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Why connection is the key to a life well lived.The new year gives us an opportunity to reflect on who we are and who we want to be. As we set resolutions and prepare for evolutions, this special four-part series on communication, happiness, and well-being explores practical ways to enhance our lives through better communication, deeper connections, and more meaningful choices.When it comes to happiness, Arthur Brooks says it's not about reaching a destination — it's about heading in the right direction. And according to him, that direction is fundamentally about relationships."Loving more people... more and more love... if you pursue that, you will defy the trends and get happier,” says Brooks, a social scientist, Harvard Business School professor, and author of several books including Build the Life You Want: The Art and Science of Getting Happier, cowritten with Oprah Winfrey. According to him, a happy life is made of enjoyment, satisfaction, and meaning, which we cultivate through connection with others. "Faith, family, friends, and work, that's your basic happiness 401k plan,” he says.In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Brooks and host Matt Abrahams explore the fundamental role of relationships in creating a happy life, and how effective communication helps us build and maintain these essential connections.This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at BetterHelp.com/ThinkFast and get ten percent off your first month.Episode Reference Links:Arthur Brooks Arthur's Book: Build the Life You Want: The Art and Science of Getting Happier Connect:Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart PremiumEmail Questions & Feedback >>> hello@fastersmarter.ioEpisode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart WebsiteNewsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.ioThink Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTubeMatt Abrahams >>> LinkedInChapters:(00:00) - Introduction (02:27) - Defining Happiness (03:58) - The Macronutrients of Happiness (05:00) - Challenges in Pursuing Happiness (06:27) - Breaking Down Meaning in Life (08:11) - Happiness Across Life Stages (11:16) - Modern Happiness Challenges (14:29) - Mindfulness and Being Present (19:08) - The Final Three Questions (22:54) - Conclusion ********Become a Faster Smarter Supporter by joining TFTS Premium.Take advantage of our Sponsor offer from BetterHelp
This week, Alex Hutchison, writer and author of Endure and The Explorer’s Gene: Why We Seek Big Challenges, New Flavors, and the Blank Spots on the Map, talks about the Arrival Fallacy - that what we expect to feel after we accomplish a goal like getting a promotion or running a marathon sometimes doesn’t quite match up with our expectations. Rather than seeking a life changing transformation, Hutchinsons says to focus on the satisfaction and joy that’s gained from the process of achievement and not necessarily the outcome.
In this episode, my guest is Dr. Laurie Santos, Ph.D., a professor of psychology and cognitive science at Yale University and a leading researcher on happiness and fulfillment. We discuss what truly increases happiness, examining factors such as money, social comparison, free time, alone time versus time spent with others, pets, and the surprising positive impact of negative visualizations. We also explore common myths and truths about introverts and extroverts, the science of motivation, and how to adjust your hedonic set point to experience significantly more joy in daily life. Throughout the episode, Dr. Santos shares science-supported strategies for enhancing emotional well-being and cultivating a deeper sense of meaning and happiness. Read the full show notes at hubermanlab.com. Thank you to our sponsors AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman Eight Sleep: https://eightsleep.com/huberman ExpressVPN: https://expressvpn.com/huberman Function: https://functionhealth.com/huberman LMNT: https://drinklmnt.com/huberman David: https://drinklmnt.com/huberman Timestamps 00:00:00 Dr. Laurie Santos 00:02:52 Sponsors: Eight Sleep & ExpressVPN 00:06:00 Happiness, Emotion & Cognition; Emotional Contagion 00:11:18 Extrinsic vs. Intrinsic Rewards 00:14:43 Money, Comparison & Happiness 00:21:39 Tool: Increase Social Connection; Real-Time Communication 00:32:16 Sponsor: AG1 00:33:47 Technology, Information, Social Interaction 00:39:22 Loneliness, Youth, Technology 00:42:16 Cravings, Sustainable Actions, Dopamine 00:47:01 Social Connection & Predictions; Introverts & Extroverts 00:57:22 Sponsors: Function & LMNT 01:00:41 Social Connection & Frequency; Tools: Fun; “Presence” & Technology 01:07:53 Technology & Negative Effects; Tool: Senses & Grounding; Podcasts 01:15:11 Negativity Bias, Gratitude, Tool: “Delight” Practice & Shifting Emotions 01:25:01 Sponsor: David 01:26:17 Importance of Negative Emotions; Judgements about Happiness 01:34:16 Happiness & Cultural Differences, Tool: Focus on Small Pleasures 01:41:00 Dogs, Monkeys & Brain, “Monkey Mind” 01:47:40 Monkeys, Perspective, Planning 01:53:58 Dogs, Cats, Dingos; Pets & Happiness 02:00:49 Time Famish; Tools: Time Affluence Breaks; Time Confetti & Free Time 02:07:46 Hedonic Adaptation; Tool: Spacing Happy Experiences 02:15:27 Contrast, Comparison & Happiness; Tool: Bronze Lining, Negative Visualization 02:24:08 Visualization, Bannister Effect; Tool: Imagine Obstacles 02:29:12 Culture; Arrival Fallacy, Tool: Journey Mindset 02:37:11 Mortality, Memento Mori, Tool: Fleeting Experiences & Contrast 02:44:33 Awe 02:48:15 Timescales; Community Engagement & Signature Strengths; Tool: Job Crafting 02:56:55 Strength Date, Leisure Time; Tool: Doing for Others, Feel Good Do Good 03:01:42 Tool: Asking for Help 03:05:32 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow & Reviews, Sponsors, YouTube Feedback, Social Media, Protocols Book, Neural Network Newsletter Disclaimer & Disclosures
In this raw and unfiltered episode of Dr. Tami Talks, Dr. Tami delves into the concept of “arrival fallacy”—the idea that reaching a specific milestone or goal will bring us the fulfillment, success, or happiness we seek. With heartfelt vulnerability and transformative insights, Dr. Tami guides listeners to reframe their journeys, embrace the present, and unhook from external validation. Tune in for an intimate conversation about reclaiming your worth, overcoming limiting beliefs, and stepping into your power as the creator of your own life experience.Key Takeaways:1.What is Arrival Fallacy? The belief that achieving external goals will result in inner satisfaction, when in reality, the expected emotional payoff often doesn't materialize.2.The Power of the Journey: True fulfillment comes from aligning your journey with the emotions and values you seek, rather than postponing joy for an imagined future.3.You Are Enough: Your worth isn't tied to external achievements or circumstances—it exists because you exist.4.Feedback, Not Failure: Recognize arrival fallacy as valuable feedback about your belief systems and an opportunity for growth.***Looking for something more? Check out my website: www.drtamiberry.comAlready know you wanna work with me? That's great! Learn more & apply by CLICKING HEREWanna stay connected? Yay--me too!Follow me on IG: @tamiberry.mdFollow me on LinkedIn: @tamiberry.md
Join the Something For Everybody Community on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/AaronMachbitz Buy Me a Coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/SomethingForEverybody - Subscribe to my newsletter: https://aaronmachbitz.com/ Something For Everybody Merchandise → https://shopforeverybody.com/collections/somethingforeverybody
Cindy Esliger addresses the arrival fallacy in this episode. That belief that once we reach a certain milestone in our careers everything will fall into place, as if by magic, and we will arrive in perpetual happiness. We will have “made it” into the mythological destination where we enter reward and leave the struggle. This fallacy doesn't actually work because rewards, experiences, professional growth, and fulfillment only occur as part of the journey, not as an arrival bonus. Cindy breaks down how to see the journey as fulfilling and abandon our obsession with instant gratification. When we are only focused on the destination, the goal, and the end result, we tend to miss the transformative work in between. We tune out more, we rush things, we don't want to learn. We simply want to arrive and be recognized. Cindy describes how to view the process of working as a reward in itself because of how it enriches our lives. She explains why going through the trials and grind of daily work to learn and flourish is ultimately better for our careers than immediate reward. It's difficult to shift out of the finish line mindset, so Cindy has three tips to make shifting into enjoying continual improvement easier: 1) Set process goals, 2) Celebrate the wins and learn from the losses, and 3) Reflect regularly. Cindy wants us to recognize that satisfaction in our career journey is kind of the point of our work. Fixating solely on the destination means we are never living in the now and are not learning how to grow beyond expectations. Join Cindy as she breaks down exactly why the arrival fallacy is exactly that, a fallacy.Resources discussed in this episode:Guide to Reshaping Your Career OutlookAstronomic AudioConfidence Collective—Contact Cindy Esliger Career Confidence Coaching: website | instagram | facebook | linkedin | email
F-Stop Collaborate and Listen - A Landscape Photography Podcast
In the latest episode, renowned photographer John Putnam joins host Matt Payne to share insightful discussions on blending family life with a demanding photography career. Throughout their conversation, both photographers unearth the significant impact of integrating personal experiences with professional endeavors and how this synthesis can redefine the essence of success in the field of photography. Resources Mentioned on the Podcast: My conversation with David DuChemin. Arrival Fallacy. Join us on Nature Photographer's Network, and use the code FSTOP10 for a 10% discount! Support the podcast on Patreon, and catch our bonus conversation where we discuss artist vs. photographer. John Putnam's Private Workshops: Listeners can use the code "justfstopit" for a 10% discount on all private workshops held in Acadia National Park. Photographers Mentioned on the Podcast: Greta Rybiss Chris Bennett Mac Stone - his photo, "Midnight Oil."
It's week one of the Summer of Surviving Publishing here at Camp Turning to Story, and we're covering the arrival fallacy. Sometimes we believe achieving a goal will make all our woes disappear: agents, books deals, movies... Gather around the campfire as authors Anna Mercier and Lyssa Mia Smith debunk arrival fallacies and discuss ways to maintain peace throughout the publishing journey. Join the Turning to Story Substack for extra resources and info!
In this episode, I discuss classic rock songs, arrival fallacy, impact basis and how to be more resilient. Listen to me try to tie in all these themes to summer music. Hope you will listen and chill out :)Songs in this episode:The Boys Are Back In Town by Thin Lizzy,Badlands by Bruce Springsteen,American Girl by Tom Petty, Say hi on Instagram @positively_chill
Tune into an enlightening episode where Ethan and Jared Thomas, the dynamic duo of Brothers Creed Podcast, explore the powerful concept of "Carpe Diem" or "Seize the Day". They discuss the significance of cherishing and plucking each day when it's ripe, and dig into the profound ties of this principle with "Memento Mori", a Latin phrase reminding us of our mortality and life's fleeting nature. With engaging and thoughtful conversation, this episode affirms the necessity to live in the 'now' in a world obsessed with the past and the future. It examines common cognitive fallacies such as sunk cost and arrival fallacy that often distort rational thinking and foster unrealistic expectations. This is an episode for anyone who yearns to grasp the art of being fully present in each precious moment of life. The discussion deepens as the Thomas brothers identify prevalent happiness fallacies that can hinder us from experiencing joy in the present moment, including the Sunk Cost Fallacy and the Arrival Fallacy. These narratives from various life stages and personal experiences provide profound insight into the treasures and traps of truly living in the moment. Delving into the complex world of time perspectives, the hosts underscore the value of appreciating the present without letting past disappointments or future uncertainties cloud our perspective. They inspire listeners with anecdotes and quotes by luminaries such as Benjamin Franklin and Muhammad Ali, sharing how each day is an opportunity to make a meaningful impact. In this heartfelt and thought-provoking episode, learn to navigate the delicate balance between reminiscing about the past, planning for the future, and soaking in the present. It's a call to seize the fleeting moments of life and enrich the journey of self-discovery and growth. Make every day count with the Brothers Creed Podcast. For more from us follow us on these platforms: Follow us on Instagram @a.brothers.creed Follow us on YouTube Follow us on TikTok @a.brothers.creed
If you've ever achieved a big goal, was it everything you'd hoped? Probably not. Callum Wilson dreamt of representing England's national rugby team since he was a kid, but when it happened, it didn't change his life the way he'd hoped. Sidebar: This is NOT an episode about rugby. It's a powerful, tender conversation about how a tattooed, 113kg overachiever handled “arrival fallacy” – the concept that if we just achieve that big goal, THEN we'll be happy. You'll learn why diversifying your “goal portfolio” can create a positive shift, and how to handle the negative inner chatter when it insists you're not enough. Links: Callum Wilson on LinkedIn. NYT article on Arrival Fallacy, with Dr Ben-Shahar
In this episode, I introduce you to the concept of the arrival fallacy, explaining how the pursuit of future milestones can prevent you from experiencing present moments of happiness. I stress the importance of experiencing joy and satisfaction throughout your academic, career, and life journey, not just when achieving goals. To learn more, check out the following books: Happier : Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment. 2007. Boston: McGraw-Hill. Happier No Matter What : Cultivating Hope Resilience and Purpose in Hard Times. 2021. New York: Experim2021. Preorder my forthcoming book by going to isgradschoolforme.com. Book me to speak at your upcoming professional development event. Follow me on your favorite social media platforms: Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, and Twitter Get my free 15-page Grad School Femtoring Resource Kit, which includes essential information to prepare for and navigate grad school Click the links to support the show with a one-time donation or monthly donation. And to learn more about our sponsorship packages, email us at gradschoolfemtoring@gmail.com. To download episode transcripts and access more resources, go to my website: https://gradschoolfemtoring.com/podcast/ *The Grad School Femtoring Podcast is for educational purposes only and not intended to be a substitute for therapy or other professional services.* --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/gradschoolfemtoring/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/gradschoolfemtoring/support
Find your Dharma—your inner calling—and learn to integrate ambition, work, and wellbeing to create a balanced, joyous life with the bestselling author, and visiting scholar at Harvard Medical School, Suneel Gupta, We discussWhat Dharma means—and how to find itHow the “Arrival Fallacy” impacts your fulfillmentThe 55/5 technique for resetting your energyWhy you achieve more with 85% effortShow NotesWeekly Newsletter Sign-Up: http://bit.ly/37hqtQW Follow Career Contessa: http://bit.ly/2TMH2QP Guest Resources:Suneel Gupta: https://www.suneelgupta.com/Everyday Dharma: https://www.suneelgupta.com/writing/everyday-dharma/Career Contessa ResourcesBook 1:1 career coaching session: https://www.careercontessa.com/hire-a-mentor/ Take an online course: https://www.careercontessa.com/education/ Get your personalized salary report: https://www.careercontessa.com/the-salary-project/ Browse open jobs: https://www.careercontessa.com/jobs/Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
the arrival fallacy refers to the belief that attaining a particular goal will lead to long-term happiness. in other words- when i (fill in the blank), i will be happy. when happiness is placed on a goal or tangible outcome outside of self, then we have unconsciously wired our brain to believe that happiness is not in the present moment. while the arrival fallacy isn't something to overcome overnight, actively searching for the root cause of the need to fill a void with things, people, and places outside of self is a great place to start. within this journey, you'll understand that happiness, peace, joy, and love exists inside of you. it's not in this far away space in the future. you are whole now. you are worthy now. you are enough now. so, search no further. COME TO BALI WITH ME + BGM connect with ri: YouTube | Instagram | Tiktok connect with sunset tim: Music | Instagram connect with FTHH: YouTube | Instagram | TikTok | FTHH Website Music by $HVN if you are a brand that is interested in partnering with us, please email contact@forthehealthyhoes.com. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/forthehealthyhoes/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/forthehealthyhoes/support
Summary In this episode, Jeffery Downs discusses an article titled 'Is This It? On the Disappointment of Success' by Greg Vanourek. The article explores the concept of the arrival fallacy, which is the assumption that achieving a major goal will bring lasting happiness and satisfaction. Jeffery highlights examples of successful individuals who experienced disappointment after reaching their goals. He explains the factors that contribute to this disappointment, including the hedonic treadmill and the focus on outcome and achievement. Jeffery introduces streaking as an alternative approach to goal-setting, emphasizing the importance of enjoying the journey and focusing on daily, weekly, and monthly streaks. He concludes by discussing the power of streaking in avoiding the disappointment of success and invites listeners to explore streaking as a framework for personal growth and fulfillment. Takeaways The arrival fallacy is the belief that achieving a major goal will bring lasting happiness and satisfaction, but it often leads to disappointment. Successful individuals, such as Michael Phelps and Tom Brady, have experienced depression and a sense of emptiness after reaching their goals. The hedonic treadmill is the tendency to quickly adapt to changes in circumstances and return to a baseline level of happiness. Focusing on inputs, such as daily, weekly, and monthly streaks, can bring more joy and fulfillment than solely focusing on outcomes and achievements. Streaking offers a framework for personal growth and fulfillment by emphasizing the process, enjoying the journey, and becoming who you want to be. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Background 01:01 Introduction to the Article 02:23 The Arrival Fallacy 03:22 Examples of Disappointment in Success 04:50 Factors Contributing to Disappointment 07:16 The Hedonic Treadmill 09:12 The Role of Inputs in Finding Joy and Happiness 13:03 Actions to Address the Arrival Fallacy 18:15 Streaking as an Alternative to Goal-Setting 23:30 The Power of Streaking 29:30 Avoiding the Disappointment of Success through Streaking 31:04 Conclusion and Next Steps Live an intentional life, start Streaking. Streaking is the social media app for intentional self-improvement. Download Streaking app and start your own streaks also invite your friends to follow and celebrate your progress! You can learn more about Streaking by buying the book at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, or Indie Books. Keep Streakin'
Do you ever feel like you're running on a never ending hamster wheel of stress? Do you ever feel like you'll be happy once the kids are out of the difficult stage they are in right now? Today we will talk about a common misconception in life to rectify it so you'll have more harmony in your home. Reply to this email with what you think about this episode and/or if you want to sign up for pocket coaching. Check out our sponsor Herbal Face Food and support the show by clicking the link https://tinyurl.com/KellysFavoriteAntiAgingSerum and using the code Harmony20 at checkout for 20% off. Subscribe on Apple! Subscribe on Android! Join my FREE parenting bootcamp! Let's Connect! Here's where you can find me: Learn more at https://www.coachingkelly.com. Find me on Instagram! Find me on Facebook!
On this episode of The PWR Podcast, hosts Nicole and Sarah explore the common pitfalls in New Year resolutions, emphasizing the tendency to overachieve and the detrimental effects of tying future happiness to specific goals. They discuss the "Arrival Fallacy" and discuss the importance of distinguishing between avoidance and approach goals. Next, they'll talk about the WOOP Approach to Goal Setting—Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan—emphasizing the significance of visualizing outcomes and overcoming internal obstacles. They stress the need to set realistic, attainable goals and provide practical steps to strategically define and achieve objectives. The episode concludes with highlighting the process of goal accomplishment, the importance of celebrating small victories, and the exclusive PWR Facebook group for client support. Tune in for insightful discussions on goal-setting with integrity and a growth mindset! #PWRtothePPL Find PWR on Instagram: @pwr_518 Find Nicole on Instagram: @nfcardarelli Find Sarah on Instagram: @sar_rah_ward --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pwr518/message
Welcome to year two/season two of Man in the Arena with Craig Spear! Today I am talking about goals. Not because it's the new year. I am talking about goals because GOALS MATTER.Goals make use happier, they make life easier and most importantly, goals give our lives meaning and purpose.It turns out that how you set goals also matters. With that, in today's episode I'm sharing my system of how to set health goals and actually follow through on them. I'm also sharing five key mistakes we make when setting goals and how to use my system to avoid them.Lastly, I am going to tell you about The Arrival Fallacy and what you should focus on instead as you pursue your goals.Did you find this episode helpful insightful or motivating? If so, let's connect! You can find me on....InstagramLinked InThe Spear Method Website
The Weekly Blitz is brought to you by our friends over at Shop Marketing Pros. If you want to take your shop to the next level, you need great marketing. Shop Marketing Pros does top-tier marketing for top-tier shops. The Weekly Blitz is brought to you by our friends over at Shop Marketing Pros. If you want to take your shop to the next level, you need great marketing. Shop Marketing Pros does top-tier marketing for top-tier shops. Click here to learn more about Top Tier Marketing by Shop Marketing Pros and schedule a demo:https://shopmarketingpros.com/chris/Check out their podcast here: https://autorepairmarketing.captivate.fm/If you would like to join their private facebook group go here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/autorepairmarketingmastermindIn this podcast episode, Coach Chris Cotton from Auto Fix Auto Shop Coaching discusses the vital role of coaching and goal setting for auto repair shop owners. He stresses the importance of personal and professional development, the psychological aspects of goal setting, and the impact of fresh starts and landmark dates. Cotton distinguishes between avoidance and approach goals, shares personal examples, and explores goal-setting frameworks, including the categorization of goals and the concept of anti-goals. He warns against the arrival fallacy and offers tools and methods for effective goal setting. Concluding, Cotton motivates shop owners to focus on happiness and improvement in the new year.Coaching Up (00:02:17) Coach Chris discusses the concept of coaching and its importance in improving skills and performance.Fresh Start Goals (00:05:22) The significance of landmark dates and the psychological impact on motivation for pursuing goals.Approach vs. Avoidance Goals (00:07:04) Differentiating between approach and avoidance goals and their impact on goal achievement.Goal Setting Framework (00:09:39) Sahil Bloom's advice on goal setting frameworks, including major goals, checkpoint goals, and anti-goals.The Arrival Fallacy (00:12:47) The false assumption that achieving a goal will lead to lasting happiness and the impact of defining success based on extrinsic goals.Tools for Goal Setting (00:14:50) Sahil Bloom's simple approach to goal tracking and the availability of apps and templates for goal setting.Various Goal Setting Methods (00:15:55) A rundown of popular goal setting methods, including SMART goals, hard goals, KPI-related goals, and big hairy audacious goals.Connect with Chris:chris@autofixsos.comPhone: 940.400.1008www.autoshopcoaching.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/AutoFixAutoShopCoachingYoutube: https://bit.ly/3ClX0ae #autofixautoshopcoaching #autofixbeautofixing #autoshopprofits #autoshopprofit #autoshopprofitsfirst #autoshopleadership #autoshopmanagement #autorepairshopcoaching #autorepairshopconsulting #autorepairshoptraining #autorepairshop #autorepair #serviceadvisor #serviceadvisorefficiency #autorepairshopmarketing #theweeklyblitz #autofix #shopmarketingpros
The Weekly Blitz is brought to you by our friends over at Shop Marketing Pros. If you want to take your shop to the next level, you need great marketing. Shop Marketing Pros does top-tier marketing for top-tier shops. Click here to learn more about Top Tier Marketing by Shop Marketing Pros and schedule a demo:https://shopmarketingpros.com/chris/Check out their podcast here: https://autorepairmarketing.captivate.fm/If you would like to join their private facebook group go here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/autorepairmarketingmastermindIn this podcast episode, Coach Chris Cotton from Auto Fix Auto Shop Coaching discusses the vital role of coaching and goal setting for auto repair shop owners. He stresses the importance of personal and professional development, the psychological aspects of goal setting, and the impact of fresh starts and landmark dates. Cotton distinguishes between avoidance and approach goals, shares personal examples, and explores goal-setting frameworks, including the categorization of goals and the concept of anti-goals. He warns against the arrival fallacy and offers tools and methods for effective goal setting. Concluding, Cotton motivates shop owners to focus on happiness and improvement in the new year.Coaching Up (00:02:17) Coach Chris discusses the concept of coaching and its importance in improving skills and performance.Fresh Start Goals (00:05:22) The significance of landmark dates and the psychological impact on motivation for pursuing goals.Approach vs. Avoidance Goals (00:07:04) Differentiating between approach and avoidance goals and their impact on goal achievement.Goal Setting Framework (00:09:39) Sahil Bloom's advice on goal setting frameworks, including major goals, checkpoint goals, and anti-goals.The Arrival Fallacy (00:12:47) The false assumption that achieving a goal will lead to lasting happiness and the impact of defining success based on extrinsic goals.Tools for Goal Setting (00:14:50) Sahil Bloom's simple approach to goal tracking and the availability of apps and templates for goal setting.Various Goal Setting Methods (00:15:55) A rundown of popular goal setting methods, including SMART goals, hard goals, KPI-related goals, and big hairy audacious goals.Connect with Chris:chris@autofixsos.comPhone: 940.400.1008www.autoshopcoaching.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/AutoFixAutoShopCoachingYoutube: https://bit.ly/3ClX0ae #autofixautoshopcoaching #autofixbeautofixing #autoshopprofits #autoshopprofit #autoshopprofitsfirst #autoshopleadership #autoshopmanagement #autorepairshopcoaching #autorepairshopconsulting #autorepairshoptraining #autorepairshop #autorepair #serviceadvisor #serviceadvisorefficiency #autorepairshopmarketing #theweeklyblitz #autofix #shopmarketingpros
Emma Ganon on The Success Myth, our obsession with achievement and how to let go of the idea of having it all. We dive into her creative journey as an entrepreneur and writer of both nonfiction and fiction and the world of Substack. We also talk about Emma's different income streams, reflections on her Self-Publishing Era, and we look at how she distributes her time and energy. This was a heartfelt discussion about the pressure of wanting success and wanting happiness, navigating those both and how we might ultimately craft a creative life on our own terms.*ABOUT EMMA GANNON Emma Gannon is a Sunday Times bestselling author, broadcaster, speaker, novelist and creator of the no.1 careers podcast in the UK, Ctrl Alt Delete. She has been a columnist for The Times, Telegraph and Courier magazine. Emma has published multiple bestselling books, including The Multi-Hyphen Method; Sabotage and Disconnected. She writes a popular weekly newsletter called The Hyphen that is an exploration of ideas that have got her thinking in new ways.*RESOURCES & LINKSThe Success Myth by Emma Gannon Emma's Substack, The HyphenEmma's latest post, The Hyphen 2023 Round UpWriting a Novel: Bring Your Ideas to Life the Faber Academy Way by Richard SkinnerIt'll Be Fun, They Said by Jess Pan on Substack The Pound ProjectElizabeth Gilbert on Distinguishing Between Hobbies, Jobs, Careers, & VocationBill Plotkin on Mythopoetic Identity London Writers' Salon Interview with Seth Godin For show notes, transcripts and to attend our live podcasts visit: podcast.londonwriterssalon.comFor free writing sessions, join free Writers' Hours: writershour.com
Behavior Gap Radio: Exploring human behavior...with a Sharpie
Behavior Gap Radio: www.behaviorgapradio.com/
This Sunday we continue our new sermon series “From the Cradle to the Grave: Lessons from the Life of Mary.” In this second installment, we'll explore a POWERFULLY UPLIFTING LESSON we can learn from the incredibly difficult circumstances surrounding the birth of Jesus.
In the world of leadership, sometimes the most unexpected individuals rise to the occasion and make a profound impact. Picture this: a diagnostic radiologist turned military leader. It's a twist that no one saw coming, and yet, it had far-reaching effects on his career and those around him. But how did he navigate the challenges of leadership? How did he inspire his team to greater heights? There's a powerful story waiting to be told, so stay tuned to discover the surprising journey of this remarkable leader. “If we can address that thing, all these other things that we're trying to fight in the hospital get better.” - Paul Michaud In this episode, you will be able to: Learn how to navigate fear and anxiety to become a more confident and effective leader. Strengthen your conflict management skills and enhance communication for a more harmonious and productive workplace. Foster a culture of trust and open communication to promote collaboration and innovation within your team. Gain practical strategies to tackle difficult conversations and create an environment of open dialogue for better problem-solving and team cohesion. Discover the power of living in alignment with your personal values and how it can positively impact your leadership style and overall fulfillment in life. My special guest today is Paul Michaud. Paul is a father to 5 sons, Radiologist, Certified Physician Executive, and executive leadership coach. He served in the Army for over 13 years where he earned a reputation of creating exceptional work environments for his teammates and developing innovative leadership models for the organizations he has served. Notable past leadership positions include Chair, Department of Radiology, Chief Medical Officer, and Consultant to the Army Surgeon General. Paul currently serves as Professor of Radiology at West Virginia University, where he is pursuing his passion for teaching and developing the next generation of leaders. He is also an organizational leadership and executive coach with a particular interest in optimizing work environments and helping individuals navigate challenging life experiences such as trauma, divorce, and transitions in their career path. http://linkedin.com/in/paul-michaud-755287271 https://www.theinstituteofpurpose.com The key moments in this episode are: 00:00:00 - Introduction 00:01:25 - Becoming a Leader 00:04:09 - Goal as a Chief Medical Officer 00:07:01 - Autonomy and Productivity 00:09:54 - Trusting and Supporting Staff 00:14:10 - Leading with Transparency 00:18:10 - Handling Conflicts and Complaints 00:19:46 - Shifting Perspective: Complaints as Opportunities 00:22:13 - The Power of Communication and Feedback 00:24:02 - Autonomy and Individualized Approaches 00:29:10 - Addressing Concerns Professionally 00:29:59 - Importance of Near Misses 00:32:22 - Understanding Adverse Outcomes 00:33:59 - Personal Struggles Impacting Work 00:37:48 - Acknowledging Personal Struggles 00:44:00 - Career Decision and Loss of Identity 00:46:04 - Letting Go and Alignment 00:47:36 - The Arrival Fallacy and Integrity 00:50:44 - Inertia and Working in Alignment 00:54:51 - Finding the Right Fit
Have you ever wanted something badly, finally achieved it, and then found it didn't quite live up to the hype? Brad, Steve, and Clay discuss why this happens—and how you can protect against it.Got a question for the podcast?Leave us a voice memo at 6468935903You can find this episode on:iTunes and Apple PodcastsSpotifyAndroidStitcher Get Master of Change, Do Hard Things, and The Practice of Groundedness on audible (Or in hard copy: Master of Change here Hard Things here and Groundedness here). Please write a review on Apple Podcasts and help new listeners discover the show! Find Brad, Steve, and Clay on Twitter: @Bstulberg, @stevemagness, and @clayskipper Check out our exclusive community offers on Patreon here. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
One of the biggest myths of success is that at one point we will "arrive"- That we'll eventually reach a certain milestone after which we will have a sense of enduring happiness and contentment. In this we discuss everything Arrival Fallacy. What is it? Where does it come from? How do combat it?Join executive leadership & career coach Rikki Goldenberg, conscious leadership coach Justin Mulvaney, and licensed clinical psychologist turned creator coach Corey Wilks as we discuss all that and more.0:00 Cold Open1:30 Show Intro1:52 What is the Arrival Fallacy?2:54 Is Arrival / The Arrival Fallacy real or BS?3:55 Our experiences with the Arrival Fallacy13:12 Why “Arrival” is a Trap17:25 The Arrival Fallacy in Corey's outset into Content20:18 How the Arrival Fallacy shows up in Content Creators, Leaders, & Professionals36:00 The Arrival Fallacy as a result of our upbringing38:17 What do we do about the Arrival Fallacy?1:01:40 WrapupLearn more about the hosts:https://www.rikkigoldenberg.com/https://justinmulvaney.com/https://coreywilkspsyd.com/Intro Music Credit:http://www.aaronwaltersmusic.com/
For more details on this podcast visit: https://www.journeybeyondweightloss.com/blog/140 In this episode, we are breaking down the Arrival Fallacy, specifically in the context of weight loss. You'll discover what this intriguing phenomenon is and how it can impact your journey to a healthier you. But that's not all; we'll also provide you with valuable insights and strategies to help you overcome the Arrival Fallacy and maintain your hard-earned progress. Here's a sneak peek of what you can expect to learn:
In this episode of the Effective Challenge podcast, titled "Rethinking Success and Happiness: Escaping the Arrival Fallacy," I delve into the concept of the arrival fallacy coined by Harvard professor Tal Ben-Shahar. This fallacy revolves around believing that once we achieve a significant goal, we will find lasting happiness. Ben_Shahar's research started with obvering high-achieving students, however, this fallacy affects individuals across various fields, from actors to business professionals and athletes, who invest significant time in pursuit of something only to feel empty upon attainment. The discussion explores the Hedonic Adaptation Theory, which posits that few things substantially alter our default level of happiness. The theory suggests that we all have a relatively stable level of happiness, known as the hedonic set-point, persisting throughout our lives. Despite this, many feel like they are on a hedonic treadmill, continuously chasing after the next source of happiness. The podcast then offers practical strategies for managing the pursuit of happiness, emphasising the importance of adopting a balanced mindset and not postponing happiness based on future achievements. It encourages recognising the value of everyday activities, understanding the significance of consistent efforts in seemingly mundane tasks, and accepting both negative and positive emotions as natural parts of life. The podcast also advocates identifying and leveraging personal strengths, shifting focus towards controllable factors, and measuring success by living one's values day-to-day. Ultimately, the message is that by prioritising the basics and adopting a more nuanced approach to success, we increase our chances of achieving what we want while finding greater fulfilment along the way. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/effective-challenge/message
In this episode of The Burnout Recovery Podcast, host Dr Jo Braid discusses the concept of the Arrival Fallacy and how it can contribute to burnout. She shares practical strategies for avoiding this mindset and finding fulfillment in the journey rather than focusing solely on achieving goals. If you've ever found yourself thinking "I'll be happy when...", this episode will provide valuable insights on achieving balance and prioritizing self-care."The Arrival Fallacy: The arrival fallacy encourages people to prioritize short term happiness at the expense of their long term well-being."Have you entered the one year anniversary giveaway? Leave a review and share this podcast, send a message to hello@drjobraid.com and you are in the running for one of the three amazing gift packs! Good luck and thanks for listening. Disclaimer: The information provided on or through our Site, products and/or services is intended to be for informational purposes only. It does not constitute or replace professional advice for individual or specific situations and nor does it take into account your specific needs or circumstances. Under no circumstances should the content made available on our Site, or regarding our products and/or services be relied upon as professional legal, medical, financial, business or other advice. You agree to obtain these services if you need these. Our Site may have articles and content that is of a general nature and is intended to be for informational purposes only. Your access to and use of they Site is subject to our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Despite an audio hiccup (thank you for being patient!), the Girls chat about upcoming Madi's trip home, a well-traveled Etsy mug, and most importantly, the arrival fallacy and what it means in their lives.Follow us! @hyggegirlspodcast on Instagram & TikTokPersonal accounts: @madi_bares @emmaaroof @itsthehyggegirlsNEW every Monday!Interested in working together? hyggegirlspodcast@gmail.com We're always looking for guests + sponsors!*Produced by Hygge Girls™. All rights reserved.
Have you ever accomplished a big goal or achievement and felt a rush of happiness only to have it quickly fade? If so, you're not alone. In today's episode, Belinda and Erin explore the concept of arrival fallacy - a term coined by Dr. Tal Ben-Sharar, a Harvard trained positive psychologist. Listen in as they give helpful ways to counter this destructive tendency that leaves us feeling unsatisfied. Learn more about Erin and Belinda on their website: https://midlifestateofmindpodcast.com/ Follow them on social media: FB: https://www.facebook.com/midlifestateofmindpodcast IG: https://www.instagram.com/midlifestateofmindpodcast/
You can also listen to this episode on Spotify!What gives you meaning and purpose? How do you measure success? What does it mean to be healthy? Suneel Gupta is helping people grapple with these essential questions. His new book, Everyday Dharma: The Timeless Art of Finding Joy in What You Do, is about reconciling what we do with who we are. Gupta describes our “dharma” as our calling—or what Gupta's grandfather called our “essence.” Gupta recognizes the central tension between outward markers of success and finding this internal sense of purpose. A successful entrepreneur and bestselling author, Gupta has also grappled with depression and self-doubt, fueled by the natural tendency to measure success with external metrics instead of asking ourselves the “Why?”On this episode of Beyond the Prescription, Gupta explores the harms of hyper-vigilance and the power of vulnerability. They discuss the “Arrival Fallacy,” the false assumption that once you reach a goal, you will experience enduring happiness. He shares parts of his own process of self-discovery that allowed him to pursue his inner purpose and help others do the same.Join Dr. McBride every other Monday for a new episode of Beyond the Prescription.You can subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or on her Substack at https://lucymcbride.substack.com/podcast. You can sign up for her free weekly newsletter at lucymcbride.substack.com/welcome.Please be sure to like, rate, and review the show!The transcript of the show is here![00:00:00] Dr. Lucy McBride: Hello, and welcome to my office. I'm Dr. Lucy McBride, and this is Beyond the Prescription, the show where I talk with my guests like I do my patients, pulling the curtain back on what it means to be healthy, redefining health as more than the absence of disease. As a primary care doctor, I've realized that patients are more than their cholesterol and their weight.[00:00:31] We are the integrated sum of complex parts. Our stories live in our bodies. I'm here to help people tell their story and for you to imagine and potentially get healthier from the inside out. You can subscribe to my free weekly newsletter at lucymcbride.substack.com and to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.[00:00:57] So let's get into it and go Beyond The Prescription. My guest today is the ever dynamic. Suneel Gupta, who's passionate about helping people achieve success in a healthy, sustainable way. Suneel is a beloved speaker, a visiting scholar at Harvard Medical School, and best selling author of two books. His new book is just out. It's called, Everyday Dharma: The Timeless Art of Finding Joy in What You Do. It's really a practical guide to finding your dharma, your inner calling, and learning to integrate ambition, work, and well being to create a balanced life. The book combines Suneel's own stories with history science, Eastern philosophy, and Western methods. Suneel, thank you so much for joining me on the podcast today.[00:01:49] Suneel Gupta: Oh, Lucy, I'm so glad we were introduced and it's good to be here.[00:01:52] LM: So let's talk about Dharma. There's something about it that resonates with me as a physician who's in the constant quest tohelp patients pull the curtain back on their story. So what is Dharma?[00:02:04] SG: Yeah, I mean, I wrote this book really for the same reason. I think that we are experiencing an overwhelming sense of emptiness right now and society sort of speeding up. All right, we're using artificial intelligence, we're using automation to continue getting faster and more productive. But I think as individuals, we're kind of in a lot of ways moving in the opposite direction.[00:02:28] We are starting to feel like we are disassociating with our work, we are quietly quitting. And I think the result of all of it is that we are losing an emotional connection to what we do, which I think is a shame because we spend so much of our time either at a job or with the work that we do. [00:02:45] And to not feel that connection is, I think, I think it's devastating, right? It causes, I think, a lot of the symptoms that you talk about on this show. And so the reason that I wrote this book is because I wanted to to talk about how do we bring that emotional connection back to our work in a way that really feels real to us? And dharma is an age old philosophy really about that connection and one of the underpinnings of dharma is that while it may be tempting sometimes to try to find happiness and bliss outside of your work, there also is another path which is finding it through your work, right?[00:03:22] And Dharma is really the alignment of who you are and what you do, because when those two things are lined up, you feel creative, you feel energized. My grandfather called this your essence, right? And when you are expressing that essence, you're lit up, you're energized. But when you're not, you feel depleted, you feel burnt out.[00:03:43] And so I think the question for us is, how do we now start to come back to this essence, right? And it's something that's available to I think all of us. It's not the kind of thing that you get to luxuriate about when you've hit a certain level of status or wealth. I think it's it's available to every single one of us no matter where we are in our career the the challenge though is that most of us don't know what our Dharma is and even if we do understand to a certain degree, what our Dharma is, what our inner calling is, we don't necessarily feel like we have the time or the space or the money sometimes, or even the courage to pursue it. And I wanted to write this book because I wanted to go directly into those struggles. Not to write a book about what purpose is sitting behind a desk, but how do you take this thing that you feel that you need to express, right, it needs to speak, and how do you once and for all start to bring that into your everyday life?[00:04:39] LM: I love that I commonly talk with patients about this gap that exists in all of us between our best intentions and the execution of them. Meaning, like, we know we want to eat healthy. We want to exercise. We want to be more purposeful. We want to be more intentional. We want to put our phones down. We want to be happy and pursue things that are joyful, but there's that gap and the river is wide between the intentions and the execution. And you just said it, Suneel, sometimes the gap is filled with financial insecurity. Sometimes it's filled with logistical obstacles. Sometimes it's filled though, with fear and maybe even ambivalence, and then maybe even not knowing what your purpose is. So talk to me about how you might mind the gap. Those are my words, but how you kind of actualize and take control over your sort of sense of purpose and meaning.[00:05:37] SG: Yeah. So two different things that come together, right? Who I am and what I do, right? And I think the what I do is the execution. Who I am is really sort of getting into like, what it is I care about. Let's start with who I am because I think that's just a natural place where I think a lot of us, I think me, me included would skip over. And the reason I would skip it over is because I would look to what everybody else sort of had, right? I would look to people I saw with nice cars and nice homes and really nice sounding LinkedIn profiles and bios. And I'd say, let me go follow that. And what I found over time is that I was really walking somebody else's path, not my own.[00:06:12] And I think the work to sort of coming back to yourself and understanding what you want, it doesn't have to be something that you go on a huge meditation retreat. to do, right? I think it comes through starting to ask yourself certain questions. And in the book, I go through a list of sort of questions that really sort of helped me kind of get to this point.[00:06:31] I call these the chisels. And the reason I call these the chisels is because Michelangelo, when he would look at a block of marble, he would say the sculpture is already inside. All I have to do is chisel away the layers. I don't have to create something from the ground up. And I think dharma, or calling, is very much the same thing.[00:06:48] I bet that at some point in time, you have experienced your dharma. Like, you have lived up in a certain way. It may have been when you were a child. It may have been last week. It may be something that you're actively doing even at your job right now, but you're just not, you're not in tune with that.[00:07:03] You're not in touch with that. So what I think of one of the very first things that we can start to do is start to identify the bright spots, whether that be in a past role or in a current role, these moments that really made us come alive. I think the key here that I think that we sometimes miss, I know I did, was that when we think about things like purpose and dharma, we think about a job.[00:07:23] And so like in the book, for example, I tell the story of a woman named Mila, who really wanted to be a teacher. She was a project manager, but she really wanted to be a teacher, right? And she was frustrated because she couldn't, like, realistically, she had kids, her family relied on her health benefits, like the idea of leaving her job, going back and getting a teaching certificate was just not something that fit her practical life.[00:07:46] And she was frustrated by that. And I think a lot of people sort of find themselves in a similar position. But when she was able to peel back the layers and understand, well, what is it about teaching that I love, right? When I dig below the occupation and into the essence of teaching, what ultimately arrived for her was that she loved to help people grow.[00:08:05] And there was this emotional conversation she had with her mom, where her mom's like, Yeah, you've always loved helping people grow. Ever since you were a little kid, you were the kid who helped the kids on the other, on the block, like, learn how to ride bikes. It's the thing that's always been a part of you.[00:08:19] And once she sort of reconnected with that essence, all of a sudden, all these different ways of expressing that began to open up for her, right? Teaching was obviously one of them, but she could start to coach people at work. She could step into a lateral shift into HR and start growing people inside the company.[00:08:35] And all these options started to pop up for her. When that happens, Lucy, it's liberating because how many of us right now are like, Oh my God, like if I just took that other fork in the road in my career, then I would have ended in this job that would have been perfect for me right now. And I would be so much happier.[00:08:52] Well, the reality is that over 90% of us right now are looking for jobs, right? In 2023. Over 90% of us right now are looking for our next job, and what the data almost overwhelmingly shows is that we're going to jump to the next job, and within a few months, we're going to feel exactly the way we feel right now, right?[00:09:09] So I think with Dharma, with who I am, we're peeling underneath the occupation layer, and we're going into the essence layer. When you tap into that essence, you can start to figure out how to express that, and your world kind of opens up.[00:09:21] LM: It's amazing the way you describe it. I love the Michelangelo image, right? The block. And he says, I'm just repeating it back to you, but he says the sculpture is already there. It's just that you have to pull back the layers and that's exactly right. I think when people are able to do that, as you've described in your book.[00:09:40] LM: To me, that's the definition of health. I mean, health also includes having nice cholesterol levels, not having a heart attack, doing your cancer screenings, but health at its core is about awareness of our stories and how they live in our bodies, awareness of medical data, our own data, and the way our data is contextualized in the literature and then accepting the things we can't control, so other people, our genetic predisposition to breast cancer, and then finding agency where we can, because we can't control other people. We can't control certain genetic predispositions. We can't control the fact that we may be financially bound to stick with a job we're not fully actualized in, but people often have more control than they think.[00:10:28] And I think what you're saying, Suneel, is that part of the control and the agency we have, which is ultimately. To me, a part of definition of health is simply querying our own bodies and minds and asking ourselves, like, what is my passion? What am I here for? How do I feel when I'm doing something that gives me joy? And can I recreate that in other spheres of my life, whether it's at work or parenting and ultimately that feeds back onto our health. I mean… [00:10:55] SG: It does.[00:10:56] LM: During the pandemic, for example, I saw people every day who were experiencing physical manifestations of emotional distress. And some of it was burnout from caring, caregiving and parenting and living through a pandemic, just being a human.[00:11:08] But even now, I mean, people are wired and tired and they don't feel well. And so it's reassuring to me to hear someone like you talk about, to me, what is really the essence of health in your book. [00:11:24] SG: Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, who you may have crossed paths with at Harvard, really sort of, I think, Explains this nicely, which is like he has this phrase called the arrival fallacy and the arrival fallacy is basically this idea that like we're going to hit this moment where we've attained enough wealth, enough status in order to feel this lasting sense of joy on the inside.[00:11:47] And until then, we're willing to suffer. Until then, we're willing to sort of grit it out, grind it out, do whatever we need to do because we believe we're going to hit this moment where it's all going to have been worth it. And at some point in time, I think we all get wiser to this idea right? And I would argue that We're starting to realize that earlier in our lives. [00:12:05] I think Gen Z is asking difficult questions that older generations sometimes don't like because they're like we didn't ask those questions when we were your age, right? And they're, I think, very understandably saying, yeah, but you don't seem very happy. And we want to do things a little differently than you.[00:12:20] I mean, the country has gotten richer, we've become more productive, but we're also more lonely than ever before. Mental health issues have never been higher, right? We feel disconnected from one another. That's not necessarily sort of the train that I want to get on. And so to ask the difficult questions right now, and to your point, to be inside out about it, right, to peel back the layers, I think it's a very reasonable thing. And then the question I think becomes, well, then once I start to peel back those layers, how do I actually put it into practice, right? Because there's nothing more frustrating than understanding who you are, but showing up every day and feeling like you're walking in somebody else's path.[00:12:55] And what I try to do in the book is really get into those struggles again, like we may not feel like we have enough time. We may not feel like we have enough money. We may feel like we know exactly what it is, but we're scared of that. And so I wanted to tell like the everyday stories of people who were able to not necessarily even leave their jobs.[00:13:14] Like one of my favorite stories in the book is, is about a nurse who really wanted to be a writer. And her parents said, no, you can't be a writer. You're first of all, writing is not a profession. It's going to make money. You're not a, you're not a man, right? Like, and, and like, if you're a son, if you're a son, maybe, but like, as the daughter, no, you're not going to be a writer.[00:13:31] And so she got pushed into a different field and became an outstanding nurse. But one of the things that she realized is that she was able to bring her persona as a writer into her work of nursing. And one of the ways that she did that, it was through her patient paperwork. So, while most people like, try to get through, and you know this Lucy, try to get through the paperwork as quickly as possible, like put the clinical details in, she started to actually expand on those clinical details into like, who were these people?[00:13:56] What did they care about? Who do they love? What was their life like at home? What was their experience of being a human like? And she would start to pour her heart as a writer into these clinical patient forms to the point that like literally this paperwork was getting passed around the hospital like novels people loved reading it because it gave them a sense of purpose and what they were doing and so she was able to express this dharma as a writer through her occupation as a nurse and the point of it all is that oftentimes we think that in order to live our purpose we have to blow up our lives. We have to leave our jobs, right?[00:14:30] We have to move to a different place and become a painter or leave everything we have behind. Not true. And there's so many situations and stories in the book. We talk about sort of how Dharma doesn't have to be a separate path, but it can be a permutation of what you have right now. You don't have to leave everything behind. You can start to bring a new persona into where you are today.[00:14:49] LM: I love that Suneel, I think you're right that life happens in the mundane in a way, right? It's not in the big sort of huge moments. It's really in the everyday moments that sometimes we don't even know exist. It's just a tuning to the present. How did you get to be so wise? I mean, you're young and you talk a lot about burnout and failure.[00:15:12] I love that story you told about. You told your wife, I'm a failure and she's like, no, you're not a failure. And you're like, well, the New York Times says I'm a failure. And then you showed her the article about your talk about failure. And so like, what is your story? How did you get to the place where you are now writing and speaking and talking about these very soulful topics?[00:15:36] SG: Yeah, I mean, I think success is a lousy teacher, there's no doubt about that. It's wonderful, I'm not trying to downplay success, like, I think that I've had some success in my life and has been able to provide the sort of, I think, a life for my family, it's allowed me to sort of take care of my kids, and I'm very thankful for that.[00:15:54] And yet, if I look back at sort of where the learning really came, where the growth really came, it didn't come from success, it came from setbacks, it came from mistakes. It came from change when I coach sort of organizations and leaders today, and I asked them, what was the most important part of your career, right? Most important year of your career. Very rarely do they say like it was the winning year when I had the most profit or it was when I earned the biggest salary. Most of the time it's like something big happened, it was a big change and usually that change isn't positive. It's like it was something that got knocked back on their ass and they had to sort of learn and that changed everything for them.[00:16:32] But that was really meaningful. And I think I've had no shortage of I think those moments where I felt like I wanted something really badly and I put myself out there and it didn't happen. I think the learning for me, though, sort of came from sitting down and writing about that. Right? So, I think, if I'm being honest, like, I started writing because I was depressed.[00:16:55] I was feeling anxious. And I realized that I was dumping a lot of that on my wife. I was spending a lot of time talking to her about that, and I realized, and as, like, loving as, like, Lena is, I realized it was unfair for her. She was always listening, but it was unfair to just, like, almost, like, vomit my trauma on her.[00:17:13] And so I started to use the page, right? Literally sit down at my desk every morning and I started to write about these things that I felt like I was struggling with and searching for answers to that would do it every morning because the page always listened, no matter what it just listened. And I'd say 99% of what I've written in my life has ended up in like a trash bin, nut there were some pearls there were some little pearls that was able to string together along the way and eventually those pearls started becoming blog posts that became published articles. Eventually they became books and that's just kind of the thing like I think if you look hard enough There are these poor these pearls of wisdom.[00:17:55] I talk about this a lot in the book is like I think I was following sort of an outlook of resilience before right and now I feel like I'm following an outlook of growth and the difference between the two is that like with resilience, there can be a tendency sometimes to just like want to get back up right like pull yourself up by the bootstrap, let's get back up. But I think growth is getting back up, but also taking some time to understand. What did I learn. If my kid was in a similar situation? Well, how would I sort of help coach them through a situation like this? What would they learn from my mistakes? Taking such a taken like a reflective view on that.[00:18:35] Even just spending some time moments, right, to write about it, to learn about it, even if it's just for your benefit. Nothing you're gonna publish, but just something that you're gonna reflect on yourself I think can be the difference between cycling through the same mistake over and over again, and I think actually using a setback to create genuine.[00:18:56] LM: I love that. I have a comment and then a question. The comment is about the writing. Like you, I find writing to be very therapeutic. I find that I can really crystallize a lot of my thoughts. I mean, writing ultimately is about thinking. And when you're putting things on the page, it's clarifying to oneself about how you're thinking.[00:19:17] It also can disarm some sort of scary thoughts. I have found, like, when I've had depression symptoms or I've been anxious, when I journaled, I was a journaler from a young age. Just intuitively, I knew to write. When you look at the words, A day or two later, you realize that with time and with perspective, they're not so terrifying.[00:19:37] And so, I too find writing really therapeutic and I recommend it commonly to patients who are experiencing depression or anxiety or trauma as an adjunct to other sort of treatment modalities, but certainly kind of writing down our thoughts can help disarm them.[00:19:52] SG: Yeah. One of my favorite techniques is to write what I call sort of the if true, then pattern.[00:19:58] LM: Tell me about that.[00:19:59] SG: going a little bit deeper into the fear can be a really illuminating thing. So if I'm scared that I'm going to blow a presentation, right, I'll write that down. Like that's the thought inside my head, you're going to blow this presentation.[00:20:12] And then I kind of talk with the fear. I say, okay, let's pretend that happens. If true, then what? And then it's, you're not going to get the deal or you're not going to get the, you're not going to get the job or whatever it is. Right. And they say, if that's true, then what? Well, then you're, you're not going to have this role that you wanted.[00:20:27] If that's true, then what? Well, then you're going to blow up your career. And if that's true, then what? And I continue to just sort of go deeper down. And when it starts to make me realize is that underneath this surface level fear, all these sort of deep seated concerns that almost in all probability will not come to happen, but the other thing is that at the very bottom of that list Right when I really dig down to the root of it It always ends with something like well your wife is no longer going to love you, your kids are no longer gonna love you, right?[00:20:59] And I think to myself Wow, that's the deepest root of my fear and I actually have more control over that right now Then I do whether I get this presentation done like I can go give my kids a hug I can go tell my wife I love her. I can do that right now. What happens inside that presentation, I don't know. But I know the deepest fear, I can deal with right now.[00:21:21] LM: It's such a powerful point, Suneel, because I think all of us have at our core, the fear of not being loved or being worthy. Like shame and feeling excluded or not loved are like the deepest fears. And I think a lot of those fears come up in our childhood naturally, right? Like I think of life as this set of experiences and we're like a blank canvas when we're born and then you experience loss and challenge and hardship and dings on your self esteem.[00:21:57] And then we create this sort of network of connections in our minds. In fact, we call it the default mode network. It's a set of neural pathways in the front of our brains that basically are derived from a lot of pattern recognition so that we don't reinvent the wheel every time we come across a new scenario, right? Like, we lose that wonder and curiosity of childhood.[00:22:20] But we also gain some street smarts, but the downside of that default mode network in the front of our brains is that we can start to make assumptions about things and make connections and thought and behavioral patterns that actually aren't serving us at the time. In other words, you can have an experience as a child where you were terrified and felt vulnerable.[00:22:41] Maybe you weren't picked for the team or something. And then you wrote a story in your mind about why. And then the next time something happens to you that's like that, even in your adulthood, you might then go back to that sort of I'm not worthy narrative. So, this is a long way of asking you, about your childhood.[00:22:59] And now we're going to do like go deep here. Like, I love that pinned tweet on your Twitter feed. I guess it's called X now, about your mom. And I'm like, okay, there's a story there. First of all, her story and then your story of her being your mother. Someone says to her, “go back to your country.” And she says, this is my country.[00:23:17] And then I think the man says, get out of my kitchen. She says, this is my kitchen. And then there she is in all of her glory on time magazine, telling her story. Tell me about like growing up in your family. What was her story? How did that affect your story? And then your telling of it to yourself and then the experience of fear and vulnerability, like you just described,[00:23:37] SG: So, mom grew up on the border of India and Pakistan, right? When it was all one big country, when it was India. When the country split, during partition, was one of the bloodiest conflicts that humanity has ever known and she was part of that. She was in, she was right in the mix of it and their family fled.[00:23:56] She ended up in a refugee camp as a kid, very little running water, no electricity, but she decided that she was going to teach herself how to read. And she felt like that was going to be sort of her path out of poverty. And so she did. And she knew she had enough foresight even back then to know that like English was sort of the language that she would have to learn if she wanted to get herself to the United States because that was her dream. And so she started reading and the first book that she read from cover to cover was a story about Ford Motor Company because Ford Motor Company was literally the Google of its day.[00:24:30] The big, it was the big company. Everybody knew about it, right? If you were rich and you were driving sort of a Ford car, even around sort of certain parts of India and she would see that and that's what she wanted. And she wanted to be an engineer, as well, and she set her heart on that, and it was a very unlikely dream because people from her country, especially women, that period of time were destined for the kitchen, right?[00:24:53] And I mean, the best case scenario for her as told to her by some of the other people in her village was Find a rich man, find a wealthier man, somebody who isn't in poverty, and that's your path out. She wanted more, like she wanted to express herself. And so she studied hard and people got behind her, her parents got behind her, they saved every rupee that they had.[00:25:13] She was able to get on a boat to eventually the United States. She got a scholarship to Oklahoma State University. The day after she graduates, she finds herself to Detroit, Michigan. She applies for her dream job. There's a lot there. There's another story there. But she gets it. And in 1967, the reason Time Magazine wrote about her is because she became Ford Motor Company's first female engineer.[00:25:34] Ford Motor Company had thousands of engineers on staff at that point in time. Not a single one of them was a woman. And so here she is, this woman who tends to dress in saris, and she cooks and eats mainly Indian food back at home, and she is now amongst this, like, sea of mainly white men who are doing this job, and she finds a way to sort of fit in, or I shouldn't even say finds a way to fit in, she finds a way to be herself in a very different environment.[00:25:58] And, and I think that for me as a kid growing up in almost the opposite situation. I'm an Indian kid now growing up in America. I live in suburban Michigan. Everything is compared to my mom. We lived in a pretty, we lived in a three bedroom house, but like it was a night and day difference from the conditions that she grew up in.[00:26:17] It was the equivalent of a silver spoon in my mouth and the fact that I could eat every single night. I think that for me, what. I've learned about my mom and what I've learned about, I think other leaders who I spend time studying and I think admiring who have done difficult things is I think that the thing that holds a lot of us back are the words, “I'm not ready.”[00:26:40] Right? Like, I'm not ready to, to run with that thing. I'm not ready to step into that role. I'm not ready to speak my mind. I'm not ready. And I think the confusion sometimes is in believing that the people who did difficult things, my mom included, is that they were somehow ready to do what they did, but they weren't, right?[00:27:01] I call this the game of now, in my book, versus the game of someday, right? The game of someday is you wait for courage. You summon up enough courage, and once you actually have enough courage, you take action. And I think that's the way that most of us behave. There is another game, and that's the game of now, which is that instead of waiting for courage in order to take action, you just take action, and you let courage catch up along the way.[00:27:27] And I think the thing that I've learned is that it almost always does. If you just say like I'm gonna go do that thing courage will come even begrudgingly courage will be like, okay. I'm with you, right? That's the thing I learned about her story is that it wasn't the story of a little girl in a refugee camp who said f*ck it all I'm gonna go do this thing. It was more a story of a scared person who said I want this really badly and I'm scared And I'm going to do it anyway.[00:27:58] LM: that is a huge lesson. And I wonder how she expressed that. I mean, you told me in so many words, but like. Did she talk about like the lack of courage? Did she talk about her fear and just doing it despite having the courage or did she just model it? Was it the kind of thing you talked about as a kid?[00:28:17] SG: Not as a kid, no. I think as a kid, I had very surface level conversations with my mom. I marveled at her story, I marveled at who she was, but I didn't really dig into the how. If there's anything that I felt as a kid, I felt like kind of almost insecure because here was a parent and I have a brother who's done amazing things as well and my father's an immigrant too.[00:28:40] And so I sort of, I felt like I kind of came from this really brave family and I felt insecure because I actually didn't feel all that brave. I just didn't. And, and that made me feel bad because it was just, I felt like, wow, like, gosh, I'm surrounded by all these incredibly courageous people and I'm not one of them.[00:28:58] But. I began to realize over time, more from the stories that I would dig into, more from hearing about what it was like at Oklahoma State University when she was sitting in her dorm alone, right? What was that sort of like for her because she didn't eat meat and she couldn't go to the cafeteria because she was a vegetarian?[00:29:17] What was that like for her? And I think when you dig into people's stories and you get beyond this happened and this happened and you just simply start to ask the question of like, what was that like for you? And that's when you start to get insights, but I didn't start asking those questions until I was a teenager or maybe even in college when I would come home and have conversations with her.[00:29:35] And the thing about it, Lucy is like, I love that question now. Like I host a documentary series where I travel around the world and I meet with all these leaders who've done crazy things. And I almost always dig into less of what they did, but what were they feeling in those moments along the way?[00:29:54] LM: It's the essence of who people are. Right? Suneel, I can't thank you enough for joining me on the podcast. You are such a bright light and I can't wait to share your book more widely and to reread it. And I just thank you so much for your pearls of wisdom and for acknowledging that you're a work in progress too. [00:30:13] I think that we're never done. We're never done in the process of self discovery and then bringing our best selves to our relationships, to our work. And so I appreciate the humility that you offer as well. So thank you.[00:30:26] SG: Thanks, Lucy. It's so good to be here.[00:30:35] LM: Thank you all for listening to Beyond the Prescription. Please don't forget to subscribe, like, download, and share the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you catch your podcasts. I'd be thrilled if you liked this episode to rate and review it, and if you have a comment or question, please drop us a line at info@lucymcbride.com. The views expressed on this show are entirely my own and do not constitute medical advice for individuals. That should be obtained from your personal physician. Get full access to Are You Okay? at lucymcbride.substack.com/subscribe
The arrival fallacy is a concept that's very prevalent in medicine. Coined by Tal Ben-Shahar, it refers to the illusion of happiness that we think we'll experience when we arrive at a completed goal or achievement (spoiler: it doesn't work like that). In medicine in particular, this is reinforced with lots of delayed gratification and long training periods with limited free time and low pay. We think that finally achieving the next level (whether it's residency, fellowship, or attending, receiving a bonus, a raise, etc.) will instantly make our lives better, because we'll have more money and more control over our schedule. We constantly look for “the light at the end of the tunnel” to get ourselves through years of grueling assignments and shifts. But a lot of the time we reach these specific benchmarks – or, we “arrive” – and it's not at all how we thought it would be. Gertrude Stein was right when she said, “There's no there, there.” How does the arrival fallacy come into play when we reach attending status and start pulling in a whole new pay grade? Let's examine that… Looking for a comprehensive financial platform for doctors, by doctors that will help you to secure your financial future? Make sure to check out HelloAttend.com
If you find that you never actually let yourself enjoy the success you've created, you have likely fallen prey to a term called arrival fallacy. It's a cycle of belief that can be challenging to opt out of, but the good news is we can learn to work with its presence, and I'm showing you how this week. Discover how arrival fallacy often shows up for interior design business owners and why we continue to participate in it, even when we know it doesn't serve us. Hear what happens when you acknowledge the existence of arrival fallacy in your goal-setting process, and my tips for beginning to work with it, rather than against it. Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.desicreswell.com/46
Let's dive into some psychoanalysis and "get heady" with our good friend Lacan. Josh offers a new angle on the ravel metaphor by introducing us to the "quilting point", all leading to the question: how do we avoid the Arrival Fallacy? Be sure to play along and tap through the links here in the show notes!Mentioned in the episode: What Is The Quilting Point? Article (with referenced photo of red couch) The Son of Man painted by Rene Magritte Quilting Point Youtube video Lacan's Concept of the Phallus 152. The Gang Writes A Creed Ravel Episode Support us: Join our Patreon community and buy us a drink at patreon.com/ravelpod for as little as $3/mo! Submit a voicemail by calling 601-55RAVEL (601-557-2835) or submit a voice memo to the inbox at theravelpod@gmail.com! Take a minute to drop us a 5-star rating and a 1-2 sentence review on Apple Podcasts and Spotify! Follow on Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok at @ravelpod! Credits: Theme Song: In Full Color by Louie Zong on Spotify and Bandcamp Artwork: Yarn and Ravel by Dixie Lee Henning @dixieleedraws Editing/Sound Design by Stephen Henning Social Media by Josh Lieuallen Certified Organic benediction by Reverend Emily Rettinghouse, MDiv ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Do your achievements feel hollow? Success not as satisfying as it used to be? You've worked tirelessly to achieve your goals, convinced that reaching them would bring you happiness. But once you get there...the joy is fleeting and you're left wondering "Is this it?" Welcome to the world of arrival fallacy, a perfectionism trap that convinces us overachievers to tie our self-worth to external milestones and go on a miserable never-ending chase of enough. Inside this episode is the solution: Uncovering what's motivating you and that satisfaction is not a box to be checked off.If you want to feel as excellent as your life looks, you gotta check out my 1-1 coaching for perfectionists, The AcceleratorWhen you join The Accelerator, you'll get instant access to rich resource library of neuroscience-backed tools designed to help you triple your progress in half the time, leverage your strengths and create confidence that's bigger than Dolly Parton's hair with on-demand masterclasses, private podcasts, journaling exercises, playbooks, meditations and more!Plus, with concierge text coaching and one-on-one private sessions, you'll never feel alone in your extraordinary pursuit of excellence.Join The Accelerator today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/accelerator Inside This Episode You'll Discover:00:00:00-Introduction and The Perfectionist's Guide00:01:10-The Growth of Change vs. Allowing00:01:59-CLG's Journey 00:03:20-The Fear Factor00:04:05-The Danger Zone00:05:09- Phantom Promise of Moving the Goalposts00:06:34-The Unconscious Motivation00:08:01-Arrival Fallacy Examples00:09:10-The Power of Awareness00:10:11-Perfectionism Trap00:11:22-Cracking the Code To Perfectionism00:12:19-The Change of Allowing00:14:09-Self Awareness00:15:01-Why You Deserve Better Professional Fulfillment
“Arrival fallacy” is the dissatisfaction people often feel after attaining a goal. In this faith-building message, Ps. Jon gives keys on how to avoid spiritual arrival fallacy in the process of going after everything God has for us.
“Arrival fallacy” is the dissatisfaction people often feel after attaining a goal. In this faith-building message, Ps. Jon gives keys on how to avoid spiritual arrival fallacy in the process of going after everything God has for us.
Do you struggle to enjoy the journey? Are you telling yourself that you can't feel safe and secure until your debt is paid off? Do you believe that you will finally have financial status when you're making six figures? Are you someone who is delegating your happiness and purpose to the achievement of a future goal or until the acquisition of a certain item? If so, you could be falling victim to the arrival fallacy, which is the false assumption that once we reach a goal or milestone we will experience lasting happiness and fulfillment. In this week's episode of The Money Love Podcast, we are diving deep into the arrival fallacy. We are breaking down what it is, how it rears its ugly head within our finances, why our human brains fall victim to it, and also Paige will be sharing her five best tips to help you enjoy the journey, rather than being focused on the destination. I can guarantee this is something that you've done in the past (or are even doing now with a current goal) and this episode will be a needed reminder that happiness is available to you now. Enjoy! START HERE: FREE MASTERCLASS: Why You Impulse Shop & How To Stop Get Paige's Money Recommendations Work with Paige: Join Overcoming Overspending HERE Explore Private Coaching with Paige Where you can find Paige online: Website: https://www.paigepritchard.com IG & TikTok: @overcoming_overspending Subscribe to the YouTube Channel
Welcome back to Kindful the podcast. In this episode I talk about the concept of 'Arrival Fallacy', which is "the illusion that once we make it, once we attain our goal or reach our destination, we will reach lasting happiness,” according to positive psychology expert Tal Ben-Shahar, who came up with the term. I share some of my own personal experiences with seeking happiness, self worth and validation outside of myself, and in future outcomes and achievements. I talk about how this topic relates to many of the core principles of mindfulness, and how I'm learning instead to find joy in the journey of life. I hope you find this conversation helpful and insightful. Thank you for being here and being you. Resources: The Mindful Map 21 day mindfulness program Kindful co. resources and offerings Join our newsletter Other links: Kindful YouTube channel Kindful co. Instagram Hannah's TikTok and Instagram Led by Life podcast, co-hosted by Hannah and Rafaela --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/herewithhannah/message
In this episode, we delve into the importance of understanding the times and seasons of our lives. From delayed gratification to the arrival fallacy, we unpack the essence of living a fulfilling life and how to avoid getting stuck in a destination mindset. Pastor Emmanuel Adewusi of CCCG sheds light on the benefits of waiting on God's timing, how to deal with the fear that often comes with change, and more. Tune in to hear our conversation!About Pastor EPastor Emmanuel Adewusi is, among many things, a husband, a father, an author, a recording artist, and a child of God. Alongside his wife, Pastor Ibukun Adewusi, he pastors Cornerstone Christian Church Of God. He was called into ministry with a mandate “to bring restoration and transformation to all by teaching, preaching and demonstrating the Gospel of Jesus Christ.” He has a passion for the full counsel of the Word of God, fellowship with the Holy Spirit and being under spiritual authority.Visit EmmanuelAdewusi.orgOn IG @e.adewusi On Instagram/HearMeOutPod.CastYouTube.com/TheHearMeOutPodProduced and Recorded with The Oxymoron Podcast Networksong: The Jazz Hop café - CrazyJazz/Happiness
S3 E2 Expectancy. Gifts. Open handedness & Hope.
ProspectiveDoctor | Helping you achieve your medical school dreams | AMCAS | MCAT
Dr. Erkeda DeRouen talks to Dr. Mary Leung, a full-time physician who specializes in oncology and hematology. She is also a certified life coach. They talk the signs of burnout and how to overcome it, along with imposter syndrome. [01:03] Introducing Dr. Mary Leung [02:51] Why Oncology and Hematology? [06:02] Recognizing Burnout [11:14] The Arrival Fallacy [15:17] Imposter Syndrome [17:30] Dr. Mary Leung's Advice to Pre-Meds and Medical Students Signs of Burnout Anyone is susceptible to experiencing burnout. It can feel physically, emotionally, and spiritually draining—almost as if you're running on an empty tank. You can start to become cynical when you lose sight of your purpose. The most important piece is to recognize when you feel burnt out. Take a step back to find out why you feel this way. Burnout is by no means your fault, it happens to all of us. But it is a sign that you need to take better care of yourself. A life coach can help you address burnout by reminding you of your strengths and passion, while suggesting ways to address the stressors in your life. What is Arrival Fallacy? Arrival fallacy is this cognitive bias that you will become happy after achieving a certain goal. In medicine, you become eager to reach the next steps, believing that it will guarantee happiness. That kind of bliss doesn't last very long. In no time, you'll be looking for the next milestone. Instead of perpetuating this false belief, students and physicians should learn to enjoy the process. You can be happy even during challenging times. Live in the present moment and savor both the good and bad. Dealing with Imposter Syndrome High-achieving individuals often believe that they are not deserving of their success, despite all the hard work they put in. It's common to have self-doubt. To address imposter syndrome, be mindful of how you speak to yourself. Remind yourself that it's okay to recognize your efforts. Treat yourself the way you would treat a friend: with compassion and encouragement. You can reach Dr. Mary Leung through her LinkedIn or send her an email at shiningwithgratitudemd@gmail.com. Check out her website for more resources. To learn more about how MedSchoolCoach can help you along your medical school journey, visit us at Prospective Doctor. You can also reach us through our social media: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MedSchoolCoach Dr. Erkeda's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doctordgram/ YouTube: www.youtube.com/@ProspectiveDoctor
Subtitle: What is the fantasy fallacy and how can it affect us on our fertility journey and after we become parents? Description: We fall victim to the arrival fallacy when we forbid ourselves to feel happy until we accomplish that *one* thing, but oftentimes, even when the goal is achieved, we still have trouble feeling complete. In this podcast, we discuss the prevalence of fantasy fallacy in our society and methods that can help us find happiness in our present. Thanks for listening. If you want to go deeper with this material, I highly encourage you to join our group coaching program and course Conscious Conceptions. You'll find community, and a blend of mindset work and strategy from functional and traditional chinese medicine to help you feel your best on the path to parenthood. You'll have weekly access to me to ask ALL of your fertility and pregnancy questions. We now offer sliding scale pricing so that this knowledge is accessible to any woman on the planet that has a need. Go to FertileMindsRadio.com to get on our email list for the next opening in March 2023.
Have you ever had a big goal in mind, and then once you achieve your goal, your happiness doesn't last very long? You even become a little sad? That is part of the arrival fallacy! Thanks to Sam Proton and Danny D for the music! Reference: https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-arrival-fallacy-6561079
If you struggle with... A) Getting ALLLLL the way to your ultimate weight loss goal. B) Sustaining your weight loss results once you've achieved them (and doing so with ease). C) or Both. This episode is for you. You'll learn: The Arrival Fallacy Why it matters for your weight loss goal The 2 things you need to know in order to avoid falling into the 'arrival fallacy' trap What needs to change in order to arrive ALL the way to your goal (*especially, if you're an emotional eater) What needs to change in order to maintain your desired weight loss results once you've achieved them. LISTEN NOW
Ben-Shahar says that often people who experience the arrival fallacy start off unhappy, and reach for a goal that is supposed to cure their sadness. When they find that success doesn't fix their unhappiness, not only are they disappointed, but may end up feeling hopeless and depressed. Often, the arrival fallacy only makes unhappiness and mental states worse.RESOURCES: https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-arrival-fallacy-6561079https://sketchyideas.co/arrival-fallacy/WATCH: www.youtube.com/juliemericaGET A MONTHLY NOTE FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comBUY SOME MERCH: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/make-your-damn-bed-podcast?ref_id=27657TUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcastOR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcastThis show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get 10% off your first month of online therapy at www.betterhelp.com/makeyourbed The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Is there a part of you that believes that once you climb the mountain, you'll finally feel worthy? Or once you get the promotion at work, you'll finally feel secure? Or that you need to lose the weight in order to finally feel desirable? This common thought error, which is called the arrival fallacy, is shared by most humans. And it can real mess with our enjoyment of life — and even make it harder to achieve our goals. But don't worry. In today's bonus episode, I show you a simple process for recognizing and reversing this thought error. We'll also explore the juicy goodness that choosing to feel (worthy, etc.) right now can create in your life.Holiday Survival Workshops and Breathwork SessionsClick here to view the calendar of events and register Life/Health Coaching With SarahTo schedule a coaching discovery call with Sarah, you can do any of the following:DM me on InstagramSchedule directly on my calendarEmail me through the contact form on my website
Here is a rewind episode of one of our favorites. “Someday when I become a resident, it will be better. I'll be making money. “ “One day, as an attending, things will be so much better than they are right now. No one will be able to tell me what to do!” “When the kids are a little bit older, things will be easier.” I am here to tell you that if you think when you accomplish your next goal life will automatically be better, you are likely suffering from an arrival fallacy. Here is how to snap out of the matrix, and find the reality you really want today. Love the show? Heck, want to work with me? See how we can here! www.thephysicianphilosopher.com/coaching
What is the arrival fallacy?The arrival fallacy is the false assumption that once you reach a goal, you will experience lasting happiness. Many people become less happy after attaining something they have been striving towards. They were happier during the journey and less at the destination.Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, a Harvard-trained expert on positive psychology, created the term itself. Dr. Ben-Shahar says, “the arrival fallacy is the illusion of reaching a destination or goal and realizing that the achievement doesn't make you as happy as you thought it would.” He then adds, “while most people can predict what might may them happy, they usually misjudge the preconceived intensity and overall duration of said happiness.”It makes sense that when you're on a journey to some big audacious goal, from a big project launch to becoming a doctor to having a child to early retirement, you believe at the end of it, you'll reach an enduring level of happiness. Once people arrive at a goal and realize the happiness doesn't last, they set another bigger, better goal, constantly seeking something they believe will arrive at lasting happiness. And it doesn't. That's the fallacy.People experiencing the arrival fallacy might also mask their unhappiness that increases after their goal is achieved. This concept is often called “escalation of commitment” and is a human behavior pattern where someone facing negative consequences from a decision, action, or situation continues the behavior instead of altering their course. They are escalating their commitment to some path, even as they learn it might not be the path for them. People mistakenly confuse happiness with reaching an achievement. Happiness is a lifelong journey. It's not one achievement. It's not one place you arrive at and then stay at. The insight here is that happiness is a journey, not a destination. Is the arrival fallacy affecting your happiness? Maybe. Probably. If you've reached a goal and you're not feeling continued happiness from it, then you're likely experiencing the arrival fallacy.You may feel incredibly happy after achieving a big goal, and that's awesome and hopefully the case. We don't mean to imply that working hard towards a goal can't create happiness. The arrival fallacy and what we want to help you avoid is the idea that achieving that big goal will create enduring happiness. It will create a short-term dopamine hit of happiness, and you need to design a life where you get those dopamine hits on an ongoing basis. Happiness is a lifelong journey, and we feel happiness through our relationships, community, and daily life efforts.Most of the ways you can fight the arrival fallacy involve changing your mindset. Of course, mindset is the solution to so many things in life, so we're not surprised by this!What can you do to combat the arrival fallacy and improve your happiness?Identify the core issue you believe is making you less happy or unfilled, and make sure the goal indeed corrects that.Do your research. Know what you're getting into. Talk to other people.Adjust your expectations. Based on the research you've done, adjust your expectations. Go in “eyes wide open,” and stop telling yourself you'll be so happy when xyz happens. It's not an arrival fallacy if you know what you're getting into and you're not expecting immediate and lasting happiness from a career path. On the contrary, setting your expectations too high creates more unhappiness and can lead to depression and other types of malaise. Set smaller, more practical goals. Enjoy the efforts and journey you're taking on the path of something versus expecting the final arrival on the path to be what creates happiness.Appreciate that happiness is your life journey, not the destination. Envision your future. Ask yourself what you'll do after you reach a goal that will continue to make you happy?Create new goals. Setting goals and then starting the journey to achieve them can make you happy. But let's bring that back full circle, as you need to understand the arrival fallacy so you can set your expectations on how you'll feel as you accomplish these new goals. Things take time. Be patient.Handle hard better. This is a super short and inspiring talk from Duke's women's basketball coach Kara Lawson. She says life will “never get easier; what happens is you handle hard better. What happens if you become someone who handles hard stuff better, not someone waiting for the easy.” Understanding the arrival fallacy helps you to handle hard better. Top 3 takeaways:Happiness is a journey, not a destination. Invest in that journey and design your life to optimize what truly makes you happy.Money, or early retirement, won't magically make you happy, but it can give you the freedom to design a life filled with more of the things that do make you happy.Show References:Article: Arrival Fallacy: How to be happierDuke Basketball Coach Kara Lawson Video: Handle Hard BetterBook: Designing Your Life: How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful LifeBook: The Pathless Path: Imagining a new story for work and lifeFriends on FIRE Episode #140 - Maggie's early retirement “bucket list” plans (part 4 of 5)Friends on FIRE Episode #158 - Control your lifestyle to find financial freedomFriends on FIRE Episode #144 - Inflation is out of control! What is happening?---Follow friends on FIRETwitterInstagramFacebookLinkedInLeave us a voicemail or text us: 404-981-3370eMail us at: friendsonfiremm@gmail.comVisit our website: www.friendsonfire.org---Other LinksMaggie's Blog: Mostly Minimal LifeMike's Book: Your New Relationship with Money
Arrival Fallacy. It is a real thing. I'll be happy when.....I'll feel confident when...So what is it, and how can we get over this "always wanting what is next?"Join our Facebook Group! Find me on InstagramCheck out our PINS on PinterestAnd YES - I'm on TikTok!
Arrival Fallacy. It is a real thing. I'll be happy when.....I'll feel confident when...So what is it, and how can we get over this "always wanting what is next?"Join our Facebook Group! Find me on InstagramCheck out our PINS on PinterestAnd YES - I'm on TikTok!
We talk about why we observe the birthday of our spiritual teachers, discuss the challenge of the “arrival fallacy,” share a hack about creating more kitchen counter space, and tackle a listener question about being a happiness bully. Get in touch: @gretchenrubin; @elizabethcraft; podcast@gretchenrubin.com Get in touch on Instagram: @GretchenRubin & @LizCraft Get the podcast show notes by email every week here: http://gretchenrubin.com/#newsletter Get the resources and all links related to this episode here: http://happiercast.com/396 Leave a voicemail message on: 774-277-9336 For information about advertisers and promo codes, go to happiercast.com/sponsors Want to be happier in 2022? Order Gretchen Rubin's book The Happiness Project to see how she approached the question, “How can I be happier?” and start a Happiness Project of your own. Happier with Gretchen Rubin is part of ‘The Onward Project,' a family of podcasts brought together by Gretchen Rubin—all about how to make your life better. Check out the other Onward Project podcasts—Do The Thing, Side Hustle School, Happier in Hollywood and Everything Happens with Kate Bowler. If you liked this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and tell your friends! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Welcome to my 3rd solo episode! Today I discuss a topic that is deeply meaningful to me: the Arrival Fallacy.More importantly, we will talk about overcoming the arrival fallacy and the implications this has for a more successful personal & financial life.Summary:- my past and where I went wrong (1:03)- arrival fallacy definition (7:24)- the role of dopamine (10:35)- 5 ways to overcome the arrival fallacy (14:25)- a tale of 2 doctors (20:51)- spending on what you value (23:14)This episode is brought to you by taxpay.ca (12:56). Taxpay is a platform I've been using where you or your accountant can schedule all of your tax payments. This includes personal tax, payroll remittances, corporate tax payments, GST & HST. Taxpay can help you to simplify your life, forget the stress of taxes, eliminate potentially hefty penalties, all so that you can focus on more important things in life. You can sign up for taxpay.ca today using the discount code "beyondmd" on the pricing page to get 6 months free.Taxpay website: https://taxpay.ca/user/accountantArticle with screenshots to guide set up: https://taxpayca.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/9043147171860
What if some of the emotional and mental angst we can experience in life is due to the feeling that we should be somewhere else by now? Let's address this Arrival Fallacy and learn to lighten up and relax! --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/craig-westhoff/support
What if some of the emotional and mental angst we can experience in life is due to the feeling that we should be somewhere else by now? Let's address this Arrival Fallacy and learn to lighten up and relax! --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/craig-westhoff/support
Many of us have fallen into the trap of arrival fallacy, or the belief that you'll finally have lasting happiness once you achieve a specific goal our outcome. Yes, reaching goals can make us feel happy for a while, but eventually that becomes your new baseline and life goes back to "normal." Learning to enjoy the journey which is going to include both ups and downs will lead to more happiness now. Tune in each week to learn more on how to grow your wealthy mindset! Imagine your life when you have the financial knowledge to create wealth so you can practice medicine on your own terms. Please subscribe and leave a review on your favorite Podcasting platform. You can learn more about Elisa at her website or follow her on social media.Website: www.GrowYourWealthyMindset.comInstagram https://www.instagram.com/GrowYourWealthyMindsetFacebook https://www.facebook.com/ElisaChianghttps://www.facebook.com/GrowYourWealthyMindsetYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/WealthyMindsetMDLinked In: www.linkedin.com/in/elizabeth-chiang-0582a432
Taylor unpacks what's known as the "Arrival Fallacy" which is the belief that once you accomplish a specific goal you'll attain a sense of lasting gratification. However, we know that this is often not the case and that we're left feeling empty and lost after we complete big goals. So, what do we do? Episode Highlights Include: - Identify your "If-Then" statements. - Striving for the simple goal of bettering yourself. - Push because you enjoy it, not because you'll arrive at some magical place in the future. - Understand that you'll never be content. - Three actionable ways to combat the Arrival Fallacy. For more information, resources, and guidance visit www.thomasendurancecoaching.com. **SUPPORT THE PODCAST** Visit https://info.insidetracker.com/enduranceminded to take advantage of 25% off of the entire InsideTracker store! If you're a coach, trainer, registered dietitian, or other health and wellness practitioner, InsideTracker Pro is your gateway to offering your clients InsideTracker -- the truly personalized nutrition and performance system that's trusted by hundreds of elite athletes and top coaches in strength and endurance sports. With InsideTracker Pro, you can earn revenue, enjoy discounts, and help your clients perform better than ever. Visit https://info.insidetracker.com/enduranceminded to sign up today. ***** Access Nutrients has created a supplement designed to assist with better absorption of zinc, iron, calcium, and magnesium. This is a heavily researched and science-backed supplement, that helps to break down the anti-nutrient phytate. Phytate is present on all beans, grains, nuts, and seeds and any product made from these foods (pasta, rice, chickpeas, nut butters, whole wheat flour, cereals, etc). Without the enzyme, the above-mentioned micronutrients are largely unavailable for absorption, leading to deficiencies. Without enough iron, our body struggles to transport oxygen. Without zinc, our body's immune system is impaired and many enzymatic processes cannot function normally. This enzyme has already helped a number of athletes with better performance, improved energy, anemia, fatigue, and other conditions. Have a read through the research on the site for more info, but trust us when we say that this enzyme could be a game-changer for athletes when it comes to optimizing performance! Visit www.accessnutrients.org and use code THOMASENDURANCE for 25% off of your order.
Today we are going to talk about one of the biggest issues facing brides- the arrival fallacy. The arrival fallacy is the mental and emotional illusion that when you arrive, once you get there, achieve the goal, and arrive at your wedding day, you will have lasting happiness. This is why so many brides and couples are willing to suffer through a tough wedding planning journey. In this episode, I offer 3 ways to combat the arrival fallacy so that you feel connected and understood as you head down the aisle. What you'll learn from this episode: Making each stop of the wedding process meaningful Why you should revisit your values How to manage expectations The importance of making your wedding enjoyable Featured on the show: Follow me on Instagram to learn more about navigating your wedding with grace and ease: https://www.instagram.com/karaghassabeh/ Check out The Bridal Prep Academy: https://karamaureen.com Let's connect on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KaraMaureenBridalCoaching
Today I share some of my favorite quotes as well as talk about the Arrival Fallacy.
This episode we discuss Arrival Fallacy - the illusion that once we “make it,” once we attain our goal or reach our destination, we will achieve lasting happiness. The term was coined by Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D. in his book, Happier. We discuss: What Arrival Fallacy is, and it's distant relative, Summit Syndrome The Happiness Quadrants (and where you want to spend most of your time) Rat race Hedonism Nihilism Happiness Quadrant Tips to enjoy the journey, including Stop saying “I'll be happy when [x]...” Start lighting it up Focus on what's going right Celebrate along the way Concentrate on your relationships Quotables “You often feel tired, not because you've done too much, but because you've done too little of what sparks a light in you.” -Alexander den Heijer Start lighting it up! Today, if you don't know what your hobbies are, start dreaming. As long as you know you're going in the right direction, you're going to get there. If we can be mindful of those pleasant moments and really savor them, they can help carry us along as we endure unpleasantries. We can learn how to absorb positive experiences. What we really need is to be able to soak in stuff that's more positive. There's so much going right all the time. So we celebrate along the way. We can mourn along the way as well. All those things together will help us to find happiness in our journey. The number one predictor of happiness is the quality tie we spend with people we care about and who care about us. (From Tal Ben-Shahar) Happiness is the journey, not the destination. (Attributed to a lot of people including Ralph Waldo Emerson, Buddha, & Mahatma Gandhi) References: Happiness Quadrants Alexander den Heijer Ben-Shahar, Tal. Happier. New York, McGraw-Hill, 2007 Rick Hanson, Ph.D. Wellness 911- You've Arrived: Why Aren't You Happier? (Dinsmore, Amanda MD; Cazier, Laura MD; Morrison, Kendra DO. Emergency Medicine News: April 2022 - Volume 44 - Issue 4 - p 30. doi: 10.1097/01.EEM.0000827728.91293.5a)
Hi Navigators! We have a remarkable guest to introduce to you all today. Jillian Rigert, DMD, MD, joins Catherine and Francis to explore an array of topics, including Jillian's experience with an eating disorder and her recovery. She shares her relationship with anorexia nervosa as it relates to her identity, and how psychological and cognitive distortions and conditions like arrival fallacy, imposter syndrome, confirmation bias, and burnout all impacted her journey – both in difficult and uplifting ways. Jillian is a current trainee in Martha Beck's Wayfinder Life Coach Program, and has formal training in dentistry, medicine, and oral medicine. She is an Air Force Veteran, research fellow in Radiation Oncology, blogger and buddying activist on topics including anti-diet culture and eating disorder recovery. She brings these experiences to this platform in profound and insightful ways. And as a bonus, she introduces us all to her dog Reece! We hope there are pieces in this conversation which feel relatable and comforting, and of course, we thank Jillian for her time, energy, and intellect. Enjoy!CW: eating disorders, eating disorder recovery, eating disorder behaviors, suicidal ideation, discussion about weight-stigma and BMI, weight bias, military culture, medical bias and culture
Invincible Career - Claim your power and regain your freedom
The past two weeks have been interesting and challenging. I was selected for jury duty service here in California, and I have a few weeks left in the trial. The process has been taking up most of the time I usually spend writing, recording my podcast, and working with my clients and community. As a result, I’m not entirely happy with my progress on the latest chapter of the book I’m writing. It’s about 80% of the way there, so I need more time to wrap it up before sharing the draft with you. So, instead, I will try something new this week! I’m frequently asked career-related questions across various platforms. Instead of answering there, I will share the questions and my answers with you here. By the way, if you would like to ask me a question about anything related to work, careers, interviews, etc., there are many ways you can do that:Reply to the weekly newsletter email and send me your question.Post your question in the comments section of an article. Send me an anonymous written question.Record an audio question, and you can have your voice included in an upcoming podcast episode!Note: Please let me know if you’d like to have your name included or if you prefer to remain anonymous. For example, I can disguise your voice in the podcast. Now, without further ado, let’s dive into the six questions below!Question 1“Has working remotely part-time or full-time enhanced your well-being?”Absolutely! I have been working primarily remote for more than 12 years now and full-time remote for more than six years.I used to commute 2–3 hours every day for my last corporate job. I was overweight, unhealthy, and unhappy. I didn't see my family much during the workweek.Once I went remote running my own business, I started working out more often and eating healthier — after I recovered and repurposed those 2–3 hours every day. I lost 40 lbs! If you check out my Instagram, you'll see that I'm still working out every day.I was also able to spend more time with my children and eat dinner with my family every night. I go for a walk and run with my wife almost every day. My mental and emotional health are so much better now.Anyone who has read the advice in my newsletter knows that I'm a huge fan of remote work. I coach clients to take control of their working lives so they can work where they want and when they want. It's a life-changing experience!Question 2“What job or profession is a lot less fun than people imagine?”I think many professions look more fun from the outside than they do on the inside. For example, I was a software/web/app designer for much of my career. My friends and family (who don’t work in tech) would frequently comment that my job must be “fun” because I just had to sit around and design stuff all day. I think they confused “design” with creating art, which I actually do enjoy quite a lot. But, I can tell you that the actual profession of software design isn’t all fun and laughs. It’s a ton of long hours, arguments over requirements and design decisions, endless revisions, tedious documentation, etc. Sure, there are some fun moments, but probably no more than other professions.Likewise, I think television shows have misled us into believing that the lives of doctors, police officers, and lawyers are a lot more exciting than they really are. My brother is a surgeon, so I know he isn’t having “fun” very often on the job. I used to be a police dispatcher, so I know that most of the job is boring and full of process and paperwork (briefly interrupted by rare moments of terror). I’m sure that many of us look at the lives of professional athletes, music artists, and actors and think, “That must be nice! I sure do wish I could get paid to play like that.” But, there’s a reason that many of them struggle with substance abuse, depression, and failed relationships. The professions aren’t as glamorous as they look from the outside. Question 3“What are the considerations before making a career change?”This is a tricky question to answer because I don’t know how significant the planned career change is. So, my first follow-up question would be, “What type of career change?” Obviously, a massive change will require more serious consideration and preparation. Do you know what you're getting into? You should talk to people in the career/profession you’re considering. Explore what the job is like by receiving training, shadowing someone, etc. I have some friends who have considered opening restaurants and bars. However, after spending a few days as a chef, they changed their minds. Do you need a financial cushion? Depending on the career change, you may need funds to bridge the gap while your new career is spinning up (i.e., before it provides enough income to support you). This is often the case if you quit your job to become an entrepreneur. It takes some time for a new business to provide a reliable and sufficient income stream. Will the career change require a lifestyle change? Are you prepared for that? For example, sometimes your commute or working hours will be pretty different when you change to a new profession. You should also be prepared for the impact it may have on your circle of friends. I lost quite a few “friends” when I left my tech career behind to become a leadership and career coach. Finally, what’s your backup plan if the career change doesn’t work out? Failure is a possibility, and it can happen. Hey, my tech startup failed, and I had to quickly come up with my Plan B to keep going. So, be prepared with a backup plan ahead of time (just in case). Question 4“What (if any) new careers are open to you if you are nearing 60?”Even though age discrimination is illegal and the law protects people age 40 or over, we all know it still happens. It’s a massive issue in tech, and I encountered it several times. Unfortunately, it’s hard to prove age discrimination. So, it’s wise to plan ahead and be ready for the inevitable slowdown in opportunities that used to flow your way when you were younger. I started planning my future as I approached my 40s because I could already see where things were going. I intentionally guided my career in a direction where my age would be viewed as an asset, not a liability (e.g., management, leadership, consulting). Some examples of pivoting into a second-act career:Successful actors become directors before they age out, and it’s too late (e.g., Ron Howard, Penny Marshall, Jodie Foster).Hot music artists start their own record label before they grow weary of touring (e.g., Jay Z, The Beatles, Dave Grohl).World-class athletes know when to hang it up and transition into coaching (e.g., Bill Russell, Martina Navratilova, Mike Ditka). Careers for older folks:Many older employees move into consulting when they feel their career slowing down within the walls of a corporation. People like me leave the corporate world, become coaches, and advise the next generation of leaders.Some people realize that they can’t be forced into “early retirement” if they start their own business and become their own boss. I know many business owners over the age of 60. My optometrist owned his practice and just retired this year when he was over 90! Teaching at a local school or college is a good option and lets you give back to the next generation. I’ve watched people retire from their first career and go into real estate. It’s a job that values your experience and connections. Writing is another career that is open to anyone, no matter their age. No one knows how old you are behind the keyboard! Finally, I know several people who indulged their artistic talent and became artists in their second-act careers. I interviewed one talented lady for my podcast. As you may have guessed, some of these second-act careers won’t pay as well as your first-act career did when you were younger. So, plan accordingly. I think you’ll enjoy this article; A new start after 60: ‘I became a psychotherapist at 69 and found my calling.’ You might find this one interesting, too.Question 5“How many careers did you have before your current one?”I guess it depends on how you define a “career.” I’ve had many different jobs in my life, but I wouldn’t classify any of the earlier ones as a career to which I dedicated a significant amount of my professional life.Before I became a leadership and career coach, I spent most of my professional life in one career in tech. I was a designer, design manager, design leader, product executive, and startup founder and CEO. But, I would put all of those jobs under the umbrella of my “tech career.”I will say that the idea of having one primary career for life is outdated. My professional life has changed considerably about every ten years. I would guess that many of you will change careers more than once in your lifetime, as well. Question 6“What do you do when your business direction is becoming more risky and you feel like your life is taking too long to get to where you want to be? Mildly bittersweet and having a lot of hindsight about my past life right now :(“One of my most popular articles ever was on this very topic. What does “too long” mean? Are you comparing yourself to someone else?The focus on “where you want to be” reveals what is known as the Arrival Fallacy. Many of us experience it at a few points in our lifetime. "Arrival fallacy is this illusion that once we make it, once we attain our goal or reach our destination, we will reach lasting happiness." — Tal Ben-ShaharWhen you dream about the destination and keep thinking that reaching it will be what makes you happy, you don’t enjoy your life along the way. I know this is easier said than done, but you need to enjoy the journey too. Too many people experience a letdown when they reach their big goal. They feel like, “Is this it? Shouldn’t I feel happier now?”Now, your comment about your business direction becoming “more risky” is a valid concern. My follow-up question is, “What do you mean by that?” You should continuously evaluate progress and how things are going. Sometimes, it is time to cut your losses and move on. But I don’t know enough to tell you if you’ve reached that point yet. So, what do you think? Do you enjoy these Q&A articles? Let me know!Again, feel free to comment on this article if you’d like to ask me a question. Thank you for reading Invincible Career®. This post is public so feel free to share it.By the way, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money on a premium subscription:📣 Recommending my newsletter on social media! It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.I’ll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, Reddit, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead at work and be happier in your job, but you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.comLarry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who hosts a private mastermind community for ambitious professionals with weekly challenges, office hours, and confidential support. If you’re interested in starting your own business or side hustle someday (or accelerating an existing one), check out his “Employee to Solopreneur” course (launching later this year).Larry lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice to help others take complete control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett. This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit newsletter.invinciblecareer.com/subscribe
Virgie and Laurie unpack harmful happiness myths like "the perfect body" that contribute to diet culture, and Laurie tells Virgie how the science of happiness can be used to fight them.Topics include: Harry & David Pears [01:20]City of Angels (1998) [03:54]The “Arrival Fallacy” [11:38]Hedonic Adaptation [17:50]Science of Happiness [20:38]The Tool of Self-Compassion [31:34]You can find more of Laurie's work on social media @lauriesantos or through her podcast ‘The Happiness Lab.' Follow @virgietovar and @transmitterpods to stay up to date on all things Rebel Eaters Club. And make sure to visit rebeleatersclub.com to download your Rebel Eaters Club starter pack!
A boozy episode for this wonderful Sunday — the life-saving "Holy Trinity" of brunch drinks, a tribute to (and a history of) mint juleps and The Kentucky Derby, and a reason why reaching your accomplishments doesn't feel as good as it should. Subscribe to Sunday Scaries newsletter: www.willdefries.substack.com Shop the Sunday Scaries Scented Candles: www.vellabox.com/sundayscaries Shop Sunday Scaries Merch: www.sunday-scaries.shop Support This Week's Sponsors Earlybird: www.earlybirdcbd.com (SCARIES for 20% off) Uncommon Goods: www.uncommongoods.com/scaries (15% off!) Follow Along Sunday Scaries on Twitter: www.twitter.com/sundayscaries Sunday Scaries on Instagram: www.instagram.com/sunday.scaries Will deFries on Twitter: www.twitter.com/willdefries Will deFries on Instagram: www.instagram.com/willdefries Credits Podcast artwork by Alfonso Ruiz and Tristan Pigott All music by Kevin MacLeod Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
It is time to reassess the feelings that we have surrounding success! We live in a goal-obsessed society but sometimes reaching that goal will not always automatically make you happy. If you expect to find happiness by attaining something, changing something, or being someone else, you're experiencing arrival fallacy. Connect with Crys ON IG! @cryssk BE SURE TO RATE/REVIEW and SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW On Instagram: @thetalkischicpodcast On Facebook: The Talk Is Chic Podcast On Twitter: @talkischicpod Email us: talkischicpod@gmail.com
Life is mysterious. We feel compelled to try to figure it out. Why am I here? Where am I going? Why is this happening to me? This week we'll seek some answers in the story of the turbulent life of Jacob, as recorded in the book of Genesis.
When will I ever be happy? Maybe if I just do this, accomplish that, then I will finally be successful. I have faced this constant confrontation so many times - whilst looking in the mirror, observing others, or simply just while trying to figure out "what's wrong with me". You are not alone. Join us in this episode as we not only discuss this topic at length to dissect it, but leave you with some great action steps on how to get change your thinking for the better. Show links: 018 | The Four Stages of Life: What it means to ”die empty” [https://rltstudios.podbean.com/e/018-the-four-stages-of-life-what-it-means-to-die-empty/] Free 5 step budget (Subscribe to newsletter) [https://rltstudios.com] Show Poll [https://rltstudios.com/show24] RLT Studios Official Blog [https://rltstudios.com/blog-1] Real Life Tips Podcast (Official Facebook Page) [https://facebook.com/rltstudios] Download/Like/Share [https://rltstudios.podbean.com] Real Life Tips Website [https://rltstudios.com] --------------- Roads by LiQWYD https://soundcloud.com/liqwyd Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Music promoted by Audio Library https://youtu.be/6XhY6AMmkLA
More! Growth Mindset, Arrival Fallacy, Destination Happiness… In this episode of Dream Lab Podcast, I speak with Dr. Francis “Vu” Tran, MD about achieving more/doing more and setting healthy goals while doing so. Check it out! #more #arrival fallacy #growthmindset #10yearchallenge #yet
Recharting Your Life With Hope -Get Unstuck and Discover Direction, Purpose, and Joy for Your Life
Dr. Jillian Rigert had it all, or so it seemed. She'd completed dental school, started medical school for oral surgery, and she was a captain in the airforce. But underneath the surface, she struggled with anorexia, depression, and suicidal thoughts. Dr. Rigert's courageous journey will have you asking yourself how societal pressures have played a role in your own life and whether or not you're in alignment with your essential self. She tells us how she let go of her identity as an oral surgery resident and airforce captain and started finally making choices that felt right deep inside. Societal pressure can trap us into being terrified to pivot. . Pay attention to those feelings of something not being a good fit Be careful of Arrival Fallacy--keeping your head down and thinking one day you'll be happy when x, y, or z happens. Notice if your mind is telling you there are only two options, A or B, especially if neither one is healthy or good for you. This is your mind making stuff up and tricking you into thinking the situation is hopeless When you're so afraid of being a disappointment to people that you'd take your own life, or suffer in some other way, this is a red flag to get help. We put an insane value on professions and degrees, even when they trump our health and mental well-being. These jobs and titles are part of our identity and we won't let go of these even if our health and lives are at stake Sit with decisions all on your own. If no one ever knew what you decided, if you weren't doing it for validation, what does your heart tell you to do? Jillian's website: https://www.jillianrigertcoaching.com/ has excellent blog posts talking more about her journey, the arrival fallacy, listening to your essential self, and many others. Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-rigert/
There's no one-size-fits-all solution for becoming happier and more productive! This week on YAP, we're chatting with Gretchen Rubin! Gretchen is a 5X Best Selling Author, Speaker, “Self-Help Queen”, and Happiness Expert. She is known as an influential and thought-provoking observer of happiness and human nature. In today's episode, we've compiled the most actionable of Gretchen's knowledge in one place. We'll yap about how to make your goals for the new year fun and attainable by choosing a theme like UPGRADE or a phrase like Walk 20 in 2020 that makes taking action easy! We learn how to personalize goal setting by covering the famous 4-tendencies: Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, or Rebel and how these personalities should best approach their desired outcomes. Lastly, Gretchen teaches us how to form new and helpful habits. She shares her delightful challenge this year of Rest for 22 minutes each day in 2022 and explains how habits and goals don't have to be extravigaint, but can be boring! It's never too late to start a new year's resolution! Make sure to listen and learn how to do it right in this week's episode! Sponsored by - Prose - Take your FREE in-depth hair consultation and get 15% off your first order today! Go to Prose.com/YAP. Shopify - Go to shopify.com/profiting, for a FREE fourteen-day trial and get full access to Shopify's entire suite of features. BrandCrowd - Check out brandcrowd.com/yap to learn more, play with the tool for free, and get 73% off your purchase. Jordan Harbinger - Check out jordanharbinger.com/start for some episode recommendations. Athletic Greens - Visit athleticgreens.com/YAP and get FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. Blinkist - Go to Blinkist.copm/YAP to start your free 7 day trial and get 25% off of a Blinkist Premium membership. Social Media: Follow YAP on IG: www.instagram.com/youngandprofiting Reach out to Hala directly at Hala@YoungandProfiting.com Follow Hala on Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/htaha/ Follow Hala on Instagram: www.instagram.com/yapwithhala Follow Hala on Clubhouse: @halataha Check out our website to meet the team, view show notes and transcripts: www.youngandprofiting.com Timestamps: (0:00) - Hala welcomes Gretchen to the show (1:27) - The Concept of Drifting in Life (3:20) - Gretchen's Career Pivot From Law To Research & Writing (5:30) - Importance of Loving to Talk About Your Job (6:30) - Drifting In The Age of Covid (9:12) - New Year's Resolutions/ Temporal Landmarks (12:22) - Correlation Between Goals and Happiness (14:14) - Setting a One Word Theme For Our Year (17:20) - Gretchen's Concept of 22 in 22 (18:29) - Gretchen Describes Her Tasting Parties (20:20) - Should We Place Boundaries When Setting Goals (23:15) - Sticking To Your Goals/ Four Personality Types (24:24) - Upholders (24:43) - Questioners (25:16) - Obligers (26:00) - Rebels (27:00) - Gretchen's Four Tendencies Test (30:00) - How Does Each Personality Type Stick To Their Goals (30:10) - How Rebels Stick to Goals (33:20) - How Obligers Stick To Goals (35:45) - Can We Grow Into a Different Personality Type? (39:10) - Why Obligers Are Not People Pleasers (40:10) - How Questioners Stick to Goals (42:42) - What is the Arrival Fallacy? (45:45) - Gretchen's Approach to Breaking Bad Habits (49:20) - What is Gretchen's 22 Minutes of Rest for 2022 Challenge? (51:55) - Getting More Sleep to Be Happier (56:08) - What is the one actionable thing that our listeners can do today to be more profiting tomorrow? (59:45) - Gretchen's Secret To Profiting In Life Mentioned In The Episode: Better Than Before (Gretchen's book): https://gretchenrubin.com/books/better-than-before/about-the-book/ The Four Tendencies (Gretchen's book): https://gretchenrubin.com/books/the-four-tendencies/intro/ Take The Quiz: Gretchenrubin.com/take-the-quiz Happiness with Gretchen Rubin: https://gretchenrubin.com/podcasts/
Are your big goals just making you miserable? The “too long, didn't listen” answer? Probably! Listen in as Stacie dives into the research on:Arrival fallacy, summit syndrome, and why so many of us are unhappy achieversThe negative effects of goal setting and why some goals are badWhy so many of us are stuck being unhappy achieversHow to stop being an unhappy achiever and enjoy your life as it is right nowHead over to the blog to find more resources and research on arrival fallacy, summit syndrome, and “unhappy achiever syndrome” (which I just made up y'all in case you try to go searching for it elsewhere). And sign up for my private podcast episode where I teach you a simple coaching exercise that helps you figure out what you really, really want.
On this week's episode, Dr. Kristin Yates breaks down that "now what" feeling, also known as "arrival fallacy." Get a true understanding of this phenomenon so many doctors experience and try to take a step back to enjoy how far you've really made it. Thanks for listening!
Norm MacDonald did an Ask Me Anything (AMA) on Reddit in 2018, and when asked what life's purpose is he said: "Well, it depends on your view I suppose but it's been my experience is that life's purpose is to suffer. To abide the inevitable pain and to bear it in a noble way."For many, particularly in the West, there's this notion that if someone "pays their dues," then one day they'll be able to do what they truly want to do. Their entire life they've been running, even chasing this horizon of retirement: the "dream" of just sitting on a beach all day. Then they can relax. In reality, this societally-shared concept of earned paradise is often a coping mechanism to avoid the uncomfortable work of confronting your current situation.What if that mindset is ironically guaranteeing an unhappy life?What is the cash value of living your life in a way that fulfills you right now vs. betting the farm on something 20-40+ years down the line, which is both untested and not guaranteed?Could true retirement exist within a flexible lifestyle? What is 30 years of the compound interest of increased happiness worth?My guest today is Chris Giuseppini. Chris is a cinematographer, entrepreneur, and founder of Sondor Media. He's helped YouTube influencers increase their reach by 100,000 subscribers and 2 million views in under a month, worked on videos that advertised for legendary video and photographic technology players, Sony, Canon, and Fujifilm. Now, with his own brand, Chris is taking his experiences working with some of the most fascinating video influencers to help entrepreneurs grow their business through authentic, powerful storytelling. Some of the topics we dove into:The path of least resistance when creating content.How to be vulnerable while connecting your personal passions to your professional content.Finding the right online platform for your content that resonates.Emotional investment with client work.Creative risks, split testing, and the positive downstream effects of failure.How to ask provocative questions to get to know someone quickly.Breaking through tribalism.How creativity and innovation are wasteful processes.The new rich, retirement, and the arrival fallacy.Life as a series of split-tests and sprints.Boredom, dopamine-fasting, and cultivating resiliency.Why you should embrace seasonality in your life.Lifestyle-creep, freedom, and minimizing responsibilities.The subjective nature of status, influence, and imposter syndrome.Connect with Chris:Website: SondorMedia.comLinkedIn: @ChrisGPresentsMusic by Kirby Johnston – check out his band Aldaraia on Spotify
Physician coach Michelle Chestovich MD explores the myth that "arriving" will make you feel more confident, happy or content. That our never ending quest to achieve more in order to feel better is actually not the solution.
Episode 194 is a solo episode chatting about the arrival fallacy, sharing a book recommendation and opening up a little bit about loneliness and fear. This podcast Is bought to you by Esmi Skin Minerals. At the start of today's episode you will hear from Loren, a dermal therapist and skin specialist from Esmi. Loren answers your questions on budget, pigmentation, healthy skin and anti-aging. Esmi have a special offer exclusively for the podcast community. Receive a FREE MINI when you spend $55 or more. Simply enter the code KYLIEGIFT when you spend $55 or more! Offer valid until Aug 8th 2021. Choose from a variety of 9 mini products including skin treats, masks and gentlefoliants. Shop the range esmi.com
In dieser Folge erfährst du, warum das Erreichen eines Zieles oft nicht glücklich macht. Wie wir uns unter Druck setzten, mit anderen in Wettkampf gehen und dabei das Wesentliche aus den Augen verlieren – glücklich zu sein. Dabei können wir bereits in den kleinen Dingen des Alltags unser Glück finden! Viel Freude mit der Folge.
Imposter Syndrome. Insecurities. Arrival Fallacy. In this bonus episode, Grasie Mercedes features captivating and candid moments themed around the universal feelings of Not Good Enough or Not Talented Enough. Each clip is pulled from a full conversation from the last two seasons of guests sharing their truth on Not Blank Enough. EPISODES: e010: Not In Control Enough, Jacey Duprie e001: Not Good Enough, Marie Forleo e026: Not Good Enough, Adrianna Guevara Adarme e015: Not Understood Enough, Tawny Newsome e016: Not Smart Enough, Bobak Ferdowsi e019: Not Doing Enough, Mandana Dayani e030: Not Fearless Enough, Amy Landecker e040: Not Anything Enough, Riki Lindhome e042: Not Satisfied Enough, Malcolm-Jamal Warner e038: Not Doing Enough, Nico Santos e027: Not Disciplined Enough, Tony Okungbowa e012: Not Talented Enough, Oliver Stark e024: Not Confident Enough, Damien Fahey THE SHOW: Please rate and review the show on iTunes. It really helps the show grow and be discovered. Follow NOT (BLANK) ENOUGH on Instagram @notblankenoughpod Check out our playlist on YouTube You can contact us at NotBlankEnough@gmail.com © 2021 Gumption Pictures
Are you waiting to reach your next goal before you can celebrate your success, be happy or spend more time with loved ones? If so you might be experiencing what positive psychologist call Arrival Fallacy. Arrival fallacy is the illusion that once we attain our next goal or reach our destination, we will also reach happiness. It's the idea that over there (there being your next goal) is better than here, right now. Arrival fallacy causes us to shift from being future-oriented to future-obsessed by causing us to be hyper-focused on the goal. And, as a byproduct we miss out on enjoying life every step of the way Listen and learn about the thought errors that lead to arrival fallacy, how it shows up in our everyday lives, and what you can do to shift out of it so it doesn't rob you of enjoying life right now. If you're ready to do the next big thing in your career, organize your life and time, finally balance work and life, heal old wounds and let go of the past, then come check out my coaching programs at VanessaCalderonMD.com. I specifically tailor them to meet your needs. From one successful Latinx to another. And, if you're a Latina Doc, join the community at LatinaDocs.com Dr. Vanessa Calderón, MD, MPP is a Harvard grad, physician, professional coach, mother of 2, and Latina leader with over two decades of leadership experience. She's a first generation Latina with immigrant roots, who's happily married and has created career and financial success. She's dedicated to uplifting the Latinx community. Dr. Calderón uses the perfect combination of psychology, thought work and evidence based coaching to help you create success in all domains of your life. Prescription for Latinxs Success is dedicated to the advancement of the Latinx community. The podcast uses the perfect combination of science, psychology and thought work to support the personal and professional development of Latinxs. Because when Latinxs succeed, they create programs, jobs and opportunities for their community. And, thriving Latinxs are examples for their communities of what's possible when they work smart, build successful careers, financial freedom, loving families and always stay connected to their heritage. Listen in and learn how you can create financial success, thriving businesses and loving families, and honor your roots.
What is Arrival Fallacy? Have you ever accomplished a goal and still feel unhappy? --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/andrea-lashea/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/andrea-lashea/support
Chase DiMarco talks to Dr. Kelly Casperson a practicing urologist. Dr. Casperson is passionate about female pelvic health and incorporates surgical and non-surgical treatment options in her discussions with patients. [00:40] How Dr. Casperson Is Changing Medicine for the Better [03:19] International Society for the Study of Women's Sexual Health (ISSWSH) [06:28] Advice for Med Students Considering Urology [11:04] Female Reproductive Health and Urology [12:22] Characteristics of the Ideal Urologist [13:08] Fellowships Associated with Urology [14:27] Myths, Limiting Beliefs, the Arrival Fallacy [17:03] Picking a Good Mate [18:21] Dr. Casperson's Podcast: You Are Not Broken Full show notes
We have all experienced that feeling of deflation after coming back from a dream trip, or getting a big promotion, or reaching a major milestone. And many times we feel guilty for it. We feel ungrateful. We feel like we can't even share it with anyone because they'll think we are impossible to satisfy. Yet it feels awful, and makes us irritable and depressed. This feeling has a name. It's called “Arrival Fallacy” and every human goes through it. In this episode we discuss 5 steps to overcome it so that we can get back to feeling good in the present moment irrespective of what's coming up next.
Ever achieved a huge goal, worked hard for ages and got what you wanted only to find that it's actually all a bit...underwhelming? Yep, us too! It doesn't mean you're ungrateful or that you didn't really deserve the success, it's just arrival fallacy. This week we discuss the disconcerting feelings of arrival fallacy and how to work through them so you can enjoy your success more. Get In Touch growthinprogresspod@gmail.com / @growthinprogresspod charlottephoebe.com / @charlotte.phoebe helenabradbury.com / @helenabradbury Recommendations Manumit Coffee Wagamamas Prawn Raisukaree dupe recipe
In this episode we discuss what arrival fallacy is and how it has shown up in our lives. We share how to recognize these thoughts and how to move past them.
Medicine is full of achievers. Most of us identify as one. But what this sometimes looks like is postponing our happiness until we achieve the next great thing. It sometimes looks like striving for more and more to find our happiness. But often when we achieve the next great thing, the happiness is short lived or absent. This is known as Arrival Fallacy, and many of us fall into this in medicine. We postpone our happiness until we are done with med school, then residency, then boards. What I teach you today, is a system that I teach my clients to start finding that sense of achievement every day, without having to bust your ass to do more, earn more or achieve more. Because the things you are doing are enough, right now, in this moment. You are enough. The system I teach you trains your brain to generate the feeling of accomplishment and pride every day. AND it can help you blow your own mind with results. So tune in and let me share the love! I'd also love it if you would leave me an iTunes review so we can get the word out to more OBGYN's that this podcast exists and is here to help! If you have any questions or comments, feel free to hit me up on Instagram @CoachMilesMD
Some of our anxiety, depression, feelings of failure and more might be the result of buying into this particular illusion. If you haven't already, subscribe now so you never miss a Wednesday episode! --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/craig-westhoff/support
"Somebody else's success doesn't limit your own," says AC Shilton, a freelance journalist and farmer. Thanks to Bay Path University for the support and Riverteeth for the promotional support. Keep the conversation going on Twitter @CNFPod.