Podcasts about right not

In this profound episode of the Soul Seekers Podcast, we delve into the heart of hunting as a fundamental human ... Read more The post Ep. 268 | Unapologetically Speaking the Truth About Hunting & Why It's a Right Not a Privilege w/ Johnny Mack and Jeff Winslow appeared first on Soul Seekers.

Joeita speaks with Beth Beattie and Carole Dagher about their new book “The Right Not to Remain Silent: The Truth About Mental Health in the Legal Profession” which discusses mental health and well-being amongst legal professionals. HighlightsMental Health Within the Legal Profession – Opening Remarks (00:00)Introducing Beth Beattie & Carole Dagher (01:29)“The Right Not to Remain Silent: The Truth About Mental Health in the Legal Profession” (03:12)Importance of Mental Health Amongst Legal Professionals (04:23)Fear & Secrecy Surrounding Mental Health Struggles (06:02)Contributors to “The Right Not to Remain Silent” & Mental Health Summit (08:31)What Can We Learn from Personal Essays on Mental Health? (12:27)Intersections of Mental Health, Sexism, Homophobia & Racism (15:56)Deciding to Disclose One's Invisible Disability (19:31)Reducing Stigma & Changing the Culture Within the Legal Profession (22:24)Significance of Mental Health Awareness Amongst Legal Professionals (24:22)Closing Remarks (25:23)More Info: The Right Not to Remain Silent: The Truth About Mental Health in The Legal Profession is a groundbreaking book that sets the stage for revolutionizing how mental health is perceived in the legal profession and beyond. It contains a series of candid and courageous memoirs by members of the legal profession living with mental health and addiction issues. The authors are judges, lawyers, and law professors with wide-ranging legal practices in British Columbia, Alberta and Ontario including at Bay Street and small boutique firms.Young lawyers and senior members of the profession share their experiences of working while living with various types of challenges – depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, eating disorders, addiction, grief, imposter syndrome, and perfectionism.The Right Not to Remain Silent: The Truth About Mental Health in The Legal Profession addresses the insidious nature of mental health stigma and isolation in the legal community. But it is fundamentally a book about hope. As the authors discuss their sometimes harrowing journeys, they also show routes back to meaningful engagement with colleagues and work.To read these personal accounts is to be moved, inspired, and hopefully galvanized into action at the individual, collegial, and organizational level. This book offers practical solutions to change the culture of legal practice and beyond so as to bust apart stigma and isolation, foster people getting the support they need, and cultivate more diverse workplaces.Book ContributorsDavid S. GoldbloomThe Honourable George R. StrathyThe Honourable Michele HollinsBeth BeattieCarole DagherThomas TelferKatherine CooliganOrlando Da SilvaMichael R. FergusonMichael HermanAidan JohnsonImran KamalRyan MiddletonYadesha SatheaswaranLeslie Anne St. AmourDan SteinCourtney WilsonLeena YousefiBrett D.M. JonesShayan ImranM. Ishrat Husain“Postpartum depression made me feel hopeless. Not Today.” article by Carole Dagher for the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) Guest Bio: Beth BeattieCalled to the Bar in 1994, Beth Beattie has a broad-based health law litigation practice.Since January 2018 Beth has been a Friend of the Bell Let's Talk campaign. Her story of working as a lawyer with bipolar disorder has been featured on television, radio, podcasts, print media and even billboards across the country. Television appearances include The Marilyn Denis Show, CTV News, CTV North News, CP24 and a CTV prime time special, “In Their Own Words”.In 2021, 2022 and 2023 Beth co-chaired with the former Treasurer of the Law Society of Ontario, Teresa Donnelly, Mental Health Summits for Legal Professionals. Each year the Summits were watched by nearly 6,000 registrants.Beth is a founding member of Voices for Mental Health which is a group of employees at the Ontario Ministry of the Attorney General who have lived mental health experience or who have cared for loved ones with lived experience. Voices provides programming within the Ministry of the Attorney General and beyond on topics relating to mental health.In 2022 Beth was awarded the Law Society Medal, the highest honour available to a lawyer in Ontario. The Medal was awarded for outstanding service within the profession in accordance with the highest ideals of the profession. She was also awarded the Ontario Psychiatric Association's Mental Health Advocate of the Year Award. About The PulseOn The Pulse, host Joeita Gupta brings us closer to issues impacting the disability community across Canada.Joeita Gupta has nurtured a life-long dream to work in radio! She's blind, moved to Toronto in 2004 and got her start in radio at CKLN, 88.1 FM in Toronto. A former co-host of AMI-audio's Live from Studio 5, Joeita also works full-time at a nonprofit in Toronto, specializing in housing/tenant rights. Find Joeita on X / Twitter: https://twitter.com/JoeitaGupta The Pulse airs weekly on AMI-audio. For more information, visit https://www.ami.ca/ThePulse/ About AMIAMI is a not-for-profit media company that entertains, informs and empowers Canadians who are blind or partially sighted. Operating three broadcast services, AMI-tv and AMI-audio in English and AMI-télé in French, AMI's vision is to establish and support a voice for Canadians with disabilities, representing their interests, concerns and values through inclusion, representation, accessible media, reflection, representation and portrayal. Learn more at AMI.caConnect on Twitter @AccessibleMediaOn Instagram @accessiblemediaincOn Facebook at @AccessibleMediaIncOn TikTok @accessiblemediaincEmail feedback@ami.ca

Gun-related deaths are already over 17,000 as of May of this year. In 2021, they were at their highest ever at almost 50,000 murders, suicides, and accidental deaths involving firearms. These statistics are personal to me due to my experiences in the Moonies cult with the Rod of Iron Ministries, Kahr Arms, the AR15 factory, and two compounds (TN and TX) training people for civil war. I spoke with expert Jonathan Lowy who told me he successfully sued Kahr Arms. Jonathan founded Global Action on Gun Violence, a nonprofit working with the international community to stop gun trafficking and violence through litigation, human rights, and other strategies. He has been litigating and advocating against gun violence for over 25 years. He helped win over $100 million for victims in verdicts and settlements, created the precedent that holds gun companies accountable and reformed dangerous gun industry practices. His articles include “The Right Not to Be Shot.” He has been named one of the 500 leading lawyers in America for over ten years by Lawdragon magazine. Learn more about Steven Hassan and Freedom of Mind Resource Center. Visit freedomofmind.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Territorial Director Renewals The General Director of the Consecrated Women of Regnum Christi, Nancy Nohrden, has renewed Kate O'Connor in Brazil, Kathleen Murphy in North America and Betty Rivera in Spain as territorial directors for another three-year term. We thank them for their leadership and service in these territories. 6:29 Lenten Resolutions to Make the Most of Your Day With every hour of our days packed with activity, at work and at home, and while there doesn't appear to be a minute to spare in our schedule, we still find that the little time we do have is being wasted. In the latest RC Live blog post, Holly Gustafson suggests some resolutions for Lent this year to make the most of the little time we do have. 13:07 The Right Not to Know Above all else, watch over your heart, for it is the wellspring of life (Proverbs 4:23). RC Spirituality's Weekly Message, written by Fr. John Pietropaoli, LC, focuses on what corrosive information can we eliminate this Lent.

This week, Quinta and Scott co-hosted sans Alan, but were joined by the co-hosts of the Carnegie Council's The Doorstep Podcast, Nikolas Gvosdev and Tatiania Serafin! They talked through the week's big national security news, including:“Paper Rocks Censors.” China has erupted in protests against Xi Jinping's draconian zero-COVID policies, with thousands of Chinese citizens holding up a blank white sheet of paper as a sign of their discontent. Will these “white paper” protests make a difference in China? How should the United States respond?“A Cheney Might Shoot You in the Face, But They'd Never Stab You in the Back.” Last week, the Washington Post reported that more than a dozen current and past staffers on the Jan. 6 committee are angry with co-chair Liz Cheney for decisions to focus the committee's final report on conduct related to former President Trump. Is there merit to these complaints or do they seem overblown?“Much Guaido About Nothing?” The Biden administration is easing sanctions on Venezuela, as talks loom between the incumbent Maduro regime and recognized government-in-exile of opposition leader Juan Guaido. Does this signal a major shift in U.S. policy towards Venezuela? Or are those condemning the move overblowing the situation?As for object lessons, Quinta engaged in a bit of self-promotion over her recent Atlantic piece on the forthcoming Supreme Court case Moore v. Harper. Scott indulged in a Werner Herzog impression to recommend a new documentary directed by his son, "Last Exit: Space." Nikolas urged listeners to check out a recent interview with former German Chancellor Angela Merkel on her legacy and the current state of affairs in Europe. And Tatiana poured one out for free speech and passed along a recent article in New York Magazine, "Do You Have a Right Not to be Lied To?" Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As of October 6, 2022, all health care organizations in the United States are legally required to give patients unrestricted access to all their health records in a digital format. Micky Tripathi, Ph.D., National Coordinator for Health IT at the U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services, is excited about this change and its ability to empower patients. Yet the free flow of data also poses security risks. He tells hosts Mark Masselli and Margaret Flinter what protections Americans can... Read More Read More The post All of Your Health Information Is Now a Right Not a Privilege – ONC Head Tells Us More appeared first on Healthy Communities Online.

J Elvis talks about his cancer on his comedy album / protester arrested as she was demonstrating womens rights / Amy Schumer blamed for tampon shortage / Mark might do standup // Target clearing items due to being overstocked / Mark doesn't want to be seen on The Price is Right // Not telling your family about winning the powerball / Lotto is a stupid people tax / sports gambling vs regular gambling // Broncos sold to Walmart family / How Walmart made their money / Billionaires are a**holes / hugs from Elon Musk

Join Kimberly and guest, Sheranda V., for a conversation on making friends, rebuilding friendships, including rebuilding their own friendship! Why would two friends from freshmen year need to rebuild a friendship? How does that work? Is there any tension? Well, you won't know until you tune in! During this episode, you get to hear a side of Kimberly that only her close friends experience regularly. Let's take a look at some of the changes and transformations after the tunnel and when you are back in the light. Tune in and laugh with us, maybe even at us, but this episode is one for the books! Maybe we'll even get to hear from Miss Sheranda more? What do you think? Drop a note in our inbox or over on IG, links below! Follow Beauty Traille: @BeautyTrailleCosmetics Connect with the Show: @AmIinthewrongroom Send an email with feedback! podcast@amiinthewrongroom.com Connect with Kimberly: @KimberlyBoma Remember this podcast is not a substitute for therapy or a relationship with your own personal therapist. This podcast serves as a peer-to-peer connection. While mental health topics and conversations with the hosts' personal therapist are shared, no advice will top advice from a mental health professional who knows your personal situation. Resources: Find a Therapist Find a Psychiatrist Therapy for Black Girls Virtual Therapy for Black folks Therapy is a Right Not a Privilege Therapy for Latinx Therapy for Black Men Clinicians of Color Therapy for QPOC National Queer and Trans No Barriers to Therapy --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/aiitwr/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/aiitwr/support

Retail movies and TV shows, and a few retail stories! Clerks, Employee of the Month, 40 Year Old Virgin, Sausage Party, Empire Records, Mannequin (NOT with Tom Hanks LOL), Miracle of 34th Street, Cart, Carts, Clerks (again, because Meredith has a short memory), The Promotion, Office Space (Tchotchkes), Kim's Convenience, Superstore - TV Show, Paul Blast Mall Cop 1 and 2, Elf, Waiting, Breakfast at Tiffany's, High Fidelity, One Hour Photo, The Mist, Dawn of the Dead 1978, Intruder 1989, The Price is Right (NOT the actor Adam Sandler), Reaper - TV Show, Mallrats 1995, Cashback 2006, Confessions of a Shopaholic (ocal.media - Matt Loftus, Wikipedia, and imdb) Movie Trivia Questions (and Answers) All Movie Lovers Should Know https://www.rd.com/article/movie-trivia-facts/ (https://www.rd.com/article/movie-trivia-facts/) This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis: Podcorn - https://podcorn.com/privacy

It's the end of season 1! And this is the TENTH EPISODE! Cue crying….but before I go put my feet up…I mean interview and talk with guests, get the affirmations together and improve the show format. Let's talk about starting over. It's nowhere as terrible as it seems sometimes, maybe daunting and maybe heavy but I have some tips! I would appreciate if you could leave a 5-star review on iTunes/Apple Podcasts and Stitcher! Want to send some orange hearts for affirmations and journal prompts? Check out the links to Instagram below! Look at your body language: Amy Cuddy Ted Talk Connect with the Show: @AmIinthewrongroom Connect with Kimberly: @KimberlyBoma Remember this podcast is not a substitute for therapy or a relationship with your own personal therapist. This podcast serves as a peer-to-peer connection. While mental health topics and conversations with the hosts' personal therapist are shared, no advice will top advice from a mental health professional who knows your personal situation. Resources: Find a Therapist Find a Psychiatrist Therapy for Black Girls Virtual Therapy for Black folks Therapy is a Right Not a Privilege Therapy for Latinx Therapy for Black Men Clinicians of Color Therapy for QPOC National Queer and Trans No Barriers to Therapy --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/aiitwr/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/aiitwr/support

I'm back! We have to deal with the self-betrayal and figure out how to figure ourselves. The dog is back on my feet and I'm back in the studio….my home studio with affirmations and journal prompt out the azz! Check out the podcast this week and the resources I have listed below! I would appreciate it if you could leave a 5-star review on iTunes/Apple Podcasts and Stitcher! Want to send some orange hearts for affirmations and journal prompts? Check out the links to Instagram below! Therapy Thursday's with Pastor Jerry Flowers: Check out the latest here Sermon from Bishop TD Jakes (I realize, now, I kept saying Pastor T.D. Jakes and not Bishop, my apologies): The Riddle Connect with the Show: @AmIinthewrongroom Connect with Kimberly: @KimberlyBoma Remember this podcast is not a substitute for therapy or a relationship with your own personal therapist. This podcast serves as a peer-to-peer connection. While mental health topics and conversations with the hosts' personal therapist are shared, no advice will top advice from a mental health professional who knows your personal situation. Therapy Resources: Find a Therapist Find a Psychiatrist Therapy for Black Girls Virtual Therapy for Black folks Therapy is a Right Not a Privilege Therapy for Latinx Therapy for Black Men Clinicians of Color Therapy for QPOC National Queer and Trans No Barriers to Therapy --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/aiitwr/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/aiitwr/support

Hey Hey and welcome back! You've heard me say (if you've been tuning in) WHY saying to an abuse survivor that just leaving is an ineffective statement. In this episode I'm baring my emotions and experience and tell you what it's really like. What is going through the survivor's head and some of the battles that are being fought internally. I'm telling you now that you may be triggered so please, feel free to shut this off if you are. Although if you are thinking about leaving and don't know what to expect. This episode is for you. If you have a friend, loved one, or lost someone and still don't know what you are missing this is for you! And as always please remember that you can always reach out to a therapist, even if it's just someone to talk to! Resources: Find a Therapist Find a Psychiatrist Therapy for Black Girls Virtual Therapy for Black folks Therapy is a Right Not a Privilege Therapy for Latinx Therapy for Black Men Clinicians of Color Therapy for QPOC National Queer and Trans No Barriers to Therapy Connect with the Show: @AmIinthewrongroom Connect with Kimberly: @KimberlyBoma Remember this podcast is not a substitute for therapy or a relationship with your own personal therapist. This podcast serves as a peer-to-peer connection. While mental health topics and conversations with the hosts' personal therapist are shared, no advice will top advice from a mental health professional who knows your personal situation. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/aiitwr/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/aiitwr/support

BE SURE TO SEE THE SHOWNOTES AND LISTEN TO THIS EPISODE HERE Eve Picker: [00:00:10] Hi there. Thanks so much for joining me today for the latest episode of Impact Real Estate Investing. My guest today is Charmaine Curtis, who's had a significant career as a real estate developer on the West Coast. She owns her own company, Curtis Development and Company, and she's focused on impactful housing projects trying to crack the affordable in the land of unaffordable. But we're not video blogging, so you probably don't know that Charmaine has two strikes against her. She's a woman and she's Black. And if you've ever wondered what that's like, here's a chance to learn. Charmaine says that she didn't know what she was up against until she was in her 30s, when reality struck. "How much more personal wealth would I have, she wonders, if I were a white man?"   Eve: [00:01:12] Be sure to go to EvePicker.com to find out more about Charmaine on the show notes page for this episode and be sure to sign up for my newsletter so you can access information about impact real estate investing and get the latest news about the exciting projects on my crowdfunding platform. Small Change.   Eve: [00:01:36] Hello, Charmaine, it's just lovely to have you on my show.   Charmaine Curtis: [00:01:40] Well, it's really nice to meet you.   Eve: [00:01:42] Yes, I hope we meet in person some day ...   Charmaine: [00:01:45] Me too.   Eve: [00:01:45] ... when this silly pandemic is over, right?   Charmaine: [00:01:49] Yes.   Eve: [00:01:50] So, I wanted to ask by, start by asking you what, what drew you into real estate?   Charmaine: [00:01:59] It was a very serendipitous and intentional way. I got a master's degree in urban planning from UC Berkeley with every intention of being a planner and, you know, doing my part to save the world. And then I got jobs as, not counterplanner kind of jobs, which is, I think that most people think of planning, they think of people who are sitting at a desk in a municipal building and, you know, giving people information about what they are or not allowed to do on their properties. I worked for the redevelopment agency in Berkeley. But my first job, first of all, was working for Libby.   Eve: [00:02:35] Oh.   Charmaine: [00:02:35] Doing market studies. Yeah. You probably didn't hear that part.   Eve: [00:02:39] No.   Charmaine: [00:02:39] Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, Libby was the first person I worked for out of grad school.   Eve: [00:02:45] For our listeners, Libby, Libby Seifal heads up a growing women's development collaborative that we're both part of. So backgrounds. Go ahead.   Charmaine: [00:02:54] So. I went to work for the city of Berkeley, for the redevelopment agency, and I was just a young whippersnapper who threw out into the wilderness when they were trying to expand ... into a couple parts of the city. And, so I got chewed up in that process with very little support and realized I was really not interested in being a public employee. But I didn't know what I wanted to be at that point, because I had just spent these years getting a graduate degree. And then I serendipitously was introduced to a developer who was starting his own company and looking for a young whippersnapper to come and work for cheap and help him build this company. So, that's what happened, that, you know I kind of fell into the business, not intentionally, but through that introduction, which, which was great because I got to work on some super exciting projects in San Francisco that were really pioneering. And I got to learn the business, at least that side of the business. It was, it was a for-profit company converting loft buildings or warehouse buildings into lofts, which was a new thing for San Francisco, a very old thing for New York, but a new thing for San Francisco. So, that's how I got into the business. And I did that for a few years and really got, you know, sort of trial by fire, learning that, you know, all about entitlements and actually worked on one of the first low-income housing tax credit syndications in the country.   Eve: [00:04:32] Oh.   Charmaine: [00:04:32] We did all kinds of, it was just, it was a wacky thing. You know, some of it was consulting work that we did for others. But so, I got, I got a real broad range of experience in that, in that company.   Eve: [00:04:47] Kind of always the case when you're in a small company, isn't it? You get to do everything because there's no one else to do it.   Charmaine: [00:04:54] Yeah, and small was me and him. That was it was just the two of us at the beginning. And it was really, it was a great experience. And then it was a challenging experience as the company was growing. And I kind of felt like I was not able to grow as much with it at some point because other people were brought in. And so I decided to move on. And that was in the early 90s. And I decided I really wanted to learn the affordable housing side of the business and build some affordable housing. I mean, I was sort of, back to, you know, my part and trying to save the world, and I got a job working with an organization, it was called Catholic Charities at the time in San Francisco, but was later acquired, shall we say, by the Sisters of Mercy, who were starting their own development, affordable housing development, company, which is now, as you probably know, a pretty large national company, a non-profit, and based in Denver. And so that was really an interesting transition from being part of the male dominated Catholic Church to moving into the female dominated part, which was a revelation. And so many amazing, I mean, the women who were, who started that organization, including Sister Lillian Murphy, who died last year, I think, were just extraordinary women in every way, just in terms of their true passion for providing affordable housing and alleviating poverty, you know, trying to make a dent in poverty, not just, you know, putting people in buildings. And just because they were brilliant, you know, any of these women could have run a successful for-profit development venture. But, you know, they were nuns, and so they put their talents into building an operation to build more and more affordable housing, which is, now it's just, it's, it is, as I said, one of the largest nonprofits in the country. And, you know, that was also super informative experience for me. Also a burnout, because, you know, if you've worked in affordable housing, you know that at least here in California what it takes to put an affordable housing development together is like 10 pieces of funding, small pieces of funding from, from multiple sources and then trying to marry those sources. And the brain damage and the transaction costs of affordable housing is excessive. I was also, you know, I was being a project manager, and then I was, I was managing people, and then also managing projects, which just totally a recipe for burnout. You just can't do both.   Eve: [00:07:52] Right.   Charmaine: [00:07:53] I decided to take a break, and actually decided to go to film school, which I did ...   Eve: [00:07:59] Oh wow.   Charmaine: [00:07:59] Which I did well. And I went to film school at San Francisco State, and for a semester, and during that time, I was also working and doing consulting work for Mercy and others, and to support myself. It was something that I was passionate about, but it was also something that, you know, I didn't feel I had the financial bandwidth to pursue.   Charmaine: [00:08:28] I grew up in a working class family and I wasn't really intending to be a working class person, myself. You know, the goal was to move beyond that. And to do my family proud, and to do myself proud in terms of being able to do what all generations want to do, which is just do better than the one before or the ones before, especially when you're your Black person in in this country. And I had opportunities growing up because I was recruited into a program called A Better Chance. And I left my home in Cleveland to move to Minnesota where I went to high school for three years, and went back home on vacations. That program is a program that was founded on the East Coast back in the late 60s, early 70s, to identify promising young people, kids in inner city areas who were in crappy schools and to give them an opportunity to go to, initially boarding schools on the East Coast, but it expanded to the school like I went to in the Midwest, which was a public high school in a really wealthy suburb. So, I ended up getting into Dartmouth College after that. And so, you know, I was a smart kid and I had these opportunities and, you know, and I seized them. But, you know, getting those opportunities and taking advantage of them doesn't mean that you kind of leave behind all of your, you know, the baggage of coming from a family that, where my mother, everybody worked two or three jobs. And my mother grew up picking cotton in the South. And, you know, it's really not until, I would say probably in the last 10 years of my life or so, that I've really been able to sort of think about the impact, the sort of generational impact of, of poverty and, you know, slavery and racism in this country.   Eve: [00:10:29] Yeah, well, it sounds like in one generation you've come a long way.   Charmaine: [00:10:34] Indeed. I mean, I'm the one who from my immediate family that left Cleveland and, you know, kind of made my way in this insanely expensive world of San Francisco. So, after that, I kind of did some consulting on my own, and then when I went to work for a company, there was a for-profit developer. But they develop both market rate and affordable housing, which was kind of the best of all worlds for me. And I ran the multifamily part of that company and under a really great boss who is still somebody who I'm really close to. Art Evans, who was a, I think, a real visionary in the, in the field. And who came out of a redevelopment background and held that vision of both doing well and doing good. And I would say probably more doing good, ultimately. Art, he did a lot of really great work and ended up getting clobbered like a lot of people in the, in the Great Recession of 2008, 2009.   Eve: [00:11:36] Yeh.   Charmaine: [00:11:36] And then, I just did the addition the other day. I've been out on my own as long as I've worked for other people in the business. I've been on my own since 2004, and started out doing my own development, building condos in the East Bay and working on some stuff up in Seattle. And at the time I thought I had a financial partner who I thought was going to back my business, but that ended up not happening. And so I really ended up on a shoestring putting these deals together, between my own capital, and back in those days before the recession, you could do really high leverage ...   Eve: [00:12:11] Right, right.   Charmaine: [00:12:13] ... with participating debt and other kinds of financial participation by investors. And so, anyway, that was, that ended up being a, not a wise thing under the circumstances, which, of course, no one could have anticipated what was coming.   Eve: [00:12:28] No one. No one. That was a disaster.   Charmaine: [00:12:31] Yeah. And so, I built a couple of really nice projects that were in, what I would call transitional neighborhoods, which was the focus of my business plan, which was looking around the edges of, and looking at, you know, where people in San Francisco were fleeing to, frankly. Which was parts of Oakland and Berkeley, and seeing that those neighborhoods were ripe for ...   Eve: [00:12:57] Yes.   Charmaine: [00:12:57] ... change and also wanting to build an entry level product, not trying to ...   Eve: [00:13:03] Not luxury.   Charmaine: [00:13:03] ... not luxury, not, I would, I've never been interested in that, which I think was ultimately one of the reasons that my potential financial partner decided that he didn't want to invest in me, because I wasn't thinking that way. I wasn't thinking huge and expensive. My interest really is much more in transformation of neighborhoods in a relatively organic manner.   Eve: [00:13:26] And isn't that in the end, a little bit more recession proof, or a lot more recession-proof.   Charmaine: [00:13:31] Oh my God, if that was exactly my thinking at the time. Yeah.   Eve: [00:13:35] In 2008, 2009, I had a number of buildings in Pittsburgh that I had redeveloped, sort of against the grain. They were transformational. They were, I don't want to say luxury products, but they weren't affordable because I couldn't, just couldn't get the numbers right. But they were different. And honestly, I barely felt the recession. It was very odd because they were in underserved neighborhoods and places that most people weren't looking at, just as you said, on the edges. Right?   Charmaine: [00:14:05] Yeah.   Eve: [00:14:05] It was an interesting learning experience for me.   Charmaine: [00:14:09] Yeah. You know, if I'd been at a different stage in those projects, I might have been able to pull it out. But one was not yet complete. It was about 75 percent done. And the other one was basically complete.   Eve: [00:14:21] Oh yeh, almost done, yeh.   Charmaine: [00:14:24] We were just starting sales. So, it was, you know, lenders were not feeling it.   Eve: [00:14:33] That's really painful.   Charmaine: [00:14:33] Oh my God.   Eve: [00:14:34] Oh, that's painful, you know.   Charmaine: [00:14:36] It was awful. And it really, I think took me a good 10 years to recover both financially and emotionally from it. Frankly, it was really, it was devastating. It was, you know, I talked to, I was talking to one of the local developers here who's done well and I think comes from wealth. And  that, he said to me we were at a conference or something and he said, I personally lost six million dollars. And I'm like, oh, really? Well, I kind of lost everything except for my house. And so, you know, sorry, but our pain is not equal.   Eve: [00:15:09] Yeh.   Charmaine: [00:15:09] So, it, yeah, it's, that's the difference, you know for me in a way that crystallizes the difference between being a Black woman who comes from where I come from, with my sensibilities. Right? Not just, I didn't get into development, too, I mean, I think maybe initially I did kind of get into development to become a rich person and, you know, prove that that's possible for a Black woman to do that in the industry. But it's the difference between being, you know, someone who doesn't come from resources versus someone who does. And who is then able to build more races on top of those resources, that provide the cushion that you need when the shit hits the fan. So. It was a crystallizing experience for me that way, in terms of, the just the stark difference. Everyone was not impacted equally by that. What happened, for sure. Since then to, that my daughters were born in 2008. I was lucky to, you know actually marry later in life and have these two girls with my husband. And that was 2008. While the world was crashing down around me, I was also pregnant and with twins and ...   Eve: [00:16:20] Oh!   Charmaine: [00:16:20] So, they were born in late 2008 and I spent the next few years just rebuilding, basically, and working on a really interesting project I worked on exclusively for a few years, which is a master plan and community work and both, internal community work with this public housing project in San Francisco and, and the surrounding community to re-envision what was a 600-unit project over 39 acres into what would be, what will be a 1600-unit mixed-income project and ...you know, in addition to working all the physical planning, working with the community to get their buy in and support, and working with the folks who live in the public housing to help them envision a better future, and to bring a new way of working with very low-income people. That's ongoing, and that is really, I didn't do on my own, or at all. There were many other people involved in this community building effort and really, in recognizing the trauma that comes with generational poverty and all the, you know, the things that happen to people who live in poverty and that keep them down. And so, that has been, and continues to be, a reasonably successful effort to lift, not just rehouse people in better housing, but to sort of lift them up and provide, protect the developmental health of the littlest ones, in particular, by also helping their parents.   Eve: [00:18:06] yes.   Charmaine: [00:18:06] So, that was a really great opportunity for me to do this amazing work on what will be a transformative project in that part of San Francisco. And now I am doing development on my own or with others and co-development capacity. And I'm still doing, I'm doing development consulting work. That gig with the nonprofit, where I did the master planning work and all that other work, was a consulting gig. And so, you know, really just the last many years been about finding the balance between supporting my family in this insanely expensive town and reinvigorating my development career as a principal, which is where it's at for me because I like to create things, you know.   Eve: [00:18:52] Yes, I know that.   Charmaine: [00:18:54] And in order to create, you need to have some measure of control ...   Eve: [00:18:57] Yeh.   Charmaine: [00:18:57] ... which is when I started my business, in 2004, that was a moment when I was just on fire with, with passion to make buildings and be a part of transforming neighborhoods.   Eve: [00:19:10] Yeah.   Charmaine: [00:19:11] And I feel like I've kind of rediscovered that, that passion in the last few years.   Eve: [00:19:16] It's such a great thing to make, like something happen out of nothing.   Charmaine: [00:19:20] Exactly.   Eve: [00:19:20] It's so great. There's really nothing like it.   Charmaine: [00:19:22] Yeah. And it's, I mean, that's really, I'm just a very, you know, goal oriented, like I can see it and touch it and feel it at the end of it, I'm so happy. If I can't touch it, see it and feel I'm like, what am I doing? What is, what is this?   Eve: [00:19:35]  Yes.   Charmaine: [00:19:37] So. I'm definitely a ... touch feel person and love, love to see the results.   Eve: [00:19:43] Oh yeah, me too. So, you are a Black woman in an industry that is incredibly, heavily dominated by white men, and I know that's impacted your work, but I'd love to hear from you ... how.   Charmaine: [00:19:59] You know, I will start answering that question by talking about a TV show I watched last night, which is a new show on Hulu called "Woke." And it's really interesting. I suggest you check it out. It's ...   Eve: [00:20:16] I will check it out. I'm writing it down.   Charmaine: [00:20:18] I think it just dropped last night. And it's based on the life of a cartoon artist, named, I think, Keith Knight, who invented these cartoon characters. And I don't know if the true story is butter and toast, but those were the characters, the cartoon characters in his strip, that he was, that this show was talking about. And how this guy, this Black guy thought that he was kind of exempt from, you know, the impact from being impacted by Blackness in this country until he was taken down by some cops and, you know, thrown to the ground and guns at his head because they thought that he was a mugger who had just been reported, and how that experience transformed him, and his thinking, and his perception of himself in the world. It's the first one, I just watched the first one, and I'm like, oh, my God, that's kind of me in my 30s, you know. I thought, oh, my God, I'm, I'm smart, I'm driven, I work hard, and therefore I will succeed in this business. And, you know, while there's always, you know, when you're a Black person who comes from poverty in this country, I think there's always another part of you that's back there saying, hh, that's not going to happen, Come on. But I, basically I would say I took for granted, for a very long time, what a disadvantage I was at being a Black woman in the business. I thought my smarts was enough. And it, you know, it's just not.   Eve: [00:22:01] And, It should be enough, right?   Charmaine: [00:22:02] Well, yeah. In a in a in a perfect world.   Eve: [00:22:06] In a perfect world. Yeah. Yeah.   Charmaine: [00:22:08] But, you know, in a way I, I think it was liberating to not see that limitation, like, at least not ostensibly. I probably felt it more than I saw it. And you know, and I, I built a great reputation here in this city and this region, parts of the region, anyway. But what I would say honestly and truthfully, and this is, this comes from somebody who was really hard on herself a lot of the time. If I were a white dude in this business with my skills, ability, talent, vision, I would be, you know, five times richer than I am. And have more opportunity thrown at me than I do. You know, it really just took me a really long time to actually come to that conclusion because I'm so driven, and have, and took so much for granted, frankly, about what my smarts and what my drive would get me. That said, you know, if I look sort of relative to where I come from, what my background is, you know, my mother picking cotton, my stepfather working eight thousand jobs to support us, I've done well, especially in this region where it's so hard to live. But would my career have taken a different path if I were a white dude? Absolutely. And I, I think there's a level of just not being taken seriously as a Black person in this industry. It's not even at that level. It's almost just like it's not not being taken seriously. It's just not being seen. And, and .... you're, it's not like you're invisible, but it's almost like you're invisible. Because there's a presumption that especially as a Black woman, I mean, there are some Black men in this industry in the Bay Area who've done well. Not many. I'm going to say three.   Eve: [00:24:17] Yes.   Charmaine: [00:24:17] But as a Black woman, I think it is just, it is just a given on a very subconscious level, for most people that you are not, you don't have what it takes to, you know, to do what white men can do in this business. And I think it's on some level that is something that I internalized at some point in my career. And in addition to, just all the internal stuff that Black people experience in this country, you know, from living in generations of the degradation of racism, that you see and that you don't see. Right? It's almost the unseen stuff that is worse than ... and you've heard, probably heard people say, I'd rather be Black in the south where the racism is just in your face than be Black in the north, where it's, it's implicit and unspoken, but very real nonetheless. It's hard to know, you know, what we were talking about before we started, you started to start recording, it's hard to know what you don't know. It's hard to know how your life and career trajectory would be different if you were who you were in a different body ...   Eve: [00:25:33] Right.   Charmaine: [00:25:34] ... in the body of a white man. So, it's, You know, it's complicated.   Eve: [00:25:40] It's actually quite heartbreaking.   Charmaine: [00:25:42] Yeah.   Eve: [00:25:42] You know.   Charmaine: [00:25:43] Even before the events of this year, I've been, and when I started out in 2004, it wasn't like I didn't understand that I was a Black woman in the business. I did. And part of what I really wanted to prove, and want to prove is that a Black woman, you know, a smart Black woman who is hard-working and can accomplish anything, basically, like no limitation. There are no limitations, you know, and there are, obviously. But there's still that drive in me to prove that a Black woman can be a serious success in this business. How I'm defining that, now, is probably different than it was then, because I am really about creating a different kind of world. I'm not, you know, when I was younger in the business, I was like, this is, I'm going to make a ton of money, I'm going to prove, because the measure of success in this industry is wealth. I've had this conversation with my husband many times. It's like, what a success look like in the development business. If you are a white guy, it looks like, or if you're anybody, it looks like how wealthy you are and how much money you've made. And the world is just the direction that we are moving in. I feel like it is really vital that people like me, and everybody, deploy their talents in the interest of the whole and not just themselves. That's the world I want my kids to be able to grow up in, is a world that's not a winner-take-all world, and so, that's really kind of how I'm thinking more, lately, is how can I deploy my talents in a way that's going to help to create that world where development can be a force for real transformation. And what needs to happen in the industry for that to happen? What conditions need to exist for that to happen? And there's so many different parts of it, I know that you are familiar with because you're a developer.   Eve: [00:27:48] you know what you're saying really rings for me, too, I think when I was younger, I always thought I would figure out a way to fit in to the structure of the world the way it is. And quite a while ago, I heard the first female three-star general of the Army speak, and someone in the audience asked her like, well, how do you fit into that power structure? And she, she drew a circle on a chalkboard and she said, OK, here's the power. And you keep the circle, and you keep trying to get in, and you keep trying to get in, and you keep trying to get in. And eventually you give up and you go over here, and she draws another circle, and you make your own circle of power. And I think that, you know, there are some people who are never going to change that first circle, but then there are the rest of us who want to do something different.   Charmaine: [00:28:35] Yeh, yeh, and it's really about building a movement and, or being part of a movement, and helping to build a movement to a more equitable way of developing ...   Eve: [00:28:44] Yes.   Charmaine: [00:28:44] ... our world. And I've been thinking a lot in the last few years about just how there's sort of two, especially here in the Bay Area, there's really two kind of extreme ends of the spectrum. Where we have a really robust nonprofit community on one end, which is largely, mostly comprised of white people, just as an aside, and a very robust market-rate world of development, which is mostly, also, white people ...   Eve: [00:29:15] Also white people ...   Charmaine: [00:29:15] ... more women on the nonprofit side, for sure.   Eve: [00:29:20] Yes, absolutely, because they paid less. Right?   Charmaine: [00:29:23] Yeah, exactly. And, and they are, you know, they're just, I don't know, I don't know what the difference is. There's so many differences between women and men.   Eve: [00:29:31] It's the same profile in Pittsburgh. I have to tell you ...   Charmaine: [00:29:34] Yeh.   Eve: [00:29:34]  ... it's exactly the same.   Charmaine: [00:29:36] Yeh.   Eve: [00:29:36] It's really interesting.   Charmaine: [00:29:37] But there's a sort of middle ground that's not occupied. And I think that there is a middle ground. I think there should be a middle ground, and that it should be occupied by people like me who want to use their talents to develop in a more equitable way. Which means in a way that really is not profit driven, but in a way that is driven by market principles, in a way. Because I do believe, personally, and I, this may be a controversial statement, I think that the non-profit world is not driven by the same principles that the for-profit world is.   Eve: [00:30:14] Oh, no, I totally agree, I totally agree.   Charmaine: [00:30:16] I've been on both sides. I've seen it. I've seen how I treat my money, like actually my, you know, versus some ...   Eve: [00:30:26] No, absolutely.   Charmaine: [00:30:26] ... government entity that's like three, you know, three things removed from me. So, I do believe there is a real difference. And I've been on both sides, and I developed for my own account, and I know how to drive a deal and move in to reduce the cost to the lowest possible amount while producing something that I don't have to be ashamed of.   Eve: [00:30:49] Well, you're driven, you're driven by urgency, and much of the nonprofit world is not, because they don't have to worry about the costs and staying alive in the same way.   Charmaine: [00:30:59] Right. The cost or the time.   Eve: [00:31:01] Yeah. Yeah.   Charmaine: [00:31:02] And I'm not blaming anybody or anything. This is just the system that we have created.   Eve: [00:31:08] Yeh.   Charmaine: [00:31:08] And I really believe, I believe very strongly, and I've been talking about this for, you know, a few years now, that I believe that there is a third way to do development. You know, where I am not interested in trying to, I don't want to generate tons of profits for anybody else. And I don't want to generate, I don't need to generate tons of profit for myself. I would like to make money, a reasonable amount of money, that is commensurate with whatever the level of risk is that I'm taking. And the less risk I take, the less money I make. And the more, the less profit somebody else makes, the more we can use that for the benefit of the people we're developing for. And I've been thinking about that ...   Eve: [00:31:50] Yeh.   Charmaine: [00:31:50] ... largely here in the context of missing middle housing, which is truly missing, like, gone, like doesn't exist.   Eve: [00:31:58] Really.   Charmaine: [00:32:00] And I don't know how you do missing middle housing. It's really a fee-driven business. It has to be in, if your heart is in the right place and you're coming at it from the right perspective and in the interest of long term affordability, and not just, you know, a five, 10, even a 15-year old and then flipping and realizing gains ... I think you really you really are coming at it from that perspective of, this is a fee business, this is a fee driven business, which nonprofit development is too, but it's a fee-driven business that brings market-driven principles to the production.   Eve: [00:32:38] Yeah, so you produce something and then it has a life of its own.   Charmaine: [00:32:41] Yeah. And there are many, many elements to this. A lot of people are talking about, you know, modular is one aspect or building innovation, since we build buildings like cave people did, basically, to a large extent. And innovations in financial markets, which means really bringing people into financial markets who are not looking at achieving the, a typical kind of market return that you would get if you were investing.   Eve: [00:33:09] Yeah, well, that's that's the key.   Charmaine: [00:33:11] That is the key.   Eve: [00:33:11] That capital is less greedy.   Charmaine: [00:33:13] Exactly.   Eve: [00:33:13] Yeh.   Charmaine: [00:33:14] Taking the greed out of the bit, of this part of the business. And I'm a pragmatist at bottom. And so I'm like, we live in a capitalist world, in society. I'm like, that's, let's just say that, that's what we are. We're going to, that's always going to be a big part of who we are and how we live. And, you know, the nonprofits are doing God's work. But I do believe there is room for a third way to approach how we get stuff done. And we just have to bring, bring all of the all the, you know, creativity and passion, and bring others along into ... Being real about it. Because in the world of social impact investing, I, I hear about it a lot. I have not, I can ,I can't tell you that I've seen one development that I think benefited from whatever that is, at least the kind of development I'm talking about. There's like a new organization in San Francisco that is attracting, I think, real social impact capital. It's still money coming from wealthy people who expect a return, which I actually find that, slightly appalling, because I, I do think that if, you know, the one or even the five percent deployed even a portion of their capital in a way that was like, eventually give me my money back, and I don't expect you to give me any return on it, but I'd like it back someday.   Eve: [00:34:46] I don't mind a return that keeps up with inflation, but I'm with you completely. I posted on Small Change, I've listed projects that are affordable housing and heard complaints about the return not being high enough. And I'm actually, how can I say, unhappy with where we are, because I think the return should be as low as three percent ...   Charmaine: [00:35:08] Yeah.   Eve: [00:35:08] ... to really build affordable housing. And yet, I have to admit, I'm scared of listing a project with a return that low. I had a conversation with an amazing developer of a project just like that that really, you know, should be on that platform. And I don't know if anyone's going to invest.   Charmaine: [00:35:26] Yeah.   Eve: [00:35:27] Because it's not enough money for them. So, if they really want impact. I mean, don't people understand that the higher the return on equity, the less affordable the housing? Because, I don't ...   Charmaine: [00:35:38] I think some people do and some people don't. And I think there's a significant education aspect to this that has to occur so that people do understand that there is a direct relationship.   Eve: [00:35:50] Yeah.   Charmaine: [00:35:50] I think that we will eventually, hopefully be in a world where there is a concept of 'having enough.'   Eve: [00:35:57] Yeah, yeah, yeah.   Charmaine: [00:35:58] If you have a net worth of 100 million dollars, that's enough. And you can then use the rest of whatever you have in a way that is to the benefit of the general good. And those who don't have.   Eve: [00:36:11] Yeh.   Charmaine: [00:36:11] And that's really what we need. We need a paradigm shift in how we think about our individual responsibility as citizens of the world.   Eve: [00:36:22] Yeh, and then, of course, there are the small investors who've never had a chance to invest before. You know, where that 500 dollars ...   Charmaine: [00:36:29] Yeh.   Eve: [00:36:29] ... really matters, maybe even more than the millions of the billionaire. Right? And I want them to get a return. It's very difficult. It's very inequitable.   Charmaine: [00:36:39] Yeah.   Eve: [00:36:39] So my next question would be, well, you know, what would you change to make the real estate industry a more equitable place for Blacks and women? Maybe just ignore the rest of them?   Charmaine: [00:36:52] Yeah, you know, I mean, that's obviously, there's no magic bullet. There's no, I mean, we're seeing now in 2020 how deeply ingrained white supremacy is in our culture. A couple hundred years after slavery ended. So, I am not naive about the, and I don't like to be airy fairy and unrealistic about the possibilities. You know, I think that one thing I see in San Francisco happening is that, at least in the nonprofit world, is that nonprofits are making an active effort to hire more Black people on their staffs, which I applaud, especially if you are hiring people and then supporting them in the way that they need to be supported, and not just having people be window dressing. So, how do how do we change the hearts and minds of Americans who don't even perceive themselves as being racist, but who have, you know, probably relatively deep implicit bias, which is a lot of what I was talking about earlier that I have experienced with, that I didn't even know I was experiencing, right? Is the deep, implicit bias of people who think that Black people are not as smart and not as whatever, as others, as whites or Asians, if it is a true awakening or call to action or whatever that's happening now that's also, you know, both sides are kind of awakened. Right?   Eve: [00:38:13] Right.   Charmaine: [00:38:13] But if it's happening and this leads to a reckoning that is not, hopefully, violent, and that doesn't tear us apart, I think that this is a very good thing because I do see more white people that I know than ever before trying to examine their own racism and ... people who never thought of themselves as racist, which is very important because if you think you're not racist and you're white, you are not woke, you are not awake. And so it's very important for, and it's not a blamey thing, it's just like, this is the work. This is the work that must be done, if we're going to change this world so that Black kids have an opportunity anywhere near what a white kid can have in this country. And, you know, begins at that level of zero, you know, like birth and what you are born into. What happens to you between the ages of zero and five, how your psychology is, develops and it's impacted by that and other things, and your sense of agency and capability and power in the world. That's got to start at zero. It is remediable to some extent along the way. Right? And I'm kind of proof of that.   Eve: [00:39:38] Right.   Charmaine: [00:39:39] But, you know, that's like one level of what has to happen. And, and making opportunities or providing opportunities for more Black people and people of color consciously, and not just consciously in the hiring and then bringing in, but then once people are in, giving them what they need, helping them to succeed and not just taking for granted, we did the hire, now we're done. So, there's that level of building opportunity. And I think that we need more Black people in the industry and just getting more Black people in the industry and whatever ways that happens will be a good thing. I did not know until, maybe until I was in graduate school what a developer was.   Eve: [00:40:32] Yeh, I was a bit older, actually.   Charmaine: [00:40:34] Yeah, right. I mean, it's like, it is amazing how many people who I told them, when I tell them I'm a developer, they're like, what is that? Still. Right? So ...   Eve: [00:40:43] Yeah.   Charmaine: [00:40:44] So, teaching these little, kids at a very young age, what the opportunities are in life in general outside of the what everybody thinks of as being a doctor, a lawyer, you know, or a business person, in general, that there is this whole world where how our physical world is created, that is dominated by this industry.   Eve: [00:41:09] Yeah. And, you know, real estate surely should play a really big role in, in shifting generational wealth as well. I'm not, I've been thinking about that, and I think there are ideas, all sorts of ways that that might happen. I'm not exactly sure how yet, but wealth has to do with property ...   Charmaine: [00:41:30] Right.   Eve: [00:41:30] ... not just cash.   Charmaine: [00:41:32] That's right. That's why the wealthiest people own, families in this country up until recently, were real estate families, by and large.   Eve: [00:41:40] Right.   Charmaine: [00:41:42] Now it's tech. But ...   Eve: [00:41:43] Yeah. How do you teach that? How do you make that shift, make that happen?   Charmaine: [00:41:50] You heard me say earlier that, you know, and I have this conversation. I've been having this conversation with a guy I met recently who's a Black guy, who's doing some investing, and he is about, you know, sort of the wealth building, as a Black person in the, in the industry. And I get that, and I understand that, and I don't not support that, but I cannot really abide wealth building amongst a very few people, while other people are out in the cold.   Eve: [00:42:25] Yeh.   Charmaine: [00:42:25] That's not sitting right with me anymore.   Eve: [00:42:29] Yes.   Charmaine: [00:42:29] So, I'm torn about it. I mean, you can hear it in my voice. I'm torn about it because I do want to see more Black people succeed, but I want to see a lot more Black people succeed. You know, not just a few.   Eve: [00:42:44] Yeah, yeah.   Charmaine: [00:42:45] So how do we do that? We spread the wealth. You know, we have to find ways to spread the wealth. And that goes back to my comment about needing a paradigm shift in how we think about our responsibilities as humans on the planet, to each other and to our children and to other people's children. I'm interested in building wealth. I'm just not interested in building ...   Eve: [00:43:12] Uber wealth.   Charmaine: [00:43:12]  ... yes, I'm not interested in being, you know (laughter) how many people in the world can have a net worth of ten million dollars? Can everybody? You know, is that a possibility? Is that a..   Eve: [00:43:27] It's an extra interesting calculation to do if you.   Charmaine: [00:43:30] Yeah. Is that a theoretical possibility even, you know? And ...   Eve: [00:43:30] That's really interesting. Or even a million, you know.   Charmaine: [00:43:38] Yeah. What are the, what are the trade offs there? And I don't know what they are. I just know that everybody can't be rich. So then, you know, then I back off, I keep backing away from that, what can everybody, what is enough? And I start with, I really start with, like housing. There's some things people should just absolutely, simply be entitled to. And housing, stable housing, stable, sanitary, decent housing is one of those things. And access to an education and the resources that you need to learn, that are not just about teachers and schools, but if you need, you know, help with your mental health or whatever you need help with to be somebody who's able to learn and be a real contributor. These are basic things. And then we, we do these basic things, we build a better world where there will be more of everybody, more opportunity for everybody.   Eve: [00:44:39] Yes. Well, you're going to make me cry, so I'm going to try harder. I hope everyone who listens will try harder, too. But I've really, really enjoyed this conversation. I feel awful ending it. But I'm going to now.   Charmaine: [00:44:56] Well, I'm looking forward to talking more with you. Yeah.   Eve: [00:45:00] I would love to meet you in person. And maybe there's some joint venture we can do. I love doing development and I love hearing about what, what you're working on. So, thank you very much.   Charmaine: [00:45:10] Thank you, Eve. It's really great talking and, we will be in touch.   Eve: [00:45:23] That was Charmaine Curtis, a real estate developer, a Black woman in a largely white, male industry. It's hard enough to be a real estate developer and make a living at it without those additional two strikes against you. But that is exactly what she is doing.   Eve: [00:46:03] You can find out more about impact real estate investing and access the show notes for today's episode at my website EvePicker.com. While you're there, sign up for my newsletter to find out more about how to make money in real estate while building better cities. Thank you so much for spending your time with me today. And thank you, Charmaine, for sharing your thoughts. We'll talk again soon. But for now, this is Eve Picker, signing off to go make some change.

Read by the author, Dr. mOe Anderson, from her seventh book Never Close Your Heart. This new novel is the stand-alone sequel to the Essence Bestseller When A Sistah's Fed Up. Listen and order your copy today at . Synopsis: Unless it's under reconstruction...never close your heart. Never Close Your Heart is a humorous and heartfelt story about love, family, and the power of forgiveness… Ambitious and beautiful, Faith Henry is a savvy woman. By all measures—her career, friendships, and financial accounts—she is certifiably successful. Right? Not so fast. She’s hopelessly entangled in the ties that bind: Her millennial daughter, Sloane, has returned to the nest with an electronic ankle monitor, gender-fluid child, meek husband, and very bad attitude. Her son, Trey, is in a relationship with an older woman who has questionable motives. Friends are tsk tsking Faith’s choice to replace her decades-long significant other with a series of online mismatches—and that longtime manfriend is wasting no time moving on. Things are so bad, even her ex-husband is a friend. And she’s tempted to grant him benefits. How did this happen? Ten years ago, vowing to control her own destiny, she left her marriage and career in politics. She strategically crafted and executed a fail-proof plan to build a new life. Her life. On her terms. Those goals are almost within her grasp. As the talent behind the popular Never Close Your Heart podcast, Faith’s insightful advice is increasingly going viral. She’s attracting the potentially lucrative attention of a media conglomerate—complicated by the not-so-welcome overtures of a menacing superfan. As her followers can attest, Faith’s superlative advice about relationships is unequaled. Amid the swirl of drama, controversy, and danger that threatens her and her family, will she heed her own words?

We often think “the stock market” is synonymous with Wall Street. Stressed out stockbrokers yelling and wearing blazers. New York City. Right? Not necessarily. There are other stock markets all around the world, and they all have different degrees of influence on everything else. That’s how a global economy works. And that’s what Dustin and Joseph discuss in this new episode. WHAT YOU’LL LEARN [02:07] We’re in a global economy  [06:15] What we think of when we hear “stock market”  [08:25] Is McDonald’s an American company?   [09:46] How to envision the global economy  [12:33] Easy trading + quarantine = a big old mess  [15:18] What you can learn from Dave Portnoy’s stock mess   [19:19] The power of other stock markets   Making the world a smaller place What do you think of when you hear the words “stock market?”  We typically don’t think of the Chinese stock market, European stock market, London Stock Exchange, and so on. Dustin explained that he thinks of the world market, but most people typically refer to the S&P 500, aka Standard & Poor’s 500.  The S&P 500 is one index of the biggest, most well-known companies in the world, many of which are headquartered in tiny little New York City. But while we might think of the S&P as an American stock index, it’s made up of multinational corporations.  Can you still call a company “American” when it makes money all over the globe? Here’s an example.  Dustin asked Joseph, “Is McDonald’s an American company?” We think of it as one because it was founded in America. And, well, burgers seem to be as American as baseball and apple pie.  But if we use sales to figure out that question...our answer might look a little different.  What percentage of the McDonald’s revenue is American? According to a brochure Dustin found from ten years ago, it was 34 percent. The rest was foreign sales. The same stats for Coca-Cola? Just 25 percent of their revenue was American!  As the global economy grows stronger and we become even more interconnected, we’re sure those numbers are even lower today.  How to picture the global economy Here’s how you can envision the way the global economy works: imagine that you’re standing in a circle with five other people, holding hands. The person to your right tugs on your hand. You feel it, right? If they pull hard enough, you might even stumble and fall. Now, imagine the person across from you does the same thing with their neighbor. You don’t directly feel it on your hand, but you do feel that movement ripple throughout the group. If they yank hard enough, their neighbor may fall. And the person next to them might be taken down, too. Pull hard enough, cause enough damage, and everyone in the circle might end up on the ground in a big heap. We want other countries to do well in a global economy, because what happens in one country affects the rest of us. The 2008 financial crisis, for example, started in the U.S., but its effects were felt worldwide. We know you’re probably tired of this phrase, but it applies to the global economy, too. We’re all in this together.  This material is for general information only and is not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual. RESOURCES & PEOPLE MENTIONED   Money and The Reserve Currency System in Episode 114  About Dave Portnoy’s stock snafu on Twitter Check out our new program, Wealth by Design™ DIY! Join the Know Your Numbers challenge Schedule a free call with us — Are we a good fit for your financial planning needs?   CONNECT WITH DANIELLE AND DUSTIN Ask Your Questions On Facebook On Twitter

 Discover how to increase your email list through developing loyal and engaged subscribers Learn how to develop a really strong connection, that profitable, authentic relationship with your subscribers Gain insights on how devoting your time to writing striking weekly newsletters can increase your email list Resources/Links: Check out Linda’s Website: https://6figurenewsletters.com/love-trust-buy/ Summary Are you struggling to gain loyal and engaged subscribers in your email list? Are you devoting your time to write remarkable weekly newsletters that address your subscribers’ needs and their issues? Linda Puig is a relationship-marketing expert, key phrase "relationship marketing", and founder of Ready2Go Articles, which provides professionally written done-for-you content that helps you market with ease, and she's also the author of The Six-Figure Newsletter. In this episode, Linda shares her insights on how to transform your email list into loyal subscribers by taking time in developing and writing newsletters that addresses your subscribers’ needs. Check out these episode highlights: 01:22 - Linda’s ideal client: “My audience is primarily solopreneurs. Solo individuals in business for themselves who coach, who consult, who teach online typically, and otherwise support their clients, their students to transform, transform their business, transform their lives, their relationships, their finances.” 01:45 - Problem Linda helps solve: “Well, these people want to be able to send emails and make money, and experience, you know, the freedom that comes with that, but they haven't taken the time to develop that loyal, engaged subscriber list. And that's really the only way that you can turn those kinds of people into clients and customers.” 02:20 - Typical symptoms that clients do before reaching out to Linda: “They're miserable. Well, they're busy seeing clients, first of all. They're busy building their business, they're busy having a life, they're busy, right? They're busy. They don't feel like they have any other time in their world to squeak out writing content to email, an email list. Right? Not only that, they feel uncertain about what to write to, you know, develop that really strong connection, that profitable, authentic relationship. They lack confidence often in their writing skills, they may have had a teacher tell them, "Your writing stinks" or, you know, some of them say that they would rather have their tooth pulled than sit down and write an article.” 03:38 - Common mistakes that people make before they find Linda’s solution: “Yeah. The two biggest ones are that first of all, they don't really know who they're writing to. You know, they haven't jumped inside the skin of their ideal client that they're attempting to attract and serve. So, they don't know what they're really all about or what makes them tick or what makes them stay up late at night. You know, thinking and ruminating and whatnot.” 05:50 - Linda’s Valuable Free Action (VFA): “Well, I guess I can answer it in two parts. The first one really is to just start writing. But what I want you to do is to actually open up an account with a free email service provider, and you can use this to practice or you can use it to start connecting with your audience right away. And I recommend the second one, and just start writing to them. I know a gentleman that's an Aussie, by the way, who started writing an email list of maybe 25. Over the course of a year, he just wrote, and wrote, and wrote nurture content. Did not make any offers during that period of time. And by the end of that, that period, there were at least 7000 people on his list. And not just 7000 people, but 7000 motivated people. So just go. Just start.” 07:00 - Linda’s Valuable Free Resource (VFR): Check out Linda’s Website: https://6figurenewsletters.

This week: There's never enough time, I'm always too busy.. Right? Not anymore! In this week's really practical episode, Amy shares with you specific tools and ideas that can support you to find more time, and be more purposeful with the time that you have. We're looking at how you can be more present in what you do each day, how you can focus without an overflowing mind bank of things to remember, and how you can get more done. Life On Purpose is all about embracing who we are as women, and how we show up as our true, authentic selves every day.

This week, in Belle Terre, New York, a wealthy couple is found dead, in their own home. The only other person in the house is their adopted teenage son, who makes a full confession, including the motive of being angry about not getting a new sports car. Case closed. Right? Not even close. What follows is a tale of lies, corruption, and outright insanity. One of our craziest yet!!   Along the way, we find out rich people don't need fire insurance, that you don't need evidence if you have a confession, and that sometimes you need to investigate that confession!!   Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman    New episodes every Thursday!    Donate at: patreon.com/crimeinsports or go to paypal.com & use our email: crimeinsports@gmail.com    Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things Small Town Murder & Crime In Sports!    Follow us on...    twitter.com/@murdersmall    facebook.com/smalltownpod    instagram.com/smalltownmurder    Also, check out James & Jimmie's other show, Crime In Sports! On iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to podcasts#

For a codependent, making complaints can sometimes be difficult, but there are a few things you can do now to make it easier (0:01) Disclaimer for the Audience (0:18) Be Your Own Bodyguard (3:20) Being an Objective Solicitor (8:05) Check-in Your Emotions (9:30) Politeness and Business Language (10:21) Logical Fallacies (12:52) Richard's Example of Complaint (14:30) Framing the Interaction (22:00) Self-pity as a Self-indulgence (26:10) Richard's Short Story About His Recovery (31:00) You Have a Right Not to Like Something (33:20) Stop Smiling (Toxic Fawning)

Noel is on her way to the job interview but...there are problems. But it's a problem she can't deal with now so...it's not a problem. Right? Not a problem for now, at least. Credits Writer - Nicole Tan Noel - Nicole Tan Bub - Alan Jiang Music Credits “The Confrontation” and “The Gall” by Podington Bear Facebook Twitter Patreon

Hello and welcome to warrior divas real talk for real women. This is your host Angie Lehman ro and in the studio with me today I have Connie Wyatt Coleman. She is a dear friend of mine. She has a long lineage of, of expertise that she brings to the table but more importantly she is a woman that's after Christ's heart and ferociously runs after him every day of her life. So I cannot wait to see we we talked a little bit about how this show may go. And then we said, You know what, we just need to have one of our talks on the air. So that's what we're doing today. Welcome, Connie. Good to be here. Good to be here. Rules of Engagement. No throw punches today. No throw punches. But that's what we do when we get together, right? Yes. And you know what i have treasured it. Very few friends will take friendship and allow accountability with it. And we've had a long history of being able to love each other and hold each other accountable at the same time. We have and you know, it's one of those things that we have laughed together. We have cried together. We have been mad together. We have watched our children grow together. When we met I didn't have grandchildren and now I do. That is crazy. And they're big. They're six getting to see him too. Yeah, they're beautiful. So, you know it's it's crazy. All the all the things that have happened your girls have grown up gone through high school ones about to get married, you know and, and praise the Lord she has not been a bridezilla. Oh, goodness. That is a Praise the Lord. Yes, I will take it in this day and age with everything going on in the world to kind of put some things in perspective. Yeah, puts things in perspective for us. So I'm glad to hear all that's going good and all of our lives but you know, we also know that not everybody's doing good with things going on in their world. It doesn't have to do with if you're hearing this and listening to this in the middle of the Coronavirus thing. It doesn't even have to do with that. Some people just have a hard time getting by day by day. life on this earth is just hard, right? It just is. I I watched a video. Last night somebody had a lady and a pantry. She was singing the song Jolene. But instead of singing it, please don't take my man it says please come and take my man. And she says, and if you don't answer I'll have to call Irene. And so I know this affects people in a humorous way it affects people in an angry way and a pic affects people in a lonely way. And one of the things we like to do on warrior divas is just shine a light into that darkness in so you can see a way out and we were talking last night and one of our studies in john, where you know, that where there was a challenge to the to the apostles to be that light and to continue to live that light out. Not To expose, but that that fear and evil cannot reside in the light. And truth is the way truth is the light. And so, you know, I started thinking, what are some of the ways that I could poke and prod Connie to open up the truth of Christ to to the audience today, you know, because she didn't take a whole lot doesn't take a whole lot. If you get to follow her on Facebook, she shares some little morning devotionals on there quite often that are very good, packed, powerful, very easy to read. And that's not an easy task for someone who is as educated as she is to speak the commoners language that I can read and understand. I love it. All these people getting on and sharing their messages on Facebook and all that stuff in there using all these big words and I'm like, okay, I didn't know I was gonna have to break a dictionary and a thesaurus to figure out what this person saying, I just want it to be relevant. And that's something that Connie does. Every time she shares in this season, haven't you? There's been a lot of ugly and we'll address some of that later. But there's been such an influx of creativity and letting their light shine like you're throwing them out and, and even people that maybe didn't before coming on and just time and time again, using all different ways of creativity to make it through this season to encourage other people to love on others, with social distancing in place, but right, you know, just some real creative ways to intentionally reach out to each other. Well, you know, and it's the what it was at the Dallas orchestra performed yesterday. For the first time together since the beginning of March and they did it all from their own living rooms and did it online together. Yeah. Wonderful. What a wonderful way of you know, right now one of the things that this is teaching us is how to push through limitations. What a great thing. You're telling me I can't do this, but I'm gonna find a way to still be relevant in the world I live in. Yes. And what a great thing for all of us. Wow. Yes, personally and professionally. I know. My staff up CEO at wise choices Resource Center in pregnancy Resource Center indicator and just getting together with the staff on zoom and going okay. We know what the box is. We know what our limitations are. We know what we can do safely and what we can't within the guidelines and protocol, but Okay, now, step outside the box. How can we continue to reach our clients To reach our partners in ways we haven't thought of before, right? That would be sustainable, really, even after this season is over, because there's the good news this season will eventually be over. Well, and while we're recording this today in the studio, we're actually recording this on Good Friday. We are. And the reason I kind of wanted to do that is it's a part of the time that we're in our darkest hour where it's actually between the 12 and 3pm. Our time I know that's not the time it is and in Jerusalem, but our time, this would be the time that was the darkest of the dark days going into Easter weekend. It's Friday, it's Friday, but you know what Sunday's coming. And we have the benefit of hindsight to see that. Yeah. But you know what Jesus had the full sight to prepare his disciples before that, so that they wouldn't have to live in fear so they wouldn't have to. They could see hope at the end. You know, I think the thing that gets me is how quickly we judge them. Mm hmm. Because I he tried to tell you, he tried like multiple times, yeah. But then I look at myself, right? And how many times has he fully told me and we have full revelation of Scripture, right? How many times has he shown me the plan and that he will not leave us he will not forsake us. He, he is coming again. And he is victorious. And we have the whole counsel of Scripture and yet we still back up and fear and we still wonder and doubt in the middle of the season if if what he said is true, and if it will hold true. So it's Real easy to look at Peter and go walk. How could you deny him? Right? Well, Connie, how can you live in fear and deny the power he has in your life? Well, we were talking about we read the, the gospel of john, in our group Bible study yesterday. And one of the things that we read about was right after that were Peter, you know, had denied him three times. But when Jesus made it so important to go and see his apostles multiple times after he, after he had risen, and there's the one occasion where he's talking with Peter. And he's telling asking Peter over and over Do you love me? And Peter saying, yes. And do you love me? Yes. And do you love me? Yes. Excuse me. And I think the reason gee This is asking him that is to get Peter to say yes to Him. But also for Peter to hear Jesus say that I love you get it sunken into Peter said, Peter is kinda like my six year old grandson. You got to repeat it a few times for it to sink in. And sometimes you might have to inflect your voice a little more than you really need to you know, it's that Moonstruck snap out of it moment. Oh, God has to do that to me. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Walking through a situation just this last week. And just like, Lord, I could really use the cliff notes at this point. Right. Right. One other chapter just who, let's, let's get some cliff notes here. But well, one of the other things we talked about in our study this week in our warrior divas Facebook group and if you're not a part of it, you should be a part of it because we're starting to do more and more studying in there. And because We're on a mission to equip and empower. Not just our generation of women, but women that are coming back behind us, you know, we want it to be a legacy project. And so one of the things we were discussing this week in there was how the Roman soldiers and pilot inherit, they had no clue as to what the scripture said. So when those Roman soldiers are at the feet of Jesus about this time of the day, and they're casting lots for his garment, they had no idea they were fulfilling prophecy. Yeah. The one that pure steam on the side and didn't break his legs. They had no idea they were fulfilling prophecy. And yet he realized who it was right? No, I I'm like you we kind of talked about this weekend and I can't believe you know, we're sitting here right now and Think about all the things that happened on that Friday and just like today, things you never dreamed, you would see happen, right? The Son of God hung on across Really? His disciples did not deny him. I mean, Christian people would rather loose Brabus than Jesus. I mean, who are we right? But then I start thinking about Saturday. And when the sun goes down, it's it's the Sabbath, right? And somehow in the middle of the chaos, and the trauma, they go back home, and even though they don't get it, they don't understand it in the middle of the doubt. When the hope of their expectation is in the tomb, they walk by faith And they cry out to the Lord on the Sabbath. And that, that Saturday to me has always been. I mean, you know how it is when you come through a trauma and and you get back to your house and you kind of sit down and you kind of start feeling yourself and see if you have, you know, do I have flesh wounds? Did I really survive this day? Did that really happen? And then Saturday, what, what do I even do with this? What do I even really still believe? Where is my heart Really? And in that quiet Saturday, they still observe the Sabbath. Right? They still honored what the what he had been setting in motion for years. And I think, I think right now is the time to do that. You know, I think some of the trauma of this COVID thing may be kind of adjusting and now we're moving into Okay, I've survived the first part, I'm not mortally wounded. I'm not bleeding anywhere. What do I do with today? Right? And that's when we come back and we draw on everything that the Lord has sewn into us. Yesterday, the day before, the in his previous sness He called us to a season of prayer or diving into the word and if we will, but sit still in his presence. He will draw those things out and you said give us the hope. That Sunday's common Sunday is going to get here he is going to fulfill His promises. He is going to draw us out of this. But I just feel like truly rotten, right in this season. That man this a Saturday season it feels like well, you know, I think there's some some big truth to the fact of the numbness that you just brought up. You know, when all this first started happening, I know I talk to a lot of people there. They're like, I've just slept a lot and watched a lot of Netflix I'm basically Netflix didn't chilled, which I know that there's another slang for that at times but, you know, sleeping and watching TV sleeping and watching TV, it was a it was a numbness it was this shell shock. It was a What do I do now there were some people that haven't slowed down our grocery workers, our truckers, our doctors and nurses. Those people haven't slowed down, our food processing plants, farmers, they all are still showing up every day. And so, for me, my husband and I own a plumbing company and our plumbing company. While our residential calls haven't been as much. Our commercial calls are still happening because we serve a lot of restaurants, hospitals, food processing plants, right. So for us life hasn't shifted as much as it has for others. I'm still doing coaching as a matter of fact, I've had people come and hire me since this happened because now they're shifting to add online to their already brick and mortar business or whatever it is. So I'm helping them through that transition along that ways. So that I still had a day or two where I was like, Whoa, what is this gonna do? And then my sleep schedule got off and all sorts of things. And like the apostles, I had to go, Okay, it's time to get up. Yeah, yeah, you know, I'm kind of like here. When this first started, God called me to go to the square there and indicator in our small town at seven o'clock every morning, and just pray around the square. And it was, I thought, just gonna be one day. And then when we when we were there that day is like, no, this is every day until this is done. And I was like, oh, Because I don't leave the house at 645 in the morning on a normal day. So, um yeah. So it's it's kind of been that kind of thing that God did that made me stay on a schedule. So I do that and then I go to the office and I'm only one there but you know, Hey, get the work done that needs to be done and then I'm home by two or three my husband's already retired so we were kind of already that's a new normal so getting used to him being retired and home. And so yeah, it hasn't changed as much as a lot of people's lives have. Man You're right. There's there's some people really adjusting and another thing we've talked about is just the grace that you know, your two days kind of came in the beginning. Someone else's reality hit or just I don't know what you even call those two days, right? crash or shut down or process level we're hitting over the last couple of days as layoffs are starting to happen. Yes. And there will be some like my personality is kind of the kind that just gets through it and doesn't really even see things. I'm a trauma triage person. Yeah, and I'm in it and then once we get done, and it's over and everybody else is all excited about going to work then then mine will come right but as sisters we have to be able to embrace each other and and recognize that we do process all that different. And not only that, but whether one sister isn't as concerned as someone else or as sheltered in place. I guess that's shelter in place is the is more out and about or another one is more cautious. There's grace for both right? And instead of bashing each other man, we can do better. We can support each other, encourage each other and walk through different seasons in different times, right? And hopefully we're we do that better than I'm seeing some. You know, like I said earlier in a lot of ways you see a lot of amazing creativity and intentionality coming out and then sometimes, wow, you know, fear can either mask itself as overly confident or as under confident, and just what we're typically used to seeing fear look at look like and even in either one, we have to have grace to come alongside and encourage meet them where they are, right. That's what Jesus did for us. That's what he did for Peter. What you were just talking about. He met Peter right? Worry was right. The typically boisterous Peter now became the overly cautious Peter, right. And Jesus every time put that and just think I didn't even think about that that's just a number of hours between him being overly confident and slicing the soldier's ear off right. And a few hours later, he's the other way and denying haven nosing. Right? Wow, I had never even really write that. But just a number of very brief hours, that Peter goes through all of that, and yet the Lord had grace, calling back to truth, but had grace and love and mercy for both extremes. Well, you know, we were talking in our study this week about the Pharisees and the Sadducees how they, how they were manipulating pilots so much, you know, and pilot saw it. He he recognized it And as we read through each of the Gospels we read, you know, Matthew one day mark one day, Luke one day, john one day, and we've got some other verses about the resurrection and, and all that stuff coming up that we're gonna discuss later on today. And the when we're discussing that I said, you know, the Pharisees and the Sadducees were going to pilot going, you know, he's he's stirring things up and they were pointing at Jesus now all I can think of is, when you point at somebody, you got three fingers pointing back at you, right? So they're pointing at Jesus saying he stirring them up. But in reality, he was stirring their hearts and getting them to see something beyond what the Pharisees and Sadducees were teaching them. That's when they get in trouble. And therefore, oh, come out. They were like our sheep bowls. are not staying in line. Like, we love them to stay in line and they're starting to want to look behind the curtain as they say in the laws, you know. And, you know, I love the part where we read last night, that pilot when he put the plaque over Jesus's head that said, the King of Kings King of the Jews, you know, and they're like, no, it needs to say he claimed to be they were trying to spin it. I said, they're like the media today, you know, they're always trying to spin it to put the right words to get the biggest attention to get this to get the things approved. You know, and, and I'm not out here call on fake media. I'm not doing all that stuff because I have some very good friends that are part of the media that do their due diligence. So you know, I'm not going there. I'm not getting on that bandwagon. But on the other side of and with me being in radio media and podcasting, now I am the media. So, but on the other side of it It is, we need to be cautious of the people around us that are stirring things and pointing to others deflecting to others. We need to have the mindset to look exactly at what is the truth. And the difficult thing right now is in so many ways, no one knows no one knows right? The truth really is except you can always know the truth of Scripture, right and always know the truth for the direction of your life for how to treat others are how to walk through problems, even if you don't know the truth of whatever problem it is you're facing or whatever the disaster for lack of better word, right is. Because anytime you're walking through one you don't know the truth of it until you get all the way through it and see but this is is I mean, this is one that has shaken the world. Yes, rightly or wrongly, and I shake in the world. And I don't think we've seen half. And I don't say that, like pessimistically, I don't think the curtains have been pulled back to see the spiritual ramifications of this as much as anything else. Well, I think we talked a little bit too. And the reason I brought up the Pharisees and the Sadducees, we talked a little bit before we came on the air about we need to be very careful about having a religious spirit during this time. I was in a group the other day and somebody was like, Hey, we're gonna do a call Friday at four, something like that. And somebody on the west coast is like, Well, you know, I'm observing that I'm reading my Bible, because it's Good Friday and the guy goes, well, what's good Friday, you know, and somebody said, Well, for those that are religious, it's a sacred holiday. And let me just tell you, all right, for those of you that don't know me, Well, I have a sassy side. Why are you laughing? Connie? We did I learned it from Connie. No. I did. Well, you asked my husband, he would say you learn from the best, but we didn't mention no throat punches, right. I think that might have given a clue. Right? Right. So, but in that group, when the person said, for religious people, in my right part of my mind, I knew she meant no offense to it. But in my sassy part of my mind, I wanted to say, Well, I'm not religious, but as a Christian, I observe. Yeah. Because to me, there's a difference. There is a difference in being a Christ follower, and full of grace, because what we talk about About earlier with Jesus talking to Peter, he was talking to Peter after Peter had denied him three times. And he was asking Peter, do you love me? And he asked him three times do you love me? Helping Peter rehabilitate his own heart and his own guilt over the denial of Christ. He was having that intimate moment with you. You know how we, we do. We talked about my six six year old grandson, though that you grab them by the face, you put hands on either side of their face to where their cheeks are just squished up just right. And you go Do you understand me? And that I can envision in verbal picture. That's what Jesus was doing with Peter. You know, yes, you've made mistakes. Yes, you are a zealous person. But I want you to be zealous for my people. Yes, big difference. Big difference bead my sheep tend to my sheep. Love My sheep, and being religious about whether or not they're going to church and trusting God for a miracle to heal them and keep them safe and all this. Oh, it's exhausting being self righteous. And you know what's funny is we can all go there so fast because I mean, let's admit it black and white is way easier. You know? It's just easier. It is. And the Sagittarius and Pharisees were very black and white, very legalistic by had it down to a science. But Wow, how they could get it wrong. Right. They could get it wrong. And that just to me, just goes to prove how easy it is to get off track. They knew the word, right. If anybody knew the word they knew the word right? didn't have the spirit. They had the religion in the relationship. And here's the thing that really, really gets me. They knew the word they knew the prophecy. And watching those soldiers go, were to the to on either side of Jesus and breaking their legs, but not breaking Jesus's leg and piercing him in the side instead. You wonder if they're looking at that going, whoa. I think they looked at it and said, Let's fix the mess up our deal. Right? Because at the same about the same time, they're casting the lats. Yeah. to both of those were fulfillment of prophecies by people that were not prophetic people to fill. We're not people of studying of the word, you know. And one of the things I talked early on in the week about was Judas You know, we call him Judas, the trader, but he was the first domino to fall in setting the prophecy emotion. Yeah. Yes, Jesus knew it was all coming. But for it to happen those 30 pieces of silver had to be exchanged. Okay, we don't like to think of a life that includes being broken better and betrayed. Well, that works. Um, yeah, it's a betrayal. Right? You know, and and we get all bent out of shape when it happens to us and prayerfully we're not doing it to others. But yeah, we've got a live on a really, really tough planet to try to walk out and While he promised us he would lead the way and he would never forsake us, he did not promise us that it was going to be a simple walk, or a simple journey and to think that a betrayal was what kicked off. The prophecies is just kind of telling. Well, you know, a friend of mine shared something last night we talked about the, the being laid off of work. You know, there's I've had several friends over the last few days have posted that they've been laid off work and some of them are taking it very well. You know, God's got something better, but some of them are feeling like a betrayal of their employer or the government or even if they work for a friend of theirs, the friend you know, but one of the things that she was a friend of mine Catherine Clift shared was she remembers her husband when he used to do his daily live worship podcasting said that God doesn't demote he promotes and God is always faithful and I was like, What a great reminder to all of us, no matter what we're facing, some of us may be still stuck on Friday still, and and you know, now dealing with the numbness of Saturday, but Sunday is still coming. And, you know, I, one of the things I loved yesterday and reading from john, you know, I, I found something new I liked from each of the Gospels. You know, Luke really was great as well. But john, when he he, we call him the narcissist of the Gospels. Jesus loves the one who Jesus loves, but there's a reason I mean, one of the things that That I found yesterday in the scripture that not really picked up on it said, Well, let me find it. I've got it right here. And I say I've got it right here. And Jesus was looking down is is near the cross of Jesus did his mother, his mother sister marry the wife of colobus cloak, ah, whatever. Sounds good to me, and Mary Magdalene, when Jesus saw his mother there and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her woman, here is your son, into the disciple, here's your mother. From that time on, the disciple took her into his home. Why would why wouldn't john, thank you as the favorite. Jesus just gave him the blessing of his mother and gave john the honor of stewarding Her to the end of her days. Yeah, I would. I would think I was the favorite too, wouldn't you? Well? Yeah. But also, that comes with a price. It does. He was the only disciples still standing around the cross watching all this happened. Right and he loved, right. So, again. Yeah, I mean, look, I'm I'm Jesus's favorite. He loves me best. Right. Will I follow him? Right? On Friday? Well, john 30 right in john finished strong. Yeah, Jesus, and even better question. Survive Friday. Love Saturday. Rejoice on Sunday. What are we going to do with Monday and Tuesday, right. I mean, really, you get through the battle, you survive it. You rejoice and you see the victories and you See what the Lord has done for you? And then what are you going to do go back to how you were living on Wednesday and Thursday? I mean, what are we going to do with it come Monday and Tuesday Are we going to forget about it and just awake earlier, they thought they were at the top of the world. And now their world is totally shattered at their feet. And so good question to all of us. So we've had Coronavirus still do. And I'm not at all downplaying the suffering, whether it's health wise, financially, emotionally, that people are going through, but we will survive it. Right. What are we going to do with it? What are we going to do on Monday, that carries the victory that Jesus paid the price for and that we're going to celebrate on Sunday. What are we going to do on the Monday after Coronavirus? Right, where will our loyalty and our and our walk and our faithfulness be man? Well, and to be quite honest, if you look at the beginning of the 1900s, we had World War One, we had the Spanish flu. We had the Great Depression. We had World War Two, all before 1950. Right? That's a lot to pack into a 50 year period. That's a lot. And so we as Americans, you know, even though we're hurting other countries as well, we as Americans, are countries country has seen difficult times. We have come through difficult times. That's the time known as the greatest generation, right? can't even believe what if now is the beginning of the next greatest generation. It can be they can boo but the choice is ours. What Do we want it to be? One of the things that we talked about? In? I think it was Matthew that just struck me so solidly is when the Jews were saying crucified, Jesus crucified Jesus, and parshas pilot was wanting to wash his hands of it. They were like, his blood is on our hands in the hands of our children. You know, it's, it's apparent the things we do today are the things that our children dream, reap the benefits or the consequences of its Yes, it's just a known fact. So what is it that we what is the legacy we want to live now is blessed the other day to be able to record a message for a conference Coming up for heartbeat international and just a little seven minute kind of like a TED TED Talk. And the topics had been picked way back. I don't know last September, probably. And it's it's so funny how God worked it out because I had submitted a topic for a workshop, but they had asked me to do this talk on a different topic. And they got crossed. And so what they actually did was put in the, all the paper, all the promotional stuff that I was doing my seven minute TED Talk. And it was a different title. And, you know, in my fleshly, I was like, Well, I can make this work. I can make that title work with the message I already know I'm doing. Well, the title of the message was living out a god sized dream and I kept trying to make At work with a message on, I'm just gonna be brutally honest on walking in your authority. Right? Well, you can make the to kind of coincide except when the Lord wants a fresh word, right? And yeah, that you want the cliff notes and he doesn't do that. And so you know, you you kind of go through it. I'm like, Lord, in the middle of everything that's going on. You really want me to speak about living out a god sized dream? Really? Um, I don't really want to be virtual so they can't throw anything at me. So this is a good this is a good thing, right? Um, but he just he took me totally off where we are but took me to Solomon. Hmm. And just you know that he asked for understanding and discernment and judgment and God wrapped it up in a nice sized bow and call it wisdom hmm and said for that I will give you Also wealth and honor. And I kept studying that message him guys don't get it. I mean, a Who am I to ask for a god sized dream in the middle of all this and be? I don't even know what to ask for if I did, right. And I got to I think it's First Kings chapter three got to verse 15. And it says, then Solomon awoke. And I was like, whoa, wait a minute. You go back to verse five, and it says Solomon was in given which is a place he shouldn't have been in darkness at night, which is kind of where a lot of people feel we are right now. Right. And God came to him in a dream. Hmm. So all the things that that we remember that Solomon recounted his lineage of from David and from God's promises and everything that's been sewn into him. We aren't smart enough, right? We aren't good enough. And if we really do want to live out a god sized dream, it really can start now. Right? And it's just having the conversation with God to know what his size dream is yes, because we can't. It's not about us dreaming and dreaming a dream and saying, hey, God, will you please bless this? It's about us. Coming awake, and letting him teach us what he's already sewn into us. You know, whether it's our setup, or our hang ups or whatever it is, he's already sewn it into us. And when God speaks things into us, he sometimes speaks things into us, that you may not even know is a possibility. Yeah, just because in I was thinking about Noah. Yeah, Noah builds an ark, because it's gonna be flooded. And it's never rained on the planet Earth up into that point. I mean, no wonder people were calling him weird and crazy and all sorts of things. But it rain had never fallen on the earth before. And he's building this thing that's supposed to flow. It's supposed to do all this stuff. So God will call you to do things that other people may look at and go, why are you doing that? That's crazy. And chances are if it's a god sized dream, they're going to do that because I find it's a fusions three, three this month 20 says now to him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we can ask. think or imagine Yeah, I can dream up a lot of really cool stuff. But God can do beyond write any of that according to the power that works within us all about His power, His Spirit working through US and US following where he leads in this season, in good season, in difficult season, right. And I guess there's a question for us. It's Friday, Sunday's coming, right. We're kind of on Saturday where it's kind of a still in between. What are we going to do with that time? If we really are supposed to shelter in place and a lot of us are home more and have more time on our hands? What are we doing? I mean, now's when you want to start a god sized dream. Well, you know heard a new partner. I heard a new episode of Tiger kings coming out on Easter Sunday I'm joking. I there is one coming out on Sunday but that's not an endorsement of any twitch that's not an endorsement by any means. I'm just saying you know how many people are more excited about that than the fact that the tomb is empty on Sunday night? Spoiler Yeah, I'm just spoiled it. I've read the book. I've read the ending. Truly, you know if we have a little extra time and you know, I know a lot of your listeners are, love the Lord and are living some amazing, amazing lives and dreams and ways of tuned on enough to to see the different ways they help. their communities and each other. And I mean, just some amazing women on here, just say, what are we doing with this time? What if we really did, let's just call it Saturday. And we spent the season of Saturday letting him awaken us to what he wants to do next. You know, I'm gonna throw my husband under the bus for a minute, just because he's not in here and I can do that. But early on in our marriage, you know, we would say some things like a lot of married couples do. We may say some things that maybe some of us that have been married a while do too, but the ratio Yeah, that's a whole different topic. We need a different expert that we say stuff to each other that we say in the heat of the moment that we wish we could have taken back, because it does cause hurt. It does cause pain. It does cause strife. But there was this phrase that my husband said to me one time early on in our marriage, we're having marital difficulties. And he said, I love you. But I'm not sure I'm in love with you. And that was rough. Don't get me wrong. We've gone to counseling. We've been married 27 years now almost 28 years now. We got over it. He and he is still alive. It's I'm still married to the same husband. You know, but the other part of it was me asking myself on a regular basis. Do I love the Lord or am I in love with the Lord? Because when you love somebody, you're like, Hi, bye. I love you. I mean, I've told the cashier Love you. Bye bye. But when you're in love with somebody, you want to spend time with them. You want to know what makes them happy. You want to do things for them that make them happy. You want to find a way for y'all to live your lives completely together. And that's a huge difference. And where I took offense to Mike saying that to me so many years ago, I'm thankful now that he said that to me, because I've had to dig deep and I've had to ask myself that question, as am I living my life as if I'm in love with Christ? Or am I living it as if I'ma Love you, bye. Oh, sorry, I thought we weren't gonna do any throw punches today. Huge, huge difference, you know, yeah, it's it's a difference in looking for his hand and looking at us face. Just that simple. You sit down to study your word to see what he can do for you. Or you sit down to study His Word to hear his heart, right? And see him face to face it it'll change your life forever. Well, there's there's been times the more and more I get into the word, you know, used to I'd read the word, and I'd write my little journal and put it have a whole lot of my thoughts in that journal. And I was super smart. Yeah, I was good at what I was doing right. But then, the other part of it is what I started realizing was when I was starting to write things in my journal questioning things. Normally it was questioning motives of my heart. It was questioning how willing I was to walk with God how big I was. Willing to dream with him? How if I could discipline myself in this area? Whoo, I hate that word. Discipline myself in this area that he would open up this area for me. You know, and the more disciplined I became, the more the doors were opening. And I'm not talking about religion and law. I'm talking about being disciplined to be more in tune with him in his calling. walking the street in the neighborhood, not as a hooker. Okay, walking the street in my neighborhood. She had died laughing at me right now. Hey, Jesus, loved tokers. Anyway. Oh, yeah, that walk in my neighborhood Street. Even if we're not able to be within the six feet with each other I can still share a smile. I can still share a Hello. I can touch bases with people in my in our Facebook group the other day. We have a neighborhood Facebook group, right? And here's my thing. There is a church song we used to sing. Back in the olden days they don't sing it so much because we think so much contemporary now, you know, in my church, but back I don't even think I've ever sung this in the church I go to now Whoo, that was a rabbit trail anyway. The song you they will know we are Christians by our love. Yep. All right. Well, if you're having intelligence, not by your intelligence, not by me telling you I'm a Christian. Because if you're having to tell me, then I probably wouldn't have never known it from your actions. Not by all the oh they won't know it by all The things we don't do, right? The somebody in our Facebook group post the other day was in our Facebook group for our neighborhood was posting about their next door neighbor. Right? Not one of the neighbors in the almost 300 homes in our neighborhood. Their next door neighbor was mad because their next door neighbor had called city out on them because their trash cans had been in front of their yard and was mad that they had called the police instead of coming over and having the decency to knock on their door and have the conversation and all this stuff on Facebook. So they put it on Facebook and then said in there several times and I'm a Christian and data and all this stuff. I'm like you're making it worse. No, you're a religious person. Please don't. Please, please don't tell anyone that you're a Christian. Just please don't. And then the other part is is we wanted to tell them to will. Couldn't you have gone next door and had the conference They're Christian. They're Christian they they everybody should cater to them. You know, my favorite along those lines, if you talk to any waitress, oh, you're about to push a button here. The the time they hate to wait on tables the most is when the rude people come in after church on Sunday because they're very rude. They're very demanding and they do not tip. No, they leave little pamphlets and little business cards with Jesus loves you on it and they don't tip their server. They're also probably the ones that don't tie the well at church either. I'm just I'm not judging. I'm not judging. I'm just putting it out there. We can do better. We can do better. Because here's the thing. Once the Sunday came, you know, I love it. I keep going back to john because not because it's the freshest But because he was just more in tune with the behind the scenes the things that most people don't talk about his favorite well I relate to him really well because I'm everybody's favorite but but john whenever he runs the team he stops and looks in but in true Peter fashion john notes that Peter grunts straight in all right. So Peters in there John's in there they go back. Mary's telling the other disciples all this stuff by now she seen Jesus she's had a conversation. But you know when she went and talked to Peter and john, she was trembling. She was wondering she was she was upset. It didn't really say she was fearful, but she was upset. But by the time she broke the news to the rest of the disciples, she was elated. She had seen Jesus. I mean, look When you are in a terrifying situation and even now if it's in your spirit, hers was audibly. You hear the Savior call out your name didn't get any better. It calms you instantly. It fires you up instantly. it verifies everything you've ever thought he sewn into you before told you before. And that's all it took was for the man she was in love with the teacher, the Savior she was in love with not just love distance, distant link to just in the craziness of the moment. Call out Mary. Well, I think I think it for me, you know, people like oh, you just like that it was a woman and you're into women empowerment and all that stuff. I said, There is so much more to this than that. I said, here's the thing. Mary had seven demons cast out of her. She had already seen what she thought was impossible become possible. Yes. Who better for Jesus to show himself to somebody who was already primed and ready to see what they believed was once impossible. I mean, how cool is that? I love it. You know, I feel like I'm that person. My husband thinks I'm that person. Which demon am I talking the hangry one. derailed that has lived less than a chosen daughter of the king. has heard his voice call me to himself and has forgiven and redeemed and restored and allowed my place of deepest wounding to become his place to show off what he can do, right? I totally identify with what you just said. Well, we have to take a quick break because you know, they like for the commercials to run here to pay for our radio time slot and all of that. So we're gonna take a quick break and when we come back, we're gonna dive into what happened from Sunday and beyond. Hey, this is Angie Monroe of the warrior Davis show broadcasting live each Tuesday 11am Central from globe life park in Arlington, Texas, login to hear real talk with real women that will empower and equip you to make a more powerful impact in the world each Tuesday 11am Central unfishable Radio Network joke Hey, this is Angie Lehman row of a leading moment show broadcasting live each Thursday 10am Central from the globe life park in Arlington, Texas login to hear amazing people share their stories of resiliency in business and life here how their leading moment can inspire your leading moment login each Thursday 10am Central on fishbowl radio network. All right, and we are back with Connie Wyatt Coleman. And we are having some great conversation. We've talked a little bit about Friday and Saturday and leading up to that, and we've talked a little bit about Sunday. But you know, one of the things that as we were talking about Jesus appearing to marry and then to his decision dipoles a lot of times it would have made more sense if you look at it if he would have gone from today's standard of people gone back and shown himself to the Pharisees the Pharisees the pilot and gone okay keep me coming I don't know we're coming out Oh, we have jumped the shark now. But you know he in my mind that's who I would have shown myself to you thought you could keep me down boom. And a lot of tastes today we see that people in today's society. I was down this is my comeback. I'm you know, you know someone's So said this about me and I defeated that and I have made myself this because of that you had made yourself squat. No self made nothing. I'm a self made man say, I make those all the time. There's a doctor of theology. That friend of mine that had a post up yesterday, and he says, Some of y'all aren't gonna like this. It's Dr. Mike Brown. And I really don't care. He says before I say what needs to be said I acknowledge the sacrifice and work of American people attempting to do all we can do to mitigate the virus. There has been cooperation, sacrifice, adaptation and behavior monitoring. Which are commendable and noteworthy and exemplary. I love my country and its people. Having acknowledged all that, well, here we go again, claiming all our hard work and sacrifices beginning to turn this virus around. just heard on TV how impressive we have been in lowing the projective death tolls. Meanwhile, men and women of God who are battling in the spirit against this calling millions to prayer and sounding trumpet for repentance, a return to the Lord and a humble petition for his deliverance are mocked and castigated. See I can learn big words and lampooned as antiquated, flat earth fools, believers who are praying, fasting and calling out to God or patted on the head like little ignorant trolls that must be tolerated until their kind will eventually be absorbed by the globalist monolith with all of this sublime And superior wisdom say that he's one of my people that writes some big words that I have a hard time with. And so, you know, he's, he says, quit claiming God's glory for ourselves less through our arrogance, we inform him we can handle these problems on our own. Romans 121 through 22, because that when they knew God, they glorified him not as God. Neither were thankful but became vain in their imaginations and their foolish heart was darkened. professing themselves to be wise they became fools. God forgive us remember us in Deliver us. You are refuge in our strong tower forever and ever. Wow. So my, I thought that was I thought that was a good deep word for us. To sit with because, you know, even the disciples could have gone. Have you seen my Jesus? Looky there, he did this and then he was boom, then he was back as well and leave it to Peter he kind of did. Right. Not in those terms, not in his own strength, right. But after Jesus was on earth and after he showed himself to the people and after he transcended that's when that's when Peter walked in and the power and an anointing fell. And I mean, yeah, he was. He might not have done it with the mic drop. Right. But I mean, he did he was like, just an airdrop. Yeah. Jesus Whoo, y'all killed. This is the Jesus who offers you salvation. Right? This is the Jesus who offers you eternal life. And Spirit had opened up and people could hear truth and understand truth and the huge movement of people coming to understand who Jesus was, and what he was here to do. Just exploded. Well, you know, so what are we going to do after Sunday? Well, first off, we we need to not be like Thomas. Poor Thomas. You know, he was the one that because he hadn't been there and seen Jesus when everybody else did. He he had to touching him and poke his hand into his side and all that stuff. Believe. It doesn't say any of the other disciples did that. So Thomas was a bit morbid we know that. But when when we did this, you know, I love that Jesus without saying he was omnipresent, showed he was omnipresent in this because if Jesus had come back and said, john called me and told me that you were doubting me and who I am, then Jesus would have said it there because john would have written it down. But Jesus didn't say that. Jesus came in and said, Peace be with you then said to Thomas, Put your finger here. He was laying Thomas that he already knew what Thomas needed to believe. We did. He didn't have to articulate that to Jesus. Jesus already knew. And guess what? He knows what each one of us need. Well, okay, so we're going to talk about Christian versus religious again. If I put out on Facebook or in a group that I have an unspoken prayer requests then if somebody it then I somebody comes to me and tells me that they can't pray for me because they don't know what what I need prayer for because it's unspoken. Why are you trying not to lab that that that they need to know what I need prayer for so they can specifically proof to God for me. She's got this look on her face to people like she's trying to choke back. Tears of laughter I'm waiting for how you responded. I'm sure I'm sure that wasn't one of those that I held back on the keyboard once. But basically, somebody had shared in one of our groups that someone so needed prayer, no, I shared that someone so needed prayer, please pray for her. And they came back and, and it was like three comments of you need to tell us what's wrong so we can pray the right way and ask the Holy Spirit to intervene, intervene the right way, and dah, dah, dah. It was just like boom, boom, boom, boom. And mine was very short and to the point, when more through better, we can do better. She keeps a weekend. I mean, let's be honest, spiritual abuse takes all forms. It can be sassy or ferrocene. smacking somebody over the head with a Bible verse instead of meeting them where they are, and loving them and loving them to a new level. And ladies, let's just say it, it can be women who mask prayer, as gossip beauty shop for your circles. Yeah. God does not need you to know the details in order to sit down and say, Dear Heavenly Father, Jesus help my friend. They need you. They're crying out to you, you know what they need? And I know you're able. Right? Amen. Right. I don't need another detail. There is nothing about my prayers that can really do it. It's just us petitioning together. Let's take it a step further. So obedience, if you need to know the details, the Holy Spirit is able to quicken your heart on what to pray for, right? You don't have to, you just don't have to write I can't tell you how many times that I have heard prayer meetings, turned into gossip sessions because we cannot just simply say hey, so and so nice. Prayer. In order for people to really truly pray fervently, we think they need to know the detail that you know, because her husband this and her daughter that and her son did the other end, right. That's a failure on Christians, brothers and sisters, to take prayer requests to the Lord seriously. And it's a failure on our part to abuse each other. With gossip when there's no need for it if we're truly relying on the spirit to pray. Sorry, you just hit a nerve. I cannot stand it. Well, you know, last year it's interesting. We're coming up on a year since my friend Kim passed away, and on the wee morning hours of a April 18. I woke up in the middle of the night, my husband and son were up in Arkansas with my parents and woke up in the wee mornings of the night and I wrote a letter to her in in Facebook Messenger, just letting her know how much I loved her how much I cared for how much you know, I didn't. I didn't know where she was in her medical crisis at that time to if she was even reading things or not. And I went back to sleep. After I wrote that letter. It took me a while to go back to sleep, but I basically cried myself to sleep that night after writing that letter. And I woke up the next morning, and there was a post on her page. That said, Please pray for my family. I had not verbally talked with my friend in weeks But I knew that day from that post on her and what God had started my spirit overnight that my friend was soon to answer death's door. I knew it. I didn't have to have her pick up the phone and call me. I didn't have to have her daughter pick up the phone and call me. I didn't have to get a text. I didn't have to get a detail about how the body had ravaged her system. The chemo had ravaged her system so much and done it. I didn't mean any of that. You didn't have to comment on the Facebook post inside tell us what's going on? No, no, no, you know, I didn't have to do that either. All I had to do basically about the time I saw that post, my husband called from Arkansas to tell me that we had lost another loved one in Ohio. That was our third death then since January and on his side of the family. He's trying to talk to me. As he's talking to me, he can notice that my voice ain't right. And I could just go, I said, I have this sense that Kim is dying. And he's like, Well, what do you know? I'm like, that she's dying. And he goes out of you know, that. I'm like, it's just a sense, you know? And it was just and she was the one that pushed me and challenged me and never wanted me to hang back to what she was called to, but she wanted to be involved into what we were doing. Yes. Right. And so, being in tune with her brought me in tune with God. being in tune with God brought me in tune with her. Last week. God I post, from a cousin in Georgia saw posts from a cousin in Georgia. Just saw one of the kids posted, please pray for my family. Instantly I knew what had happened. Before my husband even got confirmation of what had happened. I instantly knew because I'm connected with that mom. And we have shared our hearts with each other. And were to share each other's hearts. The Holy Spirit intervenes to communicate in ways between us that when we don't have the strength or the energy to pick up the phone and make the call, the Holy Spirit can say, hey, you need to text them. You need to call them you need to check on them. When you find that true, yeah. Some of us are better at doing it. I mean, I just yesterday I mean, I considering my older brother, right? And he posts to Facebook almost every morning. And I saw it yesterday morning. He had posted it Wednesday. But I just saw it. And I mean in the first three or four words, I could hear in his voice that something wasn't right. Right. And he was he was absolutely transparent on the post just that it had been a rough day and he's, you know, walking through this and a pastor friend had passed away, but there was just something deeper, it felt like, again, to your point, I know his heart, right. And so I just text shot him a text real quick. And I'm like, Look, I know, I know you're trying to navigate all of this and blah, blah, blah, and just know in this moment, right now. I'm praying strength for you. And I almost he texted me back He said, You know, when I posted that yesterday I had this, just this feeling just this over, was overcome with it. He's a little did I know, by 10 o'clock last night, or the night that he posted that deal, but 10 o'clock that mind. His father passed away. Oh my goodness, he got the call. He was able to get there and he had about an hour with his father. But that he didn't he didn't have to ask outside of that post. Say Anything else was going on? I had no clue his dad had been sick again. Right. But I just knew after hearing his voice that he needed encouragement Hmm, I had no clue anything else that had transpired. Didn't need to know right. The need to know just needed to know that I was reaching out for him. So can do what do we do after Sunday? Yeah. We live life with people. And when God put somebody on your heart, follow up with it, right or no follow up. I, I can't tell you personally, how many times you know, I've told you 100 times I thought before I took this job that I knew what spiritual warfare was, I thought I was prepared. I had no No, no, no clue, no clue. And there have been many times, just online that it's not something that people ask for prayer for necessarily, it's not something that you would ever put on Facebook, but just the, the battles that come and God has quickened to other people's spirits, right to to call or just to send it, send a text or, hey, you want to go have coffee, you know, just any little thing but somewhere along the way, the Holy Spirit put me on other people's hearts. When I needed it, and they didn't need details, probably didn't even share details when we went to coffee. Right? Not with a lot of them. But some of them just Hey, you just crossed my mind. I want you to know, you know, I love you keep going strong. Well, and, and here's the other thing that you have to realize even Jesus had tears to His disciples. He took his disciples within places. He taught lessons that they were all able to hear and do. But even when he went to have certain moments with disciples, there are some that were closer to him than others, that he confided in more so than others. And that's okay, too. Yeah. You don't have to tell everybody everything that's going on. You know, you shouldn't and Connie's one of those people that knows a lot of what goes on with If she doesn't know it right away, she'll know it at some point when we have a discussion. And, and I'm hoping that I always hope that I'm that friend to my friends whenever I'm doing that as well, that they feel that they can speak and open their hearts to me and tell me anything. And it will not shock me it will not hurt me it will not push me away. And that I will not think that they are less than a Christian. I will just love them as Christ loved them. You know, and, and we need to be that friend to others. I know. One of the ways the Lord has done that, for me is just for several. I don't even remember when he really put it on my heart but somebody was going through a trial and you know, just letting them know I'm there letting them know I'm there. I don't you know what, I'm available to you whenever you need me. You don't have to tell me a thing. You don't have to tell me what's going on. just text me the word Jesus, and I will know immediately, right? That you need prayer that you need me to intercede in your behalf and you need me to stand in the gap or stand strong with you. Hmm. And that's all I need to know. That's it text me the name Jesus. Right. And I have some friends that that take me up on. Right. And I'm thankful because I have friends that man, I can just sit and pray, please pray. And that's where the power is. Because, look, here's the truth when when we're in the middle of a battle, right? We may think we know what our prayer need is. Chances are just like right now, we don't know truth. We don't know truth of situation that we're in right now. And when we're in the middle of a battle, a lot of times we can see pieces and parts but we can't pull ourselves out. Have it far enough to see the big picture, right? And if I'm telling someone what to pray, instead of allowing the Holy Spirit to tell them what to pray, hmm, if they're praying for what I want them to pray for, that may or may not be what I need, it may or may not be what the Lord has for me. So if I truly want people to pray where the need is, I'll leave that up to the Holy Spirit as much as possible. You know, as you're talking about that, I started thinking about the movie, tornado, you know, cuz, and there's a reason for it when you're in the middle of the tornado. When they were they were driving into the storm to get the data from the storm twister. twister. That's what's called twister. Yeah, Helen Hunt. Yeah, she dropped, they dropped their driving in there to get all that data out of it. But to drive in there, they had to have the other one stay back to be able to tell where the tornado was going and where Their exit route was too close because they were too close and, and you know, even being in the truck, she's like cow, another cow. He says, I think that's the same cow. Because at that point, they just didn't know what direction was the right direction out and, and there's been times where I've been in the thick of it and I'm like, I don't even know how to pray for me, right? I just don't even know what I need right now. Sleep, sleep would be nice. When when Ali had the twins and we were all here. It was like Sleep, sleep would be nice, but you know. But then there have been unexpected blessings that have happened because what happens when you just say I just need you to pray and you don't give guidance to what you need prayer for. The Holy Spirit supernaturally opens. have so much more than you could ever imagine because you've opened your receiver up to receive more than you ever hoped was possible. Just kind of who he is. Isn't that awesome? Our God is a great God. My dad, he's kind of cool. Yo, I'm also loved that. After Sunday, the apostles went fishing. Yeah, they went right back to living their lives. I did. Not the same. They were forever changed and, and yes, Jesus showed up and did the miracles of the fish. And then like they said he in that I love me. Do you love me, Peter, do you love me? He was reinstating Jesus. Jesus was reinstating Peter at that point he was he was getting Peter to realize his role and his purpose in being the rock the foundation that the church was going to be built on. That Yes, you may stumble and Ball. But there's still grace. You're still love your there's still like place for you. And how many of us have stumbled and fallen in life? I know I have many times more than three. More than more than more than three. But you know, I love that too because he Do you love me? Yes, Lord, right Feed my sheep. Right? Feed my sheep. It's not about you, right? It's about others. But the whole scenario is, well, Jesus, cook them breakfast, hmm. And then told Peter to feed his sheep. We can't give what we don't have. Right. The Lord feeds us so that we can feed others. It's not about us. It's not about promoting us. It's not about a platform for us. It's about the Lord sowing into us what he has for us To live in us and through us, and then us beating others with that. Because if you're not spending time with the Lord and you're not in His Word, then I can say, hey, Angie, you know I'm rooting for you, all day long. I can share my great intellect, intellect with you. Be slim pickins more than one. What do I have that really offers you any hope? one thing and one thing only the love of Jesus Christ, right? He says it into me so that I can sell it into others into story. And that's just what did he win over death hell in the grave to do to feed us? Right so that we can feed others. But that's what the whole that's what living on a god sized dream is about. Right. It's it's not about us. It's never about us. It's always, always about sowing life into others. Always. Well, and, you know, when he's telling them wait, we joked all week there's so quit hoarding the toilet paper. It's all about it's not God, toilet paper. Sorry. But, you know everybody talking about spraying and praying but are they really pray in the Lysol spray and pray, spray and pray that you know, we make fun of the disciples being told so many times we talked about that earlier. But we've already talked about how we've been told multiple times, but when he goes in, he talks to the disciples and He presents himself to the disciples. And then he presents himself to Thomas he goes in there because you have seen me you have believed Blessed are those who have not seen any Yeah, believe me, and believe, you know, here's the thing. They had something a gift, john 316, you have a gift that I'm giving you, you know, my only beloved son. This is a big love gift I'm giving you It's better than a diamond ring girls. And I'm giving you this gift. Enjoy your time with him. feed off of your time with him absorb from him as much as you possibly can. Because you have no idea the legacy that your involvement in these three years with my son is going to have. I mean, they couldn't even grasp the fact that he was going to come back from the dead. Could you think they would be able to grasp that 2000 years later we would be sitting here talking about him. And then the most favorite one of all Yeah. And the Doubting Thomas. I mean, no, who would have thought it? No. And we're in a microwave society. Now we don't think about that either. No, we don't think that the decisions that I make today affect my children. We might think that far. But we don't even can't even fathom what the Lord has passed us because of us. Right, if we will surrender to what he's calling us to do. All right. You know, Kim Slater had her surgery and beginning of January, and she has had an opportunity to look internally both physically and spiritually During this journey, and I saw her on that podcast the other day, yeah, she is. With God's help she is slaying it. Oh yeah, she is she's doing amazing she, she has God gave her the word of the year this year as restart. And that was before January one came around in January 2 she had her open heart surgery right. And when I went and saw her The day after she came home from the hospital, she has a heart shaped pillow. And on there, the doctor drew it has the it's a heart like a Valentine heart shape. heart but it has a picture of a heart medical wise on there. It's what she could use to hold up against the wrists incision when she went to cough because it was going to be painful, right. But on there, the doctor drew and showed her what he had done internally on her So she could see scientifically what was done physically inside of her to open up her, her get blood flowing better. And it was amazing. The day after her surgery days after her surgery, just the color that was back in her that hadn't been there in years he didn't know. And just not knowing how bad she was until it happened. But with that change, it's had overflow effect. She has lost weight. She has started eating healthier, making healthier choices, learning about how to fuel her body the right way, learning that she actually likes to exercise. She doesn't like getting started. But once she started she actually likes it. You know, so she can just get past that little bump of starting. It's like me riding the bike with a stun the other A Day in the neighborhood. We go to one driveway, and he'd stopped so I'd have to stop my bike. And he was taking arrest like a six yea

“The works that the Father gave me to accomplish, these works that I perform testify on my behalf that the Father has sent me.”  John 5:36The works performed by Jesus offer testimony to His mission given Him by the Father in Heaven.  Understanding this will help us to embrace our own mission in life.First of all, let’s look at the fact that Jesus’ works offered testimony.  In other words, His works spoke a message to others about who He was.  The witness of His actions revealed His very essence and His union with the will of the Father.So this begs the question, “Which works offered this testimony?”  One might immediately conclude that the works Jesus was speaking of were His miracles.  When people witnessed the miracles He performed they would have been convinced that He was sent from the Father in Heaven.  Right? Not really.  The fact of the matter is that there were many who saw Jesus perform miracles and remained stubborn, refusing to accept His miracles as proof of His divinity. Though His miracles were extraordinary and were signs to those who were willing to believe, the most profound “work” that He performed was that of His humble and genuine love.  Jesus was genuine, honest and pure of heart.  He exuded every virtue one could have.  Therefore, the testimony that His ordinary actions of love, care, concern and teaching gave were what would have won over many hearts first and foremost.  In fact, for those who were open, His miracles were, in a sense, only icing on the cake.  The “cake” was His genuine presence revealing the mercy of the Father.You cannot perform miracles from God (unless you were given an extraordinary charism to do so), but you can act as a witness to the Truth and share the Heart of the Father in Heaven if you humbly seek to be pure of heart and allow the Heart of the Father in Heaven to shine through you in your daily actions.  Even the smallest action of genuine love speaks volumes to others. Reflect, today, upon your call to give testimony to the Father in Heaven.  You are called to share the love of the Father with everyone you meet.  If you embrace this mission, in great and small ways, the Gospel will be made manifest to others through you, and the will of the Father will be more fully accomplished in our world.Lord, I pray that I act as a witness to the love flowing from Your Heart.  Give me the grace to be real, genuine and sincere.  Help me to become a pure instrument of Your merciful Heart so that all my works will give testimony to Your mercy.  Jesus, I trust in You.Source of content: catholic-daily-reflections.comCopyright © 2020 My Catholic Life! Inc. All rights reserved. Used with permission via RSS feed.

People are preparing for the chance of being put into self-isolation. Which means stocking up on at least 14-days of supplies! You’ve got 3 years’ worth of toilet paper, now how are your cupboards looking? If “Cream of Mustard” soup sounds good to you … you’ve stumbled upon the PERFECT podcast. What’s your FAV go-to canned food item? How is COVID-19 affecting your daily life? Have you cancelled any trips? Are you working from home? We need your creativity now to look at what’s positive around us! March Break….and you’re home with your entire family, which is great, RIGHT? Not a lot of places to go, not a lot of places you should be going right now. What are some fun things to do with the whole family on spring break at home?

BE SURE TO SEE THE SHOWNOTES AND LISTEN TO THIS EPISODE HERE. Eve: Hi there. Thanks so much for joining me today for the latest episode of Impact Real Estate Investing.   Eve: [00:00:06] My guest today is Brian Gaudio, founder of Module Housing. While working on a documentary about the housing crisis in South America, Brian, then just a college senior, saw the broader possibility of modular pay-as-you-go design. As opposed to simply designing yet another prototype for affordable housing, he decided to create a startup around it. And so Module focuses on perfect little housing solutions that meet zero-energy standards, and are smaller and flexible, so that they can grow with a family's needs.   Eve: [00:00:53] Be sure to go to EvePicker.com to find out more about Brian on the show notes page for this episode. And be sure to sign up for my newsletter so you can access information about impact real estate investing, and get the latest news about the exciting projects on my crowdfunding platform, Small Change.     Eve: [00:01:9] Hi, Brian. Thanks for joining me today.   Brian Gaudio: [00:01:24] Hi Eve, thanks for having me.   Eve: [00:01:29] It's a pleasure. So, I've been watching you build your company, Module, for a few years now, and I'm really excited to talk to you about it. You've decided to focus your life's work on designing modular housing, affordable-by-design housing. And that was a pretty bold move straight out of school. So, what problem are you trying to solve?   Brian: [00:01:47] It is a big problem. And it's a problem that, in school I was always, you know, in studios I would always be thinking about. It was something that was rattling in the back of my head, was how do we bring good design to more people, right? In architecture school we're often told how important design is. And then we get out in the real world and we realize how the designers need to have a larger seat at the table. So, in my work after school, it was always trying to answer that question of how can we bring good design to more people. And there may be non-traditional ways to do that, is what I've been learning.   Eve: [00:02:20] That was the biggest problem. But I think I also read that you became very interested in affordable housing issues during your Fulbright Fellowship. You want to tell us a little bit about that?   Brian: [00:02:30] Yes. In school I actually was studying under one of the fathers of community design and participatory design, Henry Sanoff. He had founded an organization called the EDRA, the Environmental Design Research Association. So, I was sort of a student of his and a student of Brian Bell, who had started the Public Interest Design Institute, in the United States. So, it was really learning from folks who were leaders in the public interest design space. So, after school, I tried to pursue that as a career and worked at the Gulf Coast Community Design Studio doing affordable housing and disaster recovery housing, as an intern there. For those who don't know, Biloxi, Mississippi, on the Gulf Coast, is not too far from New Orleans. And when Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans, it also hit Biloxi. So, I spent a little bit of time on affordable housing in Biloxi, Mississippi. And then, also, after that, went to the Dominican Republic and did a Fulbright scholarship trying to understand housing affordability as it relates to disaster recovery and urban design, in general. I was working in a neighborhood that was alongside of the, a waterway that during some of the tropical storms, people would be washed away, and housing would be wiped away.   Eve: [00:03:49] Hmm, wow.   Brian: [00:03:50] So, that research was really thinking about housing from the perspective of, where is it safe to have people housed? And what do you do when a neighborhood exists in a place that is really at risk, when we think about environmental and natural disasters? So, that was some of the kind of affordable housing work and research I was doing right out of school.   Eve: [00:04:15] That's pretty intense work. So, how does that tie into what you're doing today? I mean, what got you from there to where you are today, building small modular homes.   Brian: [00:04:28] Being exposed to these different methods of practice ... so, in Biloxi, Mississippi, I was working for a nonprofit architecture firm that was an arm of Mississippi State University. So, I was exposed to this business model of a nonprofit architecture firm. And then at the Fulbright, it was really a bit more of an academic endeavor. Technically, the Fulbright's under the U.S. Department of State, but you work with the local university. So, again, thinking about some of these issues from a, an academic perspective, I would call it. And then after that, I had spent a little bit of time with a friend directing a documentary, again, trying to educate ourselves on the problem of housing affordability. So, in that documentary, we interviewed a lot of architects, governments, designers, businesses about the housing crisis in other countries, specifically in South America. And it was in this kind of three, four years or so of, I would call it, a research phase, of understanding what are the practices and models that other organizations and groups are taking as it relates to housing affordability and what things worked from those models and what things didn't work. And I guess how that ties into Module, what we're doing today was, while these nonprofit architecture centers, these design centers, can work really well at a neighborhood scale, the question I always had was how can we move beyond the neighborhood scale and effect change at a greater scale? You know, at the city scale, and at the state scale, and eventually at the scale of a, you know, a country like the United States? How do we take some of those principles that worked really well at the neighborhood scale, but may not be able to affect thousands of people?That's really why we chose to start Module, not as an architecture practice, but as a startup company. The idea being that you could scale faster through alternative capital means and have ultimately a greater impact once we do reach that scale. So, that's kind of how those experiences influenced starting Module.   Eve: [00:06:29] That's a really interesting path. I know you also were a company in Alphalab, which is a, I suppose, a startup accelerator. Has that worked for you, as a startup company, rather than a building company?   Brian: [00:06:44] Yeah, it's a very good question because we went through, so you are referring to Alphalab and for those who are not in Pittsburgh, Alphalab is a startup accelerator, kind of like TechStars or Y Combinator, where they give early stage companies, basically folks with an idea and maybe a business plan, some initial seed capital, typically 50,000 dollars and some free office space and mentorship, to basically start to try to build their own business. A lot of the businesses in that accelerator program were tech businesses. So, think about software as a service company, SaaS companies like Slack, for example, you know, being the typical type of company that's supported by an accelerator. So, I think we learned a lot about asking questions and testing our hypothesis through that accelerator program. And we were able to raise some initial angel capital, I would call it, in the Pittsburgh startup community and get our name out there and, you know, learn how to market, create a website and things like that. I think we also learned that as we look at investors and ways to support our business, you know, a typical venture capital investor is not likely the right kind of investor for a company like Module because they look to 10x their money in five years, which, we're building a different kind of business than that. So, those are some of the things we learned from Alphalab.   Eve: [00:07:06] Yeah, interesting. So, you don't think you're a unicorn, like the rest of us, right?   Brian: [00:07:07] Right. No. Not in the traditional sense, no.   Eve: [00:07:18] So, what distinguishes your product, your modular housing products, from other products in the marketplace.   Brian: [00:08:26] So, as we think about off-site construction, modular housing, prefab construction, there are many companies now who are pursuing this as a business model. And I think we identify with the overall trend. The reason why so many people are pursuing modular or prefab construction is the labor shortage is getting worse and worse. And Eve, I know in your business, you're doing a lot of development. So, I'm sure you're familiar with the shortage of qualified skilled labor here in Pittsburgh. But at a national scale, we have that challenge. So, the labor shortage is real. And then we have a supply shortage, as well, in certain markets. So, they can't build things fast enough. And so that's really why prefab or off-site construction has started to take off. So, parts of the home or the development are built in a factory environment, shipped to site, installed with a crane on a traditional foundation. So, as we think about our company, Module, and what differentiates us, we are really thinking about the entire customer experience. So, we're offering turnkey design-build-develop services. So, we're not a manufacturer of homes. We work with a third-party manufacturer and we work with a third-party contractor. So, we don't own those parts of the supply chain. But what we do own is the customer experience. And we're trying to really redesign the customer experience, and redesign homeownership from the ground up, because we think the typical way that the top ten voters in the country do it are very dated. The floorplans they are using are dated, the construction methods that they're using are dated often times. And today's consumer is used to the convenience of making purchases online and browsing of things online. And they want things now, and they want help. A lot of customers expect to have, kind of the user experience that they go through purchasing a computer or something, in all of the purchases in their lives. And not many builders can offer that experience. So, I'd say that's one thing that's really unique about us as a company is the customer experience that we're building through our web application. If you go to our website ModuleHousing.com, you can see some of that. That's one thing that's unique about our product. I would say the other thing is all of our homes are certified by the U.S. Department of Energy as zero energy-ready. We build to that spec. It's a sustainability spec. And we chose it because we believe it offers the best bang for your buck as we think about customers. So, while LEED and Passive House may be, sometimes those certification programs can be really challenging and costly to do. We feel that the Zero Energy Ready Home program offers some of the benefits of lower operating costs in your house at a much more reasonable price point.   Eve: [00:011:11] So, it's an energy program for everyday people.   Brian: [00:11:15] Mmm hmm. Exactly.   Eve: [00:11:16] Yeah, interesting. What is your process? Can you describe that?   Brian: [00:11:19] Yes. So, we work with, I'll call it, several types of customers. We work with individual home buyers. So, folks who want to purchase one of our homes or build a home with us. And then we will also work with real estate investors or mom-and-pop developers, I'll call it. So, these are folks who may have purchased land recently. They may have fixed up some houses or have some rental units, but they're not a new construction contractor. But they own land and they're looking to do something with it. We service, I'll call it, mom-and-pop developers and home buyers. And we'll do two types of processes. One is, if you're a home buyer, you come to our website and you fill out a form on our website. And on that form you'll share here's my current needs, my future needs, my financial health, and here's some of the areas that I'm thinking about owning a home in the city of Pittsburgh. And we have a proprietary GIS database of every vacant lot in Allegheny County. We're able to basically help that customer find the right lot for them, help them purchase that lot, and then help them build a home with us. So, we'll take them through the process from zoning approval, permitting, financing, estimating, and we will basically hold their hand through the process, through construction administration, until we've turned over the keys to their house. So that's really a turnkey service that we offer. And then, the other type of process we have is as a developer. So, we as a developer on spec, will go out and purchase land and build multiple units at once and then sell those units to customers. We're working on a project right now in Garfield, in Pittsburgh, where we are building four units, it's a mixed-income project, and we'll be selling those, those will be on the market, those will be finished this summer. And that's where we are going out as a company, acquiring the land, financing the project, and then customers will come in and have a traditional mortgage when they purchase the homes.   Eve: [00:13:12] And as these homes affordable compared to others? Where they sit in the marketplace?   Brian: [00:13:19] We will build for multiple income brackets. For instance, this project in Garfield is a good example, where we have a home that will be sold to a buyer making 80 percent or less of area median income. So, that home will be sold for 183,000 dollars. I believe that's the list price right now. And that's only for income-qualified buyers, who meet certain income limits. And we're able to do that because we had partnered with a nonprofit community development group in the neighborhood and Urban Redevelopment Authority of Pittsburgh, and we were able to secure a subsidy to subsidize the cost of that home to a buyer in the neighborhood. So, in that case, we're serving a kind of, for sale, affordable, 80-percent AMI customer. But our bread and butter products, our market rate product is going to be anywhere from the mid-threes to 500,000 dollars for a home. And to give listeners some context, as we track the new construction in the city of Pittsburgh, a lot of the new construction that's going up in the East End of Pittsburgh is going to be 600 to 800,000 dollars. So, that's kind of the going rate for a new construction builder-grade home in the East End of Pittsburgh. And because we're building less square footage and we're building, basically, in neighborhoods just next door to those, we're able to provide what we believe is a better quality product at a price point, let's call it the 400,000 dollar range, for our client.   Eve: [00:14:53] That's somewhat affordable, and partnerships to really create serious affordability. But like everything else we've heard and know, it's very difficult to build truly affordable housing without subsidies, if not impossible. This is another example of it. You really need a subsidy to make that work, right?   Brian: [00:15:11] Absolutely. I think coming out of school and you're thinking, you know, as I am thinking about myself graduating from school, I'd be like, wow, you know, we can design anything and we'll find a way to make naturally-occurring affordable housing with just great design. Then you realize affordable housing is really about financing, you know, and the capital stack. So, that's one lesson we've learned over the past four years.   Eve: [00:15:33] Yes. And so you've been at this for four years. How many houses have you built now?   Brian: [00:15:38] So we've finished our first home for a customer last year, in 2019. It was a one bedroom, one bathroom home in Friendship. It was sort of an aging-in-place model. We built it for a clients' parents. So, almost like an in-law suite, or an accessory dwelling unit, but on a separate property. That project is finished and we are now under construction to complete our next four homes. And those should finish in the summer of this year. And we have some other projects in the pipeline.   Eve: [00:16:08] What's the big hairy goal for Module?   Brian: [00:16:12] The big goal is really to push the industry. I feel that the way we build homes is dated. From the types of design, to the types of families and household types that a lot builders are serving. We want to push the construction industry to really wake up and understand that there are different types of customers who need to be served and we're ignoring those customers. So, I think that's really the goal. Module is a  vehicle to do that. So, as we think about the young first-time homebuyers who are burdened with student loan debt, getting married later, fewer kids, they don't need to buy the homes that their parents bought in terms of size and programming and things like that. So, we're trying to push the industry to say, hey, there's a huge entry level housing need in the country. And there's also a huge need for baby boomers who are looking to downsize, and they have too much house. And we need to be thinking about these two customer types, because they're going to be a huge component of the nation's housing needs. That's really the ultimate goal for Module, is how can we push the industry forward and provide a demonstration of how a development company can do that responsibly, really.   Eve: [00:17:22] What are your goals just for the next few years? You've built a few houses.   Brian: [00:17:26] Yeh.   Eve: [00:17:26] How quickly can you ramp up now? I know how long it takes to get to the point where you get the first one out the door, so now things should speed up a little, right?   Brian: [00:17:35] That's right. Our goal, we talk about 100 units over the next four years, in Pittsburgh. So, that's the goal that we've set out. And so for us to do that, we have to start taking on larger projects. So, I'm looking at parts of the city where we can do, I'll call it, impact-scale projects, thinking 20 to 40 units and working with the local neighborhood groups to understand what their needs are and how we can serve them. So, we'll be finished our first spec project in this summer and we're looking at projects where we can build 10 or more units. And that's really what will help us scale faster. We'll do some of these one-off customers, you know, taking them through the process, just sort of, it's about brand awareness and it's about understanding the customer journey. But really, we want to be working on projects where we can assemble sites that build 10 or more units at once.   Eve: [00:18:25] And you think you're going to stay in Pittsburgh for now.   Brian: [00:18:28] Yes, we will. Obviously, to build thousands of homes, we're gonna have to get outside of Pittsburgh. But Pittsburgh will be the first market. It's my hometown. I'm from here originally. And so, we thought it was a worthwhile test market. And what Pittsburgh has some other cities don't, is we have an insane amount of vacant land that is yet to be built.   Eve: [00:18:59] We really do, don't we?   Brian: [00:19:00] That's one asset that we have. So.   Eve: [00:19:01] Yes. Yeah.   Brian: [00:19:05] And that's one reason why, getting getting projects off the ground, you know, if we were in New York, for instance, getting access to land as an upstart developer might be nearly impossible. And so, there are still parts of the city of Pittsburgh where there are larger parcels of land, and we see that as one benefit of being in Pittsburgh.   Eve: [00:19:14] Great. So, I'm going to shift gears a bit and just talk to you about impact investing, socially responsible real estate. And do you think that's necessary in today's development landscape, thinking about the impact of what you build?   Brian: [00:19:28] Absolutely. I think, and one reason, kind of when you talk about a goal of our company or a reason that we were founded, is we feel that often times what gets built in a particular site may be really great for the bottom line of a particular limited partner or, for the preferred return of a particular investor. But that becomes the primary goal of the project. And the folks who end up living in the space, whether they're buying it or renting it, are an afterthought. And I'm not saying that's, by no means are all developers that way, but we've seen a lot of development projects that really ignore the end user. And I think why I'm excited about impact real estate investing is the ability to bring the end user back to the forefront of the conversation, because we build housing ultimately to shelter people. And I think sometimes people in this industry lose sight of that. So, I think impact investing has the ability to bring the end user back to the forefront of the conversation.   Eve: [00:20:33] Yeah. You know, when you talk about that, are there any current trends in real estate that excite you or interest you the most, that you think might have legs in the future?   Brian: [00:20:43] Trends with respect to impact investing, or just trends in general?   Eve: [00:20:46] Anything, I mean, obviously you think modular housing is important. But anything else out there? I've been watching, we've seen co-working, for example, really change the landscape. Today, I was reading along those lines about people who are starting to co-purchase homes because they can't ...   Brian: [00:21:07] Yeah.   Eve: [00:21:07] ... they can't afford them individually. So, there are some weird trends emerging in an effort to deal with this housing affordability crisis.   Brian: [00:21:17] Absolutely. Speaking of those trends, I mean, we operate in the startup world, so we do meet a lot of startup companies working on innovative finance models. And there's a company called Divy, which again, sort of supports co-purchasing of homes. And that's a company, you can look up Divy. And there's another company called CoBuy. So, these are finance companies which help either friends or folks who want to purchase a house together. So, that's one model. There's been a couple other startups as it relates to purchasing of homes where they will buy the house for you and you will rent from them for a certain period of time, and then with the option to purchase. I don't remember the name of the company that I was reading about the other day, but that's another interesting finance play. And then, I follow, obviously, these smaller, you know, lot size movement. So, with what's happening, California with ADUs really interests me. And then I think it was Minneapolis that out with the single family zoning restrictions ...   Brian: [00:22:19] Yeah, that was really interesting. Yeah, they're really interesting trends, aren't they? People sort of really adapt to the marketplace in really fascinating ways, beyond just the companies that emerge. People are immensely creative. So. that's kind of comforting, isn't it?   Brian: [00:22:36] Yeah, absolutely. There's a company that's working on 3D printing of houses, which I am a bit skeptical, I admit, I'm a little bit skeptical of. But I think it's amazing that we have, now, three or four startup companies that are 3D printing homes. I think of it as a fascinating R&D project. I'm not sure how commercially viable that technology is. But the idea that, you know, it sort of get to the same pain point of modular construction with regards to the labor force.   Eve: [00:23:06] Yeah. I mean, I think ...   Brian: [00:23:07] Preprinting the home, that could really save some labor costs.   Eve: [00:22:12] Yeah. I mean, that seems to be the heart of it all. Because when you think about affordable housing, there's always been the skeptics. It doesn't really matter what city or state you're in. There is a gap between the cost of building something and what someone can afford to pay towards that cost. There's just this financing gap. And until we figure out new technologies in construction and ways to reduce the cost of construction, that gap just isn't going to disappear. It's not going to go away.  I don't see that there's any other way to make it go away. It's a really big problem. Yeah, it's a really big problem. How do you think we need to think about our cities and neighborhoods so we can build better places for everyone?   Brian: [00:23:59] As I think about a neighborhood and a city, sometimes neighborhoods are microcosms of the city. So, for instance, we're working on a project in Garfield, which is, sits in the East End of Pittsburgh. And Garfield was a neighborhood that still has a significant amount of vacant property and blighted properties. But it's a neighborhood that's starting to turn the corner.   Eve: [00:25:26] A few years ago, like, 400 of the 1,700 lots were vacant. That's a real big number.   Brian: [00:22:24] Yes. And, you know, I think there's evidence of a neighborhood like that, that's starting to make significant progress in reducing blight. But the question that everyone has is how do you reduce blight and promote new home ownership and things like that in a neighborhood without pricing out people who are from the neighborhood, or displacing residents. You know, like gentrification happens, it is a thing. Change happens. And managing that change, I think, is something that a neighborhood, like at the neighborhood level, can be done. But then I think there's, we're in the city of Pittsburgh. We have to think about managing change, encouraging growth in our city and then trying to manage that in a way. And I was just at an event yesterday with someone from the city of Pittsburgh, a representative from the city, and they talked about the number one need Pittsburgh has is turnkey new construction for people who are relocating to Pittsburgh. And I was really surprised by that statement. But I think it shows that while at a neighborhood level, there may be a particular issues that are really important, at the city level, sometimes those issues can be quite different. And so how did neighborhoods speak to cities and back and forth is a really important dialogue that has to happen.   Eve: [00:25:45] So, do you think a neighborhood like Garfield is managing the change? Because I know it's changed a lot in the last few years. It was a very poor, underserved neighborhood, and it's received quite a lot of attention in the last few years.   Brian: [00:25:59] I think it is a neighborhood that's actively managing that change. There are some neighborhoods ... we work with a lot of neighborhood groups, and we're not a nonprofit. Right? We do have a mission behind us, but there are some neighborhoods in the city of Pittsburgh where you talk about development and new construction, and people will just, they don't want even have a conversation about it. And they're trying to prevent change from happening. And that can be really challenging for the residents, and for people who want to be working in that neighborhood or living in that neighborhood. So, I think Garfield has done a good job of ... and then there's other neighborhoods on the other side where they're just sort of like, hey, it's we're open for business, you know, no rules and no regulations. So, I think Garfield has done a good job of balancing those two. And I think it's really up to the local community development organization, because they're looked at as the kind of voice of the neighborhood. So, how well can that director and the staff people manage those multiple voices? And they need to see, for instance, Garfield talks about, we need to see affordable new construction, but we need to see market rate new construction as well. We don't say we don't want that, we need that for our neighborhood. So, I think groups that realize you have to have a balance of those things are always the ones that we like to work with.   Eve: [00:25:19] Yes. So, what community engagement tools have you seen that have worked? You talk a lot about working in communities and making sure that you're sort of representing what they want. That can be hard, right?   Brian: [00:26:11] Yeah, it can be really hard. In Biloxi, Mississippi, we had different methods for community engagement. One method I really liked was we would host, and this is at our design studio in Biloxi on the main street there, we'd host something called Friday Morning Serial, S-e-r-i-a-l, but we served cereal, so we served cold cereal and coffee. And every Friday we would invite someone from the community to come in and talk about what they're, what they're doing, who they are. And we would invite folks from the neighborhood to sit. And it wasn't a long, wasn't a TED talk. It wasn't overly produced. It was come, talk for 15 minutes, and then we're just gonna have cereal and chat. And honestly, that was the best community engagement I had witnessed, because it was, it was a great organic way for people to start talking to their neighbors and learning about one another. And it wasn't like this formal presentation of the drawings, OK, here's the development site, it was a very natural conversation. That was one piece of engagement that I participated in that I thought was really fun.   Eve: [00:27:39] That's sounds really, that sounds charming.   Brian: [00:27:42] Yeah.   Eve: [00:27:44] We should do that here. That's really lovely.   Brian: [00:27:47] We should. And perhaps you'll have the, Elizabeth, she was running Friday Morning Serial at the Gulf Coast. Maybe she'll be a podcast guest at some point.   Eve: [00:27:57] Oh, very good. Yes.   Brian: [00:27:59] But in Pittsburgh, there's another kind of non-traditional community engagement. There's an event every year called Open Streets, where in different neighborhoods, they will shut down the streets to vehicular traffic and let people walk and bike in the middle of the street through different neighborhoods. And we've participated in that several times. You know, kind of little pop up booth. And that's a great way to talk to people and engage with folks, because they're out there having fun. And it's another way to get some informal community participation. So, it's called Open Streets Pittsburgh. And I think it's a great event.   Eve: [00:29:36] Well, I'm really delighted you mentioned that because, do you know I founded that, I  co-founded that.   Brian: [00:29:43] Oh really? Well, there you go.   Eve: [00:29:45] Yeah.   Brian: [00:29:45] So, did you found it with the intention of doing that?   Eve: [00:29:48] Founded with the intention of opening the streets to everyday people. It's not rocket science. People were doing it all over the world. Pittsburgh's always a little bit behind, right? But I'm really thrilled to hear you say that it's meaningful to you. It's a great event.   Brian: [00:30:07] And it just activates neighborhoods in a different way. When you're walking through the streets ...   [00:30:111] Amazing.   [00:30:11] ... I think they've done a good job of putting it in neighborhoods where the folks who typically engage in Open Streets, they might be more cycling-oriented, or like transit advocates, but they're doing it in neighborhoods now which may have seen a lot of disinvestment over the past 30, 40 years. And I think it's a great way to get people engaged in the neighborhood.   Eve: [00:30:32] Yeah,.   Brian: [00:30:32] Non-traditional. So good job, Eve, and other co-founders.   Eve: [00:30:43] I did not do alone. But, you know, it's interesting because streets and roads take up so much of our open space and it's pretty wonderful to be able to, you know, use it as a park for a short time. Once a month, you know, you just open the space and get rid of the cars, let people go out there, and have exercise classes, or walk, or bike, whatever they want to do. It's a really wonderful thing. It's really fabulous. So, I'm glad you enjoy it. But you and I also have talked about equity crowdfunding. And I'm wondering, you know, that's what I do. And I'm wondering, you know, if you think that would be helpful for engaging a community like Garfield. In what's happening there?   Brian: [00:31:15] Yeah. Yeah. As I think about equity crowdfunding, or just crowdfunding, in general, you know, part of the model opens up the company to a broader audience. Right? Not as many people participate in real estate deals as to equity crowdfunding deals. And then when you add the marketing component to it, you're really telling a story. I've saw some of the projects that you've had on your platform. And Jonathan Tate, he and I have spoken together at a couple of events, and I really think it's an opportunity to tell the story of a particular project really well. So, in addition to funding the project, I think the narrative that you create and the engagement that you can have in an open, a more open platform, is exciting. That's when I think about equity crowdfunding.   Eve: [00:32:05] Yeah. I think for me is, my hope had always been that it would be a way to let communities invest in what's happening around them. And I don't think it's working too well for that yet. I think there's just a very nascent industry and people don't know very much about it. And I think that maybe investing is a pretty threatening activity for most people who've never done it before. So, I hope that over time we can educate people and they understand that investing in their own community could be a really great thing. But that's down the road, right?   Brian: [00:32:38] Yeah.   Eve: [00:32:38] So, I'm going to wrap up with one question that I really want to ask you, and that is if there was one thing that you could change about real estate development in this country, what would it be?   Brian: [00:32:50] I would change ... the people who are thought of as developers, the type, you know ... like I am late 20's white male. Right? So, I may not be like a slicked back hair, like 50s suit-wearing 55-year old guy, who's a real estate developer. But I think there are many other people who don't think of real estate development as a career, a path. Whether it's particular minorities or gender types. I would love to see more diversity in the world of real estate development, because I think the more people that are able to see that as a career and engage in it, then will bring fresh perspectives to the projects that we see developed around our country. And when it's this, you know, when it's kind of the majority of folks working in that field or who are perceived as successful in that field, fit one type of persona, then it limits the quality of projects that are going to be executed. So, I'd love to see many more types of people become developers then kind of what we think traditionally of as a developer.   Eve: [00:34:03] Well, I completely agree. And I want to thank you very much for spending your time with me today. It's fascinating. And I'm sure we're going to be talking again soon.   Brian: [00:34:12] Absolutely. Thank you very much, Eve. I've really enjoyed it.   Eve: [00:34:13] That was Brian Gaudio. As a young student, Brian absorbed ideas from many places. Both Elemental's incremental housing in Chile, and the 100,000 Houses Project by the Philly-based firm Interface Studio Architects, have influenced his thinking along with the housing crisis in South America which he was exposed to during the filming of his documentary. It's fascinating how new ideas are developed out of such varied influences.   Eve: [00:34:45] You can find out more about impact real estate investing and access the show notes for today's episode at my website, EvePicker.com. While you're there, sign up for my newsletter to find out more about how to make money in real estate while building better cities. Thank you so much for spending your time with me today. And thank you, Brian, for sharing your thoughts. We'll talk again soon. But for now, this is Eve Picker, signing off to go make some change.

In this brief, pilot episode Genie Lauren shares the story of how she learned to fast, and was introduced to a ketogenic life, thanks to a shocking diagnosis before one very special day. Show Transcript: Let’s start from the very beginning. A very good place to start. I’m Genie Lauren and this is my Fast Life. So, you’ve heard this story before. . . or, maybe you haven’t? Either way, I’m gonna tell it. Here it goes. Picture it, New York City, the day before Thanksgiving, 2017; I’m at a follow-up to my annual physical and my doctor diagnoses me with prediabetes. Let me reiterate, this is the day before Thanksgiving. The biggest food day in an American year. Now, to be honest, I’m not even that much of a foodie. But, who doesn’t want to eat on Thanksgiving day? And, guess what my doctor ordered me to do. Cut sugar. The day before Thanksgiving. *Power down sound* Yeah, that wasn’t gonna happen. So, as you could imagine, the day after my doctor’s visit (Thanksgiving day) I BINGE. Two helpings of candied yams. Three slices of pie. Is that chocolate cake? I’ll have that too. Wash it all down with apple cider. Binge. B I N G E, binging was for me. If I was going to stop eating sugar (at least, for the immediate future), I was going to make my “goodbye” as sweet as possible. Pun sort of intended. I didn’t know it then, but in many ways, the next day would be the first day of my life. As you’d imagine, it was hard, at first — sugar is in almost everything. Bread? Sugar. Snacks? Sugar. Certain sauces? Sugar. I don’t care what Beyonce tells you — fruit? Sugar. We’ll dive into sugar, in another episode. Just understand that I successfully cut sugar, in all its forms, out of my diet for three months — right on time for my follow-up to the follow-up visit with my doctor. And, my reward for following instructions was an improved A1C and a loss of 10 lbs. I won! Right? Not so fast! If I went back to eating sugar I would just go back to being prediabetic (completely defeating the purpose of all my hard work). This wasn’t a time for backsliding, and my doctor ain’t Booboo The Fool. We wanted to keep the momentum moving forward, so for the next step, she recommended that I start intermittent fasting. Intermittent fasting is when you don’t eat for the majority of the day, condensing your meals into fewer hours in the day. We’ll get more into THAT later, what you need to know for now is that I. Was. STARVING. I’ve never been a foodie, but you never want something more than when you can’t have it. I wanted food, bad, but I couldn’t have it before 12:00 noon and after 8:00 pm — my new window of time for eating, each day. Like cutting sugar from my diet, intermittent fasting took some getting used to, but once I got the hang of it and it became my lifestyle, I grew curious as to what exactly my body was doing. I was losing weight (about another 10 lbs), and sleeping better (bye-bye, insomnia), but I had no idea why. So, I went to the place we all go when we are in search of knowledge and wisdom. I Googled. Come to find out what I was doing every day was putting my body into ketosis which resulted in some remarkable health benefits (if you’re wondering what ketosis is, we’ll get into that later, as well. I know! You want to know everything now, but I can’t give it all up right away.) I also discovered that intermittent fasting is even more powerful when paired with a ketogenic diet. Essentially the way it works is, a ketogenic diet puts you into ketosis and intermittent fasting keeps you there, and vice versa. After already seeing results with cutting sugar and intermittent fasting, I dove into the keto life. Fasting until 12:00 PM, eating strictly keto meals, and ceasing once the clock struck 8 was my new lifestyle. No pain, no gain. No, literally. Over a span of five months, there was no pain and I did not gain. In fact, I lost an additional 30 lbs of fat.

Travyon Martin would be 25 years old today. Today, Brady also launches a series on racial justice, gun violence, and gun violence prevention. To do so with the honor, attention, and transparency required, JJ is joined by: fabulous new co-host Kelly Sampson, Counsel at Brady; Aalayah Eastmond, Executive Council member of Team Enough; and Tatiana Washington, also an Executive Council member of Team Enough and advocacy associate at March for Our Lives. Together, Tatianna and Aalayah speak about being young women of color in the movement, allyship, racism...and what Brady is doing in the movement to incorporate racial justice and inter sectionalism. Mentioned in this podcast:The Right Not to Be ShotEffects of Gun Violence--Aalayah's testimonyFor more information on Brady, follow us on social @Bradybuzz, or via our website at bradyunited.org. Full transcripts and bibliography available at bradyunited.org/podcast.National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255. Music provided by: David “Drumcrazie” CurbySpecial thanks to Hogan Lovells, for their long standing legal support ℗&©2019 Red, Blue, and BradySupport the show (https://www.bradyunited.org/donate)

 When Adriana Marchione released, When The Fall Comes, she opened our eyes to how dance, poetry and performance could guide us through enormous grief. Today, she sits down with me to talk about the things that came first; what happened before her short film and the birth of her thriving therapy practice—  her own story of recovering from addiction. The motivation and inspiration for her upcoming film, The Creative High.  Adriana helps hundreds of people through her art and therapy practice, supporting them as they heal from grief, addiction and illness. As an expressive arts therapist, she takes a creative approach to recovery. Listen in as she shares how creating can serve as a container for pain and the ways art can not only help us to heal but also teach us a whole new way of seeing and communicating with one another. Episode Timeline:[00:05] Intro [00:53] Meet Adriana Marchione [02:36] How she is integrating healing into her work [06:40] Getting out of her head and into her body [08:34] Art is a learned language [10:03] Opening up to connect with others and yourself [12:39] Unmasking and seeing people more fully [16:25] Art and channeling creativity [26:40] Leaning into pain, creatively  [35:18] Amplifying joy with art [39:14] Adriana’s suggestion for you [42:39] Outro Resources Mentioned: The Creative High When The Fall Comes Adrianamarchione.com Standout Quotes:“I feel very in awe of the fact that there has been this one thread that's kind of carried me through, you know, and I've supported so many people throughout the years with addiction. And first I had to hit my own bottom and find my own process of recovery. Art was a big part of that.” - Adriana [4:53]“It's a learned language. Everyone's creative, but It's just about finding ways to express yourself and learning that even simple things simple tools can get you pretty far with art.” - Adriana [8:57]“What's coming to mind right now, is that in a way, [art] opens us to some other aspects of connecting... if you change the language, you change the quality of the connection as well. -Traci [10:03] “It's not always about regulating a hurt or suppressing a bad feeling that sometimes, and maybe we're I mean, maybe we are all looking to be more alive, aren't we?” - Traci [20:45]“...But I feel like there's an element of organically listening in that way. Right? Not trying to force somebody to feel more alive if they feel really flat, but that there tends to be this way in which in the human interaction, we're co-creating more aliveness this together.” -Traci [23:43] I always like when people make friends with the shadowy things that we do… it's a great model and example for the rest of us to keep listening more deeply rather than hearing the sickness; hearing for the wholeness in people. - Traci [24:47]    Connect: Find | Sidewalk Talk PodcastAt sidewalk-talk.orgOn Instagram: @sidewalktalkorgOn Twitter: @sidewalktalkorgFind | Traci RubleAt Traciruble.comOn Instagram: @TraciRubleMFTOn Twitter: @TraciRubleMFTOn Facebook: @TraciRubleMFTFind | Adriana MarchioneAt Adrianamarchione.comOn Instagram: @adrianamarchioneOn Twitter: @Marchione68On Facebook: @Adriana.marchioneSUBSCRIBE TO THIS PODCASTOn SpotifyOn Apple PodcastsOn Google PodcastsOn Spotify

Hi everyone, Dan Thompson here. Welcome to another wise money tools video. So we've talked a couple different videos now recently about leverage. Well, let's look at what that really means. Now there are several reasons as you know why we like to use life insurance when it comes to safe money. The plus sign in the equation and in a second here, I'm going to show you how to add leverage to a policy to accelerate it's productivity and its potential income. But first, here's a short list of why we like to use life insurance. It's an important asset to families and to businesses. First, it's very safe. It's called (Tier 1 Assets) basically means even banks can use life insurance and they do use life insurance. They put billions of dollars in it. As a tier 1 asset, what that really means it's the safest place a bank and put money. The second reason is (Guarantees). It's the only asset that can be guaranteed by the company itself. Even banks just use insurance, they don't even use the word guarantee. The next thing is (High Predictability). With whole life policies. The company even tells you how much they're gonna pay you the coming year. The next thing is (High Stability). These things have been around since before the Civil War, some companies have never missed paying their policyholders for 150 years or more. And then we can design the policies with flexibility that can be a big benefit as you go along. Next thing is (Rate Of Return) the rate of return without using leverage is pretty decent, especially because it has some additional tax benefits. When we add leverage that can even look much better. The next thing is the number one legal domestic tax shelter. For decades, both rich and poor have utilized insurance to protect their assets and reduce their tax burden. And then we have estate planning or charitable giving. Using life insurance can protect your estate from estate taxes. And it's an amazing way to give to your favorite church, school or charity. And finally, there's family protection. There's no better asset in the world to pass on to your family then life insurance. It's literally saved many of my clients from financial stress or even financial ruin when they've been able to pass on assets to their loved ones. Okay, so those are some of the great reasons why life insurance fits so well into many people's portfolios. But let's go on to leveraging and how do you leverage your policy to get a real good handle on this. Let's see how a bank uses leverage every single day. What I'm gonna do is pull up this very simple calculator to show you how it works. Let's take a bank making a $10,000 loan as an example. Suppose they charge 5% interest on that one year loan. As you can see that loan, they're gonna make $500 in the year, that's okay. Nothing to be too excited about right. But how does the bank really work? Banks have a little secret sauce that allows them to leverage the loans. You know what it is? It's you and I, its depositors. Every one of us is likely to have some sort of a checking account, a savings account. Some of you may even have a CD or two. How much do we get paid when we put our money in the bank right now? Right? Not too much. Checking accounts may not earn any interest, savings maybe one, one and a half percent. A CD if you go out long enough, you might pick up another half a point. Now banks can use your money and loan it out, they can loan out 9 times the bank's money. What that means is this if the bank puts up $10,000 of their own money, so to speak into the pot. They can also grab $90,000 of depositors money and put that into the pot. So for every $10,000 the bank has, they can actually loan a $100,000 or nine to one. Now let's go back to the calculator and see how that works out. Let's say that the bank's gonna pay one and a half percent to the depositor. Now let's add the 90,000 that they can use to loan out along with the 10,000 that they have. That means that they're gonna earn 5% right from the loan. They're gonna pay the depositor one and a half percent, which means they're gonna earn three and a half percent on the $90,000. So let's take a look. What the heck just happened there? The bank was only charging 5% for the loan, right? But because of leverage and using the OPM method, which is other people's money, they were able to turn a 5% loan into a 36.50% rate of return. Now, they still only earned 5% on their $10,000 or $500. But they earned an additional thirty one hundred and fifty dollars on the depositors money for a total of thirty six hundred fifty dollars. If we divide 36.50 into the actual money that they've invested, that's basically a 36.50% who returned. This is why the banks get excited, right? So how can you do the same thing that the bank does? Simple, we use leverage similar to the bank and this case, let me show you how this would work by actually borrowing from the bank, it might look like this. Suppose we have $10,000 in our cash value or inside of our policy that we can access anytime. Now let's suppose that we can borrow $10,000 from the local bank using our $10,000 in our cash value as collateral. So there's gonna be a loan rate charged for us to borrow money from the bank. And because it's such a safe loan for banks, we're probably gonna get that money for around 3, 3.50%. That means that we have about a one and a half percent spread assuming inside of our insurance policy, we're gonna make about 5%. So we make 5% on our $10,000 in our cash value, which is $500. And we make an additional 1.50% on the bank's money and that gives us another $150. So that takes us to a $650 return that year or 6.50%. Now that might not seem of that exciting, but just with one simple leveraged year, we were able to turn a 5% rate of return to 6.50%. Now what if we leverage that one more time, and now we have $20,000 of the bank's money that turns the money we're making into $300. Now our return is 8%. Not too bad. Now take a look at this graph. The orange line represents the S&P 500 over the last 35 years with using simple secure leveraging. We're now competing favorably with the S&P 500 long term average. Well, let's go one more time. leverage it up one more time. Now we're earning 9.50%. Actually beating the 35 year S&P 500 average. And if we go one more time, we get to 11%. And then one more time to 12.50%. This is all just by getting a 1.50% spread between our loan cost and our rate of return. So you can see the power of leverage. But how do you widen that spread? In other words, how do you get from 1.50 to 2.50 to 3, and so on? Well, as many of you know, seen my videos, I am not a fan of indexed universal life. In fact, I've got the indexed universal life course out there, explaining the pitfalls of IUL. These videos are extremely accurate. The agents out there don't know how to design them to start with. They're designed with just a bunch of commission and costs and it eats up your cash value. And the older you get, the worse it is because your cost of insurance never cease. okay? However, if you build it correctly, you maximize the premiums and then you add the secret sauce of leverage, you can finally potentially make an IUL work. And we when we couple that with the whole life that can buffer the years where the IUL actually gets a zero return. It can even make the balance even more sustainable. Now remember in a zero year and an IUL, you still have the cost of insurance, you have loan costs and fees if they're still in the fee year. So it's really not a zero year. However, by using leverage, the years where you have even a reasonable return. Let's just say 7% and that spread gets to be 3% or 4%. You can get significantly ahead and get a huge buffer that can help offset any zero years. By using leverage, you potentially take a decent return and turn it into a significantly better return. Which is what you have to have to make sure you stay ahead of IUL costs. And even if you were outside of the policy and you took massive risk, the chances of you getting these kinds of returns are pretty slim. So let me give you an example of using the bank's money to build your wealth. Let's suppose you have an apple tree, and every year it produces some delicious apples. And one day a buyer from Walmart comes to your door and says, Man, we'd sure like to buy your apples and you say well for how much. Now, not being in the apple business. I have no idea if this is accurate. Let's just say for our example he's willing to pay $5 for a bushel of apples now. I don't even know what a bushel of apples is, but roll with me on this one. You say great, happy to sell them to you. However, you only have one tree. And even though you're making 5 bucks on a bushel, you wish you had more trees, right? So then next thing that happens is you meet up with a grower from down south and he tells you, he's got a bunch of apples to sell. He's got all kinds of trees, but he can't find a buyer. He's willing to sell you his apples for 350 a bushel. He's also a big time producer and he can get you just about as many apples as you want. So you call up Walmart and ask if they could use some more apples and they say, oh, we'll take all you can sell us. So you get with the grower and you tell them you're gonna buy a bunch of bushels from him, and you're gonna pay him 350 for each bushel and then sell them to Walmart for 5 bucks. That's how leverage works. That's how we can make a typical no-frills, decent safe policy, but turn it into a money producing machine. Most financial advisors will tell you that risk and reward are always offsetting each other, that in order to get a high reward, you have to take significant risk. Well, Buffett, Warren Buffett's been arguing against that for decades, and he's obviously proved it. However, it's not always easy to invest the buffle way, and it takes a lot of time and effort and major patience to wait for the right time to buy. But by using leverage in one of the safest places to store your money on the planet, which is life insurance. You can potentially broach into that Warren Buffett like return with nowhere near the time and talent it would normally take to get there. Now unfortunately, the vast majority of advisors have no idea this strategy even exists. They're not taught it. I was never taught it when I went through financial planning training. Otherwise, how could any of these guys encourage you to put your money at risk when there's really no need? You wouldn't have to. Advisors basically want you to come to their firms roll the dice ride the roller coaster. Hope it turns out okay for you and you lived in that perfect timeframe where the markets did nothing but go up for you. There's really no need to take that risk. With secured leverage. You can compete favorably with some of the best investment returns out there and sleep at night knowing your money safe. There's just really nothing like it. Well, that's it hope you get a better sense of how to use secured leverage. If you have any questions. Make sure you shoot those questions to questions at wise money tools. com. Make sure you subscribe, feel free to make comments. And if you want to have a strategy session so that you don't waste another day or lose piles of money. Click on the time trade link below and we'll setup a time to spend few minutes together. That's about it. Till next week. Take care.

In today’s modern world, we like things to come instantly. Because of technology, we can do things as fast as possible. We believe that our time is so valuable that spending time on something is almost impossible. But we have to remember that the trees that we have today didn’t grow in a day. We have to put in a lot of work if we want to achieve our goal because patience is a virtue. Dean will teach us a lesson in this podcast episode relating to why trees don’t grow in a day. Stay tuned! ---------- Automated Transcript Below: Dean Soto 0:00 Hey, this is Dean Soto founder of freedom in five minutes calm and pro sulum.com PROSULUM.COM. And we're here again with another freedom in five minutes podcast episode. Today's topic is this trees don't grow in a day. That and more coming up. Well hello, welcome back to the podcast. Nice to hear from you. Nice to see you What are you chickens looking at? I'm looking at some chickens that think I got you think I got some treats for your chickens ain't gonna happen. Once you come mix my compost over here needs you to mix my compost pile anyway. Not gonna mix my compost pile get get a step and so, back a couple episodes ago, I had mentioned that we had planted a whole bunch of treats and not just that I have a ton of raised garden bed. Actually, I should say four raised garden beds in a in a garden enclosure now. And the so they've got these raised garden beds also got a what's called a roof stout potato patch. And so what I've reached out potato patch is is essentially you take a whole bunch of straw, or mulch or anything like that, you put it on the ground, and you do it again, and you do it again and you do it again and you do it again and you do it again, you just have a whole bunch of mulch on the ground. And you put potatoes and you put potatoes at the very bottom of it and with with the water from the rain and everything like that, it should grow. It should all the water should, should be all trapped in there and the potatoes should grow. So as I was doing All of these things, one of the frustrations that I was feeling one of the frustrations that I was feeling because this is the first time I've ever done this, right. We've been here nearly three years. This is the first time I started venturing out into actually building a homestead and started gardening and, and things like that. I mean we have chickens, but planting is different. Right? planting something is it's a pain in the butt it from from, from my modern mind to wrap my head around. It's extremely difficult. And why is that? It's because I'm so used to the microwave. I am so used to that which we've gotten rid of we actually don't have a microwave, but we're so used to the microwave. And And once I've planted so I'll tell you all the things Is that I've planted so we have four raised garden beds right. One of those garden beds actually has seeds in them and has a we planted spinach, carrots, and I think broccoli and a couple of other things. The other garden beds don't have anything in it because we we put a bunch of bunch of organic matter in it and we're just waiting. I'm just waiting. That's my wife's thing. Okay, planted, I'm trying to create a food force as well. So planted a whole bunch of stuff in this area that has just a lot of lot of stuff going on already. And, and got 12 to 14 trees or something like that have all these things that I kind of listed before. Plus the rooster grind. Out of all of that work out of the out of the tons of work that has gone into into all of that so with the even with the food for us I sorry I had to go back to this because just to give you an idea, planted radishes in this food forest or your radishes, cantaloupe, radishes, cantaloupe, oregano, parsley, time, carrots, different types of carrots, different kinds of watermelon, whole bunch of different whole bunch of things, whole host of things beans, peas, I want to say All in all, we probably planted over 50 different things in the last few months. And what has been the major frustration what has been the thing that I literally have such a hard time with? It is the fact that I do not see quick progress at all. It's so hard. I'm like Oh my gosh. Okay, so do I see do I see progress? Yes, that the spinach is growing and went from being super duper small to now it's now it's a little bit bigger. The carrot seeds went from being dirt to actually seeing the seeds starting to sprout, which is cool, right? But, but the trees we got it was it's it's wintertime as a recording this the trees well the thing that sucks about the trees is that they went dormant, right? So they're just sitting there doing nothing, at least as far as I can tell, which is of course not the case they're doing what they're supposed to do. But I want I want to see these things grow. Oh, the other thing. The other thing is that the brew stout potato patch. It actually shows that It's starting to show some some growth. It has some potatoes growing, which, which makes it so I'm looking at it going, go go faster. It is so hard man, I can tell you right now it is so hard for me to get a wave mosquito. It is so hard for me to look at this. Even though I see progress, even though I see these things to look at this, and I just like just come on already. Let's go. But here's the deal is that trees are not, they do not. They do not grow in a day. Right? Because we've also planted I've already direct seeded some persimmon trees, some plums, trees, some apricot trees and those ones Gonna take even longer than the ones that are planted that are saplings. But trees do not grow in a day. And so often, often we we take, we want to see these huge results, right in the beginning when we're trying to do something, we want to get the thing right now that's the way our culture is, let's get all of this as as quickly as possible, right? But there are times whether, especially if you're in sales, sometimes the sales cycle is two months, three months, six months, seven, maybe even a year. That'd be a really long sales cycle. But often we we don't do the things today. Now the That that will bring these the simple, simple little things like people. So our pro sulim clients, the ones who see massive success, the ones who see like massive results are the ones who take the five minutes a day to create the video that their virtual systems architect, their virtual assistant on superpower with superpowers does used to create the standard operating procedures and grow and everything like that the ones who the ones who simply want to say go do this thing and get a task. They actually see really poor results. Right? Because they go say they go go manage my social media account and give no direction, no clear process, no clear documentation, no nothing like that. They don't do the system. That even though the system takes five minutes is like planting a little seed even. It didn't take me long to plant seeds. The the system is there to allow you to plant these little seeds that once the documentations created, the person can go and do it without ever coming back to you to ask how to do something. They they're set up for success and and we just see Matt like massive like quadrupling revenue, you know that are the business owner spends like zero time doing any work on their business in like 30 days, 60 days, 90 days. Right. But those who want the tree, they want the fruit right away without doing without planting the little seeds. They lose more often than not. They lose, they lose. And so so this is where we really have to look at See, are we willing to go with the season? Are we willing to go with the system? Are we really willing to? This is why, you know, when people go to, say, psychologists to fix their marriage, you know, they, they, the psychologist says, you know, hey, you know, it's going to be, you know, let's do this once a week for the next three months. And you need to he need to actually apply what we, what we're what we're actually doing during this thing. Those those who actually have success and see their marriage grow, typically, are the ones who follow the system, follow what the psychiatrist or psychologist says. Those who fail are the ones who go they go one week. They try it out, and they they get into a big massive fight. And they go, Oh, this doesn't work. I'm we're done and I go, there's this doesn't Work, I'm not going to do this anymore. Right? Not gonna do this anymore. And so so the, the big thing that, that I think a lot of us, especially in today's age, fail to see and fail to even have the habit of is seeding and waiting for those seeds to grow, knowing, knowing that, okay, if I want X amount of dollars in six months, these are the things I need to do now. If I want to have a happy marriage, these are the things I need to do now. Because when you start trying to get the fruit, so if I if you start trying to plant something right in, and you go, Hey, this isn't working and you dig up the tree. The next you dig up the seed as it's starting to sprout. What happens the whole thing dies there's no established route there's you try and you're trying to get the fruit but you end up killing the entire thing very quickly you know if it's if it's trying to save your marriage it's I this isn't gonna work I want good feelings now. I don't want to put in the work. I want good feelings now. The you run the risk of killing the entire thing, right? I want a business that automates that that has a standard operating procedures that everyone can follow that I can replace anybody at any time. And that that a somebody who wants to buy my business looks at and goes, whoa, this is a totally automated turnkey system, and I want it now. I just want to tell this person do do all these things. And and it's done. It doesn't work that way. I want a fit body I want muscles I want I want to look like a Greek god. But I want that by next weekend when you're 300 pounds, not gonna work. Trees do not grow in a day. And so the big thing is spending those five minutes a day, literally could be five minutes a day, planting those seeds, planting those things. Planting those new habits planting, planting the the standard operating procedures, planting the the the love notes to your wife or your to your husband. It's those things. Those things that over time you doing them will blossom into huge trees with amazing fruit that people will look at envy and be inspired by. I love you too big boy. You're gonna go with Jen. Okay, well she's coming back up right here. She's coming back up. She's right there. Alright, so freedom in five minutes.com go check that out or go to prosulum. com if you want to virtual systems architect they are virtual assistants with superpowers to transform your business in 30 60 90 days into a fully automated system that you can sell at the highest price if you wanted to. You don't have to You can just enjoy your your business that works without you and makes you a lot of money. Go check that out PROSULUM.COM and I will catch you in the next freedom in five minutes episode.

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In this episode, Lisa talks to her business partner/Coach Neil Wagstaff about resetting your mindset and how to get your brain to do what it should.   We all have goals and plans and as we head into a new year we are all making new years resolutions and dreaming of what the year could bring us.    But how often do you fall off the bandwagon, how often do you sabotage your own goals and don't know why. Neil and Lisa discuss tricks to get your mind on track, to developing new habits, reprogramming your subconscious to get onboard with the plan and how to trick the limbic brain into doing what your conscious brain wants.     We would like to thank our sponsors:   Running Hot - By Lisa Tamati & Neil Wagstaff   If you want to run faster, longer and be stronger without burnout and injuries then check out and TRY our Running Club for FREE on a 7-day FREE TRIAL Complete holistic running programmes for distances from 5km to ultramarathon and for beginners to advanced runners.   All include Run training sessions, mobility workouts daily, strength workouts specific for runners, nutrition guidance and mindset help Plus injury prevention series, foundational plans, running drill series and a huge library of videos, articles, podcasts, clean eating recipes and more.   www.runninghotcoaching.com/info and don't forget to subscribe to our youtube channel at Lisa's Youtube channel  www.yotube.com/user/lisatamat and come visit us on our facebook group   www.facebook.com/groups/lisatamati Epigenetics Testing Program by Lisa Tamati & Neil Wagstaff. Wouldn’t it be great if your body came with a user manual? Which foods should you eat, and which ones should you avoid? When, and how often should you be eating? What type of exercise does your body respond best to, and when is it best to exercise? These are just some of the questions you’ll uncover the answers to in the Epigenetics Testing Program along with many others. There’s a good reason why epigenetics is being hailed as the “future of personalized health”, as it unlocks the user manual you’ll wish you’d been born with! No more guesswork. The program, developed by an international team of independent doctors, researchers, and technology programmers for over 15 years, uses a powerful epigenetics analysis platform informed by 100% evidenced-based medical research. The platform uses over 500 algorithms and 10,000 data points per user, to analyze body measurement and lifestyle stress data, that can all be captured from the comfort of your own home Find out more about our  Epigenetics Program and how it can change your life and help you reach optimal health, happiness, and potential at https://runninghotcoaching.com/epigenetics You can find all our programs, courses, live seminars and more at www.lisatamati.com    Transcript of the Podcast:   Speaker 1: (00:01) Welcome to pushing the limits, the show that helps you reach your full potential with your host, Lisa [inaudible] brought to you by Lisatamati.com Speaker 2: (00:13) Well, hi everybody. Lisa Tamati here and I am once again with Neil Wagstaff. How are you doing Neil? I'm good, I'm very good. And tonight Neil and I, this is just before Christmas that we were recording this and we want to, you know, we're coming up to new year's and time to reflect on what you did this year and it might be playing for next year's goals that you want to sit out. And we thought we would do a session on resetting your mindset. I knew. So we want to go over some tips and tricks and some things we use. Think about when you're setting goals and how you going to be able to stay on the right track more often. So first of all, you've got to set some goals. I knew where do we go from here? Speaker 3: (00:56) Is this the best place to start? Make sure there's a, there's a goal in a goal in place and make sure it's a clear goal. Make sure it was well outlined and make sure, most importantly, once you've got the goal in place, you understand why you are doing it. Speaker 2: (01:09) Why, why the why, the why. The why is a really important fact to see if you have a goal in itself. It's, it's in it. It's nothing. It's just a piece of paper that you wrote something or it's all of those. It's when you start unpacking the why that you want to get this goal. That's when you come into the emotional triggers and your values and all this sort of stuff that actually creates the action that actually creates the, the, the ability for you to overcome the obstacle obstacles in order to get to that goal. So it's really important to understand your why. Now when you're working with a client, what do you do to pull out the why if you like, Speaker 3: (01:53) Hey, it's, it's really making sure it's down in your, it's written down in your words, your language. It's, it's used, used the words that you, you actually come out of your mouth, the language you use. So as an example of someone had been very stereotypical, says they're gonna they might not want to lose weight and I'm going to then continuously ask why. And it's like literally peeling back the layers of an onion. So we want to, as you said, get deeper and deeper, fond at the emotional reason that's driving that. And once you keep putting back the layers, why, why do you want to lose? Why'd you want to lose weight? Well, I want to lose weight because I want to feel more confident. Okay. Why do you want to feel more confident? Because I want to be able to comfortably company run half marathon. Speaker 3: (02:33) Okay. And why'd you want to run the half marathon? Because I want to be a good role model for my children. Okay. And why do you want to do that? Because my dad wasn't a good role model to me, so I want to step up now, make sure that I'm really a straight to my children, that I'm moving and being regularly healthy. And am regularly active is, is what we need to do to, to move forward in a productive way. Once you get all those layers back, we've then got the words that you jump out. There will be things like confidence, health activity, role model, and then we can put that into a statement that actually means something. And that's the key thing is the statement that the all clients have in front of them should mean something to them. And then that statement, we are statements to write down on paper and then that is then put somewhere that they can see it on a regular basis daily. Speaker 3: (03:21) And for some people who are really encouraged to actually rewrite it on a weekly basis. So whether that's taught into update it into a Google doc or it's actually written down and rewritten. So that is just front of mind writing. We've, the experience I've had and firstly from doing myself actually having to write it out, just brings it back front and center again. You know, I want to be, for me, my key words that have been, I've been enrollment of my children being a superhero for them. I want them to look up at me like I'm a, I'm a superhero, so I want to remind myself that on a regular basis so that that's my why and once I put that clearly in my head, understand and let me do a little bit of work on purpose as well, but that's probably another podcast in itself. Speaker 3: (04:00) But really once you've got the goal written on paper, clearly there, then that is what you're going to base your daily decision on. Because if you really want to get to that and achieve it and get to that half marathon, do it in a time. You won't be the wrong mode. You want be the be the superhero you want to be. Then each day when you're making your decisions, you make your decisions purely based on your goal that's clear in your heads. And if it's not clear and you don't understand why, then it's so, so easy to take the wrong path and make the wrong decision each day because you're not very, very clear on what you're doing. If you're a hundred percent clear on what you're doing and taking the right path and making the right decision is a whole lot easier. Speaker 2: (04:38) Yup. And we have like two to 300 decisions a day to make. And so this is really, really important that we have these goals and these are the reasons why in the front of our brain all the time that it's how, and I actually find two that actually working that physically on an old fashioned note and piece of paper much better than on a computer. I find that it just, it gets in your brain more, you know, and you have it in front of you. And when we come to, I call them lawyer folk in the road, each decision that we have as a fork in the road and I can just decide to go lift, which will lead me to the path towards more success than the other one is away from the goals that I want to have. And if we take the, you know eating chocolate, what am I definite weaknesses in life is a chocolate and right. Speaker 2: (05:22) So when I come to the decision, I actually want to eat less chocolate. The chocolate sitting there in front of me and I can decide I'm going to either eat it because it tastes good or I can stick to my goals, which won't be to lose weight or to, to have a healthier diet. And then when I understand the why behind it, I can take a little bit more of a zoomed out view instead of just the taste and the immediate impulse. So we as human beings tend to run on Sudi sick and decision making impulses. And if we can to lay a decision for just a few seconds, sometimes we can override then impulse to just stick the chocolate in your mouth. Right? And, and so w when we zoom out a little bit and we see what's around the corner, cause often we come to a fork in the road and all you can see is the chocolate. Speaker 2: (06:12) Yes or no. You can't actually see you like you, you're not thinking about, well if I eat this chocolate and I do this behavior repeatedly is obviously one piece of chocolate isn't going to be a problem. But if I do this behavior repeatedly, then around the corner as perhaps disease round the corner is obesity around the corner was diabetes. And, and while negative health outcomes I say, and not a motivator, it's still a good thing to be able to zoom out and to understand, well actually I want to be fit. I want to feel good. When I got to the beach, the sear on the summer and we my bikini, I, I want to, you know, whatever it is that moves and motivates you, seen as more likely to be at least a ten second sex discussion in your mind about whether you're going to do it. Speaker 2: (06:56) And sometimes you'll start to win in those discussions. If you can just delay the impulse a little bit is as human beings we and this is scientists speaking, not me. We all go towards pleasure and away from pain. We don't like to move ourselves towards painful decisions. And, and when I first heard this, I was like, I don't agree with it. I, I, you know, running a marathon definitely can be painful. I knew, you know, or an ultramarathon there's a hell of a lot of pain and discipline and overcoming yourself. And they said yes, but you're still going towards pleasure because you bigger goal. And again, we're looking at the zoomed out view is actually leading you towards more pleasure. The goal of having the marathon done the middle around your neck, that, that feeling of achievement. So you are moving towards pleasure and that pleasure is bigger than the pain of having to overcome yourself to get out the door to go training this morning. Speaker 2: (07:54) Does it make sense? So the pleasure and pine thing, it can be just an immediate impulse, the pleasure of that Tyson, that chocolate is going to make me eat it right now. Or I take a slightly zoomed out view at the bigger goal and w w w worked towards the pleasure of being fitter and stronger and losing weight or whatever the goal is. And remember, this stuff is not just about food and training. This is not just about that. This is what every goal you have in your life and your career and your business. If you can take this, this method, if you like, this framework that we're trying to give you and see this as a real fork in the road. Get a picture with a, you know, a tree in the middle of the road that goes left in a road that goes right and picture that in your brain. And when you come to those decision points, try and think about what's around the corner and what is my bigger goal and zoom out a little bit and at the beginning, Neal, isn't it? Isn't it true that when you be stopped starving you habit, it's a really tough road at the, Speaker 3: (08:56) This is real, real hard and it's not. If it was easy, then we'd all be doing the right stuff all the time, but it's a real, what's worked for me personally and everyone we're working with is just really, you've got a fork in the road and just understanding that doing small things consistently will can lead you down the bad road. So consistently, as you said, in chocolate in small pieces daily will eventually lead to the you somewhere. You don't want to be consistently having four or five coffee today daily. In the short term it provide pleasure, but in the longterm it's going to take it somewhere you want to be. If you flip it round and often the Creighton, the new habit, it feels quite overwhelming. There's going to be a real big, big challenge, but if you just pick one or two things and work out, if I consistently do those day in, day out, it doesn't need to be massive things. Speaker 3: (09:45) It could be simply walking for an additional 15 to 20 minutes a day. It could be drinking a little bit more water each day. It could be something real simple, but you work out. I consistently do that and I do that every day, day in, day out. Then all of a sudden the path to the pleasure and the longterm goal gets a whole lot easier. So it's not massive things you need to look at and that's where a lot of people end up taking the wrong puffs. It's actually just too much to do and it's really not. It's consistently just the little things. And to your point, looking at 30 seconds of immediate pleasure looking out across and above that and into the future and seeing that, right? If I just leap frog over that go this way, then all of a sudden the results start coming. Speaker 3: (10:27) Health changes, body changes, how you're feeling changes. And now it becomes easier to make, make more future future decisions by agreed, yes. The habit for me is is the tough part, but consistent little bits each day and work out what are you willing to commit to? What can you commit to? Because a site, a lot of people's at, if you could be 50% further ahead from where you are now, would you take that and everyone goes, well yeah, so it's not like we're asking you to make a huge change. If you can make some a 50% improvement, which percentage wise doesn't sound massive, but some changes that are quiet re give you 50% improvement. That's goal. If you're 50% in three months time than you are today. That's some big improvements from a health point of view. Some big improvements from a fitness point of view, big improvements from a mindset point of view, big improvements from a business point of view. Whatever you apply this to is it gives you some big, some some big wins and I'll ask the question as well. What's the one thing if you did it consistently each day, who would make the biggest difference to your goal? Yeah, Speaker 2: (11:27) The 80 20 rule. Yeah, exactly. Speaker 3: (11:29) One thing that I'm trying to do. Lots of little things. What's the one thing that will give you the biggest, best bang for your buck? What that out and then just go go at that. Because in a amongst time you're going to be glad this is Speaker 2: (11:42) In chopping things up into little bits that you can handle when you hear it. You know, it's like that analogy that I've used a lot of times about running through New Zealand and being totally overwhelmed by the thought of this 2000 plus kilometers and mum going to me just get to the Dame through Apple for status. Stop thinking about all that stuff. You know like if I say to, I'm going to eat healthy for 24 hours a day, seven days a week for the rest of my life, that's never going to happen. Cause on I myself, I know I'm not always going to win and that's okay. But if I say to myself like, I'm going to have five good dinners this week and I'm going to, I'm gonna not have a takeaways or something, then that's a small goal and I can manage this week and I'm focusing on just one or two things at a time. Speaker 2: (12:25) There was also, you know, when you, when you make a habit and you, you, you starting to develop a new habit, it takes about 60 days for the brain to be able to actually make a new pathway in the head. So we have what they call neural pathways. Now these are habits that you've formed and connections in your mind that make it, then the brain is very lazy and then it wants to use as little energy as possible. So when you create a pathway in your mind that repeat so behavior over and over again, it goes, Oh, this is easy. And it's, you've got a real big highway. If you can imagine you've made a big deep groove and the in your, in your brain, we're not physically but I a deep highway, that this is where the traffic is going every day and the brain knows this pathway. Speaker 2: (13:13) It knows this behavior. And so it becomes a, the path of least resistance. So how that translates to habit forming is it in the first few weeks, you're going to find it royally, really tough cause you're going to be running all willpower and decisions and the goals that you've set and having this front of mind and that requires some willpower. But willpower will, will run out on, you can tell you will run out on you. But what doesn't run out on ya is the fact that you've created this new neural pathway, this, you've created this habit. And then it actually becomes easier for the brain to just to, you know, I did the social example. I have a morning routine. I get out of bed, I do some stretching exercises, I go and have a cold shower, horrible. And then I'd gotten him a better leader or a vegetable juice. Speaker 2: (14:02) And it's not life stuff. It's horrible. You know, it's what, it's what I should be having. And that's the way I start my day. And it's a good thing because I'm sitting my day out. But at the beginning it was like, Oh, this is awful. Now my body does it without even thinking. It just goes. Because that is the habit that I've created over many, many months. And so now it's actually quite normal for me to do it. And it's actually a, I can seal it when I, when I travel and I don't have my blender or whatever with me and I can't do my routine. It's like, Ooh, don't feel like right. Usually because I haven't had that routine to follow. So it gets easier as we do these things. And so just get through those first couple of weeks and then already really it will be easier. Speaker 2: (14:46) And when you get to 60 days, it'll be a piece of cake, you know? But so the Brian moved type their path of least resistance once you've set that up. So another little trick that I use Neil, and I've done it if you use this one, is if I'm don't feel like training for example, own like, you know, feeling what and I don't really want to and I'm unmotivated and I know that I've got a race coming up or I've got something that I want to achieve. A little trick that I use to get myself going is that I count backwards from five, four, three, two, one. And when, you know, every movie in the world has got that, you know, with, we're going to lift off in 10 seconds, 10, nine, eight, seven, six, even if you just do it from five to one, it creates this impulse of action because you've heard that so many times and you, you, you know, they don't. Speaker 2: (15:38) Zero, you're going to take off. So, and there's a whole book written on this about just counting down from five to zero. And by the time you get to zero, you'll just go and do without ruminating, without thinking and overthinking. Do I feel like training today? Do I not feel you need a bloody feel like I can tell you when you've had a hard day at work and you know things have gone wrong, you'd just rather go home and I put a bottle of wine. We all feel like that, but if you can go and put your gym clothes on or your running clothes on, I have a bargain with myself. I'm just going to get changed and then I'll say and once I put my clothes on, usually I'm like, cool, I feel more athletic already and I've actually done this thing and I'll, well I'm here now. Speaker 2: (16:22) I might as well just do a little warmup and see how I feel and then I start warming up and then all of a sudden my body starts to kick into gear. My body warms up, it gets ready for action and then we're off. We're off to the races, but I hate to overcome myself each and every bloody time actually people is, it's not just like, you know, Oh are you one of those motivated athletes who loves to give them the gym everyday? No, there are very many days when I do not feel like going for a run when I do not feel like going to the gym. But that's a little trick that I use to get my app Speaker 3: (16:56) The road. Exactly. We've been, you know, you said at the start at least it's having that fork in the road and setting yourself up, giving yourself signs valid. I like to put signs that direct me in to that, to the, the right fork in the road. So last night, it's good example. We've we've had a few nights this week. We've had friends around for barbecues and things like that. This morning is, I definitely getting up and going for a run. So I put my spiky ball. I used to roll my feet before a run. I'll stick that on the wood on the workbench before I went to bed last night, made sure I knew where shorts, t-shirt, have fines were for my, my phone's heart goes to my music when I'm running. All those things are out shoes by the front door. So when I got up this morning and walked into the kitchen, all those, they're the signs for me. Right? Not rolling your feet, trying to the, it was, there was no reason because the easy thing to do, if those things weren't there, then all of a sudden I'm off down Speaker 2: (17:50) The, the other path, and this is what I want everyone listening to understand is the people will look at often look at you and me and other people like this guy and they just get up and do it. It's easy. It's, it's not, it's not. But what we've got better at doing is, is really getting our minds and in the position to make the right decision. And that some of the time you need to, you need to do things like you've described things that I've described where you put your sign up, they put them up, you make it easy. And then you have your your accountability partners in place as well. The people that are going to ask you like in the day, how was your run? The minute I came down to the, to the gym this morning to jump on the podcast with you as I walked in, it was couple of memes I'd already told and couple of the team who had already told I was going running. Speaker 2: (18:34) First thing else was how did you run feel so much better explained to them how great the run was rather than saying, Oh yeah, so that and that, that's where you start to get the, the feeling success as well and that's the bit you is never no way that I want to walk in this morning and go that didn't do it. So when I saw the people I knew I was going to see, right, they were my accountability partners who are even realizing they were going to be my accountability partner. It says if they pay pressure that they are good prefers. Yeah. And we are all part of a, you know, they talk about the herd mentality and I like to call it like a Wolf pack. Really. You know, you're like, you, you're part of a pack and a when, when someone just exudes a little bit of pressure on you or makes you accountable, it's gonna make you go, you know, it's gonna make you go a whole lot more. Speaker 2: (19:21) Another example, my husband Heisley, he, he's had a hell of a week. The Farber gave some mess of big fires, you know, lots of overtime, three days, three nights. I haven't seen him in, in a week and tonight on his schedule was a 35 K run because he's preparing for the unity ultra, which we've got coming up in March, which is 84 Ks and you know, I all signed to him last night when if you have another really bad shift night then you know, you might want to shift that. And luckily last night wasn't too bad but he had everything prepared. You know, he had all his gear out, he had the foods that he needed, he hit the water all prepared. He had his literal lights all done. He had prepared his mind all day yesterday for the beta lets coming today. And he just came in the house before to get some headphones and then he ran back out again and carried on his way. Speaker 2: (20:09) And he's on a mission and he's happy because he's, he's actually doing the thing that he set out to do and he prepared himself for it, even though he's had a hell week. And I've said to him after this, you need a bloody good break and you need to sit and watch YouTube for a while, you know? And then it's okay. And it's understanding that as well that you need that downtime. But that's a classic example of somebody who's prepared themselves and his prepaid, the mind for the battle is to come and he's out there doing it right now. So, you know, and that makes me proud of him and in what he's doing. So home, like we have got the unity ultra coming up. I just wanted to mention that while we're talking about it. So I, I'm invested at for the unity ultra, which is a a 51 mile or 83 K's, I think it is down in Christchurch in March of 2020, if anyone is interested in doing this. Speaker 2: (21:01) This has been done is a to commemorate the victims of the Moscow techs. And Christchurch, one of the organizers lost his auntie in this horrific event and was moved to as a run out wanting to do something and Koran golfs. And he asked his friend who's a rice organizer and who does a lot of charity events to come and help organize this event. And they're actually over in Bali at the moment, running another event. But this one is going to take place on the 20th of March 20, pretty 20th to 22nd of March. And so it's one day of running, but it's a whole three day of beans around, you know, sinking in, in, in showing solidarity to the people that were affected by this horrific event and honoring the 51 people who died in, they'll see lives. And we're also going to be raising money for the red cross to help refugees who are being set up in New Zealand and needing some help and support around and the, you know, establishing themselves in New Zealand. Speaker 2: (22:03) So a great cause, a great reason to be doing it. So if anyone is wanting to find out more about that, you can go to the unity oprah.com. And, or reach out to us and we can tell you more. So that was just an a little bit of an aside. But going back to the goal setting into this year, like we're coming up to the end of the year, we've got the new year's resolutions coming in. 90% of people who sit new year's resolutions, I don't know what the actual statistic is, but it's pretty horrific. Do not follow through with it. So I don't be one of those statistics this year. Be one of the ones that's, it's some really good, well thought out goals. Start to understand your why behind these goals and then start to understand what it's going to take to get there, break it down into small bite sized pieces and then start developing the habits that will get you there and understand that you are going to fall off the bandwagon. I knew you're not going to be perfect, Speaker 3: (23:01) So if you need help then there's a whole process, quite detailed process we take off on through understanding their goals, their purpose, their why, what their purpose in life, what they're doing is, is as we've talked about many times before laces when you achieve your goals, there's a lot of other factors that come into it and that's what we can help you with. If you want to, we can take you through a goal setting session, a purpose session at the start of the year and then tie that back to what you're doing, the chances of you been successful in achieving it. If you've got support around you, if you've got coaching around you. We use, we use coaches ourselves. We use mental, mental ourselves for that reason because we know we're going to be a much higher chance of being successful and achieving our goals if we've got support around us. So we create that around us with own mentors and our own coaches and we can help you guys and go through it as well. So if you need help with it, reach out. Where's the best place to contact this list? Speaker 2: (23:54) I'm Lisa tammany.com [inaudible] website. And you can contact us via that. You can see all our programs. We have our epigenetics program, which is what Neil was talking about there. So we go through this process, but we go through this with the lens of looking at your particular set of genes. A very an incredible program that we've talked about a couple of times and we are actually going to get onto doing some sessions on the genetics program that we have in the next few weeks. We've been saying it for a couple of weeks and the idea would be to get onto it, but it's actually a really amazing program that will give you insights into your genes, what they're doing, how they're expressing and what recommendations and trying to understand who the heck you are. This is the biggest power in this is not just the food lists and having lists of foods that you're going to, that, that are going to be good for your body and in times of the day that you should be exercising and what types of exercise. But it's also about how your mind works in relation to your genes and how you were, how you were made. You know, it goes right back through embryology when you, and your mom's tummy, how you developed, what we, what energy went into the different systems. And I won't go into it now because it's very, very detailed and scientific and we need our you know, probably five or six podcasts to get through it all. But we have a huge result. So this and we're just, Speaker 3: (25:20) I'm really my skill set in and finding your purpose easier. Cause once you know who you are, how goal setting process and, and the purpose process becomes so much easier because you've got the tools to really, really, really help you choose the right fork in the road. Speaker 2: (25:35) Yeah. And understand how you operate. You personally, what is it that your dominant hormones are and how is your mind set up for action? You know, and we know you know, Neil and I worked together and we have both crusaders and this is one of the epigenetic types biotypes and we both very, you know, mission driven and very on a mission all the time and in huge goals and things. And we know that other people operate differently. And we can as coaches now talk to them in a different way, motivate them in a different way because they need to hear different things and what we need cause we taught the person, if that makes sense. So we will be going into all that. If you want to chicken out or really you can help onto our website, at least the lisatamati.com Hit the programs button and you'll see our three programs, our online run training program, our epigenetics program, and our mindset Academy, which is all about mental toughness and developing war emotional resilience and mental toughness. So check those all out. Have a great Christmas guys is upon us account believers and if you're listening to this afterwards yeah, I'm sure we would've had great Christmas. Any last words you want to add to before we wrap up the holiday period? Enjoy the Christmas. Have a great new year guys, and enjoy Tom and your family and loved ones. Yeah, sounds like a bloody good idea to me. So you guys, yeah, Speaker 1: (27:00) That's it this week for pushing the limits. Be sure to write, review and share with your friends and head over and visit Lisa and her team at lisatamati.com.      

We live in a world where if you are a business leader, you “need“ to get your company on social media… Right? Not so fast. In this episode I talk about what types of companies should be utilizing social media to grow their businesses, and how to go about doing so. Enjoy!

To subscribe to the 'Grow Your Business' podcast, go here: Grow Your BusinessYears ago, 60 minutes article, talked about a grocery chain who had done a survey which revealed that the cost of keeping a current customer is a small fraction of the cost of acquiring a new customer.REALTORS have knows this for decades, and in fact many have built their business almost completely on referrals by past clients.Everything I’m going to talk about is based on one basic premise: That you provide an excellent service or sell an excellent product. For this to work, you need to start with happy customers. If you do a shoddy job, I can save you some time right now, nothing I say will help with that.First step is to simply ask for a referral at the right time. Whats the right time? When your customer is at their happiest. You’ve just shown them the fancy features on their new furnace, or gone over the paint job you just did. They are happy, and at their most agreeable state. That’s a great time to ask for a referral…. Make sure it’s a referral, not a lead….. I’ll explain the difference in another episode.Maybe they’ll give you a referral, maybe not. But they’re happy, so you’re happy, and you leave thinking they’ll send you business down the road. Right????Not so fast. There was a study done where they asked home owners this question: The agent you used to buy or sell your last home, would you use them again? 80% said YES.Follow up question: What was that agents name? 20% knew the answer.Buying or selling a house is arguably the most important financial step most people will ever make. Yet only 20% remembered their agent.So if 80% don’t remember them, do you really think they will remember you, just because you painted their house, shingled their roof or sold them a car? They need to be reminded about you and your excellent service.Entire systems have been creating to make it easier for real estate professionals to keep to a schedule of staying in touch with past clients. But those systems don’t need to be JUST for real estate agents.A little side note here: Studies have shown that letters sent in the standard #10 envelopes often receive the same level of attention and love associated with bills and notices.So if you’re going to send out personal touch-points, try using postcard-sized envelopes, which have a much higher opening rate.So, you can develop your own system, but as you add more clients to it, it might become confusing…..especially if you chose to send cards on the anniversary of your interaction with them…… so for example, 1 year AFTER they bought a new car, installed a new furnace, etc etc.Incidentally, you will WANT to send cards outside of the normal dates. Everyone gets Christmas cards, Easter etc…..Pick dates when no one else sends them. Check your own industry to see if they have a nationally recognized day, or send a card on the anniversary of your dealings with them. Their birthday (if you remember to ask), or other holidays which are not the usual days where people send cards.There is a system out there that has many of the answers and solutions for these kind of issues: SendOutCards canStart with one client and work up to an infinite numberAdd clients throughout the year, as your business growsYou select the number of touch-points per clientTheir cards are sent as postcards, with script style addressing, and faux postage stamps. Lets talk with a friend of mine, who is an affiliate with SendOutCards, Ted Vailas. I have a few questions for him on how this system works. Interv

Hospitals are the safest place to have your baby. Doctor’s are using evidence-based care. Right? Not exactly. In this episode, we get into the unreported side of birth so you know the full range of your choices from whether to be induced to understanding why what’s often the “normal”, standard of care might not be right for you. In this episode, we discuss:  Belief versus evidence-based care around due dates, labor and pain management choices The 4 qualities of a satisfying birth experience for Mothers An important practice to ensure a confident transition into Motherhood To join our Insatiable community, visit https://alishapiro.com/IC2019

Bottled-in-Bond. It’s one of the revolutionary moments of American history, but has also become near and dear to many bourbon drinkers with good reason. We covered the in and outs of bottled-in-bond with Bernie Lubbers back on Episode 089 and it's part of our Bourbon 101 podcasts. Since we know why bottled-in-bond is important, it’s time to find out who Bourbon Pursuit is going to claim as the best bottled in bond bourbon in 2019! We blind sample our way through 12 heavy weight contenders and put them in the Bottled-in-Bond Showdown. Who is going to be crowned champion? Listen and find out. Show Partners: * Hotel Distil on historic Whiskey Row is set to open October 29th in Downtown Louisville. Book now to experience it for yourself at HotelDistil.com. * The University of Louisville now has an online Distilled Spirits Business Certificate that focuses on the business side of the spirits industry. Learn more at uofl.me/pursuespirits. * At Barrell Craft Spirits, they spend weeks choosing barrels to create a new batch. Joe and Tripp meticulously sample every barrel to make sure the blend is absolutely perfect. Find out more at BarrellBourbon.com. * Receive $25 off your first order at RackHouse Whiskey Club with code "Pursuit". Visit RackhouseWhiskeyClub.com. * Distillery 291 is an award winning, small batch whiskey distillery located in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more at Distillery291.com. Show Notes: Elijah Craig Launching Kentucky Straight Rye Whiskey: https://www.instagram.com/p/B3wt1feHdlZ/ Amazon Gin: https://www.beveragedaily.com/Article/2019/10/21/Amazon-launches-its-own-spirits-brand-Tovess This week’s Above the Char with Fred Minnick talks about premium pricing. What is Bottled-in-Bond? Blind tasting of the following (in no particular order): Heaven Hill Bottled-in-Bond 7yr Henry McKenna Single Barrel Bottled-in-Bond George Dickel Bottled-in-Bond Old Bardstown Bottled-in-Bond Old Grand Dad Bottled-in-Bond 1792 Bottled-in-Bond Evan Williams Bottled-in-Bond Jim Beam Bottled-in-Bond JW Dant Bottled-in-Bond Early Times Bottled-in-Bond New Riff Bottled-in-Bond Wilderness Trail Bottled-in-Bond 0:00 I love bourbon, but I'm not ready to restart my career in be a distiller. I have a bachelor's degree and I want to continue to use those skills in the whiskey industry. So check this out. The University of Louisville now has an online distilled spirits business certificate that focuses on the business side of the spirits industry like finance, marketing and operations. This is perfect for anyone looking for more professional development. And if you ever want to get your MBA their certificate credits transfer into Ul's new online MBA program. Learn more about this online program at U of l.me. Slash pursue spirits. How fast can you go through like 15 Bourbons? I'd be done. Now if you aren't asking me so many questions. 0:55 Welcome back. It's Episode 224 of bourbon pursuit. I'm wanting to host And here's your weekly bourbon news roundup. Last Thursday, heaven Hill announced Elijah Craig is launching their Kentucky straight rye whiskey. This is made from heaven hills only right Nashville which is 51% rye, 35% corn and 14% malted barley, the same Nashville that you're going to see for Rittenhouse as well as Pikeville with an SRP of only 2999 Elijah Craig Kentucky straight rye whiskey will first launch unlimited markets of North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia and Oregon in January of 2020. Now, when you hear about a release like this, we typically hear about most people, especially in Kentucky, being kind of upset about its lack of market penetration. So we actually reached out to our contacts at heaven Hill to see what the response was. And this was a decision by the brands to focus on markets based on a variety of needs. This could be from building a brand on premise competitiveness and a particular market or too slow roll a product based on age inventory. For this release, there was no one single reason but you can read more about this post on Instagram with the link in our show notes. Jim Murray's whiskey Bible has announced that last week his top whiskey of 2020 was 1792 full per second was the 2018 William drew Weller and third was the 2018 Thomas HND, meaning that Sazerac swept all top three whiskeys of the world for Jim Murray's whiskey Bible. Now continue on the trend of Buffalo Trace, they are also releasing their next installment in the old charter oak series called Canadian oak. In late 2018, Buffalo Trace announced its old charter oak series, it's a collection exploring the different taste profiles of barrels obtained from trees grown in different countries, climates and soils. For this newest release, Buffalo Trace obtained a small number of barrels from Canada and filled them with mash number one. This is the same Nashville us for Buffalo Trace and Eagle rare Canadian oak trees differ from a American oak trees that they are harder and have tighter grain structure, which affects the bourbon as it ages. The old charter oaks Canadian oak was aged for 10 years and will be available in retail in late October. The suggested retail price will be 6999. While we're talking about new releases, let's not forget about angel's envy and their annual cask strength release. angel's envy cast drink begins West standard angel's envy bourbon, it's made with a Nashville of 72% corn, 18%, rye and 10% malted barley, aged first in new charred oak barrels, but finished in barrels at once held port wine. As these barrels are tasted throughout the year. A few are set aside to age longer MB bottled at cash drink for its special annual release. This year's release will clock in at 122.4 proof with seven different ages as port finished bourbon of 689 10 1314 and 15 years old, that are missing To create this final blend, the bottle will come in a packaged in a wooden Art Deco style box for a suggested retail price of around $200. And the last release we're going to talk about isn't actually bourbon. It's not actually even whiskey. It's a gin and it's called tow service. And it's only available in the United Kingdom, France and Germany. This is a big deal because the owner of this brand is none other than Amazon. Yes, Amazon is getting into the spirits business. And this is now available to order online@amazon.co.uk this is another one of those things that we may see as a small ripple but could potentially end up being a tidal wave years down the road. You can read more about this with the link to beverage daily com in our show notes. Bottled in bond. It's one of the revolutionary moments of American history but has also become near and dear to the hearts of many bourbon lovers and with good reason. We covered the ins and outs of bottle and bond with Bernie lovers back on episode 89, and it is also part of our bourbon one on one podcast on our website. But now, since we know why bottle and bond is important, let's move on to what bourbon pursuit is going to claim as the best bottled in bond bourbon in 2019. We take a total of 12 heavyweight contenders and put them in a blind and what we're calling the bottled in bond showdown who's going to pull ahead and become the champion this year? Well, just wait and find out. All right, let's get down to it. Here's Joe from barrel bourbon. And then you've got Fred Minnick with above the char. 5:36 Hi, Joe from barrell bourbon here, myself and our master distiller triple Stimson spend weeks choosing barrels to create a new batch. We meticulously sample every barrel make sure the blend is absolutely perfect. lift your spirits with barrell bourbon. 5:50 I'm Redman Aiken. This is above the char this week's idea comes from Patreon subscriber Brian Shabbat. He asks should bourbon enthusiasts stop complaining and embrace premium pricing for premium bourbon. MacAllan. 25 year old for $2,000 is acceptable. But 1500 for Pappy 20 is considered price gouging. Brian also wants to know what's the possible economic implications for premium pricing. Now this story really goes it's really goes back to the 1960s when bourbon is kind of changing its business model up until the 1960s. You saw bottled in bond bourbon and even straight bourbon is really kind of competing with scotch as a premium on the shelf even cognac so cognac would have been you know another brand he's would have been considered the creme de la creme and scotch and bourbon were kind of, you know, neck and neck scotch was also dubbed more blends they were so this was when scotch was predominantly a blended category. Now the 1960s scotch starts going toward a more premium ization and they focused on single malts, while bourbon decided to do things like lower their proof points from like 100 or 107, to 86 and 80. And they started becoming the everyday man's whiskey. And so they were basically setting the market up to take on the blue collar workers, the people who were fixing sinks and doing construction and in the military, everything that they were doing was really geared around people who had a budget. Well, scotch was focusing on the people on Wall Street and bankers and people who own businesses. They put a lot of effort into, you know, building this esteem. At the same time, they were also putting away whiskey. They were putting away a lot of whiskey, though at age up to you know, 50 years and today we see him coming on the market for a million or more at auction. Now today, bourbon is so popular that distilling have had to increase your prices to kind of deal with demand and it's often gets pushed back. And there's one brand that always comes out as unpopular in this conversation. And that's Pappy Van Winkle. Now, when we when Brian asked about 1500 dollars for Pappy 20 it always has to be pointed out that the distillers are not the one setting that price that is not the MSRP for Pappy Van Winkle. And so the argument can be made that the MSRP is for these premium Bourbons don't necessarily reflect what people are willing to pay. So the question is, should people increase their suggested retailers price? Yeah, I don't know. I think it's still pretty cool to have a glimmer of hope that maybe you can get a bottle of four roses limited edition for the MSRP of 100 or 150, or whatever it is versus 500 to 1500 that you'll find it in some retail stores, but it also gives bourbon a little bit of a black guy. As It's never good to increase prices 200 400 600% year after year after year, and that's essentially what's happening right now. So there is a way to increase prices, and I just don't know what the best way is. scotch on the other hand, doesn't seem to be short of those million dollar bottles anytime soon. And that's this week's above the char. Hey, if you have an idea for above the char become a Patreon subscriber and share with me your ideas you can check us out at bourbon pursuit on Patreon. Until next week, cheers 9:41 Welcome back to another episode of bourbon pursuit the official podcast of bourbon and today Yeah, yeah boy. We are the trio we're back here again with an awesome as can be a fun episode. But first, you know, I gotta say that shout out to hotel distil. This is where we're recording today. We're actually in the barrel room here and this is located on historical Whiskey row is going to be opening on November 1 here in downtown Louisville. It's going to be a place that has, you know, first we talked about it on the last podcast, it is used to be the home of JTS Brown. It's got an exciting history and it's now transformed into this beautiful beautiful space. So it's going to be designed to really ignite your passion for discovery and will be the anchor for levels revitalization and refinement of bourbon culture. You can book a your true authentic experience and stay at Hotel distil.com 10:31 So is it that is it is it is very nice. 10:34 Yeah, very sweet. Excited now I'm excited to kind of see what's going to happen if you're watching this on video they talked about so they haven't these barrels behind us and they've got taps on them they're gonna be having barrel aged tap cocktails like right here with inside of this room. So I'm kind of I'm kind of stuck. Yeah, they 10:48 will actually be aging in the barrel. They're going to be in like a sleeve or a bladder, because that's the only way you can technically do that legally. 10:58 Like Like a bottle of wine. So They'll 11:00 be they will be pre like Franzia. Yes, it's like the bag. 11:04 Yep, front front. 11:06 The back before 11:09 I've done it on a boat once or twice. Yeah. So if you've never played that game before, ask somebody that has a boat on the lake in front. Franzia. 11:17 Alright, so that's the bag. Let's go 11:19 All right, let's go. So what we're gonna do today is we're going to slap the bottle and bond This is going to be the bottled in bond showdown. So we are selecting what we can find as one of our favorites have 12 different bottle of bond every day and I think we got one that's outside of Kentucky we got one George decal, but the other ones these are all Kentucky. And you know, this was a combination of grabbing stuff in our basements heading to go into the liquor store and, and, and finding these and, you know, I think it's gonna be kind of fun to kind of go through this because, you know, Ryan, I'm the I'm going to test your knowledge real quick because you know, we've We've talked about bottle on the bottom on the show before we've had Bernie lovers on give folks an understanding of what the bottle and Bond Act and what it was really there for. Gosh, I 12:09 feel like that's a Fred question. I don't know. 12:12 I'm gonna put you on the spot here. Let's let's do flex some 12:14 civil so we'll get it we'll get him back. Okay. Well you know it has to be at least four years old right? 12:19 Huh? 12:20 It has to state the distilling season. Is that right? I don't know if it's 12:27 distilled in a singer to be distilled in a seagulls 12:29 Yeah. Okay. See I've already got it wrong keep going 100 proof obviously as being bonded warehouse now obviously. The what else am I missing? 12:41 So it has to be distilled at one distillery in one distilling? $1 one. Okay. And has to be 100 proof at least four years old. Gotcha. 12:50 Yep. So I hit them all. You 12:52 hit all the major points and then they need to disclose the the distillery and all that stuff where it's bottled. Yeah. And this is it. This is a Guys, I, I know we see this on the bottle and we look at it for like quality purposes. But I want people to realize how important the bottle and Bond Act of 1897 was it First of all, Grover Cleveland signed this into law. This was his last thing he signed in his in his first term. And he was the, you know, the bottle and Bond Act was really our very first consumer protection legislation as a country. So now we have all these protection measures to help us as consumers and it really begins with bottled in bond with the government trying to protect us from bad whiskey. And then, but medicinal circles and it's important to note that they've had a lot of backlash like the blenders and the rectifier. Canadian whiskey makers were very much against the bottle of Bond Act. So this was one of the first times that the Kentucky distillery community banded together for a single cause and that was to get this passed. Now they just Sue each other. 13:55 They still help each other here and there but they still reasonable This is a 14:00 true part of part of the game. Now the way I feel like I'm looking at the longest shot ski ever, like I feel like I'm about to do like my 21st birthday it is we've got we've got 12 different Bourbons that are lined up and these were, these were ones, you know, we've got one that is kind of the newest addition to this, which is the new seven year old bottle and bond. And you know, there was, it was funny because I was actually going trolling to the liquor store last night and I was I was actually flabbergasted. I was like, man, I forgot how many bottle of bond Bourbons there were out there. And then Natalie that is a great values to well, and that's what they usually are typically good values. But you know, some of the ones I selected, you know, I was going through and I was looking, you know, there were also you know, there's there's bottle of bonds that are coming from Oregon and other places. But I said let's focus on some of the stuff that's pretty regional that or should I say not regional, but pretty national can be found on a national level. at the same exact time. You know, there's also a lot of Bourbons out there that are hundred proof, but it doesn't actually say bottled in bond or bond. The word bond is not on the package. So I just overlooked it and said we'll go on that Yeah. And then you know probably there's there's probably two more that should be in here that just couldn't bring it to get our hands on it because this is Louisville and people go crazy because it's bourbon is the EH Taylor brands so the small batch and the single barrel are not a part of this big idea. I saw that bottle and I was going to bring it in but I was like, I'm not gonna share that those fuckers 15:25 I'm kidding go the value for giving me the other side of this is we didn't choose any of the highly allocated releases. You know, the old Fitzgerald spring and fall releases the Parkers 24 year bottom bond also we also didn't bring any media samples. So these are all things that we actually physically purchased and that's very important to note because most competitions are they get their whiskey from the supplier, so the distilleries will send it into the competition. So these are guaranteed all have came from a retailer. 15:58 Well, Justin full full disclosure this seven Hill bottle and bond did come from heaven Hill really this was the media sample they sent everything else though has been purchased by us in some way in some way shape shape or fashion it's a it all goes in the bourbon pursuit credit card 16:15 right that's right so so that's why we're not getting checked on this person. 16:21 Alright, so let's go ahead Well, we got we got 12 to go through so we'll dive in kind of start with the first kid I 16:27 remember we I said wanted to talk a little bit about the the 16:32 smell my glasses, so I'm just trying to make sure that there's the same because they're not number. First of all this tasting is is is flawed because we don't have the same glass for every one of them. So we will now have to like take into account some of them are neat pores are neat glasses. I would say we've got 95% majority Fiverr and the Glen Campbell and Karen but this is that this is close enough. 16:57 fault brought the nega Lazarus That's the only thing I can tribute it was the wrong glass. 17:02 But it's okay but so that's the it's the only thing and this is this is actually a pretty small flight for like a for like a blind tasting this is all blind we don't know what we know that these brands report but we don't know in what order and as we're tasting you know we're gonna find out what we gotta gotta eliminate all you gotta eliminate and everything but I think we should we should also give our notes to the audience as we're as we're thinking. 17:27 Absolutely. So we'll go with number one I you know, for me, I'm going to be excited to kind of see how this is going to go down because what, two years in a row, Fred's over there talking about Henry McKenna being the best there is in the world and yet now we're let's see, now we're going to now we're going to 17:43 that was in that was in a competition by the way, I was just one Judge of like, 40. Now I'm one of three. 17:51 We're narrowing it down. We're making the competition better though. 17:54 The first one, I'm definitely picking up some grainy notes. 18:00 These are gonna be Yeah, they're all gonna be young. 18:02 So when they're gonna, you know, there's there's definitely going to be some 18:06 that are. Most of 18:08 them I'd say are probably for younger, right, you know, we brought in. They can't be younger than for for older. Yeah, yeah. So the one thing that I think is we're going to find unique as we go through here is there's gonna be one that's going to be sort of an outlier. And that's going to be the 1792. Because the bottle and bond that the 1792 pick is actually a store selection, right? So it is a single barrel, it's a one off, it's not going to be some of the the normal 1792 UCO. Let's just 18:36 take that I know what do we want to do are we want to rank them one through three, or we want 18:40 to say best, I'd say you pick your top three. 18:43 Let's pick our top three. Okay, so by tasting number one, I'm eliminating it from my round, it's just too grainy. It's very alcohol forward. 18:52 If you were to if you were to try to pinpoint number one 18:54 and number two, number two, if it's not the decal one 18:59 I'll be sure Then you shouldn't be at San Francisco anymore. Yeah, 19:04 that's number two's nose. Yeah, 19:06 that's, that's deco all right? Yeah. But you know, and the thing is like, this was a the decal is a recent entrant to the market. And I think it's it's gone over fairly well with the community of people that are, you know, getting into it trying Tennessee bourbon and stuff like that. And so there is an opportunity to actually have George tickled, so be a part in here. 19:27 So what's our teen year in it? 19:28 So this is so this George decal doesn't have an age statement on it. They do have it they have a 13 year release. Okay. And this is the non age dated version though. Yeah. 19:40 actually enjoy it. 19:41 Yeah, I mean, one one thing I would say about decal Is it is it is often flawed and competition because it that particular note, that kind of like morality, the Flintstones a note really can stand out in a bad way for a taste Yeah, so if you're in if you're tasting a sea of things that are very Carmel forward and vanilla, and you get that note it can be very off putting or it can be very good and can help it stand out and yeah, so it's like it's one of those it's either love it or hate it in competition. 20:16 Yeah, that one I didn't get the vitamin D on the front end but it's really there on the finish 20:21 on I would recommend I would recommend Also make sure you rent when you get like some of that lingering, 20:26 lingering taste in your mouth and kind of rinse it out. Yeah, I could see that. I mean so frightening number one was read. 20:32 Just Yes. 20:33 I would say if I'm if I'm and this is the hardest part of a blind tasting is picking out what it is right. But I would say it's definitely one of the younger ones. I probably put it in a league of like JW dance or, you know, maybe, maybe the Evan Williams but I don't know. 20:52 Okay, kind of the month ago, it had like a cinnamon spice finish that I usually get an old old markdowns, maybe that could be way off. 21:00 I'll tell you to it it is like, if you're focusing on what it is instead of right what is best in the flight, then you're not then you're not focusing on the tasting. So I will will start I would recommend like trying to like figure out what they are later because that can actually be fun and I'm already 21:18 moving on to number three is notebooks like a notebook so you can pick one of them just said negative negative that's how I that's how I did it. 21:26 Now I just moved on to number three now I love the nose on number three I thought of this that's great care Marburg can move forward. Yeah, nice to the taste ended up being a little I don't want to say bitter but kind of thinned out and a little astringent towards the end. So I like you give the thumbs up in the nose. The taste is like in the middle and the finishes kind of 21:47 blow I actually think the the the palates got it like this kind of a cool lady. That's got like a KoolAid aftertaste. 21:55 Yeah, like fake sugar. Yeah, like, kinda it's process flight. Kinda we hack Kool Aid packs like when you take a Crystal Light pack and just 22:05 you just spoon Did you forgot to 22:07 put water in it? 22:08 Three put three is a maybe 22:12 it's a maybe 22:14 it's a maybe it's a maybe when we go down here and 22:17 there's a chance 22:18 there's it there is a chance that it could it could go somewhere. Yeah. So Fred kind of talk about, you know, when we got all these bottles of bonds up here. I know you've got a you've got a hard on from McKenna a little bit, but kind of 22:33 blind tasting candy. There was 22:36 help. That's what he told 22:37 me. It'd be like a $10,000 scotch. Wow, it's just one vote in that I'm bad at them. 22:43 You know, I guess Fred, you know, one one new entrant that we actually have up here that I think is might hopefully blow some socks off. And it's kind of a riff, new riff, right, 22:54 focus on what it is focus on the whiskey. No, 22:56 no, no, but I kinda want to talk about you know, new riff and You know how they got late You guys are just like we're trying to work here. He's like 23:08 now I'm gonna think it's a new roof now. 23:10 Well, I mean, I just kind of want to talk about you know, their bottom and bond, you know, coming into the market and actually having that be their first entrant. Right and I think wilderness trail did the same 23:18 exact number four was new rip and while he's talking about it just happened to be it now. 23:25 Now that I actually do like number four, I gotta days like new roof. 23:31 I like butterscotch kinda like no 23:33 it's like he planted 23:35 like a cinnamon note on the back of 23:37 their cinnamon but it's like a lot of 23:40 it it's got that fried pie crust that I love fried pie crust man you got you got some awesome tasty between you and Ryan I I gotta I gotta up my game on it that's for sure. You've got to eat a lot. That's why do eat 23:52 a lot. The thing is, is none of its fake. I know people want to say like it's it's hate but this is like I mean I've really trained and stuff And really tried to connect to everything I've ever tasted. And it all goes back to when I'm trying to get better from Iraq and I was using mindfulness techniques and tasting and I would use to one of my therapy things was I would break down what barbecue potato chips tasted like and felt like on my tongue and that would help keep me grounded and I just applied that to bourbon and so that's kind of been my my technique. 24:25 So start off with going down your local local grocery aisle finding different kinds of chips and pulling the real thing Yeah, and you mean you got to gain 10 pounds automatic 24:36 the risky take 24:37 grab like 10 varieties of fried apple pies, you know those? 24:40 Well, I'll grab 10 different varieties of like hot pockets and we'll start 24:43 right then you're born You 24:46 know, I'm not a hot soccer guy now back in college Pop Tarts and like crucibles Yeah. 24:50 You know, I used to be I did love toasters turtles because you get to design your own art on there. Yeah. 24:56 Oh man. But the thing is, is like with the Pop Tarts like I only go two flavors. It's brown sugar, cinnamon and then the wild berry like those are the only two that I would actually go for beyond that, like I'm not a strawberry jam person like, clones 25:09 never really did like number four by the way. Yeah, four is really good. Okay, there's a check for me. Where's the checkbox? Yeah, 25:15 going to five Alright, moving on to five here like that. 25:18 It's hard to analyze color in here because it's so dark. Yeah. But 25:24 yeah, I mean you got we got it. We got a variety variety really grainy. 25:29 You mean on the nose? It's getting a little too grainy for him. 25:32 It also but it does have like, it does have like that. 25:37 You go to the fairgrounds and they're serving the cotton candy you go to the cotton candy booth is 25:42 that cotton candy so I got some raw notes or something. I mean, when I just had a taste and I think you kind of get some of that that cotton candy and a little bit on the back of it. You get some grape Kool Aid. 25:53 Yeah, it does kind of kind of funky. A lot of raw notes on that. For me anyways. 25:58 So all that's pretty Though I'll ask you all When was the last time you all had some some of these other bottle of bonds that are just you know, regular kind of shelf stuff so like old Bardstown old grains. 26:11 Like this is old Bardstown. Yeah, you think? Yeah, I think this is old Bardstown. Number five. 26:16 Yeah, I now think it is. 26:18 Because it has that like a particular oak note in there that I get from their, from their stuff. 26:23 I mean, I've always early times for me like an always 26:27 early, early times. I mean it's, 26:30 I haven't spent a lot of time with early times. 26:34 But of what we have up here that I've been drinking the shit out of his new riff and I've been I've been drinking so much of their cash drink stuff, you know? That was so good. It is I it's 26:48 It is incredible. What they've been able to accomplish. Okay, so we go to the 26:53 glass, it's not 26:54 a Glencairn. Well, I think we we definitely made a mistake of not labeling these glasses either because now me and you are literally like three four little accounting like what's we're on number six already and we're trying to like go through these yeah 27:08 so I do like the nose on I do like this a lot 27:12 this is probably my favorite knows this far everything you want in America knows oh my god 27:17 that's good that's kind of full package right there yeah that's a full package that's a that's a check check plus from what what else 27:23 so let's when we say full package What are you what are you putting that in reference to what is your What is your baseline that in bourbon I'm talking about in life in life? What's your baseline for a full package? Can you 27:33 want me to just hit solid Are you referring to package 27:37 Gosh, last time I'm drinking with you all and again 27:40 often by now maybe I'm so glad we picked this over like lawsuits or something. They were like texting last night and I like put my phone down for like an hour and I come by or 30 texts and I'm like, we're not doing these. We're gonna do the bomb bomb. 27:53 It'll be much more files wave. 27:55 So anyway, my full package will be like what I kind of think of it is like it just hits the checkboxes Got the nose, it's got the flavors. And when I think of flavor, like it's nothing that's it's nothing that's crazy. It's nothing that is off the wall. It's a one off like it is it is hitting, you know, most of the high notes that you get on a bourbon flavor will you've got caramel, you've got oak, you've got pepper, you've got some of those things, and it still lingers just a little bit now all these being 100 proof. We're not going to see something that's going to sit there and just like the finishes, keep going and going and going, right? I mean, I think we will, maybe we will, but I would think with 100 proof and I'm not going to act like I've got a refined palette by any means. But I think that I typically only see that happening with barrel proof whiskey is something that like I could still sit back like 30 seconds later and it's still like those flavors are still coating my mouth my tongue 28:49 sometimes I get on that. If you have like, I've had a lot of good for roses, like the hundred proof. What is it? 28:58 Single barrel single barrel, sorry. VOB SV 29:01 Yeah, that like, you can tell the spices from the grains and not from alcohol and the finish just kind of lingers on there. And so that I really liked that one. The finish was a little flat for me, but it hit all the checkboxes on 29:15 Friday night solid six had some layers to it. I would say revisit that one. We like when we're done here, because that's definitely a contender. 29:23 Yeah. Hopefully we're not doing like confirmation bias on each other. And we're just like, Oh, yeah. Oh, no, 29:28 I disagree with you. I will totally tell you. Yeah, but that and I know that Ryan will be quick to say, Yeah, fuck you, you know. So but in his own way, 29:39 own heartwarming way that thumbs down. 29:41 You know, he'll be like, well, I don't really. I don't really agree with you on that. But I know where you're coming from, though. Yeah, Fred. I agree to disagree with you. And then Kenny will be like, well, I just don't get that. Yeah. 29:55 It doesn't have 29:56 to be that or I'll say it. Let's change this. Let's change the subject real quick. 29:59 What does that mean? The next one, what 30:00 does that look like? But seriously on to the next one? 30:03 I got my first Neagle, SB to number seven, I think we all got new glasses changing everything. You know if I'm 30:09 gonna if I'm going to go on a limb if we're gonna if anybody's gonna guess on one thing I'm going to say number seven is gonna be the old granddad bottle and bond. I just I think it's, it's okay. It's basic. It's either me that or it's Evan Williams. It's one of the other, but I feel like it's just, it's cool. It's like there but I don't think 30:26 like I don't think it's all green. I don't either know, this. I think this is 1792 that's what I was gonna say from the nose. It's got that you talking about Nana's guys that you're bananas. 30:36 You know, as there's one thing that Ryan brought up a second ago when you talk about four roses, you know there's a there's a few distilleries out there that that don't come out with a bottle and bond product for roses and wild turkey or or two of them that kind of come up to mind. 30:51 You want to know why? 30:52 Yeah, I'd love to know why the books 30:54 on the distilling season, actually and not bringing them in is very difficult. So like knob Creek, which is 100 proof that could have six different distilling seasons in the the actual audit of a bottle of bond it's actually very costly. Heaven Hill has it down because they've been doing it for so long. And they, you know, they don't really change a lot of those older methods. 31:16 Do they still audit for vault and bon 31:19 Oh, if they if the federal government wants to audit, they will audit and occasionally they will come in and out and they what they do they just look at paperwork, that's all they do. You know, it's not like they're going in there and 31:28 taking dramaturgy. Yeah, they're not doing anything like that. 31:31 But it's, it's it's pretty fascinating 31:34 to see. Really getting finished, kind of lingering. 31:38 So do you think do you think that creating a bottle and bond product is it just more paperwork nowadays at the end of the day, and maybe that's why wild turkey for roses and people like that, just don't worry about it. 31:50 It always comes down to position in the marketplace. And when you look at where bottle of wine Bond was 15 years ago, heaven Hill owned it. Nobody was getting near it. No one cared. Then Bernie lumber starts kind of striking striking the bar to me he changes he changes. That man changed the perception of the bartender community for bottle of bond. And then so other people started tacking on the new distiller started coming on. They're like we want to be bottled bond, we want to be old school. And then people like brown Forman said we need to get back into bottle the bond cc early times. You know, you see all kinds of efforts from a lot of places and people like four roses and wild turkey have always been about four roses and wild turkey. You know, so they don't want to necessarily get and kind of like a categorical lump with those particular brands. And maybe they will maybe they will and I don't know, but Wild Turkey has kind of been very anti 100 proof, you know, so the 100 it for them. It's comes out their one on one absolutely like their entire branding is around one on one. Yeah. And that's very specific. Absolutely. 33:05 Yeah, I think ball and bonds are like perfect for cocktails by the way to like 100. Like, you know, it's just it's a lot of them are young enough and like and there's enough proof there that they stand up to a lot of sweet ingredients 33:20 and like the nose on a it is. It's really nice. 33:23 And the other thing about the cocktail side is that yes, it's got enough proof that keeps it there but you know the bottle and bond this market of what we're looking at, we're looking at anything from a $15 bottle up to a $50 bottle I think 50 is the high when I was going through this so wilderness trail bottle and bond is the highest near it was 50 I believe it was between the Evan Williams bottle of bond and the Jim Beam bond and maybe the JW dan, as hitting some of the the lower lower price point therapy. Medic. Medic. Medic Ryan just Ryan just choked out over here. 33:57 Yeah, I'm trying to spit but it went too far down. No point of return. 34:03 date was very green forward to me. And it had like kind of like an undercurrent of like develop grain like an cornbread, which is a note I often get in some of the beam product. I've got a real nice like cornbread like a like a touch of like honey butter on it. 34:19 See, the thing is I actually kind of still enjoy this one. There is there's something about it where I didn't like it finished. The finish is still there for me. I don't know. I'm just gonna go the check on that one, Brian, 34:30 and I don't like it. So it didn't matter. 34:32 Well, no, I don't know. Just, there's only it's only a 33% vote over here. So you know, that's how it is. That's right. 34:40 All right. So number nine. Number nine. We were rolling through these awful quickly, aren't we? 34:45 When you got 12 to get there? 34:46 Yeah, we can have two and so on. And so I got another question I'll throw at you all because I remember this from I think was in Houston bourbon society or one of the other was you know, 34:57 when it comes to my tastings, and I'm trying to be analytic I hate when people fucking talk to me. So this is like, throw me on. Focus hit me. Can you shut up? Can we but it may be terrible, but it's true. Let's let him have a 35:10 hard I'll try the zone. Okay, all right, right on 35:13 I'm not gonna taste what you asked a question. Go ahead, 35:15 we gotta gotta keep the conversation going, right? We got to keep the listeners engaged here, right? 35:19 But you can ask Jessica I like close the door and I'm like, I'm writing. I'm doing this let me allow, you know, 35:25 we gotta we gotta make you break out of the mold here. So you're hanging out with us. You don't wear mascots anymore. Right? So we're making the breakout you 35:32 fucking hot out there too. I don't have to be on stage. So. 35:36 So. So there was I think it was a question that brought up by Wade. You know, we love Wade friend of the show. He's got a lot of bourbon knowledge out there. And and he said, you know, is it true or false that is every warehouse, a bonded warehouse. It comes down to the law. 35:53 They not everything's stored in a warehouse, but in terms of like, you know, they've been Pay they have to have it It cannot be in a non bonded the government has to know where it is. And it is it is very much on the watch list now is it a marked bonded warehouse? No, no I mean there there's there was a artists in Kentucky arts and distillery was aging in containers shipping containers for a long time and then they were aging outside for a long time and they would later be Jefferson's the growth growth product but the government knew what those were and they had to be that paperwork had to be submitted. 36:44 Okay, well see there's an LG 36:46 even have to have like a bonded Kenny and I've rented this like when when you buy do a transfer and bond from 36:52 one to another. You have 36:54 bonded transfer like so much now. This 36:56 isn't bond. This isn't anything that you have like Can I just go got, I got an f1 37:01 fit no one comes in and inspects it per se, but, but the paperwork has to be there. And if it's not, then you know, they get and when that audit comes, which the audits don't come, you know, they don't always come so like you could get away with, you know, doing that and, and I know people who, who distill, you know, illegally and then had a distillery and they added their old stuff into it. That was illegal. 37:25 But it happens. It does happen. So I'm going to go on a limb here, and I'm going to say number nine, it might be my least favorite of everything we've tried so far. 37:36 I really like the nose. But Gosh, the the finish on this, it just tastes like grass and, like, dirt. I don't know 37:46 it. Yeah, I'm just, I'm just not a fan of it. I'm ready to move on to 10 Yeah, I mean, it was just like, okay, can this one be over because I can't deal with it anymore. I don't know. We might burn a bridge there. But you know, it's just not there for me. 37:58 You got to stop worrying about the bridge. Yeah yeah they're engineers 38:04 I don't hate it as much as you guys but it's not it's not a contender for me there it's grainy Scott alcohol undertones to it got some sweetness but it's not it's not it's not an end of the world bourbon like it's not making me mad like you 38:23 I mean he's fuming yeah right here 38:24 I am off my rocker right now just going crazy. All right, number 10 yeah my guess moving on to number 10 we're we're rolling through these, I guess the thread for you Do you do these tastings a lot? Like how often or how fast can you go through like 15 Bourbons. From forest to still Bull Run distillery whiskeys are using some of the best water in the US. They're also experimenting by agent them in different types of barrels including cognac Madeira and be known to our barrels to their whiskeys are being featured by rackhouse whiskey club in their October box made from 96% corn Bull runs American whiskey is the lightest and sweetest product they offer and has very little barrel character to it. A company that in the rackhouse whiskey club box is IP No, no more Finnish whiskey. It's the same American whiskey but finished in French oak barrels. You really have to try these two side by side to see what barrel aging can do. And you can do that by checking out rackhouse whiskey club, their whiskey the Month Club on a mission to uncover the best flavors and stories that craft distilleries across the US have to offer rockhouse boxes ship out every two months to 40 states go to rackhouse whiskey club com to check it out. And try these unique whiskeys use code pursuit for $25 off your first box. What defines distillery to 91 Colorado whiskey is it spirit passion permeates every sip since day one distillery to 91 distillers from grain to barrel to bottle by hand, distinctive Colorado whiskey, utilizing grains from the Colorado planes and water collected from Pikes Peak reservoirs. 91 Colorado whiskey is handmade the Colorado way. Everything matters. To 91 Colorado whiskey has earned bushels of national and international awards for its spirits with the unique character and the flavor of a bygone era. Named world's best Bry in 2018 by World whiskey awards, seven liquid gold from Jim Murray's whiskey Bible to 91. Colorado whiskey embodies the traditions of the past, married with the boldness of the future. Find a bottle near you at 291 Colorado whiskey.com write it like you stole it, drink it like you own it. Live fast and drink responsibly. How fast can you go through like 15 Bourbons? I'd be done now if you aren't asking me so many questions. 40:47 No, but I'm pretty quick. Like I don't. It depends on what I'm doing. Like if I'm doing it. I'm doing it in competition. It depends on the competition. I have to adhere to the rules. I'm doing it for myself. My own little fucking thing I do whatever it is whatever it is I do or I'm just trying to taste you know the big part is is like do I have someone there helping me because I don't always have someone helping me and it's hard to pour for yourself and I mean we do 200 products difficult yeah but I can you know I usually try to spend two minutes with the glass thing is I my whole thing is I want to give I want to give every glass its chance you know it's not you know someone put a lot of time and attention and effort to make it if I'm going to taste it in analytically I need to give that same kind of time and attention at least 41:38 if you do something different you you tastings multiple times if you give it a rating, right, 41:42 that's right. I will I will taste three times because right now I'm just coming off a cold memory. I texted you guys yesterday that I lost my palate. I was like I don't know if I can do this. I lost my palate. I woke up I went out that's good. Anyway, bars and found 41:55 it. I feel like we're on a level playing field and now 41:58 we're down Last night, I wouldn't read it is late. I went out with drinking with my friend and I woke up this morning. I'm back, baby. It's like all that whiskey, like, cleared it. It was like so I'm just coming off the three festivals and I've been pretty worn down and now I'm back. And I mean today I could tell it was back but, but, you know, if you have an onion, if you whatever you have for breakfast, influences your palate, our surroundings influences. Right now we're on we're in a construction area that that little bit of, you know, dust smell that's out there can influence what you're picking up. The lights can have something the fact that someone's saying, you know, talking out there can influence I mean, there's so many influences so that when I'm actually tasting by myself, I like to be in a kind of like as much of a soundproof room as possible. No music, nobody bugging me. And it's just me and the glass. You can do a whiskey quickie can take three days to 42:57 give it a thumbs down 43:00 The way you all do, that's great. 43:01 And I guess I'll kind of give you I'll throw one back at you here, Fred, because, you know, we, we catch some heat every once in a while because people think that, oh, 60 seconds that's not long enough for whiskey review in and I kind of go on the other side of that and I'm like, well, soon as you taste something you kind of realize if you like it or not, 43:19 yeah, how many times does it take? Like, do you ever come back and you're like, 43:23 yeah, there's no way there's there's not actually as many how many times I would think that you went from something that you're just like, this is like a 65 to 95. Right? Not that big not understand we're not scoring it on a on a on a, on a point scale here. We're just saying like, thumbs up middle ago. Thumbs down, 43:40 right. So there have been 43:44 there been a few that went from like 80 to 85 or 88. Something like that. 43:53 Just a few points, then yeah, 43:54 I mean, it's not it's never really, you know, too much but It is there. And you know the big thing I think, you know, we have to what you have to what you have to determine as now that you all are kind of getting in the critic role is like what is your base? What is your base? And for me, my base has always been Evan Williams Black Label. That's an 86 point whiskey. You know and the thing is is like when someone rates that when someone says that is 60 points or 45 points or something, you're essentially saying it's undrinkable. Evan Williams Black Label is very drinkable. And you know, it can be enjoyed sip, it can be a cocktail, it's it's very, you know, versatile and like that is my base. So if I if I find myself in a situation where I am being very low, I like I was I was writing some stuff really, really low for a long period I went back to taste Evan Williams Black Label to make sure I was not crazy crazy. And I was like, I was like No, I'm right. Because these are not better than Evan Williams Black Label and it was like it was the one that did it for me it was like three years ago it was Eagle rare 17 year old and and then that also the Parkers heritage came out that was really, really bad. And I was like, God, I mean, I'm about to write these two things under an ad. And it was like, that's like really, really low for for those two products. And so I went back and taste that my base and it was like, Okay, yeah, I feel firm in that. So you have to like come to your base of like, what is your throne? What what barely makes your thumb up? And then what barely makes your thumbs down that that will always help you as as a reviewer, because you have to have something to lean on. Because if you know, you know you, you want to be consistent. That's the main thing. Absolutely. Thanks to you our basis and McKenna 46:02 realize like if it's better than here McKenna we like, yeah, 46:06 it's not, then it's true. That's true. I mean, that's that's kind of what started us down our path of launching pursuit series was like a well, if this is better than here, McKenna will do this. Yeah. And so we had a first barrel sample and that's for you. Well, that's, I mean, good for you. That's another story here or there. But I kind of want to talk about maybe 46:21 I should flip the podcasts on YouTube about why you started. 46:26 Well, we can we can we can definitely do a podcast about that one. 46:29 I did that last night. But then I was like, I don't want to 46:33 sell but it's all about a hotel to stall 46:34 and they won't be self promotion. When I'm asked questions. It's good. God, 46:38 by the way, before we go to this number 10. Yes. And I was I was I was I put check check. plus, plus, I was away. I was really, I enjoyed number 1010 46:49 was very woody for me. And see, that's me. I like 46:54 my pain. And I'm just I'm writing that and one of these ones that Fred doesn't like his hitter McKenna. Like 47:01 getting old so no so here so this is this is I'm not getting that So the one thing here about here McKenna is that it's a single barrel right? It's nothing that is it's batch it's not it's not celaire age it's not whatever it is. It is it is a single barrel offering it's nothing else like it you know we have the opportunity to catch up with Josh Hey for one time and talk about after it one San Francisco and say like, Listen, we all pick and cherry barrels like we all just sending two bottles that you knew that are three bottles that you knew that were just like Primo pristine, like going to knock the socks off. And he said he said Kenny This is exactly what happened. I make one phone call down to the warehouse. You know right now we've all been in the warehouse at heaven Hill. There's just pallets stacked up just boxes and things are moving everywhere. made a phone call. said hey, I need you to take three bottles out of a box. Here's the address the ship them to. That's it. There was there was no cherry picking. There is nothing like that. 47:59 Henry McKenna won Best bourbon the year before 48:02 Yes, I wouldn't believe that but like everyone you talked to it heaven Hill had the same exact story like it same exact like it's like they fed it to them like this. Well we need to do 48:12 I went back in the judges and you know what, when we unveiled the bottles, all the bottles for the same barrel number and, and you know so that makes it that makes that a little bit more believable is because they were they said it came from one case and you know as far as I know they case up their their barrels all the same, they don't intermingle. Yeah. And so that is that is the only thing I can think of, and also the year before they won with with Henry McKenna. And the second thing is what nobody ever wants to give any credit to is that there are more than 40 judges there from around the world, the greatest palettes in the world and I'm not just saying that because Guys, you're on it. But like I'm talking about people who run the hotels in Macau, people who run Wynn Las Vegas these are the these people are ultra respected for their palates. And they are human guess what they think is a honey barrel at heaven Hill. Could be a shit turd 49:25 over there. 49:26 Yeah. I mean, I gave two years in a row on my panel. I did not metal Pappy two years in a row. And you know, YP is you know Pappy is good. I mean, I didn't metal it. So what does that say? What does that say? I mean, you don't know how the You don't know how the judges are going to react. And you don't know what panel they're going to get on. If they're on my panel, man. Like with my panel, 49:56 we submitted pursuit series and Fred was like, I didn't even get that on my panel. Yeah. 50:01 So you never you never have any idea. 50:03 So like, you know, so that I you know, there's there'll be two 300 Bourbons that come in. There's other judges I can't you know, and they split them out. And yes, they do make me drink vodka. 50:14 Oh god. Oh, you poor thing. The fourth thing, by the way, thanks for you making the sacrifice for doing that as well. You 50:21 bet 11th amazing. 50:24 11 so 11 I did a check minus that was good, but it wasn't all the way there for 50:28 me. Yeah, I thought was average for me. 50:30 I love 11 a lot. I'm already on 12 50:34 Yeah, I got some like floral Really? Because I'm the exact opposite. I am I'm unique. I'm putting it 12 is as one of the bottom of the buckets for me. 50:44 I don't know what it I'll try to 50:46 try to it smells like floor sweeping. 50:49 Yeah, I'm not I'm just not a throw up packets. 50:51 Like Can you talk about 50:52 I usually talk about that when I talk about rye whiskey that I always get this note with some rye whiskeys of of if you recall. Back in grade school and somebody would like he had a classmate that puked on the floor and you had a janitor that wouldn't put the shavings on top of it that's always a note for somehow that I always get off stuff. 51:10 Yeah that's that's a real note that green hand whiskey had that note for me 51:17 I don't like I don't like it enough to put them on top three so 51:21 so i think i think it Now it's time we go ahead but you we need to replace like your top five retail taste your tops for sure anything you got a checkbox or a yes or whatever it is that you go through I use arrows 51:35 I use arrows and like I'll do like one arrow if I'm excited about two arrows if I love it three arrows if I'm like, about to go in the room with it, you know, 51:45 there you go. I tell you what, you know I went to I went back to number three and like three is just like coming back from from 12 the kitchen just got like super caramel knows. I put a maybe check box next to it doesn't mean anything. me here yet as we keep going, 52:02 I left threes nose. 52:06 Three is got too much. It's over early for me. threes over early would mean he was over early. So like, think of herbs like deal. Oregano. Sometimes those are candy, some medicinal herbal. It's a no for me threes out now. 52:26 Yeah, that's pretty good. I get that I'm still kind of there. I don't know for me I'm still kind of there on it. But I'm going to exit for me. Well, I think that 52:34 if we need to report who's reporting for us we do not need a report. 52:37 There is there is way too much out here that we do not need a report. So I'm moving I'm going to go between like 3468 and 10, maybe 11. And I'll choose my top three out of that. 52:53 fours and for me from the nose. 52:55 I want to say it's one dimensional, but maybe we've gone through this 15 times. There's there's something that a taste that just doesn't have it there for me. And for me I'm looking for I'm looking for caramel I'm looking for oak, I'm looking for some of those things and for just doesn't have it there for me. So I'm gonna I'm gonna go ahead and just kind of knock that one off my lips pulling for out of your list. I'm pulling for my 53:18 lot. It's in his top five Remember that? No, well, that's still good. Like, I mean, something 53:24 they might have even though they knew what it was. Anyway, I have to I had to know. 53:28 I think I think you know, you're right. I think it was too easy to take it out. I'll go back to it. Be only because I think it definitely deserves to be up there. It was too easy to pick it out. 53:44 And it is bourbon. It is bourbon. 53:47 And I guess you know, I'll look it to you guys and kind of kind of pose this question to you as a stock start depleting as you know, higher aged whiskies available in the market or not very anymore really the one thing that we see that's very common is we see 10 to 14 and 15 year old Tennessee product that is now available Do you think that's going to help change some consumers mind about their about actually having you know very aged product that's in the market versus something that's only like four to six years old? I mean, 54:21 what help Fred and then they've given barrels kind of proven that there's some really good stuff how many Yeah, I think I think barrel bourbon is an anomaly. They are such good blenders. Yeah. And they blend out a lot of that really unsavory note that I find in some medical 54:38 product but honestly, I just put a check plus next to deco like it was just it's too good. I don't know maybe. I know most of these pretty much all these except that one coming from Kentucky but there is there is something about it. That I think most people if you've never had that kind of product before, you gotta give it a try. Because if you haven't and you you just immediately Oh, Tennessee screw that I'm not going to drink it and you haven't tried it, then you're not really giving it a fair chance and a fair opportunity because there's there's a lot of good products that 55:09 that you can't get a question for both of you 55:11 know, here we go. 55:12 How do you put when you're tasting? Like I try to surround my mouth? I'm looking at my spit cup in comparison to Ryan's and it's like 55:22 oh, Kenny's been drinking the whole time empty. Yeah. Well, I mean, my mind is full. 55:30 I mean, I put a lot of my mouth to kind of surround How much do you put in your mouth to? 55:34 To find out before we talk no leaders around? 55:37 I'm doing I'm doing baby pores over here. Right? I'm just doing baby pores. It's just enough to like, maybe coat the tongue. I think I think what you're looking for is like an overall like, are you chewing it kind 55:49 of thing. So this is very important to me as a taster. Like I have to make sure that because if you just put a baby poor on there, you're getting a small snippet of what that was. He is Now you all been doing this long enough I don't have to worry about you you know discrediting at some because of a mouthful perspective but mouth field to me is it's so important that's why I like to make sure I can at least fill it down my jaw line 56:14 but there's also I think something that is you also miss by by also not consuming it and being able to say like okay if we spit it out are you missing something? Well 56:24 you know keep in mind I have to when I'm doing this I don't like 1500 so I I'd be dead which I know some people would like that but it's not going to happen 56:34 I got talking to him over here 56:37 I got my top three 56:38 you got your top three already I went out on a tangent here 56:42 and yeah, I'm still okay I'm going back to number six because I had a check check plus i probably doesn't mean actually going to go back to it but 56:48 yeah, I'm with you on six it's checks all around. 56:52 Good stuff. Missy when I when I do take a little baby poor though I still I still try to get it in my jaw line. I still chew a little bit Try to have a cover my tongue Yeah, but I also am not the way that it's just like it's not like a full like quarter round so my mouth either right it's I've got to have just enough that I can savor the flavor be able to get it to the to the point where I'm like actually chewing on my back molars 57:18 but other than that four and six are are wanting to for me or in that they're right there. I have a run off between seven and 11 and I need to be removed from from this I need you to like you need to be kicked off the panel. No, I need I need I need to be I need these to be given to me where I don't know what they are. is what I'm saying. 57:38 Well, you don't know what they are. 57:40 No, I know what they are. I know this is 11 57:42 right? I know this seven. Alright, well turn around or put your hands above your eyes and just give them to 57:48 get over here. sevens on the other glass. I'm already going to know Yeah, 57:52 it doesn't need God this is it. This is how I do things like if like if I get like really tied to a particular one. So now now what I have Do I have to like assess this from? Like, what I like more about it and so 58:05 I'm mouse like tingling right now. Yeah, he got again shot. 58:09 I need to find out which I like more seven or 11 and we may have like a tie. Well, 58:14 I don't like either, so I'll solve that for you. 58:17 There we go. No, I'm kidding. It's a it's a consensus, pursuit consensus. You know, sometimes you go back to something and you taste it. You're like, maybe I didn't realize I like that as much as the first time. 58:28 We're all drinking. 58:30 Yeah, maybe. 58:31 So I'm going to I'm going to go with 11 over seven. Due to a berry, berry accentuated note that I happen to love. Bananas. Not bananas. 58:45 What is it? 58:47 No. marzipan is not marzipan. 58:51 It's it's cornbread. 58:51 Like a like but a particular like the Gypsy cornbread not like the like the sweeter cornbread. So I'm going with 11 59:00 So my, my, my pics are four, 59:05 six and 11 59:09 four, six and 11. Okay, so we got Fred. 59:12 I didn't put that in order. You want me to order that? 59:13 Nope, that's fine. So Fred at four, six and 11. Ryan, you got your top three. 59:17 I have four, 59:19 six and 10. 59:21 Oh, gosh, you guys are on point over. So I'm going to go a little bit different. I've got six, of course. So I think so six is by far that's that's, that's in our top 11 was closed over me. I also had 10 Okay, and 11 so at 610 and 11. Okay, so six and 59:38 11 are definitely in the top two. 59:40 Yeah, absolutely. So with that, Are y'all ready? For the reveal? 59:44 What what what what's the what's the on the third? Do we want it because we want to do the third. So we all had like a 59:51 bullet. I had four. 59:52 And you know what he and you had four, 59:54 four. I had 1010 We're all waiting. Like it's kind of like a three weeks. Split right there. Yeah. So, so we basically had four 610 and 11. Were our favorites. Okay. Okay, that's three. So we'll just take those as the four. Are you ready for the reveal? Yeah, let's do it. Alright. So number one. All right, number one, everybody remembers this. 1:00:17 We all kind of put an X on it. This is the wilderness trail. Ah, bottom, the bond. 1:00:22 I said, and I said, I thought it might be JW dan. So remember that. 1:00:26 There we go. There we go. Number two, we were all right. GEORGE deco. But you know, the thing is, is that like, I really enjoyed it. I, I would, I would honestly put that out there as my top but you know, when we look at stuff that's across the market, people that are going for, I think we look at the Kentucky Bourbons of what people really want. The George decal note like you love it or you hate it. It's one or the other. It's okay. And so, you just got you just got to find it now. Here it is. Number three, Henry McKenna. Number three is Henry McHenry. I had XR 1:00:59 Look what I put I put a line through it. Like it and see. Let me replace it. It happens it happens. 1:01:06 I know I've had some McKenna's oh they're just 1:01:08 this is not this is not smell good. So but then again remember we talked about this so now I like it. No I don't like it single barrel offering now it's hits different cannonballs McKenna phone calls this one time. Number four. New Heaven Hill the new bottle and bond heaven Hill shit. Right. So 1:01:32 so it lands on the top four. Yeah, it 1:01:36 lands on the topic. I think that was number one because we were so I really liked it. 1:01:41 You did you both you both. We both put that as your number one. Yeah. CI There you go. 1:01:48 This was my second guess about it was was an old Bardstown number five. 1:01:53 You are on point. Bardstown old parts town is number five. Right? Yep. 1:02:00 I can't remember. 1:02:01 But listen, here we go this is the one that I'm most proud about because I thought I guess it and I love this brand. I love the proctor making number six is the early times 1:02:10 body. Yeah, that six was really good. 1:02:13 Yeah, it was great. 1:02:14 Yeah, yeah, right. Exactly. So I I still stand by it. I say that is the best one liter of bourbon that you find on the market for 27 1792 1:02:26 think you think that you like somebody just like mind reading over here. I'm just like sending you like notes of Allison happening. The texts of the I really, 1:02:34 I really for him, I really do drink for a living. 1:02:37 So 1792 the bottle and bond. This was a pic that was done by the wine rack here and local and global. So that was that one. Number eight. Might have a guests. 1:02:48 I didn't have a guest on not just a negative. Alright. 1:02:50 Well, this is probably the most common bourbon you're finding the market is the Evan Williams. bottle and bond. Right. So there you go. Number nine is the Jim Beam Yeah, so to access to Exodus, I mean, I, I literally literally wrote down I hate doing this because I love the book no family I it's just like I literally wrote down. I said the worst of all of it and I'm just not a fan of it. That's just that's just how it is. Sorry. Number 10. S

Join Craig Hutchison and Damian Barrett for Ep 39 - The Right NOT To Know. To keep up to date with the show and submit a question like our Facebook Page or follow the podcast on Twitter.  TIME CODES 30 - The Right to Know Campaign. Front pages blacked out yesterday. National security v the right to know has always been an issue. 4.30 – Damo's alternative campaign. The Right NOT to Know. Doesn't want to know so much that is presented as news these days ie when Jimmy Bartel puts his bins out. 6.30 – Hutchy highly recommends reading Catch and Kill by Ronan Farrow (available HERE).   Farrow's investigation of Hollywood Producer Harvey Weinstein is remarkable. 10.30 – Damo's homework on Twitch.   12.45 – Discussion of the expose of the racing industry and animal mistreatment as reported on 7.30 on ABC TV last week The Dark Side of Australia's Horse Racing Industry. Watch it HERE. 22.30 – What's Kyle Sandiland's issue with Crocmedia and Hutchy?  Kyle and Jackie O's huge new pay deal is incredible. 25.30 – New Australian Podcast Ranker – ranks podcast released by major radio networks.  28.30 – Damo got his hands on an AFL Player Standard Contract in regards to potential for future legal action regarding concussion.   31 – Mitch Cleary's performance in Trade Radio. He's now a star – elevated from a rising star. 32.00 – Herald Sun's front cover promo on Sunday. Sealed Section. . .Bedroom Secrets Revealed. Do we still do sealed sections? Are they appropriate or not? 36 – Question of the Week for Social Status from Sean Delaney. 38 – Video didn't kill the radio star. Trade Radio consumption figures prove that people love the video stream but it doesn't cannibalise the radio show. It's a voyeuristic way of consuming Trade. The Sounding Board is produced, engineered and edited by Jane Nield for Crocmedia.

It was your idea so you reap all the benefits. Right? Not always. This podcast examines two situations in which your idea may, in fact, be someone else's intellectual property. If you have any questions or would like to instruct Simon professionally, please email simon@technical-terms.co.uk www.technical-terms.co.uk --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/technical-terms/message

"Peace is the beauty of life. It is sunshine. It is the smile of a child, the love of a mother, the joy of a father, the togetherness of a family. It is the advancement of man, the victory of a just cause, the triumph of truth." - Menachem Begin Ruthie and RA dive deep with "The Right Not to be Offended."  We also ask bigger questions about the things we see and don't see presented to us in Mainstream Media.  We question why the Democratic Debates weren't more publicized.  We question the opinionated moderators.  We question the on going censorship. We question the changing algorithm. We question why our 9/11 video created a few years ago was deleted by You Tube.  We see right thru the media programming.  They thrive off creating tension, fear, dishonesty, shaming, blaming, and anger.  None of these qualities promote trust or common ground.  It doesn't not promote wealth, health, or prosperity.  Is Donald Trump really the one we should be upset with, or should we examine the manipulative programming tactics of the media? Listen here to Ruthie and RA's latest Cafecito Break. Sources: https://www.wakingtimes.com/2019/08/02/the-empire-is-coming-for-tulsi-gabbard/ http://meanttobehappy.com/10-ways-you-too-can-stop-being-so-easily-offended/

Not caring what people think. It's supposed to just happen like that, and come so naturally. Right? Not for me, and I am pretty sure not for all of you. Running my own business has really pushed me to go outside my comfort zone, which I think can be hard, no matter what you are tackling in life. Here's my 2 cents on how I have warmed up, little by little, to caring less about what others think and more about what I am working towards. I hope this is valuable for you. Cheers!

So this is my unapologetic insight on being you without being rude even if you who gives a damn? Right ? Not you so why does it matter ?

IDEAL STORY It’s good to pursue ideals. Right? Not always. When you set goals that are really ideals, you create a blueprint for disappointment and failure. How do you know the difference between an ideal and a real goal? That’s what this ideal story reveals. This episode presents the core ideas of Dan Sullivan’s brilliant book, The Gap and the Gain: Building Your Progress and Happiness on How Your Brain Works for You. Dan is a powerful agent of change whose thinking can dramatically transform your personal and financial life. In today’s podcast you’ll learn: The huge difference between and ideal and a real goal Why pursuing an ideal is like trying to reach the horizon Why looking back is more productive than looking forward How to set and pursue goals that constantly energize you Why you should want a progress vs. results mindset Dan Sullivan created Strategic Coach, a company that has catapulted the success of entrepreneurs for decades. he has a gift for explaining profound truths in very simple ways that you can understand and apply. Your ideal story may not be so ideal. Listen, find out why, switch your thinking to a powerful new mindset, prosper, and grow.

The locals have happened and the results have been less than pleasant for the Conservatives and Labour. But it's ok, we have lots of parliamentary business for them to take their minds off it, right? Right? Not quite. But at least we have a bill about circuses! This is all you need to know about politics this week. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Erik:                                     00:01                    Welcome to mastering Monday, the interview segment. Hi, I'm Erik Bowman, your host and owner of Bowman financial strategies where we provide straight answers so you can make confident decisions to live the retirement you have always dreamed of. This is the second part of a three part interview with Janelle Graham fitness trainer out of Castle Rock, Colorado is 24 hour fitness. If you were to recommend anything to a senior too, be healthier, what are the few things that you think are going to be the most important to achieve? 80% of the optimal results. And that goes towards a little bit of a concept I talk about with my clients, the 80 20 principle that there is a certain number of activities where you can achieve really good results and by doing more activities your marginal return starts to shrink a little bit. So what are the top things, do you think anybody who's a senior citizen should be considering to try to be a little more active and a little safer and healthier? Janelle:                               01:04                    I would say number one is an exercise regimen to routine. Number two would be nutrition. What are they in taking on a daily basis to help get them healthier and stay healthier to live longer. And number three I would think would be a mindset. Our minds are huge benefactor, but they can also be a disadvantage if we are in a good mindset that feeds into how our bodies actually act and react to what we think. Erik:                                     01:38                    Well, let's go ahead and break that down one step further than exercise. What are the top one or two things that you would recommend somebody does for an exercise regimen if they haven't done much for the last couple of decades and now they've got some time on their hands and they want to prepare for retirement? What are the top two things that you would recommend they do Janelle:                               01:57                    From an exercise standpoint? Number one would be getting up and just walking. So we talked a little bit about cardio, so getting out and just walking a few blocks and then gradually increasing that to like a mile or so. (Okay.) And the second one would definitely be a strength training regimen. So actually getting the muscles and the bones stronger. Erik:                                     02:16                    If they're not going to the gym and they don't have a gym membership, what could they do around the house to help develop some strength? Janelle:                               02:24                    You could use anything in your cupboard. So soup cans, chairs, anything from your kitchen table chairs to even your sofa sitting and standing. If you have a staircase, just stepping up and down on the staircase will build leg strength. But then you're also going to have a little bit of a heartbeat increases as well. So there's a lot of things to surround your home inside, but also outside, Erik:                                     02:48                    When it comes to nutrition (Mm-hmm?) What do you think the top one or two things are there? Janelle:                               02:54                    My biggest thing with nutrition is, it's not about what you eat, but how much actually consume. Enjoy what you're eating. But how much of it are you actually in taking on a nutrition basis? Really being aware of, okay, I really want steak and potatoes and Erik:                                     03:12                    chocolate cake, Janelle:                               03:13                    chocolate cake! Some cookies. Absolutely. But learning how to actually give yourself that, okay, I can have this, but watching how much we're actually in taking. So instead of having a full cookie splitting in half, Erik:                                     03:30                    I was going to say instead of having five have two, but instead of one, we'll have the half out there. Might agree with two instead of five. Janelle:                               03:38                    They probably will. Okay. Erik:                                     03:41                    I think hydration is a big thing, especially out here in Colorado because every joint in the body, all of your connective tissue requires that. And I think there's a lot of things on the market that you can buy. But what are your thoughts on just water? Janelle:                               03:54                    That's the second big thing with nutrition. So first we talked about food and consumption, but like you said, the water aspect is huge. That is something that you need to really take into consideration. It's not just the tea and the coffee and maybe the soda that you have, but just pure water that you're in taking on a daily basis and making sure that you're getting enough because that's going to help keep the body moving functionally. How it's supposed to move and give the joints and the muscles that lubrication that they need. Um, your body's like a car. You take your car in to get it checked up and get it fixed up and make sure everything's working well. Change the oil. Yeah, you got to change the oil. Sometimes it needs new brakes or new tires. Do you think about your body as the same thing? Your body is a machine and there's different tuneups and different things that we need to do and water is one of those tune ups (Right.) that just keep things moving fluid, (Right) and keep the body moving fluid like the oil in your car. Erik:                                     04:58                    Many people, they have been focused on raising children, uh, volunteering at school, working full time for decades and now it's time to maybe start thinking about themselves for the first time in a long time. And if exercise is a part of that, one of the questions that I think they should have answered is how do you transition into an exercise regimen so that you can do it safely without injuring yourself and so that you can enjoy it enough that you don't quit Janelle:                               05:28                    With a workout routine or regimen really comes down to what are your goals and what are you personally wanting to achieve? Thinking about, okay, well now I've got all this time on my hands and I'm excited about it. What have I done currently or in the past that could help me further myself forwards and get into what are your interests? You're wanting to go skiing, right? Or take that trip overseas. So first having what we're wanting to do because then that keeps us motivated. We have to have a motivator to get us going sometimes. So if we have a motivator to get us going and then we gradually work into those stepping stones to get you through that. So a similar case would be a gentleman that comes in and works out personally with me. He had retired and been retired for a few years and him and his wife for wanting to go on a vacation and he hadn't been moving, he'd been more sedentary. So how do we get him up and how do we get him moving? And so it's stepping stones, just teaching them how to actually squat properly, sit and stand, and really working on balance, giving different things balance wise because we have to have a lot of balance. And that's one of the biggest things that ends up going as we get a little bit older that's going to help with walking. Erik:                                     06:54                    So part of what you're reviewing or training of the client in, in that particular scenario are specific exercises and routines that focus on balance? Janelle:                               07:06                    Like standing on one foot, Erik:                                     07:07                    okay, Janelle:                               07:08                    Just standing on your right leg and pulling your left leg up, walking heel to toe down a straight line. So very simplistic things. A lot of people are like, oh well I can do that. And then you ask them to do it and they're like, oh my goodness, I thought I had great balance. (Right.) You know, but very simple stuff that you can do every day just in your own home. You don't have to come to the gym to do. So it's kind of almost like your homework (yeah). That you do on your own. And it's, um, simplistic everyday life stuff. But those are the building blocks we have to get into place first to lay a foundation, right? Because once we lay a good foundation, you get going every few weeks and by three to four months down the road, he's squatting without a chair or a box behind him. Janelle:                               07:52                    He's able to stand on one foot. He notices that he can step off of a curb without being worried about catching himself and he's getting in and out of his car easier. Right? Not grunting, no. Right. Or like, Ooh, ow, this hurts or that hurts. Yeah. We've got those few months underneath our belt and now he's got another month or two before he actually leaves for his trip. (Right.) And so now we've built those building blocks. We've laid down stones and a pathway to help him get there. And now we can actually progress a little bit further and get him stronger to go on his trip. Erik:                                     08:31                    Thank you for joining us for the second of three episodes with the interview segment with Janelle Graham fitness trainer from Castle Rock, Colorado's 24 hour fitness. You can leave comments on our Facebook page or on our website at www.bowmanandfinancialstrategies.com                  Disclosure:                         08:56                    Investment advisory services offered by Change Path LLC, change path and Bowman financial strategies are unaffiliated entities.  

In this episode, Leon and Josh discuss failures big and small, and how our religious/moral/ethical traditions inform the "opportunities" for failure that life in IT presents us with almost daily. Transcript: Leon: 00:00 Welcome to our podcast where we talk about the interesting, frustrating and inspiring experiences we have as people with strongly held religious views working in corporate it. We're not here to preach or teach you our religion. We're here to explore ways we make our career as IT professionals mesh, or at least not conflict with our religious life. This is technically religious. Josh: 00:21 Hey Leon, did I ever tell you about the time I was wrong? Josh: 00:24 No Josh: 00:26 It's okay. I was only mistaken. Leon: 00:29 Oh, seriously?!? Josh: 00:32 You know, dad jokes are a fantastic thing, Leon. And uh, sometimes my delivery is great and sometimes it's an epic fail, which is good. It's okay. Because I think today I want to talk about failures in it. Leon: 00:47 Like when the SAN fails? Josh: 00:50 No. How about when we fail the SAN, Not when the SAN fails us. Leon: 00:54 Oh, you mean like the time I took the entire backup path down, but I forgot about it. And later on I did a fail over and the entire storage array went down because there was nothing to backup to. Josh: 01:03 Uh, yeah, exactly that. Leon: 01:05 Oh God. Okay. All right. Once again, our religious, moral, ethical outlook I think helps us with those failures. First of all, I should say that the opportunity to fail presents itself almost every nanosecond in IT. I think there's lots of things to fail at. Um, but uh, as, as some people say, failure isn't an option, it's actually built into the primary features of the product a lot of times. So I think our religious outlook helps us to either adapt to failure or fail better. What do you think? Josh: 01:40 Well, um, so I, you know, I don't have a great answer for that yet. I'm going to flip back to my ideas of, of religion based on scripture. Okay. So, in the scripture, in the New Testament says, "be ye therefore perfect even as your father in heaven is perfect." And to me that's always been a very weighty thing because I view God as perfect. You know, he's all knowing, all loving. He's, he's the perfect father and holy cow, how do I ever live up to that? And I, I've spent a lot of time in my religious life and even my post-Mormon life thinking about this mandate we've been given of being perfect. And you know in IT I'm, I'm nowhere near perfect. I am so far from it, but man, uh, I spent a lot of time in my religious upbringing trying to look, sound, act, be perfect. And I didn't do a very good job to be frank. Leon: 02:50 So it's interesting because, uh, at least in in Judaism, yes, God is perfect, omnipotent, you know, uh, infinite, all of those things. But, but the mandate to be perfect is... That's, that's a hard pill to swallow. Um, the, the language that I've always heard is that you should, you should try to perfect yourself. So it's more a message of constant self improvement. Knowing that, that there's always something about yourself that you can improve upon rather than say that you're trying to attain this goal of perfection. I think that that's, to be very honest, you know, impossible. But I also think that that idea pairs nicely with IT life because in IT, I think that we, the, the people who are most successful in IT typically are committed to being lifelong learners and to knowing that they're going to spend their whole life perfecting a set of skills - whether it's networking skills or their knowledge of IOS commands or, their ability to create good, useful powershell scripts or whatever it is - that nobody sits back on their laurels and says that "I'm the everything about active directory. I've got it all down." I mean, they may be comfortable with it, but there's always a recognition that you could do more with it. Um, so yeah, I think that's an easier thing to, to get to then perfection. Josh: 04:22 Agreed. Agreed. Yeah. And you know, some may argue that you've arrived at a state of perfection when you realize that you have to be constantly learning. And it was that old adage. The more I know, the more I realized how much I don't actually know. And I think that that's very true both in life as well as an it an interesting story to share real quick. I've got younger brothers, and my youngest brother, uh, I usually introduce him to people when I'm, when I'm telling a story like this, I say "my little brother is an overachiever" and they look at me like, "oh, I see." Yeah, he dropped out of high school twice. And people that they kind of give me this odd look like, "are you just being snarky?" And then I go on to tell them about how my youngest brother is the most magnificent carpenter I've ever met. Although he is a high school dropout, twice, because he went back and decided, nope, this definitely is not for me, which is okay, right? He then went on to work for another master carpenter, worked like a dog. Fortunately he lives out here kind of near me. He is head-hunted on the regular by some of the top architects in the region. He builds the most insanely complex things. And he just SEES them. And I think to myself, "wow, he would have totally wasted away sitting in a classroom some place." In fact, I had that exact discussion with my son today who's trying to figure out where he wants to go to. And I asked him, I said, "Noah, would you be happy sitting in a classroom for the next four years?" And he said, "I would be miserable." And it's true. He would be absolutely miserable. And so, you know, this idea that, that perfection requires you to go sit in a classroom, or for my youngest brother to, you know, graduate from High School is, you know, that's, it's null and void in those cases, that is not their idea of perfection, you know. So sometimes when we talk about learning, we look and we say, "hey, you know, um, Leon, you only learned, uh, you know, these skills. And Leon is the perfect it engineer because he knows x, y, and Z." Leon: 06:43 Okay. Getting a little deep here! Josh: 06:46 Hold on, hold on. Okay. But then we look at other people who have a completely different skillset that is very relevant to what they need to accomplish. And for them, they are that perfect engineer, right? It's the whole idea of, you know, hey, I can script in powershell or I could script in python, but if you are an AIX admin, perl's gonna help you, but you probably need to have some other skills, and that powershell isn't going to be very useful for you. Cause I don't think AIX runs powershell. Leon: 07:18 Right? Not, not presently, but you never know in the future, or powershell may run in AIX anyway. Um, we can dream can't we? So, um, yeah, I think, I think what are the things you're getting at is, is that self improvement and perfecting ourself is actually a process of repeated failure. Josh: 07:42 Amen Leon: 07:42 As, as hard as it is to sometimes accept that on a daily basis. It's hard to live that experience. I often, Josh: 07:53 You only fail once a day? Leon: 07:54 No, no. A constant state of failure. I like to tell people that, that working in IT sometimes feels like a huge stretches of soul crushing depression, punctuated by brief moments of insane euphoria, before returning back to the long stretch of soul crushing depression again. You know, like, I'm working on this problem. "I don't know what it is. I can't figure it out. I've tried everything. Let me try this one. Yeah. OH MY GOSH IT WORKS THIS IS BRILLIANT!! This is incredible. I love it... Okay, next problem." All right. Josh: 08:31 That's accurate, isn't it? I, I, that's my life. I don't know how I didn't know any different. Leon: 08:37 So the, so the idea of failure, really is just, I think framing an experience incorrectly because it's just, you know, working, you know? It's finding out all the things that don't work. And I think that our religious, moral, ethical outlook, those of us who, who feel strongly about those, I think that it allows us to embrace that experience, to be more flexible about failure. Then somebody who, who may not have that outlook. Not that people who, you know, don't, you know, who aren't religious CAN'T do that obviously. But I think that that a religious framework helps us to see it in a particular light. Um... Josh: 09:26 Why do you think that is? What, what is it about having a view of yourself, not as isolated from the world, but having, uh, an understanding that you are relative to, you know - whether it's God, whether it's, you know, the universe, whether, you know, whether it's the... what is it about that view that allows us to embrace both failure and an evolution toward perfection? Leon: 09:54 I think part of it is that in, in many religions, there is actually a habituation of repentance. And what I mean by that is that there is a period of time or a day or even a moment during daily prayers when you ask for forgiveness. When you recognize that you've somehow fallen short of a goal that you could have reached but didn't, and you apologize for that. Now at least in the Jewish tradition that is, you know, failures, things that you have missed between you and God. So, you know, "I'm expected to do certain things and I fell short and I'm so sorry and I'm going to work on that..." And so on and so forth. That's sort of the subtext of the prayer. But I think that asking for forgivenes, apologizing is a habit, is a technique, and you have to practice it before it feels natural. And I also think that knowing that you can apologize and be forgiven is something that you have to practice a few times before you can become comfortable with it. And because religions tend to have that built in - that repentance, apology, forgiveness cycle - that we and IT who make mistakes that do affect other people are perhaps finding an easier time saying, like, I joked earlier in this talk, you know, "I took the backup circuit down, I forgot to bring it back up again. I did a fail over a week later. I am so sorry. I know that caused an outage. I will, you know, here are the things I'm going to do to make sure that doesn't happen again." I'm not, quote-unquote "a failure" for having allowed that to happen. I failed, I made a mistake. But my, my Jewish experience with the repentance cycle allows me to admit that without feeling like I have to give up some part of my soul in order to do so. I, you know, I apologize all the time. I apologize, honestly, every day during prayers, There's a particular times of year when apology figures prominently. And the act of showing up and doing that allows me to turn to my coworkers and apologize and know that forgiveness can be given without fear. And I think, and I think that's it. I think that fear really gets in the way of a lot of people, you know, in that case, I don't know what you think about that. Josh: 12:37 Yeah. You know what, I 100% agree. I, I saw, I can't tell you how many times in my life I've been afraid. Um, funny story growing up, we lived in a small house that had one of those dirt basements. You know the kind I'm talking about. And I was horrified of that basement. Absolutely horrified. And so when you turn the lights on in the main basement, there was a back basement that was like completely, uh, didn't have any lights. And every so often my parents would say, "hey, can you go down to the cellar and get something?" And I would just start panicking Leon: 13:17 That is nightmare fuel! Josh: 13:19 Right? It is totally nightmare fuel. And I can remember like just screaming up the stairs as fast as I could because I was so afraid of the thing I could not see. So yeah, I am not Kevin McCallister. I cannot stand with, you know, a triumph in front of my furnace, in my basement and you know, you know, you know, scream from my front step, you know, "I am not afraid anymore." I also don't have a next door neighbor who I think is an ax murderer. Um, that's another thing too. Leon: 13:51 That's a plus. Josh: 13:51 That's definitely a plus. Every tell you about my first, my very first fail? Actually, did I ever tell you about how I got started in IT? That's probably better. Leon: 14:00 Tell everyone. Josh: 14:01 Okay. So let me tell you and everyone who's listening. Um, thanks mom. Uh, I want it to be a lawyer. I remember the exact moment in my life when I decided I want it to be a lawyer. I was in seventh grade and we were doing a mock trial in seventh grade and the smartest girl in class, um, and I were head to head and I eviscerated her. It was hands down the... the entire class was the jury. And it was, it was, it was epic, "Of epic proportions." Wonderful. That moment I realized I actually want to be a lawyer. Yeah, no, no. I'm not a lawyer. Leon: 14:44 As a parent, I can tell you every child is a lawyer. Josh: 14:47 That it, that is very true. That is very true. That's all that. And so I battled for a very long time about whether or not I should embrace this whole idea of being in IT. I also remember the exact moment that my wife and I decided that I should pursue a career in IT. Um, it was mostly out of desperation. I was young, I was married, I had a family and needed to, um, you know, make money. Here I am 20 odd years in and I realized that I did not fail by not becoming a lawyer. In fact, I succeeded by recognizing that being a lawyer was not the path I should walk. Leon: 15:21 Right. So, you know, when I was little, I wanted he marine biologist. Josh: 15:27 You and George Constanza. By that way, Leon: 15:28 I really, you know, Jacques Cousteau, like the whole thing I really wanted... So naturally I went into university to study theater. That makes perfect sense. Then I discovered the universe did not need another short Jewish nebbishy looking actor. Uh, and so of course I went into IT. I mean, that's true. Yeah, it was. Yeah. And now I'll do the same thing. "You know, I was young, I did it for the money." Um, so yeah, it's, you know, there, there's several inventors who said that, "I might have failed a thousand times, but you know, that taught me a thousand things that didn't work." Josh: 16:06 Absolutely. Also also known as a week in the life of Josh. Leon: 16:10 Right, right. That's, you know, and, and I, again, I think that IT really is... So we're talking about two different things though: When you try something and it doesn't work, that's a personal, that's, that's a failure on a very personal level. I tried this, I tried that, and I tried that. And I think that most of us who work in IT are used to that. You know, you've got to try a few things before it's going to work. But then there's the other failures, like the one we joked about at the top of the episode where I took the backup circuit down or I accidentally shut off the VAX because I thought it was a mini fridge. Um, I did that. Josh: 16:43 I do want to know that story someday. Leon: 16:45 Yeah. You know, or whatever. Those are failures that impact other people. Those are the ones that go back to that repentance, apology, forgiveness cycle where you have to go outside of yourself and say "I did fail. I did fall short of the mark and I need to do better." And I think that both of those experiences, those personal ones of trying things and it not working, and the big ones where you have to go in front of other people and apologize and ask for forgiveness. I think both of those things our religious lives prepare us for, because they, it inculcates in us the fact that this is part of life, this is part of the normal experience. And therefore I think our frustration level with that as a normal part of our day is lessened. Because we don't feel like "This is incredible. How do people live like this, with things breaking all the time, and things not working?!? I can't stand it!" Like, no, that's, this is life. This is the way it works. Josh: 17:49 I often said, and I still say, and one of my maybe crowning moments was when someone quoted me saying, this is, "it doesn't matter how close or how far along number..." Sorry, let me say my famous quote one more time. "It does not matter how far along the road to perfection you are when you die. It only matters the direction you're facing." And I think that that's a very important principle. Whether you're talking about your life and your pursuit of this ideal of perfection, or you're talking about your career, we're all going to fail. But when you fail, fail forward, and we've heard that from business leaders, "Hey, if you're going to fail, fail forward, don't feel backwards." But that is, if we embrace that, we recognize that, you know, some people may fail faster and get up and move forward, but every single one of us needs to, when we fail, fail in the direction of progress. And when we do that, we, when we look up, we still realize that we're on the path. It's when we fail and we fail completely off, or, you know, maybe there's no trust and support in our lives or in our business. You know, there, there are cases where I failed and I became the immediate butt of blame. Uh, you know, people, yeah, "Josh screwed up," and that those are really hard to recover from. One of my managers, well actually our common manager for a very brief period of time... Um, yeah, it's a story for another day, right? Leon: 19:23 Apology, forgiveness. We're back in that cycle again. Josh: 19:27 So Andy said, "Nobody will be faulted for trying and failing, only for failing to try." Leon: 19:35 I liked it every time he said it. Just going back to what you said about your famous quote, your, you're remarkably close to a beloved ancient rabbi, Rabbi Tarfon, who, in Pirkei Avot, said, "It's not your responsibility to finish the work of perfecting the world, but you're not free to desist from it either." Josh: 19:55 Oh, I liked that one. Leon: 19:56 Yeah. So you, you are standing on solid ground with your famous quote. So just to wrap up the episode, I think something that Andy and I both saw and you were just a little bit short before you got there to see it, was that idea of "you won't be blamed for failing" is, it also depends so much on what you do about the failure. When I was back at where you're working, where I used to work, I saw something within a period of a week: two major outages that were caused by somebody making a change outside of change control. In the first case the person immediately called folks and said, "hey, the system down. I really didn't think that what I was changing was going to have this kind of impact. I thought it was a minor configuration file. I didn't know it had this sort of wide ranging impact. What can I do to fix it?" And they were told "there's nothing you can do to fix it. It's beyond your skill set." But that person stayed on the phone for hours while the repairs, the backups and restores and everything went, you know, and said, "I just want to be here to see what I need to know for next time." And nothing more was said about it. And if I hadn't known this person, I probably wouldn't have known that much of it. A week later there was another major outage. Not with the same system, a similar system, similar magnitude. This person tried to cover their tracks. They actually tried to bury it under the rug. "What, what? It's down? I had no idea!" And as we all know, there's log files for everything. And so it came out pretty quickly that, you know, what had happened. This person had made a change without a change control. Nobody knew it was happening. This person tried to bury it under the rug and, without another comment, that person was simply escorted to the door. That was it, it was over. It wasn't about the failure, it was about how they handled it. It was about how they owned or didn't own up to it. And I think that's when we think about failure in IT. And also what does a religion, religious, moral, ethical outlook give us? I think it's, it's that it gives us the ability to recognize that failure is a normal, natural part of our experience as people moving around the world. And that, you know, it's not some sort of huge character flaw to have failed and, and how to have the moral fortitude to own up to it and to say, you know, uh, to apologize and to say, what can I do to make restitution and to make sure that it doesn't happen again. I think that's really more than anything else. What, what our outlook, our religious outlook on life gives us. Josh 1: 22:56 Yeah. And that's really interesting. I love the the Pixar movies. My family loves to Pixar movies. My son, my oldest son, really loves the Pixar movies. And in Toy Story, Buzz attempts to fly, you remember the scene right? And so to paraphrase Buzz, "When you fail, fail with style." And of course, that's what Buzz says. He thinks he's flying and it takes him the entire story. And then, you know, uh, what he's looking up and he's like, "Oh my goodness, you know, Buzz, you're flying". And the Buzz acknowledges, "No, you know, we're, this is falling with style." And I think that, right? I think that's really the essence of it, right? If you're going to fail, fail with style, fail with purpose and intent, recognize that as you move forward, that's, that is the essence of life. That is the essence of life in IT, life at home, life as an individual, life with your relationship with God. You're going to make mistakes, as you've so wonderfully said, you're going to make mistakes. When you make those mistakes, recognize them, admit to them, and try really hard not to make them again. That that is the evolution of humanity. Roddie: 24:15 Thank you for making time for us this week to hear more of technically religious. Visit our website at technicallyreligious.com where you can find our other episodes, leave us ideas for future discussions or connect with us on social media. Leon: 24:28 So as we learned from Alfred and Christopher Nolan's "Batman begins." Alfred: 24:31 Why do we fall, sir? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.  

Hi everyone! This is Connie Sokol, and you're listening to Balance Redefined Radio. I've spent over 20 years teaching people how to redefine what balance really is, meaning a more purposeful and joyful life.   They’ve paid off credit cards, lost weight, organize their homes, and created a meaningful life plan and they've managed their time, changed habits and experience greater success both at work and at home.   So now I decided to take the plunge and help about 100,000 new people who want to redefine balance in their lives. People ask me all the time, “How do I go from an overwhelming and chaotic life to more purpose and organization and joy?”   That's the reason why I'm doing this podcast, to give you trusted answers and create a space where you could find balance. My name is Connie Sokol and welcome to Balance Redefined Radio…   So happy you're spending more time together with me on these wonderful life principles and practices. We want to help you get your life balance redefined and that's the goal.   So it's a day I'm sharing a little bit more about saying, “No.”   Ever been there ever wanted to say no, but it just couldn't get past your lips because you were so afraid of offending or embarrassing yourself or disappointing someone or something like that.   And so you just hold it inside, but you're still wanting to say that word…   And so what's the best festering and you know, you got to take care of it and you're avoiding and maybe your second down snickers or you're binge watching Netflix, who knows, but you just gotta say, “Nope, Nope,”...   I'm going to help you with that today. All right, so grab a pen and paper or just drive and keep it in your mind as we're talking...   So the first thing to successfully saying no is to have clear in your mind the actual goal or objective that you want. You got to get back to that space of clarity…   Sometimes we want to say no simply because we're just so maxed out and so the first person that comes to us at that maxed out point is going to be the one that gets all the firing shots. No, no, no, no, no. Right? Not gonna happen. That happens to me with my kids…   I know after like 9:00 at night, it's just a “no,” it doesn't matter what it is, just no because I am done. Okay, done...   So consider, what is your ultimate goal or objective? Where is that going to take you? Is it going to get you ahead? Is it going to get you where you want in your ideal life vision?   You know, I talk about praying that life plan and that life vision paragraph is that gonna get you fulfilling that. So that's what you gotta ask yourself because sometimes an initial, oh, I want to say no, it can be a yes…   When we get back to what is important. Now on the flip side, it may just be a note, is it really going to help you get that promotion? Is it really going to help you spend that quality time with your children?   Is it really going to help you lose that 20 pounds? Maybe this extra thing is really a no, so you've got to discern that for yourself.   Will it help me reach my ultimate objectives and remember when I'm talking about objectives, that is that there are connected mind, body, soul, so it's not just on paper, does this look good? It's really that whole soul living.   Is this going to ultimately get me to that place or move me forward in that direction? So consider that I'm gonna.   Share with you a great example that I love of this being clear about what it is you really want in me from your life and what, how it will actually benefit you in that whole soul kind of living. It's from the book. My answer is “No, if that's okay with you.”   I love that it's a Net Gartrell and I think for women especially, we can totally relate to that.   “No, no,” The hard stop, “is that okay. That's what we do. Instead of just owning it and being our bold self, right. Not our bulldozer herself, but our bold self…   So in this book she shares an experience that is shared by Peggy Noonan, who was a presidential speech writer and Wall Street Journal editor, and so peggy was asked by a reputable, very powerful woman to help run her congressional campaign and she's talking to her and he's like, well, I don't know.   And then this powerful woman says, yes, but with your help I can totally win. And Peggy shares for appreciation, but since you know what, I'm a single mother of a little boy and the powerful woman says, well, bring them along.   And Peggy Noonan says, well, that wouldn't be helpful for my son and the power of a woman replies, it's US Congress. I need you. Have you been in that spot?   Someone's giving you that portal but I need you and you can do this and it's so perfect for you and I need what you have and your skill set and you'd be perfect and it'll be just great. So at this point had union rates.   Suddenly I realized she doesn't care about my son. My son is not her agenda. Winning is her agenda, that my agenda is my son. Her agenda is crucial to her. My agenda is crucial to me.   They are not the same agenda. I told her I just couldn't do it and I know I not only disappointed her, but she went from a person who admired me to a person who thought I didn't get the big picture. It took me awhile to realize that doesn't matter.   I have my own big picture. Does that make sense? Great Opportunity...   Great possibilities could go super far, but the reality is there was a hidden opportunity cost, that's what I call it, and there always is one and you've got to know from the beginning just how much you can go on that because once you get in, you're in and there's a cost to get out.   So what is the hidden opportunity cost for pursuing this and that you can find that out...   That comes clear when you go back to your life vision, to your life plan, when you really know what it is you want and you knew it was genius and knowing what she needed and what her son needed because of her son is set and happy and good, she's going to be set and happy and good.   When they're little like that, you got to take care of business and that's a beautiful example of being able to say no and not worrying about you know the fallout and what happens from there.   If you have stayed with your integrity, stayed aligned with your life plan, stay aligned with what your values are, then you can go to bed at night and be happy. It doesn't matter what's said on social media. It doesn't matter what people say around the water cooler.   It doesn't matter because if it's not you, it's someone else. If they're not talking about you today, there'll be talking about you in two weeks...   What matters is that you've made decisions that matter. It makes sense to you and the way that you can live a life of alignment in your integrity, your values, and in what you know matters most to you, so that's the first thing is know if it's going to align with your goals and objectives.   The second thing is to know your specific roles and responsibilities. Sometimes we're going to say, knee jerk, “No,” because it just sounds so overwhelming and then we'll get into distance so bad. It was just these three things I was supposed to do. The flip side can be true.   Also, when we look at some of these sounds like a great idea. Sounds so fabulous, but we get this early in our soul. We think, oh, I wonder if I should say no. That's when you find out more information. Ask questions. Asks specifically, what is my role?   What are my responsibilities, and how do you see me fulfilling those so that you can get a clear idea...   Now, the beauty of this, it's kind of a twofer because if you're wanting to say, “no,” this is how you can help them get to know if you say, what is my role and what are my responsibilities, and they start lifting off list, listing off one, two, three, four, 10, 20, 25, 30, and they start saying all the things that are going to be required.   It makes it so much easier to be on that same page to say, you know what? This is what I'm hearing from you and I can see I'm not a fit for this, but you know who's a good fit for this? Then refer someone else.   That's a great way to do that, so consider as you're going through, listen to those roles and responsibilities, and then as you get that person on the same page, you can clearly show them why you are not a fit for that. Now, if they're adept at being able to blast through objections, then you're going to have to have some on your side.   One of the best things to come back to is it doesn't sit right and myself. This just isn't a good time for me. This doesn't sit right for me right now. I can see where that would work, but right now it doesn't work for me.   Those are great phrases to say because you really can't say anything more after that. When someone says it's just not sitting right, doesn't feel right. This isn't the right time for me.   There really isn't too many other places you can go before you start becoming really annoying on the other side, so consider doing that. As far as being able to say no, find out more about the roles and responsibilities for yourself to further clarify and then also to help them get on the same page and start entering into that.   Bear starting to get this whole concept of actually I don't think you are a fit either and they'll be able to sort of get that buy in on the soft side, so that's a really good way to go about that.   The last thing to do and saying no is we usually get stuck in the feeling of frustration and resentment and then we start blaming or denying or pointing fingers and that's not a professional or a healthy place to be, whether it's with colleagues or with your family or with loved ones so that your family has loved ones, but you know what I meant ends on the day anyway.   So consider, you know, asking yourself a couple of questions when you know it is your role and responsibility. Got It, but that's over. You know, you're over that piece, but you're just wanting to say no from this new opportunity or new role or new responsibility or this new aspect for it.   Then be able to and say, is this something delegate? So the first question you want to ask is, is it mine? This is a great way to say, no. Is it mine? Oh, you know what would love to do that, but that's not my role or responsibility that's actually so-and-sos in this department.   Let me connect you with them...   That is a great way to go about that. Hey, how can I connect you with them? Let me connect you with so and so. Let me introduce you. So ask yourself, is it mine and if it isn't, who's is it?   And pass that baton. That's the third one passed the baton. How do I best pass the baton and do I do it by saying, you know, I'm aware that So-and-so was over this.   Like I said, “How can I introduce you?” or do you say, you know, “What I can get you started?” and then these are the pieces that these other people do or even with your family saying, “Oh, who is this? mine?”   “This is not mine. This is your older brothers,” and then you go to the older brother say,” oh lovely, I love you and this is your piece to do,” and then you follow it up with how can I best pass this baton because maybe that child is giving you that deer in the headlights look, which I get often have.   Even though they've done this for five years, they act like it's all news to them and say something like, “can I help you get started with cleaning out the garage and I help you get started with mowing the lawn?”   “Is there anything that you need to get going?...”   So it starts their brain in a sense have already sort of accepting that this is their responsibility now instead of fighting it, you've kind of broken through and said, yeah, how can I get you started? They got a little helper kind of on the way here so they can get moving and it's kind of that soft side of you're doing it.   It's just years and now you're just offering to help in any way that you can at the start now, be aware of the vortex, the suction vortex of I have now taken over your job while I'm trying to model it.   My kids would do this to me all the time until I finally got wise. Many, many years later that they would say, now how do you do that, mom? How do you clean that sink? And then I would show them and of course the St Louis, so do not buy into that sucked in vortex.   Don't get sucked in to do their job. So you say, “How can I help you start? Oh, you know what, you need to put gas in first and then show them there's the gas can go get it and you can put the gas in. Do not walk over and get the gas camp.”   I found with my boys, especially love them. Organization was not their favorite thing, nor was a clean smelling room. But I digress. So the garage, you know, I teach this stuff, I teach organizational principles.   So finally I got so tired of this, I said we're going to do this differently. So I said, “This morning, the garage needs to be cleaned out. I'm going to teach you a very three step system that will make this so easy.” So I went down the formula that I teach V-E-R-S, and I went down through each of those three steps right down to the angel need labels and a marker.   “When you're done, you're going to put this stuff up on the shelves in those areas with those labels and it will be swell and good luck. Any questions?” No questions. I said, “Great, I'll be back.”   I removed myself from the situation and went and did errands and then came back telling them my full expectation is the garage would be organized in those three steps by the time that I returned and it was amazing. I came back, they had done their sort.   They had done the putting it on the right shelves and they still just had to put on a few labels, but they had done a solid job and I was thrilled and also a little bit sad because I thought, “how long have you known how to do that? And I had been doing it for you.” Right?   That's the end of those days, so hopefully that makes a little bit of sense that you just want to pass the baton, get them started and then they're on their merry way and if not they come back with questions.   Well, yeah, farm them out. You pass that baton to someone else who can better answer that question, right? That's exactly what you do.   So hopefully today you've got a few quick tips on saying no, you understood that you got to figure out your own goals and objectives so that you're clear about that when you do really need to say no, and then what are the roles and responsibilities that are required and is this an add on and what does it look like for that?   And then third, are you the one for the job? Does this need to be delegated? Is this mine?   If not, who's is it? And then how can I best pass that baton a right try one of those today and #gotorganized. #said no. #teamlive #teamreplay. #ConnieSokolgivesgreatawesomeadvice. Yeah, something like that… :)   That would be super. Whatever you do, post something below and let me know what resonated most with you. Would Love, love, love to know that. Then I know if this is a value to you and also if you put it into practice, I should say, when choose one to put into practice, when you do post below, let people know.   Let us celebrate your success and let us know what worked...   Even if it didn't, you're like, “Well, this totally stumped, but guess what? I tweaked it and this totally worked for me.” Love it. Totally. Bring it on. Love to hear these things.   Hey, you can always #balancedredefined because that's what we're doing, so hopefully you got some great stuff today. I want to hear about it. Tell me all about your success and even the things that are not seeming so successful. Post them below and stay tuned for more awesome stuff on how to live your life balance redefined. You got it. Thanks for listening and remember to rate and subscribe. And if you are feeling the need for real balance in your life, get your free five step life plan, and get started today! Just go to conniesokol.com/download.

▸ Free 11 Questions to Change Your Life http://refusingtosettle.com ▸ 30-Day Coaching | https://my30DayCoaching.com So you want to be successful — you’ve seen uber successful people and see yourself there, right? Athletes, business people, millionaires, actors, musicians — but how do you know if you’ll actually get there one day? This is Clark with refusing to settle dot come — let’s go 1. You risk it for the biscuit “no risk no reward” we understand this conceptually, but we really don’t apply it daily. Work much harder not to lose something than to gain something. Right? The reason it’s so scary to ask a women out on a date is because we view the LOSS of image getting rejected. The reason it’s so hard to to film youtube videos is that you’re viewing all potential haters. Negative comments! Tip: FLIP THAT! View it going RIGHT Not talking stupid risk here, but anything you do (acting, business, etc) is gonna require putting yourself out there - which ultimately means RISK 2. you can take failure Story: Goal in college was reading 4-hour work week! SOLD! Absolute Abs product in college. I had great business idea — fitness WITH drums. Shirtless drumming youtube WITH my first product… Absolute Abs. It sold 3 copies. I got TONS of hate. I “wasted” 6-mo of everyday pulling hair out outsourcing to Bangladesh - goal was just to make it BIG TIME. It turned into a big time failure. 3. you can REDIRECT Okay so why wasn’t absolute abs a total failure? because I used this third thing: REDIRECT! This is SO powerful if you get this concept. 2 degree change I 2 degrés changed into self-development. Instagram: 2 degree changed from address book into number one platform in world. You need to re direct your life from time to time, and that’s totally okay! You’ll make it big if you face this with brutal honesty. 4. you can LAUgh Face this “self-development” with such seriousness Ever see Dahlia Lama? Dude is always smiling, occasionally cracks inappropriate jokes! He’s playful. I know telling you to “loosen up” when you’re broke and grinding it out sucks to hear. Did for me. BUT Tony Robbins says: in 5-years you’ll look back on this and laugh, so why wait? Refusing to settle, Clark

The Temple has always been where God chose to presence Himself. Right? Not quite... and now that Jesus has 'rebuilt' the Temple and made us his dwelling place, there's a lot to be learned about the biblical patterns and types in Temple history. Gary introduces the new series.

Boom, what's up guys, this is Steve Larsen.   Today we are gonna talk about recycling stories.   I've spent the last four years learning from the most brilliant marketers today, and now I've left my nine to five to take the plunge and build my million dollar business.   The real question is, how will I do it without VC funding or debt, completely from scratch? This podcast is here to give you the answer.   Join me and follow along as I learn, apply, and share marketing strategies to grow my online business. Using only today's best internet sales funnels.   My name is Steve Larsen, and welcome to Sales Funnel Radio.   What's up guys?   Hey guys, thanks so much for tuning into to Sales Funnel Radio.  I was on stage a little while ago, and I was teaching, and there was one question that comes up every single time when I'm teaching script building, when I'm teaching any kind of story-telling, anything like that.   One of the things that always comes across is, "Stephen I don't know what stories to tell that will break someone's belief patterns and make them want to cause a purchase to happen?".   And I say, "Okay cool cool cool, that makes total sense everyone goes through that first of all. So if you're feeling that, don't worry about that."   Second of all though, what you gotta understand is you don't always need to come up with new stories, right?   So this episode is called Recycling Stories because what I want to do is share with you guys how I do that. So what better way to actually teach you to do that than show you actually me doing that. Does that make sense?   So what I did is, a little while ago I actually decided, this is something I've never done before in front of a live group. I've done a lot of funnel building but live script building!   Guys script writing is hard. Just know that it's one of the hardest parts of funnel building overall.   Putting the pages together, that's some easy stuff man. That's easy stuff. You drag and drop, you're done. Script writing though, that's not easy. And so what I wanted to is...   I thought how cool would it be if I actually went and built a script live in front of an audience, and it made me a little bit nervous - I'm not gonna lie -because it's not an easy thing to do.   We'll spend days coming up with one headline, you know what I mean? And so to write a whole script, not just the headline? That was really challenging for me to do that. It was a lot of fun though.   It took me 12 hours. It was in front of an audience of about 75 people, and I built an entire webinar script from top to bottom. The whole thing, top to bottom. And what I was trying to teach them and share with them in this part, I just ripped it out, and I'm gonna share with you guys here.   I'm building the actual webinar slides live. I recorded my screen doing so and walking through and talking through each slide. So that's actually what we're gonna cut over to in here in just a moment.   But what I want you to understand, see and notice is that for a lot of what I'm doing for that webinar - this is for my product - it's called My Funnel Stash...   "Oh crap, wait just a second. Eh, there we go!" (Stephen goes to get something - he comes back with a fake mustache and some red and green sunglasses - He puts them on and continues to talk).   ...I'm doing it for a product called "My Funnel Stash." It's a play on words. It's all the funnels that I've been building, and that I built over at ClickFunnels.   It's gonna sound a little conceited, kay? But no one really else is gonna have the opportunity to sit next to someone brilliant like Russell Brunson and learn right at the feet of a master for that amount of time.   When I left, one of the things that Clickfunnels did which is brilliant, is Russell was like, well I don't always wanna be just the one funnel builder, so they created an internal agency.   I don't know that ever anyone else ever is gonna have the opportunity to do the kind of thing I did. For that reason I feel a little bit of a mantel to share with you guys some of the things that I was doing over there.   Please note, that's one of the reason why I talk so much about Russell Brunson is because I feel a little bit of a responsibility to share with you some of the things that made funnel building successful. And why someone like me, I was building funnels ahead of that time, but the finer points of it that made it actually work and stick.   This is super cheesy I know, but I actually sent out Clickfunnels colored glasses and a funnel stache, stash with the actual stash of funnels that I used to build 500 funnels next to the guy.   What was interesting about this, after doing the amount of funnel builds that I did at Clickfunnels, I need you to know and hear me now: "Funnel building success has very little to do with the pages, okay?"   You can have a funnel that is limping along on one leg and be totally fine, very successful. Completely fine.   Now please go in and make your funnel tweaks, make them good, but if your funnel is only working because of little tiny tips and tricks inside the funnel, then your offer sucks. Right? Your script is terrible. That's just the fact. Take it from a guy who's made a lot of them. Understand what I'm saying here.   So what I need you to get, this is a longer episode, but I'm trying to share with you guys how I'm recycling my origin story in different products, and how that's totally okay to do.   Scriptwriting, that's really where the rubber meets the road. Before Clickfunnels existed, that was the always the most expensive part of building a funnel with a traditional team - because copy is what does the selling.   I can feel my stache starting to fall over here. I'm getting animated, it's like sweating. Anyway, so guys this a little bit of a longer episode, but we're gonna cut over to a segment that I've chopped out where you're gonna see me recycle the same story for different things, and that's totally fine.   My origin story is still my origin story. So if I'm gonna go sell a product over here, or sell product over there, or sell product over there - those are different products, but I still have the same origin story. I can't change my background.   So how do I recycle my story in a way that fits the other things that I'm selling without making it obvious? And so that's what I'm doing. I'm actually script building. I'm live script building, and I'm taking from a lot of other webinars that I've built to go in and rip out different things and elements to fill out the requirements to make a good origin story.   So again, what is that?   Let's wait again, one more moment. (Stephen goes to grab something)   Okay, a lot of chopping in this one. Sorry. I went and grabbed my copy of Expert Secrets. Anyway this one script inside of your origin story is incredibly powerful. And I know this is gonna be a long episode, but just bear with me.   If you guys a listening on iTunes, if you're listening on the podcast, that's awesome, just know that I'm gonna cut over, and you can still listen, but I'm gonna cut over and literally share my screen as I build out the intro section to my webinar script.   This script did 30 grand in the first week with no ads spend and just a few mentions. Isn't that awesome? That's crazy cool. How did I do that? A lot of it has to do with the script. A lot of it has to do with the way that I pre-framed it and how I built the pressure ahead of time.   You guys are like, "Stephen I can't you serious with this thing on." And honestly, I can't either! I'm trying not to look at the screen over here because I look like a freakin' goofball.   Anyway, check this out. Check this out.   The epiphany bridge script, you guys are gonna watch me us the epiphany bridge script in the wall I tell my origin story.   This is what sets the pace, this is what sets the foundation in the buyers minds so that when you tell the three stories, of secret one, two, three, they're actually in a state to receive them. And this is why it's so important, so powerful. Don't jack up your origin story.   So what I thought, how cool would it be if I rip out and just share with you guys. So it's gonna be like 20, it's like 30 minutes, okay? It's like 30 minutes, but you're gonna hear me explain each slide.   You're gonna watch me explain each one of the steps going through the actual epiphany bridge.   (Steve points to his fake "stache") This thing is actually falling off, but I want you to see how important this is. This is funnel building. The other stuff, I'm not saying...   I'm a funnel builder, I build funnels like crazy. I built two more of them yesterday - which is awesome. They're single page ones, but they're really intense, oh my gosh, they were hard.   But anyway I want you to know at the core of it, if you can't do the thing I'm about to share with you guys, man, choose a funnel style that requires very little copy and/or just learn how to do this.   I didn't know how to do this. I got like straight D's in English. Seriously in pretty much all of high school and a lot of college. I'm not an amazing writer. I'm not. I don't know amazing punctuation. I'm not good at that crap, okay? But I wanna teach you marketing writing. I wanna teach you marketing English, or whatever nationality you're from. There's marketing language.   I'm gonna teach you the language of marketing. It's its own language. It's its own vernacular. It's its own way to present. It's its own way to come across and actually give your people what they should hear in order to cause a buying decision to happen. That's the core.   That is why I can leave an amazing job at ClickFunnels (which did cut me to the soul.It cut me right down to the very core to do that), but it's the reason why three days after I left I had a converting funnel up which made 36 grand without any ads spent. It's because of what I'm gonna share with you in this clip.   So I know this is gonna be a long episode, just get over it. Get a piece of paper and see what I'm doing here.   For those of you guys who are on iTunes, I never normally ask you to do this but come over to the YouTube channel and watch me as I literally record my screen in front of a live audience, fielding their question. Watch me go in and actually build out the introduction section of my webinar   it's what I use no matter what product I am selling. Yes, even for a book.   One of my best funnels right now is this amazing high ticket funnel. Guess what script I freaking used to sell the high ticket thing? The webinar script, guys. I use it everywhere. It's not just for freaking webinars. It's not for something that's only a thousand dollars. I use it for everything.   So please understand that's where my passion comes from. When people read this a lot of times, they're like, "Oh this is about a webinar script" No, no no no! This is the most powerful sales script you've ever seen in your entire life.   I did two summers door-to-door sales, I was a telemarketer, I was good at both of them. This is the most powerful script I've ever seen in my entire life and I don't want you to jack up the intro of it. So again we're gonna cut over here - watch my screen as I do this, bear with me, I know it's a little long. It's not normally this long for these kinds of episodes, but I think you're really getting a lot of value from this, and if you do, please, please, I am begging you, share this.   I'm sick and tired of so much garbage information out there that misleads people. "Oh you're not converting because you don't have the right slogan, the right mission statement," that's bull crap, okay?   You don't know how to sell. That's the issue. And I wanna teach you how to sell. And you're gonna see how I do it inside this episode.   Guys, thanks so much. I know I'm fiery, but this is how I feel about it. This literally saved my family financially to learn how to do this.   And if you wanna do the same, if you're in that same kind of spot...   My stache is falling off.   Learn how to do what I'm gonna share with you. And if you like it, turn around, please share with other people and spread this around. I'd really appreciate that. It convinces iTunes that I'm actually worth my salt. It convinces iTunes that, "Hey, we should actually rank and push up even more." I appreciate you guys.   This is like a thousand downloads an episode now, and I really appreciate you guys checking this out. It really means the world to me to be honest. But man, we're just starting, okay?   And I'm so sick of how much noise is out there, and "little motivated papa Larsen's" coming out right now. Just know that.   But anyways, let's cut on over, you guys watch me actually go and record my screen and share with you guys how I do this. I care about you guys too much to not share this and get a little passionate over it.   Go over, grab a piece of paper, press pause for a sec if you need to. Please share this if you guys enjoy this. I've never shared this part before, and I've never live built what you're about to see in front of an audience ever. I always do it on my own.   Thanks so much and let's cut over now, bye.   I wanna answer the question. Now we dove into pretty deep in the last time I went through and I built this stuff.   I know some of you guys, this is the first time you've been in here, but some of the stuff I'm talking about I've already gone through, so I'm gonna move on....   There's two introductions. I have effectively introduced the webinar. There's two introductions in the introduction section. There's two sections of it, okay?   Section one is: "What is this webinar?" If I don't answer that question, that's a bad question to leave on a open loop. So some questions you can leave on an open loop. That's a bad one. That will cause confusion. Confusion is a no and they run away.   So I have to be able to introduce the webinar and then I've gotta introduce "Who the heck is talking to me and why does he have freaking stache on?"   So there's two sections in the intros.   Section one, intro the webinar.   Section two, intro the speaker.   Now for those of you guys who are pitching other people's products, that is where the issues kinda comes in a little bit. Not an issue, but that's where it gets challenging 'cause you're like do I introduce, for my case funnel building secrets, do I need to spend time introducing Russell, they still gotta know who he is or they're not gonna care what I did. What I used to do. And then I gotta introduce ClickFunnels, and the positioning gets a little bit weird.   That's why I always encourage you guys to do webinars for your own stuff, not that you have to do it but at first it's an easier pitch to go for.   So I like using this slide a lot. I use this slide multiple times." Yeah. Mr. Steve huge eyeball's Larsen, who are ya?" Why am I doing that? It's because I want them to feel like "oh, this guy's just kind of a fun guy." You know like moss. That's pretty funny. This is where you brag about yourself and if you're nervous to do that you kinda have to get over that.   So I say things like I say things like, "Hey what's up, my name's Steve Larsen, I was the lead funnel builder at ClickFunnels for two years, I built almost 500 funnels while I was there. I was Russell's right-hand guy. I helped create the original Two Comma Club Coaching Program which helped a lot of people get a million bucks and a lot of others also make six-figures which is also awesome, right? Anyway, I'm a Two Comma Club coach now and I've left that though to go and make my own Two Comma Club funnels."   And this is where I start, you gotta show off a little bit. I like to go in, now this is where that transition, I use the intro to me, they wanna know the credentials, what's the fast punch, here's the credentials, here's why you are awesome.   But the next thing though, this is why this guy's able to come speak about this stuff. Now the next thing I do though is I use this as an advantage to catapult me into the beginning of my origin story.   So the origin story here: For me, I'm gonna tell the story. Now let's go back, let's consult this real quick. Let's consult, bam. Now here's the origin story for me this is the story:   "Funnels saved my family financially after 17 business tries." This is true story, right? And I'm gonna go in and tell the story. Now I restructured just a few of the other stories in the layout, but I'm gonna use the second slide as far as who are ya as an intro to me. And I found that transition works quite well every time I do that. So this is the outline of it:   "Look, we had no money. Asked dad for money, said no, figure out how to use the resources that you have. It was out of love, he wasn't like no are you kidding, he's a rock star. And I was like crap, so I started studying different asset types and I ran into Rich Dad Poor Dad and he said there's three different asset types. I was like what if I try all of them. I chose business last." This is a true story.   "I chose business last because I thought it meant that I was greedy if I was gonna go do it. That's a real false belief I had. So I did paper assets first. That's one of the three asset types from Rich Dad Poor Dad. That's like the gateway drug for most entrepreneurs. Then next I went into real estate. I did a lot of real estate stuff. And it's not that I didn't have a little success with each one of those things but there were some things that made it challenging like in real estate, like truly, if you're gonna kill it it's best to have some money down.   Same with like paper assets, stocks and options in trading and I borrowed 15 grand. I borrowed 15 thousand dollars to go to some stock classes. I was freaking hustling.   17 tries later I ran into Russell Brunson. And I was like this guy looks like he's 13, I don't know if I'm even gonna trust him." Some of my initial reactions, kay? Just same thing as everyone else says and I was like, "Hey check it out, if you say these funnel things work let me try it. And so I did and started taking on clients and started bootstrapping my way to different things and that's how I bootstrapped my way to the event and became such a fanatic.   "Before I met Russell that they knew who I was when I got there because I was the guy always writing into support, pushing the bounds of their software. Literally their coders would go and try to keep up with some of the things I was begging for them to get done. And so when I got there I got five job offers." So I'm gonna tell that story quickly. And that's the origin story.   But I'm also gonna in and I'm gonna talk about one of the first funnels I built that was actually a good success. So that they see, right, it's a origin story.   The origin story is the backstory of why you are in the thing you are in. I'm talking about funnels so I gotta answer the question: "Why did you choose funnels?" And I gotta answer that question in a way that's slightly emotional - in a way where they can logically, although it's emotional, see how and justify: "oh it's reasonable, I see why he's doing what he's doing. That makes sense."   And when I do that, man the next three stories are really really easy to get good reactions from.   So the first thing I'm gonna do here is I'm going to introduce myself. Right? And I'm gonna talk about how I got a radio show, actually got on the radio, two times in the last few weeks. It was really fun. Oops.   There's the family and I'm like "Oh look, isn't that funny, I love that picture of my little girl putting her finger in her nose. She was supposed to be a flower girl and was walking down the aisle as a flower girl totally picking her nose." Funny picture. So I put that in there. I put that in, I'm trying to be raw. Guys, trying to be real. Why else would I wear a freaking stache right now?   Right, I'm trying to be very open like: "oh man, this dude is real." And I'm trying to help them see that. Bring your walls down, bring em down, bring em' down. That's really what I'm trying to do here. I'm gonna put the other radio show in too. 'Cause it fits the fits the audience here. Let's see. There we go. Bloop. Crazy how many downloads there are on both these now. So I'd probably put some animation in. Here I got a radio show. Gets over a thousand downloads an episode now. How cool is that? Thousand downloads an episode now.   I also have another show. It's not as old but it's already doing about 400 downloads an episode and I am obsessed.   What I want you to know is guys, I'm obsessed. I am obsessed with this game. I eat, drink, and sleep this stuff. My family's been there. They are my biggest support team ever. The whole thing starts with the family. Bam. And that's my intro into how I begin my origin story.   Cool, so it'll be like a little animation. First that one then I'll animate in the others.   Then this is where I'm gonna talk about origin story internal and external desires.   I need to go in and I need to paint a picture over my desires, right? And some conflict, the backstory. So the backstory for us and I like to use this one a lot, guys you might be noticing like, "Stephen you're using the same stuff from other webinars?" Yeah, okay? Your story can be repurposed into other things.   It doesn't need to be this brand new thing every single time.   It's still my origin story. It's not like it changed. All right? So I'm still gonna use it.   Look at that hottie (Stephen looks at a picture of his wife on their wedding day).   I can use the exact same stories. It doesn't need to be, right, and I can sell different products with it 'cause it's still the way I got into stuff. So I go in and, I tell the story:   "We got married, this is how small our apartment was."   So I'm gonna hit a wall here. I'm gonna hit a wall and this is the wall. I need to hit a wall and the wall is we got nothing. In fact look right here at this picture. You guys see this is literally a picture of our apartment. I didn't try to take it blurry on purpose, it just is blurry.   You know those lose weight commercials? Like the before pictures always like black and white suddenly no one can find a color camera anymore and they're like looking all weird at the camera. You know? And after pictures they're like shredded, suddenly the picture's in color. This looks like I tried to set it up. It's how it actually was. Any way. I was like: "Check it out, I actually drew a fireplace on the wall with a crayon. We had no money. We got married weeks before Christmas."   Suddenly it's like oh crap, it's hitting the fan, and it hit the fan. "We had no cash. I asked my dad for money I was like what if I go asked him for money." I have an epiphany. And so I like to use... So I went an I started asking, I was like "Man student loans are on the way."     We use pictures to depict different aspects of the story, okay? The pictures are just guiding the major elements in the story. You know what I mean? Let me save this quick. The pictures are guiding the elements in the story, that's all.   "So I asked for money and that's the very room, that is the building where I asked my dad for money, and he said "no, can't do it." And I was like "Crap, all right, what's my plan?" So that's the next part.   Remember guys I'm just following this thing. We're right here. We're almost done with the intro, kay? Is this making sense? You guys with me? You guys seeing how this could apply in your business? Just keep going. A bunch of trial closes all at once.   We've got 74 of us on now, this is awesome guys. Appreciate you guys being on here. Hope you guys are liking the stache. Can't wait for you guys to get yours.   So right now I gotta go plan. Here's the plan. The plan is, this thing is like falling apart. "The plan is I gotta start studying how on Earth am I supposed to make money? I don't know how to make money? I've been studying business in school, but they're not actually teaching me how to make money. So I started studying. I started studying and started learning.   One of the guys I started studying was a guy named Robert Kiyosaki. And he told me about the three different asset types, and I still got his voice in my head: "Well, the first thing you gotta do is the three different asset types."   I don't know if you guys ever listened to him but his voice kinda sounds like that.   "The three different asset types and if you're wise you're gonna go and you're gonna get one of these kinds of assets and just stick with it." And he sounds like that. And I was like, "Well, I don't know what to do. What if I try all of them? But I don't wanna try business, that sounds way too hard, I'm not gonna do that." So I was like "Ah, so I started running, running, running, and I started acting." - meaning I started, I should clarify that 'cause in one of these I say I started acting, but that sounds like I actually was an actor.   I'm gonna hit some conflict here. Now you see I'm just following it. I just make a slide per epiphany bridge script. Or epiphany bridge step here.   Boom, first thing I did is I started taking action. I should change it to that. Started taking action. Whoops. Action. Started taking action. And I went through, and I borrowed 15 grand and went and started doing this and anyway...   I know all you guys are very focused entrepreneurs here, but none of you guys have ever had shiny object syndrome? Well yeah me either, so I went ahead, and after a while, I was like "This is hard!" I was whiny.   I was whiny and I went and I checked out real estate. And I got 300 phone calls in one month. I was putting those little paper signs up all over the place. Again this is all true, I'm not making any of this up. I put those paper signs up all over the place. Looking for buyers, looking for sellers.   I got 300 phone calls and started matching buyers with sellers and doing a double escrow. I'd up the price a little bit during close and take my money, anyway. And that's what I was doing. Until I realized there really are limited options when you really still are completely broke. Flipping in that way, it's not that you can't make cash... Anyway, right?   And I need one more conflict slide here. I'm almost done with the intro, and then I'll come over here to your guy's comments and your chat, okay? If you guys got anything come let me know.   And so you see how I came up with a plan, and I walked myself going through the plan, but there's an issue with the plan. The plan was to try these three asset types, and the reason why I'm doing that is because they can logically see how that is a logical thing to do. "Yeah, why wouldn't you try that?" It's because I'm trying to them as the protagonist in my story.   They're not even gonna experience the same things that I did, but the power of story is this:   "Right now I'm sitting in my office, downstairs my little girls are playing. I can hear them right now. I can actually smell the aroma of some good food. I think my wife is making some food and if I were to walk downstairs right now we'd have our kitchen table there, and the countertop and she usually likes to put food right on the countertop, and we go serve up and then go sit at the table together." Okay, stop! How many of you guys just imagined your own office? Wait a second, and you imagined your own house? Oh, baby! Wait a second, but I'm describing MY house. But you thought about your house? Did you think about your own kitchen? I was talking about my kitchen. My kitchen table is completely perfect square, and it's brown, it's made of wood, it's beautiful. I was talking about my kitchen though. But wait you thought about your kitchen? Huh. And the countertop, did you think about the aroma of food? Did I even describe what food it was? No, but you thought about food. And you thought about good food. You thought about little kids playing and hearing them squeal around and stuff. Right. Wait a second, but I'm talking about MY story! Isn't this fascinating?   This is the power of stories. The reason stories are so powerful. If I can logically, inside the epiphany bridge script, get them to get inside my story, they will effectively have experienced, on an emotional level, the very same story that I experienced.   Even though MY kitchen's different than their kitchen. Even though MY dad told me different things than your dad might of, or regardless. Does that make sense? The power of story is that it takes the backgrounds and the experiences of each listener and it combines them emotionally even though the scenes are different - the facts are the same. The emotions can be the same. That's the key, and that's why stories are so powerful.   So what's my plan? "Oh I'm gonna, I don't know, I gotta make money," and I guarantee everyone's thought that who's been on the webinar, right? "Oh man, I gotta make money too somehow." So I gotta come up with some kind of plan, so I'm gonna do what he said, "Business assets, real estate, paper assets." So I just started doing it, and I didn't wanna seem greedy so I actually purposely didn't go for business first. Guys, that was a really stupid thing that I did, but anyway. I went straight to paper assets, and I borrowed cash.   How many of you guys have borrowed cash to go to some person's course before? Right, I know, me too. That's crazy I found out that he's actually teaching stuff he knew was outdated. Now I call that dishonest. Right? They're walking through with me: I guarantee I'm not the first person they've spent money on and not been successful with.   So then I went off on my own I just started doing more real estate stuff. I finally turned to business. I went 17 tries over the next three or four years going for these different kinds of business. How many tries have you guys gone through? Right? Have you counted them? Anyways 17 tries later I was doing two summers door-to-door sales, telemarketing, ebooks, diamonds, that was an interesting one, websites, traffic driver for Paul Mitchell, right? Anyway, and I thought the issue has gotta be me.   And I want them to say that about themselves. That's why I bring this up. You guys liking this? I was the issue. So I'm gonna use some of these same slides from a few other webinars because they work and the origin stories, it doesn't matter.   I'm still gonna change some things in the notes here and customize it based on the audience that's listening. But I can lead them down the psychology and why things are the way they are there. Kay?   "The issue must be me. 17 tries later, still not enough money to actually support us, it's gotta be me. There's no other reason. I can't even think of another reason why I haven't been successful at this game yet." Why am I saying that? How many of you guys right now there's 75 of us on right now. How many of you guys right now have asked yourself that question? Kay?   This is me doing this old story, if I know what your false beliefs are when you see this new opportunity, I use what you're saying to yourself inside of the new story. Inside of the new story. That is what combines, that is the bridge when you join in the conversation inside the customers head that's what that means.   That's why if you don't know who your customer is it's really hard to know what stories they're telling themselves and it's really hard to tell effective new stories. Very challenging.   All of this game starts with the who. Who, who, who, who, who, kay?   Anyway, I'm sure, I know, I'm positive, 99% of people have asked that question. Anyone who's successful has asked themselves that question. How come this isn't working? And they start doing this self-defeating thing, and that's fine - it's a natural thing. Every one of us has done it. But when I say I've also been through it oxytocin hit. It's the chemical of connection. It's the hardest one to get. "Man, this guy gets me."   Man we're going freaking deep. Deep! So I think through, and one of the things I wanna ask myself is what are these top entrepreneurs right, so I'm gonna pose a question here and at this point emotionally I've got them in this place where they're very open to me. They're very open to me. They've come through very similar to what  I've gone through.   I've answered questions about who this is? I've stepped to the side with them. Side by side. The positioning I'm taking:   Look little testimonial of people who've actually done what I'm talking about here so you know I'm not crazy. "Now who am I" Cool, here I am. There's some credentials now, it's actually going to the origin story itself. "Oh man, this guys actually all right. I connect with this guy. I've had the same questions in my life." Yeah, that's why I freaking talk about the stuff I do. That I came up with a plan. Have you ever done any one of these things ever? I guarantee it, right? So I have them in a point right now when I ask a question, this is very key, very key moment inside of the origin story. Where I ask the next question, and the question that I ask myself is "So is there a new way?" New way. Now I haven't brought in much of the new way yet.   . Anyway, we're almost done with the origin story here. Section one here. I haven't brought in too much new way yet. Still kinda focused on the old way but I'm gonna describe the old way through another mini story:   "So I started asking myself, what are the top entrepreneurs actually doing to make cash? Are they doing the real estate thing? I know some of them are. They're doing paper trading, paper assets, I know they are. Right?" And so I ask this question because it means they are gonna ask the question to themselves. If I pose a question, that's like cool mind control. If I said," I wonder what's in this orange bottle?" You just asked the same question, kay? I just literally entered your head - 'cause the human brain can't stand open loops. We gotta close the loop. "Wow, what is inside of this?" Right?   "How does Stephen have so much energy?" It's me entering your brain. Oh yeah. All right. "What are the top entrepreneurs actually doing to make cash?" And I wanna guide them through the section called old way. If you don't know what I'm talking about, page 114 in Expert Secrets talks about this.   Long journey. I'm sorry, this is part of plan. Right there. It's part of the new plan. And especially in a webinars this is very key. When we compare: "Look how crazy it was compared to what's happened now. Do you wanna know how?" Awesome, the rest of the presentation's about that. Does that make sense?   This is one of the ways you hook them to the end. Right here:   "So I said, man, what they weren't doing as I started looking around what I started noticing is that every one of these guys, none of them, none of them had websites. None of them did. Right? Not ones that are cash flowing 'cause no one could get them to cash flow. They were doing VC funding. They didn't have business plans and this went against everything I had been studying and learning, went against all my marketing degree. Everything that I had been doing up until that point."   Now let's see where we are right now. Conflict, right? So for me, I'm trying to help them see logically where I'm coming up from. And "I started studying I realized what they did have was this thing called a sales funnel." Kay?   And we're not on new way yet I'm just duplicating the slides here and honestly by the time I get through origin story on a webinar I'm typically around like 30 minutes. "Guess what they did have? Sales funnel."   All right I'm leading them through this epiphany as I go through it, kay? I was like "What's a freaking sales funnel? What's a sales funnel? That looks like a website. I don't know, I got a website, I know what to do. But I started studying all these different guys, and I ran into this guy..."   Okay, and this is where we start getting into again plan. New plan again: "I ran into this guy that looked like he was 13 years old. Is he even old enough to shave? I don't know. Should I even trust what he's saying? And I started studying his stuff, and I became a fanatic."   I like to have these things pop out as I talk about it.   So I'm like, "I ran into this guy named Russell Brunson I didn't know who he was. Is this dude even? I wonder if he's legit? Does he shave?" You know what I mean? And again I'm entering the objection that's inside their head. Right? They might be like, "He looks really young..." so I'm gonna say that "He looks really young."   It's interesting how much you can control this stuff. I'm gonna ruin you guys, I'm gonna ruin you guys.   Last night my wife and I were talking late, we were just chatting, and she's been asking a lot about sales psychology stuff and it's been kinda fun and she's getting into a lot of real estate stuff. I actually truly love real estate still. It's something you use a lot of, anyway.   Funnels are a great way to get a ton of cash real quick. What do you do with it once you got it? So real estate is the way we're moving. So she's diving into real estate guru-ism, and I'm being the funnel guy. Dance like a monkey in front of the camera guy.   So anyway, and I make these each pop up. And I was like: "Man, let me show you, so you guys know what I'm talking about. I saw this guy and his name was Russell Brunson and I was looking at him and I was like there's no way this guy knows what he's talking about. So let me... Let's see if it works? Like, check this guy out. I saw this course he had called DotCom Secrets, and I got it. Remember I've gone through 17 tries here. Suddenly things started working. I was like what the heck and I became kind of a Russell fanatic. I got his book DotCom Secrets then I went through Dot Com Secrets Ignite. Then I actually went through 108 Split Tests. I carried it in my backpack for months. Then I got the Perfect Webinar, this guy's crazy. I'm actually making cash from this. And again I was keeping it small 'cause I kept testing with all these little clients I was getting, but lo and behold stuff started working."   Anyways, so that's kinda how I roll it out like that as I'm saying it.   "And the biggest thing I learned from him was exactly what he was talking about which is this..." And this is where I really dive into new way/case study.   Now in this scenario I've actually done new way and case study, I'm doing both. So for the first one here I'm actually gonna do here's the new way, then I'm gonna walk through a case study just to destroy any additional false beliefs that people might have, kay?   This mustache is starting to get a little itchy.   The biggest thing I realized is that, all right, you guys I'm gonna start right there, again I'm using things from other things I've already created before.   A lot of things, if you've already made something like it's an asset forever, not just for just that business you're selling or whatever: "The biggest thing I realized is that funnels make me money and websites make me broke" Later on, I talk about a website, one of my very first websites and I show it to you. It's very funny. Anyways that's coming up in the plans. It's terrible. It was completely awful. It was for an artist. And so what I'm gonna talk about in this next little bit here is I'm actually gonna walk them through a crappy funnel that I had at the very very beginning.   We are now in case study. We've just gone through new way so now we're gonna dive through case study. Let me just clone this a couple times here. And I'm the case study, that's fine. Again if you don't have a bunch of testimonials, it's okay to be the case study on your own. So I'm the case study in this case. Which I have been. And I'm walking them through my origin story. They're still logically following me:   "This is one of the first funnels I built that was actually quite profitable. This is my crappy CD funnel. And I went through and I actually creating these different funnels and literally funnel hacking Russell. This is, I made this, I don't know, I got a ClickFunnels account very shortly after ClickFunnels left beta like a month or two afterwards. And that's one of the first ones I built. So this is like three and a half years old. But this is what I did. I literally modeled what he did. And so I went through and I just modeling exactly what he did and I went in and I bought everything in his funnel. Everything. All right so you guys can see this. I bought everything in his funnel. Every little piece in there."   And remember what I'm going through right here is I'm going through origin story to break that down a little bit more:   "I had no money so then I starting studying assets then I started building funnels."   I'm gonna compare a then versus now and that's what's coming up. That's why I'm doing this. A then versus now which is very powerful:   "I bought everything inside of his funnel, and I saw exactly everything that was in there I was like 'crap,' this might as well be my business model, why would I do anything different?"   "This is the beginnings of one of my very first funnels ever, and next thing I did is I sketched out the funnel itself. I don't like the little, I like centering it. I sketched out the funnel itself. Sweet I did the 7.95 thing, a 97 dollar thing, a 297 thing, and that was it. I was like sweet. I did the exact same thing literally. So my funnel after I went and did it looked exactly like this. This was it. Looked exactly like this. Then I built the entire funnel. And that was it, that was the funnel."   And so remember this is a case study so now the results need to come on in. So let's talk about the results:   "And the results are in. I was like what the heck. I made 18 thousand dollars in student loans my first year of marriage. And this funnel in a year did 60 grand with no ads spend. What! Completely changed our life. Totally changed our life you guys. 100%. This completely changed our life. That make sense?"   Kay, now I got them in this really interesting spot, and I'm like what if... Let's go back here to our assets. Conflict:   My funnel sucked, and I'm gonna talk about that:   "Guys, it did not do that at first. It was terrible. It was only after I modeled what I saw that Russell guy doing."   So the old way, right, the old way I don't build the funnel first. So that's one thing I didn't talk about up here is I went:   "he first time I went, and I built this thing sucked! Sucked! Everyone say sucked! It was terrible. I lost so much money.  It was crazy kinds of money. Time, I lost a lot of time. I didn't know what I was doing and this did not sell well at all. And I'm like well I might as well go in and free plus shipping funnel, right? The results are in, and we made 60 grand from that but how cool is that?"   Now I'm gonna do a then versus now. That's what this is called in script building. I'm gonna do a then versus now. Let's go back over here. New way/case study. Then versus now, right here. I'm talking about results so we're right here so then versus now so I'm gonna go in and I'm gonna grab the results from and those are pretty good. Not bad, not bad. That was okay:   "But you've gotta understand I did way better  - in a years time I was doing about four grand a month:   "The funnel's success had everything to do with the way I built funnels after this."   Had nothing to do, meaning literally the order of the way I built things in and what I wanna go through for the remainder of this is to show you this, check this out:   "The first time I went, and I launched it we did 60 grand, not bad. I know you guys are like "oh" but check this out: "This is the first month of the new way launching the exact same product. Look at that. Almost exactly the same amount of money in one month with no ad spend. That was in one month. So you guys, isn't that interesting? So I wanna share with you guys, alright so here's old way..."   Again we're pulling old way verse new way. So let's grab a text box. This making sense? It's making dollars. Alright, this is the old way. What! Let's make that text white, we'll make shape fill that red. Bam old way. Here. And that's pretty good, awesome. What! I wanna talk about the new way, though. And I'm gonna have this automate in at the exact same time. (Stephen finishes working on the intro to the script.)   Oh yeah!   Hey, obviously a funnel's already dead if you can't even get anyone to opt in, right? So I spent four hours teaching an audience how to get high opt-ins. When they work, and when they don't.   If you want access to that member's area where you can watch those replays, just go to freeoptincourse.com to create your free members account now.  

In this episode of Building Infinite Red, Jamon, Ken, and Todd touch on the fears, anxieties, and struggles of running a business. They share stories and thoughts on starting a business, managing stress, how success and failure impact focus, the difference between venture capital and other sources of funding, fear of missing out, and the importance of knowing what you stand for. Show Links & Resources YNAB: Personal budgeting software Four Yorkshiremen by Monty Python Episode Transcript TODD WERTH: So I thought a good topic today, one of the reasons because I'm personally interested actually, hear what Jamon has to say and Ken has to say, and of course I'm sure they're interested to hear what I have to say. But the topic is when you start a new business or you're an entrepreneur doing multiple businesses, or anything of that particular area. What are some of the biggest fears, anxieties, apprehensions, that you might have you know before the process, during the process, whenever? I find this very fascinating, because I imagine a lot of people, well maybe some people who are listening are experiencing these right now and A) it'd be great to hear someone else express the same thing so they know that they're not alone in this, and B) it's kind of interesting to think about yourself. It kind of, it's not something you typically sit down and think about, so if you two don't mind, that'd be a really interesting subject for today. KEN MILLER: Sounds good. JAMON HOLMGREN: Yeah. Well I think back to when I started by business. It was 2005, and I was working for a home builder at the time, so I had a, you know, decent job. It was an office job. I was doing I think cad design and marketing for this builder. Not really doing programming. But I decided that one of the things that ... well I had, prior to this time, I had thought, you know I'd be really nice to own my own business at some point. It'd be something that I would aspire to. And I think that part of that was my dad owning his own business and knowing a lot of entrepreneurs kind of played into that. I thought it would be an interesting thing. I've always been a little bit independent. Want to kind of set my own course. So I started thinking about doing this and talking with my wife, and at the time I had a six month old baby. That was my first kid, my son, who is now 13 years old. Around actually this time of year is when I decided that I was going to do this. What helped was an opportunity that came up. So the apprehension of how do I get my first customer was sort of already taken care of. My uncle had a bunch of work that he needed done, and he asked me if I wanted to do it kind of on the side, or as a business, and that gave me the confidence to pull the trigger and say, let's so this. Because I had a built-in customer right away. But I do remember the first month sending my bill over to him, and it was only eleven hundred dollars, and that was all I had earned that whole month was eleven hundred dollars. And that was a wake up call to me that, hey I can't just expect the money to come in, and that was definitely ... I sat up and noticed. TODD: Yeah, that's really interesting. So when you started ClearSight, that was your first company, correct? At that time? JAMON: That's right. Yeah, ClearSight. There were other points along the way where I was sort of I got kind of gut-punched. Many times along the way. One was when ... my first business was doing websites, but it was also doing CAD designs, so I had essentially two business, and the CAD design part of it, you know designing homes, designing remodels, those sort of things eventually dried up, because remember that was during 2008, 2009 the housing recession kind of came along and that impacted the designers first, because we were the first ones in the process. People stopped taking money, equity out of their homes to do remodels. They just stopped doing it. So basically the whole market dried up. I remember my uncle told me, "I don't have any work to send you anymore." And I had a few accounts myself, but they were pretty slow too. And I kind of sat at home for a few days and felt sorry for myself. But in typical Jamon fashion, I was like, well I guess it's time to go do this myself, so I went out and literally started knocking on doors at offices and stuff and handing out my business card. Wasn't too successful at that, but it was at least doing something, and then things turned around eventually. TODD: Since you had a new baby at home, and obviously you're married, and you're trying to support them. JAMON: Right. TODD: Did that add any worry to you at that time? JAMON: Yeah, for sure. It certainly did, because any worry that my wife felt was reflected back on me because I feel very a sense of responsibility that I need to be making sure that we're not losing our house. Making sure that we can keep food on the table, things like that. So that was a lot to process. My health definitely suffered because of it and a few other things, but there was a lot of stress involved with that. I think that if I were to go back now, knowing what I know now, I could very much have probably pulled out of it much faster. I could have found a better path, but you live and learn. TODD: I'm sure there's more to tell about that story, but I'm curious to hear your thoughts Ken. KEN: For me the biggest worry was always money. Right? I mean, since I came out here to Silicon Valley, I had the dream. I had the Silicon Valley dream for sure. I wanted to start my own company. And to a certain degree, the Silicon Valley dream as sold is not sold accurately. Right? It's sold as this sort of fantasy. And the truth of the matter is you have to have more resources than is reputed in order to do the Silicon Valley way effectively. You need to know VCs or people who know them. It helps to have affluent parents who can bankroll you not making any money for years and years and years. I'm luckier than most on all of those accounts, and even I found that very intimidating, challenging. And especially living in the Bay Area, once you have established a life in the Bay Area, the idea of not taking a salary for a couple of years is utterly terrifying if you don't have a big pile of money. In fact, I wasn't really able to do this until I had a little bit of a windfall from the Yammer acquisition to lean on. Basically just enough to let me barely scrape by for a year for which I'm still very grateful 'cause I probably wouldn't be here today if I hadn't had that. And there were some scary fricking moments. There've definitely been a few extremely close calls financially. So I don't ... that fear I think was justified and surmountable. Let me put it that way. Right? You can definitely figure that one out, but I'm not gonna lie. It can be super scary sometimes. For me, the biggest mental shift that got me where I am now is that I had always had in my head this sort of venture capital model, because that's what I knew. Right? Because that's the kind of company I'd worked for. I saw how that process basically worked. But it always felt wrong to me. Right? Like, I was always like, what's so wrong with profit? What's so wrong with actually making a business that can support itself fairly early on? And I think it was the Paul Graham post that was like, the difference between a start up and a small business. And a start up is specifically optimized for hundred S growth or nothing. JAMON: Right. KEN: And that's what venture capitalists want for the most part. Right? No venture capitalist wants you to be one of the nine or ninety-nine that don't make it. JAMON: Mm-hmm (affirmative)- KEN: Nevertheless, the model is set up that way. The model is set up so that only one in ten or less have to make it. And so once I realized, oh no all along I wanted to make the lifestyle business, basically, the small business. TODD: I just wanted to point out that especially in Silicon Valley the term lifestyle business is a semi-derogatory term. KEN: Pejorative, yeah. TODD: Yeah to refer to a normal, actual business. KEN: Exactly. TODD: And I always found that amusing when they said lifestyle business it was insulting you, because you make a profit. I always thought that was funny. KEN: Yeah, right. It's sort of like the Silicon Valley model is for people who would rather be a billionaire or nothing. Right? It's kinda like a shot at a billionaire is worth way more to them then a pretty good path to a millionaire. Once I realized that that was the exact opposite of me, I was much happier and I could actually work towards something that mattered. Right? And not even the millionaire part, right? It's like, if that happens, that would be awesome, but it's more creating the environment that I wished that I'd had. JAMON: When it comes to fears and those types of feelings, do you ever feel maybe that you are missing out on those wild rides? KEN: Do I have FOMO for the- JAMON: Yeah, a little bit of FOMO. KEN: Sometimes. JAMON: FOMO being, of course, fear of missing out. KEN: Yeah, living here especially. I think that's inevitable. JAMON: Right. Because we're not set up for just rocket growth at Infinite Red. KEN: I've been at enough companies that ended up making everybody thousandaires or worse. Right? Or negative thousandaires in at least one case. I had a friend, he seemed like he was living the dream. This was way back when in the first boom. Right? He seemed like he'd lived the dream. Right? He was just an engineer at a start up and he was suddenly a millionaire overnight. And then within six month, he was a negative six hundred thousandaire with a gigantic tax bill. JAMON: Oof. KEN: The whole model has kind of lured a bunch of people into the stock option thing. This is what I'm talking about specifically. I think there is absolutely a place for the venture capital model, but the stock option compensation model that a lot of people have done, is kind of a raw deal in a lot of ways, but that'd be a whole other topic, so- JAMON: Yes TODD: Just real quick, I own tons of stock and stock options that are worth absolutely zero- KEN: Yes. TODD: But, if I ever run out of toilet paper, I am set. JAMON: So Todd, you started a business well before Ken or I, and you know I actually I don't know if I've ever heard the story of your very first business and how you went from being a software engineer at a company to owning your own business, and I'd like to hear about that from the perspective of the topic of this episode which is about fears, and uncertainty and things like that. TODD: Yeah. Yeah. That's great question, so I've owned three businesses. This hopefully is my last one here at Infinite Red. My first one was in 1999. We started, it was three of us, it was also a consulting company like Infinite Red which lasted for nine years. It was a little bit different. Real quick, we did mainly enterprise, not start ups, larger companies, that kind of stuff. And our model was kind of to be subcontractors. So we had a lot of relationships with other consulting companies. One of the things we did, is we did really hard things well. So all the other consulting companies, like especially at that time it's gonna sound funny, but you'd have companies coming to us saying, "Look, we're doing most of the project, but they want something on the web, and we have no idea how to do that." And we did. And we knew Visual C++ and we knew all sorts of things. And so we specialize. We were higher priced because of that, and we'd come in and do the fun parts, in our opinion, which was really great. This is circa 1999. That one wasn't ... there wasn't too much anxiety from it. It was a small company, so later I'll talk about most of my anxiety at Infinite Red come from my worry of the 25 families I'm responsible for. JAMON: Right. TODD: It's not so much myself, because I do not have affluent parents. Well, most of my relatives are dead now, but I never really worried about money. I mean worst case scenario, I can be a developer. I'm pretty darn good developer, and I can make good money at that. And I moved out of the Bay Area, so for me my lifestyle is much cheaper than it used to be. So I don't worry about that so much, but I do worry about everyone's families who work at Infinite Red. My first company, we didn't have that. It was all just high level people. There was three to six of us, depending on the time. And we kind of just slipped into it. We had our first few big customers before we even started. So that wasn't really stressful at all. The second company, which came after my first company, I went back and worked for companies, for other start ups as an employee, and that's how I met Ken. Ken was my boss. And I was doing that mainly just 'cause after nine years running your company, I was just kind of tired, and I wanted to be an employee for a while. And I did that for about three, three and half years. And Ken, sorry boss, it was super relaxing, easy. You work like seven and a half hours a day or whatever. KEN: This has been noted on your permanent file. TODD: You know, regular jobs often are pretty lax compared to start ups. As an aside, I was in a pizza parlor once, and I saw a sign behind the wall. It was obviously the pizza parlor was owned by a person, it wasn't a chain, and the sign said, the only thing more overrated then running your own business is pregnancy. Which is true, if you do it for low hours and high pay, you really should rethink that, but there are lots of great reasons to do it. Any who, my second company was venture capital backed company which means we didn't use our own money. It was intentionally designed to do the hockey stick which means go from zero to very high very fast, and we had investors. And we had to pitch to venture capitalists and angel investors, and we had all the kind of normal Silicon Valley stuff. And that lasted for about a year and a half, and I cherish that experience, because it taught me a lot about that process from the inside. It was completely a failure which is fine. The fears in that, once again, were not personal, because as I did right after that, I went and got a job with Ken. JAMON: Right. TODD: And I made plenty of personal money. And because we weren't investing our money, the VCs were, there really wasn't a lot of anxiety there. I would say the main anxiety there was performance. Meaning it's kind of depressing when you're failing, and sometimes you have a great success. We did one month, especially. And we were shooting to the moon for a whole month, and it was super exciting. So it was just kind of a roller coaster of anxiety for that kind of business. Yeah, Jamon? JAMON: I think it's really interesting to hear you and Ken talk about the idea of, well I can just go get a job as a developer. Because for the longest time, I didn't feel that I had that option. Whether that was reality or not, I don't know. I was basically, I kind of thought of myself as just building websites. I just built websites for people, and I didn't really think of myself as a software engineer. I just happen to be someone that happened to built websites. TODD: Knowing you Jamon, and the quality of engineer you are, you are completely wrong. You could have totally got a job, but I get why- JAMON: Yeah. TODD: -from your perspective you felt that way. KEN: Yeah, well and it's a matter of ... it highlights how important just knowing the scene is. JAMON: Right. Yeah, totally. KEN: If you know the scene, yeah if you're an engineer, even like an old rusty engineer, like we're going to be before too long. TODD: Too late, Ken. KEN: Right. JAMON: Too soon and too late. KEN: Even if you're an old rusty engineer, you can figure it out. Right? JAMON: Right, yeah. KEN: The demand is so overwhelming and so consistent and so pervasive that- JAMON: Yeah. KEN: -if you know sort of the ins and outs- TODD: Even you Jamon could get a job is what you're saying. JAMON: Even I could get a job. KEN: No, if you're half-way competent, and he's more than half-way competent, about 60 percent. JAMON: I appreciate it. KEN: No, it's- JAMON: 60 percent. Yeah. No, and to hear that now. It's something that is obviously more of an option now that I don't need it, but at the time it didn't feel like an option, and so especially when I started getting employees in 2009. And most of them were young. They didn't have much in the way of family, but they would obviously still have ... they needed jobs, and I felt that. I felt that in every part of me that if the business wasn't doing well, that I was failing them. And that actually drove me for a long time. I think if I'd had the option to go work for someone, or felt I had the option to go work for someone, I may have actually quit at some point. But I didn't. I kept the course there. KEN: I will say, that I'm glad that I did not know everything that I should be afraid of going into it. 'Cause there is plenty that you should be afraid of, and if I'd known all that stuff going in, I probably wouldn't have done it, and I'm glad that I did it. And if I had to redo it now, I would do it again. JAMON: Right. KEN: And that's an important distinction is that it's not that I would do it again, it's that only hearing the bad stuff at that point, would have been a disaster. TODD: Ignorance and hubris are the two best tools of the entrepreneur. JAMON: I feel like it's both more stressful and more scary than you think, but also you're more resourceful and more able to deal with it then you think. KEN: Yes. TODD: Hundred percent. I would say, talking to other people who are new to it, and I certainly had to learn this, the biggest problem is the buck stops here. Meaning in every other situation where you worked, you could always throw a problem up the ladder. JAMON: Yes. TODD: And when you're a small business person, you don't know accounting? Doesn't matter. Do it. JAMON: Someone's gotta do the accounting. TODD: Right, like there's literally no excuse. There's none, and you don't have that money just to pay for people to do it. KEN: I guarantee the IRS does not grade on a curve. TODD: No, they don't care about your excuses. KEN: Yeah. TODD: So Jamon, Ken, and I come from very different places. So Ken obviously went to Harvard. He's impressive on paper. I actually did not. I didn't finish college. I started making way too much money as a programmer to be honest. But when I first started out in 1996 as a professional programmer, you know I wasn't making tons of money, but it was plenty for me, because where I'm from, it's a lot of money. And at that time, I'd probably be more like Jamon meaning I didn't see myself as really deserving that kind of stuff, but this was in San Francisco in 1996. So I saw the first boom, and then I saw the crash, and then I saw the second boom. And after a while, you start to learn, although I don't have Ken's personal background. I do have Ken's professional background. JAMON: Mm-hmm (affirmative)- Yep. TODD: And so, one of the things I've noticed when talking to Jamon, because he's in Vancouver, Washington, and not around that stuff as much, is he feels a little bit like an imposter. He's totally not. And I bet even now in his mind he imagines that those people working at Google somehow have this huge, amazing, genius to them, and Ken's probably in the middle. He probably thinks some of them do. I personally have yet to meet one of these fabled geniuses. So the more you get involved with that, the more you realize they're just humans, and you're just as good as they are. KEN: That is true. JAMON: I think that's been something that I've become more and more aware of over the past several years. And it's funny because I don't usually think of myself as having imposter syndrome. I'm actually quite a confident guy, but in that regard I definitely did not really realize ... it felt like they were a different breed. They were a different type of person. And I always felt like I could probably learn anything, but there was still this degree of separation. But, anyway, coming back to the topic at hand, I think that sort of uncertainty and fear can be a motivating factor. But one of the things, so one of the things I'd like to talk about, is there are healthy ways and unhealthy ways to handle that stress, and I've done them all. Believe me. TODD: Like cocaine? JAMON: Maybe. TODD: Jamon's mother, he's totally joking. He's never done cocaine. JAMON: Yes, thank you Todd. And my mom does listen to this, so thanks Todd. TODD: He really has not, trust me. JAMON: You wouldn't want to see me on cocaine. KEN: Oh god. Yeah, that is the wrong drug for you my friend. JAMON: Yes. KEN: Oof. JAMON: But you don't want to transfer stress to clients. You don't want to transfer stress to employees. You don't want to transfer it to your significant other. To your family. And unfortunately, I've done all of those things, because I'm human and that's what happens. You get a lot of stress, and then you feel like you need to let off steam. One of the things that I actually really appreciated about this partnership is that we're able to let off steam with each other. And in a way, that is healthy. That isn't transferring to someone else who has nothing to do with it or has no power. Where I have two partners who are actually in the same spot, and they can help. It's been really, really helpful. So that is really important. I think how you transfer stress. Yeah, Todd? TODD: I agree. I don't kick the dog. I kick Ken. Which is better. The dog appreciates it at least. JAMON: You don't even have a dog, Todd. TODD: I don't have a dog, and I've never kick a dog by the way. I'd kick humans all day long, but never a dog. JAMON: This is true. TODD: Just to be clear. JAMON: Yes, Todd is the one who canceled a meeting because he had to bring a bird to the hospital that had hit his door, actually one time. TODD: It's true. It is true, and that bird is flapping happily today. KEN: As far as you know. TODD: I hope. Back to my story, because it's all about me. Anxiety at Infinite Red really does come around to team members mostly, and you two Ken and Jamon because I don't want to let you down, and I certainly don't want someone's family not to be able to have a Christmas because of something stupid I did, or because I was acting emotionally when I should have been acting rationally. That kind of stuff. JAMON: This year, me not having Christmas had nothing to do with you Todd, so I can let you know that. TODD: Jamon's house was burglarized and burnt down. Not burnt down, but set afire on Christmas Eve. KEN: Torched. TODD: So, if you're feeling good about humanity up to this point, now you can feel bad about it. So, there you go, but they're back in their house. KEN: You're welcome. TODD: Everything's good. JAMON: Yes. TODD: You're back in your house. Everything's good, and he has a wonderful family, and all is well. JAMON: Yeah, it's really nice to be back. Anyway, I cut you off. TODD: But so that's a lot of my anxieties about it. At my age, I'm 46, and I've done this a long time. I don't stress as often. Like I used to get very stressed out doing sales calls or that kind of stuff. I've done all that stuff enough where it doesn't really bother me too much. Even tough things where you have to be really tough with the client, or vendor, or something like that. It doesn't, I mean it bothers me temporarily of course you get the adrenaline going and no one likes that. But it's really the things that give me anxiety and up at night is if I make a mistake that will cause us not to be able to pay payroll. JAMON: Yeah. TODD: Now, one note. We've always paid payroll. JAMON: Yeah. TODD: But that is something- KEN: There's been some close calls. TODD: That is something that- KEN: Yeah. TODD: That makes me work harder, and it makes me worry. Me, personally, I could figure it out, it's not as big of a deal to me. KEN: Well, I think also a big stressor that I didn't ... it makes sense in retrospect, but it wasn't one that like occurred to me, is how hard it is to maintain focus over time- JAMON: Mm-hmm (affirmative) TODD: Yeah. KEN: -when you don't have a boss doing that for you. I was a small scale boss at my previous jobs, but this experience definitely makes me want to write a nice little note of apology to every boss I've ever had. Like, however bad they were, I have more sort of sympathy for what they were dealing with then I did before. TODD: That's so true. KEN: Yeah, and the surprising thing is how hard it is to cope with success. When you're doing well, that's when the monster of de-focusing really starts to rear its head. It's like driving a car fast. If you've never driven a car at 150 miles an hour, it's a different thing from driving it at 60 miles an hour. It takes a little getting used to that state, oh things are going well, but that doesn't mean that I get to take my eyes off the road. TODD: Mm-hmm (affirmative)- KEN: So. CHRIS MARTIN: Can you guys go in a little deeper on how you manage some of these things? 'Cause you've talked about having the feelings of stress and fear, but maybe some of the ways that you manage it, a part from kicking Ken. KEN: That's Todd's favorite. TODD: Well, Ken mentioned that success can be hard to deal with, and I have a tried and true technique I've used for many years with dealing with the problems of success. And here it is. And I'll share it with you. I normally would charge for this advice, but I'm gonna share. Don't be successful. There you go. KEN: Yeah. TODD: You're welcome. KEN: That one we're still figuring out. Having co-founders you actually trust is probably the number one. TODD: Yeah, it's hard to do, and at one time in my career I said I would never ever had a partner or a co-founder again. And here we are, so. JAMON: I think getting together in person is important. Of course, we're a remote company. So I'm up here near Portland, and Ken's in the Bay Area, and Todd's in Vegas, but we did get together a couple weeks ago to talk. And there was a stressful situation going on, and that was something that we went through together in person. TODD: Well, we also hang out in zoom a lot. JAMON: Yeah. TODD: Every week. And that's similar. But, yeah having good co-founders who are your friends, and you become almost married at a point, because when you're in business together it is like a marriage, and you know everyone's finances. You know if someone's spouse is having problems with the way the company's working. You have to deal with that- JAMON: Mm-hmm (affirmative)- TODD: -at least as an auxiliary person in that particular thing. So it's a very intimate thing for sure. I definitely choose that very, very, very wisely. I've had bad experiences, and of course I've had great experiences here. JAMON: I think that one of the things that we actually do fairly well is we will say when we're stressed. You know, we'll say, "Hey, I am currently feeling a high degree of stress." And then the other co-founders can say, "Okay, what is causing this." And we can talk about it more objectively. And just saying it out loud sometimes is a way to kind of like let go of it a little bit. TODD: We also know how to fight which takes a while. That's a hard one to learn. JAMON: It is. TODD: But we've learned how to fight. Yell at each other, and know that afterwards we're going to be okay, and that's important. JAMON: Yeah. TODD: The trust that you would gain with a girlfriend or boyfriend or your spouse- KEN: Sibling TODD: -where you can have an emotional throw up as it were and know that you're still gonna be loved as it were. KEN: Well, and also it's sort of on the focusing issue, actually. It's relevant there too which is that I'm pretty ADD I would say. I think that's probably pretty common I would say for entrepreneurs. Entrepreneurship is one place where you can actually challenge your ADD tendencies. However, I also know it's like, "Hey guys, I'm having some trouble focusing and motivating on x, y, and z- JAMON: Right. KEN: -can I have help with knowing that there's not going to be any judgment coming along- JAMON: Right. KEN: -with that help?" JAMON: Right. Yeah. TODD: To be clear, it's all not roses. Sometimes one of us gets irritated with the other person because of these issues and- JAMON: Right. TODD: -but ultimately once we get talking to it, we're not super human. Sometimes I get irritated with Jamon or Ken and vice versa. But the whole point is, when you get to the end of that, you're supportive. JAMON: Another really important thing is to have some really core principles. Some kind of tent poles so-to-speak that you can come back to. One of the things that we really strongly believe is that the core of us three is one of the most important things about this company. And so we can come back to that. I mean, if the most important thing that we had was some technology or some financial goal or something like that, then it would put a lot of stresses on our relationship, but since we've made that relationship such a high priority, it's extremely important. And another thing, along those lines, is we recognize that we are human, and that sometimes it's actually a personal situation that's contributing to work stress. TODD: Yes. JAMON: You might have situation where maybe a family member has health issues or you're having trouble with a relationship, or anything along those lines, and we ... I was actually talking to an employee recently who talked about a personal situation that they were having and how it was contributing to their stress, and I had noticed the stress that they were going through at work, but I didn't know about the personal situation, and it's okay. I told them, "It's fine. It's a normal, human thing to have situations that arise. I understand. It's something that you can tell us, if there's something going on, you don't have to be specific. You don't have to tell us private information, but just tell us that something's going on, and we will do our best to be as understanding as possible." TODD: And it's a matter of trust. That particular person trusted Jamon. That's fantastic. It's trust that we build up between founders. It's trust with the team, and to some extent, trust with your customers, and your vendors. Especially with customers and vendors, if you can do that, that's fantastic, but the others you can do with time. Just to give you an example, trust. I try to be trusting even when I shouldn't be. I picked up this guy the other day, in my car, he gets in the backseat. I just picked him up. I didn't know him, and first he gets in, understandably he's like, "Thanks for picking me up, but how do you know I'm not a serial killer?" TODD: And I just looked at him. I'm like, "What's the chance two serial killers would be in the same car?" Pretty low. So, yeah trust is very important. Any other tools or techniques that you all have for dealing with these anxieties or stresses or whatever? KEN: Drinking. Drinking is important. Water. Water. JAMON: Lots of water. KEN: What do you think I meant? Oh, come one. JAMON: Yes, stay hydrated. KEN: Yes, stay hydrated. Yeah. JAMON: Actually, along those lines, I started working out a couple years ago, and that has been a really good help for my stress level. When I get through with a workout, I feel better about myself. I feel good. There's probably some endorphins or something that come with that. And it's really hard when you are really critically needed at work to take two hours to go workout, but it's also extremely important for your long-term health. And so you have to prioritize it very high. And you can basically justify it to yourself which I had to do with if I go and do this, I will be better equipped to handle the issues that come up, and it's so true. Working out has been a very good thing for my stress level. TODD: A lot of people might be worried about their finances or their spouse's opinion and that kind of stuff. Which can be super challenging, so you have to deal with that. Another thing that I've noticed is, and this is pretty common, especially in our world, and I have to remember that 110 years ago, Ken'll tell me a real number, but somewhere around there. Most people worked at home, and most people had their own business. They didn't call it their own business, they were just a blacksmith, and people paid you to hoove their horses or not hoove. JAMON: Shoe. TODD: Shoe. KEN: Shoe. TODD: Shoe their horses. Thank you. It's been a while since I've lived on the farm about 30 years, but anyway- JAMON: It's that a farrier or something? TODD: Huh? JAMON: Ken, isn't it- KEN: A farrier. JAMON: Yeah, it's a farrier. KEN: That sounds right. TODD: Whatever that means. Anyways, so you would just do that. You'd just offer your services and that was a home business quote unquote. But, you know, since we all grew up in the late 20th century or the 21st century, for our younger listeners, you know that has been not the normal but the minority. And so a lot of people I've talked with, they said, "Well, can I do that? Do I have the permission to do that or whatever?" And it is kind of hard to get to their skull like who are you asking permission from? There isn't ... there is the government who has rules, but despite what you might think about the government, the rules are actually fairly basic and the IRS of course wants you to pay the money, but that's actually not the difficult to be honest either. So it's just really an internal stumbling block. You don't have to ask anyone. You can go right now. Get a business license, and sell bottles of water at a popular park. Right now, and you technically have a small business. JAMON: Regarding the personal finances side of this, one of the things that my wife and I did early on that really helped was we did a monthly budget. So we used the tool called YNAB, youneedabudget.com, and we sat down every month together, and we entered all of our receipts and we had categories and we split everything up. We were kind of finance nerds during this time, and that was helpful, because it gave us a sense of control over our finances. We knew where we were. We knew whether we had enough money to pay the mortgage. We knew how much, we could specifically tell you what day we would run out of money if we couldn't bring anything in, and that was helpful. Now, sometimes the math brings its own anxiety, but at least you know where it is, and it's not this unknown out there all the time. Actually, more lately, we've gotten away from that. After almost 15 years of marriage, and I kind of want to go back to it, because there are some stresses that come from not knowing. TODD: Yeah, sometimes everything is just fine, but just don't know it, and you assume the worst because- JAMON: Exactly. TODD: -people do. So I have a question for Ken. I grew up very poor, just some background, but later in my early 20s and stuff, my family actually started doing pretty well. My mom and my step-father ran a couple businesses. My brother started businesses and has done very well for himself. So, although, in my younger life, we were almost less than working class, to be honest. Later in life, we had a lot of experience with business. So me being in business was very natural to me, and my family understood, and they actually didn't understand when I was working for someone else. It was weird to them, but Ken, I know from discussions with you, the opposite was true. From your family, there wasn't anyone who were business people and that kind of stuff, and it was kind of outside your culture. I would love to hear if maybe that caused any particular issues for you? KEN: Yeah, for sure. I grew up in what I would call kind of professional slash academic class household. Right? College degrees going very far back in my family. Doctors, lawyers, scientists, illustrators, artists, also but professionals of various kinds. Going back quite a while. There was a flavor of business being looked down upon a little bit, and that was definitely, even when I got to Harvard. There was that divide was still there even though Harvard certainly has both types. The professional type to kind of like, well I'm good at something. I'm really good at this, and I'm so good at it people want to pay me good money for it. And that's a perfectly good life. And I'm actually here to tell you right now, if you have those skills. If you are happy doing them, you're in a good position. Should you start a business? The answer is probably no. Right? I did it because I couldn't stand not doing it. Right? It was just this terrifying but enticing thing for as long as I could remember to be ... I just wanted to be on my own. I want to do this. Ah. Right. It was this dragon inside that I couldn't contain. In some degrees, it made me a bad employee. Sometimes. Right, because anybody who's not doing what they're sort of supposed to be doing is not happy. Right? Jamon, do you want to interject? JAMON: Oh, I just want to say in Ken's family if you say someone is a painter, that means that they are an artist, and they paint on canvas. In my family, if someone's a painter, that means they spray paint on houses. KEN: Yes. TODD: In my family, if someone's a painter you're like, "Oh, he's got a job. That's wonderful." KEN: Yeah, so the three of us we talk about this class stuff all the time because when you start talking with people who grew up in different backgrounds, you start to realize what your blind spots are. Like, I remember Todd saying, growing up people who went to the movies were rich or something like that. Todd, do you remember what some of your things were? TODD: Oh, there's a long list of what rich people do that most people would find amusing. KEN: For me, not only ... I grew up in a fairly prosperous town. I would say. Right, but I wouldn't call it, there weren't a lot of rich, rich, rich people, but it was prosperous. And then going to Harvard, of course you get exposed to all sorts, and you start to realize how high the ladder goes. Right? And that gave me I think a sort of warped perspective on life. And Todd's perspective was warped in a different way. And by sort of, not like the three of us, by any stretch of the imagination, now encompass an enormous swath of life experience. JAMON: No. KEN: We're all white dudes for one thing. Right? JAMON: Yes. KEN: But nevertheless, it gives us sort of perspective on things that helps. It blunts some of the fear. JAMON: Mm-hmm (affirmative)- KEN: To have that breadth of perspective. TODD: I'd like to ask Ken, because your family culture wasn't business-oriented, and as you just mentioned, almost a little bit looked down upon business people, I guess for the crassness of it all. KEN: It wasn't overt, but it was definitely outside of our purview. TODD: And definitely your friends from Harvard who weren't in business school or that kind of thing ... do you, like for me. It's easy for me. The bar was so low. I surpassed almost everyone I grew up with long ago. JAMON: Yeah. Similar. TODD: I don't have to prove anything to anyone. KEN: Well, so at this point I don't care very much. At this point, I'm doing my thing and that's that. However, I will point out there is something very interesting about Silicon Valley. Which is that Silicon Valley is a business culture that was grown by people kind of like me- JAMON: Yeah. KEN: -from the professional and scientific culture. JAMON: That's true. KEN: And as a result, that is where, I think, I'm not a sociologist. I haven't studied this or anything, but my theory is that that's where that sort of disdain for lifestyle businesses comes from. I think it's seen as sort of a grind. Where you're getting paid for the brilliance of your idea, you're just getting paid for hard work. JAMON: Yeah, I think that this idea of a lifestyle business, which I don't have any negative connotation whatsoever. In my world, a lifestyle business sounds like a luxury. KEN: Luxury. TODD: Luxury. JAMON: Okay, we're gonna have to link to that YouTube video. TODD: Yes. JAMON: But some Monty Python there. But I think that's actually something that was really, really helpful was when we merged was the idea that we can design this business to be lower stress. That doesn't mean we take our eye off the ball, which we kinda did for a little while there. That doesn't mean that we don't work hard, cause we do when the situation demands it, but we can design the type of business where the general day to day things are not drudgery. They are things that we enjoy doing. That we're good at, and that we can contribute to the success of the business. And I think that that's something that's actually overlooked a little bit when you're owning a business that you do have the ability to change things. You have the ability to enact change. It may be painful. It may be hard. It might be expensive, but you can look at something and say, "You know what, this isn't fitting for me, and I'm gonna change it." Whether it's cutting off a client that's being too stressful. Whether it's hiring someone to do something that you're not good at. All of those things are things that you can do. My sister started a small WordPress website company. So she's building WordPress websites. And she asked me for a lot of advice along the way, because she knew I'd kind of- TODD: Is this Meredith, Jamon? JAMON: Yeah. That's right that's Meredith. And one of the things I told her was that you want to stay with your kids. You want to be at home. You want to build this business that does not interrupt those things, so make those very core priorities. When you make decisions, they should be based on whether they enhance that or take away from that. It kind of gave her permission to look at things through that lens. That you don't have to necessarily measure it on dollars and cents or even things like customer satisfaction. That may be a goal and you don't want to let people down, but ultimately you don't want to let your family down. And that's something that I think is really important. So for her, you know her husband's an engineer, a mechanical engineer. He makes good money. It's not something where they have to have the business, but she wanted something that challenged her while she was also able to be at home, and I think it's done that. TODD: And the people she worked with on her team are similar, correct? JAMON: Yeah, that's right. So she not only provided a business that works for her, but also for the people on her team. So she actually has people that do code. That do design. That do content. And in many cases they are people who stay at home with their kids. And that's kind of a cool concept that there could be a business that enables that. TODD: I think that super important to mention the reason why, because people think that their business has to be like they see on TV or they read about it in a magazine or a book or whatever, and it doesn't. What principles you base your business on is up to you, and then your job is to figure out a way to make that happen. I think it's awesome that she wanted to help herself and her team who want a particular lifestyle and still be able to have this business, and she's doing it, and that's wonderful. KEN: Yeah, and I think it's worth saying on the list of reasons to start a business, getting rich should probably not be your number one. If getting rich is your number one reason, well I mean that's fine, and depending on your personality, it at least has that as a possibility. JAMON: Sure. KEN: Whereas most jobs done. At least not on any sort of short time frame. The number one reason to do it is 'cause you want more control over your life. And that's why we did it. So the first year that I took off, when we were still trying to build an ap and we hadn't done the consulting yet, my daughter was two, and to save money we took less daycare. I had to still have some, 'cause we both work, but did less daycare. So I spent time with her. I cooked for the family. I found all these ways to save money, and I was sort of part-time house husband while this was going on, and even if the rest of this fails, right? Even if we crash and burn, the chance to have that year and do that will be with me the rest of my life. So, part of our mission here at Infinite Red, and something we've always agreed on is that we don't just want a successful business. We have to do that in order to make the rest of this work. And it's a perfectly good goal in itself, but that we also want to be an example of how work can work. Right? Not that there aren't others, but this is us. This is what we think work should be like. Not that it's never intense. Not that it's never hard. Not that it's some sort of walk in the park. It is not. But that it can co-exist with the rest of your life in a much more harmonious way than has been the model for 20th century corporate whatever. TODD: Yeah, there are other ways to run a business, all of them are wrong. CHRIS: Ken do you think that when we ... that struggle occurs when we move away from those principles and values and what's important to us as business owners or whatever that label would be? So like, when you move away from maybe wanting to spend time with your family or building a company where it fuels the lives of your employees. You know, do you think that fear and intention is magnified if you move away from those things? KEN: What do you mean by move away from those things? CHRIS: So that they're no longer a priority. Maybe you're making decisions that go against those values. KEN: That is definitely a source of stress. And the fact of the matter is, we are still a business. We still have to operate in the same environment that every other business does. And we have to compete against businesses that don't operate the way we do. JAMON: Right. KEN: And to whatever extent our values create, like I said, put us at a disadvantage, and I think sometimes in the short term that is true. We sometimes have to make hard choices in order to survive and work another day. And I think there's probably kind of a core, not exactly explicitly articulated, there's some core that we won't push past, but when we have to hopefully temporarily do things that are different from our stated values. Yeah, that's rough. Absolutely rough. JAMON: Yeah. KEN: The trick is to kind of figure out ... this is why it's so important to figure out what your real values are. Right? And we've had to sort of narrow it down in certain places, because if you have this long list of things that you claim to care about, but that's not actually true. Right? Then, when it really comes down to it, there are some things that are more core than others. If you die on the hill of one of the non-core ones, and it causes you to fail, that is an unacceptable outcome. And so, figuring out which hills you're really willing to die on and which hills you're not willing to die on is super important and there's not really a shortcut. It's something that you figure out as you go along. TODD: If you're getting chased by zombies through a forest and the zombies are starting to catch up to you, sometimes you have to give grandma a cookie and push her down the hill. That's all I'm saying. It sucks. It's against your principles, but grandma's lived a good life, and she loves those cookies. Fact. JAMON: I don't even know how to follow up on that one, but one of the things I was asked early on when I started my company was, what are your core principles and I kind of fumbled through an answer, and I don't even remember what it was at the time. But I actually think it was probably not reasonable for me to even know what those were at the time other than personal values, but over time, taking lumps here and there and bruises, and the stress and anxiety of various situations, it's made it very clear what is really important. At the time I was young, I was idealistic. I didn't really understand what could go wrong. What mattered. What didn't. But I think that all of those stresses and fears eventually taught me a lot of things and so in a lot of ways, even though they kind of sucked at the time, they were necessary to get me to who I am today. You know, I don't want to go back and relive them, but I wouldn't trade them away. TODD: Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Well that was super interesting to me. I knew some of that. I learned some new stuff which is always fun, and I hope it has some value to the listeners for sure. You know, our experience. At least it's hopefully an interesting story if nothing more. JAMON: Absolutely.

Activity + Non-Activity + Time = Rhythm. That is the equation of life. We may think, "A little bit of work and a little bit of vacation and maybe a little time with God = A life that flourishes." Right? Not quite. In this message, Pastor Bryan talks through our time and the timing of God and how God uses distinct moments to transform our priorities. 

Patrick:            They want hang out, Brian [inaudible 00:00:05].Patrick:            They want hang out, Brian [inaudible 00:00:05]. Kat:                Well, they're gonna have to wait til we're done. Patrick:            That's what I told them. Kat:                Oh. We're already - Patrick:            Oh, shit we're already on. Kat:                Yeah, I just noticed.  Patrick:            I think I have to duck down now. Kat:                Yeah, do you want ... how did that happen? What have we changed? Patrick:            I think this thing dropped down just a hair. Kat:                You think? Hang on. Yeah, we're going to deliberately do this live stream faceless. Just, you know, for reasons of privacy. Patrick:            Hi. For reasons of anonymity. Kat:                Yeah. We want to stay anonymous.  Patrick:            Hip hop anonymous? Kat:                Hip hop anonymous? How did that drop down? I don't know how that happened. Patrick:            I need to get some water, too. Agua. Kat:                Share this one. I made a fresh one. Patrick:            Not a big deal, because I'm running on fumes and that's - Kat:                I feel like this is not right. What, okay, we've had this system down all morning. How's this system suddenly fucked with? Is that better? Patrick:            Yeah, that's better. Kat:                It's still off-center. What's going on? Hi everybody. Patrick:            What up, Gary? Kat:                It's okay, cause this is all part of the show. Patrick:            It's part of the show. Kat:                Ooh, I was sitting somewhere different before. I'm so confused now. Patrick:            Let me get up and scoot this thing out just a hair. Here you go. Kat:                All right the problem is that we've had the realisation that we look fantastic when we're positioned in front of this picture. And so now, okay, I don't know what I'm doing. Patrick:            I think you're going to have scoot over just a little bit to the left. Kat:                This way? Patrick:            Yeah. Kat:                Ah. All right, we sorted it out. Patrick:            There we go, all right, go. Kat:                It was a team effort. Well, we realised earlier today that we look fantastic when  we're sitting in front of this photo. Patrick:            Gonna leave me hanging like that? Okay, team effort Boom. There we go. Kat:                Sorry, I didn't notice it. I was so focused on the video. Patrick:            It was beyond my vision. Kat:                And so now we're sitting like very precariously on the back of the couch, and we've now done four live streams so far today between us. Plus, written a blog- Patrick:            Just getting started. Kat:                Journaled first. Our success routine today has been fucking phenomenal. Right? Patrick:            And the flow. Every time we hang out it's always been some serious flow that's going on. Kat:                That's how it goes. We did our journaling, then we blogged, took some Insta stories. If you want to see the worse ever Australian accent in history of time, go and watch my Instagram stories. You're going to see - Patrick:            Some would say the best. Kat:                Who are they? I'm leery. Patrick:            They're there, they're there, there are people.  Kat:                And then we both did our separate blogs. Go read Patrick's blog on his page, I like it a lot. It's on letting life be easy, in all areas. Everything should get to be easy, not hard. I did my blog, then we went upstairs to the gym. Oh my god you should see up there, it's fucking amazing. We're going to go hang by the pool later after this. Patrick:            Yep. I really want to do. Kat:                Then we come back here, we're in fucking flow zone. We've done four live streams today between us. We just did - Patrick:            We've been going hard. Kat:                ... We just did a bad ass as fuck 40 minute live stream into Patrick's private group. If you happen to be a man, which I know there's not many of them in this group, but there are some. You got to go connect with him and get into his group. There's no women allowed in there, but yet I was a guest speaker. Honoured. I'm still not allowed in the group.  Patrick:            No, no. Kat:                I'm allowed to present to the group, but I'm not allowed to be in the group. No, I'm sorry Alexa, we didn't take time out to talk about you last time. Patrick:            There is rules. Kat:                Does he know who I am now? I'm sorry, nope, you don't really know who Alexer is do you?  Patrick:            Alexer? No, I know who Alexa is, not Alexer. Kat:                I told you briefly about Alexa's group, the Kaleidoscope, right?  Patrick:            Yep. Kat:                I told you about that last night. But we didn't go into detail though.  Patrick:            The Kaleidoscope? Kat:                Yeah. Patrick:            No, what's that about. Kat:                Well, I just told she has an amazing group, The Kaleidoscope, where we talk about all things. Sex and love and open relationships and, well, all sorts of combinations of relationships, or whatever people are obviously actually into.  Kat:                I met Alexa ... I'm going to tell this story now, because it's actually very relevant to our live stream and to how we're even ending up on this couch during this live stream. All right, let's position ourselves for the story. Alrighty. So we're just high on life, [inaudible 00:04:02], we don't need any alcohol. Patrick:            I just snorted up a big ol' line of life. Kat:                Yes, it's true. We've had an impressive amount of caffeine though , I must say.  Patrick:            Oh yeah.  Kat:                And almonds and chocolate. Patrick:            But that's healthy. Kat:                Of course. And brown sugar amino acids. Patrick:            And nuts. Not only that, I have nuts. Kat:                And the freaking hustle flow life, we've been content creating like a pair of mother fuckers. We're just in the content vibe. We're on content lock down right now.  Kat:                There's a man on this live stream, sorry Pete, to just draw attention to you. But the reason is, you've got to Patrick's group Entrepreneurs Players Club. So far you're the only person that potentially qualifies to be in the group.  Patrick:            Potentially a member. Kat:                Potentially, because he has - Patrick:            There's rules. Kat:                Well, the rules are, you've got to be, think like a person for true success.  Patrick:            You do. Kat:                But you should go join his group and watch the bad ass live stream we just dropped in there.  Patrick:            If you're from here, you're a bad mother fucker, so yeah, you should go there. Kat:                He's definitely going to be in your group. He'll be a perfect person to be in there. Patrick:            No trolls, Brandon. I know you'll eventually be on here and watching this. Kat:                [You know my story by now 00:05:05]. Pass me that drink. Kat:                Okay, so let's ... This is going to be a super cool live stream, you know that, about how ... although there's too many elements to how this came about. But I'm going to tell the Alexa story because it's very relevant and because weirdly enough, you don't know it. Probably you should know this story. Kat:                So Alexa I met in person, maybe two years ago ... It would have been not too long after we met, actually. I think it was like a month or two after we met. In fact, I think it was one of the same trips where I first came and stayed with you at your old apartment. So end of 2016, I think it was on the exact same trip that I met Alexa in person at a party in the Hollywood Hills, at [Reagan's 00:05:39] house, actually. Kat:                Alexa walked into the room and I was just, who is this woman? Because she had that presence, you know when a woman's really owning who she is and she truly doesn't give a fuck and she's so grounded in who she is. It was an intimidating ... Okay, but I don't feel that way, thank you though. That was awesome. It felt slightly intimidating to me, I was like holy shit, this woman is amazing and I'm fascinated by her and a little scared for some reason, because she's so ... just this incredible energy. Kat:                Anyway it was a big party, but the party ended and Alexa was one of three or four people who ended up hanging out well into the hours. We were all sitting around my left over Whole Foods Salmon and kale salad at 2:00 A.M. in the morning just having a conversation. I connected with Alexa on Facebook and then she started to write these pieces about basically love and sex. There's her Facebook group, you definitely want to part of that. Actually be in Alexa's group, I think you would enjoy it a lot. She started to write these blog posts that were 2000 word posts. Firstly, I'm like, wow, somebody else is doing what I do. Then when I read her stuff, I was, holy shit, this woman is freaking messaging from the heart. But she was writing about sex, really full on stuff that people don't go around saying on Facebook firstly, except Alexa does. I think it was a photo of her in her lingerie in the bathtub, the whole thing was just fascinating. Patrick:            Fifty shades of Grey stuff. Kat:                They were more like really raw stories about, I guess her stories and journey and lessons that she'd had to learn about herself and about life, through relationships and sex. Just starting to recognise that there's something inside of me that feels like I don't want to do it the normal way. Then playing around with that stuff. She had a call to action at the end. I think it was one of her first calls to action that she did for this business. I reached out and I became a private client straight away. It only a few months after I left my marriage. I was really in a place where I actually was, I don't know what dating even means. I don't know how to date, I don't what that is. What do you do on a date? I'd been in a long term relationships for 15 years.  Kat:                I felt like I definitely wasn't happy in my marriage, also the whole way through both of my marriages, I always kind of felt like I don't really think I agree with this monogamy thing. But as you're growing up, especially the Christian upbringing, you kind of push those thoughts aside. I remember one time saying to my first husband, actually I read an article about couples who live separately, but they still have commitment to each other, but they just do life separately and then they come together when they want to. I was, "That's fucking awesome, that's how it should be." I said it to him and he was pretty shitty at me about it. He was kind of hurt or offended or whatever. So I was, "Huh, I think it sounds like a good idea.", right?  Kat:                that was years ago. Even all the way through my second marriage, it wasn't I was going out and looking at other guys. It was more just that on a fundamental level, I was not really sure if this is what I want, if this agrees with me. Yeah, so the thoughts were there. Then coming to Alexa's phone, and I can still remember our first coaching call together. She was like, "Well, what do you want? What do you actually want from a relationship or from sex as well." I was kind of like ... it was like I never thought about that before. It was kind of revolutionary to me that you could think about what you want and make it go. Because, I guess, assumed that you just get what you get, right? Which is so funny, I know, considering what I teach and preach in business. But I just hadn't connected the dots.  Kat:                Alexa had me do, one of the first things she had me do, I think we did it live together of our first Skype call ... Actually, I should give this to you, I can't believe I haven't given this to you, BDSM test. So I go to BDSM test, which is a free online test, and you figure out your sexual preferences, and it gives you a cool little survey that tells you what you're into. So it came up, I think, 98% non-monogamous came back on my results.  Patrick:            98%.  Kat:                98% ... My desire is that 98% of me believes in non-monogamy. It was one of my highest rankings, I think it was in my top three. The other one was to do with bondage. Anyway, I noticed some other stuff in there, and there's some really weird stuff on that questionnaire. It's just some stuff - Patrick:            Do you like being tied up? Do you like - Kat:                It was more like are you into ponies and stuff like that on the test. Patrick:            Whoa.  Kat:                It had everything that - Patrick:            A little pony play? Kat:                But I got identified as a rope bunny, which means I want to be tied up and - Patrick:            You said rope bunny? Kat:                That's what it's called, a rope bunny. Right, I can't believe I've never sent you this test. We'll do the test. Patrick:            Mine would blow up, it'd be all fucked up.  Kat:                That's the point, right? The point is to own who you are. So Alexa taught me to own who I am. She also taught me to own what I wanted and what I desired, even if it felt kind of crazy or out there, right? So that, we coached for some period of time, but obviously I got into her Facebook group, and in The Kaleidoscope, it's just a normal everyday conversation for me now. That everyday I'm talking about open relationships or different kinds of relationships, monogamous, non-monogamous, whatever people are into. All different sort of sex and love stuff as well. I guess the point of that is before we kind of go into what we're going to talk about, which we have no idea what it is. Patrick:            We don't even. Kat:                we haven't planned it. Patrick:            Nothing. Kat:                Of course not.  Kat:                The point of that story is, well this woman really has impacted me a lot. Because she taught me I have permission to have what I want. I don't have to fit into the conventional norms in the relationship area. But also taught me something which took me longer to figure out. Even though she taught me from the start, but it took me until pretty recently to figure out, which is to actually be okay with owning all that I am with the men in my life, right? And to say what I actually think, speak what's on my mind, speak my truth and be unattached to the outcome of it. Which is exactly what I do in business so I kind of figured some of this stuff out. Then Alexa's voice in my head from when we worked together. And also to totally be open about having that conversation with someone in your life and finding out what they actually want and desire. Kat:                I think that typically in a relationship of any kind, whether it's marriage or it's long term boy-friend girl-friend, or it's whatever it is that you can't really figure out or put a name on. Either way, mostly people aren't talking about it, right? We've been hanging out, hanging out, we've been hanging out in a pretty big way for 18 months, ish, I think. Patrick:            Whoa. Kat:                And we never talked about this until Sunday last week. Which is roughly how this ended up happening. There's a lot I can say here, but you can say something now. Patrick:            Yeah. Shit, you're very ... I guess whoever you talked to, or whatever, must have unstuck some stuff. But you said what's on your mind. If you don't tell people what's on your mind, you don't really know, kind of like you're just going through it. That's just anything with sales, I think, or communication in general. If you don't put it out there and you don't let people know what exactly what's on your mind and exactly what you're looking for, then you won't know. You're just going to kind of just go through the motions and you don't know where you're going to end up. Kat:                Well you're kind of living in fear and you're living in doubt and uncertainty. You're not giving yourself permission to be you. Also if you don't ask for what you want, you're not going to get it, that's for sure. If you do ask for what you want, then at least you don't know what's going to happen, but you open up a conversation, and, of course, you can find what the other person wants as well, right. Which sounds revolutionary fucking idea. Oh my god, imagine asking somebody what they actually want. Kat:                Well maybe there's people out there who are naturally doing this, but for me, it's been this kind of ... Like navigating relationships and dating since becoming single, for the first maybe six month period, I just felt like I had no fucking clue what I was doing. I was kind of all over the place. Then I noticed I was definitely in a fear mentality. I was worrying about how to be engaging. It's like going on a live stream and worrying about how to be engaging. I was over thinking every fucking thing. Like for sure, I sent you so many messages where I probably spent two ... I can remember a message that I literally spent two weeks thinking about and Alexa coached me on the actual message. Actually what it comes down to, was I was scared to just say what I was thinking or feeling. Kat:                I was doing this in multiple dating situations at the same time. But, as you know, you've been the most important man that I've connected with since becoming single. You've been the only one that's there pretty much the whole way through. And the relationship we have is different because it's a soul level thing, and there's a flow and a soul connection.  Kat:                So I've had dating stuff where I probably wouldn't ... I don't know, it's not got to a point where it's ... this sounds bad, but it's not got to a point to where I care enough to actually go deep into that conversation. But then how we've been, it's got to a point where I do want to have a conversation about this, but I didn't know how to do that. Then I just started saying what I think, which honestly, I find a terrifying thing. And I told him the whole way through, I can't believe I'm saying this. I feel crazy and I feel like this is terrifying, but I'm going to say it anyway. Because I've learned that in business, if I say what I'm thinking and what I'm feeling, I can't screw it up. Because I know and truly believe that, if I say what I want and what I'm thinking, and then if that would completely shut down what we had, then that's how it was meant to be. I just believed that. But if I'm not going to be fully myself, then nothing actually really real anyway. It's not built on the right foundation.  Kat:                So how this live stream came about, only like a week ago, not even a week ago, Patrick said to me "He's quite certain that what I want from a relationship is different from what he want's." And I said, "I'm quite certain we've never talked about that." So maybe we'll talk about it and we jumped on the phone and just kind of spoke about this different way of doing dating or doing relationships where it is unconventional. Where actually both of us realised, and we didn't know this about each other, that we were on the same page as far as not wanting monogamy and just kind of, I guess, still figuring it out. Kat:                I don't know exactly what I really want over the time. I know that right now I definitely don't want monogamy, but I do want to know that I've ... with us, we've got a deep connection that nobody could kind of replace or erase. But it doesn't mean that I want to be tied off from other opportunities. I mean we're not even in the same country most of the time anyhow. But even despite that right? Then also when I think about him sleeping with other women, I'm like that doesn't remotely bother me at all. I'd probably get triggered as fuck if I saw you live streaming all the time with other women. I'd be like what the fuck. Patrick:            That's our thing.  Kat:                So for me it's - Patrick:            I don't of anybody that I can ... I don't know if any ... Of course I have other women in my life, and I just, [I Am 00:16:24] is a soul connection with Kat and I don't know if anything that ... I don't really have the same conversations that I have with you. That's nice, you know there are people out there, that I'm sure that I can have a deep conversation with and things. But typically speaking - Kat:                And fun. Patrick:            Yeah, it's just having fun and all that. It's a good time and as a man that's just what you do. But from my - Kat:                But it's not just as a man, that's the whole point. Because that's what I want as well, right?  Patrick:            Exactly, yeah, yeah.  Kat:                And particularly by the way, driven ambitious women like me, typically have an insanely high desire for all things in life, including sex. It's definitely not just a man thing.  Patrick:            I don't get ... I read your posts and everything like that, so I see your other stuff that you talk about as well and stuff like that. I don't have any kind of any bad feelings or anything about any of that stuff. I read, actually I get ... I'm happy that you're experiencing life, and that that's what you enjoy doing, I'm happy. When you sent me the messages when we first kind of talked about all this stuff - Kat:                When we started having these open conversations, which was like December and just started laying stuff out.  Patrick:            Yeah. I didn't really mind it at all. You know, like if you know that guys stand for ... We're not scared of anything like that, it actually helped me out as far as to figure out kind of what I'm really looking for. As far as a deeper connection goes. Because typically it's just been one of those things where I've been going through the motions. Obviously it's hard to find people on my level mentally thinking. Kat:                Same.  Patrick:            To have a great conversation where we just sit there and we're back and forth most of the time. Kat:                We're just total flow when we're ... We met through Brian Schuman, this is easy to figure out, it's not a secret. Brian's best friend, Patrick, that's how I met him, right? It was a hook up, right? We slept together and the next day I left Dallas and I was like, "oh cool, you know, awesome, and I'm probably never going to speak to that guy again." Then somehow we got to messaging, and we met up again a month later. I remember that second time, I was like, "Oh cool, this is going to be fun. This guy is going to drive out from Dallas to Austin to see me. That's kind of cool, it's a decent trip." And I was just expecting to have a fun time. Kat:                Then it was when we were speaking, we were in the bar that day, in the afternoon, having margaritas and you were talking about your purpose and your wire. I can remember sitting there and just being, "Oh, fuck, I thought this guy was ..." whatever that I categorised you as, at least in my head. Now I'm like, "Oh." And I remember thinking I feel like I could really develop feeling for this person. That's there's something there where it's going to be ... I've not heard anybody else speak like that, to this day, it's like I can't have this conversation with any other man in my life, past or present. It's just not been there before where it's total flow. How many other times when you're hanging out, and actually we haven't seen each other since October, and i just got back here yesterday. Today we've largely done content generally all day long. I'm like, "Well this is exactly what I write in my journal. That I want an amazing man in my life."  Kat:                But specifically I have written that I want kind of one key guy that's the main guy that I care about and that I have a deeper connection with and that it's different and it is that soul connection. I've written I want to do funny live streams together and I want to tear shit up on the internet. I want to do all the things that flow for me. That's what we have and it can't be replaced. When I'm not here or we don't speak all the time or whatever, I think about you being with other women, I'm like, whatever, because it doesn't ... Nothing can replace what we have, oh my god, it's not possible, it's just not possible. Because it's something that's not about us getting along or spending time together and building on the relationship because we spent time together. It's because it's fundamental stuff there that's just kind of an unbreakable bond.  Patrick:            Yeah, I told you, when you told me I was something, "Oh man." Now, it's fucked up because I'm thinking, and I've told you, yeah this kind of fucks things up or whatever, but I'm thinking, well I don't really want you to go. I don't to lose our relationship that we have. This is more than enough, I like it, and I don't want anything to mess it up. Even thinking about just you being in other relationships, I don't ... That's not what I'm concerned about. I'm concerned about that we maintain our connection that we have as it is.  Kat:                Exactly.  Patrick:            To me it's just ... We already covered some things as far as talking more and things like that. But obviously we're both super fucking busy. Kat:                Yeah, but it's also we had boundaries up or walls up that have now kind of come down a lot. Even just unloading this last one week. Because literally Saturday last week, he messaged me saying we're not going to see each anymore, at all, right? Patrick:            Yeah.  Kat:                So, how did that work out. Really, because we hadn't communicated about it and you had basically an assumption or expectation that what I wanted was a white wedding and a conventional relationship, I think. You were kind of that's not what I want so we have to stop. "This has to stop because it's just going to end up fucked up. I'm not going to be able to give you what you want or whatever. I know that what you want from a relationship is different." I was coming pretty hard. I was saying shit that you don't just go around saying to people. It was just, "I'm just going to tell you exactly what I think." I'm writing him fucking 4000 word essays on a Facebook message.  Kat:                You think my blogs are long, you should see the stuff he has to read. I'm just, right, this is what I think, these are all my thoughts, this is all the crazy shit inside my head that I definitely probably shouldn't tell you, but I'm going to tell you anyway. It was pretty full on. The whole way through I was, I think it's pretty amazing that you didn't totally be, holy shit, I've got to get away from this chick, this is crazy. That didn't happen, instead ... Well we were communicating, actually, in a pretty good way. But it was kind of communicating with a guard up and just an assumption of what the other person thought or wanted. Instead of just talking about it. Kat:                It sounds so silly, but for me, I don't know about you, but for me, it literally never occurred to me. I knew that ... I talk about this everyday with Alexa and everyone in the group that I don't want monogamy, but it never ever occurred to me that you would feel that way. I just never thought about it, or I never asked, right? How silly is it, right? You can be spending time in developing - Patrick:            Communication breaking down or whatever. [crosstalk 00:22:41] Kat:                We just never thought about it. But I think it's also is where we started was super casual and it was kind of just hooking up and then it quickly felt like, well, there's more to it than that. But then for me at least, I was, this is kind of scary. I'm not going to go around saying what I actually think. Because that would be embarrassing and you feel to vulnerable, right? And you don't feel safe.  Kat:                How I got to a point where I started saying everything I think. Massive essay length manner for several months now, was I just decided, well hang on, if I just started saying what I actually think and what I'm feeling and what I want, and it results in us completely breaking apart, then that would be what was meant to happen. Because ultimately why would I want to build on something with somebody where I can't just fully be myself. And even, this kind of made me feel like that, then I was really happy. Kat:                Like the other day we where on the phone, and you'd said you'd read that blog that I wrote about the guy that I met in Santa Monica last week. I put that blog here in the daily ass kicker group. I post this shit, I know he's in this group, I know he read all my content. I do think about that when I post stuff about other guys. I always feel like maybe I won't say that because I feel like I've go to guard myself. The reason I post it anyways, because I'm that's the message that's coming me to post, so I'm not going to act out of fear. It would be a fear energy if I didn't post that blog. I'm going to post the blog, I know he's going to read it. We normally wouldn't talk about it. Then we mentioned the other night on the phone and you were, "I read that blog." I was kind of ... then you were, "And I just felt really happy for you." That's perfect, because our connection is not just sex, anyway, how is that a thing. Patrick:            Yeah. I like to see that you were experiencing life. That's what I try to do when I go out. To find that something like that passion and everything that you might just run into in the moment. Because that's what we're supposed to do.  Kat:                Right, you should get to respond to the moment. Patrick:            You should, and you should milk the ecstasy of the moment. You should get whatever you can out of the moment that's meant for you to experience. That's totally yours to experience, that's nobody can take that away from you. You should do what life or whatever the universe is providing for you at that moment. Kat:                You get to have it all, you do. Alexa says, "A connection doesn't mean wedding bells." Of course not, right? That's if people want to get married, they can get married. But I know for sure, both times when I got married, the main driving force was I felt like then I'm kind of safe, or I've accomplished what I'm supposed to accomplish. I didn't get married because my desire is to marry this person. It was this person might potentially be the right person and I should get married because  otherwise ... The first one, honestly, was because I felt guilty about having sex outside of marriage. Just my conditioning and my upbringing, that's the main reason I got married.  Kat:                Then the second time was fear. It was feeling like maybe I won't ever find someone else who loves me. Maybe, this is how it should have to be. I was 27 and I'm going to have to think about kids. There was so much fucked up shit that went into that. There was love there as well, I'm not saying that. But I didn't get married because I was like, I've got to get married, my soul, what would fulfil it? Marriage, my soul is to get married, no that is not something remotely that connects to soul. It was more an idea or concept. I'm not saying ... I'm not anti-marriage for people who want to get married. But yeah, yes, you're only on the planet for a very short time.  Kat:                I mentioned this to friends at dinner in New York the other night about this non-monogamous concept. Actually one of my friends who's there, he married, but they've been non-monogamous in their relationship the whole time. He's in his 40's now. He was, Well, the main thing, and Alexa maybe you can comment on this, but the main thing is if you're going to be in any kind of non-monogamous relationship, communication and honesty, right? Just being honest about what you actually both want. I think that's just the same as any other thing in life. Business stuff, client stuff, all of it. If you're not going to just say what you want, well you're not going to freaking get it. But also you're going to live in fear and uncertainty.  Patrick:            Also, you're talking different styles and everything, it's a totally different set up. What we have is a totally different set up than anybody that most people would have. Just like - Kat:                Right. You can't put a label on it. Patrick:            No, it's just like a ... This to me is like ... That's why I was thinking how I define a relationship is totally different than what I was thinking that you had. So we had that break down.  Kat:                Yeah, literally on Monday or Sunday last week. Patrick:            Yeah. Kat:                I just thought it was the funniest thing ever.  Patrick:            I'm not - Kat:                You're like, "I'm very certain that you want different things." I'm like, "I'm very certain that we've never talked about it." Patrick:            It's that point when I saw that ... What I'm thinking is I have the best thing going. [inaudible 00:27:24]. I'm like, cool, that's great, what we have. I'm thinking you're thinking on the same page. You're thinking the same page as we see each other occasionally, you come into town, hang out and just have a great time. Then it's back to what we do. So that was, we just connect over we talk on the internet and everything. It was - Kat:                What did I miss? We're not going to redo the whole conversation for you. You can watch the - Patrick:            You've got to back up. Kat:                But I had started a lot of stuff indicating I wanted more, I felt like there should be more. And I was getting kind of ... It was like a slight scary vibe on my behalf, right? Then after, it [inaudible 00:28:05] there for a while like we were just completely not even hang out anymore at all. Then I started really tuning into myself. What do I actually want here, what am I trying to get? What am I actually asking for if I be honest with myself? Then I realised what I want is I want to feel more connection and communication. So that's what we spoke about. That's really what I want. I just want to ... I guess what I also wanted was, I kind of had that wall up for the first year or whatever, where I was "Am I crazy, am I making up how deep this connection is." And I thought I was just making it up and I wanted that validation. Patrick:            I thought, what I was thinking this is mother fucking Kat, I'm not going to sit there and take up all her time on the damn message all day. I was ... in the message room. Kat:                I'm like, "Why doesn't he message me more often, why don't we communicate?" I would be, "I don't think he even likes me." Then we'd hang out together, because I'd come to America. I would be, "There's no fucking way I'm going to Texas." Somehow I'd always end up in Texas, right? It was kind of this funny routine that I had. Every time that I come here where I would tell myself I'm not going. I'm going to stop whatever this thing is because I'm just making it up. It's probably just a hook up for him, that's what I was thinking in my head. And I think we have this deep soul connection, but maybe it's not real, because ... the guards were up, we weren't talking about it. I was scared at the even idea of talking about it. If you would have told me six months ago that I'd be doing this live stream, I would doing this live stream, I'd be "That's impossible, there's no fucking way."  Kat:                I thought I had to maintain, not professional, but it's like when you're trying to be professional in business. I was trying to play it cool, but it just resulted in me kind being obsessive and thinking about it all the time in my head. Then we'd come together and just have this flow connection that is undeniable. Then I'd leave or we'd go our separate ways. Then we wouldn't really talk, at all. I would be just driving myself crazy. And honestly every other guy I've dated, well if I do have a good time, I always have a good time in that moment. It's a different thing though, right? It's a different kind of feeling. That's awesome and I love and appreciate it, but then I would still always be thinking about our connection. Kat:                Then I spent probably all of last year going around in circles in my head going, "Is this a real connection, this soul connection that I fell, or am I just, I don't know, am I trying to latch onto something here? Am I trying to invent it into something?" Then though there'd be, obviously some of the things you said as well, where I'm, "I'm fucking right, I know that it's a real connection." And I know that, because I feel that anyhow. Kat:                Then kind of, for me, all these conversations we'd been having for now, months, since before Christmas, that was, I got to a point like I said to you in the first massive epic letter. I got to a point where this is driving me crazy. It's hanging over me all the time. I just need to know. I wrote him this big letter and it was kind of blunt and it was very full on. And I said at the start, "Warning, this is going to be intense." And I was right. "I don't know what you feel, but this is what I feel." And kind of went through it all. Kat:                Then at the end, I said, "Well, I guess now you're going to think I'm crazy and we'll never speak again. Or maybe we talk about it. Or you feel the same way or whatever. But at least I put it out there." And it kind of started this process which took, I guess a few months for us to really communicate openly with each other. But as far as what I wanted, what I figured out after we spoke, or even before we spoke on the phone, about it last week, was I wanted to know that the connection was real. I wanted to know I wasn't making shit up inside my head. That was doing [inaudible 00:31:37] all year last year, because we didn't talk about it properly at all. And i wanted more connection and communication. I don't come to the U.S. more than every few months anyway at the moment.  Kat:                But even if I lived here, I wouldn't want to live together. I wouldn't want an exclusive relationship. I'd want if I lived in the U.S., I want probably to spend more time together, because I'm here. But it would be only ever when it flows and when it feels right. I don't a relationship of any kind where it feels like there's an obligation that you've got to spend time with each other. It should only be when it flows. Kat:                But yeah, the communication thing, the whole time I felt like you don't really want to talk to me. Then when we talked abut it, you're "Oh, I didn't want to bother you." I'm, "How did we not talk about this a long time ago." Patrick:            She says, "Why wouldn't you want monogamy? What happens if either of you meet someone you have a deeper connection with that does want monogamy" I would say that, I'm not going to have monogamy, period, like that. I might have, say girlfriends or whatever like that, that we do have a deep connection with. But they're going to deal with a relationship with Kat. They're going to be cool with what ... I'm going to be upfront and honest ... I'm always upfront and honest to women. I don't mind at all to tell them I have girlfriends, you know what I mean. I - Kat:                Multiple. Patrick:            Yeah, in my life. Either take it or leave it, that's fine. That doesn't matter to me, not one bit. Because that's just me being as honest as I possibly fucking can. The reactions, 99% of them are always ... some of them are pissed off about that, you know what I mean? "Oh my god, I can't believe it." Or say something like that. It's all good. Generally people come around, "Oh, okay, I get what you're saying. But this is kind of a pop on the the head." Kat:                It's a conditioning thing though. I don't know, it's hard for me to understand this, because most who I know are pretty non ... well they're either non-monogamous or they're very open to that. But I guess I hang around with an exceptional different kind of a woman. So I imagine, or I think that most women out there wouldn't emotionally maybe be able to cope with that. Or they feel that they can't, because they feel like they need their validation from the man. Whereas, I felt I definitely was seeking validation as well from a man, truthfully, after I became single. Then that's been a big part of my process of what I've worked through to where I got to a point where I was, "I get everything I need from me, inside of me." Patrick:            Right. Kat:                I'm not giving ... Well, I'm happy when I'm with him, and I'm having a great time. But that's not what provides me with my happiness. I'm not happy because I have Patrick in my life, or because I come here. That's not, "Oh, good, I some validation, or got an injection of happiness or whatever, or love." Or something like that. That's all kind of part of it, but I give all that stuff to me, I'm in love because I choose to be in love, even of myself. Then when I add love, romance, whatever it is on top of that, then that's purely coming from a place of, well because I desire it, and because it there and I can have it. But it's not completing me. I'm not being completed by somebody or something outside of me.  Kat:                So to me that feels really healthy, as far as that question. My answer to that question about what if you met somebody else, currently the way I feel is I can't imagine meeting somebody else who I would have this level of soul connection with. But I also know that it's possible, right? I'm not going to sit here and say that's not possible, anything is possible. That's how I feel right now. I feel that this is a very rare connection. Who else am I going to sit here with and do live streams all day. Also the conversations that we have all the time. Just kind of a deep understanding of each other and acceptance. So it feels like I can't imagine that happening. And I feel kind of cocky about the fact that I can't imagine you meeting another woman who you have this level of connection with. Patrick:            Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I'm pretty much a bad mother fucker, so you know, if meet a guy like [crosstalk 00:35:41]. Kat:                But I feel cocky about it the other way around. I'm like, as if you're going to be able to have that level of conversation with another woman. But then I also do understand that of course that could happen, right? I'm not holding on to it, I'm not attached to it. It is what it is right now.  Patrick:            Because you're going to be totally happy and in love with your life no matter what. Kat:                Exactly. Patrick:            You're in love with your life. Because you're in love with your life.  Kat:                And with my own self. Patrick:            Right.  Kat:                Right. So whatever shifts or grows over time, whatever it ends up being or not being, we'll be exactly perfect tomorrow. We might grow closer together or we might ultimately drift apart. But either I've got what I need inside of me, you've got what you need inside of you. We're not trying to get that from each other.  Patrick:            No. Kat:                So it just feels like, for me it feels like the best connection I've ever had. Patrick:            Like a roll over. Kat:                Because previously my serious relationship long term connections that I had, were not based on that foundation. So there was always fear, there was always worry of some kind and it was toxic or it was co-dependent, or it got into manipulation or abuse or whatever. I'm just not available for that anymore. Obviously coming through all that, you get to where you're like, "Oh my god." In my twenties or whatever age, the end goal was marriage and then I thought I'm safe. Then you get married, and you're not fucking safe, right? Patrick:            Right.  Kat:                Because you didn't build on the right foundation or you didn't understand these things and you were looking for something outside of yourself. Now I'm so safe, emotionally. With or without Patrick in my life. And I want him in my life and that's what we spoke about. We had to really hash it out. We were like, he was like, "We're going to stop talking. We're going to stop hanging out. Let's be friends, but not physical." I'm like, "Good luck with that." So that's not going to happen. But then we talked it out and it was this realisation of ... My god, I totally lost my train of thought. What was I going to say? Something about the safely thing. What was I just saying?  Patrick:            Gotta go back. Kat:                Oh, it was a good point as well.  Patrick:            Have to go back to one part you were thinking about then just ... Kat:                No, because then I left you those audios on Sunday and you kind of had been talking to me for a little bit. Then we talked a little bit, but you were, "No, can't work, it's not going to work." Then I left you audios. "At the end of the day what i really want is I just want you in my life. I don't want to lose you out of my life." Patrick:            No.  Kat:                "And I do want more communication. Right? Not from a neediness point of view, more because it's one of the things I value most in my life is our communication. So why would I not want that more?" Then once I said that, then came back to me and, "I don't want to lose you out of my life either." Then we had a massive phone call and hashed it out. Now basically here we are.  Kat:                That's pretty much the whole story. Patrick:            Here we are. Kat:                That's the whole story, you're caught up.  Patrick:            You're caught up now. You're brought up to speed everybody.  Kat:                We missed some comments. I don't know, what do you want to add to that. I'm going to look at the comments here. Patrick:            Well, I came out of a bad relationship back in 2014, I think it was. Huge, bad relationship where I was constantly trying to get so many things. I was trying to ... I based so much of my life around the relationship. I'm just the kind of guy that goes all in on everything thing that I do. And I thought that, hell I wasn't even trying to make that happen, but I did, and it ended up becoming something that I just went all in on and I shouldn't have. It ended up terrible because you can't really do that anyways in a relationship without ... It's better when there's a certain kind of chemistry that you have to have. Especially you guys know if the guy is needy as fuck that it's a very huge turn off, right? So it ended up things getting fucked up that way.  Patrick:            so anyways, things did get fucked up and I went on a rebound with another chick and I did the same exact thing. Went right back off into being needy again and got tore up again on that. So I was coming off a bad relationship and then finally just figured out, just work those things out in my head. So basically I was, I don't know where the fuck I'm trying to go with this, but I'm trying to come at y'all as the way the guy thinks. Sometimes you'll see this and as far as me putting all my chips in those bags, that's kind of like what lead me to totally pull myself out of that.  Patrick:            Actually that relationship, those two relationships are what kind of set me in pace to quit my job and start working towards something greater in my life. Because I just realised, yeah, this is where I'm trying to go with this. Then I realised life isn't meant to just fucking put all of your chips into a relationship. Kat:                And think it's going to save you. Patrick:            And think it's going to save you. And that goes for that job, or that goes for anything in your life. It's not meant for you to do that. It's meant for you to put all your ... hedge all your bets on your self. Kat:                Right, I was going to say that exact line. Patrick:            Yeah, cool. Just go all in on yourself and just totally go in on that and then the rest of that shit is going to come to you when you do that. It might not be what you were thinking, because that's certainly had in my mind when these other relationships was, maybe a wedding and all this stuff. I'm thinking that's what I was thinking, picket fence and all that stuff. And then it doesn't happen like that, but there's so much other stuff out there that comes along and it's just like, boom. It's exactly the way you should be living your life. Patrick:            The way I think about life is, I've got my theory about life and it's just different than what everybody thinks. It's not religious or anything like that. But basically, I kind of, this is just a philosophy that I have, that I live by. It's my own personal philosophy, this is how I look through the lens of the world. The lens of the world is this, that we have probably been here, already, before. Human beings have probably been on this planet before. And because we just happen to be in the best time living, and the best time possible, right? Just everything is so easy. Communication is so easy. We can talk into a camera and money will flow back to you. If you communicate, you will succeed. We live in the easiest time, the easiest time, the easiest time and we're right on the cusp of something like artificial intelligence coming around and being a supercomputer, super intelligence, it's almost here, but it's not quite.  Patrick:            So a lot of scientists believe that we're probably ... We've probably already been here before, and we probably just now we're jacked in because we can live forever. And we probably just jack in and live this life over and over again without the memory of actually being immortal. Because if you're immortal, right, you're going to live forever and it's going to get very boring, right? If you play the game over and over again on god mode, then you're going to get bored. So my personal philosophy is that we probably just jacked into this thing and we erase our memories, but we make it just hard enough to live, right? Just hard enough to where ... We put the hard stuff in there to go through and to make it to where we enjoy the better times.  Patrick:            So that's my personal philosophy about life and I think that it doesn't always end up where you're thinking. It's designed to switch you up and throw you off track. And you're designed to go through these hardships so when you find something great and the stuff really comes at you and surprises you, and you just ... and that way you can just enjoy this. And it's milking the ecstasy of every single moment, right. The people that come into your life. It just totally trips you up and it's all designed to where you are just having ... you are obtaining happiness, true happiness. Happiness is overcoming resistance. Kat:                It's also being in the moment and not being attached to the moment or to what comes after the moment, right?  Patrick:            Yeah. Kat:                Attachment is such a huge thing in relationships and in business and in life. Even all the stuff I just shared, and I just gave a very brief overview of it, obviously. But I was getting into pretty normal conditioned patterns of feeling a need for attachment or some kind of proof or something like that. It was such a great learning process for me, even way back.  Kat:                I'll give you an example, which I've told you this, but I don't know if you remember this. But in December after we first met, so over a year ago, the previous December, you said you were going to come to Austin that second time when I was in Austin. Then you didn't end up coming. You got a lot of work and stuff in business. I was kind shocked, because I knew already that we had this connection. And I was kind of pissed, because I was, "I'm here from Australia, and you can't come to Austin." I was kind of shitty. But I was really needy about, right. It's how I felt inside of myself. Kat:                So then the next morning, went to yoga, as I do, obviously. I went into the Bikram yoga class and I was, right, I set myself and intension, which is how I figure out a lot of stuff in my life. I thought by the end of this class, I'm going to clear this in my head and I'm going to understand it. I remember half way through that class, this was ages ago, and it was pretty early on in our connection anyhow. But I remember half way through the class being, holy shit, that's such a massive gift that you didn't come. Because it highlighted for me that I was looking for my self worth to be validated from you, from a man. I just acknowledged it and completely [inaudible 00:44:58] what it is. I was, "Why did I get so upset about that? Why was I so upset. It's not like we had any promises between us or anything like that."  Kat:                But I was just really upset. I had to acknowledge and I recognised it's all my own self worth shit. Which is totally fine, I'm compassionate about myself for that, because I'd been in a long term marriage that wasn't working and my self worth was shot to pieces in that area. So I was, "Wow, it's so good that you didn't come, because it gave me the opportunity to learn this lesson that I was looking for my self worth to be grounded to me by somebody else."  Kat:                That's not possible, when you want somebody else to give you self worth or happiness or even love, obviously then you're continuously saying I don't have that inside of me. Somebody else has got to provide that for me. Then I'll know I'm safe. Then I'll know I'm good enough. Then I'll know I'm worthy of love and all those sort of things.  Kat:                I ended up, of course, I turned it into a programme. I didn't talk about us. But I created a four week programme out of it, called - Patrick:            Where's my cut? Kat:                For real, I made like 50K on that straightway. I launched it that day. I came out of the yoga studio, I was, "I'm on fucking fire." I remember walking through the streets, I was live streaming. I'm like right, I'm going to teach you about manifestation, and that when you put something outside of you, and you put it up on a pedestal, and you say, "when I have that" a million dollars, cool car, person who says they love me, whatever it is. "When I have that, then I'm safe, then I'm good enough, then I'm successful, then I'm worthy." You put it on a pedestal like that, you will never get it. Because you're always saying that this is not available to me from the inside me.  Kat:                Even if in this situation, even if you have come along. Even if I had have him saying from day one, "Oh, I love you, and you're safe and I'll take care of you ..." or whatever. There would have always been fear there. Because I knew that, that's me attaching it to somebody else. And you can't do that. You can't control another person and why would you want to. So that was only one incident, there were many times along the way where I was driving myself crazy with my own stuff. It just helped me to process and grow and recognise all my patterns were I was, "Oh, my god, wow, I was looking for this."  Kat:                Even moments where i was, should I say this on a message?  Patrick:            Thank you.  Kat:                Should I say this on a message, should I send a text message saying  ... that time when I had to come to Dallas when Regan and were speaking, right? Patrick:            Yeah. Kat:                I honestly spent two weeks during my heading about whether or not I should even message you that I'm coming. And then I basically pestered Alexa about it. I made a script for this text message. For real. I was what do I say that I don't scare this guy off me. Now I'm like, I can't believe I would have been, what if I scare a guy off? Because whatever. What if I be myself and either way is fine. But I just wasn't at that point yet, so it's totally fine.  Kat:                But Alexa was, "You just ask yourself what you're actually feeling, then say that." I was, minds blown, I never thought of that idea before. Then I did. I'm, "Hey, I'm coming to Dallas, we should have a coffee." So carefully crafted, took me two weeks. But I was living from fear and I was living ... And then I ended up staying with you for like a week on that trip. So it worked out quite well. But the point is, I just let go of all that a while back now. And I've continued to let go of it, and I continued to understand it and continued to notice my patterns, right? Kat:                Even always, just never-endingly in every area of my life. But I think the biggest shift that I had in this area, and could have probably never had this shift this far without what we have. Is just to realise that, I'm not going to get anything and I don't want to desire anything from another person, right? Not a romantic person, not a client, not a friend, not my kids, nobody. I don't get that from anyone else. So even if we had have finished our journey already, it would have been nothing but massive growth from that experience over this past year or so. The universe has your back. Kat:                So Alexa asked a question that I'm sorry to say, we can't answer, because we've never spoke about that. Now are you going to be annoyed at me about that. So I'm going to get in trouble, but it's a good point. She says ... Can you hang on; she wanted us to say what are rules are sexually around physical safety, like when sleeping with multiple people? Actually we haven't discussed that, I'm sorry. That shouldn't, yeah [inaudible 00:49:18]. Patrick:            I don't know, rules, like safety words? Kat:                She means hygienically. [crosstalk 00:49:23]. We'll talk about it off camera. Patrick:            That's always a worry, yeah. Kat:                But since you ask the question, I'm just acknowledging it. It's a great opportunity for everybody. Patrick:            That's totally a chick question, yeah. Kat:                It a great opportunity. So Alexa she's a wise one.  Kat:                I don't know, what else? I think that's a lot of it. I just think it's about being okay with saying what you want and what you feel. But also being okay with whatever outcome comes of that. That's ultimately how I kind of, I guess, gradually grew inside of me to a place where I can now say anything to him and I will, I'll say what I'm thinking or feeling and I'll say it ... It still feels scary in the moment, if I'm saying something that's really vulnerable. But I really can say it without attachment. Because I'm at the end of the day - Patrick:            She said, "Watch you both get uncomfortable." I'm not uncomfortable at all. So just so you know. Kat:                She means about the physical sex thing. Patrick:            But my thing is, just so ... it's all good, I can talk, I don't mind. I get myself tested regularly. One of the reasons I do is because I definitely have a lot of respect for Kat and I don't want to do anything to fuck with her shit. You know what I mean?  Kat:                I do. [crosstalk 00:50:41] tested on. Patrick:            It's just something that every person should do anyways if you're sexually active.  Kat:                Your body language [inaudible 00:50:49].  Patrick:            You know what I mean? Kat:                All those [crosstalk 00:50:52] should get tested regularly if you're sexually active. Patrick:            Yeah, for sure. Kat:                I was going to say something.  Kat:                Here's one more thing I do want to say about this, right? I think about being safe to be yourself. It's about having a fundamental belief that you can't screw it up being you. One thing that I realised with our connection is, there's actually ... I honestly feel like there's nothing I could say to you that would scrap our connection. Because our connection is a soul connection. Even if we weren't hanging out. That connection is still there to stay. Patrick:            Yeah, for sure. Kat:                You can feel it energetically from when we're not talking or spending time together. So I kind of got to the realisation, probably party because I said a lot of shit to you that would definitely scare most men off. Then I was, "I think I could pretty much say anything to this guy and it's actually not going to ruin our connection, but it might cause us to pull in or out or whatever. But then we actually figure it out. I know you've said that to me a few times, we just figure everything out in the end anyway. But it - Patrick:            Well I'm going through my shit, and you're going through your shit. We're still going through things on the journey. You know what I mean?  Kat:                Right. Patrick:            It's just what it is. Kat:                But it's also, to me, that's representative of a real connection in your life. When you know that, you don't have to worry about how to communicate with that person. You can't fuck up the relationship by being yourself, it's not possible. That's when you know it's a real connection. Rather that something that's based on rules or fear or validation, is like, if I say this, then I'm going to get in trouble. Or if I say this they're going to think I'm a bad person or something like that. Or they're going to be whatever. Instead you realise, and this exactly what I teach in business, if you speak your actual truth, and it's meant to be, whatever it's meant to be. Then it will. And either way is fine. It's like signing up a client, just say what you fucking think. Say what's actually coming through you. If that scares them off, they were never meant to be there in the first place.  Patrick:            Exactly. Kat:                What are going on about? Pull in or out. Patrick:            Sex puns.  Kat:                Anything that we missed? Patrick:            No, I think we got it. They loved it so they're all commenting about it. Kat:                Thank you for watching. It's a pretty raw conversation, I guess. Patrick:            Yeah, I don't really care, I talk. I'll watch all your stuff, so I see ... I watch most of your stuff, so I see what you say and this stuff. I already know you, so you're giving them the 100% real deal. So they know that.  Kat:                It's what we do. Patrick:            Obviously you wouldn't be as popular if you didn't do that, so I've already seen that and know kind of how you think. So it's not a big deal. You'll probably be surprised as I talk more and more on my shit. As I put more of myself out there. You'll probably see some of the same stuff. Kat:                Even more truth coming out.  Patrick:            Yeah.  Kat:                Yep. Patrick:            So yeah, so look forward to it. Kat:                That's the thing, it's about being comfortable being uncomfortable. So much stuff I've published or there's been so muc

This week Jeremy talks to Chuck and Karen of the Rants and Reason podcast! On Rants and Reason, a Conservative (Karen) and a Liberal (Chuck) talk politics. BOOM!!! Right? Not so much. Rants and Reason show us all that the two sides CAN come together and talk like human beings. Follow Rants and Reason on Twitter @RantsReason Find Rants and Reason on Facebook at Rants and Reason Podcast Group   Follow PWLT on Twitter @PWLTpodcast Join the PWLT Facebook group at Podcasts We Listen To Go to www.podern.love to book tickets to the PodernLove podcast convention in New Orleans! While you are there, be sure to grab a hotel room at the convention site! The convention and hotel are conveniently located on the edge of the French Quarter so you can experience the famous New Orleans nightlife after the convention each night! Check out Jeremy's new podcast with Co-Host Deana Marie of the TwistedPhilly podcast! It's called Educating Jeremy! Deana has Jeremy watch the movies that she loves which he hasn't seen. The two discuss the good, the bad, the ugly and the downright weird.     

Click above to listen in iTunes... Crazy, I've never had to thing about this stuff before. WOO!!! Hey. What's going on everyone? It's Steve Larsen. You're listening to Sales Funnel Radio. Welcome to Sales Funnel Radio, where you'll learn marketing strategies to grow your online business, using today's best internet sales funnels. Now, here's your host, Steve Larsen. How you guys doing? Have you guys ever seen those oxygen restriction masks? Those things are nuts. I bought one. This morning I went on this run and it was so much harder than I ever anticipated it being. I used to backpack a lot. I know I talked about that a couple times. When I was backpacking there was this time we climbed Pikes Peak. If you know what that is, it's very famous mountain in Colorado. It's funny because there's a tram that takes you up to the top. It's above 14,000 feet. When you get that high, I mean, walking just takes the breath out of you. It feels like you're exercising when you're just walking. We climbed it though. We started super early in the morning, we start climbing up this thing. It's so funny, when you start getting above tree line, which is usually around 11,000 feet, meaning it's so high that trees can't grow anymore, so it's above tree line, you start getting really deliberate in the steps that you take. It was funny because ... That was a very challenging hike actually. I liked it a lot. It was funny because, I started feeling like that this morning when I just put this mask on. If I run down to the street light, that's just a street light and back, that's two miles. Almost on the dot...  It's funny it took me an extra five, ten minutes than it normally would because I was just sucking wind. I even had it on the lowest setting. I was like, "Good grief." I forgot my high altitude lungs are just gone. Anyway. Anyway. Hey, I've been listening to and re-listening to all of the old funnel hacking live speeches. All of them. It's been a lot of fun. I'm almost done with the 2016 replays. I'll go back to the 2015 replays soon, then I'll go to 2017. I don't really know why I started in that order but I did. It's been a lot of fun to go back through and do that. It's fascinating to remember, "Oh yeah, remember when I had that aha, that was at this event here. Or I remember this personal development growth piece, this happened here or there or whatever." What's interesting is to go back and listen to all the things and I'm like, "How come I never heard them say that the first time?" Right? I think it's the reason why, I mean, my two year old and my four year old I still have to say the same things to them over and over and over again. "Hey, stop hitting your sister. Hey, be nice. Hey, be nice. Hey, hey, hey." You know what I mean? It's just human nature we all have to hear things a million times before we actually hear it. Which I think is kind of fascinating when you think of it like that. That's why I always laugh when someone's like, "I already read the book Expert Secrets." I'm like, "That is one of the most core marketing books that is in existence today. You've only read it once?" Right? I just re-read 108 Split Tests. I did. Okay? Why? Because there's all these things that you continue to get from it over and over and over again. Right? When they are the classics, when they're the things that change the way a market behaves, why would you not study them like crazy? Right? I listen to an awesome course. It's by Perry Belcher. If you can't handle swearing don't listen to it. It's by Perry Belcher and it's ... Oh my gosh. Is it the Secret Selling System? I think that's what it is. That course is freaking amazing. It's like 18 hours but that is fantastic. I'm going to go back and re-listen to that here shortly I think 'cause man that was incredible. Anyway. I keep going back to the greats. I keep going back ... What's funny is that there's so much new material around me at all times that I have not even begun to dive into because I feel like I've not mastered some of the simple things that are right in front of me. Do you know what I mean? I only like to learn things for a purpose. Even all the DISC tests and all the 16 personalities tests, all that stuff, that even says so in there. Right? I only like to listen and learn and study from things that I will use right now. I am not a good general learner, which has turned out to be a big blessing because I don't get distracted by all this other garbage that frankly it doesn't matter that I'm on or not. Right? Anyway. One of the things I was picking up today and I was kind of refreshing my mind on was a book that I read in college. It's funny when you read things the first time and when you're brand new ... Not brand new. When you're not as experienced in an industry and you start reading the books from that industry, it's funny how the first few books or courses you take is just like mind blowing. You're like, "Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh that's so crazy. What? You automate your emails out and to think all the soap opera series?" Right, that's like the most basic thing on the planet. Right? Especially for our world and what we do right? So, what I think is interesting about this is I went through and I picked up this book that I read in college and at the time I was like, "It was really good. I really enjoyed the first half of it." It's a book called Visionary Business by Mark Allen. I'll be honest. The first half of the book I got some good things from it. The second half got a little weird. It was talking about how the business has a soul and stuff like that. I was like, "Ah, I don't know about that." That business has a value ladder. That business has a really cool offer. Right? A sexy offer. Some false beliefs. I don't think it has a soul. Anyway. I don't know, maybe I'm just not open minded enough or something like that. I don't know. It's fascinating though, 'cause one of the realizations I had, and this is where I'm trying to take this episode just so you know, one of the realizations that I had as I ... It was probably about three or four years ago, was that I was studying areas of business that did not apply to where I was at the time. Okay? I know I've talked about this before as well, right? Just in time learning, stuff like that. I believe it's good in phases. You know what I mean? Every once in a while you got to just drink deeply and I can tell. I can tell. I'm not exactly sure when but I can tell that sometime soon I'm going to go through a really, really, really deep learning phase and it's going to be me primarily focusing on the seven to eight figure area. I think that my webinar's going to hit a million bucks probably summer to the latter part of the year. Somewhere in there. I think that's when I'll hit it. Then, primarily where I've been focusing is the zero to one figure area, right? 'Cause that's where my personal thing is on right now. While I've made a million bucks for a lot of other people many times, this one of my own, that's what I've been focusing on obviously. What I realized though is three, four years ago I was studying these areas of business that I was not in. It was just general learning and therefore I was a distraction and I was literally getting nowhere. It's fascinating 'cause I picked this book up again this morning, Visionary Business, and I start looking through the book and I start reading through it again. I was looking at just ... My habit is that if something's really, really amazing I will fold the bottom corner of the page so next time I pick the book back up again I'll look at the key points. If you look at all my books that's one of the reasons it takes me so long to read them, but the reason why is because I can come back later and I just look at all the corners of the pages that are folded up on the bottom and I can read just that part again. I'm like, "Oh yeah, that was like the core thing of this part. Oh yeah, that was like the core idea of this one." Right? I can pick back up really quickly and refresh what I need to. It works well. Anyways. I was doing that and I picked up Visionary Business and I started looking through and I was looking through all the little turned up corners on the bottom page and it was fascinating because there's some really interesting ... I liked some of the key parts that it teaches about management. I don't know why the heck I was studying management when I had no one to manage. Right? You know, I saw it, just barely launched the hiring funnel. Thank you to those of you guys who are applying. I appreciate that a lot actually. Those of you guys who want to work with me, that really means a lot. If you did not hear that episode it's like two episodes before this one it's called My Hiring Funnel. You can back up and just listen to those. Anyway. Awesome stuff... I was looking this up again and there's these two different styles of management that it goes through. This is what it says. Okay? It was on page 68. It says, "There are two styles of management. Management by crisis, and management by goals. Those caught in the management by crisis trap are always working in the business and never have time to work on the business. Their vision of the future is lost." I think that's fascinating. It's very much a ... You know, we should all react to crisis obviously well and try and move on but I totally understand, I totally get that. Right? Management by crisis, management by crisis. Right? Oh my gosh. We're going to have this bad thing happen and this bad thing happen and this bad thing will happen. You almost bring to fruition your fears, rather than focusing on what the goals are and that's what you bring to fruition. Right? That's what you should actually bring to the present now and actually make happen... I thought that was kind of interesting. The only reason I'm bringing this up is because I'm hiring people now. Right? I have actual employees. Number one, I'm an actual employee of my own business. That's how we structured it. Pretty soon my wife probably will be also and things like that, and that's great. But I have an actual employee now. You know? Now I look at this and I'm like, "Management by crisis. Huh." I've had a ton of VA's, right? But this is my first real employee. W2 employee. Actual employee, right? I'm excited. It's going to be so fun, right? He's not starting for a little bit here but I'm super excited to have him. You guys will all know who he is. I'll introduce him. He's the man. I wouldn't have hired him otherwise obviously. We actually have quite the history together, which is kind of cool. It's funny that that's how that's turning out. We're getting back together, getting the band back together man it's going to be awesome... Anyway. It's going to be a lot of fun. What I'm doing though is I'm looking through and I'm thinking management by crisis. That's fascinating. How do I avoid a management by crisis scenario and instead, how do I manage by vision, by goals, right? Obviously there's times for both. But how do I primarily stay in the management by goals area? Anyway. I thought that was kind of interesting. I can't remember, I was at a fad event or I don't know, I was coaching someone I can't remember who it was but they were asking, "How do I find good people? How do I find good people?" I know I talked about this a little bit in the hiring episode but this is the phase I'm in so I'm just kind of documenting my stuff as I'm going through here, right? Anyway. It was fascinating 'cause I was watching Russell and I was listening to Russell and he said, "Hey, I always hire from within." That's what he said that time when ... I mean, he sent out a whole bunch of emails. I've watched him do a lot of things like that where he hires from within. He hires from within the culture, which is why it's important to build it. Right? Expert Secrets talks about that. You build the culture. As you're building the culture you're actually having these true believers come out of the woodwork. Right? Me. Right? It's safe to say that I'm a click funnels fanatic. People know that and he knows that and everyone knows that and that's fine and they should. It's great. But his ability to create culture is what allowed him to hire from within and that's what I'm trying to say is start thinking through hey what's your management style and things like that, but so much of it will already be dictated by how your culture has been set. Right? Russell had to spend zero time indoctrinating me. When he hired me. He had to spend zero time teaching me click funnels. Zero time. You know what I mean? It's because I was so into it already. That's all I've been doing is looking for the individuals who are so into what I do. Right? I always say, you guys are going to get like 10% of the people who follow you to just be like the fanatics. The people that are crazy, right? I'm sure I'll throw some kind of event. I'm sure I'll throw some kind of my own inner circle summit or some kind of coaching. Something in the future of my own, right? It'll be 10% of you that are really, really, really Steve Larson fanatics and would love to come hang out, and would love to learn the next piece, and would love to ... That's exactly what happened at the last Mastermind that we through, right? That's exactly it. You have to understand that's the natural progression but I did not worry about that or focus on it until now. Right? Meaning I've been building the culture. I've been building all that stuff but I'm not studying management til I need it. Right? Then again, I'm not even really studying it because they're already indoctrinated into what my vision is. Right? I want to change the world. I don't exactly know how yet but I know I do. Right? It took me a long time to have the cojones to say that kind of thing. I always thought that was kind of weird, like, "Oh yeah I want to change the world ha ha ha. Oh ha ha." Right? I don't know why I was always timid about saying that kind of thing but not anymore. Right? I'm trying to find other individuals who are also like that. It's been kind of fun because I know those of you guys that have been applying to work with me, whether as a funnel builder, an assistant, a support person, a high ticket salesman, you understand where I'm trying to drive the ship. That's the benefit of doing it that way, which is kind of fun. It's really fun actually. Anyways. That's all I really want to say in this episode. Start building culture because when it comes time to actually hire, you've got to be able to have that culture that's already there so that you can hire from people who are already indoctrinated. Anyway. There's another cool quote, I was looking at another one of the turned pages in this book Visionary Business. Again, I really like the first half of this book. The second half for me got a little woo woo. I don't mind woo woo but in a business? There's nothing innately spiritual in my business itself. My logo is not speaking to me, you know? I'm the one driving it. You know what I mean? If anything it's the woo woo in me. Anyway. We can go on a whole other topic there. I'm going to pack up. This last half of the book was a little bit weird for me but it was on page 92 about halfway down, it says, "Hire people who are passionate about their jobs and who have the suitable personality for the job. Hire a technician for a technician's job and a manager for a manager's job." I think that's so true. Gosh, that's so true. Understand what you are innately geared to do and it's one of the reasons why I have people take the DISC test. It's one of the reasons why I have people take that 16 personalities test, why I have them film a video. If you can't film a video and put it on YouTube and give me the link, you are already not suited to work with my stuff. You know what I mean? That makes sense. I know you all know to do that but that's the reason why I do that. Anyway. It's been kind of fun to go through that and start looking at these different management styles, make sure I'm not managing by crisis. Make sure I'm managing through goals. It's like, "Hey, let's go here. Let's drive there." I'm trying to do it in a way where I'm not babysitting. Right? Not that I need to. Not that I'm going to have to with this guy. He's the man. I know I'm not going to have to. Right? He's the man. But you know when you were growing up, I'm sure we all did this to a degree. We're all growing up, mom and dad give you a task right? Or whoever. Your guardian, whatever it was. Whenever you were younger somebody gave you a task. It could be a teacher, right? You were given a task. The moment that individual walked away you had such a less fire in the gut to get that activity done. Right? Same thing when I was in the army you guys, which by the way I'm finally finishing up the paperwork. I'll be out of the army here very shortly, which is very, very exciting actually. But anyway. In the army, right? A commander or a first sergeant or someone of authority would come up and give some kind of task and everyone would be like, "Roger. Oh yeah, I'll get it done." As soon as they leave sometimes it'd be like, "Oh, okay we have like three hours to do that thing. We really need like 30 minutes. Okay, well we're all just going to hangout for a little while and [inaudible 00:16:14]." Right? Then that person comes back and everyone acts busy again. Right? That's not the management style or scenario or culture that you want inside your business. Right? What's so awesome is the people that I'm hiring, especially this guy, I'm so excited for him to come in because I already know that his culture and my culture together match and mix and we do well. I am not babysitting. I am not managing by crisis. I am not managing as a babysitter. Right? I'm setting the goals, I'm saying, "Let's do this. Let's do this over here. Let's take that mountain. Let's do it." I don't have to be in the room for those things to be done. I'm so thankful for that because I can quote so many jobs and I'm sure you can as well, where that was the culture. Where as soon as the individual left, right? As soon as the individual left nothing happened. Nothing happened. That was management by force. Right? Management by crisis. Terrible management style to be a part of that. Anyway. Those are the things kind of going through my head with this and hopefully that's helpful somehow. Understand, again, I didn't worry about any of this stuff until I needed it. I don't know if worry is the right word either but I'm not concerning myself with it until I need it. I really don't need it that hard anyway because the people that I'm hiring and bringing on are already indoctrinated. I think it almost negates some of the things that are in this book is also kind of what I'm saying. You don't have to do all those pieces so deeply. Right? That a lot of these other management books will talk when you have a strong culture in the business and when you hire from within. That's the main key. That's all I'm trying to say in this. It's kind of a long winded way to say it but anyways guys. Hopefully that's helpful. Thanks so much for being a listener and we are well past 100,000 downloads now. I just have not had time to actually go and create the new intro music, which I'm very excited to do. There's something special with it that I'm trying to put in it so anyway, it will be done hopefully shortly. Alright guys, talk to you later. Bye. Thanks for listening to Sales Funnel Radio. Please remember to subscribe and leave feedback. Want to get one of today's best interest sales funnels for free? Go to salesfunnelbroker.com/freefunnels to download your prebuilt sales funnel today.

If you want something done, you gotta do it yourself. Right? Not always. Sometimes you have to ask for help - an ear, a shoulder, a Task Rabbit?  For me, that revelation came when I attempted my first home improvement project thanks to YouTube and maybe a little too much confidence. It's a comical story with a fortunate lesson that allowed me to see that some problems require help and there's nothing wrong with that.  ----- Let's Connect! Have a question? Want to recommend a topic or guest? Email me: monica@youwannadowhat.com Follow me on Instagram and Facebook

Life Insurance expert Billy McDougall, takes us on a journey that can completely evolve your life insurance business. Learn why questions are the key to success. View more at MarkMiletello.com. Note: “Where The Insurance Pros Meet” is an audio podcast and is meant for the ear. A transcript of the audio is provided for referencing a particular section or for you to follow along. Listen to the episode to get the most out of our show. We use both speech recognition software and human transcribers to create the transcripts so they may contain errors. If you’re going to quote us in print, please be sure to check the corresponding audio. TRANSCRIPT   Speaker 1: Where the Insurance Pros Meet, Episode Four. Billy McDougall: He said, "Your credibility, your professionalism, all of that is going to be defined not by the things that you say, not by the things that you prove in terms of your product knowledge, but by the quality of your question." Speaker 1: Where the Insurance Pros Meet is a Podcast that brings the greatest talent in the world together. Managers, coaches, and producers. The very best experts the insurance and financial services industry has to offer. Get ready to change the way you do business to have your most successful year ever. Now, here's Mark Miletello, a top 1% producer, manager, and your host of Where the Insurance Pros Meet. Mark Miletello: Welcome to the show. Thanks for joining us. Today is an exciting day. I think most of you are going to gravitate toward our guest that we have because he is an agent. He's an agent who started from scratch. One of my first hires as I went into management 10 years ago. He started really from the medical sales industry and transitioned into the insurance industry. To be able to watch him from day one of his career has been a real treat. He's led my agency. He's been a leader in the company. I believe you're going to love to hear from our guest, Billy McDougall. Billy McDougall: Hey, Mark. Thanks for having me. Mark Miletello: Well, I'm excited to be with you and a couple reasons why. One is you are an agent that I've watched come into this business from an outside industry. You've started from scratch. I've watched the progression of going and you learning different styles. You've learned from several people in the industry, and you've continued to evolve until now. You have one of the most dynamic and powerful life insurance discussions I believe I've ever seen. I'd like to think I played a part in helping you get there, but I'm excited to see the success you're having. You've won back to back Agent of the Years, as well as you are a fireman and you risk your life right now in the California wildfires to protect us, to thank you for your service and welcome to the show. Billy McDougall: Thanks, Mark. Appreciate it. Yeah, I do want to extend a thank you to you. You laid the groundwork for me in this industry. You helped me get my peanut or meet me and just figure out what it meant to have discussions, meaningful discussions with clients. You've also helped me to reach out within the industry and find the very best and brightest and to try and [inaudible 00:02:46] my discussion even more, so thank you for everything you've provided for myself and for my family. Mark Miletello: Well, thank you. Of course, you're my client, so thank you. Having you part of the test pilot group with this entirely new life discussion ... Tell us first before we get into what you're doing now, and using you as the Guinea pig and the test pilot of really transforming and evolving our life discussion. Now, what we're basically launched on VanMark.life. Tell us a little bit about when you got started. Some of the struggles you've had, some of the successes you've had in discussing life insurance. Billy McDougall: Honestly, when I started, I didn't really know much of anything about life insurance. I was joining what I thought was just a PNC company and then it was made very apparent that we were primarily a life insurance company, and that honestly kind of scared me a little bit because you must own car insurance by law. You must have home insurance to carry a mortgage, but you don't have to have life insurance, and I was fearful of how it would be received by clients. I did, I guess I grew in my knowledge of it. Really embraced and just fall in love with the product, and the need that we instill in families. I'd say that I started by just trying to establish a level of professional knowledge with my clients. I think if you go back and listen to the types of discussions that I had with clients when I first started, they were effective relative to product knowledge. Mark Miletello: Right. Billy McDougall: They weren't super effective relative to generating a discussion. They were still very much one-sided. I believe I probably did 90% of the talking and the client only did 10%, and hopefully, I was able to stay in their good graces long enough to let me finish through that discussion. Mark Miletello: Oh no, I agree. As a matter of fact, I think I still have that recording where you came into my office eight or nine years ago and delivered a mock, not presentation, of course. But at the time, I was your only liaison to the industry, so you were basically duplicating my process and maybe a couple others that I introduced you to. I think that's kind of the way we've all been taught, or maybe we feel like even, regardless of the way we've been taught or not, it's so much information we feel like we must get through within an hour, which ends up sometimes becoming two hours that we feel like we have to talk 90% of the time. Right? Billy McDougall: Correct. Yes. Honestly, part of that for me was when I first started, I thought that I had to legitimize myself in being a professional in the eyes of the client. I believe that that was done by showing them how extensive my product knowledge was. Mark Miletello: Right. Billy McDougall: That lends itself to a presentation-style discussion. Mark Miletello: Well, when you say "presentation-style discussion", expand on that and tell us what that means to you. Billy McDougall: Well, I think I was very effective in getting across points. Whether or not those were received is a completely different aspect, in whether they're received in the way that they want to be received. It's kind of like, what do they say? You throw a spaghetti at the wall and see what sticks. That's how those presentations were. Though they were effective, and I was able to sell life insurance with those, they were a lot of work. It was trying for myself to keep the clients engaged. I had to constantly battle and do work against their attention spans, relative to what I thought was hopefully important in their lives, instead of me really having a good discussion where they're doing 90% of the talking. They're engaging me, and we're addressing things that are relevant to the first and foremost, relative to these products. Mark Miletello: When you say "presenting", I think what I heard you say is you feel like when you call it a "presentation" or you're presenting to the client, you feel like 90% of the time you're talking because you're trying to express a level of professionalism through your product knowledge, through the extensive details of the bells and whistles of the product, right? Billy McDougall: Yeah. Mark Miletello: Great analogy. You're throwing spaghetti against the wall to see what sticks. What that means is you're spewing this product knowledge so much that every now and then, something sticks. But you know what? You did a pretty darn good job of it. You came right in, won trips, won Agent of the Year, led my agency for three or four years in a row. What was so bad about it if it works? Billy McDougall: It wasn't so bad. In fact, it was tremendously effective. But it made it very hard for me to consider a change. In fact, there are national speakers that I had heard multiple times, multiple years in a row before I made a commitment to do something different. I can't even honestly tell you what triggered that desire to make a change, but I finally did. I took a leap of faith and I completely rearranged my ... The presentation is gone. It's not a presentation at all. Everything now is a discussion with the client, where I'd say they're doing at least 50% of the talking. On a good day, much, much more. It's much more engaging for them. It's much more specific for what they care about, and it's much more effective in terms of making sure you have a good product then because ethically then for me, ultimately, I only want what's best for the client, and their opinion is the one that matters. If I'm giving them a presentation, how am I meeting their needs? I'll tell you, I've had just so much fun in changing this into a true discussion, helping them organize their thoughts around important concepts like life insurance, financial planning, based on helping them by leading them through a sequence of questions that are relevant to those things to understand what matters to them. Mark Miletello: Well, I heard you say something in there. A strange word to our industry in the form of meeting with a client, but you said you have fun with clients. I remember when you and I were on the cuff, and it's okay to say it. You and I were together, following Van Miller, and Van Miller and I, of course, have developed VanMark.life, which you were instrumental in helping us. At this point, I don't know who comes up with what. I'm sure it all stems back from Van, and Van says it stems even further back to the mentors in his. Yes, whether it's Gary Kinder, or Tom Hegna, or Brian McKnight, or Van Miller, or all those things, I do recall, and it's been about two years for myself, so I'm trying to put the timeline together. But you and I decided at some point that we had to start with the first step of calling our new, evolved presentation, if you will, a life insurance discussion. I think that was the first step of reminding us of, number one, not to talk so much. Right? Not to just continually beat them up with bells and whistles and product knowledge. At some point, we ... I still let it slip every now and then, but I've conditioned myself to even call the training platform and its own lifeinsurancediscussion.com, that that's the first step I think, Billy, that you and I walked through was to start reshaping how we talk to clients by even what we call what we're doing. Then you said, "having fun in a meeting". How do you have fun at a meeting? I mean, I think we all think it's a little bit fun what we do, especially when we win and we make sales and have success. But I think you're talking about a different kind of fun. Right? Billy McDougall: Always at some level in the meeting, you have the sensation that you're helping lead them down a road, and I think that the client has that same sensation. Van Miller is just fantastic and been listening to him speak over multiple years now, multiple occasions. One of the things that he said, and this goes back to where I was trying to establish, initially when I was new in the industry, my credibility, he said, "Your credibility, your professionalism, all of that is going to be defined not by the things that you say, not by the things that you prove in terms of your product knowledge, but by the quality of your questions." I just thought that was just the oddest thing to hear, and I wrote it down multiple times from multiple speeches that he's given on national podiums or regional podiums. Finally, I internalized that. It's been incredible, the things that he said. I literally just last week had someone who said, "You're the most knowledgeable insurance and financial advisor I have ever met with, and I'm 51 years old and I've been dealing with people my whole life. For the first time, I really have a sense of understanding and comfort in what I'm trying to accomplish." That's because I had him do all the talking. Everything was questioned. The thought process is we all want to be good at insurance and financial planning, as clients. As clients, we want to be good at that. We want to do it well. There's nothing in there that is exceptionally difficult. Everything is very much common sense, but people don't have organized thoughts around those considerations, so they can conclude, so the types of questions we ask help them organize their thoughts around insurance and financial planning. When you do that, it becomes a lot of fun because it's truly a fun, interesting conversation, give and take, instead of, "Let me control this time so I can have you here, understand, and value what I'm trying to share." It truly has just been interesting conversations, and you have to be willing to put yourself out for that. Once I finally did, I was just like kicking myself, going, "Oh my gosh. I should have done this years ago. I should have trusted Van in the very beginning because it has absolutely changed the way my clients view me. It has changed my level of enjoyment and excitement in terms of what I'm doing, and it absolutely changed consistency, and satisfaction, referrals." Across the board, it's just opened the floodgates in terms of changing my business. Mark Miletello: I talked to Van, and as of the recording of this show, as of today, I just launched the lifeinsurancediscussion.com training platform that allows the agent to walk through that same process that you and I have walked through in an organized fashion. It's just funny that you haven't even seen the finished product, but you know that what it took you and me... You're right. You and I heard Van say it. We went to four different speeches where we've heard him talk. We had the same set of notes. I even told Van this last week. I said, "Van, it's hard when something works for someone, and whether you're selling five life apps a year or a hundred, whether you're selling $5,000 in premium or $50,000 as a multiple-line agent, or $250,000 or more, you feel like you have a process that somehow works, that gets the job done." I remember you saying earlier, you had to decide to throw all that out of the window. It's not that we forget because we still have those things, those stories and those discussions that we can pull out, such as stories of the farmer and the seed and things like that. But I think what took you and me two years to get to was letting go of the way we do things and say, "Okay ... " The funny thing, Billy, you and I have challenged each other to have a complete interview discussion with a client, and try to ask questions the entire time. Now, I think it's virtually impossible if you were to record yourself to not have a statement in that entire 45-minute or hour-long meeting. You're going to have statements. Billy McDougall: Of course. Mark Miletello: But I think it's a fun challenge for each other to say, "Hey Billy, let's try to go through an entire life insurance discussion with just asking questions." I've tried to do that. It's impossible, but it's fun to try. Billy McDougall: Yeah, and Van has some interesting nuances that he uses in his discussion. When he needs to address a point to drive home a concept for them to consider and decide how they value that concept, he'll ask them. He'll say, "Do you mind if I share a story with you?" Now, you're engaging them instead of just launching into, "Well, I've got a story for you about this." Or, "Do you mind if I share with you this aspect or another?" Those little nuances help to keep that sensation, that feeling of it being very conversational, even in points where you need to get them a little bit of detail so that they can make a better determination of their opinion. Mark Miletello: Billy, you and I have kind of started this path together a few years ago, like I mentioned. At times, we've talked about it, we've shared notes. I put together a PowerPoint of my thoughts and even recorded voice-over over each slide. At the same time, I give you credit for doing the final piece of the puzzle that needed to be done for me as an agent. Not talking about management. I'm just saying as an agent in the business, as peers I guess I should say, what I credit you is getting it on one page. That's what I've always told every educational department I've worked with, and process that I've been. You must get it on one page for agents to wrap their brain. I'm giving you the credit on the show for being the guy who put the final pieces of the puzzle and got this life insurance discussion on one page. Can you tell us the importance of that, how you did it, and tell us about that one page? Billy McDougall: Absolutely. Well, first, none of that is original content. None of that is an original thought. All of that is stuff that I've garnered basically standing on the shoulders of giants. People like Van Miller, people like yourself, other people in the industry, Tom Hegna, using their concepts and their ideas. I said, "Okay, there's such a great amount of knowledge there, and I'm just not that smart of a guy. What I really need to do is I need to have a way, on a consistent basis, whether I'm on and having good discussions with clients, or whether I'm a little flat and I'm not good. On a consistent basis, something that can ground me and help me stay on track in terms of not a presentation, but in terms of appropriate ideas to bring up questions about, to discuss." What I did is I took basically some of the main components that I feel like I identify the most, taxes, volatility, fees, inflation, leverage, and I kind of built out, I don't know if you want to call it an outline or an agenda. It's just something that's good for me so that I can track along with the client and I know where I'm going next, and we address those things in that way. I'm able to be consistent in my discussions. The discussions go whichever way the client wants them to go. But I'm sure we've all been in meetings where a client brings up something, you're off on a tangent, and you never end up back to addressing some of these issues and concerns that really the client needs to consider for them to have organized thoughts and move forward in the insurance or the financial world. Mark Miletello: Yes, and having an agenda ... Really, I've gotten away later in my career from using or having an agenda. You've been one of the few agents that I've worked with that has always used an agenda, and you make no excuse. In fact, you make it a great thing. You tell the client, "I have an agenda, so we don't get off track. We're going to go through this, and I'm going to actually take notes and give you a copy of this." That's one thing that I've just been amazed at the way that you do is that the notes that you have from your meetings are by far the best that I've ever seen. It's better than my own. What I like about it, and back in the early days when you needed my help, and you would send me that, it would just blow me away. But what it does is it helps you keep a record of the client's goals, dreams, wishes, needs, and deliver that back to the client and present that back to the client by saying, "This is what you told me, and this is how we're going to fix it," which I think is a great idea that I've seen very few people, if any, do in a life insurance discussion or sale. But putting it on one page, then an agent can take all this world of information that we've been gathering for two years, and thinking that it's just so much. It's drinking from a fire hose, using a fireman aspect there. That's what I felt, and I've led this industry as a life insurance agent, and to me, it was like drinking from a fire hose. To me, having it on one page helps you wrap your brain around, "Hey, I can do this. I can learn this. Not only that, I can deliver this." You've told us a little bit about where you've come from. You've discussed what a presentation means to you, and you've really defined it since you've been talking. But point blank, Billy, now I'll ask you the question. What is a life insurance discussion, and how can an agent stop everything that they're doing? What were some of the recommendations you would make about having a discussion? Tell us what a discussion means to you. Billy McDougall: That's a tough question to answer, but I'll tell you how I formulated my process for asking good, relevant questions. First, I had to identify the areas that made sense to discuss, and we already kind of went into some of those things. There can be many more areas, and you can add that to your agenda. "What other items do you have on the table, Mr. Client or Mrs. Client, that you would like addressed here?" Mark Miletello: Right. Billy McDougall: Once I identified those, it was really a test. I sat down with multiple people, and I went through the process and they'd stop me. They say, "No, you're telling. You're not asking." I'd have to step back and think, "Okay, I don't want to lead a client in a direction. That's unethical. What I want to do is discuss a topic." You can drown them in some stuff briefly about it, but get their opinions on it. What that discussion looked like for me? Don't get me wrong, I think that Van does have the finest questions in the industry. His CDs are on repeat in my car. I've listened to them for hundreds of hours. I happen to have long commutes, so it allows me that time. That stuff just comes out in the discussion. But it was coming out just kind of randomly. I wasn't using it very effectively. The reason that I went to that one-page outline or agenda was to help make sure that I captured those specific things. Van impressed upon us a handful of things. He said, "You should be silent in the discussion. It really should be the client who does almost all the talking. Your discussions should be short. They should be 45 minutes or less." That is just scary and painful to hear. That includes taking applications. That's Van's recommendation. Mark Miletello: Yeah. Billy McDougall: That's hard for me. I'm a pretty analytical person, and that's been a real big thing for me to do. Van says, "If there's an analytical bone in your body, you need to get rid of it right now because you can't be that way." He speaks well. He has this concept of, "You know, it's your responsibility. You are the financial professional. It's your responsibility to know every little minute detail of how your product works, the implications to your clients. All that stuff is you. Now, your responsibility in helping a client understand what they need is not necessarily explaining to them every specific detail about how that product works, but instead, what that product does for them. That's dictated by the things they deem to be important." That was a shift for me, being an analytical person. Instead of digging so deeply into individual things, talking more about broader concepts. I find that 95% of my discussion with clients is broad, on large topics, broad in scope, and maybe 5% of the time we may look at an illustration. Mark Miletello: Yeah. Billy McDougall: It has probably flipped from what it was when I started in the industry. You're so focused on solutions, and you hear that in the industry. Right? "Don't be solution-focused. Work on the problem. What does the client want?" But I just didn't know how to bridge that gap, and Van's information, the way that he has interviews with clients has been super effective in helping me do that. I just had to organize a way for me to be able to have that discussion consistently with each client. Mark Miletello: Yeah, and that's why Van and I came together is that, again, two years of following him and listening to the CDs, hundreds of hours, trying to figure out a way to have a discussion and ask questions, versus ... That's a tough thing to do, and it's a hard process. It's tough to swallow, but it can be done. I think it's hard to continue on and giving the listener out there exactly how to do it, and that's why I told Van, I said, "We need to come together, form VanMark.life, and we need to show people a process where they can learn what took us two years to learn, they can learn in two weeks. They can learn in two months." Having it on a training platform so that they can walk through what you and I walked through every step of the way, but much faster, and get to that realization that how do you not talk about the product when that's what you're there to offer? The bottom line is, you're talking more, like you said, of big picture items. You're talking strategies and you're talking philosophies. Yeah, it's very effective. It's a dynamic. It is fun. You walk out of there feeling like you really are on the side of the client, instead of presenting a product. Billy, I appreciate your time. Looking back over your career and the successes you've had, can you pinpoint one area where you would tell a new agent, "Don't make this mistake." Did you have a fumble at some point along the way that you would guide a new agent or maybe a veteran agent not to make the same mistake? Billy McDougall: I think that we've all fumbled in our careers. I certainly have. I like to try and be very honest about those so that I have them as an opportunity to learn. Have a level of humility that allows you to be open to input from everyone. Someone who's a lesser agent with less experience can give you valuable input that you can implement to be successful. I'd say the biggest thing, the biggest mistake I have made is the unwillingness to change when I feel like, "Hey something's working. I've got a process. It's going to be hard for me to consider doing something else." But I certainly wasn't going to do any better, and I wasn't going to help my clients any better by continuing to do what I was doing. There is only so much time in a day. The top producers have better products, business. More commissions on the book, more premiums on the book, more people helped. They have the same amount of time in the day that we do, so listening to Van a hundred times say, "You need to stop doing what you're doing and try something different to make yourself better, and to be a better resource for your client." Stepping away and doing that is a big leap of faith, and I wish I had done it sooner because you're fearful of change. But that change makes my career so much more fun, so much more rewarding. Mark Miletello: Well, I love those late-night calls where you say, "Mark, I wrote a 2,000-a-month permanent life insurance plan." "I wrote a 300-a-month term life app, and the client begged me for it." You're having much more fun, and I think I get it, and I try to be that way. I try to take your advice. I want to always continue learning, but sometimes you think you know enough and you stop learning. I think that's your fumble is you need to be coachable, right? Even at our stage, whether you're a new agent or a veteran agent or in between, you need to be able to look around, evolve what you do. You must constantly evolve, for sure. Billy McDougall: Absolutely. Mark Miletello: Yeah, so let me ask you this. You've been in the industry for 10 years. You've seen a lot of change, and I'll put you on the spot. In this show, we like to get a professional prediction. What do you see 10 years down the road, and let's kind of keep the topic in life insurance? I know you're a multiple-line agent, and that makes you even more phenomenal for life premium that you collect. But looking down the road, what is your professional opinion and advice to the agent? What does the industry look like, and how do we fit in? Billy McDougall: I don't know the answer to that, of course. Nobody does, but my best guess would be, at a certain point, the government's going to take some of these tools away from us. These are tools that we want people to get an opportunity to have organized thought around those things, consider them, determine if they want them, and have access to them. There is some level of urgency, and it's not on the client. It's on us. It's on us as agents. We need to be as effective as we can in having quality discussions. Not pushing products, not selling products, but reaching out to as many people and giving them information so that they can make good decisions for their families. It's okay if they thoughtfully reject ideas, but it's not okay if they're never given the opportunity to do that. There are only a few times in a person's life where they're going to talk to a professional like you. Scarcity, there's going to be some of that moving forward in the next 10 years. Mark Miletello: Well said. Well said. You're right. It's a fun question. I like to hear what professionals in the industry think about our future. It's always optimistic that we're going to be needed. I love what you say, that we're going to be even more needed to have a better discussion and ... You're right. Giving the client just the opportunity to have the discussion is what most agents aren't giving their clients.I want to tell you to thank you for joining us on Where the Insurance Pros meet. You are a consummate pro. I like to think of you like my big brother, and of course, I'm older than you so I can't say that. But I like to think of you in the way that I think of him that every time I get around him, I learn something. Billy, if I can say one thing about you, that's what I would say is I learned something. Thanks for now becoming a mentor of mine. Billy McDougall: Hey, same with you, Mark. I appreciate you very much. Thank you, sir. Mark Miletello: Thank you.

Yesterday I was talking about excessive chaotic activity, and how it can lead to losing the Path. Today we’re going to stay focused. Yes, really focused on one single goal. And you may say, that’s really good! Right? Not necessarily...

Clients are essential to the endurance of any business. The more clients you have, the better it is for business. Right? Not always. That may work if you lived in a perfect world, but in reality, you will come across some clients that are just tough to deal with and not a good fit for you or your business. When businesses choose the right clients, their organizations become productive, efficient, and focused. And they also end up treating clients like partners, which only serves to boost each other’s businesses even more. On today's podcast, we discuss how to qualify your next client. We discussed: 1) How understanding your own criteria first is important 2) Asking the right questions can make all the difference 3) Trusting your instincts If you haven’t already, check out this podcast episode where we give you actionable advice on how to qualify your clients so that you can really enjoy your business.

Cold Calling – it’s unpleasant, ineffective, a waste of time & makes everyone crabby. Right? Not so fast - There’s a growing number of thought leaders who maintain that cold calling in fact DOES work and has a place in sales today. Speaker, partner and lead trainer for eCenter Training, Jeff Goldberg, joins Dan Walker with the scoop in this 10-minute podcast.

During WWII, there was a mathematician named Abraham Wald. Wald had an idea about allied bombers. Essentially, bombers were coming back after bombing runs with a lot of damage. Engineers were saying "okay, there's a lot of damage in the wings and tail, so that's where we should put the armor." Right? Not so much. Wald's analysis of where they should really be putting armor became the fundamentals of Operational Science. Jeff and Anthony discuss this idea and what it means today. GET BONUS EPISODES, VIDEO HANGOUTS AND MORE. VISIT: http://patreon.com/wehaveconcerns Get all your sweet We Have Concerns merch by swinging by http://wehaveconcerns.com/shop Hey! If you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to rate/review it on whatever service you use to listen. Here’s the iTunes link: http://bit.ly/wehaveconcerns And here’s the Stitcher link: http://bit.ly/stitcherwhc Jeff on Twitter: http://twitter.com/jeffcannata Anthony on Twitter: http://twitter.com/acarboni Today’s story was sent in by Jonathan Lawson: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abraham_Wald If you’ve seen a story you think belongs on the show, send it to wehaveconcernsshow@gmail.com or leave it on the subreddit:http://reddit.com/r/wehaveconcern

 ***SPOILER ALERT***If you have not seen “Split,” do NOT read this or listen to the accompanying podcast. You have been warned!  ***SPOILER ALERT***  M. Night Shyamalan, so celebrated for his early films like “The Sixth Sense” and “Signs” has essentially reinvented himself in recent years, abandoning big budgets, to work on his own terms for psychological thrillers that could at times almost pass as black comedies. “The Visit” scored with critics and audiences alike and now he continues the trend with “Split”, starring James McAvoy as a man with DID (dissociative identity disorder). It’s all totally new territory for Shyamalan. Right? Not quite. If you’ve seen the film, (and if you haven’t this your last chance, get out of here!) you know the big secret at the heart of “Split”. This is the long awaited continuation of “Unbreakable”, complete with a return of Bruce Willis as David Dunn. Fans of “Unbreakable” have clamored for a sequel virtually since the film’s release in 2000. And while the filmmaker has teased a possible return to the universe at some point, no one anticipated it would happen this way. Talking at length in this exclusive conversation with Josh Horowitz specially for a spoiler-centric “Happy Sad Confused” podcast, Shyamalan reveals a lot—from the origins of “Split” in the original “Unbreakable” script to his plans for the 3rd installment of the story, a film that will bring together David Dunn (Willis), The Horde (James McAvoy) and Mr. Glass (Samuel L. Jackson), a film the director intends to make next. There’s a ton of juicy details in the conversation below. If you’re an “Unbreakable” fan, prepare yourself!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All your life you dream of meeting someone with whom you want to start a family. Meet Navin and Christy,a wonderful Christian couple, who wanted to have children but couldn't. So when they finally decided to adopt a child - it should have all worked out. Right? Not quite. In this episode of Intersection you'll hear about their incredible joy followed by heart-wrenching loss. Navin and Christy share openly and honestly about some hard questions they asked themselves and God. And you'll be encouraged by how they came through this dramatic chapter in their lives.

Your kids have grown and left the nest. Your days of influence in younger generations are over. Right? Not hardly! As Matt Graves explains, the life of a patriarch or matriarch can be very important and rewarding. The post Stage 4: Support It appeared first on Heritage Church.

Cold Calling – it’s unpleasant, ineffective, a waste of time & makes everyone crabby. Right? Not so fast…There’s a growing number of thought leaders who maintain that cold calling in fact DOES work and has a place in sales today. Speaker, partner and lead trainer for eCenter Training, Jeff Goldberg, joins Dan Walker with the scoop in this 10-minute podcast.

Gay men are richer than everyone else, right? After all, they're men, so they automatically earn more than women, and they are less likely to have kids, which of course are the biggest bucks-suck of all time. Plus, just look at all the gay men you know. So, so fabulous. Right? Not so fast, says today's guest.   Ten years ago John Schnieder, 42, and David Auten, 45, found themselves, in many ways, typical of their peers. The Denver financial professionals were gay, young, hot, with solid incomes and a love of partying -- and were deeply in debt.  With combined incomes of $70,000, they realized that clubbing, shopping and travel had landed them $51,000 in credit card debt and living in a basement apartment.  The couple realized they had to make a change -- and over 2.5 years they not only paid off their debt, but bought a condo and started to build their financial future. They also realized that there was a huge need for financial education and support among their gay peers. The pair launched DebtFreeGuys, and wrote The Four Principles of a Debt Free Life and address the unique pressures and challenges gay men face when it comes to their money, including social isolation (hence, overspending on expensive clubs).  In this episode , John shares their story about his and David's come-to-Jesus moment, their take on gay men and money, and their plans to be a unique voice in the personal finance space, speaking to their gay peers. 

by Do you know how to apologize? It sounds so simple. Just say, “I’m sorry.” Right? Not necessarily. Sometimes a proper, sincere apology can be more complicated, more nuanced. So, let me ask again: do you know how to apologize? Lauren Bloom is an attorney, an expert on professional ethics, and an ordained interfaith minister. […] The post Lauren Bloom “Art of the Apology” appeared first on Eye on Books.