TheModernMoron podcast

Ep. 121 Best 4th of July Ever; Miles Connor in Nashville Welcome to this mid-summer episode of the Modern Moron.  I'm so excited to share the conversation I had with a young musician named Miles Connor.  He's currently a student at Belmont University in Nashville Tennessee and was born and raised in the Dallas Texas area.  H's e's a bit of an old soul in that he was brought up with a lot of classic rock artists from the 60's and 70's.  I believe his first instrument was the guitar but his father was and is an accomplished musician and toured professionally back in the day as a drummer.   I've been wanting to talk to Miles for YEARS, literally as I've heard over and over what an accomplished musician he was becoming and how affable and friendly his was.  Well, one of my fancy friends from my days in L.A. flew to Nashville for the 4th of July.  In fact, Julie Welch has been on this program before in one of our first episodes when we did a tribute to her parents, Ken and Mitzie Welch, who were Emmy Award winning music arrangers for the Carol Burnett show and I believe the Jack Parr show way back in the day.  Julie is also friends with a guy named Brad Paisley, who really is a household name if you ever play even a little country music in your household.  Brad performed in Nashville on the 4th of July and it was broadcast on CNN without political commentary.   Julie arranged for my guest Miles to meet her sister Gillian Welch, who has been nominated for multiple Grammy Awards over the years and winning a Grammy for Best Folk Album in 2021. THEN… she took Miles to the Paisley's home/music ranch(?) is that a thing? Where he got to not only meet Brad Paisley, but jam with him and talk music.  Brad went to the same college that Miles is currently attending.  He got to hang there the evening before the 4th with some more fancy people including SNL alum Kevin Nealon, who's a decent banjo player himself.  A couple of other names get dropped including Michael Hitchcock and Tim Bagley.  Now those two names may not seem like household names but if you saw either of them you'd say, “oh, I know that guy!”  Michael is probably most recognized for his role in Christopher Guest's “Best in Show” where he was paired with Parker Posy as a couple showing Weimaraners and they both wore braces.  See… you remember.  He also wrote and produced many episodes of the hit show Glee which ran from 2009 to 2015 and you can see him all over the place.  Tim Bagley is also a great character actor who's currently playing Brad Schraeder in the HBO hit “Somebody Somewhere”.  You'd also remember him on the show   “Monk” with Tony Shalub, Tim played Monk's neighbor Harold and of course “Larry” from Will & Grace… There I go down another rabbit hole… anyway, Both of these guys are hugely funny, Miles mentions them in his story, they are working ALL the time and are very dear to this old Moron as I knew them way back when I was in L.A. and they were… very, very young…. In case they ever hear this.  Very, very young when I first met them. Back to Miles and an additional reason I think you're going to love him is his knowledge of the history of rock and country.  Glen Campbell… was known for his guitar playing as well and Miles recalls what a great session player Glen Campbell was back in the day playing for music producer Phil Spector as well as playing and singing with the Beach Boys.  Brad Paisley is right up there in his guitar playing alongside Glen Campbell.  In fact, I'm including the link to a YouTube Video of some legendary guitar players having a session at the Fender Custom Shop playing the theme to Game of Thrones back when that show was insanely popular.  In that video are players like Tom Morello from Rage Against the Machine, Scott Ian from Anthrax, Nuno Bettencourt from Extreme and… Brad Paisley.  Now those first guys may not be number one on your Spotify list, but you have at least heard of those bands because of their longevity.  And their longevity is partially due to those outstanding musicians.  Okay, I'm off track again… So, Miles is going to tell us about his very, very exciting and fun 4th of July experience mixed in with some talk about music, guitars, steel pedal guitars and what it's like to be a young, very enthusiastic musician getting their career started.  This may be the first time you hear the name Miles Connor, but I bet it won't be the last… please enjoy… CLOSE - I told you you were going to love him.  To me, Miles has three key ingredients for success as an artist.  Vision, Drive and Focus.  He has the vision of what he wants to do, he's got lot's of drive and enthusiasm, and he's got the focus to stay on track and not get distracted by… things… or people… like… girls.  College girls.  Okay, he's doomed.  But there's nothing like a college breakup to fuel a few good songs!  See?  There's material everywhere!  Thank you so much to Miles Connor… remember that name America… and to Miles' mom and Dad, Allison and Court for giving us such a great kid!  Don't forget to like and subscribe and forward this to someone you think would enjoy it.   We're going to leave you with a live recording of Miles last year in his audition for the Dallas International Guitar Festival 10 under 20 contest, which I'm guessing is the 10 best guitarists under 20 in Dallas.  He auditions with Voodoo Child.  I have a history with this song in that I'm always late to discover things like the Hendrix version of Voodoo Chile … no “d”... which I didn't discover until 20 years after it was released in 1968 on the Electric Ladyland Album.  I was working blowing up balloons for radio station KLSX in Los Angeles and I was mesmerized by the playing and the lyrics… and it was my favorite Hendrix song: “if I don't meet you no more in this world Then I'll, I'll meet you in the next one Now don't be late, don't be late.” A couple years later I was an actual disc jockey, when people listened to the radio instead of an app for music, at a station in Santa Barbara and I really liked this “new” guy… new to me named Stevie Ray Vaughn and I see Voodoo Child on his album “Couldn't Stand the Weather” and I thought, “oh no, Stevie… I love your playing but some things should be left untouched.  Don't try to top Jimi, just leave it.”  And then I played it.  And I was humbled.  Big time.  Between Stevie Ray Vaughn's Voodoo Child (a slight return) and his equally hypnotizing jazz soaked “Riviera Paradise” I was fully into the kool-aid of Stevie Ray Vaughan.  And now, here is another guitarist who can pull off the Hendrix as well… Miles Connor.  We will definitely see you again in this world and thank you for listening to The Modern Moron. The Game Of Thrones Theme Song | Fender Custom Shop | Fender  Brad Paisley DJ Duel/Hot For Teacher - YouTube   Dave Rawlings Machine - John Paul Jones- Going to California (Live at Georgia Theatre) - YouTube   Voodoo Child- Miles Connor Blues Band - YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmjtZBIxQxA - Inner Western Nights - Steelin' Hearts - YouTube 

Hi… I have not been taking our relationship very seriously have I.  I'm sorry… I haven't called, haven't written, you think I haven't even been thinking about you probably.  Well that's not true.  If fact this is the 4th attempt at episode number 120.  I can't tell why I haven't been producing, creating, whatever this is and at the same time I have a few really important-ish reasons why I haven't but we'll talk about that later… maybe. My guest is my good friend Larry Dorf.  I would consider him a “super friend” isn't that in like the league of justice with the DC comics realm.  Only we don't use the word “realm” anymore.  Now we say “multiverse”, right?  That's the craze for the last ten years… this obsession with the idea of a multiverse, from the 10,001 Marvel Comics movies to the animated Spider-Verse to Everything, Everywhere all at once, it's all a multiverse.  Maybe this is why I don't do episodes anymore… I can't stay on topic for shit.   Larry Dorf is a super-friend, that's how I digressed.  Larry if you remember is a fancy (from my cubicle'd perspective) Hollywood writer, producer and actor.  He and my other superfriends who he is partnered with have created Mike Tyson Mysteries for cartoon network and hit it pretty darn big with the Netflix show, “The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window”  It did really well, I loved it and if you like a parody that's not in your face schticky like Scary Movie, not that it doesn't have a place, but this was more suspense and definitely more subtle but very funny and well acted and well written and yes I'm biased. We recorded this episode in the first week of June 2023 and here it is mid July and I'm just now trying for my fourth time to publish an episode. The writer's strike had already been going on for some time, in fact by the time this episode sees the light of day the actors union SAG-AFTRA  has joined the writers and we may have to call Larry all over again. We talk about shows they are pitching or shows they were TRYING to pitch and the general process of pitching a show and how that was put on hold well before the writer's strike began  We briefly get off track talking about TV to fall asleep to.  That'll really put you on the edge of your ear buds so you don't want to miss that.   Another thing is… I did not spend as much time editing this episode down.  Will that make a difference?  Who knows… but if you notice a difference please include it in all the virtual cards an letters that have been coming in by the thousands.  I edited like the first 15 minutes and then said stop being so precious.  It's just the four of us listening to this anyway.  Let's see what happens.   We start our conversation by trying to get Larry comfortable as I know he loves to spin around in office chairs and then I have to set him straight on the difference between an office for a TV show or movie… a production office versus an office in the real world where you and I live.  I've worked in both and I can tell you… they ain't the same. CLOSE - I think there's something going on with Larry blocking certain things out from his childhood.  Maybe we need to get his wife Sam on the podcast and dig a little deeper.  Hope you enjoyed this episode.  I've missed you.  I have another summer episode to publish, hopefully it will be this summer of 2023.  Stay cool, stay hydrated for God's sake stay hydrated and thank you for listening to the Modern Moron.  

Happy Holidays from The Modern Moron recorded this day, the 25th of November, 2022.  It's Black Friday and there's no place I would rather NOT be than a mall, A Walmart, a Best Buy or an Amazon.  Also, I literally got back from the grocery  store and I thought I was going to have to take out a Home Equity Loan.  I just paid over $5 for a dozen eggs.  What the ever-loving- @##$%?  At what point is it going to  be …. That'll b e a dollar…. Another dollar…. Okay, two for one.  Thanks Grandpa Joe… for all the inflation.  It's your fault.  Your fault there's global inflation.  Whatever country your in, it's that political leader's fault that there is global inflation.  If you live in Canada, Thanks Trudeau.  If you live in China, thanks JinPing.  Great Britain's revolving door… thanks Sunak.  Or can we still blame Boris Johnson?  Thanks Bo-jo.  Or let's lay that on Liz Truss!  She was only there 50 days, it's all her fault.  Thanks Liz.   But let's stay in Great Britain, because… My guest is the Senator's daughter who has been on this show multiple times, this time from Edinburgh, Scotland!  She is attending the University of Edinburgh getting her Master's degree in Art History.  We talk about:  How wonderful and nice the people of Scotland are, dispelling the U.S. notion that everyone there is groundskeeper Willie from the Simpsons.   The Art History Masters degree she is achieving specifically is in accessibility, and as I said in the previous episode, we're not talking ramps and wider doorways, but accessibility in a broader sense.  Is it accessible to all social classes, ethnicities and cultures and are they all represented in art museums?  We talk about those little plaques next to the artwork that I almost never read.  Are they accessible to all?  I bring up something used in internet web content design and development called the Hemingway app.  Hemingway's style of writing, as  you may already know, is very concise and direct.  There's not a lot of flowery language in it which allowed him to get to the point more quickly.  It's very efficient.  And now… there's an app for that.  And it's called hemingwayapp.com .  It's free.  You go there, paste in your composition, or write in the page and the app will analyze your writing as you go.  It will highlight areas where your sentences and paragraphs can be made more simple. We talk about her roommates in her flat… there's 5 of em!  She brings up the term “Cultural Capitol” which is a theory created by this french guy Pierre Bordieu who was a French sociologist and public intellectual.  Seriously?  There's an occupation called Public Intellectual?  What's the annual salary of a Public Intellectual.  I'm a private intellectual.  I'm the most intellectual person in my bathroom at any given time. Back to Cultural Capital.  I'm going to read you a few sentences about Cultural capital and the sentences are a little too complex to be comprehended by some individuals, which lowers their Cultural capital and creates further inaccessibility.  Inaccessibility to knowledge.  Confused?  Me too. Cultural capital is defined as the social assets of a person that can be used to increase one's chances of success in life. These assets can be either tangible, such as clothes or educational certificates, or intangible, such as knowledge or life experiences. While everyone has some form of cultural capital, those from higher social classes tend to have more of it. This is because they have greater access to resources that can help them develop their skills and talents. Additionally, they are more likely to inherit cultural capital from their families. Cultural capital is not a static concept; it can change over time as people gain or lose access to resources. For example, someone from a lower social class who manages to get a college degree has increased their cultural capital. Similarly, someone from a higher social class who drops out of school may have lost some of their cultural capital. And, the meaning of cultural capital is not necessarily static. The social assets that society values can shift over time. There are three types or “states” of Cultural Capital: 1) There is the “Embodied” state which is the capital you have from your life experiences, learning your A,B,C's and being read to all the way through education and socialization.  2) the second state is called the “Objectified” state, more commonly known about twenty years or so ago as “bling”, “cheddar”, “lit”, “Gucci”, etc. And it's not just slang as we see it everywhere.  I drive a Ford Pickup and you drive a Mercedes or a Lexus or a Tesla, you've got more “Objectitfied” cultural capital than me.  Your grocery bags say Whole Foods, my grocery bags say Grocery Outlet.  You get it.   3) Finally, there is “Institutionalized” Cultural Capital which is the way society measures social capital.  The classic example of this is formal academic degrees; a masters degree carries more capital than a bachelors degree, a PhD even more and so on.  And let's not forget the degrees on the opposite end of academia, that being degrees from the School of Hard Knocks.  Depending on the culture, there may not be much perceived value on a degree from that institution or street smarts, but if  you do have it, you can still  gain your objectified capital (cha-ching). She uses the expression or notion that museums and the historically European art contained within is “The purveyor of absolute fact”.  And as part of the study of Art, she challenges that notion.  I hope I'm getting this right, otherwise she could sue me for defamation! The point, as I understand or misunderstand it is when she says there should be multiple entry points that visitors to a museum can access the art.  Something for everyone.  I liken it to the ski trails at a ski resort.  There's the green circle or the bunny  hills.  If you know a little more about art you can tackle the blue trails; I think it's a blue square?  Then if you're really down with the art, you can tackle the black diamond explanation of the painting or whatever the hell you're looking at.   Okay, enough babbling out of me, it's time to learn about Art Accessibility, Scotland style.  Grab yourself an Irn-Bru, unless it's time for a wee bit o' whiskey.  As the lassie and me have a little Blether.  Keeut Tine-g .. to TMM.  Thanks for listening.   CLOSE - The Modern Moron equates Cultural Capital to Willie Wonka and The Chocolate Factory.  You know, as far as great speeches from a movie go, I will put Gene Wilder's rant up against the best of them.  Gordon Geko and his “Greed is Good” speech or even Gary Cooper in his “Luckiest Man on The Face of the Earth” speech… a lot of the best speeches are from sports movies.  Especially if you're a misogynist moron like me.  I think we should do an episode on the best speeches from great movies.  What do you think?  Maybe some of them would apply to today as much as when we saw them on the big screen?   But that is for another day.  Thank you to my guest and best wishes on her upcoming Masters degree.  Thank you for listening and we'll see  you next time on TMM. Cultural Capital Theory & Examples | What is Cultural Capital? - Video & Lesson Transcript | Study.com  Understanding Ernest Hemingway's Incredible Writing Style - bookanalysis.com   https://hemingwayapp.com/   

Welcome to NPR's Wait Wait Don't Tell Me!  I'm Bill Curtis… Today's episode titled “Wait Wait Don't' Tell me it's not Wait Wait Don't Tell but actually The Modern Moron…”  I'm still Bill Curtis and here's your host of the Modern Moron… who is neither straight form a Hemingway Novel nor from the Sea… please welcome, The Old Man… Thank you Bill Curtis for that lovely introduction of The Modern Moron and The Old Man dot Show.  I know what you're asking yourself right now and the answer is yes, you can now find The Modern Moron on NPR by simply going to NPR dot ORG in your browser and then typing “The Modern Moron dot COM” into that same browser. This is part 2 of my conversation with my LA friend Larry Dorf.  Larry is my personal version of an Albert Brooks type and I tell him so.  I have a couple of those in my life and Larry is one of them.  He's a little… how do I say this… particular?  A little particular about how certain things are.  And somehow, to me, it's endearing and entertaining.  I love it.  Maybe it's the Goldylocks syndrome In the beginning of our conversation and a little bit into it, Larry… who I may earn the nickname “Goldylocks” for this show, has a little trouble getting comfortable as we chat about his son and dealing with his comic antics in the classroom.   We talk post pandemic virtual connecting via zoom and MicroSoft Teams if you're at work perhaps, and the requirements for an actor auditioning for roles and how that has changed drastically.  Whereas before, if you had an audition, they would send you the part of the script they wanted you to read, commonly called “the sides”, you would memorize the lines, go into the studio or casting office and read with the casting agent, where they would record you on camera and submit that to the producers, the director and the show runner.  But now, you're expected to be able to record yourself, at home and submit electronically.  This means you need to find someone to read the other parts, off camera, while you're recording yourself.  The upside is that you can do as many takes as you want and send in the best take, but you also don't have the opportunity to take direction from the casting director if they see something and would like to give you some direction. So Larry tells me about the challenges of auditioning post pandemic, and he drops a line that starts out as something that could be a great quote that you might hear from a great author or philosopher, and to me, it's one of those gems I can only get from my friend Larry.  But as I'm giving him a bad  time about it, I mention the great author of Moby Dick, James Melville.  Only there is no James Melville… it's Herman Mellville.  So in the moment that I am criticizing someone in their lack of eloquence, I boldly show what an idiot I am by calling Herman Melville, James Melville. And you know what?  I could have edited it out… I'm sorry had someone edit it out, we have a staff here at The Modern Moron.    But then it wouldn't be the Modern Moron.  This is exactly why the show has it's name.   We get to the meat of this episode when Larry tells me about an audition he had recently for a show on HBO Max about the Los Angeles Lakers during the 80's, the era that I believe was called “Showtime” but since there's a cable channel with that name already, the show on HBO is called,  “Winning Time: The Rise of the Lakers Dynasty” about  Magic Johnson, Kareem Abdul Jabar, James Worthy, Byron Scott, Kurt Rambis,  their coach Pat Riley, and owner Dr. Jerry Buss.  One of the Executive Producers, and the writer of the first episode is Adam McKay, who has created so many great movies, we should do a whole episode on him and his partner Will Farrell.  The only problem is… I don't get HBO.  Rats.  I'm a cable cutter and HBO is one luxury I have to live without… for now. Larry tells me that he auditions to play the part of Larry Bird's father, but he's concerned that Larry Bird was not considered a very attractive man in the NBA, so I go on to assure him there are many more unattractive guys in the NBA and we start going down the list.  Mean spirited?  Cruel?  How can I say this isn't cruel.  Of course it is.  Basketball players are not trying to be models even though some of them do.  Mainly, they just want to play ball, but being in the public's eye leaves them vulnerable to articles like the one we found in this podcast and is below this episode's description and vulnerable to moron's like us, neither of whom have been asked to appear in any fashion magazines.   One thing I will say about the cowardice of this article is that there is no author.  In fact this moron of a sports website gives the lame excuse that it was written by a combination of a few writers and editors and that's why there no name associated with the article which is a bullshit way of evading the horrible things users would have said about them.  Not here at the modern Moron.  Feel free to let us have it at TheModernMoron.com or theoldman.show. The entertainment industry is going through a mass restructuring.  This leads us to Warner Brothers canceling the release of what was going to be a major DC Comics film “Batgirl”.  CLOSE - As it should be.  If your going to get rid of animation, get rid of the stuff that's for kids.  Kids don't need to be watching cartoons.  They should be working.  Making t-shirts and shoes and mining coal.   Poor Leslie Grace… or is it?  I'm sure she got paid, but to do all that work and not have it come out has to be extremely disappointing.  I read one excuse, I'm sorry quote from a studio executive that said the DCEU, which stands for the DC Comics Extended Universe, was compromised in terms of telling the correct origin story for one of the DC characters that somehow hinged on the character The Flash.  And you thought daytime soap operas got sticky?   I think Larry… or Goldylocks had some great insight into the potential positive effects of pressure.  In his example it was the additional pressure of going in to a casting office for an audition rather than doing it from the comfort of your own home.  Always staying in your comfort zone is not a good thing, it's not a productive thing and it's when you leave that comfort zone that you challenge yourself to grow and maybe be a little better than you thought.  Wow…  That's some deep stuff.   I can actually tease our next episode as we will be having a long wonderful chat with the Senator's daughter!  She is attending Graduate School at the University of Edinburgh in Scotland.  That's right, The Modern Moron goes global.  She is getting her masters degree in art history specifically in the accessibility to art history… that has a lot more to it than wider doorways and ramps.  Maybe wider doorways in a metaphorical sense.  Very excited about that episode coming up next.   Thank you for listening to The Modern Moron and the Old Man dot Show.  We'll see you next time.     Winning Time: The Rise of the Lakers Dynasty | Official Website for the HBO Series - HBO.com  25 Ugliest NBA Players | SportyTell - sportytell.com Everything Revealed About Batgirl's Canceled Story - Screenrant.com Batgirl Star Leslie Grace Breaks Silence On DC Movie's Cancellation - Screenrant.com  

Welcome to another episode of The Modern Moron… my guest is producer, writer, actor Larry Dorf, yes, that Larry Dorf.  We have a very light early fall chat about a few subjects, namely:  We talk a little about some of the Modern Moron's more successful shows, one being on Phil Hendrie and his mastery of deception with his characters improvising with each other and his work on various animation projects from King of the Hill to Rick and Morty.   I refer to a story Larry told about an audition he had where he was being asked to play NBA legend Larry Bird's father, a story I will get to next time.  I'm sort of giving you this conversation backwards and here's why. Larry Brings up Adnan Syed, who has been released from prison after doing 20 years for a murder he did not commit.  His story was made famous by a podcast called “Serial” which was developed by “This American Life” that you know from NPR.  The podcast “Serial” is owned however, by The New York Times. You already know I'm a moron, so you won't be surprised to find that I am way late to the party on damn near everything and such is the case with the show “Only Murders In The Building”, which is a show about a podcast about a murder.  It's on Hulu and is into production of it's 4th season and I'm told that the show was based on the real podcast “Serial”.  I didn't realize how much… you hear that?  That's the theme music of the podcast “Serial” about Adnan Syed… And this… is the theme song to the Hulu series, “Only Murders in the Building”... Jezz, they could have at leas changed the key it's played in right? This brings up a subject I've been wanting to get to for some time and it's the concept of the Morally Dubious Podcaster.  It probably has other names, but i found an article with that phrase and I thought, “Morally Dubious?  Modern Moron”  They're synonymous. I read an article, have an unqualified opinion about it, say it into a microphone, bam; Morally dubious podcaster.  Only I'm not a celebrity and I don't have guests who are celebrities so, there's only the two of you listening and it works out about the same, just on a much, much smaller scale.  Plus I'm not pretending to try and crack a cold case or find a murderer.   So, Larry explains to me the case of Adnon Syed, and I'm oblivious as you can hear… like a typical old man, I can't seem to get the story straight…  Then Larry turns this into a potential gameshow along the lines of, “How much prison time would you do for a million dollars?”   This is what Hollywood people do for a living. We join our conversation basking in the glory of the first episode Larry did with us called “The Mystery of Mike Tyson” referring to the Adult Swim Animated series “Mike Tyson Mysteries” which is still our most downloaded episode.  Until this one…  CLOSE - And that, friends, is how a game show is created…  in South Korea.  Isn't that a little like the show “Squidgame”?  I couldn't stick with that show… it was too sad and dark for me.  I have enough of that crap running around in my head without watching a tv show about it.   Now that I've had two seconds to think about it, I would not do any time in a prison for any amount of money.  The subculture that goes on in prison is not something I want to pretend like I could tolerate even for a minute.  I did look up some of the lovely prisons both in California and across the country.  Pelican Bay and San Quentin are both nasty, gnarly prisons and so is the downtown county jail in Los Angeles.  Other residences I would not spend a minute in for any amount of money is the ADX, also known as the SuperMax in Colorado.  One article I read on the internet-so-it's-true… says that the structure is built in a way that inmates never see a guard or another prisoner.  I don't know if it's true, I don't want to know, I just trust that I don't want to go there.  Throw in Sing, Sing and Rikers Island in New York, and a few of the prisons in the deep south like The Holman Correctional Facility in Alabama and it just makes me want to be a law abiding citizen.  Why am I going on and on about prisons?  Well, I see in the news recently that a real sweetheart of a guy named Steve Bannon has been recommended to spend four months in prison for contempt of congress.  Hmm.  I wonder if one of the neighborhoods I just mentioned might be a good place for him?  Is anyone else thinking of the movie Deliverance right now?  Does anyone see a similarity between Ned Beaty's character and Steve Bannon?...  A couple of housekeeping items I'd like to pass along starting with two documentaries I'd like to recommend..  The first one is called “A Trip to Infinity” on Netflix.  I found it fascinating, I've watched it twice and am currently forcing my daughter to watch it in 10 minute increments.  Mathematicians, Cosmologists and physicists contemplate the concept of infinity… and it's broken up into different chapters: Infinity is very small, it's very large,infinity as a number in an equation, that the speed of light is both very fast and also very slow, that a circle is actually a polygon with an infinite number of points and in terms of time, infinity is a very very long time and that if you put an apple in an air tight box and wait for infinity years, that apple will eventually morph into anything and everything you could possibly imagine.  Even live versions of Rick and Morty.  So I highly recommend “A Trip to Infinity.” The other documentary is called “All Things Must Pass: The Rise and Fall of Tower Records”.  This subject matter is perfect for our demographic!  I'm sure you spent hours in Tower Records going up and down the isles looking at the amazing Album art that we took for granted then.  Isle after isle until you decided which album you were going to plunk down five dollars and change for, and then I think seven or eight and change and then I lost track.  But that was an important purchase.  And then I would have to sneak by the living room with my bright yellow and red plastic bag hoping my parents wouldn't ask me what I got.  They never did, but if my dad knew I was buying Cheech and Chong, Richard Pryor and Eddie Murphy albums?  No way.   And we also had Tower Books and Tower Posters across the street which was actually a head shop where you got everything from bongs to rolling paper to posters of fruits and vegetables doing disgusting things, incense, trippy candles with psychedelic waxes, macrame'd hanging plant holders… Tower records was the best.  The documentary is available on YouTube and I believe right now you can stream it for free.  It's a great documentary.  The only woman who made it as an executive at Tower back in the 70's put it best when she said that whatever Tower records was the one you went to, you thought it was the first Tower Records they ever had.  The documentary is directed by Tom Hanks' son Colin and he does a great job bringing the nostalgia of Tower Records back, whether you found their store in San Francisco on Columbus Avenue or the one on Sunset Boulevard in West Hollywood, Greenwich Village in New York or wherever you grew up, there was probably a Tower Records where you hung out. Elton John, Bruce Srpingsteen and Dave Grohl, who also worked at a Tower Records in Seattle, all reminisce about how special it was to roam the isles of a Tower Records.  Hanks also does a good job of not letting the documentary end on a downer, even though the internet and a little thing called Napster caused the Tower to crumble, the Japanese stores became independent and are still huge today.  Okay sports fans, that's it, enjoy post season baseball, college football and lots of Halloween candy!  We'll see you next time on the Modern Moron and… the old man show at the oldman-dot-show. The Rise of the 'Morally Dubious Podcaster' in Pop Culture | KQED  All Things Must Pass (1080p) FULL MOVIE - Documentary, Music - YouTube   A Trip To Infinity - Netflix  

Welcome to another episode of the Modern Moron dated October 10th 2022, which means we'll be talking about events from at least two months ago. I'm going to try something new in that I'm not spending so much time on this episode.  My guest is the Senator which is like Conan O'brien saying his guest is Andy Richter, but he brings up a couple of things with no real background or insight or explanation.  He just saw a show for 30 seconds which is more than enough to have an opinion about, whereas I take the due diligence of watching for at least 5 minutes.  We recorded on Friday and I'm publishing on Monday. Here are a few things we cover: Gas Prices - Especially in California where there are stricter environmental laws and also, summer and winter blends.  The Winter blend usually isn't available until November but apparently there will be an early harvest of the gasoline trees out here and they will start in early to mid October. California Gov. Gavin Newsom approved the switch from summer-blend gas to cheaper winter-blend gas. He wrote a letter to the California Air resources Board requesting the switch and here is a quote:  “In light of the dramatic increase in gas prices that California is experiencing, we should not wait until the end of the month to start distributing or to ramp up production of our winter-blend gasoline.  Also, please keep producing the special higher octane fuel I need for my batmobile.  Thank  you.” That is from a letter from Newsom to the California Air Resources Board. Something else to note about gas prices in California is that we have to refine our own gas due to those restrictions.  There are no pipelines running from East to West at least not west of the Rocky mountains to my extensive, extensive  knowledge. Governor De Santis sending immigrants to Martha's Vinyard - yes, this story is extremely old but the topic isn't and I don't really have a problem with it.  I still don't care for De Santis and using unfortunate people who are looking for a better life to make a point is not okay, but I don't see why all of the lower 48 states can't participate in sharing the load of the influx of immigrants at our border. Boston is a sanctuary city that is two thousand miles away from the Mexican border.  After a quick and uniformed check of the immigration statistics for Boston from The Immigrant Learning Center dot-org, the top ten immigrant groups are: China, The Dominican Republic, India, Haiti, Brazil, El Salvador, Vietnam, Canada, Guatemala and Cape Verde which is a group of islands in the Atlantic. The Senator mentions that he enjoys Skinny dipping in his pool - ew.  For some reason he reminds us numerous times that he has a “second home” up in the Sierra Nevada Mountains.  Remember when Pee Wee's Playhouse used to have a secret word and when someone said it, everyone would scream?  Today's word is a phrase and  it's “second home” Flavored Bourbon.  Both the type you buy and the kind you can make at home!  That's a fun home project.   We talk a little about Football and why one might boycott it, and also news sources.  For purposes of this show I usually site the source but if I don't and I say I read something, it probably means I read it on the Associated Press, Reuters or the Wall Street Journal.  If I say I heard something, it was probably NPR.   And then… here's a great  topic for two irrelevant, pasty old white guys to talk about: Kanye West.  The Senator has gotten in the habit of bringing up a topic without doing any research and by research I mean reading the whole article or following up on some basic who, what, where stuff and then he goes off half cocked and then says, “I don't know, I thought it was interesting, and you should look that up and blah, blah, blah.”  Well, I watched some of the interview between Kanye West and Tucker Carlson and I can tell you I'm not really interested in either of them or trying to understand their message.  Why would I?  I'm old and pasty and irrelevant.   I mention a little bit about him from the Wikipedia page on him, but you guys know generally who he is and I don't have the energy or the desire to articulate why I don't care for him any more than I care for, say Keith Olbermann. We join the conversation with me asking the Senator how life is living alone as his wife is in Europe with her daughter and he's generally a little wound up so I have to settle him down.  Hope you find something interesting in this episode and don't forget… the secret phrase is… “Second home” CLOSE: Regarding the funeral of Hell's Angels leader Sonny Barger, the Senator was correct stating that the memorial service was held at a speedway in Stockton, California.   Regarding Kanye West, he does have bipolar disorder and David Letterman asks him about it in the Netflix series “My Next Guest Needs No Introduction”... And his 2018 album is titled, ““I Hate Being Bipolar It's Awesome”.  2018… THAT is cutting edge reporting for the Modern Moron.  The Kanye West Album I did get was called “Called Late Registration”  and has the song Gold Digger with Jamie Foxx when he played Ray Charles… remember that?  Great performance.   Also, as of this recording, West was suspended from Twitter and Instagram for antisemitic comments.  To have bipolar disorder and be in the public eye seems beyond difficult.  We are all responsible for our actions until it is deemed that we cannot be responsible for our actions.  And then what?  We get institutionalized?  Is Kanye West a genius artist or insane or both?  And how do we deal with free speech when people with behavioral and mental health disorders and conditions?  In a democracy, does the majority ignore radical views until they go away naturally?  One would hope and think so, but today so many people have this social megaphone and to get heard above all the noise we are reverting to more radical statements to be heard, to get attention.   Why do I feel like I'm Jerry Springer at the end of an episode?  That show was a perfect example of what I'm talking about. See you next time.   Map: Sanctuary Cities, Counties, and States - CIS.org (Center For Immigration Studies)  Quick Immigration Statistics: Greater Boston -  ilctr.org (Immigration Learning Center) 

A lot more God talk in this one people, which you may or may not be into.  A lot of Philosophical and theological perspectives on God, with a capital G.  We continue our conversation with a very interesting Seminarian who has been studying not only theology but philosophy as well so he use big words, make brain thing hurtey.  This recording dates back to August of 2022 and I'm just now getting to it… my friend the Seminarian was in a summer program of Chaplaincy at the hospital where I do some volunteer work, we've had some interesting conversations and I finally connected with him to be on this show.   We start out with a simple question, that being: If God is all loving, how can there be so much hatred among us?  If you are looking for an answer to that question, you'll need to visit another podcast, but inevitably, the answer to all questions can be found in a podcast. A few glossary items referred to in this episode: The Eternal Now - It feels to me like I'm hearing more and more about this referred to as Mindfulness and mindfulness meditations, but to a Catholic Seminarian it is much more.  It is his desire to be as present to God as he is present to us.  This also sent me down a crazy rabbit hole that led me to a site called “faithhub.net”.  Faithhub!  Doesn't that sound tasty?  Like GrubHub only they deliver faith!  Right to your door! There is a post titled, “God's Eternal Now” it reads, “God, is present, here, and NOW. In each moment.  It is our greatest desire to be present to God as he is present to us.  It is we who are often missing from the moment and, therefore, are often out of touch with God.”  Even if you take God out of the equation, and please do if you have a negative association with that word for now.  Take God out of the equation, and most reasonable and thoughtful people would see the value of being in the moment and that, regardless of faith, we spend way too much time regretting or reliving the past and fretting about the future.  I know I do and there really isn't much value to it.  Other than the satisfaction I get out of having a winning drop the mic argument with a fictitious person I've never met in a situation that will never occur. Back to the article on Faithhub… and get ready for a rabbit hole because it led me to a previous rabbit hole, that being author C.S Lewis.  Remember I told you I thought he wrote Alice in Wonderland but it was actually Lewis Carroll?  Well, this time it IS C.S. Lewis I am interested in.  Lewis was an author of novels filled with Christian metaphor and before he wrote the Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe, he wrote a novel called “The Screwtape Letters” which was dedicated to his friend J.R.R. Tolkien.  “The Screwtape Letters” was published as a list of letters from a senior demon or devil, named Screwtape, to a lower level Devil, named Wormwood… sounds like JK Rowling snatched and changed a couple of names there doesn't it?  Wormwood is actually the nephew of Screwtape, and Screwtape advises Wormwood on how to treat his patient, which is an earthly being, so as to get him over to the dark side.  Wormwood tells Screwtape, “Our business is to get them (meaning mortals) away from the eternal and from the present.” He also tells Wormwood that if the human “concerns himself with the Present because there, and there alone, all duty, all grace, all knowledge, and all pleasure dwell, his state is very undesirable and should be attacked at once.”  - Your affectionate uncle, SCREWTAPE.“ This all gets back to the Eternal Now our Seminarian tells us about in this episode.  Next glossary term...  Boethius - He was a Roman Senator and Christian Scholar in the Early Middle Ages, when Rome was embracing Christianity and wrote and translated a bunch of texts.  There's your moron definition.  next…. We talk about How to pray for someone and give them their money's worth. We learn the origin of the term scapegoat!  You guys probably know already but I haven't a clue.  He also tells us who THE all time scapegoat is.  Here's a hint… the GOAT is not Tom Brady. Also, a note: There is a graphic description of death and dying in this episode that you may not feel comfortable hearing, specifically involving a patient dying from cancer. With that same patient there is a discussion about the power of forgiveness, which leads me to bring up a professor I have mentioned before on the is podcast, Dr. Fred Luskin from Stanford University.  He has done extensive research on the training and measurement of forgiveness therapy. His research demonstrates that learning forgiveness leads to increased physical vitality, hope, enhanced optimism and conflict resolution skills. It also shows that forgiveness lessens the physical and emotional toll of stress, and decreases hurt, anger, depression and blood pressure. There is a link at the bottom of the description to a short talk by Dr. Luskin. We pick up our conversation right where we left off last time, in fact there's a slight overlap as our guest is talking about the literal versus figurative when trying to interpret the Bible.  It's my conversation with a seminarian and his chaplaincy work in a hospital and thank you for listening to The Modern Moron… CLOSE - I hope you enjoyed that conversation with my friend from the seminary and I will try to keep in touch with him and hopefully have him back. Since I have a couple of minutes I'd like to tell you about a recent visit I made to a patient.  I was on the floor walk along and came to the door that was closed and had a sign posted that before anyone entered they should check with the attending nurse.  I did and found out that it would be okay and that he seemed to be in a good mood that day, as he had been doing Elmo impressions earlier.  Not knowing exactly what that meant, I walk in and find a young man, probably in his 20's to early 30's, long hair with a gauze mesh over his entire left leg due to a burn, and not much clothing other than that.  His blanket was covering his kibbles and bits, and he had an incarceration geo-tracker on his left ankle.   Not much of a traditional conversation.  Even though I'm a moron, I'm feeling like not only am I observing someone who could possibly be a meth addict to the point of permanent damage, I also have the very unprofessional feeling that I'm observing someone who could be schizophrenic.  Also, he looked to be fairly healthy physically and lacked the gaunt look with accompanying sores and missing teeth.  He seemed to have all his teeth.  Yay!  They certainly were not dentures… and if they were, he got ripped off.   So which is it? Meth of schizophrenia?  I looked it up and gosh darn if there isn't some overlap between methamphetamine-Induced Psychosis and Schizophrenia.  How about that.  There is a link to a study of just that at the bottom of the description if you're interested. It can be difficult, with out the proper educational background, to make the distinction between someone who is suffering from addiction to Chrystal Meth and someone who is schizophrenic.  I was speaking with a new friend who is in one of my exclusive social clubs that has recovered from addiction to meth and heroin, and he told me based on his experience and not medical data or trials or anything professional, that someone on meth will hallucinate, see and interact with hallucinations, partially because the stimulant effect has kept them up for 4, 5 or even 6 days and they are literally trying to sleep while awake and it results in these hallucinations.  Again, that is the experience of one person, not a science based or clinically based conclusion.  He also said that in his experience, the withdrawal from heroine was more physical with an actual craving for the drug, while the withdrawal from meth was additionally psychological.  Again, his experience.   Also, I noticed he had rather long fingernails, which I was slightly concerned that if he got squirrely on me, I would not care to get scratched by this… um… person.  He did seem to respect that I was a Chaplain, he did have a bible with him and at one point asked me what was my favorite quote from the Bible.  I am not that familiar with the bible and you wanna know what this moron's answer was?  I said, “you know, the gospel of Matthew is the first thing that comes to mind.”  I mean, why limit myself to a favorite verse?  I'll take the whole book, thank you.   This patient was pretty cagey.  In fact that's a pretty good word to describe him.  Every couple seconds his eyes would shift as could his mood.  So I tried to wrap up my talk with him in some prayer.  He asked me to pray for him and just like our seminarian recommended, I asked him, “what would you like me to pray for?” His response was, “I would like you to pray that I will be back with my wives and that I never test positive for Chrystal Meth again.”  Not my wife, my wives and not to be released from the grips of Meth and it's addiction, just don't let me get caught.  And you know what?  That's exactly what I prayed for… “Heavenly Father, please let Bob heal from his injuries so he  can be reunited with his wives, and may he never test positive for Chrystal meth again.  And also God, please release him from the grips of it's addiction.”  I threw that last part in there so I would have a clean conscious.  He told me that prayer was very powerful, I bid him goodbye and as I left the room he continued a conversation with his imaginary friends.  Out of curiosity, if you have ever prayed for either of those things, to be reunited with your wives or to never test positive for meth again, would you please… PLEASE contact the Modern Moron because we would LOVE to hear your story… provided you can string two sentences together. You might think you yourself, “how can you be a chaplain and not know the bible?”  My answer is that so far, the patients I have sat with mostly want some one to just listen.  Listen to them, listen to their story, listen to their suffering and just be present.  Not to come up with my own fish story or my tall tale that one up's your story.  And, so far that has been acceptable… but I do have a lot to learn.  Thank you for listening to these last two episodes that have been a bit different than what we've had previously.  Hit like, and subscribe and write a glowing review and all the things people don't want to do when they listen to a podcast.  If fact, you know what?  Skip it, I wouldn't do it either.  We'll see you next time…  A Comparison of Methamphetamine-Induced Psychosis and Schizophrenia: A Review of Positive, Negative, and Cognitive Symptomatology - National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI)  What Is Forgiveness? | Fred Luskin, PhD - YouTube   God's Eternal Now | FaithHub - Faithhub.net  

Okay, the Moron doesn't seem so moronic in this episode… well, I do, but we really have some divine inspirations in this episode.  My guest is a real live Seminarian in the Catholic Church.  Yes, THE Catholic church, not one of the knock offs.  He's been pursuing his coronation… that's not right… ordination!  That's what I was looking for…  This conversation is all over the place, and I have to take responsibility for that.  If I get him back I really need to try and keep my questions more focused.  And because we are so all over the place, this guy drops some people and terms this Moron had to look up, especially if you're not Catholic or are a heathen moron like myself.  Among them: Exegesis - not exit, Jesus - this is e-x-e-g-e-s-i-s and it's a critical explanation or interpretation of a text. Traditionally, for work with religious texts, especially the Bible St. Ignatius of Loyola - who was a Spanish Catholic Priest and theologian that was one of the founders of the Society of Jesus otherwise known as… the Jesuits.  We might have to do a separate episode on those guys. A St. Paul Moment - which is explained in the episode, but it's basically an epiphany or a “moment of awakening”... I don't like to gossip but apparently he heard the voice of Jesus and was immediately blinded for three days until a guy named a-nan-ias restored his sight and he was baptized. The 14 Discernments of Spirits - no it's not a way to make bourbon, it is the path to living a holy life.  is the interpretation of what St. Ignatius of Loyola called the “motions of the soul.” These interior movements consist of thoughts, imaginings, emotions, inclinations, desires, feelings, repulsions, and attractions, what the Buddha might call cravings and aversions.  Spiritual discernment of spirits involves becoming sensitive to these movements, reflecting on them, and understanding where they come from and where they lead us.  Yes, I plagiarized this from a site called IgnatianSpirituality.com and there is a link at the bottom of the episode description. Towards the beginning of our conversation there is the mention of a code blue.  A code blue at a hospital Usually means cardiac arrest (when the heart stops) or respiratory arrest (when breathing stops).  You may say, what the hell is a chaplain doing anywhere near a patient experiencing cardiac arrest?  Usually they are on the sidelines, staying out of the way.  However if family members are present, we will get with them and suggest they stay out of the way and perhaps go to a more quiet area while the team does there work.  It can be very traumatizing to watch a loved one receive treatment for cardiac arrest and while we can't make a family member leave, it's usually best to just get out of the way and let them do what they were trained to do. Our guest entered the seminary straight out of high school and mentions leaving the Central Valley, that would be the Central Valley of California which is comprised of a LOT of farmland and ranching.  You hear about how much of our country's Fruits and veggies are grown here under normal circumstances so for all of the approximately 18,000 square miles of that valley, a lot of that are the same folks you'd meet in the Midwest.  It looks like the Midwest and it has a lot of the same values as the Midwest despite the libby-McLibberson label that California has.  So, that's what he's referring to when he mentions the Central Valley.   Towards the end of our conversation we end up talking about Star Wars as my friend the Father-to-be is a science fiction fan and loves Star Wars.  I ask about the possible parallels between the Jedi Knights and the path of a priest which he disagrees with completely and being that he has also studied Philosophy as part of a Priest's curriculum,  I had to get out the dictionary again as he compares priests to stoicism.  Stoicism is from the Greeks and was the belief that we don't react to events; we react to our judgments about them, and the judgments are up to us. They would advise that we should not worry about things beyond our control as everything in life can be divided into two categories – things that are up to us and things that are not. Then…THEN he brings up philosopher Nietzsche.  Look, I can barely pronounce his name let alone discuss his philosophy.  So Nietzsche is this fatalist philosopher that thinks in the end nothing matters and everything is pointless, like they teach on Sesame Street!   So Nietzsche had this concept called The Will To Power, that our Seminarian brings up which is according to Wikipedia like self-determination, the concept of actualizing one's will onto one's self or one's surroundings, and coincides heavily with egoism.  Egoism!  There's something I get get behind.     We begin our conversation as I ask him how his last overnight shift went at the hospital.  So, I hope you find this conversation interesting and do not try to look up words while you're driving.  Let me handle stuff like that.   CLOSE - Wow… that did not sound like your typical conversation between two morons, right?  A lot of very interesting stuff there, and sometimes I have to just lean hard on the old “God is Love” bumper sticker.  Either I am in acceptance of that ideology, tweaked allover the place to make it fit for me, I'm not and if you're not, then best of luck to you and may your blood pressure remain forever low.  But scientifically speaking, I think you might find that having a faith in something, you could use the word God for the sake of convenience, but not the baggage that you might believe that word comes with… having that sense of faith and finding comfort in it, will actually lower your blood pressure and can relieve stress.  Not necessarily clinically proven, but there are studies that show benefits.  There are two articles at the bottom of the description on this point from North Dakota State University and from Psychology Today Magazine.  There is a benefit.  Just try not to get hung up on nomenclature.  Don't like the word God, don't use it.  Don't like meditation?  Try silent prayer.   Many thanks and all the best to my guest, more to come and hopefully we will speak with him again!  Take care, stay cool if you're where its hot, stay dry if you're where it's flooding, may the road rise to meet you rather than the ocean and thank you for listening to the Modern Moron. Discernment of Spirits - IgnatianSpirituality.com  What Is Stoicism?  Philosophy of Friedrich Nietzsche - Wikipedia Nihilism - Wikipedia   Process theology - Wikipedia   The Health Benefits of Spirituality — North Dakota State University   The Surprising Health Benefits of Spirituality | Psychology Today  

Thank you for tuning in to another episode of the Modern Moron… I did say I have an episode coming with a seminarian in the Catholic church, and I do.  This episode is the last half of my previous conversation with the Senator when I dropped out of it because I felt the need to address some science issues that we seem to be ignoring right now that place the economy as more important that the planet we live on and the resources that are becoming more rapidly scarce, namely water and oxygen.   This conversation contains the beautiful faux paux from the Senator when he cannot remember the name of Brittney Griner, the WNBA player who is currently sentenced to 9 years in a  Russian prison for possession of  vaporizer cartridges containing less than a gram of hash oil.  She had been prescribed medicinal cannabis in Arizona, and it is illegal in Russia. The Senator's take is that if you're going to travel, know the rules.  Also, he's never heard of Brittney Griner and who cares about her and we shouldn't be trading a no name for an apparently notorious arms dealer.   That's a valid point I think. But to say Brittney Griner is a no name just because I've never heard of her doesn't make her a no name.  Between Brittney Griner and me, I think I qualify as the no name.  But i think it does speak to the subculture we live in, and there are many.  What is your subculture?  Do you even think about it?  Or do we think of it as a mainstream culture?  My subculture is that I'm an aging white male… hell that's not a subculture!  That's as mainstream culture as you can get!  But I also live in a subculture of music as I was in the music entertainment business as a “DJ” for a stretch of time, so names that are familiar to me may not be familiar to you unless we share that subculture.  And if you're in it, you don't think of it as a subculture.  If I say I'm a big fan of John Paul Jones, you may think I'm a history buff.  But I'm referring to the legendary bassist… and keyboardist… of Led Zeppelin.  And I consider him, Jack Bruce, Getty Lee to have transcended the traditional roles of their instruments.  What instrument?  A scalpel?  Are they famous surgeons?  Let's throw in Paul McCartney.  Okay, there's a point of reference we can all sink our teeth into. So Brittney Griner is not a household name, depending on the subcultures we subscribe to.  And I would say if you are in the huge College Sports Industry, even on an administrative level, you know who Britney Griner is.  I don't, but she is legendary in her profession.  Unfortunately, her profession doesn't put as many asses in the seats as it would if she were male, where she would command a higher… salary.  Back to money again. I could go on and on about her accomplishments on the court.  She's a phenomenal women's basketball player.  But what I think makes her such a high value trade for the Russians is that she checks a lot of boxes that are very sensitive in American culture today and there are a lot of boxes these days.  Among those boxes: she's a woman, she's a woman of color and she is among the LGBTQ community.  Those are all high profile, high sensitivity issues… if you're a democrat or a liberal.  But if you're a tried and true conservative… do you honestly care about any of those?  I mean behind closed doors.  Of course publicly you'd give lip services to them but c'mon, just between you and me… do you give a rat's ass about any of that stuff? Final note on Britney Griner… she does have someone in her corner that is going over to Russia to advocate for her release and he's no stranger to snuggling up to communist leaders.  That's right folks, NBA Hall of Famer, reality TV star, and body piercing world champion Dennis Rodman has received permission to travel to Russia to help seek Griner's release.  "I got permission to go to Russia to help that girl," said Rodman.  I don't understand the  “permission” part of it as he doesn't need special permission from the U.S. to enter Russia — just a visa from Moscow.  You may remember Rodman's trips to North Korea to meet with leader, dictator and local sycophant, Kim Jung Un just to hang out, maybe shoot some hoops. And that's as cutting edge topical as this podcast gets.   We also talk about mushrooms!  And not the kind you saute and put on a steak.  I'm talking about yummy for your brain psychedelic mushrooms and their legitimate use in clinical trial programs to treat every kind of PTSD, depression, anxiety, cancer, addiction… the list goes on as to the medicinal benefits of psilocybin, the active molecule in these mushrooms. And in these trials they are measuring the presence of conditions not normally measured or considered with other types of medicine.  There was, and perhaps still is, a clinical study at Johns Hopkins University Hospital using psilocybin where they have a questionnaire that can determine if a patient had what is termed a “mystical experience”.  Questions like the following: During your experience did you feel:  An experience of amazement Feelings of tenderness and gentleness Feelings of peace and tranquility Experience of ecstasy  Freedom from the feelings of personal self  A sense of unity or one-ness of all things Pure being and pure awareness The fusion of your personal self with a larger whole A feeling that you experienced something profoundly sacred From a mystical sense did you experience: Before you call me a hippy tree hugging liberal… I want to suggest a fascinating limited series on Netflix which is based on a book called “How to Change Your Mind: What the New Science of Psychedelics Teaches Us About Consciousness, Dying, Addiction, Depression, and Transcendence” by author and host of the show Michael Pollan. I want to play you a short excerpt from the 2nd episode on psilocybin, where Pollan asks a patient, who I bring up later in this episodes, some of the questions on a mystical experience I mentioned .  The patient is right in our demographic and she is dealing with cancer.  She is a devout catholic and you will hear her mention Mary in this clip.  She is referring to the virgin Mary: Earlier in her life, this woman  experienced a miscarriage which affected her deeply.  She worked through it and hadn't thought about it for decades.  And in her psilocybin experience, she said she had an encounter with Mary who told her not to worry because she- the Virgin Mary-  had that child the whole time.  Pretty profound… if that testimonial doesn't make you curious enough to watch the episode regardless of your faith practice, I don't know what will… other than my enlightened endorsement of course.   You obviously shouldn't take my word for it on this and the host, Michael Pollan, doesn't want you to take his word for it either.  Professor Robin Carhart-Harris is a neuro-psycho-pharmacologist… let's hear the Senator pronounce that.  And he looks at and measures the effects of psychedelics on the brain and can they be useful…  There is also reference to The default mode network of the brain, which I had to look up.  This part of the brain is potentially the neurological basis for the self, meaning: Autobiographical information or Memories of events and facts about your self Self-reference: Referring to traits and descriptions of yourself Emotion of one's self: Reflecting about your own emotional state The default mode network is also involved in how you Think about others or: Thinking about the thoughts you have of others and what they might or might not know Understanding the emotions of other people and empathizing with their feelings Moral reasoning: Determining a just and an unjust result of an action Social evaluations: Good-bad attitude judgments about social concepts Obviously this is a gaping rabbit hole and I hope you find it interesting and will watch “How to Change Your Mind” on Netflix. We pick up our conversation with the Britney Griner conversation and The Senator's mis-recollection of her name.  Thanks for listening to another episode of the Modern Moron! CLOSE -  Okay, there will be a new segment on this show for a while… we'll call it Moron Chaplaincy.    “But for the grace of God, go I”, the phrase can be traced back to a mid-sixteenth-century statement by John Bradford, "There but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford", in reference to a group of prisoners being led to execution.  Bradford was an English Reformer in the 1500's and you can look him up if you want beyond that. I guess I failed to mention in the opening that we had a little reference to Caitlin Jenner, when we were talking about Britney Griner.  It's difficult to keep track of all the stupid things we say.  And how about Wayne Gretzky as a hockey reference?  He hasn't played hockey since 1999.  Both a tribute to Gretzky's greatness and to our stupidity.  Thank you to the Senator for being one of the pillars of the Moron Empire, best of luck to Dennis Rodman in Russia, and good luck to all of us in our search for enlightenment.  See you next time. "How To  Change Your Mind" Ep. 2: Psilocybin - Netflix  Psilocybin can occasion mystical-type experiences having substantial and sustained personal meaning and spiritual significance - Johns Hopkins Hospital Default mode network of the brain - Wikipedia

Half cocked, half informed, full moron. Seriously, the things we talk about and the half-cocked opinions we spout are really so misinformed that I would like to ask you a favor.  My favor is that you half listen but don't really pay attention.  Is that possible?  Listen for one of us to mispronounce something or to say something completely off base but I don't want you to really pay attention.  If you could… picture us both sitting on a front porch in a couple of rocking chairs.  That's the best setting for this conversation.  Can you do that?   This is also not the cheeriest episode.  We try to stay away from politics and that lasts for about… 10 seconds?  I've cut some stuff from this episode but left in other stuff for entertainment purposes.  For example: We talk about the huge bill that Senator Joe Manchin helped pass but the Senator  mispronounces his name.  I'm not going to tell you what our Senator thinks his name is but I know it's wrong and then I get it wrong.  So much moron in this episode folks. Next up, Nancy Pelosi goes to Taiwan, which the Senator is in favor of and I am not.  However the Senator's take is that China should not have any say in where any of our citizens travel and Taiwan does not belong to China.  That part I agree with.  I just don't understand the trip specifically for her as the Speaker of the House.  Was she sent over there on a diplomatic mission?  Or is she just over there on a personal publicity trip.  If it's the latter, I am against it.  This does not seem like the job of the Speaker of the House.  Maybe, however… “unofficially” she was sent there as a representative of the US to thumb our noses at China.  And if that is the reason, okay… I guess.  This is just a pissing contest.  While Pelosi was there the Chinese military conducted “live ammunition” drills and invading airspace, blah, blah, blah look how big my wiener is exercises close to Taiwan. However there is a tiny upside to this… the last time this high a ranking official visited Taiwan was in 1997 when then House Speaker Newt Gingrich visited.  The Senator is incapable of saying Gingrich's name… Then the conversation takes an unexpected turn and it gets rather sad.  The Senator wants the President to do something about the economy and says “we have enough oil to last us another 300 years.”  And I'm taken aback..  I don't quite know what to say.  I think you can hear the confusion in my voice.  Has he been paying attention to what's been happening to this planet?  Am I just another tree hugger?   The Senator thinks we should be drilling for more oil to fix the economy.  Seriously.  And he's not alone… We've got weather systems creating temperatures that are breaking records set by previous years, and I don't mean decades ago or centuries ago, I mean last year.  Personally, I don't think electric cars are a long term solution either.  Does anyone know what the byproduct of mining for Lithium is?  Me either, but if you sift out a bunch of some element from the earth, there's gonna be stuff left over.  What is it and how will it effect the environment long term?  As in for your granddaughter.  YOUR granddaughter.  You know who I'm talking to.  I'm talking to you, that old fart that loves their granddaughter more than anything.  What are we leaving her?   He thinks that SOME…mmm “some” of the climate change we are seeing around the world is from the way we've treated the planet in the use of fossil fuels but we should still be drilling to get the economy back on track.  That, to him and many others, is more important than what is happening to this planet, because we really don't know how much is caused by us… we don't know!   I thought we have decided as a nation to make a switch to renewable energy and to phase out fossil fuel.  Mega droughts, Mega Heat waves, Mega floods…the horse has left the barn on our environment and we're still chasing our tails trying to improve the economy and the mighty dollar.  The laws of nature and the laws of physics don't care about what laws congress passes or vetos.  You may continue to say it's overreacting, so I'm going to let a couple of those guys that wear the white coats talk later, what are they called?  Scientists, I think is the name. We'll hear from one dummy named Carl Sagan, remember him?  I have something for you from him back in 1980.  And another, more recent dummy you may have heard of named Neil deGrass Tyson about that subject instead of us two morons. So, why do I leave some of this Moron mayhem in?  Three reasons: 1) The Senator was recently in France when there was a heatwave going on and it was when the UK had declared a heat warning.  For the first time.  Ever.  Ever, ever.  Maybe the Norse God Odin declared one once when it got over 25 degrees once.  I texted the Senator an article about it asking if he still thought global warming was a hoax.  You will find out his response. 2) He then says he's depressed and wants to talk about sports after he brought up politics in the first place.   3) when I bring up France, he wants give a blow by blow account of his trip to a wedding in fancy France and how he talked to some dignitary and I'm not having any of it because I'm pretty sure you don't care.  I know I don't care and I put the kybosh on that and shut him down.  I guess I'm hoping you will find that entertaining.  You can just hear it in his voice that he's all bent out of shape because I'm not the least bit interested in his intellectual conversation about politics with some French dignitary. After I interrupt the show, the Senator has one final topic he'd like to bring up that he says is a sports topic more than a political topic and that is Britney Griner who has been sentenced to 10 years in a Russian Prison for possession of a cannabis product, I think it was hash but it doesn't matter at this point.  Let's just say it's not a good idea to take Marijuana or any drug to a communist country and saying, “I didn't know it was there” is not the best defense.  Also, this is not a sports story.  It is definitely a political story.  Why do I leave it in?  Because the Senator… and maybe he's doing this on purpose and I'm a naive Moron, but he says her name is… you know what, I'm going to let you find out.  I hope you think it's worth it and thank you for listening to the Modern Moron… Okay, enough from us Morons about the planet.  Here is Carl Sagan, and I'm assuming you know and remember if but if not, he was an American astronomer, planetary scientist, cosmologist, astrophysicist, astrobiologist, author, and science communicator.  He spent the majority of his career at Cornell University where he was the David Duncan Professor of Astronomy and Space Sciences. He published more than 600 scientific papers and articles and was author, co-author or editor of more than 20 books.  He also argued the hypothesis, that has since been accepted, that the high surface temperatures of Venus can be attributed to, and calculated using, the greenhouse effect.  Here he is from the original series Cosmos on PBS in 1980, over 40 years ago… Now, here is Neil deGras Tyson.  If you've not heard of him I'm very surprised, but he is an American astrophysicist, author, and science communicator. He studied at Harvard University, the University of Texas at Austin, and Columbia University. From 1991 to 1994, he was a postdoctoral research associate at Princeton University.  His resume goes on and on with published papers and books, from 2006 to 2011 he was the host of the television series NOVA.  In 2014 he hosted the television series Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey, which he called a “continuation” of astronomer Carl Sagan's popular series Cosmos from 1980.  Here he is talking about Carbon Dioxide in our atmosphere.  If there wasn't any, the earth would freeze, but if there is too much, it warms the planet…the background music from the program may make it a little difficult to hear…  Next he talks about the amount of carbon thrust into our atmosphere from volcanoes and compares that to the carbon from fossil fuels… Not even 2% of the carbon spewed into the atmosphere from volcanoes is contributing to the 30 billion tons civilization cranks out every year for decades.  And we wonder why this problem is accelerating? Finally here is Mr. Tyson in an interview with Larry King from 2015 on politics and science… “The end of an informed democracy.”   The all mighty dollar-slash-strong-economy is more important than the air we breath.  I can't help thinking about the 10 Commandments movie when Moses comes back down from the mountain and what does he see?  He's like, “what the hell's going on down here?” It's just a bunch of goddamn dopamine addicts!  Worshiping false gods in the form of cars and McMansions and private jets and swipe right on your electronic devices that need to be replaced every black Friday.  Only instead of a golden calf, it's a bunch of rectangular pieces of paper with pictures of dead presidents on them.  Speaking of that golden calf, who loves gold more than anyone and wants you to know it? And here's another irony for you: most of those right wing, gun toting whiteys who are afraid of losing our privileged status in this country are also bible thumpers.  Apparently we aren't reading the bible we're thumping. You really should watch this old movie next Passover-slash-Easter.  This was a film of our generation and during the orgie scene there is a tug of war with two guys who each have a woman's arm and they're pulling her in different directions so they can rape her.  And what has she been directed to do by Cecil B. Demille?  She's laughing!... “Oh, you two are incorrigible!”  This was a time when you were told, “When they say no?  They really mean yes.”  And that's how this scene is played… there's another big brute who literally has a woman under each arm and he's carrying them both off and they're laughing and just having a ball.  Rape is fun!  Or it sure seemed so back the good old Biblical times of Moses 6,000 short years ago.   And one of the great period actors of the time, Edgar G. Robinson comes in to challenge Moses… yeah see, you wrote them commandment yourself see, right behind the water cooler see?  I saw ya do it see? Wow, what a rabbit  hole!  What the hell was I talking about?... Science!  Scientists, that's right!  How did I got into the Bible when I'm supposed to be talking a bout Science and the Scientific book of Revelations we are experiencing!  (Yay)   CLOSE -  Wow… I had every intention of getting back to my conversation with the Senator but me and those rabbit holes I go down.  I think I mentioned in the opening that we talked about the Britney Griner situation and how the United States is trading a murderous arms dealer for a basketball player who “forgot” that she had pot in her suitcase.  There's obviously more to it than that, but when the senator brings it up he can't remember her name and refers to Britney Griner as Gloria Gaynor… the singer.   Maybe I'll go back and find that for ya.   Also, I don't want to leave you with total gloom, doom and despair.  This is our old friend Al Gore, who the Senator said was right when he was in France, on our ability to change… Let's hope he's right.  Another story about conserving water is in South Africa.  I think I've mentioned it but the drought there in 2018 was so serious they were looking at a “day zero”- the moment when some four million inhabitants would be left without water.  It's almost four years since it edged dangerously towards that day.   "We underestimate the ability of citizens to adapt to a crisis," said Dr Kevin Winter, an environmental expert at the University of Cape Town. He points out that the city's water consumption nearly halved in the space of just three weeks in early 2018, from roughly 780 megalitres per day to under 550, before sinking even lower. An extraordinary display of public unity. That's something we don't see too often or at least we don't see it broadcast, published or tweeted, but we Americans are going to need some extraordinary displays of public unity.  I wonder what it's going to take? I also wonder if I could make another podcast episode that is more preachy and self righteous as this one.  I think I may have out done myself.  Or out Moron'd myself. Here's something I rarely do, I'm going to promote my upcoming episode.  If you thought this episode was a downer, you should find the next episode uplifting.  In stead of science we're going with divine intervention as my guest is a real live seminarian from the Catholic Church!  Yeah, that one!  The original OG.  Old Gangsta or Old God?  We have a pretty spirited conversation, pun intended, and if nothing else I think you'll love his enthusiasm, he's not jaded yet by papal politics.  I think I ask him if he plans to run for Pope, but I don't remember now.  I think you'll find it interesting and I hope you will tune in or download the next episode with a Father to be… not that kind.  Thank you for listening to The MM…  Trump Tower's New Bar Sells $45 Presidential-Themed Cocktails -  Forbes.com  Carl Sagan - Wikipedia   Neil deGrasse Tyson - Wikipedia  Cape Town's Day Zero: 'We are axing trees to save water' - BBC News

Welcome to another episode of TMM…where you can also find us at “The Old Man-dot-show”... try it!  Also,  happy post 4th of July.  I have WAY too many tabs open in my browser most of the time.  It's as cluttered and messy as the rest of my house.  I leave these tabs open because I think they contain something I want ot share with you, which is another way of saying something I want to complain, rant or brag about.   I have a few items I'd like to complain about before hopefully getting to something hopeful. Item #1: Forth of July Message from California's Governor Gavin Newsome 4th of July message: In it he starts off by saying let's talk… translation: let me talk… about what's going on in America… translation: let me bag on Florida Governor Ron…ald McDonald Desantis.  Governor Newsome, don't start off saying you want to talk about America and then attack another Governor, the images contained Desantis and the graphics were about Desantis.  It's this kind of rhetoric that actually contributes to the divisiveness in our country and it is not taking the high road.  Mean what you say and say what you mean.  In other words, if you tell your citizens to wear masks, YOU wear a mask.  Even in Napa Valley. Don't get me wrong,  I am not defending Wrong Desantis.  I am NOT a fan of that egomaniac.  However… of the numerous laws Desantis has signed, the “Parental Rights in Education law, which prohibits discussion of sexual orientation or gender identity in kindergarten through third grade classrooms.”  This is going to sound like I'm a crazy conservative, but is that all that bad?  Kindergarten through 3rd grade.  Four and five year olds to what… eight years old?  There shouldn't be ANY sexual education talk of ANY kind in those grades, should there?  What a great bargaining chip to use to look for compromise.  And if there's a kid having sexual identity issues in those grades, can't we deal with it on a case by case basis with some compassion?  Do we need a law for that.  My recollection of grade school was a one night presentation with fathers and sons in attendance in the auditorium.  That was it.  My biggest takeaway from that was on the ride home I was able to get away with saying the F-word in front of my dad.  And I said it with a little pause before adding the “i-n-g” so it seemed like I didn't even now how to pronounce it.  And my dad said, “yes, yes.  This is fucking.”  Man, I felt so victorious that night.  I'd pulled a major coupe.   Back to Gavin Gruesome… at the end of his message talking about America… if America was Flrorida, he invites Floridians to join us here in California.  Hey Gavin, we've got 39 million people in this state plus a housing crisis.  And you want more people to come to California?  Seriously?  We're driving wealthy residents out of the state and you want to bring disenfranchised poor Floridians to California?  You think the rich ones that can afford housing on the beach in Miami are going to come?  No.  We'll have even more homeless….oops, unhoused people than we already have.  Why?  So you can win your reelection campaign?  That's who paid for the message by the way. Silicon valley isn't the only place where businesses are leaving California.  I'll get a Netflix, Stranger Things plug in here and I'm sure that if you've been watching Stranger Things you don't watch the credits.  You think that show was shot in Hollywood?  Even the scenes that were supposed to take place in Los Angeles were filmed in and around Albuquerque New Mexico where a LOT of productions take place as well as Wilmington, North Carolina and Vancouver, British Columbia for that matter.  And it's rarely for the landscapes.  I'm sure you know that Southern California can provide damn near any landscape you want, except maybe a rainforest. Heck that's what a soundstage is for.  So, there's a whole other industry besides high tech that has left California.   Okay, see how my rants just swirl around and don't' really go anywhere? (toilet)  I guess if I had a point, it's that California's Governor shouldn't be inviting a population to come to California when we can't house the ones we have already.  And if it was a political stunt for his reelection campaign and he's calling out Florida's Goofy Governor “Wrong” DeSantis, then I'd have to go with “Shame on You Gavin Gruesome”.  Chucking barbs at your opponent or the other party is just perpetuating the horrible divisiveness we're already bogged down in.  Find another way to craft your message. What was I talking about? See?  Okay, horrible politicians on the left and right. All that for only item #1! Item #2: C.S. Lewis and Lewis Carroll are not the same person. I obviously have way too much computer time.  I try to keep my daughter from it but at the same time I can spend hours sitting in front of my computer… accomplishing, what?  Am I fooling myself into thinking I'm educating myself? To what end?  So I can take some information that's little more than trivia, and regurgitate it in a conversation (or a podcast) to make people think I'm educated and worldly?  Please.  So here's how I went from C.S. Lewis to Lewis Carrol to the Beatles to The Animals to… what?  It really led to nothing. I was initially trying to find the origin of the saying, “Don't judge a person before walking a mile in their shoes.”  I still don't think I have it but it led me to some very random places.  The oldest origin I found was from a Native American prayer that goes: “Great Spirit — Grant that I may not criticize my neighbor until I have walked a mile in his moccasins.” While that rabbit hole didn't lead me to a satisfying end it somehow got me on to C.S. Lewis and the Christian metaphors he used in his books, specifically “The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe”.  But instead of C.S. Lewis, I thought it was Lewis Carrol who wrote Alice in Wonderland, no… Through the Looking Glass.  And in that book, Tweedledee and Tweedledum, who would be perfect guests for this show, recite the poem, “The Walrus and The Carpenter” to Alice… The poem tells of the Walrus and the Carpenter luring young oysters out of their beds and on to the shore where they are all eaten by the Walrus and the Carpenter, even when one of the older oysters warns them.  In the Disney movie the Walrus eats all of the oysters and the Carpenter doesn't get any.  In the book it appears both eat some of the oysters but it appears the Walrus gets most of them.  Their untimely end comes when the Walrus says:  "The time has come," the Walrus said,  "To talk of many things: Of shoes—and ships—and sealing-wax— Of cabbages—and kings— And why the sea is boiling hot—    And whether pigs have wings." "But wait a bit," the Oysters cried,  "Before we have our chat; For some of us are out of breath,  And all of us are fat!" "No hurry!" said the Carpenter.  They thanked him much for that. Even there at the end of that stanza the Carpenter cuts them some slack.  Many have analyzed Carrol's work to look for hidden meaning an metaphor including the Walrus and the Carpenter represents Communism vs. Capitalism or that one represents Christianity and Western religion while the other represents Buddhism and Eastern Religion OR… that Lewis Carrol did drugs when he wrote Alice in Wonderland.  The general consensus on that is NO, he was simply writing for children to entertain them and their imaginations. If fact, one of the illustrators for a later edition of the book said that the original illustrator had the choice of a butterfly, a carpenter or a baronet (the holder of a rank of honor below a baron and above a knight, oh my god the rabbit holes people, I'm gonna break an ankle).  Because,  you see, butterfly, carpenter and baronet all have the same number of syllables and would keep the cadence of the poem. But what I did find interesting is that The Walrus from the poem is what John Lennon refers to in the Beatles, “I am The Walrus” from their Magical Mystery Tour Album, and if I play one second of that song this whole episode will get deleted from most platforms it's published.    Oops! Her is an excerpt from the 1980 Playboy magazine interview with John Lennon:  LENNON: "The first line was written on one acid trip one weekend. The second line was written on the next acid trip the next weekend…  PLAYBOY: "What about the walrus itself?" LENNON: "It's from 'The Walrus and the Carpenter.' 'Alice in Wonderland.' To me, it was a beautiful poem. It never dawned on me that Lewis Carroll was commenting on the capitalist and social system. I never went into that bit about what he really meant, like people are doing with the Beatles' work. Later, I went back and looked at it and realized that the walrus was the bad guy in the story and the carpenter was the good guy. I thought, Oh, shit, I picked the wrong guy. I should have said, 'I am the carpenter.' But that wouldn't have been the same, would it? (singing) 'I am the carpenter....'" So this got me to thinking if John was the Walrus from a Lewis Carroll peom, then who is the eggman?  It turns out the Eggman is Eric Burdon.  Please don't say who is Eric Burdon.  Did you just say who is Eric Burdon?  Shame on you.  How about Eric Burdon and The Animals, does that sound more familiar?  How about the band WAR?  That Eric Burdon, who Rolling Stone named #57 on their list of top 100 Greatest Singers of All Time.   Why is Eric Burdon the eggman?  Apparently, Mr. Burdon had this sexual fetish that involved cracking a raw egg and I won't get into anymore details on that.  However, Eric relayed the story to John Lennon and Lennon nicknamed Eric “Eggman” as in, “go get it Eggman.” How's that for a rabbit hole? The rabbit hole continued by the way as I found an interview of John Lennon speaking of the Beatles songs he liked personally… It also led me to this bit from Lennon not long before his assassination on being 40, on not being the person his fans wanted him to be, on what it's like being in your 20's and having people hang on your every word Basically the message is that we all need the time to grow out of our misconceptions about life.  Many teens and twenty-somethings are full of energy and piss and vinegar and it lacks focus and direction because they haven't figured it out yet.  It comes with a lot of frustration and even anger.  And the last thing this age group needs, particularly males… particularly white males… are guns… particularly assault rifles.  I had to do it, didn't I?  I had to ruin a nice nostalgic romp by bringing in politics.   Here it is: you shouldn't be allowed to purchase a gun, particularly an assault style weapon until you are 25 and here's why: leave it to experts in assessing risk and see what they do.  The insurance industry.  They don't let anyone rent a car until they're 25 years old.  Why?  Because when it comes to a vehicle that travels at high speeds and can kill someone, they are relatively irresponsible, they make bad decisions and they are a bad risk when it comes to renting a car.  Bad risk, bad business decision, so they don't do it.  No one complains about that.  It's a fact of life and it's common sense.  So do the same with guns. And you might say: “Oh but I can get drafted and then they GIVE me a gun!  Very, very different situation. 1) they train you very specifically and thoroughly on the use of said weapon, 2)  You are not allowed to carry it around wherever you go unless, #3) You are going into combat where there will be many others with the same weapons.  It's called our military or militia which we did not have… at all, when the 2nd amendment was written, including all that stuff I said in another episode about how many shots could be fired per minute when the 2nd amendment was written.  It's 3 shots per minute by the way, maybe 4 if you're an expert at reloading a musket.  Not 40 or 60 or 100 or whatever number you come up with.  Okay, I apologize for ruining a nice story about a poem with politics.  Actually, the first story was about politics too only I was mainly bagging on the other party.  I try to be an equal opportunity offender. Well, I might as well make it three for three…  ITEM #3: the Saturday Night Massacre - What the heck was that?  I'm sure you guys know because you're not morons but I had never heard of it and it was brought up as a parallel to the January 6th shenanigans of our former idiot in chief Donald Dump.  On October 20th 1973 Nixon ORDERED his Attorney General AND his Deputy AG to fire the guy investigating the Watergate break-in.  Not only did they not fire him, they both resigned in protest which left the role of attorney general to the Solicitor General.  This poor bastard went along with Nixon's  request and fired the special prosecutor Cox. Less than a half hour later, the White House sent FBI agents to shut down the offices of the Special Prosecutor, AND the Attorney General AND Deputy Attorney General.  Can you believe that shit? Well, the 1970's version of the internet blew up, that being Western Union telegraph.  Have any of you ever sent a telegram?  Me neither.  Over 50,000 telegrams came in to Washington DC from citizens.  I wonder what the equivalent number of tweets would be?  Members of Congress, presumably democrats, called for Nixon's impeachment.  So… Nixon had to appoint another prosecutor for the Watergate scandal named Leon Jaworski, remember that name?  No, not the Eagles quarterback, that's Ron Jaworski.  Well, Jaworski pressed for the release of those tricky Dick tape recordings… the one's that mysteriously had like 17 minutes missing?  And he got them released and the following August tricky Dick took a final trip… home… Touching.  Well, it appears our favorite reality show president, how's that for irony,  literally held an episode of the apprentice in the oval office and considered pulling the same stunt.  He had his AG and his Deputy AG along with the nutty  environmental attorney Jeffrey Clark.  Clark is the one that was told to go back to his office and they would call him when there's an oil spill.  Trump was told he would face massive resignations and he knew this Clark guy would not make it happen for Donny boy.  But it's an interesting parallel between the teflon Don and tricky Dick. ITEM #4: NPR wants you to make them your only news source.  I heard this just a few minutes ago.  No Emmie Martinez No, Ari Shapiro.  And even a no to, “Oh goodness gracious It's Scott Simon”.  The days of trusting one news source is gone and if you are using only one news source, then shame on you.  Go and read some news from a site that's a little bit to the right or left of where you normally sit in your comfort zone.  But no single news sources anymore unfortunately. Wow, I got through that last one pretty efficiently. CLOSE - In closing, I think one thing is very obvious…  I need to find guests for this show.  Otherwise It's too much.  Too much of me, too much opinion, and way too much work.  At least twice as much work, probably more and it's not as enjoyable for either of us.   Also… an addendum to try and correct my moronoscity, did a quick search and it seems you can rent a car if you are under 25 these days, but you will pay a premium to do so.  Drivers under the age of 25 can expect to pay an “underage fee” and depending on the location that is around $25 to $30 a day which adds up.  But the rationale is the same: younger drivers are less experienced at driving (or life) and and are more likely to take risks and this holds especially for males as they are generally more likely to take risks in terms of health and the enjoyment expected from risky activities.  See the University of Pennsylvania research paper at the end of the credits… sorry to blather on so long, see you next time!   John Lennon Interview: Playboy 1980 (Page 3) - Beatlesinterviews.org  What Was the Saturday Night Massacre? -  History.com How Old Do You Have To Be To Rent A Car? -  jdpower.com Gender Differences in Risk Assessment: Why do Women Take Fewer Risks than Men? - University of Pennsylvania  Music by Coma-Media from Pixabay

My guest has been on the show once before along with the senator and we refer to him as Templeton, as in form Charlotte's Web. We've been besties since high school where we were both relatively scrawny, neither of us was on any sports teams but we hung out with a couple of the jocks.  We took a bunch of the same college classes together and always talked about our own business partnership firm being called “Wrong and Wronger” and then fill in the blank after that… wrong and wronger accounting firm, wrong and wronger legal consultants, wrong and wronger construction company, you get the idea… whatever we did we would kinda screw it up. His idol back in high school was Woody Allen.  Not the pervert Woody Allen, but the Woody Allen that brought us Annie Hall, Play It Again Sam, Manhattan, Sleeper, Bananas, Take The Money and Run.  Unfortunately today we can't separate Woody Allen from his sickness, but his work in the 60's 70's and 80's alone was incredible and that… for very understandable reasons is why Woody was my friend's idol.  Here Woody in an interview from 1971…  But what Templeton was always good at, and still is, he's good at recruiting people into some kind of scheme, like in our 20's we played a LOT of softball.  He would recruit a couple of ringers and then get us into a D-league where he would say, “guaranteed sweatshirt”, like that was something to covet… a D-league softball champions sweatshirt.  So he's always been known to have some sort of scheme going, an angle or something (bite) We've been roommates, At parties and night clubs we were always, always the wallflowers, and I got to be best man at his wedding.  His wife has been a teacher for over thirty years in the public school system… no easy feat.  She retired on Friday of last week and we talk about what it takes to be teacher, how highly our society values teachers… at least we say we do, it just isn't reflected in their paychecks. We also talk about our equally… well almost equal ineptitude at being handy around the house.  Usually he has the good sense to not even try whereas my ego sends me to Lowe's three times in one day and half a day just to complete a task that a normal human would complete in an hour.  This time, however, Templeton has me beat and he shares his misfortune. One of the main things Templeton is absolutely beloved for is in the way he butchers the english language.  I have several friends that do that including the senator…. But Templeton does it in a magical way that kept him with his business partner for over 30 years.  I don't think he quite demonstrates it fully in this conversation, and if he does I don't call him out on it, but his usual response is, “You know what I meant”. As we start our conversation he is somehow under the impression that we are not recording yet and that at some point we are going to “go live”.  I don't think any podcast is live, otherwise it would be a webcast wouldn't it? A husband brags about a retiring school teacher and how NOT to change lightbulb on The Modern Moron, and thanks for listening. CLOSE - Congratulations on 34 years of teaching our little one's.  Enjoy a great retirement.  Before we part ways I want to keep trying to have a little segment called Moron Chaplaincy or maybe I have to set aside whole episodes for that, but I wanted to tell you about one very small, incident that I thought was going to be fairly routine but it wasn't.  Maybe that's one of the things I like about Chaplaincy in a hospital, sooner or later you get something unique, as long as your paying attention.   So I'm making my rounds a few weeks ago and usually the door to the patients rooms are open so I can knock gently on the door and see if they're up for a visit.  If the door is closed I figure one or both of the patients don't want to be disturbed.  For some reason, I knocked on a closed door, opened it and walked into a room with one patient in it.  The patient was quite literally chained to his bed.  With a chain.  Not a strap or restraint, but a chain.  And sitting with the patient are two Highway patrol, or if you're not in California a State Trooper.  One of them might have been a county Sheriff.  I've opened the door and stuck my head in and actually am halfway in the room.  So I said something to the effect of, “hey, what's up?”  One of the officers stands up and turns to address me so I introduce myself, ‘hello, I'm Charlie the Chaplain or whatever, I didn't say that.  But I did identify myself and the officer said it would be fine if I visited the “patient”.  So I cross the room, I pull up a chair, and I sit with this guy, a pretty good sized guy… Are you feeling any pain? Where are you from? Does your family know you're here? Not much of a conversation.  I asked him if it would  be alright if I prayed for him.  He said yes.  By the way I'm not big on prayer myself but if it's for someone else and they value it, which some really do, I'm happy to do that.   As I was leaving that room and walking down the hall, I thought of that incredibly sad hospital room.  And it wasn't just the patient chained to his own bed.  Were either of those two officers realizing their full potential sitting in that room all… day… long.  Staring and scrolling on their phone.  Is that what they imagined when they decided to get into law enforcement?  I doubt it.  I felt bad for everyone in that room. What made me think of this is that today, I'm in one of the units, I'm walking down the all and I'm behind two law officers again.  You do see officers around a hospital, particularly the ER Department and the front desk perhaps but not usually IN the hospital.  So now I look past the two officers and I see a guy with gray hair, who I think is shuffling along because, that's what patients do in hospitals who have just had surgery and many times they've got their IV stand they're pushing along beside them.  This guy has all that and he's shackled AND he's got some contraption around his waist that looks like they've got big brick sized batteries on his sides.  AND, there's another officer in front of him.  This could have been Hannibal Lecter Junior for all I know.  What gray haired man need three armed guards around him when he's already shackled?  Jesus, I'm lucky I still have a face.   Music: "Lightless Dawn" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com); Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License; http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Welcome to another episode of TMM… In this episode we finish my chat with my friend and comedian Christine Lederman, but as usual I want to cover a couple of things first. One is from an article in the Wall Street Journal from Sunday June 12th.  I have to recommend the Wall Street Journal.  You should at least get the online version plus the Sunday/weekend edition and here's why: 1) it's a very credible conservative news source, so if you're a conservative I don't need to convince you.  If you're a liberal and your bias against this paper then you're being exactly what you complain about.  People need to be more open minded and accepting of others lifestyles and opinions.  I agree.  Start by reading something that may take you outside your comfort zone.  2)  Senior Moron discount!  I'm currently getting the digital version of the Journal app plus I get the paper on Sunday morning which is very nice to nostalgically read an actual newspaper and since it's the Wall Street Journal it leads me to 3)  I feel like a grown up reading the paper on Sunday morning. Back to the article - this is moron curmudgeon stuff too… the title is: “The Age of Emotional Overstatement - From social media to job applications, the pressure to declare our feelings in public is turning us into gushing adolescents.”  If you remember the beginning of last episode, Christine mentioned how hard it is to get kids to hire and actually show up for work because they are in constant need of mental health days.  In a sense we parents are responsible for that mentality.  When they were kids playing soccer or whatever sport, everyone had to get a trophy… and every kid had to have a speech made about what a gift they were to the team and with 95% of the kids, they forgot the goddamn plastic trophy when we left the pizza place.  Seriously.  It's ridiculous and with all the value that team sports provides, we ruin it by giving everyone a trophy.  Please knock that shit off with our grandchildren.  That's not how life works. Back to the article, she recounts a birthday wish from one of her fellow 21st century parents that posted on social media… “Happy 17th Birthday, Miles!” reads the typical parent-to-offspring entry. A previous generation might have stopped there, deeming the well-wishing sufficient acknowledgment of the day. But today's parent has only just begun her tribute to the sunshine golden star-child who grew into the brilliant, gorgeous, side-splittingly funny, preternaturally gifted athlete (‘Go, Big Blue!'), not to mention the kindest person upon this earth as well as the head of the yearbook committee, who is loved “to the moon and infinity and back and to infinity again and to whatever lies beyond infinity…”  We can't just say happy birthday anymore, it's got to be this ridiculously syrupy emotional outpouring and it  has GOT to be made public so everyone can see how grateful I am.  This Sunday's Journal… as in June 19th 2022, has a couple of articles that caught my eye… one from the “intelligent investor”, Jason Zweig, titled “To Stand Up  to a Bear Market, Act Cool- and Act Your Age” meaning, if you're young don't sweat this depression- recession- stagflation or whatever the hell you want to call it.  Still invest slowly and regularly.  In fact ‘Ol Warren Buffet says this is the best time to buy, when prices are going down.  Quote, “if you like hamburgers, you want the price of hamburgers to go down not up.” So have your kids and grandkids look at this as a great time to start investing when prices are low or going to be lower.  It's us old farts that need to worry because we are about to make those investments part of our annual income.   I'm sure If  you're thinking of retiring in the next couple of years, you have been giving it second thoughts.  Another interesting tip from this article is: If you're going to retire anyway, think about retiring without drawing your social security.  Can you do that?  I think so.  They advise delaying Social Security until 70… if you can pull that off.  The reason is that the fed will increase your benefits based on inflation and your eventual SS check once you start.  The more you can put it off the better your payout will be once you need it, “need” being the operative word.   Another tip to note is that with the prime interest rate going up, the yields on income-producing assets are going up as well.  What the hell is an income-producing asset?  Hell if I know… some to learn more about might be rental properties, which could be a pain in  the ass unless you employ a property management company or you could invest in Property management companies themselves…OnlineMarketplaces.com suggests “Rightmove” and “onthemarket” which are both on the London exchange, there's another in Germany called Scout24.  Obviously I'm talking outta my ass and if you have any kind of a stock portfolio you would never take advice from a Moron, but you could check with your professional investor and see what they think.  This would be a perfect topic for the Senator, and I'll get him on eventually. Also, safer and therefore lower yield investments might be something like Certificates of Deposit which should have higher yields than the last five years as interest rates have gone up and will probably continue to go up.  The problem with CD's for a moron like me is that CD's are usually sold in blocks of $10,000 which I would never have but if you're the Senator you'd have that much just to buy a puppy. Okay… I can't believe I talked that much about finance.  And i wonder if you thought for a half second, “wow, sounds like he might know what he's talking about.”  I do not.  Can you imagine the level of bullsh*t you get from so called experts in the field whose main goal is to make you think that?  That they're an expert and you should hang on their every word.  Remember Jim Cramer?  That investor guy who used to be on CNBC… he had a show called “The Street” and he would hit buzzers and bells over stock buys and he always had his sleeves rolled up to make you think he was a hard working joe like the rest of us.  Remember him?  There was the housing bubble of 2007 and then the Fanny Mae Freddy Mac business and then in 2008 Cramer said that Bear Stearns, one of the biggest investment banks in the world, was doing fine… … and then the following week they collapsed.  Hell I can do that.  The Modern Moron Investment Firm.  We make money the old fashioned way, we burn it.   Man I can talk can't I?  There's no one to shut me up, which is why I need guests.  Like my guest Christine Lederman.   We pick up where I ask her about a nice little romance she had during quarantine in her condo complex which leads us to a conversation about the house she recently purchased, home improvement projects and how they are never finished and she painted the interior and then… she catches us in the midst of a boring conversation and she puts the brakes on home improvement talk.  Thank God… Where was she when we needed her in the middle of this intro.  So… Pandemic fling, home improvement, movies we've seen recently and a discussion about movie candies… what's your favorite and do you buy them at the movie theater or do you stop at the drug store and get candy like this Moron? Investments, flings, movie candies and other things on The Modern Moron… and thank you for listening. CLOSE - I forgot to tell you we talked about Johnny Depp and Top Gun for about a minute, sorry about that.   We are going to keep tabs on Christine's standup schedule this fall and if you're in the Denver/ Boulder area you can probably catch her workshopping parts of her upcoming show.   Wouldn't it be great if she just exploded on the comedy scene and we can all say I remember when she did that podcast.  It could happen you gus.  As always thank you for listening, please forward this to someone you think would enjoy it or to someone who would hate it but tell them you think they'd love it.  It'll be fun, try it… see you next time.

Welcome to another episode of the MM… this was supposed to be an easy-peazy light episode with my friend and stand up comedian Christine Lederman.  Until… I decided to include something that I felt looked at both sides of the 2nd amendment-slash-gun violence issue that,  along with some other issues, you can throw on the pile of burning tires that divides this country right now.  And it has taken me a week to calm down enough to try again.  I do this tiny podcast for the half dozen or so of us because I have fun doing it, I find some interesting people and stuff and I really am at a crossroads of being a complete shut-in that does not want to engage at all with our civilization as it has  become and another part of me that wants to be able to stay connected in some way.  So  to do that I have to read, watch and listen to the news with a sense of curiosity rather than with an opinion.  I'm really trying to get rid of my opinions that have collected like in a garage that can't fit a car inside it anymore.  You ever see garages like that?  Maybe you have one. So the guns issue.  Selfishly, i think the thing that pisses me off is that I can't use this anymore… I love the ol' machine gun sound effect as a symbol of over reacting to trivial matters.  If I owned an assault rifle, I would probably be sharing with you how I went off on my dishwasher, or my weed eater or my garage door opener… some inanimate item that is the object of my wrath.  But I can't do that anymore because of the right to bear arms… the 2nd amendment written in 1791.  Couple of things to note about 1791: The population density of the entire country or colonies was the same as the city of Los Angeles or the State of Connecticut.  Many folks needed guns to acquire protein. The most common guns were muskets and flintlock pistols The most skilled hunters and marksmen could load from the muzzle of the weapon, fire, reload and fire again about every 20 seconds, maybe 15 seconds… so three to four rounds per minute. Those firearms were highly inaccurate.  They didn't use bullets shaped for aerodynamics that would rotate to keep their aim true.  They were musket balls, which does not refer to the genitalia of a male muskrat.  I said musKET balls.  They did not fly true at all. I feel like there is a silent majority of conservatives, I know there is because I talk to them.  Maybe they voted for Trump, but were embarrassed to say so, because… you should be embarrassed of him and his lack of integrity.  Most of these silent majority wish he would just go away.  They also believe in the right for a woman to  choose but don't want to speak up because it goes against their faith tradition.  Most of the republican or conservatives I know maintain their political viewpoint for fiscal reasons and fiscal policy.  “Run your government like you run a household.  Don't spend more than you have and if you borrow money, have a plan to pay it back.  Balance the budge, blah, blah, blah.”  But when it comes to social policy, they're reasonably positioned.  But to speak out in the midst of your contemporaries, and I'm using air quotes, “just isn't worth it.”  And over and over, the right to keep these automatic weapons and assault rifles is a more important right than the right of a kid to be able to go to school without having to be concerned about being shot, murdered, having their friends murdered, etc.  Because it radiates out.  Imagine how it radiates out from Uvalde, Texas and that school district.  All the schools across the country who have to reestablish and practice their active shooter drills, with 5, 6 and 7 year olds asking, “why do we have to sit in this closet and keep quiet for how long?”  And someone has to explain that to them and not bullshit them by making it some kind of a game.  I want to bring to your attention a couple of articles on the recent shootings and the two groups of frightened people who either fear they or their children will be the next victim of a mass shooting because there are too many assault rifles or the frightened people who think there aren't enough assault rifles to combat the assault rifles. I'm absolutely enraged as you probably are of the lack of functionality of our government, their inability to compromise and the … and I have deleted so many expletives today; group of people that subscribe to the “bad guy with a gun needs more good guys with guns” philosophy.  I mean I'm having trouble sitting still in my chair to write and outline of what I want to say after listening to complaints about how 120 gun laws don't work so one more isn't going to help.  The reason we have to have 120 gun laws in the first place is because you gun toting idiots dig your heels in and won't allow one or even a couple of thorough laws get passed because you're either afraid the russians are coming over the hill or there's going to be Marshall law declared so you need your guns to protect your families but those guns are actually killing each other's families.  Go drink a pot of coffee on an empty stomach and that's how I feel right now, it's that bad. However… I do have an interview-slash-article… from a gun advocate… that I feel is worth listening to if you are opposed to guns as I obviously am.  It's abo I also have an article for those who are in favor of fewer guns, guns, guns and I'll get to that one later. This first interview is from NPR, yes it's left leaning, but it felt like at least it was an intelligent conversation… to me.  The interviewee is David French who is the  senior editor of “The Dispatch” which is a subscription-based and advertisement-free online magazine.  Mediabiasfactcheck.com puts them as a right-center bias publication with a HIGH factual reporting credibility.  They are NOT as far to the right as say Fox News which has a MIXED factual reporting credibility.  David French is also a contributing writer at The Atlantic which is a HIGH credibility LEFT bias monthly magazine.  This cat went to Harvard Law School where he graduated with honors.  I know I wouldn't want to have a debate with him.  He is in favor of a concept called red flag laws that allow the proper authorities to reclaim or seize guns from those deemed to be a threat to the public or themselves by a similar legal procedure as getting a restraining order.   I make a confession of an odd purchase for me in the form of a deck of tarot cards.  What?  I know, but Christine is the perfect person to confess this too because she is very much under the impression that she has psychic abilities.  Not only that but she will also tell you that the reason her intuitions about me are completely wrong is because I don't believe she has “the gift.”  So, it's all my fault.  She proceeds to prove her inaccuracies during our call but I think we might have a regular segment called the psychic eye of Queen Christine.  Something like that.  We start our conversation with me inquiring about the hotel business and what seems to be the overall difficulty in our culture these days to get people to want to come back to work… CLOSE - That was a kind of weird episode right?  Too much politics at the top and then tarot cards?  A couple of things before we part ways… as of the recording of this episode The Modern Moron is exactly 14 downloads away from it's 10,000th download.  Doesn't that sound impressive?  Let me put a little perspective on that huge, huge milestone…  California Has America's Toughest Gun Laws, and They Work - New York Times/ Yahoo Red flag laws, not gun control, are the way to stop mass shootings, proponent says - NPR   What Firearms Looked Like In 1791 - Ranker.com  

Open - So I have begun to  volunteer at a local Hospital which is also a trauma center.  What separates a  trauma center from a regular hospital?  I look at it the same way you might look at the difference between a four star and a five star hotel.  A five star hotel needs two dining rooms, one formal, and I believe 24 hour room service and concierge service… probably some other stuff. According to https://hospitalmedicaldirector.com/ which is a blog about hospital medical directors:  A level 1 trauma center must have a trauma/general surgeon in the hospital 24-hours a day, along with an anesthesiologist and a full O-R staff available in the hospital 24-hours a day as well as a critical care physician 24-hours a day.   There must also be immediate availability of an orthopedic surgeon, neurosurgeon, radiologist, plastic surgeon, and oral/maxillofacial surgeon. There must be > 1,200 trauma admissions per year.  There are also requirements for the number of hours these surgeons and physicians must have each year.     Finally, These centers must participate in research and have at least 20 publications per year. The main difference between a 1 one and a level 2 trauma center is primarily the lack of research and publication requirements. So, I have just barely started volunteering in one of California's 17 Level I trauma centers.  So far, I go on only one day a week and I shadow one of the current 6 or so resident chaplains.  There are some chaplains that are stationed on a particular floor as well, along with another set of chaplains that deal with palliative care, but that's another kettle of fish altogether.  Is it inappropriate to refer to palliative care as a “kettle of fish”?  I hope not, but you know there are always going to be people who are offended by something so… insert expletive.  You may be thinking at this point… “what?  Why?  Why would a moron want to do something like this?”  Great question.  I have no idea.  Actually I do… The thick of the pandemic.  Lost a patient from Covid Case Investigation work.  Not just a case number. I had to write an essay.  So, knowing that i am NOT a religious person, how do I write an essay about being a chaplain, with no religious foundation? What is my faith tradition?  Spiritual tradition:  Catholic High school.  1 year at Catholic College. Studied Buddhism and attended service regularly in Los Angeles (Shin Buddhist) I definitely drank the kool-aid of Improvisational theater.  Don't underestimate this.  In fact, it probably gave me the most valuable tool in doing some of this work so far. CLOSE - In conclusion… I hope to be able to provide some insight, some reflections of my experiences and who knows maybe even a guest or two!  I don't know how long I will be permitted to be a volunteer before they find out I'm a moron and a heathen, but so far it's been a very positive experience. Coming up in future Modern Moron episodes, I will be speaking to my college graduate who has a degree in art history, and we will be discussing a VERY interesting 2018 documentary called “The Price of Everything”.  The film features interviews with people prominently involved in contemporary art and the market for it and it is fascinating.  The title of the film comes from a quote from the 1892 Oscar Wilde play “Lady Windermere's Fan”.  The quote is delivered in the film by art collector Stefan Edlis: "There are a lot of people who know the price of everything and the value of nothing".  Chew on that for a while, right?   Also, in line with The Modern Moron remaining on the cutting edge of technology and pop culture, I just bought an air fryer and I simply must tell you about my favorite dishes.   Until next time, thank you for listening to The Modern Moron, please forward this episode to someone you think would like it, or to someone you think would hate it as a joke.  Thanks.

OPEN - Welcome to another episode of the Modern Moron and another very… long… intro.  We all could use a little respite from Russia's violent invasion of Ukraine, not as much as the people of Ukraine could use it, but you get the idea.  So why not turn to the entertainment industry?  How about the Oscars?  Let's watch Hollywood celebrate itself.  Of course you know where I'm going with this and that is the incident where Will Smith walked on stage and slapped comedian Chris Rock after Rock made a joke about Smith's wife Jada and her shaved head.  He made a G.I. Jane  joke, which wasn't particularly good, it was made off the cuff, not in the rehearsed segment.  After slapping Rock, Will Smith yelled twice in a very full and articulate voice to, “Keep my wife's name out your fucking mouth”.  It was at that point that everyone went beyond shock and dismay that it might be a rehearsed stunt, because you shouldn't use the “F” word on live television… twice. So now we're all Monday Morning quarterbacking this whole thing.  Lucky for you I have all the answers because I am an omnipotent being who is all knowing.  My take on it is similar to the take Jimmy Kimmel had and the take is this: Chris Rock made the G.I. Jane joke about Jada Pinkett's shaved head.  The camera cuts to the two of them and Will Smith appears to be chuckling and rolling with it.  His wife, however, is not.  The camera cuts back to Chris Rock and we can only ASSume, and you know I love to assume, that Will looked over at his  wife and his chuckle quickly disappeared.  I'm willing to bet it was a look like, “If you don't' want to sleep on the couch for an indeterminate amount of time, you better do something.”  Or maybe he just saw that her feelings were hurt.  In any case, the rest is history and and it was ugly on so many levels. So, on a night that should have been a celebration of his great achievement in his industry, instead he's stuck in a very, very bad situation.   Chris Rock has made no statement but ticket sales to his standup performances have skyrocketed.  And there's one other person we have not heard from and that is the person who was on the butt end of the Chris Rock joke and that is Jada Pinkett Smith.  She has only posted a cryptic message on Instagram stating, “This is a season for healing and I'm here for it.” I'd like to say this is not a season for cryptic messages.  This is not a season to keep quiet, when you had some hand in this whole occurrence.  No, you're not responsible for your husband's foolish action, but you are responsible for your reaction.  While you didn't like the comment, who would, it was your look of disapproval or disgust at your husband… who you've been married to for 24 years in what you have indicated was an open marriage, had to know what you were communicating to your husband in that moment.  Or even put that aside, you still have an opportunity to alleviate some of the pressure on your husband by making a clear statement owning some of your reaction or… making a statement about your medical condition having alopecia and how many people have it.  But you have not.  I would suggest folks look to Kareem Abdul Jabar.  Why in the world would I bring up his name?  By the time you listen to this, his essay on this incident will have gone viral and in it he goes over the myriad of issues this incident, in those few seconds, has created.  The piece is titled, “Will Smith Did a Bad, Bad Thing: Slapping Chris Rock was also a blow to men, women, the entertainment industry, and the Black community.”  I'm not sure where you will end up reading it but it's source is a site called “Substack” which is similar to “Patreon”.   If you're like me you have no idea what either of those are.  They are both “platforms” meaning they are websites and mobile apps for people who what to make money from their blogs, podcasts, Tick-tock, Instagram, etc.  I digress… Kareem's subtitle says it all: Will Smith's act was a blow to men, women, the entertainment industry and the black community.  Kareem addresses each of those things and says that Jada Pinkett was and is completely capable of defending herself, especially against words, namely a joke that she didn't find funny.  On that note, I would like to read you a quote from a video on Jada Pinkett's Instagram account from 2021 showing herself with a shaved head, she said, "Now at this point, I can only laugh.”  So, besides being extremely ironic, it also shows how it's easy for anyone to say they have let go of something and realizing that “thing” they thought they let go of is still very raw.  Plus it's one thing to make jokes about yourself and another to have them made at your expense.  I would also include that, I don't know if she was ever a professional model specifically, but I think most folks would agree that Jada Pinkett is and has been very beautiful in terms of traditional beauty and features that are, on a broad scale, considered beautiful.   Jesus, do you see how friggin careful I'm being right now, not to overtly show how shallow and superficial I am?  Political correctness takes wayyyy to much time to make sure I haven't offended someone.  And I think taking too much time making sure you haven't offended anyone, you haven't impressed anyone either.  And by impressed I mean, have you provided value in terms of being either entertaining, educational or informative.  How's that for being a blowhard. Enough of that, and at the same time we can't get enough of that.  We love a train wreck don't we.  Especially when we'er not on either one of the trains. This is part two with my friend Larry Dorf, creator, writer and producer of the Netflix hit, “The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window”.  We spend the rest of our time talking about:  what the promotions process was like in terms of doing interviews before the show was released.  They actually had to be coached on how to handle certain questions like a politician.   What it was like shooting a production on location during the Covid Pandemic.  Once the cast was set, you couldn't just bring someone in on short notice because of the Covid protocols at the time.   We talk about one of the executive producers for the series which was Will Farrell and there's an interesting story there.  How to segue your business from hanging a shingle outside your door to actually having a company with a name and a logo.  How do you do that? There's a chat about Larry's parents, and this fits right into the Modern Moron listener sweetspot demographics, we talk about senior living facilities… I'm sorry… communities.  Communities.  I think the main difference is cocktail hour. All this and more on the Modern Moron and thank you for listening… CLOSE - Another element in “The Woman in The House Across The Street From The Girl In The Window” besides how tiring the Title gets after saying it a few times, is what I'm going to call an homage to, let's call it the Scorsese montage.  If you've seen “Goodfellas”, you know what I'm talking about.  Scorsese grabs a hip, rocking piece of music, adds the narrator with some clips of what transpires.  To me, the most famous is in Goodfellas when we see all the Gangsters get whacked to the fantastic guitar of Eric Clapton in “Layla” by Derek and the Dominoes, in fact it's in the second half of the song…. The Woman in the House, kills it - no pun intended- with their homage to that cinematic mechanism with the Rolling Stones “Can You Hear Me Knockin'”.  Why am I so excited about this?  Music is so, so powerful in evoking emotions and this song in particular has so many moments within it, so many builds and mood swings, from the iconic guitar intro with Mick Jagger in the background…To the chorus… To the incredible saxophone solo… to the cold ending.  Set to images, it's fantastic and yes I'm going on and on like a nerd about this but when you watch it you'll see and feel what I mean.  Great job by Rock, Paper, Scissors Productions. That's it for the Modern Moron for a while, unless you want to be on the show… I'm not going to babble about my opinions week after week just because I'm omnipotent.  If I find something interesting like the concept of Bitcoin mining, yes that's a thing, and how much electricity is required to power the thousands of computers that engage in Bitcoin mining, so much so that the town of Hardin, Montana that had a coal fired power plant that was going to be closed down was purchased just to run the Bitcoin mining computers.  An entire powerplant.   It was going to be closed, but now it's back to running around the clock burning coal.  To make money from Bitcoin.  The same thing is happening in New York near Ceneca Lake.  Reported 15,000 computers that could power something like 30,000 homes.  For bitcoin.   If I could get someone who claims to know about that, I would definitely talk to them.  So until next time, thank you for listening to The Modern Moron. Will Smith Did a Bad, Bad Thing - Kareem Abdul-Jabbar - Substack https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/2022/03/29/will-smith-richard-williams/ https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2022/03/28/will-smith-jada-pinkett-slap-fallout/

INTRO - Welcome to another episode of the Modern Moron.  I'm pretty excited about my guest for a number of reasons, number one being that I find Larry Dorf to be an extremely entertaining person that I've known more than 20 years.  Did you hear that Larry?  That's a long time.  He's a funny guy and I'm not completely sure that most of the time he's not really trying to be funny. A second reason, probably the main reason, is that Larry is one of the creators, writers and producers of the Netflix hit, “The Woman in The House Across The Street From The Girl In The Window”.  I feel pretty sure you've at least heard of it and I'm going to insist that you watch it.  It's a great title and a really, really bad hashtag. “The Woman in The House Across The Street From The Girl In The Window” is a parody… a satire of the suspense thriller novel genre like, “The Woman in The Window”, “The Woman in Cabin 10”, “The Other Woman” and on and on. We talk about the fine line of walking between making fun of the genre and dropping in jokes and still honor the genre of a suspense thriller.  For example, this series is not like the movie Airplane with gag after gag.  In an interesting way, a suspense thriller or even a horror movie is not unlike comedy.  You have to have a setup where you get the audience to think you're going in one direction and then the surprising reveal is the punchline of a joke or the scare of a thriller.  How do you honor both? I found it to be a very interesting conversation and I hope you do too.   Finally, Larry was on this podcast once before, our most listened to episode by the way… and I tell him this fact.  It was when he and his partners were writing and producing “Mike Tyson Mysteries” for Adult Swim's Cartoon Network.   On that episode Larry claimed to “break the news” that the show was not being picked up after it's 4th season.  We recorded that episode at the end of May, 2020 and that information came out in January, so this wasn't exactly a cutting edge news exclusive, at least we didn't think so.  However, apparently it had not been officially announced and somehow, there were a few nerdy news websites that actually sited this podcast, yes, THIS podcast to announce it's cancellation, thereby explaining the mystery of why that episode had more downloads than any of our other episodes. I don't believe him at first, so Larry proves this to me by sending me a link from his phone to a site called screenrant.com that sites The Modern Moron as it's news source.  How ridiculous is that?  This podcast is a news source? Please… I'm just a journalist trying to be true to my craft. But the reason I bring this up is because of how pee in my pants giddy I become over this when I actually read it in disbelief.  You can almost hear my ego expanding…  So, yes we were sited in the publication screenrant.com but it also appeared in The U.S. Sun. Their about page states: “The Sun.com is a US online edition of The Sun, Britain's largest newspaper.”  We also appeared in a website called comicbook.com  How about this…. A little publication called “NEWSWEEK”!!! EVER HEARD OF IT?  It has the same quote from larry and sites “The Modern Moron Podcast”  however Newsweek did not create a hyperlink where the name is, so hey, Newsweek?  Lawsuit is forthcoming.  You're gonna want to put your best people on this case. By the way, Mike Tyson Mysteries, which you can still catch streaming on Hulu, has a 97% positigve fan rating on rottentomatoes.com.   Can we please not gloss over that?  That is a huge rating, from fans. Also, One of the voices of Mike Tyson Mysteries, was that of comedian Norm MacDonald who passed away in September of last year.  I ask Larry about working with Norm and he talks about how the producers of that show valued Norm's opinion on what was funny and how much they wanted Norm to have been able to see their Netflix hit.  From all the appearances and interviews of Norm after he passed, it seemed like across the board, not only did people love him for how genuine he was but how they valued his unique perspective on comedy and how hearing his laugh was the best compliment of all.  So, please enjoy this part 1 episode where I get a little too excited about being mentioned in a website.  It's THE Larry Dorf from the Netflix hit, and terrible hashtag, “The Woman in The House Across The Street From The Girl In The Window” and thank you for listening. Close - You know how movies many times have product placement in them and the production company can make a little money?  Well, this production had to have Corning Ware as a major donor because there was shitload of casserole dishes in this production.   Also, you're the first to hear the bombshell that  “The Woman in The House Across The Street From The Girl In The Window” is done.  It was a limited series with no season two.  I wonder if part of the allure they were going for included calling it season ONE?  Hmmm mysterious. How cool was the Amy Schumer story?  I wonder if she would do this podcast just to talk about Larry's show?  I mean this podcast is a news source now so she bound to listen to it. In part 2 we talk about what the promotions process was like in terms of doing interviews before the show was released.  They actually had to be coached on how to handle certain questions like a politician.  What it was like shooting a production on location during the Covid Pandemic. We talk about one of the executive producers for the series which was Will Farrell and there's an interesting story there.  So many reasons to tune in to part 2 with Larry Dorf and  “The Woman in The House Across The Street From The Girl In The Window” and thank you for listening.   The Woman in The House Across The Street From The Girl In The Window - Netflix  Mike Tyson Mysteries Cancelled After Four Seasons | Screen Rant - The Modern Moron sited as an actual news source!!!  From 'Venture Bros' to 'Metalocalypse'—The Most Controversial Adult Swim Cancellations - Newsweek

Oh my god, I have so many elderly meandering things to ask you and tell you… so many things I don't understand. A couple of items I found interesting in the past couple of weeks regarding some minor events we've experienced, mainly what I'm hearing is the first war in Europe since WWII.  A couple of things: On the day Russia invaded Ukraine I heard a story on NPR, one of my main news sources along with the Associated Press, Reuters and The Wall Street Journal.  In this NPR story, which I could not find later, the reporter in Ukraine was asked how citizens were handling it on the first day.  She said “humor”.  She said the usual tensions of day to day life seemed to dissipated and that there were more Ukranians helping each other.  Particularly helping the elderly with their supplies… helping them carry groceries and assisting with finding bomb shelters and that there was a sense of quiet unity.  I found that sort of hopeful and very cool. Another NPR story which I did find the link to and so will you at the bottom of this description, is regarding US Military intelligence for Ukraine that was being delayed and therefore was not nearly as valuable, because of attorneys.  The interview is with  Republican Nebraska Senator Ben Sasse who is on the Senate Intelligence Committee.  Yes, it sounds like an oxymoron, but let's leave that alone for now.   Also, while we're on Ukraine can we talk about how to pronounce it's capital, Kiev. I always thought it was Kiyev.  In fact I thought it was a different city, but then I found out it wasn't so I thought it was like Niche.  Remember when the word niche was pronounced niTCH? But then I wasn't fancy enough to have a nitch and I had to have a niche.  So I left my niTCH in Key-yev.  Actually there's more to it.  Key-yev   But this episode is about my guest… my college senior and the value of learning to write, to convey a thought and support an argument or position.  Isn't there a thing called a position paper?   My senior mentions writing in MLA.. MLA style refers the style recommended by the Modern Language Association (MLA) for preparing scholarly manuscripts and student research papers. It concerns itself with the mechanics of writing, such as punctuation, quotation, and, especially, documentation of sources.  The “Modern” Language Association was Founded in 1883.   How that makes it modern? I have no idea.  Maybe the same thing that makes this moron modern. Do you remember doing research papers and having to have a bibliography… and citing sources?  Remember ibid?  I remember using that a lot so I had to re-look it up and ibid is when you're using the same source but a different section, so you just put ibid… I-B-I-D which is latin for in the same place —used to indicate that a reference is from the same source as a previous reference.  Which you probably already knew… and proceeded to forget, like me. We talk about studying art and applying techniques vs. studying art history and studying techniques.  Also how most artists that create art piece together their career and their income.  Most artists at one time or another teach art.  I've heard the expression, “those that can't do, teach”, which is utter horse manure.  Most artists, in addition to creating art, teach or find commercial applications for their art.  You've heard of actors who do one film “for the studios” and for the money, so they can take smaller roles or roles in smaller independent films for art's sake.  In the art  world not everyone can become a Takashi Murakami, Jenny Saville, David Hockney or Yayoi Kusama.  And to those iconic names you're probably saying, who said what now? No, I've never heard of any of those artists either but apparently they are among 10 artists you should know about.  There is a link to the article at the bottom of the description. We get back to our discussion about mental health and the growth that occurs between freshman and senior year of both high school and college.  More wisdom from youth and my college senior on the Modern Moron… thanks for listening.   CLOSE - What better way to conclude an episode about art than to talk about the Simpsons and Bob's Burgers.  Like most shows I was way late to the party when it comes to Bob's Burgers.  My daughter and I watch it and it does crack me up.  And if you appreciate the aesthetics of different animation styles you really should watch episode 1 of the 8th season of Bob's Burgers.  Some refer to it as a “fan-imation” episode where non professional animators were allowed to animate a scene of the show.  I really enjoyed it and again it is the first episode of season 8 called “Brunchsquatch”. Thank you to my guest and an early congratulations on her graduation in just a couple months!  Now… it is a rare occasion where I actually know who my next guest is and can promote it and I have a pretty great guest coming up next time. Are  you familiar with the Netflix show “The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window”?  It was on Netflix's top 10 when it first came out, and has received some great reviews.  It is a satire of the psychological thriller, keep that in mind when you watch.  My GUEST is one of the creators of the show along with being one of the writers and producers.  He has been on the show before when he was writing for the animated show Mike Tyson's Mysteries, an episode that included an interesting story about Mike Tyson and it's our most downloaded episode!  Of course I'm talking about Larry Dorf.  He's my guest next time, I'm very excited, so stay tuned… to the Modern Moron. Kyiv or Kiev? Why people disagree about how to pronounce the Ukrainian capital's name - NPR Why Is Ukraine's Capital Pronounced 'Kyiv' and Not 'Kiev'? | HowStuffWorks    10 Contemporary Artists you should know - Artsper Magazine  The Bob's Burgers Cast Improvises a Mini-Episode About the Birds and the Bees - YouTube | Vulture Magazine 

Welcome to an… episode of the Modern Moron.  Wow.  Long, long time since we've done an episode.  A lot of water under the bridge, a lot of swabs up noses, needles in arms and a lot of masks being worn and NOT being worn.  So… why?  Why do an episode and why did we quit? Why I quit… seemed like it was getting stale, I was told it was getting stale, listening to the Senator and me bickering over the same old political issues and politicians mainly.  It seemed like I became more interested in my opinions than my curiosity.  And this podcast.  Podcast?  It's more like a one way conference call, but with over 1 million podcasts, think about that… 1 million podcasts, I'm sitting down behind a microphone with my big fat ego and all of it's opinions… and I don't want that.  I don't want to have opinions.  If anything I'd like to lose opinions.  My opinions are like the crap you stick in your garage or a storage unit.  It's a bunch of worthless crap.  If it had any value, it wouldn't be in a storage unit or collect dust in your garage.  That is what I think of my opinions and my ego keeps trying to sell me these worthless opinions as if they have value.  They don't.  My goal is to evaporate my ego and lose all of my opinions.  This podcast doesn't really do that.  So why this episode? I have a bit of a problem.  Not a huge problem but it's something that is on my mind daily and it's something I worry about as I'm sure you worry as well.  It's our children.  I have a soon to be teenaged daughter that is soon to be going into high school.  She's got some issues as all kids do and her grades are not currently “the best” and she doesn't particularly like school.  Some kids like school and some don't, mine doesn't, at least not right now.  And like many kids this age, not all, mine doesn't look to me as a source of wisdom.  In fact, based on the tone of her responses and the receptiveness to my advice, she thinks I'm an idiot, or rather a moron.  I have to bear some of the responsibility for that.  First off I put the word Moron in the name of this podcast and I am also known to use self deprecating humor from time to time so I have not done a lot to garner a ton of respect by my own hand.  Still, there are many parents who find themselves in the same boat. So, grades are not the best right now and her small group of friends seem to be getting better grades and after next year will be heading to the local private Catholic high school to which she now wants to attend.  However A) she may not have the grades to get into that school and B) the private catholic high school she wants to go to is even more expensive than the private shool we're sending her to now and I'm not sure I want to pay that kind of money for a kid who doesn't like school.  Again, I'm sure I'm not alone in this situation but I have chosen to talk to a sort-of expert.  An expert in high school and college preparatory school because she recently went to one, in fact the same high school as my daughter has her eye on.  She is now a senior at a liberal arts university in New York.  We've talked to her before, she's the Senator's daughter and we talk about post pandemic academic life and how that was just as hard to get used to as it was to go into quarantine.  We talk about post graduate work and the perspective on high school advice from a college senior.  Maybe you will find some similarities in the changes to your routines as well. We start our conversation by talking about what it was like to come back to college.  I thought she was going to say rainbows and unicorns but it wasn't.  It was hard and like most change it took some adjusting. It's a Re-egowakening with a college senior and a Moron minor on the Modern Moron… CLOSE - What she said at the beginning of the episode, “the weird thing about time is when you're in it, it feels like forever but once you're out of it, it doesn't feel long at all.”  The wisdom of perspective.  And I love the ease with which she was able to discuss her mental health going through high school and in college.  I don't know how another college kid would ever end up listening to this episode but wouldn't it be great if one found it that needed to hear that message of not being alone in feeling alone, or feeling anxious or nervous.  You never know. Next episode, whenever that is that I just show up in your headphones, we'll continue our discussion about writing papers for college, breakups and therapists and good luck finding a therapist since the pandemic, because they ARE ALL BOOKED.  Seriously, if you feel you need some therapy right now, and who doesn't, it just isn't available at least in the health care systems I'm familiar with.  We also spend some time talking about what it's like to study art and art history vs. creating art in college.  I hope you'll check it out, thanks for listening to the Modern Moron.

Ep. 103 Ted Lasso the Christmas Episode, Old Men Fawning Over Younger Women is So Gross and The Fear of Getting Old Welcome to the Modern Moron where we take a brief break from the shitstorm that is our civilization and spend some time taling about the hugely popular Ted Lasso, some of the characters and it's co-creator Jason Sudeikis.  Part of the show's attraction is that despite the aforementioned shitstorm this planet seems to be currently embroiled in, Sudeikis and Ted Lasso seem bound and determined to find a bright spot, grab ahold of it and refuses to let go.  All in the midst of their endearing character's challenges and flaws.   The show is so determined to give us the warm and fuzzies that they even released a Christmas special in August that had all the trimmings of the romantic comedy or rom-com … Love Actually. For the most part, I didn't care for the Christmas episode.  I didn't really care for Love Actually either for the same reason.  Too sugar coated for me.  I seem to remember being nauseated by Keira Knightley in particular.   However I may need to revisit the film, if for no other reason than for Bill Nighey's washed up old rocker trying to make a comeback selling one of his revamped hits as a Christmas song.  THAT is my  kind of Christmas character.  I also love, love Alan Rickman who is in that film as well with Emma Thompson who is also fantastic.  Hmmm, I am talking about a film I don't like, right?  Where were we? Ted Lasso!  The Christmas episode.  A number of homages to Love Actually in the episode and that's why I didn't like it.  Okay moving on… we then begin to talk about our favorite characters in the show.  First off, we can't remember the name of Roy Kent, who is played by Brett Goldstein.  He's probably my favorite character because, well he's old - at least by professional soccer standards - and he's angry.  What more could I ask for?  He also has a podcast, yuk, and I hear it's very good.  It's called “Films To Be Buried With With Brett Goldstein”.  He has a guest every episode and finds out about films that stand out at different points in their lives.  Hmm?  A focused podcast with a point.  What a concept.   Regarding Brett Goldstein, there are two articles in the bottom of the description from Vulture, which is sort of a website covering entertainment and is an off-shoot of New York Magazine.   Here is an excerpt from one of the articles where Brett talks about how he got the role of Roy Kent.  I REALLY want to try to read this as Roy Kent but my daughter thinks I do embarrassingly lousy impressions, which means I might do it anyway… Brett says: “So what happened was — and I still can't believe it worked out, and I also can't believe that I did it — basically, as we were writing it, I just started to think I could play Roy; I really get it. I really get this part. But I also knew it was not the sort of part I would usually play. I usually play a softer character. It's probably my typecast up to that point. So I didn't want to say anything because I thought, No one's thinking of me for this role. And I didn't want to embarrass anyone and make it awkward. So on my last day in the writers' room, the night before, I [recorded a tape], five scenes as Roy, without telling anyone, and then I sent an email to Bill [Lawrence] and said, ‘I've been thinking I could play Roy … but if this is embarrassing, you can pretend you never got this email, and I will never ask you about it.' Then I got a message from him at like three in the morning, going, ‘Oh! This is good. Let's see.' And then very luckily it all went ahead.” Regarding Hannah Waddingham who plays the owner of the futbol club, I'm embarrassed to say I get a little too exuberant in describing her statuesqueness.  And having to stomach listening to myself is making me more aware that nobody wants to hear an old man talk about the opposite sex in any sort of desirous way except maybe… MAYBE other old men.  It's gross.  That time has passed, show some class and keep that shit to yourself.  It's where the term dirty old man comes from.  I wanted to leave it out, but then I thought… fuck it.  Just expose the disgustingness of it, but try to learn from it and keep your mouth shut next time.   We also get all tied up looking for a photo of Ms. Waddingham and I try to send the Senator to imdb.com which stands for  Internet Movie Database and it's great for looking up that guy who was on that show, you know, I can't think of her name but she did a movie with Tom Cruise.  So you look up Tom Cruise and then you see all of his movies and then you recognize the one you saw “that person” and you click on it and find the actor.  That goes for writers, directors and producers as well.    Okay, Ms. Waddinghams incredible voice… she has performed for many years in London's West End which is our version of Broadway.  In fact, she's performed on our version of Broadway as well where she played The Lady of the Lake in Spamalot. Finally, the co-creator of Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis.  There is a GREAT, thoughtful interview with him, link at the bottom, from Indiewire.com, which is a film industry and review website that focuses on independent film.  It's about a 20 minute interview and I'm going to play a clip from it that focuses on the one time where Coach Lasso calls out Jamie Tart in front of the entire team.  He tries to do it once before when they were alone, but if you remember, Lasso's son comes running in which interrupts what he was about to say to Tart.  Tart ends up signing his son's jersey for him and the moment is gone. But when Lasso does call out Tart in front of his teammates in the locker room, he keeps repeating the word “practice”.  Jamie Tart skipped practice because he said he had an injury which he clearly didn't and was passive aggressively acting out in protest.  But Sudeikis using the word “practice” over and over again is an homage to former NBA star Alan Iverson.  Fortunately, you didn't need to know that to see the message that was being delivered in the scene.  But if you did catch that connection, there's a lot more going on.   Alan Iverson was a firebrand of a basketball player.  He was only 6 feet tall, which really isn't that tall for a player who dominated the way he did.  He did an infamous press conference where he was asked about missing practice.  He uttered the word practice 26 times… Almost word for word right?... Even though most people have only heard that part of the press conference, it was at least a half hour long and I listened to all of it so I could find more context.  The context that Jason Sudeikis provides… So here we have the same message about practice, but it's not coming from a cocky soccer player or an young League MVP… now, that same message is coming from a coach.  Sudeikis turned it on its head… and it was also the first time we see Ted get fired up in a tough love, stick versus the carrot type of coaching.  But it was what Jamie Tart needed.  By the way when I mention the character Jamie Tart the Senator says he thinks she's a cutie… I think he was thinking of the character Keeley Jones played by Juno Temple. So, we have a nice light and breezy episode talking about Ted Lasso… until… I bring up the topic of getting old.  Like moving to a senior living facility old.  “Senior Living Facility” that is definitely not what they call it.  I think it's Senior Living Community.  I took a tour of a facility a couple of weeks ago as my 80 year old sister is ready… yes, ready on her own… to move into such a community.  It's really nice, but it's also really scary.  Actually, I think I'm the one that's scared because I know that's going to be me soon.  Sooner than I think or realize… So I make sure and squelch out the good Lasso vibes by brining that up.  You're welcome. CLOSE - I guarantee you this topic will be discussed many more times on this program because it's hugely popular with adults 25 to 49 and males 18 to 34.  Wait, that's not our demographic.  You know who you are. There is so much more trivia I could unload on you regarding Ted Lasso but there's not enough time.  Isn't there?  There's no time limit… it's just the two or three of us.  For example, you may already know that Hannah Waddingham played the character Septa Unella on Game of Thrones, which I have never seen, and in one episode she underwent about 10 hours of water torture on set to get approximately 90 seconds of usable takes.  True story.  I read it on the internet so it has to be true. A quick COVID note about our friends in this country who are not getting vaccinated.  Apparently the states where the COVID variant is spiking happen to be red states, which are also states where vaccinations are severely lagging, can you imagine?  Well, here is the Governor of West Virginia, Jim Justice… great name, telling his citizens to put down their conspiracy theories and get vaccinated… Red state, Republican Governor.  God sakes a livin', that's a good ol' boy right there. Also, as of this recording, The San Francisco Giants are the first team in baseball to clinch a playoff berth!   Okay, that's it for realsies… thank you for listening, please forward this to a few people you think might enjoy it or as a practical joke to some people you think will hate it.  Just forward it and we'll see you next time. Ted Lasso - Apple TV   Ted Lasso's Christmas Episode Made Everyone Lose Their Mind - Vulture | New York Magazine Ted Lasso's Brett Goldstein on Finding Roy Kent's Soft Side - Vulture | New York Magazine   Ted Lasso Theme - YouTube  Jason Sudeikis on the Hidden Truths Behind Ted Lasso's Allen Iverson Tribute - IndieWire.com  Analysis: This Republican governor NAILS it on anti-vaxxers - CNN Love Actually, Bill Nighy, Festering Turd of a Record   Jason Sudeikis And Brendan Hunt Talk 'Ted Lasso' Season 2 - NBC Today Show | YouTube Music:  Deliberate Thought by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/?keywords=deliberate+thought  Artist: http://incompetech.com/

Welcome to a very full episode of the modern moron, a bit longer than usual.  We cover a lot of ground so I'm mostly going to just give you some bullet points… mostly, so you can either be prepared, be in on the joke, or decide to skip this episode entirely.  Sort of a spoiler alert without too much spoilage. Item #1 - The Senator peed his pants… again.  If you're a guy and you're listening, you're probably right in this demographic, you've done it too and it's just a sign to us all to stop wearing khakis. But this very quickly  segues in into... Item #2 - A sincere apology… from the senator.  Hmm, how do I set this up.  We were both in a high school alumni golf tournament a few weeks ago.  He and his high school buddies were in the foursome behind my foursome.  Through most of the round, say about ¾, the Senator was telling another guy in his foursome to yell certain things during my backswing.  Things that might “get to me” and you all know what a delicate flower I am.  Well, It's one thing to do that from 2 or 3 hundred yards away, and another to do it from the same tee which is what he did himself toward the end.  He yelled from 15 yards away the name of a girl I was in love with in high school that ended in a very gasoline soaked fiery crash.  Should I have gotten over that by now?  Yes.  Is it still a complete dick move by the Senator?  Yes to that as well.  He came sauntering over right after saying it, and after I shanked the drive, as if I would have no problem with him yelling at me during my backswing, and I tee'd off on him, pun intended.  He had been trying to buzz kill my round of golf so I buzz killed everyone's round by yelling an f-bomb ladended tirade in front of eight people and ruined their round, at least for that moment.  A couple of complete morons.  So that is what he apologizes for.  It was sincere and very out of character for the Senator.  Good for you Senator. Item #3 - Afghanistan.  We hit this topic a couple fo times actually and this section is about the refugees - Afghanistan or Mexico or Central America, what's the difference?  Why do Afghani's get sympathy, deservedly so, but our closer neighbors to the south get no love?  Or are they just the flavor of the week and it's in vogue to give them refuge.  And how are we going to be viewing them in 5 or 10 years when they are still learning finding their place in our society? Item #4 - We are reminded that now California Senator Alex Padilla owes over $35M to California Tax payers from money he funneled to a firm that happened to be advising then presidential candidate Joe Biden.  We originally discussed this in February of this year on Episode 89. Item #5 - The Senator refers to a certain Vice President as ‘The hooker from San Francisco'? Item #6 - Afghanistan again… This time it's US Marine Corps Lt. Col. Stuart Scheller who was relieved of duty on August 27th.  This happened after posting a video the same day the 13 soldiers were killed at the Airport in Kabul.  In the video he calls out the senior leadership for their lack of accountability in botching the withdrawal from Afghanistan.  I don't need to tell you that as a soldier, you do not post videos proclaiming any political criticism.  Period.  You're a soldier and you take orders.  But Lt. Scheller did and he was relieved of duty.  Most of the coverage of this was from the right because it shines a light on the mismanagement of Biden's Whitehouse and because of that, I went looking for more left leaning publications which to no surprise were not as easy to find.   CNN had a a short article in which:Marine Corps spokesperson Maj. Jim Stenger said in a statement that Scheller had been relieved of command: "due to a loss of trust and confidence in his ability to command.  This is obviously an emotional time for a lot of Marines, and we encourage anyone struggling right now to seek counseling or talk to a fellow Marine. There is a forum in which Marine leaders can address their disagreements with the chain of command, but it's not social media," Scheller wrote in a Facebook post Friday after being relieved that "my chain of command is doing exactly what I would do... if I were in their shoes." "I will not be making any statements other than what's on my social platforms until I exit the Marine Corps. America has many issues... but it's my home," he wrote. The other coverage I have is a Time magazine op-ed from a military veteran who writes: Scheller held battalion command. The Marine Corps is very selective about which officers it grooms to become battalion commanders; the fact that Scheller held that job means he was—before this past week—well-regarded, a Marine with a future in the Corps. Furthermore, Scheller is seventeen years into a twenty-year career. At twenty years, he would have been eligible for retirement at half his base pay with other benefits, like healthcare for life. It took him exactly four minutes and forty-five seconds to throw that all away.  Why did he do this? Until the past two weeks, Afghanistan was not a place, or an issue, most American cared about. In 2018, 42 percent of the country couldn't even say whether or not we were still at war there. Over the past two decades, the war in Afghanistan has been waged by an all-volunteer military and funded through deficit spending. Unlike other wars, there has been no draft and no war tax. It's often been said that while America's military has spent the past twenty years at war, America itself has been at the mall. This has led to a massive civilian-military divide. This botched withdrawal, in which many active duty as well as retired members of our military are receiving hundreds of phone calls and texts daily from their Afghan allies and their families who are now left to fend for themselves against the Taliban, has only deepened this sense of alienation among many who've served. One only need to look back through history—from Caesar's Rome to Napoleon's France—to see clearly that when a republic couples a large standing military with dysfunctional domestic politics, democracy doesn't last long. I hope you will check out the links at the bottom of this description, you can also find them at themodernmoron.com under episode 101(?)  Moving right along... Item #7 - Louis Farrakan's bow tie - What can I say?  The Senator sent me a link to a speech he gave recently that is NOT at the bottom of this episode.  You're gonna have to find that yourself or ask the Senator.   Item #8 - Then we start talking about the recall of California Governor, Gavin Newsome.  We begin talking about the what if's of this total waste of tax payer dollars when I stop… and listen and I hear this… (sfx).  I let it go the first time, but when I hear it again I'm pretty sure it's the Senator clipping his fingernails during our conversation.  I don't know which is worse: hearing him clip his nails as opposed to being engaged in the conversation or the level of disgust I find at him doing it.  This show is basically a phone call, but it really bothers me, to no one's surprise, when I hear it. Which he then tells us he had a masseuse come out to his house to give his family massages.  Do you do this?  Should I be making a budgetary adjustment to allow for a monthly massage?  That is so not on my radar of things to work into the budget.  Maybe it should be.  Maybe I wouldn't be such a dick if I got a massage once a month.  I think I'd need more than one a month. So, yeah, that's a lot even for a couple of Morons.  Thank you for listening... CLOSE - Did we just sound like a conservative talk show here?  Or is it just because we have a democrat in the whitehouse screwing things up instead of a republican in there screwing it all up?   Regarding The Senator seeing Farrakhan  on Phil Donahue 20 years ago.  Phil Donahue did his milestone talk show from 1970 to 1996… I didn't think he did it that long.   Regarding Lt. Col. Stuart Scheller, I don't think we've heard the last from him.  He wrote on September 2nd: “Going forward, I must remain committed to forcing accountability across our senior leaders.  I do not trust that reviews done by panels at the political/military level will bring the change we seek.  And I do not trust that it will change unless a strong enough force is applied to the system.  Major changes are needed.  The system needs to be broken and rebuilt.  We need fresh blood and perspective across the entire system. (he goes on) It's time for a new generation to assume American power.  We are ready, and we reject the current system.   This entire experience has illustrated to me just how hungry Americans are for honesty, accountability, and reform across the government.  This was expressed to me from ALL political parties.  We the people want change.  We the people WILL take it.  We the people are ALL Americans. Follow me, and we will bring the whole fucking system down… in a constitutional manner with one loud voice.” As a person who loves to curse and does so way too much, that f-bomb at the end did not help his message.  And the, “we the people WILL take it.” comment feels a little insurrectionist to this moron.  He could be running for political office in the future and I'll be curious to see which party he affiliates himself with. That's it for this moron, next episode will not be so heavy I promise you, in fact I think we're going to talk a little Ted Lasso… thank you for listening, forward this to someone who you think might like it and we'll see you next time...   Lt. Col. Stuart Scheller Speaks To the American Leadership.… - YouTube ( Channel: The Thinking Conservative) US Marine officer relieved of command after criticizing military leaders about Afghanistan withdrawal - CNN The Botched Afghanistan Withdrawal Exposes a Dangerous Fault Line in Our Democracy - Time  - BY ELLIOT ACKERMAN - Ackerman is the author of the novel “Red Dress in Black and White” and the memoir Places and Names: On War, Revolution, and Returning, as well as three other novels. He served five tours of duty in Iraq and Afghanistan, received the Silver Star, the Bronze Star for Valor, and the Purple Heart.

Welcome to episode 100 of the Modern Moron!  We do have a special guest for this landmark episode depending on how you define the word special.  Our guest is special to me as I've known this guy as my bff since junior year in high school.  We were both undersized, red-headed umm what?  Misfits?   Class clowns?  Maybe.  Outcasts?  No, he certainly wasn't an outcast.  In fact he was smart enough to surround himself with two of the biggest guys in our class.  Neither of us were academics but he always had an angle and the angle was usually directed toward financial gain.  My dad loved that about him and when he would come over he would tell my dad that he was the son he never had.  My dad thought that was hilarious.   I even had the honor of being best man at his wedding. My guest, is referred to in this episode as Templeton, he gets that name from E.B. White's classic “Charlotte's Webb's” Templeton the rat.  Not because he likes to eat but because Templeton was always looking for that same angle of opportunity… He is also good friends with the Senator.  Both of them have something in common as it pertains to the title of this episode and the 6th track of the Beatles Sgt. Pepper Album She's Leaving Home.  Both  of them are taking their daughters away to college… one for the first time ever and the other for their Senior year, but it's after spending 14 to 17 months at home through the pandemic.  Not easy for either of them, but I think in particular for our friend Templeton.  You see Templeton is not a particularly emotional or animated person, doesn't like to talk about feelings or emotions, you know, a typical male.  But he is very close to his daughter.  I don't know all of the things they do or have in common but they do share a love of baseball.  They go to ball games together, they talk baseball.  She roots for the San Francisco Giants and he roots for the Oakland A's, but it's a real bonding thing and I know this is really hard for him as well as it is for the Senator taking his daughter to the East Coast for her Senior hear of College. My guest also has a love of practical jokes, which I do not share.  I hate practical jokes, but in this case we pull a very short joke on the senator at the beginning of this episode and here is the setup:  I use a service called Zencastr to record this podcast.  Part of the process is that each participant has to sign in and everyone's name is on the computer screen.  I had Templeton sign in with a phony name like “Audio Compression Engineer” or something like that, so if he saw it he wouldn't know who it was.  As it turned out he didn't look at the screen anyway, but Templeton decided to play with the Senator's head and chimed in as if he was Engineering our recording session as a third party.  Also, it didn't hurt that the Senator had already had his nightly cocktail. Toward the end of the episode we talk about hiking as our guest had just returned from a trip to Yosemite to go on a couple hikes with his son.  Naturally the Senator loves to talk about his hiking accomplishments, namely the Tahoe Rim Trail.  But our guest confuses this and says The Senator hiked Pacific Rim Trail in three days.  The Pacific Rim as opposed to the Tahoe Rim, Consists of all the continents and countries that surround the Pacific Ocean.. I mean from Australia to the tip of South America and all points in between including: South Korea, Japan, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, the Philippines, China and Russia, Canada, the United States plus all of Central America and Colombia, Ecuador, Peru and Chile.  Meaning, the Pacific Rim is a little bigger than the Tahoe Rim, so enjoy that moment. A couple of  tough Dad's get sentimental about their daughter's going from cradle to college on this 100th episode of the Modern Moron.  Thanks for listening... CLOSE - See?  We knew what that he meant to say the Pacific Trail but said the Pacific Rim because he was watching a war movie about Korea and General Douglas McArthur which led him to think of the Pacific Rim Theater of operations… wasn't that obvious to you?  What's wrong with you people? As you can tell, both the Senator and Templeton have a tendency to… confuse sayings and mispronounce a phrase or two from time to time.  And they both like to rely on the adage of, “you knew what I meant,” to which I usually call bullshit.  But I sure enjoy it and I hope you did too. I have a feeling we'll get Templeton back on this program to hopefully mix his metaphors, cause' that is a lot of fun.  Thank you for listening, please forward this episode to someone you think might like it, hug your daughter if you've got one and we'll see you next time on The Modern Moron. 

Welcome to episode 99 of the Modern Moron.  In this episode we welcome back the Senator not that he was gone that long.  I mostly berate and harass him which is no surprise, but I really do give him a hard time, downright mean.  All because he has trouble pronouncing certain words, in this case the city of Corinth.  There is so much moronoscity happening on so many levels in this episode. First of all we both refer to Corinth as an island.  It is not.  It's actually an isthmus, which I would absolutely love to hear the senator take a shot at that word.  An isthmus is a narrow strip of land connecting two larger masses of land. Second of all the Senator thinks it's pronounced Cor-Nith.  That's right Cor-Nith.  Normally that might not be such a big deal but when you are as steeped in the Catholic faith as he is, you hear the word Corinthians quite often.  St. Paul was pen pals with someone there and his letters were apparently so important that they put them in a book… it's called the Bible.  So you hear it there in addition to hearing it numerous times throughout the 70's from Ricardo Montalbon when referring to their high quality leather. Wait a minute where did that guy come from?  So, the Senator, without pause, calls this Greek isthmus Cor-Nith.  Why did it come up?  Because the senator wanted to impress someone, a priest no less, by telling him he had visited that island in his world travels.  Now, if you're going to talk about, or in this case boast, about your world travels or that you're a world traveler, wouldn't you think part of that worldliness would include pronouncing the places you travel to correctly?  And to refer to them by their correct geographic term?  Not if your ego is as big as the Senator's. Then he tries the argument that, “you knew what I was talking about” as if him botching the English language is mostly about my responsibility to decipher what comes out of his mouth and not his responsibility to articulate a clear thought.  You know, like your mother used to tell you to “use your words.”  Like a big boy! The reason this all came up is because the two of us had just come from a funeral.  A buddy of ours from high schools mother passed away.  And if you're listening to this it's because you're in our demographic and our demographic is starting to attend more and more funerals, preferably not as the guest of honor.  However, we're at that stage and we're going to talk more and more about death and dying as we all approach that bucket for one final kick. Which makes me think of the expression, “there are no atheists in foxholes.”  And as we get older, or certainly as I get older, I'm thinking about or trying to connect with… what?  God?  Jesus, Muhammed, Ginesh… The Buddha?  Mortality will tend to make most of us do that.  As usual, I don't really have a point, but I thought I would take all the humorous momentum of Cor-Nith and flush it down the toilet.   We begin our conversation with the Senator asking me for permission to do something, which I find to be completely out of character for the Senator, and it has to do with a wild boar's head… yes, the kind you hunt.   Also, halfway through his story he spills his cocktail and really loses it.  I find it entertaining but he is really pissed off about spilling his martini.  And then… a few seconds later you can hear him spill it again!  So much wonderful moronic entertainment awaiting you.  That you would never get, by the way, with some celebrity infested podcast or with some brainiacs on some topic from NPR.  This is true entertainment from the heartland.    We also talk about Apple's possible move to monitor and scan the contents of all iphones and the right to privacy.  So our Moronoscity and thank you for listening…  CLOSE - So there you have it, privacy on a leash courtesy of Apple.  You know our conversation went on and on covering a number of additional topics that I may or may not get to because our next episode will be our 100th and I'm not quite sure what or who will be on that show.  I wonder how long it will take to even get to it?  Should we try for a celebrity?  Maybe a celebrity only to this close knit group of listeners?  And by close knit, I mean all four of us?  The suspense is palpable isn't it?  Hope you have yourself a great day, evening or week, don't forget to forward this episode to someone who might like it, we'll see you next time and thank you for listening...

Welcome to another episode of the MM…Wow… long time no pod.  I have not posted an episode in over a month.  I hit a wall or definitely I had issues with an episode and I went into hibernation.  Or I got chicken to publish it so I moved on.  Maybe I'll get back to it, maybe  not.  But for this episode...Going to do something a little different and that is...we're going to try a guest who actually has some credentials.  He is a journalist, a publicist and a published author and yes, you're still listening to the Modern Moron.  As a journalist he wrote for the St. Petersburg times, now known as the Tampa Bay Times, the second largest newspaper as well as a staff writer for the Washington Post.  He has also been the press secretary for one of California's Lieutenant Governors.  My name is not Charlie Rose and this is not The Charlie Rose Show.  If I were, I would probably be making inappropriate sexual advances to this music…  Now we know why he chose that theme song.  But I digress… my guest has integrity even if I do not and we talk a little about working at California's state capital and politicians in general.  You're going to be surprised to find that most politicians have issues with their ego's… remind you of anyone? This session was recorded in early July.  And he brings up the fact that the corona virus is starting to spread in areas of the country with low vaccination rates and we've seen how that played out.  It is also way before the second mask mandate put in effect by the Governor on July 26th. He (our guest) talks a bit about his travels in Germany just after the fall of the Berlin Wall and what his overall impression was of that time during his freelance correspondence work and for the book he would later write.   Also, at one point I try to recall a saying which is, “there's no such thing as bad publicity” however I completely botch it and make it difficult for either of us to remember.  So, I'm basically letting you know in advance that I already know I'm a moron… see how woke I am? We're jamming with a journalist on this episode of the Modern Moron and thank you for listening. CLOSE - Wowwww… what do you think of that!?!  Ending on a hard line position like that?  Is this what's going to propel the Modern Moron Podcast into the upper echelons of double digit listeners?  Was that powerful enough for you?  Do you really agree with that and say hell yeah, get vax'd or move to the back.  That's catchy right? Or do you strongly oppose that view like this gentleman being interviewed on the streets of Alabama...  Okay, thank you that was great.   Our guest mentioned a book title about the closing of the American mind.  The full title of the book is called “The Closing of the American Mind: How Higher Education Has Failed Democracy and Impoverished the Souls of Today's Students”... sounds relevant doesn't' it?  It was written in 1987!  Okay, that's it for now, … please forward it to someone you think might find it interesting or if you just want to annoy someone, forward it to them and tell them they get mentioned by name in the middle of the episode.  We would greatly appreciate it.  Thank you for listening to the Modern Moron.

Welcome to another episode of the Modern Moron and in this episode we turn the way back machine on to go all the way back to college.  Specifically… actually it's not specific at all, as my guest is my old college roommate. We reminisce about being college freshman away from home, the freedom we had and how much we would cut up and laugh like a couple of 12 years old's having a sleepover… no offense to 12 year old's.  We talk about how I used to criticize his hygiene habits and behaviors and how much time he spent in front of the mirror.  He used to sway back and forth in font of the mirror while brushing his teeth or primping in general.  Why do I bring this up?  Because he says that his son does the same thing!  In passing he mentions that he also has a condition called Achondroplasia which affects growth of the limbs, spinal column and skull.  This condition is more commonly known as dwarfism and in most cases requires multiple very invasive surgeries to cope with this condition, but fortunately his son has not, which leads to a conversation about situations in life that first appear as obstacles many times become opportunities to view the world from a broader perspective.  Isn't that nice?  All from a guy who likes to sway back and forth in front of the bathroom mirror. My old roommate is very energetic, very passionate, gregarious and bombastic is the word he uses.  You won't need to strain to hear us or look at your phone to see if the volume will go up further… it'll be fine.   We start off with a short conversation that I almost left out.  I was going to leave it out because it's just too juvenile even for this show.  We used to have this gibberish language we used to speak that no one understood, no one appreciated and it, to me anyway is a bit embarrassing at how juvenile it was then and obviously is now… but we still do it.  It would almost be like listening to a couple of toddlers in a playpen talk to each other even though neither of them has the capability of speaking intelligently.  It's when my roommate says the gibberish word “Skurvathur”… I'm embarrassed saying it and I actually spelled it out in a text to him and he texted back with another gibberish word we used to use… a very riveting way to start a hard hitting podcast.  “What podcast do you listen to?  Well I listen to the true crime podcast, I listen to the conspiracy theory podcast… I listen to Joe Rogan… I listen to Pod Save America and I listen to a couple of senior citizens speak gibberish to one another.  Yeah, thank  you SO much for listening, but you might want to keep it under your hat if you're at a cocktail party and the subject of podcasts comes up… say you listen to something from NPR or something on finance… makes you sound half intelligent.  Also, either I curse more than I realize or my guest doesn't curse at all, but I spent a good deal of time bleeping out my… I'm sorry I had our production staff edit out a lot of my foul language.  Sounds more professional.  It's my college roommate on the Modern Moron... CLOSE - Isn't it nice to reminisce about the old days?  I only played Rugby for a year and I had totally forgotten about all those songs we used to sing after games and now that I think about it, most of those songs were EXTREMELY sexist.  There were songs about Dinah and a song about a guy named “Abdul Abulbul Amir” and I don't remember them being very complimentary.  There would be a chorus, and during each chorus someone from the team would put their beer stein… or red solo cup on top of their head to indicate they were  going to sing the next verse and the song would continue until no one could think of another disgusting verse.  Rugby was not played in any high schools back then and I believe a lot of high schools do have Rugby programs now, but I wonder about the after game rituals. Also, it occurred to me that the only way to learn those songs was pretty much through oral tradition.  There was no binder full of Rugby songs, there was no website for Rugby songs which by the way yes there is a website for Rugby songs and even recordings of drunken Rugby players singing those songs, they aren't very audible as most of them are slurring their words but isn't the internet… great?  Or is it? I do have more from my conversation with my old college roommate and I hope our reminiscing brought back some memories of your post high school or college years.  Man that was a long time ago and man do I have so much wisdom and so many opinions I constantly want to impart on whoever is within earshot throughout the day.  Fortunately most of the time that only involves my poor dog.   Thank you for listening… please forward this to ONE person you think might like this show and another thing about those Rugby songs?... they're a lot more entertaining after about 3 pints.   We'll see you next time on the Modern Moron…  Conditions and Diseases: Achondroplasia - Johns Hopkins Medical  Dirty Rugby Song #1 - YouTube Dirty Rugby Song #2  - YouTube

Welcome to a program where if you hear the phrase tick-tock you can rest assured we are talking about either a clock or the time of day… it's the Modern Moron Little bit of a long episode for you  and in it we spend a great deal of time talking about exclusivity.  That's a good thing right?  You hear about something being exclusive that means not everyone can get it, or experience it.  And not only does it mean you do get to experience it, most people do NOT get to experience it… whatever “it” is… they're excluded.   Now that I say it out loud, this podcast seems pretty exclusive because it's basically it's you, me and maybe one other person we don't know.  That's pretty exclusive! We talk about exclusive brands of alcohol like George Clooney's Tequila who started Casamigos Tequila in 2013 along with two other partners for about 1.8 million… so $600K a piece.  In 2018 they sold it for $1B, that's billion with a B, which made him the highest paid actor in 2018 even though he didn't make film.  So be looking for Senator Single Barrel Rye Whiskey coming to a… specialty liquor store?  Hmm I think it's going to be more exclusive than that.  You'll probably have to go straight to him. Next up, we talk about the latest investigation into Trump searching for people leaking information to the news media during his administration.  Trump went to Apple to get phone records.  The Senator is upset because he says Obama did the same thing while he was in office. Now, you know that the last thing I would ever want to do is agree blindly with the Senator.  So… I did look up a couple of things and when I say I looked it up I mean barely… no, I do not read the entire article from newspapers, that's why most decent journalists should write with the traditional inverted pyramid goddammit.   Okay, the articles I'm citing are from a NYT Op Ed.  Yes it's an opinion article BUT, it's the NY Times.  Also  Wired Magazine.  You may be thinking, “why Wired?”  And I will tell you if you'll calm down and listen to me for a second.  I chose Wired because A) I've heard of it, even though they are a tech magazine that focuses on technology as it effects areas of our life including politics, B) because it's another left leaning source… left center and C) because mediabiasfactcheck.org rates them HIGH due to proper sourcing. From a 2013 Wired article - The Department of Justice secretly obtained phone records for reporters and editors who work for the Associated Press news agency, including records for the home phones and cell phones of individual journalists, according to the AP, in what the agency characterized as "serious interference with AP's constitutional rights to gather and report the news." The records, covering all of April and May 2012, were seized by the DoJ earlier that year and covered more than 20 separate phone lines. The records listed outgoing calls for both the work and personal phone numbers of individual reporters, as well as the general phone lines for AP bureaus in New York, Washington and Hartford, Conn., and a main number used by AP reporters in the House of Representatives. And this is from the December 2016 OP ED in the New York Times:  If Donald Trump decides as president to throw a whistle-blower in jail for trying to talk to a reporter, or gets the F.B.I. to spy on a journalist, he will have one man to thank for bequeathing him such expansive power: Barack Obama. Mr. Trump made his animus toward the news media clear during the presidential campaign, often expressing his disgust with coverage through Twitter or in diatribes at rallies. So if his campaign is any guide, Mr. Trump seems likely to enthusiastically embrace the aggressive crackdown on journalists and whistle-blowers that is an important yet little understood component of Mr. Obama's presidential legacy. Criticism of Mr. Obama's stance on press freedom, government transparency and secrecy is hotly disputed by the White House, but many journalism groups say the record is clear. Over the past eight years, (remember this was written in 2016) the administration has prosecuted nine cases involving whistle-blowers and leakers, compared with only three by all previous administrations combined. It has repeatedly used the Espionage Act, a relic of World War I-era red-baiting, not to prosecute spies but to go after government officials who talked to journalists. Under Mr. Obama, the Justice Department and the F.B.I. have spied on reporters by monitoring their phone records, labeled one journalist an unindicted co-conspirator in a criminal case for simply doing reporting and issued subpoenas to other reporters to try to force them to reveal their sources and testify in criminal cases. Now I don't think this article would be allowed to go to print in the NY Times if those statements were untrue, especially citing the number of cases.  Again, I'd take Obama over Trump any day of the week as a president but it's good to point out hypocrisy when it occurs.   And of course, no politician, regardless of party affiliation, wants what they consider classified information to get leaked from someone who is supposedly on their team.   Okay, so then we get to my favorite part of this episode where the Senator tells me he's going on a retreat to one of the most exclusive social clubs on the west coast.  The fun part is trying to figure out WHO decided this club is so exclusive.  Because when I try to search for it guess which club doesn't show up in any top ten lists of exclusive clubs?  He finally has me go to the Wikipedia page for the club he's talking about, but you and I know that either of us can make any statement we want on a wikipedia page so apparently this club is so exclusive that nobody knows about it.  Hell, my house is just as exclusive as this goddamn place.  I'm the only member.  How's that for exclusive?  Okay, I've talked to much already and the episode hasn't even started.  It's time to get fancy and really exclusive on the Modern Moron. CLOSE - Wow, long winded.  By the way the tequila from way back at the beginning of the episode isn't Geroge Clooney Tequila, it's Casamigos tequila as I said. George Clooney didn't sell his name or anything, that's just me being an idiot.  That's it, thank you for listening to this 96th episode of The Modern Moron… you know, for old people.  See you next time. Geroge Clooney of George Clooney Tequila - The $1 billion sale of George Clooney's tequila company just made him 2018's highest-paid actor — here's the story of how the brand was set up by accident - Business Insider Opinion | If Donald Trump Targets Journalists, Thank Obama - NY Times  Obama Administration Secretly Obtains Phone Records of AP Journalists - Wired

I have some good news for you.  The majority of this episode doesn't involve politics!  I know, right?  A breath of fresh air.  Also, my guest is NOT the Senator!  How about that?  My guest is my OP from my radio days and like you she is coming out of  quarantine/ hibernation and like most of you… probably… she's watched a little more television, I'm sorry, streaming content in the last year and change than usual.  And we settle on talking about “The Crown” on Netflix.  Yes, it's been on for years but since when has this show ever been cutting edge about anything? Personally, I'm on season 4 of The Crown, which brings in Princess Diana and I'm finding it a bit hard to watch.  I remember my mother waking up at 4 or 5 am in the Summer of 1981 to watch the wedding.  I never knew my mom gave a hang about that stuff but there she was with the TV on.  I heard the TV on so I went in and watched it with her.  I do remember how wildly popular Princess Diana was and The Crown gives a look behind the curtain of the royal family and in many, many instances it's not pretty. In fact, speaking of being behind things like curtains, if you've watched any amount of The Crown, my observation is that the producers and directors really want you to know that these people are imprisoned as much as they are entitled.  I have found there to be lot's of camera angles depicting a solitary Queen Elizabeth in shadowed profile, lot's of long shots of the queen through hallways sitting alone at a desk or fancy chair and many shots of Royals looking out a window at what is going on at the gates of whatever palace they're in or who might be pulling up, but always looking out the window and the window panes might as well be prison bars. So, Princess Diana… I'm finding it uncomfortable to watch some of this as she was part of my generation.  She would have turned 60 on July 1st of this year.  But in season 1 we find out about a very young, soon to be Queen Elizabeth.  Much sooner than she ever could have imagined and she probably didn't imagine it at all because it was her uncle who was King.  King Edward VIII.   About 13 minutes in my guest mentions The Wallace Simpson affair.  This is the reference to the woman who King Edward fell crazy in love with to the point he abdicated the thrown. So why wasn't King Edward allowed to marry Wallis Simpson?  Well she had been married… twice.  Once was enough to put her out of the running back in the pre World War II era.  During her first marriage she was touring China and while in Beijing she had an affair  with a man, got pregnant and had a fouled up abortion, which left her infertile.  How's that for hot gossip?  I guess it's not very hot when it happened almost a hundred years ago huh? Anywho!... the guy she had an affair with?  An Italian diplomat named Galeazo Ciano, who would later go on to become the son-in-law of… Benito Mussolini.  I guess she had a thing for dictators.  Bottom line, she was bad news to the Royal family and King Edward absolutely could not marry her.  But she had him hooked big time.   You might think of her as the Yoko Ono of the Royals. So we do talk quite a bit about “The Crown” as it pertains to history and the great actors in the series.  Then we have a quick phone interview, our first, with... a politician.  My OP used to be a news director and she still has some contacts into that world so… that's all I'm going to say for now.  Call it a surprise. We talk about the Crown and talk to a Clown… on the Modern Moron… I just did that ‘cause it rhymed. CLOSE - I'm not sure how to close this episode as I'm still processing that.  Um… maybe this is what we needed to get the Modern Moron to the next level?  I don't know.  My thanks to my Old Partner and by Old I don't mean in years but my old radio partner and thanks to her for her old journalism connections. Oh! Here's how we'll wrap up since we spent most of our time talking about The Crown on Netflix.  Production has ramped back up and I believe they plan to begin shooting this July so, buy the time you get to this, they could be shooting Season 5!  There will be a new Queen Elizabeth as they have changed every two seasons.  For Season 5 Queen Elizabeth will be played by Imelda Staunton.  While that may not be a household name in the U.S., Imelda Staunton has won at least 3 Laurence Olivier Awards for either best Actress or Best Supporting performances.  The Laurence Olivier Award in Britain is the equivalent to a Tony Award over here.  In 2005 you may remember she was also the lead in a film called Vera Drake for which she was nominated for an Oscar.  Hillary Swank won that year along with Clint Eastwood as director for Million Dollar Baby. If you haven't seen Vera Drake, and you like films about the commoner, they everyday person and you don't always need special effects in your films, you will not be disappointed.  The director is Mike Leigh who was also nominated that year for Best Director and for Best Original Screenplay.  Mike Leigh is sort of a director's director who relies on improvisation and that film required 6 months of rehearsal before they began shooting the film.   You WILL remember Imelda Staunton however, from the 5th Harry Potter film “The Order of The Phoenix” where she played Delores Umbridge who took over the school to replace Albus Dumbledore at Hogwarts?  Remember how hideous she was?  Watch that performance next to Vera Drake and you'll be as big a fan of hers as I am.  Can you tell? Okay, thank you again to my OP and to you for tuning into another episode of the Modern Moron.  In fact, if you liked this episode, while you have this open… forward it to someone.  That's easier than liking or subscribing right?  Or not, just a thought.  

In this outdated installment we banter about a number of things including my great idea that  Caitlin Jenner should be on a box of Wheaties and we mention some athletes who have been on Wheaties boxes, yes they still make Wheaties, including Kyrie Irving, who the Senator doesn't know and I say he plays for the Celtics when in fact Kyrie Irving is currently with the Brooklyn Nets who are one step away from going to the Eastern conference finals! NBA playoffs https://www.nba.com/playoffs/2021 We talk briefly about the Kentucky Derby which was all they way back on May 1st.  The horse who won, Medina Spirit, had the title stripped due to failing a drug test.  The hall of fame trainer Bob Baffert, had this to say… Should there be a rush to judgement?  Should we point a finger?  On this show?  Hell yes we are, especially considering the horse failed a second drug test for the same substance.  This horse is not a team player, he's clearly an addict, the trainer is an enabler and there needs to be an intervention. What else... The Senator pisses me off in this episode and it wasn't until after I listened to it that I realized I was pissed at him the reason why is that I have to clean up the mess of his sweeping accusations.  This is what mouthy McMoutherson mouthed…  It's right after I mention Chuck Schumer, who is Jewish.  He immediately mouth's off about the cease fire in Jerusalem between Israel and Palestine which goes all the way back to May 20th so that lets you know how cutting edge this podcast is.  Anyway, He voices that he is clearly in support of Israel as is our country in case you didn't know.    But the Senator is upset that democratic leaders have not spoken out in support of Israel in this situation.  What would you have Chuck Schumer say?  That Palestine set up their military headquarters in schools and hospitals as a cowards move as you stated?  Is that his place?  And should it just be him as a Senator because he happens to be Jewish?  But that would show Schumer's insensitivity to the Muslim population and the Muslim's vote by the way.  But Islam accounts for only 1% of the California population according to a wikipedia page on California demographics.   Then he suggests… “suggests” that Israel is better off with Jerusalem as capital of Israel.  Something that Trump did while in office… a move that other presidents both democrat and Republican suggested but did not do.  Now, I'm a moron… I don't know, is it? Is Israel is better off with Jerusalem as capital? But when I press the Senator as to why that might be a good thing or not, he has no fucking answer.  So he brings up a very sensitive subject like the middle east and the capital of Israel being Jerusalem and say, “I don't know”.   Why is that controversial.  It depends on who you ask. So why did Trump do it: He fulfilled a campaign promise… period.  And he did it while a number of other presidents talked about doing it but did not… actually since 1995 at least.  HOWEVER it was said the promise was kept, POSSIBLY, at the expense of the peace process.  Is the peace process more important than where Israel's capital is located?  That answer is going to be different for different people I think. Here's what's in Jerusalem that are so important to three of the worlds main religions: Dome of the Rock and the Al Aqsa Masque right next to it is the 3rd holiest site in Islam. Maybe 50 feet from that is The Western Wall is a pilgrimage site where Jews from all over the world come to pray. Then the Church of the Holy Sepulchre is only about 5-600 Yards away from those… so, a long par 5 and THAT'S a long ways from the other two comparatively.  The Church of the Holy Sepulchre is where many Christians believe Jesus was crucified.  Pretty significant place if you hold Christianity close to you.  Frankly, I spoke to Jesus about this and he said, “aren't there airplanes and ships that can take you anywhere to practice your faith… go ahead, spread out.  There's plenty of nice real estate in other places.” We end on a lighter note, thank God, when ding dong brags to me that he's purchased himself some Wagu beef.  First of all, and neither of us should be surprised by this, he mispronounced it.  It's called Wagyu Beef.  Wagyu beef is a breed of cattle developed in Japan crossing Wagyu cows with other European cattle to develop a beef that has three times more marbling fat than U.S. prime-grade beef.  So this meat has more evenly distributed fat in the meat, otherwise known as marbling.  That fat distributes throughout the steak giving you a tender, flavorful experience, which the Senator would like you to  know is very expensive.  That's the main thing. So thank you Senator for this extraordinarily long introduction to tie up the loose ends of your big mouth.  Thank you for listening to this episode that should melt in your ears like an auditory Wagyu steak…

Welcome to another Episode… So the Senator is back from his whirlwind trip to the Grand Canyon to hike from the South Rim to the North rim and I know he can’t wait to talk about it.  So naturally I give him a laundry list of other topics to discuss to keep him from talking about his true love… himself.  However... The Senator jumps on Kamala Harris, noting her last press conference was over two months ago, since being named to head the border situation.  So in the show description I will put a link to a story from the LA Times which defends and criticizes her at the same time for not going down to the border or holding a press conference.  He also goes back to his favorite Willie Brown/ Kamala Harris relationship claiming in no uncertain terms that the vice president slept her way to a position as a Supervisor in the city of San Francisco.  Wow.  She was actually the District Attorney for San Francisco.     Then we talk for a few minutes about a facetime call we did that included a mutual friend and his wife as well as the Senator’s daughter, who has been a guest on this show.  She changes her hair color weekly, partly because her mother is a licensed beautician and… how cool is that.  So I give her a hard time about changing her hair color every week and she questions how horribly her father and I treat each other considering that we are supposed to be friends.  She’s got a point.     And then… we can’t put it off any longer and we talk about the big hike through the Grand Canyon. And in all fairness his hike was a huge accomplishment.  It was a very grueling hike to the bottom of the Grand Canyon, across and back up non-stop.     And so… Here’s our episode, “Where is Kamala Harris?  She’s not protesting at the border anymore, not is she holding press conferences and I don’t think they found her in the Grand Canyon either.  Maybe she’s hanging out with Waldo in a very crowded picture book.  Thanks for listening... CLOSE - So there you have it, a major accomplishment for one of us over 55.  I think he’s over 55 and if he is not, I’m very sure we’ll hear about it very soon.  Hope you have or had a wonderful Memorial Day holiday wherever you are  Republicans aren’t alone in saying Kamala Harris should visit the southern border - LA Times

Welcome to another episode of the Modern Moron… I sit and listen to the opinions coming out of our mouths and I just think where the hell do either of us think we are coming off with these grand opinions about shit neither of us has a fucking clue about.  I’ve never been to Europe, I know nothing… noth-thing about any culture even in this country and yet I truly think my analysis is infallible.  For realzies.  The humility gene… literally fell off our DNA strand.   We start our conversation in grand style as the Senator inquires about the location of the Oscars a few months ago at Los Angeles’ Union Station.  From this, the Senator works his way to Dr. Anthony Fauci and implies the senior medical advisor to numerous presidents graduated last in his class in medical school.  So, I take the bait as I usually do, as if the Senator has any room to talk about academic achievements.  This is from a site called biography.com…  Dr. Fauci graduated from College of the Holy Cross in Worcester, Massachusetts as a pre-med. After graduating first in his class from New York City's Cornell Medical College in 1966, he completed his internship and residency at New York Hospital-Cornell Medical Center.   So basically, the exact opposite of what my idiot first partner claimed.  Complete opposite… solidifying his seat at the head of the Moron’s table.  At least you’re number one at something Senator.  Good for you. Again… he set me up and its my fault for taking the bait.  Of all people to criticize how another person speaks.  (senator) Need I say more? Finally  we hit upon a topic that is more our speed, which is an app?... called memmo.  Memmo  with two m’s.  You can go there and have celebrities, send a video or audio message to a friend or family member.  And this site’s idea of a celebrity is VERY broad.  I don’t know most of them which is partially due to my age and not being in touch with society, but a good portion is due to what constitutes a celebrity these days, which is not much. So I hope you find something in this episode that is informative, educational (probably not) or entertaining. Thanks for listening... CLOSE - While we're on the subject of sports, Running back Ricky Williams who was  mentioned earlier went to the University of Texas and then played three years for the New Orleans Saints, eight years for the Miami Dolphins, and his final season in 2011 for the Baltimore Ravens. He also played one year in the Canadian football league and four years in the Philadelphia Phillies minor league system.  So, there’s more information about Ricky Williams than you probably wanted.   Chocolate Rain is a song recorded, put on YouTube and went viral back in 2007.  This kid was a professor’s assistant at a university in Minnesota and he “blew up” as they say.  The dang video currently has over 130 million views… how about that?  And the theme song from the movie Brian’s Song that you heard a snippet of was composed by Henry Mancini.  You can always come here for you daily dose of trivia.    Covered a lot of ground on this episode… I wouldn’t necessarily say fertile ground but it was covered none the less.  Hope you have a great week and we’ll see you next time on the Modern Moron.   Thanks for listening.

Welcome to another month-old episode of the modern moron.  Not because you’re just getting around to it, but because I’m just getting around to it.  So by the time you get around to it, this episode with be months old rather than just one month old.  See there?  Leading of with some really valuable information.   Speaking of pointless, In this episode the Senator talks about his desire to go to the Grand Canyon, Hike from one side to the other, probably at night, and then come back home as soon as he’s finished.  I don’t get it… why go to such a beautiful place that’s considered one of the 7 natural wonders of the world, and then get through it as quickly as possible… half of it at night, and then leave?  Why not stay and enjoy its beauty?  Do you do it just so you can say you did it?  In the Senator’s case, I think so.  I think combined with his severe case of FOMO, fear of missing out, he is far more interested in telling other people he had an experience rather than experiencing the experience.  Getting that guy to just sit down and stop running in the rat race is like getting a monkey to stop eating a banana…. It’s not gonna happen. About halfway through… right after we talk briefly about getting vaccinated, we start to wrap it up and the Senator says he’s glad I’m doing well, but the guy never once asked me how I was doing.  All he did was launch into his 50 yard dash to the Grand Canyon and back.  Naturally, I call him on his poppycock.   What else, I do talk about my disappointment at the country opening back up.  I’d rather stay in quarantine for the rest of my life.  And we talk about where we are going to retire, without the Senator taking into account where his wife would like to retire.  You’d think that guy would learn for Christ’s sake.  I need to get his wife on this program… then we’ll find out where he’s really going to retire. So there you have it.  I’m thinking right now you must be either very lonely or very bored to be listening to us two idiots, but I sincerely thank you for doing so.   CLOSE - Who can’t use a little more tolerance?  Because we are always so far behind in our episodes we don’t address the most recent events of the day, week or even the month, but recently we heard President Biden address congress with probably the biggest program of… some will say investing in the future of this country, others will say just plain ol’ spending.  But I think the most heartfelt moment of his speech came from this clip...  All seriousness aside, here is a clip… and I cannot believe he said this as I can’t believe some lunkhead network analyst didn’t jump all over this.  He was talking about child care, I believe, for children under 6 years old, and I doubt any republican would deny that childcare is not an important issue to be addressed, it’s the “how it gets done” part that divides everyone.  But the president, after passing an almost $2 Trillion dollar stimulus package, said these four magic words… Excuse me?  What was that?  I truly believe he went off script for those four words and I don’t think they were wisely chosen.  I don’t think the president has a real idea of what we can and cannot afford because all I hear him say is that we cannot afford not to… is that a double negative?  And when he did finally address the “how” of paying for all of this?  He talked about where it would not come from, the middle class, of which I am a member.  I’m not a one percenter like the Senator.  But the Senator and I need to have a talk about what a “fair share” is, because I heard Biden say that phrase quite a bit, fair share. I’m wondering at what income levels do we go from poverty, to lower class, and to middle class,  upper middle class, and finally the elusive upper-class.  I wonder if I  can get the Senator to agree on some level that as we move up that latter, the rungs get farther and farther apart.  And by that I mean, how many incremental dollars does it take to get to the next level?  And by next level, I mean to the next “standard of living”.  So does an extra $10,000 mean the same to someone making $40,000 as $10M means to someone making $40M?  Does someone taking home $30 million have to change their standard of living compared to someone taking home $30 million.  And, does someone taking home $30,000 have to change their standard of living compared to someone taking home $40,000?  Percentage-wise, yes they are the same but I wonder if the Senator would agree that $10,000 means more to a poverty level person than $10M makes to someone making 10’s of millions of dollars? I also heard a financial “expert” say that (paraphrasing) the top 1 or 5% income earners in this country, under Biden’s proposal, will take home approximately 40% of the additional income they make above what they normally make.  40%... when I hear that I have to say it almost doesn’t seem worth it to make the additional when someone else is taking more than half.  Is that a fair share?   Maybe...maybe, Biden’s proposal is just a starting place for negotiations… like the sticker price on a car.  Because he’s asking for expenditures similar to what FDR was asking for when he took office in 1933… at least I have heard that comparison; that we are in a similar position as a nation and globally.  So let the negotiating begin hopefully.

Hello!  Yes, this is an episode of The Modern Moron… and like an aging Snow Leopard, increasingly rare to find.  Does that increase the value of a Modern Moron episode… I’m gonna say no, we’re not like a snow leopard or a bitcoin. In this rambling episode, the senator is not in a good place… the news has him down.  But when does the news, by and large, ever have you up?  It always leads with the latest tragedy and ends with something on the lighter side so you don’t jump out a window after the broadcast.  But I think generally what has the Senator down is hypocrisy.  It’s latest example is Grandpa Joe’s infrastructure plan of over 2 Trillion Dollars.   So the Senator thinks it’s all hypocrisy, and he’s right to a degree.  However, what’s infrastructure to the ding dong Dems may not be to the rude righteous Republicans.  For example, and this is for the Senator in particular because I just looked this up… a good portion of Trumps infrastructure package included the category of National Security, which for Trump is the great homage to his ego, the border wall of Mexico.  Also, power and energy independence to one party is VASTLY different to the other party.  Trump still wanted to mine coal.  Need I say more?  No I don’t. Also, I think it’s worth mentioning this… Spending government money on infrastructure, however you define it, doesn’t just by roads, bridges, public transportation, renewable energy and so on… this huge amount of money doesn’t just buy those things, it also buys votes.  It takes a lot of people to build infrastructure and every single one of those people have a vote in 2024… unless you live in Georgia then you may or may not get recognized to vote… or so I’m told. So a good portion of this episode addresses the Stimulus package, but some other politicians get honorable mention as well.  The Senator mentions Governor Mario Cuomo, sometimes referring to him as ‘Fredo from the Godfather.  Cuomo has been under investigation for sexual misconduct.  I wonder how much sexual misconduct investigations there would be if government was run by women?  Something else would HAVE to take its place.  I wonder what it would be?  I digress… There is also a trio of Republican idiots who desperately want to take up the Trump flag and are trying their best to show that bad, outrageous indignant behavior can win votes.  The three stooges I refer to are Florida Governor Ron Desantis, the idiot from Texas, Senator Ted Cruz and finally Florida Representative Matt Gaetz..   The Senator is bothered by this idiot Matt Gaetz in particular, and he should be, but thankfully… with the absence of our former idiot in Chief I have found it MUCH EASIER to ignore politics with the new idiot.  So I have to start from square one with this used car salesman-ey looking Gaetz.  He looks like he could be one of Trump’s sons.  Am I judging a book by it’s cover?  You bet… isn’t that what book covers are made for?  To make them look interesting.  Well this guy definitely looks interesting … for an episode of to catch a predator.  This guy is actually representing the state of Florida in Washington DC.  He should be sitting right next to that spear-nosed idiot Ted Cruz.  Both of  those guys should seriously have their own versions of The Jerry Springer Show… by the way Jerry Springer was the 56th Mayor of Cincinati, Ohio… so you see? Politics is the perfect training ground to host Tabloid lowest common denominator talk shows.  The senator is just down on all the politicians in the news now and I bring up Stacy Abrams who was the Democratic nominee in the 2018 Georgia gubernatorial election, becoming the first African-American female major-party gubernatorial nominee in the United States.  She did not win, but I’m pretty sure we’ll be seeing more of Stacey Abrams in the next elections.  I really like Stacey Abrams right now and I make a sexist comment… shocking… regarding the electability of Stacey versus our current vice president because of looks.  I truly do hat e to say it but I think it’ s a factor.  For the record, I would take one Stacey Abrams over ten Kamala Harris’. We join the Senator who requested this recording session, and is not using the microphone I bought for him, nor is he using headphones… which are pretty essential for any podcast to have a decent sound.  What’s the name of this show again?... We’re Concerned Over Cuomo, Bummed Over Biden and Harangued about Hypocrisy on The Modern Moron.  Thanks for listening…  CLOSE - the only thing better than a couple of morons talking politics is two morons talking about a religion of which they know nothing.  Ganesh doesn't ride an elephant as the senator said.  Ganesh, is the elephant-headed Hindu god who rides a mouse, is one of the faith's most important deities and is one of the primary Hindu deities. He is the lord of success and the destroyer of evils and obstacles, worshiped as the god of education, wisdom, and wealth.  Isn’t that nice? I’d like to end on a lighter note, just like those depressing newscasts and this is right in our demographic: Who will be the next host of Jeopardy? This is turning into what I imagine is a great ratings grabber in and of itself.  The producers claim there will be a permanent host for Jeopardy next season, which starts taping at the end of July.  So far candidates have been auditioning for a couple of weeks at a time and the last host I saw was Green Bay Packers Quarterback Aaron Rogers.  He is all in on this and had prepared for it like he prepares for games by watching hours and hours of tape of Alex Trebek including watching episodes with the sound off and hosting in place of Trebek.  Other hosts so far have included Katie Couric, Doctor Oz, former Jeopardy champion Ken Jennings.  Slated to host-slash-audition in the coming weeks are: Savannah Guthrie from NBC’s Today Show, Mayim Bialik from The Big Bang Theory, 60 Minutes correspondents Bill Whitaker and Dr. Sanjay Gupta but not together… also, Anderson Cooper and even Fox Sports announcer Joe Buck, no thank you.  One tweet regarding Joe Buck as host summed it up best: “Can we not make Joe Buck the next permanent host of Jeopardy, he can barely make football interesting, let alone a gameshow.” There is even a grass roots petition being drummed up for Levar Burton.  I’d take Levar Burton over Joe Buck any day.   So there’s something trivial for you to occupy your mind for a half a minute, although if you’ve just listened to this podcast, you’ve probably reached your mindlessness quotient for the entire week.  Either way, have a great week, thank you for listening and we’ll see you next time… Ganesha, the Hindu God of Success   

My guest is my friend and stand up comedian Christine Lederman who has been on the program a couple of times. Christine talks about her recent experience doing live standup again… in Texas.  Keep in mind she had this gig in Houston in February...  just before the horrible freezing temperatures hit Texas.  We talk about getting out of Houston just in time before the freeze hit  and what it was like to perform in front of an audience again.  She also talks about gauging an audience’s potential response to different material based on where she’s performing in the country and that audiences in Texas are great and possibly more liberal in terms of being receptive to politically incorrect humor… We talk about a few of the cities where Christine has done standup in Texas and even though Texas is by and very large a Red state, there are a number of fairly liberal minded cities as well, primarily Austin, which is a college town and home to the South-by-Southwest festival which has grown enormously since it began way back in 1987 as well as San Antonio and Dallas.   Also, if you’re a proud Texan or are going to be in Texas in Two weeks… two weeks being April 26th and 27th, you can catch Christine at the Addison Improv in Dallas Texas… Addison is about 15 miles north of Dallas and it’s the Improv so you know it’s classy. I catch up with her just as the big blizzard is about to hit the Denver area where she lives.  It’s Queen Christine and the Colorado Blizzard on The Modern Moron and thanks for listening… CLOSE - No such thing as a common cold anymore America. You know earlier I said there weren’t any comedy clubs in Amarillo Texas, well you will be shocked to find out that I was wrong.  There are at least two!  There’s the Funny Bone Comedy Club and Bristol’s Comedy club in Amarillo and boy are they going to be packed after a plug from the Modern Moron.  My thanks to Christine Lederman for spending a little time with the moron and don’t forget she will be at the Addison Improv in Dallas Texas on March 26th and 27th.  That’s it for now, hope you get your vaccine shot soon, if you want one that is, Take care and thank you for listening... 

Welcome to another episode…  Man have I put off publishing this episode and I’m not sure why… maybe it’s that there’s nothing particularly topical but since when has this program ever been topical?   Do you ever go to YouTube with the intention of looking something up and get side-tracked by another video that looked interesting.  Meeeee too!  That doesn’t happen by accident.  YouTube knows you, knows what you’re interested in and suggests videos that keep you there longer… as long as possible just like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and all the other social media sites. In this episode the Senator and I talk about some of those rabbit holes.  From inspiring interviews from holocaust survivors to Supreme Court Justice Earl Warren.   We also get into some streaming shows that we are both wayyyyyy behind the curve on as we are with most things, like Wandavision!  Naturally in talking about the show Wandavision the senator makes it about himself and how great he looks in a turtleneck.  Wanna find out how Wandavision leads to the Senator wearing turtlenecks?  Keep listening.   Then we get onto a show that has been on Netflix for almost ten years called Black Mirror.  Can something be a spoiler alert if it’s 10 years old?  If you plan on watching Black Mirror, season 5, Episode 1 titled “Striking Vipers”, then don’t listen… otherwise you’ve had ample time for what I’m about to tell you.  What struck me about this episode is that it kinda made me feel uncomfortable in it’s sexuality.  Two men have a sexual relationship, but neither of them are gay.  The have their sexual relationship virtually inside a video game.  One of them really wants to continue the relationship and the other, who is married… to a woman, is losing his mind over the whole thing, and I sort of did too.  I highly recommend this show and if you only watch one episode, please watch the second episode from season 5 called “Smithereens”.  The main character is played by Andrew Scott who is an Irish character actor that makes this episode worth watching along with the rest of the cast.  So please watch that episode… there will be a quiz on Thursday. We wind up somehow segueing to Keith Moon and that the Senator would liked to have partied with him.  Also an interesting story from Helen Miren about the late drummer.  Hope that covers enough ground for ya.   CLOSE - The drug Keith Moon overdosed on was called Clomethiazole which is a sedative used in treating and preventing symptoms of acute alcohol withdrawal.  So what are your guilty pleasures when it comes to YouTube?  Is it TedX talks or is it videos of kittens and people falling and hurting themselves?  Here’s something topical for you if you don’t already know, YouTube is coming out with their version of Tik Tok which all the kids use and it’s called YouTube Shorts.  You can create 60-second clips in vertical format, as most people view the screen on their smartphones.   YouTube Shorts also allows users to: Edit videos with creative tools Splice clips together Add music from YouTube’s library Change video speed Add timers and countdowns All in an effort to compete with Tik Tok to take ownership of more of your time and attention. That’s it for now, please like, subscribe comment or just spend more time staring at the logo for this podcast so I can claim more of your attention… Have a great day, week or weekend and we’ll see you next time...

OPEN:  Kind of a hodgepodge for you today, including the etymology of the word hodgepodge which is "a kind of stew, especially "one made with goose, herbs, spices, wine, and other ingredients." Earlier it was an Anglo-French legal term meaning "collection of property in a common 'pot' before dividing it equally" (late 13c.). Immediately that doesn’t make sense to me.  So… first it was a legal term meaning a collection of property and then it became goose stew?  See how I can take a throw-away thing like a definition and turn it into a rabbit hole? Among other nonsense the Senator and I discuss briefly are:  White Privilege should not include males under 5’8” who are bald The Kansas City Chiefs name is racist and needs to be changed A Buccaneer is a racist term  Rape is okay if it’s in the name of freedom Paul Revere was gay Superbowl Advertising Costs this year  SKD Knickerbocker is not a brand of pants at the GAP, it’s a political consulting firm We start of with the Senator playing “Alone Again, Naturally” by Gilbert O’sullivan as if this is a great idea…. After that we mainly try to stay away from politics and talk about the Superbowl, which is obviously over now, but we keep going back to politics like a couple of moronic moths drawn to a flame.  No offense to any moths who may be listening.  About thirty minutes in the Senator goes off on a jag about Alex Padilla.  Alex Padilla is California’s former Secretary of State- now Senator in Washington DC taking Kamala Harris’ place.  Here is our Senator’s beef with the newly appointed Senator Alex Padilla: During Padilla’s time in office as S.O.S. he awarded a contract for $35 million dollars to an organization called SKD Knickerbocker which is  a public affairs and political consulting firm that specializes in working for Democratic Party politicians.   SKD Knickerbocker created a voter outreach campaign called Vote Safe California.  At least some of the funds to pay them came from the CARES Act which is the Coronavirus Aid, Relief and Economic Security (CARES) Act. Did the campaign cost $35M?  I don’t know.  But guess who is  VERY closely tied to President-slash-Grandpa Joe?  SKD Knickerbocker.  In fact, Anita Dunn, who is one of the firm’s partners and founding members was part of the Biden campaign and per the New York Times, was "elevated" during 2020 to essentially having "effective control of the campaign."  So, the Senator is  going to tell you later that California Secretary of State Alex Padilla paid SKD Knickerbocker $35M from their invoices by using local funds, which included federal money allocated through the Coronavirus CARES Act.  So one might make the claim that Coronavirus relief funds went indirectly to the Biden campaign.  I wouldn’t make that claim, but there are a number of republicans in Washington (surprise!) who are asking about it and are not getting answers.  So that is what you will hear our senator get tee’d off about.  Here’s what tee’s me off about this story: when I went to research this… and we’re talking moron research not journalism, I searched and searched and the only recognizable news source I could find was Fox News.  Of course Fox News is going to run a slanderous story on a democrat, and I’m not interested in that.  So I kept searching Alex Padilla plus… 35 MILLION DOLLARS, the Help America Vote Act, and finally… when I combined Alex with the CARES Act, I found a news story from Newsweek Magazine.  Hell, I even wrote to the journalist who wrote the goddamn article because, not surprisingly, both the offices of Mr. Padilla and Mr. Newsome did not have a response at the time of publication.  Will I hear back from the journalist?  I don’t know… have you left this stupid podcast a good rating or made a comment?  There’s your answer.   What pisses me off about this story is that the always accused liberal media… and most news sources are left leaning… it’ a goddamn fact… they don’t choose to cover a story when it’s about a democrat.  And if you tack on that the democrat is a Latino who is the first Latino to represent  California in the Senate.  Mmmm… might not be worth the blowback.   So here for you is The Modern Moron’s clunky episode with lots of Valentine’s Love sent straight to you with a kiss… thank you for listening.   CLOSE:  Politics… is obviously about money and power.  And I do believe there are people who get into politics with the absolute best of intentions.  But it becomes obvious very quickly that you can do more good with more money.  And if you just cut a corner here or look the other way there, you can get some more money to do more good.  But things get cloudy and murky and the corner you cut to help your good cause might be damaging someone else’s cause.  Gross… I don’t see how they keep the energy to exist in that toxic environment.   I wonder what the egos are like in the Senate?  We know the Lindsay Grams and the Nancy Pelosi’s and the Ted Cruz’s have an elevated sense of themselves, they couch it in their religion or some other pretentious bullshit but the ego is there puffing up every day… how their message is more righteous and the other party’s message is so damaging to the country.  What a happy note to end on… How about congratulations to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and let’s not pay attention to the impeachment trial going on in DC with one side trying to keep a sociopath from holding public office ever again and the other side upholding the freedom of speech for a violence inciting sociopath who says in his speech to walk to the capital peacefully, that he’s responsible for the violence.  Don't’ get me wrong, I can’t stand Trump as a president but how do you convict a guy for inciting violence when he literally says go peacefully.  He is so toxic to this country, but don’t hate HIM because, once again, he covered his bases enough to elude conviction.  They don’t call him The Teflon Don for nothing.  And with a rimshot… and a silly sound effect… we can all end with a chuckle… Thank you for listening to the Modern Moron and have a great week America.   The Bald Truth - Matt Dilliard - YouTube  Newly Appointed Calif. Senator Alex Padilla Faces GOP-Sought Probe Over State Contract - Newsweek Superhumans: The remarkable brain waves of high-level meditators | Daniel Goleman | Big Think - YouTube

Welcome to The Modern Moron and we’re going to get straight to it as we take somewhat of a deep dive into the Beatles.  My guest is our college student who, due to the pandemic, was plucked from her liberal arts college in New York where she had access to not only the college life and professors teaching art, but also the museums of Manhattan that contain a good deal of the art she is studying.  All of that, gone and put back in her childhood bedroom to study virtually on a series of zoom meetings. But things are looking up.  There’s a pretty good chance she’ll be going back to school in August and I’m pretty sure she can’t wait. We eventually get around to the actual point of the episode which are two papers she wrote in a class on The Beatles: she did one paper on the Song “Helter Skelter” by Paul McCartney on the White Album, and a paper on Geroge Harrison’s growth as a song writer and guitarist using one of his earliest songs… maybe his first?  A song called “Dont’ Bother Me” on their album “With the Beatles. We also talk about his iconic song “While My Guitar Gently Weeps”  We also do some commiserating about our common … what’s the word to use?  Our common craw?  Our common conundrum?  That being the Senator whom she now lives with 24/7 as opposed to being on her own in Manhattan.  So we both vent about him for a half a minute. It’s the Beatles Papers, Zoom Fatigue and other Tangential topics on the Modern Moron!  CLOSE: Patty Boyd… she must have been taking some … supplements or something huh?  George Harrison AND Eric Clapton?  We should do a separate episode on Patty Boyd right?   Real quick, the song “Something” by George Harrison you heard was not George Harrison as some of you may have recognized.  As our guest said, “Something” is one of the most covered of all Beatles songs and that was Jeff Lynn of Electric Light Orchestra.  Lynn worked with George on some of his solo work as well as being a member of The Traveling Wilbury’s that included George Harrison and Jeff Lynn.  That performance was part of a Grammy’s tribute to the Beatles in 2014 and I include it because additional vocals and guitar was provided by George Harrison's son Dahni. Sorry this episode was so long that’s what she said but when you have such an interesting guest and subject matter that’s what happens.  Thank you for listening and we’ll see you next time!

I don’t think “Welcome” is the right word for this episode in that it is a mess.  We’re unfocused and all over the place… kind of like our country right now.  We’re post riot and pre inauguration or ig-nauguration if you’re the Senator and it really doesn’t feel great right now being an American, at least for me.  No one seems happy.  I supposed democrats are relatively happy because Mao Tse Trump is leaving office but no matter where you are on the spectrum, things are not good in this country.  So much unrest and dis-ease, it doesn’t feel good.  Maybe we’ve taken so much for granted for so long, we’re being jarred out of our cushy country’s consumerist tendencies and we need to wake up.   A couple of things we go over that bears a mention going in: we talk about the filibuster.  Now I don’t know about you, but this moron didn’t even really know what a filibuster was until recently.  So, I’d like to address it briefly so you know what this moron’s understanding is of the filibuster.  A filibuster is a form of obstruction and it occurs when a bill comes up and a senator or representative raises a question for debate relating to the bill.  The debate can continue on and on and on unless a “supermajority” can be reached rather than the original majority that would have been needed before someone raises the question and therefore the debate.  A supermajority is a 3/5ths vote (60%) instead of 51%.   In many cases the points made in the debate have nothing to do with the bill at all.   Here are a couple of examples courtesy of a BBC article (link in the description): In 1935 Louisiana Democrat Huey Long tried to quash a bill by talking for more than 15 hours, reciting recipes for Roquefort salad dressing and discussing in detail the best way to fry oysters. Twenty-two years later, the South Carolina Senator Strom Thurmond, set a record by filibustering a civil rights bill for 24 hours and 18 minutes, reading aloud the voting laws of each US state and quoting George Washington's farewell address in its entirety. Sometimes filibustering a bill might be more commonly referred to as “talking a bill do death”, or “talking out a bill”, “stonewalling”... or how about cock-blocking.  Isn’t that a form of filibuster?   So we cover that wonderful aspect of our government and a tool that may serve the Republicans in the upcoming Democratic Senate, even though it’s democratic by only one vote.   We finish by talking about the military style sendoff Trump is asking for on the morning he departs the White House before the inauguration of Grandpa Joe Biden, complete with military band, soldiers and hopefully a flyover.  Isn’t that completely contrary to the Republican platform in terms of wasteful spending of our tax dollars?  How much do you think the sendoff he’s asking for will cost?  Wednesday is going to be so much fun. With all that is going on in the world, all that is going on in this country we start by talking about, guess what?  That’s right.  We start by talking  about the Senator and the fact that he can’t get his $250 Apple Earpods to pair with his PC so he has to switch over to his $250 Beats by Dre headphones.  See how difficult life can be America?  Wherever you are I hope life is being more kind to you than it is to our friend The Senator.  Let’s reach out to him right now with some positive energy and well wishes and thank you for listening to The Modern Moron… The art of the filibuster: How do you talk for 24 hours straight? - BBC News 

OPEN Hey Morons!  How are you?  Wanna talk politics?  Me neither.  You know, I had weaned myself of off politics for most of the summer and into the fall but I got sucked back in, or rather, I allowed myself to get re-addicted to it on Wednesday, January 6th, 2021.  I’m sure you have been inundated with it so this will be a break from that!  We reminisce briefly about a couple of  comedy albums we listened to as kids and as teens, from Cheech & Chong to Richard Pryor to Bill Cosby.  Remember he used to be a comedian?  He’s not so funny anymore.  We only mention a few… Who were the comedians of your youth?  Steve Martin who was really the first comedian to actually fill stadiums for a concert.  Or maybe Eddie Murphy?  Or even Gabe Kaplin?  Remember him?  He turned his standup about growing up in New York into the sit-com “Welcome Back Kotter” that launched the career of John Travolta.  The comedy album that did it was called Gabe Kaplan: Holes and Mellow rolls.  “Up your hole with a mellow roll” was one of the things they used to say as kids in Brooklyn I think, according to the album.  And I believe a mellow roll was an ice cream treat you’d get off the ice cream truck.  We then get into a discussion about the ego and how the Senator maybe needs to find a way to keep his ego in check.  And it’s HIS idea!  It’s very enlightening.  It gets especially enlightening when no sooner do we finish talking about ego, he ends up going on about all the celebrities he’s had his picture taken with.  Wow.  Talk about irony. Then… the Senator has an idea for a movie.  But first the Senator decides to try his hand at singing.  He knew I was recording and he did it anyway.  But I hope you’ll find it’s interesting to listen to this first episode of 2021 at the beginning under the notion that Trump is on his way out and probably not going to cause any more problems… fat chance.  Thank you for listening to the Modern Moron…   

The Modern Moron is very excited to have a high school senior as a guest on this episode.  We talk about how it sucks to be a senior in a pandemic.  How about that word… “sucks”?  Expressions for what is cool or hip or “bad”... remember when if something was “bad” that meant it was good?  But the term “sucks” seems to have remained a constant in the vernacular of teens everywhere.  Doesn’t that make you feel good? We talk about being a student.  What it’s like to head into college not knowing exactly what you want to study.  We also stumble upon the subject of “mean girls”.  From preteen through middle school and high school, there is this “mean girl” mentality.  It really makes me curious about the why’s of the mean girl mentality.   I have a couple of articles that I reference, the links are at the bottom of the show description as always. One article is from WebMD, which I consider to be a reasonable source.  The other is from Psychology Today Magazine.  Here is one paragraph I found very interesting: “Girls start from a point of weakened self-esteem: 69 percent of girls between the ages of 7 and 21 feel they are "not good enough," according to a 2016 Girls’ Attitude Study. Many younger ones already know the pain of exclusion and instant reputation loss via social-media outlets. The same study done in 2017 revealed that half of the 7-to-10-year-olds worried about being bullied online. A University of Oxford study of boys and girls’ technology use makes the concern over our daughters being bullied seem very wise: Girls aged 8 to 18 spend more time on their cellphones socializing than do boys, who focus more on playing video games.” This is obviously exacerbated by this pandemic.  Our children are online more and there using technology to socialize to some degree.  I think??? Video games have become much more of a social activity with online gaming… do you other old farts even know about this.  I remember my guests brother playing Mine Craft 5 to 7 years ago online with his friends wearing a headset.  That’s the way kids play and socialize now.  My daughter plays a bunch of games in a platform called Roblox.  They socialize while they’re playing.  So far my rule is, no headphones or at least limit the use of headphones.  I can’t be looking over her shoulder constantly, neither of us wants that.  But I can listen to what the hell is going on and if I hear something I don’t like I can crash the party.   The following is in an article from greatschools.org titled, “Why are those girls so mean?” “Of course, not all girls are nasty and belong to cliques. But whether or not they are “in” or “out,” all girls will be affected by the actions of cliques because these behaviors are all around them. They need to understand how this social pecking order works, how they can act differently in their relationships and rise above it.” Technology makes it easy for kids to be anonymous in their meanness, and spread rumors and gossip like wildfire far beyond the school grounds.  And with the ease of use, 1) they don’t realize what they are doing, and 2) they can’t take it back.” I’m not offering any solutions or even opinions really, just something to look at that we all know is already there, hopefully with some resources I’ve found that maybe you haven’t looked at yet. “They think they’re better than everyone”.  I would say, since I know SO much about the opposite sex, that these “mean girls” don’t think they’re better than everyone.  I have a feeling they might be very afraid and insecure that they aren’t even close to being as good, as nice, as pretty, as funny, as ANYyone; they’re not as good as or worthy.  It becomes a panicked anxiety and the coping method that seems to work for them (temporarily) is to belittle everyone around them, to protect the what little low self esteem they have.  They’re self esteem rises relative to you after I put you down. Any new person introduced to the group, especially another girl, represents a threat to their status in the group.  If I belittle you, I preserve my status.  If I allow you into the group, there is a chance you will displace me and lower my status.  It’s a survival mechanism.  Maybe there needs to be a paradigm shift in the way we view bullies.  Bullies are crying out for help.  They’re completely afraid of losing whatever status they think they’ve built up.  They’re very sad people and they don’t need to be.  Most of us… I mean them… did I say us?  That was totally a … whatever.  Um, what were we talking about? But why girls more than boys?  Is it that way?  A lot of male bullying is structured and even sanctioned on the athletic field.  Trash talking is a form of bullying isn’t it? How far do you have to go… or how far can you go, before you get called for unsportsmanlike conduct?  Quite a ways if it’s team sports.  If I can get inside your head and mess up your game, make you think I’m better than you or that you are going to fail, that’s a psychological win isn’t it?  Icing the kicker in football is a legit strategy.  Maybe they should call it bullying the kicker.  I mean after all, it’s the kicker right, they’re not even real football players anyway right?  See, I did it right there.   I wonder if this mean girl syndrome is as prevalent with girls who are active on athletic teams as with girls who do not participate in sports.  And for now I’m going to say cheerleading doesn’t count.  Yeah, sexist right?  But in the lexicon of the cheerleader, what used to be one of the first requirements?  She had to be pretty.  That might have been the neanderthal breeding grounds for the evolution of the mean girl.  Or… I could be completely full of shit.  Ha!  That’s impossible. And why are boys perceived as being more laid back?  Is it because of a male dominated society where they know they’re going to get their share whereas females have to fight and scrap for every slice of the pie they get?  I have no answers… only questions. We join our conversation with my guest speaking about a nursing degree or some degree in the medical field.   CLOSE - Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.  Remember that book?  Man, it ain’t easy being a teenager… at any time let alone during a pandemic when you’ve been brought up to think life is going to go a certain way and then the universe says, “hold on… change of plans”.  I guess life is a succession of those types of moments, both big and small.  Maybe one of the barometers of a good life is your ability to navigate those changes in plans with integrity…wow.  That was gross.  At least coming from my moron hypocrite pie hole. As for the mean girl mentality, I think awareness that it exists is the first step in stopping it.  I clearly don’t know what I’m talking about.  Tina Fey wrote the book on the mean girls phenomenon, or at least the screenplay…

Welcome to what is probably the last episode of The Modern Moron… for 2020.  Maybe the best thing about this episode is that it’s short!  So why include it?  I have a couple of reasons, one being that it’s short.  This episode covers the tail end of our conversation where the Senator is getting weepy about people who have died this year in the music entertainment industry and he mentions Eddie Van Halen’s passing and I have be en working on an episode on just Eddie Van Halen which I will probably never finish.  The second reason, and this is the main reason, is that The Senator, in his fantasy world, mentions in passing that people consider him to be a well rounded person.  And I don’t let this go.  Most of  us think about our selves most of the time… what’s on my to-do list, what am I doing right now… what’s my level of hunger,  what should I eat… it’s  human nature to some degree.  Think of yourself for example… right now.  You may be driving or exercising or some other task.  Most podcasts are listened to while multitasking. But the Senator… in his delusion thinks that at some point in your day, your thinking of him.  That’s right.  You’re thinking of him and what a well rounded person he is.  Do you think that’s a preposterous notion?  I do.  My ego might think that someone is thinking harshly of me or kindly of me, but I have some common sense to snap out of that notion and realize: no one is thinking of me, nor should they.  That’s not low self esteem or high self esteem, it’s just a fact.  Most of us spend the majority of our day thinking about our self and we are doing, what we’ve done in the past or what we will be doing.  Human nature.  But the Senator thinks most people, at some point in the day, stop and marvel at what a well rounded person he is.  Like a very stable genius might.   We start talking about musicians and it turns into a circle jerk about all the concerts we’ve been to in our lives, truly disgusting.  Disgusting but relatively brief.   And we do mention a couple of documentaries that might be worth your time, especially if you like documentaries about musicians and the music industry.  Netflix has several and two of them are about music executives, Clive Davis and the other is about a guy named Clarence Avant whose career spans not only the music industry but film, television and politics as well.  It’s called “The Black Godfather”.   Again, we pick up the conversation with The Senator mentioning musicians that have passed away this year, af few of which include the great song writer John Prine, Charlie Pride, Hellen Reddy, Mac Davis, Charlie Daniels, Kenny Rogers, Little Richard, Bill Withers, jazz great Ellis Marsalis who is the father of 4 great jazz musicians including Wynton Marsalis and Branford Marsalis, the great drummer from Rush, Neal Peart and many others including as the senator mentions, Eddie Van Halen… Another music business based docu-series you might want to check out on Netflix is called “Song Exploder” in which they interview an artist and drill down into the elements of creating a particular song, from lyrics to sound design and production to the way it was received by listeners.  I don’t think this is a show you would necessarily watch every episode but that’s okay because each episode is a stand alone with a different artist in every episode.  I’ve only watched one so far and I thought it was really good.  The artist is Trent Reznor who doesn’t really fall smack dab into our demographic.  He was the frontman for a group in the early 90’s calle Nine Inch Nails.  What we would call Goth or a 90’s version of punk rock without the punk rock tempo.  You know, dark suicidal teen angst stuff.  Real wholesome stuff.  Every generation has it right?  Those teen years where no one understands you and you’re questioning why you were put on this planet and no one gets it.  You know, a good old ego trip.  I never outgrew mine.  As I said in the last episode, for me, it was Karen Carpenter and "Goodbye To Love".  I’ll put this song up against any teen angst in any generation… from the Who to The Sex Pistols to the Clash to… Nirvana!  I mean, they named their band Nirvana for Christ’s sake.  That’s a happy name!  I think Mr. Reznor would agree about the that Carpenters song.  And by the way, Trent Reznor was able to move past those feelings that many youths feel.  He’s won an academy award for best original score in the movie the Social Network.   Scraps: Island of Misfit Toys - Conan O’brien | YouTube  Carpenters Goodbye To Love - The Carpenters | YouTube      

Welcome to part two of the Modern Moron’s Holiday Special name that Christmas artist Extravaganzapalooza! Our first song is by Ertha Kitt, which the senator gets without even hearing her iconic song “Santa Baby” even being played.  Now, I have to down a rabbit hole before we even get to the episode. I mention in this episode that we could do a whole show on Ertha Kitt.  While in pop culture she is remembered for that song as well as playing Cat Woman in the last season of the Batman TV series, she had a very long and successful career on Broadway and other stages in the world as well as on screen and as a recording artist.  But she was also an activist, primarily speaking out against the war in Vietnam, racism and underprivileged youth’s.  In fact, she attended a luncheon at the whitehouse hosted by “Ladybird” Johnson in January of 1968 which derailed her career by perhaps a decade or more.  The luncheon was focused on crime and young people committing cirme… remember that.  Ertha was in attendance because of her advocacy for a group in Washington DC called “Rebels With a Cause”.   Ladybird Johnson welcomes everyone to the luncheon and at one point, President Lyndon Johnson comes in to applause and says a few words.  As LBJ, turns to leave, Ms. Kitt… who  is only a few feet away from him, stands up to ask the president a question.  Actual audio from that luncheon was apparently uncovered just this year by the LBJ Library in Austin, Texas.  The President was not going to take questions.  This is 1968 and he thought he’d just come by and say hello to the ladies having their cute little luncheon.  So here is the audio of Ertha Kitt asking President Johnson a question about delinquent parents… I believe that’s the phrase you’ll hear … delinquent parents who have to work and therefore cannot be there enough to parent completely.  It’s a little hard to hear, but LBJ responds and at the end I believe he says something to the effect of, “That’s a good question to ask yourself and the women here and ya’ll have a good luncheon… here’s the recording: So, LBJ walks away from on his last word.  No handshake, no smile, no nothin’... it looked like she pissed him off.  Purportedly she was shunned from that moment on at the luncheon, who knows.  But I did read a couple of sources that said the White House staff car that brought her to the White House for the luncheon was not available to take her back to her hotel and she had to take a cab.   Supposedly acting and singing gigs dried up for her after that incident and she ended up moving to Europe or at least spending a majority of her time there as she couldn't find work in the U. S.  It was later reported in 1976 in the NY Times that the CIA had opened a file on Ertha Kitt at the request of the Secret Service which produced an extensive report containing second‐hand gossip about the entertainer but no evidence of any foreign intelligence connections.  I have a link to that 1976 archived article at the bottom of the show description.  See all the fun stuff the Holiday’s bring?! Later in this episode the Senator and I have a wonderful Moron Moment when we discuss our mutual love for The Charlie Brown Christmas Special and the great Christmas music in that program from jazz musician Vince Guaraldi.  The Senator mentions a  song with no lyrics called “Skating”... it sounds like this… then he says the song doesn’t have anything to do with Christmas in the lyrics.  But we had just established that there were no lyrics in the song he’s trying to recall.  Typical morons trying to have an intelligent conversation… it just goes in circles, he ends up howling Hark The Herald Angels” like the end of the special.  and neither of us are listening to the other.  And we never… never identify the song the Senator was originally talking about because we’re basically having a contest to see who can name the most moments from the special … no listening going on whatsoever… You’ll see. It will definitely make you grateful… that you don’t have us drinking Egg Nog by your fireplace talking non-stop about all the crap we know about A Charlie Brown Christmas.  It’s The Modern Moron Christmas Holiday Special Extravaganzapalooza brought to you by Dolly Madison. CLOSE - Have you ever listened to two people talking without listening to each other more than that?  That was some serious two old men on a porch talk right there…  Regarding the Senator’s comment about CBS cancelling the Charlie Brown Christmas Special because of references to Christianity… I could not find a reasonably credible news source or multiple sources to confirm that.  What I did find on more than one site is that all of the Charlie Brown Holiday Specials for Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas were not on broadcast television this year because the rights are now owned by Apple TV. ($$)  You know what we should have done?  We should have done a show about Christmas Specials we watched when we were kids!  From Rudolph to Charlie Brown to one of my favorites, The Mr. Magoo Christmas Carol.  That Mr. Magoo was an incredible actor.  Ah maybe next year...  I always forget to ask you to please hit like, thumbs up, subscribe, leave a great review… or even a bad review for that matter, retweet, repost, and blah, blah, blah  Thank you for listening and if I don’t post another episode before Christmas I hope you have a great one.   Erhta Kitt vs. LBJ - Newly Found Audio - YouTube |  This Is The President  C.I.A. in ‘68 Gave Secret Service a Report Containing Gossip About Eartha Kitt After White House Incident (Published 1975) - NY Times Archive   Charlie Brown holiday specials will not air on TV for the first time in decades — they'll be on Apple TV+ - CBS News Charlie Brown holiday specials move to Apple TV+, ending long runs on CBS, ABC - Fox News  

Welcome to a Modern Moron Holiday Treat Classic Extravaganzapalooza.  In this episode and in this Holiday season of giving, the Senator returns!  And in that spirit of giving he denies any wrong doing in our breakup and even demands an apology.  Remind you of anyone? We really do try to make this episode about Christmas songs and the iconic vocalists who we immediately recognize.  But as I said, the Senator returns and we spend the majority of the episode bickering over the breakup that he didn’t even know existed because he was too busy We also go down a rabbit hole about hunting… specifically the use of alcohol while hunting.  Neither of us hunt so naturally we... or I know all about it.  I bring it up now because I have something to say about it at the end of the show as I did a little research about drinking and shooting.  Also, we only get to a couple of Christmas songs at the end so this is part one of the Modern Moron Holiday Treat Classic Extravaganzapalooza!  And thank you for listening. CLOSE Isn’t it great to have him back?  So much more material, it just grows and grows… like a blossoming algae or a fungus.   With all of his ranting about Burl Ives NOT being a folk artist, I have included the wikipedia link to his profile which starts:  Ives began as an itinerant (traveling) singer and banjoist, and launched his own radio show, The Wayfaring Stranger, which popularized traditional folk songs. In 1942, he appeared in Irving Berlin's This Is the Army, and then became a major star of CBS radio.  A popular film actor through the late 1940s and '50s, Ives's best-known film roles included parts in So Dear to My Heart (1948) and Cat on a Hot Tin Roof (1958), as well as Rufus Hannassey in The Big Country (1958), for which he won an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor. I also need to take a moment here… to give a special Christmas wish to the family of the Senator and all you go through… I’m going to amazon right now and I’m ordering several pairs of hip and chest waders… you know, the kind fisherman use so they can wade out into water without getting their clothes wet?  I’m getting some for you for all the bullshit you have to wade through in your home.  I imagine you already have some masks to wear with the pandemic, so I’ll just recommend you wear them in your own household so you filter out the bullshit generated by the fantasy world your husband and father lives in.  I’m looking some up right now… and I’m going to make sure they are bullshit retardant.  Uh oh…. Doesn’t look like they have one’s that are bullshit retardant.  Oh no, the  senator’s bullshit will melt those things off in a new york minute.  I’ll keep looking.   I also feel the need to address an issue I brought up in regards to alcohol and duck hunting.  As it turns out that can be a touchy subject so as an astute Moron I did a minimal amount of research on this, meaning I Google’d or in this case I used duck duck go… get it?  See what I did there?  Here are some responses I ran across on a hunting chat site with regard to consuming alcohol while hunting: https://www.duckhuntingchat.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=902088  If you drink and hunt(shoot) you are an IDIOT, an IMBECILE, a MORON!!!  Sounds like someone should be advertising on duck hunting sites!  https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110112091255AAnrxaG “I limit myself to 14 beers while hunting with a bow, 12 with a gun, and 24 while fishing....unless it is catfishing, then the sky's the limit!” “No drinking while hunting? What's become of this country? Next you're going to tell me you can't drink while fishing or drag racing.” While I’m fairly sure these two comments were meant to be humorous, and I’m all for the dark humor folks, but it also shows… perhaps…. That in some circles it’s not taken as seriously as in other circles.   https://www.adirondackexplorer.org/explorer_reports/ny-legislature-lowers-limit-for-hunting-while-intoxicated  ( March 27, 2019) “New York lawmakers have agreed to lower the threshold for hunting drunk, a misdemeanor, to the same blood alcohol limit for driving or boating while intoxicated.” From: https://unitedsportsmen.com/waiver/  “No alcohol permitted anywhere except on the USI Clubhouse patio, and only after shooters have completed their day’s shooting. Shooters having consumed alcohol will not be permitted to shoot again that day, no exceptions.” Burl Ives - Wikipedia  

Welcome to another Episode of the Modern Moron which I spend with my OP… my old radio partner down in Southern California.  We hit on the expected post Thanksgiving / Pandemic chat about how things have changed and how they are the same, and how our kids are doing with distance learning or hybrid learning and “special ed” learning all new terms to me in the past 6 months… and some of it has been for the better in terms of educating our children. We briefly discuss the effects of the recent Covid surge for which I will have a minor personal announcement about at the end of this episode… (stinger) no, it’s not that big of a deal. We do talk politics, after all we did have a presidential election last month, which leads to a discussion about the media and it’s coverage of the president which leads me to go on my “per-episode” soap box cry for the Netflix documentary “The Social Dilemma” and to my regular listeners… both of you… I apologize.  I’ll find something new and shiny very soon.  But my OP brings up Parler… that’s Parler with an “E”.  It’s an alternative social media site launched in 2018 and it has become a home and a platform for more conservative views.  This is what Wikipedia has to say: Parler is an American microblogging and social networking service launched in August 2018. Parler has a significant user base of Donald Trump supporters, conservatives, conspiracy theorists, and right-wing extremists.  Posts on the service often contain far-right content, antisemitism, and conspiracy theories like QAnon.  Journalists (which some of our listeners would replace journalists with Liberals or Lib-tards) have described Parler as an alternative to Twitter, and the service is popular among people who have been banned from mainstream social networks or oppose their moderation policies.  Parler markets itself as a "free speech" and unbiased alternative to mainstream social networks such as Twitter and Facebook. However, journalists and users have criticized the service for content policies that are more restrictive than the company portrays and sometimes more restrictive than those of its competitors.  Beginning in June 2020, some users reported being banned from Parler for espousing left-wing viewpoints. As of November 2020, the service had about 4 million active users and over 10 million total users.  To put that into some perspective Twitter has 330 million active users.  Facebook has 2.7 billion users worldwide with 223 Million in the U.S. But my OP makes a great observation that Parler is loosing steam because there isn’t quite enough diversity in opinions, Which also addresses a point brought to you in our last thrilling episode when I read you an article from the Atlantic titled “Reading Too Much Political News Is Bad for Your Well-Being” But even when people agree politically, expressing intense views, or going on and on about politics, harms relationships. A 2018 data analysis in the journal Political Opinion Quarterly revealed that “even strong partisans dislike too much political discussion—even agreeable discussion.” We wrap things up with a few streaming suggestions from the Show “Silicon Valley” on HBO to The Queen’s Gambit on Netflix to The Mandalorian on Disney which is in its second season.   It’s Season’s Greetings on the Modern Moron and thank you for listening…  CLOSE: Full disclosure… when I was getting this clip from the end of the movie “Rudy” and finding the section to use… this is at the end when Rudy get to dress with the starting football players and he gets to play at the end… this piece of music is called “Rudy’s Victory”... I was in front of my computer crying… full tears coming down the cheeks crying as I was watching the final scene from Rudy.  That movie gets me every time.  We need to do one full episode just on the movie “Rudy”.  In fact.. To show you guys the moronic rabbit holes I go down… there is a great interview of Sean Astin on the Dan Patrick show about shooting the film Rudy and the “creative license” that was taken to make that larger than life character and film.  I will include a link to that interview at the bottom of the description for you. Sean Astin "Rudy" interview - The Dan Patrick Show (2015) - YouTube  

Welcome to another episode of the laziest podcast in America.. Aka the Modern Moron.  I have lost all desire to meet a self imposed weekly deadline, I again do not have a guest and I plan on putting as little effort as possible into this episode.  In fact I’m basically going to read to you in this election week episode… or is it election month?  I’m going with election month, because we sure as hell are not going to have a consensus by the end of the day or the week and once a consensus is reached you can be equally sure that outcome will be contested. I said I’m going to read to you… not a bedtime story, although that would probably be a better bet.  I’m going to read you most of an article published in …. Should I say where it was published?  It will alienate some of you just by the source won’t it?  How about the author?  The author is Arthur C. Brooks is a contributing writer at The Atlantic, a professor of the practice of public leadership at the Harvard Kennedy School, a senior fellow at the Harvard Business School.  He is also the host of the podcast - great another podcast you should certainly listen to before this one - the podcast “The Art of Happiness With Arthur Brooks.”  Great.   The Article is titled, “Reading Too Much Political News Is Bad for Your Well-Being; Obsessing over politics could hurt your happiness and your relationships.  If got a couple of opinions to interject here and there, which is ironic because the entire problem this article focuses on is our extreme toxic attachment to our own opinions. Plus an homage to some of our past Presidents. Reading Too Much Political News Is Bad for Your Well-Being; Obsessing over politics could hurt your happiness and your relationships.  - The Atlantic    

Welcome Morons or rather followers of a moron.  I do have a real guest for this episode but I want to get to a couple of things first. First of all… this is the first episode since the passing of supreme supreme court justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg.  Relative to what there is to know about her, I don’t know much, but I do want to share with you two things about her and her passing that I found to be extraordinary, the first being President Trump’s initial reaction and response to her passing.  I’ve tried to share this with a couple of non Trump supporters and they immediately told me that not only did they not hear it, but that they had no desire to hear anything about Trump’s comments on someone with the integrity of Ruth Bader Ginsberg.  And I’ll bet all of you Libby McLiberson’s out there are all up in arms over Trump’s replacement being confirmed before the election and blah, blah blah… by the way Fox News, Yes Fox News has a story as of this recording and I’ll read you the headline:  “Majority of Americans think winner of presidential election should select Supreme Court nominee, poll finds” But now I’m already digressing… If you’re liberal or a democrat or any kind of a non-Trump supporter and have not heard his informal response, you should… and will because you’re about to hear it.  It was as he was leaving a rally and it might be a little difficult to hear because in the background and in all of it’s irony, you can mainly hear Elton John’s “Tiny Dancer” being played to the crowd that had assembled…. Did you hear that?  He almost sounded human!  There was a statement of reverence for the work of what has to be one of the greatest Americans and greatest supreme court justices in history.  You don’t have to like Trump and you can go on hating him, but if you are not willing to acknowledge that moment of even slight humility, then you are part of the problem.  I’ll say this many times from now on, but if you are not willing to sit and listen to someone who disagrees with you… and not tell them they’re wrong or convince them you’re right… if you can’t just sit, set your bullshit and your agenda down for a few minutes and listen… then how can you expect someone else to listen to you?  In that regard, you are part of the problem. Which leads me to the second profound and extraordinary aspect of Ruth Bader Ginsberg’s life was that her best pal on the supreme court, was someone on the opposite end of the spectrum politically and opposed to views of the law.  A person I found arrogant and pompous and that was Justice Antonin Scolea.  But there they were good friends.  Ginsberg spoke at his funeral… Why can’t we see some of that… any of that in the legislative branch of our government?  And if it does exist, why don’t we see it?  If it does exist, for the sake of argument, we don’t see or hear about it because negative news SELLS.  It attracts eyeballs and ears and that means more advertising dollars for the bogus news sources from CNN to Fox and that takes us to our guest and more on the Netflix documentary “The Social Dilemma”... God DAMMIT what a brilliant segue! My guest is a professional computer geek and I would go so far as to say he is like a supreme court justice of computers.  His name is Paul Congdon… actually Dr. Paul Congdon because he has his doctorate in some form of computerology from one of the esteemed Universities of California where he was also a professor.  He worked for Hewlette Packard for many, many years both in the united states and abroad.  How do I know someone so intelligent?  I went to high school with him of course.   I get his take on The Social Dilemma along with a few short clips from the documentary and some other stuff… it’s Commentary from computer nerds about other Computer Nerds on Netflix on… The Modern Moron... CLOSE - Dr. Congdon had a great point that I want to reiterate and that was “The tools Social Media and News Media companies are using to target you can also be used to vet out the story lines of the news you read.”  Do you want that?  You should.  Do you want to know that CNN is tainting their headlines with inflammatory jargon?  Do  you want to know that Fox is doing the same thing.  Or are you fine strapping on the news feedbag and living in the “Willful Ignorance” that we are stuck in? Also, from a regular segment we’re starting called “Trumperceptions”, which is a way to learn to accept this person by understanding a little about this Magnificent Moron and what makes him tick, or have ticks if you wish. This is from Gwenda Blair, Author of the book “The Trumps: Three Generations of Builders and a President”.  She is also a lecturer at Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism.  In her book she draws an extremely interesting connection between Donald Trump and author-slash-minister Norman Vincent Peale.  Does that name sound familiar?  If you’re over 55 it should as he wrote one of the most famous self-help books of all time, before there was even the term self-help books.  Remember “The Power of Positive Thinking”?  Yeah, he wrote that book in 1952 and he was also a minister for 52 years at The Marble Collegiate Church in Manhattan, one of the oldest protestant churches in America dating back to 1628.  Guess where the Trump family attended church?  That’s right... at the home of the Power of Positive thinking.  Trump was married there on his first wedding and both of his parent’s funerals were at that church.  Here is  Author Gwenda Blair on this subject courtesy of Business Insider magazine… (clip) Knowing this isn’t supposed to make you like Trump, but it should help you understand why he behaves the way he behaves and that should hopefully calm you down a bit over this whole nonsense.  If it doesn’t, maybe YOU have some work to do as opposed to everyone else? Finally, the first presidential debate was this week and I had the incredible good fortune to NOT watch it.  I will say this, the debate and every presidential debate for the last 20 years could have easily been reigned in by using the correct types of microphones and simply turning them off when either idiot reaches their time limit.  There is a clock counting down the seconds they have left and if they go over American can watch them move their mouth and say nothing, which is probably what they were doing for the first two minutes they were trying to speak. So why don’t we do that?  So simple, such common sense.  So why don’t we do that?  Because the news industry wants you to hear Trump tell Grandpa Joe he’s a senile old man.  The News Corporations want you to hear Biden tell Trump to shut up.  That makes for more eyes and ears for longer periods of time on their Network, their Newspaper, their website or their app… and that means you’re looking at their advertisements just like Dr. Congdon was saying as well as the other industry experts on The Social Dilemma Documentary.  It is a dilemma and we really need to educate ourselves.  Thank you again to my guest, watch that goddamn documentary, click subscribe, and like and all that b.s. so I can get an advertiser and sell out like everyone else.  Majority of Americans think winner of presidential election should select Supreme Court nominee, poll finds - Fox News The Trumps' family church explains everything you need to know about Donald - Business Insider | YouTube  The power of Trump's positive thinking – POLITICO    

Welcome to another episode of The Modern Moron!  I have a very, VERY special guest lined up for you in this edition.  Someone I’ve known my entire life, we’ve been through a lot together.  My guest is… me.  Sorry, I couldn’t get someone lined up for this week.  Whatever.  Don’t judge me. Okay, we’re going to start off light and breezy and work towards dead serious.  In my return to this podcast, not that anyone noticed I left… a few of you did though and thank you… but I would really rather not discuss politics anymore.  Unfortunately that has become extremely difficult, so rather than treat politics as taboo, I’m going to try… TRY to just be curious about it.  I got into a huge argument with the Senator over this… the Senator being my most regular guest on this program.  I’m sure I’m not alone in saying friendships have been lost and certainly changed over the political climate both in this country and globally.   We’ve lost the ability to listen to an opinion other than our own, process it and come to an informed state of mind that is not completely RED or completely BLUE or BLACK or WHITE or RAINBOW.  It doesn’t have to be all one color.  Please see an article I will post at the end of the description from the L.A. Times titled “The Decline and Fall of Nuance”.  Sadly, some of you may not do so simply because the L.A. Times represents something that has ZERO value to you.  All information should have some value.  Take all the information… turn it into knowledge… and then maybe we can apply it in the world with some wisdom and compassion.  See what I did there?  I’m so fucking Zen I can’t believe it. By the way in that article, the author recalls seeing a woman at a Black Lives Matter protest with a sign that read, “Not all blacks are criminals.  Not all whites are racists.  Not all cops are bad.  Ignorance comes in all colors.”  How great would it be if we had a march or a sit-in with that as the central message. Documentary recommendation… : The Biggest little farm on Hulu.    The husband is a wildlife camera operator…. The wife is a personal chef, with a focus on healthy wholesome food.  The husband, I believe was covering a property owner who had literally hundreds of animals, mainly cats and dogs, she was sheltering on her property.  It was a public health issue and they had to gather all of these animals that were in some horrible living conditions. The couple adopted one of the dogs from this situation.  They truly rescued it.  While they were at work the dog barked constantly to the point they got evicted.  So they went for their dream of having a farm so they could keep the dog, whose life they had saved.   Very interesting how becoming farmers doesn’t always mean growing and nurturing all life.  They have chickens.  The chickens lay eggs.  The eggs provide one of their main sources of income… until the coyotes start slaughtering the chickens.  They tried everything to deter the coyotes until they had killed literally hundreds of chickens.  Tried everything except shooting the coyotes. So finally the farmer felt like he was left with no choice.  He grabbed the shotgun and killed one of the coyotes.  Cross fade from the image of the dead coyote to the image of the dog whom they rescued from being killed… his name was Ross.  And it was a great poignant moment where they guy admitted there was some hypocrisy involved.  He had raised some baby pigs, became attached to them and then had to sell them off to market.  He had to put down sheep in the pasture that had become so injured that nothing could be done other than to kill the poor animal.   You may say, eat a plant based diet and there won’t be that problem.  Well there were plenty of problems with other critters, specifically insects and snails specifically that were destroying their crops. We have become sooooo unbelievably spoiled when we walk into our grocery stores and can pick up a styrofoam package with any kind of meat or seafood we want practically.  And we take it for granted, at least I do.  We loose perspective, at least i do.  Multiple times a day, I lose perspective and get pissed or disgusted that my problems are not going away immediately, forgetting that the quality of my problems are luxuries compared to a vast number of people. My first colonoscopy - Human jet ski and the water coming out of my ass was astounding.  Despite the discomfort of drinking a gallon of that swill there was something good about being cleaned out from head to ass.  I literally had nothing in me.  Starting fresh… what was going to be the first thing I put in my body after it being completely clean as a whistle. I know this is gross to some, but it shouldn’t be gross to this demographic.  Even to my gals out there who listen and at one point in  your life you were like, “ew, this guy’s gross with all the diarrhea talk and colonoscopy-isms.  But when you hit our demographic?  Sorry for the pun, but “shit gets real”.   What was I talking about? My colonoscopy prep and that wonderful experience, that’s what I was talking about.  If they’re going to send you a gallon of that stuff to drink knowing that your going to become a human water turbine, they might as well send some jumper cables as well so we can generate some electricity from all that naturally created water pressure.   Another reason why we can talk about this - I can talk about this to you, is because it’s just you and me right now, right?  Probably anyway… if you are one of the rare few, let’s use the word privileged.  It’s just you and me… no audience is listening to this in a group.  Just me and you… nothing to be embarrassed or uncomfortable about, right? Once I was in and wearing a fabulous gown that doesn’t tie in the back because they don’t want you to tie it in the back, I got my sedagive, and I was out like a light, didn’t wake up until the recovery room/ group patient farting chamber and I was done.  The prep was the worst part. Next Item... DOCUMENTARY ASSIGNMENT - “The Social Dilemma” on Netflix I haven’t been this adamant about a documentary you need to watch since ‘The Great Hack’ and if you still haven’t watched that documentary about what happened during the 2016 election, sorry to say this but shame on you.  Do you want it to happen again?  Do you enjoy burying your head in the sand?  Strike that… burying your head in the sand does have it’s appeal in the short term.  You have got to watch the Great Hack on Netflix and when you’re finished with that as uncomfortable and inconvenient as it may be, you absolutely have to watch The Social Dilemma.  Don’t watch both in the same day though, that would overload your circuits. For now, here are some of the people interviewed at length for this documentary: First up is Tristan Harris Wikipedia Page Biography - raised in the San Francisco Bay Area by a single mother. Later on, he studied computer science at Stanford University while interning at Apple Inc., then embarked on a master's degree at Stanford, where he joined a company called Persuasive Technology Lab. Harris studied the psychology of behavior change.  Tristan was classmates with one of Instagram’s founders, Kevin Systrom, and helped create a demo app with the other founder, Mike Krieger. In 2007, Harris dropped out of the master's program at Stanford.  He launched a startup called Apture, which was focused on bringing instantaneous search to content on the web.  Google acquired Harris’ company Apture in 2011 and he ended up working on Google Inbox.  His Opinions on technology use - While working at Google in 2013, Harris sent around a presentation to a handful of coworkers which was titled “A Call to Minimize Distraction & Respect Users’ Attention”. In that presentation, Harris suggested that Google, Apple and Facebook should “feel an enormous responsibility” to make sure humanity doesn't spend its days buried in a smartphone.  The 141-slide deck was eventually viewed by tens of thousands of Google employees and sparked conversations about the company's responsibilities long after he left the company.  IN his presentation he discussed five human vulnerabilities:   Bad forecasting - The first vulnerability highlighted by Harris was ″bad forecasting,” where alert messages don’t clearly explain what the user is about to give up in terms of their attention. For instance, Facebook might show a notification that you were tagged in a photo. While this alert might suggest you’d quickly “see a photo,” you’re probably going to actually spend 10 minutes on Facebook.    “Intermittent variable rewards” - This is the idea that users keep performing an action in hopes of getting a possible but unlikely reward. Harris called this type of behavior the “most addictive and hardest to stop,” just like playing slot machines in casinos. His example: constantly refreshing an app like Twitter or Facebook to see new content from friends. “We spend lots of time -- are we getting the same value back?” he asks, before suggesting that Silicon Valley should design “to minimize the presence of intermittent variable rewards and reduce addictions.” “Loss-aversion” or the “fear of missing out” or FOMO as the kids call it.Because we’re constantly afraid of missing an alert -- like a major event (and what are we calling a major event these days?  When was the last time a Kardashian wiped their ass? -- we are continuously checking our phones as if running on a treadmill, Harris said. He suggested designers should “design to give users confidence that they can disconnect more often and not miss something important.” Fast and slow thinking - Harris suggested that creating tech that’s too frictionless takes away our human ability to “consider before acting.” Our phones buzz, so we take them out of our pockets without even thinking about it, for example. Harris suggested designers should “leave enough friction for users to pause and consider” their actions.   Stress and altered States - Here, Harris warned that certain actions we take with tech products force us out of a healthy state of mind. For instance, Harris said, we stop breathing while we check our email and that our sympathetic nervous system is activated, our liver dumps glucose and cholesterol into our blood and our heart rates increase “preparing us for a fight or flight response.” He said designers should instead design apps to minimize stress and calm people. Yes, designers should.  The companies they work for should.  But that’s not why companies are in business.  When does the ethical behavior of a company become more important that profits?  OR as most companies would say although maybe off the record, when should the consumer take responsibility for what they buy?  You would probably get a different answer from different companies.  Whole foods might give you a different “off the record” answer than say, Monsanto or Exxon/Mobile.  Should there be any regulation to protect us Morons from ourselves or is it Mike Brady again with the Caveat Emptor.  Remember I hauled that one out in Episode 38!  Titled: “Facebook & Free Speech, I'm with Mark Zuckerberg, Caveat Emptor & The Brady Bunch, Pixar's Wall-E & Costco Chickens. How about that?  We were talking about Facebook again. Wasn’t that a fun trip down memory lane?  Okay, I wanna wrap this up because there is so much more to talk about relating to this documentary.  I will end with this clip from Tristan Harris where he talks about computers and the software or apps that we use and how they were tools.  He compares that tool like any carpenter’s tool and how the apps we use today are very different types of tools… MANIPULATION BASED ENVIRONMENTS - that’s what most of our social networking apps are on our smartphones that we have with us 24/7.  And I’m sure you realize all your favorite flavors of News are all on social media as well, vying for your eyeballs. Once again that was Tristan Harris who is a design ethicist with a non-profit organization he founded called “Time Well Spent”.  The documentary is called “The Social Dilemma”, it’s on Netflix and it is a must watch.  Think of it like taxes or picking up your dog’s poop when you take them for a walk.  It’s gross but you gotta do it.  We’ll definitely talk more about this.  Until next time… Sources: Op-Ed: America has a terrible case of the screaming memes - Los Angeles Times (mediabiasfactcheck.com: Left-Center Biased based on editorial positions that favor the left and High for factual reporting due to a clean fact check record) Google’s new focus on well-being started five years ago with this presentation - The Verge (Techpublication skewed left-center as opposed to far left) Google employee warned in 2013 about five psychological vulnerabilities that could be used to hook users - MSNBC (moderately to strongly biased liberal.  MIXED on factual reporting) "The Social Dilemma:" Lies Spread 6x Faster Than Truth on Social Media | Amanpour and Company - PBS | Amanpour and Company | YouTube

Welcome to the Modern Moron!  Where I finish catching up with my friend Mike Schwartz.  We reminisce about old comedians still around like Mel Brooks and other comics who have passed away, specifically Fred Willard.  I don’t know about you but I have sort of a bucket list of musicians I want to see while they’re still performing and Mike and I have that same sentimentality with some of the comedians we idolized when we were young… when we were young… Jesus do I sound old enough right now? Also, Mike was a bit thrown by my use of sound effects in the  first episode.  Now, you know i love my sound effects… but for this episode… I promise not to use any sound effects… right after this one…. See?  Okay I lied.  But there won’t be any in the actual interview. We go down a number of rabbit holes talking about films we love and directors who act in other director’s films and we talk about Werner Herzog… don’t act like you don’t know who that is.  He has a thick accent and people love to put him in their shows… from Parks and Recreation to The Mandelorian… you’ll see.    Mike starts out by trying to tell me about the family of his favorite comedian Albert Brooks, who’s family’s real last name is Einstein.  Naturally I get confused, not because of the obvious reference to Albert Einstein the genius physicist, but because I get confused, naturally… It’s a couple of getting older guys reminiscing on a front porch on The Modern Moron.  Thank you for listening! 1987 Broadcast News: Aaron Loves Jane - YouTube  

Welcome Back? To an episode of the modern moron!  It feels strange to say that after saying it once a week for about a year and a half.  I stopped doing this podcast in March and, I can’t remember why… did something happen around March that I’m missing?  Actually I did have a reason to stop doing this program and I will get into that another time.  Because my guest on this episode is an old and very dear friend from, you guessed it, my days in Los Angeles chasing the elusive career in the entertainment business. The friend I speak of is Mike Schwartz.  Mike was a senior classman at the the Groundling’s Theater school and it’s Sunday company when I came in as a freshman.  Mike went on to become a writer and producer for the very successful show Scrubs and for those of you who are big fans of Scrubs, Mike also played the character Lloyd.  Lloyd, if you remember was a recurring character who was an EMT, a delivery guy, and also a patient at the hospital.  There’s even a wiki page for Lloyd and I will put the link to that at the bottom of the description. But a big break for Mike came long before that and I got to be around him when it happened. I ask Mike about Billy Crystal.  Mike had the good fortune to be the writer’s assistant for Billy Crystal’s staff during some of the years he hosted the Academy Awards - specifically ‘97 and ‘98 when the best picture films were The English Patient and Titanic. Now if you’re nestled right into our demographic you remember what a great job Crystal did as he’s hosted the Oscars 9 times, second only to Bob Hope who hosted for a total of 19 Academy Award programs.  Billy won 2 Primetime Emmy awards.  If you’ll remember, Billy was known for opening the show with a montage of scenes from nominated films that were put together where he would show up in each scene and then he did a musical number mentioning all of the nominees as well.   Mike was the writer’s assistant for those broadcasts and he tells a great story or two about being backstage at the Oscars, because they would write jokes on the fly as events happened during the telecast.  He has a particular memory he shares for I believe the 1998 Academy Awards which was it’s 70th Anniversary.   Side note, one of Mike’s comedy idols was and is Albert Brooks who has done so many great films you know him from... like Broadcast News, Modern Romance and Lost in America both of which he wrote, and of course the voice of Marlin in Finding Nemo… SO, Mike does a great Albert Brooks impression and Billy Crystal knows and loves Albert as well, so that was sort of the gateway of establishing a special place in Billy Crystal’s heart.   Mike also tells a story about comedian Richard Lewis who was speaking at a reception following a funeral for a mutual acquaintance that involves Billy Crystal as well. There, is that enough context for you?  Now it’s like you and Mike are good friends with an unspoken bond.  Good.  Now I’m stealing Mike’s Albert Brooks impersonation. We begin the call with Mike revealing to me that he just finished a therapy session and I immediately try to delve into his therapy with complete abandon and intrusiveness.  Not a very polite thing for a host to do, but we’ll see what happens.  It’s my friend Mike Schwartz on the Modern Moron and as always, thank you for listening… Scrubs Fan Page - Lloyd Slawski   Billy Crystal 70th Annual Academy Awards - YouTube  Olivia de Havilland presenting the 75th Past Oscar Winner Reunion - YouTube

Welcome again to TMM… you know since there is so much love and unity in this country right now, both socially and politically, I think we’ll take a break from politics and news headlines.  Don’t worry… all of the toxic chaotic issues going on will be right there and waiting for you in less than half an hour… I promise.  They will not go away. I should never have waited a month to get to this interview with writer, performer, producer  Larry Dorf.  He has spent the recent past working on a very popular show on The Cartoon Networks Adult Swim called Mike Tyson Mysteries.  If you don’t know about this show, shame on you.  But you’re also in my 50 plus demographic so it’s to be expected.  You have to know about former heavyweight champion Mike Tyson even if you don’t follow sports. But back to Mike Tyson Mysteries… I’m sure you know about the Scooby Doo franchise… in fact we had the recent voice of Shaggy, Will Forte on the show a few weeks ago.  Imagine taking the concept of the Scooby Doo Mystery Machine… you know, the van?  Only instead of putting “mystery machine” on the side of the van you put Mike Tyson’s iconic face tattoo.  Instead of velma, you have Mike Tyson’s 15 year old adopted Korean daughter for which you create zero justification or backstory as to how he adopted a 15 year old Korean daughter.  Throw in an effeminate ghost who happens to dress in Dickensian wardrobe, add a sexist, womanizing, alcoholic pigeon voiced by Norm Macdonald and you have “Mike Tyson Mysteries.”  It’s a very funny and obviously odd show and you should check it out. We talk to Larry about writing on the show with his two partners Rachel Ramras and Hugh Davidson… who I’m pretty sure I can get on this prestigious podcast at some point.  We talk to Larry about how life has been for him and his family during the pandemic quarantine… or are we calling it a PLAN-demic now?  Isn’t that an adorable name?  I think so too!  We also talk about a trip Larry took with his associates to Comic Con one year in San Diego.  And if you just said to yourself “Comica… what?  What did he say?”  It’s Comic Con short for Comic Book Convention which includes all types of Animation… you know, for nerds and dorks.  Actually nerds and dorks like me.  By the way if you’ve never been to a comic book convention, you are missing out on some WONDERFUL people watching.  And by people watching I mean staring at freaks, nerds and geeks.  I mean they WANT you to stare at them.  It’s okay, go ahead.  I’m sure there’s one near you and you must put it on your bucket list.  It’s better than the freak show at the county fair, yet oddly similar. We start our conversation reminiscing about our performing days at the Groundlings Theater in Los Angles.  Larry liked to put up autographed head-shots of himself in the dressing area and I remind him of that… It’s an animated visit with Larry Dorf and a GREAT Mike Tyson Comic con story on TMM thanks for listening.    

Welcome to another episode of TMM… A sort of multi-episode portion on spin doctors, “Analysts”, talking heads and Conspiracy theorists.  How they’re different and how they’re basically the same only some wear fancy suits, have hair and makeup and have a cable news show, while others are conspiracy theorist’s that get banned from social media from the idiot Alex Jones all the way to the Conspiracy Theorist in Chief on Pennsylvania Avenue.  He’s run his first campaign on Conspiracies and he’s running his re-election on it.  And let’s agree for this moronic program that some… SOME conspiracies are true.  Most are probably not.. But there is a whole spectrum of conspiracies that have partial truths to them and those truths are used to build the narrative that the snake oil salesmen and women want you to believe.  Some are really, really good salespeople, like the folks on CNN and FOX and some are not so good or are even down right terrible… and deciding which salesperson you want to believe is as subjective as deciding which comedian is funny or which artist is worthy of the highest praise.  For example, Is it irony that some of Jackson Pollack’s most famous paintings are also used to refer to cases of diarrhea?  Interesting. We talk more about Alex Jones, a guy who’s made his living on conspiracy theories and who is a community college drop out.   We talk about Rush Limbaugh… another college dropout after two semesters from Missouri State.  Directly from his Wikipedia page, take that for what it’s worth:  According to his mother, "he flunked everything [...] he just didn't seem interested in anything except radio."  Biographer Zev Chafets believes that a large part of Limbaugh's life has been dedicated to gaining his father's respect and approval. Does that remind you of anyone? Sean Hannity gets mentioned at one point.  He is a political commentator on Fox News and has attended New York University, UC Santa Barbara, and Adelphi University, but did not graduate.  Darn it… but we are getting closer to a conservative pundit that does have a college degree.  There are plenty I assure you.   For some moronic reason I sent the Senator Part of my opening for this episode and in it I include a list of people who have pretty large platforms to spout their opinions.  I guess the questions is, when do opinions and the people selling them turn into something more…  apparently the Senator thinks I’m being a bit harsh?  Let’s find out as we drop in on a conversation between two Morons... CLOSE: We really bagged on a lot of people in our, or my, self righteous indignation and I’m sure they will all lose a lot of sleep over it, but I do want to point something out about some of the personalities we’ve bagged on over the past couple of episodes… I bagged on Alex Jones… community college drop out after about a semester.  I bagged on Rush Limbaugh, college dropout.  Sean Hannity who we did not talk about but is a prominent figure of Fox… no college degree.  And myself with the most advanced education among us three idiots with a bachelor’s degree in business administration on the five -year-program. And then there’s Rachel Maddow… she is not a college dropout.  She attended a community college called Stanford University.  And got a doctorate degree in political science from Oxford University so… whatever Rachel… whatever…. Yes, the ultimate comeback. Who else… Nancy Pelosi, the queen of passive aggressive nastiness with a scalpel… because she’s good at it.  But it’s still passive aggressive and it’s definitely not “holy” as she purports to strive for.  And at the same time, can you imagine having to deal with Trump unless you’re an absolute yes man or yes person?  If you don’t kiss his ass and agree with every word that dribbles from his mouth you end up in a juvenile name calling like you’re on a playground and you’re labeled mentally ill or you have mental problems.  Jeff Sessions, who I couldn’t stand in the first place and seemed to be showering with Trump is now “mentally unqualified.” Doesn’t that make Trump mentally unqualified since he’s the one who appointed Sessions? Please Don’t Eat Your Neighbor: Why What Alex Jones Just Said Is So Dangerous - Forbes.com 

We cover a lot of ground in these next three episodes, with a very general theme of Propaganda, fake news, gossip and conspiracy theories.  The lines get greyer and greyer on where news becomes gossip becomes propaganda becomes conspiracy… but they’re all big business and they’re all vying for your eyes and ears.  We talk about the rewards of bad behavior.  It just occurred to me that maybe the difference between a personality spinning the news and a personality perpetuating conspiracy theories is a suit, a tie and a three letter Network behind you?  Possible?  Nah… if you’re wearing a suit you must be credible right? At one point… The Senator commands me to look up some politician for him as if I’m his personal assistant and I have to remind him that he is actually sitting in front of a computer and is capable of doing his own research.  THEN… We have two separate conversations about two separate republican candidates to run as Joe Biden's VP candidate and naturally neither of us is listening to the other.  Nice work fellas, just like they do on the Political TV shows. The Senator gives us a history lesson on the foundations of the Democratic and Republican parties, President Lyndon Johnson and the signing of the Civil Rights Act and the contribution of Gerrymandering on our polarized political parties.  All through the eyes of a couple of morons.  So don’t expect even a sliver of factual accuracy. The recording you’re about to hear is at the end of an almost hour long recording session.  We were wrapping up and I hit record one more time “just in case” so… If you’ve been listening to this Podcast for a while you’ve probably heard me refer to addiction issues… my latest addiction is varied combinations of chocolate and caramel or any mix of sugar with some more sugar mixed in.  I’ve had issues with other “substances” and I admit to not being very diligent with a twelve step program I have been a part of for a number of years.  Listen as the Senator makes even my addiction issues all about him.  It’s classic Senator on the Modern Moron…  CLOSE: I couldn’t even make a straight faced response to that… oh well, I’m not a very good actor.  BUT I’m telling you if Joe Biden had this moron advising him… and why wouldn’t he?  I’m one of the smartest moron’s I know… I would tell him to make it public that he is considering a republican for his running mate and talk to a couple of them.  Doesn’t mean he has to pick one.  But to make it public creates the perception that he’s looking to reach across the isle.  I think it would be great to actually do it, but to just announce it to shake things up?... I think its a win win.  Hope you found something in that episode entertaining or informative… in the next two episodes we’ll continue to talk more about conspiracy theorists and their platforms, mostly podcasts, and how they are on the spectrum that starts with hopefully reporting the news, then spinning the news which isn’t nearly as bad as spreading propaganda about a subject or a person and then to conspiracy theories: how wild the conspiracy versus how well a particular individual or group can sell the conspiracy.