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The Church Sings to the LORD Amidst the Snarling of Enemy “Dogs”. 1. The LORD is our Shield 2. The LORD is our Shelter.Time:MorningMinister:Rev. J. VanSpronsenTexts:Psalm 59
The Deadcast concludes its dive into Robert Hunter's 1962 book, The Silver Snarling Trumpet (and its 10th season), exploring teenage Jerry Garcia's adventures with his friends Alan Trist and Brigid Meier in Palo Alto, and how this early scene gave way to the Grateful Dead.Guests: Alan Trist, Brigid Meier, Dennis McNallySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
To celebrate the Deadcast's 100th episode, we begin a 2-part special joined by the co-stars of Robert Hunter's newly-published 1962 book, the Silver Snarling Trumpet, a startling in-the-moment account of his and Jerry Garcia's formative years in Palo Alto.Guests: Alan Trist, Brigid Meier, Dennis McNallySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Rock Talk Studio: Reviewing Rock 'n' Roll Books and Documentaries
Win the new Robyn Hitchcock memoir 1967, and the new Rush book- Rush at 50, simply by signing up for the free monthly BLAST!! Shoot me an email at info@rocktalkstudio.com to enter!Today's episode looks at how the partnership between The Grateful Dead's lyricist Robert Hunter and Jerry Garcia started. This lost manuscript, written in 1961, has finally been unearthed, giving us a look at the first days of this legendary friendship. This month's SHOUT OUT goes to the Zappagram. The Zappagram is the mother of all news letters. If you want to stay on top of the music world check out the Zappagram!Support the showemail Big Rick at:info@rocktalkstudio.com
For decades, passionate fans of the Grateful Dead have speculated about the contents of a "lost manuscript"-a sort of holy grail to the origin story of a band that is practically a religion for many.Indeed, THE SILVER SNARLING TRUMPET: The Birth of the Grateful Dead-The Lost Manuscript of Robert Hunter, has been pulled from the attic after more than 50 years. It will be published with a foreword by John Mayer (Dead & Co), an introduction by Dennis McNally (renowned historian of the Dead) and an afterword by Brigid Meier (a close confidant of Jerry Garcia's and core member of the early scene described in the book).As McNally writes in the foreword: "The subculture that became known as the Grateful Dead began as a cluster of relationships long before there as a band; Trumpet is the story of that earliest community."Essential reading for Dead Heads and anyone with an interest in early 60s counterculture, THE SILVER SNARLING TRUMPET is as Mayer puts it in the foreword, "a lost box of film that, when developed, reveals some of the most striking images you've ever seen, the kind that make you go slack jawed and your heart race." In these pages, readers are privy to the early days of Hunter, Jerry Garcia, and their cohorts, who sit at the coffee shop passing around a single cup of bottomless coffee because they lacked the funds for more than one. "We created our own culture simply by being friends and allowing that circle of friendship to expand organically," writes Hunter's friend Brigid Meier in a heartfelt Afterword. "If you thought you were one of us, you were welcome to join in."With the publication of this long awaited manuscript, we get to follow Hunter, Jerry Garcia, and the rest of the band into the stacks at Kepler's Books, to rent instruments at Swain's House of Music, and through the countryside on road trips. We witness impromptu jams, inspired intellectual pranks, and a dialogue that is, by turns, amusing and brilliant and outrageous. Hunter shares his impressions of his first gig with Garcia for a college audience, along with descriptions of his most intense dreams and psychedelic explorations. All of it is enlivened by Hunter's visionary spirit and profound ideas about creativity and collaboration.This is an exciting season for fans of the Dead: Robert Hunter's career-spanning archival series recently launched through Rhino; Dead & Co. just finished an engagement at The Sphere, and the band will be honored at the Kennedy Center Honors in December.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/arroe-collins-unplugged-totally-uncut--994165/support.
For decades, passionate fans of the Grateful Dead have speculated about the contents of a "lost manuscript"-a sort of holy grail to the origin story of a band that is practically a religion for many.Indeed, THE SILVER SNARLING TRUMPET: The Birth of the Grateful Dead-The Lost Manuscript of Robert Hunter, has been pulled from the attic after more than 50 years. It will be published with a foreword by John Mayer (Dead & Co), an introduction by Dennis McNally (renowned historian of the Dead) and an afterword by Brigid Meier (a close confidant of Jerry Garcia's and core member of the early scene described in the book).As McNally writes in the foreword: "The subculture that became known as the Grateful Dead began as a cluster of relationships long before there as a band; Trumpet is the story of that earliest community."Essential reading for Dead Heads and anyone with an interest in early 60s counterculture, THE SILVER SNARLING TRUMPET is as Mayer puts it in the foreword, "a lost box of film that, when developed, reveals some of the most striking images you've ever seen, the kind that make you go slack jawed and your heart race." In these pages, readers are privy to the early days of Hunter, Jerry Garcia, and their cohorts, who sit at the coffee shop passing around a single cup of bottomless coffee because they lacked the funds for more than one. "We created our own culture simply by being friends and allowing that circle of friendship to expand organically," writes Hunter's friend Brigid Meier in a heartfelt Afterword. "If you thought you were one of us, you were welcome to join in."With the publication of this long awaited manuscript, we get to follow Hunter, Jerry Garcia, and the rest of the band into the stacks at Kepler's Books, to rent instruments at Swain's House of Music, and through the countryside on road trips. We witness impromptu jams, inspired intellectual pranks, and a dialogue that is, by turns, amusing and brilliant and outrageous. Hunter shares his impressions of his first gig with Garcia for a college audience, along with descriptions of his most intense dreams and psychedelic explorations. All of it is enlivened by Hunter's visionary spirit and profound ideas about creativity and collaboration.This is an exciting season for fans of the Dead: Robert Hunter's career-spanning archival series recently launched through Rhino; Dead & Co. just finished an engagement at The Sphere, and the band will be honored at the Kennedy Center Honors in December.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/arroe-collins-like-it-s-live--4113802/support.
Today's Mystery: Mr. Chameleon is called in when a doctor suspects that a man who died of lockjaw was actually murdered.Original Radio Broadcast Date: September 7, 1949Originating from New York CityStarring: Karl Swenson as Mister Chameleon; Frank Butler as Sergeant Dave ArnoldSupport the show monthly at https://patreon.greatdetectives.netPatreon Supporter of the Day: Diane, Patreon Supporter since July 2022Support the show on a one-time basis at http://support.greatdetectives.net.Mail a donation to: Adam Graham, PO Box 15913, Boise, Idaho 83715Take the listener survey at http://survey.greatdetectives.netGive us a call at 208-991-4783Follow us on Instagram at http://instagram.com/greatdetectivesFollow us on Twitter @radiodetectivesJoin us again tomorrow for another detective drama from the Golden Age of Radio.
Today's Mystery: Mr. Chameleon is called in when a doctor suspects that a man who died of lockjaw was actually murdered.Original Radio Broadcast Date: September 7, 1949Originating from New York CityStarring: Karl Swenson as Mister Chameleon; Frank Butler as Sergeant Dave ArnoldSupport the show monthly at https://patreon.greatdetectives.netPatreon Supporter of the Day: Diane, Patreon Supporter since July 2022Support the show on a one-time basis at http://support.greatdetectives.net.Mail a donation to: Adam Graham, PO Box 15913, Boise, Idaho 83715Take the listener survey at http://survey.greatdetectives.netGive us a call at 208-991-4783Follow us on Instagram at http://instagram.com/greatdetectivesFollow us on Twitter @radiodetectives
This week in the pod, the gang is up to their neck in the fantastic effort by Gord and the Sadies. You're gonna want to check this one out!Transcript: Track 1:[0:00] Hey, it's Craig here, and I just wanted to let you know that Christmastime in.Track 1:[0:03] Toronto is coming early this year. Join me and the Discovering Downey crew for the recording of our podcast finale, live at The Rec Room in downtown Toronto on Friday, July 19th. Long Slice Brewing presents A Celebration of Gord Downey, which will include a special in-person interview with Gord's brother, Patrick Downey. Spend the evening listening to your favorite hip tunes provided by the almost hip and help us raise money for the gourd downy fund for brain cancer research with a silent auction featuring incredible items up for grabs visit discoveringdowny.com for tickets or for more information about the event, let's have a toast for charity wickedness and most importantly hope.Track 2:[1:04] DOS Beauty I name my guitar My Beautiful Behor Everybody's coughing here And music's infiltrating work In the most pleasant way It's a system based on silverware Listening's an extrasensory Perception And talking the only psychic thing and I can dress you in my thoughts until you wear them. I've been taking care of my clothes like they're cattle. Try this shirt. It would look so good on you.Track 1:[1:42] Welcome, music lovers. Long Slice Brewery presents Discovering Downy. Hey, it's J.D.Track 2:[1:52] Here, and welcome to Discovering Downey, an 11-part project with a focus on the music and poetry of Mr. Gord Downey. The late frontman of the Tragically Hip gave to the world an extensive solo discography on top of the hip's vocal acrobatics that awed us for years. So far, he's released eight records in total, three of them posthumously. Now listen, you might be the biggest fan of The Hip out there, but have you heard these records? Because I'm an inquisitive podcaster, I enlisted my friends Craig, Justin, and Kirk, giant fans in their own right, to discover Downey with me, JD, as their host. Every week we'll get together and listen to one of Gord's records. We're starting with Coke Machine Glow and working from there in chronological order. We discuss and dissect the album, the production, the lyrics, and we break it down song by song. This week we're going to be talking about Gord's fourth record, and his first and only with the Sadies.Track 3:[2:58] Occurring son kirk from chino how the fuck are things with you buddy jd.Track 6:[3:04] I'm uh i'm back home after a little bit of travel it's been good travel um it's allowed me to really kind of soak this album in so i'm excited talking about it with you boys.Track 3:[3:15] Can you confirm this craig i'm kidding yeah how's it going pretty.Track 4:[3:20] Good yeah also looking forward to talking about this album them and it this one took me a little bit of time to get into but we'll talk about that i have been a little under the weather since the last recording it was about halfway through the last podcast i started feeling something coming on and just won't go away just a cold thankfully but yeah other than that things are well.Track 3:[3:41] Well that's good justin you've been a podcasting machine today are you spent or are you ready to talk shop with me i'm.Track 5:[3:49] Just getting started buddy.Track 3:[3:50] Yeah well let's get into it then and the conquering sun is the album we are discussing this week after three consecutive solo outings with some form of the country of miracles gourd wrote and produced this one with the sadies who had just come from supporting the hip on their world container tour Like so many, this marriage was consummated by the CBC, when the Sadies chose Mr. Downey to collaborate with, as was the program's premise. The Sadies are a Toronto-based and road-tested throughout Canada and beyond, with an original lineup consisting of Travis Goode, Sean Dean, Mike Belotiski, and Dallas Goode, who sadly passed away in 2022. This band, as I mentioned, is road-tested with buckets of swagger and chops for days. But how do you talk about The Conquering Sun? After the loose and improvised feeling of the last three records, this record is tight and economical. With a 30-minute runtime, I had to listen twice to get my walk in.Track 3:[4:55] Of the four records we've listened to so far, this one makes my Olympic podium for rock and roll with a hard-fought bronze medal, which is nothing to shake a stick at unless, of course, you're shaking the stick in a complimentary fashion. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this album. In fact, in my opinion, this record is the closest we get to a sound that is reminiscent of the hip, up and down on this record. The songs are screaming for radio play if only radio had been a factor upon its release in 2014. From the rip of Crater right through Saved, there isn't a missed opportunity on this record. I could go on about how much I like this record, na-na-na-na, blah-blah-blah, etc. You might be curious how I'm literally singing this album's praises, yet I've only ranked it third of four. I promise I'm not damning with faint praise. It's more that I loved the ceiling of the country of miracles, particles and the idea that we don't get a fourth effort from that entity bums me out a little bit so it's hard to go into this one with that ripple of bummed outness influencing me a little more than frankly i'd like but who cares what i think let's check in with the crew craig we'll start with you this week.Track 4:[6:04] Yeah this album like i i mentioned took took a few listens to get into um it's definitely not in you know it's not my favorite of the four we've heard so far but it's really just it's drastically different it just has a different vibe and there are a lot of things I really like about it and I think that my biggest realization is this this is a summer album this is a a nice weather taking a drive in the car putting the windows down this it's that kind of album and for the first couple weeks I didn't have that weather but but just past in the past few days we have and it's just it totally changed my outlook of this this album.Track 3:[6:45] I was on mute. Justin, what are your thoughts overall?Track 5:[6:49] Oh, I needed this one. I needed this album to get my headspace back into this. And I think I'm going to rank this number two so far out of the four. I actually really love this album a lot. And like Craig, it took me a minute to get into it, but something clicked and I have been listening to it at least two or three times a day every day since. And in the car, on my phone, with or without earbuds trying to get the different parts of the sound, and it kicks my ass every time. I really just like this album from start to finish. Every song kind of sounds the same, which makes it sound like one big long song, and I really kind of love that.Track 3:[7:28] Interesting. I can't wait till we break it down. What say you, Kirk from Chino?Track 6:[7:32] Like my brethren here, it took me a while. In fact, it took me a while because it almost felt like a divorce and maybe a bit of an affair Was going on with with our buddy Gord. I was so I.Track 6:[7:48] Immersed into what was happening with the country miracles and like you said in the beginning like the ceiling like i wanted more and i was so ready for more i had the vinyl of this one the last ground bounce i didn't and i listened to it and i knew there was something there but i was angry honestly i was angry because i wanted more as we had mentioned but man did it grow and grow row. I'm not going to rank it right now because every time I rank something, a day or two goes by and something happens. And I realized, oh man, that was, you know, the grand bounce. That was Coke machine glow that, and you know, every album that we've had a chance to listen to has been, I think in every slot, if that makes sense, depending on the time of day or what's going on. And and so again it just brings you back to joy because i didn't dive in when it was happening which of course i'm a little sad about but i'm so excited now that i'm like i'm really loving music discovery again i'm really loving listening to albums i'm really loving i don't care if it's in the car if i'm walking the dog if i'm sitting at work if i'm you know working on something on on the computer and I've got the music going.Track 6:[9:11] Like I have not spent this much time with new music. I say that in quotes because it's obviously not new, but it's new to me, new to us.Track 6:[9:23] And I'm just, I'm loving the ride. That's all I got to say. This one is the last two, I mean, like I'm going to be listening to these forever. And I'm going to try and preach the word and get some people to jump on board because it makes me sad when I look at Spotify or something and I see the honestly and don't jump on me. It's like the limited number of listens to the Gord stuff. I have friends that have put stuff out that have more downloads than that. I'm not saying that in a negative, I'm saying that in a like, that shouldn't be. That shouldn't be, so. Right. My diatribe's over, sorry.Track 3:[10:03] No, no. Well, that's why I was mentioning off the top too too, that it screams for radio play to me. It's very radio-friendly. There's nothing over four minutes. And fucking radio just didn't matter in 2014. So of course we were never going to hear this. Unless we were paying very close attention.Track 6:[10:26] Absolutely.Track 3:[10:27] Clearly we were not.Track 6:[10:28] Absolutely. Radio.Track 5:[10:29] Radio still matters to me. I'm a radio guy. I'm going to tell you that right now. Yeah. Love radio.Track 3:[10:34] Radio doesn't love you back though. That's the problem. Like it's getting stripped down and worn down and these formats, you know, like if you've got a, if you've got a local that you love, then by going to stand with it, right?Track 5:[10:47] Yeah, you're right. We have, we have a, I'm going to sidebar here for just a second. We have a great station here in Southern Vermont, WEQX, which is one of the last great independent alternative rock stations in North America. And they discovered No Rain by Blind Melon. They were the first one to play it. And they just got this great pedigree, and they love to play Gord's solo stuff. From 2020 on, there's been a lot of new Gord solo stuff that's really been great.Track 3:[11:19] Get up. Right.Track 5:[11:20] And it's kind of been hard to not listen ahead during this project. Wow. I don't know if they played any of the stuff from this album, but this would totally fit.Track 4:[11:28] Yeah, we once had a really awesome independent radio station down in Bellingham, Washington, which we could pick up in Vancouver. And they actually, their tagline was something like, we don't play Canadian music because we have to. We play it because it rocks or something along those lines. And they would play The Hip and Rush. and yeah that's the only american station i've heard that that played a ton of the hip and yeah of course about 15 years ago they got whatever bought out by chorus or someone and it's now just yeah yeah your standard rock radio well.Track 3:[12:02] Should we eradicate this problem and educate people on this record go through it track by track are we ready let's.Track 5:[12:10] Go sure yeah.Track 3:[12:12] All right we start with track one side a it's the classic rock tinged crater what did you think of this one mr greg.Track 4:[12:25] My dad uh came to vancouver from new zealand in 1965 to to buy a 65 chevy impala and this song crater is a 1965 chevy impala cruising down the road it's just a great rock and roll track yeah um man that snare drum is yes snare snare yeah it is it is there in the mix yeah definitely i didn't dive into the lyrics at all especially um the songs that were more kind of rocking i i just i was just enjoying them and the only thought i had lyric wise was um almost like an idea of like either you're you're the crater or you're the meter meteor And I was kind of thinking along the lines of there's that not so great Dire Straits song, Heavy Fuel, where he says, you know, sometimes you're the windshield and sometimes you're the bug. And that was kind of the... What i got out of the lyrics on this song.Track 6:[13:25] I i wonder in the lyrics and maybe you guys did further research that i didn't see like how much of it was gord how much of it was the gents from the sadies because i i knew the name the sadies but i honestly until this i had not really you know dove into some of their music and i think in one of our you know communications justin had mentioned that as well like he's doing a lot of listening to the sadies and and i try i you know my listening at first it's this is it's going to sound weird um i did a lot of listening at first obviously like through spotify or whatever else but it wasn't until youtube and i got to see these guys and they're wearing like their nudie suits is what it looks like you know and i just i just saw a bunch of them they had a big exhibit at the you know country music uh hall of fame and they were We're talking about that LA country and, you know, very much a country tinge, but, you know, they're using those hollow body guitars. And anyway, so back to lyrics, like what's the balance between Gord and the Sadie's? Did anyone find anything on that?Track 4:[14:30] My understanding is that they, that the Sadie's wrote the songs and Gord wrote the lyrics that, yeah. And it was recorded apparently over a number of years. This wasn't like an album that was done in one session, which I find surprising because like someone said earlier, it's, it sounds just like a, it's a great album. It, it really sounds like it was just tracked in one day or something. It's yeah, there's a.Track 6:[14:53] There's YouTube has a, uh, interview of, I think the Sadie's had just put an album out. It was like 2010 and Gord was with them and they, you know, obviously had some discussions about their, their time together. And in some of the research it talks about, this has definitely been a long-term type of thing. Great song.Track 5:[15:10] Yeah, there was a CBC fuse in 2007 is what put them together. So it took seven years for this album to come out from that first collaboration. Collaboration I really like the sound.Track 6:[15:21] From a musicianship standpoint ethereal is really the kind of the adjective that came to mind on a lot of the the guitar parts that the Sadie's had you know very much a hollow body type guitar going through either a Fender a lot of reverb I really liked that driving sound I really really liked it it was it was pretty prevalent throughout in my opinion anything.Track 3:[15:43] Else on crater i.Track 5:[15:46] Just yeah i mean this is gourd this is like this is a live show on a record um this one song particularly and he is giving it all he has what at the end of the second verse and if we record any of these songs this is the one i'm doing because this is a this is a screamer and it's so much fun to be it you know we don't want to we don't want to do it we want to be it this song is fun to sing, Yeah. So I also, I downloaded an app because I noticed my foot was tapping a lot faster at the end of the song than the beginning. And I, so I, I downloaded an app and it picks up 13 beats per minute from the start to the finish.Track 4:[16:29] Oh yeah. That's something I'm going to be talking about later. Cause I, it was driving me nuts. One of the songs I was trying to actually figure out what was happening mathematically and yeah. Okay. I'm glad I'm not the only one noticed.Track 6:[16:43] I love that. I love the time changes in a variety of different songs. I put them down in a few notes. But the one thing I really want to say before we dive into any more, long live the guitar solo. And there's quite a few guitar solos on this album, specifically Crater. And they're just, they're solos. They're good solos. And on the other albums, we'll call lead lines, but there's not a lot of solos. And I'm digging that, getting that back, because we haven't had that in the first three.Track 5:[17:15] Oh, yes.Track 3:[17:16] Nice. Well, the next one is sort of the titular track, but not quite. The Conquering Sun does what for you, Justin?Track 5:[17:27] When I look out the window and see Audette's Blue Spruce Farm across the street, That's kind of what I think about. I mean, it's getting on time to plant. And here it is as we record this. It's planting season and working the fugitive dust. Nature, please be good to us. You know, we just had this massively wet spring that wiped out a shit ton of the farms around here. That's, you know, before they even got started. For me, that's part of what this song is. There's also the line, she is more than a conqueror. And I wonder if that's a reference to Gord's wife, Laura, with her recent cancer battle. I don't know when this song was recorded in the timeline of all that, like what year this happened. But I interpreted it as possibly something that could be a reference to defeating the cancer. And the other thing that I really, it was a callback to We Are The Same is when Gord's, his vocal run during hearing, ooh, day is your word, night is the glue. He does that exact same thing in The Depression Suite. That very same run, the change, the pitch, the length, I love it.Track 4:[18:41] Yeah, I caught that too. That's great.Track 6:[18:43] Great song. It was one of those. I think I mentioned on the last time we spoke, there was not a definitive MVP for me. This one has fallen in and out of MVP, and it may fall back in at the end of this recording. morning. But that's one of the things that really showed me this was a great album, but specifically this song. I just felt immersed in it. And like I said earlier, Ethereal, again, another great solo, another great, that sound that the Sadies have. They have, these guys, what are they like six, five, six, six, they look like trees and they might be a buck or five soaking wet and the suits are barely hanging on them and he's just playing this you know telecaster like it's a little tiny you know a small ukulele and they just have this they they just have this presence and like i said it really wasn't until i i started seeing them that i i got the sadie's because when i was listening it didn't hit me as much and i was kind of hoping i don't know if i mentioned this earlier because they were on the world container tour and i was wondering if they were the opening band I didn't find anything that showed them specifically, but when I watch the videos, it doesn't bring a memory or recollection that I saw. I think it was Sam Roberts that opened for a lot of the shows that I saw here in California.Track 5:[20:06] I saw Joel Plaskett as the opener on that tour.Track 6:[20:11] Got it. Got it. Yeah. So I was kind of hoping that they were one of the openers. But you know now i'm really excited that you know just in the last couple of days i would say is really when my attention has gone towards them and when you start hearing and seeing how they crafted these songs together and how they worked so well with gourd and his phrasing and and so yeah love this love this yeah.Track 4:[20:38] The the sadies are actually on tour as we record this and i'm hoping to pick to go down to the the vancouver show uh so you might you might want to look at dates they They might be coming down your way.Track 6:[20:48] I hope so.Track 4:[20:48] Yeah, this song, to me, as soon as I heard it, it reminded me of Nico Case. And Nico Case is someone who's worked with the Sadies. And so it is very much that sort of alt-country vibe on this song. And this was probably the song that drew me in right away. Again, like Kirk said, it was in the contention for my MVP track for sure, which, like you, keeps changing. and yeah it's just just a great feel to this song.Track 3:[21:18] Yeah i couldn't agree more i think we're two for two so far on this record and we're gonna find out that let's go pretty even record it's a pretty even fucking record los angeles times has the aforementioned swagger dripping from it, Kirk, did you like this one as much as I did?Track 6:[25:07] I'm going to say yes, absolutely. But it didn't start out that way. This actually was one of my least favorite tunes after the first couple of passes. I just didn't quite get it. It was just kind of like, it was almost too much swagger at first for me. Because remember, I think we're in a divorce right now. I think this is an affair that's going on. So I'm a little adverse to the song and the album and almost everything because I still have his last, you know, that last record that just moved us all. It was still here. So there was this almost a betrayal, swagger, distaste that I had in the beginning. But listening to it, re-listening to it, listening to it in headphones, listening to it on vinyl, listening to it in the car, listening to it in the plane, listening to it in the hotel. The key changes, like we'd mentioned earlier, just another great solo, just great rock. And, hey, I'm an LA guy. So this one definitely turned and has also filtered through multiple times sometimes on the mvp track side so yeah to me it's three for three and i'm just gonna pre-call it for y'all.Track 4:[26:22] Yeah yeah i found this song to be um i was the same way i found the the progression to be a bit generic at first and so i didn't really love it right away but yeah it really grew and i think what makes it work is that this band is just so tight they're so i mean loose but Yeah, the tempo, you know, picks up and, you know, there's the push and push and pull, but they are such a great band that they can pull off anything. Just a simple strumming pattern and make it sound pro. And there's that thing you mentioned off the top, JD, the blah, blah, blah, et cetera, which I was wondering if, I'm sure you guys were thinking the music at work, live, Gord would do the et cetera thing. Did you find anything lyrically, Justin?Track 5:[27:10] Yeah. So there's a dedication at the end of the lyrics for Walter Van Tilburg Clark, who wrote The Oxbow Incident, among many other works. And that became kind of one of the great Western movies of all time. And it's about, the subject is these cowboys thought that one of their buddies got murdered and that somebody stole their cows. And then they found this group of three people that they thought did it and they hanged them. And then they found out that the guy survived and it wasn't them and you know it was just a big mess so it was it was the oxbow incident and uh yeah so it was a complicated story and but this isn't about the story it's about the author there are a lot of references to lines in the book or the movie but it's you know there's a line he was born and raised and moved away and that's about i think walter van tillberg clark who was born in maine but then his parents moved him to nevada and then he moved to in New York and then he went he was kind of all over the place beyond that I don't know it's, There's one thing that is a bit of a departure, I think, on this album is that the lyrics aren't too deep. There's not a lot of mystery in this album with Gord's lyrics. And I was hoping for more of that, but the research was a little easier than I wanted it to be on this.Track 4:[28:26] That was something I noticed too, is like there didn't seem to be as much to dig into.Track 4:[28:31] And once I kind of got past that and just started enjoying it, I really did grow to appreciate the album a lot more. It's funny that you mentioned the Oxbow incident because number one, a couple of weeks ago i was in la and we did did a couple studio tours and this is one of the movies they actually mentioned i forget if it was warner brothers or universal but it was shot at one of those two places in the next song so one good fast job one of my notes here is oxbow incident because of the line it says art shot said wellman to fonda so wellman the director and uh fonda the the star of the show so um nice kind of a neat little tie and i had no idea that the previous song had that reference so i'm glad you caught that this song i really love and this was the one i was um i found really interesting the the progression you've got like almost like a eight bar blues but then they throw in an extra bar so it's like this nine bar which just throws you off off balance a little bit once you once you hear it a few times it makes perfect sense but there's the lyric about drop you know planes dropping paper and dropping scissors and the chimps becoming regular wizards i think it is. And so that made me think of, there's a couple of Simpsons episode that reference like the infinite monkey theorem.Track 4:[29:46] What is it? Infinite monkeys, or give a monkey a typewriter and let it type for infinity. It would create, you know, Shakespeare. And you know, it would just some ridiculous theory that has, you know, been, you know, criticized heavily, but I wonder if there's something to that.Track 6:[30:03] Sorely discredited.Track 4:[30:05] And I really like, there's the line too about something about forget the commas. This is one good fast job. And it almost made me think of this album that they just like banged off this out. Like, let's not, let's just have fun. Let's just write some songs and let's not take ourselves too seriously. So those are my thoughts.Track 5:[30:23] Well, I think there was some controversy over the name of the band. And there are commas in that band name. And I think that they're just saying, you know, screw it. And like, nobody asked for this. We're just doing it. let us enjoy it. I did see a couple of interviews where Gord and members of the band were like, can we not dissect this? This is just rock and roll.Track 4:[30:44] Yeah.Track 6:[30:46] One thing in watching some of those videos that I had mentioned, the last two songs that we discussed that they had played, it was a Greenbelt Harvest Festival thing show that was on. They had almost every song on there and he was playing with the Sadie's and watching the crowd to me was actually quite entertaining because they just sat there and looked in bewilderment right because I don't know they obviously have probably some relationship with with the hip and who knows if they're early hit people or later hit people or die hard all the way but when Gord does the solo stuff and then if they're not familiar with the Sadie's they just sat there and looked like yeah why don't what are we experiencing here what what's what's going on and bewilderment was the note note that i wrote right.Track 3:[31:34] Right i mean this makes no sense to me fuck okay sorry uh continue.Track 6:[31:42] It man one good fast job and almost back to kind of those punk type roots and that driving rocking it it's uh who i jd like this album has everything and, Also, one thing I wanted to mention, I know we're not through it all, but I think they did a great job of tracking. I really felt good about where all the songs were. I needed Crater to get me going, even though I was still mad and angry, like we mentioned, and then Saved at the end that we'll talk about. It just was like, okay, I got a good, nice, warm hug. Thank you. you um which.Track 5:[32:26] You know what's amazing is there were so many reviews about this album that said it was not cohesive and inconsistent and like what the hell are you talking about and.Track 3:[32:36] Uneven and blah blah.Track 4:[32:37] Blah yeah what.Track 3:[32:38] The hell man agree.Track 4:[32:39] Yeah no that's a reviewer who read that it was you know recorded over many years yeah that's ridiculous like maybe if you gave it one or two listens but even then even the first listen i didn't love it but it sounded like an album yeah Yeah. One more thing about this song though, before, before we move on, I love the middle section. There's like a bridge or maybe even call it a chorus. It only goes to it once the, I had to look, I had to go, I had to laugh. And it's really interesting how they go through it once, then there's that extra bar, like they keep doing, and then they change the chord progression and back off a bit. Like if you listen to the way the, you know, they're the same instruments, but they just back off and the feel changes totally. And it's such a great effect. Rather than ramping up a bridge, they almost like pull back a bit. And that really was unique. And it only happens once. It feels like a chorus to me, but it's right smack dab in the middle of the song. And I think it's two minutes and like 23 seconds or something. And this is definitely one of my favorites.Track 3:[33:43] Yeah, it's a good one. And the next one is a good one as well. It's got to hold the record for the longest title in Gord's solo oeuvre. Kirk mentioned a moment ago that there's a bit of everything on this record. And to me, the beginning of this song, just the very beginning, is shoegazy.Track 5:[34:00] Yes.Track 3:[34:00] Or it goes into a real punk sort of vibe. And it didn't start to break my heart until this afternoon. Justin, what have you got for us?Track 5:[34:09] So the line, we fought like two Irons, really stuck out to me. and it goes with Kirk. I don't know that this was the middle of a divorce. I think Gord is just polyamorous at this point because this project took seven years and in the middle of it, he released the third album, Grand Bounce. So he is just sleeping around. I love the punk, the hard driving, just we're going to beat the fuck out of this song.Track 4:[34:38] My first real positive experience with this song was driving to my show last weekend and it was like i said a nice day i was driving along and to me like i said it's a real good driving album and i was coming up to this i guess it was a school zone but it was a weekend so there's no school and there was a uh a flashing like speed limit sign it was like a happy face and as i'm driving by it's like it turns to a sad face because i guess i was a little bit above the limit i'm not a huge speeder but i found that kind of quite funny especially after the i just just listen to the line what is it um something about driving fast oh yeah drive drive it like we stole it yeah it's a great great line that's right and then later on there's the dishwasher loaded which i love because i i wish i could say that most of my music listening was in the car but i only have about a five minute commute to work so most of my listening is actually doing the dishes and so this is just a great song when you're doing the dishes and and dishwasher loaded it and it really really kind of got you know i.Track 5:[35:40] Had the same experience man that's.Track 4:[35:41] Found it pretty funny and i actually the first time i noticed that lyric i was actually had just put this open i was closing the door of the dishwasher and so it was just it was just perfect it's so funny yeah.Track 5:[35:51] That's amazing oh.Track 4:[35:53] And great harmonies too on the chorus like love those harmonies yeah.Track 6:[35:57] That's one thing you'll notice too when you watch those or or you see them like the the harmony part especially especially after what we had just experienced for the last three albums, you know, with the female voice going back to a male voice backing. I love that element that it brought to it. And I'm just gonna jump into the next song, Budget Shoes. This is one that I think has probably held the number one spot for me. I would say it's not necessarily still there, but it's been there more often than not. And maybe I'm far off on this, but being the American, one of the two Americans that really likes Canadian culture, it brought me back to Kids in the Hall for some reason. In fact, so much so, if you think of the Kids in the Hall intro, I actually looked it up to go hoping it was the sadies like that really would have made my day if it was the sadies that had done that song that's the intro to kids in the hall.Track 4:[39:34] There is there is a connection there and i hope i'm correct here but i believe i read that the dallas good the the younger brother who you know passed away recently who.Track 3:[39:44] Was the drummer.Track 4:[39:44] He he played so so the good family was a was a country family like they had like a family band and and the older brother travis actually played with his band and Dallas being younger he he went more towards punk and I believe it said that his first or one of his first bands was with one of the members of uh Shadowy Men is that the name of the band that does the theme yeah yeah.Track 3:[40:11] Shadowy Men oh.Track 6:[40:12] Wow nice it definitely was reminiscent of that uh the entire song to me is just brilliant and it it gives you I mean it It really just digs deep inside my soul going back to the ethereal. When Gord hits those moments of the desperation vocal that we heard a lot, not only in recording, but live when he was with the hip, that brought such a comfort to me, right? Knowing where the hip is at, knowing where Gord is at, knowing what's coming. Like this is three years prior to his passing. And just so thankful that we get another version of Gord. And that's really what it was to me is we got, we have the hip and we love that. We have these first three albums, but now we have another one. And it was, Justin, you mentioned it in his lyrics. It's like, I'm not trying to confuse anyone here. I got this great band. They've given me this good music and I'm just gonna give it, I'm gonna give it what's coming to me at the moment. so when he does his and i call it a desperation vocal i know exactly what.Track 5:[41:22] You mean when you say it though.Track 3:[41:26] Yeah.Track 5:[41:26] Yep. Yep. So I'm going to ask the Canadians in the room here about budget shoes because I did some research on this as well. And apparently there's a tradition in Canada that finance ministers buy a new pair of shoes before presenting the budget and they wear them on the floor. Or if they're pissed off about it, they don't.Track 4:[41:48] Oh, wow.Track 5:[41:48] And it's this thing that has happened since the 1860s.Track 3:[41:53] Jesus. Do they go bare feet? I mean, listen, I was a political science major, and I've never heard of it before, but that doesn't really mean anything.Track 6:[42:01] As the other American, I agree with what you say full-heartedly. Love it. Love that connection.Track 3:[42:10] Yeah, I think it's great.Track 5:[42:11] It was strange, but interesting. And I don't know if this song is a commentary on politics and that, or if it just works well with... I mean, this song sounds like, you know, we're sleeping in a tent in a winter storm unexpectedly in the middle of the desert, you know, and I've got nice shoes and you don't, you know, and I'm going to keep my feet and you're going to lose them to frostbite. I don't know.Track 4:[42:37] What I was thinking was I was imagining almost like an old Western movie. It's like sweltering hot in the desert. And yeah, they're camping overnight. Night and you know the most iconic thing you'll see in a western is that you know the shot of the cowboy boots and the pan up and and i'm just picturing this you know guy sleeping in his budget you know there's cheap shoes and that's kind of what i do balances on yeah yeah.Track 6:[43:04] Ouch shots fired they're.Track 5:[43:05] A great company and they.Track 6:[43:06] Make a fine shoe thank you we're not sponsored by any of these particular shoe brands yeah i mean budget shoes you talk about the westerns it's almost like a spaghetti western type feel just in that uh the guitar riff as well so.Track 3:[43:26] Oh, that's cool. I felt that, too. I wouldn't have put that together. All right, let's move on. Demand Destruction. Is it just me, Justin, or does this song feel very much like the Tragically Hip? Am I crazy?Track 5:[43:38] No, I don't think you're crazy about that at all. And this song is, I think, Gord kind of putting out his own views. Again, there's a notation at the bottom. The last one, Budget Shoes, was dedicated to Evan S. Connell, who was the author of the book about Custer where the title of The Grand Bounce came from. So that's a continuation. And then this one is dedicated to Dr. Helen Caldicott, who was an Australian physicist and anti-nuclear war advocate. And it just feels like a protest song to me. I really don't have a lot of notes about it. It's just a nice, fun tune. But there's definitely a message in there. And I think it's Gord speaking about, let's not fuck this up. and maybe some reverence for Dr. Caldecott. It says, I'm not a fan, I just like what you do. I don't know. I don't have a whole lot to unpack on this one.Track 3:[44:30] Right. Well, no, I think you unpacked quite a bit. Craig, what have you got for us?Track 4:[44:36] One thing I'll say about this song is I found maybe the snare was a little too biting for me. I found that if you if you were listening quietly it it just jumped right out of the mix to the point where you almost couldn't hear anything else and when you turned it up it just had just a little a tinge too much oh yeah you guys know who who mixed the album yeah so bob rock and i think he did a great job overall but it definitely you know he's known for those big huge drums and i just would have liked a little more balance i thought the snare was just a little peeking out a little bit too much the rest of the album i think it it works but maybe the song is the poppiest.Track 5:[45:17] I think of the of the songs on the album it's certainly.Track 4:[45:20] Radio friendly fairly typical like blues rock sort of yeah um riff at the start yeah.Track 3:[45:25] That's what reminds me it reminds me of something off of road apples you know oh yeah yeah that era.Track 4:[45:31] Yeah great great harmonies again especially in the chorus all.Track 3:[45:34] Right from there we get a change of pace with mandolin and organ off the top of devil enough. Am I right? Was it mandolin Craig?Track 4:[45:44] Um, yeah, I believe so. I need to go back and listen again. Um, yeah, this is the song I referenced earlier that was driving me nuts. Even today I was sitting there tapping my toes, like trying to figure out the time change. And I actually had this like theory about what they were doing with it, you know, how they're getting from one tempo to the next. And then I just realized after a while it's just feel it's all feel. And I won't even get into it, because there are some weird things that happen. And I think it is what Justin mentioned earlier, I think it's just that flexibility of, of like, you know, they're really pushing the tempo, bringing it back quite frequently. And so.Track 4:[46:25] Yeah, if anyone wants to transcribe this drum part for me and send it to me, I would love to see that because I would love to know mathematically how it works, but I'm pretty sure it is just like a feel thing. This was a song that really stuck out to me. I love that time change. Having said all that, it really, the first few times just really struck me. The guitar playing at the end, the sort of Nashville picking at the end is just amazing. There's a few songs that have those great guitar solos. I think often it's Travis, according to the videos I watched, although I believe Dallas will trade off solo sometimes too. There's the line, Streets Ahead, which of course is a song name from Now For Plan A. And I had just actually recently been watching Community. And I'm not sure if you guys know that reference, but there's a, you know, it's like a catchphrase of Chevy Chase's character. And I actually found a, I wondered if it was related and I found an interview where someone asked Gord that question and he's just like, what? He was so like, no, like what are you talking about? Which of course makes sense. I mean, you don't write books. All these songs you're not a prolific writer like gourd if you're if you're.Track 6:[47:36] Spending countless hours.Track 4:[47:39] Binging you know sitcoms with 120 episodes.Track 5:[47:44] Well and gourd gourd's a dan akroyd guy not a chevy chase guy.Track 6:[47:48] Yeah true hey going back to that the ending part craig yes uh you know they almost have a bluegrass feel in some of these instrumental type solos there's There's rock going on against a different instrumentation, which I absolutely love the devil enough to me almost was reminiscent of like your seventies kind of, you know, Barracuda and like the big songs that would have a slow intro and then rock out or go to another slow, but very seventies rock and kind of anthemic type of we're going to switch keys. We're going to switch tempos i very much got that but again going back to the swagger you feel the swagger in in the presentation of the lyrics at least from my perspective with gourd on this loved it loved it.Track 4:[48:43] Yeah there are some um really great songwriting techniques on this album that you can tell you know the sadies are just a pro band i think is it uh one of the guys from blue rodeo i believe was was quoted in the in the barclay book about saying that you know they're the world's greatest rock band and there's the little things like in this song they use the little bars of two to set up you know those changes and just lots of little things like that like an extra bar here an extra bar there it's just some really great little songwriting tricks what did you think justin i.Track 5:[49:14] Just this song you know growing up we only had like 10 or 12 channels on on tv and one of them was tnn the nashville network and so the grand ole opry was was on all the time, because we didn't have a choice. If it wasn't Hockey Night in Canada, it was TNN. And just this song, that run with the picking is really cool. It brought me back to late 80s, early 90s, just watching the hoedown.Track 4:[49:42] Not a country fan, but when I hear a great guitar player like that, though, like a great Nashville player, it really is great. This whole album isn't the type of music I would typically listen to. And I think that's why I gravitate more towards an indie rock feel, like the Battle of the Nudes. But man, this album is really, really solid.Track 6:[50:06] Yeah, it has a good... I mean, I know you guys say you don't like country, and I say it too. But I bet you you'd be surprised about what you do like that's country-esque. And so for me, when I think of country, I get turned away by some of the modern country. although I'm really digging some Chris Stapleton and some of these other guys I'm really digging. But like when I hear country, I think Kenny Rogers, Merle Haggard, I think Willie Nelson, I think, and I think we really do dig, even going back Hank Williams and even a little further, like when the, as you listen to, I love this that we're talking like, oh, we only had 10 channels and whatever else. And I'm going hockey night in Canada and the nashville network you know and throw in a little emma daughter's jug band christmas and that's my childhood and i'm happy and i love all that so i i i get what you're saying but this i mean the sadie's i think alt country i heard earlier from one of you guys that's very much the feel from devil enough you roll into i'm free disarray me justin you you inspired me because i I have the vinyl here with me. And so I quick looked at the bottom and I'm like, okay, I gotta catch this one cause I've missed all the other references that you mentioned. So you got Virginia Woolf, who's listed at the bottom of I'm Free Disarray Me. And when you do your research, you think about stream of consciousness.Track 6:[51:31] And that really, I think, kind of sums up your lyrics in this particular song.Track 6:[51:37] Swagger again it's it's it's it's it's the same but it's not i heard us all say that it's the same but it's not i i i loved where it went with this and it's bringing us down now right because we only have one more song we talked about the track listings and the order and now it's given us getting us i think this is kind of setting us up for saved at least me personally uh what you think craig.Track 4:[52:03] This was the first song that actually popped into my head just out of the blue one morning when i woke up because it took quite a long time for that to happen with this album i was still singing grand bounce songs you know every morning waking up and then one day it was that i was like wow okay and and same one thing i want to mention this is kind of, going off of what you're talking about with vinyl i was listening to this you know doing dishes.Track 4:[52:29] With you know on apple and the amount of times in the last few months of doing this you know this show with you guys listening to music and it glitches for just a second when i'm streaming and it just drives me nuts and so just that was one thing that i just had a note note about that that this album needs to be listened to on cd on on on vinyl anyways that was just a little pet peeve of mine and also the the snare again in this song was just a little a little much for me it was it was it was really up front and i i like loud drums typically in a mix but i just I don't know there there was it's almost like with the snare being that loud I'm missing a bit of the kick drum and speaking of which you guys must have noticed that the the bass players you know playing stand-up I had the thought a few times like I wonder and this is not to take away from what he's doing but I just wonder what it would have sounded like if they if they used an electric bass on this album because I found the bass to be not as prominent as on the last three albums you know there it wasn't sticking i don't think that's just part of the style of this band.Track 6:[53:38] Great i have a question though craig in when i look at the watch the videos oh yeah he has an he has an ampeg like he has a bass amp so he's taking a stand-up bass which traditionally you just mic or go straight into the board and he's he's running it through a traditional rock bass you know pickup bass right in through like the standard road hard ampeg so um so it gives it that good gritty sound but i will agree 100 it's not as prominent and i would like it to be a little bit more only just being a musician but it didn't didn't didn't dissuade me from my love for this album yeah.Track 4:[54:21] Not at all and i think it were like sometimes the best bass players are the ones you don't notice like they're just tight to the to the drummer and that's really all that matters but there was really only a couple times on this album where i where i noticed.Track 6:[54:34] Very accurate Accurate statement.Track 5:[54:36] This, I think, is my MVP. As a kid who was raised on prog, you fall into the song and just let it kind of take over. I don't know. I actually found, weirdly, a karaoke version of this on YouTube.Track 3:[54:52] Really?Track 5:[54:53] An instrumental version of this. No way. And I played the piss out of it just today driving. Driving and uh yeah it's it's really odd that this is the one that's an instrumental track for, yeah but just the phrasing of things lyrically and musically like he's it this doesn't sound like any other song that gourd has has put together as far as i'm concerned i.Track 6:[55:17] Love i love that connection with prog rock justin because you've mentioned that multiple times that that's something you love. And when you said it, I had not placed it until you said it. And I agree with you on that's a great, great, great description of it.Track 5:[55:31] There was a lot of references to the Sadie's covering Pink Floyd in live shows. And I'm like, oh, there it is right there. The song is that.Track 6:[55:42] The next one to the next one to could be, you know, Jim Ladd headset session, listening like with Pink Floyd.Track 3:[55:50] Oh, the next one is gorgeous, I think. It's the first slower tempo song that we have on the record called Saved.Track 5:[58:56] Again, I can't believe that the reviews said this album doesn't make sense because about halfway down, the plane starts to land, right? And every song from halfway on is just you're descending and you land perfectly softly unsaved. And this song also sounds a lot like Coke Machine Glow. And it's just really mellow and it's Gord doing his thing. and i i don't know i love it.Track 6:[59:26] Almost every album i feel like has had a an extended version of coke machine glow track to it i i i love that i i hadn't placed it until you just said that because i felt the same way about some of the other the other albums is there that could be on coke machine glow but you're exactly right and then he continues that theme as it goes almost like the uh like his is the poetry book.Track 3:[59:53] Craig is holding up his notes.Track 4:[59:55] Nobody else can see it. I said the exact same thing. Pattern of Ending solo albums and some hip albums with a track with a much different feel is what I had written.Track 5:[1:00:07] Which goes back to Road Apples.Track 4:[1:00:12] I really love the line the music is so loud that it flaps your pant leg. It reminded me a little bit of Yawning or Snarling. Just the line in that.Track 5:[1:00:23] Thank you. I would hold up my notebook if it wasn't typed out. Because that's exactly what I have to.Track 4:[1:00:30] We are, let's see, as of recording this episode, we are, what time is it there? We're about two and a half hours away from the 10 year anniversary of this album. Of the release of this album.Track 3:[1:00:41] Oh, get the fuck out.Track 4:[1:00:42] Yeah. Wow.Track 3:[1:00:44] Oh, wow.Track 4:[1:00:46] I just had to look it up yesterday. I was like, wow, that's pretty cool.Track 5:[1:00:48] Oh, shit.Track 3:[1:00:48] That is cool. Huh. I normally have them all in my calendar, and I don't have that in my calendar. Huh. Good find. Yeah, it's going to be, yeah.Track 6:[1:01:00] Good find, Craig. Great find.Track 5:[1:01:02] J.D., you have about two and a half hours to make a post.Track 3:[1:01:06] Any more unsaved?Track 5:[1:01:09] I don't know. I didn't pick it apart too much. I loved that imagery of the line, Craig, that you just mentioned. The music is so loud, it flaps your pant leg. And there's a really strange, it's almost not, rhythm to the way that he sings it. It would be really hard to transcribe that onto a, onto a sheet of music.Track 4:[1:01:29] I also enjoyed the, um, the, the, the, they finally played a bit without the drums, you know, like this whole album has been very much like a full band. And I mentioned last week, I believe that one of the strengths of, of country of miracles was that they had so many members that they could all just take a break every once in a while. They didn't feel the need to always fill up every space. This band's the opposite because they're, you know, there's just four of them and they, they, you know, they're very much a typical rock band where everyone's playing all the time and so i actually enjoyed that there was a bit of time at the start of the song without drums no no offense to the drummer um but sometimes you just need a break this.Track 6:[1:02:07] Song to me was the you know that that cup of coffee after dessert or you know the cigarette after sex it was that finisher it was uh it was that we're all in good, good, good company. I love the connection back with Coke Machine Glow. I love the connection back with that changing that ending song. But to me, it was, all right, more so than the others. It was like, okay, here's your big warm hug before whatever comes up next.Track 3:[1:02:39] Oh, I like it. It does feel like a warm hug. It's a very comforting song for me. I don't know why, but it chills me right out. It's a great cigarette after sex. Kirk, I love that. It's really tremendous.Track 5:[1:02:55] It sucks that this album was only a half hour long.Track 3:[1:02:58] I know. It's so strange after The Grand Bounce, which was nearly an hour. But again, these guys are just so efficient and economical.Track 5:[1:03:10] It's one good fast job, baby.Track 3:[1:03:12] That's right.Track 6:[1:03:14] So does- Hey, did you know that that is his second highest played single, or at least versus Spotify when I last checked? Does that not totally blow you away? Like at least if you just look in his Spotify category, I believe it's number two behind like the Chancellor, I think is probably the most sense. But now i'm now i'm gonna look sorry i'm gonna i'm gonna see if i can back my own research.Track 5:[1:03:43] So interestingly i i don't have hard copies of any of these albums so i'm i'm strictly listening on streaming i use the youtube music app i don't really care for the interface on spotify and there is zero existence of this album in that in that space so i had to download band camp and buy the album that way which i was happy to do yeah i love band camp but yeah i had to uh that's the only way I could find this lyrics.Track 6:[1:04:07] All right, gents. I did the research. I was incorrect by two. It's Chancellor, the East wind. Oh, I am lost.Track 4:[1:04:15] That's then one good. Mind blowing.Track 5:[1:04:17] No shit.Track 6:[1:04:18] Number four.Track 4:[1:04:19] Yeah.Track 6:[1:04:20] Like that. It's even in the top five to me over like.Track 4:[1:04:23] You know, it's a great song. These songs that I thought were more well-known. Wow.Track 6:[1:04:29] Thank you.Track 4:[1:04:29] Yeah.Track 6:[1:04:30] It's surprising to me that.Track 3:[1:04:32] Yeah.Track 5:[1:04:33] Well, even, Even the opener on this one, Crater, I mean, it has a great video too.Track 6:[1:04:39] Oh, that's right. That's right. It is a really cool video.Track 4:[1:04:43] So the album art's interesting too. Did you catch that there's the different members of the band on the album? There's probably about these portraits of like, I don't know, 50 people. And if you look carefully, you can find all of the members of the band. I did.Track 6:[1:05:01] I did, absolutely. It's, yeah, on the album.Track 5:[1:05:04] And the artwork and the sound and all that, it kind of reminded me of the Beatles. I don't know why. But there was something about it that was familiar.Track 3:[1:05:16] Beatles-esque.Track 5:[1:05:17] Yeah. Yeah.Track 6:[1:05:20] I could see that. I mean, especially from an artistic standpoint. Yeah. Very much can see that.Track 3:[1:05:26] Yeah.Track 5:[1:05:27] Overall, I was super happy that this was the next thing. And I wish that there had been another one to follow it.Track 3:[1:05:33] So does it stay in your rotation then, Justin?Track 5:[1:05:36] Mm-hmm.Track 3:[1:05:37] Yeah, it does. Craig, how about you?Track 4:[1:05:40] A couple of days ago, I probably would have said maybe not. It's an album I'll definitely pull out here and there. But no, I do think I really am enjoying it lately. And like I said, the turn of the weather really helped. This is, to me, a summer album, not a, I think, come winter, I'll put it away again.Track 5:[1:05:59] End but the i'm sorry but i got it before i forget it right we just had the eclipse as we're recording this and i was stuck in traffic it's a 17 minute commute to get home and it took me 90 minutes so i listened to this album three times on the ride home and it's a great even if you're stopped it's a great album to be in the car.Track 6:[1:06:20] It's going to hit the turntable for me on a fairly regular basis for a while. Like I said, Grand Bounce, I couldn't get it out of my head. And finally, it might even have been an I'm Free Disarray Me, just that very methodical line that came through that turned it for me. Me but i love i i love it absolutely love it in fact i'm i'm probably more excited about digging deeper into the sadies once this whole project is done the sadies and several other canadian bands that i'm not as familiar with that you guys have introduced me to and i'm very thankful for but uh yeah this this one's staying in the rotation if you've got any.Track 3:[1:07:02] Bands that are gore adjacent or canadian indie adjacent uh send them our way discovering downy at gmail.com And we'll be sure to read that email on the air.Track 5:[1:07:18] I will say that as much as I've enjoyed this album, I've also really enjoyed the songs that are not on the album that Gordon and Sadie have played together. The cover of Search and Destroy. Holy shit.Track 3:[1:07:32] Right, you sent that to us a few days ago.Track 5:[1:07:35] That song melted my goddamn face off. It was so good. So good. And it was like 7, 12 in the morning or something. I was like, all right, I'm out of bed now. This is awesome.Track 4:[1:07:45] One of the shows I found online was here in Vancouver at the media club. And I actually remember hearing about it. And I'm just kicking myself that I didn't get to that show. This is like a tiny, tiny, like this is where my original band a number of years ago did our CD release party. And yeah, there's maybe room for 80 to 100 people in there. would have been amazing.Track 3:[1:08:10] Oh damn that.Track 6:[1:08:14] Is definitely i don't have a lot of regrets gentlemen but not seeing any iteration of gourd solo is very much i'm glad video was around because but i would have really really really enjoyed.Track 3:[1:08:28] Seeing that feeling thousand percent live yeah.Track 5:[1:08:32] I go back to that sweaty basement uh in me in massachusetts and like dude i went to those shows all the time and I wasn't there.Track 3:[1:08:39] That's crazy so Justin you've already sort of given this away even though we we you know we tease it throughout the show and typically give it away at the end but we'll start with you and your MVP track.Track 5:[1:08:56] Yeah, it's totally I'm free, disarray me, which took me by surprise, but then it didn't totally. You know, after the way that by, you know, the music that my parents played when I was a kid, this song is just cosmic cowboy, trippy shit.Track 3:[1:09:14] Kirk, how about you?Track 6:[1:09:15] All right. Los Angeles Times.Track 3:[1:09:21] Excellent. I love that pick. I liked your pick too, Justin.Track 5:[1:09:25] That's the hometown.Track 6:[1:09:26] Oh, yeah.Track 5:[1:09:27] That's okay.Track 6:[1:09:28] And it definitely is not one that I would have really settled in on had it not been for our discussion today, honestly. Because almost every song on the album has really fallen into near the top. You know, Conquering Sun, Budget Shoes, I would say, of everything, those definitely hit that number one spot for me multiple times. But Los Angeles Times is the one that just kept coming back, and I just kept feeling, and I kept growing further, enamored with on all fronts. So that's my pick, and I'm sticking to it.Track 3:[1:10:03] Very cool. Craig, you?Track 4:[1:10:06] Yeah, I had a hard time picking a song. And I found, kind of like what Kirk said, there was almost less of a range between the songs I enjoyed and the songs I enjoyed less. They were all in roughly the same region, whereas the other albums, there was some tracks that right away really, really got to another level with me. I think this album maybe doesn't quite have quite the emotion that the first three did, which is usually what hits me when I really love a song. Usually it just grabs me emotionally. And this album didn't have that in the same way. my my go-to song here is is going to be uh it didn't start to break my heart until this afternoon, just just a good good punk rock song yeah just nice just a great yeah great driving tune and.Track 3:[1:11:00] Gets the blood flowing, right? And I agree with you about the previous three records. They're just sort of more raw and improvised feeling.Track 4:[1:11:08] And more range to them, right? This just feels... There was more... Yeah, just... More variety. Yeah, more...Track 3:[1:11:15] Dynamics. Yeah. Yeah.Track 5:[1:11:20] There was a point where critics were really starting to tear Gord and the hip down. Yeah. When this album was coming out. And they were like, all right, we get it. The soup's getting cold. It's the same shit over and over, year after year. The performances are boring. It's not great. And I think, I don't know, but I'm thinking that this album was Gord's big middle finger to those guys. I'm still doing this. He's 50 years old.Track 4:[1:11:49] Can you think of another artist that has done what Gord has done? He's now got three bands that are all so amazing. Yeah, that's right.Track 5:[1:12:01] At the same time.Track 3:[1:12:01] At the same time, yeah, you're right.Track 4:[1:12:03] Yeah, mind-blowing how much high-quality work he put out through his whole career, but especially in this middle chunk here.Track 3:[1:12:12] Well, and if you think about it, this is a perfect segue because beginning in 2012, he started work on the record we're going to talk about next week, which is Secret Path. And that record didn't see the light of day until 2016. 16. So even then with that record, he's assembled the band again, and it's a great band as well. So this guy is just producing at a level presumably around the same time he's doing Luster Parfait. Because he's working with Bob Rock pretty exclusively, right?Track 5:[1:12:49] Right.Track 3:[1:12:50] So, God, just fascinating what we're what we've gotten up to so far i can't wait we are halfway done his records we've got one more studio record and then god damn it three posthumous records uh it's going to be tough to get through those ones guys i know it yep anything else you want to say before we wrap things up i.Track 5:[1:13:15] Don't know i love it man i i love this project i feel like we're a broken record because we're all going to say the same thing and we'd say it every episode But this project has gotten me back into, just like you said, Kirk, discovering new music. Or it's new to me. Right. And I am finding so many new things that I didn't know I didn't know.Track 3:[1:13:35] Right.Track 6:[1:13:37] I'm i have been frightened from the beginning because you know you listen because it's your first time listening to a solo stuff for you know i was frightened every single album that, yeah i was going to be disappointed yeah yep and i just keep finding a new way to be enamored and i don't mind being that easy when it comes to gourd and what's going on uh you know i i we talked about, you know, my, my experience with the hip, you know, having to hear about it from friends and not having that, you know, immediate access to everything. So I'm thoroughly loving the fact that the emotion and the feeling that Gord and the hip, all the musicians he's been involved with on the solo, just keep raising the level. So I'm now just like, I'm, I'm, you know, what I like about this, you guys is you're nervous and worried. Now I'm not nervous and worried. I'm I'm just, I'm excited about listening to what's coming up and I'm so excited.Track 5:[1:14:37] If you, if you enter the, if you enter the room knowing it's going to be a mindfuck when you get there, it's perfect
This week in the pod, the gang is up to their neck in the fantastic effort by Gord and the Sadies. You're gonna want to check this one out!Transcript: Track 1:[0:00] Hey, it's Craig here, and I just wanted to let you know that Christmastime in.Track 1:[0:03] Toronto is coming early this year. Join me and the Discovering Downey crew for the recording of our podcast finale, live at The Rec Room in downtown Toronto on Friday, July 19th. Long Slice Brewing presents A Celebration of Gord Downey, which will include a special in-person interview with Gord's brother, Patrick Downey. Spend the evening listening to your favorite hip tunes provided by the almost hip and help us raise money for the gourd downy fund for brain cancer research with a silent auction featuring incredible items up for grabs visit discoveringdowny.com for tickets or for more information about the event, let's have a toast for charity wickedness and most importantly hope.Track 2:[1:04] DOS Beauty I name my guitar My Beautiful Behor Everybody's coughing here And music's infiltrating work In the most pleasant way It's a system based on silverware Listening's an extrasensory Perception And talking the only psychic thing and I can dress you in my thoughts until you wear them. I've been taking care of my clothes like they're cattle. Try this shirt. It would look so good on you.Track 1:[1:42] Welcome, music lovers. Long Slice Brewery presents Discovering Downy. Hey, it's J.D.Track 2:[1:52] Here, and welcome to Discovering Downey, an 11-part project with a focus on the music and poetry of Mr. Gord Downey. The late frontman of the Tragically Hip gave to the world an extensive solo discography on top of the hip's vocal acrobatics that awed us for years. So far, he's released eight records in total, three of them posthumously. Now listen, you might be the biggest fan of The Hip out there, but have you heard these records? Because I'm an inquisitive podcaster, I enlisted my friends Craig, Justin, and Kirk, giant fans in their own right, to discover Downey with me, JD, as their host. Every week we'll get together and listen to one of Gord's records. We're starting with Coke Machine Glow and working from there in chronological order. We discuss and dissect the album, the production, the lyrics, and we break it down song by song. This week we're going to be talking about Gord's fourth record, and his first and only with the Sadies.Track 3:[2:58] Occurring son kirk from chino how the fuck are things with you buddy jd.Track 6:[3:04] I'm uh i'm back home after a little bit of travel it's been good travel um it's allowed me to really kind of soak this album in so i'm excited talking about it with you boys.Track 3:[3:15] Can you confirm this craig i'm kidding yeah how's it going pretty.Track 4:[3:20] Good yeah also looking forward to talking about this album them and it this one took me a little bit of time to get into but we'll talk about that i have been a little under the weather since the last recording it was about halfway through the last podcast i started feeling something coming on and just won't go away just a cold thankfully but yeah other than that things are well.Track 3:[3:41] Well that's good justin you've been a podcasting machine today are you spent or are you ready to talk shop with me i'm.Track 5:[3:49] Just getting started buddy.Track 3:[3:50] Yeah well let's get into it then and the conquering sun is the album we are discussing this week after three consecutive solo outings with some form of the country of miracles gourd wrote and produced this one with the sadies who had just come from supporting the hip on their world container tour Like so many, this marriage was consummated by the CBC, when the Sadies chose Mr. Downey to collaborate with, as was the program's premise. The Sadies are a Toronto-based and road-tested throughout Canada and beyond, with an original lineup consisting of Travis Goode, Sean Dean, Mike Belotiski, and Dallas Goode, who sadly passed away in 2022. This band, as I mentioned, is road-tested with buckets of swagger and chops for days. But how do you talk about The Conquering Sun? After the loose and improvised feeling of the last three records, this record is tight and economical. With a 30-minute runtime, I had to listen twice to get my walk in.Track 3:[4:55] Of the four records we've listened to so far, this one makes my Olympic podium for rock and roll with a hard-fought bronze medal, which is nothing to shake a stick at unless, of course, you're shaking the stick in a complimentary fashion. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this album. In fact, in my opinion, this record is the closest we get to a sound that is reminiscent of the hip, up and down on this record. The songs are screaming for radio play if only radio had been a factor upon its release in 2014. From the rip of Crater right through Saved, there isn't a missed opportunity on this record. I could go on about how much I like this record, na-na-na-na, blah-blah-blah, etc. You might be curious how I'm literally singing this album's praises, yet I've only ranked it third of four. I promise I'm not damning with faint praise. It's more that I loved the ceiling of the country of miracles, particles and the idea that we don't get a fourth effort from that entity bums me out a little bit so it's hard to go into this one with that ripple of bummed outness influencing me a little more than frankly i'd like but who cares what i think let's check in with the crew craig we'll start with you this week.Track 4:[6:04] Yeah this album like i i mentioned took took a few listens to get into um it's definitely not in you know it's not my favorite of the four we've heard so far but it's really just it's drastically different it just has a different vibe and there are a lot of things I really like about it and I think that my biggest realization is this this is a summer album this is a a nice weather taking a drive in the car putting the windows down this it's that kind of album and for the first couple weeks I didn't have that weather but but just past in the past few days we have and it's just it totally changed my outlook of this this album.Track 3:[6:45] I was on mute. Justin, what are your thoughts overall?Track 5:[6:49] Oh, I needed this one. I needed this album to get my headspace back into this. And I think I'm going to rank this number two so far out of the four. I actually really love this album a lot. And like Craig, it took me a minute to get into it, but something clicked and I have been listening to it at least two or three times a day every day since. And in the car, on my phone, with or without earbuds trying to get the different parts of the sound, and it kicks my ass every time. I really just like this album from start to finish. Every song kind of sounds the same, which makes it sound like one big long song, and I really kind of love that.Track 3:[7:28] Interesting. I can't wait till we break it down. What say you, Kirk from Chino?Track 6:[7:32] Like my brethren here, it took me a while. In fact, it took me a while because it almost felt like a divorce and maybe a bit of an affair Was going on with with our buddy Gord. I was so I.Track 6:[7:48] Immersed into what was happening with the country miracles and like you said in the beginning like the ceiling like i wanted more and i was so ready for more i had the vinyl of this one the last ground bounce i didn't and i listened to it and i knew there was something there but i was angry honestly i was angry because i wanted more as we had mentioned but man did it grow and grow row. I'm not going to rank it right now because every time I rank something, a day or two goes by and something happens. And I realized, oh man, that was, you know, the grand bounce. That was Coke machine glow that, and you know, every album that we've had a chance to listen to has been, I think in every slot, if that makes sense, depending on the time of day or what's going on. And and so again it just brings you back to joy because i didn't dive in when it was happening which of course i'm a little sad about but i'm so excited now that i'm like i'm really loving music discovery again i'm really loving listening to albums i'm really loving i don't care if it's in the car if i'm walking the dog if i'm sitting at work if i'm you know working on something on on the computer and I've got the music going.Track 6:[9:11] Like I have not spent this much time with new music. I say that in quotes because it's obviously not new, but it's new to me, new to us.Track 6:[9:23] And I'm just, I'm loving the ride. That's all I got to say. This one is the last two, I mean, like I'm going to be listening to these forever. And I'm going to try and preach the word and get some people to jump on board because it makes me sad when I look at Spotify or something and I see the honestly and don't jump on me. It's like the limited number of listens to the Gord stuff. I have friends that have put stuff out that have more downloads than that. I'm not saying that in a negative, I'm saying that in a like, that shouldn't be. That shouldn't be, so. Right. My diatribe's over, sorry.Track 3:[10:03] No, no. Well, that's why I was mentioning off the top too too, that it screams for radio play to me. It's very radio-friendly. There's nothing over four minutes. And fucking radio just didn't matter in 2014. So of course we were never going to hear this. Unless we were paying very close attention.Track 6:[10:26] Absolutely.Track 3:[10:27] Clearly we were not.Track 6:[10:28] Absolutely. Radio.Track 5:[10:29] Radio still matters to me. I'm a radio guy. I'm going to tell you that right now. Yeah. Love radio.Track 3:[10:34] Radio doesn't love you back though. That's the problem. Like it's getting stripped down and worn down and these formats, you know, like if you've got a, if you've got a local that you love, then by going to stand with it, right?Track 5:[10:47] Yeah, you're right. We have, we have a, I'm going to sidebar here for just a second. We have a great station here in Southern Vermont, WEQX, which is one of the last great independent alternative rock stations in North America. And they discovered No Rain by Blind Melon. They were the first one to play it. And they just got this great pedigree, and they love to play Gord's solo stuff. From 2020 on, there's been a lot of new Gord solo stuff that's really been great.Track 3:[11:19] Get up. Right.Track 5:[11:20] And it's kind of been hard to not listen ahead during this project. Wow. I don't know if they played any of the stuff from this album, but this would totally fit.Track 4:[11:28] Yeah, we once had a really awesome independent radio station down in Bellingham, Washington, which we could pick up in Vancouver. And they actually, their tagline was something like, we don't play Canadian music because we have to. We play it because it rocks or something along those lines. And they would play The Hip and Rush. and yeah that's the only american station i've heard that that played a ton of the hip and yeah of course about 15 years ago they got whatever bought out by chorus or someone and it's now just yeah yeah your standard rock radio well.Track 3:[12:02] Should we eradicate this problem and educate people on this record go through it track by track are we ready let's.Track 5:[12:10] Go sure yeah.Track 3:[12:12] All right we start with track one side a it's the classic rock tinged crater what did you think of this one mr greg.Track 4:[12:25] My dad uh came to vancouver from new zealand in 1965 to to buy a 65 chevy impala and this song crater is a 1965 chevy impala cruising down the road it's just a great rock and roll track yeah um man that snare drum is yes snare snare yeah it is it is there in the mix yeah definitely i didn't dive into the lyrics at all especially um the songs that were more kind of rocking i i just i was just enjoying them and the only thought i had lyric wise was um almost like an idea of like either you're you're the crater or you're the meter meteor And I was kind of thinking along the lines of there's that not so great Dire Straits song, Heavy Fuel, where he says, you know, sometimes you're the windshield and sometimes you're the bug. And that was kind of the... What i got out of the lyrics on this song.Track 6:[13:25] I i wonder in the lyrics and maybe you guys did further research that i didn't see like how much of it was gord how much of it was the gents from the sadies because i i knew the name the sadies but i honestly until this i had not really you know dove into some of their music and i think in one of our you know communications justin had mentioned that as well like he's doing a lot of listening to the sadies and and i try i you know my listening at first it's this is it's going to sound weird um i did a lot of listening at first obviously like through spotify or whatever else but it wasn't until youtube and i got to see these guys and they're wearing like their nudie suits is what it looks like you know and i just i just saw a bunch of them they had a big exhibit at the you know country music uh hall of fame and they were We're talking about that LA country and, you know, very much a country tinge, but, you know, they're using those hollow body guitars. And anyway, so back to lyrics, like what's the balance between Gord and the Sadie's? Did anyone find anything on that?Track 4:[14:30] My understanding is that they, that the Sadie's wrote the songs and Gord wrote the lyrics that, yeah. And it was recorded apparently over a number of years. This wasn't like an album that was done in one session, which I find surprising because like someone said earlier, it's, it sounds just like a, it's a great album. It, it really sounds like it was just tracked in one day or something. It's yeah, there's a.Track 6:[14:53] There's YouTube has a, uh, interview of, I think the Sadie's had just put an album out. It was like 2010 and Gord was with them and they, you know, obviously had some discussions about their, their time together. And in some of the research it talks about, this has definitely been a long-term type of thing. Great song.Track 5:[15:10] Yeah, there was a CBC fuse in 2007 is what put them together. So it took seven years for this album to come out from that first collaboration. Collaboration I really like the sound.Track 6:[15:21] From a musicianship standpoint ethereal is really the kind of the adjective that came to mind on a lot of the the guitar parts that the Sadie's had you know very much a hollow body type guitar going through either a Fender a lot of reverb I really liked that driving sound I really really liked it it was it was pretty prevalent throughout in my opinion anything.Track 3:[15:43] Else on crater i.Track 5:[15:46] Just yeah i mean this is gourd this is like this is a live show on a record um this one song particularly and he is giving it all he has what at the end of the second verse and if we record any of these songs this is the one i'm doing because this is a this is a screamer and it's so much fun to be it you know we don't want to we don't want to do it we want to be it this song is fun to sing, Yeah. So I also, I downloaded an app because I noticed my foot was tapping a lot faster at the end of the song than the beginning. And I, so I, I downloaded an app and it picks up 13 beats per minute from the start to the finish.Track 4:[16:29] Oh yeah. That's something I'm going to be talking about later. Cause I, it was driving me nuts. One of the songs I was trying to actually figure out what was happening mathematically and yeah. Okay. I'm glad I'm not the only one noticed.Track 6:[16:43] I love that. I love the time changes in a variety of different songs. I put them down in a few notes. But the one thing I really want to say before we dive into any more, long live the guitar solo. And there's quite a few guitar solos on this album, specifically Crater. And they're just, they're solos. They're good solos. And on the other albums, we'll call lead lines, but there's not a lot of solos. And I'm digging that, getting that back, because we haven't had that in the first three.Track 5:[17:15] Oh, yes.Track 3:[17:16] Nice. Well, the next one is sort of the titular track, but not quite. The Conquering Sun does what for you, Justin?Track 5:[17:27] When I look out the window and see Audette's Blue Spruce Farm across the street, That's kind of what I think about. I mean, it's getting on time to plant. And here it is as we record this. It's planting season and working the fugitive dust. Nature, please be good to us. You know, we just had this massively wet spring that wiped out a shit ton of the farms around here. That's, you know, before they even got started. For me, that's part of what this song is. There's also the line, she is more than a conqueror. And I wonder if that's a reference to Gord's wife, Laura, with her recent cancer battle. I don't know when this song was recorded in the timeline of all that, like what year this happened. But I interpreted it as possibly something that could be a reference to defeating the cancer. And the other thing that I really, it was a callback to We Are The Same is when Gord's, his vocal run during hearing, ooh, day is your word, night is the glue. He does that exact same thing in The Depression Suite. That very same run, the change, the pitch, the length, I love it.Track 4:[18:41] Yeah, I caught that too. That's great.Track 6:[18:43] Great song. It was one of those. I think I mentioned on the last time we spoke, there was not a definitive MVP for me. This one has fallen in and out of MVP, and it may fall back in at the end of this recording. morning. But that's one of the things that really showed me this was a great album, but specifically this song. I just felt immersed in it. And like I said earlier, Ethereal, again, another great solo, another great, that sound that the Sadies have. They have, these guys, what are they like six, five, six, six, they look like trees and they might be a buck or five soaking wet and the suits are barely hanging on them and he's just playing this you know telecaster like it's a little tiny you know a small ukulele and they just have this they they just have this presence and like i said it really wasn't until i i started seeing them that i i got the sadie's because when i was listening it didn't hit me as much and i was kind of hoping i don't know if i mentioned this earlier because they were on the world container tour and i was wondering if they were the opening band I didn't find anything that showed them specifically, but when I watch the videos, it doesn't bring a memory or recollection that I saw. I think it was Sam Roberts that opened for a lot of the shows that I saw here in California.Track 5:[20:06] I saw Joel Plaskett as the opener on that tour.Track 6:[20:11] Got it. Got it. Yeah. So I was kind of hoping that they were one of the openers. But you know now i'm really excited that you know just in the last couple of days i would say is really when my attention has gone towards them and when you start hearing and seeing how they crafted these songs together and how they worked so well with gourd and his phrasing and and so yeah love this love this yeah.Track 4:[20:38] The the sadies are actually on tour as we record this and i'm hoping to pick to go down to the the vancouver show uh so you might you might want to look at dates they They might be coming down your way.Track 6:[20:48] I hope so.Track 4:[20:48] Yeah, this song, to me, as soon as I heard it, it reminded me of Nico Case. And Nico Case is someone who's worked with the Sadies. And so it is very much that sort of alt-country vibe on this song. And this was probably the song that drew me in right away. Again, like Kirk said, it was in the contention for my MVP track for sure, which, like you, keeps changing. and yeah it's just just a great feel to this song.Track 3:[21:18] Yeah i couldn't agree more i think we're two for two so far on this record and we're gonna find out that let's go pretty even record it's a pretty even fucking record los angeles times has the aforementioned swagger dripping from it, Kirk, did you like this one as much as I did?Track 6:[25:07] I'm going to say yes, absolutely. But it didn't start out that way. This actually was one of my least favorite tunes after the first couple of passes. I just didn't quite get it. It was just kind of like, it was almost too much swagger at first for me. Because remember, I think we're in a divorce right now. I think this is an affair that's going on. So I'm a little adverse to the song and the album and almost everything because I still have his last, you know, that last record that just moved us all. It was still here. So there was this almost a betrayal, swagger, distaste that I had in the beginning. But listening to it, re-listening to it, listening to it in headphones, listening to it on vinyl, listening to it in the car, listening to it in the plane, listening to it in the hotel. The key changes, like we'd mentioned earlier, just another great solo, just great rock. And, hey, I'm an LA guy. So this one definitely turned and has also filtered through multiple times sometimes on the mvp track side so yeah to me it's three for three and i'm just gonna pre-call it for y'all.Track 4:[26:22] Yeah yeah i found this song to be um i was the same way i found the the progression to be a bit generic at first and so i didn't really love it right away but yeah it really grew and i think what makes it work is that this band is just so tight they're so i mean loose but Yeah, the tempo, you know, picks up and, you know, there's the push and push and pull, but they are such a great band that they can pull off anything. Just a simple strumming pattern and make it sound pro. And there's that thing you mentioned off the top, JD, the blah, blah, blah, et cetera, which I was wondering if, I'm sure you guys were thinking the music at work, live, Gord would do the et cetera thing. Did you find anything lyrically, Justin?Track 5:[27:10] Yeah. So there's a dedication at the end of the lyrics for Walter Van Tilburg Clark, who wrote The Oxbow Incident, among many other works. And that became kind of one of the great Western movies of all time. And it's about, the subject is these cowboys thought that one of their buddies got murdered and that somebody stole their cows. And then they found this group of three people that they thought did it and they hanged them. And then they found out that the guy survived and it wasn't them and you know it was just a big mess so it was it was the oxbow incident and uh yeah so it was a complicated story and but this isn't about the story it's about the author there are a lot of references to lines in the book or the movie but it's you know there's a line he was born and raised and moved away and that's about i think walter van tillberg clark who was born in maine but then his parents moved him to nevada and then he moved to in New York and then he went he was kind of all over the place beyond that I don't know it's, There's one thing that is a bit of a departure, I think, on this album is that the lyrics aren't too deep. There's not a lot of mystery in this album with Gord's lyrics. And I was hoping for more of that, but the research was a little easier than I wanted it to be on this.Track 4:[28:26] That was something I noticed too, is like there didn't seem to be as much to dig into.Track 4:[28:31] And once I kind of got past that and just started enjoying it, I really did grow to appreciate the album a lot more. It's funny that you mentioned the Oxbow incident because number one, a couple of weeks ago i was in la and we did did a couple studio tours and this is one of the movies they actually mentioned i forget if it was warner brothers or universal but it was shot at one of those two places in the next song so one good fast job one of my notes here is oxbow incident because of the line it says art shot said wellman to fonda so wellman the director and uh fonda the the star of the show so um nice kind of a neat little tie and i had no idea that the previous song had that reference so i'm glad you caught that this song i really love and this was the one i was um i found really interesting the the progression you've got like almost like a eight bar blues but then they throw in an extra bar so it's like this nine bar which just throws you off off balance a little bit once you once you hear it a few times it makes perfect sense but there's the lyric about drop you know planes dropping paper and dropping scissors and the chimps becoming regular wizards i think it is. And so that made me think of, there's a couple of Simpsons episode that reference like the infinite monkey theorem.Track 4:[29:46] What is it? Infinite monkeys, or give a monkey a typewriter and let it type for infinity. It would create, you know, Shakespeare. And you know, it would just some ridiculous theory that has, you know, been, you know, criticized heavily, but I wonder if there's something to that.Track 6:[30:03] Sorely discredited.Track 4:[30:05] And I really like, there's the line too about something about forget the commas. This is one good fast job. And it almost made me think of this album that they just like banged off this out. Like, let's not, let's just have fun. Let's just write some songs and let's not take ourselves too seriously. So those are my thoughts.Track 5:[30:23] Well, I think there was some controversy over the name of the band. And there are commas in that band name. And I think that they're just saying, you know, screw it. And like, nobody asked for this. We're just doing it. let us enjoy it. I did see a couple of interviews where Gord and members of the band were like, can we not dissect this? This is just rock and roll.Track 4:[30:44] Yeah.Track 6:[30:46] One thing in watching some of those videos that I had mentioned, the last two songs that we discussed that they had played, it was a Greenbelt Harvest Festival thing show that was on. They had almost every song on there and he was playing with the Sadie's and watching the crowd to me was actually quite entertaining because they just sat there and looked in bewilderment right because I don't know they obviously have probably some relationship with with the hip and who knows if they're early hit people or later hit people or die hard all the way but when Gord does the solo stuff and then if they're not familiar with the Sadie's they just sat there and looked like yeah why don't what are we experiencing here what what's what's going on and bewilderment was the note note that i wrote right.Track 3:[31:34] Right i mean this makes no sense to me fuck okay sorry uh continue.Track 6:[31:42] It man one good fast job and almost back to kind of those punk type roots and that driving rocking it it's uh who i jd like this album has everything and, Also, one thing I wanted to mention, I know we're not through it all, but I think they did a great job of tracking. I really felt good about where all the songs were. I needed Crater to get me going, even though I was still mad and angry, like we mentioned, and then Saved at the end that we'll talk about. It just was like, okay, I got a good, nice, warm hug. Thank you. you um which.Track 5:[32:26] You know what's amazing is there were so many reviews about this album that said it was not cohesive and inconsistent and like what the hell are you talking about and.Track 3:[32:36] Uneven and blah blah.Track 4:[32:37] Blah yeah what.Track 3:[32:38] The hell man agree.Track 4:[32:39] Yeah no that's a reviewer who read that it was you know recorded over many years yeah that's ridiculous like maybe if you gave it one or two listens but even then even the first listen i didn't love it but it sounded like an album yeah Yeah. One more thing about this song though, before, before we move on, I love the middle section. There's like a bridge or maybe even call it a chorus. It only goes to it once the, I had to look, I had to go, I had to laugh. And it's really interesting how they go through it once, then there's that extra bar, like they keep doing, and then they change the chord progression and back off a bit. Like if you listen to the way the, you know, they're the same instruments, but they just back off and the feel changes totally. And it's such a great effect. Rather than ramping up a bridge, they almost like pull back a bit. And that really was unique. And it only happens once. It feels like a chorus to me, but it's right smack dab in the middle of the song. And I think it's two minutes and like 23 seconds or something. And this is definitely one of my favorites.Track 3:[33:43] Yeah, it's a good one. And the next one is a good one as well. It's got to hold the record for the longest title in Gord's solo oeuvre. Kirk mentioned a moment ago that there's a bit of everything on this record. And to me, the beginning of this song, just the very beginning, is shoegazy.Track 5:[34:00] Yes.Track 3:[34:00] Or it goes into a real punk sort of vibe. And it didn't start to break my heart until this afternoon. Justin, what have you got for us?Track 5:[34:09] So the line, we fought like two Irons, really stuck out to me. and it goes with Kirk. I don't know that this was the middle of a divorce. I think Gord is just polyamorous at this point because this project took seven years and in the middle of it, he released the third album, Grand Bounce. So he is just sleeping around. I love the punk, the hard driving, just we're going to beat the fuck out of this song.Track 4:[34:38] My first real positive experience with this song was driving to my show last weekend and it was like i said a nice day i was driving along and to me like i said it's a real good driving album and i was coming up to this i guess it was a school zone but it was a weekend so there's no school and there was a uh a flashing like speed limit sign it was like a happy face and as i'm driving by it's like it turns to a sad face because i guess i was a little bit above the limit i'm not a huge speeder but i found that kind of quite funny especially after the i just just listen to the line what is it um something about driving fast oh yeah drive drive it like we stole it yeah it's a great great line that's right and then later on there's the dishwasher loaded which i love because i i wish i could say that most of my music listening was in the car but i only have about a five minute commute to work so most of my listening is actually doing the dishes and so this is just a great song when you're doing the dishes and and dishwasher loaded it and it really really kind of got you know i.Track 5:[35:40] Had the same experience man that's.Track 4:[35:41] Found it pretty funny and i actually the first time i noticed that lyric i was actually had just put this open i was closing the door of the dishwasher and so it was just it was just perfect it's so funny yeah.Track 5:[35:51] That's amazing oh.Track 4:[35:53] And great harmonies too on the chorus like love those harmonies yeah.Track 6:[35:57] That's one thing you'll notice too when you watch those or or you see them like the the harmony part especially especially after what we had just experienced for the last three albums, you know, with the female voice going back to a male voice backing. I love that element that it brought to it. And I'm just gonna jump into the next song, Budget Shoes. This is one that I think has probably held the number one spot for me. I would say it's not necessarily still there, but it's been there more often than not. And maybe I'm far off on this, but being the American, one of the two Americans that really likes Canadian culture, it brought me back to Kids in the Hall for some reason. In fact, so much so, if you think of the Kids in the Hall intro, I actually looked it up to go hoping it was the sadies like that really would have made my day if it was the sadies that had done that song that's the intro to kids in the hall.Track 4:[39:34] There is there is a connection there and i hope i'm correct here but i believe i read that the dallas good the the younger brother who you know passed away recently who.Track 3:[39:44] Was the drummer.Track 4:[39:44] He he played so so the good family was a was a country family like they had like a family band and and the older brother travis actually played with his band and Dallas being younger he he went more towards punk and I believe it said that his first or one of his first bands was with one of the members of uh Shadowy Men is that the name of the band that does the theme yeah yeah.Track 3:[40:11] Shadowy Men oh.Track 6:[40:12] Wow nice it definitely was reminiscent of that uh the entire song to me is just brilliant and it it gives you I mean it It really just digs deep inside my soul going back to the ethereal. When Gord hits those moments of the desperation vocal that we heard a lot, not only in recording, but live when he was with the hip, that brought such a comfort to me, right? Knowing where the hip is at, knowing where Gord is at, knowing what's coming. Like this is three years prior to his passing. And just so thankful that we get another version of Gord. And that's really what it was to me is we got, we have the hip and we love that. We have these first three albums, but now we have another one. And it was, Justin, you mentioned it in his lyrics. It's like, I'm not trying to confuse anyone here. I got this great band. They've given me this good music and I'm just gonna give it, I'm gonna give it what's coming to me at the moment. so when he does his and i call it a desperation vocal i know exactly what.Track 5:[41:22] You mean when you say it though.Track 3:[41:26] Yeah.Track 5:[41:26] Yep. Yep. So I'm going to ask the Canadians in the room here about budget shoes because I did some research on this as well. And apparently there's a tradition in Canada that finance ministers buy a new pair of shoes before presenting the budget and they wear them on the floor. Or if they're pissed off about it, they don't.Track 4:[41:48] Oh, wow.Track 5:[41:48] And it's this thing that has happened since the 1860s.Track 3:[41:53] Jesus. Do they go bare feet? I mean, listen, I was a political science major, and I've never heard of it before, but that doesn't really mean anything.Track 6:[42:01] As the other American, I agree with what you say full-heartedly. Love it. Love that connection.Track 3:[42:10] Yeah, I think it's great.Track 5:[42:11] It was strange, but interesting. And I don't know if this song is a commentary on politics and that, or if it just works well with... I mean, this song sounds like, you know, we're sleeping in a tent in a winter storm unexpectedly in the middle of the desert, you know, and I've got nice shoes and you don't, you know, and I'm going to keep my feet and you're going to lose them to frostbite. I don't know.Track 4:[42:37] What I was thinking was I was imagining almost like an old Western movie. It's like sweltering hot in the desert. And yeah, they're camping overnight. Night and you know the most iconic thing you'll see in a western is that you know the shot of the cowboy boots and the pan up and and i'm just picturing this you know guy sleeping in his budget you know there's cheap shoes and that's kind of what i do balances on yeah yeah.Track 6:[43:04] Ouch shots fired they're.Track 5:[43:05] A great company and they.Track 6:[43:06] Make a fine shoe thank you we're not sponsored by any of these particular shoe brands yeah i mean budget shoes you talk about the westerns it's almost like a spaghetti western type feel just in that uh the guitar riff as well so.Track 3:[43:26] Oh, that's cool. I felt that, too. I wouldn't have put that together. All right, let's move on. Demand Destruction. Is it just me, Justin, or does this song feel very much like the Tragically Hip? Am I crazy?Track 5:[43:38] No, I don't think you're crazy about that at all. And this song is, I think, Gord kind of putting out his own views. Again, there's a notation at the bottom. The last one, Budget Shoes, was dedicated to Evan S. Connell, who was the author of the book about Custer where the title of The Grand Bounce came from. So that's a continuation. And then this one is dedicated to Dr. Helen Caldicott, who was an Australian physicist and anti-nuclear war advocate. And it just feels like a protest song to me. I really don't have a lot of notes about it. It's just a nice, fun tune. But there's definitely a message in there. And I think it's Gord speaking about, let's not fuck this up. and maybe some reverence for Dr. Caldecott. It says, I'm not a fan, I just like what you do. I don't know. I don't have a whole lot to unpack on this one.Track 3:[44:30] Right. Well, no, I think you unpacked quite a bit. Craig, what have you got for us?Track 4:[44:36] One thing I'll say about this song is I found maybe the snare was a little too biting for me. I found that if you if you were listening quietly it it just jumped right out of the mix to the point where you almost couldn't hear anything else and when you turned it up it just had just a little a tinge too much oh yeah you guys know who who mixed the album yeah so bob rock and i think he did a great job overall but it definitely you know he's known for those big huge drums and i just would have liked a little more balance i thought the snare was just a little peeking out a little bit too much the rest of the album i think it it works but maybe the song is the poppiest.Track 5:[45:17] I think of the of the songs on the album it's certainly.Track 4:[45:20] Radio friendly fairly typical like blues rock sort of yeah um riff at the start yeah.Track 3:[45:25] That's what reminds me it reminds me of something off of road apples you know oh yeah yeah that era.Track 4:[45:31] Yeah great great harmonies again especially in the chorus all.Track 3:[45:34] Right from there we get a change of pace with mandolin and organ off the top of devil enough. Am I right? Was it mandolin Craig?Track 4:[45:44] Um, yeah, I believe so. I need to go back and listen again. Um, yeah, this is the song I referenced earlier that was driving me nuts. Even today I was sitting there tapping my toes, like trying to figure out the time change. And I actually had this like theory about what they were doing with it, you know, how they're getting from one tempo to the next. And then I just realized after a while it's just feel it's all feel. And I won't even get into it, because there are some weird things that happen. And I think it is what Justin mentioned earlier, I think it's just that flexibility of, of like, you know, they're really pushing the tempo, bringing it back quite frequently. And so.Track 4:[46:25] Yeah, if anyone wants to transcribe this drum part for me and send it to me, I would love to see that because I would love to know mathematically how it works, but I'm pretty sure it is just like a feel thing. This was a song that really stuck out to me. I love that time change. Having said all that, it really, the first few times just really struck me. The guitar playing at the end, the sort of Nashville picking at the end is just amazing. There's a few songs that have those great guitar solos. I think often it's Travis, according to the videos I watched, although I believe Dallas will trade off solo sometimes too. There's the line, Streets Ahead, which of course is a song name from Now For Plan A. And I had just actually recently been watching Community. And I'm not sure if you guys know that reference, but there's a, you know, it's like a catchphrase of Chevy Chase's character. And I actually found a, I wondered if it was related and I found an interview where someone asked Gord that question and he's just like, what? He was so like, no, like what are you talking about? Which of course makes sense. I mean, you don't write books. All these songs you're not a prolific writer like gourd if you're if you're.Track 6:[47:36] Spending countless hours.Track 4:[47:39] Binging you know sitcoms with 120 episodes.Track 5:[47:44] Well and gourd gourd's a dan akroyd guy not a chevy chase guy.Track 6:[47:48] Yeah true hey going back to that the ending part craig yes uh you know they almost have a bluegrass feel in some of these instrumental type solos there's There's rock going on against a different instrumentation, which I absolutely love the devil enough to me almost was reminiscent of like your seventies kind of, you know, Barracuda and like the big songs that would have a slow intro and then rock out or go to another slow, but very seventies rock and kind of anthemic type of we're going to switch keys. We're going to switch tempos i very much got that but again going back to the swagger you feel the swagger in in the presentation of the lyrics at least from my perspective with gourd on this loved it loved it.Track 4:[48:43] Yeah there are some um really great songwriting techniques on this album that you can tell you know the sadies are just a pro band i think is it uh one of the guys from blue rodeo i believe was was quoted in the in the barclay book about saying that you know they're the world's greatest rock band and there's the little things like in this song they use the little bars of two to set up you know those changes and just lots of little things like that like an extra bar here an extra bar there it's just some really great little songwriting tricks what did you think justin i.Track 5:[49:14] Just this song you know growing up we only had like 10 or 12 channels on on tv and one of them was tnn the nashville network and so the grand ole opry was was on all the time, because we didn't have a choice. If it wasn't Hockey Night in Canada, it was TNN. And just this song, that run with the picking is really cool. It brought me back to late 80s, early 90s, just watching the hoedown.Track 4:[49:42] Not a country fan, but when I hear a great guitar player like that, though, like a great Nashville player, it really is great. This whole album isn't the type of music I would typically listen to. And I think that's why I gravitate more towards an indie rock feel, like the Battle of the Nudes. But man, this album is really, really solid.Track 6:[50:06] Yeah, it has a good... I mean, I know you guys say you don't like country, and I say it too. But I bet you you'd be surprised about what you do like that's country-esque. And so for me, when I think of country, I get turned away by some of the modern country. although I'm really digging some Chris Stapleton and some of these other guys I'm really digging. But like when I hear country, I think Kenny Rogers, Merle Haggard, I think Willie Nelson, I think, and I think we really do dig, even going back Hank Williams and even a little further, like when the, as you listen to, I love this that we're talking like, oh, we only had 10 channels and whatever else. And I'm going hockey night in Canada and the nashville network you know and throw in a little emma daughter's jug band christmas and that's my childhood and i'm happy and i love all that so i i i get what you're saying but this i mean the sadie's i think alt country i heard earlier from one of you guys that's very much the feel from devil enough you roll into i'm free disarray me justin you you inspired me because i I have the vinyl here with me. And so I quick looked at the bottom and I'm like, okay, I gotta catch this one cause I've missed all the other references that you mentioned. So you got Virginia Woolf, who's listed at the bottom of I'm Free Disarray Me. And when you do your research, you think about stream of consciousness.Track 6:[51:31] And that really, I think, kind of sums up your lyrics in this particular song.Track 6:[51:37] Swagger again it's it's it's it's it's the same but it's not i heard us all say that it's the same but it's not i i i loved where it went with this and it's bringing us down now right because we only have one more song we talked about the track listings and the order and now it's given us getting us i think this is kind of setting us up for saved at least me personally uh what you think craig.Track 4:[52:03] This was the first song that actually popped into my head just out of the blue one morning when i woke up because it took quite a long time for that to happen with this album i was still singing grand bounce songs you know every morning waking up and then one day it was that i was like wow okay and and same one thing i want to mention this is kind of, going off of what you're talking about with vinyl i was listening to this you know doing dishes.Track 4:[52:29] With you know on apple and the amount of times in the last few months of doing this you know this show with you guys listening to music and it glitches for just a second when i'm streaming and it just drives me nuts and so just that was one thing that i just had a note note about that that this album needs to be listened to on cd on on on vinyl anyways that was just a little pet peeve of mine and also the the snare again in this song was just a little a little much for me it was it was it was really up front and i i like loud drums typically in a mix but i just I don't know there there was it's almost like with the snare being that loud I'm missing a bit of the kick drum and speaking of which you guys must have noticed that the the bass players you know playing stand-up I had the thought a few times like I wonder and this is not to take away from what he's doing but I just wonder what it would have sounded like if they if they used an electric bass on this album because I found the bass to be not as prominent as on the last three albums you know there it wasn't sticking i don't think that's just part of the style of this band.Track 6:[53:38] Great i have a question though craig in when i look at the watch the videos oh yeah he has an he has an ampeg like he has a bass amp so he's taking a stand-up bass which traditionally you just mic or go straight into the board and he's he's running it through a traditional rock bass you know pickup bass right in through like the standard road hard ampeg so um so it gives it that good gritty sound but i will agree 100 it's not as prominent and i would like it to be a little bit more only just being a musician but it didn't didn't didn't dissuade me from my love for this album yeah.Track 4:[54:21] Not at all and i think it were like sometimes the best bass players are the ones you don't notice like they're just tight to the to the drummer and that's really all that matters but there was really only a couple times on this album where i where i noticed.Track 6:[54:34] Very accurate Accurate statement.Track 5:[54:36] This, I think, is my MVP. As a kid who was raised on prog, you fall into the song and just let it kind of take over. I don't know. I actually found, weirdly, a karaoke version of this on YouTube.Track 3:[54:52] Really?Track 5:[54:53] An instrumental version of this. No way. And I played the piss out of it just today driving. Driving and uh yeah it's it's really odd that this is the one that's an instrumental track for, yeah but just the phrasing of things lyrically and musically like he's it this doesn't sound like any other song that gourd has has put together as far as i'm concerned i.Track 6:[55:17] Love i love that connection with prog rock justin because you've mentioned that multiple times that that's something you love. And when you said it, I had not placed it until you said it. And I agree with you on that's a great, great, great description of it.Track 5:[55:31] There was a lot of references to the Sadie's covering Pink Floyd in live shows. And I'm like, oh, there it is right there. The song is that.Track 6:[55:42] The next one to the next one to could be, you know, Jim Ladd headset session, listening like with Pink Floyd.Track 3:[55:50] Oh, the next one is gorgeous, I think. It's the first slower tempo song that we have on the record called Saved.Track 5:[58:56] Again, I can't believe that the reviews said this album doesn't make sense because about halfway down, the plane starts to land, right? And every song from halfway on is just you're descending and you land perfectly softly unsaved. And this song also sounds a lot like Coke Machine Glow. And it's just really mellow and it's Gord doing his thing. and i i don't know i love it.Track 6:[59:26] Almost every album i feel like has had a an extended version of coke machine glow track to it i i i love that i i hadn't placed it until you just said that because i felt the same way about some of the other the other albums is there that could be on coke machine glow but you're exactly right and then he continues that theme as it goes almost like the uh like his is the poetry book.Track 3:[59:53] Craig is holding up his notes.Track 4:[59:55] Nobody else can see it. I said the exact same thing. Pattern of Ending solo albums and some hip albums with a track with a much different feel is what I had written.Track 5:[1:00:07] Which goes back to Road Apples.Track 4:[1:00:12] I really love the line the music is so loud that it flaps your pant leg. It reminded me a little bit of Yawning or Snarling. Just the line in that.Track 5:[1:00:23] Thank you. I would hold up my notebook if it wasn't typed out. Because that's exactly what I have to.Track 4:[1:00:30] We are, let's see, as of recording this episode, we are, what time is it there? We're about two and a half hours away from the 10 year anniversary of this album. Of the release of this album.Track 3:[1:00:41] Oh, get the fuck out.Track 4:[1:00:42] Yeah. Wow.Track 3:[1:00:44] Oh, wow.Track 4:[1:00:46] I just had to look it up yesterday. I was like, wow, that's pretty cool.Track 5:[1:00:48] Oh, shit.Track 3:[1:00:48] That is cool. Huh. I normally have them all in my calendar, and I don't have that in my calendar. Huh. Good find. Yeah, it's going to be, yeah.Track 6:[1:01:00] Good find, Craig. Great find.Track 5:[1:01:02] J.D., you have about two and a half hours to make a post.Track 3:[1:01:06] Any more unsaved?Track 5:[1:01:09] I don't know. I didn't pick it apart too much. I loved that imagery of the line, Craig, that you just mentioned. The music is so loud, it flaps your pant leg. And there's a really strange, it's almost not, rhythm to the way that he sings it. It would be really hard to transcribe that onto a, onto a sheet of music.Track 4:[1:01:29] I also enjoyed the, um, the, the, the, they finally played a bit without the drums, you know, like this whole album has been very much like a full band. And I mentioned last week, I believe that one of the strengths of, of country of miracles was that they had so many members that they could all just take a break every once in a while. They didn't feel the need to always fill up every space. This band's the opposite because they're, you know, there's just four of them and they, they, you know, they're very much a typical rock band where everyone's playing all the time and so i actually enjoyed that there was a bit of time at the start of the song without drums no no offense to the drummer um but sometimes you just need a break this.Track 6:[1:02:07] Song to me was the you know that that cup of coffee after dessert or you know the cigarette after sex it was that finisher it was uh it was that we're all in good, good, good company. I love the connection back with Coke Machine Glow. I love the connection back with that changing that ending song. But to me, it was, all right, more so than the others. It was like, okay, here's your big warm hug before whatever comes up next.Track 3:[1:02:39] Oh, I like it. It does feel like a warm hug. It's a very comforting song for me. I don't know why, but it chills me right out. It's a great cigarette after sex. Kirk, I love that. It's really tremendous.Track 5:[1:02:55] It sucks that this album was only a half hour long.Track 3:[1:02:58] I know. It's so strange after The Grand Bounce, which was nearly an hour. But again, these guys are just so efficient and economical.Track 5:[1:03:10] It's one good fast job, baby.Track 3:[1:03:12] That's right.Track 6:[1:03:14] So does- Hey, did you know that that is his second highest played single, or at least versus Spotify when I last checked? Does that not totally blow you away? Like at least if you just look in his Spotify category, I believe it's number two behind like the Chancellor, I think is probably the most sense. But now i'm now i'm gonna look sorry i'm gonna i'm gonna see if i can back my own research.Track 5:[1:03:43] So interestingly i i don't have hard copies of any of these albums so i'm i'm strictly listening on streaming i use the youtube music app i don't really care for the interface on spotify and there is zero existence of this album in that in that space so i had to download band camp and buy the album that way which i was happy to do yeah i love band camp but yeah i had to uh that's the only way I could find this lyrics.Track 6:[1:04:07] All right, gents. I did the research. I was incorrect by two. It's Chancellor, the East wind. Oh, I am lost.Track 4:[1:04:15] That's then one good. Mind blowing.Track 5:[1:04:17] No shit.Track 6:[1:04:18] Number four.Track 4:[1:04:19] Yeah.Track 6:[1:04:20] Like that. It's even in the top five to me over like.Track 4:[1:04:23] You know, it's a great song. These songs that I thought were more well-known. Wow.Track 6:[1:04:29] Thank you.Track 4:[1:04:29] Yeah.Track 6:[1:04:30] It's surprising to me that.Track 3:[1:04:32] Yeah.Track 5:[1:04:33] Well, even, Even the opener on this one, Crater, I mean, it has a great video too.Track 6:[1:04:39] Oh, that's right. That's right. It is a really cool video.Track 4:[1:04:43] So the album art's interesting too. Did you catch that there's the different members of the band on the album? There's probably about these portraits of like, I don't know, 50 people. And if you look carefully, you can find all of the members of the band. I did.Track 6:[1:05:01] I did, absolutely. It's, yeah, on the album.Track 5:[1:05:04] And the artwork and the sound and all that, it kind of reminded me of the Beatles. I don't know why. But there was something about it that was familiar.Track 3:[1:05:16] Beatles-esque.Track 5:[1:05:17] Yeah. Yeah.Track 6:[1:05:20] I could see that. I mean, especially from an artistic standpoint. Yeah. Very much can see that.Track 3:[1:05:26] Yeah.Track 5:[1:05:27] Overall, I was super happy that this was the next thing. And I wish that there had been another one to follow it.Track 3:[1:05:33] So does it stay in your rotation then, Justin?Track 5:[1:05:36] Mm-hmm.Track 3:[1:05:37] Yeah, it does. Craig, how about you?Track 4:[1:05:40] A couple of days ago, I probably would have said maybe not. It's an album I'll definitely pull out here and there. But no, I do think I really am enjoying it lately. And like I said, the turn of the weather really helped. This is, to me, a summer album, not a, I think, come winter, I'll put it away again.Track 5:[1:05:59] End but the i'm sorry but i got it before i forget it right we just had the eclipse as we're recording this and i was stuck in traffic it's a 17 minute commute to get home and it took me 90 minutes so i listened to this album three times on the ride home and it's a great even if you're stopped it's a great album to be in the car.Track 6:[1:06:20] It's going to hit the turntable for me on a fairly regular basis for a while. Like I said, Grand Bounce, I couldn't get it out of my head. And finally, it might even have been an I'm Free Disarray Me, just that very methodical line that came through that turned it for me. Me but i love i i love it absolutely love it in fact i'm i'm probably more excited about digging deeper into the sadies once this whole project is done the sadies and several other canadian bands that i'm not as familiar with that you guys have introduced me to and i'm very thankful for but uh yeah this this one's staying in the rotation if you've got any.Track 3:[1:07:02] Bands that are gore adjacent or canadian indie adjacent uh send them our way discovering downy at gmail.com And we'll be sure to read that email on the air.Track 5:[1:07:18] I will say that as much as I've enjoyed this album, I've also really enjoyed the songs that are not on the album that Gordon and Sadie have played together. The cover of Search and Destroy. Holy shit.Track 3:[1:07:32] Right, you sent that to us a few days ago.Track 5:[1:07:35] That song melted my goddamn face off. It was so good. So good. And it was like 7, 12 in the morning or something. I was like, all right, I'm out of bed now. This is awesome.Track 4:[1:07:45] One of the shows I found online was here in Vancouver at the media club. And I actually remember hearing about it. And I'm just kicking myself that I didn't get to that show. This is like a tiny, tiny, like this is where my original band a number of years ago did our CD release party. And yeah, there's maybe room for 80 to 100 people in there. would have been amazing.Track 3:[1:08:10] Oh damn that.Track 6:[1:08:14] Is definitely i don't have a lot of regrets gentlemen but not seeing any iteration of gourd solo is very much i'm glad video was around because but i would have really really really enjoyed.Track 3:[1:08:28] Seeing that feeling thousand percent live yeah.Track 5:[1:08:32] I go back to that sweaty basement uh in me in massachusetts and like dude i went to those shows all the time and I wasn't there.Track 3:[1:08:39] That's crazy so Justin you've already sort of given this away even though we we you know we tease it throughout the show and typically give it away at the end but we'll start with you and your MVP track.Track 5:[1:08:56] Yeah, it's totally I'm free, disarray me, which took me by surprise, but then it didn't totally. You know, after the way that by, you know, the music that my parents played when I was a kid, this song is just cosmic cowboy, trippy shit.Track 3:[1:09:14] Kirk, how about you?Track 6:[1:09:15] All right. Los Angeles Times.Track 3:[1:09:21] Excellent. I love that pick. I liked your pick too, Justin.Track 5:[1:09:25] That's the hometown.Track 6:[1:09:26] Oh, yeah.Track 5:[1:09:27] That's okay.Track 6:[1:09:28] And it definitely is not one that I would have really settled in on had it not been for our discussion today, honestly. Because almost every song on the album has really fallen into near the top. You know, Conquering Sun, Budget Shoes, I would say, of everything, those definitely hit that number one spot for me multiple times. But Los Angeles Times is the one that just kept coming back, and I just kept feeling, and I kept growing further, enamored with on all fronts. So that's my pick, and I'm sticking to it.Track 3:[1:10:03] Very cool. Craig, you?Track 4:[1:10:06] Yeah, I had a hard time picking a song. And I found, kind of like what Kirk said, there was almost less of a range between the songs I enjoyed and the songs I enjoyed less. They were all in roughly the same region, whereas the other albums, there was some tracks that right away really, really got to another level with me. I think this album maybe doesn't quite have quite the emotion that the first three did, which is usually what hits me when I really love a song. Usually it just grabs me emotionally. And this album didn't have that in the same way. my my go-to song here is is going to be uh it didn't start to break my heart until this afternoon, just just a good good punk rock song yeah just nice just a great yeah great driving tune and.Track 3:[1:11:00] Gets the blood flowing, right? And I agree with you about the previous three records. They're just sort of more raw and improvised feeling.Track 4:[1:11:08] And more range to them, right? This just feels... There was more... Yeah, just... More variety. Yeah, more...Track 3:[1:11:15] Dynamics. Yeah. Yeah.Track 5:[1:11:20] There was a point where critics were really starting to tear Gord and the hip down. Yeah. When this album was coming out. And they were like, all right, we get it. The soup's getting cold. It's the same shit over and over, year after year. The performances are boring. It's not great. And I think, I don't know, but I'm thinking that this album was Gord's big middle finger to those guys. I'm still doing this. He's 50 years old.Track 4:[1:11:49] Can you think of another artist that has done what Gord has done? He's now got three bands that are all so amazing. Yeah, that's right.Track 5:[1:12:01] At the same time.Track 3:[1:12:01] At the same time, yeah, you're right.Track 4:[1:12:03] Yeah, mind-blowing how much high-quality work he put out through his whole career, but especially in this middle chunk here.Track 3:[1:12:12] Well, and if you think about it, this is a perfect segue because beginning in 2012, he started work on the record we're going to talk about next week, which is Secret Path. And that record didn't see the light of day until 2016. 16. So even then with that record, he's assembled the band again, and it's a great band as well. So this guy is just producing at a level presumably around the same time he's doing Luster Parfait. Because he's working with Bob Rock pretty exclusively, right?Track 5:[1:12:49] Right.Track 3:[1:12:50] So, God, just fascinating what we're what we've gotten up to so far i can't wait we are halfway done his records we've got one more studio record and then god damn it three posthumous records uh it's going to be tough to get through those ones guys i know it yep anything else you want to say before we wrap things up i.Track 5:[1:13:15] Don't know i love it man i i love this project i feel like we're a broken record because we're all going to say the same thing and we'd say it every episode But this project has gotten me back into, just like you said, Kirk, discovering new music. Or it's new to me. Right. And I am finding so many new things that I didn't know I didn't know.Track 3:[1:13:35] Right.Track 6:[1:13:37] I'm i have been frightened from the beginning because you know you listen because it's your first time listening to a solo stuff for you know i was frightened every single album that, yeah i was going to be disappointed yeah yep and i just keep finding a new way to be enamored and i don't mind being that easy when it comes to gourd and what's going on uh you know i i we talked about, you know, my, my experience with the hip, you know, having to hear about it from friends and not having that, you know, immediate access to everything. So I'm thoroughly loving the fact that the emotion and the feeling that Gord and the hip, all the musicians he's been involved with on the solo, just keep raising the level. So I'm now just like, I'm, I'm, you know, what I like about this, you guys is you're nervous and worried. Now I'm not nervous and worried. I'm I'm just, I'm excited about listening to what's coming up and I'm so excited.Track 5:[1:14:37] If you, if you enter the, if you enter the room knowing it's going to be a mindfuck when you get there, it's perfect
This week in the pod, the gang is up to their neck in the fantastic effort by Gord and the Sadies. You're gonna want to check this one out!Transcript: Track 1:[0:00] Hey, it's Craig here, and I just wanted to let you know that Christmastime in.Track 1:[0:03] Toronto is coming early this year. Join me and the Discovering Downey crew for the recording of our podcast finale, live at The Rec Room in downtown Toronto on Friday, July 19th. Long Slice Brewing presents A Celebration of Gord Downey, which will include a special in-person interview with Gord's brother, Patrick Downey. Spend the evening listening to your favorite hip tunes provided by the almost hip and help us raise money for the gourd downy fund for brain cancer research with a silent auction featuring incredible items up for grabs visit discoveringdowny.com for tickets or for more information about the event, let's have a toast for charity wickedness and most importantly hope.Track 2:[1:04] DOS Beauty I name my guitar My Beautiful Behor Everybody's coughing here And music's infiltrating work In the most pleasant way It's a system based on silverware Listening's an extrasensory Perception And talking the only psychic thing and I can dress you in my thoughts until you wear them. I've been taking care of my clothes like they're cattle. Try this shirt. It would look so good on you.Track 1:[1:42] Welcome, music lovers. Long Slice Brewery presents Discovering Downy. Hey, it's J.D.Track 2:[1:52] Here, and welcome to Discovering Downey, an 11-part project with a focus on the music and poetry of Mr. Gord Downey. The late frontman of the Tragically Hip gave to the world an extensive solo discography on top of the hip's vocal acrobatics that awed us for years. So far, he's released eight records in total, three of them posthumously. Now listen, you might be the biggest fan of The Hip out there, but have you heard these records? Because I'm an inquisitive podcaster, I enlisted my friends Craig, Justin, and Kirk, giant fans in their own right, to discover Downey with me, JD, as their host. Every week we'll get together and listen to one of Gord's records. We're starting with Coke Machine Glow and working from there in chronological order. We discuss and dissect the album, the production, the lyrics, and we break it down song by song. This week we're going to be talking about Gord's fourth record, and his first and only with the Sadies.Track 3:[2:58] Occurring son kirk from chino how the fuck are things with you buddy jd.Track 6:[3:04] I'm uh i'm back home after a little bit of travel it's been good travel um it's allowed me to really kind of soak this album in so i'm excited talking about it with you boys.Track 3:[3:15] Can you confirm this craig i'm kidding yeah how's it going pretty.Track 4:[3:20] Good yeah also looking forward to talking about this album them and it this one took me a little bit of time to get into but we'll talk about that i have been a little under the weather since the last recording it was about halfway through the last podcast i started feeling something coming on and just won't go away just a cold thankfully but yeah other than that things are well.Track 3:[3:41] Well that's good justin you've been a podcasting machine today are you spent or are you ready to talk shop with me i'm.Track 5:[3:49] Just getting started buddy.Track 3:[3:50] Yeah well let's get into it then and the conquering sun is the album we are discussing this week after three consecutive solo outings with some form of the country of miracles gourd wrote and produced this one with the sadies who had just come from supporting the hip on their world container tour Like so many, this marriage was consummated by the CBC, when the Sadies chose Mr. Downey to collaborate with, as was the program's premise. The Sadies are a Toronto-based and road-tested throughout Canada and beyond, with an original lineup consisting of Travis Goode, Sean Dean, Mike Belotiski, and Dallas Goode, who sadly passed away in 2022. This band, as I mentioned, is road-tested with buckets of swagger and chops for days. But how do you talk about The Conquering Sun? After the loose and improvised feeling of the last three records, this record is tight and economical. With a 30-minute runtime, I had to listen twice to get my walk in.Track 3:[4:55] Of the four records we've listened to so far, this one makes my Olympic podium for rock and roll with a hard-fought bronze medal, which is nothing to shake a stick at unless, of course, you're shaking the stick in a complimentary fashion. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this album. In fact, in my opinion, this record is the closest we get to a sound that is reminiscent of the hip, up and down on this record. The songs are screaming for radio play if only radio had been a factor upon its release in 2014. From the rip of Crater right through Saved, there isn't a missed opportunity on this record. I could go on about how much I like this record, na-na-na-na, blah-blah-blah, etc. You might be curious how I'm literally singing this album's praises, yet I've only ranked it third of four. I promise I'm not damning with faint praise. It's more that I loved the ceiling of the country of miracles, particles and the idea that we don't get a fourth effort from that entity bums me out a little bit so it's hard to go into this one with that ripple of bummed outness influencing me a little more than frankly i'd like but who cares what i think let's check in with the crew craig we'll start with you this week.Track 4:[6:04] Yeah this album like i i mentioned took took a few listens to get into um it's definitely not in you know it's not my favorite of the four we've heard so far but it's really just it's drastically different it just has a different vibe and there are a lot of things I really like about it and I think that my biggest realization is this this is a summer album this is a a nice weather taking a drive in the car putting the windows down this it's that kind of album and for the first couple weeks I didn't have that weather but but just past in the past few days we have and it's just it totally changed my outlook of this this album.Track 3:[6:45] I was on mute. Justin, what are your thoughts overall?Track 5:[6:49] Oh, I needed this one. I needed this album to get my headspace back into this. And I think I'm going to rank this number two so far out of the four. I actually really love this album a lot. And like Craig, it took me a minute to get into it, but something clicked and I have been listening to it at least two or three times a day every day since. And in the car, on my phone, with or without earbuds trying to get the different parts of the sound, and it kicks my ass every time. I really just like this album from start to finish. Every song kind of sounds the same, which makes it sound like one big long song, and I really kind of love that.Track 3:[7:28] Interesting. I can't wait till we break it down. What say you, Kirk from Chino?Track 6:[7:32] Like my brethren here, it took me a while. In fact, it took me a while because it almost felt like a divorce and maybe a bit of an affair Was going on with with our buddy Gord. I was so I.Track 6:[7:48] Immersed into what was happening with the country miracles and like you said in the beginning like the ceiling like i wanted more and i was so ready for more i had the vinyl of this one the last ground bounce i didn't and i listened to it and i knew there was something there but i was angry honestly i was angry because i wanted more as we had mentioned but man did it grow and grow row. I'm not going to rank it right now because every time I rank something, a day or two goes by and something happens. And I realized, oh man, that was, you know, the grand bounce. That was Coke machine glow that, and you know, every album that we've had a chance to listen to has been, I think in every slot, if that makes sense, depending on the time of day or what's going on. And and so again it just brings you back to joy because i didn't dive in when it was happening which of course i'm a little sad about but i'm so excited now that i'm like i'm really loving music discovery again i'm really loving listening to albums i'm really loving i don't care if it's in the car if i'm walking the dog if i'm sitting at work if i'm you know working on something on on the computer and I've got the music going.Track 6:[9:11] Like I have not spent this much time with new music. I say that in quotes because it's obviously not new, but it's new to me, new to us.Track 6:[9:23] And I'm just, I'm loving the ride. That's all I got to say. This one is the last two, I mean, like I'm going to be listening to these forever. And I'm going to try and preach the word and get some people to jump on board because it makes me sad when I look at Spotify or something and I see the honestly and don't jump on me. It's like the limited number of listens to the Gord stuff. I have friends that have put stuff out that have more downloads than that. I'm not saying that in a negative, I'm saying that in a like, that shouldn't be. That shouldn't be, so. Right. My diatribe's over, sorry.Track 3:[10:03] No, no. Well, that's why I was mentioning off the top too too, that it screams for radio play to me. It's very radio-friendly. There's nothing over four minutes. And fucking radio just didn't matter in 2014. So of course we were never going to hear this. Unless we were paying very close attention.Track 6:[10:26] Absolutely.Track 3:[10:27] Clearly we were not.Track 6:[10:28] Absolutely. Radio.Track 5:[10:29] Radio still matters to me. I'm a radio guy. I'm going to tell you that right now. Yeah. Love radio.Track 3:[10:34] Radio doesn't love you back though. That's the problem. Like it's getting stripped down and worn down and these formats, you know, like if you've got a, if you've got a local that you love, then by going to stand with it, right?Track 5:[10:47] Yeah, you're right. We have, we have a, I'm going to sidebar here for just a second. We have a great station here in Southern Vermont, WEQX, which is one of the last great independent alternative rock stations in North America. And they discovered No Rain by Blind Melon. They were the first one to play it. And they just got this great pedigree, and they love to play Gord's solo stuff. From 2020 on, there's been a lot of new Gord solo stuff that's really been great.Track 3:[11:19] Get up. Right.Track 5:[11:20] And it's kind of been hard to not listen ahead during this project. Wow. I don't know if they played any of the stuff from this album, but this would totally fit.Track 4:[11:28] Yeah, we once had a really awesome independent radio station down in Bellingham, Washington, which we could pick up in Vancouver. And they actually, their tagline was something like, we don't play Canadian music because we have to. We play it because it rocks or something along those lines. And they would play The Hip and Rush. and yeah that's the only american station i've heard that that played a ton of the hip and yeah of course about 15 years ago they got whatever bought out by chorus or someone and it's now just yeah yeah your standard rock radio well.Track 3:[12:02] Should we eradicate this problem and educate people on this record go through it track by track are we ready let's.Track 5:[12:10] Go sure yeah.Track 3:[12:12] All right we start with track one side a it's the classic rock tinged crater what did you think of this one mr greg.Track 4:[12:25] My dad uh came to vancouver from new zealand in 1965 to to buy a 65 chevy impala and this song crater is a 1965 chevy impala cruising down the road it's just a great rock and roll track yeah um man that snare drum is yes snare snare yeah it is it is there in the mix yeah definitely i didn't dive into the lyrics at all especially um the songs that were more kind of rocking i i just i was just enjoying them and the only thought i had lyric wise was um almost like an idea of like either you're you're the crater or you're the meter meteor And I was kind of thinking along the lines of there's that not so great Dire Straits song, Heavy Fuel, where he says, you know, sometimes you're the windshield and sometimes you're the bug. And that was kind of the... What i got out of the lyrics on this song.Track 6:[13:25] I i wonder in the lyrics and maybe you guys did further research that i didn't see like how much of it was gord how much of it was the gents from the sadies because i i knew the name the sadies but i honestly until this i had not really you know dove into some of their music and i think in one of our you know communications justin had mentioned that as well like he's doing a lot of listening to the sadies and and i try i you know my listening at first it's this is it's going to sound weird um i did a lot of listening at first obviously like through spotify or whatever else but it wasn't until youtube and i got to see these guys and they're wearing like their nudie suits is what it looks like you know and i just i just saw a bunch of them they had a big exhibit at the you know country music uh hall of fame and they were We're talking about that LA country and, you know, very much a country tinge, but, you know, they're using those hollow body guitars. And anyway, so back to lyrics, like what's the balance between Gord and the Sadie's? Did anyone find anything on that?Track 4:[14:30] My understanding is that they, that the Sadie's wrote the songs and Gord wrote the lyrics that, yeah. And it was recorded apparently over a number of years. This wasn't like an album that was done in one session, which I find surprising because like someone said earlier, it's, it sounds just like a, it's a great album. It, it really sounds like it was just tracked in one day or something. It's yeah, there's a.Track 6:[14:53] There's YouTube has a, uh, interview of, I think the Sadie's had just put an album out. It was like 2010 and Gord was with them and they, you know, obviously had some discussions about their, their time together. And in some of the research it talks about, this has definitely been a long-term type of thing. Great song.Track 5:[15:10] Yeah, there was a CBC fuse in 2007 is what put them together. So it took seven years for this album to come out from that first collaboration. Collaboration I really like the sound.Track 6:[15:21] From a musicianship standpoint ethereal is really the kind of the adjective that came to mind on a lot of the the guitar parts that the Sadie's had you know very much a hollow body type guitar going through either a Fender a lot of reverb I really liked that driving sound I really really liked it it was it was pretty prevalent throughout in my opinion anything.Track 3:[15:43] Else on crater i.Track 5:[15:46] Just yeah i mean this is gourd this is like this is a live show on a record um this one song particularly and he is giving it all he has what at the end of the second verse and if we record any of these songs this is the one i'm doing because this is a this is a screamer and it's so much fun to be it you know we don't want to we don't want to do it we want to be it this song is fun to sing, Yeah. So I also, I downloaded an app because I noticed my foot was tapping a lot faster at the end of the song than the beginning. And I, so I, I downloaded an app and it picks up 13 beats per minute from the start to the finish.Track 4:[16:29] Oh yeah. That's something I'm going to be talking about later. Cause I, it was driving me nuts. One of the songs I was trying to actually figure out what was happening mathematically and yeah. Okay. I'm glad I'm not the only one noticed.Track 6:[16:43] I love that. I love the time changes in a variety of different songs. I put them down in a few notes. But the one thing I really want to say before we dive into any more, long live the guitar solo. And there's quite a few guitar solos on this album, specifically Crater. And they're just, they're solos. They're good solos. And on the other albums, we'll call lead lines, but there's not a lot of solos. And I'm digging that, getting that back, because we haven't had that in the first three.Track 5:[17:15] Oh, yes.Track 3:[17:16] Nice. Well, the next one is sort of the titular track, but not quite. The Conquering Sun does what for you, Justin?Track 5:[17:27] When I look out the window and see Audette's Blue Spruce Farm across the street, That's kind of what I think about. I mean, it's getting on time to plant. And here it is as we record this. It's planting season and working the fugitive dust. Nature, please be good to us. You know, we just had this massively wet spring that wiped out a shit ton of the farms around here. That's, you know, before they even got started. For me, that's part of what this song is. There's also the line, she is more than a conqueror. And I wonder if that's a reference to Gord's wife, Laura, with her recent cancer battle. I don't know when this song was recorded in the timeline of all that, like what year this happened. But I interpreted it as possibly something that could be a reference to defeating the cancer. And the other thing that I really, it was a callback to We Are The Same is when Gord's, his vocal run during hearing, ooh, day is your word, night is the glue. He does that exact same thing in The Depression Suite. That very same run, the change, the pitch, the length, I love it.Track 4:[18:41] Yeah, I caught that too. That's great.Track 6:[18:43] Great song. It was one of those. I think I mentioned on the last time we spoke, there was not a definitive MVP for me. This one has fallen in and out of MVP, and it may fall back in at the end of this recording. morning. But that's one of the things that really showed me this was a great album, but specifically this song. I just felt immersed in it. And like I said earlier, Ethereal, again, another great solo, another great, that sound that the Sadies have. They have, these guys, what are they like six, five, six, six, they look like trees and they might be a buck or five soaking wet and the suits are barely hanging on them and he's just playing this you know telecaster like it's a little tiny you know a small ukulele and they just have this they they just have this presence and like i said it really wasn't until i i started seeing them that i i got the sadie's because when i was listening it didn't hit me as much and i was kind of hoping i don't know if i mentioned this earlier because they were on the world container tour and i was wondering if they were the opening band I didn't find anything that showed them specifically, but when I watch the videos, it doesn't bring a memory or recollection that I saw. I think it was Sam Roberts that opened for a lot of the shows that I saw here in California.Track 5:[20:06] I saw Joel Plaskett as the opener on that tour.Track 6:[20:11] Got it. Got it. Yeah. So I was kind of hoping that they were one of the openers. But you know now i'm really excited that you know just in the last couple of days i would say is really when my attention has gone towards them and when you start hearing and seeing how they crafted these songs together and how they worked so well with gourd and his phrasing and and so yeah love this love this yeah.Track 4:[20:38] The the sadies are actually on tour as we record this and i'm hoping to pick to go down to the the vancouver show uh so you might you might want to look at dates they They might be coming down your way.Track 6:[20:48] I hope so.Track 4:[20:48] Yeah, this song, to me, as soon as I heard it, it reminded me of Nico Case. And Nico Case is someone who's worked with the Sadies. And so it is very much that sort of alt-country vibe on this song. And this was probably the song that drew me in right away. Again, like Kirk said, it was in the contention for my MVP track for sure, which, like you, keeps changing. and yeah it's just just a great feel to this song.Track 3:[21:18] Yeah i couldn't agree more i think we're two for two so far on this record and we're gonna find out that let's go pretty even record it's a pretty even fucking record los angeles times has the aforementioned swagger dripping from it, Kirk, did you like this one as much as I did?Track 6:[25:07] I'm going to say yes, absolutely. But it didn't start out that way. This actually was one of my least favorite tunes after the first couple of passes. I just didn't quite get it. It was just kind of like, it was almost too much swagger at first for me. Because remember, I think we're in a divorce right now. I think this is an affair that's going on. So I'm a little adverse to the song and the album and almost everything because I still have his last, you know, that last record that just moved us all. It was still here. So there was this almost a betrayal, swagger, distaste that I had in the beginning. But listening to it, re-listening to it, listening to it in headphones, listening to it on vinyl, listening to it in the car, listening to it in the plane, listening to it in the hotel. The key changes, like we'd mentioned earlier, just another great solo, just great rock. And, hey, I'm an LA guy. So this one definitely turned and has also filtered through multiple times sometimes on the mvp track side so yeah to me it's three for three and i'm just gonna pre-call it for y'all.Track 4:[26:22] Yeah yeah i found this song to be um i was the same way i found the the progression to be a bit generic at first and so i didn't really love it right away but yeah it really grew and i think what makes it work is that this band is just so tight they're so i mean loose but Yeah, the tempo, you know, picks up and, you know, there's the push and push and pull, but they are such a great band that they can pull off anything. Just a simple strumming pattern and make it sound pro. And there's that thing you mentioned off the top, JD, the blah, blah, blah, et cetera, which I was wondering if, I'm sure you guys were thinking the music at work, live, Gord would do the et cetera thing. Did you find anything lyrically, Justin?Track 5:[27:10] Yeah. So there's a dedication at the end of the lyrics for Walter Van Tilburg Clark, who wrote The Oxbow Incident, among many other works. And that became kind of one of the great Western movies of all time. And it's about, the subject is these cowboys thought that one of their buddies got murdered and that somebody stole their cows. And then they found this group of three people that they thought did it and they hanged them. And then they found out that the guy survived and it wasn't them and you know it was just a big mess so it was it was the oxbow incident and uh yeah so it was a complicated story and but this isn't about the story it's about the author there are a lot of references to lines in the book or the movie but it's you know there's a line he was born and raised and moved away and that's about i think walter van tillberg clark who was born in maine but then his parents moved him to nevada and then he moved to in New York and then he went he was kind of all over the place beyond that I don't know it's, There's one thing that is a bit of a departure, I think, on this album is that the lyrics aren't too deep. There's not a lot of mystery in this album with Gord's lyrics. And I was hoping for more of that, but the research was a little easier than I wanted it to be on this.Track 4:[28:26] That was something I noticed too, is like there didn't seem to be as much to dig into.Track 4:[28:31] And once I kind of got past that and just started enjoying it, I really did grow to appreciate the album a lot more. It's funny that you mentioned the Oxbow incident because number one, a couple of weeks ago i was in la and we did did a couple studio tours and this is one of the movies they actually mentioned i forget if it was warner brothers or universal but it was shot at one of those two places in the next song so one good fast job one of my notes here is oxbow incident because of the line it says art shot said wellman to fonda so wellman the director and uh fonda the the star of the show so um nice kind of a neat little tie and i had no idea that the previous song had that reference so i'm glad you caught that this song i really love and this was the one i was um i found really interesting the the progression you've got like almost like a eight bar blues but then they throw in an extra bar so it's like this nine bar which just throws you off off balance a little bit once you once you hear it a few times it makes perfect sense but there's the lyric about drop you know planes dropping paper and dropping scissors and the chimps becoming regular wizards i think it is. And so that made me think of, there's a couple of Simpsons episode that reference like the infinite monkey theorem.Track 4:[29:46] What is it? Infinite monkeys, or give a monkey a typewriter and let it type for infinity. It would create, you know, Shakespeare. And you know, it would just some ridiculous theory that has, you know, been, you know, criticized heavily, but I wonder if there's something to that.Track 6:[30:03] Sorely discredited.Track 4:[30:05] And I really like, there's the line too about something about forget the commas. This is one good fast job. And it almost made me think of this album that they just like banged off this out. Like, let's not, let's just have fun. Let's just write some songs and let's not take ourselves too seriously. So those are my thoughts.Track 5:[30:23] Well, I think there was some controversy over the name of the band. And there are commas in that band name. And I think that they're just saying, you know, screw it. And like, nobody asked for this. We're just doing it. let us enjoy it. I did see a couple of interviews where Gord and members of the band were like, can we not dissect this? This is just rock and roll.Track 4:[30:44] Yeah.Track 6:[30:46] One thing in watching some of those videos that I had mentioned, the last two songs that we discussed that they had played, it was a Greenbelt Harvest Festival thing show that was on. They had almost every song on there and he was playing with the Sadie's and watching the crowd to me was actually quite entertaining because they just sat there and looked in bewilderment right because I don't know they obviously have probably some relationship with with the hip and who knows if they're early hit people or later hit people or die hard all the way but when Gord does the solo stuff and then if they're not familiar with the Sadie's they just sat there and looked like yeah why don't what are we experiencing here what what's what's going on and bewilderment was the note note that i wrote right.Track 3:[31:34] Right i mean this makes no sense to me fuck okay sorry uh continue.Track 6:[31:42] It man one good fast job and almost back to kind of those punk type roots and that driving rocking it it's uh who i jd like this album has everything and, Also, one thing I wanted to mention, I know we're not through it all, but I think they did a great job of tracking. I really felt good about where all the songs were. I needed Crater to get me going, even though I was still mad and angry, like we mentioned, and then Saved at the end that we'll talk about. It just was like, okay, I got a good, nice, warm hug. Thank you. you um which.Track 5:[32:26] You know what's amazing is there were so many reviews about this album that said it was not cohesive and inconsistent and like what the hell are you talking about and.Track 3:[32:36] Uneven and blah blah.Track 4:[32:37] Blah yeah what.Track 3:[32:38] The hell man agree.Track 4:[32:39] Yeah no that's a reviewer who read that it was you know recorded over many years yeah that's ridiculous like maybe if you gave it one or two listens but even then even the first listen i didn't love it but it sounded like an album yeah Yeah. One more thing about this song though, before, before we move on, I love the middle section. There's like a bridge or maybe even call it a chorus. It only goes to it once the, I had to look, I had to go, I had to laugh. And it's really interesting how they go through it once, then there's that extra bar, like they keep doing, and then they change the chord progression and back off a bit. Like if you listen to the way the, you know, they're the same instruments, but they just back off and the feel changes totally. And it's such a great effect. Rather than ramping up a bridge, they almost like pull back a bit. And that really was unique. And it only happens once. It feels like a chorus to me, but it's right smack dab in the middle of the song. And I think it's two minutes and like 23 seconds or something. And this is definitely one of my favorites.Track 3:[33:43] Yeah, it's a good one. And the next one is a good one as well. It's got to hold the record for the longest title in Gord's solo oeuvre. Kirk mentioned a moment ago that there's a bit of everything on this record. And to me, the beginning of this song, just the very beginning, is shoegazy.Track 5:[34:00] Yes.Track 3:[34:00] Or it goes into a real punk sort of vibe. And it didn't start to break my heart until this afternoon. Justin, what have you got for us?Track 5:[34:09] So the line, we fought like two Irons, really stuck out to me. and it goes with Kirk. I don't know that this was the middle of a divorce. I think Gord is just polyamorous at this point because this project took seven years and in the middle of it, he released the third album, Grand Bounce. So he is just sleeping around. I love the punk, the hard driving, just we're going to beat the fuck out of this song.Track 4:[34:38] My first real positive experience with this song was driving to my show last weekend and it was like i said a nice day i was driving along and to me like i said it's a real good driving album and i was coming up to this i guess it was a school zone but it was a weekend so there's no school and there was a uh a flashing like speed limit sign it was like a happy face and as i'm driving by it's like it turns to a sad face because i guess i was a little bit above the limit i'm not a huge speeder but i found that kind of quite funny especially after the i just just listen to the line what is it um something about driving fast oh yeah drive drive it like we stole it yeah it's a great great line that's right and then later on there's the dishwasher loaded which i love because i i wish i could say that most of my music listening was in the car but i only have about a five minute commute to work so most of my listening is actually doing the dishes and so this is just a great song when you're doing the dishes and and dishwasher loaded it and it really really kind of got you know i.Track 5:[35:40] Had the same experience man that's.Track 4:[35:41] Found it pretty funny and i actually the first time i noticed that lyric i was actually had just put this open i was closing the door of the dishwasher and so it was just it was just perfect it's so funny yeah.Track 5:[35:51] That's amazing oh.Track 4:[35:53] And great harmonies too on the chorus like love those harmonies yeah.Track 6:[35:57] That's one thing you'll notice too when you watch those or or you see them like the the harmony part especially especially after what we had just experienced for the last three albums, you know, with the female voice going back to a male voice backing. I love that element that it brought to it. And I'm just gonna jump into the next song, Budget Shoes. This is one that I think has probably held the number one spot for me. I would say it's not necessarily still there, but it's been there more often than not. And maybe I'm far off on this, but being the American, one of the two Americans that really likes Canadian culture, it brought me back to Kids in the Hall for some reason. In fact, so much so, if you think of the Kids in the Hall intro, I actually looked it up to go hoping it was the sadies like that really would have made my day if it was the sadies that had done that song that's the intro to kids in the hall.Track 4:[39:34] There is there is a connection there and i hope i'm correct here but i believe i read that the dallas good the the younger brother who you know passed away recently who.Track 3:[39:44] Was the drummer.Track 4:[39:44] He he played so so the good family was a was a country family like they had like a family band and and the older brother travis actually played with his band and Dallas being younger he he went more towards punk and I believe it said that his first or one of his first bands was with one of the members of uh Shadowy Men is that the name of the band that does the theme yeah yeah.Track 3:[40:11] Shadowy Men oh.Track 6:[40:12] Wow nice it definitely was reminiscent of that uh the entire song to me is just brilliant and it it gives you I mean it It really just digs deep inside my soul going back to the ethereal. When Gord hits those moments of the desperation vocal that we heard a lot, not only in recording, but live when he was with the hip, that brought such a comfort to me, right? Knowing where the hip is at, knowing where Gord is at, knowing what's coming. Like this is three years prior to his passing. And just so thankful that we get another version of Gord. And that's really what it was to me is we got, we have the hip and we love that. We have these first three albums, but now we have another one. And it was, Justin, you mentioned it in his lyrics. It's like, I'm not trying to confuse anyone here. I got this great band. They've given me this good music and I'm just gonna give it, I'm gonna give it what's coming to me at the moment. so when he does his and i call it a desperation vocal i know exactly what.Track 5:[41:22] You mean when you say it though.Track 3:[41:26] Yeah.Track 5:[41:26] Yep. Yep. So I'm going to ask the Canadians in the room here about budget shoes because I did some research on this as well. And apparently there's a tradition in Canada that finance ministers buy a new pair of shoes before presenting the budget and they wear them on the floor. Or if they're pissed off about it, they don't.Track 4:[41:48] Oh, wow.Track 5:[41:48] And it's this thing that has happened since the 1860s.Track 3:[41:53] Jesus. Do they go bare feet? I mean, listen, I was a political science major, and I've never heard of it before, but that doesn't really mean anything.Track 6:[42:01] As the other American, I agree with what you say full-heartedly. Love it. Love that connection.Track 3:[42:10] Yeah, I think it's great.Track 5:[42:11] It was strange, but interesting. And I don't know if this song is a commentary on politics and that, or if it just works well with... I mean, this song sounds like, you know, we're sleeping in a tent in a winter storm unexpectedly in the middle of the desert, you know, and I've got nice shoes and you don't, you know, and I'm going to keep my feet and you're going to lose them to frostbite. I don't know.Track 4:[42:37] What I was thinking was I was imagining almost like an old Western movie. It's like sweltering hot in the desert. And yeah, they're camping overnight. Night and you know the most iconic thing you'll see in a western is that you know the shot of the cowboy boots and the pan up and and i'm just picturing this you know guy sleeping in his budget you know there's cheap shoes and that's kind of what i do balances on yeah yeah.Track 6:[43:04] Ouch shots fired they're.Track 5:[43:05] A great company and they.Track 6:[43:06] Make a fine shoe thank you we're not sponsored by any of these particular shoe brands yeah i mean budget shoes you talk about the westerns it's almost like a spaghetti western type feel just in that uh the guitar riff as well so.Track 3:[43:26] Oh, that's cool. I felt that, too. I wouldn't have put that together. All right, let's move on. Demand Destruction. Is it just me, Justin, or does this song feel very much like the Tragically Hip? Am I crazy?Track 5:[43:38] No, I don't think you're crazy about that at all. And this song is, I think, Gord kind of putting out his own views. Again, there's a notation at the bottom. The last one, Budget Shoes, was dedicated to Evan S. Connell, who was the author of the book about Custer where the title of The Grand Bounce came from. So that's a continuation. And then this one is dedicated to Dr. Helen Caldicott, who was an Australian physicist and anti-nuclear war advocate. And it just feels like a protest song to me. I really don't have a lot of notes about it. It's just a nice, fun tune. But there's definitely a message in there. And I think it's Gord speaking about, let's not fuck this up. and maybe some reverence for Dr. Caldecott. It says, I'm not a fan, I just like what you do. I don't know. I don't have a whole lot to unpack on this one.Track 3:[44:30] Right. Well, no, I think you unpacked quite a bit. Craig, what have you got for us?Track 4:[44:36] One thing I'll say about this song is I found maybe the snare was a little too biting for me. I found that if you if you were listening quietly it it just jumped right out of the mix to the point where you almost couldn't hear anything else and when you turned it up it just had just a little a tinge too much oh yeah you guys know who who mixed the album yeah so bob rock and i think he did a great job overall but it definitely you know he's known for those big huge drums and i just would have liked a little more balance i thought the snare was just a little peeking out a little bit too much the rest of the album i think it it works but maybe the song is the poppiest.Track 5:[45:17] I think of the of the songs on the album it's certainly.Track 4:[45:20] Radio friendly fairly typical like blues rock sort of yeah um riff at the start yeah.Track 3:[45:25] That's what reminds me it reminds me of something off of road apples you know oh yeah yeah that era.Track 4:[45:31] Yeah great great harmonies again especially in the chorus all.Track 3:[45:34] Right from there we get a change of pace with mandolin and organ off the top of devil enough. Am I right? Was it mandolin Craig?Track 4:[45:44] Um, yeah, I believe so. I need to go back and listen again. Um, yeah, this is the song I referenced earlier that was driving me nuts. Even today I was sitting there tapping my toes, like trying to figure out the time change. And I actually had this like theory about what they were doing with it, you know, how they're getting from one tempo to the next. And then I just realized after a while it's just feel it's all feel. And I won't even get into it, because there are some weird things that happen. And I think it is what Justin mentioned earlier, I think it's just that flexibility of, of like, you know, they're really pushing the tempo, bringing it back quite frequently. And so.Track 4:[46:25] Yeah, if anyone wants to transcribe this drum part for me and send it to me, I would love to see that because I would love to know mathematically how it works, but I'm pretty sure it is just like a feel thing. This was a song that really stuck out to me. I love that time change. Having said all that, it really, the first few times just really struck me. The guitar playing at the end, the sort of Nashville picking at the end is just amazing. There's a few songs that have those great guitar solos. I think often it's Travis, according to the videos I watched, although I believe Dallas will trade off solo sometimes too. There's the line, Streets Ahead, which of course is a song name from Now For Plan A. And I had just actually recently been watching Community. And I'm not sure if you guys know that reference, but there's a, you know, it's like a catchphrase of Chevy Chase's character. And I actually found a, I wondered if it was related and I found an interview where someone asked Gord that question and he's just like, what? He was so like, no, like what are you talking about? Which of course makes sense. I mean, you don't write books. All these songs you're not a prolific writer like gourd if you're if you're.Track 6:[47:36] Spending countless hours.Track 4:[47:39] Binging you know sitcoms with 120 episodes.Track 5:[47:44] Well and gourd gourd's a dan akroyd guy not a chevy chase guy.Track 6:[47:48] Yeah true hey going back to that the ending part craig yes uh you know they almost have a bluegrass feel in some of these instrumental type solos there's There's rock going on against a different instrumentation, which I absolutely love the devil enough to me almost was reminiscent of like your seventies kind of, you know, Barracuda and like the big songs that would have a slow intro and then rock out or go to another slow, but very seventies rock and kind of anthemic type of we're going to switch keys. We're going to switch tempos i very much got that but again going back to the swagger you feel the swagger in in the presentation of the lyrics at least from my perspective with gourd on this loved it loved it.Track 4:[48:43] Yeah there are some um really great songwriting techniques on this album that you can tell you know the sadies are just a pro band i think is it uh one of the guys from blue rodeo i believe was was quoted in the in the barclay book about saying that you know they're the world's greatest rock band and there's the little things like in this song they use the little bars of two to set up you know those changes and just lots of little things like that like an extra bar here an extra bar there it's just some really great little songwriting tricks what did you think justin i.Track 5:[49:14] Just this song you know growing up we only had like 10 or 12 channels on on tv and one of them was tnn the nashville network and so the grand ole opry was was on all the time, because we didn't have a choice. If it wasn't Hockey Night in Canada, it was TNN. And just this song, that run with the picking is really cool. It brought me back to late 80s, early 90s, just watching the hoedown.Track 4:[49:42] Not a country fan, but when I hear a great guitar player like that, though, like a great Nashville player, it really is great. This whole album isn't the type of music I would typically listen to. And I think that's why I gravitate more towards an indie rock feel, like the Battle of the Nudes. But man, this album is really, really solid.Track 6:[50:06] Yeah, it has a good... I mean, I know you guys say you don't like country, and I say it too. But I bet you you'd be surprised about what you do like that's country-esque. And so for me, when I think of country, I get turned away by some of the modern country. although I'm really digging some Chris Stapleton and some of these other guys I'm really digging. But like when I hear country, I think Kenny Rogers, Merle Haggard, I think Willie Nelson, I think, and I think we really do dig, even going back Hank Williams and even a little further, like when the, as you listen to, I love this that we're talking like, oh, we only had 10 channels and whatever else. And I'm going hockey night in Canada and the nashville network you know and throw in a little emma daughter's jug band christmas and that's my childhood and i'm happy and i love all that so i i i get what you're saying but this i mean the sadie's i think alt country i heard earlier from one of you guys that's very much the feel from devil enough you roll into i'm free disarray me justin you you inspired me because i I have the vinyl here with me. And so I quick looked at the bottom and I'm like, okay, I gotta catch this one cause I've missed all the other references that you mentioned. So you got Virginia Woolf, who's listed at the bottom of I'm Free Disarray Me. And when you do your research, you think about stream of consciousness.Track 6:[51:31] And that really, I think, kind of sums up your lyrics in this particular song.Track 6:[51:37] Swagger again it's it's it's it's it's the same but it's not i heard us all say that it's the same but it's not i i i loved where it went with this and it's bringing us down now right because we only have one more song we talked about the track listings and the order and now it's given us getting us i think this is kind of setting us up for saved at least me personally uh what you think craig.Track 4:[52:03] This was the first song that actually popped into my head just out of the blue one morning when i woke up because it took quite a long time for that to happen with this album i was still singing grand bounce songs you know every morning waking up and then one day it was that i was like wow okay and and same one thing i want to mention this is kind of, going off of what you're talking about with vinyl i was listening to this you know doing dishes.Track 4:[52:29] With you know on apple and the amount of times in the last few months of doing this you know this show with you guys listening to music and it glitches for just a second when i'm streaming and it just drives me nuts and so just that was one thing that i just had a note note about that that this album needs to be listened to on cd on on on vinyl anyways that was just a little pet peeve of mine and also the the snare again in this song was just a little a little much for me it was it was it was really up front and i i like loud drums typically in a mix but i just I don't know there there was it's almost like with the snare being that loud I'm missing a bit of the kick drum and speaking of which you guys must have noticed that the the bass players you know playing stand-up I had the thought a few times like I wonder and this is not to take away from what he's doing but I just wonder what it would have sounded like if they if they used an electric bass on this album because I found the bass to be not as prominent as on the last three albums you know there it wasn't sticking i don't think that's just part of the style of this band.Track 6:[53:38] Great i have a question though craig in when i look at the watch the videos oh yeah he has an he has an ampeg like he has a bass amp so he's taking a stand-up bass which traditionally you just mic or go straight into the board and he's he's running it through a traditional rock bass you know pickup bass right in through like the standard road hard ampeg so um so it gives it that good gritty sound but i will agree 100 it's not as prominent and i would like it to be a little bit more only just being a musician but it didn't didn't didn't dissuade me from my love for this album yeah.Track 4:[54:21] Not at all and i think it were like sometimes the best bass players are the ones you don't notice like they're just tight to the to the drummer and that's really all that matters but there was really only a couple times on this album where i where i noticed.Track 6:[54:34] Very accurate Accurate statement.Track 5:[54:36] This, I think, is my MVP. As a kid who was raised on prog, you fall into the song and just let it kind of take over. I don't know. I actually found, weirdly, a karaoke version of this on YouTube.Track 3:[54:52] Really?Track 5:[54:53] An instrumental version of this. No way. And I played the piss out of it just today driving. Driving and uh yeah it's it's really odd that this is the one that's an instrumental track for, yeah but just the phrasing of things lyrically and musically like he's it this doesn't sound like any other song that gourd has has put together as far as i'm concerned i.Track 6:[55:17] Love i love that connection with prog rock justin because you've mentioned that multiple times that that's something you love. And when you said it, I had not placed it until you said it. And I agree with you on that's a great, great, great description of it.Track 5:[55:31] There was a lot of references to the Sadie's covering Pink Floyd in live shows. And I'm like, oh, there it is right there. The song is that.Track 6:[55:42] The next one to the next one to could be, you know, Jim Ladd headset session, listening like with Pink Floyd.Track 3:[55:50] Oh, the next one is gorgeous, I think. It's the first slower tempo song that we have on the record called Saved.Track 5:[58:56] Again, I can't believe that the reviews said this album doesn't make sense because about halfway down, the plane starts to land, right? And every song from halfway on is just you're descending and you land perfectly softly unsaved. And this song also sounds a lot like Coke Machine Glow. And it's just really mellow and it's Gord doing his thing. and i i don't know i love it.Track 6:[59:26] Almost every album i feel like has had a an extended version of coke machine glow track to it i i i love that i i hadn't placed it until you just said that because i felt the same way about some of the other the other albums is there that could be on coke machine glow but you're exactly right and then he continues that theme as it goes almost like the uh like his is the poetry book.Track 3:[59:53] Craig is holding up his notes.Track 4:[59:55] Nobody else can see it. I said the exact same thing. Pattern of Ending solo albums and some hip albums with a track with a much different feel is what I had written.Track 5:[1:00:07] Which goes back to Road Apples.Track 4:[1:00:12] I really love the line the music is so loud that it flaps your pant leg. It reminded me a little bit of Yawning or Snarling. Just the line in that.Track 5:[1:00:23] Thank you. I would hold up my notebook if it wasn't typed out. Because that's exactly what I have to.Track 4:[1:00:30] We are, let's see, as of recording this episode, we are, what time is it there? We're about two and a half hours away from the 10 year anniversary of this album. Of the release of this album.Track 3:[1:00:41] Oh, get the fuck out.Track 4:[1:00:42] Yeah. Wow.Track 3:[1:00:44] Oh, wow.Track 4:[1:00:46] I just had to look it up yesterday. I was like, wow, that's pretty cool.Track 5:[1:00:48] Oh, shit.Track 3:[1:00:48] That is cool. Huh. I normally have them all in my calendar, and I don't have that in my calendar. Huh. Good find. Yeah, it's going to be, yeah.Track 6:[1:01:00] Good find, Craig. Great find.Track 5:[1:01:02] J.D., you have about two and a half hours to make a post.Track 3:[1:01:06] Any more unsaved?Track 5:[1:01:09] I don't know. I didn't pick it apart too much. I loved that imagery of the line, Craig, that you just mentioned. The music is so loud, it flaps your pant leg. And there's a really strange, it's almost not, rhythm to the way that he sings it. It would be really hard to transcribe that onto a, onto a sheet of music.Track 4:[1:01:29] I also enjoyed the, um, the, the, the, they finally played a bit without the drums, you know, like this whole album has been very much like a full band. And I mentioned last week, I believe that one of the strengths of, of country of miracles was that they had so many members that they could all just take a break every once in a while. They didn't feel the need to always fill up every space. This band's the opposite because they're, you know, there's just four of them and they, they, you know, they're very much a typical rock band where everyone's playing all the time and so i actually enjoyed that there was a bit of time at the start of the song without drums no no offense to the drummer um but sometimes you just need a break this.Track 6:[1:02:07] Song to me was the you know that that cup of coffee after dessert or you know the cigarette after sex it was that finisher it was uh it was that we're all in good, good, good company. I love the connection back with Coke Machine Glow. I love the connection back with that changing that ending song. But to me, it was, all right, more so than the others. It was like, okay, here's your big warm hug before whatever comes up next.Track 3:[1:02:39] Oh, I like it. It does feel like a warm hug. It's a very comforting song for me. I don't know why, but it chills me right out. It's a great cigarette after sex. Kirk, I love that. It's really tremendous.Track 5:[1:02:55] It sucks that this album was only a half hour long.Track 3:[1:02:58] I know. It's so strange after The Grand Bounce, which was nearly an hour. But again, these guys are just so efficient and economical.Track 5:[1:03:10] It's one good fast job, baby.Track 3:[1:03:12] That's right.Track 6:[1:03:14] So does- Hey, did you know that that is his second highest played single, or at least versus Spotify when I last checked? Does that not totally blow you away? Like at least if you just look in his Spotify category, I believe it's number two behind like the Chancellor, I think is probably the most sense. But now i'm now i'm gonna look sorry i'm gonna i'm gonna see if i can back my own research.Track 5:[1:03:43] So interestingly i i don't have hard copies of any of these albums so i'm i'm strictly listening on streaming i use the youtube music app i don't really care for the interface on spotify and there is zero existence of this album in that in that space so i had to download band camp and buy the album that way which i was happy to do yeah i love band camp but yeah i had to uh that's the only way I could find this lyrics.Track 6:[1:04:07] All right, gents. I did the research. I was incorrect by two. It's Chancellor, the East wind. Oh, I am lost.Track 4:[1:04:15] That's then one good. Mind blowing.Track 5:[1:04:17] No shit.Track 6:[1:04:18] Number four.Track 4:[1:04:19] Yeah.Track 6:[1:04:20] Like that. It's even in the top five to me over like.Track 4:[1:04:23] You know, it's a great song. These songs that I thought were more well-known. Wow.Track 6:[1:04:29] Thank you.Track 4:[1:04:29] Yeah.Track 6:[1:04:30] It's surprising to me that.Track 3:[1:04:32] Yeah.Track 5:[1:04:33] Well, even, Even the opener on this one, Crater, I mean, it has a great video too.Track 6:[1:04:39] Oh, that's right. That's right. It is a really cool video.Track 4:[1:04:43] So the album art's interesting too. Did you catch that there's the different members of the band on the album? There's probably about these portraits of like, I don't know, 50 people. And if you look carefully, you can find all of the members of the band. I did.Track 6:[1:05:01] I did, absolutely. It's, yeah, on the album.Track 5:[1:05:04] And the artwork and the sound and all that, it kind of reminded me of the Beatles. I don't know why. But there was something about it that was familiar.Track 3:[1:05:16] Beatles-esque.Track 5:[1:05:17] Yeah. Yeah.Track 6:[1:05:20] I could see that. I mean, especially from an artistic standpoint. Yeah. Very much can see that.Track 3:[1:05:26] Yeah.Track 5:[1:05:27] Overall, I was super happy that this was the next thing. And I wish that there had been another one to follow it.Track 3:[1:05:33] So does it stay in your rotation then, Justin?Track 5:[1:05:36] Mm-hmm.Track 3:[1:05:37] Yeah, it does. Craig, how about you?Track 4:[1:05:40] A couple of days ago, I probably would have said maybe not. It's an album I'll definitely pull out here and there. But no, I do think I really am enjoying it lately. And like I said, the turn of the weather really helped. This is, to me, a summer album, not a, I think, come winter, I'll put it away again.Track 5:[1:05:59] End but the i'm sorry but i got it before i forget it right we just had the eclipse as we're recording this and i was stuck in traffic it's a 17 minute commute to get home and it took me 90 minutes so i listened to this album three times on the ride home and it's a great even if you're stopped it's a great album to be in the car.Track 6:[1:06:20] It's going to hit the turntable for me on a fairly regular basis for a while. Like I said, Grand Bounce, I couldn't get it out of my head. And finally, it might even have been an I'm Free Disarray Me, just that very methodical line that came through that turned it for me. Me but i love i i love it absolutely love it in fact i'm i'm probably more excited about digging deeper into the sadies once this whole project is done the sadies and several other canadian bands that i'm not as familiar with that you guys have introduced me to and i'm very thankful for but uh yeah this this one's staying in the rotation if you've got any.Track 3:[1:07:02] Bands that are gore adjacent or canadian indie adjacent uh send them our way discovering downy at gmail.com And we'll be sure to read that email on the air.Track 5:[1:07:18] I will say that as much as I've enjoyed this album, I've also really enjoyed the songs that are not on the album that Gordon and Sadie have played together. The cover of Search and Destroy. Holy shit.Track 3:[1:07:32] Right, you sent that to us a few days ago.Track 5:[1:07:35] That song melted my goddamn face off. It was so good. So good. And it was like 7, 12 in the morning or something. I was like, all right, I'm out of bed now. This is awesome.Track 4:[1:07:45] One of the shows I found online was here in Vancouver at the media club. And I actually remember hearing about it. And I'm just kicking myself that I didn't get to that show. This is like a tiny, tiny, like this is where my original band a number of years ago did our CD release party. And yeah, there's maybe room for 80 to 100 people in there. would have been amazing.Track 3:[1:08:10] Oh damn that.Track 6:[1:08:14] Is definitely i don't have a lot of regrets gentlemen but not seeing any iteration of gourd solo is very much i'm glad video was around because but i would have really really really enjoyed.Track 3:[1:08:28] Seeing that feeling thousand percent live yeah.Track 5:[1:08:32] I go back to that sweaty basement uh in me in massachusetts and like dude i went to those shows all the time and I wasn't there.Track 3:[1:08:39] That's crazy so Justin you've already sort of given this away even though we we you know we tease it throughout the show and typically give it away at the end but we'll start with you and your MVP track.Track 5:[1:08:56] Yeah, it's totally I'm free, disarray me, which took me by surprise, but then it didn't totally. You know, after the way that by, you know, the music that my parents played when I was a kid, this song is just cosmic cowboy, trippy shit.Track 3:[1:09:14] Kirk, how about you?Track 6:[1:09:15] All right. Los Angeles Times.Track 3:[1:09:21] Excellent. I love that pick. I liked your pick too, Justin.Track 5:[1:09:25] That's the hometown.Track 6:[1:09:26] Oh, yeah.Track 5:[1:09:27] That's okay.Track 6:[1:09:28] And it definitely is not one that I would have really settled in on had it not been for our discussion today, honestly. Because almost every song on the album has really fallen into near the top. You know, Conquering Sun, Budget Shoes, I would say, of everything, those definitely hit that number one spot for me multiple times. But Los Angeles Times is the one that just kept coming back, and I just kept feeling, and I kept growing further, enamored with on all fronts. So that's my pick, and I'm sticking to it.Track 3:[1:10:03] Very cool. Craig, you?Track 4:[1:10:06] Yeah, I had a hard time picking a song. And I found, kind of like what Kirk said, there was almost less of a range between the songs I enjoyed and the songs I enjoyed less. They were all in roughly the same region, whereas the other albums, there was some tracks that right away really, really got to another level with me. I think this album maybe doesn't quite have quite the emotion that the first three did, which is usually what hits me when I really love a song. Usually it just grabs me emotionally. And this album didn't have that in the same way. my my go-to song here is is going to be uh it didn't start to break my heart until this afternoon, just just a good good punk rock song yeah just nice just a great yeah great driving tune and.Track 3:[1:11:00] Gets the blood flowing, right? And I agree with you about the previous three records. They're just sort of more raw and improvised feeling.Track 4:[1:11:08] And more range to them, right? This just feels... There was more... Yeah, just... More variety. Yeah, more...Track 3:[1:11:15] Dynamics. Yeah. Yeah.Track 5:[1:11:20] There was a point where critics were really starting to tear Gord and the hip down. Yeah. When this album was coming out. And they were like, all right, we get it. The soup's getting cold. It's the same shit over and over, year after year. The performances are boring. It's not great. And I think, I don't know, but I'm thinking that this album was Gord's big middle finger to those guys. I'm still doing this. He's 50 years old.Track 4:[1:11:49] Can you think of another artist that has done what Gord has done? He's now got three bands that are all so amazing. Yeah, that's right.Track 5:[1:12:01] At the same time.Track 3:[1:12:01] At the same time, yeah, you're right.Track 4:[1:12:03] Yeah, mind-blowing how much high-quality work he put out through his whole career, but especially in this middle chunk here.Track 3:[1:12:12] Well, and if you think about it, this is a perfect segue because beginning in 2012, he started work on the record we're going to talk about next week, which is Secret Path. And that record didn't see the light of day until 2016. 16. So even then with that record, he's assembled the band again, and it's a great band as well. So this guy is just producing at a level presumably around the same time he's doing Luster Parfait. Because he's working with Bob Rock pretty exclusively, right?Track 5:[1:12:49] Right.Track 3:[1:12:50] So, God, just fascinating what we're what we've gotten up to so far i can't wait we are halfway done his records we've got one more studio record and then god damn it three posthumous records uh it's going to be tough to get through those ones guys i know it yep anything else you want to say before we wrap things up i.Track 5:[1:13:15] Don't know i love it man i i love this project i feel like we're a broken record because we're all going to say the same thing and we'd say it every episode But this project has gotten me back into, just like you said, Kirk, discovering new music. Or it's new to me. Right. And I am finding so many new things that I didn't know I didn't know.Track 3:[1:13:35] Right.Track 6:[1:13:37] I'm i have been frightened from the beginning because you know you listen because it's your first time listening to a solo stuff for you know i was frightened every single album that, yeah i was going to be disappointed yeah yep and i just keep finding a new way to be enamored and i don't mind being that easy when it comes to gourd and what's going on uh you know i i we talked about, you know, my, my experience with the hip, you know, having to hear about it from friends and not having that, you know, immediate access to everything. So I'm thoroughly loving the fact that the emotion and the feeling that Gord and the hip, all the musicians he's been involved with on the solo, just keep raising the level. So I'm now just like, I'm, I'm, you know, what I like about this, you guys is you're nervous and worried. Now I'm not nervous and worried. I'm I'm just, I'm excited about listening to what's coming up and I'm so excited.Track 5:[1:14:37] If you, if you enter the, if you enter the room knowing it's going to be a mindfuck when you get there, it's perfect
Amazons Defeated by Kung Fu Master, disguised as a sexy witch. By BradentonLarry - Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Shelonda & Don defeated the Amazon tribal sisters, and gained the release of Toshia. "I don't like this plan, Don," Nicole had said. "I don't want to see any more killing." "Neither do I," Don replied. "We're going to do everything we can to avoid seriously hurting anyone. How much first aid do they teach pre-med students?" [[MORE]] The answer had been not much, but Nicole had been a girl scout and knew some rudiments. So, she was assigned the role of medic for the rescue mission. "There it is!" Don said, pointing ahead to where he could just see the old ruined castle poking up out of the forest. "Let's find someplace to land not too far from it." In another minute, responding to Amy's mental commands, the carpet settled down in a small clearing just a short, wooded distance from the castle's gate. Don, Shelonda and Nicole disembarked – Nicole quite eagerly – and Amy had the carpet carry her back up into the sky. Amy had her instructions. She hadn't liked the thought of being left out of the main action, but had eventually accepted Don's reasoning. At the very least, if Don's plan didn't work, they wouldn't all be captured. With Don taking the lead, the three on the ground set off through the forest toward the castle of the Sisterhood. It was only a short walk before they came to another, much larger, clearing in front of the gate of the castle. The gate itself was very old, mostly of wood and actually in surprisingly good condition. It had two valves, and the one on the right was standing open. Two women were there, apparently on guard, though they had placed their spears against the wall and were practicing what looked like crude judo take-downs. Don and the others got half way across the clearing to them before either of them noticed. "Hey! Who the hell are you?" said one, a tall woman with short, jet-black hair. To her credit, her partner, a shorter blonde with longer hair, immediately went to grab both spears and took the opportunity to give a high-pitched whistle through the open gate. "I'm Don, and this is my student Shelonda and our medical assistant Nicole," Don said amiably as he continued to approach the castle. "Medical assistant?" the guard asked as her companion brought her spear. "To help if anyone gets injured." "OK, that's far enough," the guard said as she leveled her spear at Don's chest, "or you're going to get injured permanently." Don frowned a little at that. He actually suspected that the XYZ would help his, or anyone's, body repair any injury short of death, but he didn't bother to explain this to the dark-haired woman. Instead he said, "We're here to collect our friend, who we believe has been a guest of the Sisterhood for the last few days." "Oh you are, are you?" said a voice from above the gate. Don looked up to see a beautiful woman with long black hair spilling over her shoulders and her armor standing on the battlements over the gate. She certainly seemed to have the regal bearing that would go along with leading the Sisterhood. He decided at that moment that this woman would respond better to a particular approach – one of individual dominance. "I am," Don nodded. "She became separated from us, and has been here. I would be grateful if you returned her." "And if I don't?" asked the woman, confirming Don's guess as to her role in the Sisterhood. "Then I'll have to make you," Don smiled. The woman laughed derisively, and then said, "Kill him, and take the women." Without hesitation, the two guards drew back to thrust at Don with their spears. Before they could attack though, his staff came up and spun around in a clean arc through the place where the black-haired one's head had been, carrying her down into a crumpled heap on the ground where she lay unconscious. Immediately, Don reversed the momentum of his staff, batting the blonde's spear aside, and then brought the other end of the staff around to strike the woman's knee hard enough to buckle her leg painfully in the wrong direction. She cried out in pain before Don stretched her on the ground with a blow to the head. The entire exchange had taken less than three seconds. Don held up his left hand to the half dozen warrior women who had by now come through the gate and who were ready to charge him. "We do not want to fight the Sisterhood," he said in a loud, calm voice. "We only want our friend, Toshia, who is here in your castle. Give her to us and Nicole here will tend to these good women and we will be on our way. If you do not give her to us, though, I must challenge your leader to personal combat." "We do not stoop to fight with men," one of the women in front of Don sneered. She was a big redhead with a spray of freckles across her face. "That sounds like cowardice to me," Don smiled back at her. "Take them down," the woman on the wall ordered. At once, the six women, led by the freckled redhead, charged Don and the girls. Don's hypothesis was that the XYZ was supercharging more than just their sex drives, and that if he and Shelonda deliberately sought to direct their energies into good kung fu they would be nearly unstoppable fighting machines. Moreover, he had repeatedly noticed the flexible nature of Eros, in that what a focused mind wanted often made itself available. Don and Shelonda were now throwing themselves into the fray, letting the XYZ course through their veins and expecting the world to bend itself to their will. They leapt higher, dodged faster, and hit harder than seemed humanly possible. In addition, they had a particular advantage thanks to the Wizard; their staffs had been enchanted. Though they were still the light, flexible staffs Don and Shelonda had brought from the Manor, they were now, for all intents and purposes, unbreakable, and struck with a force much greater than normal. There were additional abilities as well, but they were trying to hold back on those, both to keep at least one of them in reserve as a surprise and because they really didn't want to severely injure anyone. It only took a minute or so before all six of the sisters were lying on the ground around Don and Shelonda, either unconscious or groaning in pain. Nicole quickly began moving about them, checking for broken bones and beginning to bandage ankles and knees. "So," Don called to the rest of the Sisterhood, who by now were gathered outside the gate or along the walls, "you will not stoop to fight a man, but you will stoop to attacking us three to one. That's very brave. I'm quite impressed." "I'll take you one-on-one, little man," said a muscular woman with short brown hair. "When I'm done with you, I'll fuck your ass with that staff of yours." "Always the ass, eh, Wanda?" said a woman from the crowd. Wanda laughed and stepped forward hefting a good sized battle axe in her strong hands. Don smiled at her, "If you're nice, maybe I'll fuck your ass with my 'staff' before I'm done with you." The women seemed to like this and laughed at and with Wanda. Though she didn't really seem to mind the teasing, Wanda chose this moment to charge Don. It was a clumsy attack, and Don had no trouble slipping out of the way. His staff flew around and smacked Wanda hard on the butt. He thought the force of her charge would require a few more steps before she could turn, but Wanda surprised him by spinning tightly and swinging her axe across at his mid-section. Don sprang back in time, but only just. With impressive speed, she changed the direction of the axe, swept it up and then arcing down at Don's head. Rather than dodging though, Don stepped in and threw his staff up in both hands, to catch the axe haft as it came down. Neither staff nor axe gave way, as Don expected, though Wanda was surprised that the axe hadn't continued right through the apparently more flimsy staff. Don took advantage of her surprise by kicking her very hard in the crotch. Though this didn't have exactly the same effect it might have on a male, it still hurt, and Wanda winced and pulled back. Don pressed the attack, spinning his staff in a withering barrage of strikes aimed at Wanda's head. While she was able to successfully block each strike, Don was able to throw her off balance enough that he was able to slip in close and punch her sharply in the gut. With a loud "Oof!" Wanda doubled over, leaving herself open to a decisive rap on the skull that laid her out on the ground. There was a small burst of applause, abruptly cut off, as Don turned to look over the gathered sisters with a cheerful yet derisive smile. He was less astounded by his speed and strength than he was by his endurance; he was barely breathing hard. "Anyone else want to do your leader's fighting for her?" "You're pretty good with that stick," said a beautiful, tall blonde wearing her hair in braids, as she stepped forward. She was wearing a blue sleeveless tunic hanging down almost to her knees and cinched at the waist, leather wrist bands and sandals laced up the length of her calves. She had all the beauty of Nordic women and a muscular build that indicated both strength and speed. She also seemed to be smiling at Don with genuine good nature. She asked, "Can you measure up without a weapon?" Don nodded and said, "Let's find out." He tossed his staff to Shelonda and bowed to the blonde, adding, "I'm Don." "Brigit," she nodded. Don was acutely aware of the fact that he had just given any attentive spectators a good demonstration of his basic fighting style. This gave Brigit a possible advantage. She certainly had the fire of intelligence burning in her eyes, so Don assumed she had an actual advantage. As a result of these thoughts he did not rush in to attack her, though a fast step in and side-kick was usually a good move in this kind of situation. He relaxed his shoulders, slowed his breathing, and waited for Brigit to make the first move. Brigit eyed Don calmly as she began to circle him. He noted that she had her hands raised and open, suggesting that she might be a grappler. Though she was ordinarily someone he might enjoy grappling, Don had little taste for wrestling as a form of combat. He was out-massed by the big woman; speed, agility and determination were his assets, two-thirds of which would be sacrificed in a clinch. He turned as she moved, eventually turning his back on the bulk of the Sisterhood. Don actually thought they were too caught up in the fun of watching the fight to actually interfere, and he was sure Shelonda would alert him if someone made an unsporting move. Rather than attack him, the sisters were taunting both Brigit and him, telling them to get on with it. Finally, Brigit did just that, taking a few quick steps in Don's direction, but he only danced back laughing. She came in again, this time faster and swinging her right fist in a roundhouse. Don had bounced back, though, and to his left. Before she could readjust, he landed two quick blows on her right side. It felt like he'd punched a wall. Brigit rounded on him, but he had already skipped back out of the way. Her smile suggested that his punches hadn't made much of an impression. Don didn't mind that; he was still sizing her up. She came in fast again, but Don could tell she was a bit hesitant; expecting him to evade her she was holding back. Don responded by closing the distance between them. He blocked the blow she aimed at the left side of his head with his forearm and simultaneously punched straight ahead at her nose. There was a satisfying crunching sound as his fist connected. Don didn't leave his fist out there long, but snapped it back in time to block the punch she threw at the right side of his head. If he'd been slower, Brigit's right-left combination would certainly have knocked him senseless; the woman was certainly powerful. He brought his knee up and quickly snapped his heel into Brigit's gut, pushing the two of them apart again. Brigit's nose was bleeding profusely, and she wasn't smiling any more. Don had to admit that this bout wasn't turning out as playfully as he'd hoped. He thought he'd give the sister a moment to wipe some of the blood off her face, but she came at him again. This time, she tried to close faster and punch straight at him. Don dropped low, under her reach and hit her in the side again, this time much harder. They passed each other and turned, but Brigit took the opportunity to swing her fist back-handed at Don's head. He only pulled back far enough to take the blow on his cheek. The force of the impact knocked him to the side a bit and he tasted his own blood. Brigit came at him quickly, and Don had to backpedal and block furiously to avoid getting seriously hurt. Finally he was able to strike upward with the heel of his hand at Brigit's chin. Her head snapped back and she stumbled backward. Don sprang forward, taking two steps and then was high in the air, his foot snapped around with blinding speed and Brigit's head twisted to the side. Don and Brigit landed on the ground at the same time, he lightly on his feet and she heavily on her back. As the crowd of women cheered in spite of themselves, Don knelt quickly to make sure that Brigit was still breathing. Nicole hurried up to check as well. Before they could say a word to each other, Brigit opened her eyes and said, "Damn! That was fast." Don smiled down at her, touched his cheek which was already red and starting to swell, and said, "It was an honor, ma'am." "Next time, I'm going to kick your ass, you know." "I'll look forward to it," he grinned. "Enough!" a familiar voice barked over the hubbub at the gate. Don looked up to see that the beautiful sister who had been talking to him from the wall had come down to the gate. Since she was smart enough to lead this group of strong-willed women, Don figured she must realize her predicament. If she had the other women attack Don she would appear weak, even if they succeeded in defeating Shelonda and him, which some of them must now be thinking was no sure thing. If she handed over Toshia she would appear weak. If she just shut the gates on them and let them go away she would appear weak. In fact, if she did anything other than fight him she would appear weak and her authority would be undermined. Bullies were so easy to manipulate, Don thought. Of course, she must now see that there was a very good chance that she would be beaten by Don, which would be no less a disaster, at least from her perspective. She came out in front of the small crowd of women, wearing a metallic breast plate that still managed to show off some cleavage, a skirt of chainmail, metal greaves and bracers. Her midriff was impractically bare, though Don certainly didn't mind that. Her jet black hair had now been pulled back into a long ponytail. Don thought she was staggeringly beautiful, and the haughty attitude only made her more appealing for some reason. In her hand was a gleaming long sword in particularly good condition. "You fight well for a man," she sneered. Don, who had stood up, bowed a little in acknowledgement. "I give you the opportunity to go in peace." "We will gladly do so if you return our friend to us," Don answered. "We will not give you what is rightfully ours." "Rightfully yours?" Nicole interjected indignantly. "Hush," Don said quietly. Then, back to the leader of the Sisterhood, "We will not leave without her." "Very well," she nodded. "I will make you submit to me, or you will die." "Or you will submit to me," Don smiled easily. "I do not submit to men," she spat. "Not to men, perhaps, but you will to me." She scowled at him angrily, obviously unused to such impertinence. Finally she said, "I will not fight you here; the ground is littered with your sparring partners. Come inside and fight me in our courtyard. No one but me will harm you." Don nodded his acceptance, and turned to take his staff back from Shelonda, who took the opportunity to say, "I don't know, Don, she looks mean." "Yeah, she does, doesn't she?" he grinned. As the three of them approached the gate the sisters made way for them, and Nicole said, "Just remember, I don't have any bandages big enough for sword wounds." They were led to an open area inside the castle where the sisters obviously worked out and practiced with their weapons. Some of the sisters and some smaller, obviously less assertive women quickly dragged various bags and targets out of the way, clearing the space for the impending duel. The other sisters climbed up on ledges and walls around the courtyard to make sure they had a good view. Don noticed that Brigit and Wanda were able to come in and take their places on a crumbled section of wall. There were a number of doorways leading into the courtyard, and, opposite the point where they'd entered, a set of broad stone stairs led to another open area, where a bunch of chairs were arranged. As soon as everything had been cleared from the area sufficiently, the leader of the sisters took her place near the center of the courtyard, and said, "If you need a sword, Brigit can lend you hers." "No, that's alright; I wouldn't want to take a chance on cutting that beautiful body of yours," Don smiled easily, as if he was flirting with someone at the local coffee shop. "I assure you I have no such reservations about cutting yours." "I think that's a lie... What's your name, by the way?" Don began to slowly walk toward her across the open ground, his staff in his right hand. "Daphne," she snapped. "What do you mean 'you think that's a lie'?" "Well, you might just be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure you don't really want to hurt me." "Oh," she laughed, "you're quite wrong." Don shook his head a little, and said, "No, I don't think I am. I think you're starting to think it would be nice if I beat you and carried you off somewhere and ravished you." "How dare you!" "I'll bet it's been a very long time since you were well and properly ravished." "What in the world makes you think I'd have the slightest interest in being ravished by anyone like you?" "The fact that you've let me get this close to you," Don smiled. He was only a foot away from her. Close enough to see her blue eyes quite clearly enough to read the surprise and then anger in them. "You bastard!" she hissed and leapt back, simultaneously bringing her sword up and around in a blinding arc. Don laughed as he skipped back, temporarily out of range. Daphne followed though, spinning her sword in a furiously fast series of arcs in front of her. "That's fancy," Don nodded, "but I can do it too." He began to spin his staff in a figure-eight motion covering his front and sides. Snarling, Daphne leapt in and swung, counting on her steel blade to cut or bash its way through Don's screen. Instead the sword glanced off, and Don effortlessly reversed the staff's direction to hit Daphne's exposed side. As before, the staff's enchantments imparted greater force than the momentum Don provided would indicate. Cursing under her breath, Daphne snapped her blade around in an arc aimed directly at Don's head. Twisting quickly, Don brought his much lighter weapon up in time to block the strike, catching the blade in the middle of the staff between Don's hands. There was the briefest pause when it was clear to Daphne that her sword should have broken the staff. Don smiled and said, "Yeah, that's not going to happen, my dear." "Is your head unbreakable?" she asked, and then quickly snapped her blade around, over her head, to slash at Don from the opposite side. Don blocked this easily, though the edge of her sword was only inches from his scalp. Apparently unconcerned, Don let Daphne wear herself out with a series of strong, fast cuts that he blocked almost casually. When it seemed that she might be slowing down, but before she could change her tactics on her own, Don changed his. He dropped low, into a proper low stance, letting her sword whistle by high over his head, and drove the end of his staff hard into Daphne's belly. He followed this by sweeping the staff at her shapely legs. He managed to catch one and threw it out from under her. Off balance from this double assault, Daphne stumbled backward. Don pursued her, pressing his advantage. It was Daphne's turn to retreat and parry. Three times Don managed to hit her, once more in the gut, once hard across the arm, leaving a bright red mark, and once a glancing blow to the head, which left a slight gash and a smear of blood. This last hit seemed to irritate Daphne more than the others and she launched into another enthusiastic offensive, which was actually rather successful. She managed to leave a shallow cut along Don's left shoulder and actually achieved a solid hit on Don's right shin, which would have crippled him if he hadn't been wearing his shin guards, fresh from the Wizard's wardrobe. Pausing slightly in surprise or anger, Daphne let Don get close enough that he struck out with the heel of his hand, hitting her hard in the center of her chest just above her chest plate where it showed off her cleavage. Daphne gasped and stumbled back again, this time backing up until she tripped a bit on the steps at her back. To her credit, Daphne recovered quickly, stepped up on the stairs, and had her sword at the ready in the second it took Don to launch his next offensive. He drove her up the stairs until she was on the level with the chairs. He heard the sisters clamoring behind him to keep the fight in view. There was a brief exchange during which the tip of Daphne's sword scratched over the surface of Don's chest armor, Don's staff cracked Daphne's right thigh hard enough to make her cry out and then to favor that leg, and a sword blow which was deflected by Don's bracer scored a bloody wound on the back of his left forearm. Don seemed not to notice the two wounds he had sustained, and continued to drive Daphne back toward the chairs behind her. When she came up against one she had to devote a minute bit of attention to keeping her balance and maneuvering around these obstacles, and this minor distraction provided Don with the chance to strike her right wrist hard enough to make her drop her sword. As the blade clattered to the stone floor, Don dropped his staff, and closed in. Kicking the chair behind her away, Daphne was just barely able to twist aside to avoid the kick Don aimed at her midsection. She got her hands and guard up fast enough to deflect the series of blows he aimed at her head, and then gave him a fast jab which connected with his brow just above his left eye. Moving in, pushing her back further, Don ignored the blood that ran down past his eye, and threw a furious combination of punches and knee strikes at Daphne. Then, suddenly, Daphne was falling backward into a big hole in the floor that Don had only barely noticed. A bit surprised, he still managed to catch her right wrist, but, rather than allowing him to catch her fall, this only meant that he was pulled down with her. Together they landed on what seemed to be a very large, thick mattress. Don landed on top of Daphne, though he was able to brace himself on impact so that he didn't crush her too much. There was a moment when he was able to take in the surroundings – there were bars around the mattress, surprised, naked men looking in at them from the other side, a battered old mirror, and apparently freshly laundered red sheets – before Daphne began to struggle to push him off her. Don was done playing with her, though. He caught her beautiful throat in his left hand and squeezed just a little. Looking down into her livid face, he smiled and said, "Now, that's enough. I won and you know it." Daphne spat at him, and he tightened his grip a bit. Don shoved his leg between hers and used his position and leverage to push her strong thighs apart. Reaching down with his right hand, he pushed his palm up along the inside of her leg, under her chainmail skirt. Sure enough, when he got there, he found her already very wet. Don chuckled a little and a drop of blood from his forehead dripped onto her cheek. As he stroked her moist lips, she continued to struggle but not very convincingly – at least not to Don or to her. He smiled and asked, "Still going to say you're not interested?" "I goddamn hate you!" she insisted. Then Don pushed his fingers up inside her and she groaned a little in the bottom of her throat. "I don't think that's the same thing," Don smirked as he began to work his fingers in and out of her, cupping his hand over her sex, palm rubbing against her clit. He was aware that the men were watching them and that the sisters had gathered around the opening through which Don and Daphne had fallen. What they saw was a combination of Don pinning Daphne to the mattress while he roughly handled her and Daphne sort of struggling while clearly responding to his touch on her. "You've fucking ruined everything, you bastard," she breathed through clenched teeth. "Do you want me to stop?" "Would you stop if I said yes?" she scowled. "No." Daphne closed her eyes again and let a tremor of pleasure pass over her. So quietly that only Don could hear her, she said, "Good." Don pushed his thigh up between her legs, taking the place of his hand against her crotch. As he fumbled at his pants to push them and his cup down to free his already half hard cock, Don leaned down and kissed Daphne. Shocked, she first let him kiss her, then she began to respond, and then she remembered herself and bit at his lip, drawing a bit more blood. Don just laughed and shoved her back into the mattress with the hand around her throat. He knew full well that he wasn't exerting anywhere near enough force to actually hold her down if she really wanted to get out from under him. Then, using his legs and his right hand, Don shoved Daphne's legs apart and settled between them. He shoved her metal skirt up, took his now very hard cock in hand and pushed it down between her legs. Don felt her warm, wet lips embracing his head and then he pushed himself slowly into her. As he filled her tight pussy, he leaned down and said, "You're mine now, Daphne." "I still hate you," she growled even as she was reaching down to grab his ass and pull him into her. "Say it," he said. "I'm yours now," she breathed, "you bastard." Laughing, Don shoved in the rest of the way, feeling his head hitting her cervix. He rocked there for a moment inside her and pressed against her, before pulling almost all the way out and then driving in again. After several such long, deep thrusts, he felt her hand slipping around his neck and then holding the back of his head. Daphne pulled him down to her and kissed him, not grudgingly but passionately, hungrily. They were kissing and biting at each other as his cock slipped in and out of her fiery pussy. Don maintained this steady, slow, deep fucking until he felt Daphne clenching and squeezing on him, gasping around his tongue and lips as she came long and hard. Don pulled back a bit, looking down at her and asked, "Who else has ever beaten you?" "No one," she answered proudly. Don began to fuck in and out of her again, and said, "So there's no reason you should ever bow down to anyone but me, is there?" She smiled up at him, and for the first time the smile seemed completely without malice, "No, there certainly isn't." "I'm glad we had this little chat," he chuckled and began to pump in and out of her with increased vigor. Daphne wrapped her long, strong legs around him and pulled him in closer. Don commenced fucking her hard and fast. He had promised her ravishment and that's what he was delivering. Claiming her body as the rightful prize in their fight, Don took her as his own, pushing himself into her with all the energy he had used to best her in combat. Daphne now gave no appearance of anything but enthusiastic participation. No one watching could have any doubt that she was enjoying every moment of the fucking Don was giving her. When she cried out with her second orgasm, Don felt his own spilling over. He thrust deep into her and filled her with his cum, shuddering and trembling as he spewed his seed deep inside her, claiming her in as intimate a way as he could think of. When Don finally stopped coming, and had caught his breath, he began to look around a bit for the first time since he had begun taking Daphne. Before he could get a good look, though, she pulled his head down and gave him a brief, passionate kiss. When he pulled back to smile down at her, she whispered, "Thank you." "My pleasure," Don smiled warmly at her. For a fleeting moment, he thought it would be fun to stay here with this Amazon queen and rule this little corner of the forest. Then he remembered what he could never fully forget – the need to find Toshia. Withdrawing from Daphne's warm, wet embrace, Don sat back on his haunches. A burst of applause from the men on the other side of the bars around them surprised him. His first instinct was to grin and bow, but he recalled the dynamic he had no interest in undermining and scowled at the men imperiously, and said in a commanding voice, "Don't think any of you have earned the right to disrespect this woman, your mistress." The applause died off immediately. Minotaur Encounters Don stood up, tucked himself back into his pants, and rearranged his clothing. Only now, seeing Daphne's own disheveled and battered state, did he remember that he was covered in sweat and blood. He was about to ask how they were supposed to get out of this room, when a rope ladder was dropped down from the open ceiling. When they climbed up to rejoin Shelonda, Nicole and the sisters, Don was unsurprised to see that the women were succumbing to the tendency to friskiness that ruled this world. Women were making out and fondling each other all over the place. None of it was particularly intense, though, and the reemergence of Don and Daphne was noticed at once. Very quickly all the playing ceased, and the sisters disentangled themselves. Brigit, her face still bloody from her nose, came forward, nodded to them and promptly dropped to one knee, bowing her head. Not quite at once, and sometimes a bit grudgingly, the rest of the Sisterhood took a knee around Don. Only Daphne, Nicole and Shelonda didn't explicitly kneel to his authority. "You honor me by your submission, sisters," Don said in a loud voice. "You have fought well and there is no shame in this defeat." Shelonda stepped up and handed him his staff. Don smiled at her and then turned to Daphne and said simply, "Our friend." Daphne nodded and said to Brigit, "Go fetch the pup." Brigit got up at once and went, while Don had to suppress a smirk and a chuckle. He tried to be serious as he asked Daphne, "The pup?" Daphne nodded, "That must be your friend. We didn't bother asking her name. You have to earn your place here, and she needed to be ... house broken." Don couldn't help laughing at this. Then he asked, "So, how's that going for you?" Daphne smiled and began to answer when Brigit came back much sooner than expected. The blonde was followed by a naked waif of a brunette who seemed rather distraught. Brigit didn't say anything until she came close enough to Don and Daphne that what she said wouldn't be overheard by more than a few people. Then she whispered, "She seems to have run away." "Run away?" Daphne seemed confused at the very possibility. "This girl was coming to find me," Brigit explained. "Apparently .Toshia climbed out a window some time before Don arrived." Don smiled broadly. I should have realized Toshia wouldn't need to be rescued. Daphne saw his smile and said, "There is reason for concern. Your friend is no fighter and there is some danger in the woods." "What kind of danger?" Nicole asked. Daphne didn't answer immediately, but said to Brigit, "Get everyone who isn't injured organized into search parties." Then, once Brigit had nodded and turned away, Daphne said to Don and the others, "There is a dangerous creature that lives in the forest. We call it the Bull." Chapter 13 The Bull: Toshia has charms to soothe the savage beast. Toshia had almost no experience with large animals. She hadn't grown up on a farm or anything. All she could think was that she shouldn't make any aggressive or fast moves. She was glad she didn't have a red cape or anything, but then realized that she didn't even know if that made any sense. Maybe bulls just had poor vision so bullfighters used the bright color to draw their attention. Of course, it was likely that none of this really mattered, since, clearly, this was no ordinary bull. Sure, it had the head of a dark brown bull, with large, dangerous looking horns. Its big dark eyes were watching Toshia carefully. It had a thick bovine neck, covered with proper bull fur... or was it hair on cows? At the shoulders though, everything changed. From there on down, well, until the thighs, the Bull had the body of a big, muscular man, also dark brown, though hairier than she had ever seen a black man's body. His thighs started out human, but transitioned strangely into the legs of a sturdy bull, complete with hooves. How he managed to balance effectively on those feet was a puzzle she set aside for the moment. Toshia held still as the Bull, or, more properly, the Minotaur, took a few steps toward her, moving further into the sunlit clearing. Toshia was not surprised to see that it had a large cock between its legs. She guessed that the Minotaur was two meters tall at the shoulder, but couldn't work out exactly how tall it was altogether, counting the head and horns, particularly since the broad neck bent forward. It had very broad shoulders and superb musculature to support that heavy cranium and those big horns. It looked at her carefully, perhaps wondering why she didn't run off. Toshia was wondering that herself. As it looked at her, its hand moved to its cock. Toshia's eyes followed the motion, and noticed that he was getting hard looking at her naked body. She caught herself smiling at the thought, and wondered if there were any she-Minotaurs in the neighborhood. Maybe that's why he's got a bad reputation, she thought. She decided to try communicating with him. In her sweetest voice she said, "Have you been chasing the girls with that big cock of yours?" The Minotaur blew a little air out of its nose, as if it was laughing, and then Toshia was sure he nodded his big head a little. She decided, or decided to assume, he wasn't going to charge her and kill her, so she stood up. She considered the creature's now hard sex. It was as thick as the Player's, but not quite as long. The sight of it was already making Toshia's pussy wet. "I'm not going to run away," she said. The Minotaur cocked his head to the side, as if he was trying to work out what Toshia was up to. Moving slowly and carefully, Toshia stepped across the little stream and approached the big male, who towered over her. She found herself unmistakably aroused at the Minotaur's undeniably masculine physique and generous equipment. After her time with the satyrs she was well past thinking of these human-animal hybrids from classical mythology as being too alien for sexual congress. In spite of Nina's concerns he didn't seem in the slightest bit like a predator in any meaningful sense. He looked down at her with those deep brown eyes, and Toshia tried to imagine what he was thinking. If he's like everything else around here, she thought, the XYZ has him completely horny. "What about it, big fella," she said in her soft voice, "have all the girls been too afraid of you to help you out with that?" The Minotaur snorted what she took to be affirmation. Toshia reached out and ran her hand lightly over his chest. The hair was surprisingly soft, and his muscles were hard under his flesh. She moved her hand up to caress the sinews of his big neck, then down along his firm bicep. When she reached his big hand, she lifted it, a little surprised at how heavy it was. Toshia brought it up to her face and brushed her cheek against the furry back of the hand, and then placed it on naked breast. The Minotaur breathed in and began to caress her with a surprisingly gentle touch. Toshia had been a bit worried that he would be too rough and strong for her, but he seemed quite capable of controlling himself, at least for now. As her body quickened under the bull-man's touch, Toshia reached out and up to trace her fingertips over the end of his large prick. Due to his greater height, the base was as high as her upper belly, and the length put the head about level with her collarbone. She bent her head down and kissed the tip of it. She reached up with her other hand and began to move both hands up and down his length. She couldn't get her fingers around it entirely, but she did her best. In any case, she loved having the hard shaft of flesh in her grasp. Toshia began to kiss the head repeatedly, and then opened her mouth wide to get it past her lips. She bobbed her head a bit on him, enjoying having the meaty organ filling her mouth. Given her new-found mission to see how much she could do with her body, Toshia was quite determined to get this beautiful thing inside her. Her hands moved down to caress his big, full balls as she ran her tongue over his cockhead's slit. She found some salty-sweet precum there and smiled happily up at those big brown eyes. "It sure is big," she said, "and so hard. Do you want to fuck me with it?" The nod was unmistakable this time. Toshia laughed and said, "Good, but you have to promise to be gentle with me. You can do that, can't you?" He nodded again. "OK, but how are we going to do this?" Toshia looked around the clearing. There was a low rise that looked like it might be of use, but Toshia thought the best option was probably the simplest. She looked around for something she could stand on. She saw a good sized rock near the stream and said, "Can you pick that up and put it over there near that tree?" The Minotaur snorted, almost derisively, and quickly moved over and picked up the big rock as if it was a big bag of groceries. He took it over to where Toshia stood pointing. "Put it right here," she said. When it was in place, she stood on it, facing the tree. She was about a foot higher now. Toshia leaned forward, bracing her hands on the sturdy tree trunk. The rock was big enough that she could spread her feet out on it some, which she then did. Toshia looked over her shoulder and said, "How's that?" As if he couldn't believe his luck, the Minotaur carefully reached out to touch Toshia's naked butt. When she didn't scream or run away, he moved in closer, and she felt his thick cock against the crack between her cheeks. Toshia pushed back against him, looked over her shoulder and said, "Well, don't keep a girl waiting, big fella." There was another low bovine snort, and then she felt him pushing himself down between her legs. He must be bending his knees to get the angle right, she thought, and then the big, fat head was pressed against her eager and very wet lips. Then he was pushing into her, and she felt like it was too much for her to take, but only for a moment. Then all Toshia could think was how good it felt to have her pussy filled with that thick cock! She pushed back against him, making the Minotaur completely fill her. "God, that's good!" she exclaimed. His big, broad hands grasped her around the waist, almost closing around her, and he began to work in and out of her. "Yes, that feels so good!" Toshia almost yelled. "Fuck me!" The Minotaur was soon grunting as his massive phallus plundered Toshia's tight, wet pussy. She felt his hot breath on the top of her head. For a moment Toshia imagined the scene as if someone else were seeing it -- her tiny body being fucked by this huge thing with a bull's head. She would have reached down to play with her clit, but she needed to keep both hands on the tree to keep her balance. She wished there were someone there to see this preposterous and incredibly hot scene. "Now that looks like fun!" said a familiar voice from off to Toshia's left. Toshia looked and was completely surprised to see Amy standing in the clearing watching her and the Bull. She was wearing a cute khaki explorer's outfit, with a buttoned short sleeve shirt and cargo shorts. She was even wearing hiking boots. There were a lot of things crowding around in Toshia's mind, none of which were adequate to the occasion of Amy's sudden appearance. At the forefront, though, was Oh good! He didn't get scared off. He's still fucking me. So, Toshia decided to go with that thought and respond directly to what Amy had said. "Oh yeah, it is!" she grinned. "Are you just going to stand there and watch?" "That doesn't sound like me, does it?" Amy laughed and quickly began to shed her clothes. Toshia turned her attention back to the vigorous fucking she was getting, and pushed herself back on the Minotaur's stiff prick. She found herself eager to feel him filling her with his cum. Then she felt Amy's hands on her body. The sexy blonde had stripped and was now between Toshia and the tree trunk, kissing Toshia's breasts. Amy's fingers moved down along Toshia's belly, dancing lightly over the pink and red scrapes from Toshia's descent from the trees, and quickly began to play with her clit. In mere moments, Toshia was coming, crying out and shaking as waves of ecstasy washed over her. As she came, she continued to push back against the Minotaur's hard body. Then, when she was coming down, she felt that beautiful cock inside her swelling even more and then it was pumping hot, sweet cum up inside her. "Oh god, yes, yes," Toshia moaned and then began to come again. She sagged between Amy and her Minotaur lover, tears running down her cheeks and a happy grin plastered on her face. "Wow," Amy breathed as she hugged Toshia's naked and sweaty body to her full breast. "Can I have a turn?" Toshia laughed and said, "I'm sure he'd like that." She looked over her shoulder, saying, "How about it, big fella, do you want to fuck my pretty friend here?" The large, horned head nodded emphatically. The Minotaur immediately pulled out of Toshia with an audible sucking sound. "Hey, hey!" Toshia cried. "Take it easy there! We're not going to run away on you, and it's just rude to abandon a girl so abruptly." The Minotaur made some almost articulate sounds that Toshia chose to interpret as an apology. Amy was helping Toshia keep her balance as she stepped off the fucking-stone, when Toshia saw that there was what looked like a fancy, large area rug in the clearing, with what looked like a back pack or satchel on it. She went ahead and asked, "What's that?" "Oh, that's the flying carpet," Amy said. "The Wizard lent it to us so we could come rescue you." "Um, okay. Where's everyone else, then?" "They're at the castle. Don's fighting the sisters -- that's the right word, right? Don's fighting them to make them release you," Amy explained. Toshia laughed, "Of course he is." She was suddenly both worried about Don's safety and charmed by his foolhardy attempt to be the dashing hero. A number of ideas suggested themselves to her in fairly quick succession, but the one that seemed most pertinent was that there was pleasure to be attended to here in the forest. "Can you make that thing hover in place?" When Amy answered that she was pretty sure she could, Toshia gave her directions and soon the carpet was floating at just the right height and Amy was lying on her back upon it, with her butt on the edge and her legs spread. Toshia, still standing on the ground, leaned in and ran her tongue over Amy's exposed pussy. "Mmm, delicious," Toshia pronounced, "and already very wet. Want me to go down on you, or have our friend fuck you?" "Oh, can't I have both?" Amy asked. She was already running her hands over her tits, squeezing and pulling at her hard nipples. "Can you wait, boy?" Toshia asked over her shoulder with a smile. She took the Minotaur's snort as a "yes" and promptly bent back down to run her tongue up between Amy's moist lips, scooping up the sweet nectar with the end of her tongue. "Oh, that feels so good," Amy murmured. Toshia lapped her tongue over Amy's clit, making the woman shudder and whimper. Toshia began to lick at Amy's clit while moving her hand up so that she could push two, then three fingers up inside her pussy. Knowing that the Minotaur's cock was easily as big around as her hand when it was squeezed together, Toshia decided Amy could do with the full treatment. Toshia kept licking Amy's clit as she worked her fourth finger into her wet and grasping pussy. Amy gasped and shuddered, but relaxed her vagina to accept the extra intrusion, and even pushed back, encouraging Toshia. The floating carpet held its position well, Toshia thought, as she fucked her four fingers in and out of Amy's cunt. Licking steadily at the clit in front of her, Toshia withdrew her fingers, clustered them together with her thumb and proceeded to push into Amy's pussy until her entire hand was inside the beautiful woman, who was now writhing on the carpet, clutching her breasts and moaning aloud. Toshia kept pumping her hand in and out of Amy, whose juices were flowing freely, running slowly down Toshia's arm. All the while, Toshia continued licking and now sucking at Amy's clit. Toshia now realized that she wanted to be fisted by Amy, Shelonda or Nicole in the very near future -- maybe they could take turns! Then, Amy was coming, loud, long and hard. Toshia held her hand still, deep inside Amy's clenching vagina, and sucked on her clit as Amy enthusiastically and vocally rode out her intense orgasm. When Amy collapsed back down on the carpet -- her full breasts rising and falling as she caught her breath -- Toshia slowly withdrew her sopping, slippery hand, turned to the Minotaur, and said, "She's all yours, big fella." The Minotaur, whose erection had never done more than slightly subside, moved forward quickly to take Toshia's place between Amy's thighs. Amy smiled up at him as he pushed the big, fat head of his phallus slowly into her waiting pussy. "Oh, yes!" Amy said with a grin. "That feels great! Fuck me with that big cock!" The Minotaur didn't hesitate, and proceeded to push the rest of his massive organ into Amy's willing pussy. The carpet didn't budge as he began to fuck steadily in and out of her. Amy encouraged the Minotaur with a steady stream of happy grunts and moans. Toshia clambered up on the carpet, got on her hands and knees and gave Amy a long, deep kiss, sharing the sweet taste of pussy. Toshia loved the sight of Amy's nice round tits jiggling back and forth as she was fucked steadily. She moved to get her mouth on one of those luscious boobs, but Amy stopped her, saying, "Sit on my face, Toshia. I want to lick you." More than happy to oblige, Toshia quickly straddled Amy's head, facing the Minotaur so she could watch him fucking Amy. She lowered herself down until she felt Amy's mouth and tongue on her pussy and clit. Amy proceeded to lick the Minotaur's cum out of Toshia, while her chin pressed against Toshia's clit. Wriggling a little in delight, Toshia noticed that the Minotaur's horns were just over her head, and just the right distance apart... She reached up and took hold of them, using them to hold herself in place over Amy's mouth. In this way the three of them formed a triangle, connected at Amy's mouth and Toshia's pussy, Toshia's hands and the Minotaur's horns, and the Minotaur's huge cock and Amy's pussy. Like this they swayed and worked together, each of them getting closer and closer to orgasmic release. Toshia found the sight of that enormous cock sliding in and out of Amy to be incredibly erotic, in part because she was having a hard time with the fact that her own tiny little body had taken that thing in so wonderfully well. She swayed there, between Amy's talented tongue and the Minotaur's horns, watching Amy's beautiful pale and perfectly curved body getting plundered by this mythical beast with its dark, monstrous cock, and remembered that that same thing had just a short while ago had fucked her as vigorous and filled her with its thick, sweet cum, which Amy now had so eagerly licked and sucked out of her. "Oh, fuck!" Toshia sighed. Then she cried out as she came again, pushing down on Amy's mouth as the explosion of delight swept over her in intense, fiery waves. She held on to the bull's horns as she shook and shuddered. Then Amy and the Minotaur were coming, moaning and grunting loudly in the clearing. Toshia managed to get off Amy's face without taking her eyes off the image of the two bodies coupling in passionate carnal union. As Amy shuddered through the tail end of her orgasm, she moaned, "Oh, that was wonderful!" Toshia smiled down at her friend, and leaned down to give her a long kiss, enjoying the taste of herself on Amy's mouth. After a moment, Amy sighed and Toshia looked down to see that the Minotaur had pulled out of Amy's pussy. There was a long rope of white cum hanging between the head of his cock and Amy. "Yum!" Toshia exclaimed and quickly crawled to the edge of the carpet. She caught hold of the Minotaur's hip and urged him closer. When he obliged, she sucked the head of his cock half-way into her mouth, simultaneously getting a mouthful of delicious cum and getting her face covered with the stuff. After sucking down several good swallows of jizz from the Minotaur's cock, Toshia lowered her mouth to Amy's messy cunt and began to suck and lick up every bit of Minotaur cum she could find. Amy happily encouraged Toshia, even to the point of gently rolling the both of them over into a 69, with Amy on top, so every drop of the mingled Minotaur's juice and her own would run down into Toshia's mouth and onto her face. Of course, Amy also took the opportunity to go back to licking Toshia, this time directly concentrating on her clit. While they were engaged with each other like this, they were very close to hanging off the edge of the floating carpet. The Minotaur, who apparently felt left out, took advantage of this situation and came back over to press the head of his big, brown cock between Amy's legs, between Amy's pussy and Toshia's mouth. With a little help from Toshia and the Minotaur, Amy adjusted her hips so he could enter her again, while Toshia could continue licking Amy's clit. Toshia lay there on her back, having her pussy and clit licked by Amy, who was being fucked from behind by a big man-bull, while Toshia was herself tonguing Amy's clit and the underside of the beast's hard shaft. It didn't take much of this before Amy was coming again for the third time. Toshia followed soon after, gasping and moaning underneath Amy. Then, to Toshia's surprise, the Minotaur was coming again as well. His cock swelled in front of her eyes and she watched as he pumped cum up into Amy. Of course, there wasn't enough room for all that cum, so it spilled out around that big cock down onto Toshia's face and into her eager mouth. She tried to catch it all, but when he pulled out of Amy, very slowly, a flood of the sticky, delicious stuff ran out into her mouth and all over her face. Laughing, Toshia did her best to lick Amy clean, but it was no use; there was just too much, and it was all over the place. Amy moved around so that she could help Toshia out, licking and sucking up as much of the cum as she could, or helping scoop it up for Toshia to slurp down. When they were as done as they were likely to get, the two women sat up and noticed the Minotaur was standing by, watching them. His cock was now, finally, deflated. "I like your friend," Amy grinned. "Can we keep him?" "He certainly does have some good qualities, doesn't he?" Toshia smiled. Then, as she hopped off the carpet, she asked the Minotaur, "Do you have something like a club? You know, a big stick you could use to knock things around." He looked back at her in apparent confusion, so she looked around for a moment, found a good sized stick and showed him what she had in mind. He seemed to understand and headed off into the forest. "We better get cleaned up before he comes back with another hard-on," Toshia laughed. As she dropped off the carpet, Amy said, "Oh, that reminds me, I have your clothes with me." "Clothes," Toshia said as she stepped into the cold water of the stream, "I remember those." While they washed the sweat and cum off, Amy said, "I was supposed to just fly around the area out of sight for a while, and then go back to see if the others needed help, but then I saw you and your friend." "Well, we better go see if we can help them out," Toshia smiled. "Those women are bad asses and probably have Don tied up and whipped or something already." By the time they had pulled their clothes on over their damp bodies, the Minotaur had returned, carrying what looked like the trunk of a small tree. "Can we leave that carpet here?" Toshia asked. "I think so," Amy nodded. "It's only supposed to move where I tell it to." "That's convenient." Toshia tried to explain to the Minotaur that she wanted it to follow her and help her out if needed. He seemed to understand all of this to some extent, and fell in behind her as Toshia led him and Amy back toward the castle. Walking on the ground, and without worrying much at all about being quiet, they made good time through the forest. When they came to the crumbling stone wall, Toshia led them around until they came to the clearing in front of the castle's gate. It looked like someone had made a mess out of the ground there in front of the castle, and Toshia naturally feared the worst for Don and the others. In front of the gate were two sentinels -- women who took one look at the Minotaur behind Toshia, gaped for a second, and then bolted inside. "OK, let's hope the rest of them are as scared as they were," Toshia said grimly. "Stay close." Toshia knew that the sisters could probably gang up on the Bull and bring him down, but it would be a costly victory, and she was hoping they would be too freaked about his sudden appearance at her side to actually fight. She was counting on the elements of surprise and fear to carry the day so that they could get Don, Shelonda and Nicole and get the hell out of there before the sisters had time to collect their wits. With all this in mind, Toshia led her little trio with the big stick into the courtyard of the castle. She wasn't surprised to see the sisters all gathered there armed to the teeth and looking at her and the Minotaur with alarm. They were all scrambling to get as far away from the Bull as they possibly could. Their bogeyman was probably bigger and scarier in real life, and not only had those dangerous horns but was wielding a huge club. She also expected to be confronted by the indomitable Daphne and Brigit. What Toshia had not been expecting, though, was seeing Don at the head of these women. He stood there confidently, his staff held lightly in his hand. He was a bit bloody, and seemed to have the beginnings of a black eye, but he was smiling at her with obvious ease. Also obvious, was the fact that both Daphne and Brigit were standing behind him, looking to him for leadership. "Hi Toshia, we were just coming out to look for you," he said. "And I was just coming to rescue you," she said, "but obviously you don't need it." "And neither do you," he laughed. Then Don dropped his staff, and caught her in his arms as she rushed across the courtyard. She hugged him tightly, and reveled in having his warm embrace around her. She hadn't really appreciated how much she had missed him until that moment. Finally, they were together again. To be continued. By BradentonLarry for Literotica
Amazons Defeated by Kung Fu Master, disguised as a sexy witch.By BradentonLarry - Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.Shelonda & Don defeated the Amazon tribal sisters, and gained the release of Toshia.“I don’t like this plan, Don,” Nicole had said. “I don’t want to see any more killing.”“Neither do I,” Don replied. “We’re going to do everything we can to avoid seriously hurting anyone. How much first aid do they teach pre-med students?”The answer had been not much, but Nicole had been a girl scout and knew some rudiments. So, she was assigned the role of medic for the rescue mission.“There it is!” Don said, pointing ahead to where he could just see the old ruined castle poking up out of the forest. “Let’s find someplace to land not too far from it.”In another minute, responding to Amy’s mental commands, the carpet settled down in a small clearing just a short, wooded distance from the castle’s gate. Don, Shelonda and Nicole disembarked – Nicole quite eagerly – and Amy had the carpet carry her back up into the sky. Amy had her instructions. She hadn’t liked the thought of being left out of the main action, but had eventually accepted Don’s reasoning. At the very least, if Don’s plan didn’t work, they wouldn’t all be captured.With Don taking the lead, the three on the ground set off through the forest toward the castle of the Sisterhood. It was only a short walk before they came to another, much larger, clearing in front of the gate of the castle. The gate itself was very old, mostly of wood and actually in surprisingly good condition. It had two valves, and the one on the right was standing open. Two women were there, apparently on guard, though they had placed their spears against the wall and were practicing what looked like crude judo take-downs. Don and the others got half way across the clearing to them before either of them noticed.“Hey! Who the hell are you?” said one, a tall woman with short, jet-black hair. To her credit, her partner, a shorter blonde with longer hair, immediately went to grab both spears and took the opportunity to give a high-pitched whistle through the open gate.“I’m Don, and this is my student Shelonda and our medical assistant Nicole,” Don said amiably as he continued to approach the castle.“Medical assistant?” the guard asked as her companion brought her spear.“To help if anyone gets injured.”“OK, that’s far enough,” the guard said as she leveled her spear at Don’s chest, “or you’re going to get injured permanently.”Don frowned a little at that. He actually suspected that the XYZ would help his, or anyone’s, body repair any injury short of death, but he didn’t bother to explain this to the dark-haired woman. Instead he said, “We’re here to collect our friend, who we believe has been a guest of the Sisterhood for the last few days.”“Oh you are, are you?” said a voice from above the gate.Don looked up to see a beautiful woman with long black hair spilling over her shoulders and her armor standing on the battlements over the gate. She certainly seemed to have the regal bearing that would go along with leading the Sisterhood. He decided at that moment that this woman would respond better to a particular approach – one of individual dominance.“I am,” Don nodded. “She became separated from us, and has been here. I would be grateful if you returned her.”“And if I don’t?” asked the woman, confirming Don’s guess as to her role in the Sisterhood.“Then I’ll have to make you,” Don smiled.The woman laughed derisively, and then said, “Kill him, and take the women.”Without hesitation, the two guards drew back to thrust at Don with their spears. Before they could attack though, his staff came up and spun around in a clean arc through the place where the black-haired one’s head had been, carrying her down into a crumpled heap on the ground where she lay unconscious. Immediately, Don reversed the momentum of his staff, batting the blonde’s spear aside, and then brought the other end of the staff around to strike the woman’s knee hard enough to buckle her leg painfully in the wrong direction. She cried out in pain before Don stretched her on the ground with a blow to the head. The entire exchange had taken less than three seconds.Don held up his left hand to the half dozen warrior women who had by now come through the gate and who were ready to charge him.“We do not want to fight the Sisterhood,” he said in a loud, calm voice. “We only want our friend, Toshia, who is here in your castle. Give her to us and Nicole here will tend to these good women and we will be on our way. If you do not give her to us, though, I must challenge your leader to personal combat.”“We do not stoop to fight with men,” one of the women in front of Don sneered. She was a big redhead with a spray of freckles across her face.“That sounds like cowardice to me,” Don smiled back at her.“Take them down,” the woman on the wall ordered.At once, the six women, led by the freckled redhead, charged Don and the girls. Don’s hypothesis was that the XYZ was supercharging more than just their sex drives, and that if he and Shelonda deliberately sought to direct their energies into good kung fu they would be nearly unstoppable fighting machines. Moreover, he had repeatedly noticed the flexible nature of Eros, in that what a focused mind wanted often made itself available. Don and Shelonda were now throwing themselves into the fray, letting the XYZ course through their veins and expecting the world to bend itself to their will. They leapt higher, dodged faster, and hit harder than seemed humanly possible. In addition, they had a particular advantage thanks to the Wizard; their staffs had been enchanted. Though they were still the light, flexible staffs Don and Shelonda had brought from the Manor, they were now, for all intents and purposes, unbreakable, and struck with a force much greater than normal. There were additional abilities as well, but they were trying to hold back on those, both to keep at least one of them in reserve as a surprise and because they really didn’t want to severely injure anyone.It only took a minute or so before all six of the sisters were lying on the ground around Don and Shelonda, either unconscious or groaning in pain. Nicole quickly began moving about them, checking for broken bones and beginning to bandage ankles and knees.“So,” Don called to the rest of the Sisterhood, who by now were gathered outside the gate or along the walls, “you will not stoop to fight a man, but you will stoop to attacking us three to one. That’s very brave. I’m quite impressed.”“I’ll take you one-on-one, little man,” said a muscular woman with short brown hair. “When I’m done with you, I’ll fuck your ass with that staff of yours.”“Always the ass, eh, Wanda?” said a woman from the crowd.Wanda laughed and stepped forward hefting a good sized battle axe in her strong hands.Don smiled at her, “If you’re nice, maybe I’ll fuck your ass with my ‘staff' before I’m done with you.”The women seemed to like this and laughed at and with Wanda. Though she didn’t really seem to mind the teasing, Wanda chose this moment to charge Don. It was a clumsy attack, and Don had no trouble slipping out of the way. His staff flew around and smacked Wanda hard on the butt. He thought the force of her charge would require a few more steps before she could turn, but Wanda surprised him by spinning tightly and swinging her axe across at his mid-section. Don sprang back in time, but only just. With impressive speed, she changed the direction of the axe, swept it up and then arcing down at Don’s head. Rather than dodging though, Don stepped in and threw his staff up in both hands, to catch the axe haft as it came down. Neither staff nor axe gave way, as Don expected, though Wanda was surprised that the axe hadn’t continued right through the apparently more flimsy staff. Don took advantage of her surprise by kicking her very hard in the crotch. Though this didn’t have exactly the same effect it might have on a male, it still hurt, and Wanda winced and pulled back. Don pressed the attack, spinning his staff in a withering barrage of strikes aimed at Wanda’s head. While she was able to successfully block each strike, Don was able to throw her off balance enough that he was able to slip in close and punch her sharply in the gut. With a loud “Oof!” Wanda doubled over, leaving herself open to a decisive rap on the skull that laid her out on the ground.There was a small burst of applause, abruptly cut off, as Don turned to look over the gathered sisters with a cheerful yet derisive smile. He was less astounded by his speed and strength than he was by his endurance; he was barely breathing hard. “Anyone else want to do your leader’s fighting for her?”“You’re pretty good with that stick,” said a beautiful, tall blonde wearing her hair in braids, as she stepped forward. She was wearing a blue sleeveless tunic hanging down almost to her knees and cinched at the waist, leather wrist bands and sandals laced up the length of her calves. She had all the beauty of Nordic women and a muscular build that indicated both strength and speed. She also seemed to be smiling at Don with genuine good nature. She asked, “Can you measure up without a weapon?”Don nodded and said, “Let’s find out.” He tossed his staff to Shelonda and bowed to the blonde, adding, “I’m Don.”“Brigit,” she nodded.Don was acutely aware of the fact that he had just given any attentive spectators a good demonstration of his basic fighting style. This gave Brigit a possible advantage. She certainly had the fire of intelligence burning in her eyes, so Don assumed she had an actual advantage. As a result of these thoughts he did not rush in to attack her, though a fast step in and side-kick was usually a good move in this kind of situation. He relaxed his shoulders, slowed his breathing, and waited for Brigit to make the first move.Brigit eyed Don calmly as she began to circle him. He noted that she had her hands raised and open, suggesting that she might be a grappler. Though she was ordinarily someone he might enjoy grappling, Don had little taste for wrestling as a form of combat. He was out-massed by the big woman; speed, agility and determination were his assets, two-thirds of which would be sacrificed in a clinch.He turned as she moved, eventually turning his back on the bulk of the Sisterhood. Don actually thought they were too caught up in the fun of watching the fight to actually interfere, and he was sure Shelonda would alert him if someone made an unsporting move. Rather than attack him, the sisters were taunting both Brigit and him, telling them to get on with it.Finally, Brigit did just that, taking a few quick steps in Don’s direction, but he only danced back laughing. She came in again, this time faster and swinging her right fist in a roundhouse. Don had bounced back, though, and to his left. Before she could readjust, he landed two quick blows on her right side. It felt like he’d punched a wall.Brigit rounded on him, but he had already skipped back out of the way. Her smile suggested that his punches hadn’t made much of an impression. Don didn’t mind that; he was still sizing her up.She came in fast again, but Don could tell she was a bit hesitant; expecting him to evade her she was holding back. Don responded by closing the distance between them. He blocked the blow she aimed at the left side of his head with his forearm and simultaneously punched straight ahead at her nose. There was a satisfying crunching sound as his fist connected. Don didn’t leave his fist out there long, but snapped it back in time to block the punch she threw at the right side of his head. If he’d been slower, Brigit’s right-left combination would certainly have knocked him senseless; the woman was certainly powerful. He brought his knee up and quickly snapped his heel into Brigit’s gut, pushing the two of them apart again.Brigit’s nose was bleeding profusely, and she wasn’t smiling any more. Don had to admit that this bout wasn’t turning out as playfully as he’d hoped. He thought he’d give the sister a moment to wipe some of the blood off her face, but she came at him again. This time, she tried to close faster and punch straight at him. Don dropped low, under her reach and hit her in the side again, this time much harder. They passed each other and turned, but Brigit took the opportunity to swing her fist back-handed at Don’s head. He only pulled back far enough to take the blow on his cheek. The force of the impact knocked him to the side a bit and he tasted his own blood.Brigit came at him quickly, and Don had to backpedal and block furiously to avoid getting seriously hurt. Finally he was able to strike upward with the heel of his hand at Brigit’s chin. Her head snapped back and she stumbled backward. Don sprang forward, taking two steps and then was high in the air, his foot snapped around with blinding speed and Brigit’s head twisted to the side. Don and Brigit landed on the ground at the same time, he lightly on his feet and she heavily on her back. As the crowd of women cheered in spite of themselves, Don knelt quickly to make sure that Brigit was still breathing. Nicole hurried up to check as well.Before they could say a word to each other, Brigit opened her eyes and said, “Damn! That was fast.”Don smiled down at her, touched his cheek which was already red and starting to swell, and said, “It was an honor, ma'am.”“Next time, I’m going to kick your ass, you know.”“I’ll look forward to it,” he grinned.“Enough!” a familiar voice barked over the hubbub at the gate.Don looked up to see that the beautiful sister who had been talking to him from the wall had come down to the gate. Since she was smart enough to lead this group of strong-willed women, Don figured she must realize her predicament. If she had the other women attack Don she would appear weak, even if they succeeded in defeating Shelonda and him, which some of them must now be thinking was no sure thing. If she handed over Toshia she would appear weak. If she just shut the gates on them and let them go away she would appear weak. In fact, if she did anything other than fight him she would appear weak and her authority would be undermined. Bullies were so easy to manipulate, Don thought. Of course, she must now see that there was a very good chance that she would be beaten by Don, which would be no less a disaster, at least from her perspective.She came out in front of the small crowd of women, wearing a metallic breast plate that still managed to show off some cleavage, a skirt of chainmail, metal greaves and bracers. Her midriff was impractically bare, though Don certainly didn’t mind that. Her jet black hair had now been pulled back into a long ponytail. Don thought she was staggeringly beautiful, and the haughty attitude only made her more appealing for some reason. In her hand was a gleaming long sword in particularly good condition.“You fight well for a man,” she sneered.Don, who had stood up, bowed a little in acknowledgement.“I give you the opportunity to go in peace.”“We will gladly do so if you return our friend to us,” Don answered.“We will not give you what is rightfully ours.”“Rightfully yours?” Nicole interjected indignantly.“Hush,” Don said quietly. Then, back to the leader of the Sisterhood, “We will not leave without her.”“Very well,” she nodded. “I will make you submit to me, or you will die.”“Or you will submit to me,” Don smiled easily.“I do not submit to men,” she spat.“Not to men, perhaps, but you will to me.”She scowled at him angrily, obviously unused to such impertinence. Finally she said, “I will not fight you here; the ground is littered with your sparring partners. Come inside and fight me in our courtyard. No one but me will harm you.”Don nodded his acceptance, and turned to take his staff back from Shelonda, who took the opportunity to say, “I don’t know, Don, she looks mean.”“Yeah, she does, doesn’t she?” he grinned.As the three of them approached the gate the sisters made way for them, and Nicole said, “Just remember, I don’t have any bandages big enough for sword wounds.”They were led to an open area inside the castle where the sisters obviously worked out and practiced with their weapons. Some of the sisters and some smaller, obviously less assertive women quickly dragged various bags and targets out of the way, clearing the space for the impending duel. The other sisters climbed up on ledges and walls around the courtyard to make sure they had a good view. Don noticed that Brigit and Wanda were able to come in and take their places on a crumbled section of wall. There were a number of doorways leading into the courtyard, and, opposite the point where they’d entered, a set of broad stone stairs led to another open area, where a bunch of chairs were arranged.As soon as everything had been cleared from the area sufficiently, the leader of the sisters took her place near the center of the courtyard, and said, “If you need a sword, Brigit can lend you hers.”“No, that’s alright; I wouldn’t want to take a chance on cutting that beautiful body of yours,” Don smiled easily, as if he was flirting with someone at the local coffee shop.“I assure you I have no such reservations about cutting yours.”“I think that’s a lie… What’s your name, by the way?” Don began to slowly walk toward her across the open ground, his staff in his right hand.“Daphne,” she snapped. “What do you mean 'you think that’s a lie’?”“Well, you might just be mistaken, but I’m pretty sure you don’t really want to hurt me.”“Oh,” she laughed, “you’re quite wrong.”Don shook his head a little, and said, “No, I don’t think I am. I think you’re starting to think it would be nice if I beat you and carried you off somewhere and ravished you.”“How dare you!”“I’ll bet it’s been a very long time since you were well and properly ravished.”“What in the world makes you think I’d have the slightest interest in being ravished by anyone like you?”“The fact that you’ve let me get this close to you,” Don smiled. He was only a foot away from her. Close enough to see her blue eyes quite clearly enough to read the surprise and then anger in them.“You bastard!” she hissed and leapt back, simultaneously bringing her sword up and around in a blinding arc.Don laughed as he skipped back, temporarily out of range. Daphne followed though, spinning her sword in a furiously fast series of arcs in front of her.“That’s fancy,” Don nodded, “but I can do it too.” He began to spin his staff in a figure-eight motion covering his front and sides.Snarling, Daphne leapt in and swung, counting on her steel blade to cut or bash its way through Don’s screen. Instead the sword glanced off, and Don effortlessly reversed the staff’s direction to hit Daphne’s exposed side. As before, the staff’s enchantments imparted greater force than the momentum Don provided would indicate. Cursing under her breath, Daphne snapped her blade around in an arc aimed directly at Don’s head. Twisting quickly, Don brought his much lighter weapon up in time to block the strike, catching the blade in the middle of the staff between Don’s hands.There was the briefest pause when it was clear to Daphne that her sword should have broken the staff. Don smiled and said, “Yeah, that’s not going to happen, my dear.”“Is your head unbreakable?” she asked, and then quickly snapped her blade around, over her head, to slash at Don from the opposite side. Don blocked this easily, though the edge of her sword was only inches from his scalp. Apparently unconcerned, Don let Daphne wear herself out with a series of strong, fast cuts that he blocked almost casually.When it seemed that she might be slowing down, but before she could change her tactics on her own, Don changed his. He dropped low, into a proper low stance, letting her sword whistle by high over his head, and drove the end of his staff hard into Daphne’s belly. He followed this by sweeping the staff at her shapely legs. He managed to catch one and threw it out from under her. Off balance from this double assault, Daphne stumbled backward. Don pursued her, pressing his advantage. It was Daphne’s turn to retreat and parry. Three times Don managed to hit her, once more in the gut, once hard across the arm, leaving a bright red mark, and once a glancing blow to the head, which left a slight gash and a smear of blood.This last hit seemed to irritate Daphne more than the others and she launched into another enthusiastic offensive, which was actually rather successful. She managed to leave a shallow cut along Don’s left shoulder and actually achieved a solid hit on Don’s right shin, which would have crippled him if he hadn’t been wearing his shin guards, fresh from the Wizard’s wardrobe. Pausing slightly in surprise or anger, Daphne let Don get close enough that he struck out with the heel of his hand, hitting her hard in the center of her chest just above her chest plate where it showed off her cleavage. Daphne gasped and stumbled back again, this time backing up until she tripped a bit on the steps at her back.To her credit, Daphne recovered quickly, stepped up on the stairs, and had her sword at the ready in the second it took Don to launch his next offensive. He drove her up the stairs until she was on the level with the chairs. He heard the sisters clamoring behind him to keep the fight in view. There was a brief exchange during which the tip of Daphne’s sword scratched over the surface of Don’s chest armor, Don’s staff cracked Daphne’s right thigh hard enough to make her cry out and then to favor that leg, and a sword blow which was deflected by Don’s bracer scored a bloody wound on the back of his left forearm. Don seemed not to notice the two wounds he had sustained, and continued to drive Daphne back toward the chairs behind her. When she came up against one she had to devote a minute bit of attention to keeping her balance and maneuvering around these obstacles, and this minor distraction provided Don with the chance to strike her right wrist hard enough to make her drop her sword. As the blade clattered to the stone floor, Don dropped his staff, and closed in.Kicking the chair behind her away, Daphne was just barely able to twist aside to avoid the kick Don aimed at her midsection. She got her hands and guard up fast enough to deflect the series of blows he aimed at her head, and then gave him a fast jab which connected with his brow just above his left eye. Moving in, pushing her back further, Don ignored the blood that ran down past his eye, and threw a furious combination of punches and knee strikes at Daphne.Then, suddenly, Daphne was falling backward into a big hole in the floor that Don had only barely noticed. A bit surprised, he still managed to catch her right wrist, but, rather than allowing him to catch her fall, this only meant that he was pulled down with her.Together they landed on what seemed to be a very large, thick mattress. Don landed on top of Daphne, though he was able to brace himself on impact so that he didn’t crush her too much. There was a moment when he was able to take in the surroundings – there were bars around the mattress, surprised, naked men looking in at them from the other side, a battered old mirror, and apparently freshly laundered red sheets – before Daphne began to struggle to push him off her. Don was done playing with her, though.He caught her beautiful throat in his left hand and squeezed just a little. Looking down into her livid face, he smiled and said, “Now, that’s enough. I won and you know it.”Daphne spat at him, and he tightened his grip a bit. Don shoved his leg between hers and used his position and leverage to push her strong thighs apart. Reaching down with his right hand, he pushed his palm up along the inside of her leg, under her chainmail skirt. Sure enough, when he got there, he found her already very wet.Don chuckled a little and a drop of blood from his forehead dripped onto her cheek. As he stroked her moist lips, she continued to struggle but not very convincingly – at least not to Don or to her. He smiled and asked, “Still going to say you’re not interested?”“I goddamn hate you!” she insisted. Then Don pushed his fingers up inside her and she groaned a little in the bottom of her throat.“I don’t think that’s the same thing,” Don smirked as he began to work his fingers in and out of her, cupping his hand over her sex, palm rubbing against her clit. He was aware that the men were watching them and that the sisters had gathered around the opening through which Don and Daphne had fallen. What they saw was a combination of Don pinning Daphne to the mattress while he roughly handled her and Daphne sort of struggling while clearly responding to his touch on her.“You’ve fucking ruined everything, you bastard,” she breathed through clenched teeth.“Do you want me to stop?”“Would you stop if I said yes?” she scowled.“No.”Daphne closed her eyes again and let a tremor of pleasure pass over her. So quietly that only Don could hear her, she said, “Good.”Don pushed his thigh up between her legs, taking the place of his hand against her crotch. As he fumbled at his pants to push them and his cup down to free his already half hard cock, Don leaned down and kissed Daphne. Shocked, she first let him kiss her, then she began to respond, and then she remembered herself and bit at his lip, drawing a bit more blood. Don just laughed and shoved her back into the mattress with the hand around her throat. He knew full well that he wasn’t exerting anywhere near enough force to actually hold her down if she really wanted to get out from under him.Then, using his legs and his right hand, Don shoved Daphne’s legs apart and settled between them. He shoved her metal skirt up, took his now very hard cock in hand and pushed it down between her legs. Don felt her warm, wet lips embracing his head and then he pushed himself slowly into her. As he filled her tight pussy, he leaned down and said, “You’re mine now, Daphne.”“I still hate you,” she growled even as she was reaching down to grab his ass and pull him into her.“Say it,” he said.“I’m yours now,” she breathed, “you bastard.”Laughing, Don shoved in the rest of the way, feeling his head hitting her cervix. He rocked there for a moment inside her and pressed against her, before pulling almost all the way out and then driving in again. After several such long, deep thrusts, he felt her hand slipping around his neck and then holding the back of his head. Daphne pulled him down to her and kissed him, not grudgingly but passionately, hungrily. They were kissing and biting at each other as his cock slipped in and out of her fiery pussy. Don maintained this steady, slow, deep fucking until he felt Daphne clenching and squeezing on him, gasping around his tongue and lips as she came long and hard.Don pulled back a bit, looking down at her and asked, “Who else has ever beaten you?”“No one,” she answered proudly.Don began to fuck in and out of her again, and said, “So there’s no reason you should ever bow down to anyone but me, is there?”She smiled up at him, and for the first time the smile seemed completely without malice, “No, there certainly isn’t.”“I’m glad we had this little chat,” he chuckled and began to pump in and out of her with increased vigor. Daphne wrapped her long, strong legs around him and pulled him in closer. Don commenced fucking her hard and fast. He had promised her ravishment and that’s what he was delivering. Claiming her body as the rightful prize in their fight, Don took her as his own, pushing himself into her with all the energy he had used to best her in combat. Daphne now gave no appearance of anything but enthusiastic participation. No one watching could have any doubt that she was enjoying every moment of the fucking Don was giving her. When she cried out with her second orgasm, Don felt his own spilling over. He thrust deep into her and filled her with his cum, shuddering and trembling as he spewed his seed deep inside her, claiming her in as intimate a way as he could think of.When Don finally stopped coming, and had caught his breath, he began to look around a bit for the first time since he had begun taking Daphne. Before he could get a good look, though, she pulled his head down and gave him a brief, passionate kiss. When he pulled back to smile down at her, she whispered, “Thank you.”“My pleasure,” Don smiled warmly at her. For a fleeting moment, he thought it would be fun to stay here with this Amazon queen and rule this little corner of the forest. Then he remembered what he could never fully forget – the need to find Toshia. Withdrawing from Daphne’s warm, wet embrace, Don sat back on his haunches. A burst of applause from the men on the other side of the bars around them surprised him. His first instinct was to grin and bow, but he recalled the dynamic he had no interest in undermining and scowled at the men imperiously, and said in a commanding voice, “Don’t think any of you have earned the right to disrespect this woman, your mistress.”The applause died off immediately.Minotaur EncountersDon stood up, tucked himself back into his pants, and rearranged his clothing. Only now, seeing Daphne’s own disheveled and battered state, did he remember that he was covered in sweat and blood. He was about to ask how they were supposed to get out of this room, when a rope ladder was dropped down from the open ceiling.When they climbed up to rejoin Shelonda, Nicole and the sisters, Don was unsurprised to see that the women were succumbing to the tendency to friskiness that ruled this world. Women were making out and fondling each other all over the place. None of it was particularly intense, though, and the reemergence of Don and Daphne was noticed at once. Very quickly all the playing ceased, and the sisters disentangled themselves. Brigit, her face still bloody from her nose, came forward, nodded to them and promptly dropped to one knee, bowing her head. Not quite at once, and sometimes a bit grudgingly, the rest of the Sisterhood took a knee around Don. Only Daphne, Nicole and Shelonda didn’t explicitly kneel to his authority.“You honor me by your submission, sisters,” Don said in a loud voice. “You have fought well and there is no shame in this defeat.”Shelonda stepped up and handed him his staff. Don smiled at her and then turned to Daphne and said simply, “Our friend.”Daphne nodded and said to Brigit, “Go fetch the pup.”Brigit got up at once and went, while Don had to suppress a smirk and a chuckle. He tried to be serious as he asked Daphne, “The pup?”Daphne nodded, “That must be your friend. We didn’t bother asking her name. You have to earn your place here, and she needed to be … house broken.”Don couldn’t help laughing at this. Then he asked, “So, how’s that going for you?”Daphne smiled and began to answer when Brigit came back much sooner than expected. The blonde was followed by a naked waif of a brunette who seemed rather distraught.Brigit didn’t say anything until she came close enough to Don and Daphne that what she said wouldn’t be overheard by more than a few people. Then she whispered, “She seems to have run away.”“Run away?” Daphne seemed confused at the very possibility.“This girl was coming to find me,” Brigit explained. “Apparently .Toshia climbed out a window some time before Don arrived.”Don smiled broadly. I should have realized Toshia wouldn’t need to be rescued.Daphne saw his smile and said, “There is reason for concern. Your friend is no fighter and there is some danger in the woods.”“What kind of danger?” Nicole asked.Daphne didn’t answer immediately, but said to Brigit, “Get everyone who isn’t injured organized into search parties.” Then, once Brigit had nodded and turned away, Daphne said to Don and the others, “There is a dangerous creature that lives in the forest. We call it the Bull.”Chapter 13The Bull: Toshia has charms to soothe the savage beast.Toshia had almost no experience with large animals. She hadn’t grown up on a farm or anything. All she could think was that she shouldn’t make any aggressive or fast moves. She was glad she didn’t have a red cape or anything, but then realized that she didn’t even know if that made any sense. Maybe bulls just had poor vision so bullfighters used the bright color to draw their attention. Of course, it was likely that none of this really mattered, since, clearly, this was no ordinary bull.Sure, it had the head of a dark brown bull, with large, dangerous looking horns. Its big dark eyes were watching Toshia carefully. It had a thick bovine neck, covered with proper bull fur… or was it hair on cows? At the shoulders though, everything changed. From there on down, well, until the thighs, the Bull had the body of a big, muscular man, also dark brown, though hairier than she had ever seen a black man’s body. His thighs started out human, but transitioned strangely into the legs of a sturdy bull, complete with hooves. How he managed to balance effectively on those feet was a puzzle she set aside for the moment.Toshia held still as the Bull, or, more properly, the Minotaur, took a few steps toward her, moving further into the sunlit clearing. Toshia was not surprised to see that it had a large cock between its legs. She guessed that the Minotaur was two meters tall at the shoulder, but couldn’t work out exactly how tall it was altogether, counting the head and horns, particularly since the broad neck bent forward. It had very broad shoulders and superb musculature to support that heavy cranium and those big horns.It looked at her carefully, perhaps wondering why she didn’t run off. Toshia was wondering that herself. As it looked at her, its hand moved to its cock. Toshia’s eyes followed the motion, and noticed that he was getting hard looking at her naked body. She caught herself smiling at the thought, and wondered if there were any she-Minotaurs in the neighborhood. Maybe that’s why he’s got a bad reputation, she thought. She decided to try communicating with him.In her sweetest voice she said, “Have you been chasing the girls with that big cock of yours?”The Minotaur blew a little air out of its nose, as if it was laughing, and then Toshia was sure he nodded his big head a little.She decided, or decided to assume, he wasn’t going to charge her and kill her, so she stood up. She considered the creature’s now hard sex. It was as thick as the Player’s, but not quite as long. The sight of it was already making Toshia’s pussy wet.“I’m not going to run away,” she said.The Minotaur cocked his head to the side, as if he was trying to work out what Toshia was up to.Moving slowly and carefully, Toshia stepped across the little stream and approached the big male, who towered over her. She found herself unmistakably aroused at the Minotaur’s undeniably masculine physique and generous equipment. After her time with the satyrs she was well past thinking of these human-animal hybrids from classical mythology as being too alien for sexual congress. In spite of Nina’s concerns he didn’t seem in the slightest bit like a predator in any meaningful sense. He looked down at her with those deep brown eyes, and Toshia tried to imagine what he was thinking. If he’s like everything else around here, she thought, the XYZ has him completely horny.“What about it, big fella,” she said in her soft voice, “have all the girls been too afraid of you to help you out with that?”The Minotaur snorted what she took to be affirmation.Toshia reached out and ran her hand lightly over his chest. The hair was surprisingly soft, and his muscles were hard under his flesh. She moved her hand up to caress the sinews of his big neck, then down along his firm bicep. When she reached his big hand, she lifted it, a little surprised at how heavy it was. Toshia brought it up to her face and brushed her cheek against the furry back of the hand, and then placed it on naked breast. The Minotaur breathed in and began to caress her with a surprisingly gentle touch. Toshia had been a bit worried that he would be too rough and strong for her, but he seemed quite capable of controlling himself, at least for now.As her body quickened under the bull-man’s touch, Toshia reached out and up to trace her fingertips over the end of his large prick. Due to his greater height, the base was as high as her upper belly, and the length put the head about level with her collarbone. She bent her head down and kissed the tip of it. She reached up with her other hand and began to move both hands up and down his length. She couldn’t get her fingers around it entirely, but she did her best. In any case, she loved having the hard shaft of flesh in her grasp. Toshia began to kiss the head repeatedly, and then opened her mouth wide to get it past her lips. She bobbed her head a bit on him, enjoying having the meaty organ filling her mouth. Given her new-found mission to see how much she could do with her body, Toshia was quite determined to get this beautiful thing inside her. Her hands moved down to caress his big, full balls as she ran her tongue over his cockhead’s slit. She found some salty-sweet precum there and smiled happily up at those big brown eyes.“It sure is big,” she said, “and so hard. Do you want to fuck me with it?”The nod was unmistakable this time.Toshia laughed and said, “Good, but you have to promise to be gentle with me. You can do that, can’t you?”He nodded again.“OK, but how are we going to do this?” Toshia looked around the clearing. There was a low rise that looked like it might be of use, but Toshia thought the best option was probably the simplest. She looked around for something she could stand on. She saw a good sized rock near the stream and said, “Can you pick that up and put it over there near that tree?”The Minotaur snorted, almost derisively, and quickly moved over and picked up the big rock as if it was a big bag of groceries. He took it over to where Toshia stood pointing.“Put it right here,” she said. When it was in place, she stood on it, facing the tree. She was about a foot higher now. Toshia leaned forward, bracing her hands on the sturdy tree trunk. The rock was big enough that she could spread her feet out on it some, which she then did.Toshia looked over her shoulder and said, “How’s that?”As if he couldn’t believe his luck, the Minotaur carefully reached out to touch Toshia’s naked butt. When she didn’t scream or run away, he moved in closer, and she felt his thick cock against the crack between her cheeks.Toshia pushed back against him, looked over her shoulder and said, “Well, don’t keep a girl waiting, big fella.”There was another low bovine snort, and then she felt him pushing himself down between her legs. He must be bending his knees to get the angle right, she thought, and then the big, fat head was pressed against her eager and very wet lips. Then he was pushing into her, and she felt like it was too much for her to take, but only for a moment. Then all Toshia could think was how good it felt to have her pussy filled with that thick cock! She pushed back against him, making the Minotaur completely fill her.“God, that’s good!” she exclaimed.His big, broad hands grasped her around the waist, almost closing around her, and he began to work in and out of her.“Yes, that feels so good!” Toshia almost yelled. “Fuck me!”The Minotaur was soon grunting as his massive phallus plundered Toshia’s tight, wet pussy. She felt his hot breath on the top of her head. For a moment Toshia imagined the scene as if someone else were seeing it – her tiny body being fucked by this huge thing with a bull’s head. She would have reached down to play with her clit, but she needed to keep both hands on the tree to keep her balance. She wished there were someone there to see this preposterous and incredibly hot scene.“Now that looks like fun!” said a familiar voice from off to Toshia’s left.Toshia looked and was completely surprised to see Amy standing in the clearing watching her and the Bull. She was wearing a cute khaki explorer’s outfit, with a buttoned short sleeve shirt and cargo shorts. She was even wearing hiking boots. There were a lot of things crowding around in Toshia’s mind, none of which were adequate to the occasion of Amy’s sudden appearance. At the forefront, though, was Oh good! He didn’t get scared off. He’s still fucking me. So, Toshia decided to go with that thought and respond directly to what Amy had said.“Oh yeah, it is!” she grinned. “Are you just going to stand there and watch?”“That doesn’t sound like me, does it?” Amy laughed and quickly began to shed her clothes.Toshia turned her attention back to the vigorous fucking she was getting, and pushed herself back on the Minotaur’s stiff prick. She found herself eager to feel him filling her with his cum. Then she felt Amy’s hands on her body. The sexy blonde had stripped and was now between Toshia and the tree trunk, kissing Toshia’s breasts. Amy’s fingers moved down along Toshia’s belly, dancing lightly over the pink and red scrapes from Toshia’s descent from the trees, and quickly began to play with her clit. In mere moments, Toshia was coming, crying out and shaking as waves of ecstasy washed over her. As she came, she continued to push back against the Minotaur’s hard body. Then, when she was coming down, she felt that beautiful cock inside her swelling even more and then it was pumping hot, sweet cum up inside her.“Oh god, yes, yes,” Toshia moaned and then began to come again. She sagged between Amy and her Minotaur lover, tears running down her cheeks and a happy grin plastered on her face.“Wow,” Amy breathed as she hugged Toshia’s naked and sweaty body to her full breast. “Can I have a turn?”Toshia laughed and said, “I’m sure he’d like that.” She looked over her shoulder, saying, “How about it, big fella, do you want to fuck my pretty friend here?”The large, horned head nodded emphatically. The Minotaur immediately pulled out of Toshia with an audible sucking sound.“Hey, hey!” Toshia cried. “Take it easy there! We’re not going to run away on you, and it’s just rude to abandon a girl so abruptly.”The Minotaur made some almost articulate sounds that Toshia chose to interpret as an apology.Amy was helping Toshia keep her balance as she stepped off the fucking-stone, when Toshia saw that there was what looked like a fancy, large area rug in the clearing, with what looked like a back pack or satchel on it. She went ahead and asked, “What’s that?”“Oh, that’s the flying carpet,” Amy said. “The Wizard lent it to us so we could come rescue you.”“Um, okay. Where’s everyone else, then?”“They’re at the castle. Don’s fighting the sisters – that’s the right word, right? Don’s fighting them to make them release you,” Amy explained.Toshia laughed, “Of course he is.” She was suddenly both worried about Don’s safety and charmed by his foolhardy attempt to be the dashing hero. A number of ideas suggested themselves to her in fairly quick succession, but the one that seemed most pertinent was that there was pleasure to be attended to here in the forest. “Can you make that thing hover in place?”When Amy answered that she was pretty sure she could, Toshia gave her directions and soon the carpet was floating at just the right height and Amy was lying on her back upon it, with her butt on the edge and her legs spread.Toshia, still standing on the ground, leaned in and ran her tongue over Amy’s exposed pussy.“Mmm, delicious,” Toshia pronounced, “and already very wet. Want me to go down on you, or have our friend fuck you?”“Oh, can’t I have both?” Amy asked. She was already running her hands over her tits, squeezing and pulling at her hard nipples.“Can you wait, boy?” Toshia asked over her shoulder with a smile. She took the Minotaur’s snort as a “yes” and promptly bent back down to run her tongue up between Amy’s moist lips, scooping up the sweet nectar with the end of her tongue.“Oh, that feels so good,” Amy murmured.Toshia lapped her tongue over Amy’s clit, making the woman shudder and whimper. Toshia began to lick at Amy’s clit while moving her hand up so that she could push two, then three fingers up inside her pussy. Knowing that the Minotaur’s cock was easily as big around as her hand when it was squeezed together, Toshia decided Amy could do with the full treatment. Toshia kept licking Amy’s clit as she worked her fourth finger into her wet and grasping pussy. Amy gasped and shuddered, but relaxed her vagina to accept the extra intrusion, and even pushed back, encouraging Toshia.The floating carpet held its position well, Toshia thought, as she fucked her four fingers in and out of Amy’s cunt. Licking steadily at the clit in front of her, Toshia withdrew her fingers, clustered them together with her thumb and proceeded to push into Amy’s pussy until her entire hand was inside the beautiful woman, who was now writhing on the carpet, clutching her breasts and moaning aloud. Toshia kept pumping her hand in and out of Amy, whose juices were flowing freely, running slowly down Toshia’s arm. All the while, Toshia continued licking and now sucking at Amy’s clit. Toshia now realized that she wanted to be fisted by Amy, Shelonda or Nicole in the very near future – maybe they could take turns! Then, Amy was coming, loud, long and hard. Toshia held her hand still, deep inside Amy’s clenching vagina, and sucked on her clit as Amy enthusiastically and vocally rode out her intense orgasm.When Amy collapsed back down on the carpet – her full breasts rising and falling as she caught her breath – Toshia slowly withdrew her sopping, slippery hand, turned to the Minotaur, and said, “She’s all yours, big fella.”The Minotaur, whose erection had never done more than slightly subside, moved forward quickly to take Toshia’s place between Amy’s thighs. Amy smiled up at him as he pushed the big, fat head of his phallus slowly into her waiting pussy.“Oh, yes!” Amy said with a grin. “That feels great! Fuck me with that big cock!”The Minotaur didn’t hesitate, and proceeded to push the rest of his massive organ into Amy’s willing pussy. The carpet didn’t budge as he began to fuck steadily in and out of her. Amy encouraged the Minotaur with a steady stream of happy grunts and moans.Toshia clambered up on the carpet, got on her hands and knees and gave Amy a long, deep kiss, sharing the sweet taste of pussy. Toshia loved the sight of Amy’s nice round tits jiggling back and forth as she was fucked steadily. She moved to get her mouth on one of those luscious boobs, but Amy stopped her, saying, “Sit on my face, Toshia. I want to lick you.”More than happy to oblige, Toshia quickly straddled Amy’s head, facing the Minotaur so she could watch him fucking Amy. She lowered herself down until she felt Amy’s mouth and tongue on her pussy and clit. Amy proceeded to lick the Minotaur’s cum out of Toshia, while her chin pressed against Toshia’s clit. Wriggling a little in delight, Toshia noticed that the Minotaur’s horns were just over her head, and just the right distance apart… She reached up and took hold of them, using them to hold herself in place over Amy’s mouth. In this way the three of them formed a triangle, connected at Amy’s mouth and Toshia’s pussy, Toshia’s hands and the Minotaur’s horns, and the Minotaur’s huge cock and Amy’s pussy. Like this they swayed and worked together, each of them getting closer and closer to orgasmic release.Toshia found the sight of that enormous cock sliding in and out of Amy to be incredibly erotic, in part because she was having a hard time with the fact that her own tiny little body had taken that thing in so wonderfully well. She swayed there, between Amy’s talented tongue and the Minotaur’s horns, watching Amy’s beautiful pale and perfectly curved body getting plundered by this mythical beast with its dark, monstrous cock, and remembered that that same thing had just a short while ago had fucked her as vigorous and filled her with its thick, sweet cum, which Amy now had so eagerly licked and sucked out of her.“Oh, fuck!” Toshia sighed. Then she cried out as she came again, pushing down on Amy’s mouth as the explosion of delight swept over her in intense, fiery waves. She held on to the bull’s horns as she shook and shuddered.Then Amy and the Minotaur were coming, moaning and grunting loudly in the clearing. Toshia managed to get off Amy’s face without taking her eyes off the image of the two bodies coupling in passionate carnal union. As Amy shuddered through the tail end of her orgasm, she moaned, “Oh, that was wonderful!”Toshia smiled down at her friend, and leaned down to give her a long kiss, enjoying the taste of herself on Amy’s mouth. After a moment, Amy sighed and Toshia looked down to see that the Minotaur had pulled out of Amy’s pussy. There was a long rope of white cum hanging between the head of his cock and Amy.“Yum!” Toshia exclaimed and quickly crawled to the edge of the carpet. She caught hold of the Minotaur’s hip and urged him closer. When he obliged, she sucked the head of his cock half-way into her mouth, simultaneously getting a mouthful of delicious cum and getting her face covered with the stuff. After sucking down several good swallows of jizz from the Minotaur’s cock, Toshia lowered her mouth to Amy’s messy cunt and began to suck and lick up every bit of Minotaur cum she could find. Amy happily encouraged Toshia, even to the point of gently rolling the both of them over into a 69, with Amy on top, so every drop of the mingled Minotaur’s juice and her own would run down into Toshia’s mouth and onto her face. Of course, Amy also took the opportunity to go back to licking Toshia, this time directly concentrating on her clit.While they were engaged with each other like this, they were very close to hanging off the edge of the floating carpet. The Minotaur, who apparently felt left out, took advantage of this situation and came back over to press the head of his big, brown cock between Amy’s legs, between Amy’s pussy and Toshia’s mouth. With a little help from Toshia and the Minotaur, Amy adjusted her hips so he could enter her again, while Toshia could continue licking Amy’s clit.Toshia lay there on her back, having her pussy and clit licked by Amy, who was being fucked from behind by a big man-bull, while Toshia was herself tonguing Amy’s clit and the underside of the beast’s hard shaft. It didn’t take much of this before Amy was coming again for the third time. Toshia followed soon after, gasping and moaning underneath Amy. Then, to Toshia’s surprise, the Minotaur was coming again as well. His cock swelled in front of her eyes and she watched as he pumped cum up into Amy. Of course, there wasn’t enough room for all that cum, so it spilled out around that big cock down onto Toshia’s face and into her eager mouth.She tried to catch it all, but when he pulled out of Amy, very slowly, a flood of the sticky, delicious stuff ran out into her mouth and all over her face. Laughing, Toshia did her best to lick Amy clean, but it was no use; there was just too much, and it was all over the place.Amy moved around so that she could help Toshia out, licking and sucking up as much of the cum as she could, or helping scoop it up for Toshia to slurp down.When they were as done as they were likely to get, the two women sat up and noticed the Minotaur was standing by, watching them. His cock was now, finally, deflated.“I like your friend,” Amy grinned. “Can we keep him?”“He certainly does have some good qualities, doesn’t he?” Toshia smiled. Then, as she hopped off the carpet, she asked the Minotaur, “Do you have something like a club? You know, a big stick you could use to knock things around.”He looked back at her in apparent confusion, so she looked around for a moment, found a good sized stick and showed him what she had in mind. He seemed to understand and headed off into the forest.“We better get cleaned up before he comes back with another hard-on,” Toshia laughed.As she dropped off the carpet, Amy said, “Oh, that reminds me, I have your clothes with me.”“Clothes,” Toshia said as she stepped into the cold water of the stream, “I remember those.”While they washed the sweat and cum off, Amy said, “I was supposed to just fly around the area out of sight for a while, and then go back to see if the others needed help, but then I saw you and your friend.”“Well, we better go see if we can help them out,” Toshia smiled. “Those women are bad asses and probably have Don tied up and whipped or something already.”By the time they had pulled their clothes on over their damp bodies, the Minotaur had returned, carrying what looked like the trunk of a small tree.“Can we leave that carpet here?” Toshia asked.
AP correspondent Norman Hall reports on a work stoppage in St. Louis to support a black man who found a noose at work.
Another daylight shooting with fatality on the interstate - do you worry about this sort of thing when you're driving around with your family?
A Bridge of AdversityA 5-part story By Blind_Justice & Loqui Sordida Ad Me. Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Novels.The sky was still dark when they dragged Unami from her hut. A plump midwife, purring quietly, carried her newborn, Kra'ar, away while the hunters herded her up the steep ascent to the ancient temple. Unami was too exhausted from giving birth, too tired to bite and claw, so she let them do as they pleased.Through the great hall they went, empty save for the fire pit in the center and the twisted columns trying to stem the weight of the temple’s crumbling roof, down into a chamber she had never seen before. A singular oil lamp provided scant illumination, barely enough to see the carvings adorning every inch of the walls. Gaping maws, unblinking eyes leveling accusing stares, and half-formed limbs danced along the frieze.She clutched her aching belly and lashed the hunters to either side of her with an imperious stare. “Kra'ar needs me,” she growled. “I must feed my son.”Stone doors on the opposite side of the room opened, the towering slates scratching along the floor with some reluctance. Three elders emerged, their grayed whiskers and blunt snouts hidden behind ornate golden masks, their heads bloated and deformed by feathered headdresses. Long, colorful robes had been wrought around their slumping shoulders and withered groins.“What do you want from me at this hour?” Unami barked, masking her fear with feigned rage. She bared her teeth, a challenge rising in her throat. Her growl echoed off the carved walls. Unami slapped the hunters’ claws away and stood alone, shaking like a defiant, storm-tossed reed.“Silence!” one of the elders barked. The mask he wore was the sharp-beaked Condor, keen eyes and mighty wings. “Do you not grasp the gravity of your situation, whelp?”“Who do you call a whelp, you decrepit fossil?” Unami snarled. “I have just delivered my firstborn! I have seen the jungle! I have-”“You have stolen our sacred treasure and given it to an outsider!” the second elder roared. His mask showed the Serpent, venomous fangs and crushing strength. “Once they realize what can be found here, they will come and demand more and more! First they will bring honeyed words and lies, then they will bring warriors and weapons!”“Ha!” Unami spat. “First they would have to cross the jungle. Don’t you teach that only the strong, only the hunters can brave the hostile wilderness? How many outsiders will perish on the journey? How many of them will be able to even lift a weapon if they even find us? How many will be able to stand against our fierce warriors?”“Insolent child,” the third elder hissed. He wore a skull, the guise of Death Inevitable. “Traditions and rules have a reason. Your reckless actions prove why not every member of the tribe can be a hunter. Strength has to be tempered by wisdom, fury tempered by mercy. Your brash disregard of the rules clearly shows you are nothing more than a foolish whelp still, unfit to walk among the adults!”“I have followed the rules. I came back to give the tribe another hunter. What else do you want from me?”“Kra'ar will be well-fed and taken care of,” Condor proclaimed. “But your penance has only just begun.”“Normally we would bind you in stones and drown you in the swamp, as befits a lowly thief,” Condor said.“But the volcano’s awakening has roused The Sleeper,” Serpent said. “Someone has to placate him. This is a task for a woman. You have been chosen as penance for your transgression.”“What? No. I will go into exile. I will return to Aelric! I want to see the frozen water come from the sky!” Unami howled.“I am afraid you won’t leave the temple, foolish, insolent child,” Death Inevitable whispered. “Giving birth to a hunter does not absolve your sins. It is your solemn duty to the tribe. But if you can placate The Sleeper, all will be forgiven.”“All will be forgiven,” the other two rumbled. Condor bowed his head and the hunters grasped her shivering arms.“Placate The Sleeper? I am no priestess!” Unami wailed. “What am I to do?”Death Inevitable crossed the chamber, reaching into the gaping maw of a hideous stone effigy. His paw depressed the sculpted tongue within and the floor opened before her like a ravenous maw.“Deliver her,” Serpent said, motioning for the pit. The air wafting from the orifice smelled wrong. Sweet and thick was the scent, causing her ravaged sex to weep in heat.The hunters first dragged, then shoved her forwards. Unami stumbled into the pit and fell. Like every member of the tribe she knew how to fall, even if her weakened body was slow and clumsy. Instead of breaking her legs, she curled up into a ball and dropped onto a slope of smooth stone. There were no holds, no purchase for her claws or scrabbling feet. Unami slid frantically into the lightless depths underneath the temple. Above her, the floor rumbled closed.The slope curled downward like the blasted serpent before delivering her into a lightless space that she judged huge by the sound of emptiness. The sweet stench was thicker here. Her teats ached and her sex seemed to overflow. Her breath threw shuddering echoes from the far walls.Blind like a newborn, Unami pawed on all fours, trying to earn a feel for this space. The floor was made from stone, large, regular tiles neatly fitted. The tip of her tail still touched the slope and there was no wall in easy reach. She took another step. Her paw landed on a bone. Unami gritted her teeth. She would not grant the elders the satisfaction of hearing her scream. She pulled the bone closer. It was long and stout. It would make a fine club.There was a soft noise ahead, a shy rustling.A grim smile stole onto Unami’s lips. If there were animals down here, they would probably be as blind as she was and easily hunted. At least she wouldn’t starve.“Come, come, little ratty,” Unami sang. “Mother has need of you.”The rustling came again, closer now. Using her sensitive ears, Unami aimed and swung the bone with murderous intent.There was swift movement, a powerful whiff of that sticky, sweet air. The cudgel hit the floor with crushing force and splintered into a thousand pieces like a hollowed twig.More rustling. Four, five sounds of movement at once. Unami bared her claws and teeth. How many rats were there?Something long and serpentine curled around her leg. It was soft and wet and moved with shocking speed, coiling around her calf and knee.Then came a jolt and she was unceremoniously dropped on her back. All Unami could do was to protect her head by twisting her spine and curling up as best she could. The impact cracked a few ribs and her elbows.Gasping in the thick, clingy vapors, she slapped at the soft, writhing tissue grasping her leg. Another tendril came, slick and wet and it curled around her other leg. With inexorable force, they pried her thighs apart. Shrieking, Unami clamped both hands over her gaping sex - to no avail. Another tendril came, binding her wrists and yanking her hands aside with contemptuous ease.She wasn’t sure if the fall had rocked her head or if she really heard it, but there was a low, growling noise. It grew louder and louder, mounting in front of her. She couldn’t see! She could only hear the noise, writhe as the tendrils slithered over her. No, not over, but into her! One, then two invaded her, probing at her ravaged insides.The gurgling stopped on a strange note. For one breathless moment Unami thought to hear a wordless question. The disgusting tendrils withdrew from her insides, leaving her spread open and shivering in the chamber’s rank air.Then the noise returned, loud and angry and so very close.A mighty weight settled onto her helpless body, covering her feet, legs, belly, chest and finally her snout. She sank her teeth into soft, warm tissue, tearing long, weeping gashes into malleable flesh. The noise changed as hitherto closed orifices gaped, adding a horrific wheezing to the cacophony.Unami added her own incoherent screams as acid poured from numerous maws, burning her limbs, dissolving her helpless body until nothing remained but a sweet-smelling puddle of goo.The Sleeper lapped at it, a satisfied purr echoing off the walls.Shala’s patience grew thin. What hope of finding Kelgore had she if these fools that carried her fell victim to some easily avoided calamity and left her stranded in this gods-forsaken wilderness?She had tumbled from the whore’s back as the claws of a dead man seized the crude pack full of carrion and tore it away. She could not see how her captors fared against the undead horde until the fop had knocked her aside to hastily gather the scattered meat and supplies.The buffoon’s man and the traitor both fell to the horde of corpses that had dragged themselves from the haunted swamp. Shala feared for a moment that all of her captors might perish and leave her stranded in the mud. But the whore fought bravely and well. With axe and sword she hacked a path through the grasping hands of the hungry dead. The fop followed in her wake and the buffoon held a lackluster rearguard.Almost as an afterthought, he reached down and plucked her out of the muck by her hair. The leather strap that secured her gag shifted, but only slightly.It would have been so easy to turn back the horde with just the right words of power and a bit of fire and flesh. But it would require hands that Shala did not yet have.She watched as the buffoon’s sword lodged in the ribs of a flanking corpse and the thing reached for him with rotting hands. She tried to scream in furious protest as the impudent fool swung her like a flail, slamming her skull against the head of the accursed ghoul. Through some intervention of the fate spinners, the impact knocked her gag askew.Working her tongue and jaw, Shala was finally able to spit out the shard of wood and let the leather strap fall away, just as the buffoon tucked her up under his arm.Shala nearly cried out at the insolence, but then she caught a tantalizing whiff of blood. There was a gash on the buffoon’s arm. The blood coagulated against her cheek, but her tongue could not reach. She was jostled in his grip as the buffoon ran limping after his companions, stumbling and fumbling blindly through the jungle boscage. Bit by bit she shifted until she could press her thin lips right to the wound, and taste the ferric tang on her tongue.“You can stop now,” Shala called out, once she had lapped her fill of the buffoon’s essence. “Do you hear me? You’ve fled beyond the reach of the dead.”“And why should we believe you?” asked the whore, panting. Before Shala could answer, the whore added “Joras, find another gag.”“Because if you die then I am abandoned out here. Do you think this is how I wish to end my existence? Lying in the muck, helpless as the scavengers pick at my flesh until nothing is left? My only chance at life is if you reunite me with my son. While you may well choose to slay me once my usefulness is done, I’ll take a slim chance over no chance at all, and help you where I can.”The fop scoffed. “And what help can a disembodied witch offer?”“While you dithered at a crossroads, I felt the jungle life fade away before the great predator that stalked you. And you ignored my warnings,” Shala spat.“I alone recognized the rancid scent of death tinged with the ozone of magic and knew the undead were nearby. But again you ignored me and two of your number paid for your negligence with their lives. How many more will die because a reckless whore refuses to heed my counsel?”“Your point is made,” the whore growled. “There is no need for more insults.”“Oh, do my words hurt your poor little pride? Perhaps you’d feel better if you were gagged and hauled around like chattel.” The whore glowered at her, but did not retort. “I have eyes to see and senses attuned to powers from beyond the veil. Give me a mouth to speak and heed my counsel and your chances of living to find Kelgore will improve! You’ve lost two pairs of eyes already. Are you so foolish as to throw away a third?”“I don’t trust it or its counsel,” the whore said. Being referred to so coarsely would have raised the bile in Shala’s throat, if she had bile, or more than an inch of throat. She let the insult pass.“Neither do I,” agreed the buffoon. “But I have known many men I did not trust, and I have never known it to be a lie when a man says ‘I want to live’.”“Our resources are few enough,” the fop agreed. “I don’t think we’d be any worse off if she betrays us.”“Fine,” agreed the whore through gritted teeth. “But if you lead us into danger, I shall smash you with a rock before I die. Understood?”“Agreed." Shala swallowed her pride."Unless our new advisor knows of a safer camp, I think we should get some rest,” the whore decided. “Joras, skin our dinner. Ambrose, see if you can spark a fire. I’ll gather you some wood. Shala…” she paused as if it pained her to speak the words. “You’re on watch.”In the distance, from every direction, the drums continued.In the chamber above The Sleeper’s lair, Condor sighed. “One malnourished whelp won’t do, you know?”Death Inevitable touched his golden forehead. “The Sleeper is mightily displeased indeed. Unami was but a morsel for it.”“At least his hunger will be sated for the moment,” Serpent muttered. “We might find a bit of respite tonight.”Together, the elders returned to the great hall. The rumble of the drums was loud and clear, reverberating from the walls.Condor cocked his head. “A hunting party returns. They have brought an outsider.”“Fortunate tidings indeed,” Serpent said, a smile in his voice. “The Sleeper might feast again shortly.”“Let us see what the hunters have brought then,” Death Inevitable purred. “Hopefully this new sacrifice will send The Sleeper back to sleep. I dread the day when the temple and the offerings can’t contain its might no longer. The Sleeper might devour reality itself.”“If it is an outsider woman, we should avail ourselves of her services before tossing her into the Pit,” Condor said. “To make sure The Sleeper will be properly serviced, of course.”Chuckling softly, the elders headed for the exit, eager to meet their next sacrifice.As dawn broke, they strode into the village. Hunters prepared for another expedition into the jungle, sharpening their spears or wrapping rations. Passing females, their young scurrying between their feet, offered bows of respect. The midwife clutched Unami’s newborn to her bosom, allowing the pale blond whelp to suck at her teat.“Let’s hope the outsider was strong,” Death Inevitable muttered. “His offspring looks disgusting, so pale.”“We will see in a few years’ time,” Serpent said. “Ah, there they are.” He gestured towards a tangle of tribesmen, clustered around the hunting party. Adults and whelps alike muttered among themselves.“As if they’ve seen an outsider for the first time,” Death Inevitable murmured. “How different can they be?”The knot of tribesmen split, allowing the elders their first glance at the outsider. He stood unbound, surrounded by three hunters who gazed upon him in open admiration. The fourth, a female, had her tail raised high, the scent of her cunt announcing to all downwind how desperate in need of a thorough railing she was. The outsider was odd. Too scrawny to be a warrior, he nonetheless bore himself with the stance of a chieftain. What little fur he wore on his head was long, slick and the color of night. But most odd were his eyes, featureless black orbs of night. He raised his voice, speaking the strange words of the outsiders. None understood the strange syllables he used, but all felt the power radiating through his voice. It commanded their full attention. Transfixed, the elders, the tribesmen, the women and whelps watched, their gazes fixed on the strange man. Each one of them he bathed in his obsidian gaze and one by one they became his unquestioning servants. Not even the Sleeper could help them now.“Stop it!” Ambrose screamed into the night. “Stop the fucking drumming all day and all fucking night. Just fucking stop it!”The distant drum beat continued unabated by the outburst. The sonorous rhythm had followed them from the beach, through the jungle, surrounding them, moving with them like the stench of a beggar. They had tried more than once to follow the sound and find one of the natives, but always the drum they approached fell silent and a distant drum joined the chorus.“What do you want?!” Ambrose continued, stalking from one edge of their campfire light to the other, yelling into the darkness at the top of his voice. “Do you want us to go? Do you want us to follow? We don’t know what the drums mean! We use words! Do you hear me? Words! Show yourselves and tell us what you want! Kill us or capture us if you must, but for the love of all that is holy, stop the gods-damned drumming!”His injured foot throbbed. His whole body ached. Nicks and cuts and lacerations bedeviled his face and arms after being thrashed through the underbrush by that slavering beast. The midges and mites of the swamp had fed on him mercilessly and if it hadn’t been for Tsonia and Joras, the shambling dead would have finished him, just as they had poor Montu and Sethos. Ambrose was a man of the sea. The perils of this mad and alien landscape perturbed his senses and flustered his wits.“It’s not even good drumming, damn it!” Ambrose saw Tsonia and Joras scowling in the firelight at his agitated pacing. He didn’t know if his ranting had awakened them, or if they like he had laid awake, unable to sleep with the constant racket. “A poxy toddler banging on his mother’s pot with a spoon can come up with a more inventive rhythm! But not you lot, no! Your primitive fucking brains can’t come up with anything more original than just bum bum bum over and over and over again and again and again!”He grabbed up a heavy stick from their dwindling pile of firewood and banged it back and forth in a forked tree trunk, bang, bang, bang, in time to the distant drums’ cadence.“You hear that? Huh? How do you like it? How about if I keep it up all fucking night so you can’t sleep?”“Peace, Ambrose,” Joras implored, rising to soothe his friend’s discomfiture. “This raving does no good and it wastes the vitality you’ll want for tomorrow.”“I don’t care!” Ambrose screamed, and continued to beat the tree trunk. “I don’t fucking care anymore. I want them to stop or to show themselves or to attack us or something! Anything! Anything but this infernal drumming! It makes me wish I had drowned, Joras! I would rather die with the sound of the sea in my ears than live another hour beset by this ceaseless racket.”“I know it’s trying,”“Trying!? It’s maddening! This whole damn place is maddening!” Ambrose’s arm gave out at last and he let fall the stave from his hand even as he collapsed to his knees with a sob of exasperation. “Why won’t you stop!?” he cried again into the darkness. "Why won’t you show yourselves!?“"You are loud,” grunted a coarse voice in the simple words of the Trade Tongue used among sailors. Into the firelight stepped a tall native, his mottled green fur broken in places by ancient scars. His hands, though tipped with razor sharp claws, were empty, and held out in a gesture of parley.Tsonia, lithe as a panther, came to her feet with blade in hand, ready to smite the intruder. The towering, beast-headed native dodged and came to face Tsonia, still empty-handed. A leather bandolier bisected his broad chest. Spears and a pack rested on his back while a woven cord around his waist was hung with pouches, a sling and dagger and a simple loincloth.“We will fight,” he growled. “First, I will make the drums quiet for your loud friend.”The fire-haired warrior stayed her blade, curious to see what the newcomer would do next. “Slow,” she told him, speaking the same pidgin trade language. “I am watching.”The native bared his fangs, his ears perking up. Tsonia wasn’t sure if he was threatening her or if that was the stranger’s idea of a grin. Slowly, he reached for the pack he had slung over his back and placed it on the ground in front of him.“Watch,” the stranger said, kneeling. He opened a flap and pulled a small drum from his pack, which he struck in a certain rhythm, bam, bam, rap. He repeated the cadence, then again. And around them, the drums echoed the new beat, and fell silent. In the distance, the sonorous rumble continued, but in their immediate vicinity, there was nothing but the wind rustling in the trees and the occasional chirp of surprised nighttime birds.“What did you, say?” Joras asked, intrigued. Next to him, Ambrose sighed. The exhausted sailor settled down with his back against a tree, and despite his curiosity his head fell onto his chest almost immediately.The native offered Joras the same strange visage, open jaws and hanging tongue. “I found what I want. I need quiet to, see, watch, find,” he seemed to be searching for a word.“Hunt?" Joras asked, backing away from the beastman."Yes. Hunt.” the stranger agreed. “They are quiet. They will listen.”“Hunt, eh?” Tsonia sneered. “Will you, make us sick with, small spears?” She held up a finger and thumb spaced about two inches apart to show how small the darts were. Tsonia also struggled to find appropriate words in a vocabulary meant for trade and barter, but she lowered neither her guard nor the sword.The stranger sank onto his haunches, his dark eyes reflecting the flickering flames of the campfire. “No small spears. I am proud. I do not hunt with small spears.”“Your people are not proud two yesterdays,” Tsonia growled. The Trade Tongue didn’t concern itself with such lofty concepts as the past or the future. It was a language for discussing the here and now. “They hunt me with small spears by the good water. They make me sick.”“My tribe who hunt are not smart two yesterdays. Many outsiders come to our beaches and cannot leave again over many moons. My tribe thinks you are weak and not smart, like the other outsiders.”So they were not the first sailors to be marooned on these shores, Tsonia realized. Clearly the native had learned the Trade Tongue from somewhere, so castaways must be fairly common. It did not bode well for them that none had ever returned to tell the story of this place.The stranger hissed several times in quick succession. Maybe a laugh?“You kill two of my tribe. They know they made a mistake so they choose to hunt easy outsiders.” His eyes roamed over Tsonia and she could hear his satisfied purr. “I hunt you.”Tsonia raised an eyebrow. “Me?”“Two of my tribe are dead. I want, the death price.”Tsonia sighed. He wanted revenge for the two natives she had killed. The stranger before her was no savage. He obviously had intelligence and honor, perhaps even wisdom. But she didn’t have the vocabulary to explain such a complex situation, much less negotiate a peaceful solution.“Joras, you’re better with words than I,” she said in their native Thelyrian. “Tell him I killed two of his kind while driven half mad by their poison in my veins. Ask him why he thinks he can beat me now when I have my wits fully about me.”There was a struggle over words as Joras and the stranger exchanged the terms they knew and agreed to what they meant. Tsonia was beginning to regret involving her friend in the conversation. As her patience grew thin, he seemed to be enjoying the give and take and the accomplishment of finally conveying the whole idea.Again, the stranger laughed. “I watch you yesterday and two yesterdays, fire-hair. I watch you fight. I watch you walk far. You are tired, so I offer a bargain.”“Kaela…” Joras implored in Thelyrian, his voice laden with dread. “Don’t do anything foolish, please.”“I haven’t agreed to anything just yet.” Tsonia snorted in exasperation. “Are you blaming me for our misery too?”“I would never-” Joras began.“Let him talk then,” Tsonia snapped. “And don’t call me Kaela in front of everyone!”The stranger placed his clawed hand upon his chest. “I am called T'pek.” His voice, although struggling with the Trade Tongue, had a formal, almost ritualistic tone about it.Tsonia bowed her head. “I am called Red Tsonia. What do you offer?”“I ask you to fight, Red Tsonia. You owe me two hunters.”“You-kill-me is not equal to two hunters. They will not live if I die,” Tsonia said. It was another hard concept to convey, but she’d be damned if she was going to let Joras spend all night trying to negotiate poetically. “I see, a fight for pride, is a waste. A waste for me. A waste for you.”T'pek bared his fangs again. “We will fight. If I win, you will be, my tribe.” T'pek immediately waved away that idea as if it wasn’t exactly what he meant to say. “Just my tribe,” he amended, thumping his own chest.“Mate?” offered Joras. It was a Vizangian word that had made it into the Trade Tongue and was used to refer to any woman a man had sex with, be she joined by holy ritual, or just a concubine, slave, or whore.“Yes!” T'pek agreed. "Mate. You will be my mate. We will make strong children. My tribe will get more than two hunters.“A laugh escaped Tsonia’s lips. "You are too proud, T'pek. You are too proud of your fighting skill and your fucking skill. What will I get if you lose?”“I do not insult you, but you are slow and loud. You walk like blind and deaf children. You see bad signs but you still go forward. You risk weak people.” T'pek nodded towards battered, blissfully snoring Ambrose. “I offer that I will lead you and be smart for you, And I will also give you children.” He caressed his loincloth.Tsonia laughed again, a full-bellied sound of unbridled mirth. “You are smart. If you lose, you still fuck me. Is that right?”“A good hunter is strong and smart,” T'pek said with that uncanny grin.“Your tribe, Where do they take 'easy’ outsiders?” Tsonia asked. “What do they do with him?”“My tribe take your outsiders to our village. The leaders decide outsiders’ fate.” T'pek shook his head.“How many outsiders go to your leaders?” Joras interjected. “What do they say to your leaders?”“Some want to trade. Some are held to work. Some breed. Some fight.”“The unlucky ones are tossed into the swamp,” Tsonia added darkly in Thelyrian. Her brow creased in thought. “If I win, you will lead us to your village. You will teach us about your tribe and the village.”“Yes." Said T'pek."If I lose, I will be your mate, right?”An eager nod set T'pek’s mane aflutter.“Will I stay here,” Tsonia indicated their campsite with a sweep of her hand, “until I make children?”“No,” T'pek said with emphasis. “You will be my mate in the village. My people will take care of you. I will protect you and love you.”“If I lose, will they stay here?” she asked, indicating Joras and Ambrose.“I will take them to the village,”“For our fate to be decided by some chieftain or shaman or council we have no knowledge of?” Joras interrupted in Thelyrian. He sought Tsonia’s gaze. A flicker of dread was clearly visible. “I have a bad feeling about this.”The fire-haired warrior rose to her feet and planted her sword into the ground. “We have a deal, T'pek. How will we settle our fight? I will not be your mate if I am dead. You will not lead us if you are dead.”“No,” T'pek agreed, undoing his cord and placing the dagger, sling and pouches atop his pack. “We will stop when one of us is not proud and says 'stop’. Your people will know the agreement.”“'Yield’ is the word you want,” Tsonia said, watching the beastman strip away his kit. “We will stop when you yield or I yield.”“Yield." T'pek nodded his agreement and unknotted his loincloth, letting his manhood hang free."I believe he means to distract me by waving his lance in my face,” Tsonia joked to Joras in Thelyrian.“Yes, well, it’s distracting me quite nicely,” he agreed.“You show weakness there,” Tsonia pointed to T'pek’s naked crotch. His face scrunched into a look that Tsonia interpreted as indignation and realized he had taken her warning as an insult to his masculinity. “No, no, no,” she waved in correction and sought a better word. “Soft? Um, bad fight place?”Comprehension dawned on T'pek’s face and he snorted. “I will have no burden. Nothing to grab. Children of my tribe learn to fight with nothing.” His grappling gesture put Tsonia in mind of the formalized wrestling that was taught in the Green Cities. "Only fur. Belts hold tools. Packs hold food and water. They are bad for fighting.“So these people fought their duels of honor naked. It wasn’t a totally foreign concept. There were stories of great heroes from ages past who also dueled in the nude. It certainly ensured that neither party carried any hidden weapons.Tsonia pulled off her tattered chain hauberk with a resigned sigh. "Why have clothes at all then?” she asked, gesturing to the discarded loincloth lying on the ground in the firelight.T'pek’s gaze roamed over her rosy skin like a lover’s caress. He barked with mirth. “Soft,” he said, gesturing to his groin. “Weak. Sharp plants and rocks and bugs are bad. But Red Tsonia is good. It is strong for Red Tsonia.”“You are too proud, T'pek,” she smirked.Tsonia’s chain skirt hit the ground with the soft rattling of metal on packed earth. She tossed her armor at Joras’ feet and began to circle the camp site, taking the muscular native’s measure as he fell into step opposite her. He was taller than her, with wider shoulders and longer arms. Some earlier fight had left his chest and shoulder marked with ghastly scars, the otherwise lustrous fur refused to fully grow back there. Her lips curled into a playful grin as her gaze wandered lower, over his fur-covered abdomen and towards his groin. The fur was almost black there, long and shaggy and nowhere enough to cover a prodigious member which proudly curved towards his navel. His oddly bent legs didn’t seem to hinder his movement one bit and his sinuously weaving tail allowed him to easily keep balance.“If you want the death price for your tribe, you will fight me,” Tsonia remarked. “If you just look at me and I just look at you, we will not fight all night.” A smile flickered across her lips. “Or would you like to just look at me?” She caressed one of her breasts.The next moment, T'pek was on her, effortlessly closing the distance in one ferocious leap. His bulk tore Tsonia off her feet and together they crashed to the ground. Strong hands closed around her arm, one above and below the elbow each and when the world stopped spinning, Tsonia was face down in the dirt, with T'pek’s clawed foot between her shoulder blades and her arm bent at a very uncomfortable angle.She had clearly underestimated her opponent’s speed and reach, but he didn’t know any of her true strength either. Tsonia bucked, hard, unbalancing T'pek. For a heartbeat, his grip on her arm waned and she rolled, tearing her arm free, not caring if his claws tore open her back or the arm creaked in its socket. The sharp jabs of pain, if anything, only fuelled her battle-lust.In the time it took T'pek to regain his balance, Tsonia came to her feet. She was upon him, a blur of fists and kicks as she employed every trick she had gleaned from the fist-fighters in the Xhastrian coliseums. T'pek blocked some of her blows, took others with merely a grunt of annoyance and countered others. If he pulled any punches, Tsonia didn’t notice.One blow hit her clavicle, cracking it with the sickening sound of bone on bone. T'pek grunted, shaking out his rattled fist. Tsonia dove in, landing a solid hit to his gut which sent T'pek stumbling backwards.“Lift me up higher,” she heard Shala jeer. “I can’t see a damn thing!”“Shush you,” Joras muttered. “Don’t make this any more awkward.”Shala’s gleeful cackling gave T'pek pause. His eyes widened in horror as he beheld the disembodied head, held aloft by a disgusted Joras. Tsonia pressed her advantage, following up her attack with a furious shoulder charge.T'pek’s tail slapped across her breasts, leaving a stinging line of fire across them. Tsonia, not even fazed by the attack, barreled into him with enough force to spill both of them to the ground again. She pinned T'pek’s arms to the ground with her knees, her forearm firmly lodged under his maw, pressing hard against his throat.“Yield,” Tsonia hissed, putting her weight onto her arm. T'pek’s maw hung open, his tongue lolling to one side, his eyes rolling madly in their sockets. Suddenly, there was a soft sensation writhing between her thighs, tickling her sex. Tsonia’s hand flashed downwards, closing around T'pek’s nimble tail. Her tight grip elicited a hoarse yelp from the prone beastkin. Too late she realized how much of an advantage she had squandered. T'pek growled, fighting against her weight into a sitting position. Tsonia evaded a vicious head-butt by rolling backwards.Gasping, she came to her feet. T'pek followed suit, albeit a bit slower.“You, are strong,” he gasped. “You are tired, from two yesterdays, but you are strong. How?”“It will take more than a primeval forest and some rotting dead to wear me down,” Tsonia snarled in Thelyrian, then added for T'pek “You are not weak, T'pek, but not strong like me. Do you yield?”“No,” the beastkin growled something else in his own language, shaking his head in defiance. “I will make you yield!” He raised his fists.“Many people try to make me yield,” she spat. “All have failed.”“I will be the first,” T'pek roared, pouncing again.This time, Tsonia was ready. As he came flying, jaws open, hands ready to grasp and wrestle, she intercepted him. One hand caught his wrist, just behind his splayed claw, the other dug into the thick fur by his loins. Her demonic blood roared as Tsonia redirected his momentum, sending T'pek crashing to the ground back first. Breath exploded from the stunned beastkin in a hollow bark. Tsonia didn’t wait for him to recover, instead she mounted his hips, trapping his throbbing lance between them and pinning his arms to the ground with brute strength.“Yield,” Tsonia gasped. His lance underneath her was already drenched and she had to force herself from grinding herself against its searing heat.“No,” T'pek growled, trying to raise his arms. He could have tried to uproot a tree with his gaze alone, the effect was much the same.“Yield, you oaf,” Tsonia snarled. In Thelyrian she added “I could break your bones like rotted driftwood if I so desired.”“I am proud. I will not,” T'pek gasped as Tsonia ground herself against him, a languid, lust-driven roll of her full hips.“But you are worthless to me as a cripple,” Tsonia purred, then in the simple Trade Tongue she said “If I yield and you yield, we both get what we really want.” She reached backwards, guiding his shaft. Her sex swallowed his tip eagerly. T'pek’s breath caught in his throat as she claimed the full length of his spear.Tsonia’s voracious appetite, never easy to sate, had grown tremendously during their weeks at sea without any privacy and no suitable lovers. She had pondered asking Ambrose for a rowing slave or three, but even she knew how much trouble that could cause in the volatile confines of a warship. Not even pleasuring herself was an option, not with dozens of eager men devouring her every move. Not that she minded an audience, but again, the discipline aboard and the hope of finding and apprehending Kelgore had been more important than her own pleasure. Now, with T'pek writhing under her, she could finally indulge! She pushed herself away from him, only to reclaim his monstrous pole in a slow, breath-stealing descent.T'pek’s growl was the only warning she got. Too late Tsonia realized that she had relinquished her death grip on his wrists, to play with her tits and finger her clit as she rode his massive shaft.“No!” the beastman snarled. His claws slid under her ass and he pushed her away.“No?” Tsonia gasped, coming to her knees.“My tribe do not fuck this way,” T'pek growled, towering over her, his glistening shaft pointing at her.Tsonia glared at him. “What-?” she began, but T'pek was on her again, forcing her onto hands and knees. Before Tsonia could even protest his rough handling, his teeth clamped onto her shoulder, his clawed hands carved furrows into her hips as he roughly adjusted her position.Tsonia relaxed, anticipating what would happen next. T'pek did not disappoint. His bulbous tip forced her rosy curtains apart and in one fell swoop, he buried his sword to the hilt in her, his hot breath and spittle pouring down her shoulder. Tsonia wailed as he pounded into her, but it was no cry of pain, the demonic cock of Q'alan had more than seasoned her nethers. If anything, T'pek’s proud lance was a potent reminder of what she had been missing ever since the God-King had tasked her with finding and killing Kelgore.“Yes,” Tsonia growled, pushing back her hips on his next thrust. T'pek grunted with the effort of keeping her pinned beneath him, his spear slashing deep into her hungry tunnel. His claws found her breast, roughly kneading her supple flesh. Another wail tore from her lips, once more she pushed back against him. Blissful release tore through her already and every thrust only heightened her delirious ecstasy.“More!” Tsonia howled, answering each of T'pek’s thrusts with a roll of her hips. His furry sack slapped against her with blistering abandon each time he bottomed out. Hot blood trickled down her shoulder, his teeth sunk deep into her flesh.Tsonia tossed back her head, jubilating at the pain, the pleasure tearing through her body. T'pek’s tail slapped her ass, the squirming appendage caressing the valley between her cheeks like a second phallus. His paw mauled her breasts, but she only spurred him on with wordless moans and grunts. Another climax tore through her.Tsonia reared up, heedless of T'pek’s considerable bulk, heedless of his teeth sunk into her shoulder. She needed all of his delicious cock, buried deep within her hungry cunt!T'pek suddenly opened his jaws, his shockingly large tongue lapping at the bloody gashes his teeth had dug. He whined in surprise as the black blood oozing from the wounds seared his tongue.Tsonia rode him like a woman possessed, driving herself onto his shaft for all she was worth. Their bodies made lewd, slapping and squishing sounds as they collided.Suddenly, T'pek slammed his hands upon her hips and pinned her in place, his breath coming in unnaturally quick gasps. And then he erupted, spewing burst after burst of hot, sticky seed into Tsonia, filling her up to bursting and then more, leaking from their union in thick rivulets, dripping down into the ravaged earth.For a moment, there was nothing but the sounds of rasping breath and the occasional drip of thick liquid spattering on the ground.Then Shala raised her voice. “I hope you had your fun, whore. Can we go find my son now?”Ambrose groaned as the light of the relentless morning sun attacked his eyes. He sat up and blinked, trying to dislodge the grit caking his eyelids. The drums, although not entirely gone, had at least quieted down and were more akin to the volcano’s distant rumblings than the oppressive, maddening drone which had almost broken him. Joras slept behind him, the artist’s arm a soothing weight on his waist. Ambrose pushed some of Joras’ locks from his angelic face and breathed a kiss of thanks onto his prickly cheek.“Good morning.” The voice was Shala’s, a mirthless, venomous rasp. Her head rested on a tree stump nearby. “Please don’t start another round of fornication. I was forced to behold entirely too much of it last night.” She made a disgusted sound. “Just look at them. Animals, truly." Her tongue came out, a shriveled lump of flesh, and pointed to the side.Ambrose gently moved Joras’ arm and gazed in the indicated direction. On the other side of the stump, curled into a tangle of limbs, were Tsonia and a monstrous being, naked both and obviously spent. The newcomer had a bestial snout resting on her shoulder, a powerful paw cupped her ample breast. Tsonia had a satisfied grin on her features and the stranger’s cock wedged between her ass cheeks."Can you believe it? They had me keep watch the entire time.” Shala gnashed her teeth. “Twice I had to endure their vulgar rutting. After that, hours of boredom. If I had my hands back I would throttle that whore!”The stranger raised his head, alert eyes meeting Ambrose’s. “Explain why the head talks,” he growled. “And why you keep such a thing.” He looked down to Tsonia’s shoulder. Faint bite marks marred her otherwise fair skin. “She tastes like poison and death,” the stranger said, his fur bristling. “Why?”“I have questions of my own,” Ambrose said, his hand inching towards his cane. He doubted he would be a match for the stranger’s prowess, but he felt better with a weapon at the ready. “Who are you? What do you want from us?”“I am T'pek, the hunter,” the stranger said. “I came to challenge fire-hair. Tsonia.”“And then the whore allowed the beast to breed her. Twice at least,” Shala added.“How did I miss that?” Ambrose asked.Stories about Tsonia’s amorous exploits were as numerous and outlandish as those of her prowess on the field of battle. He chuckled softly, knowing at least one of them to be true. It involved him, Tsonia and Joras after all.That particular tale ended with the fire-haired vixen spurned and furious after she caught Ambrose and Joras, naked, sweaty and curled around each other after an afternoon of lovemaking in a nameless pirate inn. She had been so obsessed with sating her own desires, so fixated on bedding Ambrose that she did not, for one moment, consider that Joras’ classical beauty and his youthful body were much more to his liking than Tsonia’s carelessly presented curves.T'pek rose, his muscular frame easily towering above sitting Ambrose. With enviable grace, the beastkin crossed the small clearing they had chosen as their camp site and dug into a pile of gear. Carrying a small bundle in his paw, he returned to the stump and knelt down next to Ambrose.The captain forced himself to look anywhere but the stranger’s groin. He had to admit, T'pek’s form, though alien to his sensibilities, exuded power and virility he would find utterly irresistible under other circumstances. After all, curiosity was a prized trait in any explorer.T'pek offered the bundle. It was wound in thick, crimson leaves, with pale yellow and white ribs. The smell emanating from it was at the same time mouth-watering and stomach-churning.“Do I want to eat that?” Ambrose asked, a tad suspiciously.“Yes. Eat. You are hurt. It will help.” T'pek nudged the bundle into his hand.“He might be lying,” Shala spat in Xhastrian. “You and Joras are of no concern to him. All he cares for is-”The hunter turned on his heels, claws out. A dangerous, low growl escaped T'pek’s throat. The undead witch closed her mouth, spearing the beastkin with baleful glares instead.“What does it say?” asked T'pek, circling Shala’s perch as if looking for just the right angle to punt her into the treetops.“Treachery and insults that will get her smashed with a rock and then burned to ash if she isn’t careful,” Ambrose chastised Shala. To T'pek he said “She says bad words about you. Bad words about Tsonia.”“The bad words it says have no use. Why keep it?” T'pek asked again.“Uh, magic. Strong magic,” Ambrose said. He was well acquainted with the words of trade on his tongue, but they were usually spoken across a table over tankards of wine, or between two ships lashed together in the open sea, or between merchant caravans meeting at a crossroads. Hearing the words, simple and ineloquent as they were, spoken by the beastial newcomer gave him a disquieting sensation along the length of his spine. “She promised to bring us home with magic. If we find the man she wants,” he continued, fighting to keep a straight face. The bundle’s scent was becoming utterly vile the longer he held it.“Do you trust it?”Ambrose sighed. “We have no ship. We cannot build one. We can wait many many tomorrows and moons for a ship to come. Or we can gamble.” He wasn’t certain how to express the concept of 'Hope’ in the simple Trade Tongue so in his own words, to settle his own mind, he added. “I’ll take a little hope over no hope at all.”“We gamble,” he concluded to T'pek.Gathering all his courage, he bit into the bundle. Rancid juices poured into his mouth. Strange clumps of an alien texture were borne on that vile torrent, their taste unfathomable. Coughing, he dropped the morsel, trying to wipe sticky remains from his lips. They burned as if touched by Thelyrian devil’s peppers.“Are you trying to kill me?” he snarled, raising his cane. T'pek shook his head and left him, sputtering and close to retching.Joras stirred next to him, no doubt roused by his violent hacking. Tsonia woke up too, disheveled but alert. Her gaze swept the campsite. When she spotted no immediate danger, she fussed about the stains and dirt caking her naked skin. Eventually, she sighed and stood.“I will bring water,” she said, grabbing the water skins. “Good water is not far.”“I will lead you,” T'pek offered. “The jungle is hungry in the morning.”“Not as hungry as his appetite for her cunt,” Shala muttered to their backs, already halfway across the clearing. Aloud she said: “If you wanted succor for your injuries, sailor, you had but to ask. I can easily restore your lost vigor.”“The price will be higher than you’d wish to pay, Ambrose,” Joras warned, then turned to the witch’s severed head. “Besides, don’t you need hands to work your magic?”“Small minds ask stupid questions,” Shala sighed dramatically. “Not every spell requires elaborate gesticulation. Sometimes a sip of blood and a few well-chosen words are all that is needed to weave the powers of the ether into a useful tapestry.”“Do you trust her?” Joras asked, the second time Ambrose had heard the question this morning.Ambrose gnashed his teeth. Sleeping on the forest floor had done little to dull the numerous aches he harbored. His sprained ankle was a dull throb even when sitting, but he knew it would flare into a beacon of agony after another day of walking for miles on end. Every nick and cut he had suffered stung from his own sweat, every insects’ bite itched worse than the caress of a jellyfish’s tendril.“I’m at my wit’s end, Joras!” he sobbed. “On the sea, there is a time to wait for the wind to shift and fill your sails, and there is a time to break out the oars and row. The wind is not shifting, Joras. Unless you want to drag or carry me to whatever fate awaits us, I’m going to die here in this jungle, unless I row.”He limped to the tree stump and picked up Shala’s head with both hands. Holding her up to his face, he stared into her undead eyes. “Speak, witch. What do you need me to do?”“Kiss me, oh captain of the seas,” Shala purred. “It will be over in no time.” The witch started to mutter, knotty words not meant for mortal tongues.“You have to be joking!” Joras gasped. “Put your lips to that, thing?”“Either that or dying on a nameless jungle path,” Ambrose said, gritting his teeth. He puckered his lips and pulled the witch’s head close. Shala, having finished her incantation, gazed at him with pursed lips, her wicked eyes wide with anticipation.“There’s a good boy,” the witch cooed. “Be strong. It will be over very soon.”Her clammy, withered lips touched his. Then came her tongue, probing into his mouth. He tried to clench his teeth against the intrusion, but the glutinous texture of the organ so repulsed his sensibilities that his jaw opened in revulsion instead. He very nearly dropped her then, but forced himself to endure the horror.The witch’s tongue delved impossibly deep, caressing his teeth, tracing unknown sigils on the roof of his mouth, coddling his own tongue. Ambrose had eaten raw fish tasting better than the curling flesh, but there was no escape from the loathsome kiss. He was transfixed by her undead eyes as her tongue explored his mouth, fouling it with her rotten taste.At last the organ withdrew and Ambrose began to relax- until her teeth gouged a bloody furrow into his lower lip. He dropped the head, but Shala did not fall. His lip, clamped tightly in her teeth, distended from the weight of Shala’s head hanging off of it. With pain lancing through his jaw Ambrose swatted at the witch, but every blow that landed only tore his flesh.Joars finally intervened with a cry of protest. Seizing the witch’s head, he supported its weight, alleviating the pull on Ambrose’s lip. He twisted Shala’s ear until she finally released her grip sputtering one last breathless word, her maw stained crimson with blood.Ambrose held his mouth, close to losing his stomach for the second time this cursed morning. As Joras asked after his state, Ambrose’s heartbeat throbbed through the deep gash in his lip and he itched to cave in that undead skull with his cane. A tingling, burning sensation started in his lips, then spread.“What manner of curse have you-” Ambrose spat, bloody spittle flying from his lips. But then he noticed it, the pain was receding! The mutilated lip was knitting itself closed! Like hundreds of stinging fire ants, the sensation traveled down his body, leaving nothing but the absence of pain behind. Even the ever-present throbbing in his ankle abated!“No curse.” Shala grinned up at him from Joras’ grip, her cheeks flushed with an infusion of life. “I have told you again and again, until we find my boy, I will do my best to help.”Ambrose mulled the words over in his mouth, but as a man of honor, he had no choice, even if it galled him. Taking a deep breath, he bowed.“Thank you, Shala.”The witch’s grin was loathsome. “That wasn’t so hard now, was it?”Suddenly a long, drawn wail echoed through the jungle.“That’s Tsonia!” Ambrose exclaimed, reaching for a sword. “She’s in trouble!” As if to answer him, a second wail followed.“No,” Joras sighed, setting Shala back down. “That is not the sound of Tsonia in distress I’m afraid.”“The whore is in heat, like a mongrel bitch” Shala spat dismissively.“She is having all the fun, is she?” Ambrose asked, placing an arm around Joras’ shoulders.The artist scowled. “Sometimes it is very difficult, being her chronicler.” He gently laid his head upon the taller man’s shoulder. “It may be a while before we get that water.”Ambrose chuckled. “I’d rather half a keg of Debon’s Winter Mead right about now.”He shifted his weight to embrace Joras. Had it been only a few days since they’d been swept upon these dreadful shores? Ambrose had almost forgotten how it felt to stand without favoring his bad foot.Joras looked up at him, a sly cock to his eyebrow. “Oh, you do remember our first night then?” he asked. “I thought all that mead had muddled your memory.”“I remember enough,” Ambrose affirmed, and then he kissed Joras in a way he’d not soon forget. Maybe, he thought, they’d make it out of this hellish jungle alive after all, if Tsonia’s recklessness didn’t kill them all.With Ambrose’s body mended and T'pek leading them, they traveled at a much faster clip. The soggy, swampy soil gave way to firmer ground, with the occasional rock formation jutting up between the trees. By midday, the jungle seemed much less dense and oppressive, with pools of golden sunlight cutting through wider gaps in the leafy canopy.Shortly before dusk, with thick clouds pooling overhead, they reached a wide, gaping chasm. Deep below was the glitter of a rock-strewn river, its rush and roar echoing off the sheer cliffs to either side.Ambrose peered over the edge, shuddering. “What are those dark shapes clinging to the walls?” He pointed.“Death on wings,” T'pek said. “They hunt fish below.”“I hear a 'but’ somewhere,” Joras quipped, then turned to T'pek. “How do we cross? Climb?”T'pek shoo
The red-haired bitch of vexing humiliation?A 5-part story By Blind_Justice & Loqui Sordida Ad Me. Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Novels.The quarry she had stalked for weeks over choppy seas aboard Ambrose’s crowded ship, had through uncanny skill or dumb luck once again eluded her. Even if Kelgore had been seized for food or sport by the beastly natives, Tsonia still needed proof of his death to claim the God-King’s bounty. She would be damned if she was going to be robbed of her prize.Besides, Kelgore owed her an explanation as to how she came to be kneeling before him, spattered with his essence and no recollection at all. If he still lived, she would wrest an answer from him, and woe unto him if the answer displeased her.Anger coiling in her innards like a steel-clad serpent, Tsonia dressed. She refilled the water gourd and a pair of skins her fallen foes had carried. She took their spears and a few other odds and ends that she thought might prove useful and bundled them together in one of their nets. After a moment’s hesitation, she added the witch head to the bundle she had made. Kelgore clearly ascribed it some perverse value to have carried it with him through the storm. It might prove a useful bargaining chip.With a final look around for any hidden threats, Tsonia turned her back on the spring and followed the trickling rivulet back towards the beach. Joras and Ambrose would be waiting, thirsting in misery for the water she had promised them.The sky had darkened to a velvety black. Unknown constellations sparkled amidst the remnants of stormy clouds. Ambrose found it hard to measure the flow of time. How long had it been since Tsonia left to fetch some water? One hour? Several? Maybe some days? Between ever-mounting thirst and the pain ravaging his body, staying awake proved to be difficult. The monotonous rumble of the drums didn’t help.He only realized that sleep had claimed him when the femur, the feeble weapon Tsonia had left him with, dropped from numb fingers and hit his aching foot, jolting him awake again. Groaning, Ambrose fumbled for the bone before checking the limp body of his companion. Joras had succumbed to exhaustion, slumped into a heap on the splintered bench he and Ambrose were sitting on. At least the artist’s breathing seemed even and his brow wasn’t ablaze with fever.Ambrose fought desperately to keep his eyes open, listening with focused intent for other survivors skulking among the debris. But there was nothing save for the unending rhythm of the drums. Slowly, inexorably, his head sank to his chest, the weapon drooped lower and lower and before he knew it, slumber had once again claimed him.A gentle hand on his shoulder shocked Ambrose awake. Acting on pure instinct, he raised the femur, only to be stopped by a second hand around his wrist.“Is this the way to greet me when I bring food and water?” The voice was feminine and laced with dry wit. Slowly, his eyes adjusted to the murky gloom under the broken hull and he saw Tsonia’s face, a pale mask with twinkling eyes. Ambrose heaved a great sigh of relief, his voice hoarse with thirst.Tsonia pulled something from the ground and pressed it into Ambrose’s hand. The water skin was filled to the stopper and Ambrose greedily opened it, yearning for the feel of cool moisture on his parched lips and throat.“Drink slowly,” Tsonia advised him, sliding onto the bench next to Joras. “If you’re hungry, there are some strips of dried meat in there.” She nudged a rustling something with her foot.“What took you so long?” Ambrose rasped. "Feels like you were gone forever.“ He took a long, deliberately slow swig from the waterskin and sighed as the cool water poured down his throat.Tsonia cradled Joras’s head into the crook of her elbow and carefully whetted his lips with a thin rivulet of water. Groaning, the artist came to, sipping the life-giving liquid."I found a spring and Kelgore both,” she said, setting down the water skin and helping Joras sit upright. Once she was certain he could steady himself, Tsonia handed the skin off to him and busied herself with her bundle.“My apologies to your tailor, Joras,” Tsonia quipped as she ripped strips off the bottom of his salt-stained traveling cloak and knotted them around a spar of wood. A moment later, there was the sound of flint on steel and painfully bright sparks as Tsonia fought to light a makeshift torch. With an angry hiss, the wick of tattered rags sputtered to life“Did you slay him?” Joras muttered, his voice slowly regaining strength. His gaze wandered along her toned body. “There are new wounds.”“Nothing to worry about,” Tsonia said, waving his concern away with a dismissive slash of her hand. “Before I could seize Kelgore, some natives appeared and attacked us. Either he used the commotion to abscond or the natives have snatched him.”“You’re not planning on following him, are you?” Joras asked, his tone suggesting he already knew that Tsonia was planning exactly that.“Unless we want this whole endeavor to be for naught, we will have to follow him,” Tsonia said. “I know we’re short on men and weapons, but each hour we wait allows Kelgore to slip ever further from our grasp.”“And what if we find him? How do you plan to get us back to Xhastria?” Joras asked. “Be reasonable, Tsonia. Kelgore might be gone or dead already. We should focus our efforts on finding a way home.”Ambrose bent low over Tsonia’s bundle, rooting for the food she had offered. Sharp teeth clamped around his hand, nearly taking off two of his fingers and tearing open his skin. Blood flowed freely. Cursing, he yanked his hand back, staring in horror at a grinning head amidst the gathered trappings. Sharp teeth were still snapping, framed by bloodied lips. But worst of all were the eyes, bloodshot orbs glaring straight into his soul. Ambrose recoiled and grabbed his club.“What in the Burning Hells did you bring back, Tsonia?” Ambrose snapped, raising the weapon for a devastating blow. “Is that a woman’s severed head?”“Your flame-haired whore has no understanding of the things she is meddling with,” the witch head sputtered. “She loosed the storm that I contained. She has marooned you here in this waste.”“Did you both hear that?” Tsonia asked, her gaze going from Ambrose to Joras. Ambrose nodded in uneasy confirmation. “I was drugged by a native’s dart and thought the speaking head was but a waking nightmare.”“Who is, or was, she?" Joras asked. "And why bring it here?”“I am Shala, mother to the great Kelgore! Traveler beyond the Veil! Willing consort to demons! I have received the seed and the blessing of horrors beyond your compre,”Tsonia snatched up the head and crammed a scrap of driftwood in its mouth, interrupting its blasphemous tirade. “And she calls me ‘whore’?” the flame-haired warrior growled.“I thought I killed the witch aboard Kelgore’s ship,” Tsonia explained over Shala’s muffled grunts. “When I met Kelgore at the spring, he had her head with him. It must be very important for him to protect it through the storm and whatever else he encountered along these savage shores.”“You could have warned me,” Ambrose said, cradling his mauled hand against his chest. “It nearly cost me two fingers.”“I didn’t realize it was still dangerous,” Tsonia said. “I’m sorry.”She offered Ambrose a scrap of fabric as a makeshift bandage. The captain took it and wound it around his hand, trembling with his hastened heartbeat and pumping fresh crimson into the fabric.“And what do we do now?” Joras asked, suspiciously eyeing the disassembled bundle at their feet. “I don’t fancy a trek through hostile jungles with just a few water skins and barely any food. No paper, no paints or brushes. Not that you’d let me paint you once your hair starts to fade. I suppose all of your henna is at the bottom of the ocean. Not even a simple whittling blade to carve,”“And we have no idea where Kelgore might be,” Ambrose added, interrupting Joras’s rambling.There was a ghastly sound, halfway between retching and coughing. Shala’s head had managed to work the gag from its mouth. Her hoarse, cajoling voice offered: “I know where Kelgore is. He is as much a part of me as eyes or tongue. My spawn lives yet, and so long as he draws breath, I shall sense his presence.”“Why should we trust the word of a dead demon-kisser?" Ambrose asked, voice filled with malice. "We should roast you over a fire and send you to whatever hell will have you.”“Because that buxom barbarian brute of yours won’t let you leave this island until you find Kelgore,” Shala gloated. “I wish to be reunited with my son. We share a common goal, For now.”“It galls me that she has a point,” Ambrose confessed.“It’s just bargaining for its life. There is no truth to its words,” Tsonia spat.“Can you get them home, whore?” Shala challenged. “Do you have any notion in which direction Xhastria even lies?”Even Ambrose, with years of experience at navigation, had been flummoxed by the storm. They had been chasing Kelgore westward when last he had his bearings, so Xhastria probably lay somewhere to the east. It would be a toss of the dice to venture out on the open sea with so little certainty though.“No?” the witch continued. “Help me restore my body and with a simple spell I can conjure you home. To your very doorstep if you wish.” A peal of mad laughter burst from her bloodstained lips as the torch light danced across her twisted visage. “You don’t want to perish here on this pox-ridden island, now do you? Neither do I!”“We can restore your body?” Ambrose asked, his brow furrowing at the capacity of magic.“Yes! And it’s easier than you,” Shala’s strained voice was choked off again as Tsonia wedged the driftwood gag back in her disembodied jaw and then bound it there with a length of leather strap.“Don’t encourage its mad blathering,” she scolded. “First we find Kelgore, then we will find a way off this island, If it even is an island. If we must bargain with a demon-kisser, we do so as a last resort when all other options are exhausted. Agreed?”“Yes, of course,” Joras acceded. “We should just bury the horrible thing. We can come dig it up if we need it.”“No, better to keep her close,” Ambrose countered. “If we do need help, we may need it very quickly.” Despite his misgivings, Ambrose was keenly aware that the odds were against them and their options might be exhausted much sooner than anticipated.The gall of the red-haired bitch was a vexing humiliation, but one that Shala was prepared to suffer. Once she was reunited with Kelgore, her son would show Red Tsonia the true meaning of humiliation. Shala was patient. She could wait. And in the meantime she would watch and plot.She had spent the night with the taste of salt-wood on her tongue watching the fop in the orange cloak splint the ankle of the buffoon and then fashion him a crude crutch while the bitch stood watch. The fop was too much in thrall to the bitch to be of any use. The buffoon, however, had potential. Shala could see in him a resistance to the bitch’s authority and a desire for control. It was only his injured leg that kept him subservient to her.The buffoon could be useful.When the sun rose, her captors ate the scant food taken from the beast skin, and emptied their water skins. The bitch removed Shala’s gag, carefully avoiding her teeth. She needn’t have bothered though. While Shala did need blood to reform her body, it had to be pure blood, not the corrupted filth coursing through Red Tsonia’s veins. If she could taste pure blood for seven days in a row, well then things would be different.The bitch hoisted Shala by the hair and held her up to gaze at the jungle that grew up and away from the beach.“You say you can sense your whelp,” she said plainly. “So tell me, should we head towards the volcano or towards the flatlands?”“Oh now you want my mad blathering?” Shala scowled. “I thought I was not to be trusted.”“Consider this a test of your good will,” the bitch dared to challenge her. “If you don’t want to help us find Kelgore, I’ll just gag you again and,”“Towards the volcano,” Shala interjected. She was kept alive by the grace of her demonic masters and didn’t suffer from many ailments of the flesh, but the driftwood was still uncomfortable between her teeth.“You don’t actually trust her, do you?” asked the fop.“It doesn’t matter,” the bitch replied. “We were going that way regardless. The spring lies towards the volcano. We can refill our water and pick up Kelgore’s trail there.” With that, the wooden bit was roughly crammed in her mouth once more and secured there.Tsonia was clearly cunning, but ultimately the bitch would be no match for Shala’s guile. Shala was patient. She could wait.When the first rays of the rising sun turned the ocean into molten gold, Tsonia, Ambrose and Joras emerged from their flimsy shelter. The incessant drumming had gone all night making it difficult to snatch a few hours of fitful sleep. The drumming continued unabated as they ate a paltry breakfast, the remaining scraps from the captured rations had them feeling better equipped for the task at hand.The pain of Ambrose’s wounds ameliorated somewhat with rest and with the help of Joras’s crude cane, he managed to keep pace with the others along the stony swath between the tree line and the surf. At a thin brook that cut a narrow path to the sea, the flame-haired warrior turned, eagerly heading into the jungle which awakened to riotous life around them.Birds and monkeys screeched in the branches overhead and larger bodies rustled in the shoulder-high underbrush. Occasionally, there was a low growl close by which put Ambrose’s hairs on end but Tsonia didn’t seem perturbed by the ominous sounds around them. And of course there were the drums, still rumbling sonorous, foreboding, in the distance. He was certain their cadence had changed.Tsonia's palm against his chest stopped his musing and stride both.“What is it?” Ambrose whispered. Tsonia tapped her nose and took a deep breath.Ambrose sniffed. It took him a few tries, but then he noticed the tell-tale aroma of roasted meat.“Someone ahead?” he hissed.Tsonia nodded, dropping into a crouch. She readied one of her scavenged spears.“Maybe survivors,” Ambrose offered. “We should greet them accordingly.”“You do that,” Tsonia said. “I’ll make sure we don’t stumble into an ambush. The natives carried flint and steel.” She unslung the crude pack from her shoulder and, quiet like a shadow, she slithered into the foliage. Ambrose tossed the pack over his shoulder. The head within grunted in annoyance. Grasping his driftwood cane with his free hand and, with Joras just behind, he pushed forward.He entered a large glade shadowed by overhanging branches. The early morning light glinted off the surface of a serene pool. A crude campfire had been erected next to a sturdy sea chest, the jungle wood causing more smoke than actual fire. Nevertheless, some skewers had been prepared, chunks of meat roasting over the flames. Two figures scrambled to their feet as Ambrose and Joras broke their cover. Long, curved blades glinted in the sunlight. One of the men, long-haired and sporting a thick, pointy beard, suddenly cried out in joy.“Captain!”Ambrose recognized the caller as Montu, one of his veterans. The other, a long-limbed, bald Xhastrian with ritualistic scars running down his arms, shot his companion a worried look and fell into a combat stance, his blade ready to strike.A shadow emerged behind the Xhastrian. Sunlight broke on flaming hair as Tsonia snaked an arm around his neck, a muscular leg slid between his and with an almost playful tug, the fierce warrior plucked the gleaming sword from his grasp, gently dragging the unbalanced man to the grassy ground. He was too surprised to offer much of a struggle, especially when Tsonia caressed his naked chest with the blade she had just wrested from his fingers.“Who’s your friend, Montu?” Ambrose asked.“Captain, that’s Sethos,” Montu said, sword down and hand open in a placating gesture. “Please, don’t hurt him. He was one of Kelgore’s, but without him, the bottomless sea would have claimed me twice over.”“Why didn’t we see you before?” Joras asked suspiciously over the din of the distant drums. The artist walked around the campfire, stopping at the large trunk. He raised the lid and peered inside. Within he saw weapons, tools, ropes, nails and other useful things. “That’s a Quartermaster’s Chest, isn’t it?”“That chest carried us both through the storm and then nearly broke our bones when we got tossed onto the shore a ways over there,” Montu gestured towards the distant beach, then grimaced, massaging his ribs. “We cracked it open to see if there was anything edible inside. When we heard the drums, we thought we might be able to trade with the natives, so we dragged it with us along the beach looking for water and found this spring. Someone had already been here though, killing two…” His gaze darted towards the edge of the glade. Something, hidden by the thick undergrowth, chewed on bones.“Two what?" Joras asked."Two green-furred, creatures,” Sethos added. “Heads like beasts, claws like daggers, long tails. Someone stabbed them good.” He offered a grim smile. "Your handiwork, eh?“ His eyes sought Tsonia."They left me no choice,” Tsonia grumbled. “I suspect they are the natives whose drum we hear. They wore crude clothing and carried tools so they have some savage culture.”“They seem quite proud of their music, at least,” Joras mused, casting an annoyed look towards the unceasing drum beat. Ambrose frowned at the quip. The drums were becoming tiresome, and he wouldn’t mind a chance to stab the drummers himself.“Sethos and I were just discussing what to do next, Captain,” Montu said, breaking Ambrose’s reverie. “We have water, game, some tools and plenty of wood. We could start building a ship to get home. But maybe we should look for other survivors first.”“I’ve seen no signs of other survivors on the beach,” Ambrose said. “I doubt there are many of us or Kelgore’s men left.” He gazed at the towering trees surrounding the glade. “With only the five of us and the tools in the chest, building anything seaworthy would take months. And I’m not much of a shipwright.”“But what other choice do we have?” Sethos asked. “Who knows if other ships even pass by this forlorn shore?”“Kelgore survived,” Tsonia snarled, fingertips touching her own cheek and lips as if she was wiping away some horrid stain. “I saw him myself here at this spring last night. I’m here to pick up his trail and I won’t return to Xhastria without his head as a prize. If the natives have taken him, we’ll need to deal with them as well.”There was a muffled chuckling only Ambrose heard. He jostled the pack to shut up the insolent head of the undying witch. Shala seemed to disagree with Tsonia’s assessment and uttered another guttural noise.“Provided they are willing to listen. Or hand over Kelgore,” Ambrose said. “Don’t forget, they tried to kill you.”“I’m not forcing anyone to come along,” Tsonia said, not unkindly. “But there is safety in numbers. Your chance of survival would be better by my side.”Ambrose had seen Tsonia fight, both during the recent boarding action gone awry and when they first met all these years ago in a nameless pirate haven tucked away on a rocky island off the Xhastrian coast.He had been there on business, selling overpriced food and diluted beer to the locals and taking on new crew. She had strode into the dockside tavern, wearing only her tattered chain mail and a devilish grin drawing the eye of every man. What caught Ambrose’s eye though was the rakish young man in her wake, frantically scribbling on a pad propped on his forearm, trying to capture her stride, her pose and probably her curvy backside.When stools went flying and heads started rolling, Ambrose met Joras under a table, unwilling to waste his drink in the maelstrom of bodies. The seed for a long-lasting friendship, and so much more!, was planted as they both watched Tsonia fell men by the dozen in pursuit of one crooked merchant who owed her money.Ambrose’s gaze sought Joras’s. If the artist stayed, they would be on even terms with the sailors and the chance of betrayal would be much lower. Maybe they could even rekindle some of the magic they had shared after Tsonia had bought rounds for the bar and left them to their own devices for a night. But Joras once again had eyes only for his muse. Ambrose sighed.Joras was too fixated on capturing every move Tsonia made. He would follow her blindly into the blackest pits of Hell. Someone had to make sure he wouldn’t find a miserable end in her company. And if she was willing to blindly dive into the jungle, brave a tribe of murderous savages all in the name of claiming a bounty on a demon-kisser, she would need all the help she could get.“Is this true, Captain?" Asked Montu tossing a glance at Sethos. "Are we still hunting Kelgore?”“Tyrant’s Blade is but a shattered wreck on the beach,” Ambrose replied. “I am your captain no more. You are free to do as you wish, but I invite you to accompany us as a fellow brother of the sea. Together, we can brave whatever this unknown land may throw at us.”Montu offered a wide grin. “Then you’ll be happy to know that Sethos and I have become brothers as well.” He raised his hand, showing a fresh cut in his palm. “I trust Sethos with my life, cap-, Ambrose.”The Xhastrian did the same. “No man or beast can tear us apart now,” Sethos said. “Where my brother Montu goes, I go.”“Even if it puts you at odds with your former master, Kelgore?" Joras asked.Sethos spat on the ground and turned, showing ghastly burn marks on his back. "This is how he treats his soldiers when in a foul mood,” the sailor growled. “I served him loyally from the beginning, but when his eye fell on a whore I was with, this is what I got for not wanting to share. He tore a poker from a fireplace and used it on my back. Kelgore can rot in the Pits for all I care!”“Why did you sail with him, even after what he did?” Joras asked, pity and dread in equal measure in his voice.“The only other choice was to be left behind in the fishing village we’d just despoiled,” Sethos answered with neither pride nor contrition in his voice.“Kelgore will answer for his crimes,” Tsonia vowed, rifling through the chest and picking up an axe. Grim determination flared in her steely gaze. “Let us take only as many weapons and gear as we can easily carry and be off. The sooner we find him, the sooner justice can be done!”The prints of Kelgore’s sturdy boots had vanished at the spring, replaced by signs of dragging, and the clawed footprints of the natives. Tsonia concluded that Kelgore had been drugged and carried off. Sethos wasn’t much of a woodsman but he recognized the broken leaves and the scuffed earth when the signs were pointed out to him.The small group, now armed with swords, daggers, axes and a spade, left the glade behind, following what appeared to be a hunting trail. Branches had been carved away, foliage had been cleared and the occasional snare had been set.“How kind of the natives to provide for us,” the red-haired woman called Tsonia chuckled, pulling a small, furry carcass from one such snare. “We won’t go hungry tonight.” She tucked the carcass into her makeshift pack and tightened the vines holding their meager possessions together.Tsonia led the party in single file, followed by the well-dressed northerner and the injured Ambrose in the middle. Sethos, bringing up the rear behind Montu, wasn’t quite sure what to make of his new companions. Montu’s former captain was preoccupied by something, probably his injury. The northerner called Joras seemed too milky to be a mercenary, and yet Montu and Ambrose both seemed to defer to him.They followed a meandering trail through the claustrophobic jungle. The dense foliage pressed in on them from all sides, and seemed to swallow their words. It was hard to hear Montu even just in front of him, let alone any of the others further up the line. Despite the hum of insects, the caterwauling cries of birds and monkeys, and the ceaseless drumming that seemed to surround them, Sethos found the jungle eerily quiet and still. He was a sailor, and used to the open expanse of the sea and the chatter of other sailors.“So that’s the infamous 'Red Tsonia’, is it?” Sethos asked, just to hear something other than the drums. “I heard she stalked the Beast of Bral for three months across the Wastes of Cairn and carried its hide back to Baron Septimus as a wedding dowry, then refused to marry him.”Montu laughed. “We played that game the first two days she was aboard. Someone would repeat some outlandish tale they’d heard of Tsonia’s exploits, she’d claim it was all true, and then her man Joras would set the record straight.”There was no response from further up the line so Sethos let the conversation end there. The confined bowels of the jungle unnerved him. He was certain Montu and Ambrose had to feel the same.Ahead, Tsonia called a stop. The trail they had followed intersected another and they could find no track or sign that made for an obvious choice.“Do we ask Shala?” Ambrose suggested, and Sethos’s ears perked up“What do you know of Shala?” he asked. “Does she still live, as well as Kelgore?”“Live’ is perhaps too generous a term,” Joras answered. “But by some sorcery, she’s not exactly dead yet, either.”Tsonia rolled her eyes. “Fine,” she sighed. “I suppose the old witch’s opinion is marginally better than a coin toss.” She set the pack on the ground and to Sethos’s horror, pulled out a severed head by its hair. He recognized her visage immediately as her malevolent gaze fell on each member of the party. Shala growled, her anger obvious despite the piece of driftwood between her teeth.“You have something useful to say, perhaps?” Tsonia removed the wood.“Insolent whore!" Shala spat. "How dare you cram-”Snarling, Tsonia rammed the wood back between the head’s teeth. “Oh, not enjoying the company?” she snapped. "Too bad. We only have this one pack and you’re sharing with our dinner.“ Shala replied with another growl and a hate-filled glare before Tsonia tied the vines again and tossed the pack over her shoulder."It’s dangerous to keep that thing,” Sethos warned. “If you can’t burn it to ash, you should smash it to a pulp.”“It may yet prove useful,” argued Ambrose. “We may need her magic to get home.”“They hurt you, didn’t they?” Joras asked softly. “Kelgore and his witch, I mean.”Sethos stood silent for a moment. The men who sailed the sea had a code, and he was loath to speak ill of any man he’d sailed with. And sailing with Kelgore had been hugely profitable for a time. But he had seen things that haunted him. Things he hoped no man would ever see again. Sethos glanced at Montu. His blood brother nodded.“Kelgore can seize the minds of others,” Sethos murmured at last. “It’s those black eyes of his. When you look into those eyes, he steals your will and your memories both. He turns you to his cause whether you wish to do his bidding or not. I have seen Kelgore compel strong men to slice the throats of their own children, or to throw themselves into the sea and just let themselves drown rather than try to swim.”“And after, you have no memory of what you have done,” Tsonia added quietly.“Yes!” agreed Sethos, looking up with a start. “You’ve seen it! You’ve seen this power he wields.”“I’ve seen it,” she agreed, wiping her hand across her mouth. “Which is why he must die, But first we must find him. Very well, if we can see no reason to choose one path over another, then I suggest,”Sethos couldn’t say where the violent eruption of fur and foliage came from. Before he was even aware of it, the whole party was knocked asunder in a chaotic frenzy of violence. As a massive beast tore through their midst, he saw flashes of teeth as long as his cutlass, claws like knives, fur striped brown and white like the sun-dappled jungle floor. And then just as quickly it was gone.“Ambrose! It got Ambrose!” Montu shouted as he clambered to his feet. In a flash of fiery hair, Tsonia was already plunging headlong into the thicket.Sethos sprang up, drew his sword, and followed his blood brother in pursuit with the man Joras close behind carrying the pack. If Sethos had found the winding trail claustrophobic, this wild boscage was worse. Leaves and branches assailed him as he tore heedlessly through the dense undergrowth. Somewhere ahead, Ambrose screamed for help.Montu hacked away a branch and Sethos did likewise, just in time to see the mail-clad mercenary let fly her axe on the run. The spinning blade vanished into the brush, but a monstrous squeal of pain told them it had found its mark.“It bleeds now!” Tsonia called, without breaking her stride, and only a few yards later, Sethos saw the splatter of crimson against the leaves and the crooked path it wove through the jungle.The beast fled like a coursed hare, skirting this way and that, but Tsonia doggedly held its trail and the three men followed in her verdant wake. Suddenly the ground dropped away and Sethos found himself skidding and sliding down the embankment of a deep ravine in a cloud of dry forest litter. As he scrambled to arrest his perilous descent, he finally caught sight of their quarry ahead.Its long, sinuous body was like that of a great weasel or otter, but the fangs that grew from its jaw reminded Sethos more of the great bloated tusk-seals he had seen in the frozen north. It held Ambrose in its maw, secure behind those fearsome teeth. The man struggled still, but before Sethos could guess at Ambrose’s fate, the beast had scrambled away around a bend in the ravine.“It’s trapped itself!” shouted Tsonia. "Hurry! Before it finds purchase to climb out again!“Sethos found it easier to follow the rocky gorge at speed. In the dim depths, the brush was not so dense, and he frequently spotted their prey trying in vain to escape back to the jungle coverage above. But the chasm narrowed. Sethos caught glimpses of Ambrose tucking himself tightly around the great saber-toothed snout to avoid being battered against the steeply sloping walls.Cornered by the contracting ravine, the great beast made one last desperate attempt to climb to its freedom, claws scrabbling against the loose dirt and mulch, Tsonia’s axe still lodged in its flank. Failing, it floundered back to the bottom and turned on its pursuers, hissing.Ambrose pounded the brute’s snout with his fists, but the creature shook him violently until Ambrose was forced to relent. He seemed to almost slump in the beast’s jaws, as if his very strength drained away."Stand your ground here and don’t let it flee,” Tsonia warned. Montu and Sethos flanked the warrior, swords at the ready, penning the great creature in. “It will have to drop Ambrose if it wants to fight.”“Here,” offered Sethos, "Take my blade.“With his blade in hand, Tsonia charged the beast, dropping low at the last moment to avoid a swipe of its giant paw. It was evident to Sethos that she sought to attack the monster’s flank and avoid any strike that might injure Ambrose, but the beast was too nimble, its long body turning and shifting and always keeping its snarling gaze on its foe.A distraction was called for."Montu, my brother, stand ready if it should flee,” Sethos instructed as he knelt down to pick up a pair of good-sized stones from those scattered at his feet. “Joras, help me draw its attention, To the left, ready?”“Yes, I see,” Joras confirmed, laying aside his pack and spade and picking up a pair of stones as well.The pair let fly with their stones, pelting the great beast’s shoulder and ample side. It turned, growling at them, and with no hesitation, Tsonia seized her opening. The curved blade drew a gash along the creature’s right side. It was no killing blow, but Tsonia clearly had a more immediate goal. As Sethos and Joras rearmed themselves, Tsonia snatched the embedded axe from the creature’s hide, ripping it out with a gout of flesh and blood.The mighty beast screamed in agony, dropping Ambrose, and wheeled on its tormentor with ivory blades. As Sethos and Joras let fly a second volley, Tsonia hacked at its tusk with the axe and drew a slash across the giant weasel’s flaring snout.The creature recoiled in pain, and decided it had had enough.Charging like a coiled spring the creature burst past Montu, who set his blade and raked the beast’s long flank as it passed. Sethos and Joras could only press themselves flat against the walls of the canyon to avoid being smashed by the careening hulk as it fled.“I am beginning to hate this place,” Ambrose quipped as Joras helped him to his feet. He was shaken, battered and scratched, but not seriously harmed. Sethos supposed the giant saber-toothed weasel had meant to carry Ambrose back to feed to its young.“The trails are far behind us now,” Tsonia observed, “and I don’t like our chances of finding our way back. I suggest that if we cannot track Kelgore, we make for high ground and get the lay of the land. Perhaps we can spot something useful.”This course of action sounded reasonable. Sethos and Montu nodded their agreement.“That sounds like quite a climb,” Joras objected. “Perhaps we should call it a day and let Ambrose rest. We only have a few hours of daylight left to find shelter.”Reluctantly their fire-haired leader agreed. “Let’s at least find a way out of this ravine then. I don’t want to get caught in a flood if there’s rain.”Ambrose had managed to spark a fire while the others scavenged in the gloaming twilight. The worst of his wounds had been swaddled in bright orange bandages torn from Joras’s cloak. The crude lean-to that Montu and Sethos had built had kept most of the brief rain off of him, but he was still damp and sweaty and miserable. His tunic dried by the fire as he fed damp punk wood into the flames.In the distance, the drums continued, and not for the first time, Ambrose wished they would stop. He considered unbinding the old witch’s head, just to have a voice to listen to other than the incessant beat of the drums. He was sure that sound would haunt his nightmares for the rest of his days.Before Ambrose’s misery could drive him to foolishness, Montu emerged, hacking through the foliage with his sword.“Well done keeping this fire alight through the rain,” Montu called. “The smell of smoke led us right back to you.”“We’ll not go hungry tonight, at least,” called Sethos from behind Montu. He held up a pair of large birds by their feet.“I’m glad you’re back before dark,” Ambrose replied without standing. “Come and dry those wet clothes by the fire. I’m worried about what rot and disease might find us without good, healthy sea air.”“The humidity is bothersome, isn’t it?” agreed Montu, removing his tunic and spreading it out to dry in the fire’s smokey heat. Sethos crawled into the lean-to in search of a knife to butcher their meat. “The drums are bothersome, too,” he added.“Did you spot a drummer, like you hoped?”“No,” Montu shook his head. “No sign of man nor beast-man. The drums fell silent as we approached. They’re watching us, I think.”“Of course they’re watching us,” Ambrose snapped. "But why? That’s the question.“"Perhaps they fear this,” Sethos said, emerging from the lean-to with the witch’s severed head in his hands.“Put that back!" Ambrose growled. Shala’s eyes locked on his and he felt for a moment as if his very soul shriveled under her gaze. He turned away. "I don’t want to look at her.”“Then we should cast it into your fire and be rid of it,” Sethos argued.“She claims her magic can bring us home,” Ambrose objected.“And you believe her?” Montu asked, snatching the grotesque thing from Sethos, holding it at eye level and staring defiantly into Shala’s scowl.“I don’t know,” Ambrose answered, his eyes fixed on the throbbing heart of the campfire. “I don’t want to, but I fear there may be no alternative, I don’t want to die here, But I’m sure there would be a terrible price for her help.”“Let’s ask her then!” Montu proposed with a laugh. “Tell us old woman, what would it cost us for your magic to take us all home?” He began to unfasten the gag that held Shala in silence.“No, stop!” Sethos objected and reached to grab the witch’s head back from his blood-brother.Ambrose flinched at the sudden flurry of recklessness. Montu, balancing the head in one hand, tried to jerk it away with a good-natured laugh. For a moment they fumbled Shala’s severed head between them, and Ambrose pushed himself back away from their roughhousing, his injured hand throbbing with the memory of his own carelessness. It looked for a moment as if Montu would yield to his wiser brother, but then Sethos suddenly yanked his hand back, leaving Montu with the prize.“Shit! The bitch bit my finger!” he cried, shaking the pain from his injured hand. “She drew blood.”“Traitor! Deserter! Mutineer!” spat Shala, as Montu dropped her to the ground to save his own hands. "Addle-brained Turncoat! Pox-ridden bastard son of a drooling whore!“Sethos found the gag and pressed the wooden bit back between her teeth."Does it ever say anything useful, or just hurl insults?” Montu asked as he helped tightened the gag back in place.Ambrose thought about it. The witch had been more forthcoming after Tsonia had first recovered her. He wondered if perhaps her mind was beginning to rot. Of course, if he’d been bound up the way she had, he wouldn’t be in a very helpful mood either. He was still considering how to answer Montu’s question when his former shipmate looked up with a start.“Hullo!” called a familiar voice from out of the brush. “Ambrose?”“It’s Tsonia and Joras,” Montu hissed. “Put it back,” he urged Sethos, forcing the gagged witch into his blood-brother’s hands “Quick! Quick, put it back!”“Here,” called Ambrose as Sethos scurried inside. "This way.“"I wish you wouldn’t make such a racket,” Ambrose heard Tsonia admonish Joras as she hacked their way into the campsite.“I’m pretty sure everyone already knows right where we are,” Joras countered, gesturing to the ever-present drumming that surrounded them day and night. “Did you have any luck?”“Two fine birds for dinner,” replied Montu, standing up and drawing the eyes of the newcomers. Ambrose recognized the ploy and scooted over to block their view of Sethos and the lean-to. "How about you?“"Not so much I’m afraid,” Joras replied. "A pair of breadfruits and an armload of dry hanging deadwood for the fire.“"That’s alright then,” said Sethos, crawling back out of the lean-to with what Ambrose considered forced nonchalance. “We’ll eat well, dry our clothes and be on our way in the morning.”The next morning, the party left their camp site, bleary-eyed, short-tempered and hardly rested. At least they had a bellyful of food, to grant them energy for another sweat-drenched hike through tangled vines under the wide-brimmed, leafy canopy.Sethos slid down a tree. “The volcano is that way,” he said, pointing. “There is no sign of a trail through all this damned tree cover.”“It was much easier walking than having to hack our way through the undergrowth,” Ambrose complained, massaging his ankle.“Can you still walk?” Montu snapped. “Or should we carry you?”“I think I have a few more miles in me,” Ambrose said, pulling himself up to his full height again. “Let us find some fresh water and a more defensible position before we settle down for the night.”“I’ve seen a clearing not far from here,” Sethos said. “With any luck we might find a spring or a stream there.”Tsonia again took the lead and they set out, soon swallowed by the deep viridian shadows of the jungle. The men were growing testy. The maddening noise of wildlife and the rolling of the natives’ drums was even beginning to wear on her nerves. The air was hot and humid, almost as tiring as the act of marching through the gloom. The stench of rotting vegetation was all-encompassing.The ground, Tsonia noticed, thus far stable enough save for hidden vines and air roots poised to trip them up, became more and more soggy. Rivulets of water glinted, highlighted by the few errant shafts of late afternoon sun which managed to pierce the emerald canopy overhead.And then the endless gloom brightened as the jungle thinned ahead of them. The clearing was nigh!Tsonia stopped abruptly, causing Joras to nearly bump into her. The artist swayed to the side, a shocked yell tearing from his lips. Ahead, wound around a thick, spiked pole, someone had left a skeleton, its skull painted a ghastly red and the arms spread along a crossbeam.“What is this?” Joras gasped.“Seems to be some kind of totem,” Ambrose guessed, mopping thick beads of sweat off his forehead. “Maybe the natives use it to mark their territory?”“I wish they’d use signposts, like civilized people,” Joras muttered. "Gave me a righteous scare.“Tsonia crouched, her blade at hand, her eyes scouring the ground sucking at her feet. "No tracks. No sign of a worn path.”“Why put up this ghastly marker then?” Joras wondered.Ambrose examined the body. “What do the natives look like?” he wondered.“Large, monstrous. Heads which look more like animals than human,” Tsonia said. “Why do you ask?”“Don’t you see? There’s nothing monstrous about the skull. They must have found a human and put him here.”Tsonia traced her fingers over the skull, noticing the cracks and pits in the bone. “That’s too old and weather-beaten to be a fresh kill.”“So we’re not the first humans to maroon on these shores,” Joras said. “Maybe there is a settlement somewhere? And ships to take us back home?” His eyes gleamed with renewed hope, echoed by Montu and Sethos. The sailors slapped their shoulders in silent jubilation.“We need directions,” Tsonia admitted. “First we learn more about the lay of the land. Then we find the natives and Kelgore.”The warrior pushed past the grisly totem, resuming their trek. She had taken only a dozen steps when a guttural noise came from the pack.“Quiet you,” Tsonia snapped. The unliving witch inside answered with another growl. Whatever she wanted was turned into gibberish by the wood secured between her teeth.“Maybe we should find out what’s irking her,” Ambrose suggested.“I’ll not suffer more of her insults,” Tsonia growled. “I’ve had more than enough of that already.” She slapped the pack. “You only speak when spoken to, you hear?”A spiteful grunt was her answer. Satisfied with it, Tsonia headed towards the vestiges of daylight breaking through the gaps between the towering trees. Ambrose and Joras were right behind her.“Ishtar’s tits,” Tsonia cursed, stopping just shy of the last trees. “That’s not the kind of water we need.”Ambrose joined her, blinking at the radiance assaulting his eyes. The clearing was vast, and covered almost entirely in swampy, brackish water. Misshapen trees grew from tiny islands like mutilated appendages of a submerged giant. Like diaphanous clouds with vile intent, large swarms of bloodthirsty insects lazily drifted over the stagnant pool, their droning buzz heralding naught but agony should they find soft, exposed flesh. The first breeze they’d felt in hours greeted them, but it carried a hellish stench, like rank, rotting eggs.“Sulphur,” Joras said, indicating the distant volcano visible above the tree line at last. “The volcano’s influence must reach all the way here.”The pack groaned. There was the hair-raising sound of teeth scoring salt-encrusted wood.Tsonia grabbed the pack and held it at eye level, her gaze lancing into one of Shala’s eyes, barely visible behind a clump of rodent fur. “I’ve had it with your noises, woman,” she hissed. “One more gasp, growl or moan and I’ll toss you into the depths of the swamp. Do you understand?”A noise, almost a word, made it past the gag. Tsonia tossed the pack over her shoulder again. “Good.”She cast a long, troubled gaze around the swamp and tried to judge the distance to the volcano’s rising foothills on the far side. The plume of smoke rising into the evening sky seemed almost sinister in the fading light of dusk.“Crossing this pit will be slow and messy. Who knows what kind of beasts are lurking under the surface.” She scowled at a swarm of insects drifting close. “And I don’t fancy being bitten by those bloodsuckers. Even if it takes us longer, we should walk along the edge.”The sun had long ago fallen below the horizon and still they trudged along the edge of the swamp, looking for a spot of dry land to set up camp. They came across another totem, this one built from human bones as well and still, their purpose eluded them. Exhausted, tired and riddled with insect bites, they struggled on.Montu cast uneasy glances to the side, noting the strange lights flickering under the surface of the swamp and the thick fog obscuring their already limited vision.He had been born and raised in the Green Cities, surrounded by endless deserts. The jungle, the swamp, all teeming with murderous life, was utterly alien to him. He didn’t know if swamps were supposed to glow like that. He glanced towards his blood brother Sethos, but the Xhastrian seemed as uneasy as he was, grasping the heft of his axe with white-knuckled intensity. The captain, no, Ambrose!, cursed and stumbled, the treacherous ground grasping his already weakened leg. Joras easily caught and steadied him.“If we don’t find a safe place soon, this swamp will be my grave,” Ambrose grumbled.A hollow groan answered him, loud enough to be heard over the ever-rumbling drums. And then another. And a third.Montu raised his sword and cast his gaze about. The sounds had come from the swamp, but try as he might, he didn’t spot anything awry.Tsonia, blade in hand, whirled on her heel. “This is not the time for idle jests!” she snapped.There was a strange, sucking noise, of something being dragged across the muddy ground. Montu caught movement at the edge of his vision. There, cast in sharp relief against the sickening glow of the swamp, he saw an arm rise and fall, hand curled into a claw. The arm ended in a body crawling along the ground. Sightless, milky eyes rolled in a devastated skull, the jaw frantically snapping.Another shape shambled close, this one’s rotted limbs swaying in an unsteady gait. And there were yet more, rising from the swamp, dozens of unliving nightmares coming to haunt the living.“Away from the water,” Tsonia ordered. "Before they cut off every escape!“"If it’s not too late already,” Sethos growled, swinging his axe. “They’re everywhere!” The heavy blade split a skull like rotted kindling. Still, a clawed hand grazed the Xhastrian’s shoulder as the body crumpled, tearing a gash into his dark skin. Montu swung his sword as well, beheading the crawler at his feet. Ambrose, Tsonia and even Joras swung sword and axe and spade, trying to stem the tide of shambling bodies slowly, inexorably encircling them.A hand closed around Montu’s ankle, sharp, filthy claws digging into his skin. He stumbled backwards, escaping the second hand slicing downwards by sheer dumb luck. The headless body at his feet still writhed, still sought to tear him apart. Gritting his teeth against the pain, Montu bent low and tore the clammy hand from his leg. Sethos’ axe came down, shattering the undead thing’s spine. At last, the body stopped moving.“Thank you, brother,” Montu said.Sethos gasped in protest. Hot blood fountained, spattering across Montu’s face and chest. Another corpse grasped Sethos from behind, claws like iron vises around the Xhastrian’s arms, teeth tearing at soft tissue. The Xhastrian moaned and staggered, trying to dislodge the monster frantically gnawing at his throat. The axe fell from his fingers.Montu used the heavy pommel of his sword, slamming it into the stinking head until the thing stopped tearing at Sethos’s neck. His blood brother was alive, just, his breath a sick, wet gurgling.“No, don’t die,” Montu whispered.Sethos raised his hand, a flick of a gesture to the rear.Before Montu could turn, a heavy weight fell on him from behind, toppling him onto the gasping Sethos. Razor-like claws tore into Montu’s back, sharp teeth sunk into his calves and shoulders. More and more bodies piled onto him, robbing him of the air to scream for help.Whimpering helplessly, his face caked in his brother’s blood, Montu died, torn asunder by the ravenous horde.T'pek shook his head. The fools had left the trails and ignored the totems. Every whelp of the tribe knew to give the red bones a wide berth. The elders had the grisly warnings placed for a reason after all. The swamp was forbidden, the final resting place of all convicted criminals, be they tribesmen or outsiders. Only, ever since they had tossed that witch into it years ago, the corpses would not stay dead. His keen eyes easily pierced the gloom and his nostrils caught the rancid stench of the swamp-borne dead as they poured from the waters.He had seen the dead walk twice, once as a dare when he still was a stupid, reckless whelp and now for a second time, while watching these curious outsiders blunder through the Hunting Grounds. While the other members of his hunting party couldn’t wait to boast of their catch in front of the females and elders, T'pek knew that patience would bring much greater gain.And unlike his younger kin, he knew a few words of the outsider tongue, gleaned from the flamboyantly clad traders who had come to the village once and never left or those lost souls that had been picked off the beach over the years.He would challenge this fire-headed female in her own tongue. She would accept, and then she would yield to him once beaten. His pack mates had been younger and quicker, but T'pek was a shrewd old hunter, invisible unless he wanted to be seen and gifted with years of experience.There was a distinct stirring from his loins. That fire-headed female was strong and fierce. Other hunters would scoff at her lack of caution the mighty jungle demanded, but T'pek had seen her grow and adapt already. Not even her lack of fur dampened his lust for her. She would give birth to powerful whelps and he would make sure she would do so often. To make his heated wish come true, T'pek needed to throw the ravenous dead off her trail first.From his perch in a holy kalupa tree, he spotted one of the thick-skinned swamp dwellers, docile plant-eaters renowned for their tender meat and fierce tempers once angered. Their fragrant blood made for good bait and he knew they would run away from any danger.T'pek pulled a sharp-edged sling stone from his pouch, a serrated, triangular flint perfect for piercing thick hide and cracking skulls. He nestled the projectile into his sling and, easily balancing on the thick branch he’d been sitting on, let fly. The jagged missile hit the swamp-dweller’s arse, carving a deep gash into its hide. Braying madly, the ponderous beast thundered forwards, blood mingling with water.T'pek bared his teeth in a feral grin. He could see the dead horde falter, the stragglers swerving to track the fresh bait. More and more stumbled back into the swamp, eager to latch on to the fresh source of blood like the wicked snapperfish infesting the White River which had torn apart his first mate.If she was as strong as he hoped, the fire-headed female would now be able to make a clean break from the dead.He settled back on his haunches and resumed his vigil. The hunt was far from over.To be continued in Part 3.By Blind_Justice & Loqui Sordida for Literotica.
What use is brute strength when the mind is under siege?A 5-part story By Blind_Justice & Loqui Sordida Ad Me. Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Novels.Preface: A grim, brutal sword-and-sandal adventure in the style of Robert E Howard, creator of characters like Conan the Barbarian, Soloman Kane, and Red Sonya (whom we pay homage to in this tale).The grim visage of a snarling war goddess carved into the prow cut a foaming trough through a particularly high wave as fifty slaves grunted with the effort of dragging their oars through the churning waters, spurred on by the pounding drum and the sting of the lash. Slicing through the choppy sea with the practiced grace of a harem dancer, the sleek bireme stalked her prey, her sail taut and a firm hand on her tiller. With the salt wind in his hair and the brine spray on his face, Ambrose smiled.Gods willing, the Tyrant’s Blade, would finally overtake Kelgore the Despoiler today, putting an end to the pirate king’s bloody rampage and filling Ambrose’s purse with coin. The dreaded pirate had pillaged his way along the Xhastrian coast, uncannily avoiding his pursuers through guile, bribery and masterful seamanship. The merchants and nobles of Xhastria called out for the God-King to put an end to Kelgore’s atrocities. Despite unleashing the considerable naval might of Xhastria upon him, Kelgore still evaded justice.And so the heavy bounty levied on Kelgore’s head was enough to pique the interest of every mercenary who could stomach a rolling deck beneath their feet.Ambrose counted himself lucky to have cut a deal and joined forces with a warrior-witch whose renown, if not already legendary, was certain to become so. He had once seen Red Tsonia’s prowess in battle for himself and it made his heart glad that she sailed under his banner, and not Kelgore’s.Tsonia, flame-haired, long-limbed and clad in a woolen cloak against the stinging wind and spray, shot him a fierce glare. “The storm draws closer, Captain,” she stated flatly. In any other, Ambrose would have expected at least a note of worry in the statement.“Aye, and Kelgore sails into its teeth!” he replied.Leaden clouds hung but a hand’s breadth above the slate-gray, foam-crested waves and the sky between was hidden behind a curtain of distant rain. Less than a scant league ahead of them the silhouette of Kelgore’s ship drew low in the water, over-burdened by its plundered cargo. A lance of lightning bisected the sky to the west but still Kelgore’s crew pulled hard for the rain shroud.“He means to lose us in the maelstrom,” Ambrose continued, barely audible over the groan of the oars, the howl of the wind and the roar of the waves around them. “But Tyrant’s Blade is lighter. Faster. We’ll be on him before he’s swallowed by the storm.”“We’ll both be in the gullet of that storm if the winds change,” Tsonia observed, bracing a hand against the rail as a heavy swell rolled the deck beneath her feet. “But I’d rather die than let the last fortnight’s hunt go to waste. Kelgore the Despoiler dies today, come hell or high water.”Ambrose, steady as always, leaned against the rudder to climb the steep swell and keep Kelgore in sight. “You might have both if that storm catches us,” he replied. Then to his crew he shouted “Make ready to cut away the sail lines! We’ll not waste time furling if the winds shift!’The bireme pitched up another undulating hillock of water, smashed across its foamy crest, and plunged down the far side towards a deep valley. For the moment, Kelgore was lost to sight in the sea’s rolling hills. Tsonia cursed and clambered snarling up the aft castle but Ambrose merely grinned. A great warrior she might be, he thought to himself, but she cannot brook losing sight of her quarry because she cannot read the ocean.Down and down the Tyrant’s Blade dived, gaining speed as the oarsmen pulled and the sail snapped. Down, until the valley floor rose to meet them, as Ambrose knew it would. The deck yawed hard and pitched up suddenly. Above him, Ambrose heard Tsonia curse again. The rising swell had caught the ship on its back and bore her aloft towards the iron clouds above.As the turbulent waves fell away on either side, a great shout went up from the crew, for dead ahead was Kelgore’s ship, her sail fallen slack, as the wind had turned."Cleave the lines!” shouted Ambrose, though he needn’t have bothered. His crew knew their jobs and let heavy axes fall across the hempen cables at the first sign that the sail might falter and drag. The heavy canvass flapped away in the headwind, an expensive sacrifice, but dreams of wealth beyond counting had made Ambrose and his crew reckless in their thirst for Kelgore’s blood.“He turns!” shouted Tsonia from the aft castle. “Kelgore means to fight!”Thunder exploded and another fork of lightning stabbed at the sea, as if to portend the inevitable battle to come. Ahead, Ambrose could see the broadside of Kelgore’s ship turning towards them, two banks of oars dragging in the water on her port side. Kelgore’s limp sail suddenly snapped taut as it caught hold of the shifted headwind.“Ramming speed!" Ambrose bellowed. The tempo of the drum quickened and the oars beat a staccato rhythm through the violent sea. Tyrant’s Blade lurched forward into the wind like a mad dog broken free of its lead."To the bow Tsonia, and ready your blade!” he shouted up to the top of the castle.She leapt down from the roof and threw off her spray-sparkled cloak. In nothing more than a cropped halter of tarnished chainmail and a kilt of the same, Tsonia sprinted towards the front of the ship. Her sandaled step held her balance on the capricious deck and she drew a wickedly curved scimitar from its scabbard as she ran, the perfect weapon to maul unprotected flesh with quick, wide slashes.From the tiller, Ambrose couldn’t help but admire Red Tsonia’s shapely figure as she stood at the head of the mercenary crew, one hand braced against the ship’s high prow, the other idly testing the weight of her sword, her crimson locks tossed behind by the shrieking gale. Once again, lightning split the sky and thunder rolled a warning omen as the ship bore heedlessly down on its prey.“There’s a sight to daunt a man’s soul,” Ambrose said to the figure in the bright tangerine cloak who emerged from the castle. “Two fell goddesses bearing down on you with murder in their eyes. By the gods man, that’s a scene you ought to paint!”“Yes,” agreed Joras, taking in the volatile chaos unfolding before him and clinging tightly to a rail. “But to capture the proper perspective, I’d need to be on Kelgore’s ship.”Even amidst the roar of the waves and the booming thunderclaps, the impact of Tyrant’s Blade against Kelgore’s galley was ear-shattering. The heavy bronze-clad ram that the war goddess figurehead sat astride pierced the side of Kelgore’s ship in a cacophony of bursting planks, splintering oars, and wailing men as wood and flesh were torn asunder.Tsonia, nimble like a prowling cougar, used the force of the impact to propel herself onto the other ship’s deck feet first, toppling a bleeding sailor feebly clutching at half an oar sticking from his gut. She hoisted his mangled body up by an arm and tossed it towards a cluster of dumbfounded pirates stumbling in from the wounded ship’s prow, creating a gap big enough to allow Ambrose’s men to follow her onto the deck.And follow her they did, using a precariously placed boarding plank, hacking and stabbing at everything their short blades and heavy bludgeons could reach.“Keep them off me while I fetch Kelgore’s head!” she bellowed over the chaos just as sheets of rain began to pour from the roiling clouds above. Another peal of thunder rolled above the din, the deck heaved erratically beneath her feet, and Tsonia charged blindly into the deluge with no doubt she would find Kelgore at the helm, wrangling the ship and his men both.Her scimitar darted this way and that, finding ample bodies to carve open. Across the perilous deck Tsonia danced through the rainfall, plucking a wickedly barbed harpoon from the feebly twitching hand of a pirate she had just eviscerated.Over the cries of the wounded and dying and the drumming of the rain she heard a gurgling moan. Through the turmoil emerged a hulking, misshapen brute bearing down on her. A head taller and twice as wide as she, the grotesque creature hefted a gargantuan mace, the head a sharp-edged lump of dark matter lined with scintillating veins of a viridian mineral. Heedless if it hit friend or foe, the giant swept the weapon across the deck, felling a handful of his allies and clearing ample space for Tsonia.The visage of the brute was truly hideous, his features half-melted and covered in purulent boils of some fell disease. One eye was of a sickly green hue, the other of a brilliant blue. Unbridled rage flared in both as he roared, spit flying from swollen lips, rivulets of rain water trickling over thickly corded muscle. The mace came up to drive Tsonia through the deck like a nail but the flame-haired warrior was faster. With the force of a ballista she hurled the harpoon, the ghastly weapon tearing through the giant’s throat in a shower of gore. Like a grisly monument, the barbed head protruded from the back of his neck. Spewing blood and madly flailing at the object jutting from his jugular, the giant went to his knees. At last, he managed to grasp the heft of the weapon and pulled, ending his own miserable existence in self-defeating agony.A hail of arrows came down around Tsonia. Some missiles hit the fallen giant's back, others vanished overboard and into the roiling sea below. Tsonia peered through the torrent at the shadows of men atop the aft castle trying to unleash another volley of feathered death her way. For all the guile their master had displayed during his cunning evasion of the God-King’s might, his minions seemed to lack the fundamentals of warfare. No sound tactician would even consider archers in weather like this, but here they were.Chuckling to herself, Tsonia dashed towards the aft castle, her bloodstained weapon and fierce gaze enough to give pause to many a defender. Those too brave or foolish to flee she cut down as she ran, her curved blade carving horrible wounds into their bodies, only protected by wet cloth and unholy sigils tattooed onto their skin by blasphemous artists.By the time the third salvo scattered onto the precariously tilted deck, she dove headlong through the sodden curtain covering the castle’s entrance tucking into a shoulder-roll to avoid any hidden ambush. The sharpened prongs of a barbed trident scored the rain-splattered planks behind her and the anticipated defender readied his weapon for another attack. Tsonia lithely came to her feet. Her opponent, a half-naked Xhastrian with oiled skin and ceremonial braids in his coal-black hair had the greater reach, but he didn’t have her strength. She flung her scimitar spinning pommel over blade, causing him to evade to the side just as she expected. Grabbing his trident behind the viciously barbed tips, Tsonia pulled, breaking his balance and forcing him to stumble forwards or lose his weapon.The Xhastrian decided not to relinquish the trident and, thinking her unarmed and less dangerous, even put his weight behind it, hoping to put her off-balance. Tsonia let him push, allowing the weapon to glance off her shoulder. Too late the Xhastrian realized what her true plan was, but by the time he tried to pry her hands off his temples, it was too late. One quick snap to the side and the man’s neck broke. Tsonia tossed his limp body aside, scowling at the gash the trident had carved into her fair skin. The wound was already closing, her black blood hardening into a protective scab. In an hour, only the ghost of a scar would tell the tale of this exchange. A day later, even that ghost would only be a memory.Reclaiming her sword, Tsonia looked around. Another curtain covered the only other exit from the castle’s main cabin. Above the patter of rain and frantic footfalls on the roof above, Tsonia heard urgent muttering from beyond the curtain, syllables of a knotty language she knew all too well.Snarling in anger, Tsonia burst into the room beyond the curtain. Runes and sigils had been smeared onto the planks and the stink of death and magic was heavy in the air. A wizened old crone, naked but for bloody symbols painted onto her saggy skin, held the bleeding corpse of a young girl in her arms. A crimson gash on the girl’s throat told Tsonia all she needed to know. The storm tossing them about was not borne of nature, but of demonic forces.“Do not trifle with me, sell-sword,” the hag wheezed, brandishing a knife made from some large predator’s tooth. “I alone hold the storm’s true fury at bay.”The weather-witch rammed the blade into the girl’s chest, drawing thick red heart-blood. Like a living entity, the trail of blood curled upwards like a charmed serpent while the crone sang, enticing unspeakable powers from beyond the veil to do her bidding. Tsonia lunged forward to interrupt the unholy spell being invoked before her, the scimitar in her hand a crimson-stained arc of steel as she aimed for the crone’s neck.The weapon tore through flesh and bone, separating the still muttering skull from the neck it had sat upon. Blood fountained and the grinning head bounced off the floor, coming to rest near the veiled exit.“Take your lies to the Pits for all I care,” she growled, just as the planks beneath her feet rocked as if struck by an angry titan and the drumming rain above her intensified.There was a horrified yell from outside, even audible over the roar of the waves and the howl of the wind piercing every tiny opening in the ship’s hull. A moment later a horrible impact ripped through the aft castle. Beams cracked and planks split as a large weight slammed into the ceiling.“What in the Burning Hells have you done?” a cultured voice demanded to know.Tsonia tore her gaze away from the torrent of water sluicing through the shattered castle and pooling around her ankles. She saw his eyes first, black like twin obsidian beads piercing her with a gaze of dark nothingness. Behind those eyes, the man who clambered through the castle wreckage was tall and handsome despite sodden, battle-worn raiment. Long hair of sable hung wet and dripping past his sharp cheekbones and an angry snarl curled his thin lips as he snatched the severed head from the surging foam.“I have given your demon-kisser what she damn well deserved,” Tsonia spat, struggling to place her feet for a quick strike. But the heaving deck gave no quarter and left her clutching at the broken walls for balance.“You have damned us all, you stupid cow!” the empty-eyed man growled. “Like demons, storms are easy to summon but nigh impossible to control. And you just slew the one person who might have done so!”If possible, the hungry storm outside intensified, howling wind cutting through every tiny gap in the ship’s hull like the wail of unquiet dead. Ferocious waves tossed the ship. With a crash of splintering wood, a seismic wave shook the broken structure as the fragile ships were smashed together in the turbulent gale. There suddenly was the rush of water, very loud and very near.Tsonia found herself drawn to his stoic magnetism, and recognized the force of his presence instinctively. This man could be none other than Kelgore himself. His ebon eyes marked him as demonically debased, just as her own black blood marked her. It explained much about his wild success against the Xhastrians.“Since you seem to know so much about demons and storms, you must be Kelgore,” Tsonia bellowed over the clangor of the storm. “My hunt has come to an end at last!”Heedless of the precarious surroundings, Tsonia lunged, her blade aiming for the dread pirate’s heart. But the blow never connected.A murderous god’s fist shook the world as another mighty wave crashed down upon the interlocked and damaged ships. Already crippled, Kelgore’s vessel finally broke. Wood tore like paper, friend and foe were tossed like rice grains in a tornado. A widening circle of debris was tossed about by the raging waves. And Tsonia was in the midst of it all, sinking into the fathomless depths, the taunting smile of Kelgore still before her eyes.How had it all gone so wrong, Joras wondered as he clung to the rail of the tossing ship. Two weeks ago it had started out as such a pleasant adventure. The ocean breeze was warm and spiced with the scent of salt and pitch. The sea birds heralded Tyrant’s Blade as they followed the coastline under sail, saving the strength of the oarsmen. He’d filled pages of his sketchbook with Tsonia, Ambrose, and the crew.Why, he’d even managed to sketch a school of gamboling spout-fish as they playfully followed in the ship’s wake.But then two days ago the lookout had spotted the billowing smoke over the ruins of a fishing village, and soon after the lone ship that sailed away. The pleasant hunting cruise had turned into a grim pursuit as all aboard saw the Xhastrian reward close enough to claim. The seas grew choppy and the skies grew dark. The seabirds fell behind and the salt spray threatened his sketches as they chased Kelgore out into the open ocean.Joras was glad to have his precious pages wrapped in oil cloth and stowed safely in the aft castle, but it meant the image of Tsonia leaping from the crashing prow into the throng of pirates had to be roughed out in his memory alone and he always seemed to lose the little details that brought a painting of his muse to life.He wished he had the fortitude to follow Tsonia to the bow, to see and record the way Tyrant’s Blade pierced the other ship like a violent lover. From aft, he lost sight of Tsonia in the skirmish. All he could see was the feeble attempts of Kelgore’s oarsmen to dislodge the intruding ram. But the two small vessels were too tightly conjoined. Kelgore’s sail dragged the pair spiraling through the tempestuous waves and Ambrose held his rudder to pry deeper into the broken hull.With a crack of thunder the sky suddenly tore open and a deluge of rain overwhelmed sight and sound. Joras couldn’t make out more than shadows through the downpour. He clung to the railing as the deck dropped away beneath his feet, and then heaved upwards again.“The storm’s gotten worse,” he remarked with as casual a tone as he could muster while shouting to be heard.“It has,” agreed Ambrose, leaning all his weight against the tiller while straining to see the battle at the front of his ship.“Of course, I’m sure you’ve seen worse,” Joras added, trying to sound confident. “I’m sure you’ve survived dozens of squalls worse than this.”Thunder ripped the air again, and through the veil of rain Joras saw a blinding spike of lightning drive through the mast of Kelgore’s ship, shattering it like summer hay under the flail.“No,” Ambrose turned to face Joras and Joras saw the fear in the captain’s eyes. “No, this is the kind of storm that turns fishermen into farmers.”“It’s funny,” Joras yelled. “The farmers have the opposite saying about droughts.”Ambrose didn’t laugh. He abandoned the tiller to swing wildly to and fro at the whims of an angry ocean and joined Joras at the rail. Reaching into his soaking tunic, Ambrose tore a large key from the lanyard around his neck and forced into Joras hand.“Go below and free the oar-slaves,” he shouted. “None of us may survive, but I’ll not condemn them to certain death. I’ve got to tell the crew to save themselves.” With that grim instruction, Ambrose drew a brass-hilted cutlass and fought his way forward against the tide of the raging storm.The terror Joras had been wrestling with broke free and he felt its oppressive weight on his chest, buckling his knees and squeezing the air from his lungs. He’d faced peril and death often enough since he had decided to follow Red Tsonia on her quest for fame and glory, but always at the hands of a foe that could be defeated. How does one slay a storm? He could not depend on the unmatched prowess of his muse to save him this time. It was up to him.Joras summoned what courage he could find, and steeled himself to the task at hand. After Kelgore’s ship had been rammed, the crew had all gone to fight and had left the oar-slaves to recover their strength. Below his feet were fifty souls chained to their benches and Joras alone held their fates quite literally in his hand. Willing himself to release his iron grip on the rail, he charged across the pitching deck, lost his footing and tumbled through the open hatch and down the steep flight of stairs.He landed with a splash and clambered to his feet gasping for air in waist-deep water. If the maelstrom above was chaotic, the bedlam below was nightmarish. The howls of terrified men in the sightless dark drowned out the creak and groan of the stressed timber and the splash of churning water. The slaves pulled at their chains and beat at their restraints with chunks of broken wood or even their raw flesh. They knew Tyrant’s Blade was sinking, and that they had been abandoned to die.“Where are the locks!?” Joras cried over the din, desperately trying to get someone’s attention. “I have your key! By the gods, where are the locks?”As the water continued to rise, sloshing from side to side as the forsaken ship rolled in the angry storm, Joras was blindly herded towards the bow. With grasping hands guided by barely coherent cries of instruction, he found a stout padlock securing a heavy brass chain. It ran the length of the ship, passing through the shackle of each slave manning the twelve upper oars on that side. Fitting the key by touch, he turned it and released the chain.With a frantic jangle of metal, the first lucky group of oarsmen freed themselves and clambered over each other in a frenzied flight for the hatch. Those who remained bound wailed for their release even louder than before as Joras sought desperately in the dark for a matching lock on the opposite side of the hold. He found it at last, fumbled with the key, and was rewarded with a satisfying metallic clank.But as the second group of slaves fled the doomed vessel and the water crept up towards Joras’s chest, he realized with horror that the men on the lower banks of oars were secured with their own chains and locks, locks that were fastened under the churning floodwaters. Trapped below the benches of the upper oarsmen, the lower slaves were unable to even stand fully, and craned their necks to keep their shrieking faces above the rising water.Taking a deep breath, Joras dropped below the surface and found himself battered about by the surging flood. He clung to any handhold he could find in the dark, groping blindly for the hidden lock with the taste of metal on his tongue as he clenched the key in his teeth.His lungs began to burn and he feared his quest was in vain. His instincts screamed for the surface and life-giving air, but his will dwelt on the plight of those men who had no hope beyond him. Just as his will was foundering and his fear grew beyond his control, Joras’s fingers found the familiar curve of a padlock ring. Feeling for the keyhole with his thumb, he gracelessly jammed in the key and managed to turn it just as his instinct drove him back to the surface.There was no time to catch his breath. He had to go back for the key he’d left behind before he could even begin to search for the last lock. The inches of air that remained for the agonized men bound to the last oar benches waxed and waned as the waters sloshed back and forth with the rolling of the storm-tossed ship.And so back down Joras went, but in the swirling currents of the flooded hold he found that he had no more idea where to find the lock than he had the first time.Panic and guilt gripped Joras’s heart as he clawed desperately in the dark for the missing key. Had he really been so foolish as to lose it? Why had he not held his breath but a scant second longer? He endured the agony in his lungs to his very limit but had to come up for air empty-handed. The pitiful pleas of the doomed men that filled his ears sent him right back under the water with barely a breath.Then, through the crude woodwork he clung to, Joras felt more than heard the terrible creaking of timber and the shattering of the ship’s beam. He was suddenly seized by a mighty current that tore away his grip and flushed him tumbling through the dark water head over heels into the ravaged ocean until he lost all perception of up or down.Lungs aflame with need, Joras thrashed and fought in vain, weighed down by his sturdy traveling clothes and heavy orange cloak. He felt his consciousness collapsing, his limbs growing heavy, the water seeping towards his lungs. As the silence and the blackness took him, Joras found some small justice in knowing that he shared the same fate as the chained men he had failed.And suddenly there was blinding light and thunderous noise and wracking pain in his chest as he hacked and sputtered on the surface of the turbulent sea.“I should never have mocked your garish wardrobe!” shouted a familiar voice over the prattle of the rain. “The orange of your cloak is the only thing to be seen in this downpour!”“Kaela!" Joras gasped! "Gods be praised!”Tsonia dunked Joras back under the water before he had found breath. “I’ve told you not to call me that,” she admonished when she’d pulled him coughing back into the air. “And don’t give thanks too soon. This storm is ravenous, and we are still in its maw.”With powerful strokes, Tsonia dragged Joras through the rolling swells to a broken chunk of flotsam and there they clung as the witch’s storm raged around them.The first thing Ambrose saw when his senses returned was the war goddess, now a malformed, headless husk of bronze sitting astride a bent ram pointing at the churning skies above. Coughing up briny water, he forced himself into a sitting position and tried to comprehend the enormity of the destruction surrounding him.Tyrant’s Blade was no more. The prow, reinforced as it had been, loomed like a macabre monument over the bone-white beach he had found himself on. Dark shapes had washed up on the sand, splintered planks, scattered bodies, their limbs and spines twisted and broken, gulls pecking at their remains. Nothing seemed to move apart from the clouds overhead and the waves rushing up to meet the sand, occasionally depositing another piece of flotsam on the shore.Ambrose had been through his fair share of catastrophes, some self-inflicted, some visited upon him by his enemies or the capricious nature of the sea. None had even come close to the horrors he had witnessed in those last, lightning-struck moments. Torrential waves had washed men overboard screaming. Both ships had broken apart under the churning sea’s relentless assault. Ambrose too had been ripped from the deck of his trusty vessel into the pitch-black maws of the raging ocean and battered between broken timbers.Somehow, he had survived. The denizens of the deep didn’t fancy his soul this time. They didn’t let him off easy either.Moaning softly, he clutched his throbbing head. His fingers found a long gash along his temple. The cut was shallow but burned like the fires of hell. Breathing hurt too. With trembling fingers, Ambrose examined his sore rump, encountering bruises and cuts but thankfully no broken bones. Carefully testing his limbs, Ambrose fought to his knees and then his feet. His left ankle ached when he put weight upon it, but then his whole body sang in pain.Grabbing half an oar to steady himself, he dragged himself up the beach, away from the greedy ocean. Maybe fifty yards ahead, a veritable wall of green awaited him. Towering trees, sail-sized leaves and vines promised a nigh-impenetrable thicket, probably rife with sharp-toothed predators longing for easy prey. And beyond those viridian fortifications, spitting an ominous plume of smoke, a steep-sloped volcano loomed.Ambrose sighed. Finding his way off these inhospitable shores would be no easy feat. He had to assume he wasn’t the only survivor and there was a good chance that others might be Kelgore’s men, out to finish what the storm had started.Now further away from the crashing waves, Ambrose could hear other noises too, most of them unsettling and ominous. Echoing screeches or howls emanated from the jungle and a low, sonorous rumble seemed to come up through his feet, announcing that the volcano was much less quiet than he had hoped. His hand went to the sheath at his belt, but his prized blade had vanished in the maelstrom, torn from his fingers by the ravenous waters.He cast his gaze about in the vain hopes to spot it or something similar nearby, now keenly aware that he was among the few things moving on that beach and therefore easily spotted by friend and foe alike. Cursing his ankle, he hobbled back towards the shoreline, aiming for the closest pile of debris. There was no storage chest, no rack of weapons with blades, spears and axes to be found. Only a couple of pews, their construction sturdy enough to withstand a slave revolt were close at hand. A section of hull was still bolted to them. Ambrose couldn’t tell if it was a part of Tyrant’s Blade or Kelgore’s ship. There were no bodies he recognized either way. Sighing, he sank onto one of the pews, taking weight off his aching leg.Once more the stranded captain gazed at the sky. It was hard to tell the time of day, with the clouds roiling overhead. Even worse, it was hard to tell where he was. They had followed Kelgore’s ship along the Xhastrian coast before the pirate had steered away to the west, towards the open seas and out of the reach of the Green Cities. There shouldn’t have been any land in that direction, not even scattered islands were marked on the maps he had memorized so well in his years at the helm of Tyrant’s Blade. Yet here he was, on an unfamiliar beach with one leg impaired, no weapons to speak of, and a growing feeling of vulnerability and unease creeping up his spine. He would need food, water, and shelter to survive, warmth to dry himself and weapons to guard against his enemies, be they two- or four-legged.About to resume his trawl of the beach, he steadied himself for the inevitable stab of pain from his ankle when he heard voices coming closer. Muffled by the thick wood between himself and the voices, he couldn’t tell friend from foe. Bating his breath, he allowed them to pass him by, his body hidden in the shadow of the torn hull.And then Ambrose’s heart leapt with joy, for the scarlet tresses he saw could belong to only one person.“Tsaugh,” he croaked, not realizing how dry his throat was, or how blistered his lips. “Tson,” he tried again, but loud enough now to be heard over the crashing surf.Tsonia turned, and Joras with her. Both were sunburned and blistered, crusted with salt and sand. Joras leaned heavily on her shoulder, his footsteps faltering in the loose sand. Her hands were bloody to the wrist, and in one she carried a sandy thigh-bone that Ambrose preferred not to contemplate. Yet the smile that graced her lips was perhaps the loveliest thing he had ever laid eyes upon.“Do not try to speak,” she whispered when she had come back close enough to be heard. Her voice was dry and hoarse as well, but she gently sat Joras down upon the bench and leaned the two men into each other for support. The bloody femur she placed in Ambrose’s hand, closing his fingers around it like a cudgel.“Look after each other,” she wheezed. “I’ll find water and be back.”From his shoulder, Joras unslung an empty water gourd in a woven hanger, its stopper dangling by its tether. They must have found it washed ashore among the wreckage, or perhaps bobbing along with them as they drifted on the waves. Just as Joras handed the gourd up to Tsonia, they all looked up with a start.From the jungle came the sonorous rhythm of drums.“Where there are people,” Tsonia said with a smile, “there must be water.”The jungle canopy cast dancing shadows across the surface of the rippling pool that filled the hillside hollow. It was broad and deep, fed by a gurgling spring and surrounded by moss-covered stones and twisted tree roots. From the low end of the pond a trickle of water overflowed its basin and tumbled splashing down the hill, through the jungle, and eventually across the sandy beach to the sea. The small stream was too shallow and too sparse to slake a dying man’s thirst. Any who wished to drink deeply would have to follow the water upstream to the spring.And so by the spring, Kelgore waited.“The drums are moving,” he said. “They were coming from that direction. Now they’re over there.”“No, not moving,” came the reply. “Different drums. Different people. Only the message moves.”Kelgore thought about it and admitted silently to himself that it was probably true.“We should go. We should seek out those drums and turn the natives to our cause. Perhaps they can return us to civilized lands.”“No,” answered Kelgore. “We wait. Any of my men who wash ashore will find their way here. I would rather face the natives with a loyal force at my back.”“It’s dangerous. Any of the sell-swords who wash ashore will also find their way here.”“Then I will turn them to my cause or they will die.” Kelgore thumbed the blade of his knife before securing it snuggly back in its sheath.“Don’t be a fool, boy! You let your prejudice for culture and sophistication blind you. You were born to rule over all men, not just the civilized sheep of the Green Cities. Find these natives and lead them to the throne that is your destiny!”“Quiet, mother!" Kelgore snapped. "Someone’s coming.”The old corne’s severed head sat wedged in the crook of a tree branch where Kelgore hid watching the jungle pool. For too long the old witch had brow-beaten his obedience, but the tables had turned. It was she who was now dependent upon him. If he chose to feed her to the gulls or the fish, there was nothing she could do about it. He smirked with that confidence. Ignoring her scowl, he turned his attention back to the approaching footsteps.Through the jungle thicket across the pond, he spied her red hair first. He recognized her immediately, the vixen-warrior who had cut down his mother in cold blood and condemned them all to these savage shores. Unless he missed his guess, she was the mercenary known as Red Tsonia or Bloody Tsonia depending on who spun her tale. Kelgore once thought it presumptuous that she should take the name of the ancient warrior queen, but having seen her quality in person, he thought it might be apt after all.“Kill her!” hissed his mother, beneath the drone of the beating drums, the calls of tropical birds, and the rustle of the foliage in the sea breeze. “Avenge me!”“Shush!” he insisted.The flame-haired warrior spied the pool of sweet water and broke into a run. She dropped to her knees and scooped double handfuls to her mouth, letting the excess spill down her chest and stomach and thighs. When she had drunk her fill, she took an empty water gourd from her shoulder and plunged it bubbling beneath the surface.When she withdrew the gourd, Kelgore saw her hesitate before plugging it with its stopper. She looked back over her shoulder, then turned to face the drums in the distance. She sat for a moment in contemplation and then poured the water slowly over her own head, rolling her neck and massaging the clean water through her salt-stiffened hair.Tsonia closed her eyes, luxuriating in the cool water that rinsed away the ocean’s residue.Kelgore saw his chance to ambush her, to strike swiftly in her vulnerability, but he tarried.Tsonia filled the gourd again to finish rinsing her hair. She wiped the sand and grime from her face, and poured the last of the water down her chest. Kelgore could feel his manhood swell as Tsonia laid the gourd aside and pulled the ragged chainmail vest off over her head, exposing her ample breasts.“I would have her,” he murmured, as she bathed her bare shoulders, chest, and midriff by the burbling jungle spring. “I shall turn her to our cause and I shall have her.”“Fool!” spat his mother. “This is no fish-monger’s daughter, no doe-eyed waif. She is demon tainted, much as you were.”“Yes,” agreed Kelgore, feeling the lust rising in his chest as he watched Tsonia bathe. “But just think of the grandchildren she could give you.”“Dozens of bellies swell with my grandchildren all along the Xhastrian coast. How many grandchildren do I need?”“My mind is set and I shall not be dissuaded, mother. Now be silent, or will feed your tongue to the gulls!”“You’ve grown insolent since that bitch killed me,” he heard her grumble under her breath, but she said no more.Across the pond, Tsonia filled the gourd again, then stood and began to unfasten the chainmail skirt that hung from her shapely hips. Kelgore felt a certain satisfaction when he saw her jump as he stepped out from the cover of vines and thicket. He held his hands empty at his sides, but there was a hypnotic twinkle in his obsidian eyes.“You can be none other than Red Tsonia,” he called to her. “I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced.”Her eyes roamed over him, taking his measure. They lingered on his groin for a heartbeat before wandering higher, meeting his eye. Before he could exert his formidable will through his demon-tainted eyes though, she bent low and poured water from the gourd into her palm, continuing her bath. Kelgore exhaled slowly. Dumb luck made her evade his beguiling gaze this time, but there would be ample opportunity.“Sneaking up on me while I’m bathing isn’t the wisest course of action,” Tsonia said, her wet hands roaming her muscular thighs.“And yet, you seem oddly at ease for being naked and helpless,” Kelgore said.Tsonia poured more water, slowly rinsing her hips and the faint tuft of mousy brown fuzz covering her femininity.“What makes you think I’m helpless?” she wondered. “In less than a heartbeat, I could be at your throat, gutting you with that knife on your belt and you would be helpless to stop me.”Kelgore closed his hand around the bronze-wound hilt of his knife. “Then why don’t you? You were sent to kill me, were you not?”Unperturbed, Tsonia washed her sex, her face hidden by her unbound mane of fiery tresses. “Indeed. The God-King gave me ample reason to slay you on the spot. But until I know how to return to Xhastria to claim the reward, I’d rather not have to carry around a decaying corpse.” Her head came up, flashing a cocky smile.Kelgore cleared his throat, ready to employ his charming voice as he’d done so often with officials and paupers both, nudging their inhibitions aside, making them listen to what Kelgore deemed reasonable. “I might be willing to follow you,” he crooned, his sultry voice reverberating in a certain way. “There is no reason for us to be enemies, at least not for the time being. You will find me a very willing hostage. Let it be said that Kelgore knows how to please.”He relinquished the hilt of his knife and caressed the sizable bulge in his robes, the embers of lust flaring to fiery life. Not only did he relish the sight of the naked warrior before him, her ample curves and taut limbs promising exhausting revelry, but the feeling of his mind ensnaring hers, the delicious sensation of his hypnotic tendrils exerting their subtle, yet overwhelming influence. Oh how he would delight in ravishing her, coaxing unspeakable pleasure from her body and mind both!Tsonia had stopped washing herself. Instead she swayed gently to the cadence of his words, her hands wandering her body, as if she were presenting herself for his approval, a quizzical smile on her ruby lips. “What do you have in mind?” she wondered.“Take hold of me,” Kelgore murmured, parting the salt-stiffened fabric of his clothes and offering his throbbing lance for her fingers. His free hand touched her luxurious, wet mane of fiery tresses, guiding her face towards his yearning manhood. Her breath was hot on his skin and her lust rushed up through his fingertips as they touched her scalp.At her touch, Kelgore’s vision blurred as he latched on to one of her secrets, wrapped in shadows at the edge of her mind, but right at the surface where the most important secrets are always kept. Kelgore became Tsonia. He saw through her eyes, heard through her ears, and relived the memory she wanted to bury but couldn’t.He was bound naked to an altar made from some strange green rock. The surface had been polished smooth by aeons of use. Thousands of bodies had languished here until they met their demise. Icons wrought from ribs and spines and skulls adorned torch lit alcoves. Naked priests and priestesses, their bodies painted with unholy symbols writhed around the altar, their voices brittle from hours of chanting. And towering over him, confusion and lust flickering in its monstrous eyes, was the jackal-headed demon Q'alan, his jet-black skin slick with sweat, his prodigious erection dripping with hellish seed.“More.” Kelgore heard himself beg through Tsonia’s swollen lips. The burning taste of demon seed clogged his throat. Patches of the vile stuff caked his breasts, his stomach. A veritable lake of it pooled under his behind. And his hand wandered downwards, splaying open his hungry cunt for the demon to see. Thick rivulets of demonic seeds, mixed with virginal blood dribbled over his fingers and onto the stained altar.“Give me more,” Tsonia’s voice demanded as she spread her legs as far as the chains around her ankles allowed. She rammed two fingers into her sex, displacing another gob of the foul seed. “You are not sated yet, are you?”Her voice was hoarse and rough, but there was something in it, a force even the mighty Q'alan could not resist. Growling, hot spittle dripping from its jagged teeth, it grasped Tsonia’s hips. A large, bulbous sensation pressed against her rear, demanding entry to that as-of-yet unspoiled orifice. Tsonia groaned and wailed as the demonic phallus forced her open, but her moans turned to cries of ecstasy as Q'alan’s mighty spear filled her up. The demon gasped and frothed at the maw as it relentlessly pounded her, trying to break that insolent human who dared to challenge him.And yet, he couldn’t. He was as much a slave to her body as she was helpless to escape the pummeling Q'alan unleashed upon her.Hours passed in a moment of Kelgore’s memory. The jackal-headed demon took Tsonia every which way, pouring unending streams of his demonic seed down her throat, cunt, or ass. His claws left bloody furrows in her unblemished flesh, but the wounds seemed to heal as soon as he gouged them. And instead of tiring, becoming weaker under his monstrous assault, she seemed to thrive, urging him on for another fuck.And then the unthinkable happened. Q'alan tired. His rampant shaft, which had been erect for days and able to spew gallons of his demonic fluids, flagged. Tsonia, breasts heaving in heat, grinned wantonly up at him. One of the chains holding her arms to the altar had broken and she beckoned, curling her fingers at her cum-streaked lips.“Have me drink from your well once more, oh mighty Q'alan,” she groaned, her body making disgusting, sucking sounds as she slithered on the cum-slick stones. “Your seed is sweet nectar to me.”Q'alan threw his head about in irritation. The priests and priestesses, by now only whispering their binding chants in hoarse, broken voices, were barely able to stand. Snarling, he lashed out, cutting open a priest from head to groin. Hot, bloody intestines fell to the floor in sloshing tangles. The man was too hoarse to even scream as his life cascaded onto the befouled tiles. But the deed was done. The circle was broken. Q'alan was no longer bound.Spitting curses upon his inept cult, the jackal-headed monster vanished in a gout of foul-smelling vapor, leaving behind a tangle of confused and fear-stricken priests. When they saw Tsonia reach for the second chain holding her body to the altar, the cultists clambered over one another to flee from the torch lit catacomb.The chain broke as Tsonia flexed her arm, her body infused with Q'alan’s hellish strength. There were no wounds. There was no pain, not even from her ravaged nethers which the demon had abused for uncountable hours. Her bones were stronger than the rusted shackles tethering her to the soiled stone altar and she broke them with contemptuous ease.Tsonia came to her feet, wishing she could break her mother’s neck as easily as she could break these chains. Kelgore understood how Tsonia’s own mother had offered her virgin daughter to Q'alan for the promise of influence, riches and power.His vision snapped back, the flickering images of the underground crypt replaced with the twilit glade. There were no chanting priests, just the irritated chatter of jungle birds and the unceasing beat of the distant drums. He was standing next to the spring, his fingers entwined in Tsonia’s magnificent locks, her lips locked around his throbbing manhood, her tongue a fluttering sensation almost as sweet as the taste of the secret he had plucked from her.“Yes,” he purred, slowly rolling his hips forwards. “You and I shall make a fine pair. Demon-blessed, you and I. The world will tremble at our offspring’s might!”Her answer was a hungry growl deep in her throat. Strong hands dug into his buttocks and her mouth exerted delicious suction. This was different from the scared waifs he had coerced into his bedchambers, different from the docile noblewomen he had twisted and broken for his amusement.Kelgore found it hard to find words under Tsonia’s dexterous assault. One hand dove under his clothes, finding his sac. Expertly, her calloused fingers caressed his balls.He didn’t dare use his voice, for fear of inadvertently breaking the spell he had just put upon her. None of his prior victims had displayed such vigor under his control. But then, he never had tried charming another demon-touched being before.Tsonia’s growl had turned into a playful purr. One hand pumped his shaft, her other was busy between her own thighs. Kelgore slowly fucked her glorious mouth, amazed at how deep she was able to take his lance. She spurred him on with moans, with a clawed hand to his buttocks and he obliged, feeding her his shaft until his loins curled up in that all-too familiar sensation of imminent release.Once more he drove his lance home, eagerly devoured by the red-headed temptress kneeling by the spring, and hot spurts of seed poured from him. Kelgore loosened a triumphant yell as his body shook from an almighty climax, more satisfying and visceral than anything those tepid Xhastrian whores had been able to coax from him!A low, ominous growl answered him, shattering the magic of the moment. Kelgore’s spell, tenuous as it had been, faded away. Tsonia, Kelgore’s seed dripping down her chin, shook her head as if she had just woken from a perturbing dream. Her eyes caught him, robes wide open, his erection still proudly on display and a grim expression settled on her beautiful face, promising the inevitability of untold torment.A flicker of comprehension dawned and she flung herself at him, tearing his knife from its sheath as she barreled into him. They tumbled into the grass. Tsonia, gloriously naked and wet sat astride his prone form, one hand a crushing vise around his throat, the knife hovering above his eye, poised for a lethal descent.“I don’t know what fell magic's you employed on me, but I hope for your sake there is a good reason why I have your taste all over my mouth!”Kelgore, stunned by her sudden fury and for once at a loss for words, noticed movement in the branches above. A tall, man-like shadow watched with unknowable intent. Two more shades silently joined on adjacent branches. They carried nets made from vines and short spears tipped with stone points. Inquisitive eyes flicked this way and that. Their heads inclined as if in conversation, but whatever whispers they uttered were unheard over the rumble of the drums.There was no air to breathe. There was no air to bargain with. He could wait and hope the strangers would free him from Tsonia’s grasp, but Kelgore doubted he could hold on for that long. He’d rather take his chances with her than the ominous strangers. Croaking a warning, he raised his arm, pointing.Tsonia opened her mouth in a stillborn question. Before she could give words to her thoughts, a feathered dart sprouted from her neck. On instinct, Tsonia pulled it free, relinquishing Kelgore’s throat. Greedily, he sucked air into his burning lungs as Tsonia came to her feet, warily searching for the attackers.Ever the opportunist, Kelgore grasped the chance at freedom. He mustered his voice. “Drop the knife!”Tsonia obeyed, relinquishing his blade. Then her fighting instincts took over and she tumbled to the side, just as tall, muscular shapes arose from the undergrowth around them. Kelgore plucked his weapon from the ground and came to his feet in a scrabbling run, sprinting towards the tree where he had left his mother’s head. The first dart missed him by a finger’s breadth, but the second found its mark.A soothing calm fell over Kelgore as he stood there, watching Tsonia naked and grappling with a green-skinned savage. Slowly sinking to his knees, he was certain he saw Tsonia’s hips roll in a particular motion against that man’s groin. An irrational burst of jealousy gripped his heart. How could she still be so full of energy while he only wanted to sprawl on the floor and sleep until that beautiful tranquility had passed? How was she so willing to copulate with a beastly savage while he was here, still horribly aching for her body?The last thing Kelgore saw before sleep took him was a grinning face, tongue wagging as someone or something slung him over her shoulder.The stone blade was aimed at her ribs but Tsonia held it at bay and threw her weight to the left. The man or beast or whatever it was that grappled her shifted his feet to compensate. For the brief moment he was off balance, Tsonia caught hold of a jungle root, anchored herself, and with a mighty twist of her hips she sent her attacker sprawling to the ground.Was this creature even a man? Only the leather skin wrapped around his loins and the strap slung over one shoulder suggested any degree of civilization. His skin mottled in shades of olive, sage, and lime, was unlike anything he had seen before.Atop his powerfully muscled torso the head had a feral, beastial quality. Short fur rippled in the breeze and thin flews curled around canine teeth in a face that was more muzzle than mouth. The man’s arms ended in strong, clawed hands. A sinuous, striped tail curled from a shapely backside and the hind legs bent backwards were built for long, powerful strides and ferocious jumps.As Tsonia stood, the jungle seemed to twist around her, a verdant kaleidoscope of madness. The beast man didn’t regain his feet as much as he sort of oozed into an upright posture. The short spear undulated in his grip. The tangle of jungle roots beneath her feet shifted as if she stood upon a lattice of ship’s cables and the constant drum beat became muddled and lethargic.Tsonia shook her head to clear the dart’s poison from her vision, but it did no good.With a growl of anger, the beast man charged flapping like a banner in the wind. Tsonia leapt away from his attack leaving her feet and hands behind. She found herself next to the bouncing pool, next to her discarded chainmail top, which crawled into her hand and wrapped itself around her fingers.Before she could reorient her senses, her foe was upon her, clawed fingers at her throat and the point of his spear driving into her shoulder. Black blood hissed against the flint.With a roar of pain, Tsonia bashed him across his stubby snout with her handful of rubbery chainmail knocking loose a fang from his slavering lips. It left an arc of crimson hanging in the air like a sanguine rainbow. She brought a knee up into his groin where his twisted loincloth provided no protection. The beast howled but did not release his grip. She could feel his claws piercing her throat like gimlets twisted into cork. Again she brought the chainmail flailing down on his head, this time ripping away a pointed ear.The beast man released her throat, and caught her wrist in a grip like twine wrapped around bread dough. It was the opening Tsonia had hoped for, and she followed his motion adding her own considerable strength to his momentum, rolling the pair of them down the colorful brook that scarpered idly away from the spring pool.They tumbled down the slope and the world seemed reluctant to drag itself around in a spiral. Tsonia felt as if everything was made of honey as green and brown and claw and chain were mingled by a slow spoon. She saw the breath expelled from her lungs as she landed hard on top of her attacker, his fuzzy chest against the bare skin of her neck and shoulders. His arms wrapped around her and his clawed hands raked at her exposed throat and midriff.A bloody cry caught in Tsonia’s throat. She clutched at the beast’s pulpy arms, hoping to arrest their assault when she noticed the long, trailing appendage wavering gently from her shoulder. It must be the spear haft, still embedded within her like a spent lover.With all the focus she could muster, Tsonia released her attacker and took the spear in her grip. Clenching her teeth and straining wary thews with all her demon-blessed might, Tsonia forced the spear point through her shoulder, out of her back, and into the heaving chest of the screaming creature beneath her.For another moment he fought on, even as his life slipped away from him.Tsonia felt the flesh of her throat and her stomach melding, knitting together like a weaver’s handiwork. She yanked the spear out of her own body, black blood hissing and steaming along its length, and she pushed herself up and up and up to her feet. She hadn’t realized the ground was so low.The jungle continued to swirl around her, twisting and undulating. The spear felt pliant in her hand, as if made of soft leather, but she knew it could not be so. She shook her head again to clear the fog of the dart’s poison, but to no avail.Above her, a coarse series of syllables were barked in a language Tsonia didn’t know. She blinked into the twining tendrils of the jungle and saw another man, like this one, waiting by the flat ground by the pool. He carried a short spear in one hand and a net in the other. Both seemed to flutter in time to the sonorous beat of the distant drums.“So your people have honor of a sort?” Tsonia asked, mounting the hill. “You could have joined your friend and ganged up on me, but instead you waited for single combat. You have my respect, but not my mercy.”She was battered and bloody, her skin caked with mud and what must have been Kelgore’s seed. But she recognized a challenge when it was issued and while she didn’t know what would happen if she declined, she knew she was too vain to find out.“I don’t suppose you’d let me dress first?”The second foe barked a single word, hefted his spear and began to circle Tsonia cautiously, a wary eye on the captured spear and the chainmail hauberk she wielded.“No? No, I suppose you’re almost as naked as I am. Fair is fair after all.”Tsonia lowered her weight and readied for his attack, trying to hold her opponent in focus as the jungle blended and kneaded itself around them.The beast man lunged, stabbing with his spear, an experimental strike to gauge Tsonia’s speed. She parried it easily, although the spear shafts felt supple as they met, the clack of contact numb and muted. Whipping her handful of chainmail, she attempted to catch her
Think 6th Street could use a couple tweaks? Confucius and Fresh do too! They also couldn’t resist a chance to chime in on the Nicki Minaj/Megan Thee Stallion situation. Hip Hop Facts and Confucius Reads the News are both in fine form this week, as is Fresh’s Unpopular Opinion for Austin’s prospects as a “Texas […] The post Revamping 6th Street/Snarling Nikki appeared first on KUT & KUTX Studios -- Podcasts.
A few blocks away from Baltimore Harbor where many a sailor have made port and ships have launched for centuries, I walk into a tan and green-shingled building lined inside and out with tattoo memorabilia. Snarling panthers, rickety ships, pin-up girls: slices of Americana-style ink hang over century-old tattoo guns as their modern successors whizz permanent art into the skin of ready and willing canvases. Plus there's little banter and fun, free of charge. This is the Baltimore Tattoo Museum. It's been around for decades and outside of its civilian clientele, the shop has seen more than its fair share of service members and veterans looking to get permanently stamped with classic off the wall designs or custom-made ink. The shop is also home to a cast of characters, including its owner Chris Keaton, who have many stories to tell of the best and worst ideas that have walked through the door…and for those tales, well – I'll let you be the judge. Appearing in this episode: Kelsey Baker, Drew F. Lawrence, Zach Fryer-Biggs, Chris Keaton and the Baltimore Tattoo Museum tattoo artists.
We are live at Nova Open 2023! Will Chris get the chance to insta-kill Philip AGAIN in D&D? Want a eco-friendly card game with more “bark” in it? Plus, we talk with Adam and Vince from Snarling Badger Studios about their various tabletop miniatures games and going from tabletop players to making a tabletop company.
We are live at Nova Open 2023! Will Chris get the chance to insta-kill Philip AGAIN in D&D? Want a eco-friendly card game with more “bark” in it? Plus, we talk with Adam and Vince from Snarling Badger Studios about their various tabletop miniatures games and going from tabletop players to making a tabletop company.
Fox and Shane look into one of the newer companies on the block, Snarling Badger Studios. Run by Tabletop Minion's Uncle Atom and Vince Ventruella of Warhammer Weekly, they are the minds behind three miniature agnostic skirmish games, Reign in Hell, Space Station Zero and Majestic 13. NEW CHANNEL: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC2W6nuo5m0K2_FUXYxjHZHg Check out The Shaka Project and check in on your mates. Use code: SHANE10 for 10% off! DriveThruRPG has the best digital RPG titles! WargameVault has the best Wargame PDFs!
In hour 1, Chris talks about why Biden's dogs keep biting members of law enforcement until they are sent away to a camp upstate. What is making them so aggressive? For more coverage on the issues that matter to you, download the WMAL app, visit WMAL.com or tune in love on WMAL-FM 105.9 from 9:00am-12:00pm Monday-Friday To join the conversation, check us out on Twitter @WMAL and @ChrisPlanteShow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
AP correspondent Donna Warder reports on the U.S. passport backlog.
Synopsis On today's date in 1909, Richard Strauss's opera Elektra had its premiere in Dresden. The libretto, a free adaptation of the grim, ancient Greek tragedy by Sophocles, was by the Austrian poet and playwright Hugo von Hofmannsthal. In ancient Greek tragedies, violence occurred off-stage, and for his libretto, Hofmannsthal honored that tradition. But the music of Strauss evoking the tragedy's violence unleashed a huge orchestra with a ferocity that stunned early listeners. After its American premiere, one New York critic wrote of “a total delineation of shrieks and groans, of tortures physical in the clear definition and audible in their gross realism . . .Snarling of stopped trumpets, barking of trombones, moaning of bassoons and squealing of violins.” Even Strauss himself later admitted Elektra (quote) “penetrated to the uttermost limits of … the receptivity of human ears,” and what he called his “green horror” opera might cause him to be type-cast as a purveyor of creepy-crawly music. And so, Strauss prudently suggested to Hofmansthal “Next time, we'll write a MOZART opera.” Almost two years later to the day, on January 26, 1911, their “Mozart” opera, Der Rosenkavalier, or the The Rose Bearer premiered. It's set in 18th century Vienna, and for this opera Strauss included anachronistic, but eminently hummable waltz tunes. Music Played in Today's Program Richard Strauss (1864 –1949) Elektra Alessandra Marc, sop.;Vienna Philharmonic; Giuseppe Sinopoli, conductor. DG 453 429 Richard Strauss Der Rosenkavalier Waltz Suite Philadelphia Orchestra; Eugene Ormandy, conductor. Sony 60989 On This Day Births 1851 - Flemish composer Jan Blockx, in Antwerp; 1886 - German composer and conductor Wilhelm Furtwängler, in Berlin; 1911 - American composer and pianist Julia Smith, in Denton, Texas; 1913 - Polish composer Witold Lutoslawski, in Warsaw; 1921 - American composer and conductor Alfred Reed, in New York City; Premieres 1817 - Rossini: opera, "La Cenerentola" (Cinderella), in Rome at the Teatro Valle; 1902 - Franz Schmidt: Symphony No. 1, in Vienna; 1909 - R. Strauss: opera "Elektra," in Dresden at the Hofoper, conducted by Ernst von Schuch, with soprano Annie Krull in the title role; 1946 - R. Strauss: "Metamorphosen," in Zürich; 1957 - Walton: Cello Concerto, by the Boston Symphony conducted by Charles Munch, with Gregor Piatigorsky the soloist; 1963 - Karl Amadeus Hartmann: Symphony No. 8, by the West German Radio Symphony, Rafael Kubelik conducting; 1987 - Paul Schoenfield: "Café Music" for piano trio at a St. Paul Chamber Orchestra concert. Links and Resources On Richard Strauss More on Richard Strauss
Winter is packing a wallop, snarling roads, cancelling flights and classes, knocking out power, darkening the Guthrie and a host of other events. This is an evening update from MPR News, hosted by Tim Nelson. Music by Gary Meister.
AP correspondent Julie Walker reports on Winter Weather
Javier Zamora travelled alone from El Salvador to the US when he was just nine years old. He had been living with relatives after his parents migrated to the US, but longed to be in his mother's arms. His parents hired a ‘coyote', or people smuggler, to bring him across the borders, but the trip went wrong. Javier was abandoned by the coyote, and found himself reliant on strangers for survival as he journeyed for two months by bus, boat, and on foot, nearly dying in the Sonoran Desert. Javier is now a poet in the US, whose work explores the trauma of that experience, and what it means to be an undocumented migrant. Presenter: Jo Fidgen Producer: Rebecca Vincent
Ann is using her binoculars to try and spot someone who is very good at camouflage along the Ord River in WA. She's glad to be safe in a boat - as these animals have the world's strongest bite.
Lost in Eros, Book II: The Forest – Part 11Amazons Defeated by Kung Fu Master, disguised as a sexy witch.By BradentonLarry - Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.Shelonda & Don defeated the Amazon tribal sisters, and gained the release of Toshia.“I don't like this plan, Don,” Nicole had said. “I don't want to see any more killing.”“Neither do I,” Don replied. “We're going to do everything we can to avoid seriously hurting anyone. How much first aid do they teach pre-med students?”The answer had been not much, but Nicole had been a girl scout and knew some rudiments. So, she was assigned the role of medic for the rescue mission.“There it is!” Don said, pointing ahead to where he could just see the old ruined castle poking up out of the forest. “Let's find someplace to land not too far from it.”In another minute, responding to Amy's mental commands, the carpet settled down in a small clearing just a short, wooded distance from the castle's gate. Don, Shelonda and Nicole disembarked – Nicole quite eagerly – and Amy had the carpet carry her back up into the sky. Amy had her instructions. She hadn't liked the thought of being left out of the main action, but had eventually accepted Don's reasoning. At the very least, if Don's plan didn't work, they wouldn't all be captured.With Don taking the lead, the three on the ground set off through the forest toward the castle of the Sisterhood. It was only a short walk before they came to another, much larger, clearing in front of the gate of the castle. The gate itself was very old, mostly of wood and actually in surprisingly good condition. It had two valves, and the one on the right was standing open. Two women were there, apparently on guard, though they had placed their spears against the wall and were practicing what looked like crude judo take-downs. Don and the others got half way across the clearing to them before either of them noticed.“Hey! Who the hell are you?” said one, a tall woman with short, jet-black hair. To her credit, her partner, a shorter blonde with longer hair, immediately went to grab both spears and took the opportunity to give a high-pitched whistle through the open gate.“I'm Don, and this is my student Shelonda and our medical assistant Nicole,” Don said amiably as he continued to approach the castle.“Medical assistant?” the guard asked as her companion brought her spear.“To help if anyone gets injured.”“OK, that's far enough,” the guard said as she leveled her spear at Don's chest, “or you're going to get injured permanently.”Don frowned a little at that. He actually suspected that the XYZ would help his, or anyone's, body repair any injury short of death, but he didn't bother to explain this to the dark-haired woman. Instead he said, “We're here to collect our friend, who we believe has been a guest of the Sisterhood for the last few days.”“Oh you are, are you?” said a voice from above the gate.Don looked up to see a beautiful woman with long black hair spilling over her shoulders and her armor standing on the battlements over the gate. She certainly seemed to have the regal bearing that would go along with leading the Sisterhood. He decided at that moment that this woman would respond better to a particular approach – one of individual dominance.“I am,” Don nodded. “She became separated from us, and has been here. I would be grateful if you returned her.”“And if I don't?” asked the woman, confirming Don's guess as to her role in the Sisterhood.“Then I'll have to make you,” Don smiled.The woman laughed derisively, and then said, “Kill him, and take the women.”Without hesitation, the two guards drew back to thrust at Don with their spears. Before they could attack though, his staff came up and spun around in a clean arc through the place where the black-haired one's head had been, carrying her down into a crumpled heap on the ground where she lay unconscious. Immediately, Don reversed the momentum of his staff, batting the blonde's spear aside, and then brought the other end of the staff around to strike the woman's knee hard enough to buckle her leg painfully in the wrong direction. She cried out in pain before Don stretched her on the ground with a blow to the head. The entire exchange had taken less than three seconds.Don held up his left hand to the half dozen warrior women who had by now come through the gate and who were ready to charge him.“We do not want to fight the Sisterhood,” he said in a loud, calm voice. “We only want our friend, Toshia, who is here in your castle. Give her to us and Nicole here will tend to these good women and we will be on our way. If you do not give her to us, though, I must challenge your leader to personal combat.”“We do not stoop to fight with men,” one of the women in front of Don sneered. She was a big redhead with a spray of freckles across her face.“That sounds like cowardice to me,” Don smiled back at her.“Take them down,” the woman on the wall ordered.At once, the six women, led by the freckled redhead, charged Don and the girls. Don's hypothesis was that the XYZ was supercharging more than just their sex drives, and that if he and Shelonda deliberately sought to direct their energies into good kung fu they would be nearly unstoppable fighting machines. Moreover, he had repeatedly noticed the flexible nature of Eros, in that what a focused mind wanted often made itself available. Don and Shelonda were now throwing themselves into the fray, letting the XYZ course through their veins and expecting the world to bend itself to their will. They leapt higher, dodged faster, and hit harder than seemed humanly possible. In addition, they had a particular advantage thanks to the Wizard; their staffs had been enchanted. Though they were still the light, flexible staffs Don and Shelonda had brought from the Manor, they were now, for all intents and purposes, unbreakable, and struck with a force much greater than normal. There were additional abilities as well, but they were trying to hold back on those, both to keep at least one of them in reserve as a surprise and because they really didn't want to severely injure anyone.It only took a minute or so before all six of the sisters were lying on the ground around Don and Shelonda, either unconscious or groaning in pain. Nicole quickly began moving about them, checking for broken bones and beginning to bandage ankles and knees.“So,” Don called to the rest of the Sisterhood, who by now were gathered outside the gate or along the walls, “you will not stoop to fight a man, but you will stoop to attacking us three to one. That's very brave. I'm quite impressed.”“I'll take you one-on-one, little man,” said a muscular woman with short brown hair. “When I'm done with you, I'll fuck your ass with that staff of yours.”“Always the ass, eh, Wanda?” said a woman from the crowd.Wanda laughed and stepped forward hefting a good sized battle axe in her strong hands.Don smiled at her, “If you're nice, maybe I'll fuck your ass with my ‘staff' before I'm done with you.”The women seemed to like this and laughed at and with Wanda. Though she didn't really seem to mind the teasing, Wanda chose this moment to charge Don. It was a clumsy attack, and Don had no trouble slipping out of the way. His staff flew around and smacked Wanda hard on the butt. He thought the force of her charge would require a few more steps before she could turn, but Wanda surprised him by spinning tightly and swinging her axe across at his mid-section. Don sprang back in time, but only just. With impressive speed, she changed the direction of the axe, swept it up and then arcing down at Don's head. Rather than dodging though, Don stepped in and threw his staff up in both hands, to catch the axe haft as it came down. Neither staff nor axe gave way, as Don expected, though Wanda was surprised that the axe hadn't continued right through the apparently more flimsy staff. Don took advantage of her surprise by kicking her very hard in the crotch. Though this didn't have exactly the same effect it might have on a male, it still hurt, and Wanda winced and pulled back. Don pressed the attack, spinning his staff in a withering barrage of strikes aimed at Wanda's head. While she was able to successfully block each strike, Don was able to throw her off balance enough that he was able to slip in close and punch her sharply in the gut. With a loud “Oof!” Wanda doubled over, leaving herself open to a decisive rap on the skull that laid her out on the ground.There was a small burst of applause, abruptly cut off, as Don turned to look over the gathered sisters with a cheerful yet derisive smile. He was less astounded by his speed and strength than he was by his endurance; he was barely breathing hard. “Anyone else want to do your leader's fighting for her?”“You're pretty good with that stick,” said a beautiful, tall blonde wearing her hair in braids, as she stepped forward. She was wearing a blue sleeveless tunic hanging down almost to her knees and cinched at the waist, leather wrist bands and sandals laced up the length of her calves. She had all the beauty of Nordic women and a muscular build that indicated both strength and speed. She also seemed to be smiling at Don with genuine good nature. She asked, “Can you measure up without a weapon?”Don nodded and said, “Let's find out.” He tossed his staff to Shelonda and bowed to the blonde, adding, “I'm Don.”“Brigit,” she nodded.Don was acutely aware of the fact that he had just given any attentive spectators a good demonstration of his basic fighting style. This gave Brigit a possible advantage. She certainly had the fire of intelligence burning in her eyes, so Don assumed she had an actual advantage. As a result of these thoughts he did not rush in to attack her, though a fast step in and side-kick was usually a good move in this kind of situation. He relaxed his shoulders, slowed his breathing, and waited for Brigit to make the first move.Brigit eyed Don calmly as she began to circle him. He noted that she had her hands raised and open, suggesting that she might be a grappler. Though she was ordinarily someone he might enjoy grappling, Don had little taste for wrestling as a form of combat. He was out-massed by the big woman; speed, agility and determination were his assets, two-thirds of which would be sacrificed in a clinch.He turned as she moved, eventually turning his back on the bulk of the Sisterhood. Don actually thought they were too caught up in the fun of watching the fight to actually interfere, and he was sure Shelonda would alert him if someone made an unsporting move. Rather than attack him, the sisters were taunting both Brigit and him, telling them to get on with it.Finally, Brigit did just that, taking a few quick steps in Don's direction, but he only danced back laughing. She came in again, this time faster and swinging her right fist in a roundhouse. Don had bounced back, though, and to his left. Before she could readjust, he landed two quick blows on her right side. It felt like he'd punched a wall.Brigit rounded on him, but he had already skipped back out of the way. Her smile suggested that his punches hadn't made much of an impression. Don didn't mind that; he was still sizing her up.She came in fast again, but Don could tell she was a bit hesitant; expecting him to evade her she was holding back. Don responded by closing the distance between them. He blocked the blow she aimed at the left side of his head with his forearm and simultaneously punched straight ahead at her nose. There was a satisfying crunching sound as his fist connected. Don didn't leave his fist out there long, but snapped it back in time to block the punch she threw at the right side of his head. If he'd been slower, Brigit's right-left combination would certainly have knocked him senseless; the woman was certainly powerful. He brought his knee up and quickly snapped his heel into Brigit's gut, pushing the two of them apart again.Brigit's nose was bleeding profusely, and she wasn't smiling any more. Don had to admit that this bout wasn't turning out as playfully as he'd hoped. He thought he'd give the sister a moment to wipe some of the blood off her face, but she came at him again. This time, she tried to close faster and punch straight at him. Don dropped low, under her reach and hit her in the side again, this time much harder. They passed each other and turned, but Brigit took the opportunity to swing her fist back-handed at Don's head. He only pulled back far enough to take the blow on his cheek. The force of the impact knocked him to the side a bit and he tasted his own blood.Brigit came at him quickly, and Don had to backpedal and block furiously to avoid getting seriously hurt. Finally he was able to strike upward with the heel of his hand at Brigit's chin. Her head snapped back and she stumbled backward. Don sprang forward, taking two steps and then was high in the air, his foot snapped around with blinding speed and Brigit's head twisted to the side. Don and Brigit landed on the ground at the same time, he lightly on his feet and she heavily on her back. As the crowd of women cheered in spite of themselves, Don knelt quickly to make sure that Brigit was still breathing. Nicole hurried up to check as well.Before they could say a word to each other, Brigit opened her eyes and said, “Damn! That was fast.”Don smiled down at her, touched his cheek which was already red and starting to swell, and said, “It was an honor, ma'am.”“Next time, I'm going to kick your ass, you know.”“I'll look forward to it,” he grinned.“Enough!” a familiar voice barked over the hubbub at the gate.Don looked up to see that the beautiful sister who had been talking to him from the wall had come down to the gate. Since she was smart enough to lead this group of strong-willed women, Don figured she must realize her predicament. If she had the other women attack Don she would appear weak, even if they succeeded in defeating Shelonda and him, which some of them must now be thinking was no sure thing. If she handed over Toshia she would appear weak. If she just shut the gates on them and let them go away she would appear weak. In fact, if she did anything other than fight him she would appear weak and her authority would be undermined. Bullies were so easy to manipulate, Don thought. Of course, she must now see that there was a very good chance that she would be beaten by Don, which would be no less a disaster, at least from her perspective.She came out in front of the small crowd of women, wearing a metallic breast plate that still managed to show off some cleavage, a skirt of chainmail, metal greaves and bracers. Her midriff was impractically bare, though Don certainly didn't mind that. Her jet black hair had now been pulled back into a long ponytail. Don thought she was staggeringly beautiful, and the haughty attitude only made her more appealing for some reason. In her hand was a gleaming long sword in particularly good condition.“You fight well for a man,” she sneered.Don, who had stood up, bowed a little in acknowledgement.“I give you the opportunity to go in peace.”“We will gladly do so if you return our friend to us,” Don answered.“We will not give you what is rightfully ours.”“Rightfully yours?” Nicole interjected indignantly.“Hush,” Don said quietly. Then, back to the leader of the Sisterhood, “We will not leave without her.”“Very well,” she nodded. “I will make you submit to me, or you will die.”“Or you will submit to me,” Don smiled easily.“I do not submit to men,” she spat.“Not to men, perhaps, but you will to me.”She scowled at him angrily, obviously unused to such impertinence. Finally she said, “I will not fight you here; the ground is littered with your sparring partners. Come inside and fight me in our courtyard. No one but me will harm you.”Don nodded his acceptance, and turned to take his staff back from Shelonda, who took the opportunity to say, “I don't know, Don, she looks mean.”“Yeah, she does, doesn't she?” he grinned.As the three of them approached the gate the sisters made way for them, and Nicole said, “Just remember, I don't have any bandages big enough for sword wounds.”They were led to an open area inside the castle where the sisters obviously worked out and practiced with their weapons. Some of the sisters and some smaller, obviously less assertive women quickly dragged various bags and targets out of the way, clearing the space for the impending duel. The other sisters climbed up on ledges and walls around the courtyard to make sure they had a good view. Don noticed that Brigit and Wanda were able to come in and take their places on a crumbled section of wall. There were a number of doorways leading into the courtyard, and, opposite the point where they'd entered, a set of broad stone stairs led to another open area, where a bunch of chairs were arranged.As soon as everything had been cleared from the area sufficiently, the leader of the sisters took her place near the center of the courtyard, and said, “If you need a sword, Brigit can lend you hers.”“No, that's alright; I wouldn't want to take a chance on cutting that beautiful body of yours,” Don smiled easily, as if he was flirting with someone at the local coffee shop.“I assure you I have no such reservations about cutting yours.”“I think that's a lie… What's your name, by the way?” Don began to slowly walk toward her across the open ground, his staff in his right hand.“Daphne,” she snapped. “What do you mean 'you think that's a lie'?”“Well, you might just be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure you don't really want to hurt me.”“Oh,” she laughed, “you're quite wrong.”Don shook his head a little, and said, “No, I don't think I am. I think you're starting to think it would be nice if I beat you and carried you off somewhere and ravished you.”“How dare you!”“I'll bet it's been a very long time since you were well and properly ravished.”“What in the world makes you think I'd have the slightest interest in being ravished by anyone like you?”“The fact that you've let me get this close to you,” Don smiled. He was only a foot away from her. Close enough to see her blue eyes quite clearly enough to read the surprise and then anger in them.“You bastard!” she hissed and leapt back, simultaneously bringing her sword up and around in a blinding arc.Don laughed as he skipped back, temporarily out of range. Daphne followed though, spinning her sword in a furiously fast series of arcs in front of her.“That's fancy,” Don nodded, “but I can do it too.” He began to spin his staff in a figure-eight motion covering his front and sides.Snarling, Daphne leapt in and swung, counting on her steel blade to cut or bash its way through Don's screen. Instead the sword glanced off, and Don effortlessly reversed the staff's direction to hit Daphne's exposed side. As before, the staff's enchantments imparted greater force than the momentum Don provided would indicate. Cursing under her breath, Daphne snapped her blade around in an arc aimed directly at Don's head. Twisting quickly, Don brought his much lighter weapon up in time to block the strike, catching the blade in the middle of the staff between Don's hands.There was the briefest pause when it was clear to Daphne that her sword should have broken the staff. Don smiled and said, “Yeah, that's not going to happen, my dear.”“Is your head unbreakable?” she asked, and then quickly snapped her blade around, over her head, to slash at Don from the opposite side. Don blocked this easily, though the edge of her sword was only inches from his scalp. Apparently unconcerned, Don let Daphne wear herself out with a series of strong, fast cuts that he blocked almost casually.When it seemed that she might be slowing down, but before she could change her tactics on her own, Don changed his. He dropped low, into a proper low stance, letting her sword whistle by high over his head, and drove the end of his staff hard into Daphne's belly. He followed this by sweeping the staff at her shapely legs. He managed to catch one and threw it out from under her. Off balance from this double assault, Daphne stumbled backward. Don pursued her, pressing his advantage. It was Daphne's turn to retreat and parry. Three times Don managed to hit her, once more in the gut, once hard across the arm, leaving a bright red mark, and once a glancing blow to the head, which left a slight gash and a smear of blood.This last hit seemed to irritate Daphne more than the others and she launched into another enthusiastic offensive, which was actually rather successful. She managed to leave a shallow cut along Don's left shoulder and actually achieved a solid hit on Don's right shin, which would have crippled him if he hadn't been wearing his shin guards, fresh from the Wizard's wardrobe. Pausing slightly in surprise or anger, Daphne let Don get close enough that he struck out with the heel of his hand, hitting her hard in the center of her chest just above her chest plate where it showed off her cleavage. Daphne gasped and stumbled back again, this time backing up until she tripped a bit on the steps at her back.To her credit, Daphne recovered quickly, stepped up on the stairs, and had her sword at the ready in the second it took Don to launch his next offensive. He drove her up the stairs until she was on the level with the chairs. He heard the sisters clamoring behind him to keep the fight in view. There was a brief exchange during which the tip of Daphne's sword scratched over the surface of Don's chest armor, Don's staff cracked Daphne's right thigh hard enough to make her cry out and then to favor that leg, and a sword blow which was deflected by Don's bracer scored a bloody wound on the back of his left forearm. Don seemed not to notice the two wounds he had sustained, and continued to drive Daphne back toward the chairs behind her. When she came up against one she had to devote a minute bit of attention to keeping her balance and maneuvering around these obstacles, and this minor distraction provided Don with the chance to strike her right wrist hard enough to make her drop her sword. As the blade clattered to the stone floor, Don dropped his staff, and closed in.Kicking the chair behind her away, Daphne was just barely able to twist aside to avoid the kick Don aimed at her midsection. She got her hands and guard up fast enough to deflect the series of blows he aimed at her head, and then gave him a fast jab which connected with his brow just above his left eye. Moving in, pushing her back further, Don ignored the blood that ran down past his eye, and threw a furious combination of punches and knee strikes at Daphne.Then, suddenly, Daphne was falling backward into a big hole in the floor that Don had only barely noticed. A bit surprised, he still managed to catch her right wrist, but, rather than allowing him to catch her fall, this only meant that he was pulled down with her.Together they landed on what seemed to be a very large, thick mattress. Don landed on top of Daphne, though he was able to brace himself on impact so that he didn't crush her too much. There was a moment when he was able to take in the surroundings – there were bars around the mattress, surprised, naked men looking in at them from the other side, a battered old mirror, and apparently freshly laundered red sheets – before Daphne began to struggle to push him off her. Don was done playing with her, though.He caught her beautiful throat in his left hand and squeezed just a little. Looking down into her livid face, he smiled and said, “Now, that's enough. I won and you know it.”Daphne spat at him, and he tightened his grip a bit. Don shoved his leg between hers and used his position and leverage to push her strong thighs apart. Reaching down with his right hand, he pushed his palm up along the inside of her leg, under her chainmail skirt. Sure enough, when he got there, he found her already very wet.Don chuckled a little and a drop of blood from his forehead dripped onto her cheek. As he stroked her moist lips, she continued to struggle but not very convincingly – at least not to Don or to her. He smiled and asked, “Still going to say you're not interested?”“I goddamn hate you!” she insisted. Then Don pushed his fingers up inside her and she groaned a little in the bottom of her throat.“I don't think that's the same thing,” Don smirked as he began to work his fingers in and out of her, cupping his hand over her sex, palm rubbing against her clit. He was aware that the men were watching them and that the sisters had gathered around the opening through which Don and Daphne had fallen. What they saw was a combination of Don pinning Daphne to the mattress while he roughly handled her and Daphne sort of struggling while clearly responding to his touch on her.“You've fucking ruined everything, you bastard,” she breathed through clenched teeth.“Do you want me to stop?”“Would you stop if I said yes?” she scowled.“No.”Daphne closed her eyes again and let a tremor of pleasure pass over her. So quietly that only Don could hear her, she said, “Good.”Don pushed his thigh up between her legs, taking the place of his hand against her crotch. As he fumbled at his pants to push them and his cup down to free his already half hard cock, Don leaned down and kissed Daphne. Shocked, she first let him kiss her, then she began to respond, and then she remembered herself and bit at his lip, drawing a bit more blood. Don just laughed and shoved her back into the mattress with the hand around her throat. He knew full well that he wasn't exerting anywhere near enough force to actually hold her down if she really wanted to get out from under him.Then, using his legs and his right hand, Don shoved Daphne's legs apart and settled between them. He shoved her metal skirt up, took his now very hard cock in hand and pushed it down between her legs. Don felt her warm, wet lips embracing his head and then he pushed himself slowly into her. As he filled her tight pussy, he leaned down and said, “You're mine now, Daphne.”“I still hate you,” she growled even as she was reaching down to grab his ass and pull him into her.“Say it,” he said.“I'm yours now,” she breathed, “you bastard.”Laughing, Don shoved in the rest of the way, feeling his head hitting her cervix. He rocked there for a moment inside her and pressed against her, before pulling almost all the way out and then driving in again. After several such long, deep thrusts, he felt her hand slipping around his neck and then holding the back of his head. Daphne pulled him down to her and kissed him, not grudgingly but passionately, hungrily. They were kissing and biting at each other as his cock slipped in and out of her fiery pussy. Don maintained this steady, slow, deep fucking until he felt Daphne clenching and squeezing on him, gasping around his tongue and lips as she came long and hard.Don pulled back a bit, looking down at her and asked, “Who else has ever beaten you?”“No one,” she answered proudly.Don began to fuck in and out of her again, and said, “So there's no reason you should ever bow down to anyone but me, is there?”She smiled up at him, and for the first time the smile seemed completely without malice, “No, there certainly isn't.”“I'm glad we had this little chat,” he chuckled and began to pump in and out of her with increased vigor. Daphne wrapped her long, strong legs around him and pulled him in closer. Don commenced fucking her hard and fast. He had promised her ravishment and that's what he was delivering. Claiming her body as the rightful prize in their fight, Don took her as his own, pushing himself into her with all the energy he had used to best her in combat. Daphne now gave no appearance of anything but enthusiastic participation. No one watching could have any doubt that she was enjoying every moment of the fucking Don was giving her. When she cried out with her second orgasm, Don felt his own spilling over. He thrust deep into her and filled her with his cum, shuddering and trembling as he spewed his seed deep inside her, claiming her in as intimate a way as he could think of.When Don finally stopped coming, and had caught his breath, he began to look around a bit for the first time since he had begun taking Daphne. Before he could get a good look, though, she pulled his head down and gave him a brief, passionate kiss. When he pulled back to smile down at her, she whispered, “Thank you.”“My pleasure,” Don smiled warmly at her. For a fleeting moment, he thought it would be fun to stay here with this Amazon queen and rule this little corner of the forest. Then he remembered what he could never fully forget – the need to find Toshia. Withdrawing from Daphne's warm, wet embrace, Don sat back on his haunches. A burst of applause from the men on the other side of the bars around them surprised him. His first instinct was to grin and bow, but he recalled the dynamic he had no interest in undermining and scowled at the men imperiously, and said in a commanding voice, “Don't think any of you have earned the right to disrespect this woman, your mistress.”The applause died off immediately.To be continued.By BradentonLarry for Literotica
Lost in Eros, Book II: The Forest – Part 11Amazons Defeated by Kung Fu Master, disguised as a sexy witch.By BradentonLarry - Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.Shelonda & Don defeated the Amazon tribal sisters, and gained the release of Toshia.“I don't like this plan, Don,” Nicole had said. “I don't want to see any more killing.”“Neither do I,” Don replied. “We're going to do everything we can to avoid seriously hurting anyone. How much first aid do they teach pre-med students?”The answer had been not much, but Nicole had been a girl scout and knew some rudiments. So, she was assigned the role of medic for the rescue mission.“There it is!” Don said, pointing ahead to where he could just see the old ruined castle poking up out of the forest. “Let's find someplace to land not too far from it.”In another minute, responding to Amy's mental commands, the carpet settled down in a small clearing just a short, wooded distance from the castle's gate. Don, Shelonda and Nicole disembarked – Nicole quite eagerly – and Amy had the carpet carry her back up into the sky. Amy had her instructions. She hadn't liked the thought of being left out of the main action, but had eventually accepted Don's reasoning. At the very least, if Don's plan didn't work, they wouldn't all be captured.With Don taking the lead, the three on the ground set off through the forest toward the castle of the Sisterhood. It was only a short walk before they came to another, much larger, clearing in front of the gate of the castle. The gate itself was very old, mostly of wood and actually in surprisingly good condition. It had two valves, and the one on the right was standing open. Two women were there, apparently on guard, though they had placed their spears against the wall and were practicing what looked like crude judo take-downs. Don and the others got half way across the clearing to them before either of them noticed.“Hey! Who the hell are you?” said one, a tall woman with short, jet-black hair. To her credit, her partner, a shorter blonde with longer hair, immediately went to grab both spears and took the opportunity to give a high-pitched whistle through the open gate.“I'm Don, and this is my student Shelonda and our medical assistant Nicole,” Don said amiably as he continued to approach the castle.“Medical assistant?” the guard asked as her companion brought her spear.“To help if anyone gets injured.”“OK, that's far enough,” the guard said as she leveled her spear at Don's chest, “or you're going to get injured permanently.”Don frowned a little at that. He actually suspected that the XYZ would help his, or anyone's, body repair any injury short of death, but he didn't bother to explain this to the dark-haired woman. Instead he said, “We're here to collect our friend, who we believe has been a guest of the Sisterhood for the last few days.”“Oh you are, are you?” said a voice from above the gate.Don looked up to see a beautiful woman with long black hair spilling over her shoulders and her armor standing on the battlements over the gate. She certainly seemed to have the regal bearing that would go along with leading the Sisterhood. He decided at that moment that this woman would respond better to a particular approach – one of individual dominance.“I am,” Don nodded. “She became separated from us, and has been here. I would be grateful if you returned her.”“And if I don't?” asked the woman, confirming Don's guess as to her role in the Sisterhood.“Then I'll have to make you,” Don smiled.The woman laughed derisively, and then said, “Kill him, and take the women.”Without hesitation, the two guards drew back to thrust at Don with their spears. Before they could attack though, his staff came up and spun around in a clean arc through the place where the black-haired one's head had been, carrying her down into a crumpled heap on the ground where she lay unconscious. Immediately, Don reversed the momentum of his staff, batting the blonde's spear aside, and then brought the other end of the staff around to strike the woman's knee hard enough to buckle her leg painfully in the wrong direction. She cried out in pain before Don stretched her on the ground with a blow to the head. The entire exchange had taken less than three seconds.Don held up his left hand to the half dozen warrior women who had by now come through the gate and who were ready to charge him.“We do not want to fight the Sisterhood,” he said in a loud, calm voice. “We only want our friend, Toshia, who is here in your castle. Give her to us and Nicole here will tend to these good women and we will be on our way. If you do not give her to us, though, I must challenge your leader to personal combat.”“We do not stoop to fight with men,” one of the women in front of Don sneered. She was a big redhead with a spray of freckles across her face.“That sounds like cowardice to me,” Don smiled back at her.“Take them down,” the woman on the wall ordered.At once, the six women, led by the freckled redhead, charged Don and the girls. Don's hypothesis was that the XYZ was supercharging more than just their sex drives, and that if he and Shelonda deliberately sought to direct their energies into good kung fu they would be nearly unstoppable fighting machines. Moreover, he had repeatedly noticed the flexible nature of Eros, in that what a focused mind wanted often made itself available. Don and Shelonda were now throwing themselves into the fray, letting the XYZ course through their veins and expecting the world to bend itself to their will. They leapt higher, dodged faster, and hit harder than seemed humanly possible. In addition, they had a particular advantage thanks to the Wizard; their staffs had been enchanted. Though they were still the light, flexible staffs Don and Shelonda had brought from the Manor, they were now, for all intents and purposes, unbreakable, and struck with a force much greater than normal. There were additional abilities as well, but they were trying to hold back on those, both to keep at least one of them in reserve as a surprise and because they really didn't want to severely injure anyone.It only took a minute or so before all six of the sisters were lying on the ground around Don and Shelonda, either unconscious or groaning in pain. Nicole quickly began moving about them, checking for broken bones and beginning to bandage ankles and knees.“So,” Don called to the rest of the Sisterhood, who by now were gathered outside the gate or along the walls, “you will not stoop to fight a man, but you will stoop to attacking us three to one. That's very brave. I'm quite impressed.”“I'll take you one-on-one, little man,” said a muscular woman with short brown hair. “When I'm done with you, I'll fuck your ass with that staff of yours.”“Always the ass, eh, Wanda?” said a woman from the crowd.Wanda laughed and stepped forward hefting a good sized battle axe in her strong hands.Don smiled at her, “If you're nice, maybe I'll fuck your ass with my ‘staff' before I'm done with you.”The women seemed to like this and laughed at and with Wanda. Though she didn't really seem to mind the teasing, Wanda chose this moment to charge Don. It was a clumsy attack, and Don had no trouble slipping out of the way. His staff flew around and smacked Wanda hard on the butt. He thought the force of her charge would require a few more steps before she could turn, but Wanda surprised him by spinning tightly and swinging her axe across at his mid-section. Don sprang back in time, but only just. With impressive speed, she changed the direction of the axe, swept it up and then arcing down at Don's head. Rather than dodging though, Don stepped in and threw his staff up in both hands, to catch the axe haft as it came down. Neither staff nor axe gave way, as Don expected, though Wanda was surprised that the axe hadn't continued right through the apparently more flimsy staff. Don took advantage of her surprise by kicking her very hard in the crotch. Though this didn't have exactly the same effect it might have on a male, it still hurt, and Wanda winced and pulled back. Don pressed the attack, spinning his staff in a withering barrage of strikes aimed at Wanda's head. While she was able to successfully block each strike, Don was able to throw her off balance enough that he was able to slip in close and punch her sharply in the gut. With a loud “Oof!” Wanda doubled over, leaving herself open to a decisive rap on the skull that laid her out on the ground.There was a small burst of applause, abruptly cut off, as Don turned to look over the gathered sisters with a cheerful yet derisive smile. He was less astounded by his speed and strength than he was by his endurance; he was barely breathing hard. “Anyone else want to do your leader's fighting for her?”“You're pretty good with that stick,” said a beautiful, tall blonde wearing her hair in braids, as she stepped forward. She was wearing a blue sleeveless tunic hanging down almost to her knees and cinched at the waist, leather wrist bands and sandals laced up the length of her calves. She had all the beauty of Nordic women and a muscular build that indicated both strength and speed. She also seemed to be smiling at Don with genuine good nature. She asked, “Can you measure up without a weapon?”Don nodded and said, “Let's find out.” He tossed his staff to Shelonda and bowed to the blonde, adding, “I'm Don.”“Brigit,” she nodded.Don was acutely aware of the fact that he had just given any attentive spectators a good demonstration of his basic fighting style. This gave Brigit a possible advantage. She certainly had the fire of intelligence burning in her eyes, so Don assumed she had an actual advantage. As a result of these thoughts he did not rush in to attack her, though a fast step in and side-kick was usually a good move in this kind of situation. He relaxed his shoulders, slowed his breathing, and waited for Brigit to make the first move.Brigit eyed Don calmly as she began to circle him. He noted that she had her hands raised and open, suggesting that she might be a grappler. Though she was ordinarily someone he might enjoy grappling, Don had little taste for wrestling as a form of combat. He was out-massed by the big woman; speed, agility and determination were his assets, two-thirds of which would be sacrificed in a clinch.He turned as she moved, eventually turning his back on the bulk of the Sisterhood. Don actually thought they were too caught up in the fun of watching the fight to actually interfere, and he was sure Shelonda would alert him if someone made an unsporting move. Rather than attack him, the sisters were taunting both Brigit and him, telling them to get on with it.Finally, Brigit did just that, taking a few quick steps in Don's direction, but he only danced back laughing. She came in again, this time faster and swinging her right fist in a roundhouse. Don had bounced back, though, and to his left. Before she could readjust, he landed two quick blows on her right side. It felt like he'd punched a wall.Brigit rounded on him, but he had already skipped back out of the way. Her smile suggested that his punches hadn't made much of an impression. Don didn't mind that; he was still sizing her up.She came in fast again, but Don could tell she was a bit hesitant; expecting him to evade her she was holding back. Don responded by closing the distance between them. He blocked the blow she aimed at the left side of his head with his forearm and simultaneously punched straight ahead at her nose. There was a satisfying crunching sound as his fist connected. Don didn't leave his fist out there long, but snapped it back in time to block the punch she threw at the right side of his head. If he'd been slower, Brigit's right-left combination would certainly have knocked him senseless; the woman was certainly powerful. He brought his knee up and quickly snapped his heel into Brigit's gut, pushing the two of them apart again.Brigit's nose was bleeding profusely, and she wasn't smiling any more. Don had to admit that this bout wasn't turning out as playfully as he'd hoped. He thought he'd give the sister a moment to wipe some of the blood off her face, but she came at him again. This time, she tried to close faster and punch straight at him. Don dropped low, under her reach and hit her in the side again, this time much harder. They passed each other and turned, but Brigit took the opportunity to swing her fist back-handed at Don's head. He only pulled back far enough to take the blow on his cheek. The force of the impact knocked him to the side a bit and he tasted his own blood.Brigit came at him quickly, and Don had to backpedal and block furiously to avoid getting seriously hurt. Finally he was able to strike upward with the heel of his hand at Brigit's chin. Her head snapped back and she stumbled backward. Don sprang forward, taking two steps and then was high in the air, his foot snapped around with blinding speed and Brigit's head twisted to the side. Don and Brigit landed on the ground at the same time, he lightly on his feet and she heavily on her back. As the crowd of women cheered in spite of themselves, Don knelt quickly to make sure that Brigit was still breathing. Nicole hurried up to check as well.Before they could say a word to each other, Brigit opened her eyes and said, “Damn! That was fast.”Don smiled down at her, touched his cheek which was already red and starting to swell, and said, “It was an honor, ma'am.”“Next time, I'm going to kick your ass, you know.”“I'll look forward to it,” he grinned.“Enough!” a familiar voice barked over the hubbub at the gate.Don looked up to see that the beautiful sister who had been talking to him from the wall had come down to the gate. Since she was smart enough to lead this group of strong-willed women, Don figured she must realize her predicament. If she had the other women attack Don she would appear weak, even if they succeeded in defeating Shelonda and him, which some of them must now be thinking was no sure thing. If she handed over Toshia she would appear weak. If she just shut the gates on them and let them go away she would appear weak. In fact, if she did anything other than fight him she would appear weak and her authority would be undermined. Bullies were so easy to manipulate, Don thought. Of course, she must now see that there was a very good chance that she would be beaten by Don, which would be no less a disaster, at least from her perspective.She came out in front of the small crowd of women, wearing a metallic breast plate that still managed to show off some cleavage, a skirt of chainmail, metal greaves and bracers. Her midriff was impractically bare, though Don certainly didn't mind that. Her jet black hair had now been pulled back into a long ponytail. Don thought she was staggeringly beautiful, and the haughty attitude only made her more appealing for some reason. In her hand was a gleaming long sword in particularly good condition.“You fight well for a man,” she sneered.Don, who had stood up, bowed a little in acknowledgement.“I give you the opportunity to go in peace.”“We will gladly do so if you return our friend to us,” Don answered.“We will not give you what is rightfully ours.”“Rightfully yours?” Nicole interjected indignantly.“Hush,” Don said quietly. Then, back to the leader of the Sisterhood, “We will not leave without her.”“Very well,” she nodded. “I will make you submit to me, or you will die.”“Or you will submit to me,” Don smiled easily.“I do not submit to men,” she spat.“Not to men, perhaps, but you will to me.”She scowled at him angrily, obviously unused to such impertinence. Finally she said, “I will not fight you here; the ground is littered with your sparring partners. Come inside and fight me in our courtyard. No one but me will harm you.”Don nodded his acceptance, and turned to take his staff back from Shelonda, who took the opportunity to say, “I don't know, Don, she looks mean.”“Yeah, she does, doesn't she?” he grinned.As the three of them approached the gate the sisters made way for them, and Nicole said, “Just remember, I don't have any bandages big enough for sword wounds.”They were led to an open area inside the castle where the sisters obviously worked out and practiced with their weapons. Some of the sisters and some smaller, obviously less assertive women quickly dragged various bags and targets out of the way, clearing the space for the impending duel. The other sisters climbed up on ledges and walls around the courtyard to make sure they had a good view. Don noticed that Brigit and Wanda were able to come in and take their places on a crumbled section of wall. There were a number of doorways leading into the courtyard, and, opposite the point where they'd entered, a set of broad stone stairs led to another open area, where a bunch of chairs were arranged.As soon as everything had been cleared from the area sufficiently, the leader of the sisters took her place near the center of the courtyard, and said, “If you need a sword, Brigit can lend you hers.”“No, that's alright; I wouldn't want to take a chance on cutting that beautiful body of yours,” Don smiled easily, as if he was flirting with someone at the local coffee shop.“I assure you I have no such reservations about cutting yours.”“I think that's a lie… What's your name, by the way?” Don began to slowly walk toward her across the open ground, his staff in his right hand.“Daphne,” she snapped. “What do you mean 'you think that's a lie'?”“Well, you might just be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure you don't really want to hurt me.”“Oh,” she laughed, “you're quite wrong.”Don shook his head a little, and said, “No, I don't think I am. I think you're starting to think it would be nice if I beat you and carried you off somewhere and ravished you.”“How dare you!”“I'll bet it's been a very long time since you were well and properly ravished.”“What in the world makes you think I'd have the slightest interest in being ravished by anyone like you?”“The fact that you've let me get this close to you,” Don smiled. He was only a foot away from her. Close enough to see her blue eyes quite clearly enough to read the surprise and then anger in them.“You bastard!” she hissed and leapt back, simultaneously bringing her sword up and around in a blinding arc.Don laughed as he skipped back, temporarily out of range. Daphne followed though, spinning her sword in a furiously fast series of arcs in front of her.“That's fancy,” Don nodded, “but I can do it too.” He began to spin his staff in a figure-eight motion covering his front and sides.Snarling, Daphne leapt in and swung, counting on her steel blade to cut or bash its way through Don's screen. Instead the sword glanced off, and Don effortlessly reversed the staff's direction to hit Daphne's exposed side. As before, the staff's enchantments imparted greater force than the momentum Don provided would indicate. Cursing under her breath, Daphne snapped her blade around in an arc aimed directly at Don's head. Twisting quickly, Don brought his much lighter weapon up in time to block the strike, catching the blade in the middle of the staff between Don's hands.There was the briefest pause when it was clear to Daphne that her sword should have broken the staff. Don smiled and said, “Yeah, that's not going to happen, my dear.”“Is your head unbreakable?” she asked, and then quickly snapped her blade around, over her head, to slash at Don from the opposite side. Don blocked this easily, though the edge of her sword was only inches from his scalp. Apparently unconcerned, Don let Daphne wear herself out with a series of strong, fast cuts that he blocked almost casually.When it seemed that she might be slowing down, but before she could change her tactics on her own, Don changed his. He dropped low, into a proper low stance, letting her sword whistle by high over his head, and drove the end of his staff hard into Daphne's belly. He followed this by sweeping the staff at her shapely legs. He managed to catch one and threw it out from under her. Off balance from this double assault, Daphne stumbled backward. Don pursued her, pressing his advantage. It was Daphne's turn to retreat and parry. Three times Don managed to hit her, once more in the gut, once hard across the arm, leaving a bright red mark, and once a glancing blow to the head, which left a slight gash and a smear of blood.This last hit seemed to irritate Daphne more than the others and she launched into another enthusiastic offensive, which was actually rather successful. She managed to leave a shallow cut along Don's left shoulder and actually achieved a solid hit on Don's right shin, which would have crippled him if he hadn't been wearing his shin guards, fresh from the Wizard's wardrobe. Pausing slightly in surprise or anger, Daphne let Don get close enough that he struck out with the heel of his hand, hitting her hard in the center of her chest just above her chest plate where it showed off her cleavage. Daphne gasped and stumbled back again, this time backing up until she tripped a bit on the steps at her back.To her credit, Daphne recovered quickly, stepped up on the stairs, and had her sword at the ready in the second it took Don to launch his next offensive. He drove her up the stairs until she was on the level with the chairs. He heard the sisters clamoring behind him to keep the fight in view. There was a brief exchange during which the tip of Daphne's sword scratched over the surface of Don's chest armor, Don's staff cracked Daphne's right thigh hard enough to make her cry out and then to favor that leg, and a sword blow which was deflected by Don's bracer scored a bloody wound on the back of his left forearm. Don seemed not to notice the two wounds he had sustained, and continued to drive Daphne back toward the chairs behind her. When she came up against one she had to devote a minute bit of attention to keeping her balance and maneuvering around these obstacles, and this minor distraction provided Don with the chance to strike her right wrist hard enough to make her drop her sword. As the blade clattered to the stone floor, Don dropped his staff, and closed in.Kicking the chair behind her away, Daphne was just barely able to twist aside to avoid the kick Don aimed at her midsection. She got her hands and guard up fast enough to deflect the series of blows he aimed at her head, and then gave him a fast jab which connected with his brow just above his left eye. Moving in, pushing her back further, Don ignored the blood that ran down past his eye, and threw a furious combination of punches and knee strikes at Daphne.Then, suddenly, Daphne was falling backward into a big hole in the floor that Don had only barely noticed. A bit surprised, he still managed to catch her right wrist, but, rather than allowing him to catch her fall, this only meant that he was pulled down with her.Together they landed on what seemed to be a very large, thick mattress. Don landed on top of Daphne, though he was able to brace himself on impact so that he didn't crush her too much. There was a moment when he was able to take in the surroundings – there were bars around the mattress, surprised, naked men looking in at them from the other side, a battered old mirror, and apparently freshly laundered red sheets – before Daphne began to struggle to push him off her. Don was done playing with her, though.He caught her beautiful throat in his left hand and squeezed just a little. Looking down into her livid face, he smiled and said, “Now, that's enough. I won and you know it.”Daphne spat at him, and he tightened his grip a bit. Don shoved his leg between hers and used his position and leverage to push her strong thighs apart. Reaching down with his right hand, he pushed his palm up along the inside of her leg, under her chainmail skirt. Sure enough, when he got there, he found her already very wet.Don chuckled a little and a drop of blood from his forehead dripped onto her cheek. As he stroked her moist lips, she continued to struggle but not very convincingly – at least not to Don or to her. He smiled and asked, “Still going to say you're not interested?”“I goddamn hate you!” she insisted. Then Don pushed his fingers up inside her and she groaned a little in the bottom of her throat.“I don't think that's the same thing,” Don smirked as he began to work his fingers in and out of her, cupping his hand over her sex, palm rubbing against her clit. He was aware that the men were watching them and that the sisters had gathered around the opening through which Don and Daphne had fallen. What they saw was a combination of Don pinning Daphne to the mattress while he roughly handled her and Daphne sort of struggling while clearly responding to his touch on her.“You've fucking ruined everything, you bastard,” she breathed through clenched teeth.“Do you want me to stop?”“Would you stop if I said yes?” she scowled.“No.”Daphne closed her eyes again and let a tremor of pleasure pass over her. So quietly that only Don could hear her, she said, “Good.”Don pushed his thigh up between her legs, taking the place of his hand against her crotch. As he fumbled at his pants to push them and his cup down to free his already half hard cock, Don leaned down and kissed Daphne. Shocked, she first let him kiss her, then she began to respond, and then she remembered herself and bit at his lip, drawing a bit more blood. Don just laughed and shoved her back into the mattress with the hand around her throat. He knew full well that he wasn't exerting anywhere near enough force to actually hold her down if she really wanted to get out from under him.Then, using his legs and his right hand, Don shoved Daphne's legs apart and settled between them. He shoved her metal skirt up, took his now very hard cock in hand and pushed it down between her legs. Don felt her warm, wet lips embracing his head and then he pushed himself slowly into her. As he filled her tight pussy, he leaned down and said, “You're mine now, Daphne.”“I still hate you,” she growled even as she was reaching down to grab his ass and pull him into her.“Say it,” he said.“I'm yours now,” she breathed, “you bastard.”Laughing, Don shoved in the rest of the way, feeling his head hitting her cervix. He rocked there for a moment inside her and pressed against her, before pulling almost all the way out and then driving in again. After several such long, deep thrusts, he felt her hand slipping around his neck and then holding the back of his head. Daphne pulled him down to her and kissed him, not grudgingly but passionately, hungrily. They were kissing and biting at each other as his cock slipped in and out of her fiery pussy. Don maintained this steady, slow, deep fucking until he felt Daphne clenching and squeezing on him, gasping around his tongue and lips as she came long and hard.Don pulled back a bit, looking down at her and asked, “Who else has ever beaten you?”“No one,” she answered proudly.Don began to fuck in and out of her again, and said, “So there's no reason you should ever bow down to anyone but me, is there?”She smiled up at him, and for the first time the smile seemed completely without malice, “No, there certainly isn't.”“I'm glad we had this little chat,” he chuckled and began to pump in and out of her with increased vigor. Daphne wrapped her long, strong legs around him and pulled him in closer. Don commenced fucking her hard and fast. He had promised her ravishment and that's what he was delivering. Claiming her body as the rightful prize in their fight, Don took her as his own, pushing himself into her with all the energy he had used to best her in combat. Daphne now gave no appearance of anything but enthusiastic participation. No one watching could have any doubt that she was enjoying every moment of the fucking Don was giving her. When she cried out with her second orgasm, Don felt his own spilling over. He thrust deep into her and filled her with his cum, shuddering and trembling as he spewed his seed deep inside her, claiming her in as intimate a way as he could think of.When Don finally stopped coming, and had caught his breath, he began to look around a bit for the first time since he had begun taking Daphne. Before he could get a good look, though, she pulled his head down and gave him a brief, passionate kiss. When he pulled back to smile down at her, she whispered, “Thank you.”“My pleasure,” Don smiled warmly at her. For a fleeting moment, he thought it would be fun to stay here with this Amazon queen and rule this little corner of the forest. Then he remembered what he could never fully forget – the need to find Toshia. Withdrawing from Daphne's warm, wet embrace, Don sat back on his haunches. A burst of applause from the men on the other side of the bars around them surprised him. His first instinct was to grin and bow, but he recalled the dynamic he had no interest in undermining and scowled at the men imperiously, and said in a commanding voice, “Don't think any of you have earned the right to disrespect this woman, your mistress.”The applause died off immediately.To be continued.By BradentonLarry for Literotica
Sherlock Holmes had noticed something about dogs and the way they behave and how this could help in detective work. For example who ever saw a frisky dog in a gloomy family or a sad dog in a happy one. Snarling people have snarling dogs and dangerous people have dangerous dogs. What now interests Holmes is why Professor Presbury's faithful wolfhound Roy, endeavours to bite him. The dog until recently most devoted animal had attacked his master twice but had attacked no one else. . . Duration: 30:56 Starring: Tom Conway, Nigel Bruce Broadcast Date: 17th March 1947
Home for Horny Monsters: Squatter's Rights - Mike inherits an old house with fuckable monster girls! (part 3)By writerannabelle. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. “Give up, Tink. I've won,” Mike panted, sweat pouring off his body. “It's over.”Tink fixed him with an angry stare, which quickly melted into defeat. Her large eyes pooled with tears, and she turned her face away from Mike.“Tink lose. Tink give up goblin home.” She snuffled, the dirt on the floor billowing away from her. “Tink leave, and no come back.”“Wait, what?” Tink had relaxed beneath Mike, so he shifted his body so that he wasn't crushing her any longer. “No, Tink, you don't have to leave, I just want my tools so I can fix the fountain.”“Goblin Law. We fight over home. Loser leave, never come back.” She tried to rise, but Mike wasn't having it. He knew that Naia would be disappointed in him if he managed to lose one of the inhabitants of the house so quickly.And honestly, was he even as entitled to the home as they were? They had been here longer, he was just the current human legally entitled to the place. Watching the goblin weep beneath him, he couldn't help but feel extremely bad. Tink obviously came from a culture he wasn't going to understand overnight, but this was a problem he needed to take care of right this second.“I don't want Tink to leave,” Mike explained. The instant the words left his mouth, the goblin turned her head toward him. There was a glimmer of hope that he was afraid to shatter, so he waited for her next move.“Goblin Law say fight over home, someone leave.”Mike fought hard to avoid rolling his eyes. Clearly her head was hard literally and metaphorically. “Well, goblin law doesn't apply here. This is my house, so we follow my laws.”Tink shook her head. “Always follow Goblin Law.”“Well, then is there a law that lets us fight and you get to stay?” He felt Tink relax even more beneath his arm. Her snuffling stopped, and she became silent beneath his arms.“Fight for goblin wife,” she whispered.“Oh.” Mike was officially between a rock and a hard place with the little green monster he had found beneath the garage. If he took her as a goblin wife, then what did that entail? Then again, where would she go if she left? Naia had warned her that the world was a bad place for monsters, and it occurred to him that, as far as he knew, nobody even remotely believed goblins still existed. What if Tink was the last of her kind? What about his relationship with Naia? “Shit.”“No have to take goblin wife,” Tink whispered. “Tink can just go.”“Well, hold on.” The gears in his mind were turning. “If I take you as goblin wife, what about other people? Do we have to live down here?”“Goblin husband take many wives. Goblin wife no mind.”“Okay. Well Tink, this was a fight for a goblin wife. Now you don't have to leave.” Mike wanted to clap himself on the back, but he wanted to keep Tink pinned.“Fight for goblin wife not over,” she told him. Seeing the puzzled look on his face, she gently grabbed one of his hands and dragged it down to her breast. “Different kind of fight.”“Oh.” Mike wasn't sure what to say, but he was immediately struck at how firm the breast beneath his hand was. It was slightly bigger than his hand, and as he dragged his thumb across the top, he felt a pair of nipples, stacked vertically. He gave it a squeeze, releasing Tink's arms. She immediately grabbed him by the hair on the back of his head, pulling him close.“Tink want you to fight harder,” she hissed, pulling him in. Clawed hands dragged down her back, just hard enough to remind Mike that they were there. They found the waist band of his shorts, shoving them down. Mike grabbed her breasts tightly now, and Tink's clawed hand found Mike's cock. “Fight even harder. Make goblin wife.”Mike wrapped his hand in her hair, looping it across his knuckles so that he could yank it backward. He pulled her face in, suddenly entranced by the exotic curl of her lips, something he only saw now that her fangs weren't bared at him. Tink was working his shaft with both tiny hands, dragging her just the tips of her claws expertly across his dick. He shivered, the sensation hitting him directly in the gut.“Almost ready,” Tink muttered, licking the palms of her hand with an unusually long tongue. Mike bit down on her breast, rolling her double nipples around with his tongue. He was amazed at how large each nipple was in his mouth, and she arched her back.“Bite harder, sweaty man.”Mike chomped down, expecting a cry of protest, but he got a moan of pleasure. Her skin was dirty, but tasted mainly of the earth, and didn't yield in the slightest. Letting up, he curled three fingers and caught her double nipples between his knuckles, pinching them and pulling up. Snarling, Tink grabbed the head of his hard cock, now slippery, and placed it at the edge of her pussy.“Make me goblin wife,” she growled, and Mike obliged. He shoved his way into her, her tight pussy squeezing him the whole way in.“Holy shit!” Mike yelled, feeling hard ridges inside of Tink rub against his glans. Tink wrapped tiny legs around Mike and forced herself up to meet him, but she was so tight, he wasn't getting in any further than just the first couple inches.“Fight from bottom,” Tink begged, and Mike rolled on his back. She mounted him, forcing herself down, and Mike felt like his dick was being squeezed by a set of angry hands. She struggled, only three inches of his dick penetrating her tight folds. Mike grabbed her shoulders first, trying to push her down. The tender side of him demanded that he show some sort of gentle gesture, so he ran one hand lovingly across her brow and then back through her hair.What was this? Mike swept Tink's hair aside to reveal a horn, nearly three inches long, hidden in the wild tangles of her hair. Surprised, he searched the other side of her head, finding another, slightly shorter horn. Suddenly inspired, he clamped his hands down tight, forcing Tink onto his cock.Tink couldn't reach the root of his cock, her insides simply not large enough for him. Her tiny belly bulged outward with every thrust of his dick. Tink panted, mouth open wide, as she rode Mike hard, squeezing at his pecks with clawed hands. Her wide hips made it easy for her legs to wrap around Mike's waist, and she was lifting and dropping so quickly that Mike was tensing his stomach just to brace for impact.“Oh! Oh fuck!” Mike felt his insides churn, his balls getting ready to blast a load. Tink, sensing this, rode even harder, guttural moans and drool leaving her mouth, gasping for air as her fingers clutched Mike's biceps. Mike yanked down on her horns, squeezing tight, and Tink's grunts became a protracted growl. Mike's whole body tightened, and Tink threw herself forward, slipping free of Mike's hold, to sink her teeth into her shoulder.“Ow, you fucking-” Mike bit her back, trying to dig his own teeth into the flesh around her neck. His crotch was suddenly soaked in Tink's cum, and she screamed through her teeth. His shoulder hurt like hell, but his balls never got the message. Mike bit her even harder, filling her with three giant bursts of cum, Tink grunting as each one entered her.She released him with her teeth, leaving a thin pattern of needle-like injuries all around his shoulder. Mike let go too, leaving mostly just indentations and spit on her skin. Her pussy contracted, squeezing out another stream of goo, and Mike shuddered with pleasure. Tink laid her head down on Mike's chest, letting out a low rumble like a cat.“Tinker now goblin wife of sweaty man,” she told him, tracing her fingers along his arm.“Tinker? Is that your full name?” Tink nodded, her shining eyes on his. “Well, you can call me Mike, not sweaty man.”“Mike goblin husband. Tink belong to Mike now.” She sighed, laying her head down. Mike held her this way for a bit, letting his body relax. Even as his dick softened, her goblin cunt was still so tight that she held him in place.“Well, Tinker-”“Husband call me Tink.”“Well, Tink, I'm sure there's plenty of daylight left. I need my tools to fix the fountain.”Tink shook her head, her ears flopping lightly beneath her hair. “Tink good at fixing. Tink help, you see.” She dismounted, Mike's dick plopping free along with a giant puddle of cum. Tink squatted, lapping up the mess with her long, slippery tongue, until his cock was clean once more.“Jesus all-mighty,” Mike muttered to himself, finding his shorts. Tink was holding what was left of her dress, string at it in sadness.“Tink need new outfit,” she informed him, tossing the rags aside.“I think I have a shirt that will fit you,” he said, not wanting to waste any more time thinking about it.“Good idea. Husband get new dress, Tink go look at fountain.” She had already retrieved her goggles, fixing them in place on her head, and had grabbed a small toolbox next to the bench. “We go.”Tink followed Mike out, and they navigated the labyrinth of books until they got to the back door. The sun was past the roof of the house now, meaning it was at least four in the afternoon. In the sun's light, Tink's skin took on a pretty hue beneath all the grime, and he could now see the giant, single areola that surrounded her double nipples. Dark green pubes hid her crotch from view.Seeing where his eyes were looking, Tink became suddenly bashful. She held the toolbox up, covering her crotch with it.“Get Tink's dress,” she said, her yellow eyes looking away from him. Mike left her behind, running up the stairs to retrieve a spare t-shirt from his bag. Today had destroyed a significant chunk of his wardrobe. He needed to go shopping soon.Mike grabbed a simple black t-shirt from his bag. He didn't bother putting a new shirt on-his new scrapes and cuts were still clotting. Staring in the mirror, he just shook his head. It looked like he had fallen through a plate glass window. The bite marks on his shoulder, however, had already clotted up. He really hoped that goblin bites weren't poisonous.When he got outside, Tink was squatting, naked, inside the fountain. He was handing her his shirt when he watched a spoonful of cum dribble free from her pussy.“This nice.” Tink inspected the material before slipping it over her head. The sleeves were a little too wide, but the length was perfect. It covered Tink down to her knees. Mike joined her in the fountain, and the two of them started by scraping the mud and grime from the bottom, scooping it over the side into the bucket that he had brought home. The center of the fountain was a simple marble monolith with a single basin that would overflow into the giant basin below.Scraping up the muck and grime, Mike couldn't help but sneak glances at Tink. Her tiny body was lean and sexy in a different way than Naia's had been. However, in the light of day, it was obvious that Tink was in need of a bath, and Mike hoped that Naia would be willing to share her tub.“How long have you been hiding in the garage, Tink?” Mike asked.“Tink there for-” Tink put a clawed finger to her lips, deep in thought. “Hm. Tink not sure. Tink remember big sleep, wake up yesterday.” She shrugged.“Do you remember Emily?”Tink nodded. “Human lady. No need to fight. She let Tink live in garage.”“Wait. You didn't have to fight her, but you fought with me?”“Is goblin way. Males too aggressive, always take, never give. All males fight.”“Well, you need to remember that I'm not a goblin Tink. Do you think you can do that for me?” Tink stopped what she was doing, casting a soulful look in Mike's direction. Several seconds passed.“Tink remember.” A sly grin crossed her face as she traced a line down Mike's thigh. “Mike much bigger than a goblin.”“Oh, well, thank's, Tink.”“Not much of a biter, though.” Tink stuck her hand into a crevasse, twisting her hands and pulling free a long trail of rocky sludge. It was almost a foot long, and Mike could hear stone scraping on stone as it slid free. Tink tossed the sludge over the edge of the fountain, and Mike heard the sounds of water rushing up from beneath the earth.“We did it, Tink!” Mike high fived Tink, grabbing her around the waist. He picked her up and they jumped out of the fountain, escaping the icy cold water as it filled the basin. Tiny bubbles of energy formed, fluttering around the fountain like butterflies, and Naia surfaced, wearing a simple cloth dress over her body.“Gods, it's so good to be outside,” Naia said, eyes closed and arms wide. She took a deep breath of fresh air, opening her eyes to survey her fountain. “Let's work out some kinks, shall we?”Naia snapped her fingers, and the stone monolith shook, blasting dirt and mud free. Water rolled down its sides, filling the middle basin with fresh spring water. The remaining dirt and mud was caught in tiny tide pools, which spun them into a surface froth that was unceremoniously dumped over the side onto the concrete slab beneath the fountain.“Oh, it's like having the feeling come back to your legs after they fall asleep. Thank you so much Mike!” Naia turned to blow Mike a kiss, but froze when she saw Tink standing behind him. “Tink? Is that you?”“Naia!” Tink scrambled onto the rim of the fountain, standing eye to breast with Naia. Naia gave the goblin a tight hug.“You know Tink?” Mike asked.“Of course I do. She is in charge of keeping the house in working order. Goblins are typically quite dumb, but Tink is somehow brighter than most humans, though she may not sound like it.” Naia gave Tink an affectionate pat on the head. “I remember that she was one of the last monsters collected, still just a child when she came here. She stayed mostly in the garage, though. Her people have a weird thing about housing.”“Yeah. I ran into that. Apparently she's officially my goblin wife.” Mike winced inwardly, waiting for the emotional fallout.“Tink, is this true?” Naia asked, kneeling down in the water so the two were face to face.“We fight,” Tink declared. “Mike win goblin wife.”“I'm so happy for you!” Naia and Tink embraced again, causing Mike to shake his head. He was having one hell of a weird day.“This doesn't bother you?” Mike asked.“Of course not, silly. I have a part of your soul, remember? You don't realize this, but in a way, this is the nicest thing you could do for her.” Naia patted Tink's head affectionately. “Her kind doesn't care for goblins like her. She's very smart, which is bad enough if you're a goblin female, but she is also very ugly for her kind.”“Ugly?” Mike didn't think so, though his definition of beauty was currently in a rapid tailspin.Naia nodded. “Goblins are a weird bunch. Trust me, you would have had no reason to make a wife of any normal goblin.” Naia's nose crinkled. “Tink, you stink.”“Tink hungry too,” the goblin announced, holding her stomach. “Just finish big sleep.”“What's the big sleep?” Mike asked.“Between owners, the house has a way of hiding its denizens. I stay conscious the whole time, but the fear was that if a long enough period of time passed, some of the monsters would lose their shit and wander out into the world, lonely and looking for company. So they sleep, but I'm guessing that they are starting to wake up now that you are here.” Naia flipped her wet hair out of the way. “Tink, can I talk to Mike for a minute?”Tink nodded. “I put away tools.” She quickly gathered the cleaning supplies and vanished into the garage.“You fucked her, didn't you?” Naia asked. Mike gulped. This was the fallout he was expecting.“If I didn't, she thought she had to leave. I couldn't do that to her.” Mike explained.“It was more than that,” Naia grinned, stroking Mike's chin. “You fucked her, and you liked it.” Her hand found his cock through his shorts.“Unexpectedly, yes. I did. It was weird, but kind of hot.”“Goblin's have weird ways of looking at marriage. As it is, you could order her to march into a fire, and she would do it because you are her husband. I'm telling you this so that you know how you should be treating her, despite her willingness to please you. Prove to me that you can handle this by treating her well, because it would break my heart to discover that you can't.”“What about us?” Mike asked.“There will always be time for us. Goblins are polygamous. I could let you fuck me while she watched, and she would just be happy to be in the room.” Naia laughed. “Not that I would ever treat her that way. I think of her very much like a little sister. You should get her some food, and then have her take a bath. I promise you that you'll find something underneath all that dirt and grime that you will like.” Naia winked.“What will you be doing?” Mike asked.“I'll be out here, no worries. Take some time just the two of you.” Naia slid her hand across the bite mark on Mike's shoulder. “She's marked you, you know? Now that she's tasted your blood, she can find you anywhere.”“Goblin bites aren't poisonous, right?” Mike lowered his voice in case Tink came back.“You would know by now if they were,” she whispered back, giving him a kiss on the nose. Tink emerged from the garage, her hands now empty.“I'm going to fix us some lunch,” Mike announced, and Tink was immediately by his side. “And then I'm going to wash up. Care to join me?”“Tink come too.” Mike held the door for her and she pinched his ass as she walked by. Mike turned to Naia, but the nymph was already floating on her back, staring up into the clouds.Mike took Tink inside, where he heated up what was left of the pizza for both of them to eat. She sat across from him, gobbling down the pizza in huge bites while he got on Amazon to order a few things. He was lucky in that he was in a city with Prime Now, and he made a few purchases that he thought would come in handy, staring at Tink the whole time. Now that they were inside, he realized just how bad she smelled, but didn't want to hurt her feelings.Tink followed him upstairs, where the bath had already filled itself with hot water. Mike smiled at the silver brush that had been left on the rim of the tub by the soap and shampoo. Tink stripped off her shirt, and Mike helped her into the bath.It started innocent enough-Mike stripped off his bandages and joined her, and the two of them took turns cleaning each other. Mike used a rag to wash the dirt and grime off of Tink, discovering that her dark green skin was actually the bright green of a healthy lawn. He scrubbed her back, marveling at the prominent ridges along her spine, making him think of her as a tiny dragon instead.“Tink's turn.” Tink gently washed his around his wounds, taking particular care near the bite mark on his shoulder, which was now just a series of small scabs. She scrubbed him slowlyHer hair was the worst. Mike had Tink dunk her head, dirt and grime turning the water brown. He drained the tub and refilled it twice, helping her shampoo her long, dirty strands of hair. Once her hair was clean, he discovered that her hair was a dark auburn, with alternating streaks of red and brown throughout. While he had been willing to fuck her in the dark, the emerald creature in his tub was looking more and more feminine with every layer of dirt they scrubbed off.Tink sat in front of him, her head and shoulders above the water. Mike realized that her back was now clean, but he was having a tough time taking his hands off of her. Tink sighed, scooting back against him, her fingers lightly tracing shapes on his thighs. Mike slid his hands across the top of her shoulders, then down across her chest. His fingers squeezed her breasts as one of her hands circled his cock.He pulled Tink up onto one leg, using it as a booster seat. With her wet hair pulled to one side, she reminded him of that green girl from Guardians of the Galaxy, albeit much smaller. She growled affectionately at him, and he slid his hand down her thigh and into the dark patch of hair between her legs.“No biting this time,” he warned her, tracing circles around her crotch.“No bites,” Tink promised, her pink tongue circling her thin lips. She ran her tongue up the side of his neck, tickling at his ear. Mike circled her pussy a few times, puzzled at the shape of it. She had a double set of labia, the inner set puffy and engorged. He ran his fingers over them slowly, enjoying how the folds squeezed at his fingers. Tink shivered in the warm water, her tail splashing the surface.While Tink was enjoying herself, Mike was having difficulty finding what he was looking for. Determined, he searched her folds for any trace of a fleshy nub, hoping that his theory about goblin anatomy would prove correct. After a minute of this, he decided to explore something else, pulling her leg wide and pushing a finger inside of her.Tink let out a growl, and Mike was surprised to feel not one, but two semi hard lumps just inside her pussy. He hooked his finger, tracing figure eights around them, and Tink gyrated her hips in rhythm with his movements. It was no wonder that he had trouble fitting earlier. He could barely bend his finger once inside her, and her pussy was already squeezing his finger so tight it was uncomfortable.Mike grabbed Tink by one of her horns, tilting her head sideways so that he could kiss her neck. Tink was stroking Mike's shaft with one hand while pinching her own double-nipple with the other, her claws squeezing hard enough that Mike was worried that she would hurt herself.“This time, Mike fit,” Tink declared, leaving Mike to pull the plug. The tub drained until the water level was below their hips. Mike held onto Tink's horns as she went down on him, her long tongue wrapping around his dick, leaving behind a trail of slime that made his dick tingle. While her teeth made him nervous, her big mouth was big enough that not only did she take his cock all the way to the back, but his balls as well. Mike held tightly to her horns and moved his dick even faster, shuddering at the smooth feeling of her tongue on the base of his cock. Every time she took the entire length of him, she swallowed, her throat squeezing the head of his dick.“Tink, that feels amazing.” Mike told her. She let out a growl of pleasure, and Mike began pumping her face. Tink fingered herself while pinching her breast, and Mike was all-out face fucking her, causing her to moan every time he bottomed out in her throat.“Fuck,” he muttered, feeling the pressure build. Tink wrapped her tongue around his balls, staving off his orgasm. She opened her mouth wide, and Mike realized that he was so far down her throat that the head of his dick was still stuck in place. Tink swallowed several times, squeezing him. Her wide, innocent eyes looked up at him lovingly, but her long tongue squeezed even harder, trapping his orgasm. She slapped at his hands, and he let go of her horns. Pulling her head back, Mike popped out of the back of her throat.“Not yet,” she chastised him, scooting her hips forward. Mike lifted her by the hips, setting her down on his cock. Her tail swished back and forth, and Mike almost came at the sheer heat of her tight walls. Tink growled at him, trying to force herself down the length of his cock again.“Tink, it's okay,” Mike told her, but she was having none of it. She turned around, facing away from him. Her ass was like a giant peach from this position, a heart shaped fruit ripe for the plucking. Tink grunted in frustration again, trying to force Mike's length all the way into her body.“This time, Mike fit,” she growled, slamming into him with long thrusts. She always came up a couple inches short.“Tink, I'm going to come soon,” Mike informed her. The pool of water left behind in the tub bubbled, sending tiny spheres of water into the air.“Not if I can help it,” Naia said, a hand, made of water wrapping around the base of his cock, once again cutting off his orgasm. She emerged from the water, her dress plastered against her body. Tink was panting, fighting off an orgasm of her own.“Naia!” Mike said, shocked to see her. Naia snapped her fingers, the dress on her body vanishing. She put both hands on Tink's shoulders and gave her a hard push. Mike moaned, his balls aching as he slid in almost half an inch more.“That's right, lover.” Naia gave Tink another push, but she simply couldn't go any further. “Is it really that important that he fit inside of you?” Naia asked Tink.Tink nodded, unable to speak.“Then there's only one choice.” Naia pulled Tink off of Mike's cock, maneuvering her onto her hands and knees. Mike's cock was covered in Tink's creamy fluids, his dick covered in his own precum also. Leaning over Tink's body, Naia grabbed her tail and lifted it. Mike was treated to the vision of Tink's puckered asshole, dark green and coated in her juices. “I can guarantee that he will fit in here.”Mike felt a sudden surge from within, his heart beating in excitement. Naia held Tink's tail up, and Mike positioned the head of his cock at her ass. Tink gasped when Mike pushed himself in, her fluids providing plenty of lubrication. Just as the head of his cock penetrated her, Tink wiggled her ass back and forth, forcing herself back.“Make…Mike…fit…” she declared, working her way steadily down. Somehow, her asshole was even tighter than her pussy, and Mike could feel Tink's pulse against his own. He only made it halfway in when he couldn't go any further. Tink let out a frustrated moan.“Don't worry dear, big sister Naia will help.” A mischievous grin on her face, Naia drew a pattern in the water with her finger. The water sprouted finger-like tendrils which began tickling Tink's pussy. Her breathe as coming in ragged gasps as her hips lurched back and forth. Tink growled, then moaned, then growled as Mike's dick worked its way in even further.“Oh god,” Mike moaned, the water gripping him even tighter. He grunted, pulling his dick out and then pushing it back in, trying to get his balls to touch her green flesh with every push.“You need to pay it forward, little sister,” Naia informed Tink. Grabbing onto Tink's horns, Naia pulled Tink's head between her legs. Tink greedily lapped at Naia's bald folds, Naia's body hovering above the water's surface. “Yes, that's a good little goblin.”“That doesn't seem like little sister behavior,” Mike muttered.“Nymphs don't follow conventional family rules,” Naia replied, sighing in pleasure.“Uh,” Tink added, stopping frequently as the water fingers penetrated her. Mike shuddered, the sensation of the fingers traveling through the thin wall between Tink's pussy and ass setting him over the edge. He was certain Naia was working magic on Tink, because the goblin was letting out tiny shrieks every few seconds now, her body tensing up and relaxing.“Nobody cums until Mike bottoms out,” Naia declared. Frantic, Tink was pushing herself backward as hard as she could. Naia handed Tink's tail to Mike. “Make sure you pull it by the base,” Naia informed him. One hand on Tink's hip, the other on her tail, he began pulling with all his might, every thrust getting him even closer. He wrapped a hand around Tink's stomach, feeling the bulge of his dick moving beneath the skin of her stomach.“Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Fuuuck!” Mike felt Tink tighten down, then relax. His dick slid the rest of the way in, his balls slamming against her asscheeks. She tightened up once he was all the way in, grunting into Naia's pussy. He fucked Tink's ass with very tiny thrusts, unable to move much farther, and Naia winked at him, touching the water with her finger. The pressure around the base of his balls vanished, and he felt several waves of energy build up simultaneously. Tink came, spraying a milky fluid into the water, and Mike filled her ass, cumming again and again, his stomach aching from the number of times he tensed up. Mike let out a growl of his own, Tink collapsing face first into Naia, who turned her head sideways in her lap. Large tears were running down her face, and Mike worried that she was hurt.Naia held up a hand to stop him from moving her. “They're happy tears, Mike. Let her have this moment,” she whispered. Mike rubbed the base of Tink's back, running his hands over her bubble shaped butt in lazy circles. Much like before, Mike started to go soft, but still couldn't slide free. He grabbed Tink's shoulders, pulling her up into a sitting position. She let out little whimpers as he pulled himself free, cradling her in his arms.“God, that was so fucking hot!” Naia declared, the faucet turning on. The tub filled up, and Tink slid away from him, facing Mike.“Tink know you make great goblin husband,” she told him. Naia picked up the brush from the side of the tub, and Mike gave Tink a kiss on the forehead as Naia began working the brush through Tink's tangled hairs.“Tink is a great goblin wife,” Mike declared, smiling at the monsters in his tub.Romancing the StoneMike yawned, the morning light through the white curtains casting a blissful glow on the room. He scratched the back of his neck, his foot kicking the lump near the bottom of his bed. He sat up, leaning forward to give the lump a playful pat.“It's time to get up, Tink.” Mike watched the lump slide to the edge of the bed, disappearing over the edge with a thud.“Owie,” Tink muttered, standing up holding her bottom. She was wearing a tank top night shirt, one of the things Mike had ordered through Amazon, as a full dress. She wore her orange goggles too, refusing to part with them, even at night.“How did you sleep?” Mike asked, sliding out of bed in just his boxers.Tink responded with a yawn, her wide mouth revealing dozens of needle sharp teeth. “Tink sleep extra heavy. Mike hog bed.”“I did not hog the bed,” he muttered. After the threesome in the bath, Naia had spent a solid hour brushing Tink's hair out, and then braiding it tightly against Tink's head, starting at the base of her horns and running behind her ears. Mike eventually wandered out his front door (with a wary glance at the swing) to retrieve the Amazon packages he had ordered; some replacement shirts for himself, and some clothes he thought Tink would like. Tink had cried when he showed her the shirts he had bought -they all fit her like little dresses, albeit the fit was odd. Naia informed Mike that Tink's skills extended to sewing as well, and that the goblin would likely alter the material later for a better fit.“Mike hog bed, too much roll over. Goblin husband have bad dreams.” Tink beat him to the bathroom, closing the door behind her. She wasn't wrong-Mike, despite ending the night on the best note of his life, had suffered through the standard reoccurring dreams again. He stared at the scar tissue on his hip, pondering why his brain insisted on living through the worst moments of his life in dream form, his broken mother shrieking at him from the past.“You okay?” Naia's voice drifted up from the tub. “I'm getting a vibe off of you.”“Just some old memories, I'm okay.” Tink flushed the toilet, but the door remained shut. Wondering what was taking so long, Mike opened the door.The goblin stared at the water swirling in the bowl, her goggles pulled down over her eyes. Mike didn't dare investigate any farther, preferring to wait.“Bad pipe,” Tink declared. “Water not fast enough. Bad pipe.” She looked at Mike, her eyes magnified through her goggles. “Tink can fix, but need some parts.”“How can you tell?” Mike asked. The toilet seemed slow, but the house was old.“Tink know.” She tapped her goggles. “Tink good at fix, but goggles good at seeing what need fix. Tell Tink big water leak come soon.”“Shit. Is it safe to use again?”“For now, is safe.” Tink strolled out of the bathroom, giving Mike's butt a slap. “Need fix in couple days, or big mess. Tink look in basement today, check where pipes go.” Her stomach growled. “Tink go after breakfast.”“Yeah, I'll make us something.” Mike excused himself, peeing in the toilet. The tiny scratches on his arms and legs looked bad, but didn't hurt any longer, which was a good sign. He walked out of the bathroom, staring into the tub. “Is it weird that I'm just sort of accepting this? The last twenty four hours have been out of my depth.”“It's what makes you a good fit,” Naia's voice informed him. “You can handle all of this because it isn't normal. When you got into a fight with Tink, you thought outside the box to make sure she stayed, even if it meant fucking a goblin. I know you did it partially for me, but you did it partially for the house without realizing it. It works through you, much as it does through me. If you had encountered a horny, human woman down there who wanted to suck your dick, you would have suffered a panic attack and come running inside.”Mike thought about this for a second. Naia was right. Somehow, the sheer lunacy of this whole situation wasn't even registering on his panic meter. “Did my Great Aunt handle it as well as me?”“In some aspects, yes,” Naia replied. “She accepted things quickly, but she didn't take your unique approach to tackling problems.” Naia's tub echoed with her laugh. “At least, not right away. We spent plenty of nights together in the tub, just the two of us.”“Gonna be honest, not sure how to take that news right now.” Mike pulled a shirt over his head. “I'll see you later.”“Stop out in the garden,” Naia told him. “I would love the company.”“Can do.” Mike left his room, walking silently down the long hall. He pondered every closed door he walked past, seeing each as an inevitable trap. What was hiding here, behind these quiet doors? Eventually, he would open them all, checking each room for another Tink, or even a Cecilia.To be continued.By writerannabelle for Literotica
CW: Sexual Assault - Our discussion of Werewolf Island contains brief mention of rape/sexual assault scenes portrayed in the film. If you prefer to avoid this topic of conversation, it starts at 01:00:31 and ends at 01:03:01. Recorded October 10, 2021 | Edited by Dylan It's Halloween, so it's time to get spooky! And what's spookier than wasting six hours of our lives? Time is fleeting and death comes for us all! OOOOOoooooOOo! We tag in OG Bargain Fella Dylan (no, not that Dylan) to tackle four microbudget werewolf features courtesy of Wild Eye Entertainment. From the found footage thrills of Wolf House and Cold Ground, to the horror-comedy chills of The Snarling, to the spills of Werewolf Island, Bargain Binge covers it all. Trick or treat? Smell my feet? Give me something good to eat? All this and more on Bargain Binge - the last bastion of physical media and your wallet! Find Bargain Binge on the internet here: Website: bargainbingepod.com Email: bargainbingepod@gmail.com Twitter: @BargainBingePod Instagram: @BargainBingePod Clips & Bonus Videos: YouTube T-Shirts & More: shop.bargainbingepod.com Stickers: PayPal
Wolf 359 likes to snarl. The star produces huge outbursts of energy. That could be a problem for life on any planets that orbit the star. Wolf 359 is one of our closest neighbors — less than eight light-years away. Only a few star systems are closer. Other than those big outbursts, the star is amazingly meek. It's less than one-tenth as massive as the Sun, and just one-tenth of one percent as bright. But Wolf 359 generates a powerful magnetic field. Lines of magnetic force can tangle, then snap. That produces a flare — a powerful outburst of X-rays and gamma rays. A recent study says the star probably produces outbursts as strong as anything ever seen from the Sun several times a day. And once a month or so, it can produce an outburst up to a hundred times stronger: a super-flare. Astronomers have found evidence of two planets orbiting the star. Neither is likely to be a home for life. But if there are planets in the right location for life, the flares could be a problem. They could heat up and erode some of a planet's atmosphere, and deliver a good jolt of energy to the surface. A planet might be able to handle the flares. But the flares wouldn't make it any easier for life around this tiny star. Wolf 359 is in Leo, which is high in the eastern sky at dawn. The star is well below Regulus, the lion's bright heart. But despite all the snarling, you need a telescope to see this close neighbor. Script by Damond Benningfield Support McDonald Observatory
Evergreen Park Mayor Kelly Burke joins Steve Bertrand on Chicago’s Afternoon News to explain why freight trains are becoming a nuisance for drivers and causing safety concerns for pedestrians. Follow Your Favorite Chicago’s Afternoon News Personalities on Twitter:Follow @SteveBertrand Follow @kpowell720 Follow @maryvandeveldeFollow @LaurenLapka
It Injured our Dog. The Woodmill Hairy Thing. - Witness Report: Ok Im going to tell you a story thats true, it happened to my ex partner and my son a years ago. My son has never put it out there publicly what happened nor has my ex partner, and I was not there that night when they saw it but this is what they told me when they came back home. My ex partner was the security guard for the Golf course on Woodmill lane in Southampton. He was on his usual shift that night, not too much happend down there so my son had joined him at work for night and they also had our two security trained dogs with them (both dogs will attack on command) Something in the bushes they can not describe made a horrid howling screech and set off running towards the wood line, the dogs strained so hard my ex partner dropped the leads and the dogs were off in hot pursuit of this thing.
Israel’s latest Gaza conflict lasted eleven brutal days but tragically, there’s no sign it’ll be the last. Israel’s citizens endured a pace and ferocity of Hamas rockets unprecedented in the four conflicts dating back to 2008. Yet over 90% of the 4,200 murderous missiles were shot out of the sky by the Iron Dome radar defence system. It’s also been horrifying for the Jewish diaspora, facing hordes of thugs loudhailing murderous intimidation at Jewish people from their cars and fighting on the streets of Europe and North America. And Israel’s war was fought on both sides of its border with Gaza. Today’s episode is a detailed briefing by both the IDF and Israeli police. Support Jonny Gould’s Jewish State: Paypal: https://www.paypal.me/JonathanLGould Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/jonnygould?fan_landing=true Kofi: https://ko-fi.com/jonnygould Find Jonny on Social Media: https://twitter.com/jonnygould https://www.facebook.com/jonnygouldshow https://www.instagram.com/jonnygould Israel’s disengagement and withdrawal from Gaza in 2005 was a unilateral dismantling of 21 towns with complete evacuation of Israeli citizens and the IDF. This latest round of the conflict had quite a different feel. A more urgent one felt worldwide. Snarling antisemitism’s been ramped up and agitated by convoys of cars draped with Palestinian flags driving, hooting and loudhailing calls for murder and rape of children through Jewish areas of London A police officer was caught siding with protestors even as they were confronted and attacked by those who also made up the same protest. And football’s authorities looked on as Wembley’s prestigious FA Cup Final witnessed players showing off a Palestinian flag at the same time as the Met contained violence in the West End. And because that wasn’t called out, the same happened at Manchester United as a small post-pandemic crowd handed World Cup winner Paul Pogba the same flag to show the Premier League’s worldwide viewers the state of English football. Blue tick influencers cheer-led the terror giving it a sheen of legitimacy and respectability. Clashes happened inside Israeli cities between Jews and Arabs. Disturbances and demonstrations with the added shock of a synagogue burned down by rioters in Lod - not Łódź. This was a whole new challenge to the IDF, Shabak (or Shin Bet homeland security) and of course, the Israel Police. Gaza’s indiscriminate rockets, designed to destroy Israel’s Jews also actually killed Muslim Arabs, a Hindu carer for the elderly and rural agricultural workers from Thailand. Israel is bracing itself post-ceasefire for the stash of Hamas and Islamic Jihad’ rockets and mortars unspent. There are many, many thousands left.
Thank you for joining us for our Daily Devotional from Psalm 59:14-17. If you live in the Dunstable area and would like to make contact with us we would love to hear from you. Why not use this link- http://ccd.church/visitor Find out more: Facebook – Christ Church Dunstable Instagram – Christ Church Dunstable Twitter - @CC_Dunstable
Jaz and Vela descend into the Lower Heights for a routine house call. But more than one surprise is waiting among the glistening gold and soft firelight of the looming mansion… Get early access to the full season at HTTP://patreon.com/7thvalkyrie!
Jaz and Vela descend into the Lower Heights for a routine house call. But more than one surprise is waiting among the glistening gold and soft firelight of the looming mansion… Get early access to the full season at HTTP://patreon.com/7thvalkyrie!
Hallucinogen - Snarling Black Mabel (LOUD & Domestic Remix) Loud Remixes Vol 2 - Iboga Records http://musicshop.iboga.dk/store/view_release?release=1581 IBOGADIGITAL663 1. LOUD - Tales from the Loudmobile (Ido Ophir Remix) 2. LOUD - The Edge (Uriah Klapter & AckerMan Remix) 3. LOUD - Wired (A Balter Remix) 4. LOUD, Shulman - If (Allaby Remix) 5. LOUD - Loose Senses (Perfect Stranger Pac Man Remix) 6. LOUD - 5 Billion Stars (Captain Hook Remix) 7. LOUD - Africa 101 (Easy Riders Remix) 8. LOUD - Peace Pipe (Dekel Remix) 9. LOUD - Dr Who (Gorovich Remix) 10. LOUD - Solid (Atmos Remix) 11. LOUD - Station 42 (Zen Mechanics Remix) 12. LOUD - Green Star Movement (Astrix & Loud Remix) 13. Infected Mushroom - Neverland (LOUD Remix) 14. Hallucinogen - Snarling Black Mabel (LOUD & Domestic Remix) 15. LOUD - Perpetuum Mobile (Eat Static Remix) 16. LOUD - Subinya (Ott Remix) 17. LOUD, Shulman - If (Gorovich Remix) 18. LOUD, Shulman - Tales from the Loudmobile (Gorovich Remix) 19. LOUD - Small Talk (Gorovich Remix) 20. LOUD - Sun Dance (Gorovich Remix) 21. LOUD - Subinya (Gorovich Remix) 22. LOUD - Station 42 (Gorovich Remix) 23. LOUD - Shores of Titan (Gorovich Remix) A fresh batch of LOUD remixes land on Iboga, featuring A Balter, Ackerman, Allaby, Astrix, Atmos, Captain Hook, Dekel, Domestic, Easy Riders, Eat Static, Gorovich, Hallucinogen, Ido Ophir, Infected Mushroom, Ott, Perfect Stranger, Uriah Klapter and Zen Mechanics. The first half of the album features psytrance, progressive and techno infusions, while the last 7 tracks lead us into dub territory with a selection of remixes from Gorovich. Simon Posford 2020 Iboga Records Copyright Control
Conor Tallon speaks to Michael Waldron about this weeks featured Work of The Week from the Crawford Art Gallery...Strike up the band! This WORK OF THE WEEK is a real winter warmer.Soon, up Aloft, the Silver, Snarling Trumpets 'gan to Chide (c.1923) by Harry Clarke gives us the best seat in the house, as we are placed front and centre before the artist's strange septet or musical ensemble.This watercolour study is dominated by the dramatic figure of the conductor of this not-quite orchestra. Rather than remaining faithful to his poetic source – “The Eve of St Agnes” (1819) by John Keats, in which angelic decorations are described ‘with hair blown back' – Clarke has instead incorporated the image into the conductor's appearance.Occupying a gallery space, the musical ensemble contributes to the Eve of St Agnes festivities, which are detailed in an associated watercolour study. Each figure has its own personality sketched out and evoked by the artist.Nicola Gordon-Bowe (1948-2018), the late great Clarke scholar, has suggested a source for the theorbo (long-necked lute) or sitar-playing figure to the right of the conductor: his balding head and pointed ears resemble the vampiric Count Orlok from F.W. Murnau's contemporaneous silent film Nosferatu (1922)!Harry Clarke (1889-1931), one or Ireland's most renowned illustrators and stained-glass artists, loved literature and music. At the time of making this watercolour study in 1923, he attended a Franz Liszt recital given by Tilly Fleischmann at the Abbey Theatre.Find out this and more in our new online exhibition HARRY CLARKE MARGINALIA, which runs until 14 February 2021. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Franz Liszt (photo) is highlighted because he is the centerpiece of one of several "Can You Imagine That?" stories as he is the cause of two women deciding to duel one another... but their weapons were rather unique! Funeral Fires, Bone Fires, Bonfires... Snarling dogs, catching one's foot in a mink trap "SNAP!" This and more stories introduced and dramatized with host Lindsay MacHarrie... who also wrote and produced this mix of "Ripley's Believe It or Not" and "Information Please"... entertaining and fun to listen to. This file lives in the playlist "Can You Imagine That?"... Can you imagine that?
31 Days of Horror returns in this bonus episode featuring week 2 of the Invaders journey in which they watched 31 horror movies that they have never seen before, one for each day of the month of October. How will they fair? Tune in to find out. Jason's Picks: 9. The Last Horror Movie (2003), 10. Tremors: A Cold Day in Hell (2018), 11. The Babysitter: Killer Queen (2020), 12. Berberian Sound Studio (2012), 13. Monstrum (2018), 14. Mayhem (2017), 15. Underwater (2020), 16. Horror Island (1941) Jeff Omega's Picks: 9. The Devil Commands (1941), 10. Return of Dracula (1958), 11. The Vampire (1957), 12. Deathmaster (1972), 13. WHUF Halloween Special (2013), 14. Scare Me (2020), 15. The Most Dangerous Game (1932), 16. Manhunter (1986) Trish's Picks: 9. Night of the Demons (2009), 10. Island Zero (2018), 11. Hoax (2019), 12. WNUF Halloween Special (2013), 13. Scare Me (2020), 14. One Dark Night (1982), 15. Deep Blue Sea 3 (2020), 16. The Mortuary Collection (2019) Sam's Picks: 9. Even Lambs Have Teeth (2015), 10. Artik (2019), 11. The Ice Cream Truck (2017), 12. Creep Van (2012), 13. The 5th Floor (1978), 14. Moebius (2013), 15. The Snarling (2018), 16. Psychophonia (2017) Support independent podcasts like ours by telling your friends and family how to find us at places like Apple Podcasts, iTunes, Spotify, Google Play Music, Stitcher, PlayerFM, Tune In Radio, RadioPublic, BluBrry, Libsyn, YouTube, iHeartRadio and all the best podcast providers. Spread the love! Like, share and subscribe! You can also help out the show with a positive review and a 5-star rating over on iTunes. We want to hear from you and your opinions will help shape the future of the show. Your ratings and reviews also help others find the show. Their "earballs" will thank you. Follow us on Twitter: @InvasionRemake Like and share us on Facebook & Instagram: Invasion of the Remake Email us your questions, suggestions, corrections, challenges and comments: invasionoftheremake@gmail.com Buy a cool t-shirt, PPE masks and other Invasion of the Remake swag at our TeePublic Store!
Four fun urban MYTHS and The Belle Isle Power Plant from Jamie’s hometown, Oklahoma City!
What do you think would be the most horrorfying, seeing what's stalking you, or just hearing it. It's one thing to see what predator is after you, whether that be a beast or a being of some kind, but to be herded by something unseen, that walks as you walk and stops when you stop, or shadows you until you leave the wood is something else indeed. You hear ‘It's’ growls, snarls and footfalls. You hear the brush move as it approaches and sometimes retreats, only to approach again. What does that feel like? And what if you are at home tucked up in bed or on the sofa relaxing and you hear a growl from close to the window or even worse, inside the very room you are in. What would you do? Tonight's personal encounters include people who have been through these very situations and made it out the other side.
Let’s dive into session 17, episode 32, which features a great combat, a great bunch of open door choices and…
Welcome to Chessy Hour, the Weekly Chelsea focused podcast, under the #TouchlineFracas banner. The cast for this episode is: Yas - @McLynnYJ Joe - @ManLykJoe_ Dami - @CFCDami Follow us on twitter - @ChessyHour and @TouchlineFracas Use the hashtag #TouchlineFracas and get involved in the discussion!
Tat Club Reviews fresh horror offerings
Chris and Noah catch up on recent happenings and discuss a number of topics. Some highlights are: Keenan Cornelius marketing with a jiu-jitsu eBook, the goal of a good coach, developing a jiu-jitsu game, funneling while rolling, what it means to go 100%, and the best moment in the Matrix. Noah shares a recent story of a white belt snarling to finish a lapel choke that was across Noah's mouth, which leads Chris to make some interesting, and rather obvious and hilarious, observations about snarling and its place on the mats. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/bjj-and-brews/support
Dennis Prager talks to Heather Mac Donald, contributing editor for City Journal, about the protest at her talk at Colgate University.
Support Topic Lords on Patreon and get episodes a week early! (https://www.patreon.com/topiclords) Lords: * Laura Michet makes both indie games and huge megacorp games and just published a short story in Realms of Runeterra. https://leagueoflegends.fandom.com/wiki/RealmsofRuneterra * Xalavier Nelson, Jr. is a freelance narrative director, currently making An Airport for Aliens Currently Run by Dogs. https://www.patreon.com/StrangeScaffold Topics: * 5:10 Moth Man. Discuss. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mothman * The Leatherman, 10-fingered vagabond. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leatherman(vagabond) * The Kelly-Hopkinsville encounter. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelly%E2%80%93Hopkinsvilleencounter * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TheMothmanProphecies(film) * Owls that look like aliens. https://twitter.com/MariettaDaviz/status/1195194263866429441?s=20 * Storytelling, with Odds Bodkin. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rISdBiNhzb0&list=PLR1edeZ72f3yI53wj3WOxSNwlS1Y-b * 18:19 Why aren’t there more types of chair in common use? We have so many chair types in global society and we use basically only Couch and Regular Chair chairs in public. * 26:03 Peeing a thimbleful while pregnant, and other shop talk. * 30:33 Are you more likely to trust any given dog or any given cat? * 36:54 Would it actually be any fun to be an animal? * 45:00 Advantages and disadvantages of different book bindings. Microtopics: * Making an igloo out of rigid body, shadow casting boarding passes. * Cryptids appealing to adult males 18-35. * Cryptids losing their cryptid status when they turn out to be real. * Keeping your fingers because you are wise and have a cave. * Wikipedia pages that really ought to put the subject's finger count front and center. * Confusing Odds Bodkin with Odd Bodkins. * Booking your favorite banjo-playing grandpa to play at your game development megacorp. * Taking a bullet for a friend you wouldn't go to a concert with. * Becoming increasingly annoyed with Richard Gere and his relationship with the moth man. * Distinguishing thrones from non-thrones. * Snarling like an evil prince with your leg over the arm of your throne. * Whether there are more cats indoors or outdoors, especially in El Paso Texas. * Legal prohibition of attempting to disperse a large enough group of cats. * Convincing the judge that your rocking chair was not intended to disperse the cats. * Cat sovereignty. * Rampaging cat unions recognized by the UN. * Reagan sending in cat scabs to replace rampaging cat unions. * Being terrified of military veterans returning home and taking our jobs. * A Jim Stormdancer-shaped hole that an Air Force veteran is destined to fill. * The agent of the greater space, the arch-demon, the plane itself, the car itself, the boat itself. * The rage of seeing a teaspoon of any liquid. * Recording a conversation so you can decide later whether it's ethical to listen to it. * Immediately going to murder. * Trusting a dog to be your accountant. * A dog being much more likely than a cat to be helpful but also being more likely to maim you. * Being a jester for a cat's pleasure. * Being hyper aware of the dark side of dogdom. * Dogs representing in joy in a complicated world. * Needing permission to pee. * Cats not wanting to move to Hollywood. * Cats that are cognizant of a better world they can no longer have. * An animal with a sense of hubris, entropy and regret. * A larger squirrel being mean to you. * Getting the horny disease once a season. * Getting all your horny out of the way at once, like Spock. * Spraying eggs everywhere and not taking up anyone else's time. * When the page curves because the other pages are in the way and the image on the page is annoyingly distorted. * The stigma against the paperback being an act of class warfare. * Wanting the physical trophy of the book on your shelf as much as the experience of reading it. * Appreciating the people who have previously read the same copy of the book you have. * Renting Final Fantasy II from Blockbuster and appreciating the previous player's save file. * Being too mature for fart jokes and then being mature enough to enjoy fart jokes again. * Having to make a noise every time you get out of a chair.
Snarling Condescending Elitism vs Grubby Populism: Bernie or Bust is clearly in the latter camp https://medium.com/@allenkithowell/snarling-condescending-elitism-vs-grubby-populism-bernie-or-bust-is-clearly-in-the-latter-camp-9bda89deaf61 --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/allen-c-howell/support
Come and join us for another dive into the world of tabletop gaming with us as part of The Weekender. Make sure to delve in and tell us what you think in the comments below as we always love hearing what you have to say. We'll join you in the comments I'm sure! A quick reminder that next Monday kicks off Firelock Games Week! We'll be talking Blood & Plunder, Blood & Valor and more from the team in the US. Fog & Friction We're taking a peek at Fog & Friction which has been picked up by Warcradle Studios and offers a card game-based look at battle during World War II. Warren and Gerry have had a bit of fun with this one and it would be nice to know if this appeals to not just historical fans but also those who like their tactical card games. News Come and delve into some of the news from this week... Guardians Of The Galaxy - This band of miscreants and The Black Order get previewed Mephiston Returns - The Chief Librarian makes his way to the tabletop for Warhammer 40,000 New Elves - The folks at Wargames Atlantic are showing off their new plastic kits Goblin Wolf Riders - Snarling beasts and their cruel riders are coming next year for Oathmark Uncharted Empires - Get playing Kings Of War with all sorts of new armies and themes from Mantic Undaunted - North Africa is the new theatre that Osprey are focusing on for next year Make sure to tell us what you make of the news and if this is truly a golden age for Fantasy wargamers. Flames Of War D-Day Campaign After their battle which you can see played out HERE, Gerry and Chris from Battlefront Miniatures sat down to talk more about the Flames Of War D-Day Campaign which is moving towards Phase Five next week. Things have been going in interesting ways and we can't wait to see more people dropping their battle reports into the mix. Kickstarter What do you make of this couple of Kickstarter projects? Clash Of Spears - Gerry is excited about this fantastic Ancients game! Sci-Fi Heroes & Villains - FLASH! What do you make of these projects and will you be diving into Clash Of Spears when it releases? Have a great weekend!
Night of the Living Podcast: Horror, Sci-Fi and Fantasy Film Discussion
We kick off our May Flowers series of podcasts with a discussion of the 1963 adaptation of John Wyndham's novel The Day of the Triffids. Amy reviews The Snarling for Straight-to-Video Russian Roulette. Brought to you ad free by the Legion of Demons at patreon.com/notlp. Join the Legion to get more stuff at patreon.com/notlp! Our Beelzebub tier producers are: Mandi Arthur Jim Bolding Brandon Boone Cassie & Jeremy Burmeister Bill Fahrner Blake Heath Amanda James Alise Kombrinck Jeff Lancaster Tree & Alex McNulty Ernest Perez Mark Watts Additional financial contributions by Amy & Freddy Morris “Monster Movies (with My Friends)” was written and performed by Kelley Kombrinck. It was recorded and mixed by Freddy Morris. Night of the Living Podcast’s chief contributors are: Mikey B Andy Hung Kelley Kombrinck Amy Morris Freddy Morris The podcast is produced and engineered by Amy & Freddy Morris. Night is the Living Podcast Social Media: facebook.com/notlp twitter.com/notlp instagram.com/nightofthelivingpodcast youtube.com/notlpcrew Connect with other listeners in the Facebook Group or on Reddit: https://www.facebook.com/groups/notlp https://www.reddit.com/r/NOTLPodcast
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Man tells police that playing basketball naked enhances his skills. Comedy club audience member calls 911 over a joke. Snarling woman found at Burger King pulls 7 syringes from her vagina. Show your SUPPORT by donating to the Weird AF News Patreon where you'll get bonus episodes and you'll get to hang out with the host Jonesy! http://patreon.com/weirdafnews Also check out my sponsor The Pop Culture Antique Museum Online Store: http://freaksgeeksandgamers.com -WATCH Weird AF News on Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/weirdafnews and FOLLOW Jonesy at http://instagram.com/funnyjones or http://twitter.com/funnyjones or http://facebook.com/comedianjonesy or http://Jonesy.com
A lot of people's gods don't like gay people. It's strange to think of an omnipotent deity concerned with where you like to put your tongues and hands and gonads. Seems like there'd be bigger fish to fry. But sure enough, a lot of people's personal gods just find it abhorrent to lay with another of your own gender. For those looking to make the change for gay to not gay, helpful people provide camps where you can go to rid yourself of the compulsion to do naughty things with naughty parts that look like your naughty parts. And I assume they're all happy places, right? Because people are getting closer to god? Or does it not generally work out that way? Well, you can find out in Boy Erased! I'm joined by my wife, Tiffany B, to discuss the film, and by necessity religion in general. It's a real positive discussion, honest. Listen and love!
Godzilla (1954) Joining me on this episode is none other than Liam Jones. You can find Liam on Twitter @LiamMJones1994 and on Instagram. A fire-breathing behemoth terrorizes Japan after an atomic bomb awakens it from its centuries-old sleep. Release date: 14 October 2005 (United Kingdom) Director: Ishirō Honda Box office: ¥183 million; (US$1.6 million) Budget: 175,000 USD Music composed by: Akira Ifukube On What The Wookie Watched I solo review: The Monster (2016) DVD & Digital 8th October The Snarling (2018) The release date for The Snarling has changed to 29 October for DVD and remains 5 November for VOD. House of Salem (2016) on DVD & Digital 1st October Don't forget to subscribe on SoundCloud and on ITunes and leave us a 5 star review. You can also find me @THEUNDEADWOOKIE on Twitter, @TheUndeadWookie1980 on Instagram or on The Undead Wookie Facebook page.
Ken's Last Ever Radio Extravaganza - "One Step Closer" - Show #335, from Sept. 28, 2004 [Corporate propaganda, TV, bears: noise. Full source playlist] Emergency Alert System - "Required Weekly Test" Exxon - "Energy For a Strong America" - Commercials from the 80's [For the children on the way, it'll be their world someday. One step closer at the end of every day. Here at Exxon, we pursue a long-range plan.] Lone Star Radio Network - "Tire Pressure" - Texas Clean Air Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "Breathing Polluted Air" - Texas Clean Air Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "Top 10 Air Pollution Tips" - Texas Clean Air Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "Vehicle Maintenance" - Texas Clean Air Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "R-Rated Movies and Substance Abuse" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Commercials - "General Electric commercial" - Commercials from the 80's [GE: We bring good things to life] Lone Star Radio Network - "Long-term Marijuana Use" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "Marijuana and Your Children" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "60,000 Reasons" - On the Road in Texas Lone Star Radio Network - "Speed Use Among Women" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Commercials - "New Coke commercial with Bill Cosby" - Commercials from the 80's Lone Star Radio Network - "The New Face of PCP" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Commercials - "American Airlines commercial" - Commercials from the 80's [We're American Airlines: Doing what we do best.] Commercials - "American Airlines corporate theme" - Commercials from the 80's Lone Star Radio Network - "Roadside Breakdowns" - On the Road in Texas Commercials - "The promise of Florida" Lone Star Radio Network - "Turn Signals" - On the Road in Texas Stuart Crombie & Dennis Berry - "Bargains Galore" - Production Music - Music for TV Dinners - The '50s Ken - "Identification" Catholic Homily - "Catholic Homily for Tuesday 9/28/2004" Robert Zemeckis, director, writer; Bob Gale, writer; Michael J. Fox, Crispen Glover, actors - "Marty! Hey, George, you weren't at school today" - Back to the Future Complete Soundtrack (film excerpts) Robert Zemeckis, director, writer; Bob Gale, writer; Christopher Lloyd, actor - "1.21 Gigawatts" - Back to the Future Complete Soundtrack (film excerpts) [How could I be so careless?] Catholic Homily - "Catholic Homily for Monday 9/27/2004" Big City Orchestra - "Yank" - Chimpy [George W. Bush: "I asked him, why Yank? He said he didn't have enough time to explain."] Game Shows - "Wheel of Fotune, Trivia Trap, Scrabble, Second Chance, Wordplay, Trump Card, TTTT 1990, Strike It Rich" - Game Shows from the 80's Stormy Sacks - "The New Hollywood Squares" - Game Shows from the 80's News Themes - "Various" - Local TV News Themes from the 80's Jack Beaver - "Workaday World" - Production Music - Music for TV Dinners - The '50s Sound effects - "Bear Eating Moan Growl 1" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear, Eating; Wet Chewing; Breathing; Room Tone" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Snore; Exhale; Breaths" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Faster Panting; Varies" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Groaning Growls Growls" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Angry; Moaning Growls" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Black Bear, Sniffing; Licking, Light Groans" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Groaning and Moaning; Growls" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Growls" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Large Black Bear, Foraging and Snarling" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Large Black Bear, Single Breath" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Black Bear, Heavy Licking; Close Perspective" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Large Black Bear, Single Roar" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Panda Cub; Mewing; Movement" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Black Bear, Moan and Roar" - 49 Bears Monty Python - "I'm So Worried" - The Final Rip Off [with Terry Jones] The Rolling Stones - "She's a Rainbow" - Their Satanic Majesties Request [Looping and layering of 7 excerpts and one reversed excerpt; listen to Terminal Sunshine (Like a Rainbow Canon) for much more] The Emotions - "The Best of My Love" - Boogie Nights s.t. Steve Roden - "Crop Circles" - Crop Circles [Field recording] Ken - "I don't know if it matters" Walt Disney - "Main Street Electrical Parade" - The Music of Disney - A Legacy in Song [A bunch of copies] Ken - "If you think it is" Joe Harnell - "Graveyard Farewell (Pilot)" - The Incredible Hulk TV s.t. Joe Harnell - "The Lonely Man Theme" - The Incredible Hulk TV s.t. Ken - "Leaving the air" Sound effects - "Bears" - 49 Bears Live phone caller - "Going off the air together (I am the show)" Ken's Last Ever Radio Extravaganza - "A Little Scream (of me)" - Show #340, from Nov. 9, 2004 [The greatest gift is the smile you give to your brother. - McDonald's Corp., 1972] - "Classical piece" McDonald's - "McDonald's training tape" Alan Watts - "Overlooking the significance of the world" Michael Kamen - Brazil s.t. - "Political thing about George W. Bush" - "Political thing about cars or gas" Steven Jesse Bernstein - "The Man Upstairs" - Prison Antonio Vivaldi - "Cello Concerto in E Minor, third movement" Monty Python - "My scorn for any military solution" - Monty Python's Flying Circus McDonald's - "Hey, how long do I have to wait, here?" - McDonald's training tape [I never ordered Cokes, I wanted milkshakes! If I wanted fries, I would've asked for them.] Tape Beatles - "Beautiful state" - Music With Sound Vol. 2 [I'm so happy] Richard Stallman, others - "Documentary about Linux and Free Software (vs. Open Source)" - Revolution OS - "Some interesting ambient noise music" Tape Beatles - "Various" - Music With Sound Vol. 2 - "Something political" - "Excerpts, crying, theme music, Lara Flynn-Boyle" - Twin Peaks pilot episode When In Rome - "The Promise" [Loops] Michael Moore - "People don't want to work" - Roger and Me Ken's Last Ever Radio Extravaganza - "Some 2004 episode, slowed down and sped up" Live phone caller - "What's with all the screaming?" Ken - "Ending, screams fading" Drahomira Song Orchestra - "Argentine" https://www.wfmu.org/playlists/shows/78811
Ken's Last Ever Radio Extravaganza - "One Step Closer" - Show #335, from Sept. 28, 2004 [Corporate propaganda, TV, bears: noise. Full source playlist] Emergency Alert System - "Required Weekly Test" Exxon - "Energy For a Strong America" - Commercials from the 80's [For the children on the way, it'll be their world someday. One step closer at the end of every day. Here at Exxon, we pursue a long-range plan.] Lone Star Radio Network - "Tire Pressure" - Texas Clean Air Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "Breathing Polluted Air" - Texas Clean Air Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "Top 10 Air Pollution Tips" - Texas Clean Air Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "Vehicle Maintenance" - Texas Clean Air Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "R-Rated Movies and Substance Abuse" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Commercials - "General Electric commercial" - Commercials from the 80's [GE: We bring good things to life] Lone Star Radio Network - "Long-term Marijuana Use" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "Marijuana and Your Children" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Lone Star Radio Network - "60,000 Reasons" - On the Road in Texas Lone Star Radio Network - "Speed Use Among Women" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Commercials - "New Coke commercial with Bill Cosby" - Commercials from the 80's Lone Star Radio Network - "The New Face of PCP" - The Drug-Free Texas Minute Commercials - "American Airlines commercial" - Commercials from the 80's [We're American Airlines: Doing what we do best.] Commercials - "American Airlines corporate theme" - Commercials from the 80's Lone Star Radio Network - "Roadside Breakdowns" - On the Road in Texas Commercials - "The promise of Florida" Lone Star Radio Network - "Turn Signals" - On the Road in Texas Stuart Crombie & Dennis Berry - "Bargains Galore" - Production Music - Music for TV Dinners - The '50s Ken - "Identification" Catholic Homily - "Catholic Homily for Tuesday 9/28/2004" Robert Zemeckis, director, writer; Bob Gale, writer; Michael J. Fox, Crispen Glover, actors - "Marty! Hey, George, you weren't at school today" - Back to the Future Complete Soundtrack (film excerpts) Robert Zemeckis, director, writer; Bob Gale, writer; Christopher Lloyd, actor - "1.21 Gigawatts" - Back to the Future Complete Soundtrack (film excerpts) [How could I be so careless?] Catholic Homily - "Catholic Homily for Monday 9/27/2004" Big City Orchestra - "Yank" - Chimpy [George W. Bush: "I asked him, why Yank? He said he didn't have enough time to explain."] Game Shows - "Wheel of Fotune, Trivia Trap, Scrabble, Second Chance, Wordplay, Trump Card, TTTT 1990, Strike It Rich" - Game Shows from the 80's Stormy Sacks - "The New Hollywood Squares" - Game Shows from the 80's News Themes - "Various" - Local TV News Themes from the 80's Jack Beaver - "Workaday World" - Production Music - Music for TV Dinners - The '50s Sound effects - "Bear Eating Moan Growl 1" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear, Eating; Wet Chewing; Breathing; Room Tone" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Snore; Exhale; Breaths" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Faster Panting; Varies" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Groaning Growls Growls" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Angry; Moaning Growls" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Black Bear, Sniffing; Licking, Light Groans" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Groaning and Moaning; Growls" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Growls" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Large Black Bear, Foraging and Snarling" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Large Black Bear, Single Breath" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Black Bear, Heavy Licking; Close Perspective" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Large Black Bear, Single Roar" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Bear Panda Cub; Mewing; Movement" - 49 Bears Sound effects - "Black Bear, Moan and Roar" - 49 Bears Monty Python - "I'm So Worried" - The Final Rip Off [with Terry Jones] The Rolling Stones - "She's a Rainbow" - Their Satanic Majesties Request [Looping and layering of 7 excerpts and one reversed excerpt; listen to Terminal Sunshine (Like a Rainbow Canon) for much more] The Emotions - "The Best of My Love" - Boogie Nights s.t. Steve Roden - "Crop Circles" - Crop Circles [Field recording] Ken - "I don't know if it matters" Walt Disney - "Main Street Electrical Parade" - The Music of Disney - A Legacy in Song [A bunch of copies] Ken - "If you think it is" Joe Harnell - "Graveyard Farewell (Pilot)" - The Incredible Hulk TV s.t. Joe Harnell - "The Lonely Man Theme" - The Incredible Hulk TV s.t. Ken - "Leaving the air" Sound effects - "Bears" - 49 Bears Live phone caller - "Going off the air together (I am the show)" Ken's Last Ever Radio Extravaganza - "A Little Scream (of me)" - Show #340, from Nov. 9, 2004 [The greatest gift is the smile you give to your brother. - McDonald's Corp., 1972] - "Classical piece" McDonald's - "McDonald's training tape" Alan Watts - "Overlooking the significance of the world" Michael Kamen - Brazil s.t. - "Political thing about George W. Bush" - "Political thing about cars or gas" Steven Jesse Bernstein - "The Man Upstairs" - Prison Antonio Vivaldi - "Cello Concerto in E Minor, third movement" Monty Python - "My scorn for any military solution" - Monty Python's Flying Circus McDonald's - "Hey, how long do I have to wait, here?" - McDonald's training tape [I never ordered Cokes, I wanted milkshakes! If I wanted fries, I would've asked for them.] Tape Beatles - "Beautiful state" - Music With Sound Vol. 2 [I'm so happy] Richard Stallman, others - "Documentary about Linux and Free Software (vs. Open Source)" - Revolution OS - "Some interesting ambient noise music" Tape Beatles - "Various" - Music With Sound Vol. 2 - "Something political" - "Excerpts, crying, theme music, Lara Flynn-Boyle" - Twin Peaks pilot episode When In Rome - "The Promise" [Loops] Michael Moore - "People don't want to work" - Roger and Me Ken's Last Ever Radio Extravaganza - "Some 2004 episode, slowed down and sped up" Live phone caller - "What's with all the screaming?" Ken - "Ending, screams fading" Drahomira Song Orchestra - "Argentine" http://www.wfmu.org/playlists/shows/78811
Leeds UK grunge pop trio Night Owls share Better With Age, the second punishing cut from their ‘Tragically Human’ EP due for release next month. Snarling, ferocious and dripping with fury, the Leeds outfit’s latest offering sees them incorporate experimental electronic influences within their distinctive sound, whilst retaining their boundless energy and trademark vocals to […]
Oh we do like to be beside the seaside! The Welcome To Horror Team brave potential hypothermia by taking the Horrormobile to Southend in January, and attend Day 2 of the Horror-On-Sea Film Festival! Apologies re-sound quality as we recorded Gonzo-Style between films! Such a great day, an excellent mixture of shorts and features, all reviewed in this bonus episode. If you like what you hear, remember to check out the Horror-On-Sea facebook page, they have a full programme this coming weekend (26,27 & 28th of Jan 2018) - why not check it out yourself, we had a blast and caught some truly great stuff you probably won’t find at your local cinema. Features reviewed: “Egomaniac”, “Holy Terrors”, “The Snarling” and “Witches Brew”. Shorts reviewed: “Alex”, “Chihuahua Man”, “Devil Town”, “The Flytipper”, “Happy Valentines”, “Life of the Party” and “Weird World of Molly Brown”
In today's podcast, we talk about what the Five Eyes see. Implications of North Korean responsibility for WannaCry. Defense and deterrence go with naming and shaming. The Lazarus Group looks to cryptocurrency theft to redress North Korean financial shortfalls. Copperfield cyber espionage campaign in the Middle East. GDPR approaches, and organizations look to get their data houses in order (and buy insurance). Justin Harvey from Accenture on choosing threat intelligence. Guest is Stan Engelbrecht from D3 Security on the vulnerabilities in public transportation. And what to do if your child gets a phone from Santa.
#tindogpodcast @bigfinish #doctorwho EQUILIBRIUM RELEASED FEBRUARY PRICES CD £14.99 Download £12.99 Synopsis Still looking for a way out of E-Space, the TARDIS crashes to Isenfel - a realm of snow and ice. Snarling beasts stalk the frozen plains, a feisty princess leads the hunt, and a queen in an ice palace rules over her loyal subjects.But this is no fairytale kingdom, and everyone in Isenfel knows the price of survival. While Nyssa and Tegan uncover deadly secrets hidden in the palace, Turlough flees for his life across the tundra.And as for the Doctor... he only ever wants to change things for the better. But in a world such as Isenfel, such a hope may not even be possible. Written By: Matt FittonDirected By: Ken Bentley Cast Peter Davison (The Doctor), Sarah Sutton (Nyssa), Janet Fielding (Tegan), Mark Strickson (Turlough), Annette Badland (Queen Karlina), Nickolas Grace (Balancer Skaarsgard/Viktor Skaarsgard), Joanna Kirkland (Inger), John Albasiny (Jesper),Ella Kennion (Romy)