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Athletes and coaches spend a lot of time watching their team's performance.  Strengths and weaknesses are sought in order to amplify the former and eliminate the latter.  Close scrutiny is applied to key moments, crucial transitions and pivotal points.  Presenting should be no different.  Cast your mind back though, to the last twenty presentations you have attended and ask yourself how many speakers were recording themselves for later analysis?  I would assert that the answer would be either zero or very close to zero.  Why would that be?  High performance athletes are constantly using video to check on what they are doing.  Why don't high performance leaders, experts, executives, industry influencers, and assorted gurus do the same thing? These days the technology is very good.  A simple video camera and tripod investment is a minor affair.  The camera microphone itself at a certain distance is fine or you can add a shotgun microphone if needed.  You just set it up turn it on and forget about it until the end.  You may have to be careful with the arrangements such that no one in the audience will be in the shot and you need to tell everyone that is the case in order to remove privacy concerns.  Well if it is all this easy why aren't more speakers doing this?  The smarter ones are.  I often coach speakers before major presentations and we always use video.  I can tell them what they are doing that needs improvement, but there is nothing more powerful than having that information pointed out to you and seeing it at the same time.  If it is just you shooting the video yourself and there is no coach review possibility, there is still enough material on the video for you to make improvements in your presentation. How do you review the presentation?  Look at four possibilities for the next time.  What can you delete, add, reduce or amplify?  There may be habits you have that detract from the persuasion power of the message.  Perhaps you are mumbling or umming and ahing.  Confidence sells and to sound confident you must be clear and consistent in your delivery.  Look for tell taLe body language tics that have a negative connotation.  You might be swaying around in a distracting way that competes with what you are saying.  Or you maybe be fidgeting, or striding around the stage showing off to everyone how nervous you are.  All of these habits weaken your message with your audience. Are you engaging the audience with your eye contact?  My Japanese history professor at university would deliver every lecture staring at the very top of the back wall and never engage in any eye contact with the students.  Don't be like that.  Use every second of the presentation to lock eyes with members of your audience for about six seconds, one at a time and in random order.  Are you using congruent gestures during you explanation or no gestures or too many gestures or permanent gestures?  Gestures are there to be points of emphasis, so hold for a maximum of fifteen seconds and then turn them off. Video is also excellent for considering what you might have done, looking for things you could have added to the presentation.  Maybe there was a chance to use a prop or introduce a slide to support a point or call for more audience participation by getting them to raise their hands in response to a question.  I was giving a talk recently on “AI in the Workplace” and I showed two paintings labelled A and B and asked the audience which one was painted by AI.  They had to raise their hands to vote.  This was more interesting than just showing them a slide with a painting done by AI.  Roughly half of the audience went for either A or B.  In fact they were both done by A1 so it was a bit of ruse, but very effective to drive home the point I was making. If you cannot organise a video or if the hosts are not cooperative, then have someone you trust give you feedback.  Don't ask them a broad question such as “how was it?'.  We need to be more specific.  “Did my opening grab the attention of the audience?”,  “Were my main points clear and supported with credible evidence”, “Was I engaging my audience with good quality eye contact throughout?”,  etc.  Give them a checklist before you start so you can guide them in what to look for.  Unless they are a public speaking expert themselves, they won't know how to help you best. In a year, most people don't get that much opportunity to speak in public, so it very hard to get the right frequency to enable improvement.  If you could do the same presentation five times in a row, by the last one you would be on fire, but that hardly ever happens.  This is why the video or expert feedback becomes so useful.  You can review the presentation at your leisure and improve on your professional public speaking capabilities for the next outing

About the Subtitles on YouTubeOn YouTube, I've added live subtitles in simplified and traditional Chinese, as well as English for the latest episode. I also tried adding Japanese subtitles this time. My Japanese is not very good yet, so please forgive any mistakes in the subtitles. If you notice any issues or have suggestions, feel free to leave a comment or email me!关于YouTube上的字幕在YouTube上，我为最新一期添加了简体中文、繁体中文和英文字幕，同时还尝试加入了日文字幕。我的日语还不太好，如果字幕中有错误，请大家多多包涵。如果您发现问题或有任何建议，欢迎通过留言或电子邮件告诉我！YouTubeの字幕についてまた、今回は日本語字幕も追加しました。私の日本語はまだあまり上手ではないので、字幕に誤りがあるかもしれません。間違いがあったら許してください。何かお気づきの点やご意見がありましたら、ぜひコメントやメールでお知らせいただけると幸いです！——本期简介:大家好，欢迎来到新一期的五分钟中文！今天我想介绍一个既有趣又实用的中文学习方法：通过观看中国人到你所在国家旅游的视频来提升中文听力和理解能力。通过熟悉的场景和文化背景，你将能更轻松地理解语言表达和文化差异。如果大家有兴趣，可以去YouTube搜索中国人的旅游视频，最好选择带字幕的，这样更有助于理解。大家不妨试试通过旅行视频来更自然地学中文吧！Summary of This Episode:In this episode, we introduce an effective and fun way to learn Chinese: watching Chinese travel vlogs of Chinese travelers visiting your country. This approach helps improve listening comprehension and enhances understanding of cultural differences. By leveraging familiar scenes and cultural context, you'll find it easier to grasp the language and expressions. We'll share tips on how to get started with this method and recommend useful resources. Tune in to discover how travel vlogs can help you learn Chinese naturally!#LearnChinese #LearnMandarin #IntermediateMandarin #AdvancedMandarin #ChineseLanguageLearning #ChineseListening #ChineseTravelVlogs #ChineseVlog #中级中文 #高级中文 #中文学习 #中文听力 #ChinesePodcast #中文播客 #ChineseTravel发短信给我！ Send me a text!Support the showDue to space constraints, the transcript is not available in the description. However, it's easily accessible on my podcast website, where you will find the transcript under each episode. The web address is https://www.buzzsprout.com/1868166Let me know if you can't find it. If you have any questions, please feel free to email me at TheLoneMandarinTeacher@outlook.com. Please also email me if you need Traditional Chinese transcripts. Have a great day! 如果您喜欢我的播客，您可以通过成为订阅者来支持我。您的支持对我来说是巨大的鼓励。但无论您是否选择捐款，我都很感激有您成为听众。能够每周与您分享几分钟的时间，对我来说是莫大的荣幸。❤️If you enjoy my podcast, you can support me by becoming a subscriber. Your support is a huge encouragement to me. But whether or not you choose to donate, I'm grateful to have you as a listener. It's an honor to share a few minutes with you each week. ❤️

Of Funerals and Families; Part One In 25 parts, edited from the works of FinalStand. Listen and subscribe to the ► Podcast at Connected.. “Victory is neither pointless, fleeting, nor soon forgotten. It is yours.” I have been warned that my Uncle wants me dead. My Aunts want me for; other things." "What do they want?" E asked. It was the whole 'men as a true asset' problem for her. "The whole repository of nefariousness;” Pamela started to explain, but then, "Double Word Score!" Pamela and I exclaimed excitedly then 'high-fived'. Yes, you spiteful Cosmos, I had found my soul-mate and she was a near-octogenarian with a macabre sense of humor; who also had a telepathic ability to know my mind. E looked totally lost in the exchange. "Yes; the whole repository of nefariousness was created to be sterile," Pamela picked up the conversation. "Which makes the very existence of Cáel here very noteworthy; virtually inexplicable," she mused. "What have the labs at Havenstone think of this?" Rachel worried. "I refused to go back in for any more tests," I met her gaze. "But it could be important," E joined in. "I will make it easy on you both; I'm a horrible person. I'm the Head of House Ishara and I elect to not put my fate in the hands of the same people who leaked my very existence to the Illuminati during the first set of tests," I stated. "Which is why I'm here in Chicago burying my Father, in case any of you missed it." "Certainly knowing what is going on is more important than the risk of further exposure," E persisted. She got kudos for sticking to her guns. "Esmeralda, I work for Katrina Love, Head of Executive Services," I responded. "By that I mean I have this nifty little glass table in a corner of her office. Me stressing over my genetics isn't really important. Katrina is on the case and I haven't been out of college for two months yet. If the difference between Havenstone getting in a fight with the Illuminati and keeping the truce is my blood sample, she'll let me know," I added. "As far as Ishara is concerned, Havenstone had an information leak that got a house member killed." "Do you have other family?" E inquired hesitantly. "Blood kin? Not in this country and certainly not anyone I could name," I sighed. "I case you are wondering, there are a grand total of three members on Ishara's roster." "Is the rest of your family safe?" E was trying to sound upbeat. "Safe? Of course they are not safe. They both work for Executive Services, Esmeralda. They were 'Runners' who I inducted into Ishara. They are Amazons of the Host and that means never being safe this side of the cliffs. Friday morning I presented them to our ancestors and they were welcomed as equals; as sisters to those who have the blood of Mycenaeans on their hands," I turned to look out the window. "What was it like?" Tiger Lily inquired. "The induction." "If you are looking for a vision of a stone hall with thousands of war-like Amazons holding me in judgment, you'll be disappointed," I recalled. "I had to create the ceremony from scratch; ash, tears and blood. "I felt strong enough about that instinct I let Desiree slap me until I cried enough tears. With Desiree's knife, I cut myself, they cut themselves and our blood mixed," I finished. "That is not how it is done," Rachel corrected me. "No," I stopped. "It is not how you do it. House Ishara has come back from the void that waits for all those who are dead and have no one living to recall them," I explained. "We are not the other Houses. We are both Love and Oaths and there is a lack of respect for each of those virtues in this World." "I never considered Amazons as overly romantic, but we are true to our oaths," Esmeralda was starting to bask in the openness of the exchange. "I do not doubt the integrity of anyone in this vehicle, except for me," I gave her a weary grin. "The failure of oaths is mine. Ishara was bound by an Oath and has failed in her pledge. You are wrong about the romance and I am sure you have misunderstood my definition. I live for the day when no sons are sent to the cliffs as newborns; Love, Esmeralda. Love." The hush pressed upon us until Tiger Lily pulled up in front of the Hotel Burnham. Rachel, E, Charlotte (from the second GL) and I went in. I wave the others back as I went to the desk. Rachel and Charlotte had grey duffel bags with 'stuff' inside. E had my minimal kit. "Cáel Nyilas with Havenstone," I introduced myself. Yes, I was in 'prison' gear. "Director Nyilas; welcome to the Burnham," he recovered quickly. "Which rooms do you wish to use?" Thank you, Helena, no I'm a damn Director. He twisted the screen so I could see the list. Eleven doubles and a Lakeview Executive Suite with two adjoining Deluxe Suites. "We'll use those," I indicated the Executive/Deluxe/Deluxe. "Very good, Sir," he nodded. "Will you be ordering room service? I'm afraid the Atwood restaurant has closed for the evening." "Sounds like a plan," I looked at his name tag, "Steve, or do you prefer Mr. McCabe?" "Steve will do fine, Director;” Steve started. "I will make it easy on you Steve," I sighed. "Call me Cáel. All this Director crap is for the benefit of people I barely know. I am here, in my hometown, to bury my Father; who was murdered yesterday." Steve paled. "The FBI gave me these spiffy duds. If any law enforcement shows up asking for me, give me a ring first." "Nyilas; from Burnham? I read about that," Steve seemed bemused. "The day shift Assistant Manager is from Burnham too." How wonderful, I thought sarcastically. Steven sensed my waning interest. "Your keycards, Sir; Cáel and my sympathy for your loss." "Steve, never miss a chance to tell your loved ones how you feel," I took the cards. "That is my biggest regret with my Dad. I didn't think about it the last time we talked." Steve gave a final nod. I rejoined my group and headed for the elevator. The rest was a tired blur. The rest of the group showed up, including Pamela. I called Nicole to tell her the situation then called Timothy despite the late hour to make sure he was okay. Timothy informed me that two 'psycho-chicks' stopped by as a kind of 'meet and greet'. I hit the small hotel fitness center with Mona, the fourth member of Rachel's team. It helped. What helped more was the constant reminder that I worked with smart people. Mona's mother was dead as well, killed on an undisclosed mission with the SD when she was ten. She could understand my sense of grief and confusion. We didn't cry and hug. It wasn't something she could do with a man. Give a decade, or two and she might come around. Instead, "Thank you for Constanza," Mona said quietly to me as we exited the center. "I measure a person's life in the lives we save; as well as the ones we take," I enlightened her. Before that moment, I didn't really consider killing people to be all that praiseworthy an endeavor. Today I had been in a situation where my life had been in immediate danger. I was glad the other guy ended up dead. Since I was prepared to keep acting stupidly, I was grateful for those who would murder people so that I could remain both noble of purpose and alive. "She is close to me; she helped me grow up after Mom was gone," Mona opened up a tiny bit. "Aren't you a bit angry with me?" I asked. "Initially, I was very angry. Then I heard your words and I knew you spoke the truth of the matter," Mona exhaled. "She should have died. She deserved death for what she said." "No one;” I started to comfort Mona. "For a member of a Faith that exults in the harshness of martial conflict, you spend an inordinate amount of energy struggling to keep people alive," Mona noted. "I'm glad I helped deal with those Latin Kings now. It was a mission worth doing." "What?" I stumbled. "Didn't Buffy tell you?" Mona regarded me. She smirked. "Yeah, we hunted them down late Sunday night and into early Monday morning. I doubt the few who escaped will ever be back." "Why haven't I; anybody heard about this?" I worried. Mona looked at me somewhat perplexed. "Cáel of Ishara, we always take the bodies of murder victims, cut them up, place them in large drums of acid and ship them to Canada," Mona informed me. "Ah; thanks for telling me that. Let's both agree to not let Buffy know that I know, okay?" I requested. "She'll get an inordinate thrill thinking she knows something I don't." "As you wish, Cáel of Ishara," Mona nodded gravely.  (Tuesday Morning) Sexual addiction is somewhat like military service. It requires you to be alert to your surroundings, think on your feet, follow procedures and; most crucial to me; shows you how to remain functional with minimal sleep. In this case, five hours sufficed to clear out my cobwebs and make me incredibly horny. All of that was despite the layers of upsetting news being placed before me. Executive Services had gone over the feed from the four SD members. Inadvertently, Dad had fought on the 'right' side. The team leader died first. Her back-up put two men in the grave and wounded a third before they tossed a grenade on her. I looked at Charlotte as she gave me the news. We both had a 'what the' expression on our faces. Grenade? I kept doing my calisthenics. The second two-Amazon group killed three attackers on their side of the building then charged the back door. I wondered if Mom's Garden Dragon was okay. It was like a Garden Gnome, except it was a Dragon. Mom was odd that way. The attacking group had blown the front door and entered the first floor. The Amazons in the back decided to shoot out the lock instead. While transiting the kitchen moving forward, the second group took fire; from a Zastava M 21. I was confused. "It is a modern Serbian weapon," Charlotte filled in the blanks. "Dad was killed by Serbians?" I muttered. "No," Charlotte sighed. "No he wasn't." Another look from me as I started my standing push-ups. "That team member was wounded. The shooter was taken down by both of our teammates. At this point, three other attackers moved from your front room to the dining room, pinning our team down. That was when your father broke cover and assaulted the attackers. He had this large lamp and cracked it over the right shoulder of the closest man," Charlotte stated. I knew that light fixture Charlotte was talking about. It was a floor lamp, nearly two meters tall, made of glass and bronze. My physique was from my Father; broad shoulders and powerful arms. That 'large lamp' weighed over 30 kg and, powered by my father's upper body strength, I was betting the guy who was on the receiving end had have some of his bones snapped. "The man screamed in Bulgarian, his two companions turned to see what was happening and the Amazons advanced by fire toward your father," Charlotte continued. "Your father swung again," she looked at me, "connecting with the man's chest. In response, the other two shot him three times. He fell. The second team pressed forward, killing the man your Father wounded and wounding another. The last unhurt Amazon was killed trying to get to your Father while the survivor was concussed by the use of a second grenade. We don't have the video of what happened in the interim. When the last Amazon began moving again, the two remaining attackers had dragged your father out the front door. She pursued and fired. She wounded the undamaged attacker; and one of her bullets ended your Father's life. She was wounded in this last exchange of fire. The two men helped each other to a vehicle and left." I kept working out as I made an acceptable collage of my misery. "Does she know?" I whispered. "Does she; the Amazon? Her name is Sabina. I don't think she's been informed yet," Charlotte answered. "Unless it becomes necessary, don't tell her that her bullet killed my Father," I sighed. "The only thing that is important to me; to Ishara; is that she gave her all as did her sisters. My Father was killed by the men who first shot him. Had they escaped with my Father, they weren't taking him to a hospital, so he was as good as dead anyway. That is all that matters." "Yes Ishara," Charlotte responded with quiet reverence. Knowing nothing of Security Detail's procedure and tradition, I had tossed out an excuse to spare a valiant woman a terrible piece of news. Charlotte's demeanor suggested to me that it would be a kindness conveyed. A few minutes later, Rachel and Tiger Lily came in from their suite. Mona had been my guardian while I slept so she slept now. This was our signal to shower and put on some clothes before the group went downstairs for breakfast. Pamela presented herself as I was getting dressed. Esmeralda's arrival signaled our migration to the ground floor Atwood restaurant. As everyone glided into the elevator, I had a nostalgic moment for Odette. A normal, non-lethal, happy young lady. This all-encompassing seriousness around me was crimping my efforts to find the silver lining in this personal calamity. Ten seconds after exiting the elevator, Nicole angled toward us then we proceeded to breakfast. It took a little jockeying and refereeing by me to get the seating arrangements set. Nicole was on my left then Pamela. Rachel and E were on my right. Charlotte and Tiger Lily were across from me as orders were taken. "How are you holding up, Cáel?" Nicole put a hand on my lap. I had no immediate reply. "Lonely. Sad. Alone. Bereft of anger; it is pointless. I want to scream, rage, tear things up, throw things across the room and hear them shatter; but not really," I confessed. Suddenly, a strange essence infused my core. "No, that's wrong. I am not alone. We have suffered more, lived through worse and never wavered even in the face of death," I said in a ghostly whisper. That was really the last thing I wanted to say. Its origin was from an enigmatic corner of my mind I was resisting venturing into. 'Taking oneself to the cliffs' made a whole lot more sense suddenly. The Amazon prepared her daughters and granddaughters for her absence. She volunteered to make that trek. In her heart, she called out to her Ancestors to prepare them to accompany her on that final journey. That all sounded like comfortable spiritual mumbo-jumbo, safely quoted by a rational man under duress. The abyssal rift in that psycho-babble, makeshift patch over my emotional pain was I felt Vranus and Ishara standing at my shoulders. Vranus because his seemingly endless quest was finally resolved and he and his descendants would at last be welcomed into the halls of their kin. With me, he had succeeded and brought his people home. There was still the matter of the rest; the three sons of Arinniti and the elder warrior. Holy Crap; they were still out there, waiting to be shown the path home. My 'Evenly Holier Crap' moment was feeling the weight of the eyes of Ishara upon me. Not Ishara, the matron goddess of this; my House, but that ancient Amazon who had surrendered her personal name to oblivion to give her followers a sense of unity. No female was solely 'her' daughter; all the women of the house were equal in birth and station. It was that Ishara who stood at my shoulder and, beyond some perverse desire to look behind me to see how sexy she was, I felt I had her; not approval; her mandate. We had to be held to our oaths and would die to a woman (and man) for them. We were to give the Host a second chance to make things right. There would be no retreat. It was not in the Amazon psyche to fight the relentless, remorseless and bloody battle; to risk everything on victory with no thought of failure. It was not something guys were accustomed to, but had been the doom of men down through the ages. Whether too romantic, too stubborn, or too bound to our brother's in arms, men had embraced hopeless causes before; mostly perishing without fanfare yet with the exceptional impossible victory to give us hope. From time immemorial, male kin of the flesh and spirit had piled their corpses one upon the other, refusing the verdict of combat for the sake of brotherhood and every imaginable ideal. It was hardly a trait worth sharing with the sisters. They would understand the pieces; not the result. My lack of political ability would not be disability. I simply had to learn to fight; a lot better than I did at that moment. The echoes of this message inside my head, the chilled air that filled my lungs and balance restored to my heart was bizarrely unfrightening. It would be an affirmation of the 'first directive' oaths all the houses had sworn. It wasn't my place to raise all the 'Runners', or even a single one. It was my duty to initiate the 'Worthy', no matter their number. My actions were mine. I would not shame the other houses. I would not consider their prestige at all. It was not my place in the same way it was not their place to tell me what I could and couldn't do. It was a divine 'Go get 'em' and it felt pretty, freaking awesome. "Cáel, are you okay?" Nicole asked in a worried tone. She squeezed my thigh. I looked down at my hands. I was okay. "Nicole, I have the blood of Ahhiyawa champions on my hands. I feel it's sticky, sickening ichor and smell the copper-laden, metallic odor," I smiled. "I think I'm going to be just fine." "Who?" Nicole was even more concerned. "Someone who screwed with me a long, long time ago. They are all dead, but don't worry about the bodies showing up to bother anyone," I grinned. All the full-blooded Amazons had been very still. The word 'Ahhiyawa' appeared to scare them even more than my haunting actions. To the Amazons, the Ahhiyawa were the Mycenaeans in the time of the Iliad. The problem seemed to be that I had never heard any member of the Host use that term and I was suddenly curious as to why. "You seemed to have went away for a few seconds," Nicole joked lightly. "You do appear better rested, which is good. What is on the agenda for today?" "Get my Father's body, prepare for his cremation, arrange for the last Roman Catholic Church we attended to send somebody to the service and prepare my parent's plot," I ran down. "I imagine the police and feds will want to contact me again," I piled it on. "I want to see my home if the forensic guys let me. What do you think will be aimed at me?" "We'll check up on any family attorney you may have had along with probating your father's Will, if he had one," Nicole assured me. "As for the authorities, let's see what kind of warrants they are asking for before we move beyond a 'denial' defense." "Denial, as in me claiming I didn't do anything because, ya know, I didn't do anything," I gave her a sleepy smile. "How about we eat first?" We ordered, drank our coffee, tea and juices while remaining largely non-communicative. It wasn't until the food began arriving did I realize I'd 'misplaced' Pamela once more. As I tore into a big slab of ham, I looked over my surroundings for the first time. I gave myself a mental pat on the back when I spotted Pamela then the 'big picture' kicked me in the nuts. Pamela was dressed as a server, coasting about the room, filling drinks, getting appetizer and performing the tedious little chores that waiters and waitresses had to pull off flawlessly. The other wait-staff noticed Pamela, but since she was making their jobs easier and not taking their gratuities, they ignored her. They probably thought she was some industry expert. The plates were being cleared away when Pamela returned, back in normal clothing. She dumped a pile of ID's on the table. Nicole picked them up. "Chicago PD; Organized Crime Taskforce," Nicole read off then glanced to Pamela. "ATF, Homeland Security, FBI, FBI, Chicago PD; Homicide, Federal Marshall and Federal Marshall." "What?" Pamela said between bites of her veggie omelet. "I took their identification, not their wallets. Do you want me to go back for those too; and their keys?" "No. We have risked Mr. Nyilas' freedom enough for one meal," Nicole shot back. She took Tiger Lily's empty plate, dumped the ID's on it then covered the pile with her handkerchief. "Hello," this officious young lady greeted us. I'd been distracted by Nicole's malfeasance so I missed the hotel's new Assistant Manager's approach. It was turning out to be a great morning for visitations from my past. This ghost was much younger than the last ones. Our eyes met. It was easy to see that I was the man in charge being the only man at the table. "Director Nyilas, I hope everything is going well for you and your staff this morning," she smiled. "I would also like to convey the Hotel Burnham's condolences at the passing of your father. I too was born and raised in Burnham." I already knew where she'd lived most of her life. Most critically, I very strongly recalled where she'd gone to school; all 12 grades plus K. "Cameron Sanders," I stood and extended my hand across the table. "You look familiar." Of course she looked familiar. Cameron had publically ground my soul into the grit that ants stepped upon. Her verbal rejection had been a pivotal moment in my life. After that day, I had taken responsibility for my life both anatomically and academically. Recall how I had said I was once a 'nobody'. Here was living proof. Cameron and I had gone to the same schools from Kindergarten through our senior years. We'd even shared classes and it wasn't like I could be confused with all the other 'Cáels' we'd gone to school with; because there weren't any. The same goes for 'Nyilas'. I'd been shifting the boner in my pants for three solid years because of Cameron. She had been hot in high school and she was even better looking now; Brooke hot. For a second, my confidence wavered. In that heartbeat, I realized she was just another woman and I was no longer that guy. "Where you an upperclassman at Thornton Fractional North High School?" she queried. "Hmm; do you recall Jenny Forrester?" I countered. Cameron knew her African-American rival, no doubt. The tweak in her smile said as much. "I'm going out on a limb; you look like a DePaul girl." Cameron's eyes twinkled. Her eyes flitted down to where her class ring normally held court. She had taken it off for work neutrality. "How did you guess?" Cameron tilted her hip suggestively. Sex. "So I'm right?" I reposed. I had 'guessed' right because Cameron crowed about her decision to go to DePaul over all her other offers. "I have some family business to take care of, Cameron," I nodded. "Can we catch up later today and figure out where we've intersected before this morning?" Translation: I'm going to screw you. Not 'I want to', but 'I will'. I could normally figure out a woman in an evening. I had a three year backlog of data on poor Cameron. My Pivotal Goddess was an 'upfront' girl. Her façade was bravado backed by the fear of not measuring up; not being good enough. My mistake in High School was approaching her, hat in hand. Cameron felt best when someone took the tough choices away from her. If she didn't lead, she couldn't fail by her way of thinking. Dad had stood by me that night when he came home from work. I was a broken wreck of a teenage boy. Dad hadn't told me to toughen up and he hadn't been sympathetic. All he wanted to know was what I was going to do about it. What was 'I' going to do, as if I could be the master of my own fate. That was my Dad. The next day I started working out, eating better and taking better care of myself. He was dead; still dead yet my feelings over that had evolved. He was with my ancestors now, waiting for me and my sons and daughters. Looking at it that way, he wasn't really gone at all. "I'll see what can be done," Cameron smiled. I was going to eat her up. "Oh yeah, this plate was mistakenly delivered to my table," I indicated Pamela's illegal haul. "Could you see that it gets where it needs to go after we are gone?" Cameron shot me a sultry smile without even giving her task a casual glance. A hideous tip (kudos to Odette) was added to our over-priced bill and the ladies and I retired to our rooms. It was routine heading to our room. Mona waved us to silence. Then the 'bug hunt' began. Like every Amazon persecution of opposing 'life forms', they didn't play fair. The Amazons had placed electronic surveillance in the room before they left so when unwelcomed guests showed up while we ate and Mona 'slept' we could watch where they placed their goodies in our rooms. This was not a matter of throwing a fit and tossing the electronic devices down the garbage disposal. Oh no, not in Amazon battle lore. They found out what frequency your device was broadcasting on and backtracked it. According to Tiger Lily you can use a source point and a handheld device to triangulate the receiver. Then the fun begins. First, keep the original signal going. Put a subroutine of; oh, all kinds of credit card fraud in this case with the video file then call the appropriate law enforcement agency to bust the place. The subroutine would have no point of origin, so the Amazons would be safe. The spying agency would have a headache on their hands. Credit card fraud would require them to confiscate all the equipment because the threat posed was real, even if the tip was now suspect. This was the Amazon equivalent of fixating the enemy at one point; surveillance; while making their real move on another; the funeral. The average Amazon funeral was a private affair. My Security Detail was modifying plans for an Amazon dignitary's attendance of another Society member's funerary rites. Halfway through the deception plan, Special Agents Brock and John showed up at our door. With two law firms (Pratt's and Nicole's) dancing on their foreheads, they were being polite today and inviting me down to be questioned. I asked for Detective Lisa and Investigator Horace to be there. One: I didn't dictate who investigated me. Two: they were under Internal Affairs review. I agreed with 'one'; I would say 'nothing' to any number of highly qualified law enforcement operatives. I might give answers to the two I had mentioned. 'Two' was none of my affair. They could hope for some answers when they chose the review would be over. I was more than happy spending a lifetime not talking to them. Legalize was tossed around to the point Nicole yawned, pointed out none of them were attorney's with the United States District Court of the Northern District of Illinois; damn, that's some letterhead, and they could make no deals, grant no immunities, on their own. There was no talking to be done except for the ass-reaming the Court of Appeals was going to give both the Federal attorney who applied for the surveillance warrant and the judge who signed it. Low and behold, phones began ringing. As a patrol unit was making a raid on a room three floors down, a series of shots rang out. A gun battle ensued between the three armed men in the room, the two patrolmen (women actually) and the entire misfortunate event was caught on NBC Channel Five news. Occasionally I forget I work for fundamentally viciously sick fucks. My 'team' had sent the cops and the news crew to the spot and even supplied the ignorant housekeeper with the room card-key for the cops to break in with; a hotel room is not a private dwelling. Cops break in, do their 'freeze, we are the police' thing, but before the three feds in the room could reply, 'their' computer audio equipment let off a sound of bullets firing and ricochets echoing across the room. Nature took its course after that. The feds drew and both sides began shooting. No one died, but one ATF guy was going off to surgery. They would have all earned Purple Hearts if they had been in the military and a commendation no matter what; had two law enforcement agencies not shot each other up. The chase was on for the news crew who was desperately trying to get their station to show the footage before the feds grabbed the memory cards. Despite having had no part in that fiasco, Nicole immediately clued in that the moment our two feds ran off to help their comrades it was our time to leave. Did we go to the vehicles we came in? No. That would have exhibited a lack of paranoia my guardians would have found appalling. Two new car waited a block away. Had I been better at this game, I would have noticed the lack of functioning traffic cameras around us. Instead, I went begging to the local diocese of the Catholic Church. I plead my case. Mom and Dad were devout, raised me to be a devout Catholic yet when my Mother died, my father had never gotten over the trauma and me, being a young man, hadn't explored my spirituality yet; but I promised I'd get right on it when I returned to New York. The priest who handled the end of life stuff for the Church was sympathetic. He gave me the name of a local priest near my home I could talk to on my return. He also told me that he'd received a moving letter from a nun in Uganda about a deeply spiritual moment she had shared with me years ago, so he was onboard with giving my Dad a Catholic send-off. I wasn't sure if that was a sign to never touch a wannabe Nun again, or a reminder that nun's gave incredibly positive feedback on their sexual misadventures. I went with the latter. A few more calls, the choosing of the proper crematorium and I was through with the first part of that ordeal. Next came the funeral notification and invites. The Union would send some of Dad's closest co-workers and several neighbors said they'd show up as well. Flowers, clothes, wake; well, it couldn't be in my family home. The forensic team was gone and it was free for me to wander through, but the bullet holes and blood might put a damper on the ambience. In the midst of my worries, I got a call. A polite man named Winchell Sokolowsky offered me the Marshal Fields Jr. Mansion for my personal use. If there is any doubt, Chicago is Not the city of good Samaritans, the overly polite, or even the casually kind. Chicagoans pride themselves on being tough. We have plenty of good people who help out, volunteer and try to make life easier for their fellow man. That does not encompass giving a random stranger use of a multi-million dollar mansion. If I hadn't already been living in fantasy land, I'd have been busy figuring out which one of my few male friends was pulling this prank of on me, but no. "Can I inquire about the source of this largesse, Mr. Sokolowsky? Take in mind the incredible likelihood of a government agency most foul listening in," I cautioned him. "A family friend," he responded with an amused snort. Yeah, cause my Father's funeral was all chuckles for me. Since crab-women weren't likely to know owners of mansions, this had to be my aunts. Woot. "Thank you sir. My security people will be over to sweep the place before the city, state, or federal governments can crank out another search warrant. Thank you again." "That is not unexpected," Sokolowsky replied. "Until then." Rachel looked at me as if I'd done something absurd. She may have been right. "Did you just accept shelter from an individual we do not know; except that he is certainly part of the Protocols?" she stared at me. "Come on now," I chastised her. "It's for a funerary wake. I'm not taking three hundred of the lads out for a stroll, chasing savages up the Little Big Horn, or an Irishman deciding that Oliver Cromwell is a man of his word." I leaned in and winked to Rachel. "Besides Charlie; I got an angle." Pamela, who just happened to be walking by, gave me another high-five. Rachel was really learning to hate/dread those moments of synergy between Pamela and I. "I am not allowed to kill you and I am afraid I can't kill Pamela, but please don't think I don't want to do both," Rachel ratcheted up her displeasure. "Torn into itsy-bitsy pieces;” Pamela started. "And buried alive!" I finished. Another high-five. "You two are both insane," Rachel despaired. "That's the spirit," Pamela and my comeback to Rachel was in synch once again. To prove I wasn't heartless, I hugged Rachel. She froze, arms at her side, caught between warring impulses. I maneuvered her arms around until her hands rested on the back of my hips then rested mine on the small of her back. "Rachel, I cannot go back to a safe, faceless existence," I whispered as I planted tender kisses on her forehead. "To do so would be a betrayal of; me; Ishara." Rachel let go of her emotions and rested her head against my shoulder. "Why couldn't I be tasked to do something sane; like fight drug cartels, Maoist insurgence, or corporate hit squads in the Amazon?" she sighed. I moved my hands to her ass and gave them a nice fondle making sure to slowly grind her waist against my hips. Humping her would have been a mistake. That was sexual. I was giving her a bit of physical appreciation and nothing more. Rachel tilted her head up, I brought mine down until we were nose to nose. "Promise me you will try to stay alive, Cáel," she sounded almost mournful. "I will make a deal with you," I stated. "If I make it back to New York alive, you will consent to have sex with me." Rachel was confused, suspicious yet aroused. "None of this 'one hour' in some dormitory, or nunnery cell. I want everything; a light meal, some quality touching time and a minimum of two rounds of orgasmic sex." "Ah; not a scratch," Rachel counter-offered. I nodded, kissed her nose and she felt as if she'd won something. Rachel got ready to take us to our next stop. Pamela slipped past me. "Like shooting fish in a barrel," she whispered. I had never used that term out loud before. "That's what I would say," she clarified. She was my evil psychic twin grandmother. It was through a tireless group effort that I made it back to the Hotel Burnham at 4 p.m. Cameron made a show of being busy when I first came back. I was willing to be patient. While she puttered around, I flirted with the desk clerk and one of the baggage attendants; pale skin, blonde hair with freckles and light brown skin, black hair in a Nubian weave. This was the 'professional' lure. By presenting myself as a 'Man's Man' and garnering female adoration, I was clearly not (yet) that into her. The pressure was on her and Cameron didn't like pressure because pressure equated to the possibility of failure. Her advantages which were obvious to every other observer were not certainties to her. Contest time. "Director Cáel Nyilas," Cameron interrupted my joke to the two ladies, "I'm finished up for the day." I gave a quick smile to the women I was about to leave then turned on my personal demon. "Should I wait in the lounge until you change?" "No," I waved off her objections. "You can come up to my suite and then we can go to your domicile for you to change for a night out." Quick visual clue update: she lived at home with her parents yet dated enough that it wouldn't be awkward. It also showed me that she was uncomfortable about going to my room. She wasn't so enchanted she would do something stupid. I had the answer to that. I had made it a public declaration. Not only did my hovering troop had the news, so did her front desk. Nothing bad could happen to her if everyone knew where she was; right? On the elevator ride up it was just me, Cameron, Pamela and Esmeralda. The rest travelled on ahead. She took one rear corner so I took the other. I then let my leather-soled shoes slide down the carpet, lowering my overall height compared to Cameron. At some point, I began back-spinning my feet, pretending to be on the edge of falling on my ass. I smiled at Cameron and her eyes sparkled at the vaudevillian gesture. Know your prey and I knew way more about Cameron than was healthy for any girl. For instance, she loved Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton; more of a Keaton girl. She giggled then came to my rescue. She was wrapping me up in her arms while mine stayed safely away. "You are a bit of a joker," she teased me. "Your beautiful smile makes all that effort worthwhile," I truthfully pledged to Cameron. She sighed so contentedly. Behind her back, Pamela was loading a two-barreled hunting device, aiming at some surface-based, above ground structure with an open top and gave it both barrels while avoiding the imaginary back-splash. 'Looks like herring for dinner,' she mouthed with a wicked grin. Esmeralda was soaking it in. Hadn't I pounced on Rachel a few hours earlier? I was definitely hooking Cameron and reeling her in for some sexual deviant purpose; and Pamela was mocking the whole situation. E turned and faced the doors. "You seem like a really nice guy," Cameron murmured. "I mean that in a good way." "I can't see you as any way, but truthful and kind," I met her cherished countenance. "I imagine even harsh lessons are difficult for you to deliver." There; she had one last chance to figure out the poor schlub she'd crushed at the start of our senior year was me. "Being a leader can be very tough," she moped as she pressed into me. My mumbled offerings of affection and her savage reprisal had never registered with her. I was going to eat her alive. "How about I take care of you tonight?" I requested. She hesitated, not out of fear, but confusion. "Completely relax and I'll make the decisions for this one night. Your mind will be free to enjoy and discard at your pleasure." On most levels, Cameron was seeing this as a date. She was a 'dating' girl. She didn't give up the goodies until date three, if I was exceptionally good; date four, or five otherwise. I was about to dispose of that with a clever case of role reversal. My two staffers vanished as I entered my lakeside executive suite. A splendid view I thought I'd never be able to afford the last day; The 28th of December. I had enough money for a flight and a date picking me up at the airport. Bolingbrook had an inordinate amount of students stay the holidays and, by tradition, the graduating class hosted a New Year's Eve party for those students and the staff. I had told Dad about Havenstone and my infinitesimal chances of that kind of job. That was it. He patted me on the shoulder. There was no pressure to come back to Burnham after graduation if I didn't have a job lined up. It was my home if I needed it. So much was unspoken between us. I could tell he was proud; college; good grades; popular; happy. I shouldn't have taken for granted we'd get a chance to talk later. Back to the joy at hand. "So, what's it like working with your Dad?" I dropped into our causal conversation. I was in the bedroom, door open; really? Why do they put doors on those things? The 'Daddy' question could be taken two ways and I trusted Cameron to take it the worse way; and to be pissed. "My Father didn't get me the job here!" Cameron stormed in and insisted with a nice spirited mare stomp of the foot as emphasis. I 'just happened' to be naked, half turned away and a nice, highly suggestive pair of men's underwear in my hands. "What do you mean?" I was clearly confused. I turned a bit more toward her. Now she could almost see everything. "You; you have scars all over your body," she moaned. "I am a warrior, Cameron. This is the kind of man I am," I gave her a fierce, dominating gaze. "I fight for what I want and I brutally defend that which is mine. Who did you think I was?" Had Cameron been a fighter, that would have been the point she left the room. She was all up-front, bravado and a superior façade over an insecure, parentally driven trophy for their mantel place. My anger faded. It wasn't her fault I couldn't read her signs four years ago. I was still going to fuck her to the afterlife and back, but this time I'd be doing it as an informative journey. "I don't know anymore," Cameron tried to rally some sort of coherent rampart. "Come here," I beckoned her with one hand (the one without the underwear). Cameron shook her head. "Cameron, please believe me, there are things my staff would let me get away with; rape is not one of them. I won't touch you anywhere unless you give me permission." If you are a girl in the room at this point, you are toast. I just made it safe to touch my naked body. Sure, you have clothes on; for now, but not for long. Why? Women desire sex about as much as men do. Unless you are a vapid fashion model with substance abuse issues, men with non-disfiguring scars are an aphrodisiac. Add to that a hard-forged physique and men, sex is there for the taking. "I; uh;” she kept taking baby-steps forward. "I; Pam; Pamela is it?" "Yo," Pamela answered in a bored manner, knife in hand, then, "Whoa now!" she pointed her knife at my equipment. "Sheath that, young man. Put it under wraps right now." "I'm grown man, Pamela," I griped. I also put on my underwear. "Pluck the freaking pebble out of my hand, bitch, and then I'll call you an adult," Pamela sneered. Looking to Cameron, "Anything else Miss?" "No, thank you; no, wait. What do you do for Mr. Nyilas?" Cameron asked. "I'm his psychic medium," was Pamela's sage reply. That supernatural bogusness made Cameron happy. It shouldn't have. "Yeah, I kill his enemies then interrogate their souls," Pamela added with a nod. "It is highly rewarding work." Cameron's mouth gaped. "How about I shut the door and give you two kids some privacy." "What does she really do?" Cameron whispered to me. Part of me wanted to say 'she told you'. "She's my masseuse," I lied. I started putting my pants on (forgetting my socks) then fell/sat on the bed. Cameron came to my bedside. I rolled on my back and highly exaggerated the effort it took to pull them up. Cameron began giggling. "Hey, these are my 'skinny' slacks. I wouldn't laugh at you if our positions were switched." "Really?" she teased me. I laughed and she laughed along. "Cameron, think about it. I'm shirtless and definitely bra-less. I'm pretty sure I'd be too distracted by a multitude of your other assets to snicker," I countered. Cameron blushed and smiled. Ah, the visual image in Cameron's head was her, with jeans, racy panties and nothing else on while I hovered over her, relishing her attempts to conceal her charms. I shuffled back on the bed and resumed pulling my slacks up. Cameron followed, right into the danger zone. "Wait;” she put a hand on my abdomen. "What caused that scar?" So I told her. Okay, I gave her an abridged version of the truth. Fine, I lied like a big dog. I had the amazing habit of stumbling across women in need of saving. I bled for their virtue and honor, racked with intense pain before a violent victory was seized by my masculine hands. I was sure that Pamela and Rachel were hiding just outside the door, retching into waste baskets over the layers upon layers of my tripe. Around wound twelve, I was sure if I had asked Cameron to wear little lamb ears and a bell around her neck, she would have; had one been handy. To be fair, I wasn't fighting off legions of Green Beret. I was doing one better. I was using thinly-veiled caricatures of her High School enemies and nemeses. I was revealing their wickedness and pummeling them for their evil ways. There is a precious look a woman has when she miraculously discovers she is going to have the intercourse she's wanted yet somehow not recognized that need for until that moment. Cameron had that look, straddling me, skirt hiked up to her waist and vulva riding my cock (two layers intervening). We were out of wounds. "The rest are covered up," I explained in a predatory voice. Yes, Cameron was going to have sex and she had no control of events whatsoever and I hadn't even laid a hand on her yet. "Where?" she was suddenly baffled. "Pants," I kept it short and to the point. Cameron looked over her shoulder She reluctantly started to dismount so she could get to them so I made my move. I grabbed her hips in mid-dismount and rotated her around to reverse-cowgirl. Cameron began tugging off my pants with my legs raised high. My stomach crunches kicked in and I leveraged my torso up as well. I deftly moved her skirt up and went straight to the ass massage. Cameron's head shot around, eyes fearful. I had broken my word to not touch her without permission. Yes, I had lied to a girl; Now, I kissed her right on the lips, expertly delivered a delving French kiss and moved one hand to her right breast for an aggressive fondle. Cameron was really getting into it. Her nipples were highly sensitive. Her ass was humping like an over-eager sorority girl pole-dancing on Amateur Night. On cue, Cameron broke free and flew off the bed. "What; you; I thought we were going out?" she whined. She was horny as hell and didn't want to be held accountable at it. "Why are you running away?" I reclined back, solely in my underwear now. I was using my 'I'm disappointed in you' voice. Yes, I was 'guilting' a girl into having sex. Duh. I would never coerce a woman, or take one not in her right mind; that's using forces beyond her control. Guilt? Guilt has a foundation squarely in a woman's mind, just like humor, romance, common interests (feigned or not) and horniness. Girls can control guilt just like any other psychological trigger. It is called being shameless and I ought to know. Remember guys, it cuts both ways. Don't think so? You've had a girlfriend three whole months to the point she's staying over a night or two a week. One night, after your (hopefully) second round, you both discover it is that time of the month. 'Babe (or whatever pet name she has saddled you with), can you run to the store and get me some tampons and pads?' That, by the way, was not a question. She, for hygiene reasons, can't put her clothes on and go out herself. So, you go out to the Quick-Mart at 2 a.m. praying to God that none of your buddies are on a late night beer run and see you with your; stuff. You are not doing this for sex. She's not feeling 100% at the moment. Why are you? Guilt. She was at your place, making your Baloney Pony happy and this happened. You could send her out to the store. Not only is she not the only woman out there, many women understand guys getting freaked out about menstrual products. No, you feel guilty and risk the ridicule of your peers because it is your fault and you are not a dick-wad. And why did she ask you to do something that has nothing to do with you? Women are equally aware that guilt works, Baby. Back to our tale; "I'm not running away," sounded empty coming out of her mouth. "You said; touching." "I think you gave that option up when you crawled on top of me," I leered. "I clearly want to be with you, Cameron. You have given every indication you want to be with me, so I ask you again, why are you suddenly running away?" I kept after her. "I don't want to have sex; right now," again, she sounded weak. "Whatever happens, I go back to New York in two days," I met her shaky gaze. "You can set a time table if you like. The actuality of my life is relentless. I have things to get back to. If you are going to go, then go. I'll head out alone tonight, get a few drinks, come back early and grab some shut-eye," I shrugged. I went searching for my pants. See, she wasn't some random fuck. I wasn't leaving to replace her; making her a failure. I was hemming her in. I had the timeline. I had made my desires clear. There was no negotiation so while she appeared to have choices, she didn't and she knew it. For a girl who had spent so much effort working hard to not disappoint the main masculine figure in her life there was only one thing to do. "I don't want you to think I ever do anything like this," she propped up her morals while stutter-stepping back to the bed. "I feel I have a connection with you." Ah; the 'I have a connection with you' excuse. It would have been so appropriate if she actually remembered me. I pulled her onto the bed, went through the obligatory trying to push me off then we were back to the kissing and humping. Cameron turned out to be a 'use me' girl. That does Not mean abuse, it means she gets off being a responder to her partner's sexual directions. Caress her cheek, jaw and throat and she'd cup my chin, or massage my chest. Cameron was smart and a quick-learner. Her problem was a lack of a sense of adventure and an aversion to taking the lead. With the phantom applause of a hundred other male 'losers' who went to Fractional North High School, I ‘did' the queen who had been beyond us all only four years ago. The erotic twist to all that was with every sense of triumph and pleasure, Cameron mimicked me. Certainly we were both having a memorable time. I had to touch, lick, knead, and fondle every inch of Cameron's body. We both explored our nipple fetish, sixty-nined and engaged in some anal play; no penetration. I completed my first sojourn with the removal of the condom and the blowjob that had been the fantasy of countless hours in my home's upstairs bathroom. Cameron didn't just swallow; she savored and looked like she wanted more. Normally I cuddle beside my partner post-coitus. With Cameron, I lay on top of her at eye level. I put enough weight on her to let her feel pinned without real discomfort. "I have a confession," I gave her a sweaty-faced grin. "What?" she asked then gave me a peck on the lips. "We went to school together; same grade and everything," I enlightened her. "We even talked once." Cameron didn't know what to make of that. "I'll put that in perspective though. Do you believe that if you do something you do your best? Do you believe in craftsmanship?" "Cáel, you are scaring me," Cameron frowned. "Fifteen seconds and you can go," I conveyed with as much calm as I could. "Answer my question." "Okay; yes, I believe in doing your best. I believe in craftsmanship," Cameron played along. "Your words; 'never in a million years'." I related and waited. First there was the uncertainty and fear of the odd course our relationship had taken. It took a few seconds because so few pieces of the puzzle fit. "Cáel Nyilas; it was you; start of senior year; I had been," she muttered. Then came the real fear. "You must hate me." "I thought about it," I said, "but that isn't really me. See, you helped create me. Truth be told, you were only the catalyst. I did all the work." "A great many women helped. They were never a replacement for you. I was taught better than that by my first lover," I continued. "Still, I would be totally different if you hadn't casually annihilated my self-worth that September day." Pause. "Do you like the results?" "You really don't hate me;” Cameron was coming around. "It was high school. We all screw up in high school. According to a few studies, if you don't make a mess of high school, you are destined for failure," I related some real information. "You are getting hard again," Cameron gasped back to being okay with things between us. "Perhaps I should have warned you," I grinned wickedly. "I'm a sex addict." "Hey, Sex Addict!" Pamela shouted into the room. "There are some people out here to see you." "Good people, or bad people?" I shouted back. "Worse," Pamela replied. "The kind of people that want something from you." That was vaguely unpromising. "Cameron, take a shower and we'll talk about dinner when you get out. I think I need to take care of this," I sighed. Off went Cameron to the shower and on went my robe. In the main room, with a variety of levels of sexual tension, were sixteen women I didn't know. The Hotel Burnham has very nice suites, but they are not ballrooms. The room was pretty crowded, with not enough chairs and wall space getting sparse. They were all Havenstone women and I was willing to bet the average age was thirty-five; not my normal crowd. At least I knew why they were all there. Pamela suspected. Rachel and her team were clueless. "Hi, I am known as Cáel Nyilas," I greeted them. "A short history lesson and things will make a great deal more sense, so please be patient." The crowd was not pleased. I was a male and to a woman, the ladies had repudiated the world of men. They were all 'Runners'. It was the presence of Rachel's group that was keeping them civil at this point. "Twenty-five hundred years ago, as the Second Betrayal was ending, there was a small group of males who had proven themselves to the Amazon Host, taken into houses and their names were written on the Amazon Rolls," I started off. "Two of those males and three male children of one of the houses survived the massacre the female Amazons inflicted on their kin." That bought me a moment. Slaughtering your own babies, even male babies, wasn't something they would shrug off. "Well, if you know your Amazon politics, you know that the children of an Amazon who dies while in service of the Host becomes a member of the Host; so on and so on." The implications were sinking in as was the nervousness. "One of those men was a young warrior named Vranus of House Ishara. I am the sole surviving heir of Vranus. We are also here for the burial of my Father, who was murdered Sunday night. The next bit of Amazon politics. House Ishara was an extinct First House," I continued. "Oh shit," was uttered from half-dozen lips as they moved to the next, obvious step. "The succession to the Head of House for any House is elevation by your peers, accepted ritual combat and; the oldest surviving member of the House," I added. "By the Seven Martial Goddess; don't you have to be female? I mean; We are Amazons!" one of the 'Runners' yelled in disbelief. "Do you plan to add more males to your House?" one of the senior members growled. "Two things; it should not bother you one way, or another, and it is not MY House. It is the House of my Ancestor, Ishara. If this is going to be a problem, you are in the wrong room," I met her hostile glare ember for ember. That one headed for the door. "Wait," a fellow 'Runner' grabbed her arm. "You can't be going along with this Marsha?" the departing Amazon snapped. "I don't know this one, but I trust Buffy," Marsha countered. "Ok ladies, so that we are clear," Pamela sighed. "The next one of you to insult the Head of House Ishara, I am going to drag into the other room, kill you and cut you up into giblets for room service to take away," Pamela sounded positively disinterested. "I am not afraid of you," the departing one glared. "That would be a serious mistake," Rachel interjected quietly. Deep breath from me. "Listen, this is a highly improbable incident. I am not asking anyone to embrace the society you have rejected. In fact, I admire you for the strength it took to transition. I also ask you to accept the fact that I DO NOT want to be here, doing this, with any of you," I made one last effort. "Quite frankly, you man-haters scare me; being a man and all. You seem to think I have a choice in any of this. I don't. I am the heir of Vranus. I am the last known living descendant of the Amazon who chose the name Ishara for the sake of her house's unity," I stated. "I don't want to do this, but I'm not the kind of human being who runs away from my responsibilities." "Okay; Cáel of Ishara, why are we here?" Marsha said as she kept the other one from leaving. "Sixty years ago, the Amazon Houses swore an oath to the women who joined their cause. They lied to you. They have not kept up their side of the bargain. They have refused virtually all of you entry into the status as true, full-blooded Amazons," I explained. "And now you are going to rectify that; injustice?" the senior one kept mocking me. "Fine; you and me; one last chance," I sighed. "Look around you. Who do you see? The prettiest, the most pliable, the most power-hungry? If you can point out one woman in this room that doesn't deserve to be a Full-Blooded Amazon, leave now." "You didn't choose any of us," she responded. "Exactly!" I shouted. "I didn't choose any of you to be in House Ishara. Buffy Ishara and Helena Ishara did. Why? Because I don't know any of you, or your sacrifices and worth to Havenstone. I gave that duty to the two; and only two; member of House Ishara who would know who was the most worthy to be in a First House." "We are here to be inducted," one of the silent Amazons voiced with a dream-like quality. "Yes. Barring being rejected by Ishara, you will be inducted at my Father's graveside tomorrow morning," I stated clearly. "How many?" Senior questioned. "This time; twenty," I answered. "I have no agenda and no set number of 'Runners' to be inducted into House Ishara. It doesn't work

Cáel's tombstone: For the love of women, women put him here.In 25 parts, edited from the works of FinalStand.Listen and subscribe to the ► Podcast at Connected..

I am not an American, so I cannot vote.  I always tread the line of neutrality when discussing what is happening in America, turning myself into the Switzerland of speech giving advice.  Previously, I have written about the presenting skills of both Biden and Trump.  Now I move on to the new Democratic candidate for the US Presidency.  Republican politicians and Fox pundits criticise Kamala Harris for only being coherent and capable when she is reading her lines off a teleprompter.  I have no idea if that is true or not, because I don't see enough of her unscripted talks.  Donald Trump, apparently, has trouble reading teleprompters and so he prefers to speak extemporaneously.  He is often criticised for rambling and going off message. Teleprompters are certainly part of the machinery for politicians and sometimes for captains of industry.  I was coaching a German executive who headed up a large Japanese manufacturer here.  He had an international keynote due to be delivered in English. The major Japanese PR company had brought in a single teleprompter for him and set it up to his left. Actually, I didn't work well because the teleprompter was like a magnet and his ability to engage his audience was compromised.  Audience members on his left got all the love.  Those on the right and in the centre got almost nothing from him. I suggested he drop the teleprompter or get one for the other side as well. In the end, he went with just his notes as prompts. This was so much better.  He also wasn't reading his speech word for word, which was a major blessing. I read a funny story the other day about Barrack Obama when he was President giving a speech based on a written text.  You can imagine how much vetting goes into a Presidential speech before it is delivered and how carefully the wordsmithing is considered. Midway through the talk, he turned the page over and he suddenly realised one of his staff had managed to miss placing the next page there for him.  He had to wing it on the spot, which he did.  So even written speeches can provide unnecessary excitement and potential heart attacks for the speaker. Remember folks, only we know what we are going to say, so we can wing it if we have to.  The lesson for all of us though is to always check the pages are all there before we give the talk. A couple of things I think we can learn from Kamala Harris are timing, creating anticipation and relaxation.  I notice she has very good timing with her delivery when giving campaign speeches.  Even if you are using a teleprompter, getting the right cadence is not easy.  She makes good employ of pauses when she is speaking.  This is smart because for most of us we get nervous giving a big speech and consequently, we can tend to speed up. This happened to me.  I was giving my very first public speech. It was in Tokyo and in Japanese to some unlucky Sundai Yobiko prep school students.  I was terrified that my poor Japanese grammar would be totally unintelligible and a mess, so I wrote the whole thing out.  I did this romaji which uses the English alphabet to reproduce the Japanese sounds for words. My Japanese tutor Ms. Higashi helped me to put the speech together, so I was ready for the big day, for my first public speaking debut.  I looked down at my page the whole time, read every word and never engaged my audience in the slightest. It was a total disaster, which put me off public speaking for many, many years.  Originally, I was scheduled to give a twenty-five-minute talk.  My hands were sweating, I felt red hot, my mouth was as dry as the Sahara desert, my pulse rate was pounding and so elevated I finished the whole thing in eight minutes. The point is that when we get nervous, we can really speed up.  Kamala Harris doesn't do that because she injects a lot of pauses to control the cadence of her talks. These pauses allow the audience to diligently digest what has just been said and for each point to be clearly heard.  Even though we may find ourselves speeding up, the judicial placement of some pauses enables us to control the pace, regroup and slow down.  In her case, she often gets applause throughout her talk.  Pauses allow her to avoid speaking over the applause.  Now, this is unlikely to be a problem for any of us in business when giving speeches, but pauses are still a valuable tool for cadence and clarity. She is also quite skilled at slowing down her remarks to draw out the anticipation of what she is about to say.  The audience correctly guesses where she is going with her remarks and they applaud before she even gets there.  We may not get any applause midway through our business talk, but we can use the same idea of building anticipation by slowing down.  Let's make sure we get the audience to mentally meet us where we are going with our points. She is also very relaxed and looks like she is enjoying herself.  I am struggling to think of too many CEOs here in Japan who I have seen in action looking relaxed and like they are enjoying the occasion. I see Japanese Presidents, in particular, utilising the corporate video so that they can reduce the amount of torture they have to endure, by cutting down the time they have to speak.  If we are feeling the pressure and are nervous, it is very hard to look relaxed and like you are enjoying yourself.  As we get more experienced and add more notches on our speaking belt, the process improves.  We can seem more relaxed and like we are enjoying the opportunity to proclaim our message.  Until that happens, it is a good idea to fake it until we make it.  A nervous presenter makes the audience uncomfortable. We all want to see people presenting who are bursting with skill and confidence. Looking cool, calm and collected makes it much easier for our audience to accept what we are selling.  Confidence convinces and bolsters the words we are saying.  Try speaking with the face muscles relaxed, the body language congruent with the words being used and pay careful attention to gestures.  Nervous people tend to get stuck in the same gesture and hold it for way too long.  After fifteen seconds, that gesture loses all of its power and just becomes annoying to an audience. So copy Kamala and be relaxed when you speak.  Introduce well timed pauses and use anticipation. Enjoy the opportunity to deliver your key messages to your business audience and burnish your professional and personal brands.  

Hello everyone, and welcome to a new episode of 5-Minute Chinese. This Tuesday marked the return of our teachers to school, but after just one day, we transitioned to remote work for the next two days due to Tropical Storm Debby. Thankfully, we're back in action now. I also want to address the recent earthquake in Kyushu, Japan. My Japanese teacher lives in Miyazaki, and I'm relieved to hear that she is safe. My thoughts are with all of those directly affected. With natural disasters increasing and extreme weather events becoming more common worldwide, I extend my heartfelt wishes for your safety. Take care, and see you in the next episode.(I'm posting the script here since it's brief. I hope it displays properly on Apple Podcasts. For scripts of longer episodes, please feel free to email me if you'd like a copy.)大家好，欢迎收听新一期的五分钟中文。我们这个星期二老师就返校了， 可是星期二上了一天班以后，周三、周四就都居家办公了。原因是我们这两天有一个叫Debby的热带风暴。虽然开学了还有很多工作要做，但是学校领导层出于安全考虑，决定关闭了学校。不过还好现在有zoom meeting，所以可以线上开会。有很多工作可以在家做。还是挺方便的。风暴过了以后，我们周五学校就重新开放了。说到自然灾害，我也知道前天日本九州岛遭遇了大地震。 而且，我的日本老师正好住在宫崎县。我听到这个新闻之后就赶快给她发消息问她有没有事。当她几个小时后回复我说她没事的时候，我真的是长舒了一口气。她说她当时正在冲浪，然后现在在安全撤离中。新闻说未来几天有更大地震的可能性。如果您是我在日本的听众朋友，我真心地祝福你平安。希望你安好。近年来世界各地自然灾害都在增加，极端天气也更多了。大家一定都要注意安全。那今天就跟大家聊到这里。我们下期再见！把你的问题和建议发给我！Support the Show.It's truly an honor that my podcast can provide help and value to you. Your support and engagement mean the world to me. If you like 5 Minute Chinese, please help me by subscribing, liking, and sharing the show so that it can help more people. Thank you for your support. If you have any questions, you can email me at TheLoneMandarinTeacher@outlook.com.

This time we get to hear from Paige Lewis, a clearly unstoppable leader and executive coach. Paige grew up in the Phoenix area until she went to college at the University of Texas where she learned about advertising and business. After college she spent a year in Japan selling products for Estee Lauder after which she returned to the U.S. Through an introduction from a friend she secured a position at Disney in Home Entertainment. Later she moved to DreamWorks and then to Universal where again she specialized in Home Entertainment. At Universal she rose to the position of Senior Vice President.   Paige thought she had reached the “pinnacle of her career”, but over a short time she became seriously ill and was hospitalized for a week. As she describes that time now, she experienced serious burnout. She quit her position at Universal and began an analysis of her life which lead her to realize that she truly enjoyed mentoring people. She became a certified coach and has spent the past six years with her own business coaching and helping mainly senior level women to not “make the same mistakes she made”.   I think you are going to hear some good observations from Paige. She has wonderful life advice we all can use. I hope very much you enjoy what she has to say.     About the Guest:   Paige Lewis is a leadership coach who spent over two decades as a highly regarded leader in marketing, building some of the world's most iconic entertainment brands for Disney, DreamWorks and Universal Pictures.  After being promoted to Senior Vice President of Marketing at Universal Pictures, Paige had reached what she thought was the pinnacle of her career.  But she ended up in the hospital with a deadly infection brought on by extreme burnout.    Soon after, she left the corporate world to heal her body and figure out why she had reached a breaking point without realizing what was happening along the way. She has turned her experience into her mission: turning executive burnout into career success. With a unique ability to transform complex challenges into actionable insights and the real-world business experience as a former executive, Paige is a trusted guide for leaders seeking to excel without compromising well-being. She is dedicated to helping organizations and people realize their greatest purpose and impact without sacrificing their productivity, health, values and most meaningful relationships.     Paige is one of the elite Founding Los Angeles coaches at CHIEF, a network recognized by Fast Company's Most Innovative Companies list, created to drive more women into positions of power and keep them there. She has coached over 200 individuals and groups across Fortune 100 companies, nonprofits, media and marketing agencies, and start ups. She holds an MBA from the Thunderbird School of Global Management and a Bachelor of Science in Advertising from the University of Texas at Austin. ** ** Ways to connect with Paige:   Website: ** https://paigeonecoaching.com; PaigeOneCoaching.com LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/paige-lewis/;  Paige Lewis Sandford | LinkedIn     About the Host: Michael Hingson is a New York Times best-selling author, international lecturer, and Chief Vision Officer for accessiBe. Michael, blind since birth, survived the 9/11 attacks with the help of his guide dog Roselle. This story is the subject of his best-selling book, Thunder Dog.   Michael gives over 100 presentations around the world each year speaking to influential groups such as Exxon Mobile, AT&T, Federal Express, Scripps College, Rutgers University, Children's Hospital, and the American Red Cross just to name a few. He is Ambassador for the National Braille Literacy Campaign for the National Federation of the Blind and also serves as Ambassador for the American Humane Association's 2012 Hero Dog Awards.   https://michaelhingson.com https://www.facebook.com/michael.hingson.author.speaker/ https://twitter.com/mhingson https://www.youtube.com/user/mhingson https://www.linkedin.com/in/michaelhingson/   accessiBe Links https://accessibe.com/ https://www.youtube.com/c/accessiBe https://www.linkedin.com/company/accessibe/mycompany/   https://www.facebook.com/accessibe/       Thanks for listening!   Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it using the social media buttons on this page. Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a comment in the section below!   Subscribe to the podcast   If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher. You can also subscribe in your favorite podcast app.   Leave us an Apple Podcasts review   Ratings and reviews from our listeners are extremely valuable to us and greatly appreciated. They help our podcast rank higher on Apple Podcasts, which exposes our show to more awesome listeners like you. If you have a minute, please leave an honest review on Apple Podcasts.     Transcription Notes:** Michael Hingson ** 00:00 Access Cast and accessiBe Initiative presents Unstoppable Mindset. The podcast where inclusion, diversity and the unexpected meet. Hi, I'm Michael Hingson, Chief Vision Officer for accessiBe and the author of the number one New York Times bestselling book, Thunder dog, the story of a blind man, his guide dog and the triumph of trust. Thanks for joining me on my podcast as we explore our own blinding fears of inclusion unacceptance and our resistance to change. We will discover the idea that no matter the situation, or the people we encounter, our own fears, and prejudices often are our strongest barriers to moving forward. The unstoppable mindset podcast is sponsored by accessiBe, that's a c c e s s i capital B e. Visit www.accessibe.com to learn how you can make your website accessible for persons with disabilities. And to help make the internet fully inclusive by the year 2025. Glad you dropped by we're happy to meet you and to have you here with us.   Michael Hingson ** 01:21 Well, hi, and we want to welcome you to unstoppable mindset. This is our latest episode, needless to say, and we're really glad that you're here with us today we get to chat with Paige Lewis Sanford and I'm sure you're all familiar with Paige. Oh, you're not? Well, you will be by the time we're done here. Paige is a fascinating individual. She's worked to help improve and greatly increase the brands of organizations such as Disney and DreamWorks universal and my gosh, I don't know what all and hopefully, her influence will rub off and help unstoppable mindset but we're gonna see about that. So Paige, welcome to unstoppable mindset. And whatever happens, we're glad you're here.   Paige Lewis ** 02:07 Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here. Well,   Michael Hingson ** 02:11 it'll be a lot of fun. And we'll, we'll make it useful and fun in some way or another. And as I told you earlier, one of the rules of the podcast is we got to have fun. So that's as good as it gets. Well tell me a little about kind of the early page growing up and all that sort of stuff.   Paige Lewis ** 02:28 Well, I am a Phoenician, I grew up in Phoenix, Arizona. So I am a lover of the sun to this day, and had a really a really lovely childhood. I have a younger brother. He's 14 months younger, we were very close. And we spent a lot of our days inventing things and laughing a lot. My parents instilled a lot of curiosity in us. I'm grateful they exposed us to a lot of things. So whatever we wanted to try. We got to try even gymnastics, which I failed at. I was terrible. But thanks to my parents, I have a strong love of music. I have a lot of curiosity. And yeah, I am they made me who I am today.   Michael Hingson ** 03:15 So you grew up in in Phoenix in Arizona who have been there a number of times we've spent part of our honeymoon my wife and I a long time ago, at the point Tampa to hotel.   Paige Lewis ** 03:29 Oh, yes, I think I had a prom there.   Michael Hingson ** 03:35 Well, and our last night of the honeymoon, we went to the restaurant. At the point HEPA to which was up on the top of a mountain. And I think one way you look in there you see Phoenix and the other way, I think a Scottsdale if I recall,   Paige Lewis ** 03:50 a Scottsdale or Paradise Valley. Yes.   Michael Hingson ** 03:53 And I think it was a restaurant called a different point of view, which was cute.   03:58 Yes, yeah,   Michael Hingson ** 04:00 I've been there. My wife bought a lobster and she thought it would just kind of be a typical. So it ended up being a three pound lobster. And she didn't know what to do with it all.   Paige Lewis ** 04:10 Oh, my goodness. That's a lot of lobster was   Michael Hingson ** 04:12 a lot of lobster. But it was our honeymoon. So it was worth it. And the other thing is that that was when they made Caesar salad right at your table and actually created the dressing right at the table using rye eggs and everything's still the best dressing I've ever had.   Paige Lewis ** 04:27 Amazing, amazing. Well, I hope you were not there in the summer, because that can be brutal.   Michael Hingson ** 04:33 It was no Well, we got married on November 27 1982. So it would have been we'll see that was a Saturday. And so it would have been probably the well the third or the fourth that we went so of December so No it wasn't. It wasn't in the hot part or the hottest part.   Paige Lewis ** 04:57 That's good. That's actually a person Big time of year to beat. Yeah. Yeah, it   Michael Hingson ** 05:01 was great. We very much enjoyed our time there. So. So did you go to college in Arizona? Or did you go to college or what? I   Paige Lewis ** 05:10 did not stay in Arizona. I was 17 when I graduated high school, and I really, really, really wanted to leave Arizona. And I was very interested in getting a degree in advertising. And I'll tell you why. And it sounds silly now. But I was very determined and stubborn at that age. I always know. I know. I know, ask my mother she uses could not change my mind. So I was fascinated with how people described products. So if you looked at a box of cereal or a bottle of suntan lotion, how did they come up with the coffee? I was fascinated by how they would construct that, which seems very simple, but so I was really determined to find a good school and advertising. And one of them was the University of Texas at Austin. I also wanted a very traditional college college experience. I wanted the football I wanted to, you know, big Grecian looking buildings and grassy lawns and never thought I would like Texas, but fell in love fell in love with the campus. And so that is what I what I chose. In retrospect, it was way too big for me was 49,000. undergrad. I knew nobody. This is a this is a theme in my life is I put myself in situations where I don't know any anyone. It's uncomfortable. But I loved it. I did. I did enjoy it. I learned a lot. I had a minor in Japanese at that point, too. And after I graduated, I wanted to become conversationally fluent in Japanese. And surprisingly, in college, we didn't do a lot of speaking Japanese. It was a lot of fun and writing. Yeah. So I had an opportunity to go to Tokyo and work for one of the divisions of Estee Lauder, so cosmetics company. And some of you may remember the line prescriptives. Michael, I would not assume you would know this line. They had just opened in Japan. And so I got a job working in a department store selling makeup in Japanese. My Japanese was not very good. So it was trial by fire. Well,   Michael Hingson ** 07:37 my wife loved white linen. And when I worked in the World Trade Center, I discovered that there was an Estee Lauder second store in the tower one on the 46th floor. I think it was so little bit familiar with Estee Lauder and invaded the store often. Okay,   Paige Lewis ** 08:02 yes. So. So yeah, so I did that I knew nobody. And this was before the time of cell phones or even relatively affordable international phone plans. So I took two giant duffel bags, and my parents put me on a plane. And I showed up and they arranged for someone to meet me, a friend of a friend of a friend and I spent a year in Japan.   Michael Hingson ** 08:30 So why Japanese in the first place? Well, when I was   Paige Lewis ** 08:34 think I was a senior in high school, my high school turned into an international magnet program. And they offered what they thought were going to be the emerging important business languages of the world, which were Japanese, and Russian, in addition to what they already had French and Spanish. So I decided to Japanese my brother took Russian, I thought it would be handy no matter what I ended up doing. So that's why I went with it.   Michael Hingson ** 09:03 I took a year of Japanese in college as well. I did it was in graduate school. It was one year and we talked some but you're right. It was a lot of reading and writing. And I actually learned Japanese Braille, which was was kind of fun. I don't remember a lot of that now. But still, it was fascinating to you know, to take and people said it was simpler than Chinese and given everything I've learned I think that's probably very true. But I've spent time since in Japan when thunder dog our book was published. I was also published in Japanese. So in 2012 I went and spent two weeks over there and literally with the publisher of the book in Japan we traveled all around Japan took the bullet train from Tokyo to Hiroshima and all sorts of places in between which is a lot of fun.   Paige Lewis ** 09:53 Did you use any of your Japanese while you were there?   Michael Hingson ** 09:56 No, I didn't remember enough. It had been way too long. So, so I didn't didn't practice up enough to keep it going all that well.   Paige Lewis ** 10:06 I understand that 100% Yeah, but that's okay.   Michael Hingson ** 10:11 But I understood a lot about the customs and the people. And that was a big help as well.   Paige Lewis ** 10:16 Yes, absolutely.   Michael Hingson ** 10:18 So what did you do after a year in Japan?   Paige Lewis ** 10:23 Well, I came back. Yeah, it was a, it was a great growing experience. But it was challenging. And I missed, I missed America. So I came back. And I worked for a promotions company. And while I was there, the CEO introduced me one to Disney and to to his graduate school, which was an internationally focused MBA program. So I ended up going to Thunderbird. Some of you may have heard of it. It's the International Business School of International Management. It's now part of ASU and finished my International MBA studied more Japanese. And then at the end, when I was interviewing for jobs, there was a job at Disney. And I really thought I was going to do international business and work with Japanese companies. And you know, maybe Toyota or something like that. But this job at Disney came up. And I was fascinated by it. So luckily, I ended up getting it. It was in the home entertainment division of Disney, which was back then it was VHS tapes. You gotta remember those VHS? I do? Yes. The very, very beginning of DVD. So I took the job and I moved to LA and again, didn't didn't know anyone that my brother was there, but really didn't know anyone   Michael Hingson ** 12:01 and VHS and not beta. Yeah, that VHS had won   Paige Lewis ** 12:05 the war. So beta was gone. Yes. It was VHS. Yes. Thank you for remembering that   Michael Hingson ** 12:11 show. Your brother was in LA. He was in LA. Yes, it was he.   Paige Lewis ** 12:18 He went to school at Loyola Marymount to study Recording Arts. So he's a composer and he writes music for commercials. Okay. Yeah, he has a very cool job. Very successful.   Michael Hingson ** 12:33 So what did you do in home entertainment at Disney.   Paige Lewis ** 12:37 I started out in retail marketing, which means I was helping selling movies to the big brick and mortar retailers. So Walmart, Toys R Us, target all of those. And I did that for a few years. And then I moved into brand management, and was actually working on the strategy for selling some of the new releases. And I was there a couple of years and then a few of the Disney people moved over to DreamWorks. Everyone remembers DreamWorks. When DreamWorks started, Jeffrey Katzenberg went over there. And then a couple of people I knew from Disney, and they recruited me to come over to their home entertainment division, which was very small, very entrepreneurial, but a very exciting time to be there. As they were building the business and figuring out I got to work on track and the prince of Egypt and Gladiator Saving Private Ryan, a lot of those really great fun movies.   Michael Hingson ** 13:39 So that that kept you busy for a while.   Paige Lewis ** 13:44 And then I moved over to universal and spent 16 years at Universal Pictures and home entertainment. et   Michael Hingson ** 13:53 phone home.   Paige Lewis ** 13:56 Yes, exactly. Exactly. I didn't get to work on that movie. But I mainly worked on the family movies, so a lot of animated movies. Shrek continue with Shrek and Despicable Me. I actually worked on a lot of the Barbie movies, which was which was really fun. And I eventually worked my way up into to senior vice president which was my pinnacle, which was what I really wanted to achieve in my career. But then, as we talked about a little bit, some bad things happened at that point in my career,   Michael Hingson ** 14:34 what kinds of things happened that you want to talk about? Well,   Paige Lewis ** 14:40 I ended up in a very dangerous burnout situation. So I had been promoted to senior vice president. And soon after that a couple of major things happened in my life. My father died and then a couple of very close friends passed away So that sort of shifted how I approach life and what I thought about my priorities. At the same time, universal was having its biggest year ever. So it was the year of Jurassic World and the latest Fast and Furious movie. I think another Despicable Me It was, it was just a very, very busy year. And I noticed I started having these symptoms, so I was getting sick a lot. I was really irritable and cranky. People actually had to come mention to me that I was acting a little out of character. I was getting strange things like I had this rash on my face for no reason. And then, you know, I just ignored all this and kept, kept working because I was an achiever, and I just wanted to get the job done. So then I started having I had this pain, and I'll just say it on my butt on my right, but and it got so painful that I couldn't sit. And I thought, Okay, well, maybe a spider bit me or something. And then at one point, it got so bad that I couldn't I had to work from home, lying down. And at that point, a kind colleague said, you know, Paige, I think you might want to have that looked at. So I was like, alright, and you know, it was getting bigger and more and more painful. And so I went to my dermatologist, she took a look, she called in her colleagues to get a second opinion. And then they said, Alright, we've called the er, at the hospital next door, we need you to go there right now. So what I learned is that I had contracted Mersa, which is, yeah, an anti bot, antibiotic resistant staph infection. And it's so dangerous that if it gets into your bloodstream, it can kill you. So I was admitted to the hospital for a week, they gave me a very heavy duty antibiotic that works on this. It's so strong that it made my veins collapse. So they had to put in a PICC line. And it really, it was, you know, like they say, it was what it was my wake up call.   Michael Hingson ** 17:20 What year was this? That this was 2016. Okay, so that was your wake up call? That was   Paige Lewis ** 17:28 my wake up call. And then I went, and I had to take a month off of disability? Well,   Michael Hingson ** 17:34 certainly, that's understandable, given the severity of it, and so on. And what did you do her think about during that month, and then going forward?   Paige Lewis ** 17:45 Well, I realized, as I you know, wine there in the hospital, that something wasn't working, obviously. And I really, I really didn't understand how this happened. How did I get a staph infection on my butt. And I just, I just figured I really needed to make a change I wanted to live, I did realize that. And I wanted to get healthy. I mean, something was really, really out of whack. So this is what really did it for me. I came back in January. And this was the time when Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds had passed away. And I went into the meeting into a meeting. And this was the first meeting my first day back. And what was brought up was, you know, Debbie Reynolds just died. Do we have any movies we can put out and leverage this. And that just hit me as being so distasteful. And I realized, this is not the business I want to be in anymore. This doesn't fit. So about a week later, I went in, I quit. I quit my job, nothing lined up. No idea what was I was gonna do. But I knew it was the right thing to do. Yeah,   Michael Hingson ** 19:08 that, that just certainly seems like a pretty insensitive thing to say. I understand. Some people do that. But gee, when do you draw the line and recognize maybe it's a time to just let people mourn? I mean, look at Debbie Reynolds for such a long time, and I are going to do is try to promote you in the brand. T does that really make sense?   Paige Lewis ** 19:33 Yeah, it just it just seems a little gross to me. So I quit and then I realized that I needed to figure things out. So the antibiotics I realized, after doing a lot of research had completely wiped out all the good bacteria in my gut. And I learned that you have to have that good bacteria to stay healthy. So and I also was a diet coke addict, big time diet coke addict. And I learned that one Diet Coke can destroy your gut biome. So I quit. I quit Diet Coke, it was not easy. I will tell you. I don't know if you drink it. It's   Michael Hingson ** 20:18 no, I'm more of a water drinker. I got to say, Okay. I've never been that much of a soda drinker.   Paige Lewis ** 20:24 That's a lot better for you. Yeah. So I figured out my health. And then I started trying to figure out why this all happens.   Michael Hingson ** 20:33 Now, I was just gonna ask you what you decided about why it occurred? Well,   Paige Lewis ** 20:38 one, I learned a lot about burnout. And that stress can kill you. And that this staph infection was a literal sign, it was a literal pain in my butt that my work was a pain in my butt. And I needed I needed to find something different and, and after really thinking about things, I realized my values had shifted. So my values were no longer aligned with the work I was doing. And that caused a lot of friction, and disengagement, and stress. And so then I wanted to figure out, okay, all right, I understand that this job. Marketing movies isn't a good fit anymore. But what is, so I let curiosity kind of leaves me and I did some research. I found this great book, I don't know if you've heard of it. It's called What color's your parachute? It's been around forever, I think, in my 20s, forever. And so I picked it up again. And it had me really think about what am I good at doing? How do I use my brain? What really drives me? And I also did some work, figuring out what my new values were. And I realized, I really like the mentoring part of what I do at work. I like solving problems. And I like helping people rise to their full potential. So then I started looking into, well, do I want to become a therapist? I'm not sure I want to go back to school again for that long and spend all that money. So then I started talking to coaches, executive coaches, and I realized, well, they do a lot of what I think I want to do. And they also can give you specific direction, and steps to take. So unlike the therapist model, where it's just a lot of questions, you can actually draw upon your experience and share that to help people. And so So I actually, because every day, what I would do is I would get up and I would read, I would read articles, and I would just sort of follow the breadcrumbs. And I stumbled upon a woman who wrote a really great article, I reached out to her, she was a coach. And she was so motivating in that one conversation, that I ended up writing an article and ended up deciding I wanted to go get my coaching certificate. So this was this was end of 2017 into 2018. So I ended up getting my coaching certificate and started working with women so that they wouldn't end up like, like I was, I really don't don't, there was no reason I needed to hit that level of burnout. Tell   Michael Hingson ** 23:46 me? Well, first of all, a little bit about why do you think you actually contracted versus and why do you think that? Or how do you think that happened? Do you really know?   Paige Lewis ** 23:58 I think my immune system was so beaten down and compromised. That it happened. I don't know how it got there. I honestly don't know. I promise you I'm a clean person. I take showers. I know like wandering around rubbing myself and dirt. I just I just think, you know, there were there were signs leading up to it other smaller illnesses and my body fine was like, Okay, you're done. But I don't know, I don't know the source. Good question. Well, so   Michael Hingson ** 24:31 you went off and you started to study about being a coach and so on. What does it mean to get a coaching certificate? What's the process?   Paige Lewis ** 24:39 Oh, that's a good question. Well, there are lots of different coaching programs and the one I chose is based on human needs psychology and behavior. So I had been through a lot of leadership programs through my my days as a marketing executive. So I knew a lot of the traditional Leadership, procedures, methods, whatever you models, whatever you want to call them. So I really wanted to get into almost kind of going back to why I got into marketing, why people do what they do what's driving them. So I learned all about the six core needs and what motivates people and really had to get into their brains and change behaviors and habits. So it was 100 hours of training. I think I did it pretty quickly. I was motivated, I think I did in about four months, and then was and then was certified. And then there are all different types of coaching programs, some people do mindfulness route, some people just do a very traditional corporate route. So I wanted to kind of balance out what I already knew.   Michael Hingson ** 25:47 Well, so you went ahead and did that. And you got certified, and have been coaching ever since. I have, I've   Paige Lewis ** 25:56 been coaching for about six years, and also doing excuse me marketing consulting, because I like to keep my toe and in that part of the world also.   Michael Hingson ** 26:06 So what Tell me a little bit about the the coaching program or what you do, then how do you help people? And where do you where do you help people all over? Or where does that all come from?   Paige Lewis ** 26:21 Well, luckily, I do everything virtually. So I can help people no matter where they are. My specialty is helping women executives, I want to help them excel in their careers without impacting their well being. Someone once told me, when you become a coach, your message becomes your message. So clearly, yeah, my my story of burnout is something that really drives me and it's a passion, a passion of mine. So I typically work with women executives, who are director level all the way up to C suite. And they come to me one because they aren't loving their job anymore. They don't know why they want a career change. They're in some sort of toxic work environments and don't know how to manage it, they are experiencing signs of burnout, they don't have the tools or skills to deal with it, I help a lot of people who are wanting just to jump jump a level or two in their career. So helping them with executive presence and managing teams, a lot of your traditional leadership development skills. So I love it tremendously. And it fits really nicely with my values.   Michael Hingson ** 27:44 I had a conversation yesterday with two women who also are very heavily involved in leadership and, and coaching. But a lot of corporate leadership training, they have developed a program that they describe basically is, well the company is missing logic. And the program is based on polarity, they talk about the fact that everything is really about polarity, and like breathing is polarity exhaling and inhaling, you got to do them both. And whether you're dealing with work, or life and polarity, again, you've got to really understand that both are part of what your world ought to be. And so many people get stressed out because they don't really look at trying to balance polarity, which is really pretty fascinating. We had a great discussion about it.   Paige Lewis ** 28:42 That's an interesting way to think about it. I have stopped saying work life balance, and I call it work life harmony, because it's never equally balanced.   Michael Hingson ** 28:52 Right. But at the same time, what what Tracy and Michelle would say is that you need both poles. And it's a matter of finding how to, to have a well, I keep saying balance, but to have some sort of that making both poles work to help each other because one or the other isn't going to work.   Paige Lewis ** 29:19 That's that makes a lot of sense. Yeah, I agree with them.   Michael Hingson ** 29:22 It's a lot of very fascinating discussion, but in your case. So you do that and you don't necessarily use those terms, but it sounds like you end up getting to the same place. So you've been doing that now. Six years. Yes,   Paige Lewis ** 29:36 that is true. Six years. It's gone quickly.   Michael Hingson ** 29:40 So you think you have now found a niche that's going to last a while?   Paige Lewis ** 29:46 I think so. We still have a long way to go and getting women to an equal playing field as men. Unfortunately it isn't. It is improving. But there are a lot of things that still Need to improve. So, for example, women experienced burnout much more than men 43% of women or executives experienced burnout men only 31%. And I think it just it has to do with the kind of silence responsibilities a lot of women take on, whether that's Child Care caring for elderly parents, it's taking more on at work, that's sort of outside the your job responsibility or your job description. And women also don't think that corporations are quite there yet. And having good strategies and good programs to have gender equity in the in the workplace. I mean, 92% of women don't believe that companies are kind of walking the talk in that area. So yeah, I think there will be a need for a while it would be my dream, if there isn't a need. For this, that means that women women are equal in the workplace in terms of opportunities and roles and pay. Yeah, that's a good piece of news. I have a good piece of news, though, that I just learned, sorry to interrupt you is that there was there were, you know, people would say for a really long time, and there were stats to back it up that women were afraid to negotiate for salary or promotions, it's actually changed. And women are just as likely, if not more, to negotiate for increased salary or promotion, whatever. So. So that's some good news. And a common belief that is now has now changed. And   Michael Hingson ** 31:42 should, by any standard, we haven't seen a lot of that yet, in the world of persons with disabilities, where we're still even though we're by any definition, the second largest minority, or maybe the largest minority will be the second because there are more women than men, although people keep saying women are the minority, but in physical sense, there are more women than men. So either way, you look at it disabilities as the second largest minority, but the most excluded from any of the conversations or any of the real involvement in the workforce, which is why we continue to face an unemployment rate in the 60 to 70% range among employable persons with disabilities, like, especially with blind people. And the reality is, it's fear, it's a lack of education. And it's not understanding that, just because we may do things in a different way, it doesn't mean that the technology and the tools that we need shouldn't be part of the cost of doing business. But yet, that's what happens. Those   Paige Lewis ** 32:49 are staggering numbers, Michael, but your company is doing a lot to help with that. Well,   Michael Hingson ** 32:54 accessiBe is doing a lot to help with that and is being pretty successful. And the number of people using the technology are are growing, or is growing, and excessive. He's working on some programs to really teach more people about Internet access and website development with access and accessibility. So hopefully, that will continue. And we'll be able to make more strides, but it is a thing that we face on a regular basis.   Paige Lewis ** 33:24 Yes, it is. So for   Michael Hingson ** 33:27 what you're doing and so on. You've talked a little bit about burnout, are there different kinds of burnout? And do you deal with them all the same way? How does that address get addressed?   Paige Lewis ** 33:39 Yeah, that's a great question. I think people generalize the term burnout and and the, you know, when someone is just stressed, they'll say I'm burned out that the actual technical definition of it from the World Health Organization is that burnout is chronic stress in the workplace that hasn't been successfully managed, which puts a lot of onus on on the person, right? If you haven't successfully managed it, the company's not really helping you set up any systems to help you with that you person has to have to deal with it. But   Michael Hingson ** 34:15 which is also I'd seems to be not totally fair either. Right?   Paige Lewis ** 34:19 Right. And there's not a lot of progress in that area. Everyone is going to be burned out at some point in time. Everyone, everyone's going to face it. But there are different types. There's physical burnout, which is you're tired, you're getting sick a lot like I was you're not moving around a lot. You've kind of forgotten to exercise or even stand up from your desk and those those signs can show up like headaches or just different physical things. And then there's emotional, which I also had, that can show up as being you're cranky, you're short tempered, you're impatient. and you're not spending time with the relationships that you know are strong. Yeah, just maybe a little bit of a change in your demeanor. Then there's there's mind, there's mind related burnout, which is, when you're kind of in that fight or flight mode, and you're spending a lot of time putting out fires at work, you're distracted. You can't focus. That's that type. And then the last one is burnout of the Spirit, which often can show up as being bored. So a lot of people get really bored or uninterested in their job or whatever is important to them, and they don't realize that it's burnout. And so that could be you're doing a lot of things at work that just really aren't aligned with what you do. Well, what you like doing. And so you just kind of just kind of check out.   Michael Hingson ** 35:59 Do you find, though, that people that are, that are in that situation? Oftentimes haven't really sat down and analyzed what they really want to do or analyzed? Am I really doing the right thing? And that contributes to that? Yeah, yeah.   Paige Lewis ** 36:17 100%, like, I didn't know, I had no idea. I just kept a lot of people, you know, they're on the treadmill. They just keep going every day. And it's rare that people stop and they reflect and they reassess. It's only when people get into a state of burnout, sadly, that they need to wake up and realize, okay, something isn't working. But there are always signals, they're always signals. And oftentimes, it's more than one one type of burnout that's hitting at the same time.   Michael Hingson ** 36:50 But you just you distinguish between emotional, mind and spiritual, if you will, they're they're all three different even though in one sense, it seems like they're all sort of mental in one way.   Paige Lewis ** 37:03 They are sort of mental in one way, but they come out in different ways. And they the route of them is different. So there are two main ways to, to sort of manage burnout, the traditional way that everyone thinks is how you, you manage burnout, unfortunately, this is what companies kind of latch on to is just go take some time off, go to a spa, get a massage, and that'll cure everything. This self care really only works for the body and the emotional burnout. Because that's you're just exhausted, those two are fall under exhaustion. And with that, you actually do need to take a timeout, and take care of yourself. You only need 15 minutes, but it could be you know, take a walk, walk away from your computer, or your phone, don't take your phone with you on your walk. You know, just leave it alone. Don't let anyone interrupt you. Call call a friend, just do something that's enjoyable for you that is, will reboot your system. For the mind in the spirit burnout, which you know, is you're just distracted and you're or you're bored. Or you're in fight or flight mode, you actually are having cynical detachment. So, okay, yeah, it's different. So you so self care actually does not work. Because when you're in this space, you're focused too much inward, and on yourself, and you've lost perspective. So what you do when you have that type of burnout is you need to clarify things. And it could be clarifying your role. So role clarity, write down the three to four most important things in your job. And then ask yourself are you spending time on the high value activities, because you may not be the other. There are three parts of this. The second one is relational clarity. So you may have lost perspective about other people in your life. So a way to break yourself out of this is write a note of thanks to someone, maybe someone on your team, remind yourself that you are not alone and all this. And then the last one is perspective, clarity. So a lot of people just completely lost perspective. So go do something totally different. Go watch a or listen to a comedy video. Call your mom and ask about you know, bring up an old memory just something that reminds you that work isn't everything because these two types mind and spirit burnout, as these are a lot of the workaholics too, and they keep working, working, working and they've just lost complete perspective about everything else in the world.   Michael Hingson ** 39:55 One of the things that I realized during In the pandemic is that although, on September 11, I escaped and wasn't afraid. And I knew why I wasn't afraid, which is that I prepared and knew what to do in the case of an emergency. And as I now say, that created a mindset. But what I realized is that, the fact is, we can control fear, and we can control a lot of what we do. But we have to be mindful. And we really need to keep things in perspective. And one of the best ways to do that is to be introspective in our lives. And really practice that, until it gets to the point of being a habit, and you develop that whole introspective and self analytical muscle. And I, so we're writing a book about all of that. And we're going to, I'm going to, it'll be out next year, and we're going to talk about how to control fear and not let it as I would say, blind you or paralyze you or overwhelm you, but how do we get people to start to be more introspective in their lives and in what they do, and recognize that that's an extremely valuable thing to do.   Paige Lewis ** 41:08 You make a really, really good point. I think a lot of it like, to your point about habits, a lot of us have, you know, that inner critic, who is just saying, you know, you're not good at this, you shouldn't try to do this. You always done it this way. If you can take yourself out of that, and almost become an observer. And look at your thoughts and what how you talk to yourself as just another person, you can even name it, that kind of helps you take yourself out of it so that you can change your habits. Because a lot of the what we tell ourselves are just habits. They're not even true anymore. They're based on beliefs that you you made up a long, long time ago and had value back then. But they're not even true anymore. So I think we just need to be aware and stop ourselves. And remind ourselves, when we're thinking things, you ask yourself, Is this really true? Or is this just the habit?   Michael Hingson ** 42:14 Good point. And I also learned that along the way, I always used to say, and I still do this, but I record presentations that I give, so I can go back and listen to them. And I always say that, I love to do that. Because I'm my own worst critic, I'm nobody's going to be as hard on me as I am. And I learned, that's the wrong thing to say. And that's the wrong way to approach it. Because in reality, even teachers can't teach me they can present me with information. But ultimately, I have to teach myself. And in fact, it's not that I'm my own. I'm my own worst critic. I'm my own best teacher. And if I turn it around and use that terminology, then it becomes more of a positive process, to look at things and think about them and teach yourself even when something doesn't go well. And even when it does go well. What can I better learn to even make it go better next time. I'm my own best teacher is such a more positive thing to say.   Paige Lewis ** 43:19 I love how you reframe that, that's a great way to look at it. And, and also, you know, we talked ourselves worse than we would talk to our friends. Yeah. Which is just crazy.   Michael Hingson ** 43:32 In reality, we should talk to ourselves and really get better at thinking about things and saying, Okay, well, how do I deal with it? Don't hide from it. And no matter what it is, allow yourself to teach yourself how to deal with it.   Paige Lewis ** 43:50 And it's practice it. And then it will become a habit. Yeah. And just like we talked down to ourselves and criticize ourselves. It's just the habit. Yeah.   Michael Hingson ** 44:05 And it is a habit that we can break.   Paige Lewis ** 44:08 Absolutely. And it's just practice. It's just practice, and it's micro micro steps. You don't have to get it perfect the first time. And we forget, you know, we're not supposed to be perfect beings. We're supposed to be in this world to try new things and learn from them. And we just are so hard on ourselves that we have to be perfect at every single thing we do. And oftentimes, other people aren't even paying attention. And they forget about it   Michael Hingson ** 44:38 much more quickly than we do. And yes, there's a lesson there too.   Paige Lewis ** 44:42 Yes, and I always I always tell my clients like when they're all worked up about something or ruminating and countless something go, Well, this really matter. In two weeks. Will this matter in three months in a year? No. No one will remember you probably won't ever remember To your point, learn from it, and just let it go. It's hard, it's practice, I get it. But just to put things in perspective, it usually is not as important as we think.   Michael Hingson ** 45:12 And if it really affects you, and you're thinking about it a lot, then take a step back, as you said, and think about why is this affecting me so much? It's appropriate to do that. It's appropriate to help to understand you better.   Paige Lewis ** 45:31 Yes. And I'll give you a tip that I give my clients that I actually learned from my dad, for people who ruminate a lot of worry a lot. Actually schedule worry time in your day. And don't do it right before bed? No, no, because then you won't sleep well, but schedule it at a time. Have no distractions, sit there for 20 minutes and worry about everything. And you have to sit there even if you've run out of things to worry make it up like, my my sock is starting to unravel, you know, stupid things. My dog is panting more than usual. Whatever it is,   Michael Hingson ** 46:14 I can't figure out anything to worry about. I'm worried about that. Right? Exactly.   Paige Lewis ** 46:18 I'm worried about that I have to sit here. And Paige said I can't move for 20 minutes. So you do that every day. And what'll end up happening is one, you'll realize you don't really have that much to worry about to you train yourself that you can only worry during a certain period of time. So you're not spending your whole day worrying and ruining your day. And if you start thinking about something out, or you're worried time you say, okay, Paige, no, you're scheduled to worry about that at 10am, from 10am to 1020. And it's remarkable how people improve with the ruminating and the worrying.   Michael Hingson ** 46:56 So what mostly do you coach about what what is your specialty, if you will, overall,   Paige Lewis ** 47:01 my specialty is helping women leaders excel in their careers without impacting their well being. So a lot of that is what we've talked about today, how to handle burnout, how to manage your thoughts, how to improve your leadership skills. You know, I mainly work with pretty senior women who don't have anyone else to talk to, and this is this is a theme that I've come across a lot, and I felt myself is a lot of women leaders don't think that they have people they can talk to at their companies or within their industries.   Michael Hingson ** 47:44 Yeah, that was what I was gonna get to. Is it true that they don't, or they just don't think they do have people to talk to?   Paige Lewis ** 47:54 Well, a lot of times, it's difficult to talk to people, I do work with an amazing organization called chief. And they're a private network for women. But what they've done is they have put together peer based groups, they curate these groups of women at similar points in their career, similar levels, so that they have a safe space of peers from whom they can learn, get different perspectives. Because I, when I was first, you know, talking with Chief about coming on, as one of their first coaches, I said, if this had existed when I was at Universal, and burning out, I would not have burned out, because a lot of a lot of the struggle is feeling like you're the only one and not having the tools and the skills to manage through it.   Michael Hingson ** 48:46 And a lot of times we don't look for people to talk with, because we just feel that we're an island in the middle. And oh, I don't want to talk to people who work for me because that that wouldn't be good. I mean, there are just so many excuses that we can come up with.   Paige Lewis ** 49:05 Yeah, or you're embarrassed and you are you're embarrassed. You know, I'm the only one who's dealing with this, I must be crazy. Imposter Syndrome comes in a lot. So, no, almost everyone is going through the same things. And it's just really reassuring and helpful to know that other people are going through it, and can share some ways that they have managed it. It's these these meetings are so powerful, I can't even tell you they really, really are amazing.   Michael Hingson ** 49:39 What do you say to people who are thinking of a career change or who don't know where to start? You know, because I'm sure that comes up and what you do?   Paige Lewis ** 49:48 It does and it can be really scary. And I think I think people don't give themselves enough credit. What what helps most of my clients and help me is having a having a mindset of curiosity. Because I know for a fact that people have transferable skills, it's just getting curious and following the breadcrumbs to find out what else is out there that aligns with my values that motivates me. And that uses my skill set I can do. So one, one of the exercises I have people do is to think about sample some activity that they're doing. It doesn't have to be related to work where they are completely what you would say in flow, meaning they lose track of time they forget to eat, they know that they're kicking ass and what they're doing. And they are loving it. So it could be for example, gardening. Who knows it could be gardening. And so then what I asked them to do is, okay, really, really dissect what you're doing. What, like, how are you using your brain? Maybe you are researching the different kinds of plants that work in your soil, maybe you are laying out where they go, maybe you are looking at the different seasons? And what works best and what time of year? And then how are you interacting with people? are you collaborating with the you know, the gardener at the nursery? Are you talking with friends who have who've made great gardens? And then what skills are you using, researching, maybe strategizing, maybe organizing, and then what you'll end up seeing, and it's something totally unrelated to your job is here, all the things? And the way here are all the different ways of thinking parallel the skills I use, and here's what I love doing, and you find this intersection. And then you use your curiosity to find out okay, what industries are interesting, and what are the jobs? You reach out to people, it's curiosity. If you lean into curiosity, you cannot go wrong. And   Michael Hingson ** 52:16 all too often, we don't.   Paige Lewis ** 52:21 Correct, we kind of block ourselves. And   Michael Hingson ** 52:24 many times were discouraged from it. I mentioned earlier, the whole concept of if I've been talking to people this morning about people with disabilities, and then somebody said, What can we better do to improve the world for people with disabilities, and my response was, include us in the conversation and so many times, I can be somewhere and when when I went to my wife was live with her, she was in a wheelchair, and people would come with their children, and we'd be in a store, whatever. And a child would ask a question and say, I want to go meet that person, I want to go look at that wheelchair. And the mother would say no, don't do that. They might not like it, or that dog might bite you. And we we we discourage curiosity, especially in children, who are the most curious people of all? Mm hmm.   Paige Lewis ** 53:12 Yes. And wouldn't it be great if we could bottle that curiosity and take it with us? Our whole lives? Yeah.   Michael Hingson ** 53:20 It's important to do that. I think I think you use the term superpower, everybody has a superpower? Or how do you how do you teach people to to find their superpower? What does that mean?   Paige Lewis ** 53:34 Yes, this is this is an important piece of finding a career that works for you. And so if you think about a Venn diagram, I'm a big fan of Venn diagrams, there are three components. So they're, they're your values, you have to get really clear on what your values are, what you are good at doing and what you love doing. So when what you love doing intersects with your values, you have a passion for what you're doing. So let's say your values are adventure, and learn learning and experiencing new cultures, you may be passionate about traveling. So you can kind of see how those work. Now, when your values connect with what you're good at doing, you're going to be engaged. So if you're really connected and aligned with your values at what you're doing for work, you'll be engaged, you'll be interested, you'll be connected, you'll still be excited to go in every day and do your job. And then what you what you love doing and what you're good at doing intersect. And I've mentioned this a little bit for you're in flow. So that's when you just are just completely happy because you're doing what you love and you know you're doing your best at it. So the superpower comes in when those three things connect, when your values, what you're good at doing and what you love doing connect. And I truly believe everyone can figure this out. Once you know that, you can find a career that meets that 80% of the time, if you have that, you will be happy, you'll be happy in what you're doing. So it's a little bit like the Japanese term of ek guy, which is finding your purpose. I don't know if you're familiar with that. Remember that. And that actually has been attributed to longer life. So this idea of IKI guy or finding your superpower, and living to that will make you happier. But it also helps extend your life because you're getting up every day, and you're doing what you love doing and what you're good at doing.   Michael Hingson ** 55:56 And I find that when people are happy, they self motivate themselves. And in general, they have better days. Yes,   Paige Lewis ** 56:06 yes. And the bad days can roll off a little easier. Yeah.   Michael Hingson ** 56:11 You need to learn to live more like dogs, you know, and live in the moment and forget all the other things. And there are so many things we can't control. And we worry about them. Dogs don't   Paige Lewis ** 56:20 write, I would like to come back as a dog. Dogs have the best lives. And I think we we also have this culture of busyness being the new status quo. And we forget that we're human beings and not human doings. And I think that's where people get in trouble.   Michael Hingson ** 56:44 We so greatly overanalyze everything and not necessarily in the right way. And again, as we talked about, we don't step back and really look at it, which is part of the problem.   56:55 Yes, yes.   Michael Hingson ** 56:58 Have you written a book or anything about all of this?   Paige Lewis ** 57:01 I've written some articles. I have not written a book. I have not written a book? Well, if   Michael Hingson ** 57:06 you do, you'll have to let us know.   Paige Lewis ** 57:08 I will, I will do that. Well, if people   Michael Hingson ** 57:11 want to reach out and get in touch with you, maybe explore using your services and skills. How do they do that?   Paige Lewis ** 57:19 Well, you can reach out via my website, which is page one coaching.com. And it's spelled out I'll spell it. It's P a i g e o n e. c o a c h i n g.com. And you can also find me on LinkedIn at Paige Lewis Sanford, my new married name, yeah, you can. Yeah, you can also email me at page at patreon coaching.com.   Michael Hingson ** 57:44 So what is your husband do?   Paige Lewis ** 57:45 He is a naturopathic doctor. Oh, so he focuses on root cause? And getting to you know, the bottom of what is causing your symptoms and, and managing that and addressing that versus just throwing things like antibiotics all the time, which, you know, don't always work out. Not very good for you overall, long term. No.   Michael Hingson ** 58:10 And ultimately, we have to take a little bit more mental control over ourselves. And that's another whole story. Yes,   Paige Lewis ** 58:20 I totally agree with that. Well, gee,   Michael Hingson ** 58:21 maybe we should explore getting him to come on and chat sometime. Oh,   Paige Lewis ** 58:25 I think he would love it.   Michael Hingson ** 58:26 I'll leave that to you to set up. Yeah. I want I want to thank you for being here. And I know, you've given us a lot of really wonderful ideas. And I'm very grateful for you being here. I'm glad we had the opportunity to meet and hopefully we will do more of this anytime you want to come back on. You just need to let us know.   Paige Lewis ** 58:46 Right? I would love it. Thank you for having me. It's been great talking with you.   Michael Hingson ** 58:51 Well, this has been fun and I hope that you enjoyed it listening out there. Reach out to Paige she I'm sure we'd love to hear from you and if she can help you in any of the decisions that you need to make. That's what coaches do. So reach out to Paige. You are also always welcome to reach out to me, we'd love to get your thoughts on what you heard today. You can email me at Michael M i c h a e l h i at accessibe A c c e s s i b e.com Or go to our podcast page www dot Michael hingson.com/podcast and Michael Hingson is m i c h a e l h i n g s o n.com/podcast. Of course as we asked and I really appreciate y'all doing it, please give us a five star rating wherever you're listening to us. We love your ratings. We appreciate your reviews, and any thoughts that you have and for all of you listening and Paige, as we sort of alluded to just now if you know of anyone else who would be a good guest for unstoppable mindset. love to have you let us know. We're always looking for guests. I believe everyone has a story to tell and this is As a way to get the opportunity to tell your story and help us all learn that we're more unstoppable than we think we are. So again, Paige, I want to just thank you one last time. Really appreciate you being here and hope that you had fun.   Paige Lewis ** 1:00:14 I did. Thank you so much.   Michael Hingson ** 1:00:20 You have been listening to the Unstoppable Mindset podcast. Thanks for dropping by. I hope that you'll join us again next week, and in future weeks for upcoming episodes. To subscribe to our podcast and to learn about upcoming episodes, please visit www dot Michael hingson.com slash podcast. Michael Hingson is spelled m i c h a e l h i n g s o n. While you're on the site., please use the form there to recommend people who we ought to interview in upcoming editions of the show. And also, we ask you and urge you to invite your friends to join us in the future. If you know of any one or any organization needing a speaker for an event, please email me at speaker at Michael hingson.com. I appreciate it very much. To learn more about the concept of blinded by fear, please visit www dot Michael hingson.com forward slash blinded by fear and while you're there, feel free to pick up a copy of my free eBook entitled blinded by fear. The unstoppable mindset podcast is provided by access cast an initiative of accessiBe and is sponsored by accessiBe. Please visit www.accessibe.com . AccessiBe is spelled a c c e s s i b e. There you can learn all about how you can make your website inclusive for all persons with disabilities and how you can help make the internet fully inclusive by 2025. Thanks again for Listening. Please come back and visit us again next week.

Our image of leaders is often of someone giving orders or pontificating about what is supposed to happen.  Our leader monologue is always one way traffic and we may be laying down golden advice in English or our imperfect Japanese, but is it being received, understood, digested, accepted or employed?  In this modern, stressful, super busy life, we give the team a rapid burst from our content firehose and then we move on, because there is a lot for us to do.  Subsequently, we discover what we wanted wasn't done at all or was done incorrectly or was taken off on a tangent we never imagined possible.    This is more common than it should be and we must be cautious when we are engaging in linear communication with our teams.  The content is often published rules and regulations, policies and procedural guidelines.  We may have developed Standard Operation Procedures which outline how things are supposed to be done.  We send out our memos, emails, text messages using various broadcast media. The good thing is it is written down,  so for Japanese team members, it is easier to absorb than rapid fire conversation. These are some typical ways we launch our missives into the void and we are never sure if people actually read, noted or understood what we were saying.   We are the boss right, so they have to take careful note of what we say, especially when we take the time to get key messages in front of everyone.  We are busy people, so this type of activity by its nature will be reserved for the most important content.  Therefore, everyone should know that communication hierarchy and treat these contributions carefully and thoughtfully.  Except they don't always do that, do they.  Why?   Like their bosses, they are drowning in information, are subject to a constant bombardment of emails, messages on Teams or Slack, etc., updates on social media or from any of the other burdensome abominable conduits piling on the workload and filling up every minute of the day.  And it was in English.   So yes, we have to be articulate, concise and clear in our communication but we also have to use questions to clarify understanding and operate at the highest levels of listening capability.  Asking clarifying questions is relatively easy, but are we actually good listeners?  We assume we are, simply because we are too busy to pay any attention to how we listen. Let's explore the five levels of listening and see how we stack up.   Ignore. We might be thinking, “I never ignore the team member when they are speaking”.   Is that true though?  The person may say something which triggers a strong thought in our mind. We are now completely diverted from what they are saying, to what we are thinking.  In effect, we are no longer paying any attention to them, because we are consumed by our own thoughts.  Effectively, we are ignoring them.   Pretend. In this case, we are polite, considerate and very boss like.  We are nodding our head and looking like we are concentrating, but we may not be fully taking in what we are being told.  Again, our mind may be busily crafting what we are going to say in our clever response to their points.  Or we may have been given an indication from the team member about something that interests them and we are getting ready to give them the benefit of our genius ideas and brilliant experiences.  If we hear something that sounds like resistance to our idea, that gets an instant counter response.  We are now mentally consumed with getting our evidence ready, so that we can go into an argument with them.  We want to sort them out, get them to fly right and get them to agree with our “correct” opinion.   Selective. Bosses have a highly tuned ability to hear agreement with their opinion and may miss key information.  Our listening skills are directed only to hear a “yes” or a “no” response regarding our ideas and nothing else from subordinates.   There may be key information attached to that “yes” or “no”, but we are certainly not listening for that.  We are filtering what we hear, according to our interests and preferences.  Effectively, we are only partially listening to the person.  We are standing right there in front of them, but they do not have our full focus.  My wife assures me I am doing this at home too and she is probably right, so more work to be done here.   Attentive. In this case we are giving the team member our full attention.  We are not filtering for signs of agreement or resistance.  We are not cutting them off, finishing their sentences or redirecting them mid-sentence. We are patiently and politely waiting for them to finish what they want to say.  We then paraphrase back to them what we heard. We are not shortchanging them, thinking what we are going to say, because we are fully absorbed by what they are saying.   Empathetic. This is the highest form of listening, where we are listening with our eyes as well as our ears.  We are reading what is going on behind the words.  We are conscious of what is not being said and we are listening to the tone of how we are being told the information.  We are trying to meet the person “in the conversation going on in their mind”.   Churchillian long bursts of our brilliance may make us feel good, I certainly enjoy giving them, but as leaders we should be aiming for more interactive communication with our team.  We need to have them respond to what we have said to ensure we are on the same wavelength and that we have actually heard each other correctly.  If we discover there is a gap in understanding, then that reflection allows us to correct it on the spot.  “I never said that”, “That isn't what I meant”, “No, it is the other way around”, are all exchanges we want to avoid having to engage in.  When we are each speaking in another language, the opportunities for misunderstanding are rife.  Both sides never have enough vocabulary to completely frame entire thoughts and communicate the subtleties of the language in its original form.  English is very confronting and direct and Japanese is often vague and circuitous. Checking for understanding becomes obligatory.   However, even the act of checking is no guarantee.  If I don't completely understand what I am being told in Japanese, I may be smiling, nodding and looking like I get it, because it is tiresome and embarrassing to admit my linguistic skills are not perfect.  My Japanese team members do the same when we operate in English, so the linguistic bear traps are many.  We need to have our team members feed back to us what we think they understand, to see if it is a match.  Empathetic listening and habituated checking for understanding have to become our firm habits in Japan.

Listen to the full story: https://audiodesires.com/story/time-traveler/ Join us in our first sci-fi fantasy erotic audio story this week with this myserious time traveler and his secret mission. While on assignment, he meets you and decides to make his time in the 21st century count. Naked, alone in a spa pool and nothing to lose, you spend one unforgettable night with a man you will never see again. I hear the portal close behind me and squeeze my eyes shut. It always takes a few moments for my stomach to settle and for my head to stop spinning. I move my fingers slightly against the floor, getting the first feel for my location. Carpet. Good quality, too. I open my eyes and allow them to focus on the plush grey fibres between my fingers. Where am I? I lift my head and look around me. There's something familiar about it. I'm sure I've been here before. I slowly pick myself up off the floor. The effects of transport have worn off and I feel steady on my feet now. Right, okay then. Rule number one… establish your surroundings as quickly as possible upon arrival. I walk the width of the room to the window and pull the curtain back. The lights of Shinjuku are laid out before me. The Park Hyatt Tokyo. Of course, I have been here before. It was a long time ago...or, rather, it hasn't happened yet. I walk towards the bed and catch sight of myself in the large mirror hanging above the dressing table. The years haven't been unkind. A little rough around the edges, perhaps, but still passably handsome. I shake my head. Focus, I need to focus. Rule number two: figure out what year it is. I glance around the room. There's a familiar white envelope resting on the table and a newspaper beneath it. My employer is nothing if not consistent and a bit predictable. I push the envelope to one side for the moment, picking up the newspaper to check the date. Oh, good, it's in English. My Japanese is a bit rusty. Ah, so… it's 2021. I look myself up and down in the mirror. My clothing is a little ahead of the times, but hey, this is Tokyo. Anything goes.

Listen to the full story: https://audiodesires.com/story/time-traveler/ Join us in our first sci-fi fantasy Audio Porn story this week with this myserious time traveler and his secret mission. While on assignment, he meets you and decides to make his time in the 21st century count. Naked, alone in a spa pool and nothing to lose, you spend one unforgettable night with a man you will never see again. I hear the portal close behind me and squeeze my eyes shut. It always takes a few moments for my stomach to settle and for my head to stop spinning. I move my fingers slightly against the floor, getting the first feel for my location. Carpet. Good quality, too. I open my eyes and allow them to focus on the plush grey fibres between my fingers. Where am I? I lift my head and look around me. There's something familiar about it. I'm sure I've been here before. I slowly pick myself up off the floor. The effects of transport have worn off and I feel steady on my feet now. Right, okay then. Rule number one… establish your surroundings as quickly as possible upon arrival. I walk the width of the room to the window and pull the curtain back. The lights of Shinjuku are laid out before me. The Park Hyatt Tokyo. Of course, I have been here before. It was a long time ago...or, rather, it hasn't happened yet. I walk towards the bed and catch sight of myself in the large mirror hanging above the dressing table. The years haven't been unkind. A little rough around the edges, perhaps, but still passably handsome. I shake my head. Focus, I need to focus. Rule number two: figure out what year it is. I glance around the room. There's a familiar white envelope resting on the table and a newspaper beneath it. My employer is nothing if not consistent and a bit predictable. I push the envelope to one side for the moment, picking up the newspaper to check the date. Oh, good, it's in English. My Japanese is a bit rusty. Ah, so… it's 2021. I look myself up and down in the mirror. My clothing is a little ahead of the times, but hey, this is Tokyo. Anything goes.

Listen to the full story: https://audiodesires.com/story/time-traveler/ Join us in our first sci-fi fantasy Erotic ASMR story this week with this myserious time traveler and his secret mission. While on assignment, he meets you and decides to make his time in the 21st century count. Naked, alone in a spa pool and nothing to lose, you spend one unforgettable night with a man you will never see again. I hear the portal close behind me and squeeze my eyes shut. It always takes a few moments for my stomach to settle and for my head to stop spinning. I move my fingers slightly against the floor, getting the first feel for my location. Carpet. Good quality, too. I open my eyes and allow them to focus on the plush grey fibres between my fingers. Where am I? I lift my head and look around me. There's something familiar about it. I'm sure I've been here before. I slowly pick myself up off the floor. The effects of transport have worn off and I feel steady on my feet now. Right, okay then. Rule number one… establish your surroundings as quickly as possible upon arrival. I walk the width of the room to the window and pull the curtain back. The lights of Shinjuku are laid out before me. The Park Hyatt Tokyo. Of course, I have been here before. It was a long time ago...or, rather, it hasn't happened yet. I walk towards the bed and catch sight of myself in the large mirror hanging above the dressing table. The years haven't been unkind. A little rough around the edges, perhaps, but still passably handsome. I shake my head. Focus, I need to focus. Rule number two: figure out what year it is. I glance around the room. There's a familiar white envelope resting on the table and a newspaper beneath it. My employer is nothing if not consistent and a bit predictable. I push the envelope to one side for the moment, picking up the newspaper to check the date. Oh, good, it's in English. My Japanese is a bit rusty. Ah, so… it's 2021. I look myself up and down in the mirror. My clothing is a little ahead of the times, but hey, this is Tokyo. Anything goes.

Listen to the full story: https://audiodesires.com/story/time-traveler/ Join us in our first sci-fi fantasy Audio Sex story this week with this myserious time traveler and his secret mission. While on assignment, he meets you and decides to make his time in the 21st century count. Naked, alone in a spa pool and nothing to lose, you spend one unforgettable night with a man you will never see again. I hear the portal close behind me and squeeze my eyes shut. It always takes a few moments for my stomach to settle and for my head to stop spinning. I move my fingers slightly against the floor, getting the first feel for my location. Carpet. Good quality, too. I open my eyes and allow them to focus on the plush grey fibres between my fingers. Where am I? I lift my head and look around me. There's something familiar about it. I'm sure I've been here before. I slowly pick myself up off the floor. The effects of transport have worn off and I feel steady on my feet now. Right, okay then. Rule number one… establish your surroundings as quickly as possible upon arrival. I walk the width of the room to the window and pull the curtain back. The lights of Shinjuku are laid out before me. The Park Hyatt Tokyo. Of course, I have been here before. It was a long time ago...or, rather, it hasn't happened yet. I walk towards the bed and catch sight of myself in the large mirror hanging above the dressing table. The years haven't been unkind. A little rough around the edges, perhaps, but still passably handsome. I shake my head. Focus, I need to focus. Rule number two: figure out what year it is. I glance around the room. There's a familiar white envelope resting on the table and a newspaper beneath it. My employer is nothing if not consistent and a bit predictable. I push the envelope to one side for the moment, picking up the newspaper to check the date. Oh, good, it's in English. My Japanese is a bit rusty. Ah, so… it's 2021. I look myself up and down in the mirror. My clothing is a little ahead of the times, but hey, this is Tokyo. Anything goes.

Todd: So what are you doing this weekend, Adrianna?Adrianna: I'm going to Fukuoka with...to meet my friend.Todd: Oh cool, how do you know her?Adrianna: She went to university with me.Todd: What's she doing in Fukuoka?Adrianna: She's on the Jet Program, teaching.Todd: Oh, cool. Does she like it?Adrianna: Yeah, she likes it. She renewed her contract so this is her third year.Todd: Excellent. Do you know what you are going to be doing down in Fukuoka?Adrianna: I think she's going to take me to a pub.Todd: You've not been to any of them in Japan?Adrianna: No, not.. first time. And we are going to...What are we going to do? Oh, we're going to have a Thanksgiving celebration on Sunday and we're going to go to a Karaoke.Todd: OK, have you been to any Karaoke bars here?Adrianna: Yeah, I went to a Karaoke bar in Roppongi.Todd: Did you sing?Adrianna: Of course.Todd: Excellent. In English?Adrianna: Ah.. yeah. My Japanese isn't too great.Todd: What has she told you about Fukuoka?Adrianna: How do you mean?Todd: Like, do you know about the city?Adrianna: Not much.

Todd: So what are you doing this weekend, Adrianna?Adrianna: I'm going to Fukuoka with...to meet my friend.Todd: Oh cool, how do you know her?Adrianna: She went to university with me.Todd: What's she doing in Fukuoka?Adrianna: She's on the Jet Program, teaching.Todd: Oh, cool. Does she like it?Adrianna: Yeah, she likes it. She renewed her contract so this is her third year.Todd: Excellent. Do you know what you are going to be doing down in Fukuoka?Adrianna: I think she's going to take me to a pub.Todd: You've not been to any of them in Japan?Adrianna: No, not.. first time. And we are going to...What are we going to do? Oh, we're going to have a Thanksgiving celebration on Sunday and we're going to go to a Karaoke.Todd: OK, have you been to any Karaoke bars here?Adrianna: Yeah, I went to a Karaoke bar in Roppongi.Todd: Did you sing?Adrianna: Of course.Todd: Excellent. In English?Adrianna: Ah.. yeah. My Japanese isn't too great.Todd: What has she told you about Fukuoka?Adrianna: How do you mean?Todd: Like, do you know about the city?Adrianna: Not much.

IntroWelcome to episode 26 of the Enterprise Excellence Podcast. It is such a pleasure to have Mr Kosta Kefalakis on the show with us. Kostas has lead excellence journeys in Shingo prize winning organisations. He is passionate about upskilling and helping others grow to create a better future for themselves and others. He shares his personal journey and knowledge with us today on driving sustainable change within organisations with positivity. Summary Kostas has developed four key elements of training others to achieve positive and sustainable change.  Understand the organisation and teams first Tailor the journey to their language and culture Make it fun and enjoyable Focus on key behaviours  Quotes 04:05min and somebody just said OK, can you make a report in A3? and I said Ok. So, it was literally all text. It was nothing else but text. And I was like OK. My Japanese mentor at the time said 'hmmm, make it more visual' and I was like, 'OK, then no words, just pictures?'. He looks at me and says, 'combined'. That was literally my first experience of an A3.09:03min but in order to get, consistent I would say, excellence in your enterprise, you need to make it work for you. In other words, make it work with the language and honestly speaking, excite people. You need to make it fun, and exciting and engaging and the least resistance that you're causing, and the more excitement and the more benefits, the more you'll have chances of success.23:06min and then, if they're not driving the right behaviours, start doing like a basic problem solving analysis to say, 'why aren't we driving these behaviours?' Is it because of our KPI systems, or our meeting structures, or is it because we are firefighting all of the time or our problem solving isn't strong enough? 32.07min How do we unleash people's superpower? Right? That's the idea. How do we get people to get engaged? How do we create fun? And maybe you walk into a culture that's already fun. 36:42min Getting leadership buy-in I would say would be one of the highest priorities also. Because we know that a lot of people want the change but tend to not want to change with you as leaders. We have this saying um... we say that people who want to take a shower but don't want to get wet. 38:32min Exactly the same thing happens with leaders. They want to be heard. They want to have a say. They want to co-create. They don't want to be told in many cases, strong opinionated leaders. But if you co-create with them, it's fantastic - the results. They will defend it with you. They will go the extra mile with you. And then if you have the leadership support, you know, then it's much, much easier whereas if you don't have it, you know?LinksKostas' LinkedIn Profile: linkedin.com/in/kefalakisPhone: 0041788809012 (Mobile)Email: kefalakis@gmail.comKey Takeaways 1. Take time to truly understand an organisation and its people. Tailor your language and improvement efforts to this understanding.2. Make change fun and motivatingThis was a great episode with Kostas Kefalakis, providing insightful practical knowledge from a person who has been through this journey with organisations many times over. Thanks for an uplifting conversation Kostas.

Gaijin Guide to Japanese Daygame (My Japanese daygame book): https://www.amazon.com//dp/1718170394 Main blog - https://mikemehlman.net/ Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/mikemehlman Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/mike_mehlman/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/mikemehlman.net I had been living in Japan for about 6 months at the time, and I had gone on a day trip to Kyoto. I was with a female and we entered a bar around 4 or 5pm. I ordered a Guinness for myself and a hard cider for her. The guy working at the bar was a white European probably in his late-30s. The girl I was with didn't speak English, and I communicated with her in hyper-rudimentary Japanese, but we managed. The bartender started speaking at me in fast Japanese. And he was obnoxious about it. It wasn't a scenario where he was trying to AMOG. He was essentially engaging in the typical foreigner dick-measuring contest of "My Japanese is better than yours." I couldn't understand what he was saying. And he said to me, "How are you learning Japanese right now." I said I was at a Japanese school and that I mostly studied at cafes. He said, "You're wasting your time. You need to join a baseball team or something." Apparently he had spent 6-12 months playing on a baseball team when he first came to Japan and had learned the language really well that way. He made the point that if I wasn't actually using the language, I was wasting my time. It must have been very satisfying for him. He sees me - this confident and cocky-appearing foreigner - come into the bar, and then he immediately makes it clear, "No, your Japanese sucks." I was really annoyed at the time. But the reason I remember this and am reflecting on it now is because he was right. His advice was the best I had received. I needed to *use* the language. And studying at cafes wasn't the ideal route. If you're of the academic mindset where you enjoy learning from the books, you will experience a rude-awakening after 12-15 months of living in your country of interest. I had written a long article back in 2017 on the benefits of language immersion. If you are considering moving to a new country, this article is a must-read. I've also written a book on Japanese daygame (link above). Even after a few more years of living in Japan (over 4.5 years at the time of this post), it's still the case that if I were to do the whole process over again (e.g., move to Korea and start again from the ground-up), I would over-index on *conversation* and essentially keep the academic/bookwork to a minimum. One might think that spending lots of time at cafes in order to assiduously learn the grammar, syntax, and vocabulary would ultimately help one with conversation in the long haul, but I cannot reiterate more that this is *not* the case. It sounds counterintuitive. But this is where real experience cannot be faked. Essentially I had moved to Japan and invested heavily into a "potential energy period," where I spent long hours learning Japanese from books and flashcards, thinking that this initial study period would ultimately propel me into a much better place with conversation later on - i.e., "I'm going to have to learn this stuff anyway, so I might as well get it out of the way now. And I'll be way better at conversation later because of it." But this couldn't be further from the truth. What I learned is that time spent on bookwork applies very very little to... Full article: https://mikemehlman.net/2021/02/05/approaching-in-a-new-country-with-a-language-barrier

更多英语知识，请关注微信公众号: VOA英语每日一听Todd: Now, Shirley you are a wedding singer, so you actually go to people's weddings and you sing, correct?Shirley: Yeah, that's right?Todd: What's it like being a wedding singer?Shirley: Well, it's an opportunity for me to get dressed up and to get to see lots of other people dress beautifully too. And I think it's an honor to be able to be at an event where someone's having a very special day, so for the bride and groom it's a memorable event and we try to add to that experience. To give them something to add to their memory of that day.Todd: You must feel a lot of pressure though because, I mean, it's such a big day for everybody and there would be a lot riding on it. Do you feel like nerves?Shirley: Actually, what I feel nervous about usually is the speaking part. Not so much the singing.Todd: Interesting.Shirley: Yeah, as you know I live in Japan and so when I go to weddings they're in Japanese. My Japanese skills are not that great, so I have to say a little bit, and I usually like to address the bride and groom directly at some point and say something nice to them and congratulate them on their day and wish them the best for the future, and I get kind of stressed about doing that in Japanese so it's almost a relief when I get to just sing. I feel that I can express myself a little bit more freely once I'm actually singing.Todd: So what kind of experience? Where do you normally do these weddings?Shirley: Well, at the moment I'm living and working in a place called Oita and in Japan, it's fairly common for entertainers to sign up with a wedding company, so it's usually wedding companies that actually plan the weddings so you don't really deal directly with venues or individual people, so I've got a couple of connections with the two companies here they connect me or they make a booking. Usually, they'll be planning weddings and they'll make a booking for who they think will be appropriate and in the past, I worked in another city in Fukuoka and I sang and at weddings at the Grand Hyatt Hotel there and it was great.Todd: Pretty swank?Shirley: It was very swank. And Japanese weddings are very formal and really choreographed[编舞] to a certain degree.Todd: What do you mean they're choreographed?Shirley: Well, you know everything is planned from the very first step to the very last step so there's someone there to take the bride and groom to everything that they need to do, and everything that's happening when for example the bride might leave to change her clothing, her outfit, and they have planned events happening during then and that's a pretty common time for the music or for the singer to perform.Todd: Wow, sounds like they have it down.Shirley: They have it down pat.

更多英语知识，请关注微信公众号: VOA英语每日一听Todd: Now, Shirley you are a wedding singer, so you actually go to people's weddings and you sing, correct?Shirley: Yeah, that's right?Todd: What's it like being a wedding singer?Shirley: Well, it's an opportunity for me to get dressed up and to get to see lots of other people dress beautifully too. And I think it's an honor to be able to be at an event where someone's having a very special day, so for the bride and groom it's a memorable event and we try to add to that experience. To give them something to add to their memory of that day.Todd: You must feel a lot of pressure though because, I mean, it's such a big day for everybody and there would be a lot riding on it. Do you feel like nerves?Shirley: Actually, what I feel nervous about usually is the speaking part. Not so much the singing.Todd: Interesting.Shirley: Yeah, as you know I live in Japan and so when I go to weddings they're in Japanese. My Japanese skills are not that great, so I have to say a little bit, and I usually like to address the bride and groom directly at some point and say something nice to them and congratulate them on their day and wish them the best for the future, and I get kind of stressed about doing that in Japanese so it's almost a relief when I get to just sing. I feel that I can express myself a little bit more freely once I'm actually singing.Todd: So what kind of experience? Where do you normally do these weddings?Shirley: Well, at the moment I'm living and working in a place called Oita and in Japan, it's fairly common for entertainers to sign up with a wedding company, so it's usually wedding companies that actually plan the weddings so you don't really deal directly with venues or individual people, so I've got a couple of connections with the two companies here they connect me or they make a booking. Usually, they'll be planning weddings and they'll make a booking for who they think will be appropriate and in the past, I worked in another city in Fukuoka and I sang and at weddings at the Grand Hyatt Hotel there and it was great.Todd: Pretty swank?Shirley: It was very swank. And Japanese weddings are very formal and really choreographed[编舞] to a certain degree.Todd: What do you mean they're choreographed?Shirley: Well, you know everything is planned from the very first step to the very last step so there's someone there to take the bride and groom to everything that they need to do, and everything that's happening when for example the bride might leave to change her clothing, her outfit, and they have planned events happening during then and that's a pretty common time for the music or for the singer to perform.Todd: Wow, sounds like they have it down.Shirley: They have it down pat.

How To Review Your Presentation   Athletes and coaches spend a lot of time watching their team's performance.  Strengths and weaknesses are sought in order to amplify the former and eliminate the latter.  Close scrutiny is applied to key moments, crucial transitions and pivotal points.  Presenting should be no different.  Cast your mind back though, to the last twenty presentations you have attended and ask yourself how many speakers were recording themselves for later analysis?  I would assert that the answer would be either zero or very close to zero.  Why would that be?  High performance athletes are constantly using video to check on what they are doing.  Why don't high performance leaders, experts, executives, industry influencers, and assorted gurus do the same thing?   These days the technology is very good.  A simple video camera and tripod investment is a minor affair.  The camera microphone itself at a certain distance is fine or you can add a shotgun microphone if needed.  You just set it up turn it on and forget about it until the end.  You may have to be careful with the arrangements such that no one in the audience will be in the shot and you need to tell everyone that is the case in order to remove privacy concerns.  Well if it is all this easy why aren't more speakers doing this?    The smarter ones are.  I often coach speakers before major presentations and we always use video.  I can tell them what they are doing that needs improvement, but there is nothing more powerful than having that information pointed out to you and seeing it at the same time.  If it is just you shooting the video yourself and there is no coach review possibility, there is still enough material on the video for you to make improvements in your presentation.   How do you review the presentation?  Look at four possibilities for the next time.  What can you delete, add, reduce or amplify?  There may be habits you have that detract from the persuasion power of the message.  Perhaps you are mumbling or umming and ahing.  Confidence sells and to sound confident you must be clear and consistent in your delivery.  Look for tell taLe body language tics that have a negative connotation.  You might be swaying around in a distracting way that competes with what you are saying.  Or you maybe be fidgeting, or striding around the stage showing off to everyone how nervous you are.  All of these habits weaken your message with your audience.   Are you engaging the audience with your eye contact?  My Japanese history professor at university would deliver every lecture staring at the very top of the back wall and never engage in any eye contact with the students.  Don't be like that.  Use every second of the presentation to lock eyes with members of your audience for about six seconds, one at a time and in random order.  Are you using congruent gestures during you explanation or no gestures or too many gestures or permanent gestures?  Gestures are there to be points of emphasis, so hold for a maximum of fifteen seconds and then turn them off.   Video is also excellent for considering what you might have done, looking for things you could have added to the presentation.  Maybe there was a chance to use a prop or introduce a slide to support a point or call for more audience participation by getting them to raise their hands in response to a question.  I was giving a talk recently on “AI in the Workplace” and I showed two paintings labelled A and B and asked the audience which one was painted by AI.  They had to raise their hands to vote.  This was more interesting than just showing them a slide with a painting done by AI.  Roughly half of the audience went for either A or B.  In fact they were both done by A1 so it was a bit of ruse, but very effective to drive home the point I was making.   If you cannot organise a video or if the hosts are not cooperative, then have someone you trust give you feedback.  Don't ask them a broad question such as “how was it?'.  We need to be more specific.  “Did my opening grab the attention of the audience?”,  “Were my main points clear and supported with credible evidence”, “Was I engaging my audience with good quality eye contact throughout?”,  etc.  Give them a checklist before you start so you can guide them in what to look for.  Unless they are a public speaking expert themselves, they won't know how to help you best.   In a year, most people don't get that much opportunity to speak in public, so it very hard to get the right frequency to enable improvement.  If you could do the same presentation five times in a row, by the last one you would be on fire, but that hardly ever happens.  This is why the video or expert feedback becomes so useful.  You can review the presentation at your leisure and improve on your professional public speaking capabilities for the next outing.        

See you back reporting on E! News Tues!! xx “Cleansing” it's not just green juices -- we've evolved to lifestyle cleansing for 2019.  Hotter. Smarter. Better -- here's how:  We associate cleansing with short term weight loss ...But history shows us that cleansing is really about ridding the mind-body-spirit of anything that is harmful. Cleansing should now be safely adopted as a way to optimize our health. Cleansing should keep us stronger, vibrant and vital for life. Historically, pleasure and health are intrinsically linked and 2019 is bringing back ancient cleansing methods -- that are trending like crazy! Our ancestors have been real deal cleansing for centuries.. I'm just here to report on those ancient traditions, making a modern cleansing comeback: Cleansing that's pleasurable, ancient and DELISH is the new lifestyle: here 2019's best trends to cleanse! 1- MATCHA CLEANSE! Show Graphic! The Matcha Cleanse: Swapping Matcha for Coffee -- this is the hottest and easiest way to get your beauty routine boosted, naturally, clear your mental focus and get more nutrients! Ritualistic beverage -- Trendyyy for 2019! Traditionally made with a bamboo whisk, bowl and hot water -- CK Matcha demo! Has 10x the amount of antioxidants as a standard cup of green leaf tea!!! Because you're ingesting the whole leaf! Matcha gives you longer, sustained energy throughout the day, unlike coffee that causes a steep boost in energy and a hard crash More antioxidants in matcha than in coffee, getting the full nutritional value of green tea leaf May boost metabolism and may burn calories/fat May help in fighting off free radicals Also, this is a time to spend a few extra bucks on the good stuff like Matcha Love! It's worth the splurge - don't go for the cheap imitation matcha, you won't gain the same benefits!   2- WHAT TO EAT: SOUP TO BEAUTY + ADD FERMENTED FOODS   “cleansing” with sugary juices is deprivation!… of calories, of flavor, of pleasures. It doesn't have to be that way. You can get red carpet ready in a healthy, pleasurable way. Soup is my secret weapon.   Here's why: SOUP TO CLEANSE: BONE BROTH BASED SOUPS CONTAIN COLLAGEN!! Its my secret ingredient to beautiful skin, glowing hair and healthy nails!! Bone broth promotes healthy digestion Protects your joints & strengthen your bones: HEALTHY GUT - you can add fresh ginger and turmeric too! VEGGIE BASED Souping is great for these colder months with nutrients and fiber and you can opt for a gazpacho during the summer time.   When you juice: You will shed water weight -- when juicing -- but will likely gain it back! WATCH OUT FOR HIGH SODIUM SOUP + IF YOU'RE VEGAN try our carrot ginger soup + soups with beta carotene for a glow!    EAT MORE FERMENTED FOODS Fermented Foods: Why? the smartest way to cleanse everyday  -- our ancient ancestors practiced this: trends include: kombucha tea, ACV, fro yo with probiotics + miso is on the rise as a huge trend ingredient for 2019 Miso is a protein rich soy bean paste that provides the gut with beneficial bacteria to help the body stay healthy. Healthy gut is linked to mental and physical wellbeing. Miso is packed with health benefits, as it is a fermented food containing probiotics (good bacteria) which keep your gut flora happy, your immunity up and your digestive system healthy. Miso has anti-inflammatory benefits and is full of nutrients like zinc, copper, vitamin k, manganese, protein and fiber.   3- RELAX AND ADD RITUALS TO YOUR ROUTINE:   It's just as important to relax and chill this year as our ancestors have, here are some simple ways our ancestors have continuously learned to relax My Japanese ancestors have been reaping the benefits of Hot Springs and Onsen Baths for thousands of years. If you're not traveling to Japan anytime soon, you can warm up your tub with some lavender + epsom salt and reap some of the same benefits including: Reduce more stress and relax the way my Japanese ancestors have Increasing circulation HELPS you to stay regular//cleansing If you're feeling adventurous, find your nearest hot spring LIKE MY JAPANESE ANCESTORS DID! These are all realistic and easy to follow! Choose what YOU want to focus on for 2019 -- No rules! Cleanse your whole lifestyle and feel good the way our ancestors once did! Pick up Kintsugi Wellness ASAP + SHOP TheMatchaShoppe.com  to support this free podcast and get the matcha cleanse! xx Candice  Get full access to Candice's Substack at candicekumai.substack.com/subscribe

See you back reporting on E! News Tues!! xx “Cleansing” it's not just green juices -- we’ve evolved to lifestyle cleansing for 2019.  Hotter. Smarter. Better -- here's how:  We associate cleansing with short term weight loss ...But history shows us that cleansing is really about ridding the mind-body-spirit of anything that is harmful. Cleansing should now be safely adopted as a way to optimize our health. Cleansing should keep us stronger, vibrant and vital for life. Historically, pleasure and health are intrinsically linked and 2019 is bringing back ancient cleansing methods -- that are trending like crazy! Our ancestors have been real deal cleansing for centuries.. I’m just here to report on those ancient traditions, making a modern cleansing comeback: Cleansing that’s pleasurable, ancient and DELISH is the new lifestyle: here 2019’s best trends to cleanse! 1- MATCHA CLEANSE! Show Graphic! The Matcha Cleanse: Swapping Matcha for Coffee -- this is the hottest and easiest way to get your beauty routine boosted, naturally, clear your mental focus and get more nutrients! Ritualistic beverage -- Trendyyy for 2019! Traditionally made with a bamboo whisk, bowl and hot water -- CK Matcha demo! Has 10x the amount of antioxidants as a standard cup of green leaf tea!!! Because you’re ingesting the whole leaf! Matcha gives you longer, sustained energy throughout the day, unlike coffee that causes a steep boost in energy and a hard crash More antioxidants in matcha than in coffee, getting the full nutritional value of green tea leaf May boost metabolism and may burn calories/fat May help in fighting off free radicals Also, this is a time to spend a few extra bucks on the good stuff like Matcha Love! It’s worth the splurge - don’t go for the cheap imitation matcha, you won’t gain the same benefits!   2- WHAT TO EAT: SOUP TO BEAUTY + ADD FERMENTED FOODS   “cleansing” with sugary juices is deprivation!… of calories, of flavor, of pleasures. It doesn’t have to be that way. You can get red carpet ready in a healthy, pleasurable way. Soup is my secret weapon.   Here’s why: SOUP TO CLEANSE: BONE BROTH BASED SOUPS CONTAIN COLLAGEN!! Its my secret ingredient to beautiful skin, glowing hair and healthy nails!! Bone broth promotes healthy digestion Protects your joints & strengthen your bones: HEALTHY GUT - you can add fresh ginger and turmeric too! VEGGIE BASED Souping is great for these colder months with nutrients and fiber and you can opt for a gazpacho during the summer time.   When you juice: You will shed water weight -- when juicing -- but will likely gain it back! WATCH OUT FOR HIGH SODIUM SOUP + IF YOU’RE VEGAN try our carrot ginger soup + soups with beta carotene for a glow!    EAT MORE FERMENTED FOODS Fermented Foods: Why? the smartest way to cleanse everyday  -- our ancient ancestors practiced this: trends include: kombucha tea, ACV, fro yo with probiotics + miso is on the rise as a huge trend ingredient for 2019 Miso is a protein rich soy bean paste that provides the gut with beneficial bacteria to help the body stay healthy. Healthy gut is linked to mental and physical wellbeing. Miso is packed with health benefits, as it is a fermented food containing probiotics (good bacteria) which keep your gut flora happy, your immunity up and your digestive system healthy. Miso has anti-inflammatory benefits and is full of nutrients like zinc, copper, vitamin k, manganese, protein and fiber.   3- RELAX AND ADD RITUALS TO YOUR ROUTINE:   It’s just as important to relax and chill this year as our ancestors have, here are some simple ways our ancestors have continuously learned to relax My Japanese ancestors have been reaping the benefits of Hot Springs and Onsen Baths for thousands of years. If you’re not traveling to Japan anytime soon, you can warm up your tub with some lavender + epsom salt and reap some of the same benefits including: Reduce more stress and relax the way my Japanese ancestors have Increasing circulation HELPS you to stay regular//cleansing If you’re feeling adventurous, find your nearest hot spring LIKE MY JAPANESE ANCESTORS DID! These are all realistic and easy to follow! Choose what YOU want to focus on for 2019 -- No rules! Cleanse your whole lifestyle and feel good the way our ancestors once did! Pick up Kintsugi Wellness ASAP + SHOP TheMatchaShoppe.com  to support this free podcast and get the matcha cleanse! xx Candice 

Its good to be back thanks for staying tuned and staying stoked. For your patients I have a super extra long episode for you. I share with you what happend to me and my kidney while in Japan during the month of October. Mahalo to the staff f at Mishima Hospital for helping stay alive. We visit with Michael Miller from Tiki's Grill & Bar about his new position on the board of the Hawaii Food Bank. You can Help out and make a donation to the food bank here http://hawaiifoodbank.org We feature music from Kalani Pe'a, Eric Hutchinson, Kahulanui, Willie K, Steff Mariani and comedy as well as a lesson in pigeon from Andy Bumatai. (Hey Andy i think i mispronounced your name several times I'm sorry but i stay dyslexic but still love you) Here are the show notes Aloha and welcome back to Hawaii Posts Hawaii’s only weekly update for weather surf and island events I’m your host Tom e Gaupp a.k.a. Tom e Stokes It’s good to be back and i thank you for staying tuned and staying stoked. In this our 11th episode we have our 777 followed by in interview with Michael Miller a new board member with the Hawaii Food Bank and we will close out the show with a few songs from our events featured artist The month of october was a wild month and I actually made a podcast for the first 2 months but fell short of posting it on my way to the airport. I was in Japan for a few weeks with my family while at Tokyo Disneyland nearly collapsed from abdominal pain, I thought it was just kidney stones but upon the insistence of my wife and father inlay i was taken to the emergency room and diagnosed with acute kidney infection, Pyelonephritis, caused by passing massive kidney stones that caused tearing in the ureter which is the tube between the kidney and the bladder. I was admitted to Mishima hospital for 7 days. It was pretty serious, my blood test revealed deadly levels of bacteria and high white blood cell count. The doctor braced me to prepare for the worse but hope for the best. I was on the verge of sepsis or septicemia which is a blood infection which could lead to septic shock which has a 50% mortality rate. Dr. Suzuki and Dr. Okubo and the whole staff at Mishima Hospital worked hard to heal me and by the grace of God i was cured in 5 days. But its a long road to recovery. It was pretty scary at first, being in a foreign land far from home. My Japanese is pretty limited but i am always trying to learn more and improve my japanese vocabulary. I speak survival japanese I can from greeting to and direction i talk about the weather, food and nod politely but i needed to communicate with the medical staff at the hospital if i wanted tell them how i felt and what i needed or just wanted to know what was going on inside my body. While in the hospital i used google translator app to converse with the doctors, nurses, pharmacist food service and staff. I am blessed to have a loving wife with caring in-laws. Both my mother and father inlaws came to my room several times to check in on me and bring me some much need snack and my favorite VitaC1000 dinks. My wife had to travel on with my boys, because the trip was for my kids and a chance for my wife to visit the grave sites of her recently deceased. Hospitals are no place for kids to hang out so off to Legoland and Kyoto they went. It’s safe to say that most of you may never spend a single day in a Hospital but let me tell you. The staff is so kind and caring the facilities are clean and well managed and the food, i ate everything they served me and enjoyed every bit of it. I tried new foods that prior to my stay in the hospital, might have otherwise passed up for the more popular japanese food such as my go-to sushi plates and udon noodles. But in the Mishima Hospital the dishes were more like japanese country cuisine bamboo shoots, nabe, wide varieties of fish, salads and side dishes. Needless to say after my first two days as i started to regain my health i ate very well. Fortunately i still have my mother and father in my life. My Dad sends my a prayer book from “Today” every two moths, i found it interesting that the first night in the hospital the lesson and prayer was titled “The Stone”. My mom is a retired nurse form the Ohio State University hospital and she is my personal medical assistant always there to help me understand what is wrong with me my wife or kids. She offered insight and loving comfort which was greatly needed at that time Laying in my hospital bed It game me plenty of time to think about my life, loved ones and the direction i would wish to proceed. I busted out some sophmorish artwork to keep up with my 4Buckeyes comic strip (learning that i can’t draw very well and i miss my computer to generate clean graphics and much better text … because my handwriting is worse than my 4 y.o. son) As Sinatra would sing in the standard “My Way”, “Regrets i have a few but then again too few to mention”. I decided that i would confess to this audience and anyone there after that i am not perfect, that i have said and done things that i wish i could take back or do again with a little more love in my heart. I resolved to be a better person every day and practice the golden rule of doing unto others as i would have them do unto me. I asked god for forgiveness, a chance to heal and the strength improve upon my life every day after. I was scared so reached out to my friend and family asking for their thoughts and prayers, something i never have done before but in the darkness of my hospital room thousands of miles from home, i cried in pain and was overwhelmed with sorrow and guilt wanting to be a better husband, father, son and friend to all. With great delight i received the thoughts and prayers from those i asked. It built up my spirit and health. Let me tell you Humility and Prayer works. Remarkably i was healed faster than 7 days the doctor predicted, I was discharged after 5 days and got to re-join my family and travel on to Osaka. Still weak and sore and irritable i realized that changing my was would take time tobe the better person i desire to be. I thank God, my family, friends and the entire staff at Mishima Hospital. Dr. Suzuki, Dr. Okubo, Then nurses Hitomi, Nagisa, Yuka, Yutom, Kaho, Yuka, Azumi, Tomoko. The food service staff Kotomi and Mieko. The pharmacist Yuichi Naito I have a few check ups with my doctor and urologist coming up in the near future but i am on the road to recovery, feeling better. I have started new exercise routines to strengthen my body mind and spirit. While there are many causes for Kidney Stones, Hydration may be the best prevention flushing your system of Oxalate excessive vitamin D or protein. In the last 10 years i have been drinking lots of water but the fact is my stones have been forming all my life and working in the hot sun as a life guard and surf cameraman over the years may have caused dehydration. I think back to my youth and realize that i didn’t drink enough water, even though i was a swimmer surrounded by water i just didn’t drink enough water. My kids take water to school and refill their bottles while at school. I remember this days in school waiting my turn at the drinking fountain and those friendly taunts and teases while i took my turn drinking “Hey save some for the fish!”. My best advise is stay hydrated. I just wanted to share that with you Now on with the show…… Here is your 7 7 7 forecast for Weather Surf and Events for all of the hawaiian islands 7 Day Weather Currently its 84 and sunny Winds have shifted from the typical NE tradewinds to south east winds with bings with it a little more humidity, vog and a good chance of epic sunsets. Light Trades will return on friday november 8th The next 7 days will be mostly sunny with occasional passing showers in the morning and evenings temperatures will range from 69-72 lows and highs from 79-84. Next thursday the 15th we have a good chance of more frequent precipitation https://www.timeanddate.com/weather/usa/honolulu Sun this week sunrise today was 6:38 and the sun set today is at 5:51 providing you with 11hr 13min of daylight losing an average 56 sec of sunlight every day next thursday the 15th sunrise will be 6:42am and sunset at 5:51 giving you 11hr 7min of daylight https://www.timeanddate.com/astronomy/usa/honolulu Our moon phase this week today its at a waxing minimum of 1.7% …. just a teeny tiny sliver that will be nearly invisible since the moon rise is at 7:37 am and moon set at 7:07pm The moon is waxing so that sliver will become a half moon by next thursday the 15th with the moon rise at 1:16pm and will be setting at 12:02am with a rumination of 55.7% In the night Sky Jupiter will set shortly after the sun around 6:45 and visible only aft the sun sets Mercury will set after the sunset @ 7:10 and visible in western sky Saturn is visible directly above after sunset and the will set around 9:10pm Mars will be the prominent planet in the evening setting around 12:50am If you have binoculars you can see Neptune which sets at 2:13a Uranus which will set at 5:32 Venus is a early bird shining bright rising at 5:12a in the east just before sunrise constellations Directly above is Pegasus North - Ursa Minor NW - Draco and Hercules W - High in the sky is Aquila SW - Capricornus above the horizon, Sagittarius along the horizon S - from the horizon looking up you will see Tucana, Pieces and Aquarius SE - Eridunus and cetus above that E - you’ll see Orions left side on the horizon and Pices higher in the East NE - from horizon and above you will see Auriga Perseus & Triangulum SURF High Tides at sunrise and sun set with the lows mid day North Shores: on the rise through the weekend saturday 4-6 with 6-10 faces sunday peaking at 5-8 thats 8-14 faces (2stories) then dropping but expect more bumps and swells throughout the week. West Shores: 2-5 (3-8 faces) Saturday and peaking at 3-6 (5-10) dropping on monday East Shores: holding at 1-2 (2-4faces) sunday may see a secondary swell around 2to 4 (3-7) South Shores holding at 1-2 Events Big Island Hawaii Kona Coffee Cultural Festival OCCURS BETWEEN: FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 2018 - SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 18, 2018, 10:00AM - 5:00PM 48th Annual Kona Coffee Festival, Kona Coffee Cultural Festival on Alii Dr. in Kailua Kona 100% Pure Kona Coffee Half Marathon OCCURS ON: SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 10, 2018, 6:30AM - 11:30AM Come and join us for the 3rd annual 100% Pure Kona Coffee Half Marathon. Run the scenic coastline of Kailua-Kona from Coconut Grove Marketplace Hilo Hula Tuesday At The Bandstand OCCURS BETWEEN: TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 13, 2018 - TUESDAY, DECEMBER 18, 2018, 11:00AM - 12:00PM Every Tuesday from 11 a.m. to 12 noon our well-known local entertainers provide a program of Hawaiian music and hula at this FREE event in Historic Downtown Hilo at the bandstand across from the Hilo Farmers Market.   Maui Above the Fold: New Expressions in Origami OCCURS BETWEEN: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018 - SATURDAY, DECEMBER 1, 2018, 10:00AM - 5:00PM Gallery hours: Tue – Sun 10 am - 5 pm (Also open before Castle Theater shows and during intermission) Maui Chef's Table OCCURS BETWEEN: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018 - SATURDAY, DECEMBER 29, 2018, 6:00PM - 9:00PM AN INTERACTIVE, MULTI-COURSE DINING EXPERIENCE Dive into a menu of dishes inspired by The Mill House Chefs' personal stories and told through Maui's seasonal ingredients Hula O Nā Keiki OCCURS BETWEEN: FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 2018 - SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 10, 2018, 8:00AM - 9:00PM Kā'anapali Beach Hotel is proud to host its 28th annual Hula O Nā Keiki – Maui's only children's solo hula competition. This year's event will be held November 9-10, 2018 in the Kanahele ballroom. Chinese Heritage Festival in Lahaina OCCURS ON: FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 2018, 10:00AM - 8:00PM Lahaina celebrates the town's enduring Chinese heritage Oahu Bruno Mars will be in town doing 3 shows tonight Nov 8, sat nov 10, sunday nov 11 Peter Gene Hernandez, known by his stage name Bruno Mars, is an American singer-songwriter and record producer. Raised in Honolulu, Hawaii, by a family of musicians, Mars began making music at a young age and performed in various musical venues in his hometown throughout his childhood. He graduated from high school and then moved to Los Angeles, California Hawaii International Film Festival (38th Annual) OCCURS BETWEEN: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018 - SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 18, 2018 Established as the premier international film of the pacific at the Regal Cannery Theaters 735 Iwilei Rd Bishop Museum Presents the "Rapa Nui: The Untold Stories of Easter Island" Exhibition OCCURS BETWEEN: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018 - SUNDAY, MAY 5, 2019, 9:00AM - 5:00PM More than 150 cultural treasures and never-before-seen biological specimens from Bishop Museum’s collections will be on display together for the first time in the Celebrating the 150th Anniversary of the Meiji Restoration and Immigration to Japan Exhibition OCCURS BETWEEN: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018 - SUNDAY, JANUARY 6, 2019, 10:00AM - 4:30PM In 1868, Japan underwent a political revolution. With the coronation of Emperor Mutsuhito (known commonly as the Meiji Emperor), the Imperial Family regained political control, and the feudal stratocracy Honolulu Museum of Art @900 S Beretania HIC Pro OCCURS BETWEEN: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018 - FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 2018, 8:00AM - 4:00PM The HIC Pro annually kick-starts the North Shore’s competitive surf season and is characteristically graced with monstrous surf and high drama. The event takes place at Sunset Beach, which is one of the world’s most preeminent deep-water big wave spots that spans across a stadium-sized venue Royal Hawaiian Band At Kapiolani Bandstand OCCURS BETWEEN: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018 - SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 25, 2018, 2:00PM - 3:00PM Founded in 1836 by King Kamehameha III, it is the only band in the United States with a royal legacy. With cultural roots dating back to the time of the Hawaiian monarchy, the mission of the Royal Hawaiian Band is to promote and foster hawaiian music The Music of Pink Floyd OCCURS ON: FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 2018, 7:30PM - 10:00PM Any Colour You Like - https://youtu.be/bK7HJvmgFnM Windborne Music and Brody Dolyniuk are back! Last season we brought you The Music of Journey and The Music of Led Zeppelin – this season, we're bringing you Windborne's Rock Symphony The Music of Pink Floyd, featuring singer Brody Dolyniuk. World War One Centennial and Veteran's Day Commemoration OCCURS ON: SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 11, 2018, 6:00AM - 8:30PM In Commemoration of the 100th anniversary of the end of WWI there will be a full day of activities at or around the Waikiki Natatorium War Memorial. Hawaiian Pro OCCURS BETWEEN: MONDAY, NOVEMBER 12, 2018 - SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 24, 2018, 8:00AM - 4:00PM The opening event of the Vans Triple Crown of Surfing, the Hawaiian Pro has created a local legacy that sets the bar for competition and initiates the start of peak surf season on Oahu. The break at Haleiwa Ali‘i Beach, simply referred to as ‘Haleiwa’, offers a wide variety of rideable Vans Triple Crown of Surfing OCCURS ON: MONDAY, NOVEMBER 12, 2018, 8:00AM - 4:00PM The Vans Triple Crown of Surfing has been crowning the greatest competitive surfer of the North Shore's infamous big wave season alongside elite World Champions for 36 years. Oahu attracts the world's best athletes to a 7-mile stretch of coastline in Haleiwa from October through December, Diamond Head Arts & Crafts Fair 2018 OCCURS ON: SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 11, 2018, 9:00AM - 2:00PM Enjoy your day doing your Christmas shopping early at this community event for the whole family, featuring Made in Hawaii arts and crafts, plants, food, entertainment and cultural events and lots of free parking. With more than 200 crafters and handmade crafts, @ Kapiolani Community College BLUE NOTE HAWAII FEATURES Kalani Pe’a No ‘Ane’i - https://youtu.be/UqPBOkks5_Y OCCURS ON: FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 2018, 6:30PM - 11:00PM Kalani Pe’a will be performing at Blue Note Hawaii with 2 shows nightly at 6:30pm & 9:00pm. Kalani's soulful voice showcases his many influences growing up, but his love for our culture keeps it right where it needs to be," said Jaz Kaiwikoʻo. Peʻa was determined in perpetuating Hawaiian Eric Hutchinson Eric Hutchinson - a million bucks on a queen motel bed (The FlowerSchool Sessions https://youtu.be/Bwjy7V8sfVw OCCURS BETWEEN: SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 10, 2018 - SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 11, 2018, 6:30PM - 11:00PM Eric Hutchinson will be performing at Blue Note Hawaii with 2 shows nightly at 6:30pm & 9:00pm. Singer, songwriter, performer, producer, DJ - Eric Hutchinson is a constantly evolving musician, driven by his passion and curiosity for all things musical and creative Kahulanui E Mau - https://youtu.be/hqR6zkTcbYI OCCURS ON: MONDAY, NOVEMBER 12, 2018, 6:30PM - 11:00PM Kahulanui will be performing at Blue Note Hawaii with 2 shows nightly at 6:30pm & 9:00pm. GRAMMY® nominated and Nā Hōkū Hanohano Award-winning group Kahulanui is a nine-piece Hawaiian Swing Band from the Big Island of Hawaii, comprised of four horns, guitar, bass, ukulele, drums and steel. Willie K You Ku’uipo - https://youtu.be/txQj9pOCPMY OCCURS ON: TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 13, 2018, 6:30PM - 11:00PM Willie K Will be performing at Blue Note Hawaii with 2 shows nightly at 6:30pm & 9:00pm. The Hawaiian phenomenon Willie K is undoubtedly the only artist in the world who can go into an Irish pub in the middle of Maui and play anything from indigenous acoustic Hawaiian music to jazz, reggae, rock Stef Mariani Stay Gold https://youtu.be/5JUxDux2rt0 OCCURS ON: WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 14, 2018, 6:30PM - 11:00PM Stef Mariani will be performing at Blue Note Hawaii with 2 shows nightly at 6:30pm & 9:00pm. Stef Mariani delivers sensitive folk melodies and driven lyrics that come together to form a passionate sound straight from the heart. Andy Bumatai Presents Hawaii Comedy Showcase Hawaiian Pidgin 101 - Ethnicities https://youtu.be/e_LVtykh09w OCCURS ON: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 2018, 6:30PM - 11:00PM Andy Bumatai Presents Hawaii Comedy Showcase will be performing at Blue Note Hawaii with 2 shows nightly at 6:30pm & 9:00pm. The Blue Note is very proud to present this showcase of the hottest comedians in Hawaii and hosted by our friend and Hawaiian Comedy Legend, Andy Bumatai! ♫ Mr. Sun Cho Lee ♪ (with lyrics) ♫ Keola & Kapono Beamer Mr. Sun Cho Lee - https://youtu.be/kS2YLvGGtwY Kauai In the Kitchen - Poipu Food & Wine Festival OCCURS ON: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018, 8:00AM - 6:00PM Cook with some of Poipu's finest Chefs at this year's Poipu Food Wine Festival. Participate in a hands-on cooking class with some of Poipu’s top chefs in their own restaurant. Classes at $50.00 per person per class will be limited in size and include a tasting and a commemorative gift. NTBG Free Weekly Hula Show OCCURS BETWEEN: THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2018 - THURSDAY, DECEMBER 26, 2019, 2:00PM - 2:45PM Come out the National Tropical Botancial Garden South Shore Visitors Center and experience a traditional hula performance. Wahine Comedy Festival (4th Annual) OCCURS BETWEEN: FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 2018 - SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 10, 2018, 8:00PM - 10:00PM The Female Comics of Hawaii present the 2018 4th Annual Wahine Comedy Festival at Trees Lounge in Kapaa on Veteran's Day weekend: Friday 11/9 and Saturday 11/10 8-10pm both nites. Enjoy original standup comedy. Na Hoku comedy album winner Brandi Morgan from Oahu headlines

Dealing With Crime In Business in Japan   Crime is going to be a feature of any society.  There are going to be different elements of crime – activities that affect your personal safety, fraud coming from outside your firm and fraud coming from within your company.  Organised crime the Yakuza are well established here.  They even have their offices with their own shingle, announcing which gang they are. They are not as strong as they once were, but they are still a force.  The chances of a foreign run business having trouble with the Yakuza is pretty low. For cultural and language reasons they find dealing with us too hard.  There are plenty of local Japanese they can exploit and that is a much easier to do.    They run prostitution, drugs and extortion.  There have been media reports at different times of a Japanese company President or employee being killed by Yakuza, because he wouldn't pay them off or whatever. A new law introduced a few years ago that held the gang boss response for the crimes of his underlings, has had a strong negative impact on the Yakuza, but they are still operating and probably always will be.    You are more likely to run into Yakuza in a club or bar.  You are out on the town, you go for drinks, and are having a great time.  When you get the bill, it is the equivalent of the GNP of a medium sized African country.  You protest and that is when the Yakuza chinpiraor punks, appear to persuade you to shut up and pay.  And you better pay.    If you go to places like Roppongi or Kabukicho in Shinjuku in Tokyo, then you will be in Yakuza territory and they will be running clubs and bars.  If you get into any trouble with Yakuza on the street, the safest place for you is at the police Koban or police box.  Don't try and sort it out yourself, get the cops involved.  Anyway, you will have to work pretty hard to get yourself into trouble with the Yakuza in Japan, it is very, very unlikely to ever happen.   Fraud is a different question.  There are plenty of cases here of Japanese being taken to the cleaners through fraud. They have their share of ponzi schemes here too.  Often they are pretty bad ponzi schemes, in the sense they collect the money and then rapidly disappear. They don't even bother to string it out over a number of years like Bernard Madoff did in the US.  Here they grab your cash and then they are long gone.   You also hear anecdotal cases where family wealth has been stolen through business dealings with bad people.  My Japanese wife's family and friends all know of cases where a solid family has lost wealth through fraud from supposedly reliable business partners. Fraud does happen here.  If the deal sounds too good to be true, it is probably not something you want to be part of.  There is no such thing as a free lunch in business and it is all hard work, hard work, hard work.   It is very difficult at the start to distinguish which business partners are the good ones guys and which ones are the crooks. Keep you wits about you.  Having said that, the chances of this happening are pretty slight.  Again all of those cultural and language issues make it hard for them to target you. And there are so many gullible Japanese kamo or targets anyway, why waste their time on the likes of you.  Counter intuitively, speaking Japanese can be a disadvantage in this regard. I was a kamoin a real estate deal here and did lose a considerable sum of dough as a result.  They had all the aces as it turned out and all I had was ignorance, but it was a strong lesson to do your due diligence here really well.    The other part of fraud is inside your own company.  There are no shortage of cases of people stealing from banks, from their companies, etc. It does happen.  In big companies, some staff are fabricating expense reports, to get the cash for themselves.  There was a case recently of a bank employee who was hiving off cash from some transactions he was involved in.  Often it is driven by bad gambling debts and they become desperate to pay the money back, especially if they are dealing with the Yakuza.  Stealing from you sounds a lot better than getting beaten up or killed by the gang.    In the past, some of the short term, high interest cash loan businesses would use Yakuza muscle to collect the money.  The usurious interest rates made it virtually impossible to ever clear the loan. That got cleaned up after a lot of scandals surfaced, but there is a lot of pressure to pay the loan back, so stealing from your employer starts to look like the only way out.  The other usual driver is the middle aged married guy, trying to fund his young girlfriend's required lifestyle and he starts taking money from the company to make it all work.  This can be going on for years, before it is finally discovered.    Part of that reason is that Japan is such an honest culture that we all get lulled into a false sense of security.  We don't have the checks and balances in place because we are so trusting.  The people involved have worked out the weaknesses in the system and they exploit that gap for their own financial benefit. Japan is a very honest country, so the chances of this happening are quite low, but they are not zero.  So we should make sure we have some mechanisms in place to just be on the safe side of the equation.