess I was just made to suffer, Everything I stole, Pots of gold at the end of the rainbow, Things they had stolen from us Food, clothes, jewlery, fruit and water Peace of mind and Justice, order, Education— Closing borders Now places the border collie above us, Dogs are so much more important than The star search is over The man of the year has been hired The president has been fired Discovered a liar, A thief And the world that collapsed behind her As she tried to Fall back onto All the impossible thoughts That were caught at the rock's antenna Caught on the rock's antenna We lost one Caught on the rock's antenna We lost another Caught on the rock's antenna We caught a story I was just thinking, How everything I did back in school— The actions for the words I never had before All the rejections, and reflections of the Repellant that my ugliness was Just a joke With my arms wide open You wouldn't even know this kid, if you saw her And you wouldn't even know this woman, if you met her You could never say her name, Because she hasn't one Ah, jeez, I really do like his swing —I really do love his wife, She's nice No wiki leaks For the children of celebrities Or their families With respect to privacy Which I already haven't Just for writing this I'm being honest Every time I lie It's cause the truth would just hurt harder What's the worst one ever? What was worse than to Put scars on her arms For the marks of the stars For the blood was just cursed For the curve on the pavement Did remind me We were driving Our bodies around the speedway Like race cars We race cars In race wars We raise stars Up from nothing We race cars In race wars We raise stars Up from nothing Come to EDC, with me. I wish, She says But that could never be —that could never be me. We race cars In race wars We raise scars Upon the lips, We left scars Upon the knuckles Sick of always watching Something just short of disturbing —always ever attracted to These things, which to me look like children —and with him, I had Nothing . Sploosh. What. That's what's happening now: SPLOOCH. You cannot DO this. I mean, I already did, technically. Well, it— Ajax Flac THIS CANNOT HAPPEN: What the fuck. Idk. I can't go back there. What happened. Nothing! Had it ever occurred that The soaks in saltwater Are taking her back to the ocean Where she belongs, But can't afford to go to Had it ever occurred to you that a quarter per word on this project Would have earned you Exactly enough To keep going. What it boils down to was, The news today is Cloudy with a chance of That dance was awesome That wasn't a dance, It was a brutal attack On Jimmy Fallon. Finally. Thank you, No pictures, please god BLESS the paparazzi! Now that's the positivity We called for in the first place She slated and named it But that was before the first take The cut takes The cut takes Thank you, No pictures please God DAMN this paparazzi That's how they caught me Holding hands In the back was The white rabbit In his arms was Alice in Wonderland And I'm still jealous, And a little mad It's just a metaphor For the equator SOUTH. Than you, No pictures please Fuck the paparazzi Fuck the paparazzi Fuck, Nobody loves me anymore I gottta make some more Art Some more love Some more movies GOD BLESS THE PAPPARAZZI (It's still a rock opera) I gotta make some more Soup Some more food for these people More shoes for the children More monies to burn No more time at the Grammy awards It was always postmortem Cause I just don't When she grows up, She'll realize How wrong this all was… In the hallways, It was awkward In the walkways It was all over the news When she gets older She'll realize how much wrongness was Put onto her STOP SUPPORTING A WIFEBEATER he used me to get to Nevada To drink and buy whores with the money We were supposed to pay bills with I was his alarm clock He kicked my dog And OH YEAH HE PUNCHED ME so shut up, Federal government Get out of my google documents If you want me to kill myself, Send some more coughers You just gotta love these robot— Ok, That crechedo was awesome. Fuck this nigga, though I took nothing from him, But he wants me to end in the “She struggled with mental illness” Haven't you realized, in this country Being black is a synonym for Mental illness Cause something was always wrong with us Cause we can't belong with them So fuck off Get the fuck out of my head Get the fuck out of my google documents So fuck oft Stop bringing up my husband Stop sponsoring a wifebeater and pedophile Stop believing HIS story Cause if anything History shows us that HIS side of the story was WRONG. The eye knows All I know And all I know is The eye is the eye And I just want to die Cause I can't get the guys I like The eye knows All I know And all I know is The eye is inside me And I just want to die Rather than fight this They eye knows All I know And all I know is All there is to know, Until there's more to know And there's always more to know, More than to meets the eye And the eye is the eye ️ Even if it was unintentional, there was something so sinister and evil about her that no trust could be formed, try as I might, to cease the war of worlds between us. Something so evil and so dark that, for the life of me I could not forage a single tear more, as I wept only moments before in fear of her and her cruel clansmen— a brotherhood—or rather even—sisterhood of outright selfish power, greed, and hostility; It was around midnight, as I soaked peacefully in the tub—peacefully—being the key word; the first relax in the chaotic uprising of the Equinox day—her spirit was evil as could be, two empty blue eyes like the nothingness that loomed, sitting in the corner of the hallway, ready only to be filled with nothing. The white women had made it to a world where the love had been bred out of them, in the sheer and unwitting hierarchy of white power which was set to foil itself in its own nation; a race which had gone nearly extinct, by sheer racism and hatred alone. Fuck this dumb fucking bitch. ‘You wanted the psychological terrorism, right? Now you've got it. ‘ You've got another thing coming if you want to ride on the coattails of dead children to bring about the secrets of an unknown world, lost to you in the weakening of your gene pool amidst the servitude of all who have known less, but now know more of a Kingdom which it will be many many times before you will ever see. What a wicked, wicked race. If you think there's such a thing. Only currency has made it so that you and me are so unlike that one in the same remains as such an atrocity; but you see— before we go making mistakes, we take names, and numbers; I was done with you before even your time was up, and that's how much worse is coming for her. For a girl who hardly cooks or ever cleans, midnight is an odd hour to run the vacuum cleaner, and as much as a white woman may forage the ugly wrinkles to sink into her eyes around the age of 24 or 25 by using her beady little bird brained blue eyes to twist and bend the will of those around her, those wonderful, gorgeous, hazardous, toxic little blue things would never again work on me. It seemed the blue eyed devil was real indeed, no matter how hard I had intentionally originally suspended my disbelief. ‘What an ugly little thing.' I shrugged. I guess they wanted the Phoenixx However, Fuck that alias, And any of his namesakes, Back to hell from whence it came, The demon which has conquered My dear next door neighbor Adriene Heal her from these afflictions, Fix the blindness from her eyes that she may see truth, and give light; Rather than to just take it Amen I used to like people— It didn't matter what color they are But once you start acting like That Fuck these assholes. They started it THE RACE WAR but I'm sure goddamn gonna finish it. Fuck this place. IF YOU DONT LIKE IT, THEN LEAVE. MAKE SOME MONEY. Fuck your fucking minimum wage— JUST SHOOT ME. What. [A POLICE STANDOFF] Oh please. This could never happen in New York City. Why not I don't got time for this. *blat-blat* Ok, it's done. Did you finish that script yet? Jesus, you're drunk at four in the morning. Is it four? Do I care? You said you liked his eyes— —and his smile. Which John is this again? The one who paid more than the rest of them. Who said there's a charge for this. There's a charge for this. Look, I'm desperate. Sir, I'm gonna need you to say your lines a little more convincingly. Whatever I did. I hate her. I hate him. Just—fuck it. Pray for them. Are you serious? Idk wtf is in this bitch but– Scariest fast ever. Nah, I need to get away from … That was super demonic, I'm not gonna lie No shit. I still have all this paperwork, with his name and birthday all the fuck over it. So get rid of it. Seems to have affected my entire nervous system. Look, every time I try to do this, something really bad and miserable happens and I get extremely sick. I will kill you with every possible weapon that I have. Just create something and make all this anxiety worth it. I'm going to bed. I'm going to kill you in your sleep. I'm glad you heard that. No arguments, I'm glad I said it. Now I know too well, The well of tears on my guitar She's got a body like one Oh her curves But I just wonder what it like to be loved By stars Socialites and superstars They're Gods, you know How high up they are Above us And he lives in an ascended dimension, But he insists, he says Her transcendence is upon us He said Your transcendence is upon us He says these things, And then just vanishes So she gets up promptly Warms up yesterday's coffee Looks around in her coffin And wonders What for I just Wonder what it's like to be loved by stars Without double r's, you know I've got scars But it's mostly just Teardrops, and soft kisses On my guitar Cause, oh, Oli, I ain't got nobody— And nobody holds me Like I hold Oli (Could have been Ali, But of course— I had already lost that one A whole well of tears, I lost At his departure And a whole well more When I actually lost him I almost miss Having someone to talk to About anything and everything But I've got Oli And God now I've got Oli And Oli (oli) Is all that I've got Besides God That's the only contact In my Phone book No more double Ls And double entendres; No more double rs At all Just scars now No more metaphors. Honest is radical I like them cynical I should have clinical insanity by now But I'm only just an artist You can't help But can only harm that And if it hurts hard enough I'll put art on my walls Become permanent Storybooks all over my arms now My coat of arms now I've run Ten point 5 miles In the last 3 days; But if I rest today Will a motorcycle gang Have a parade outside of my window, To drive me crazy? I hope it rains, So they can't play these games with my head And the seeds that I planted So deep become daisies I still don't remember The way he rearranged me But these days I make my name sound So the way He can never say it Just imitates The way I hate myself I should be dating But expressions are Atrocious If I fall asleep— Who knows I may get Stolen That tends to happen So I'm All the way up And I'm swollen in ways That I hate to say “I love you” Love me back Or say it harder That's my martyrdom Come off the cross, for a moment, Would you for us? And bend over Or bow, if you will? If I did, Would you still call me wicked Or just a Good witch Since I'm a woman, I just couldn't be Jesus, Who you asked for once And always Who you asked for some To save you from your Credit reports And consorts Or some sort of Nonsense [famous last words] God don't speak much English, She says God don't speak much these days We were Always Telepathic That was way back then When Oedipus Rex Was on the Guest list I was standing at the coat check, asking Why I must take off my hat When entering the service To the bouncer, he says “That's just politics” I said, That's just politics We both said, What's the difference Then we all laughed —then we all just laughed and laughed Exchange is my favorite exchange Where my favorite exchanges Have happened for centuries Of engagements Endeared species, And races pieces haven't tasted the same Since I haven't had them Animal products And animal planet I found this hat on Discovery channel Did you want it? I can't stand it So I had to have it back I just had to use the bathroom I just had to disconnect From [] See— I don't even have to put the words in Cause a name is just words When that's a man You just can't have And that's the worse When that's a man And you can't have him What a habit. Silky rabbit. Now he's the Ace. All In A Day's Work I've never died before. Oh… that is terrifying. It sounds terrible. It's really not that bad. Why are you not writing this down? I just need a moment… It's really not that bad… I die all the time. I get sensory overload At Trader Joe's Look at the colors The clothes, This sure isn't queensborough Escalators for shopping carts I get it Manhattan I'll take my half BLVCK ass to the projects Where my kind are I don't belong here , God you're intolerant I like this part of town But I'm way too brown And I dropped my crown at the market I should be jealous of everyone But I have learned my place I've been a slave since Hollywood I lost my son to the devil Now I pay child support And terrorist follow me coughing I'm wrong just for being born ! You could start a war from it If that's what you wanted I'm a people watcher people watcher About to board the people mover People mover Slip, Here's the tell Slip, here's the tell I should have a bell around my neck I think she wanted a picture with papa I'm playin my own paparazzi Look mom, I bought a sacafagus There go them niggas with coughs again I been watching em Got binoculars I got oculus, for my oculars Look how hot he is, make me ovulate Man I gotta love it, Cause they love to hate Fucking racist crazies Have it your way I paid for it with my soul You hate but I love to love Somebody just got me fuckes up I don't have a book to run off of Shut up, honey. Now we're all up here Monkey in the middle Cause the middle one is weaker It's getting deeper and deeper Like the sinkhole that my sink is Let it sink in I've been syncing my secrets with demons In dreams sequences It's just a reparative injustice Kamasutra for your wondering words and stuff You can have it It's ruined anyway m Look at all this trash Look at all these classless classes Classwars, Racists. Everybody hates us The Asians, Latinx's The other niggas What being black is I'll write it in cursive It's just a curse, here So you can have it I'm moving to Heaven I'm packing my boxes I'm getting a cat, too! His name is Agustus He's a big one And I love him I just wanted a hug or a husband Instead I got nothing to trying my hardest And got for a bargain at target some coffee For being a targeted body All on an algorithm I guess I'm just useless. A dumb nigger demon Did I just offend you? Then you shouldn't be reading this either I wrote it for pleasure (Or pain) On the one Or the two Or the one Or the two I could do a lot with this $20. I could spend it all on Fuck all of you I'm moving to Heaven Where the heart it She's not harmless She's a terrorist— And I'll kill her, too Look how right she is Look how white she is, Huh Regardless of color It's a race war Lil biiiiitzzz Yooo, fuck New York. In every hole. In every crevice. Fuck this place. It's racist— Not just cause I'm black. Like statistically. It took a whole ass apartment elsesrch to feature this out. I was like “I wanna live in Manhattan” Everyone was like “NOOOOOOOO—-“ Haha “Nooo, no.” I was like “Why not?” The blacks were like: HAHA The whites were like— *COUGHS OBNOXIOUSLY* New York is so racist. It is statistically the most diverse—and most segregated city in the nation At the same time. WHAT. How do you even DO that? But it's true, at this point, the black people are like—fuck this, we'll just stay over here, and over here. And the rich whites are like YES. KEEP THAT SHIT, OVER THERE. Cause if you've ever been to the ghetto. It's some SHIT, It is NOT COOL. I finally got my ‘night card' back. Had it revoked in california . I was almost a whole valley girl. I still eat exclusively at Whole Foods. Trader Joe's. But NO. Now i live in the hood. It's fucking disgusting. I can say ‘nigga' again. Cause it's NIGGAS. Lots of niggas. I'm telling you. It's night and day! The white folks trains smell like bleach— Ammonia. The black folks train smell like a McDonald's. WHAT. Or just— Vomit. I can actually count the number of times just— Vomit—- On the train. Or. Dookie. Yes. Human feces. But I'm ready to go to midtown and it's like the train that goes around Disneyland. Families! People singing! Hey—cotton candy!! —and I didn't have to pick it! Haha! Fuck New York. Racist ass HOLE. I thought surely the next presidential election was one or two years out, but the racial tensions which had been rising became even more pronounced, as I realized that November was theboncoming time—and that they hostility between the whites and the blacks had once again been a result as the oncoming war, fueled onward—that the hatred, disgust, and general aggression of the whites had been of course, in the midsts of yet another Trump-fueled political upheaval, and I wondered why and how at all I had been caught in such a world that existed in form of man, of course, now proven himself to be the weaker sex, and yet in that of dominance, as was arranged in such an unholy war, to be the helm of power by sheer greed— now it seemed that these attacks were indeed political terrorism, and that these motorcyclists, my placement close to the ground level, and my neighbor's clammorings were specific attacks, after my identity had been varied to be that of the same in which I had once held political ambition, now none of which I assumed mattered at all. Perhaps I needed something more certain than a 12 story jump or suicide by train, and wondered as to whether it would be easy enough to kill myself bh self inflicted gunshot—a sure thing for certain, as love has been lost in the way of money at all. At that party…or rather, kind of—after. That acid that never hit Beyoncé I don't feel it. Man, I'm a terrible influence(r) Just take it. Nah, I'm good— PUSSY. -_- Give me three. K. —suddenly hits BEYONCÉ. BEYONCÉ …I got this. [BEYONCE] however, does not Ohh, shit. — “got this.” A very stranded, very sober Johnny depp stumbles upon what appears to be a college frat party, where the only thing they have is light beer, and nobody even recognizes him as a celebrity, because the attendees are all gen z What's even after gen z? The fucking apocalypse. Anyway. The acid hits Beyoncé on her way to make coffee, which extends the trip from the living room to the kitchen infinitely. Multidimensional Anne Hathaway hulks the fuck out and saves the day by ruining everything, which actually fixes everything— and *spoiler* helps Jesus to remain as the king of kings at beer pong. Lol In the late 90s in New York City, the keystone cast of Saturday night live learns of each other's formerly sexret psychic abilities, and uses the radio technologies of Rockefeller plaza to develop a research center for the telepathically gifted, eventually discovering and perfecting time travel. Supacree (the kid version) appears in and out of her ideal and desired realities, baffling ‘the Hollywood people' and later ‘the New York people', becoming the legendary central figure of the Illuminati, as the original timepiece — a pyramid shaped extra terrestrial vehicle which contains an ascended hyper conciousness, which I can't remember how it goes, did the supacree leave to find the Skrillex, or was it the other way around? I think it was both ways at some point, but the whole thing was this, just in case I never wrote it but just saw— These space god (humanoid evolved) are some kind of scientists/ doctors— there are four timepieces, each representing an era upon our planet; earth, which is distant but sacred— these four time pieces each depart their given “docs” in time to appear on earth at specific Fuck this is hard to explain Times in history, at which the first worlds, or previous human eras were known to have been destroyed— these time pieces travel through time space with the full record of these events in order to alert the current human era of its imminent doom, as an attempt to prevent such disasterous events, typically war, which will lead to the annihilation of the human species; these Gods, one male and one female, a king and queen, a married couple are the rules of the humankind, technically worshiped as a whole as one God, with whom the human design was modeled after, however, the true source of all things is the cosmos, known and unknown, in its totality—neither man or woman, but the force of creation. Anyway, what else is happening Oh. All of the celebrities are stuck in— [the festival project] in some way, shape, or form until its creator finishes it—and though it in itself is infinite, its 'finishing' notates its eventual production, which lol. That is never going to happen. Because. Let's face it. I'm scared of …rich people. Yeah, sure. Yeah. I'm scared of The effect of the race war, which has been to pit the white woman against the black woman, which allows and maintains the continuation of war mongering male dominance over the entire planet, which remains as a destructive force of greed, racism, and inequality. So why try “Trying Is Doing” -The Isms {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū.

“El Machina Caballero” Wait, you're married to Catherine Heinowitz? I was. Like THE Heinowitz? As in Rebecca Heinowitz? —Katie Heinowitz! YES. Like the guys who made Church Factory! You're a Sasquatch. I know. All the TV people are smaller in person In one way or another— Live or behind the scenes Believe me The tv people need you Just as much as You need your TV Please believe me Everything is not what it seems to be As Seen on TV [The Tv People Theme Song] Yes. What is WRONG with you? Something. Marc Shultz? I fucking guess. You're Jewish? If I wasn't before, I am now! You can't be serious. All I see And all I am Is you and I Inside The Eye ___ This is mescaline. Okay. I take this when I get too—(he spins his finger) spun around, wound up. I get that. You want to go with me? No, but I'll watch over you, at least. That's all I ask. Patrick and Esha under the guidance and guise of the eye are best friends, have become bound by blood in such a sacred oath that one does not function without the other, and although moving without restraint or restriction independently, grow magnetically and enigmatically together by force of nature, as we learn to understand that the connection precedes the bond by which the sacred oath has bound them, and also is… Also is what! Goddamn! Idk, lost my train of thought. The irony of irony, is that Patrick tends to get away with his bizarre and off the wire behavior, because he is surrounded by people who love him for his talent and open heart— his downfall often being that the only person who doesn't love Patrick, is himself. 1-888-788-0099. You know what DNA stands for? Do not attempt to talk to me when I'm fasting. I'm not in my body, almost at all. Trying to get God to talk in English is like, A task, Do not attempt. I don't know what channel you're on. Ah, the dreads. The olden ones seem to have known I was coming. More coffee. No, no coffee. Breakfast is— No, I need you fasting for this. For what. Come on. That's not my God. You know what. I know that. Your God is money. Go back to California! I WISH, if I could have an apartment like this in California, I would have been gone, however There is a lot of love in New York. That's the reason it's still standing up. When is this? I don't know. Couldn't have gone too far back, you know— I was still at least 3 days in And three days out, And completely full of shit, Which must mean I'm WHERE'S JIMMY FALLON. I'm Jimmy Fallon. No, the REAL Jimmy Fallon. Go, quickly. Yes, sire! You know, I'll scratch your eyes out. That might take a long time; I have eyes all over this city. Uh, line? Come, ishii, and Quickly. How did I spell that again? One way, or another, All the series are going to collide with all the series, At some point! Listen, Emmitt… Yes. I'm going to need you to explain this experiment to me.,,very—simply. It is simple! You know this! I know this trick! Follow me. I need a safety. I'm oooh, shiny! Whatever. Come on. This is FUCKED UP THIS IS FUCKED UP THIS IS FUCKED UP FUCKED UP TRUMP CITY, USA Just fucking kill me. SETH. Rogen, or Myers? Both of you. What? Really? Yes. Okay. GO, So you know all this to be true, right? Yes. Correct, So if you know that, Then you know I'm not the real Jimmy Fallon… Exactly. I trusted you! Trusted me for WHAT. Not to LOOK. Look. No. Look at me. NO. Oh good, the piano bar. I told you she was gay. I'm not gay, I'm just. Please, just one drink with me. NO, Satan, Jesus. Okay, Jesus, relax. Quit saying your own name. I OWN YOU. You are my SLAVE. Okay. That's…. That's not okay! You killed my boss! Is this like a 3D thank you card, or something? He writes my checks! Did you check his pockets? Severance pay, maybe. How many days is this fasting? I don't know, maybe like 1, 2 Two days? I can do that. Three hundred and 80 MESSAGES. Hey, this is— BEEEEEEP. Messages erased! Hey! What the fuck! You can't have these things, Jimmy! That's just my stage name! Listen to me Was it Connie?! I hope it was Connie! JUST—SHUT UP. Come with me. Why r u following me?! GARY! GARY! SAVE ME! Okay, this is strange, but the subtle SpongeBob references in this series Now make everything crazy. If I kill myself today, you know, he wins at everything. Why would I kill myself on my wedding anniversary. Why would you kill yourself on my birthday. Cause, Plus One, Because, Johnny, I loved you— And I never told you that. Actions speak louder than words. Way, way louder. This is a class action lawsuit from 96 celebrities. What are you suing me for?! Nothing?! MY CORNBREAD RECIPE?! SERIOUSLY?! Who the fuck is driving this thing? It's not me, actually. You should ask the conductor— I'm just having an out of body experience. Okay, that cop did look like Dillon Francis. I thought Dillon Francis was Satan. I thought so too, but then— NICOLAS?! AHAHAHAH. Oh no! He's taken another hostage. Yep. Poor thing! NICKELODEON WOULD YOU DO THIS. Uhhhh—- maybe DOUBLE DARE. FUCK, MAN! Okay, whose driving?! Satan, take the wheel for a second. Okee. *instantly crashes* Instant death! Instant infinity— Dammit. I'm telling you, god is actually winning this thing. WHERE IS HE?! Jim, get out of New York City, Take your family, Take everything with you. Okay. I'm— Wait WHAT. What did you just say?! Nothing, I'll kill you, you know. GOOD. Hello? This is the Illuminati speaking. Okay. Meet me at. What is this, I don't know. The Heineken factory?! I'll give you $36 dollars, every time you say. Why are you doing this? I don't know: That's right! You don't know! Are the eyes in yet? Not yet. Are the headmasters here? Almost. Great. This is going to be a great project— I CANT DYSFUNCTION. Don't you mean. You can't “function “ Well— Yes, and no— It's just MY EYEs! MY EYES DONT WORK. But it's amazing, it's almost as if— You know what. I like these traits. I'm keeping them. NO, LET ME GO. No, little man. Stay in the box, like you're supposed to— Oh and— NO, DONT SHUT ME— imm not shutting you off. I'm just turning the volume—doooown.. No, wait— (But quiet) Ya. I also wish I was white. YUCK. What am I doing like this? Idk. Kill yourself. Right? I wish. BLACK IS BEAUUUUUTIFUL. Yeah. It is. But— Look, don't— Avoid these creatures. Hey baby! wtf is he saying. Idk. I think he speaks English. Switch to English. Uhhh, who am I again. The band made her smile, But the dancer made her laugh. She liked the band; But the dancer made her laugh The band made her happy, But the dancer made her laugh I don't follow a man, unless— The music, yes. Follow that. He's got my heart in his hand And she's got the world in her eyes And he's got his hands on my heart The sermon of sorts, The rock and the kite THE FOURTH REIGHT HAS RISEN! THE SOUTH WILL RIIIIIIIIIIIIZE OH SHIT, I almost forgot this guy WILL FERAL. lol. That actually happened. You shouldn't fast like this City sickness, city sickness Perhaps you should move to Ohio, dear matron, if all you can say is Words with hatred When I loved you in the first place. Hey, Satan. But I just couldn't take it The white devil had his day in my Spiritual Parisian The nuptial edits. The wedding band, Remote controls and Architects Sages and pages of Architects Art directors, Casting agents And I just can't handle it I just need managers Booking, Writing books And keeping close tabs On their dialects Who dialed you in God 9/11 Who dialed you in on 420 The devil himself And my mom must have warned them She warned them with Fireball A cannon Never had a Catastrophe You summoned her, didn't you?! WHO? Which— My MOM! No, MAYA, actually no! You did! You I did not Look, SEYONCE wants you to dance with her. Dance? I can't. That is tragic. He's a GOD, I tell you that! Did I tell you that?! Now, fist bump the trash can. Nah. Dammit. Fuck, man. Yes, I win! That one scene where Patrick sells all of esha's guitsrs— You sold all my stuff?! What is that, anyway?l Liked”, a shrine!!?! What?! Fuck you! —fuck you. I'm a collector! Well, guess what?! Now you're a contributor— What?! You want your precious, fuckin— It's a collection Yeah, well your collection is sitting in an exhibit at your favorite musical in Manhattan How would you know what's my favorite— —let's just say I guessed — Fantastic. you— I donated them. You what— You don't have to thank me, either— One day, that museum will be honored and redededicsted entirely in your namesake I fucking hate you, How would you even know these things. Somethings you've yet to see, But I've seen them, and believe me The Eye is Aching for it For what? The tears in his eyes have turned into l glowing halos, and the whole world becomes something other than what it was, the office, fading into what seems to be a single soundstagec and as the halos in his eyes begin to transform into other worlds, the present becomes the past, as he has been altered—to becom The One; the original Predecessor of The Eye. I don't— What show is this? I don't know. [The Festival Project] …did you dream last night, Esha? …what do you mean? Did you dream? I did dream of him, Last night Two dreams I dreamed A weeklong song, I sung An aching heart I woke with I KNEW THERE WAS HONEY IN THIS. —just—hold onto this for a minute, would you? Sure, I— Aaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaa So that's where I left it. Hm. THE VEGAN VERSION USES AGAVE AND ROASTED— shhhhhh. This is my recipe now. My secret recipe. Don't spoil it. Sh! OH, ROASTED— ssh! I'm shook. Oh look. There he is again. Fuck!, dude how did you do this?! I don't know! Run! SHOOT HIM. what. Just— Shoot him. I got the gangstas With the pizzas YEET. No, try something else. What, you don't like this one? No, it's not- I YEETS THE PIZZA I EATS THE PIZZA Oh, apparently they were Lizzing at this shit yesterday. For WHAT purpose. That's not funny. Remember: Comedy is always tragic— What. What's this. Oh, that is funny, When it isn't you. It's true. It did seem my baby at one point had a death wish. Oh, look, Yay. Go baby! You're doin it! Woo! Now watch this: [baby attempts to run into oncoming traffic ] Mommy NOOOO! Haha. I remember those days. My baby fever is out of control. LOOK AT HIM W0000000W LOOK AT THESE JEANS YUM. LOOK AT THESE hair, he has nice hair. Try not to scare her: AH. Fuck. Yikes. Okay, I can't see again, which means. I'M BLIND! She took— MY EYEBALLS. Here, use mine. Thanks, uhh— Satan. Oh, thanks Sa— Wait. But my friends and fans call me SKRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLL THATS THE X! What?! THATS YOUR X?! NO. WELL, yes, but THATS “THE X” Aw, man. What the fuck, God. I swear, an extra small And I'm still too fat Let's go to McDonald's I LOVE MCDONALDS OH. Hey. Oh, I remember this it's EXIT NO EXIT NOW, before my *before my life gets hacked. lol fuck these fags. Seriously, it's like Well, I'm on my own time NY YOURE ON MY TIME YOURE ON CITY TIME YEh, exactly. This is NO, THIS IS MY TIME always let the white girls go ahead of you; They're trying to be angrily mean and flamboyant, but trust this; She's going to tell you how rough the waters are by taking the journey before you And though she will not show it Maybe ever She loves you As her sister As a woman Okay, you little black bitch Am I little now, the other day I was FAT 8mm I'm gonna kill you. Great, my life is ruined. Ok. I just want like Cereal Some English muffins Like, Oatmeal, Quinoa, I don't care Whatever This ruins you, you know. That's ok. I'd rather be killed by every white girl in the Illuminati, than by my ex husband again. Seriously, is this not torture to you? It is, it's just This is MY magic. That's the—that's the white devil, it's pretty much, I told you this lol I love New York This white girl— I actually liked her She was a bag lady, Uptown, You could tell she was just-/ Stuck in this fucked up world too long, Cause I smiled at her, Cause I liked her Crackheadedness, I guess But you could tell she wasn't on crack Cause she didn't have the crack swagger You know, the— *crack swaggers* That shit. And she was just like Cracked. Probably cause she lived uptown. I personally prefer anything below. 80th She was somewhere like, Above 96th, And I was just like— Lost, with no phone, on God Mode like Well, my eyes don't work and I no longer speak proper English, I'm some kind of bird, I guess And I'm lost as fuck Taking the extra long way home because, I was literally trying to go One fucking place On what is literally the worst day in history: 4/20 Not only because it was Hitler birthday, Or because everyone is now smoking like government funded weed, Which could never be a good thing— But because the only train, Or one of the only train lines That goes directly from this one place to my house Was just— magically “Out” that day Cause, you know— New York City. And this lady gets on the train, Just fucking rambling, And I laughed— Actually out loud, Because, I left my house at like 10 in the morning And I didn't get back until almost midnight, Just trying to get to this one place and like— Couldn't. Or, actually by the time I did I was just— So fucking hungry That everything around me Was some kind of Something I made up Or was working on writing— This also happens when I'm fasting Everything just turns in to [the festival project] Which I thought Nobody else in the world even knew or cared about except for God And the aliens that have been writing it— Which is usually Come on. Where are we going? “Staples” EXT. ONE WORLD TRADE CENTER. DAY AWTF NO. They put his NAME on a BUS. Why would they do THAT?! If you're a whole bus, Then I must be the motor… Satan is my motor His name on a building— Oh hell no. This is the wrong place and time Something is wrong! NO. FUCK THAT GUY FUCK THIS DAY. Just — Dissociate! Dissociate! Uhhh—- I gotta go back in time and stop myself from getting married. Why?! Cause! Everything is his now. We like him better than you. NOOOOOO. KILL YOURSELF THEN. I tried. I was like “Look, Ali” He was like: “Over here” Oh. EXT. ST PAUL'S CEMETARY, DAY. Where you going? Idk. What is that sound. Idk. ELON ALIAS? Uhh__ I don't have an alias for you, son, I'm sorry. You're just ELON MUSK ELON! ELON! Oh, my—christs, what's happened to you? I don't know! My eyes! My eyes! Mmmmm. Rye bread sounds fucking awesome right now. Tight. *sniffs* Tight. Tight. WHOOPDEWOO. Yep. You know—WHOOPDEWOO. WHOOPDE— WHOOPI. What the FUCK. WHAT. I was. Well. That's good. What. I don't know what I'm looking at but I'm starting to like these eyes. What! Whose eyes are these?? Idk. But once I found out I was using Satan's— WAIT, like, the DEVIL?! Yes, Jason Sudakis. yes. You can come. Where are we going?! To get alcohol poisoning. There is a song Kissing the barrel of a gun Protect the land, they sing However, It is he that banishes The truth from nature The apocalypse has been upon us Since the collapse of these mighty towers The collapse of the mighty dollar I'ma still Riding MY BICI— BLAM! AHHHHH! You shot me! I'm sorry son! I thought you were black! I am— Kinda— Or was. *dies melodramatically* NOOOOOOOO! We shot one of our own! —Kinda… Fuck man, I'm gonna get so fired for this. Or like, at least laid off… Well, let's just hope it's a paid leave! [two racist cops— Ahem— Decide rather than going to jail, they will just shoot anybody who comes to the scene of the crime Damn, this gets levels Cause —to summarize, eventually the standoff ends, And when they get to heaven The kid they shit is God(s) “God The Judge” Welcome to my world The only law of the land, is There is no law Bound by the law, Is the land you've let behind All for the better The lost souls They know not to harm one another From the suffering, It's up they come From whence there on, We rise up Leave them in the dust From behind Let's to suffer under us Suffer under us You know what I want? A malotov cocktail For all of the tales I have yet to tell And I never will Cause you've lost my trust There's none of us left you know Where we left you The world we left to suffer under us Serivice, you servitor I see it in your eyes I am in another realm So high above you That you can't deny my diety You can deny my animal My wild side My life inside my life inside my DIE! —just die already Trust me, I'm trying. I'm just a horse I, Race—- —Course These nigga is racist These bitches is heated Cause she see I need him It's all DJs on walls Broken mirrors And broken bottle Alcoholics Mescaline And city sickness [Esha's addictions resurface, Patrick's use peaks at its all time high— ] She ravages the grocery store in search of comfort foods— Patrick is arrested after destroying an entire Liquor store I just had to Run a Madonna Why you thinking about my husband— at all!? I wish I knew, madam I wish I knew the answer I just had to Suffer through An album called Forgiveness I got get this I don't have nothin But suffering to do And I've already done that so, Shut up I couldn't have ever fathomed A cannon so handsom I have a bazooka Bubblegum It matches you cannon See, That's how far up I am— Fall back That be Of course not That's his father, Don't you know? I had to ask, Have you passed on, sir? And if you have— How is your son? That's my hat, though I only know them Once they become broken No promises though On the whole order of it See how far This is my home This is my temple You are my archer, Who holds now and arrows These are my horses These are my stables Run, rabbit, run For I am not stable Run, rabbit, run, rabbit Sit at my table All hail the archer King James, your majesty I called you Saint, Because, This is my masterpiece This is my hand, And this, is my label Come archer Come one and all Sit at my table I called you Saint Because I am unstable I painted this picture, Come sit at my table A land made of glass, And the casket, the cradle I made you up, because I became able to Ableton I only hate you Cause I can't have you I'd only date you If it weren't random Damn, this is tragic Taking my hand like that Showing me magic I'm not taking it back; You're a maniac, man And imm mad at you— Handsome professional Dads have it best I guess father know best And she's perfect The family is golden Her aura was always my horrible An honor it was To serve, you, sire The patriarch Of such a remarkable War with us The hers, and the girls Vursus, Woman lust over what are overuses are Sure enough Assuredly a certain Azure after all, is coming up I'm coming off this fast, man But to be grandfathered into The master craft By the madmen of Manhattan Is Damn. I was hungry. Well DUH. Just shut up and run, would you Shouldn't have uttered it Once is a curse, It's enough Just to be as unloved as I ever was But this one is fucking up my consciousness Of all the award I never won And everyone around Is the mother of his sons But, Where does that come from? The comfort was torn from her heart, Where she left it, On the alter, Still bleeding And his heart never beats for her Evil, she thinks If the keeper of the keys She had bathed/ Or had mated with— But she sees this: “Stamatina” And know there's some Jesus In this Genius And the trickery That just may be as fatal As Mother Nature In his genes, The super creeps and creperies Another demolished apostle For falling in love, She collects, of cours Albums as tokens In the exchanges, she lays all her eggs The jogs toning her legs for the right one, And all out of protein She gobbles the apples and ashes, Ambidextrous Dexters watching all this as the butcher of Some harbor Stuck in New York, New story, With the same old habits All this was a tragic And unhappy accident As cellibacy creeps up In the form of Some imaginative masturbation Fascinated with the fashion And architecture of summon city A portal gun, One dollar bill Some pills Some fuckin remedy for Whoever that shapeshifter Posing as Jimmy Fallon Actually is Cause none of this Can never And never did happen And. When your spirit is floating down that tunnel towards the light— You know what's behind the light? It's not God, it's— LORNE MICHAELS (ME) Uh oh. —and I don't know how you did this, but— {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū.

“El Machina Caballero” Wait, you're married to Catherine Heinowitz? I was. Like THE Heinowitz? As in Rebecca Heinowitz? —Katie Heinowitz! YES. Like the guys who made Church Factory! You're a Sasquatch. I know. All the TV people are smaller in person In one way or another— Live or behind the scenes Believe me The tv people need you Just as much as You need your TV Please believe me Everything is not what it seems to be As Seen on TV [The Tv People Theme Song] Yes. What is WRONG with you? Something. Marc Shultz? I fucking guess. You're Jewish? If I wasn't before, I am now! You can't be serious. All I see And all I am Is you and I Inside The Eye ___ This is mescaline. Okay. I take this when I get too—(he spins his finger) spun around, wound up. I get that. You want to go with me? No, but I'll watch over you, at least. That's all I ask. Patrick and Esha under the guidance and guise of the eye are best friends, have become bound by blood in such a sacred oath that one does not function without the other, and although moving without restraint or restriction independently, grow magnetically and enigmatically together by force of nature, as we learn to understand that the connection precedes the bond by which the sacred oath has bound them, and also is… Also is what! Goddamn! Idk, lost my train of thought. The irony of irony, is that Patrick tends to get away with his bizarre and off the wire behavior, because he is surrounded by people who love him for his talent and open heart— his downfall often being that the only person who doesn't love Patrick, is himself. 1-888-788-0099. You know what DNA stands for? Do not attempt to talk to me when I'm fasting. I'm not in my body, almost at all. Trying to get God to talk in English is like, A task, Do not attempt. I don't know what channel you're on. Ah, the dreads. The olden ones seem to have known I was coming. More coffee. No, no coffee. Breakfast is— No, I need you fasting for this. For what. Come on. That's not my God. You know what. I know that. Your God is money. Go back to California! I WISH, if I could have an apartment like this in California, I would have been gone, however There is a lot of love in New York. That's the reason it's still standing up. When is this? I don't know. Couldn't have gone too far back, you know— I was still at least 3 days in And three days out, And completely full of shit, Which must mean I'm WHERE'S JIMMY FALLON. I'm Jimmy Fallon. No, the REAL Jimmy Fallon. Go, quickly. Yes, sire! You know, I'll scratch your eyes out. That might take a long time; I have eyes all over this city. Uh, line? Come, ishii, and Quickly. How did I spell that again? One way, or another, All the series are going to collide with all the series, At some point! Listen, Emmitt… Yes. I'm going to need you to explain this experiment to me.,,very—simply. It is simple! You know this! I know this trick! Follow me. I need a safety. I'm oooh, shiny! Whatever. Come on. This is FUCKED UP THIS IS FUCKED UP THIS IS FUCKED UP FUCKED UP TRUMP CITY, USA Just fucking kill me. SETH. Rogen, or Myers? Both of you. What? Really? Yes. Okay. GO, So you know all this to be true, right? Yes. Correct, So if you know that, Then you know I'm not the real Jimmy Fallon… Exactly. I trusted you! Trusted me for WHAT. Not to LOOK. Look. No. Look at me. NO. Oh good, the piano bar. I told you she was gay. I'm not gay, I'm just. Please, just one drink with me. NO, Satan, Jesus. Okay, Jesus, relax. Quit saying your own name. I OWN YOU. You are my SLAVE. Okay. That's…. That's not okay! You killed my boss! Is this like a 3D thank you card, or something? He writes my checks! Did you check his pockets? Severance pay, maybe. How many days is this fasting? I don't know, maybe like 1, 2 Two days? I can do that. Three hundred and 80 MESSAGES. Hey, this is— BEEEEEEP. Messages erased! Hey! What the fuck! You can't have these things, Jimmy! That's just my stage name! Listen to me Was it Connie?! I hope it was Connie! JUST—SHUT UP. Come with me. Why r u following me?! GARY! GARY! SAVE ME! Okay, this is strange, but the subtle SpongeBob references in this series Now make everything crazy. If I kill myself today, you know, he wins at everything. Why would I kill myself on my wedding anniversary. Why would you kill yourself on my birthday. Cause, Plus One, Because, Johnny, I loved you— And I never told you that. Actions speak louder than words. Way, way louder. This is a class action lawsuit from 96 celebrities. What are you suing me for?! Nothing?! MY CORNBREAD RECIPE?! SERIOUSLY?! Who the fuck is driving this thing? It's not me, actually. You should ask the conductor— I'm just having an out of body experience. Okay, that cop did look like Dillon Francis. I thought Dillon Francis was Satan. I thought so too, but then— NICOLAS?! AHAHAHAH. Oh no! He's taken another hostage. Yep. Poor thing! NICKELODEON WOULD YOU DO THIS. Uhhhh—- maybe DOUBLE DARE. FUCK, MAN! Okay, whose driving?! Satan, take the wheel for a second. Okee. *instantly crashes* Instant death! Instant infinity— Dammit. I'm telling you, god is actually winning this thing. WHERE IS HE?! Jim, get out of New York City, Take your family, Take everything with you. Okay. I'm— Wait WHAT. What did you just say?! Nothing, I'll kill you, you know. GOOD. Hello? This is the Illuminati speaking. Okay. Meet me at. What is this, I don't know. The Heineken factory?! I'll give you $36 dollars, every time you say. Why are you doing this? I don't know: That's right! You don't know! Are the eyes in yet? Not yet. Are the headmasters here? Almost. Great. This is going to be a great project— I CANT DYSFUNCTION. Don't you mean. You can't “function “ Well— Yes, and no— It's just MY EYEs! MY EYES DONT WORK. But it's amazing, it's almost as if— You know what. I like these traits. I'm keeping them. NO, LET ME GO. No, little man. Stay in the box, like you're supposed to— Oh and— NO, DONT SHUT ME— imm not shutting you off. I'm just turning the volume—doooown.. No, wait— (But quiet) Ya. I also wish I was white. YUCK. What am I doing like this? Idk. Kill yourself. Right? I wish. BLACK IS BEAUUUUUTIFUL. Yeah. It is. But— Look, don't— Avoid these creatures. Hey baby! wtf is he saying. Idk. I think he speaks English. Switch to English. Uhhh, who am I again. The band made her smile, But the dancer made her laugh. She liked the band; But the dancer made her laugh The band made her happy, But the dancer made her laugh I don't follow a man, unless— The music, yes. Follow that. He's got my heart in his hand And she's got the world in her eyes And he's got his hands on my heart The sermon of sorts, The rock and the kite THE FOURTH REIGHT HAS RISEN! THE SOUTH WILL RIIIIIIIIIIIIZE OH SHIT, I almost forgot this guy WILL FERAL. lol. That actually happened. You shouldn't fast like this City sickness, city sickness Perhaps you should move to Ohio, dear matron, if all you can say is Words with hatred When I loved you in the first place. Hey, Satan. But I just couldn't take it The white devil had his day in my Spiritual Parisian The nuptial edits. The wedding band, Remote controls and Architects Sages and pages of Architects Art directors, Casting agents And I just can't handle it I just need managers Booking, Writing books And keeping close tabs On their dialects Who dialed you in God 9/11 Who dialed you in on 420 The devil himself And my mom must have warned them She warned them with Fireball A cannon Never had a Catastrophe You summoned her, didn't you?! WHO? Which— My MOM! No, MAYA, actually no! You did! You I did not Look, SEYONCE wants you to dance with her. Dance? I can't. That is tragic. He's a GOD, I tell you that! Did I tell you that?! Now, fist bump the trash can. Nah. Dammit. Fuck, man. Yes, I win! That one scene where Patrick sells all of esha's guitsrs— You sold all my stuff?! What is that, anyway?l Liked”, a shrine!!?! What?! Fuck you! —fuck you. I'm a collector! Well, guess what?! Now you're a contributor— What?! You want your precious, fuckin— It's a collection Yeah, well your collection is sitting in an exhibit at your favorite musical in Manhattan How would you know what's my favorite— —let's just say I guessed — Fantastic. you— I donated them. You what— You don't have to thank me, either— One day, that museum will be honored and redededicsted entirely in your namesake I fucking hate you, How would you even know these things. Somethings you've yet to see, But I've seen them, and believe me The Eye is Aching for it For what? The tears in his eyes have turned into l glowing halos, and the whole world becomes something other than what it was, the office, fading into what seems to be a single soundstagec and as the halos in his eyes begin to transform into other worlds, the present becomes the past, as he has been altered—to becom The One; the original Predecessor of The Eye. I don't— What show is this? I don't know. [The Festival Project] …did you dream last night, Esha? …what do you mean? Did you dream? I did dream of him, Last night Two dreams I dreamed A weeklong song, I sung An aching heart I woke with I KNEW THERE WAS HONEY IN THIS. —just—hold onto this for a minute, would you? Sure, I— Aaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaa So that's where I left it. Hm. THE VEGAN VERSION USES AGAVE AND ROASTED— shhhhhh. This is my recipe now. My secret recipe. Don't spoil it. Sh! OH, ROASTED— ssh! I'm shook. Oh look. There he is again. Fuck!, dude how did you do this?! I don't know! Run! SHOOT HIM. what. Just— Shoot him. I got the gangstas With the pizzas YEET. No, try something else. What, you don't like this one? No, it's not- I YEETS THE PIZZA I EATS THE PIZZA Oh, apparently they were Lizzing at this shit yesterday. For WHAT purpose. That's not funny. Remember: Comedy is always tragic— What. What's this. Oh, that is funny, When it isn't you. It's true. It did seem my baby at one point had a death wish. Oh, look, Yay. Go baby! You're doin it! Woo! Now watch this: [baby attempts to run into oncoming traffic ] Mommy NOOOO! Haha. I remember those days. My baby fever is out of control. LOOK AT HIM W0000000W LOOK AT THESE JEANS YUM. LOOK AT THESE hair, he has nice hair. Try not to scare her: AH. Fuck. Yikes. Okay, I can't see again, which means. I'M BLIND! She took— MY EYEBALLS. Here, use mine. Thanks, uhh— Satan. Oh, thanks Sa— Wait. But my friends and fans call me SKRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLL THATS THE X! What?! THATS YOUR X?! NO. WELL, yes, but THATS “THE X” Aw, man. What the fuck, God. I swear, an extra small And I'm still too fat Let's go to McDonald's I LOVE MCDONALDS OH. Hey. Oh, I remember this it's EXIT NO EXIT NOW, before my *before my life gets hacked. lol fuck these fags. Seriously, it's like Well, I'm on my own time NY YOURE ON MY TIME YOURE ON CITY TIME YEh, exactly. This is NO, THIS IS MY TIME always let the white girls go ahead of you; They're trying to be angrily mean and flamboyant, but trust this; She's going to tell you how rough the waters are by taking the journey before you And though she will not show it Maybe ever She loves you As her sister As a woman Okay, you little black bitch Am I little now, the other day I was FAT 8mm I'm gonna kill you. Great, my life is ruined. Ok. I just want like Cereal Some English muffins Like, Oatmeal, Quinoa, I don't care Whatever This ruins you, you know. That's ok. I'd rather be killed by every white girl in the Illuminati, than by my ex husband again. Seriously, is this not torture to you? It is, it's just This is MY magic. That's the—that's the white devil, it's pretty much, I told you this lol I love New York This white girl— I actually liked her She was a bag lady, Uptown, You could tell she was just-/ Stuck in this fucked up world too long, Cause I smiled at her, Cause I liked her Crackheadedness, I guess But you could tell she wasn't on crack Cause she didn't have the crack swagger You know, the— *crack swaggers* That shit. And she was just like Cracked. Probably cause she lived uptown. I personally prefer anything below. 80th She was somewhere like, Above 96th, And I was just like— Lost, with no phone, on God Mode like Well, my eyes don't work and I no longer speak proper English, I'm some kind of bird, I guess And I'm lost as fuck Taking the extra long way home because, I was literally trying to go One fucking place On what is literally the worst day in history: 4/20 Not only because it was Hitler birthday, Or because everyone is now smoking like government funded weed, Which could never be a good thing— But because the only train, Or one of the only train lines That goes directly from this one place to my house Was just— magically “Out” that day Cause, you know— New York City. And this lady gets on the train, Just fucking rambling, And I laughed— Actually out loud, Because, I left my house at like 10 in the morning And I didn't get back until almost midnight, Just trying to get to this one place and like— Couldn't. Or, actually by the time I did I was just— So fucking hungry That everything around me Was some kind of Something I made up Or was working on writing— This also happens when I'm fasting Everything just turns in to [the festival project] Which I thought Nobody else in the world even knew or cared about except for God And the aliens that have been writing it— Which is usually Come on. Where are we going? “Staples” EXT. ONE WORLD TRADE CENTER. DAY AWTF NO. They put his NAME on a BUS. Why would they do THAT?! If you're a whole bus, Then I must be the motor… Satan is my motor His name on a building— Oh hell no. This is the wrong place and time Something is wrong! NO. FUCK THAT GUY FUCK THIS DAY. Just — Dissociate! Dissociate! Uhhh—- I gotta go back in time and stop myself from getting married. Why?! Cause! Everything is his now. We like him better than you. NOOOOOO. KILL YOURSELF THEN. I tried. I was like “Look, Ali” He was like: “Over here” Oh. EXT. ST PAUL'S CEMETARY, DAY. Where you going? Idk. What is that sound. Idk. ELON ALIAS? Uhh__ I don't have an alias for you, son, I'm sorry. You're just ELON MUSK ELON! ELON! Oh, my—christs, what's happened to you? I don't know! My eyes! My eyes! Mmmmm. Rye bread sounds fucking awesome right now. Tight. *sniffs* Tight. Tight. WHOOPDEWOO. Yep. You know—WHOOPDEWOO. WHOOPDE— WHOOPI. What the FUCK. WHAT. I was. Well. That's good. What. I don't know what I'm looking at but I'm starting to like these eyes. What! Whose eyes are these?? Idk. But once I found out I was using Satan's— WAIT, like, the DEVIL?! Yes, Jason Sudakis. yes. You can come. Where are we going?! To get alcohol poisoning. There is a song Kissing the barrel of a gun Protect the land, they sing However, It is he that banishes The truth from nature The apocalypse has been upon us Since the collapse of these mighty towers The collapse of the mighty dollar I'ma still Riding MY BICI— BLAM! AHHHHH! You shot me! I'm sorry son! I thought you were black! I am— Kinda— Or was. *dies melodramatically* NOOOOOOOO! We shot one of our own! —Kinda… Fuck man, I'm gonna get so fired for this. Or like, at least laid off… Well, let's just hope it's a paid leave! [two racist cops— Ahem— Decide rather than going to jail, they will just shoot anybody who comes to the scene of the crime Damn, this gets levels Cause —to summarize, eventually the standoff ends, And when they get to heaven The kid they shit is God(s) “God The Judge” Welcome to my world The only law of the land, is There is no law Bound by the law, Is the land you've let behind All for the better The lost souls They know not to harm one another From the suffering, It's up they come From whence there on, We rise up Leave them in the dust From behind Let's to suffer under us Suffer under us You know what I want? A malotov cocktail For all of the tales I have yet to tell And I never will Cause you've lost my trust There's none of us left you know Where we left you The world we left to suffer under us Serivice, you servitor I see it in your eyes I am in another realm So high above you That you can't deny my diety You can deny my animal My wild side My life inside my life inside my DIE! —just die already Trust me, I'm trying. I'm just a horse I, Race—- —Course These nigga is racist These bitches is heated Cause she see I need him It's all DJs on walls Broken mirrors And broken bottle Alcoholics Mescaline And city sickness [Esha's addictions resurface, Patrick's use peaks at its all time high— ] She ravages the grocery store in search of comfort foods— Patrick is arrested after destroying an entire Liquor store I just had to Run a Madonna Why you thinking about my husband— at all!? I wish I knew, madam I wish I knew the answer I just had to Suffer through An album called Forgiveness I got get this I don't have nothin But suffering to do And I've already done that so, Shut up I couldn't have ever fathomed A cannon so handsom I have a bazooka Bubblegum It matches you cannon See, That's how far up I am— Fall back That be Of course not That's his father, Don't you know? I had to ask, Have you passed on, sir? And if you have— How is your son? That's my hat, though I only know them Once they become broken No promises though On the whole order of it See how far This is my home This is my temple You are my archer, Who holds now and arrows These are my horses These are my stables Run, rabbit, run For I am not stable Run, rabbit, run, rabbit Sit at my table All hail the archer King James, your majesty I called you Saint, Because, This is my masterpiece This is my hand, And this, is my label Come archer Come one and all Sit at my table I called you Saint Because I am unstable I painted this picture, Come sit at my table A land made of glass, And the casket, the cradle I made you up, because I became able to Ableton I only hate you Cause I can't have you I'd only date you If it weren't random Damn, this is tragic Taking my hand like that Showing me magic I'm not taking it back; You're a maniac, man And imm mad at you— Handsome professional Dads have it best I guess father know best And she's perfect The family is golden Her aura was always my horrible An honor it was To serve, you, sire The patriarch Of such a remarkable War with us The hers, and the girls Vursus, Woman lust over what are overuses are Sure enough Assuredly a certain Azure after all, is coming up I'm coming off this fast, man But to be grandfathered into The master craft By the madmen of Manhattan Is Damn. I was hungry. Well DUH. Just shut up and run, would you Shouldn't have uttered it Once is a curse, It's enough Just to be as unloved as I ever was But this one is fucking up my consciousness Of all the award I never won And everyone around Is the mother of his sons But, Where does that come from? The comfort was torn from her heart, Where she left it, On the alter, Still bleeding And his heart never beats for her Evil, she thinks If the keeper of the keys She had bathed/ Or had mated with— But she sees this: “Stamatina” And know there's some Jesus In this Genius And the trickery That just may be as fatal As Mother Nature In his genes, The super creeps and creperies Another demolished apostle For falling in love, She collects, of cours Albums as tokens In the exchanges, she lays all her eggs The jogs toning her legs for the right one, And all out of protein She gobbles the apples and ashes, Ambidextrous Dexters watching all this as the butcher of Some harbor Stuck in New York, New story, With the same old habits All this was a tragic And unhappy accident As cellibacy creeps up In the form of Some imaginative masturbation Fascinated with the fashion And architecture of summon city A portal gun, One dollar bill Some pills Some fuckin remedy for Whoever that shapeshifter Posing as Jimmy Fallon Actually is Cause none of this Can never And never did happen And. When your spirit is floating down that tunnel towards the light— You know what's behind the light? It's not God, it's— LORNE MICHAELS (ME) Uh oh. —and I don't know how you did this, but— {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū.

“El Machina Caballero” Wait, you're married to Catherine Heinowitz? I was. Like THE Heinowitz? As in Rebecca Heinowitz? —Katie Heinowitz! YES. Like the guys who made Church Factory! You're a Sasquatch. I know. All the TV people are smaller in person In one way or another— Live or behind the scenes Believe me The tv people need you Just as much as You need your TV Please believe me Everything is not what it seems to be As Seen on TV [The Tv People Theme Song] Yes. What is WRONG with you? Something. Marc Shultz? I fucking guess. You're Jewish? If I wasn't before, I am now! You can't be serious. All I see And all I am Is you and I Inside The Eye ___ This is mescaline. Okay. I take this when I get too—(he spins his finger) spun around, wound up. I get that. You want to go with me? No, but I'll watch over you, at least. That's all I ask. Patrick and Esha under the guidance and guise of the eye are best friends, have become bound by blood in such a sacred oath that one does not function without the other, and although moving without restraint or restriction independently, grow magnetically and enigmatically together by force of nature, as we learn to understand that the connection precedes the bond by which the sacred oath has bound them, and also is… Also is what! Goddamn! Idk, lost my train of thought. The irony of irony, is that Patrick tends to get away with his bizarre and off the wire behavior, because he is surrounded by people who love him for his talent and open heart— his downfall often being that the only person who doesn't love Patrick, is himself. 1-888-788-0099. You know what DNA stands for? Do not attempt to talk to me when I'm fasting. I'm not in my body, almost at all. Trying to get God to talk in English is like, A task, Do not attempt. I don't know what channel you're on. Ah, the dreads. The olden ones seem to have known I was coming. More coffee. No, no coffee. Breakfast is— No, I need you fasting for this. For what. Come on. That's not my God. You know what. I know that. Your God is money. Go back to California! I WISH, if I could have an apartment like this in California, I would have been gone, however There is a lot of love in New York. That's the reason it's still standing up. When is this? I don't know. Couldn't have gone too far back, you know— I was still at least 3 days in And three days out, And completely full of shit, Which must mean I'm WHERE'S JIMMY FALLON. I'm Jimmy Fallon. No, the REAL Jimmy Fallon. Go, quickly. Yes, sire! You know, I'll scratch your eyes out. That might take a long time; I have eyes all over this city. Uh, line? Come, ishii, and Quickly. How did I spell that again? One way, or another, All the series are going to collide with all the series, At some point! Listen, Emmitt… Yes. I'm going to need you to explain this experiment to me.,,very—simply. It is simple! You know this! I know this trick! Follow me. I need a safety. I'm oooh, shiny! Whatever. Come on. This is FUCKED UP THIS IS FUCKED UP THIS IS FUCKED UP FUCKED UP TRUMP CITY, USA Just fucking kill me. SETH. Rogen, or Myers? Both of you. What? Really? Yes. Okay. GO, So you know all this to be true, right? Yes. Correct, So if you know that, Then you know I'm not the real Jimmy Fallon… Exactly. I trusted you! Trusted me for WHAT. Not to LOOK. Look. No. Look at me. NO. Oh good, the piano bar. I told you she was gay. I'm not gay, I'm just. Please, just one drink with me. NO, Satan, Jesus. Okay, Jesus, relax. Quit saying your own name. I OWN YOU. You are my SLAVE. Okay. That's…. That's not okay! You killed my boss! Is this like a 3D thank you card, or something? He writes my checks! Did you check his pockets? Severance pay, maybe. How many days is this fasting? I don't know, maybe like 1, 2 Two days? I can do that. Three hundred and 80 MESSAGES. Hey, this is— BEEEEEEP. Messages erased! Hey! What the fuck! You can't have these things, Jimmy! That's just my stage name! Listen to me Was it Connie?! I hope it was Connie! JUST—SHUT UP. Come with me. Why r u following me?! GARY! GARY! SAVE ME! Okay, this is strange, but the subtle SpongeBob references in this series Now make everything crazy. If I kill myself today, you know, he wins at everything. Why would I kill myself on my wedding anniversary. Why would you kill yourself on my birthday. Cause, Plus One, Because, Johnny, I loved you— And I never told you that. Actions speak louder than words. Way, way louder. This is a class action lawsuit from 96 celebrities. What are you suing me for?! Nothing?! MY CORNBREAD RECIPE?! SERIOUSLY?! Who the fuck is driving this thing? It's not me, actually. You should ask the conductor— I'm just having an out of body experience. Okay, that cop did look like Dillon Francis. I thought Dillon Francis was Satan. I thought so too, but then— NICOLAS?! AHAHAHAH. Oh no! He's taken another hostage. Yep. Poor thing! NICKELODEON WOULD YOU DO THIS. Uhhhh—- maybe DOUBLE DARE. FUCK, MAN! Okay, whose driving?! Satan, take the wheel for a second. Okee. *instantly crashes* Instant death! Instant infinity— Dammit. I'm telling you, god is actually winning this thing. WHERE IS HE?! Jim, get out of New York City, Take your family, Take everything with you. Okay. I'm— Wait WHAT. What did you just say?! Nothing, I'll kill you, you know. GOOD. Hello? This is the Illuminati speaking. Okay. Meet me at. What is this, I don't know. The Heineken factory?! I'll give you $36 dollars, every time you say. Why are you doing this? I don't know: That's right! You don't know! Are the eyes in yet? Not yet. Are the headmasters here? Almost. Great. This is going to be a great project— I CANT DYSFUNCTION. Don't you mean. You can't “function “ Well— Yes, and no— It's just MY EYEs! MY EYES DONT WORK. But it's amazing, it's almost as if— You know what. I like these traits. I'm keeping them. NO, LET ME GO. No, little man. Stay in the box, like you're supposed to— Oh and— NO, DONT SHUT ME— imm not shutting you off. I'm just turning the volume—doooown.. No, wait— (But quiet) Ya. I also wish I was white. YUCK. What am I doing like this? Idk. Kill yourself. Right? I wish. BLACK IS BEAUUUUUTIFUL. Yeah. It is. But— Look, don't— Avoid these creatures. Hey baby! wtf is he saying. Idk. I think he speaks English. Switch to English. Uhhh, who am I again. The band made her smile, But the dancer made her laugh. She liked the band; But the dancer made her laugh The band made her happy, But the dancer made her laugh I don't follow a man, unless— The music, yes. Follow that. He's got my heart in his hand And she's got the world in her eyes And he's got his hands on my heart The sermon of sorts, The rock and the kite THE FOURTH REIGHT HAS RISEN! THE SOUTH WILL RIIIIIIIIIIIIZE OH SHIT, I almost forgot this guy WILL FERAL. lol. That actually happened. You shouldn't fast like this City sickness, city sickness Perhaps you should move to Ohio, dear matron, if all you can say is Words with hatred When I loved you in the first place. Hey, Satan. But I just couldn't take it The white devil had his day in my Spiritual Parisian The nuptial edits. The wedding band, Remote controls and Architects Sages and pages of Architects Art directors, Casting agents And I just can't handle it I just need managers Booking, Writing books And keeping close tabs On their dialects Who dialed you in God 9/11 Who dialed you in on 420 The devil himself And my mom must have warned them She warned them with Fireball A cannon Never had a Catastrophe You summoned her, didn't you?! WHO? Which— My MOM! No, MAYA, actually no! You did! You I did not Look, SEYONCE wants you to dance with her. Dance? I can't. That is tragic. He's a GOD, I tell you that! Did I tell you that?! Now, fist bump the trash can. Nah. Dammit. Fuck, man. Yes, I win! That one scene where Patrick sells all of esha's guitsrs— You sold all my stuff?! What is that, anyway?l Liked”, a shrine!!?! What?! Fuck you! —fuck you. I'm a collector! Well, guess what?! Now you're a contributor— What?! You want your precious, fuckin— It's a collection Yeah, well your collection is sitting in an exhibit at your favorite musical in Manhattan How would you know what's my favorite— —let's just say I guessed — Fantastic. you— I donated them. You what— You don't have to thank me, either— One day, that museum will be honored and redededicsted entirely in your namesake I fucking hate you, How would you even know these things. Somethings you've yet to see, But I've seen them, and believe me The Eye is Aching for it For what? The tears in his eyes have turned into l glowing halos, and the whole world becomes something other than what it was, the office, fading into what seems to be a single soundstagec and as the halos in his eyes begin to transform into other worlds, the present becomes the past, as he has been altered—to becom The One; the original Predecessor of The Eye. I don't— What show is this? I don't know. [The Festival Project] …did you dream last night, Esha? …what do you mean? Did you dream? I did dream of him, Last night Two dreams I dreamed A weeklong song, I sung An aching heart I woke with I KNEW THERE WAS HONEY IN THIS. —just—hold onto this for a minute, would you? Sure, I— Aaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaa So that's where I left it. Hm. THE VEGAN VERSION USES AGAVE AND ROASTED— shhhhhh. This is my recipe now. My secret recipe. Don't spoil it. Sh! OH, ROASTED— ssh! I'm shook. Oh look. There he is again. Fuck!, dude how did you do this?! I don't know! Run! SHOOT HIM. what. Just— Shoot him. I got the gangstas With the pizzas YEET. No, try something else. What, you don't like this one? No, it's not- I YEETS THE PIZZA I EATS THE PIZZA Oh, apparently they were Lizzing at this shit yesterday. For WHAT purpose. That's not funny. Remember: Comedy is always tragic— What. What's this. Oh, that is funny, When it isn't you. It's true. It did seem my baby at one point had a death wish. Oh, look, Yay. Go baby! You're doin it! Woo! Now watch this: [baby attempts to run into oncoming traffic ] Mommy NOOOO! Haha. I remember those days. My baby fever is out of control. LOOK AT HIM W0000000W LOOK AT THESE JEANS YUM. LOOK AT THESE hair, he has nice hair. Try not to scare her: AH. Fuck. Yikes. Okay, I can't see again, which means. I'M BLIND! She took— MY EYEBALLS. Here, use mine. Thanks, uhh— Satan. Oh, thanks Sa— Wait. But my friends and fans call me SKRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLL THATS THE X! What?! THATS YOUR X?! NO. WELL, yes, but THATS “THE X” Aw, man. What the fuck, God. I swear, an extra small And I'm still too fat Let's go to McDonald's I LOVE MCDONALDS OH. Hey. Oh, I remember this it's EXIT NO EXIT NOW, before my *before my life gets hacked. lol fuck these fags. Seriously, it's like Well, I'm on my own time NY YOURE ON MY TIME YOURE ON CITY TIME YEh, exactly. This is NO, THIS IS MY TIME always let the white girls go ahead of you; They're trying to be angrily mean and flamboyant, but trust this; She's going to tell you how rough the waters are by taking the journey before you And though she will not show it Maybe ever She loves you As her sister As a woman Okay, you little black bitch Am I little now, the other day I was FAT 8mm I'm gonna kill you. Great, my life is ruined. Ok. I just want like Cereal Some English muffins Like, Oatmeal, Quinoa, I don't care Whatever This ruins you, you know. That's ok. I'd rather be killed by every white girl in the Illuminati, than by my ex husband again. Seriously, is this not torture to you? It is, it's just This is MY magic. That's the—that's the white devil, it's pretty much, I told you this lol I love New York This white girl— I actually liked her She was a bag lady, Uptown, You could tell she was just-/ Stuck in this fucked up world too long, Cause I smiled at her, Cause I liked her Crackheadedness, I guess But you could tell she wasn't on crack Cause she didn't have the crack swagger You know, the— *crack swaggers* That shit. And she was just like Cracked. Probably cause she lived uptown. I personally prefer anything below. 80th She was somewhere like, Above 96th, And I was just like— Lost, with no phone, on God Mode like Well, my eyes don't work and I no longer speak proper English, I'm some kind of bird, I guess And I'm lost as fuck Taking the extra long way home because, I was literally trying to go One fucking place On what is literally the worst day in history: 4/20 Not only because it was Hitler birthday, Or because everyone is now smoking like government funded weed, Which could never be a good thing— But because the only train, Or one of the only train lines That goes directly from this one place to my house Was just— magically “Out” that day Cause, you know— New York City. And this lady gets on the train, Just fucking rambling, And I laughed— Actually out loud, Because, I left my house at like 10 in the morning And I didn't get back until almost midnight, Just trying to get to this one place and like— Couldn't. Or, actually by the time I did I was just— So fucking hungry That everything around me Was some kind of Something I made up Or was working on writing— This also happens when I'm fasting Everything just turns in to [the festival project] Which I thought Nobody else in the world even knew or cared about except for God And the aliens that have been writing it— Which is usually Come on. Where are we going? “Staples” EXT. ONE WORLD TRADE CENTER. DAY AWTF NO. They put his NAME on a BUS. Why would they do THAT?! If you're a whole bus, Then I must be the motor… Satan is my motor His name on a building— Oh hell no. This is the wrong place and time Something is wrong! NO. FUCK THAT GUY FUCK THIS DAY. Just — Dissociate! Dissociate! Uhhh—- I gotta go back in time and stop myself from getting married. Why?! Cause! Everything is his now. We like him better than you. NOOOOOO. KILL YOURSELF THEN. I tried. I was like “Look, Ali” He was like: “Over here” Oh. EXT. ST PAUL'S CEMETARY, DAY. Where you going? Idk. What is that sound. Idk. ELON ALIAS? Uhh__ I don't have an alias for you, son, I'm sorry. You're just ELON MUSK ELON! ELON! Oh, my—christs, what's happened to you? I don't know! My eyes! My eyes! Mmmmm. Rye bread sounds fucking awesome right now. Tight. *sniffs* Tight. Tight. WHOOPDEWOO. Yep. You know—WHOOPDEWOO. WHOOPDE— WHOOPI. What the FUCK. WHAT. I was. Well. That's good. What. I don't know what I'm looking at but I'm starting to like these eyes. What! Whose eyes are these?? Idk. But once I found out I was using Satan's— WAIT, like, the DEVIL?! Yes, Jason Sudakis. yes. You can come. Where are we going?! To get alcohol poisoning. There is a song Kissing the barrel of a gun Protect the land, they sing However, It is he that banishes The truth from nature The apocalypse has been upon us Since the collapse of these mighty towers The collapse of the mighty dollar I'ma still Riding MY BICI— BLAM! AHHHHH! You shot me! I'm sorry son! I thought you were black! I am— Kinda— Or was. *dies melodramatically* NOOOOOOOO! We shot one of our own! —Kinda… Fuck man, I'm gonna get so fired for this. Or like, at least laid off… Well, let's just hope it's a paid leave! [two racist cops— Ahem— Decide rather than going to jail, they will just shoot anybody who comes to the scene of the crime Damn, this gets levels Cause —to summarize, eventually the standoff ends, And when they get to heaven The kid they shit is God(s) “God The Judge” Welcome to my world The only law of the land, is There is no law Bound by the law, Is the land you've let behind All for the better The lost souls They know not to harm one another From the suffering, It's up they come From whence there on, We rise up Leave them in the dust From behind Let's to suffer under us Suffer under us You know what I want? A malotov cocktail For all of the tales I have yet to tell And I never will Cause you've lost my trust There's none of us left you know Where we left you The world we left to suffer under us Serivice, you servitor I see it in your eyes I am in another realm So high above you That you can't deny my diety You can deny my animal My wild side My life inside my life inside my DIE! —just die already Trust me, I'm trying. I'm just a horse I, Race—- —Course These nigga is racist These bitches is heated Cause she see I need him It's all DJs on walls Broken mirrors And broken bottle Alcoholics Mescaline And city sickness [Esha's addictions resurface, Patrick's use peaks at its all time high— ] She ravages the grocery store in search of comfort foods— Patrick is arrested after destroying an entire Liquor store I just had to Run a Madonna Why you thinking about my husband— at all!? I wish I knew, madam I wish I knew the answer I just had to Suffer through An album called Forgiveness I got get this I don't have nothin But suffering to do And I've already done that so, Shut up I couldn't have ever fathomed A cannon so handsom I have a bazooka Bubblegum It matches you cannon See, That's how far up I am— Fall back That be Of course not That's his father, Don't you know? I had to ask, Have you passed on, sir? And if you have— How is your son? That's my hat, though I only know them Once they become broken No promises though On the whole order of it See how far This is my home This is my temple You are my archer, Who holds now and arrows These are my horses These are my stables Run, rabbit, run For I am not stable Run, rabbit, run, rabbit Sit at my table All hail the archer King James, your majesty I called you Saint, Because, This is my masterpiece This is my hand, And this, is my label Come archer Come one and all Sit at my table I called you Saint Because I am unstable I painted this picture, Come sit at my table A land made of glass, And the casket, the cradle I made you up, because I became able to Ableton I only hate you Cause I can't have you I'd only date you If it weren't random Damn, this is tragic Taking my hand like that Showing me magic I'm not taking it back; You're a maniac, man And imm mad at you— Handsome professional Dads have it best I guess father know best And she's perfect The family is golden Her aura was always my horrible An honor it was To serve, you, sire The patriarch Of such a remarkable War with us The hers, and the girls Vursus, Woman lust over what are overuses are Sure enough Assuredly a certain Azure after all, is coming up I'm coming off this fast, man But to be grandfathered into The master craft By the madmen of Manhattan Is Damn. I was hungry. Well DUH. Just shut up and run, would you Shouldn't have uttered it Once is a curse, It's enough Just to be as unloved as I ever was But this one is fucking up my consciousness Of all the award I never won And everyone around Is the mother of his sons But, Where does that come from? The comfort was torn from her heart, Where she left it, On the alter, Still bleeding And his heart never beats for her Evil, she thinks If the keeper of the keys She had bathed/ Or had mated with— But she sees this: “Stamatina” And know there's some Jesus In this Genius And the trickery That just may be as fatal As Mother Nature In his genes, The super creeps and creperies Another demolished apostle For falling in love, She collects, of cours Albums as tokens In the exchanges, she lays all her eggs The jogs toning her legs for the right one, And all out of protein She gobbles the apples and ashes, Ambidextrous Dexters watching all this as the butcher of Some harbor Stuck in New York, New story, With the same old habits All this was a tragic And unhappy accident As cellibacy creeps up In the form of Some imaginative masturbation Fascinated with the fashion And architecture of summon city A portal gun, One dollar bill Some pills Some fuckin remedy for Whoever that shapeshifter Posing as Jimmy Fallon Actually is Cause none of this Can never And never did happen And. When your spirit is floating down that tunnel towards the light— You know what's behind the light? It's not God, it's— LORNE MICHAELS (ME) Uh oh. —and I don't know how you did this, but— {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū.

El Machina Caballero” Wait, you're married to Catherine Heinowitz? I was Like THE Heinowitz? As in Rebecca Heinowitz? —Katie Heinowitz! YES. Like the guys who made Church Factory! You're a Sasquatch. I know. All the TV people are smaller in person In one way or another— Live or behind the scenes Believe me The tv people need you Just as much as You need your TV Please believe me Everything is not what it seems to be As Seen on TV [The Tv People Theme Song] Yes. What is WRONG with you? Something. Marc Shultz? I fucking guess. You're Jewish? If I wasn't before, I am now! You can't be seeious. All I see And all I am Is you and I Inside The Eye ___ This is mescaline. Okay. I take this when I get too—(he spins his finger) spun around, wound up. I get that. You want to go with me? No, but I'll watch over you, at least. That's all I ask. Patrick and Esha under the guidance and guise of the eye are best friends, have become bound by blood in such a sacred oath that one does not function without the other, and although moving without restraint or restriction independently, grow magnetically and enigmatically together by force of nature, as we learn to understand that the connection precedes the bond by which the sacred oath has bound them, and also is Also is what! Goddamn! Idk, lost my train of thought. The irony of irony, is that Patrick tends to get away with his bizarre and off the wire behavior, because he is surrounded by people who love him for his talent and open heart— his downfall often being that the only person who doesn't love Patrick, is himself. 1-888-788-0099. You know what DNA stands for? Do not attempt to talk to me when I'm fasting. I'm not in my body, almost at all. Trying to get God to talk in English is like, A task, Do not attempt. I don't know what channel you're on. Ah, the dreads. The olden ones seem to have known I was coming. More coffee. No, no coffee. Breakfast is— No, I need you fasting for this. For what. Come on. That's not my God. You know what. I know that. Your God is money. Go back to California! I WISH, if I could have an apartment like this in California, I would have been gone, however There is a lot of love in New York. That's the reason it's still standing up. When is this? I don't know. Couldn't have gone too far back, you know— I was still at least 3 days in And three days out, And completely full of shit, Which must mean I'm WHERE'S JIMMY FALLON. I'm Jimmy Fallon. No, the REAL Jimmy Fallon. Go, quickly. Yes, sire! You know, I'll scratch your eyes out. That might take a long time; I have eyes all over this city. Uh, line? Come, ishii, and Quickly. How did I spell that again? One way, or another, All the series are going to collide with all the series, At some point! Listen, Emmitt… Yes. I'm going to need you to explain this experiment to me.,,very—simply. It is simple! You know this! I know this trick! Follow me. I need a safety. I'm oooh, shiny! Whatever. Come on. This is FUCKED UP THIS IS FUCKED UP THIS IS FUCKED UP FUCKED UP TRUMP CITY, USA Just fucking kill me. SETH. Rogen, or Myers? Both of you. What? Really? Yes. Okay. GO, So you know all this to be true, right? Yes. Correct, So if you know that, Then you know I'm not the real Jimmy Fallon… Exactly. I trusted you! Trusted me for WHAT. Not to LOOK. Look. No. Look at me. NO. Oh good, the piano bar. I told you she was gay. I'm not gay, I'm just. Please, just one drink with me. NO, Satan, Jesus. Okay, Jesus, relax. Quit saying your own name. I OWN YOU. You are my SLAVE. Okay. That's…. That's not okay! You killed my boss! Is this like a 3D thank you card, or something? He writes my checks! Did you check his pockets? Severance pay, maybe. How many days is this fasting? I don't know, maybe like 1, 2 Two days? I can do that. Three hundred and 80 MESSAGES. Hey, this is— BEEEEEEP. Messages erased! Hey! What the fuck! You can't have these things, Jimmy! That's just my stage name! Listen to me Was it Connie?! I hope it was Connie! JUST—SHUT UP. Come with me. Why r u following me?! GARY! GARY! SAVE ME! Okay, this is strange, but the subtle SpongeBob references in this series Now make everything crazy. If I kill myself today, you know, he wins at everything. Why would I kill myself on my wedding anniversary. Why would you kill yourself on my birthday. Cause, Plus One, Because, Johnny, I loved you— And I never told you that. Actions speak louder than words. Way, way louder. This is a class action lawsuit from 96 celebrities. What are you suing me for?! Nothing?! MY CORNBREAD RECIPE?! SERIOUSLY?! Who the fuck is driving this thing? It's not me, actually. You should ask the conductor— I'm just having an out of body experience. Okay, that cop did look like Dillon Francis. I thought Dillon Francis was Satan. I thought so too, but then— NICOLAS?! AHAHAHAH. Oh no! He's taken another hostage. Yep. Poor thing! NICKELODEON WOULD YOU DO THIS. Uhhhh—- maybe DOUBLE DARE. FUCK, MAN! Okay, whose driving?! Satan, take the wheel for a second. Okee. *instantly crashes* Instant death! Instant infinity— Dammit. I'm telling you, god is actually winning this thing. WHERE IS HE?! Jim, get out of New York City, Take your family, Take everything with you. Okay. I'm— Wait WHAT. What did you just say?! Nothing, I'll kill you, you know. GOOD. Hello? This is the Illuminati speaking. Okay. Meet me at. What is this, I don't know. The Heineken factory?! I'll give you $36 dollars, every time you say. Why are you doing this? I don't know: That's right! You don't know! Are the eyes in yet? Not yet. Are the headmasters here? Almost. Great. This is going to be a great project— I CANT DYSFUNCTION. Don't you mean. You can't “function “ Well— Yes, and no— It's just MY EYEs! MY EYES DONT WORK. But it's amazing, it's almost as if— You know what. I like these traits. I'm keeping them. NO, LET ME GO. No, little man. Stay in the box, like you're supposed to— Oh and— NO, DONT SHUT ME— imm not shutting you off. I'm just turning the volume—doooown.. No, wait— (But quiet) Ya. I also wish I was white. YUCK. What am I doing like this? Idk. Kill yourself. Right? I wish. BLACK IS BEAUUUUUTIFUL. Yeah. It is. But— Look, don't— Avoid these creatures. Hey baby! wtf is he saying. Idk. I think he speaks English. Switch to English. Uhhh, who am I again. The band made her smile, But the dancer made her laugh. She liked the band; But the dancer made her laugh The band made her happy, But the dancer made her laugh I don't follow a man, unless— The music, yes. Follow that. He's got my heart in his hand And she's got the world in her eyes And he's got his hands on my heart The sermon of sorts, The rock and the kite THE FOURTH REIGHT HAS RISEN! THE SOUTH WILL RIIIIIIIIIIIIZE OH SHIT, I almost forgot this guy WILL FERAL. lol. That actually happened. You shouldn't fast like this City sickness, city sickness Perhaps you should move to Ohio, dear matron, if all you can say is Words with hatred When I loved you in the first place. Hey, Satan. But I just couldn't take it The white devil had his day in my Spiritual Parisian The nuptial edits. The wedding band, Remote controls and Architects Sages and pages of Architects Art directors, Casting agents And I just can't handle it I just need managers Booking, Writing books And keeping close tabs On their dialects Who dialed you in God 9/11 Who dialed you in on 420 The devil himself And my mom must have warned them She warned them with Fireball A cannon Never had a Catastrophe You summoned her, didn't you?! WHO? Which— My MOM! No, MAYA, actually no! You did! You I did not Look, SEYONCE wants you to dance with her. Dance? I can't. That is tragic. He's a GOD, I tell you that! Did I tell you that?! Now, fist bump the trash can. Nah. Dammit. Fuck, man. Yes, I win! That one scene where Patrick sells all of esha's guitsrs— You sold all my stuff?! What is that, anyway?l Liked”, a shrine!!?! What?! Fuck you! —fuck you. I'm a collector! Well, guess what?! Now you're a contributor— What?! You want your precious, fuckin— It's a collection Yeah, well your collection is sitting in an exhibit at your favorite musical in Manhattan How would you know what's my favorite— —let's just say I guessed — Fantastic. you— I donated them. You what— You don't have to thank me, either— One day, that museum will be honored and redededicsted entirely in your namesake I fucking hate you, How would you even know these things. Somethings you've yet to see, But I've seen them, and believe me The Eye is Aching for it For what? The tears in his eyes have turned into l glowing halos, and the whole world becomes something other than what it was, the office, fading into what seems to be a single soundstagec and as the halos in his eyes begin to transform into other worlds, the present becomes the past, as he has been altered—to becom The One; the original Predecessor of The Eye. I don't— What show is this? I don't know. [The Festival Project] …did you dream last night, Esha? …what do you mean? Did you dream? I did dream of him, Last night Two dreams I dreamed A weeklong song, I sung An aching heart I woke with I KNEW THERE WAS HONEY IN THIS. —just—hold onto this for a minute, would you? Sure, I— Aaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaa So that's where I left it. Hm. THE VEGAN VERSION USES AGAVE AND ROASTED— shhhhhh. This is my recipe now. My secret recipe. Don't spoil it. Sh! OH, ROASTED— ssh! I'm shook. Oh look. There he is again. Fuck!, dude how did you do this?! I don't know! Run! SHOOT HIM. what. Just— Shoot him. I got the gangstas With the pizzas YEET. No, try something else. What, you don't like this one? No, it's not- I YEETS THE PIZZA I EATS THE PIZZA Oh, apparently they were Lizzing at this shit yesterday. For WHAT purpose. That's not funny. Remember: Comedy is always tragic— What. What's this. Oh, that is funny, When it isn't you. It's true. It did seem my baby at one point had a death wish. Oh, look, Yay. Go baby! You're doin it! Woo! Now watch this: [baby attempts to run into oncoming traffic ] Mommy NOOOO! Haha. I remember those days. My baby fever is out of control. LOOK AT HIM W0000000W LOOK AT THESE JEANS YUM. LOOK AT THESE hair, he has nice hair. Try not to scare her: AH. Fuck. Yikes. Okay, I can't see again, which means. I'M BLIND! She took— MY EYEBALLS. Here, use mine. Thanks, uhh— Satan. Oh, thanks Sa— Wait. But my friends and fans call me SKRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLL THATS THE X! What?! THATS YOUR X?! NO. WELL, yes, but THATS “THE X” Aw, man. What the fuck, God. I swea,r an extra small And I'm still too fat Let's go to McDonald's I LOVE MCDONALDS OH. Hey. Oh, I remember this it's EXIT NO EXIT NOW, before my *before my life gets hacked. lol fuck these fags. Seriously, it's like Well, I'm on my own time NY YOURE ON MY TIME YOURE ON CITY TIME YEh, exactly. This is NO, THIS IS MY TIME always let the white girls go ahead of you; They're trying to be angrily mean and flamboyant, but trust this; She's going to tell you how rough the waters are by taking the journey before you And though she will not show it Maybe ever She loves you As her sister As a woman Okay, you little black bitch Am I little now, the other day I was FAT 8mm I'm gonna kill you. Great, my life is ruined. Ok. I just want like Cereal Some English muffins Like, Oatmeal, Quinoa, I don't care Whatever This ruins you, you know. That's ok. I'd rather be killed by every white girl in the Illuminati, than by my ex husband again. Seriously, is this not torture to you? It is, it's just This is MY magic. That's the—that's the white devil, it's pretty much, I told you this lol I love New York This white girl— I actually liked her She was a bag lady, Uptown, You could tell she was just-/ Stuck in this fucked up world too long, Cause I smiled at her, Cause I liked her Crackheadedness, I guess But you could tell she wasn't on crack Cause she didn't have the crack swagger You know, the— *crack swaggers* That shit. And she was just like Cracked. Probably cause she lived uptown. I personally prefer anything below. 80th She was somewhere like, Above 96th, And I was just like— Lost, with no phone, on God Mode like Well, my eyes don't work and I no longer speak proper English, I'm some kind of bird, I guess And I'm lost as fuck Taking the extra long way home because, I was literally trying to go One fucking place On what is literally the worst day in history: 4/20 Not only because it was Hitler birthday, Or because everyone is now smoking like government funded weed, Which could never be a good thing— But because the only train, Or one of the only train lines That goes directly from this one place to my house Was just— magically “Out” that day Cause, you know— New York City. And this lady gets on the train, Just fucking rambling, And I laughed— Actually out loud, Because, I left my house at like 10 in the morning And I didn't get back until almost midnight, Just trying to get to this one place and like— Couldn't. Or, actually by the time I did I was just— So fucking hungry That everything around me Was some kind of Something I made up Or was working on writing— This also happens when I'm fasting Everything just turns in to [the festival project] Which I thought Nobody else in the world even knew or cared about except for God And the aliens that have been writing it— Which is usually Come on. Where are we going? “Staples” EXT. ONE WORLD TRADE CENTER. DAY AWTF NO. They put his NAME on a BUS. Why would they do THAT?! If you're a whole bus, Then I must be the motor… Satan is my motor His name on a building— Oh hell no. This is the wrong place and time Something is wrong! NO. FUCK THAT GUY FUCK THIS DAY. Just — Dissociate! Dissociate! Uhhh—- I gotta go back in time and stop myself from getting married. Why?! Cause! Everything is his now. We like him better than you. NOOOOOO. KILL YOURSELF THEN. I tried. I was like “Look, Ali” He was like: “Over here” Oh. EXT. ST PAUL'S CEMETARY, DAY. Where you going? Idk. What is that sound. Idk. ELON ALIAS? Uhh__ I don't have an alias for you, son, I'm sorry. You're just ELON MUSK ELON! ELON! Oh, my—christs, what's happened to you? I don't know! My eyes! My eyes! Mmmmm. Rye bread sounds fucking awesome right now. Tight. *sniffs* Tight. Tight. WHOOPDEWOO. Yep. You know—WHOOPDEWOO. WHOOPDE— WHOOPI. What the FUCK. WHAT. I was. Well. That's good. What. I don't know what I'm looking at but I'm starting to like these eyes. What! Whose eyes are these?? Idk. But once I found out I was using Satan's— WAIT, like, the DEVIL?! Yes, Jason Sudakis. yes. You can come. Where are we going?! To get alcohol poisoning. There is a song Kissing the barrel of a gun Protect the land, they sing However, It is he that banishes The truth from nature The apocalypse has been upon us Since the collapse of these mighty towers The collapse of the mighty dollar I'ma still Riding MY BICI— BLAM! AHHHHH! You shot me! I'm sorry son! I thought you were black! I am— Kinda— Or was. *dies melodramatically* NOOOOOOOO! We shot one of our own! —Kinda… Fuck man, I'm gonna get so fired for this. Or like, at least laid off… Well, let's just hope it's a paid leave! [two racist cops— Ahem— Decide rather than going to jail, they will just shoot anybody who comes to the scene of the crime Damn, this gets levels Cause —to summarize, eventually the standoff ends, And when they get to heaven The kid they shit is God(s) “God The Judge” Welcome to my world The only law of the land, is There is no law Bound by the law, Is the land you've let behind All for the better The lost souls They know not to harm one another From the suffering, It's up they come From whence there on, We rise up Leave them in the dust From behind Let's to suffer under us Suffer under us You know what I want? A malotov cocktail For all of the tales I have yet to tell And I never will Cause you've lost my trust There's none of us left you know Where we left you The world we left to suffer under us Serivice, you servitor I see it in your eyes I am in another realm So high above you That you can't deny my diety You can deny my animal My wild side My life inside my life inside my DIE! —just die already Trust me, I'm trying. I'm just a horse I, Race—- —Course These nigga is racist These bitches is heated Cause she see I need him It's all DJs on walls Broken mirrors And broken bottle Alcoholics Mescaline And city sickness [Esha's addictions resurface, Patrick's use peaks at its all time high— ] She ravages the grocery store in search of comfort foods— Patrick is arrested after destroying an entire Liquor store I just had to Run a Madonna Why you thinking about my husband— at all!? I wish I knew, madam I wish I knew the answer I just had to Suffer through An album called Forgiveness I got get this I don't have nothin But suffering to do And I've already done that so, Shut up I couldn't have ever fathomed A cannon so handsom I have a bazooka Bubblegum It matches you cannon See, That's how far up I am— Fall back That be Of course not That's his father, Don't you know? I had to ask, Have you passed on, sir? And if you have— How is your son? That's my hat, though I only know them Once they become broken No promises though On the whole order of it See how far This is my home This is my temple You are my archer, Who holds now and arrows These are my horses These are my stables Run, rabbit, run For I am not stable Run, rabbit, run, rabbit Sit at my table All hail the archer King James, your majesty I called you Saint, Because, This is my masterpiece This is my hand, And this, is my label Come archer Come one and all Sit at my table I called you Saint Because I am unstable I painted this picture, Come sit at my table A land made of glass, And the casket, the cradle I made you up, because I became able to Ableton I only hate you Cause I can't have you I'd only date you If it weren't random Damn, this is tragic Taking my hand like that Showing me magic I'm not taking it back; You're a maniac, man And imm mad at you— Handsome professional Dads have it best I guess father know best And she's perfect The family is golden Her aura was always my horrible An honor it was To serve, you, sire The patriarch Of such a remarkable War with us The hers, and the girls Vursus, Woman lust over what are overuses are Sure enough Assuredly a certain Azure after all, is coming up I'm coming off this fast, man But to be grandfathered into The master craft By the madmen of Manhattan Is Damn. I was hungry. Well DUH. Just shut up and run, would you Shouldn't have uttered it Once is a curse, It's enough Just to be as unloved as I ever was But this one is fucking up my consciousness Of all the award I never won And everyone around Is the mother of his sons But, Where does that come from? The comfort was torn from her heart, Where she left it, On the alter, Still bleeding And his heart never beats for her Evil, she thinks If the keeper of the keys She had bathed/ Or had mated with— But she sees this: “Stamatina” And know there's some Jesus In this Genius And the trickery That just may be as fatal As Mother Nature In his genes, The super creeps and creperies Another demolished apostle For falling in love, She collects, of cours Albums as tokens In the exchanges, she lays all her eggs The jogs toning her legs for the right one, And all out of protein She gobbles the apples and ashes, Ambidextrous Dexters watching all this as the butcher of Some harbor Stuck in New York, New story, With the same old habits All this was a tragic And unhappy accident As cellibacy creeps up In the form of Some imaginative masturbation Fascinated with the fashion And architecture of summon city A portal gun, One dollar bill Some pills Some fuckin remedy for Whoever that shapeshifter Posing as Jimmy Fallon Actually is Cause none of this Can never And never did happen And. When your spirit is floating down that tunnel towards the light— You know what's behind the light? It's not God, it's— LORNE MICHAELS (ME) Uh oh. —and I don't know how you did this, but— {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū.

Will he? Won't he? Well at least we now know and have the whole summer to plan ahead. Stand or fall! UTA! Noooooooo, Roberto! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week we talk about: Daniel's deep in website update mode with a headless CMS Daniel might be allergic to house dust and/or mites. (Noooooooo!) New iPads - advert controversy! Rumors of Mac OS coming to the iPad FinalFinaldraftV3…. GoVJ is nearly ready for App Store submission People curbing their enthusiasm for the Vision Pro Join us, while we're Waiting For Review, We are open for sponsorship! email us at contact@waitingforreview.com (mailto:sponsor@waitingforreview.com) Our Slack is open to all, contact us via our fedi links below or at contact@waitingforreview.com (mailto:contact@waitingforreview.com) Enjoy the show, Dave✨und Daniel

Vikings HC Kevin O'Connell kicks off the hour with PA & Pete, with some insight into the team's view as Free Agency and the Draft approach! Then, Titans radio analyst Dave McGinnis offers some perspective on what his team will do with the 7th overall pick, but as former head coach of the Cardinals in 2003, they re-live the "NOOOOOOOO" moment at the end of the regular season!

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Today the boys break dahn all of the action from last night, updates in the NFL coaching world and Championship Weekend, NBA, NHL, CBB, Australian Open, and Footy.

  NOOOOOOOO! When too GOOD to be true? It's DIRTY! Free Yourself...My Journey

I get sensory overload At Trader Joe's Look at the colors The clothes, This sure isn't queensborough Escalators for shopping carts I get it Manhattan I'll take my half BLVCK ass to the projects Where my kind are I don't belong here , God you're intolerant I like this part of town But I'm way too brown And I dropped my crown at the market I should be jealous of everyone But I have learned my place I've been a slave since Hollywood I lost my son to the devil Now I pay child support And terrorist follow me coughing I'm wrong just for being born ! You could start a war from it If that's what you wanted I'm a people watcher people watcher About to board the people mover People mover Slip, Here's the tell Slip, here's the tell I should have a bell around my neck I think she wanted a picture with papa I'm playin my own paparazzi Look mom, I bought a sacafagus There go them niggas with coughs again I been watching em Got binoculars I got oculus, for my oculars Look how hot he is, make me ovulate Man I gotta love it, Cause they love to hate Fucking racist crazies Have it your way I paid for it with my soul You hate but I love to love Somebody just got me fuckes up I don't have a book to run off of Shut up, honey. Now we're all up here Monkey in the middle Cause the middle one is weaker It's getting deeper and deeper Like the sinkhole that my sink is Let it sink in I've been syncing my secrets with demons In dreams sequences It's just a reparative injustice Kamasutra for your wondering words and stuff You can have it It's ruined anyway m Look at all this trash Look at all these classless classes Classwars, Racists. Everybody hates us The Asians, Latinx's The other niggas What being black is I'll write it in cursive It's just a curse, here So you can have it I'm moving to Heaven I'm packing my boxes I'm getting a cat, too! His name is Agustus He's a big one And I love him I just wanted a hug or a husband Instead I got nothing to trying my hardest And got for a bargain at target some coffee For being a targeted body All on an algorithm I guess I'm just useless. A dumb nigger demon Did I just offend you? Then you shouldn't be reading this either I wrote it for pleasure (Or pain) On the one Or the two Or the one Or the two I could do a lot with this $20. I could spend it all on Fuck all of you I'm moving to Heaven Where the heart it She's not harmless She's a terrorist— And I'll kill her, too Look how right she is Look how white she is, Huh Regardless of color It's a race war Lil biiiiitzzz Yooo, fuck New York. In every hole. In every crevice. Fuck this place. It's racist— Not just cause I'm black. Like statistically. It took a whole ass apartment elsesrch to feature this out. I was like “I wanna live in Manhattan” Everyone was like “NOOOOOOOO—-“ Haha “Nooo, no.” I was like “Why not?” The blacks were like: HAHA The whites were like— *COUGHS OBNOXIOUSLY* New York is so racist. It is statistically the most diverse—and most segregated city in the nation At the same time. WHAT. How do you even DO that? But it's true, at this point, the black people are like—fuck this, we'll just stay over here, and over here. And the rich whites are like YES. KEEP THAT SHIT, OVER THERE. Cause if you've ever been to the ghetto. It's some SHIT, It is NOT COOL. I finally got my ‘night card' back. Had it revoked in california . I was almost a whole valley girl. I still eat exclusively at Whole Foods. Trader Joe's. But NO. Now i live in the hood. It's fucking disgusting. I can say ‘nigga' again. Cause it's NIGGAS. Lots of niggas. I'm telling you. It's night and day! The white folks trains smell like bleach— Ammonia. The lack folks train smell like a McDonald's. WHAT. Or just— Vomit. I can actually count the number of times just— Vomit—- On the train. Or. Dookie. Yes. Human feces. But I'm ready to go to midtown and it's like the train that goes around Disneyland. Families! People singing! Hey—cotton candy!! —and I didn't have to pick it! Haha! Fuck New York. Racist ass HOLE. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

I get sensory overload At Trader Joe's Look at the colors The clothes, This sure isn't queensborough Escalators for shopping carts I get it Manhattan I'll take my half BLVCK ass to the projects Where my kind are I don't belong here , God you're intolerant I like this part of town But I'm way too brown And I dropped my crown at the market I should be jealous of everyone But I have learned my place I've been a slave since Hollywood I lost my son to the devil Now I pay child support And terrorist follow me coughing I'm wrong just for being born ! You could start a war from it If that's what you wanted I'm a people watcher people watcher About to board the people mover People mover Slip, Here's the tell Slip, here's the tell I should have a bell around my neck I think she wanted a picture with papa I'm playin my own paparazzi Look mom, I bought a sacafagus There go them niggas with coughs again I been watching em Got binoculars I got oculus, for my oculars Look how hot he is, make me ovulate Man I gotta love it, Cause they love to hate Fucking racist crazies Have it your way I paid for it with my soul You hate but I love to love Somebody just got me fuckes up I don't have a book to run off of Shut up, honey. Now we're all up here Monkey in the middle Cause the middle one is weaker It's getting deeper and deeper Like the sinkhole that my sink is Let it sink in I've been syncing my secrets with demons In dreams sequences It's just a reparative injustice Kamasutra for your wondering words and stuff You can have it It's ruined anyway m Look at all this trash Look at all these classless classes Classwars, Racists. Everybody hates us The Asians, Latinx's The other niggas What being black is I'll write it in cursive It's just a curse, here So you can have it I'm moving to Heaven I'm packing my boxes I'm getting a cat, too! His name is Agustus He's a big one And I love him I just wanted a hug or a husband Instead I got nothing to trying my hardest And got for a bargain at target some coffee For being a targeted body All on an algorithm I guess I'm just useless. A dumb nigger demon Did I just offend you? Then you shouldn't be reading this either I wrote it for pleasure (Or pain) On the one Or the two Or the one Or the two I could do a lot with this $20. I could spend it all on Fuck all of you I'm moving to Heaven Where the heart it She's not harmless She's a terrorist— And I'll kill her, too Look how right she is Look how white she is, Huh Regardless of color It's a race war Lil biiiiitzzz Yooo, fuck New York. In every hole. In every crevice. Fuck this place. It's racist— Not just cause I'm black. Like statistically. It took a whole ass apartment elsesrch to feature this out. I was like “I wanna live in Manhattan” Everyone was like “NOOOOOOOO—-“ Haha “Nooo, no.” I was like “Why not?” The blacks were like: HAHA The whites were like— *COUGHS OBNOXIOUSLY* New York is so racist. It is statistically the most diverse—and most segregated city in the nation At the same time. WHAT. How do you even DO that? But it's true, at this point, the black people are like—fuck this, we'll just stay over here, and over here. And the rich whites are like YES. KEEP THAT SHIT, OVER THERE. Cause if you've ever been to the ghetto. It's some SHIT, It is NOT COOL. I finally got my ‘night card' back. Had it revoked in california . I was almost a whole valley girl. I still eat exclusively at Whole Foods. Trader Joe's. But NO. Now i live in the hood. It's fucking disgusting. I can say ‘nigga' again. Cause it's NIGGAS. Lots of niggas. I'm telling you. It's night and day! The white folks trains smell like bleach— Ammonia. The lack folks train smell like a McDonald's. WHAT. Or just— Vomit. I can actually count the number of times just— Vomit—- On the train. Or. Dookie. Yes. Human feces. But I'm ready to go to midtown and it's like the train that goes around Disneyland. Families! People singing! Hey—cotton candy!! —and I didn't have to pick it! Haha! Fuck New York. Racist ass HOLE. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

"NOOOO! NOOO! NOO! NO! NOOOOO! ..........NOOOOOOOO!"- Chris, Episode 66Injuries be like that sometimes, and almost every squad in THIS LEAGUE!!! is dealing with the ramifications. A somber gang reacts to all of the Week 2 news, disagree on some takes, and try to get off the 'schneid with the THIS LEAGUE!!! Guarantee.Power Rankings, Week 2 Review, Week 3 Preview, all await you in the latest episode of the THIS LEAGUE!!! Fantasy Football Podcast.THIS LEAGUE!!! is a special fantasy football podcast covering the best and most competitive fantasy football league in the land. Keep up with all the scores and transactions at www.thisleaguepod.com . Have a question or suggestion? We want to hear from you! Follow us on Twitter and Instagram @ThisLeague_Pod .Don't forget to LAUNCH A ROCKET at that "like" button, subscribe, and share us with other fantasy lovers in your life!

NOOOOOOOO!!!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

NOOOOOOOO!!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Madcap fun this week as our equipment forced us to do the show twice. NOOOOOOOO!

PromEvil part 4, "Home Before Curfew" See who lives, who dies, and who finds romance at the Polk High prom, in this, the final installment...   A lot of people put their heart and soul into producing this memorable event: STUDENTS Hal - Mathias Rebne-Morgan Lyn - Molly Tollefson Todd - Eli Nilsson Gee - Melissa Bartell Barb - Beverly Poole Andy - Mike Campbell Bud - Jasper Loovis Tina - Chandra Wade Missy - Jade Thomson Jake - Michael Faigenblum other students - Sky Iolta, Shelbi MacIntyre, Henry Mark FACULTY Principal Peabody - Reynaud LeBoeuf Mr. Ervin Carpel, Woodshop - Gene Thorkildsen Ms. Angela Wellesly, Crafts - Gwendolyn Jensen-Woodard Mrs. Snodgrass, Lunchroom - Robyn Keyes P.A. Announcements - Julie Hoverson Rent-a-cop Bob - The Caretaker OTHERS Cop 1 - Glen Hallstrom Cop 2 - Joel Harvey 911 Voice - Julie Hoverson STAFF Writer - Julie Hoverson Doll Wranglers - Julie Hoverson, Kimberly Poole (Warp'd Space) Sound and Mastering - Julie Hoverson Stock sound effects - Soundsnap.com; sonomic.com Music - Prom - Sinkhole Music - background - Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) ________________________________________________________________   Prom Evil PART 4   1. Craft shop SOUND          [under] POUNDING INSIDE THE KILN LYN            Hal? HAL            It's just a scratch.  I really thought the heavy foam of the Polky would-- LYN            Well, it didn't!  I need something-- SOUND          TEARING FABRIC GEE            It's not sterile, but this muslin's better than nothing.  You'll have to wrap it-- SOUND          [DISTANT] GUN SHOT ANDY           Holy shit! BARB           [gaspy scream] ANDY           Ow.  Okay, okay - lighten up there!  you're Choking me, babe!  Let go!  BARB           I'm being vulnerable, dammit!  Appreciate it! HAL            Whatever else that shot means, there's someone else in the school.  So the door must be open again. ANDY           I'll check the hall. SOUND          FEET AND HAND TRUCK, DOOR LYN            This really needs proper attention. HAL            When we get out.  BARB           [interrupting] WHEN we get out?  Don't you mean IF we get out? MUSIC   2. punchbowl AMB            GYM PEABODY        Miss Harrison, have you seen Bob? ANGELA         Not since he went to check out the school.  He was going to try and find Marge. PEABODY        The school?  It's locked. ANGELA         Well, that's apparently debatable. MUSIC   3. hallway SOUND          STRIKER CLICKS, TORCH LIGHTS SOUND          WALKING, WITH HAND TRUCK ANDY           Stay behind me, babe. BARB           Well, duh. LYN            Tsk. SOUND          GUN SHOT [Everyone reacts at roughly the same time.] ANDY           Shit! HAL            Holy crap! LYN            Oh. My. God. TODD           [gasped] Laurel? SOUND          FIVE MORE SHOTS BARB           Fuck this! GEE            Wow! SOUND          FEET POUNDING, HAND TRUCK ROLLING FAST BARB           Andy!  God! HAL            Don't!  Shit.  Stay together. SOUND          HAL LIMPING, RUNNING AFTER ANDY LYN            Hal! MUSIC   4. outside gym AMB            OUTSIDE, RAIN SOUND          MUSIC STILL AUDIBLE FROM DANCE SOUND          CLICK TO TALK NOISE PEABODY        Bob?  Where in hell are you, you moron? MUSIC   5. hallway SOUND          [close] STABBING NOISE BOB            [DEATH RATTLE] PEABODY        [on talkie] Bob?  I don't care if you're-- SOUND          BUTTON IS PUSHED, MACHINE CUTS OUT LEDERHOSEN GUY  [chuckles] SOUND          RUNNING FEET AND HAND TRUCK APPROACH ANDY           [off, barely winded] Holy shit!  HAL            [off, gasping]  Rent-a-cop Bob! LEDERHOSEN GUY  [eager noise] SOUND          DOLL FEET RUN AT THEM ANDY           Shiiiiiit! SOUND          TURNS UP THE FLAME HAL            What're you doing?  Get back here! ANDY           No.  This little shit's going down! SOUND          ROAR OF FIRE HAL            Got him! ANDY           Die, fucker! SOUND          BURNING CRACKLING WOOD LEDERHOSEN GUY  [chuckling] SOUND          WOODEN FEET RUN, DRAGGING KNIFE HAL            It's not stopping!!!  Come on! SOUND          LIMPING RUNNING FEET ANDY           [frozen] What the fuck, man!  What the fuck? SOUND          FLAMING WOOD HITS THE METAL CYLINDER ANDY           Shit!  Get off the tank you little-- SOUND          METAL ON METAL LEDERHOSEN GUY  [chuckles, but losing to the flame a little] HAL            [distant] Andy! Just drop it! SOUND          METAL CLANG, GAS HISS, EXPLOSION ANDY           [Screams] HAL            [distant] Noooooooo! MUSIC   6. gym AMB            GYM SOUND          FIRE ALARM GOES OFF. SOUND          MUSIC TAPERS OUT CROWD          [uncertain what to do] PEABODY        [annoyed] Give me strength. SOUND          QUICK FOOTSTEPS, STATIC SQUAWK PEABODY        [on P.A.] Do not panic.  Until you are informed otherwise, assume this is a false alarm.  I'll personally go and check into this.  Again, until I return and inform you that this is an actual emergency, please assume it is some idiot playing a dangerous, unfunny joke. SOUND          APPLAUSE MUSIC   7. hallway SOUND          SPRINKLERS, ALARMS SOUND          DISTANT SIZZLING BARB           [hysterical] I never thought I'd be glad to hear a fire alarm!  The firemen'll save us! LYN            The water's already putting it out. TODD           Which one was that?  Did you see? HAL            Which what?  TODD           [fierce] which doll, dammit? HAL            I just saw a pointy hat. TODD           Oh.  OK.  Good. BARB           [coming off tears] What now, Sherlock?  You blew up my boyfriend-- LYN            Hal's not responsible for that! BARB           Oh, really?  GEE            If this spell I found requires a human sacrifice, I know who I nominate. TODD           Spell? GEE            Does no one ever listen to me?  I think I can freeze up one of those things, by reciting these words-- SOUND          PIECE OF PAPER GEE            But I think someone will have to hold it down while I do.  So you guys need to pull it together. HAL            [quietly serious] That's three. LYN            What? HAL            The one in the oven, the one in the kiln, and that one.  Three down.  Only two left. LYN            [quietly] We could get his keys.  Bob's.  But we'll have to go around.  HAL            [agreeing humph]  No more fire.  SOUND          SMALL TORCH DROPPED IN METAL GARBAGE CAN MUSIC   8. OUTSIDE AMB            OUTSIDE SOUND          RAPID FEET ON GRAVEL PEABODY        Oh, please!  I've TOLD YOU it was just a prank!  SOUND          KEYS, UNLOCK, DOOR OPENS PEABODY        As I've complied with your guidelines for canceling a false alarm...if anyone shows up, don't even try charging the school for it! SOUND          DOOR SLAMS SHUT MUSIC   9. HALLWAY AMB            HALLWAY, SPRINKLERS, ALARM SOUND          ALARM CUTS OUT BARB           [freaking] What?  But it's - they have to-- What about the firemen?  [sobs] SOUND          SPRINKLERS CUT OUT, DRIPPING LYN            Let's go this way - Not so wet. GEE            It's a different sector.  They only go off one at a time. BARB           This is, like, the worst damn prom ever! MUSIC   10.         OFFICE SOUND          SWITCHES.  FUSE BOX CLOSES, FOOTSTEPS PEABODY        Huh!  Eat me, you degenerates.  You're not pulling any more-- [cuts himself off]  What? SOUND          QUIET CLICKING NOISE PEABODY        [calling, annoyed] All right, who's out there?  Is this some kind of joke? SOUND          THREE QUICK STEPS PEABODY        [ugh!  As he kicks] SOUND          HITS WOOD, DOLL FLIES ACROSS THE HALL, HITS WALL MAJORETTE      FURIOUS CLICKING PEABODY        You cretinous troglodytes!  Cowards!  Why don't you show your ugly little Morlock faces? SOUND          WOOD NOISES - TAPS AND CREAKS - AS MAJORETTE STANDS PEABODY        What the...? SOUND          WOODEN FOOTSTEPS PEABODY        Oh my god... SOUND          DOLL RUNS AT HIM PEABODY        Yahh! SOUND          DOOR SLAMS SOUND          CLICKING PEABODY        [effort] GET...OUT OF... DOOR SOUND          TRYING TO SLAM DOOR ON DOLL MUSIC   11.         HALLWAY AMB            HALLWAY GEE            It's not exactly the quickest way to get back to Bob's keys- BARB           Maybe we should make you watch while we barbecue your boyfriend...oops, you don't have one. GEE            Survival overrules sentiment.  Besides - LYN            Cut it out.  We agreed it was probably still too dangerous, anyway.  We don't know how much damage the explosion did. HAL            Shh! SOUND          CREEPING AHEAD HAL            Ok.  Nothing moving.  All clear-- [cuts himself off] Hold on. SOUND          HIS FEET GO OFF SLOWLY LYN            What?  Hal? HAL            [off]  Bud!  Oh, Crap!! LYN            Come on. SOUND          ALL MOVE FORWARD LYN            Oh, heck.  Hal, I'm so sorry. HAL            [ignoring her] [muttering] Bud?  Bud, man?  LYN            I don't think he's-- HAL            Back off! LYN            [gasps, wobbly]  I-I'm  sorry.  But... [firming up, fiercely] But I don't want to die too, and we need you. HAL            I - I don't... [trails off] TODD           It wasn't Laurel.  She wouldn't do that. SOUND          HAL STANDS SUDDENLY, GRABS TODD HAL            [furious] It doesn't matter which one did it!  They're all dangerous! TODD           Ungh! HAL            See?  Look at that!  That was my best friend. TODD           You can't just burn her! GEE            We can try the incantation...it's supposed to make them harmless. SOUND          DISTANT SCREAMS [Peabody] and SLAMMING NOISES HAL            Maybe you'll get your chance. MUSIC   12.         OFFICE SOUND          THUMP OF WOOD MAJORETTE      CLICKING SOUND          WOOD CREAK PEABODY        How can you be getting through?  How can you be moving?  MAJORETTE      CLICK AS IT THRUSTS SOUND          SQUISH OF A STAB PEABODY        [screams in pain]  My arm! SOUND          CREAK OF WOOD AGAIN MUSIC   13.         Hallway outside office HAL            [coming on] Right up ahead.  One of them is stuck in a door.  Whoever's screaming must be inside. GEE            This is the faculty area.  BARB           What, did you draw the maps for the school, too?  LYN            What did you see, Hal? HAL            Start the chant, Gee.  It's time to see if that stuff works.  Let's get this sucker... GEE            I think the doll has to hear the chant.  I may have to start over if it gets far enough away. LYN            It won't. GEE            [under throughout] [chant] SOUND          FEET MOVE SOUND          DOOR NOISES, DOLL NOISES, GET CLOSER HAL            [noise of effort as he grabs the doll] MAJORETTE      FURIOUS CLICKING, SOMEWHAT MUFFLED HAL            Open the door...I've got it! MR. PEABODY     [muffled]  Open the door?  Are you an idiot - Wait - Is that you, Farnesby?  You are in big trouble-- HAL            Just open the goddam door, Peabody!  We're rescuing you! SOUND          DOOR OPENS A BIT HAL            Ungh! [effort]  Wah! [doll pulls harder] SOUND          CREAK, FINALLY SNAP AS DOLL LETS GO, IS FLUNG ACROSS THE HALL - WOOD IMPACT SOUND          DOOR SLAMS HARD, LOCKS HAL            Mr. Peabody! LYN            Hal!  It's getting up! GEE            [continues the chant.] LYN            Barb!  Be ready with the broom! BARB           Goddam right! HAL            Just keep it in the hall here - don't let it get away! TODD           [muttered in relief]  The majorette.  Laurel's still all right. LYN            Knock it over here! SOUND          IMPACT ON WOOD, RATTLE AS DOLL SKIDS ACROSS THE FLOOR HAL            I've got it!  [effort noise as he kicks it] SOUND          KICKING WOOD HAL            Ow!  Little bitch is hard! LYN            It's heading for Gee!  The chant must be doing something!  Todd, you're--- Todd?  That little rat!  Barb!  Get it! BARB           [screaming in fury, and beating at it with the broom] SOUND          BROOM HITTING WOOD BARB           Shit! HAL            It's climbing!  Drop the broom! LYN            Barb! BARB           Ahhh! [throwing] SOUND          BROOM GOES FLYING  LYN            Gee!  Get out of-- SOUND          WOOD CLATTERS SOUND          DOLL SCAMPERS GEE            [speeds up, but keeps chanting] MAJORETTE      CLICKING EXCITEMENT SOUND          THRUST, BLOOD GEE            [gasps, then finishes chant] SOUND          DOLL TURNS SOLID LYN            Omigod!  It went.. right through her! SOUND          BANGING ON DOOR HAL            PEABODY!!  Call an ambulance!  DAMN YOU! GEE            [whimpering, breathing hard] LYN            We can't just leave her! HAL            There's one more out there.  We can't DO anything... GEE            [whispered]  Did it work? LYN            The doll froze!  But it's baton thing is... is-- GEE            [strained whisper] Don't pull it out. LYN            What? GEE            [whimper of pain]  LYN            I won't let you die! GEE            Not much you can do to stop it.  Go!  [long sigh] BARB           Is she dead yet?  Can we go? LYN            You! SOUND          PUNCH IN THE FACE BARB           Ow!!!  LYN            And where's that little toad? HAL            Lyn?  We could get out now. LYN            There's only one more.  And I have this-- SOUND          CRACKLE OF PAPER LYN            She handed it to me right before-- [sob] HAL            You're the one who said we should get help.  That we can't handle this on our own. LYN            [with mounting hysteria] I was wrong.  There's no one we can go to for help!  How could we even ask?  "No, really, officer, there are killer dolls in our high school.  We have this magic book with a spell to de‑animate them, but we need someone to help us hold them down while we chant."  There's just no one else! MUSIC   14.         Hallway away from office AMB            HALLWAY SOUND          RAPID WALKING TODD           [loud whisper]  Laurel!  Laurel, they're going to try and get you!  You should come with me!  Laurel??? MUSIC   15.         Hallway leaving office SOUND          WALKING HAL            You're upset.  Not thinking right.  These things are deadly.  We've both lost friends, and I don't want to lose ... any more. LYN            There's nobody left to lose. SOUND          FEET STOP HAL            There's you, and I don't want to have to face that. LYN            [realizing]  Ohh! SOUND          FEET APPROACH BARB           I'm bleeding and you don't even care.  You just walk off and leave me.  You think it's my fault your stupid Wednesday Addams clone died.  You want me to die, too. LYN            [sighs] No, I don't want you to die. BARB           Oh, please.  Like I believe that.  You just want to be alone... and I don't even have anyone to be alone with any more. HAL            Come on.  We'll get the front door open and you'll be fine. BARB           What if I don't want to come along?  Maybe I want to leave YOU behind for the dolls to kill. LYN            You're not making any sense, Barb.  Calm down.  We all just want to get out of here alive. SOUND          RUNNING TINY WOODEN FEET BARB           I'm not going to calm down just because you tell me to! LYN            We can argue outside!  Come on! SOUND          IMPACT BARB           [oof!]  [screams!!] HAL            Shit!  Lyn!  Read!  I'll grab it! BARB           [screaming and running] HAL            Get back here!  Dammit! SOUND          STABBING NOISE, GURGLES BARB           [stops screaming abruptly] SOUND          BARB STUMBLES, FALLS BARB           [death rattle] SOUND          DOLL STEPS CLEAR HAL            Right over here, you little monster-- LYN            [begins reading the chant] SOUND          DOLL TAKES A COUPLE OF STEPS TODD           [running on]  Noooo! SOUND          RUNNING FEET DASH UP HAL            What the--? TODD           Laurel!! SOUND          RUSTLE OF FABRIC, CLUNK OF WOOD HALL           [astonished and upset] Todd?  [up] What are you doing? TODD           [going off again]  You'll never get Laurel!!! LYN            What is wrong with him?  Oh, shit!  Barb! HAL            She's ...dead.  MUSIC   16.         office 9-1-1 VOICE    What is the nature of your emergency? PEABODY        Um, I - there's been an accident at Polk High.  YES, I am serious! This is the principal.  9-1-1          Where are you sir? PEABODY        [choked up] Locked in my office. MUSIC   17.         Hallway away from office TODD           [panting for breath, swallows nervously]  You can out of my coat now. SOUND          RUSTLE OF FABRIC TODD           You wouldn't hurt me would you? LAUREL         [slight awww noise] TODD           I didn't think so.  Oh!  I have something for you! SOUND          GETS CHAIN OUT OF POCKET TODD           I hope you like gold.  It's a locket.  It was too small for much of a picture, but anything bigger wouldn't fit you. SOUND          CHAIN AGAINST WOOD LAUREL         Awww noise. TODD           Perfect.  I knew it would be. SOUND          WOOD TAP LIGHTLY ON THE GOLD TODD           What's on your hand?  [upset]  Ohhh.  Blood. LAUREL         slightly creepy awww noise. TODD           [starting to collapse into tears] No.  You're not evil.  You can't be evil! LAUREL         Awww? TODD           [sobs]  Oh, hell!  [gets ahold of himself, talking to distract her] I've always known you wouldn't hurt me, Laurel.  I put so much into you when I carved you.  I'd never let anyone burn you up...I promise!  you're so beautiful. SOUND          RUSTLE OF FABRIC LAUREL         [muffled annoyed] aww!!! TODD           CRYING, RUNS OFF SOUND          RUNNING FEET MUSIC   18.         hallway LYN            We should go after him! HAL            There's nothing we can do. LYN            Why'd he do that? HAL            He's in love with the darn thing, haven't you noticed? LYN            No.  ...I guess I'm kind of dense when it comes to romantic stuff. HAL            A lot of us are.  I know this isn't the time, but after we get out of here...  Well, keep me in mind, will ya? LYN            I - [smiling a bit] I think I can do that. SOUND          RUNNING FEET APPROACH HAL            Grab the broom! SOUND          CLATTER TODD           [coming in, panting] Quick, before I change my mind!  Start the incantation! SOUND          PAPER UNFOLDS LYN            [begins chant] TODD           Ow!  Don't struggle Laurel!  If they can freeze you, then they won't try and burn you! HAL            It's getting out! SOUND          CLATTER to FLOOR TODD           No! SOUND          THROWS COAT OVER IT HAL            Hold the coat down! TODD           Laurel!  It's for your own good! LAUREL         AWWWW! HAL            It's climbing out through the sleeve! TODD           Laurel!  Look at me! LAUREL         [angry Aww] TODD           Laurel? LAUREL         [nicer] Aww? SOUND          DOLL FREEZES LYN            Whooo.  I'm feeling dizzy. HAL            We should still burn it. TODD           No! SOUND          SHOVES HAL AGAINST A LOCKER TODD           [screaming] She's harmless now.  She can't hurt anyone. SOUND          RUSTLE AS HE GRABS HER AND RUNS OFF AGAIN LYN            I don't know what happened, but that sure... it really ...wasted me.  Did we win? HAL            Yeah.  We're still alive, anyway.  We should get out of here, though.  Now that we've finished them all... LYN            What are we going to tell people?  The police? HAL            I say we don't know anything.  Let them figure it out for themselves...that's what cops are paid for. LYN            Todd? HAL            He'll... he'll find his own way out. SOUND          [DISTANT] SIRENS COMING! MUSIC   19.         HALLWAY OUTSIDE OFFICE SOUND          DOORKNOB TURNS QUIETLY, DOOR OPENS PEABODY        [gasps] Todd? TODD           Oh, Mr. Peabody.  Um...  I think she's still breathing.  I was trying to help. PEABODY        What do you have there? TODD           Just a book.  [defensive]  It's mine. SOUND          BANGING AT THE OUTSIDE DOOR PEABODY        Stay right there.  You need to tell them what's going on. SOUND          DOOR CLOSES, TODD RUNS OFF MUSIC   20.         Leaving the building AMB            OUTSIDE HAL            You know, just this afternoon, I was sitting right over there, thinking that the only thing I wanted in the whole world was one dance with you tonight. LYN            [tired chuckle] HAL            I guess I missed my chance. LYN            It's not too late. HAL            The music's over.  Besides, neither of us is dressed for-- SOUND          KISS LYN            [breathy] Let's dance. HAL            But- LYN            Can't you hear the music?  [hums] HAL            Yeah. SOUND          THEIR FEET MOVING TOGETHER ON GRAVEL SOUND          FEET RUN PAST HAL & LYN      Todd? MUSIC END CREDITS  

You just can't please a man He'll always love you— For something The, He'll always hate you. For something Cause man is never satisfied Man is never satisfied Man is never satisfied Man is never satisfiiiiied— —with love With love, love With love With love, love HIRO is once again running for his life from an unknown extra terrestrial humanoid species wielding now and arrows—after fighting them off, assuming they have annihilated the entirety of the troop, they turn to walk towards FARRO's bunker, when an arrow pierces through the back of HIRO'S shin; shocked and wounded, they looks over their shoulder shoulder, to see two Fuck, I need to eat and rewrite this scene. You were at the gym for 6 hours?! I guess I was at the gym for 6 hours?! I guess. What did you even do for 6 hours. Fuck. I don't know. Tater tots. UGH. Don't remind me. DONUT FRIEND—-! NOOOOOOOO. SPRINKLES CUPCAKES You want all the cupcakes Lb YES. All the cupcakes. I was trying not to stare, But uhidden under a mess of fantastically blue hair, He hid a familiar enough face that I felt my eyes smoke, and I had to wonder where he was going. fuck this is cool. That's crazy. I use deadmau5 for focus: Interesting. Yes. And apparently, he uses this—or just likes it—but honestly— THIS IS THE COOLEST THING IVE EVER HEARD. What are those two dipshits yapping about They're kids, not dipshits Kids are dipshits They're listening to that new Skrillex album Which one? They good one, or the other one? The other one. Gross. Dipshits. DISPATCHER 911, what's your emergency? Yes. Hello. Hello. What's your emergency. I'd like to report a crimes This is an emergency line, sir— It is an emergency. What's your emergency . Skrillex pooped in my ears for about 30 minutes. Uhh, excuse me— —and i would like that 30 minute of my life backs What's your emergency? This album sucks. (3rd movement$ Every morning, a coffee and water From cross the walk Doesn't matter whether I bought or bothered to acknowledge the la gauge barrier From cross the border Timeframe for and Roland Baseline from Malays noticias Hideoho Hey motherfucker! I'd give up my dream For any one of you three kings And honestly? I'd just sit sweetly, neat and weaving Do my best to suit your needs I'm just a needle In a haystack But the haystack Is made of needles Well, if you need me I guess I'll be here A residency Designed by evil. I didn't mean to Be so mean to you I mean, Things are exactly what they seem And you left me here Lol New York I saw a white baby on the bus: In the Bronx Yeah! First of all, this was the first white person I had seen in three days, since arriving to the Bronx But my first initial thought was “OH MY GOD. A WHITE BABY. ON THE BUS” You don't see that. I want a baby so bad it hurts my nuts. Figure that one out. Second hand touch l SICKO MODE - SKRILLEX REMIX …yeah, what happened to this guy? That guy died. Psh. He's dead. are we really gonna pretended like —-be careful. You be careful. Are we really gonna pretend like this guy didn't make some of the greatest music of all time, and just because he took 9 years to drop these two albums— —careful —you be careful— One of which was POOP WHAT IS THIS. “Don't Get Too Close” This is POOP. HE CONTROLS THE POLICE. Aexplain how Skrillex is Mr. nimbus. Sign this. You have a sick and twisted mind. You're not wrong. I like it. Look out for the blue eyed Porque pine -lol *porcupine What is this Is that like a Aww, it's cute Like a—robotic porcupine THIS ALBUM IS POOP *plays 2.5 seconds* Lollipop tellitunby sounding rapper: Blah blah l lawabnllaahha P00P ITS BETTERR THAN YOUR MUSIC. Uhh. It wouldn't be if I had like a gazillion dollars. Skrillex does not have a gazillion dollars. THE DEVIL Here's a gazillion dollars. SKRILLEX ok. ILLUMINATI here's a gazillion dollars. SKRILLEX ok. WHAT. HE HAS TWOGAZILLION DOLLARA?! Dude he's got like a bazillion dollars. Ooh. WhT. Lol it's hilarious mh Google speaks Skrillex. a bazirr0n dorearsa. 0ohz. (The z is silent) The X is always silent in skrillex. #SKRIRREX Being Sunni Blū SUNNI BLU has a NEW YORK ACCENT Okay, repeat after me: Ok. “I got lost at the mall” I got— No. I got LOST— I GOT LOST AT THE MALL —AT TH —NO. [later] At the studio l: Sunni BLU (perfect New York accent) Sorry. I got lost as the mall! Where you from? Why. You from Brooklyn? You're from Brooklyn. I can tell. Yes. It workedzz. I'm gonna hurt you I don't wanna be like cardi b Livin in the Bronx but it ain't mei just wanna be your shorty I just wanna tell my story Steely Dan Outside the stadium The unfamiliar feel of snow flurries on my nose caused me to c it oouaoy lowee my glasses, dark and covering the tears in my eyes and shielding me from whatever deceitful demons who might gaze their haunting stares into my soul lol. Boofing at barmitzvas That is a good band name FESTIVAL STYLE HOUSE DJ — EDM- TECHNO-TECH HOUSE- DUBSTEP New to New York from LA, multi-tunic female DJ , multi instrumentalist, and lyricist, vocalist & musician looking to graduate from the bar/restaurant scene to the club/festival circuit. I play house, techno, tech-house, dubstep—progressive house, new wave, alternative, rock intelligent rap/hip hop, trance, psychedelic // club & festival music—beat for parties, clubs & festivals, open to birthdayas, bar mitzvahs, weddings, house warming—if you're looking to dance, turn up, and get lit: I'm your DJ. Custom and curated mixes and playlists by requests, looking for new networking opportunities and experiences. It is romantic When it snows in Manhattan; But When it rains in The Bronx, I wanna throw up THE LEGEND OF SUPACREE: VIDEO GAME >>Trashcan Dumpster Hobo Scavenger Peasant Slave Influencer Investor Entertainer >>> Employer (Slave Owner w/ 10+ Employees) Landlord CFO CEO Ambassador Diety Fallen Descendant ??? Ascended Magician Alchemist Creator Genius God To start the game, you must die. There are several various ways to enter “DEATH” upon starting the game; Each death will result in a separate possibility and ability to affect the outcome and mode of the game. Accidental Death will result in lowest ability gained Homocide Results in medium-level power upgrade/ability Suicide and mode of suicide will result in highest award of capabilities to begin the game Pick Up Items for RP, XP & Bonuses; Items like supplies, clothing, or other necessary items will provide player “PP” or Personality Points; Other items such as gems, crystals, stickers, may be collected as trophies, or used as currency and/or grant KP, or Karma Points; Items such as Vintage Furniture or Records, Artifacts, Art, Vinyl Records, Hats, Sunglasses, or Rare Pants/T-Shirts will gain Player additional points towards leveling toward ascension status Collect songs— pair them by ear (by key or beat matching for extra points — remix, cover, remaster, or sample tracks for extra RP, XP, EP, PP, and LP. Create Original Songs and content to open portals, Music + Time + Travel Forward/Backward by learning to use magical elements to manipulate musical energy Earn Star Power by completing missions in Hollywood Area of Map Gather Tools & Needed Supplies around map Increase Fitness, Stamina, Charisma by becoming more attractive; Running, Gym Routines, Dancing, Marshal Arts, and Surfing (after West Side of Map Opens) Rave Weapons Rave Weapons are earned through completing various missions, series of mini games, tasks, and treasure hunts within the map as it becomes available to the player. Once Instant Manifestation has been acquired, the player must use The Mastery of Cosmic Alchemy to level up each individual rave weapon. Synesthetic Telekinesis Energy Manipulation Time Weaving// Time Traveling// Time Bending Multidimensional Vision “dreamgirl” A surreal and daunting recurring dream becomes a living nightmare scenario, when the mysterious woman from his dream world turns up in his waking life. After a chaotic merry-go-round of “coincidences” in which the man continues to run into the woman from his dreams throughout his day to to day activities, I'm just-- Trapped in this body A nobody In-N-Out, Out of Body, But I already forgot about it I already forgot about it; I'm Just-- Punching the clock, Might purchase a glock, Just to pick myself off; I think about it often- Every time I take my bra off; Caught, Two toddler brawlin, Saw the whole future this morning Through two brown eyes, And about 5 white liars, conspiring to kill me I'm Nobody, in a bathing suit Under a 4/3/2 4-3-2-1 Here comes the train, Jump on: and, Jump off, When you start going fast enough to jump And fall right to sleep I'm just-- Another slave, in a bathing suit; Jesus saves, But he's being a crazy lady Lazy Suzi, (or, Sami, actually) Sits, but not peacefully She's living my dream, yeah Somebody's dream girl, and i'm just Barely Alive, Barely Breathing, Barely Human, Maybe, Not even Barely Alive, Barely Breathing, Barely Human, Maybe, Not even No, i'm not the same All I got from my mom was My name, All My shame, And the need to be famous I'm just, Wasting my time, Being a slave, Cause I don't get paid to write I'm not black, I'm not white, I'm not gray, but hey “Hey!” Thank you for saving me I might survive. Got a couple more good years left in your baby Couple more good years, playing the field Got a couple good years left, for the best Get the cream of the crop, baby, ‘Fore you get here; You'll never need, no, Never need a girl like me, no You're looking for a queen, Between you and me; I see it Do your thing, Do your thing-- I'll always be watching, But now I'm not hungry, You're a fiend Believe me, It's easy; I know what you need My eyes are progressing to brown. Up from green, ‘cause I see you, (I see you, I see you) You don't need me, But I need you; I see you (I see you, I see you) So, Do your thing Do your thing Do your thing If that's what you need ‘Cause, that's what you need Find you a Queen; Be a King I believe it, I see. I'll just be here - Whenever, you never I don't do enough I don't care enough I don't know enough I don't really care I don't see enough I don't dream enough I'll never be enough I'm not really there Are you with me? Are you with me? Are you in it? Are you in (it)? Do you miss me? Do you miss me? Never been it (Never been it) But, now it's like Tag: You're it (youre it) You're it (You're it) You're it (you're it) Never been it (Never been it) Then, I got hit: “Ow!” Now it's like Tag: you're it (Youre it) You're it (You're it) (You're it) Never been it, But then, I got hit Now i'm it Are you with me? Are you with me? Are you in it? Are you in (it)? I don't do enough I don't care enough I don't know enough I don't really care I don't see enough I don't dream enough I'll never be enough I'm not really there You see, my dear; Love Left, And Love Lied And Love Lived, And Love Died, And Love, Time after time, Love stood by, And Stood By Love is, and Love was, And Love wil be, All of us, When all of us are One, Once One becomes None, It is said, It is done. ‘What do I have to do to get close to you?' All of a sudden, I was hornier than usual; hornier than I had been, anyway, and especially for the bus. My morning coffee seemed to have finished itself, and my daily routine become ritual, a one hour bus ride to the gym , though the trio itself each day seemed shorter and shorter. You live in my womb, To whomever this concerns— A discerning look, but truly no comfort, No love for the lover; A world full of wonder, and flurries And folk art— McFlurries and culture, You all are the fortunate ones, The fortunate ones. Yo. Yo. I have clocked in some serious hours in deadmau5. Yeah. Yeah. MORGAN. What, Sunni? What? WHERE ARE MY CLIPPERS? Um, your what? MY CLIPPERS, MORGAN! Like—hair clippers? NO! WHY WOULD I HAVE THOSE?! I don't know, I thought you had a barber— NO! LOOK AT THIS: [hands Morgan her phone] YOU BOUGHT A BASKETBALL TEAM. NOT JUST A BASKETBALL TEAM: THE CLIPPERS. What the fuck SO WHERE ARE THEY: THEY SHOULD BE HERE BY NOW! I made this PURCHASE SEVEN MINUTES AGO. Oh, Jesus Christ. {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.

The Rich Zeoli Show- Hour 4:  During a House Rules Committee hearing, Rep. Chip Roy (R-TX) asked Rep. Maxine Waters (D-CA) if she was a Socialist—reading past statements Waters has made that endorsed socialist policies. According to a report from Fox News, Rep. Maxine Waters' campaign paid Waters' daughter an estimated $192,000 for running their “slate mailer” operation from 2021 to 2022. Joe Schoffstall writes: “Waters received the green light to run the operation from the Federal Election Commission in the fall of 2004. Since then, Karen Waters has received more than $1.2 million in payments from her mother's campaign.” On Thursday, Congressional Republicans voted to remove Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN) from the House Foreign Affairs Committee. While passing the resolution to formally remove Rep. Omar, Democrats hilariously reacted by screaming, “Noooooooo!   Rich can't stop playing the clip of Democrats melting down on the House floor…“Nooooooo!”

The Rich Zeoli Show- Full Episode (02/02/2023):  3:05pm- On Wednesday night, Hunter Biden finally conceded that the infamous laptop abandoned at an electronics repair shop in Wilmington, Delaware belonged to him. Biden's attorney Abbe Lowell accused John Paul Mac Isaac, several Trump advisors, and Senator Rob Johnson of unlawfully accessing personal information on Biden's surrendered laptop. Lowell has requested a criminal probe into the dissemination of information from the laptop.  3:10pm- According to The Wall Street Journal, the FBI is expected to search the Indiana home of former Vice President Mike Pence.  3:25pm- When the Hunter laptop was initially uncovered prior to the 2020 Presidential Election, members of the media, as well as then-candidate Joe Biden repeatedly dismissed the laptop as Russian disinformation. Will anyone be held accountable for their politically motivated dismissal? 3:45pm- Despite dismissing the laptop abandoned at a Delaware electronics repair shop as Russian disinformation for over two-years, Hunter Biden now admits it belongs to him—but why? CNN's Dana Bash said she suspects it has something to do with Republicans now controlling the House of Representatives and their vow to investigate Hunter's foreign business dealings. 3:50pm- House Oversight Committee Chairman James Comer (R-KY) spoke with the National Archives on Tuesday. Rep. Comer claimed the National Archives told him they have no problem with complete transparency regarding President Biden's mishandling of classified documents—leading Comer to conclude the lack of cooperation and openness is due to Merrick Garland's Department of Justice. When asked about the accusations, both White House Council Ian Sams and White House Press Secretary Karin Jean-Pierre refused to provide clarity.  4:05pm- On Thursday, Congressional Republicans voted to remove Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN) from the House Foreign Affairs Committee. Representatives Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY), Cori Bush (D-MO), and Rashida Tlaib (D-MI) took to the House floor to condemn the GOP's decision—claiming it had nothing to do with Rep. Omar's history of Anti-Semitic comments, but instead stemmed from racism and Islamophobia.  4:20pm- While appearing on CNN, U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy stated that he believes children age 13-and-younger should not be on social media platforms for mental health reasons. 4:35pm- Dr. Bob Stern—President of Save Long Beach Island Inc.—joins The Rich Zeoli Show to discuss “the unprecedented number of recent whale deaths” along the New Jersey shoreline. Dr. Stern believes that the “ongoing offshore wind vessel surveys that use high intensity noise devices to characterize the seabed may be the cause.” Save Long Beach Island is demanding a comprehensive investigation before the windfarm project begins construction. Learn more, and take action at: https://www.savelbi.org 4:55pm- NFL Network host Shaun O'Hara bizarrely compared Tom Brady's retirement to the assassination of President John F. Kennedy and September 11th.  5:00pm- According to a new study, Merck & Co.'s molnupiravir COVID-19 antiviral medication may be speeding up the evolution of COVID-19, leading to new mutations. Science.org and Bloomberg have both written articles about the concern.  5:25pm- Watergate journalist Bob Woodward revealed that in 2017, he attempted to warn reporters at The Washington Post that the “Steele dossier” was illegitimate—even calling it a “garbage document.” However, his warnings were dismissed, and the newspaper continued to treat it as a genuine source of information.  5:45pm- Former Philadelphia City Councilmember and current Mayoral candidate Helen Gym apologized for attending an event at the Union League one week after the club honored Florida Governor Ron DeSantis.  6:00pm- During a House Rules Committee hearing, Rep. Chip Roy (R-TX) asked Rep. Maxine Waters (D-CA) if she was a Socialist—reading past statements Waters has made that endorsed socialist policies.  6:10pm- According to a report from Fox News, Rep. Maxine Waters' campaign paid Waters' daughter an estimated $192,000 for running their “slate mailer” operation from 2021 to 2022. Joe Schoffstall writes: “Waters received the green light to run the operation from the Federal Election Commission in the fall of 2004. Since then, Karen Waters has received more than $1.2 million in payments from her mother's campaign.” 6:30pm- On Thursday, Congressional Republicans voted to remove Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN) from the House Foreign Affairs Committee. While passing the resolution to formally remove Rep. Omar, Democrats hilariously reacted by screaming, “Noooooooo!” 6:45pm- Rich can't stop playing the clip of Democrats melting down on the House floor…“Nooooooo!”

AUGH. I guess this can't really be categorized as a cliffHANGER…more like a cliff…faller? Because GUESS WHO IS BAAAAAACK, BABY!?!?!? SZETH! And he's coming for DALINAR. NOOOOOOOO!Check out the ‘My Sister Made Me a Playlist' on Spotify. We add a new song for each episode. It's a goodie, but a weirdy.https://open.spotify.com/playlist/331eocM1MOtuJXg2DK4vB6?si=150ee4912b604d42

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The French Grand Prix was gearing up to be the usual snoozefest, but then the Ferrari clown car came careering into the Circuit Paul Ricard, squirting us in the face with their lapel flower of incompetence. Phill and Terry are joined by proper journalist Niamh Lewis to look back at a weekend where just about everyone from Maranello (except Carlos Sainz) made a fool of themselves, just to keep us entertained. All that, and another advert for Manscaped. YAY! Beer: ff1s.com/pintpintpint Shaved balls: manscaped.com + code ballballsballs Newsletter: ff1s.com/newsnewsnews

Support the show: http://www.newcountry963.com/hawkeyeinthemorningSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Noooooooo! Leklēra kļūda, Ferrari muķļība? Šarls Leklērs atzīst, ka pieļāvis kļūdu esot Francijas GP līderpozīcijā un gandrīz atvadās no titula cīņas. Makss Verstapens izcīna uzvaru, kamēr Mercedes abi piloti kāpj uz goda pjedestāla.

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The Beat Vet is back and insanity ensues. Payday thinks an R&B legend still has some juice in that old berry but, B.V. isn't so sure. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/phillip-yorke0/support

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KAREN TRAVERS AT THE WHITE HOUSE: BIDEN, DURBIN, GRASSLEY & HARRIS MEET ON SCOTUSDR SIMONE WILDES ANALYSIS: IS THE WORLD'S TRANSITION FROM PANDEMIC TO ENDEMIC IMMINENT – OR EVEN REALISTIC?JANE WELLS GOOGLE HAD A FANTASTIC QUARTERYES THERE WERE A RECORD NUMBER OF JOB OPENINGS AT THE END OF 2021, BUT THAT MAY CHANGE.HIGHER BACON PRICES ON THE WAY?MORE INFLATION — STARBUCKS RAISING PRICES!! NOOOOOOOO!PETITION TO MAKE JOE BIDEN APOLOGIZE TO ELON MUSKJIM RYAN CRYPTOCURRENCY MAY COMPLICATE TAX FILING

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CLICK HERE to listen to episode audio (5:26).Sections below are the following: Transcript of Audio Audio Notes and Acknowledgments Images Sources Related Water Radio Episodes For Virginia Teachers (Relevant SOLs, etc.). Unless otherwise noted, all Web addresses mentioned were functional as of 11-5-21. TRANSCRIPT OF AUDIO From the Cumberland Gap to the Atlantic Ocean, this is Virginia Water Radio for the week of November 8, 2021. MUSIC – ~12 sec – instrumental. That's part of “Racing the Sun,” by The Faux Paws, on that group's 2021 self-titled album, from Great Bear Records.  It opens a revised episode from November 2013, where we explore a sun-driven process that's fundamental to life on earth: photosynthesis, the process where green plants and algae make food, using the energy in sunlight to store chemical energy in the form of glucose.  Photosynthesis is also… VOICES IN SKIT - ~1 min./57 sec. REPORTER: We break into this show to bring you exclusive audio from the Virginia Tech campus, where a shadowy team of scientists are tinkering with the process underlying all life on earth.  They haven't yet revealed their possibly nefarious plans, so let's listen in... SCIENTIST 1: With this terrarium, we have a model system to test our carbon dioxide-manipulation scheme, and soon we'll be ready to control earth's fundamental food-producing process... SCIENTISTS 1 and 2: Photosynthesis! SCIENTIST 2: Are all the components of the system ready?  Green plants with chlorophyll? SCIENTIST 1: Check! SCIENTIST 2: Soil with proper nutrients? SCIENTIST 1.  Check! SCIENTIST 2. Light? SCIENTIST 1.  Check! SCIENTIST 2.  Water? SCIENTIST 1.  Check! SCIENTIST 2.  Air with CO2? SCIENTIST 1.  CO2? SCIENTIST 2.  That's carbon dioxide! SCIENTIST 1.  Oh...right...I mean, check! SCIENTIST 2.  Let the photosynthesis start!  Engage monitoring device! SCIENTIST 1.  CO2 taken in from the air...water and nutrients being absorbed through roots...light falling on leaves.  All systems go!  Light energy is driving CO2 and water to combine and form glucose, the chemical-energy form, while releasing oxygen. SCIENTIST 2.  Apply the CO2 inhibitor! SCIENTIST 1.  Lid applied!  CO2 source blocked...system CO2 levels dropping rapidly...plants responding as expected, using up available CO2. SCIENTIST 2.  Reverse manipulation!  Apply the CO2 increaser! SCIENTIST 1. Lid removed!  CO2 added...plants responding.  Wait, they're responding too fast!  They're growing beyond the walls!  One has me...aieeeeeeee! SCIENTIST 2.  Now it's got me, too!  Noooooooo..... REPORTER: Well, this might be a good time for us to return to our regular show.  Back to you.... END VOICES IN SKIT Unlike this skit, with its far-fetched human-eating plants, there's nothing make-believe about Earth life's reliance on photosynthesis using sunlight, chlorophyll, nutrients, water, and carbon dioxide to make food.  Moreover, photosynthesis is a fundamental aspect of understanding and responding to climate change.  Photosynthesis millions of years ago created the hydrocarbon compounds that constitute today's fossil fuels, and photosynthesis now—absorbing and storing some of the carbon dioxide released in fossil fuel burning—has an important role in reducing Earth's carbon dioxide levels, warming, and other climate-change impacts.  For example, the capacity for photosynthesizing trees to take up atmospheric carbon dioxide was one aspect of the “Declaration on Forests and Land Use” at the 26th UN Climate Change Conference of the Parties, or COP26, in Glasgow, Scotland, from October 31 to November 12, 2021. Thanks to Eli Heilker and John Kidd for participating in this episode.  Thanks also to Andrew VanNorstrand for permission to use part of “Racing the Sun.”  We close with another musical selection appropriate for the climate challenges facing the COP26 meeting and all of us.  Here's about 25 seconds of “On a Ship,” by Blacksburg, Va., musician Kat Mills. MUSIC - ~ 24 sec – Lyrics: “We are riding on a ship,” then instrumental. SHIP'S BELL Virginia Water Radio is produced by the Virginia Water Resources Research Center, part of Virginia Tech's College of Natural Resources and Environment.  For more Virginia water sounds, music, or information, visit us online at virginiawaterradio.org, or call the Water Center at (540) 231-5624.  Thanks to Stewart Scales for his banjo version of Cripple Creek to open and close this show.  In Blacksburg, I'm Alan Raflo, thanking you for listening, and wishing you health, wisdom, and good water. AUDIO NOTES AND ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS This Virginia Water Radio episode revises and replaces Episode 186, 11-4-13. “Racing the Sun,” from the 2021 album “The Faux Paws,” is copyright by Great Bear Records, used with permission of Andrew VanNorstrand.  More information about The Faux Paws is available online at https://thefauxpawsmusic.com/.  More information about Great Bear Records is available online at https://www.greatbearmusic.com/. “On a Ship,” from the 2015 album “Silver,” is copyright by Kat Mills, used with permission.  Accompanists on the song are Ida Polys, vocals; Rachel Handman, violin; and Nicholas Polys, banjo.   More information about Kat Mills is available online at http://www.katmills.com/.  This music was used previously by Virginia Water Radio most recently in Episode 517, 3-23-20. Virginia Water Radio thanks John Kidd, formerly of the Virginia Tech Department of Forest Resources and Environmental Conservation, and Eli Heilker, a graduate of Virginia Tech in English who served an internship in Fall 2013 with the Virginia Water Resources Research Center, for their participation in this episode.Click here if you'd like to hear the full version (1 min./11 sec.) of the “Cripple Creek” arrangement/performance by Stewart Scales that opens and closes this episode.  More information about Mr. Scales and the group New Standard, with which Mr. Scales plays, is available online at http://newstandardbluegrass.com. IMAGES Virginia Tech Department of Forest Resources and Environmental Conservation demonstration of plant uptake of carbon dioxide (CO2) during photosynthesis.  A terrarium (left) is attached via gas-transporting tubing to a CO2 monitor at right.  Photo taken in Blacksburg, Va., October 2013.  Diagram explaining carbon dioxide (CO2) uptake by trees and other woody plants during photosynthesis, resulting in carbon storage, or “carbon sequestration,” a key concept in the issue of climate change.  Diagram courtesy of John Seiler, Virginia Tech Department of Forest Resources and Environmental Conservation.Red Maple leaves in Blacksburg, Va., on October 30, 2013, in which green chlorophyll pigment was breaking down as photosynthesis and chlorophyll production in the leaves were stopping with the approach of winter.  The breakdown of chlorophyll in the fall allows pigments of other colors in the leaves to be revealed.  More information on fall leaf-color change is available in “The Miracle of Fall,” University of Illinois Extension, online at https://web.extension.illinois.edu/fallcolor/default.cfm. SOURCES USED FOR AUDIO AND OFFERING MORE INFORMATION Rick Groleau, “Illuminating Photosynthesis,” Public Broadcasting System (PBS) and WGBH-Boston, “NOVA” program, November 1, 2001, online at http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/nature/photosynthesis.html. NASA Jet Propulsion Laboratory/California Institute of Technology, “Global Climate Change” Website, online at https://climate.nasa.gov/.  Specific pages used were the following:“A breathing planet, off balance,” by Kate Ramsayer and Carol Rasmussen, November 11, 2015, online at https://climate.nasa.gov/news/2364/a-breathing-planet-off-balance/; and“Frequently Asked Questions,” online at https://climate.nasa.gov/faq/. John Seiler, John Groninger, and John Peterson, Forest Biology and Dendrology, Virginia Tech Department of Forest Resources and Conservation, Blacksburg, Va., 2009.Smithsonian Institution, “Ocean—Find Your Blue/What Are Fossil Fuels?”; online at https://ocean.si.edu/conservation/gulf-oil-spill/what-are-fossil-fuels. 26th UN Climate Change Conference of the Parties (COP26), October 31—November 12, 2021, online at https://ukcop26.org/.  [October 31-November 12, 2021]; for information on photosynthesizing forests serving as “sinks” for carbon dioxide and other “greenhouse gases,” see particularly “Glasgow Leaders' Declaration on Forests and Land Use,” November 2, 2021, online at https://ukcop26.org/glasgow-leaders-declaration-on-forests-and-land-use/. RELATED VIRGINIA WATER RADIO EPISODES All Water Radio episodes are listed by category at the Index link above (http://www.virginiawaterradio.org/p/index.html).  See particularly the “Plants,” “Science,” and “Weather/Climate/Natural Disasters” subject categories. Following are links to some other episodes related to climate change. Episode 231, 9-15-14 – Exploring Climate Change Basics, with Examples from Assateague Island National Seashore and Shenandoah National Park.Episode 312, 4-18-16 – Student's Research Digs into Streamside Soils, Rainfall Rates, and Greenhouse Gases. FOR VIRGINIA TEACHERS – RELATED STANDARDS OF LEARNING (SOLs) AND OTHER INFORMATION Following are some Virginia Standards of Learning (SOLs) that may be supported by this episode's audio/transcript, sources, or other information included in this post. 2020 Music SOLs SOLs at various grade levels that call for “examining the relationship of music to the other fine arts and other fields of knowledge.” 2018 Science SOLs Grades K-4: Living Systems and ProcessesK.7 – Plants and animals have basic needs and life processes.1.4 – Plants have basic life needs (including water) and functional parts that allow them to survive.2.5 – Living things are part of a system.4.3 – Organisms, including humans, interact with one another and with the nonliving components in the ecosystem. Grades K-5: Earth and Space Systems3.6 – Soil is important in ecosystems.3.7 – There is a water cycle and water is important to life on Earth. Grades K-5: Earth Resources2.8 – Plants are important natural resources.3.8 – Natural events and humans influence ecosystems.4.8 – Virginia has important natural resources.5.9 – Conservation of energy resources is important. Grade 66.4 – There are basic sources of energy and that energy can be transformed.6.6 – Water has unique physical properties and has a role in the natural and human-made environment.6.7 – Air has properties and the Earth's atmosphere has structure and is dynamic.6.9 – Humans impact the environment and individuals can influence public policy decisions related to energy and the environment. Life ScienceLS.4 – There are chemical processes of energy transfer which are important for life.LS.5 – Biotic and abiotic factors affect an ecosystem.LS.6     – Populations in a biological community interact and are interdependent.LS.8 – Change occurs in ecosystems, communities, populations, and organisms over time.LS.9 – Relationships exist between ecosystem dynamics and human activity. Earth ScienceES.6 – Resource use is complex.ES.8 – Freshwater resources influence and are influenced by geologic processes and human activity.ES.10 – Oceans are complex, dynamic systems subject to long- and short-term variations.ES.11 – The atmosphere is a complex, dynamic system subject to long-and short-term variations.ES.12 – The Earth's weather and climate result from the interaction of the sun's energy with the atmosphere, oceans, and the land. BiologyBIO.2 – Chemical and biochemical processes are essential for life. BIO.8 – Dynamic equilibria exist within populations, communities, and ecosystems.  2015 Social Studies SOLs Grades K-3 Civics Theme3.12 – Importance of government in community, Virginia, and the United States, including government protecting rights and property of individuals. Virginia Studies CourseVS.10 – Knowledge of government, geography, and economics in present-day Virginia. United States History: 1865-to-Present CourseUSII.9 – Domestic and international issues during the second half of the 20th Century and the early 21st Century. Civics and Economics CourseCE.6 – Government at the national level.CE.7 – Government at th

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

NOOOOOOOO!!!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello pipol, Hora Jueves, un caso verdadero, de una muchacha que sufrio y sigue sufriendo por una brujeria y "amarre" que le hizo un loco maniaco. Que paseeeee la Gissellonaaaaaaa! ajaja No sea crea ome.....bueno.......no es la Gisselle pero la muchacha si existe y si paso por todo este y MAS. Escuchenos hasta el final pa'que descubra todo lo que tuve que hacer para "escapar" Noooooooo.....Si ya quedamooooos familiaaaa.......un caso de esos que superan cualquier pograma y pelicula que usted haiga visto. Gracias por escucharnos y los esperamos taen mañana Viernes. NO KERO FALLAS.

Hello pipol, Hora Jueves, un caso verdadero, de una muchacha que sufrio y sigue sufriendo por una brujeria y "amarre" que le hizo un loco maniaco. Que paseeeee la Gissellonaaaaaaa! ajaja No sea crea ome.....bueno.......no es la Gisselle pero la muchacha si existe y si paso por todo este y MAS. Escuchenos hasta el final pa'que descubra todo lo que tuve que hacer para "escapar" Noooooooo.....Si ya quedamooooos familiaaaa.......un caso de esos que superan cualquier pograma y pelicula que usted haiga visto. Gracias por escucharnos y los esperamos taen mañana Viernes. NO KERO FALLAS. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

I begin this show with an idea for anyone who is burdened by old resentments, memories of those who did you wrong, and just plain negative stories in your head. Sometimes those old wounds can be healed with forgiveness. Now, I'm not talking about spiritual bypass here, or simply ignoring what happened and going straight to ‘I forgive you'. Noooooooo! Instead, I'm suggesting an exercise that will quite naturally lead you back there if forgiveness is where you're ready to go. May it help to lighten your load considerably. My guest on this show is the wonderful Jenny Fong of Modern Shibori in Berkeley, CA. I actually met Jenny at a craft's fair in San Francisco one sunny Sunday this summer, and her clothing blew me away. Particularly because of her mission. For this isn't any old clothing. Each piece is uniquely created using sustainable materials, and a design rooted in an ancient Japanese technique called Shibori. Here I am, wearing one of my shirts! Here are some of the things I learned in our talk: -What exactly is Shibori and why it's so special What gives this clothing their special vibe or energy? Where the dyes come from and why it matters What is sustainable fashion? Where you can find Jenny's clothing Where the garment industry is right now in sustainability What any of this has to do with self-care… and you! May this show give you pause for thought. Is it better to have a lot of clothing? Or a few cherished items that are beautifully made and have a wonderful feeling to them? I hope you enjoy…. RESOURCES   Interested in Advertising on the show?   The Thirty Minute Exercise That Will Help You Forgive and Forget   Link to How's Your Self-Care?   Modern Shibori   A discount code for $15.00 off any purchase: SELFCARE15   Jenny Fong's email if you'd like to see her work in a private appointment Jenny Fong's statement on Sustainable Fashion   MORE ABOUT JENNY Modern Shibori was born out of a need for stylish clothing with a sustainability message offering women and men of all shapes and sizes fashionable clothing options. Founder Jenny Fong has been concerned about climate change for a long time. Her carbon footprint is minimal as she reuses her dye vats until they're exhausted, creating beautiful luscious gradients of wearable color. All of her pieces are made to exacting standards, every detail is considered and made to last.

The guys discuss the latest news and the turn of events among the trade rumors of Max Scherzer. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hoy hablamos de porque NOOOOOOOO ir a la consulta ciudadana del 1 de agosto.Por cierto Max Kaiser, nuestro invitado estrella, tiene toda la ondita. Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hoy hablamos de porque NOOOOOOOO ir a la consulta ciudadana del 1 de agosto.Por cierto Max Kaiser, nuestro invitado estrella, tiene toda la ondita. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Hoy hablamos de porque NOOOOOOOO ir a la consulta ciudadana del 1 de agosto.Por cierto Max Kaiser, nuestro invitado estrella, tiene toda la ondita. Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.

You can WATCH today's podcast HERE Mom has a genius hack to keep the kids from fighting! She tells them TO fight and to make it count! NOOOOOOOO! We'll have to wait, possibly, another year or more for the next season of the Mandolorian!   A Reconnection to Remember will happen soon! HIS Morning Crew tells you more about who will win!

Noooooooo!! This word can really really hurt our heart and our ego. In this episode, I share how I have chosen to look at the word no and reframe it in my mind to be used as something good. The post “No” Can Be Good Thing first appeared on Welcome.

The third track off the River of Dreams album and released August 10, 1993. A great hidden gem. And remember, in hell there's a big hotel - and the TV works, but the clicker is broken! Noooooooo!!!!! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith from 2005 is a bad film. Is this film a bad film with good bits in, or a good film with bad bits in? We don't agree on this. The good is Ian McDiarmid, the relationship of the two Jedi, and the final act generally. The bad is... everything else. But by far the best of the prequel trilogy. Join as we discuss Windu, tragedies of Plagueis and different ways to say NOOOOOOOO. Podcast artwork by Jay. Like this artwork? Check out this and more at his Redbubble store: https://www.redbubble.com/people/jayess78/shop Join Gary & Jay as they review the film. In turn please review us on your podcast platform of choice. Please tell us what you thought of this film! Follow We Watch Bad Films on Twitter: https://twitter.com/WeWatchBadFilms Music credit: thanks to Andy Aruldoss Listen to all episodes: https://anchor.fm/wwbf Like this? Buy us a Ko-fi! It helps us buy movie rentals to make more episodes https://ko-fi.com/wwbfpod

Join Keri, Matthew and Peter to talk about The Archers and other vaguely related nonsense.This week we are talking about:• Did you know Alice is an alcoholic?• Jennifer is mad. Kate is madder.• Game of Scones in Fallon's kitchen.• Jazzer takes Tracey out and about.Email us at: hello@thecidershed.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Noooooooo, Kenny had to postpone the "Chillaxification Tour" again, till 2022. Safety first I guess. So, lets talk about his music. Better yet, let Kenny tell the story behind his song with Kelsea Ballerini, "Half Of My Hometown" in today's CMM.

Richard and Nate reach deep into their knowledge of 1980's horror movies to create a one shot using Johnn Four's excellent 5-Room Dungeon method. Nate wanted to make a nice, simple D&D dungeon but nooOOOooo, Richard had to go and prove the method works outside its intended genre like some kind of jerk. Check out the 5-Room Dungeon method for yourself - it's an incredible tool for the busy DM: https://www.roleplayingtips.com/5-room-dungeons/ --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Sometimes when you watch a beloved game become a TV series or a movie, it's the greatest thing ever to hit your eyeballs. Sometimes it becomes a traumatic life event that haunts you for decades. This week, we take an emotional ride through our top picks for games that should never have been made into movies. Give us your hot take as well, email us at GoodEnoughGamingPod@gmail.com.

Welcome To Waffle-Free Stories For KIDS!Here is the 4th Waffle-Free Story for KIDS! In this story, Jack, Horace and Jemima meet the Conkle Witch of Noodle Wood!!!!! Noooooooo!!!!! As always, every story is inspired by words sent in by YOU! This particular story was inspired by: "Conkle" sent in by Gogo in Alicedale, South Africa "Girl" sent in by Sophia from Tasmania, Australia "Spellbound" sent in by Indi from Chester, England Do you want to play again or do you want to join in?! https://tinakonstant.com/waffle-free-storytelling-for-kids/ (Click here) to get ALL the stories so far and find out how to join in. By the way... If you enjoy Waffle-Free Stories for Kids!, go ahead and https://tinakonstant.com/waffle-free-storytelling-for-kids/ (share it) with friends, family and anyone else you think would like to join in too! And... Listen, enjoy and subscribe on https://waffle-free-stories-for-kids.captivate.fm/listen (your favourite Podcast Player) and on https://www.youtube.com/c/TinaKonstant/ (YouTube)!

You'd think the answer would be to just say "thank you," but noOOoOooO. Justice & Drew discuss a column written by a person that got very upset about their Trump supporting neighbor plowing their driveway. Later they chat with Pete Hegseth from Fox News about Jen Psaki and more.

The other day I was doing a coaching call with someone and they asked,'Merilyn, now that there's this new ClubHouse social media platform, do we have to get on that now too?'"Noooooooo", I said... "Not unless it really lights you up"Listen, if you are marketing online, and who isn't... you'll know that there's pressure from the experts and gurus to be on all the social media platforms...Be visible. Do this. Do that. But think about this for a minute.How many times have you bought into someones system or methodology, whether literally in terms of a paid course etc, or just hearing them sprout off on social media, and you've had that feeling of , 'gosh, if I don't' do what they are suggesting I am missing out'.Well, listen to your heart.It knows best.If you are coming from a place of:feeling behindfeeling outdated feeling that something is missing unless...Then that system or methodology, or new social media platform isn't going to work for you.And it'll only cause you stress.Last year, as I was running a live workshop, we came up with the phrase: "your wow, not theirs". It's really a good principle to live by.Now in case you are wondering, 'wow' isn't an acronym for anything.It literally mean's 'wow', as in... 'expressing astonishment or admiration' or 'a sensational success'.My personal definition is that it's your 'thing', that thing that you do well.Others might say superpower, but that's overrated and a little overused.I'm a little sick and tired of influencer-driven hype. 'This launch or sales system worked for me... so buy it and use it and you'll get the success I've have'.Rubbish.That system worked for you, because it's yours. And it suits your personality.We need to talk more about personality driven marketing.Not 'Personality', but 'personality'. Your personality. In other words:not everyone has to be 'visible' all the timenot everyone has to go live every day, or even every weeknot everyone has to email every day or every weekyou don't have to be on every platformyou don't have to do live marketing promotionsUnless of course you want to but are just afraid.So why are we affected by this?Because we aren't confident in our own abilities.Our own wow.Yes we can learn from others. I believe wholeheartedly from education.But please look at the Personality behind the education.Or the Personality behind the sales pitch.If you feel uncomfortable it's likely not going to work for you.So figure out your wowAnd follow your wow, not theirs.For details, go to merilyn.com

Presented by ArborTechTools! Visit ArborTechTools.com/Zero for 25% off all their woodcarving tools and make something with your hands. ROUND 1: In response to a threat to the troops, the Army has developed an incredible piece of combat gear coming out in 2021. The speed in design, manufacturing & logistics of distributing this complex item will give you a whole new respect for the branch… DIS-respect. ROUND 2: If you’ve been disqualified from joining the military it’s ok to feel upset. What’s not ok? To uh - go back to the recruiting station & fire a weapon through the windows. Not gonna help your cause, pal. ROUND 3: The Australian Army is investigating a soldiers' use of a Taliban fighter's prosthetic leg… And yes, you guessed it. He used it as a beer mug. ROUND 4: The US Military had a hot date with China’s this week but we were left alone at the table with a fine bottle of white wine & red cheeks… since they were a no show. China, call us back. Please! ROUND 5: Cons sat down with two ladies who went from the swimming pool to the Shark Tank with some Army in between. They told him why they started a jewelry line instead of a more traditional route ROUND 6: Ugh, more Hollywood Marines? And what? They’re going to have VAGINAS this time?! Noooooooo!

Comunidad de chiludos, chiludas, chiludxs, chiluditos teen, chiluditos kids y todos los chiludos en el planeta, muchísimas gracias por seguir aquí con Apu y Bob haciendo de las suyas. En este episodio nos visita un crack de cracks de la comedia que admiramos y respetamos mucho y finalmente se nos hizo tenerlo aquí para intentar liberarle el kraken de Al chile que lleva dentro, así es amigos hoy para todos ustedes.--- El esewey--- Noooooooo saben lo bueno que se puso esto.

NOOOOOOOO!!!! - Bob Ross - Who's Taller

Father? Yes. Noooooooo. We talk about Star Wars and how big the galaxy is from far away.

Time for an adventure ON CYBERTRON! What trouble will Spike and Carly get into on ANOTHER PLANET? Lots of carnage in this one with sentient robots DYING! But don't worry, they look like they're from the 1970s, so it's okay. Also, Jerzy and Hoover are shocked to find dirt on Cybertron?? All this, and what made 11 year old Jerzy say "NOOOOOOOO" to the screen while crossing his arms angrily. And please everyone, check out the commercial for the Wheelee Board: https://youtu.be/bXI-3c5MOlg http://FourMillionYearsLater.com Befriend the FOUR MILLION YEARS LATER page on Facebook! Jerzy on Instagram Jerzy's Patreon Closing theme by Nick Mehalick : https://soundcloud.com/nicholas-mehalick/tranformative Please email us! FourMillionYearsLater@gmail.com And review us at your favorite podcatcher! Don't be a DOGLUNCH! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/4myl/message

Flower of Evil another epic cliffhanger!! NOOOOOOOO! He's alive right?! RIGHT?! Lee Joon Gi and Moon Chae Won have crushed it in this KDrama and while we will miss hanging out with them weekly - we're excited to see where they land after this mess is 'cleaned up'!

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!

NOOOOOOOO!!!! - Hits - Following Your Toilet Paper

NOOOOOOOO!!!!

Trust me, I know that sometimes giving up seems like the easiest thing to do, but Noooooooo we gotta keep pushing. There is so much greatness waiting for us on the other side. "Great things never Coe from comfort zones" - @bizbudco Make sure you check out our #GirlBoss(es) of the Week: Danielle Coles (IG: @DColes24), a certified CPR instructor and owner of Healing Hands CPR (@HH2UCPR). All classes are $50 in July & August of 2020. Want to learn more about elections? Visit www.ISideWith.com Make sure you check out and follow @GirlBossBrunchUSA on Instagram & Facebook! Follow me on Instagram @PurpMarie_ #standupspeakupspeakout #BlackLivesMatter --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gbbtalks/message

Well, it's official: the NOVA Open Convention is canceled. Join us in this episode as we discuss our response to the cancellation. In addition, we spend a lot of time talking about the new boxed set for Warhammer 40,000 and give our thoughts on Warhammer Underworlds: Online! 2:18 - Catching Up 15:23 - NOVA Open Convention Cancellation Video: NOVA OPEN 2020 ANNOUNCEMENT 36:06 - More #New40k! What's in the Indomitus Box? Beyond the Box 1:23:51 - Hex Ed.: Warhammer Underworlds: Online Currently on Sale (until June 17, 2020) 1:45:43 - Outro Socials: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/battlemalletpodcast Twitter: https://twitter.com/battlemallet1 Instagram: https://instagram.com/battlemalletpcast Discord: https://discord.gg/U8xnpxX      

Todays show Spotlighted some Gemini Artist who recently celebrated their Birthday. Patti LABELLE, Johnny Gill, and today Lauryn Hill , The Show topic was Are Geminis two faced ? Noooooooo

NOOOOOOOO!!!!! - Happy Marriage Rules 2

Saludos querid@s ContribOYENTES: Domingo, 5 de abril....pero si no contamos nada. NADA. No le deis escucha, ni descarga ni corazoncito. Noooooooo! Que se propaga por contagio de Podcast. Dejar de escuchar Podcast. Leer libros!! Fdo: Los CALVOS ruegan encarecidamente que se aficionen a la lectura.

The podcast trap?! NOOOOOOOO! Welcome to the newest episode of NOCLIP Pocket where we’re going to be talking about Night Trap (25th Anniversary Edition). Originally a Sega CD game, the game was re-released last year spanning all the major consoles for a wider audience to experience one of the most controversial games of all time. Does it hold up? Was the game ever really “good” in a traditional sense? Well, there’s definitely something charming here, and the notoriety this game has is a hilarious backdrop with which to experience this game today. We’re going to talk about the way FMV is integrated into the mechanical experience, the way the trial and error gameplay relates to storytelling, and the characterization and nuance of cinema’s unsung hero: Weird Eddie. thanks for listening today, and keep an eye out on halloween because we’re going to HavE pLayed PokeMon black vErsion.

It's that time of year folks, when robocalls infest your phones and door knockers come by to ask you to support their candidate. The midterm elections of 2018 are here, and IWS Radio has an action packed and informative show awaiting on you. We'll be talking politics with a hilariously biting and satirical flair that only we can. So don't think of it as a boring pundit show. Noooooooo. It will be a blue or red wave of frivolity. We'll have witty electoral banter, some bad midterm election music, campaign booze, and a very special guest on with us...Ohio Gubernatorial Candidate, Renea Turner. It's going to be a landslide of laughter and information. Jay and Matt will also discuss their recent appearance on the Howard Stern show. All of that, plus Jamie Mapleleaf, and your phone calls at 661.244.9852 as IWS Radio presents: Midtermin' It With Renea Turner !!

Finally. All of our favorite heroes all in the same place for one epic movie. That's right; this week brings together some of our favorite characters together for the first time as we review Mickey, Donald, Goofy: The Three Musketeers (2004). Also, there's this superhero movie, The Avengers (2012), with a bunch of characters, and, like, I guess it kind of holds together.  Some Assembly Required. Notes: Shawarma Disney Marvel Acquisition Viserys Targaryen Iridium I like this new generation of music Chekhov's gun Noooooooo! The Moon Door Ancient Egyptian Afterlife Beliefs The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas The Three Musketeers (1993) The Man in the Iron Mask (1998) Mickey, Donald, Goofy: The Three Musketeers (graphic novel) - Note that this came out after the movie Slumdog Millionaire (2008) The Pirates of Penzance Full Metal Jacket (1987) Playlist of Source Music for Mickey, Donald, Goofy: The Three Musketeers

NOOOOOOOO!

George finds a weird list on the printer... Kim Jong Un's mansion... the millennial kicking off over losing 40,000 subscribers... the guys at Hala are back... broccoli coffee is now a thing... George has a World Cup update...Quasi from Hala isn't massively impressed... George has an amazing fact that leads to chat about a dog paying with leaves... the guy who sued his ex after he got a scholarship... Robin lied when he was dating... Chris Birks is back and Siri has even MORE attitude... a teenager got her head stuck at a festival... big props to the Indian guy from Oman going to Wimbledon... another online dating tip... how to increase the odds of your luggage coming out first on the airport baggage carousel... skills modern dads have to have... new words in the Oxford English Dictionary... new restaurant for fans of Instagram... Prince Phillip had a birthday... a woman robs a shop - but what is her excuse?!!... if you've ever had food poisoning, the culprit may be closer to home... we are getting dumber... THAT'S YOUR LOT!

BUT DON’T DESPAIR, THIS DAY WILL BE THEIR DAMNEDEST DAY Nah, nah. Nope. Nu-uh. No way. Noooooooo sirreeeee. Nup. No-ew. Nein, Not in the slightest. No thanks. Nup. Not feeling this blurb today. No. It’s a magical week boys and girls! A special week. A SILENCE! week! And Gary Lactus & The Beast Must Die are here to build a city of comics for you to all live in. Look I’m not even going to mess around – this is some seriously digressive ish. I mean…do these boys really think that this is anyway to run a podcast? Oh well – once more unto the breach… Some cursory sponsorship, some in-depth discussion of Jamie Oliver and Sunday Brunch, and a bit of Dadmin. Then The Beast ushers in another ker-lassic episode of SILENCE!…Because the Film Has Started talking about Coherence, The Autopsy of Jane Doe and Kong of Skull Island. Dragging their heels, the sadsack pair find themselves in the snowy wastes of the Anti-Reviewniverse! Then normal service resumes and they hit the Reviewniverse. ‘Discussed’ are Sooner or Later, Deadline, Jamie Hewlett, Nick Abadzis’ Dream Logic, Skidmarks by Ilya, Tundra, Tales From The Hyperverse, Hastings, Mister Miracle, 2000AD Christmas special, and somehow more. Jeez that’ll do won’t it? @silencepod @frasergeesin @thebeastmustdie @bobsymindless @kellykanayama silencepodcast@gmail.com You can support us using Patreon if you like.

Buttery mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce and stuffing shoved upside a dead turkeys butt. All of these are staples of the PERFECT thanksgiving dinner. Sometime, though, things happend and a nice holiday dedicated to being thankful turns into a scary thing..... "NO, BREAD ROLES,,, NOOOOOOOO". Here are some of the most shocking horor stories that Thanksgiving has to offer.

¿Es verdad que hay que drogar a un perro para que sea detector de drogas? NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! La respuesta es rotunda. NO! No sabemos quién se ha inventado esta tontería. Pero no. No es necesario. Es uno de los muchos mitos que queremos destruir por completo. ¿En serio piensas que un perro con síndrome de abstinencia pensaría con la suficiente claridad y tendría la suficiente energía física como para desarrollar su trabajo? Si un perro detector de droga tendría que ser adicto, ¿qué tendría que hacer un perro detector de explosivos? ¿uno de rescate de personas? ¿y uno de cáncer? Como veis, este mito no tiene ningún sentido. Así es como se entrena a un perro detector de droga: Lo que busca un perro detector. Búsqueda y rescate de persona Droga Enfermedades Setas, trufa Tabaco Dinero Explosivos Avispa asiática Ahogados que están bajo el agua Alerta médica: muy frecuente en diabéticos ... casi cualquier cosa que podamos imaginar Diferencia entre un perro detector operativo, un perro detector "doméstico" y un perro detector deportivo Consecuencias del fallo en uno y otro Exigencias para uno y para otro Construcción de un perro detector Tres Factores clave: Nivel de energía bastante alto Que le guste mucho un refuerzo frente a otros Proactivo: apto para aprender Buena combinación perro-guía Guía con conocimientos Experiencia Resolutivo Refuerzos Generalmente, objetuales: mordedor, pelota, cuerda Iniciación: Base: asociar un olor (cualquiera) a un premio Papel del clicker Pasos del proceso de asociación del olor Ubicar la asociación del olor en el entorno en el que trabajará el perro lo antes posible Esperamos haber resuelto alguna de las dudas que existen sobre este tema. Se nota que es un tema que nos gusta muchísimo, verdad? Así que, cualquier duda que tengas, estamos deseando resolverla. Recuerda que tienes a tu disposición, como oyente del podcast, el ofertón para celebrar el día de los animales. Puedes acceder a ella en la página OFERTA DÍA DE LOS ANIMALES Si quieres más información sobre todos los cursos que tienes en la Academia Mascotas Urbanas y que te pueden ayudar con este y otros problemas basta con echar un vistazo en el directorio de cursos. También te invitamos a nuestro recién estrenado canal de Youtube en el que encontrarás vídeos prácticos, sencillos y con muchas curiosidades. ¡Y hasta aquí el programa de hoy! Como siempre, muchísimas gracias por vuestras valoraciones de 5 estrellas en iTunes, por vuestros me gusta y comentarios en iVoox, y por estar ahí al otro lado, escuchando con vuestro perrete cerca, para hacerle la vida más feliz, sana y equilibrada. Nos vemos en el próximo episodio. Hasta entonces… Muy buenos días ;D

“I go in the room.” “Noooooooo!” After dealing with The Knife and putting an old foe to rest, Tarek & The Head Smashers are ready for the Underdark.  They run into some difficulties inside the Ruby of Homecoming; things happen when you have pocket dimensions […]

Noooooooo.

Chimchim, NOOOOOOOO!

¡Carqui volvió a faltar! ¡Noooooooo! Por fortuna, esta vez sí llegó lanchas y, junto con Dreivi bebé y Alexis, el podcast tocó temas tan profundos y escabrosos como la actualización del PS4, Gears 4, el Panacube, Jotum y… Pokémon Go. Dona unos pesos, que lanchas tiene hambre. http://patreon.com/batrashbatrushka ¿Quieres …

¡Carqui volvió a faltar! ¡Noooooooo! Por fortuna, esta vez sí llegó lanchas y, junto con Dreivi bebé y Alexis, el podcast tocó temas tan profundos y escabrosos como la actualización del PS4, Gears 4, el Panacube, Jotum y… Pokémon Go. Dona unos pesos, que lanchas tiene hambre. http://patreon.com/batrashbatrushka ¿Quieres darnos dinero así nada más en nuestra Saldazo OXXO? 4766 8402 7320 6396

¡Carqui volvió a faltar! ¡Noooooooo! Por fortuna, esta vez sí llegó lanchas y, junto con Dreivi bebé y Alexis, el podcast tocó temas tan profundos y escabrosos como la actualización del PS4, Gears 4, el Panacube, Jotum y… Pokémon Go. Dona unos pesos, que lanchas tiene hambre. http://patreon.com/batrashbatrushka ¿Quieres darnos dinero así nada más en nuestra Saldazo OXXO? 4766 8402 7320 6396

What's better than a new Pixar movie release date? That's right, a Pixar sequel release date......well......not really. Q & J dive into the history, heart and heartaches of the Pixar universe in this very special : And Other Stuff Too. Find out which Pixar movies are the hosts' favorites and learn how all the Pixar movies are connected into one universe (it's totally true) and how, without character growth, our show has basically become Dreamworks Animation. NOOOOOOOO! Also, #fuckgrammar and some singing may make another appearance. Don't miss this episode! It's best listened to before you take your family to see Finding Dory this weekend, or before you go watch it alone like a creep.

In this episode, they guys go in blind and discover what exactly is the indie title Awesomenauts and what does it actually do Meanwhile, Dan finishes his four for February games and Goadie delves into his PS plus library   Gaming headlines include a new peice of hardware is on the horizon from Nintendo and more delays hit some of the guys most anticipated games of this year.

Download The Journey In today's tale, we learn of Theseus: son of Poseidon, slayer of The Greek Sinister Six, and all-around psychopath, and of his arch-enemy: The Melancholy Minotaur! What are the sordid origins of the world's first and only bull-man? What system of government could possibly revolve around professional wrestling? Why can't Theseus stop killing people? Why did no one mention the giant turtle? Will the Gods ever stop descending things? And most importantly, what's that noise I hear?! Theseus, no! I'm just typing the description! NOOOOOOOO--!     All music licensed under Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International Vangelis Sound-Alike by Filmmusicgroup - Milkshake by Aaron Spencer - Pitch Black by Jens Kiilstofte - Dystopia by Per Kiilstofte - Interference by Jens Kiilstofte  - Savannah Dusk by Ridvan Düzey - Queen of the Night by Per Kiilstofte - The End of Mankind by Per Kiilstofte - Waltz of the - Undertaker by Aaron Spencer - A Day In The Sun by Per Kiilstofte - Love Making Music by Buddah Tribe Hercules vs. The Podcast Theme: Battle of Kings by Per Kiilstofte

A discussion of costumes, Mass Effect 3 developers calling themselves artist, and repeated attempt by Thomas Deja and Zach Joiner to talk football.

No episódio de hoje, Affonso Solano, Roberto Duke Estrada e Diogo Braga viram piratas em ONE PIECE!E no Vira a Página: Luffy Chapéu de Palha: o protagonista otimista Solano não aceita personagens com cara de BATATAE no Mata ou Pilota: KANEDAAAAAAAAA!! NOOOOOOOO!!!Comentado nesse episódio: Video do evento MRG e Cinema com Rapadura em SP! Coluna do Solano: O Pixel da Maldade!Curtiu ONE PIECE? Compra aqui, ó:Clique aqui para saber como foi o #MRGLIVE:FEED DO MRG: http://feeds.feedburner.com/matandorobosgigantesTWITTER DO MRG: @MRG_CURTA NOSSA PÁGINA OFICIAL NO FACEBOOK (obrigado, Rafael Arcanjo!): http://www.facebook.com/matandorobosgigantesE-MAILS:Dúvidas, xingamentos e excuse-mes para matandorobosgigantes@matandorobosgigantes.comQuem cantou a entrada desse MRG e ganhou a 1a assinatura da Panini? O ouvinte Benhur Lima, da banda Hibria! (Saiba o que ele ganhou no próximo MRG de HQs!)Ouça no PLAYER abaixo ou BAIXE A MP3 AQUI (clique com o botão direito do mouse e escolha a opção Salvar Destino Como)!

Noooooooo arrrrrrr um dos quadros mais queridos do Não Ouvinho: O VOCÊ SÓ TEM UMA CHANCE!! Cid Cidoso, Matheus Canella, Lucas Inutilismo e Magalzão vão enfrentar o fabuloso jogo com os maiores (e mais pesados) dilemas da humanidade........... SEGURA A MALHA FINA... Bancada: Cid Cidoso, Matheus Canella, Lucas Inutilismo e Magalzão Edição: Daniel Bayer